The Podcast of the Lotus Eaters - FREEMIUM： Brokenomics

00:00:00.000 Hello and welcome to Brokonomics.

00:00:30.000 Now, on this episode, I'm going to be fixing the Imperium of Man, which is a big project.

00:00:36.760 But in order to help me, I've got Samson.

00:00:39.960 The Emperor has called for me to assist him.

00:00:43.560 I think you're one of the Emperor's most loyal servants at the moment.

00:00:46.760 Well, exactly, yes. I'm going to call this episode the Imperium of Dan.

00:00:50.380 Yes.

00:00:50.760 Yes. If you know about Warhammer, you'll find that incredibly funny.

00:00:53.940 Yes. This entire episode is going to be incredibly funny.

00:00:57.420 Well, yes. I mean, that's why I dressed down for it, because it would confuse people.

00:01:02.200 Some of you won't know what the hell this is about.

00:01:05.740 So I'll give a very brief summary of the background to this.

00:01:10.620 And basically, there was a company called, well, there is a company called Games Workshop.

00:01:14.600 I think they popped up in like the 80s, early 80s, something like that.

00:01:17.320 Yes. In the before times.

00:01:18.420 Yes, in the before times. And they have probably the best business model I have ever seen.

00:01:25.440 Because what they do is they buy plastic for like maybe a pound a kilo, if even that.

00:01:30.940 Probably less than that, yes.

00:01:31.820 Probably less than that, right. And then they sell it at a 5,000% markup after having turned the plastic into figurines.

00:01:40.020 Yes. And they're not even completed figurines. You have to build them yourself.

00:01:44.660 Yes. Well, I actually decided for this episode to go out and buy an army.

00:01:52.100 And obviously, I wanted an army which reflected my personality and represented me.

00:01:57.680 So I went for the custodians, of course.

00:01:59.420 Yes.

00:01:59.900 And I've just been having a look at it. Let's have a look.

00:02:03.340 So, right. And this cost 105 quid.

00:02:08.740 Yes.

00:02:09.440 And you get basically...

00:02:11.300 How many sprues? So that's one?

00:02:13.060 You get...

00:02:14.060 There must be two or three sprues in there, right? Big ones?

00:02:17.500 There's three.

00:02:17.920 There's three.

00:02:18.520 Three sprues.

00:02:19.540 Right. But they are basically just selling me plastic.

00:02:21.800 Yes. Injection moulded plastic, yes.

00:02:25.240 Egyptian moulded. What does that mean?

00:02:26.680 Injection moulded.

00:02:27.480 Oh, injection moulded.

00:02:28.160 Yeah, yeah. So they've taken the powder, melded it down, forced it under high pressure into a mould that they've spent a long time carving out a bit of metal.

00:02:35.180 Well, but I mean...

00:02:36.780 There you go.

00:02:37.400 And I could easily do a whole Brokeconomics just on Games Workshop because, I mean, put it this way, 10 years ago their share price was £4.50.

00:02:45.520 And today it's £144.50, which meaning, and this might speak to some of you if you are, you know, Warhammer fans, that means that if 10 years ago you had a £15,000 house deposit and your woman was bitching at you, stop buying those bloody models and save up for your house deposit,

00:03:05.640 if you had just ignored her, put the £15,000 into Games Workshop, carried on buying the models, you currently have half a million and you could buy your house outright.

00:03:15.940 Yes. Or you could buy a lot of Warhammer models with that money.

00:03:19.280 Well, yeah. I mean, obviously you would actually do that instead, wouldn't you?

00:03:21.880 Because a proper Warhammer fan wouldn't have spent any of their money on anything other than the Warhammer.

00:03:26.840 Yes, which is probably why this company is doing so well.

00:03:30.060 But I don't think we talk about Warhammer Games Workshop on this occasion.

00:03:35.600 We're trying to save the Imperium.

00:03:37.680 Yes.

00:03:38.000 Because quite frankly, it's an absolute bloody mess.

00:03:42.040 And you're here to talk about that because I think you've dabbled in this hobby.

00:03:46.880 Just before I got hired here, I started playing and becoming really interested in it again.

00:03:52.800 Right.

00:03:54.300 I didn't quite do it over COVID like everyone else seemed to have.

00:03:57.920 Everyone else seemed to have started it.

00:03:59.280 I get all of that.

00:04:00.880 Well, that's the thing on the share.

00:04:01.660 If you look at the share price, so basically it went up massively during COVID.

00:04:05.100 Yes.

00:04:05.460 And then COVID ended and it had a big fall.

00:04:08.160 But the problem is, is everybody was now hooked on their, you know, heroin, plastic, whatever it was.

00:04:14.060 Yeah. People call it plastic crack for a reason.

00:04:17.000 Yes. Yes.

00:04:18.000 And then the share price just shot back up again.

00:04:19.960 So, you know, COVID was just, it was one of the few, you know, winners from COVID.

00:04:25.000 So I could easily do an episode just on Games Workshop.

00:04:27.340 But, but we are here to talk about the law.

00:04:30.500 It's set in the, in the 40th millennium, which is quite a long way.

00:04:35.080 41st millennium.

00:04:36.080 41st millennium.

00:04:36.620 Yes.

00:04:37.160 Yes.

00:04:38.220 Yes.

00:04:38.680 Okay.

00:04:38.900 And so just in case any of you are wondering, well, how do we get from, from here to there?

00:04:46.060 I've got a very, very short history for you.

00:04:49.120 Go and, honestly, there are millions of law channels if you want to go and get into the law.

00:04:52.740 We are condensing 40,000 years worth of fictional history.

00:04:56.620 Yes.

00:04:57.180 Into the next 10 minutes.

00:04:58.580 Yes.

00:04:58.980 Well, probably less than that.

00:05:00.100 Yeah.

00:05:00.200 So there's the Age of Terror.

00:05:03.180 Now we're in that now.

00:05:04.360 Yep.

00:05:04.760 And that runs the next few thousand years.

00:05:07.080 And then about 15,000 years from now, you get the, humanity enters a sort of golden age

00:05:12.800 of technology.

00:05:14.560 And, oh, you wanted to talk about STDs, didn't you?

00:05:19.620 Because apparently they're rife during this period.

00:05:21.360 So STCs, or Standard Template Constructs, they're basically these, they're not quite

00:05:27.860 AIs, but they're these things that have self-contained fathoms of information.

00:05:35.800 They're civilization builders.

00:05:37.080 Yes.

00:05:37.360 They are these bits of technology that allow humans to create whatever they want on this

00:05:44.480 like incredible industrial scale.

00:05:46.280 So you basically go to another planet with your STD.

00:05:50.300 STC, yeah.

00:05:50.900 STC.

00:05:51.440 Yeah, yeah, yeah.

00:05:51.860 And then you break out your STC.

00:05:55.060 Yeah.

00:05:55.320 And it builds you a whole civilization.

00:05:56.760 It does it all for you because it knows how it's all run.

00:05:59.760 And that's also been run by AIs.

00:06:03.200 AIs are controlling everything at this point.

00:06:05.460 Yes.

00:06:05.900 Humanity has basically become...

00:06:07.280 It's a post-utopian, post-scarcity utopia.

00:06:10.880 Yeah.

00:06:11.060 They are completely reliant on these AIs because they do literally everything.

00:06:16.280 Yes.

00:06:16.660 But it also means they've expanded across the entire galaxy.

00:06:20.140 Very little resistance from alien species.

00:06:24.200 It is essentially the utopian vision of Gene Roddenberry, Star Trek, that kind of stuff.

00:06:30.100 Yes.

00:06:30.400 It's proper culture series, you know, Commonwealth series.

