The NXR Podcast - QUESTIONS - Can We Have The Lord’s Supper At Our Wedding？

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00:00:21.280 Lauren Schmidt says, what's the best argument against a bride and groom alone

00:00:26.520 participating in the Lord's Supper at a wedding ceremony? 0.87

00:00:30.600 Fantastic question.

00:00:32.040 Let me go ahead and pull up a text here.

00:00:33.740 So for this, we need one of the best texts.

00:00:36.080 It's going to be 1 Corinthians chapter 11.

00:00:38.000 Again, the question is from Lauren Schmidt.

00:00:40.240 Thanks for writing in, Lauren.

00:00:41.320 It says, what's the best argument against a bride and groom alone

00:00:45.000 participating in the Lord's Supper at a wedding ceremony?

00:00:48.000 So first, I'm going to assume with this question

00:00:50.180 that what Lauren is saying is not just it being improper,

00:00:55.480 to administer the Lord's Supper at a wedding.

00:00:59.020 But she's particularly, specifically talking about

00:01:01.620 the Lord's Supper being administered at a wedding

00:01:05.040 only to the bride and groom.

00:01:06.840 And that I would be strongly against.

00:01:09.140 I would be against both,

00:01:10.360 but I would be more strongly against 1.00

00:01:12.160 the Lord's Supper being given to the bride

00:01:15.000 and the groom only, only.

00:01:17.580 And this happens at times in weddings.

00:01:19.820 As a part of the wedding ceremony,

00:01:21.620 the bride and groom take the Lord's Supper

00:01:24.240 to acknowledge that the Lord is a part of this covenant

00:01:26.680 that they're making with one another.

00:01:28.100 I appreciate the intention behind it.

00:01:31.640 I think it's a good intention, 1.00

00:01:32.960 but I do think that it's unbiblical, misplaced.

00:01:35.520 And that would be particularly wrong 0.99

00:01:37.020 because if you have a Christian husband and wife 1.00

00:01:40.580 getting married, 0.99

00:01:41.380 I'm assuming that only a Christian husband and wife 1.00

00:01:43.300 would really have the motivation 0.92

00:01:44.720 to take the Lord's Supper in their wedding.

00:01:46.720 But that implies or assumes

00:01:48.960 that if it's a Christian husband and wife,

00:01:50.580 they probably have invited christian friends and family there may be unbelievers present but there

00:01:56.280 are are certainly some other believers that are present in the wedding ceremony so then what you

00:02:00.800 have is you have a two christians being served the lord's supper while other christians are

00:02:07.360 spectating but not they're being effectively barred from the lord's table that's what you

00:02:13.340 have happening so we have to be honest about it and call it what it is i know it's a beautiful

00:02:16.740 symbol and all these kinds of things. And I have no doubt that if you've done this, you're listening,

00:02:20.760 you did this at your wedding. I have no doubt that your intentions were good and you were simply

00:02:24.660 ignorant on the subject and that it wasn't some overt rebellion in your heart against the Lord.

00:02:29.860 So first and foremost, hear that. I'm speaking with grace here and compassion. I don't think 0.98

00:02:35.340 that Christians do this. It is a common practice, but I don't think that it is commonly done because

00:02:40.080 of outright rebellion, but rather I think it's a matter of ignorance. But that being said,

00:02:45.280 what you inevitably are setting up 1.00

00:02:48.620 is a situation where you have two Christians 0.99

00:02:51.280 being served the Lord's Supper

00:02:52.320 and a bunch of other Christians

00:02:55.380 who are present at the wedding

00:02:56.780 being effectively barred from the Lord's table.

00:02:59.640 And that is thoroughly unbiblical. 0.54

00:03:02.220 That is thoroughly unbiblical. 0.73

00:03:03.480 So let's look at this.

00:03:04.260 This is 1 Corinthians chapter 11.

00:03:07.680 1 Corinthians chapter 11

00:03:10.440 talks about head coverings

00:03:11.820 and talks about the Lord's Supper.

