The NXR Podcast - BONUS EPISODE - How Much Authority Does A Husband⧸Father Actually Have？

00:00:00.000 All right, listen, guys, I get it.

00:00:01.900 Many of you are unable to financially support this ministry because you're spending your

00:00:05.900 cash and your lives on raising young children in the fear and admonition of the Lord.

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00:00:13.860 However, algorithms are a thing.

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00:00:19.000 And one major way that you can help to expand the reach and effectiveness of this ministry

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00:00:31.900 perhaps even more effective than that, you can share our podcast with a friend. We hope you'll

00:00:37.100 take the time to do so. Thank you so much. God bless. Welcome back to another Monday Live with

00:00:45.420 yours truly, Pastor Joel Webin, host of Right Response Ministries. We skipped last Monday because

00:00:52.560 we had just completed our conference the theonomy and post-millennialism conference it was a great

00:00:58.460 turnout we had 550 people who registered the room that we were able to rent the venue only

00:01:05.360 really seats about 475 500's already pushing it so we had to cap out at 550 we had another 200

00:01:12.980 people that were signed up on a waiting list and so there were a lot of people that were interested

00:01:17.380 In this event, we had Dr. James White, Pastor Dale Partridge, we had Dr. Joseph Boot, and myself.

00:01:24.580 We did a couple panels. We did seven primary lectures.

00:01:28.260 The conference was a great time of encouragement in hopeful eschatology, Christ victory here and now.

00:01:36.560 That Christ is reigning now, not just that he will reign then, but reigning now.

00:01:41.820 And he's not just reigning spiritually in heaven, but he's reigning here on earth.

00:01:46.920 So this present reign of Christ that is both here and now,

00:01:53.060 his victory progressively working through the whole earth

00:01:56.480 as he's subduing each of his enemies as a footstool for his feet,

00:02:02.600 and theonomy, the goodness of God's law,

00:02:05.240 pushing back against the antinomianism that has become so pervasive in our culture

00:02:11.520 and even the evangelical church culture today,

00:02:14.540 the goodness of god's law general equity theonomy taking the general equity of all of god's law that

00:02:21.000 we find throughout the scripture including the old testament and applying it to all of life every

00:02:26.980 single realm of human society all of christ for all of life because he is reigning now and he is

00:02:33.980 reigning here so that was a highly successful encouraging event i got to speak to probably

00:02:40.500 200 of you in just personal brief conversations throughout the couple days of the conference.

00:02:47.980 You were so encouraging to me. I'm so grateful for you and I'm excited to say that in light of

00:02:55.080 the conference, being so successful and seeing that there's such a need and a desire for

00:03:01.080 hopeful eschatology and the goodness of God's law, all of Christ, for all of life,

00:03:06.500 we want to make this a regular event and not just doing this once a year but we actually want to

00:03:12.400 hold two conferences every single year we want to have a large spring conference and then we want to

00:03:18.460 also have a smaller fall conference and so i want to take a moment real quick and just announce our

00:03:24.300 upcoming two conferences so we just finished our late spring conference that was last weekend well

00:03:32.340 not this most recent last weekend, but the weekend before that, May 5th, 6th, and 7th. That's why we

00:03:38.120 took off on Monday the 8th, but we're back every Monday at 2 p.m. Central Time, live on YouTube.

00:03:44.100 We'll be back on that rhythm, but we took off for that conference. That was our late spring

00:03:48.320 conference, and now we have our fall conference that I want to announce, and then we'll have our

00:03:53.180 spring conference again next year. This is the fall conference. It's called The Household and

00:03:58.040 The War for the Cosmos. Now, some of you might be saying, Joel, you can't use that title. That's

00:04:02.740 the title of Chris Wiley's book. Well, Chris Wiley is speaking at the conference, and I got

00:04:07.640 his permission to use it as the title for the conference. So, we're all good. So, we've got

00:04:12.580 Chris Wiley, or C.R. Wiley is how he signs his books. You might be more familiar with him as an

00:04:18.760 author. We also have Jared Longshore, who will be speaking at the conference. He's a pastor with

00:04:25.100 Doug Wilson in Moscow, Idaho, and then myself.

00:04:28.480 We'll have multiple sessions with each of us,

00:04:32.240 and then we'll have a panel with all three of us

00:04:35.200 discussing parenting, discussing marriage,

00:04:38.820 biblical patriarchy with hopeful eschatology,

00:04:42.520 households as the primary building block

00:04:45.420 for ushering back in a new Christendom

00:04:48.860 as we seek to push for the crown rights of King Jesus

00:04:52.940 over every square inch so that's going to be this fall it's going to be a full day saturday and then

00:04:59.100 holding over kind of overflowing to the lord's day our lord's day worship with the church that

00:05:03.940 i pastor covenant bible church north of austin texas and so by the way if you're in central

00:05:09.840 texas looking for a good church go to covenant bible.org covenant bible.org come and check us

00:05:16.420 out so that'll be again this conference the household and the war for the cosmos with chris

00:05:21.500 wiley and jared longshore and myself full day saturday that's november 11th and then hold over

00:05:28.520 with the lord's day jared will stay and preach for us that morning that's sunday november 12th so

00:05:35.000 november 11th and november 12th and you can register for this conference right now by going

00:05:40.260 to right response conference.com again that's right response conference.com that's the fall

00:05:47.320 conference. We're excited. Here is the spring conference. So two conferences every year. We

00:05:53.080 just finished our spring conference. We've got the fall conference coming up. And then for next

00:05:56.940 year, we're going ahead and receiving registrations as of today for our spring conference. It's going

00:06:03.980 to be March 1st, 2nd, and 3rd. That's a Friday, full day Friday, full day Saturday. And again,

00:06:10.300 hold over for the Lord's Day Sunday. We're going to have Douglas Wilson. He will be one of our 0.65

00:06:15.800 speakers brian sovey from ogden utah you might know him from the king's hall podcast or haunted

00:06:22.300 cosmos or bright heart we're also going to have again dr joseph boot and then again myself joel

00:06:29.680 webin so douglas wilson pastor of christ church in moscow idaho we'll have brian sovey we'll have

00:06:36.820 dr joseph boot and myself the title for this conference is the king and his kingdom the king

00:06:43.800 and his kingdom. A subtitle that we're using is this, Seven Doctrines for Ruling the World.

00:06:50.760 We are called to exercise Christian stewardship. The biblical command is not that the Christian

00:06:58.040 abstain from ruling or that they abdicate a responsibility to rule, but rather the command

00:07:05.560 for Christians, especially Christian men in their homes, in the church, in the state,

00:07:10.540 In all these various spheres, as Christians, we are stewards, we are ambassadors, we are a kingdom of priests.

00:07:19.160 We are little kings. We are called to rule.

00:07:21.600 So we don't just try to abdicate rulership or reject ruling, reject power and authority,

00:07:29.520 but rather the biblical command is to rule righteously.

00:07:34.440 So, seven doctrines for ruling the world that's assumed in that, implicit in that subtitle, is these are seven doctrines that thoroughly equip Christians to rule the world righteously with every single sphere of human society.

00:07:52.680 to rule well in the home in the church in the state and markets and vocation and medicine and

00:07:59.700 media and academia that we are called to exercise godly stewardship exercise godly dominion so we're

00:08:08.640 going to have seven main sessions with these speakers we will probably be inviting a few more

00:08:14.720 guys to join us as speakers and we'll announce that as it unfolds but for now we have officially

00:08:20.900 confirm douglas wilson brian sauvet joe boot myself seven main sessions there's going to be

00:08:27.540 two panel discussions throughout this conference and then a holdover for the lord's day which will

00:08:32.820 be sunday march 3rd so that's friday saturday sunday march 1st 2nd and 3rd 2024 next year

00:08:41.160 the king and his kingdom seven doctrines for ruling the world again we have 550 people

00:08:48.460 register for this last conference the theonomy and post-millennialism conference with 200

00:08:55.000 more people on a waiting list so we have in faith gone ahead and officially booked a larger venue

00:09:01.780 that seats about a thousand people but here's the deal i'm announcing it publicly right now for the

00:09:08.440 very first time but we did announce it to those who were in attendance at our last conference

00:09:13.640 and 260 of them have already registered so we have a thousand spots but we're already down to

00:09:21.340 less than 750 we're already over 25 percent full and i'm announcing it publicly for the very first

00:09:29.900 time right now so here's my point the point is that this conference is going to fill up incredibly

00:09:36.020 fast we sold out our last conference theonomy and postmillennialism we sold that conference out

00:09:41.800 six months before the event actually took place i warned you guys i told you that there is an

00:09:48.180 incredible demand and desire for hopeful eschatology and the goodness of god even faster

00:09:53.980 again we're at 260 registrations right now we have about 740 registration spots left open

00:10:02.200 i encourage you to go to right response conference.com right response conference.com

00:10:09.200 and register for both of these conferences as quickly as possible.