00:06:34.060 It's all that.

00:06:36.120 Now, I will say the law is incredibly hazy about this period because even though it's 15,000

00:06:41.200 years in our future, it's 15,000 years in their past.

00:06:44.440 Yeah.

00:06:44.940 So it is further ago for them than the last Ice Age was for us.

00:06:49.300 And we know bugger all about what happened before the last Ice Age.

00:06:52.400 Yeah.

00:06:52.520 All the records have been lost.

00:06:53.500 And it's a bit like that in this.

00:06:55.160 They've basically lost all of the records.

00:06:57.240 And the law talks very vaguely about men of stone and men of iron.

00:07:03.820 Yeah.

00:07:04.360 Men of iron.

00:07:05.100 Men of iron were these like...

00:07:06.900 I think I know what they are.

00:07:08.640 Yeah.

00:07:08.840 So the men of gold, I mean, that's obviously people like me, you know, maybe you.

00:07:13.780 And the men of stone, I don't think they're actually stone.

00:07:17.180 I think it's silicon.

00:07:18.440 And I think it was something like on aliens, you know, the replicants, the silicon replicants.

00:07:24.240 Yeah.

00:07:24.860 And the men of iron are probably AI, they're like Tesla bots.

00:07:28.440 Yes.

00:07:28.700 They are essentially Tesla bots that do all the work.

00:07:31.420 Yes.

00:07:31.740 They do everything.

00:07:32.620 They are the ones using the STCs.

00:07:35.360 They are doing the work for humans.

00:07:38.740 Humans become incredibly self-reliant on them.

00:07:41.400 Because we also ought to mention that there was a little trouble.

00:07:44.100 So in this universe, they've got something which is both a bit handy and a bit dodgy at the same time.

00:07:50.180 And it's called the warp.

00:07:50.880 And it's kind of this sphere of reality that is based outside the material world.

00:07:57.760 And it is in an immaterial world.

00:07:59.380 But it surrounds our universe.

00:08:01.280 And it's like an extra dimension.

00:08:03.360 For the lore fans, you mind if I read this little bit in this book?

00:08:06.520 Oh, go on then.

00:08:07.040 Go on.

00:08:07.720 Okay.

00:08:08.220 This will explain the warp.

00:08:09.840 Although it doesn't really explain the warp.

00:08:11.300 Because the point of the warp is, it's whatever Games Workshop needs it to be.

00:08:15.740 Yes.

00:08:16.040 Because it is everything and also nothing.

00:08:18.340 And there is, it's the most confusing thing they've ever made.

00:08:23.000 But it's essentially a convenient plot device for them to go, the warp did this.

00:08:27.480 Ah.

00:08:27.780 Therefore, because of the warp, this nonsensical thing has happened.

00:08:32.400 Yes.

00:08:32.760 But let me read this chapter from The Flight of the Eisenstein.

00:08:37.100 Oh, go on then.

00:08:37.860 Very good book, by the way.

00:08:38.920 It is impossible for a person possessed of an unaltered mind to comprehend the nature of warp space.

00:08:47.620 The seething, churning ocean of raw non-matter was psychoactive.

00:08:52.640 It was as much a product of the psyches of those that looked upon it as it was a shifting, willful landscape of its own.

00:08:59.920 On ancient earth, there had once been a philosopher who warned that if men were to look into an abyss, then he should know that the abyss would also look back into the man.

00:09:11.880 In no other place was this as true as it was the immaterium, which is another word for the warp.

00:09:17.520 The warp was a mirror for the emotions of every living thing, a sea of turbulent thought, echoes, the dark dreads of every hidden desire, broken ID mixed into a raw mass of disorder.

00:09:29.200 If one could apply a single word to describe the nature of the warp, that word would be chaos.

00:09:35.440 Yes.

00:09:36.340 So it's, and it serves a number of purposes, like you say, so it's basically like hyperspace in Star Wars, but it also has demons.

00:09:44.320 Yeah, so it is this place where the rules of physics, time, space, none of that applies.

00:09:53.540 Well, it does make it quite helpful because if you can travel into it briefly, then you can cross vast distances in real space and then exit the warp and now you're very, very far away.

00:10:03.760 So it's quite useful.

00:10:04.540 Yeah, so the imperium of man and the civilizations of man before it were using it to travel around the galaxy much faster than they would have had, would have been able to in the age of, age of terror as we are now.

00:10:19.720 Because you could argue that this is actually hard sci-fi and that it follows physics rules.

00:10:24.020 Yes.

00:10:24.640 As long as you accept the warp.

00:10:26.460 As long as you accept the warp doesn't accept physics rules.

00:10:29.400 Because it does.

00:10:30.820 Well, we don't know.

00:10:31.680 Yes.

00:10:31.940 Maybe further work can be done on that.

00:10:34.860 But it does have the slightly unfortunate side effect that if you just travel through it unaided, you'll go completely mad.

00:10:42.080 Yes.

00:10:42.200 So there is that.

00:10:42.980 Which is where these sort of the men of stone, which I think is silicon, and the men of iron come in because they can travel out into space.

00:10:52.440 They can take one of their STCs with them and they can set up a new world, grow some human embryos, and then you've got a new world out there.

00:11:02.500 And basically they just did this and just popped up over pretty much most of the galaxy.

00:11:06.580 Yeah, almost the entire galaxy completely, well not completely, almost completely unhindered by the Xenos species that currently inhabit it.

00:11:16.080 Well, you see, that's where it goes slightly wrong because there are other species out there.

00:11:21.420 Not, you know, not that.

00:11:22.540 Well, there's a few.

00:11:24.020 But one of the most established ones is something called the Eldari, right?

00:11:27.980 And again, to keep the lore very short, they are massive space perverts and they have kind of reached their post-scarcity utopia like a million years ago and basically just spent all their time doing orgies and sick, you know, you know, torture.

00:11:47.480 I mean, basically anything to get a carnal kick, these guys were into it.

00:11:51.260 And there were such massive space perverts that that thing that you said a little while ago about the warp kind of reflects, you know, well, not just human emotions, sentient species emotions.

00:12:03.860 Yeah, yeah, yeah.

00:12:04.320 They were such massive space perverts that they birthed a new chaos god within the warp, the pervert god.

00:12:13.600 Yeah.

00:12:14.060 Slaanesh, I think it's called.

00:12:15.080 Yes.

00:12:15.340 And that had a slightly unfortunate effect that made the warp far more dangerous and also caused a bit of a rift.

00:12:24.300 And it had the slightly unfortunate side effect of ripping the humanities, well, both of them, the Eldaris and the humanities civilizations apart.

00:12:32.020 I mean, almost completely destroying every ounce of progress both civilizations have made.

00:12:37.280 Yes.

00:12:37.540 And then I think it's either at that point or just before the men of iron and the men of silicon go to war with each other.

00:12:45.180 And basically humanity is just screwed at this point.

00:12:48.420 Yeah.

00:12:48.580 The men of iron essentially start an armed uprising against all of humanity and start a war of unimaginable chaos and destruction.

00:13:00.200 Yes.

00:13:00.720 And they kill trillions upon trillions of people.

00:13:03.500 Yes.

00:13:04.620 Far more devastating than future wars, such as the Horus Heresy.

00:13:08.380 Yes.

00:13:08.700 Which we'll touch on in a minute.

00:13:10.400 Yes.

00:13:10.820 So basically the largest disaster humankind in this universe has ever had before upon them.

00:13:18.020 But anyway, humanity has a good 10,000 years.

00:13:20.720 Between the 15th millennium and the 25th, things are going peachy until the space perverts screw it up.