00:03:13.180 So let's skip and look at the Lord's Supper, starting in verse 17, 1 Corinthians 11, 17,

00:03:18.120 but in the following instructions, I do not commend you because when you come together,

00:03:21.940 it is not for the better, but for the worse. For in the first place, when you come together as a

00:03:27.600 church, I hear that there are divisions among you. So this could speak back to that bitterness,

00:03:32.640 right? That causes divisions and factions and defiles many. So it could be, there are divisions

00:03:38.420 among you, talking about relational divisions because of sin. But I think that the apostle

00:03:43.440 is actually, I think he's including that, but I think he's also talking about literal divisions,

00:03:50.660 physical divisions, that the whole church is not coming together at the same time. Because look at

00:03:57.060 what he continues to say. For in the first place, when you come together as a church, I hear there

00:04:01.280 are divisions among you, and I believe it in part, for there must be factions among you, in order

00:04:06.260 that those who are genuine among you may be recognized. I don't have time to talk about

00:04:10.420 what he means with that. Verse 20 now. When you come together, it is not the Lord's supper that

00:04:15.300 you eat. For in eating, each one goes ahead with his own meal. One goes hungry, another gets drunk.

00:04:24.540 What? Do you not have houses to eat and drink in? Or do you despise the church of God and humiliate

00:04:30.800 those who have nothing? What shall I say to you? Shall I commend you in these things? No, I will

00:04:36.600 not. All right. So let me say this. Part of what was happening in the church at Corinth is that

00:04:42.420 the church was physically divided. And then they were doing this because they were

00:04:48.640 sinfully divided, relationally divided, but they were deliberately showing up physically

00:04:54.380 to the Lord's Day gathering at differing times.

00:04:58.120 Some were showing up early

00:04:59.400 before others had a chance to get there

00:05:02.060 and consuming all the Lord's Supper

00:05:04.800 so that nothing was left for those who showed up later.

00:05:09.700 And that's, so my point is, part of division,

00:05:13.440 the Lord's Supper is meant to be a unifying sacrament, okay?

00:05:16.540 So the signs and seals of the new covenant,

00:05:19.100 what we have is we have baptism,

00:05:20.420 which is the initiating oath sign,

00:05:22.500 and the Lord's Supper, which is the renewing O sign.

00:05:25.380 Baptism is the initiating O sign.

00:05:27.820 The Lord's Supper is the renewing O sign.

00:05:29.760 In baptism, we have the one joining the many.

00:05:33.580 One person making a credible profession of faith

00:05:37.200 and public confession of faith,

00:05:39.460 a public profession of faith,

00:05:40.780 and being baptized into the Lord Jesus Christ

00:05:43.380 and his body, the church.

00:05:45.720 So we have the one who joins the many.

00:05:47.260 In the Lord's Supper, we have the many who are made one.

00:05:51.020 Baptism, initiating O sign, the one joins the many, the Lord's Supper, renewing O sign,

00:05:56.700 covenant renewal ceremony, sacrament, where the many are made one.

00:06:01.340 We see this in 1 Corinthians 10, actually, where Paul talks about this unifying event

00:06:07.740 of the Lord's Supper that has a unifying result, that just as there is one loaf of bread,

00:06:13.880 we who are many are one.

00:06:16.020 So one of the purposes of the Lord's Supper is not a mere memorial, okay?

00:06:21.340 So this gets into positions of the Lord's Supper.

00:06:23.580 I am not a mere memorialist.

00:06:26.540 So I believe, as the scripture says, that as often as you do this, do it in remembrance

00:06:31.040 of me.

00:06:31.820 So when we take the Lord's Supper, we are looking back and remembering Christ, but that's

00:06:35.960 not all we're doing.

00:06:37.060 We're also being knit together as the body of Christ, just as we who are many, or just

00:06:42.880 as there is one loaf of bread, we who are many are made one. So in the partaking of the Lord's

00:06:49.240 Supper, it is a memorial, but not a mere memorial. It's more than that. So one, we're looking back

00:06:55.500 and remembering Christ and his sacrifice. Two, we're also looking forward and proclaiming the

00:07:00.660 Lord's death until he comes. So we look back and remember, we also look forward. There's a prophetic

00:07:06.140 function of the Lord's Supper where we proclaim to even kings and kingdoms to one another,

00:07:10.480 but also to the world we proclaim the death of christ until he comes so there's a prophetic

00:07:15.900 forward proclamation um the the memorial looking back in remembrance but there's also the unifying

00:07:24.200 of the body of christ just as there is one loaf of bread we who are many are made one

00:07:28.340 so so it is therefore um tragically ironic for the lord's supper to be taken in a spirit of division

00:07:39.060 or to be taken in a practical method of division.