00:10:14.000 The last thing that I'll say on this note is the seven doctrines,

00:10:17.500 to be a little bit specific here,

00:10:19.500 the seven doctrines that we're going to be teaching on

00:10:22.060 is number one, reformed confessional theology.

00:10:26.820 Confessional reformed theology, right?

00:10:29.680 So this idea of we want to be reformed,

00:10:32.380 we want to understand the sovereignty of God in every realm of life,

00:10:36.700 and we want to be confessionally reformed.

00:10:39.380 We want to hold to historic reformed doctrine.

00:10:43.500 That's number one.

00:10:44.220 Number two, covenant theology.

00:10:46.820 Not dispensationalism, but God working through covenants.

00:10:50.840 He's done this throughout all of biblical history

00:10:54.500 and the last 2,000 years of church history.

00:10:57.320 He's the same yesterday, today, and forever.

00:11:00.200 So covenant theology.

00:11:02.100 Next is biblical patriarchy.

00:11:04.020 so reformed confessional theology covenant theology biblical patriarchy father rule in the home

00:11:11.800 in the church and in the civil realm as well then we have presuppositionalism presuppositionalism

00:11:19.980 then after that kyperianism all of christ for all of life every square inch belonging to king jesus

00:11:26.660 number six is going to be general equity theonomy and number seven is post-millennial eschatology

00:11:34.060 so confessionally reformed covenant theology biblical patriarchy presuppositionalism

00:11:42.180 kyperianism general equity theonomy and post-millennialism seven sessions one session

00:11:50.000 each for each of these seven doctrines and then two panel discussions where we

00:11:55.400 tackle some of the big questions and issues and theological topics that are going on for the

00:12:01.460 church today you're not going to want to miss this event with again douglas wilson brian sovey

00:12:06.980 joe boot and myself with other guys who will be announced shortly who will be coming into the mix

00:12:13.960 some of them speaking some of them may be hopping on a panel some of them will be guys you recognize

00:12:19.040 who won't actually be speaking at the conference but just plan to be there so you should plan to

00:12:24.180 be there too it's going to sell out very quickly right now we have the early bird rate okay so this

00:12:30.620 is your chance to get a ticket for the conference as as cheaply as possible but the rate will be

00:12:37.660 going up soon we're not going to do it in terms of setting a time we're going to do it we will let

00:12:43.480 you know hey at this time we're going to stop it but we're going to base that off of registrations

00:12:47.520 it's very likely that we'll have another couple hundred registrations within a matter of days

00:12:53.260 again it's not because we're awesome it's not because we're novel but it's because the world

00:12:59.400 lost its mind over the last few years the world has been losing its mind for decades to be fair

00:13:07.540 but over the last three years whether it be the branch covidians or the summer of love and blm

00:13:14.260 riots or transing kids or whatever you fill in the blank we're living currently in clown world

00:13:21.880 And so, yeah, a lot of Christians are considering perhaps it might be worth at least just giving a shot to the idea that God might have a standard. 0.68

00:13:32.680 It's not whether, but which. Maybe God has a standard. Maybe his law is actually still good.

00:13:38.480 Maybe we should have a Christian nation and Christian government.

00:13:42.780 Maybe we should apply all of Christ for all of life, and maybe, just maybe, God might be so merciful and kind that it would be successful.

00:13:53.420 That it's not only our marching orders in terms of what obedience looks like, but maybe obedience might actually work.

00:14:01.400 Maybe we're not just shining brass, polishing brass on a sinking ship, just rearranging the deck chairs on top of the Titanic.

00:14:11.320 Maybe God has not ordained for everything to spiral down into oblivion and then Jesus comes and he's going to come next Thursday.

00:14:20.560 What if Jesus tarried for another 500 years?

00:14:24.400 What if he tarried for another 5,000 years?

00:14:26.900 And what if it was actually God's decree, his plan, that the leaven would work through the whole batch of dough?

00:14:34.740 That the mustard seed would grow into a great tree?

00:14:38.060 that the stone cut by no human hands would actually grow into a mountain that fills the

00:14:44.620 whole earth? What if Christ's victory, his kingdom, is meant by God to progressively advance and grow

00:14:51.980 throughout all the earth in real human history through the battering ram of the church as the

00:14:59.960 tip of the spear? People are considering these things. The last few years of clown world has

00:15:05.700 forced many christians to consider these things and these are the things that our ministry right

00:15:11.800 response and other like-minded ministries like brian and doug and joe are committed to addressing

00:15:18.740 so go to right response conference.com and register for both of these conferences today

00:15:24.860 the last thing that i want to say then i'll get into our topic i've just officially published my

00:15:30.100 book fight by flight why leaving godless places is loving godless places again that's fight by flight

00:15:39.140 why leaving godless places is loving godless places essentially what i'm arguing the book

00:15:46.440 is that christians should prayerfully and seriously consider moving to a more defensible position and

00:15:55.480 And I mean not just in the spiritual sense or the abstract, but literally, physically, geographically moving out of godless progressive cities, godless progressive states, godless progressive countries even.

00:16:10.980 We have a couple families from Canada that are now in our church all the way down in central Texas, and we are honored to have them with us.

00:16:19.820 I think this is another thing that Christians are considering after the last three years 1.00

00:16:24.620 of cultural insanity. 1.00

00:16:27.620 Do I want to raise my kids in a state like New York or a state like California?

00:16:33.180 So, you know, the time old question has always been, is it, you know, fight or flight?

00:16:40.500 Basically, my premise in this book is that I argue that there is a third option, that

00:16:45.100 it's not just stay in a godless place and fight or flee and retreat and surrender but that you can

00:16:53.500 actually fight by flight that by fleeing we can actually fight some of the progressive ideologies

00:17:00.620 and policies that that we so detest as christians who love god's word the book is forwarded by

00:17:08.640 Douglas Wilson. It's been endorsed by individuals such as Steve Dace from The Blaze TV, Michael

00:17:15.240 Foster, who's the author of It's Good to Be a Man, Megan Basham from The Daily Wire. The book I think

00:17:22.080 is very simple. It's short, it's sweet, but it's helpful in creating a theological category for

00:17:30.180 faithful Christians to be able to relocate their family for the good of their children, for the

00:17:36.540 good of their vocation. For all those purposes, in order to try to be obedient to God, it provides

00:17:42.840 this theological category outside of merely the category of surrender. A lot of Christians,

00:17:49.620 that's pretty much the only categories they have. Either stay and go down with the ship, 1.00

00:17:54.160 or quit. And so what I'm arguing is that there's actually a way where a retreat can be temporary,

00:18:01.240 it can be tactical and it can be strategic and a retreat like that in christian terms

00:18:08.740 is actually merely an advance to the rear advancing to the rear no real retreat but

00:18:15.360 strategically running not from a battle but to a battle a battle that is both winnable and it is

00:18:23.680 significant it's a battle worth winning and a battle that can actually be won all right the

00:18:30.260 war is going to have many battles across the world over the course of centuries as we seek

00:18:35.520 to push for the crown rights of king jesus but there are some battles that set the course for

00:18:41.740 the world this war that we're in the battles such as you know you think historically the battle of

00:18:47.600 bunker's hill right it may not have even been the biggest battle necessarily but it was strategic

00:18:54.640 And right now we need recruitments in places that are both winnable, but also significant

00:19:01.840 if they could be won.

00:19:03.360 We're not talking about leaving a place like New York or California or Canada or New Zealand

00:19:08.560 forever.