00:13:28.080 And then you've got the Age of Strife, which is 5,000 years of, I want to say Mad Max.

00:13:35.500 And it kind of is Mad Max, but it's also got fragments of advanced technology.

00:13:41.200 Yes.

00:13:41.720 So you've got sort of techno-barbarians and...

00:13:44.380 Yeah, techno-barbarians rampaging across the universe.

00:13:48.140 Well, not...

00:13:48.580 They're individual because everyone's cut off now.

00:13:50.300 Oh, yes.

00:13:50.960 Everyone's stuck on their own planet.

00:13:52.480 It's all happening across the universe.

00:13:54.060 But because of the warp, essentially starting these massive storms which consume galaxies

00:14:01.380 and cut all supply and trade routes off from one another,

00:14:05.960 even planets like Mars gets cut off from Earth.

00:14:10.640 And in the Warhammer scale of the Warhammer world, that isn't very far.

00:14:14.700 No.

00:14:14.800 But basically everything is cut off from each other.

00:14:18.320 And on these individual planets, the Men of Iron, the human civilizations begin fighting against each other.

00:14:25.700 Yes.

00:14:27.260 Unimaginable death, destruction.

00:14:29.720 Well, you're basically reduced to a sort of Middle Ages level technology all of a sudden.

00:14:33.960 After having spent 10,000 years as a post-scarcity utopia, so nobody has a bloody clue how to actually do anything.

00:14:41.940 Millions have died from that alone if it wasn't for the Men of Iron rampaging.

00:14:45.320 Yeah.

00:14:45.620 And it's like Mad Max with medieval technology, except you might also have a plasma bolter or something else.

00:14:52.940 Yes.

00:14:53.360 Yeah.

00:14:53.780 So it's all a bit messed up.

00:14:55.140 So anyway, 5,000 years of pure backwardness and chaos and barbarity, and humanity looks proper done at that point.

00:15:03.980 Until we get the emergence of the God Emperor.

00:15:08.260 And he basically, he comes up and he says, no, enough of this.

00:15:12.440 I'm going to put this place in order.

00:15:15.120 And he begins conquering the entire Earth, and he's very successful.

00:15:19.460 He does that.

00:15:20.400 And once he's finished that, he's like, now I'm going to conquer everything else.

00:15:24.500 Yeah.

00:15:25.340 He starts, I believe, it's called the Great Crusade.

00:15:29.800 Yes.

00:15:30.060 Basically unites humanity on Earth and then begins his, well, soon to be called Holy Conquest across the stars to reunite this post-utopian society.

00:15:41.720 Because he knows there's all these other human worlds out there.

00:15:44.340 Yep.

00:15:44.580 Now, he's convinced that because the mass of space perverts screwed up once before, if humanity doesn't get its shit together, something like that is going to happen again.

00:15:56.500 And the only way to stop that is if humanity is united under him, and then they exterminate everything that isn't humanity.

00:16:05.000 Which, you know, give him credit.

00:16:06.940 Bold plan.

00:16:07.640 Yeah.

00:16:09.000 Fair enough.

00:16:09.540 Yeah, yeah, yeah.

00:16:11.220 It has its merits.

00:16:13.520 Yes, it has its merits.

00:16:15.240 So anyway, and now in order, and we're almost done with the lore bit, and then we can get on with the actual problem with Imperial.

00:16:20.940 In order to conquer the galaxy, it occurs to him that it might be useful to have an entire race of super soldiers built.

00:16:27.940 So he promptly goes off and builds them.

00:16:29.460 So he builds himself 20 generals, and these are basically, you know, transhuman demigods.

00:16:36.320 They're like 14 foot tall, and they're...

00:16:38.780 Multiple hearts.

00:16:39.820 Yes.

00:16:40.280 Yeah, multiple extra organs that they keep inventing, basically, to make them the most powerful soldiers the galaxy I've ever seen.

00:16:48.340 Well, the Primarchs, he calls his sons.

00:16:50.640 There's 20 of those.

00:16:51.980 And these are absolute superhuman type beings.

00:16:56.120 I mean, they're absolutely singular, apart from him, of course.

00:16:59.240 And for each of them, he creates these smaller derivatives that are called Space Marines, which everyone, I'm sure, has heard of at least a bit, which are like mini versions of their Primarch.

00:17:11.320 And, you know, he's got a couple of million of them, which isn't that much, but they are...

00:17:15.720 But these things, even they are like 9, 10 foot tall, superhuman strength, fight for days.

00:17:22.040 And basically, that's where Games Workshop come in, because they can sell you models of these things, and then you can have little battles with them.

00:17:29.420 Yes.

00:17:30.220 Yes.

00:17:30.960 Yes.

00:17:31.120 So, it was a brilliant plan, one tiny flaw, that these demigods, after a while, they look around at this and think, well, hang on, if we're so great, why aren't we in charge?

00:17:46.680 And so they split into two factions, and there's another massive civil war called the Horus Heresy, and it all goes to shit again.

00:17:52.760 Yes, the Emperor's favourite son, called Horus, he was at the, well, at a certain point in the Crusade, the Great Crusade, he is promoted to Warmaster, leader of the Crusade, in order to continue the Crusade across the galaxy, as the Emperor himself has some side missions to do back on Earth.

00:18:15.020 He's got stuff to do in the basement.

00:18:16.220 Yeah, he's got stuff to do in the basement, which we won't cover today, because that would take a very long time between, yes, yes.

00:18:22.860 But, some point along the way, Horus gets gravely injured, and becomes corrupted by the Warp and Chaos, and causes what we call the Horus Heresy, where half the Primarchs, who, sons of the Emperor, to betray him in a galaxy-wide conflict.

00:18:44.280 Right, and basically start the second biggest conflict humanity's ever seen.

00:18:50.420 Yes.

00:18:50.920 Space Marines versus Space Marines, brother versus brother.

00:18:54.860 Horus wants to essentially kill the Emperor, and become the ruler of humanity.

00:19:00.040 And he's that close to succeeding, but then the Emperor kills him.

00:19:04.580 Now, you might think I've just given you a spoiler, but everybody who gets into this lore, like, knows that from the outset.

00:19:10.860 So, forgive me for the spoiler.

00:19:11.900 Yes, that's like the first, that is like the first thing you read when you pick up any edition of the rulebook.

00:19:16.260 It's, the Emperor's dead, but he's entombed upon his golden throne, sitting there for 10,000 years.

00:19:23.620 That's when things start to get...

00:19:26.900 Well, yes, because after the battle, when the Emperor is basically dead, they prop him up on his golden, and it's not just a golden throne, it's actually an ancient artifact of immense power.

00:19:38.480 And it's powerful enough to regenerate most wounds.

00:19:42.700 And if you stick a dead guy on there, it's powerful enough to basically keep him, like, 0.1% away from actually being dead.

00:19:50.780 But he is basically dead.

00:19:52.120 Yes.

00:19:52.340 And he's just this corpse on a throne that doesn't, well, it kind of rots a little bit, but not that much.

00:19:57.440 Yeah.

00:19:57.920 Yes.

00:19:58.420 And he just sits there.

00:20:00.260 And because the entire power structure has been centred around him and him alone, for the next 10,000 years, this empire enters a state of complete status.

00:20:12.460 And it gets us to the point where it's 10,000 years of utter decline, but it's still functional.

00:20:20.820 This, the Horus heresy, well, the war with the men of iron, and then the Horus heresy, essentially create this weird paradigm where no one trusts the idea of innovation, the ideas of progress in anything.

00:20:38.240 The economy, technology, society, everything must stay the same.

00:20:44.060 Order must be kept so that bad things don't happen again.

