I hope you like ice. I hope you always have an itch on the bottom of your foot. I hope your pillow is constantly warm, you stub your toe every single day, I hope every single time you put on a new pair of socks, you step in a puddle of water, you have to go to the bathroom in the rain, you hit every single red light when you re stuck in traffic, you ve got a bad nose ring like your great-grandpa, you re a piece of shit, and you re going to die the next day.