00:19:10.200 We're talking about leaving these godless places strategically, momentarily, so that

00:19:17.020 they can actually lie in the bed that they've been making.

00:19:20.060 so that christians are no longer propping these godless ideologies and policies up by their hard

00:19:27.280 earned tax dollars that we actually would force someone like gavin newsom to take a spoonful of

00:19:33.780 his own medicine so we're not leaving one fight to go and retreat in safety we're leaving one

00:19:40.840 fight to go to another fight and in leaving the one fight that might be one of the ways that we

00:19:47.580 actually win that fight also. That's the premise of the book. Go and check it out. You can get it

00:19:53.220 on Amazon or you can go to rightresponseministries.com. We have a lower price than Amazon

00:20:00.020 that we wanted to make available to you. So go to rightresponseministries.com, click on our store.

00:20:07.160 It should be on the very first page, Fight by Flight, Why Leaving Godless Places is Loving

00:20:12.700 godless places. Check out the book today. All right, let's go ahead and hop into our topic for

00:20:18.440 this afternoon. The topic that we want to address is biblical patriarchy and particularly the

00:20:26.940 jurisdiction, the degree of authority that a man has in his own home, the degree of authority

00:20:34.580 that a husband has with his wife in his marriage and that a father has when it comes to his

00:20:41.740 children that's the topic i have some things that i think are vital for you to hear as we discuss

00:20:47.760 biblical patriarchy we also we did a poll recently and it seems like a lot of you really want me to

00:20:53.460 get into covenant theology so my plan is to address covenant theology next week but for today we're

00:21:00.140 going to address biblical patriarchy and i promise i'll hop into it without any more delays right

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00:22:28.900 All right, so I recently preached a sermon at the church that I pastor, Covenant Bible Church,

00:22:34.920 about 45 minutes north of Austin. Again, if you're looking for a good church, check out

00:22:38.940 covenantbible.org. I recently preached a sermon just a few weeks ago, and there was a particular

00:22:45.100 portion of the sermon that people had a visceral reaction to and what i was addressing is the

00:22:54.020 degrees of authority and jurisdiction of authority in the three primary spheres sovereign spheres

00:23:01.980 that god has that god has ordained so the talking about the home the church and the state these

00:23:10.260 divinely instituted spheres of government now all of these are government technically from a biblical

00:23:17.260 perspective we could say that there are four governments there is self-government which we

00:23:22.360 see exemplified in the scripture if in no other place simply in the fruit of the spirit that is

00:23:28.120 self-control we are all called to be good righteous christian governors of self right to

00:23:35.800 exercise stewardship over ourself our actions our deeds our words our spiritual health physical

00:23:43.420 health on and on and on so self-government and we have the familial government the family is

00:23:50.340 a form of government it is a sphere of government then we have ecclesiastical government that is

00:23:57.220 the church and then we have civil government that is the state now in each of these governments

00:24:03.640 there are varying degrees of authority and the larger point that i was making in this portion

00:24:09.440 of my sermon is that i was saying starting with the civil realm starting with the state

00:24:15.620 you have civil fathers and i do hold to biblical patriarchy patriarchy simply meaning father rule

00:24:23.100 father rule i believe that this is god's design and that it is not god's design merely for the

00:24:28.860 home in the church but it is god's design for all of human society that society as a whole

00:24:35.140 even outside of the family and the church even in the civil realm the state that society would be

00:24:42.120 led by godly men led by godly men so civil fathers in the realm of the state in terms of the scope

00:24:52.760 of their governmental authority, that scope is wide. It encompasses every single person

00:25:00.980 within the country. If we're talking about federal officials, civil magistrates, if we're talking

00:25:07.500 about the president of the United States, then he has a certain degree, very limited, but a certain

00:25:14.000 degree of authority over 330 million people. His authority is a mile wide, we might say,

00:25:22.780 but about an inch deep. The depth or degree of his authority is very small, very limited. Now,

00:25:32.240 it's important to say this, all human authority is vested authority, meaning there is no such thing

00:25:39.740 is human authority being inherent authority. It's all been given by God and human beings are merely

00:25:48.580 charged by God to steward that authority. It's not inherent to us. It is not innate. So, no human

00:25:56.600 being has limitless authority. And so too, starting with civil fathers in the realm of the state,

00:26:05.280 they have very limited degree of authority but in terms of the people they're in authority over

00:26:13.120 it's a much wider scope so so the breadth of their authority is wide but the depth degree

00:26:20.060 of their authority is shallow okay ecclesiastical fathers speaking of the divine instituted sphere

00:26:28.960 of the church now they have a larger degree of authority but a smaller scope as a local pastor

00:26:37.360 i have a certain measure of authority the jurisdictions have been set for me in scripture

00:26:43.420 i don't have limitless authority it's very defined and very limited but not as limited as

00:26:50.180 civil authority so civil authority is the widest it contains the largest scope of authority but

00:26:58.880 it is the shallowest right it's the smallest degree of authority ecclesiastical fathers

00:27:05.220 predominantly elders but also deacons which i do believe deacons should be male i hold to a male

00:27:11.180 diaconate that's the westminster position and the 1689 position anyone within the confessionally

00:27:17.720 reformed tradition has held for approximately 500 years now that both pastors and deacons should be

00:27:25.980 male. This is not a crazy position. This is the historic position that the church has held

00:27:32.100 for a very, very long time. I say 500 years because I was speaking particularly about the

00:27:38.280 Reformed tradition, but really this is the tradition even outside of Reformed theology,

00:27:42.560 stretching all the way back to the first century church. 2,000 years, we see that deacons are

00:27:48.680 called to be men so ecclesiastical fathers predominantly elders but as viceroys or deputies

00:27:56.620 you might say to a lesser degree male deacons as well they are the ecclesiastical fathers in the

00:28:03.380 realm of the church and they have a deeper authority right a larger degree of authority

00:28:10.380 but a much smaller scope of authority they have authority in my case over you know about 200

00:28:18.240 people in my church we by God's grace planted in April 2021 the church has been going for just a

00:28:24.900 little over two years now we've gone from 20 people to 200 people in those two years all by

00:28:30.480 the grace of God but the church is still relatively small and so the scope of my authority is

00:28:36.780 relatively small whereas the degree of my authority is very limited very specific but I would argue

00:28:44.640 that it's a greater degree of authority as a pastor over his church than for instance the

00:28:50.560 president of the united states over a country okay lastly the home the sphere of the home this

00:28:59.780 would be familial fathers the husband has a much smaller husband slash father has a much smaller

00:29:08.900 scope of authority. As a husband and father, I have authority over five people, my wife and then

00:29:15.860 my four children. So there are only five people within the realm of my authority as a husband

00:29:22.160 and father, familial father in the sphere of the home. But the degree of authority that I have

00:29:29.000 in this realm is far, far deeper. It's a much greater degree of authority than the authority

00:29:36.660 I have as a local pastor in the realm of the church. I have much greater authority in regards

00:29:43.020 to the relationship that I have toward my wife than I do in the relationship I have towards a

00:29:49.100 congregant. I have even greater authority in regards to my position as a father with my children

00:29:56.060 than I do as a husband with my wife. And in this particular sermon a few weeks ago,

00:30:02.480 i gave examples right that's the context i was arguing about degrees of authority in various

00:30:08.760 spheres of government wider scope to working down to a more limited scope and shallow shallower

00:30:16.640 degree or depth of authority getting deeper as we work from the civil realm to the ecclesiastical

00:30:23.940 realm to the familial realm the home now one of the examples that i used with children as i said

00:30:31.700 when it comes to being a father in your home and your authority over your children it is almost

00:30:39.160 it is virtually limitless authority now even there clearly the father has limits all authority

00:30:47.720 is vested authority it's designated by God it's not inherent to any human man and so there are

00:30:56.300 still limits for a father and the authority he has for his children but the degree of authority

00:31:01.500 that he has in that context is great and i gave some examples i said that a father can dictate

00:31:08.620 the wardrobe of his children a father can dictate and decide the diet what food the family is going

00:31:18.180 to be eating even when the children need to go to the bathroom now some people lost their ever

00:31:25.560 loving minds on that last point and let me clarify my church was laughing as i'm preaching this