00:20:49.240 Well, and the God Emperor himself, I mean, he wasn't called that, I mean, he just called himself the Emperor.

00:20:54.760 Yes.

00:20:55.000 But he was very clear, no, I am just a man.

00:20:56.960 I may be a remarkable man, but I am just a man.

00:21:00.020 He's very clear on that.

00:21:00.760 He was not a fan of the idea of God's a religion.

00:21:03.600 No, he wasn't.

00:21:04.260 He wasn't.

00:21:04.680 Yes.

00:21:04.920 But after he dies, a religion forms around him, and that and a whole bunch of other things that we're going to talk about basically just renders this entire society completely stagnant.

00:21:17.240 Because they come to believe that everything worth inventing has already been discovered, and therefore trying to invent something or innovate in any way is heresy, and you must be immediately burnt for it.

00:21:29.220 Yes, because that, like, the way, how do I best say it, inventing something new could lead to the introduction of chaos into society, both figuratively and literally, and they don't want that.

00:21:49.680 Yes.

00:21:50.220 Well, I mean, even modest innovation is heavily frowned upon.

00:21:54.520 Yes, they don't like even changing the type of armour plating on a tank, basically.

00:22:00.840 Yes.

00:22:01.200 Because that could be dangerous.

00:22:03.440 That could be heresy.

00:22:04.100 Yeah, that's probably heresy.

00:22:05.480 If you suggest it, you better be burnt for that.

00:22:07.560 So, yes, so you now find yourself in, and actually, the underlying reason for all of this is this whole thing is set in the year 40,000.

00:22:20.720 Yes.

00:22:21.120 But, in order to help sell their models, it's helpful to do a bit of lore.

00:22:26.000 So, they invented some backstory.

00:22:27.800 Yes.

00:22:28.340 And the backstory is actually quite good for storytelling purposes, because in the current age, they don't really want anything to change.

00:22:37.620 No.

00:22:38.040 Because if somebody wins this war, this galactic war that's going on, then people stop buying models.

00:22:45.580 Yeah.

00:22:45.800 The entire point, if you take a step back from the law and want your main good guys to win, that'll never happen.

00:22:51.920 Because that means the war's ended, and the models have no reason to be backed against each other.

00:22:57.440 So, there's masses of lore for this thing, and the reason I kind of got into this is because, well, obviously, I drive a lot working here.

00:23:04.700 So, I spend about three hours a day in the car, so I get through, like, two audiobooks a week.

00:23:09.240 And when I joined here, and everybody was into Warhammer, I thought, oh, well, I'll try one of the books then.

00:23:14.280 So, I got through the book in half a week, and I thought, oh, actually, that's quite – and it is quite compelling lore.

00:23:19.120 And the reason it's quite compelling is because it's the most accurate science fiction depiction I can imagine.

00:23:26.240 Because in Star Trek, it's all utopia.

00:23:28.840 Yeah.

00:23:29.260 And most sci-fi is like this.

00:23:31.940 It's wonderful, and everybody's enlightened.

00:23:34.200 But in this future, everyone is corrupt and incompetent, and there's massive bureaucracy, and everything's screwed up, and people are insensitive.

00:23:46.420 Rulers are insensitive and, you know, casual with human life.

00:23:50.860 And it's just – and you read it, and it just feels –

00:23:53.920 It feels like the exact society we are currently living in times 40,000.

00:23:59.000 Yes.

00:23:59.980 Yes, and it just feels so much more real than normal sci-fi does.

00:24:05.440 And for that reason, the lore has become a massive thing in itself.

00:24:08.680 So, I managed to plough through many books.

00:24:12.500 I'm guessing you've read all of the – I think you said you've read The Horace Heresy.

00:24:15.400 I've read The Horace Heresy.

00:24:16.420 Yes.

00:24:16.700 And now I've started on the 40K.

00:24:19.360 Yes.

00:24:20.260 The only problem with 40K lore compared to Horace Heresy lore is that Horace Heresy is written like a regular story.

00:24:26.540 There is a beginning.

00:24:27.620 There is middle.

00:24:28.160 There is an end.

00:24:29.260 There's – it's like 60 books, but it is a continuing narrative.

00:24:32.780 Whereas the Warhammer 40K lore, up until very recently, was designed so that they'd release a book.

00:24:38.840 You'd learn about something, but it wouldn't have a definitive place on the timeline for exactly the reason we just said.

00:24:45.100 Everything has to – the states go must stay the same.

00:24:47.380 I skipped that bit because recently a couple of the Emperor's sons have come back.

00:24:53.200 Yes.

00:24:53.500 So, I just picked it up from there.

00:24:54.680 Yes.

00:24:54.900 So, Games Workshop realized that their lore was getting a bit stagnant.

00:24:58.200 The models were getting stagnant.

00:24:59.120 We need to do a refresh, big refresh, so they do something called the Great Rift in the Warhammer 40K lore,

00:25:07.240 which starts pushing the narrative forward, and they start bringing back characters from the Horace Heresy.

00:25:11.680 Stuff actually starts happening in terms – well, in all aspects of the lore, and the story is moving forwards again.

00:25:19.240 Yes.

00:25:19.660 Now, I mean, they have actually got – actually, I'll talk about this when we come to the military room,

00:25:28.880 but actually, what I wanted to go through was my seven-point plan to fix the Imperium.

00:25:35.360 But I don't know if we – what time are we?

00:25:39.160 We're 25 minutes in.

00:25:40.240 We're making good time, actually.

00:25:41.460 Yes, yes, yes.

00:25:42.980 We start with my seven pillars of what's wrong, and the first one I've got is the Mechanicum.

00:25:50.620 Who are the Mechanicum?

00:25:53.440 The Mechanicum, or the Adeptus Mechanicus, are the – they are –

00:26:00.180 They're the Martians.

00:26:01.200 They are the Martians.

00:26:02.360 They are robotic – robotically augmented humans who have essentially discarded the flesh that they once held on their bodies.

00:26:12.940 Well, a lot of them have still got flesh.

00:26:13.980 They've just got things stuck into it.

00:26:15.560 Yeah.

00:26:15.840 They've discarded the usefulness of their flesh – well, sorry.

00:26:20.260 They've discarded their flesh because they deemed it no longer useful to help them design, create, and maintain.

00:26:28.040 Yes.

00:26:28.700 They are beings of – how can I best describe this?

00:26:34.160 Cyborgs, maybe?

00:26:35.440 Cyborgs.

00:26:35.640 Something like cyborgs.

00:26:36.500 Cyborgs, yeah.

00:26:37.340 Basically, a cyborg race of people.

00:26:39.180 They control the vast arm –

00:26:44.240 The tech.

00:26:44.680 The tech.

00:26:45.260 Everything technological.

00:26:46.860 They are in control.

00:26:48.320 They refuse to give up control of this to anyone, even Rebute Giliman, the Primark of the Ultra means.

00:26:56.620 But they are the techies.

00:26:57.700 I mean, if Lotus Eaters was being filmed in the 41st millennium, then everybody on your side of the camera would be a Martian.

00:27:07.560 Yes.

00:27:08.200 They are also identified by their adherence to their religious nature.

00:27:16.800 Yes.

00:27:17.360 So, I mean, that's one of the first massively screwed up things in the future we talked about.

00:27:23.740 Innovation gets you burnt.

00:27:25.840 Yes.

00:27:26.100 And because of the men of iron thing, which they barely understand, but they do know that at some time in their past, they created AIs, and the AIs turned on and caused a massive war.