00:07:44.700 For there to be a spirit of division,

00:07:47.160 sin in people's hearts,

00:07:48.400 relational division within the church

00:07:49.900 as we take the Lord's Supper,

00:07:51.660 which is meant to unite us,

00:07:52.800 just as there is one bread,

00:07:54.840 we who are many are made one.

00:07:56.340 That's one of the functions

00:07:57.280 of the sacrament of the Lord's Supper,

00:07:59.200 being joined together as the body of Christ,

00:08:01.560 the many become one.

00:08:03.720 It makes no sense for there to be relational division,

00:08:06.580 bitterness and sin in our hearts

00:08:08.380 as we partake of this sacrament that is meant to be unified, but it also makes no sense for

00:08:15.200 there to be physical division. And this is where lots of people, I'll lose you, you won't agree

00:08:20.500 with me, but by conviction, I believe that the church ecclesia literally means assembly, right?

00:08:26.340 It's the called out ones, but it also means assembly, gathering. The church is a gathering,

00:08:33.200 A physical gathering.

00:08:34.780 And so I believe that multiple campuses

00:08:37.860 are multiple churches.

00:08:40.300 So I'm against a multi-campus model.

00:08:42.840 I also believe, to a lesser degree, but still true,

00:08:45.980 that multiple services are multiple churches.

00:08:49.620 And some of you, I think, will agree with me

00:08:51.420 that even if it's not in two separate buildings

00:08:53.420 and two separate places, still two separate services,

00:08:57.140 especially when the church starts to accommodate

00:08:59.380 different styles of worship,

00:09:01.600 We have our traditional service at 9 a.m.

00:09:03.940 And then we have our contemporary service at 11 a.m.

00:09:06.700 And it accommodates to what?

00:09:08.300 To different age groups even. 1.00

00:09:10.100 So all the old people go at 9. 0.68

00:09:11.740 All the young people go at 11.

00:09:12.940 And people are so ingrained in that rhythm that there's no cross-pollination.

00:09:20.380 And you could be a part of a church of 500 people and only know half of the church.

00:09:24.540 You could go there for years and not know anyone in the first service because you go

00:09:28.240 to the second service or vice versa.

00:09:31.360 and you're serving the Lord's Supper to half of the church, and then you're serving the Lord's

00:09:37.100 Supper to the other half of the church, I would say that that is divided. That contradicts,

00:09:44.140 it's ironic, it contradicts one of the purposes of the Lord's Supper, which is to unite. We who

00:09:50.200 are many are made one. And so I would say that if you're contemplating two services, you either

00:09:54.960 need to cry out to the Lord, and you would provide a larger meeting space for you so the church can

00:10:01.240 continue to grow, or you could stop building the empire and start planting churches. Just plant a

00:10:08.000 church. Well, there's too many people. We can't account. Great. Plant a church. Or, well, we're

00:10:12.740 not ready to plant a church. Well, then great. Try to find a bigger building. Well, we can't find a

00:10:17.700 bigger building. Great. Then maybe this is a providential opportunity in the sovereignty of

00:10:21.940 God for you to partner with other biblically faithful churches in your area and encourage

00:10:27.840 people to join those churches. Wouldn't that be a blessing? To say, hey, we're not the only ones.

00:10:32.500 We're not the only ones in this city, in this place, who actually are faithful to scripture.

00:10:37.320 Here are three other churches that we partner with in many ways. And so if you're having trouble

00:10:41.740 finding a seat because the Lord has been blessing us with numerical growth, then these are the other

00:10:46.740 three churches that we would recommend for you to go and check out. It's an easy problem to solve.

00:10:53.040 The difficulty is that people don't want to solve it. It's not that it's complex.