00:31:32.860 laughing with me not at me because they know me and they know my family now of course it was my

00:31:40.680 decision i take responsibility for it and i really don't regret it but i chose to make this portion

00:31:46.960 of my sermon available on the world wide web where many people do not know me and they do not know

00:31:53.000 my family so for those of you who don't know the ages of my four children is five three two

00:32:02.660 and eight months so when i said that a father as a father speaking of myself in my sermon

00:32:09.980 i have authority over when my children go to the bathroom i was not talking about a 16 year old

00:32:16.520 teenage daughter my oldest is five i'm talking about um i'm talking about talking to your two

00:32:25.100 year old in my case a two-year-old and a three-year-old and saying sweetheart did you go

00:32:31.680 potty no dad no dada you need to go potty it's bedtime we got our jammies on and you will not

00:32:40.640 be able to hold it all night long you have not gone potty since before nap time which was

00:32:46.080 approximately six hours ago we need to go potty before we go to bed right i'm telling a child

00:32:52.440 in that instance my child when to go to the bathroom now here's the funny thing people you

00:32:58.360 know reacted saying this is tyrannical this is authoritative um the irony is i want to meet

00:33:05.840 all these abusive parents because this would actually be more accurate as an example of abuse

00:33:11.660 i want to meet all the abusive parents who are responsible for the epidemic of bedwetting that

00:33:18.040 we must be experiencing all around the world because apparently we have a bunch of parents

00:33:23.780 that won't tell their two-year-old or three-year-old to go to the bathroom before bed and i guarantee

00:33:30.240 you as a parent with experience if you're not willing to tell a child of that age you need to

00:33:37.360 go potty then what you have is well you you pretty much are changing the sheets every single morning

00:33:44.460 so uh the fact that that was viewed as extreme um is well i i i'll go ahead and chalk that one

00:33:53.660 up in defense of my hearers to just maybe they just didn't know the ages of my children

00:33:59.480 maybe they just didn't know the point that i was trying to convey now knowing the ages of my

00:34:06.740 children, if you still hold to that position, uh, that a father does not have the authority to tell

00:34:12.980 his two and three year old that they need to go potty before bedtime. Um, then I, I guess I would

00:34:21.760 just have to suspect not even that you're a liberal or progressive, but you're just probably

00:34:26.300 not a parent. You just probably don't have kids. And so I would just suggest maybe sit the bench

00:34:33.340 and you know i think the world will do just fine without your two cents on this particular issue

00:34:39.600 all right that's that now what about a husband with his wife right so father with his children

00:34:46.360 it's a great degree of authority um over over this is what we're going to wear their mother and i we

00:34:53.080 will set out their clothing you know this is the outfit we're going to wear today right and of

00:34:58.480 course we make the decision of of what clothing we're going to purchase for our children so we

00:35:04.260 decide what what is contained in their wardrobe and what outfit they're going to wear that day

00:35:09.540 it's a lot of authority what time they're going to go to bed when is bedtime that is an authority

00:35:15.180 that again remember the larger context of the point that i was making the civil magistrate

00:35:20.180 does not have that authority right a governor or congress or city council does not get to tell us

00:35:29.660 when to go potty they do not get to tell us what outfit to wear on a particular day that's not an

00:35:37.780 authority that's been given to them so remember keep in mind here my larger principle talking

00:35:42.480 about there are four primary spheres of government self-government family government church government

00:35:49.980 state government. And each of these fears, as we move from the self outward, from self to family,

00:35:56.380 to church, to government, the scope of authority gets wider, but the depth of authority gets

00:36:02.880 shallower. That's the principle. Okay. And all this builds up to a final point that I'll make

00:36:08.520 here in just a moment. But what about a husband in regards to his wife? Now, the example that I gave

00:36:13.880 when I was talking about a husband's authority with his wife, the particular example I gave was

00:36:18.980 this. I said that a husband has a degree of authority, even regards to what books his wife

00:36:27.520 might read. And I talked about the danger of certain women's Bible studies. And I stand by 1.00

00:36:34.360 this 100%. I have seen many Christian marriages fracture because the woman is participating in 1.00

00:36:43.100 what's being presented as a bible study but it's only for women and they're utilizing certain 0.94

00:36:49.640 materials and books and curriculum also written by women but the women who have provided these

00:36:56.360 materials are not sound in the faith and things get wacky they get wacky i don't know if you guys 1.00

00:37:05.440 remember this it was a while back but i remember there was a lot of pushback and rightfully so 0.86

00:37:10.260 when jen wilkin teaching women in a women's only context right so titus 2 women training women 0.76

00:37:19.660 right older women training younger women she's teaching and she was teaching about penal

00:37:24.360 substitutionary atonement she was talking about the blood of jesus atoning for sins and she said

00:37:31.940 that women are uniquely or especially able to relate to Christ

00:37:39.400 in his blood sacrifice, atoning for sins, 1.00

00:37:42.460 because women bleed. 1.00

00:37:46.120 And they bleed on that special time of the month.

00:37:52.440 That is an atrocious handling of Scripture.

00:37:57.120 I didn't say this.

00:37:58.620 i'm merely repeating for you what a and the reason why i use jen wilkin is because

00:38:05.200 she has been presented and viewed perceived by many within evangelicalism as someone who's

00:38:13.280 complementarian somebody who's biblically conservative right i i of course i could

00:38:19.960 give you examples of joyce meyer paula white i could give you a lot of examples of beth moore 0.83

00:38:27.300 things that have been taught that are not doctrinally sound that are ridiculous and

00:38:31.880 laughable i choose to use jen wilkin not because she's the worst but i'm trying to make an argument

00:38:38.680 from the greater to the lesser right i don't want to just straw man my the the opposition to my view

00:38:46.140 i want to steal man i i want to say even in and some of the better cases of women's ministries

00:38:55.080 you still have it seems like a tendency for women to teach some wacky things now here's the deal

00:39:05.160 and this gets into another subject that's important but i'll probably have to flesh out

00:39:09.680 another time i believe titus 2 i believe that older women should train younger women but i

00:39:16.720 don't necessarily think that we need to have women's only conferences taught by only women

00:39:23.800 for theology proper and doctrine of god why well because women don't need to know about the 0.53

00:39:32.260 hypostatic union and the trinity no of course they do of course they do that is not the position of

00:39:39.960 patriarchy biblical patriarchy does not insist or even suggest that women should not learn theology

00:39:48.260 in fact we would say not only is it permissible but it is commanded by scripture first timothy

00:39:57.220 chapter 2 verse 9 a woman must learn not just that a woman is permitted to learn and you have

00:40:04.820 to keep in mind this is culturally it is radical for the time the apostle paul underneath the

00:40:11.240 inspiration of the holy spirit is not only saying that that the door is now open that women can be

00:40:17.440 educated now that it's permissible for women to learn about doctrine alongside their husbands

00:40:23.160 and fathers and brothers but paul actually uses the word must a woman must learn then he begins

00:40:30.860 to address how that she should learn in quietness and full submission i do not permit i don't allow 0.85

00:40:38.900 a woman to teach or exercise authority over a man so women are not permitted to teach men

00:40:45.040 but women must learn and here's the implication from the text they must learn from men so we don't

00:40:55.080 want women only learning about how to make sourdough that said my wife makes amazing

00:41:02.720 sourdough and she teaches other women how to make sourdough and it's glorious it's biblical 0.52

00:41:08.160 it's Christ-exalting, and it's great. It's great. But that is not all my wife is learning. My wife

00:41:16.100 is reading serious theological books. My wife is listening to serious theological lectures.