00:27:38.540 And this has a generational memory effect on these people, down to the point where if you were to even suggest creating an AI, people would be so disgusted at the idea of you suggesting a thinking machine that you would definitely get burnt for that.

00:27:51.680 You would be labelled a heretic, which is the Mechanicum's word for heretic, and then, yeah, burnt.

00:27:59.600 So they don't have any AIs, except they do.

00:28:04.000 All over, they have AIs throughout the Imperium, but they call them machine spirits.

00:28:12.360 Yep.

00:28:12.760 And they are AI, but they're heavily, heavily degraded.

00:28:16.760 And basically, they spit out mostly rambling nonsense.

00:28:22.940 Code.

00:28:23.760 They're all based on code that the Mechanicum can't read themselves.

00:28:27.180 Yes.

00:28:27.460 Because they've lost the ability to read or...

00:28:29.760 To code.

00:28:30.520 Well, yeah, they haven't learnt code.

00:28:33.580 Yes.

00:28:33.800 And so when they got one of these babbling machines, and it's still useful because it's still a very powerful AI, so it can still do stuff that's worth having, but they perceive it as a machine spirit.

00:28:49.600 And the job of the tech priests is, when this thing spits out a whole load of garbled nonsense, the tech priest's job is to divine what the machine spirit meant by it.

00:29:01.880 Yeah.

00:29:02.560 And then turn that into useful, usable information.

00:29:06.500 And because these AIs are so heavily degraded...

00:29:09.600 Most of it isn't useful, and most of it is essentially discarded.

00:29:13.540 But you do need people who can, you know, sift truth through superstition, is essentially what they're doing.

00:29:20.300 Yeah, which is why they are known as the cult Mechanicum.

00:29:22.800 Yes.

00:29:23.280 They're essentially a cult attempting to divine how technology works that used to prop up entire civilizations, but now they don't know how it works.

00:29:32.780 Yes.

00:29:33.400 So, you know, why is the Mechanicum...

00:29:36.480 Oh, the other thing we should say on the law front is these guys all originate from Mars.

00:29:41.260 So, again, going back to the beginning, when the God Emperor decided...

00:29:44.780 Well, he was just the Emperor back then.

00:29:46.440 When the Emperor decides he's going to take over the entire galaxy, he's in a massive hurry.

00:29:51.500 Because he doesn't know who else is out there building their empire first.

00:29:56.680 So he's in a massive, massive rush.

00:29:59.440 And when he gets to Mars, his first stop, well, I suppose there's Luna, and there's stuff going on in Luna as well.

00:30:05.340 But he gets to Mars, and these guys are techies, and he's like, yeah, sod it, whatever.

00:30:10.760 You guys can be the techies.

00:30:12.960 Just come on board.

00:30:15.160 Don't ask too many questions.

00:30:16.680 I want to get out there.

00:30:17.400 I want to get doing shit.

00:30:18.140 Yeah, he's basically like, we will ignore the fact that you're praying to technology as a religion.

00:30:23.520 Yes.

00:30:23.780 He really doesn't like religion due to its implications of chaos.

00:30:28.420 There's a lot of stuff there.

00:30:30.040 But he basically goes, we'll ignore that if you make us some guns and make us some tanks.

00:30:35.940 Yes.

00:30:36.380 And make us everything.

00:30:38.380 So he kind of basically gave them early concessions, really good concessions early on, which means that then he died before he could sort anything out properly.

00:30:47.860 So these guys have had a lock on all technology for 10,000 years, and they worship it rather than study it.

00:30:57.280 So technology has gone, in fact, it's degraded quite significantly from the 30th millennia down to the 41st millennium.

00:31:05.020 Yes.

00:31:05.320 It's degraded.

00:31:06.380 The machine spirits or the AIs have degraded even further, meaning that the...

00:31:10.880 The tanks and weapons they were using in the Horus Heresy, so the models you can buy for that, a lot of them don't exist in the modern, well, modern 40K setting because they forgot how to make them.

00:31:22.180 Yes.

00:31:23.320 Yes.

00:31:23.660 And the tech priests have become even more specialized because the AIs have degraded to such a point.

00:31:30.420 Yeah.

00:31:30.700 But you used to be able to ask it a question and you get a bit of garble and you get an answer, but now it's just a complete mess.

00:31:36.680 This is where the STCs come back in because the STCs are what the tech priests use to make the things.

00:31:43.540 But because so many of them were lost when the Horus Heresy happened and the Man of Iron attacked, it's the same thing with the...

00:31:55.360 My understanding is they don't have a single complete STC.

00:31:59.400 No, they find fragments of STCs and basically worship them as holy artifacts.

00:32:04.640 Yeah, well, that's the other thing they do.

00:32:05.960 So they have actually got quite a lot of good gear, you know.

00:32:09.900 They have all the best stuff.

00:32:11.140 Yes.

00:32:12.500 And they've got lots of siege engines, for example.

00:32:14.920 They've got titans, these big war machines, which would be really useful to the Imperium because they are in a massive war against several alien species.

00:32:22.280 And they could deploy this stuff, but instead they build a shrine around it and they worship it instead, which is, yes.

00:32:32.460 On the top of some of these, the largest Imperial Walkers and titans, there are cathedrals built for that exact purpose.

00:32:40.680 So, you know, imagine that, I don't know, something happened to our society and then a cult emerged who built iPhones by hand while worshipping the manual and not really understanding what they're doing.

00:32:58.160 You know, the quality of the iPhone, the production speed and everything would be low.

00:33:02.020 They worshipped iOS, like, 2000, whatever they are on at that point in history.

00:33:07.660 They worshipped iOS 2000 as a god and prayed to it that their production of iPhones would improve.

00:33:15.360 Yes.

00:33:15.740 It doesn't, though.

00:33:16.780 Brackets, it doesn't.

00:33:17.680 While keeping all the best ones in a shrine.

00:33:19.920 Yes.

00:33:20.320 And churning out their handmade ones, which are bad copies.

00:33:22.160 Refusing to make them better.

00:33:24.620 So, yeah, there's some inefficiency there, so we might have to come back to how we're going to fix them.

00:33:30.800 The next one on this, the ecclesiarchy, the Imperial Church.

00:33:36.780 Now, as you've said a number of times, the emperor, when he was alive, he was like, yeah, don't do religion.

00:33:41.840 Yeah, none of that, please.

00:33:42.840 You're just stirring up the warp if you do that.

00:33:44.700 That's a bad idea.

00:33:46.220 So don't worship me.

00:33:47.780 And, in fact, in the first book of the Horus Heresy, there's a scene early on where someone gets a bit carried away.

00:33:54.620 You got it there, have you?

00:33:55.760 Horus Rising.

00:33:56.540 Yeah, Horus Rising right here.

00:33:58.980 So if you want to get into the lore, that's probably a good place to start.

00:34:01.660 Yeah, read Horus Rising and the first four or five books in the Horus Heresy.

00:34:05.200 Yes.

00:34:05.780 That should tell you enough about the lore.

00:34:08.580 That you'll know if you're interested or not.

00:34:10.120 Yes.

00:34:10.840 Actually, the first book is really good because it follows the story of, was it Logan something?

00:34:16.500 Garville Logan?

00:34:18.060 Gavariel Loken, I think.

00:34:19.740 Yeah.

00:34:19.820 Right, now, that book is really good because the way he's written is so masculine.

00:34:26.860 I mean, you will double your follicle count on your testicles just by reading that book, even if you're a girl.

00:34:32.640 When I first read the book, I immediately dropped the book after reading the first chapter and went, I need to go to the gym.

00:34:40.080 Yes.

00:34:41.340 Oh, it is genuinely, I mean, it is masculine in textual form.

