Roseanne Barr on Her Incredible Career, Her Emotional ABC Exit, and Optimism About Our Culture ｜ Ep. 787
Episode Stats
Words per Minute
164.5651
Summary
Roseanne is back on The Megyn Kelly Show! And she's joined by her good friend and former co-worker, Meghan Markle. They talk about Roseanne's life growing up in the 60s and 70s, how she got her start in comedy, and how she became one of the funniest people in the world.
Transcript
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We like to walk that fine line between techno thriller
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Live on Sirius XM Channel 111 every weekday at New East.
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I'm Megyn Kelly. Welcome to The Megyn Kelly Show.
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Roseanne plays Principal Bortles in Mr. Burcham.
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Roseanne was last with us in episode 552 last year.
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So many fun facts about Roseanne that I did not know.
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And her journey to becoming one of the biggest stars in the world.
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So check that out when you have some spare time.
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And I'm super excited to have her back on the show today.
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It was wrong to stay out as late as I did for being as old as I am.
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It really was because the best part of it was that it was only a half hour long to watch something.
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I fall asleep after about seven minutes if it's a like really killer thing where people are getting killed and there's a lot of things going on.
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I can't sit through a movie for more than seven minutes.
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So this one, I had a lot of coffee and I stayed coherent and awake 30 minutes watching.
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I've never seen a 30 minute premiere in my life and it was fabulous.
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It was the perfect timing to sit there for an old person and not have to go to the bathroom, put it on pause.
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I know that I've been here for time immemorial and I've never died.
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I've had a thousand incarnations and I'll have a thousand more.
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She tried, but I had to wash her mouth out with soap by the end of the night.
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That's one of my, I love the movie with Albert Brooks.
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She is featured in a Meryl Streep defending your life.
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She comes in as part of the past lives pavilion piece where you can go into this pavilion.
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It's about people who are kind of in purgatory and figure out what you used to be like.
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You were a warrior or were you more like a sheep?
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Well, I think as the, you know, if I refer to the Torah, which I do study because I am
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a Jew, you know, which I, I hate to say right now because it's a dangerous subject, which
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It says, I've always been a fat old Jew every lifetime.
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I've been a fat old nosy Jewish woman that is always in trouble with her big mouth.
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I mean, it really is a blast other than, uh, fearing that free speech is being shut down
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to such an extent that you can't just say, you can't just verbally be a poet or an artist
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somebody who is a provocateur or which all comes together in comedian.
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And that's why I'm going to start referring to myself as the artist formerly known as Roseanne.
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And I'm thinking it's this kind of an age and principal Bortles is that she kind of is a George
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And well, cause I told you the nicotine thing, you know, these are nicotine leaves.
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He was there last night distributing his favorite cigars.
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And this is, I believe Michael Knowles offering we have here.
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And I said that God is providing me with a way to satisfy my great craving for nicotine right now.
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But as soon as I get around comics, I've got to smoke.
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I got one vape to, you know, wake up and another vape to go to sleep.
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Because my daughter-in-law said I can't get near the baby if I don't give up cigarettes.
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My entire life is a hypnotic trance of some sort.
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Because I never really know where I am or what I'm doing.
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But yeah, he does look like me and he's a good son.
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Well, I went down looking for a Bloody Mary cause they had me in this hotel ride on the
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I need a Bloody Mary or my bowel seized up like a goddamn submarine, you know.
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So anyways, I have to walk down and I walk in this place, get me a Bloody Mary.
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I go, oh my God, do you know how much I love you?
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And I just was walking in there and meeting her.
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I was going to guess Larry the cable guy from that invitation.
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Where I stayed, it was all guys from the Milken Conference, which is going on out here.
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I don't know anything about finance, but this is a big conference where I guess Elon Musk
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is here and all these muckety mucks from Wall Street and finance.
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And I said to Doug, my husband, I'm like, didn't he go to jail for like a felon?
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But, you know, it just goes to show if you make enough money before the fraud, you can
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And even if it does get investigated and you get caught, you get let off.
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They're saying she's in jail on Epstein Island.
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What kind of prison do you think Trump might be looking at if he violates his gag order
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I think they are going to try to put him in prison.
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Well, they have to because that's what they do to all the innocent.