00:41:24.300 My wife is learning theology, and not just theology of sourdough, although that is a real

00:41:30.080 thing, all of Christ for all of life. It's real, the theology of sourdough, but that is not all

00:41:37.560 my wife is learning so the biblical patriarchal position not only allows or permits but insists

00:41:44.140 that women should learn but when it comes to who teaches some of these things like who should be

00:41:51.280 teaching a 14 week long course on soteriology or again doctrine of god theology proper the trinity

00:42:00.940 the three persons of god the one divine essence the will of god does the will of god belong to

00:42:06.960 his essence nature or does it belong to his persons does god have three wills because there

00:42:12.940 are three persons in the godhead or one will and what about when jesus says not my will but yours

00:42:19.240 be done is this is because he's the second person of the trinity and he has an individual will the

00:42:25.120 father has an individual will and the spirit has an individual will or is this because as the second

00:42:30.640 member of the trinity who took on flesh he has two natures and that will is belonging to essence

00:42:36.240 and nature and so he shares one divine will with the father and the spirit in his divinity but in

00:42:43.200 his second nature his humanity there is a human will that is fully submitted to the divine will

00:42:49.100 but is also distinct right that's some doctrine for you there's some deep doctrine um who should

00:42:57.440 teach that predominantly this is not a hard and fast rule i don't want to be overly legalistic

00:43:04.920 about this but predominantly men and women not only may learn these things but must learn these

00:43:12.620 things but they should learn them together and the primary context where they learn them is at church

00:43:18.880 with a faithful weekend and week out expositional preaching of god's word by biblically qualified

00:43:27.520 pastors who according to scripture are men are men so titus 2 older women training younger women

00:43:36.720 let me just go to that text because this is a concept that's very simple it's not complicated

00:43:43.100 it's not difficult but it is apparently aggravating for many or annoying or just not liked so this is

00:43:53.940 Titus chapter two, verse three, older women likewise are to be reverent in behavior, not

00:43:59.820 slanderers or slaves to much wine. They are to teach what is good. And I think a lot of our

00:44:07.840 sisters in Christ and certain brothers in Christ would stop right there. But in the text, we have

00:44:15.340 not a period and an end of chapter, end of letter, end of book, but a comma. It goes now into verse

00:44:21.980 And so train the young women to love their husbands and children, to be self-controlled, pure, keepers of home, workers at home, kind and submissive to their own husbands, that the word of God may not be reviled.

00:44:43.260 i am of the position and i believe when titus 2 says older women should train younger women

00:44:51.900 by teaching them what is good that that good is not an ambiguous abstract good and then all of a

00:45:01.540 sudden the author of scripture is now just changing subjects and begins to get on a whole new train of

00:45:09.640 thought no i i think that the good the good that older women are commanded in scripture to teach

00:45:17.060 younger women is then defined it's described it's fleshed out so so what is the biblical command

00:45:26.180 well we know from referencing other texts like first sympathy chapter 2 verses 9 through 15

00:45:32.300 women are not permitted to teach men however according to titus chapter 2 verses 3 through

00:45:39.600 five older women are permitted and even insisted upon to teach not men but younger women but the

00:45:48.700 text doesn't just say that they can teach women that women can teach women it tells us what they

00:45:55.900 are to teach they are to teach the good and it describes for us that good that is in reference

00:46:04.600 what is the good teach what is good and so train the young women to love their husbands and children 0.80

00:46:12.020 to be self-controlled pure working at home kind and submissive to their own husbands that the 0.93

00:46:19.120 word of god not be reviled now just like the fruit of the spirit and galatians or just like

00:46:26.360 the list of qualifications for deacons and elders in first timothy chapter 3 and titus chapter 1

00:46:33.160 I don't believe that that list is an exhaustive list, comprehensive.

00:46:38.760 I believe that there are plenty of other things that we could put on that list that the Apostle

00:46:43.580 Paul would nod his head in full agreement with.

00:46:47.820 But I think that what Paul chooses to list there in Titus chapter 2 that he uses to describe

00:46:54.420 what is this particular good that older women should be training younger women in, I think

00:47:00.180 that that list is not random.

00:47:02.120 Exhaustive?

00:47:02.800 No.

00:47:03.160 but also random arbitrary likewise no it's it's getting on to something it's describing something

00:47:13.560 these are in many many cases these are things pertaining to a woman's role as wife and mother

00:47:21.820 these are biblically domestic things domestic roles domestic virtues how to submit to your

00:47:32.240 husband how to be a lover of your husband and lover of your children how to work diligently

00:47:38.600 at home how to be self-controlled how to be pure we might insert modesty right there not that men

00:47:48.240 are incapable of being immodest certainly men can be immodest as well but i do believe that that is

00:47:55.360 a particular especially in our culture today but i think throughout all time and all history and

00:48:00.820 all places, that there are some sins that women gravitate towards more than men and vice versa.

00:48:07.320 There are certain strengths that men have that women don't. And there are certain weaknesses

00:48:13.380 that men have that women don't. And on the flip side, there are certain sins that men are somewhat 0.56

00:48:19.360 tempted with, but women are more tempted with. I think gossip would be an example. Men can gossip. 0.81

00:48:27.200 i have gossiped but women in general right now i'm speaking in general terms and people really

00:48:34.460 struggle with speaking in general terms is there one woman on the planet who can out bench press

00:48:41.180 one man on the planet yes in general are men physically stronger than women also yes you see

00:48:49.600 what i did there it's not hard we can do this okay likewise do i believe that women have a

00:48:57.340 higher propensity in general across the board towards the sin of gossip than men yes the sin

00:49:04.000 of immodesty than men yes also being deceived are women more likely to be deceived yes and this is

00:49:15.360 throughout church history this is the universally held position it is not until really the last

00:49:20.900 hundred years really less than that in the last 50 to 70 years that that the church has thought

00:49:28.540 that when peter says that the wife is a weaker vessel that that that that is strictly in the

00:49:35.500 physical sense that she is physically weaker than her husband first timothy chapter two again verses

00:49:43.020 9 through 15. One of the reasons that Paul cites for why a woman is not permitted to teach over a 0.82

00:49:49.580 man is the created order. Adam is formed first, then woman. Woman is formed from man. Adam's made 0.98

00:49:57.520 from the dust of the ground. The woman is formed from the rib of Adam. So from, made from man and 1.00

00:50:02.600 for man as his help meat. So we have the created order. We have the purpose and design of women, 0.91

00:50:08.900 But also, the Apostle Paul goes on not just to describe creation, but he also describes the fall. 0.92

00:50:15.520 And in describing the fall, he says,

00:50:17.240 For it was not the man who was deceived and became a sinner, but rather the woman who was deceived.

00:50:23.400 Now, Adam bears more responsibility by virtue of his position as federal head,

00:50:30.340 representing all of creation and certainly his wife Eve.

00:50:33.560 he's also more culpable morally responsible for his sin because he sinned with his eyes wide open

00:50:40.260 Adam knew that it was sin whereas Eve was deceived and Paul cites this here's the thing it's not just

00:50:48.820 one isolated narrative in the book of Genesis if that's all it was okay but the apostle Paul

00:50:56.520 cites it as a reasoning for why women should not teach or exercise authority over men he says

00:51:04.320 the woman was deceived and again this has been a universe the lion's share of of of church history

00:51:12.880 has held that that is one element that peter probably has in mind when he says that the wife

00:51:19.640 is a weaker vessel that part of what he probably has in mind is that she is more susceptible

00:51:26.180 towards deception and that would include doctrinal deception and that's part of the reason why women

00:51:34.540 should not lead we also find within the old testament prophets that that one of the signs 0.99

00:51:41.480 of god's judgment over a nation is when they are led by women and children again can we find one 0.89

00:51:51.140 woman that's better than one man absolutely we live in a fallen world um if if if we have you

00:51:59.380 know two candidates running for the presidency and one is um an abolitionist and an evangelical

00:52:07.180 christian and she's a woman and the other is joe biden and he's a man barely albeit but a man

00:52:17.120 i'm voting for that woman of course i am i'm not an ideologue see part of the reason we can't talk

00:52:24.740 about biblical patriarchy and i'll confess this is because some of the men usually young single

00:52:30.960 men on our side of the position um they they're not the best way to describe them is they're not

00:52:37.760 serious people they're not serious people they're not really interested in winning and they're not

00:52:45.340 really interested in persuading others to be convinced of of the biblical position they just

00:52:53.660 they just like to get a rise out of people they they just they're like they're like real life

00:53:00.260 trolls not just on twitter but but in in their in their personal discourse in real life flesh

00:53:06.520 and blood they just they're like a living troll and and and so they're not serious people

00:53:11.020 so all that being said in the real world for serious people serious men and women 0.68

00:53:17.800 yeah we're going to vote for a christian god-fearing woman over a godless progressive