00:34:46.340 It is probably one of the best bits of Warhammer lore ever put in a book.

00:34:52.440 So definitely read that.

00:34:53.940 Obviously, we're not sponsored.

00:34:55.340 No.

00:34:55.440 But it is the best book to start.

00:34:57.240 No, if anything, this office sponsors them, not the other way around.

00:34:59.800 I was going to say, the amount of money we spent today when you're buying those custodians and me buying this giant Tyranid thing, that probably paid the bills for the next month.

00:35:10.540 Yes.

00:35:12.100 And Carl bought some stuff as well.

00:35:13.500 Oh, yeah.

00:35:13.860 And Cameron disappeared in there.

00:35:14.980 God knows what happened to Cameron.

00:35:16.320 Yeah.

00:35:16.580 I think we're single-handedly funding Swindon Games Workshop.

00:35:19.440 Yes.

00:35:19.740 Well, Carl definitely is.

00:35:20.640 Yes.

00:35:21.000 Carl definitely.

00:35:22.120 Oh, yeah.

00:35:22.680 Now, the reason I mentioned the first book is because there's a scene early on in that where somebody gets a bit carried away and starts saying the emperor is a god.

00:35:32.300 And he gets the shit kicked out of him by a whole bunch of guys.

00:35:35.100 He's like, what the hell are you saying?

00:35:36.000 That's heresy.

00:35:36.520 Don't say that.

00:35:38.620 Yet by 10,000 years later, if you even hint that the emperor isn't a god, he goes the other way.

00:35:44.060 So the ecclesiarchy, and I mean, you described it to me, is that in the 41st millennium, they're all religious fanatics, and that's putting it mildly.

00:35:55.120 Yes.

00:35:55.800 It is.

00:35:57.260 The entire modern 40K society, 10,000 years after the emperor's death, everything revolves around worship to the emperor and protecting humanity through the worship of the emperor.

00:36:10.240 The most common phrase anyone will say in any book is, if they're on the imperium side, is the emperor protects.

00:36:19.680 Yes.

00:36:20.580 And it is through trillions, I think it's more than trillions.

00:36:25.220 What's above trillion?

00:36:26.560 Quadrillions?

00:36:27.160 Yeah, it's quadrillions, quadrillions, if not more of people, worshipping this now semi-deital figure.

00:36:36.160 Yes.

00:36:36.400 And through that, actual miracles occur.

00:36:42.300 And through some of these miracles, which are probably just things by, well, people speculate when he died, when the emperor died, he became some kind of semi-warp god.

00:36:52.660 Well, yeah.

00:36:53.340 Chaos god.

00:36:54.080 So it's like similar to that.

00:36:55.780 And the humanity started to pray to that, and it started granting them unnatural mystical powers.

00:37:02.740 Yes.

00:37:04.040 Yes.

00:37:04.480 And a sizable amount of the population.

00:37:09.340 So the ecclesiarchy is actually by far the largest faction in 40k, much larger than what we're going to talk about next, the imperial guard.

00:37:17.800 Yes.

00:37:18.100 The army.

00:37:18.740 Because so many people are driven into such frenzy, but they become pilgrims and they just spend their life traveling around.

00:37:25.040 And entire planets are essentially reconstructed into cathedral worlds, where the entire planet's economy revolves around praying to the emperor at one specific cathedral.

00:37:39.900 And there are entire kilometer long avenues of just statues that are lying there in tribute to fallen imperial saints.

00:37:48.940 Yes.

00:37:49.260 Like, literally every cog of that planet's economy goes towards keeping the church on that planet afloat.

00:38:00.800 Now, this is bad economically for a number of reasons.

00:38:03.880 If you've got a huge percentage of your population who want to do nothing all day apart from pray to the emperor, you're not getting an awful lot else done.

00:38:12.020 And praying is the least of what they're doing.

00:38:14.900 Self-flagellation happens a lot.

00:38:17.460 Yes.

00:38:18.340 So when I got into the new...

00:38:19.920 So when I finished with the 40k and started on...

00:38:22.080 No, the 30k and started on the 40k, you introduce to a character who's a priest.

00:38:27.260 And he's rigged himself up with a button in his palm.

00:38:34.040 And if he has...

00:38:34.780 If he...

00:38:35.460 Through the course of the day, if he has any thoughts which are not sufficiently zealous about the emperor being a god,

00:38:43.300 he presses it and it fires these electrodes in his groin and I think his heart and his back and other muscles.

00:38:51.000 And he basically almost debilitates himself to the point where he's sick on the floor.

00:38:55.040 And he presses this button like 30 or 40 times a day if he has any thoughts which are not sufficiently pure.

00:39:02.360 The emperor protects.

00:39:03.420 Yes.

00:39:04.340 And also, they burn quite a lot of people.

00:39:10.040 Heresy is...

00:39:11.740 Well, not just for heresy.

00:39:13.380 It's not even just heresy.

00:39:14.940 It's anything that could be considered...

00:39:18.040 Anything that could be considered to go against what the Adeptus Ministorum believed to be, well, gospel.

00:39:27.300 Yes.

00:39:28.200 Very heavily frowned upon.

00:39:29.620 So there is an interesting book.

00:39:31.020 I can't remember the name now.

00:39:31.940 But it isn't interesting, but we're basically a golden age of technology or dark age of technology, depending on which way you look at it.

00:39:40.400 A warship from...

00:39:42.120 Well, not just even a war...

00:39:42.880 A regular ship from the golden age of technology finds itself transported into the future and in the 40k environment.

00:39:51.940 And they turn up after having...

00:39:54.060 Because the warp can do weird shit sometimes.

00:39:56.420 Time doesn't work at all in the warp.

00:39:58.640 You can go into it and expect to come out somewhere, and you've actually come out either sometime in the past or the future or, you know, somewhere else apart from where you were to be.

00:40:08.460 We will explain this later on when we cover the warp.

00:40:11.140 Yes.

00:40:11.680 And in this book, it was rarer back then, but even back in the golden age of technology, that sort of stuff happened.

00:40:20.360 So anyway, out of the warp pops a golden age of technology ship with its advanced technology and everything.

00:40:27.280 And on their passage through the warp, they realised, oh, hang on a minute, this has got a bit lively, this has gone a bit wrong.

00:40:34.180 So they put down on the first planet they come to and sort of rush out to tell everybody, look, be careful, the warp's got a bit dodgy.

00:40:41.400 But because they don't know what you're supposed to say as an imperial citizen, they all get rounded up and burnt.

00:40:50.980 And then the ship's AI is so disgusted with that that it sort of casually destroys an imperial fleet without anyone landing a hit on it.

00:41:00.080 It just buggers off.

00:41:00.800 Now, if they hadn't have been such religious nutters, I mean, that ship alone would have transformed their entire society.

00:41:09.160 They would have won every war forever.

00:41:12.040 That ship probably had technology on it that could have re-revolutionised the imperial of man.

00:41:17.660 Oh, it could have rebuilt the entire thing.

00:41:19.000 And fixed literally everything.

00:41:20.780 Yes.

00:41:21.500 But they burnt the crew instead.

00:41:23.180 Yeah.

00:41:23.500 Because they said some, they must have said something which wasn't whatever the imperial version of the country is.

00:41:29.680 It could have been heresy.

00:41:30.960 Yeah.

00:41:31.220 Well, yes.

00:41:32.360 It could have been whatever.

00:41:33.600 So, yes.

00:41:34.280 So they burn people.

00:41:35.600 They do lots of witch hunts.

00:41:39.080 They waste an enormous amount of productive capacity on this.

00:41:41.820 And it's very rigid and very inflexible.