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Anybody who speaks out and says anything having to do with the truth, that's why you've
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You've got to give only a certain amount of truth with a whole bunch of bullshit behind
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And I did win, although I did sign an NDA never to discuss the terms.
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But I did win under RICO because it ain't nothing but organized crime.
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And they're all about to get caught and go down.
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So, like, were they saying things about you during the show?
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Yeah, that was a huge, that was the biggest mind screw you'll ever, I'm writing a book,
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Yeah, I'm going to write a book where I tell all the personal secrets of all my former
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I'm going to tell every dirty thing I helped them cover up that they have forgotten about,
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I mean, I just don't know what's wrong with people.
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If I, I would not, I would be careful of offending the Jews.
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I mean, they always say, as you can see on every form of media, especially on the internets,
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everything's the Jews' fault, they all say it is, and yet, they want to fuck with us.
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You want to live up to that and show them the power.
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But I mean, well, don't go saying that we run everything and then try to fuck with us,
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You'd be surprised how things do actually work.
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You know, in the beginning of the show, Adam Carolla was saying he can't stand Sarah Gilbert,
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I think he called her a bitch, and said when he went on her talk show, she was a nightmare
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Because, I mean, does he have any idea what, how she means to harm people?
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I should have fired her when I seen her trying to harm another woman star back in the day.
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She was taking some of her, they were kind of the four cursors to Antifa.
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She was taking some of her pals there, and they was going over to stand in a woman who
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had her own television show and made the unfortunate mistake of wearing a fur.
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And they went and stood in her yard when her children were in that house and called her
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And I called her in and I said, I will fire you from this show if you ever come against
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I mean, but, I mean, can you imagine the self-righteousness?
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No, to go in somebody else's home on their property and judge them.
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By the way, we're at the top of the food chain.
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You've been in Hollywood forever, and you are in the upper rungs of the ruling class that
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congratulates themselves at every benefit on earth.
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You're a princess, and you're going to come against a woman who's just coming up?
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You're going to smash her face under your jack boot?
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If you don't toad the line as a woman, as an artist, or, you know, as a free thinker,
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or any party that they try to ram down our throats.
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They're just do what they do and steal us blind.
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And I want to see so many black Republicans running the new Republican Party, because that
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party was founded by Frederick Douglass, which nobody on the left even knows.
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Wait, let me jump back, because I wondered when you were talking about-
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You were talking about Hollywood and what happens.
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And I can't stop thinking about J.K. Rowling and how-
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All these young stars who we would never know their names had it not been for her turned
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on her because they thought she got too controversial.
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I knew it was going to happen to her because she didn't stand up for me.
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You know, people forget, even though she's out there on the gender thing.
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I mean, but you know, the lefties don't generally stand up for people.
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The lefties voted for Trump after what they'd done to Bernie.
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That's why he's got- That's why he kicked Hillary's ass is because of that.
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Did you feel sorry for J.K. Rowling or no, because she didn't-
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When you're first on the cross, it's hard to feel sorry for people who just walk by you
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It's hard to feel sorry when they're next hanging next to you there.
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It's hard, but if you are a person of faith, well, you have to.
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And so, you know, you have to go, well, you know, I forgive you for not even asking me what did I mean after knowing me for a generation and a half or, you know, before judging me so harshly.
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And then refusing to allow me to explain, because I had a contract in my contract said, I knew I was going to get in trouble.
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I, I am like a, whatever I am, a comic something, but I like, I like a free flow of ideas from, you know, I like to, you know, I mean, I like to go on stage and do a lot of characters and stuff like that.
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I'm not doing a good job of it today, but there's a lot of ideas going and-
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Did you have something in the contract that said you can't fire me if I say something?
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I had a thing saying I had 24 hours to cure anything I said, which would be taken as offensive by the advertisers.
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Uh, I could not be allowed on any of their other programs, which like I go, Hey, put me on the view or Jimmy Kimmel. Those guys have both done blackface. So obviously you don't, you don't have, you got double standards on your racism crap.
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And, uh, you know, joy says she was imitating a beautiful black princess queen or something. Okay. Well, it's blackface. Yeah. Anyway.