00:53:24.420 demonic man but again in general we need to be able to do this guys we can speak in generalities

00:53:31.460 in general men are called to lead and i believe within the biblical patriarchal position that

00:53:38.940 this is not exclusively confined merely to the realm of the home and the church but that it

00:53:45.220 extends beyond that even in the civil realm as well that we should have kings rather than queens

00:53:52.420 all things being equal in general kings not queens you should have congressmen rather than congress

00:54:01.820 women and i do believe that this is a biblical principle that men are called to lead and not

00:54:08.880 just in one sphere but then that immediately being contradicted with their wife now taking a

00:54:15.280 position of authority over them as soon as you move to another sphere think about that think

00:54:20.800 about how confusing it is for complementarians many that are faithful biblical christians

00:54:28.320 evangelicals in our society today where they believe that the husband is the head of his wife

00:54:32.820 in the home but then they step outside their front door and all of a sudden the wife in this 0.59

00:54:39.540 next sphere has authority over her husband right she's the ceo of some company and he's an employee

00:54:45.660 or she's you know she's a councilwoman and he's a citizen or whatever it may be

00:54:52.020 if husbands in the sphere of the family the family being the the smallest building block

00:54:58.840 of society as a whole that's all society is is it's simply society is simply the the sum of

00:55:06.320 multiple families if the husband is called to be the head of the family then wouldn't it makes

00:55:14.000 sense that in keeping with that biblical pattern of patriarchy father rule male headship ruling

00:55:21.380 righteously that that men would lead if they're called to lead in the home and explicitly commanded

00:55:28.000 to lead in the church wouldn't it make sense if they also were called to lead in society

00:55:33.720 of course it makes sense and that's what we've done for approximately 1900 years this is a

00:55:42.060 question you have to seriously ask yourself do you think that the reason why these things are

00:55:49.080 are so strongly objected to today do you think that it has more to do with the fact that for

00:55:57.500 the first time in 2000 years of church history, we have competent biblical exegetes, right? That

00:56:05.380 throughout all of church history until about a hundred years ago, that no one was really

00:56:12.680 competent enough to exegete scripture, but now we can, right? Is that more likely? Or here's just

00:56:21.660 a possible alternative just for your humble consideration is it possible that instead of us

00:56:28.760 now finally having for the first time ever in 2000 years biblically competent exegetes instead

00:56:36.440 we have feminists and that our society is drenched in feminism and that feminist culture has seeped

00:56:46.840 into our churches is that possible what's more likely for the first time we have sound biblical

00:56:54.140 exegesis or in a very unique sense we have a culture and society and even churches dominated

00:57:04.180 by feminism i think that it's the latter i think it's the latter so biblical patriarchy and how it

00:57:12.600 would differ from complementarianism at least in one sense one simple way to describe that there

00:57:18.860 are other elements as well but one simple way to describe that is that patriarchy believes that

00:57:24.460 father rules the design across the board whereas complementarianism it seeks to isolate male

00:57:32.460 headship exclusively to the realm of the family and the church and then when you get out of that 0.93

00:57:39.400 and step into society all bets are off right so there's no problem with women ruling over men 0.93

00:57:46.960 in the civil realm you just got to have male elders and the husband's the head of his wife 0.89

00:57:53.920 and what does it mean for the husband to be the head of his wife going back to my sermon and giving 0.51

00:57:58.260 examples of authority well what it means is that they decide everything together and maybe over

00:58:03.920 the course of a healthy marriage, 40 years, 50 years, however long it is that they're married

00:58:10.040 until the death do them part, they, you know, just can't agree on a particular issue. And so in that

00:58:17.100 case, when they can't agree, they go and seek biblical counsel outside of the marriage by

00:58:21.180 meeting with their pastors. And if the biblical counselors don't side with the wife over the

00:58:26.420 husband or the husband over the wife, and they spend time fasting and praying and getting counsel

00:58:32.300 and all these things, and it still comes up a wash, it's still just 50-50, we could go either

00:58:37.660 way, and we're not persuaded, we still disagree, then in that case, and only that case, the husband

00:58:42.740 and being head over the wife gets to make the decision. For a lot of complementarians, that's

00:58:49.240 what the authority of a husband in the home looks like. Another way to put it is it looks like having

00:58:54.400 no authority. What does the authority of a husband in the home look like? It looks like no authority.

00:59:00.260 and that's part of the reason why me and other men are objecting to complementarianism and saying

00:59:08.060 i don't know if we like this i don't know if this is biblical i and and we're even kind of starting

00:59:14.480 to back away from the term and saying we already had a term it's a good term it's a term that has

00:59:21.600 historical origins it doesn't just go back to 15 minutes ago with wayne grudem and john piper god

00:59:27.380 bless them but it's it's a long held term patriarchy it's a good word and it means something

00:59:36.720 it means something so biblical patriarchy not just a tiny fraction of authority in the home

00:59:43.960 in the church and then no male authority anywhere else but rather real authority in the home to a

00:59:49.380 lesser degree still real authority in the church and to an even lesser degree real authority in

00:59:55.440 society and male headship across the board, not just the home and the church, but in the civil

01:00:02.220 realm as well. That's biblical patriarchy in a nutshell. So going back to the illustration that

01:00:08.100 I provided in my sermon or not illustration, but example, um, my wife, she was reading a book.

01:00:15.840 That's probably about six years ago. And, and that shocked me because I don't like women being able 1.00

01:00:21.380 to read. No, I'm just kidding. She was reading a book and the book was about pedo-baptism. 1.00

01:00:28.400 And now to set the context again, as I'm saying this, my congregation is laughing,

01:00:33.820 right? Because we get it. Now, again, it's on me. When you make something publicly available

01:00:38.600 to the world wide web, then you're going to have a lot of people who are watching that don't know

01:00:41.880 the context and that's fine. So that's on me. I can't blame anybody with that, but the people

01:00:46.100 in my congregation are laughing because it's kind of been a longstanding joke. You know,

01:00:49.320 well, Joel's, you know, basically Presbyterian. He's going to become a Presbyterian, blah, blah,

01:00:53.300 blah. At this point in my ministry, I, you know, I, I partner with more Presbyterians than I do

01:00:58.300 Baptists. And, and so it's kind of been a running joke for, you know, me, my wife, my family, my

01:01:03.640 congregation. And so I said, you know, I walked in the house, I had finished work in my studio.

01:01:08.860 I walked in the house and I saw my, my wife reading a book about pedo-baptism. And I said,

01:01:13.260 no you're not reading that put that down all right we will read that together sometime it may be a

01:01:22.160 while because i'm busy right now but eventually i'll get to it and we'll read it together but

01:01:26.280 you're not going to become a paedo baptist three years before i do and that's what i said my

01:01:32.880 congregation is laughing my wife is smiling and laughing my kids again five three two and zero

01:01:38.760 they don't really know what's going on but people are laughing next to them so they're laughing

01:01:41.960 um we get it it's not crazy there's some of the context for you but a lot of people who watch this

01:01:48.960 on the internet now again in their defense they don't know the backstory about how joel's kind

01:01:53.520 of been flirting with presbyterianism for multiple years now and blah blah blah um but still even

01:02:00.000 without the context that should not have been a shocking example think about this for a second

01:02:06.420 i'm a reformed credo baptist pastor and as a baptist pastor of currently what is a baptist

01:02:16.660 church reformed baptist church that holds to the credo baptist position that i don't want my wife

01:02:23.640 to read a book that is designed this particular book is is a book it's about a conversation

01:02:30.540 between a paedo-baptist and a credo-baptist where the paedo-baptist wins the credo-baptist over and

01:02:36.680 it's it's like letters like discourse going back and forth them debating and the whole book the

01:02:40.780 whole purpose of the book and this isn't malicious or bad it's fine of course we want to persuade

01:02:45.180 people of our position but the person who put this book together their purpose is to persuade

01:02:49.520 credo-baptist to become paedo-baptist and so a reformed baptist credo-baptist pastor not just

01:02:55.620 Christian man, but a pastor, I pastor a Baptist church, doesn't want the pastor's wife in

01:03:03.300 a Baptist church for her to have her conscience bound, right?