00:41:44.100 So that is not good.

00:41:47.100 The next thing we've got to fix is the Imperium.

00:41:50.160 No, the Astra Militarum, the Imperium Guard.

00:41:54.260 Now, this one is interesting because we talked about the Space Marines

00:41:59.020 and about how they're, you know, they're all like nine foot tall super kidding machines.

00:42:02.700 Yeah.

00:42:03.000 So they're quite effective.

00:42:05.920 However, even at their height, there was only about like two million of them.

00:42:10.800 Yeah.

00:42:11.580 The Imperium has a million worlds in it.

00:42:15.580 It has a population of maybe two quadrillion.

00:42:18.660 Yeah.

00:42:18.900 And the army at any one time is at least a trillion people strong.

00:42:24.760 So even a million Space Marines, even though they're absolute badasses,

00:42:29.440 even if you're in the military, you will probably go your entire career without ever seeing one.

00:42:35.020 And the length of a lot of these Imperial Guards' careers usually isn't very long.

00:42:42.380 Well, that's the other thing.

00:42:43.500 So the way Imperium likes to fight wars is basically muster up a huge amount of green troops.

00:42:53.000 So we're going to build a new army.

00:42:55.020 So they go around, get a whole load of green troops, badly equipped them.

00:42:57.820 And an army might be a million man strong.

00:43:01.480 And then they basically use them like complete cannon fodder.

00:43:03.840 A lot of the troops of the Imperial Guard have essentially just been conscripted probably weeks prior via massive conscription forces.

00:43:15.140 Yes.

00:43:16.500 Like a fleet commander will come to a planet and go, I need some tithes, which we'll explain in a bit.

00:43:22.680 Yes.

00:43:23.120 I need a tithe of about a million men because we're going to go and fight battle against some orcs on the opposing planet.

00:43:29.440 And, yeah, they will just randomly conscript a million people from a population and go, here's a helmet, here's a lasgun, run at the enemy.

00:43:41.860 Yes.

00:43:42.060 There's a massive orc creature.

00:43:44.020 Yep.

00:43:44.260 Which has spent its entire life fighting.

00:43:49.120 We might give you a bit of basic training, but we probably won't.

00:43:52.740 Off you go.

00:43:53.360 Best of luck.

00:43:54.160 Oops, they all died.

00:43:55.280 Oh, we've just lost.

00:43:56.840 Sorry.

00:43:57.600 Yesterday, we lost two million men.

00:43:59.320 Yes.

00:43:59.680 Oh, no.

00:44:00.460 Let's go and conscript another three million.

00:44:02.080 And the bizarre thing, I mean, and this is, it was thinking about this that first made me think, oh, I need to make the video.

00:44:10.960 Because this series is all about these space marines.

00:44:14.140 But actually, if you just got a tiny, a tiny percentage increase in the combat effectiveness of the guard, and it could be modest.

00:44:23.820 I mean, just basic, basic reforms.

00:44:26.660 Things like, occasionally, they do actually get companies that achieve veteran status.

00:44:32.740 They've been in for 15 years.

00:44:34.840 These guys really know what they're doing.

00:44:37.380 And then some administrator will just say, oh, we don't need you at the moment.

00:44:41.420 And they just span the entire unit.

00:44:42.900 Now, it's rare to get to that point.

00:44:45.820 But the point is, when they do accidentally come up with a base of veterans, rather than using them as training to get the next generation of guys to come through to increase the effectiveness of the guard, they just disband.

00:44:57.740 And most of the time, they don't even get that far.

00:44:59.460 So, very basic reforms of the Astra Militarum would have a force multiplier effect, orders of magnitude more effective than the space marines.

00:45:09.320 Because actually, the vast, vast, vast majority of the fighting done by the Imperium is done by the guard.

00:45:15.680 It's not done by the space marines.

00:45:16.800 It's done by human wave tactics against Xenos forces.

00:45:21.560 Yes.

00:45:22.340 A company of space marines is probably one of the rarest things these people will ever see.

00:45:27.280 When a single space marines appears on a battlefield, it is absolutely game-changing due to how powerful they are compared to a conscript who's just been handed a lad's gun 20 minutes ago.

00:45:40.340 Yeah, so, you know, that one.

00:45:43.280 In fact, I use this as an opportunity to jump off and just give some sort of sense of scale of this universe.

00:45:49.400 Because the thing you've got to understand with 40k is the vastness of it, the absolute vastness of it.

00:45:55.480 And I thought I might illustrate this for an example.

00:45:58.000 So, one thing people sometimes like to do with sci-fi is imagine a crossover.

00:46:01.660 So, let's imagine a crossover where Superman turns up in the world of 40k and for whatever reason, he goes a bit dark and he's disgusted by it and he decides to go to war with the Imperium.

00:46:15.520 What would that actually look like?

00:46:17.800 And I think I've got an answer for this and I'll explain to you.

00:46:19.800 You can tell me if you think I've got this, if you think this is about lore of Acura.

00:46:23.720 So, I think what would happen is Superman would turn up and he would just start ploughing through their forces.

00:46:28.460 And apparently in the lore, Superman can push a planet into the sun.

00:46:32.720 So, he would just start destroying worlds, wiping out armies, devastating fleets.

00:46:37.620 And he might destroy dozens of planets and nobody would notice.

00:46:43.440 And then eventually, after he's wiped out a couple of hundred planets, some mid-level bureaucrat would start to notice.

00:46:52.100 A little box on his little computer in one of the giant hive cities would start flashing red.

00:46:58.260 And he'd go, oh, oh, and go back to what he's doing.

00:47:00.980 Yes.

00:47:02.220 And eventually, he would get fed up with his underlings coming to him saying that they're having to reorganise tithes or tithes haven't turned up or whatever it is.

00:47:09.680 And he might file a report.

00:47:13.340 And once Superman has destroyed, like, I don't know, several hundred worlds, maybe a thousand worlds,

00:47:18.460 a report might get sent back to the High Lords of Terror.

00:47:22.440 And one or two of them could possibly skim-read it, but there's no way they would discuss it in council because they've got bigger concerns.

00:47:28.240 Yeah, there are more important things to talk about than a couple of hundred worlds being destroyed.

00:47:32.160 Yes.

00:47:33.480 But eventually, this mid-level bureaucrat would think, oh, well, we're probably going to do so.

00:47:36.680 So, what he would do is he would appoint a committee to investigate it of some sort.

00:47:41.180 You'd get a committee together, and they would study the problem for 500 years.

00:47:46.520 And during that time, they would lose their research entirely several times.

00:47:50.680 They'd probably come up with a solution once or twice and then lose it, or they would try and deploy it, and the ship it got deployed would just get lost.

00:47:57.920 Yeah.

00:47:58.020 But eventually, after about 500 years, they'd figure out kryptonite.

00:48:01.540 And then they would shut down Superman, and, you know, they've lost a couple of thousand planets.

00:48:08.180 Trillions dead.

00:48:08.860 Yes, trillions dead, and it would never get to the top level of the bureaucracy.

00:48:14.820 It would be a mid-level problem, and then the solution to this would be filed away, and it would be put in a book.

00:48:20.180 It would then be buried in a vault, and then a couple of centuries later, everyone would have forgotten all about it entirely.

00:48:26.680 Now, does that sound accurate to you as what would happen if Superman turned up and went back?

00:48:30.840 Yes.

00:48:31.200 The only other thing I might suggest would happen is that if anyone started to question why no one was doing anything,

00:48:38.500 they would probably be called a heretic.

00:48:41.820 And burnt.

00:48:42.440 And burnt.

00:48:43.180 Yes.

00:48:43.820 Yes.