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Whoopi defended it and Whoopi stood next to Ted Danson in minstrel show blackface at a roast and thought it was hilarious. Yeah. Those are the same people judging you.
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And it kind of was hilarious. Well, we used to be at a point of her sitting next to him laughing, but that made it hilarious because it was a statement there, but you know, it was her going, Hey, I got a white man puppet now.
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But can I tell you something like those same bitches? They didn't defend me when I just said people used to do this, this blackface. I wasn't talking about minstrel show blackface. I was talking about column and they also didn't defend me. So this is what they do, right?
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They sat there at your network and let them drive you out of the network, out of your own show. They didn't say a word. They have no courage.
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Well, Whoopi did say, she said, well, I have a feeling that Roseanne didn't mean nothing racist, that she did what she did so that we could all learn something. I saw her say that one time and I was like, Hey, why don't you call me up, bitch? And then ask me that on the air so I can have a chance to say, particularly now that what I was talking about was the Iran deal and it's the existential threat it posed to Israel.
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We went over it the last time. As evidenced by October 7th.
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Which now is going to be World War III, I guess. I hope not. I pray not.
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Well, let me ask you a question about that because we talked about, you know, what you said and how they fired you and all that the last time.
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Yeah, they refused to allow me to explain what I meant because they just loved the Iran deal so much.
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Well, and they just wanted it, like they decided it was too controversial.
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They wanted me to come back so they could get rid of me and kill my character because I like Trump.
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Because it's been a few years now. What, like five, six, six years?
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And I was surprised last night because you brought it up on the stage when we were doing the Bertram Q&A after the premiere.
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Well, no, I just, I said, oh my God, it's still really, it's right there for her, you know, because this was-
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Well, she, you know, wrote that off her blood and sweat and tears for 20, you know, for years on the comedy stages, you know, having shit thrown at her head because people didn't like funny women.
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Like you raised on welfare in Denver and just decided, I'm going to give this a try.
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Always broke, broke every rule on TV that tried to make people feel shame in who they were or, or to try to divide the races.
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And they always hated that I, I asked for, I demanded black characters and black writers.
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And when I want to have a black granddaughter, you cannot imagine the fight they put me through.
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And then what they wrote for her, I wouldn't allow.
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So I, I policed the writer's room for their, their ideas on race are so obsolete and, um, they're just racist.
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I mean, their comments on what the work, what they think working people.
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I mean, plus, you know, look, did you see just, just two days ago, the governor of New York, Kathy Hochul, what she said about black kids in the Bronx.
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If we do, it's gotten like a couple of mentions here or there.
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To build a phenomenal supercomputer that is going to be accessible to researchers in New York, college students.
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And I want others to follow because right now we have, you know, young black kids growing up in the Bronx who don't even know what the word computer is.
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And I want the world to open up to all of them.
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And the reason there's no blowback is because they agree with her.
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These people who are lecturing everybody about race all the time didn't see anything wrong with what she said.
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Well, because they don't know any black people.
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The only black people they know are in their circle.
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And those black people, they probably don't know any working class type black people or middle class black people, probably not at all either.
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Because they just live in a bubble of very privileged, wealthy people that don't go no place but with people they call their enemies.
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They have the same amount of money and the same donors.
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They don't care about the American people, obviously.
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They don't like the American workers because we want, like, I say we, but sometimes I still feel like, you know, I'm the mom of it all.
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And I'm not going to let them take that from me.
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Isn't that what you said was going to be on your gravestone?
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But, no, but I mean, because I know that their ideas are so ugly.
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And I came up from, you know, pre-integrated working class area.
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And I was, we were on welfare, you know, my family.
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There was a lot of, a lot of weird intermixes going on there.
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And everybody was married to their first cousin, too.
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Wait, do we have time to show her clip of Principal Borders?
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They've been with us this whole two hours on our Mr. Birch of Deep Dive.
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This idiot is pretending to be a vet just to get a free meal.
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It was really fun being able to play a really out of control, horrible person.
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And she gets more horrible all the time, like sexually harassing the workers and such.
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I'm Megan Kelly, host of The Megan Kelly Show on Sirius XM.
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00:24:55.880
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00:25:48.960
Roseanne Barr, my co-star in Mr. Burcham is with me.