01:03:09.260 Because that's what happens when we read persuasive things, is it not always, but often

01:03:14.200 we get persuaded and in being persuaded in Christian terms, what that is, is your conscience

01:03:18.880 being bound.

01:03:19.920 Now, now think about that for a moment.

01:03:21.420 Just, just play it out, right?

01:03:23.180 This is not hard.

01:03:24.280 just play it out you have you have the senior pastor of a baptist church who holds to a credo

01:03:31.640 baptist position and his wife now is convinced of the paedo baptist position and her conscience

01:03:39.600 has been bound through biblical arguments made in a book that she read about paedo baptism

01:03:44.700 and so she now actually thinks she loves her husband still respects her husband but she cannot

01:03:50.340 help but think that at least in this one particular area her husband is in sin her husband's in sin

01:03:56.780 right because we're not relativist remember guys let me frame this up for you we're not relativist

01:04:02.060 right both positions are not simultaneously right somebody's right and somebody's wrong

01:04:09.460 so i'm asking you now is it healthy for that marriage as it seeks to be unified and for the

01:04:19.200 church and the congregation as a whole, is it healthy for the wife of a senior pastor in a

01:04:26.480 Baptist church to be convinced and have her conscience bound that pedo-baptism is actually

01:04:33.460 the biblical position and that her church and her husband are currently in sin?

01:04:40.680 Is that helpful?

01:04:41.800 so what if the husband walks in the door and says uh-uh and he says it with with a jolly

01:04:52.060 cheerfulness he's not shouting he's not being totalitarian but with a jolly cheerfulness he

01:04:58.640 says uh-uh i know babe i know you're tempted so am i we've been talking about this in our marriage

01:05:04.280 that maybe we've been wrong about baptism and we're gonna get into the ark but no no no you're

01:05:08.560 not going to you're not going to get a head start on me right and that's one of the things that i

01:05:13.280 said in the sermon i said my wife's not going to outpace me okay but again the context outpace me

01:05:18.320 in what pedo-baptism that's what i was talking about i'm not saying that she can't outpace me

01:05:25.920 in anything of course my wife outpaces me my wife when it comes to the way that she loves our

01:05:34.120 children she will always outpace me i will never stand a snowflake's chance in hell in keeping up

01:05:41.920 with that god-fearing woman in the way that she cares for our children i'm not her peer i can't

01:05:49.360 compete with that you guys you don't know my wife my wife is incredible she is so godly she is so

01:05:59.820 humble that's why there was no objection when i said sweetheart put that book down you're not

01:06:04.940 going to outpace me become a pedo baptist three years before i have time to get into because

01:06:08.880 right now i'm apparently what has been assigned to me is arguing about christian nationalism now

01:06:14.700 some of that's on me but some of it's because baptists really need some help when in the

01:06:18.720 political theological department and so i i'm dealing with all this i just hosted the conference

01:06:24.080 on theonomy and post-millennialism i've got other conference i'm really focusing on eschatology

01:06:28.520 on the goodness of God's law, general equity, theonomy, God's law, and all of Christ being

01:06:33.340 applied to all of life. There's a lot of things on my plate. Now, here's the deal. I'm not saying

01:06:38.080 that I'm never going to get to the baptism issue because it matters. And ultimately, it's really

01:06:42.720 just the fruit of your covenant theology. And ultimately, covenant theology is undergirding

01:06:47.160 all these other things. Covenant theology plays into your eschatology, and it certainly plays

01:06:51.880 into your political theology. So I'm going to get to it. And another thing for the record,

01:06:57.280 here's the irony my wife and i have read several paedo baptist books several right one book that

01:07:04.340 we really enjoy that we've both uh read she's actually in the process of reading it she's

01:07:08.620 reading it on her own and i but i i went ahead and listened to the whole thing on canon plus

01:07:12.220 was our friend uh jared longshore his book the covenant family and the whole thing is arguing

01:07:18.460 for a westminster covenant theology that is paedo baptist and it was a wonderful book my wife has

01:07:25.920 read you know books by Nancy Wilson and Doug Wilson and all the you know all the home books

01:07:31.180 the marriage books and the parenting books and Doug Wilson when he writes a book on parenting

01:07:35.320 he writes it expressly as a paedo-baptist and in his case a paedo-communionist so my wife has read

01:07:43.080 those books with me she's read multiple books in that vein without me half of the books that she's

01:07:50.400 read on that particular subject I don't even know because the heart the bible says in the

01:07:55.680 Proverbs. The man who's married to a good godly wife, the heart of her husband, trust her, confides

01:08:01.840 in her. So I'm not double checking. What's my wife reading? I'm worried. What's she doing here?

01:08:07.240 What's she doing? So most of the books that my wife has read, I don't even know what they are.

01:08:11.860 And I don't care to know what they are because I trust my wife because she's submissive.

01:08:17.340 The reason why I don't have to be concerned about my wife is because my wife is not

01:08:21.540 like many of the individuals who overreacted to my sermon on this particular topic if my wife had

01:08:29.380 that kind of attitude i would be more invested in what she's reading and what's going on but i don't

01:08:36.220 have to be because like the proverbs 31 woman right her husband gives her a sum of money he's

01:08:42.260 the ultimate provider for the family but then she is allowed she's permitted to have control over at

01:08:49.780 least a portion of it for investing. She goes and buys a field. She does that because the husband

01:08:53.780 trusts her, right? She's the viceroy in this little family kingdom. She's the husband's like

01:08:59.660 the sheriff and she's the chief deputy. And that's how it works in my home. My wife is my chief

01:09:06.260 deputy. She is not my peer. We are not equals in terms of authority. We are equals in terms of

01:09:13.500 innate value and dignity and worth. But in terms of hierarchy of authority, there is a hierarchy

01:09:18.840 and I trump her in terms of my position of authority and yet she is esteemed and she is

01:09:26.040 honored with a great deal of control and freedom and authority in the day-to-day business in our

01:09:33.140 home for our home to function smoothly in a healthy fashion she must have authority she does

01:09:40.620 a ton of things she is doing things right now I can only assume with our children that I have

01:09:46.140 no knowledge about and whatever she's doing with our children what i do know is that it's good

01:09:52.060 and that it honors the lord because i married a woman who fears the lord who doesn't have a

01:09:59.680 feminist bone in her body praise god she's humble and so when i walked in the house and said uh

01:10:05.480 sweetheart put down that book we're not reading that you will not outpace me in what pedo-baptism

01:10:11.000 because i'm your husband we want to be aligned doctrinally we don't want to leave room for a

01:10:17.180 foothold of division in our marriage and i also and this matters i happen to pastor a baptist

01:10:23.320 church i'm the pastor of a baptist church and you're the wife of the pastor in a baptist church

01:10:28.100 so if we're going to cross this bridge let's cross it when i'm ready and let's cross it together

01:10:33.540 that's not crazy but it was reacted to by many as though it was crazy and so i'll leave you with

01:10:44.520 this again i pose the question the what i would consider at least at some degree extreme reaction

01:10:53.360 for people who watch this sermon online is it because

01:10:58.680 the example that i gave is a terrible terrible description of totalitarian

01:11:08.940 misogynistic abuse in a home or is it because we have for the first time in 2000 years of church

01:11:18.320 history biblically competent exegetes who finally told us what it actually means for a woman

01:11:25.200 not to teach or have authority over a man or is it because just maybe just maybe

01:11:33.340 because we live in a society and culture and even the evangelical church which is drenched in

01:11:40.940 feminism and that that feminism not saying that everybody who had a negative reaction

01:11:47.640 is a feminist, but that even good, for the most part, in general, good, conservative, biblical,

01:11:55.960 faithful Christian women have still been affected, at least in some measure, in some degree,

01:12:04.260 by feminism to the point where a very reasonable and even lighthearted, half-joking example could

01:12:12.520 be used in a sermon and their immediate interpretation is this is toxic masculinity and

01:12:21.720 abusive yeah we we are swimming in feminism and it's time that we just wake up and call a spade

01:12:31.400 a spade we are swimming in feminism and it affects all of us in some measure myself for the record

01:12:38.960 include it none of us have have been able to swim and live and breathe this atmosphere of feminism

01:12:48.900 that we're affronted with day in and day out and do so unscathed it has shaped us