00:10:57.020 It's just that it goes against what often pastors and church leaders want.

00:11:01.500 They want big churches.

00:11:03.080 They don't want anything that would stop the growth of the church.

00:11:06.640 But I would argue the Lord's Supper should be done together in a spiritual sense, a spiritual

00:11:13.760 unity, not with divisions and factions, relational disunity, bitterness, but also it should be

00:11:19.800 done practically in unity.

00:11:21.760 Not half of the church showing up at one time and the other half showing up later.

00:11:25.220 that is part. I'm not saying that's the only thing, Paul. I think Paul's talking about sin

00:11:30.040 in people's hearts, relational division. But I think you have to admit that showing up at two

00:11:35.760 different times so that some have the Lord's Supper and then there's nothing left for those

00:11:39.880 who arrive at another time later, that's at least in the text. It may not be the main point of the

00:11:46.820 text, but it's at least included in the text. There is spiritual division, relational division,

00:11:52.420 but there is also practical division, physical, literal division. And I think that in a wedding,

00:11:59.740 if the couple is taking it and other Christians present are being denied the Lord's Supper,

00:12:06.100 they're being rejected effectively from the Lord's table, then you are ironically going against,

00:12:11.200 you are contradicting one of the chief purposes of the Lord's Supper, which is to unite. Beyond

00:12:16.540 that, I would say better not to do the Lord's Supper in a wedding at all because the Lord's

00:12:20.660 supper does not belong to households, but it belongs to the church. So the three sovereign

00:12:25.380 spheres that God divinely instituted is the home, the church, and the state. And God has given

00:12:31.160 certain things, certain tools to each of these three spheres. To the home, God has given the rod

00:12:36.340 for training children. And he's given other things as well. To the state, God has given the sword

00:12:41.480 to curb outward manifestations of evil, to punish evildoers, to exact justice. But to the church,

00:12:49.700 God has given the sword of the spirit, or what we might call the keys of the kingdom.

00:12:55.000 That's Matthew 18, talking about church discipline, binding and loosing, and all that.

00:12:59.680 It's not separate from, but all that is intrinsically tied to the Lord's Supper.

00:13:04.560 When you bind and loose, you are removing people from the Lord's table, right?

00:13:08.160 If you loose someone, if you bind them, you are bringing them near to the Lord's Supper.

00:13:12.860 So God has given the keys of the kingdom with church membership and excommunication, church

00:13:17.680 discipline and then tied into that the sacraments of baptism and the Lord's Supper. That has not

00:13:22.940 been given to the state. It is improper for a governor to administer the Lord's Supper. And

00:13:27.580 likewise, even with a Christian family, it is improper for a father or a mother in the home 0.97

00:13:33.320 to administer the Lord's Supper. And a wedding, a wedding is, it is, even though it's a public 0.94

00:13:39.960 event, many people are present, it is a household event. It is the covenanting between two people,

00:13:46.060 a man and a woman, and the Lord, covenanting with the Lord also, to begin to initiate a new

00:13:51.960 household. A wedding is not a church event. The church should be involved. It should be involved,

00:13:58.620 but we do not believe, we're not Catholics. We do not believe that marriage is a sacrament.

00:14:04.040 We believe not in seven sacraments, but two, the Lord's Supper and baptism. I do believe that you

00:14:09.500 should have a minister officiate, a minister of the gospel, and ideally your local pastor

00:14:14.280 officiate your wedding.

00:14:17.000 So I believe that the church is certainly involved in this,

00:14:20.260 but the Lord's Supper is not given to households.

00:14:24.080 It's not given to marriages.

00:14:25.400 It's not given to weddings.

00:14:27.060 It's given to the church.

00:14:29.300 Thanks so much for listening.

00:14:30.400 But real quick, before you go, do us a small favor,

00:14:33.920 take a moment and leave us a five-star review

00:14:36.280 if you enjoyed the show.

00:14:37.900 This is undoubtedly the best way that you can help us

00:14:41.160 get this biblically faithful content to as many people as possible. Thanks so much.

The NXR Podcast - July 07, 2022

QUESTIONS - Can We Have The Lord’s Supper At Our Wedding？

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