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I mean, that's like, I'm, I'm embarrassed to even say co-star with you.
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I read lines and I have to say, Roseanne, I really enjoyed it.
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I can tell you, I can tell that you enjoyed it.
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You've got the, uh, you've got the bones for it.
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I'm going to give, I'm taking you under my, uh, tutelage.
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I'm going to teach you about timing in the boom.
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I'm going to teach you because I'm, I just know once you get it, you're going to really
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That, I didn't know that was something you could learn.
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I thought that kind of thing was a gift that you either had or didn't have.
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But if you might not be seeing it because you haven't been doing it that long.
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Oh, I'm excited to learn that there's a way of doing that better.
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They were asking to sketch and it was like, I don't know how to do that.
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I only know how to paint, but I'll take a little journey over to your sketch pad and
00:27:06.980
You're, I mean, you and, uh, Tyler are the funny, like Mr. Carpanzi.
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I mean, Tyler is the funniest one of the, I mean, all these comics though, these young
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And, uh, and you know, just to be able to, uh, jam.
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Um, I guess it's like kind of jazz, you know, jazz, jamming and stuff, spent a life in comedy
00:27:45.080
It's very uplifting and it's a very smart, clever group.
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Uh, I like to, I like to, uh, push the limits with people to see what, when they stop thinking
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I'm serious and I realize I went over into the absurd.
00:28:00.920
Well, that's why I always laugh when the left wing press does these big articles.
00:28:09.460
She's provoking you and you're walking right into it.
00:28:18.540
Now, what about, you were mentioning during the break, we kept our conversation going about
00:28:24.060
Oh, I like to slap her right upside the head there.
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Very gently, nothing serious to harm her in any way, just to kind of realign a little
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As I say, all my former liberal friends, I just like to slap them upside the head and see
00:28:39.640
their eyes wiggle just a little to note they've been corrected.
00:28:46.640
Well, her stuff on the Jewish people is offensive to me as a Jew, particularly since she culturally
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appropriated the name Goldberg and she's not a Jew.
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When she did her whole bit about how Jews are white and therefore they're not in a minority
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group, she got in trouble about this comments months before 10-7.
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Off, they didn't kill her character and fire her and steal her life's work.
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But, um, cause she does, she's, she's still, uh, useful to them, you know?
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And, uh, you know, it's pretty amazing to watch it.
00:29:32.360
I never watch that show cause it makes my blood boil.
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I thought about just walking on though, cause they wouldn't stop me.
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I was going to walk right on that show and right on Jimmy Kimmel too.
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Cause, you know, uh, I added significant numbers to their shows during a significant amount
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I hope they all wear the adult diapers like I do.
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Uh, maybe I could put out a warning that I may walk on, but I don't think anybody would
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stop me in the crew or something like that, especially if I had a camera crew with me.
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And I just walk on and go, let's just get really real about, uh, what's real.
00:30:19.520
Like, well, if you were sitting across from Whoopi on that set.
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Is it a big cover Iran and the border or is one a cover for the other?
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I mean, what, why is our country in this place?
00:30:48.420
What do you make of what's happening on the college campuses with the anti-Semitism that
00:30:55.780
But what do you think about like the, the American students showing their hand in a way that's,
00:31:05.340
It's, it's just like in Germany, the first place where they introduce false science,
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which is Monsanto science, which I call Monsatan, Monsatan Inc.
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false science, um, that isn't, doesn't follow the patterns of science, like being peer reviewed
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and having follow up and things like that for pharmaceuticals, one thing, false science and,
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uh, and, uh, learning for money from the highest donors, which don't even come from the United
00:31:50.480
States and have an agenda, which is, uh, to me, it's, um,
00:31:59.320
the New World Order, NWO, the NWO, everyone says New World Order, but to me, it's the Nazi
00:32:11.780
World Order because the Nazis did not lose World War II.
00:32:17.740
You know, they came here in Operation Paperclip and they took over our sciences and our space
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program and you can Google it, but they don't teach this in universities.
00:32:30.660
And, um, uh, Persia was renamed Iran, which means Aryan in Farsi by Hitler.
00:33:04.160
It's like the ultimate war, Armageddon, I guess, the end of time and the end of days.