01:12:58.040 in some measure in some form or fashion it has molded us and influenced us of course it has

01:13:08.900 but again what was the broader point the broader point was sphere sovereignty

01:13:15.080 god's design for different governments in society the scope of these governments and the depth of

01:13:24.320 the authority of these governments how much authority how many people do they have authority

01:13:29.520 over and what degree of authority do they have civil church home self and the whole point in all

01:13:37.980 it was to say that in the home, a man, God works through father rule, male headship across the

01:13:44.600 board. And in the sphere of the home, a man as husband and father has a great deal more authority

01:13:52.040 given to him by God, all vested authority, not inherent, but even given by God, he has a great

01:13:59.320 deal more authority in his home than a magistrate for instance, has in the state. You know, when

01:14:06.820 covid happened it's for those of us who took the right side of the position and were arguing i was

01:14:16.540 arguing in march right not months after the fact in march of 2020 that churches should open i was

01:14:24.240 arguing in march of 2020 that we should not require mass and there were christians and i'm talking

01:14:30.440 about reformed complementarian quasi-conservative christians that were saying that's rebellious to

01:14:39.400 authority that that's rebellious to authority that we should submit to authority now here's

01:14:46.160 the irony those same christians who would say we should submit to the civil authority that tells

01:14:51.560 us to wear a mask those same christians would lose their mind if i said that the familial authority

01:14:58.940 of a man with his wife in his home, if he said that the wife, let's just for instance, as an

01:15:05.160 example, the wife is walking out the front door at 9 a.m. on a Saturday morning and she's walking

01:15:10.840 outside to exercise. She's going to go for a jog through the neighborhood and she's wearing a tight

01:15:15.620 t-shirt and yoga pants. As a husband, my wife would never do this again because she fears the Lord

01:15:21.260 and she's learned about modesty. But if she were to do this, I would stop her at the door and I

01:15:27.520 would say, sweetheart, you are not allowed to go jog around the neighborhood in front of the

01:15:32.780 neighbors on a Saturday morning dressed like that. Because you're not really dressed, what you have

01:15:39.800 is cotton fabric painted on. Let's put on clothes and not paint. And that's what yoga pants are.

01:15:46.980 It is virtually paint. It is absolutely skin tight, nothing hidden whatsoever. And so as a

01:15:54.940 husband, I would say, uh-uh, you're not going to go outside in front of the neighbors dressed like

01:15:59.680 this. This does not honor the Lord. It's not appropriate. And God has appointed me as your

01:16:04.680 husband with a certain degree of authority. And this falls within my purview. Please change and

01:16:10.500 wear something more modest and then enjoy your run. The gospel coalition would lose its mind 1.00

01:16:18.440 with an example like that and yet the same gospel coalition had a couple articles talking about how

01:16:27.680 pastors and individual christians like myself were rebellious for saying that the government

01:16:34.020 doesn't have the authority to tell us to wear masks think about that okay so gospel coalition

01:16:40.020 would say um if caesar in the civil realm says wear a dirty piece of cloth over your face for

01:16:47.460 no scientific reason supported by data whatsoever and do it for two three years

01:16:56.820 and do it at church even right the civil authority says wear this diaper on your face for no reason

01:17:06.940 and gospel coalition says we need to be less rebellious less arrogant less prideful be more

01:17:16.500 submissive wear the mask but then in the sphere of the home family with a husband who has way

01:17:26.460 more authority in biblical terms the husband has way more authority over his wife than caesar has

01:17:32.540 over the state over the civil politic but in the home if a husband says with with clear biblical

01:17:40.640 support why you can't wear yoga pants in public gospel coalition would say this is an example of

01:17:48.480 you know of just abusive you know male headship and the patriarchy being oppressive and you know

01:17:55.640 they would you know that that is this is the the the consensus and again that i'm not describing 0.63

01:18:04.120 right now i'm not describing the opinions of a blue-haired feminist who who murders babies in

01:18:10.040 the womb i'm talking about again complementarians i'm talking about reformed quasi-conservative

01:18:20.560 complementarian evangelical christians 0.98

01:18:23.780 and and if civil authority tells you to do something stupid without cause they would echo 0.95

01:18:34.460 caesar and say render unto caesar what is caesar's submit to caesar but then if a husband 0.94

01:18:43.940 who's made vows to his bride with a wife who's called to submit to him as the church submits

01:18:52.320 to christ if he says something with clear biblical support like dressing more modestly

01:18:58.100 that we would say is an example of tyranny

01:19:05.020 an overstep of authority that's what i was addressing in my sermon that's the larger

01:19:13.240 context the larger point that i was trying to make four spheres of government self home church

01:19:20.280 state in each of these spheres of government you have greater degrees of authority but lesser and

01:19:28.040 lesser scopes of authority. In the state, wide scope of authority, lots of people in your

01:19:34.140 authority, but it's about an inch deep. In the church, less people that you have authority over

01:19:39.180 as a pastor, but a little bit greater degree of authority. In the home, very small scope of

01:19:45.340 authority. In my case, five people, my wife and my children, but a greater degree of authority.

01:19:50.140 I have more authority over my wife than I have over my congregation and more authority over my

01:19:54.360 children than i have over my wife and what does that authority look like to provide some practical

01:19:59.200 examples i gave them in this sermon with my children it means i even have authority for my

01:20:04.560 two and three year old about when to go to the bathroom it's potty time before bed i want you

01:20:09.880 to go potty right as a pastor i can never tell someone in my congregation when to go potty

01:20:15.400 that would be tyranny that would be an abuse of authority i don't have that authority but in the

01:20:20.540 home i have authority over a smaller amount of people but a greater degree with my wife i don't

01:20:26.180 have the authority to tell her when to go potty but i do have the authority to tell her not to

01:20:31.180 wear yoga pants which again if you're tuning in right now my wife wouldn't do because she fears

01:20:35.180 the lord she understands biblical modesty but the example that i did give a few weeks ago in my

01:20:40.340 sermon is that i have the authority to tell my wife who is married to the pastor of a credo

01:20:48.360 baptist church hey i don't want you to voluntarily subject yourself to conscience binding arguments

01:20:57.440 towards the paedo-baptist position to where you're now placed in in a difficult spot to where you

01:21:05.460 can't help but think that you are a part of a church and married to a man who's currently in

01:21:12.700 sin for not baptizing infants that's probably not going to be good for the unity of our marriage

01:21:18.860 it's probably not going to be good for the unity of our congregation yet at the same time let god

01:21:23.860 be true and every man a liar so if presbyterians are right then we'll become presbyterian but let's

01:21:30.060 do it together and don't outpace me aka don't read and become convinced and persuaded in this

01:21:37.720 particular topic before I'm ready to do it with you. Crazy, huh? Thanks for tuning in.

01:22:00.600 Can I be frank with you for just a second right here at the end? Look, some of you guys,

01:22:05.380 you're financially supporting this ministry. And from the bottom of my heart, I say, thank you. I

01:22:10.780 cannot thank you enough. However, some of you, you just, you can't afford it. In fact, some of you,

01:22:18.160 you shouldn't afford it. Let's be honest. I mean, we're living in Joe Biden's ridiculous economy.

01:22:24.860 Our nation and our totalitarian political elites lost their minds over the last three years 0.91

01:22:33.000 due to COVID. We have written checks that we simply cannot cash. It doesn't matter if people

01:22:39.920 change the definition of a recession. We are living in a recession right now regardless.

01:22:46.820 Some of you are struggling to afford a carton of eggs at the grocery store. You cannot support

01:22:53.120 financially this ministry at this time, nor should you, but you could still help us tremendously.

01:22:59.800 I am asking you, please, if you're willing to do so, take one minute of your time.

01:23:06.360 Leave us a five-star review on your favorite podcast platform, iTunes, Spotify, whatever

01:23:12.500 that might be.

01:23:13.780 This is the way the system works.

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01:23:19.960 We need to be strategic.

01:23:21.880 You leave us a five-star review, and our podcast shows up for more people.

01:23:26.400 and the Word of God and courageous theology applied in practical ways to every realm of life

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The NXR Podcast - May 18, 2023

BONUS EPISODE - How Much Authority Does A Husband⧸Father Actually Have？

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