00:33:21.160
Well, I think it's a movie and I think Biden isn't Biden.
00:33:40.540
Because nobody else can trip up that stairs five times in a row, but Jim Carrey like that.
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I don't think any of us really know anything that's going on.
00:33:53.120
There's things going on that don't, don't make any sense at all.
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I mean, it's on another level that we're not hearing about in any news show.
00:34:05.920
Something really other is happening and it's being fought in ways we don't even know about.
00:34:17.100
That's where warfare is being conducted worldwide now, you know, tunnel subterranean warfare.
00:34:23.160
I'm curious, like, where, where do you get your news?
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Like, how do you bone up on the news when you don't trust news and you don't?
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Classified CIA documents and government documents.
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Like you, that you Google on the internet or is there somebody you trust or how do you?
00:34:48.700
Of our allies as well, not just of the United States State Department, but of our allies in the U.N.
00:34:57.000
And there, and I also read the papal bulls from the Vatican.
00:35:02.220
And I also read statements out of Switzerland, Basel, Switzerland and stuff.
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I read really deep stuff because I love to read.
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And I read, because I read and tweet at many sites, some of them are with a lot of really intelligent people worldwide.
00:35:32.160
How do you make sure, this is one of the big questions in, you know, this decade, this century.
00:35:37.100
How do you make sure that you don't get manipulated, that somebody doesn't corrupt you with fake news, fake information, right?
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How do, I mean, not just you, but anyone, you know, how does.
00:35:56.700
Really check references and sources and verification of a variety of sources.
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Otherwise, you are going to be duped because it's all about duping you.
00:36:14.340
So we'll be, uh, you know, docile and go along.
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That's what happened in Germany is fear, fear makes docile people, but, uh, also, words are the greatest weapon.
00:36:38.100
They can't, I mean, they can try to shut down words.
00:36:42.020
They've screwed with the meaning of so many of them.
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And, and when you contemplate the meaning of words deeply, uh, you often come up with almost the complete opposite of what they're selling.
00:37:02.660
Like when banks say they, um, are, they use the word fidelity and trust banks.
00:37:15.040
And that's all to fool us because they want to steal our money.
00:37:18.260
They want to steal everything we got and make us eat bugs.
00:37:28.440
Notwithstanding all the nonsense, you know, I always.
00:37:34.420
I don't have much faith in the competence of our leaders.
00:37:41.000
But like to pull off a scheme like this, I just don't think they're smart enough or well organized enough.
00:37:47.360
I think they just got a far left ideological agenda that manifests in industry after industry and policy after policy and that they need to be fought whack-a-mole style as they come up until sane people can regain their positions in power.
00:38:05.360
But when they get there, they won't find the secret documents of the cabal and the plan and what they were trying to do with us.
00:38:11.580
They'll just find genuine hard left ideology that's been baked into our system generation after generation now as we sat back and ignored it and thought it would go away.
00:38:29.980
But except for the whack-a-mole part, because there's too many moles.
00:38:34.840
But I think what's happening instead, I do think intelligence is winning.
00:38:40.760
And intelligence acts like a magnet to like intelligence.
00:38:45.800
And so I think that we all are magnetizing to each other and waking each other up higher and higher.
00:38:52.480
But the whack-a-mole thing, I think they are exposing themselves in front of our eyes.
00:38:59.620
And our job is to witness it and make sure it registers, not to forget it, but to see who they are, see how their system works against us.
00:39:11.320
And I think that's hard for us because we've been so trained never to assign the blame upward.
00:39:19.700
The mind control program was always to make us lay blame laterally or on the middleman, which is anti-Semitism, but never to assign the blame all the way up to the tippy-top where the people who actually cause all the problems sit.
00:39:53.980
Because the mind control program is so severe that were I even to say the words, people wouldn't believe it.
00:40:08.020
But when you say, I mean, you're talking about beyond elected leadership?
00:40:10.800
No, I'm talking about the people who own the world.
00:40:39.920
And we are like, I don't know who's controlling this.
00:40:48.560
But some of us are waking up and going, you know what?
00:40:51.480
There isn't like just a few families that should own everything in the world.
00:41:02.900
Because arrogance always accompanies ignorance.
00:41:07.640
They're always the same, two sides of the same coin.
00:41:13.540
And so their arrogance is such that they've actually made with their greed and their whatever
00:41:19.860
they do in their bubbles and their bursting bubbles and making more bubbles and their
00:41:25.320
They've actually made money obsolete and it's worthless.
00:41:30.920
That's my optimistic sign of the future because that is the dream of the end of debt slavery.
00:41:48.820
And it will be replaced with a better system that works for human beings, all human beings.
00:41:56.060
And it'll come from us and our intelligence because we have the will and the means and
00:42:02.240
all the technology to do that without money, but with something else.
00:42:10.000
Let's leave it on that optimistic note and shift before we go to something we talked about
00:42:15.260
during the break, which is these days you're splitting your time between Texas and Hawaii.
00:42:23.540
Now, somebody who owns the world lives in Hawaii most of the time.
00:42:32.640
I live on the barefoot island where everybody tries to raise organic crops and fails because
00:42:59.840
But I like to think and write, so I don't have a lot of friends.
00:43:06.720
Did you before the whole scandal or did they...
00:43:08.360
You had them and they abandoned you or you've never been somebody who's got a ton of friends?
00:43:21.260
But when I'm in a friendly mood, like I'm always the life of the party.
00:43:27.000
I started the show by saying that about last night.
00:43:31.440
I love it when people are staring at me and laughing.
00:43:50.480
Even though you created a whole show around principles like that where you made fun of
00:43:57.200
I happen to think that fat jokes are the funniest jokes in the whole world.
00:44:01.720
They're threatening to take our fat jokes away.
00:44:06.820
Because without fat jokes, we're just nothing but a fascist nation.
00:44:10.980
Have you seen some of the college-age pro-Palestinian protesters on their hunger strikes and the
00:44:17.820
I mean, this thing could go on for a long time.
00:44:20.460
Well, one of my sponsors is one of these stun gun things for self-defense.
00:44:31.680
But I changed it to a 350-pound lesbian with blue hair.
00:44:36.760
Because, I mean, they are threatening to beat up women.
00:44:44.140
It's the trans people who are threatening to beat up women at every turn.
00:44:47.500
These guys are all over the internet threatening us if we try to keep them out of our bathrooms.
00:44:51.320
But their best friend is a 300-pound, 350-pound lesbian.
00:44:59.640
The gay guy that wore his mom's dresses was always friends with the big fatty.
00:45:06.280
I was always best friends with all the gay guys that wore their mom's dress.
00:45:13.420
And I find out because they make us eat everything because they're always skinny.
00:45:21.560
And they make us consume everything that they're too afraid to because they are food abhorrent.
00:45:32.080
And I was happy to be that person because I love to eat.
00:45:37.520
And you just told me you live remotely in Texas.
00:45:44.120
Like you have to pop up every once in a while because you miss people?
00:45:47.360
I'll tell you, I go to town probably every day.
00:45:51.520
And I talk to, you know, the people on the street.
00:45:57.700
And I buy items from all the stores because I try to help my town stay in business.
00:46:03.800
And so I just love to do stuff like that and talk politics with people.
00:46:14.180
But I love to talk politics with all these socialists.
00:46:22.620
And so I just feel that's an important thing for me to say.
00:46:25.660
And a lot of us are just trying to grow food and have chickens and such like basic lives.
00:46:35.140
But I'll tell you what one thing that does happen is these people know how to party.
00:46:46.840
And I'll tell you, I'm the life of them parties too.
00:46:51.260
I find it very easy to believe you were last night in a room full of hysterical, funny people.
00:47:00.780
I mean, like Kyle Dunnigan is covered in Mr. Bircham merch.
00:47:05.240
You didn't go grab the, you didn't get the bag by the door.
00:47:11.000
Please look for the plastic bag next to the door on the exit.
00:47:23.840
It's wonderful to be sitting across from you and sharing a fake stage for you in our show.
00:47:29.600
And you're going to hang out with me and learn more about the boom.
00:47:35.820
I, well, then we'll bring it back to the audience and we'll tell them how you taught me and we'll
00:47:41.000
I think you've got the bones to like do actual standup on the stage.
00:47:48.000
She, how it's not true, but she's so lovely to offer the compliment.