00:48:44.440 Because you're probably an agent of chaos, suggesting we're doing something wrong.

00:48:49.360 Yes.

00:48:49.860 Exactly.

00:48:50.500 Yes.

00:48:51.160 Yes.

00:48:51.540 The Emperor protects, and, you know, you're making these suggestions.

00:48:54.740 So the Imperial Guard, it's a trillion people, and it's all quantity over quality for the techniques.

00:49:01.560 It is probably the most complete form of the term quantity over quality ever written in any form of fiction.

00:49:11.280 Yes.

00:49:11.780 Literally hundreds of worlds just completely harvested for basically human wave tactics on a scale Stalin could only dream of.

00:49:22.100 Yes.

00:49:22.220 And, of course, if they're doing that, they're not doing anything.

00:49:26.620 They're not being productive.

00:49:28.300 They're not doing anything else.

00:49:30.240 They're not churning out equipment or foodstuffs.

00:49:32.400 Yes.

00:49:32.820 There are some units, as you said, that do get a little bit of notoriety, but most of these are forgotten.

00:49:41.680 Well, if you've got an army a trillion strong, you're going to accidentally have some good units.

00:49:44.900 You might have one planet, like the forces of Kreeg, who have figured out cloning, and they clone soldiers instead of conscripting them, and that's probably better.

00:49:55.840 Yes.

00:49:56.460 But they still are war nutters and do everything in the most incomprehensibly inefficient way possible.

00:50:06.580 Yes.

00:50:08.140 Bringing us to the Imperial Navy, many of the same problems as the Guard, woefully inefficient.

00:50:18.900 So some planets will be dedicated to building a new capital ship, and it will take them 300 years to do it.

00:50:26.040 And, you know, it won't be standardized in any way.

00:50:29.420 It will be a completely bespoke project, and, you know, this guy and his kids and his grandkids and his great-grandkids

00:50:35.880 will spend their entire lives working on this capital ship, and then they deploy it, and due to a logistics foul-up,

00:50:43.460 it will get lost in the warp in its first week.

00:50:45.680 Yes.

00:50:46.200 And then they just build another warp.

00:50:47.040 Yeah, the hundreds of thousands of people manning that ship will just be lost.

00:50:50.740 Yes.

00:50:51.180 All the talent, everyone trained to run it, gone.

00:50:54.280 Well, yes, to the extent that they train, rather than just funneling new people into it.

00:51:01.120 And a massive problem with the construction of these ships as well comes back to the Mechanicum,

00:51:05.880 because they refuse to innovate on these ships, and they're relying on, like, millennia-old STCs to build them.

00:51:12.960 Yes.

00:51:13.540 They are essentially...

00:51:15.320 It's kind of like an African nation using a little wooden boat against an aircraft carrier.

00:51:23.480 Yes.

00:51:23.880 In the modern day.

00:51:25.160 But the Imperium are still using 10,000-year-old designs for ships.

00:51:31.000 So that could be significantly better than they are, but the Mechanicum refused to...

00:51:34.560 And because they won't innovate, the best they can do is copy.

00:51:39.260 After 10,000 years, accumulated errors in copying add up to quite serious design flaws.

00:51:46.060 Yes.

00:51:46.760 Entire fleets lost to the warp because of a minor miscalculation from the astropath who's guiding them through it.

00:51:53.880 Yes, or the void shields or whatever it is.

00:51:58.160 There's a slight fluctuation.

00:51:59.880 A bit of void lightning hits a ship.

00:52:01.780 Millions dead.

00:52:03.800 And, you know, how are we doing for time?

00:52:07.740 We've almost finished framing the problem before we get onto the scale of it, and then we can come to our solution.

00:52:12.500 The Inquisition.

00:52:16.340 Well, actually, no, actually, before I do the Inquisition, I will just mention on the Guard and the Navy, this sounds very wasteful, but I should point out, I mean, they have actually got a lot of wars to fight.

00:52:30.620 Yes.

00:52:31.340 Almost the entire galaxy is in flames constantly, all the time.

00:52:36.500 There is always a war spanning multiple galaxies wide at all times, and there are multiple of these happening all over the galaxy.

00:52:47.140 There are space marines of every different color and stripe fighting everywhere.

00:52:52.340 There are literally trillions of battles.

00:52:54.220 Well, who have we got?

00:52:55.460 So we've got the remnants of Horus' lot.

00:52:59.420 Yes.

00:52:59.840 They're still around.

00:53:00.800 They went off into the warp.

00:53:03.220 Yes.

00:53:03.460 They fucked off into the warp after they were thoroughly defeated and routed at the end of the Horus' Heresy.

00:53:09.640 But they keep popping up and doing shit.

00:53:11.240 They keep popping up, because they went into the warp.

00:53:13.160 Yes.

00:53:13.780 They got very friendly with the various warp gods, like Slaanesh or Khorne or Nurgle, and they've reappeared at various points of time going, we want to do some nasty things.

00:53:27.120 Some chaos-y shit.

00:53:27.980 We want to...

00:53:28.940 So they're bad.

00:53:29.560 Yeah.

00:53:29.700 We've also got the space perverts that I talked about earlier, the Eldar.

00:53:33.740 The Eldar, which, I might add, Carl is currently building and painting an army of.

00:53:38.420 Right.

00:53:39.780 The orcs, which we mentioned.

00:53:41.700 Yep.

00:53:42.540 Mushroom people from space.

00:53:44.120 They sprout out of the ground and...

00:53:46.660 How should we describe them?

00:53:47.800 They're sort of low-time-preference individuals.

00:53:50.580 They...

00:53:52.580 I don't...

00:53:55.400 Okay.

00:53:55.760 I won't compare them to certain other groups of people on planet Earth.

00:54:00.680 Oh, God, no.

00:54:01.300 I wouldn't.

00:54:01.780 No, no, no.

00:54:02.220 That would be...

00:54:03.580 That would be...

00:54:04.160 No.

00:54:04.680 No.

00:54:05.360 No.

00:54:05.660 We'll get cancelled for that.

00:54:06.460 But they essentially, through sheer willpower alone, turn hunks of scrap metal into fighting machines to go on their wags.

00:54:18.240 Yeah, I mean, we won't go too much into that, but the law's quite gone...

00:54:23.060 I mean, they're actually a creation of a much older species to fight at war.

00:54:28.020 And they sort of programmed in genetic memory into them.

00:54:31.480 Yeah.

00:54:31.820 So they do actually know how to build shit.

00:54:35.560 Not consciously.

00:54:36.760 They do it like a dog does stuff.

00:54:39.220 It's like, unconsciously, they do stuff.

00:54:42.240 Hammering bits of metal together, and it somehow creates a gun.

00:54:46.120 Or it creates a plane.

00:54:47.560 Yes.

00:54:47.780 But it's all genetic memory.

00:54:49.440 Yeah.

00:54:49.960 You've got tyrannies, which you mentioned.

00:54:52.720 So they're basically...

00:54:54.120 How do you...

00:54:56.060 They're sort of...

00:54:57.080 They are a...

00:54:57.760 They just don't want to eat everything.

00:54:59.380 Their primary goal is to consume biomass and procreate so the hive mind can spread ever further.

00:55:06.720 That is literally it.

00:55:07.760 They are the space bugs whose only purpose is to consume biomass.

00:55:13.020 So all they want to do is eat, fornicate, and take over new lands.

00:55:20.100 Yes.

00:55:20.540 And do they turn up in small boats or...

00:55:22.540 No, they turn up in what we call hive fleets.

00:55:25.780 Right.

00:55:26.160 Which are planetary-sized, giant, tyranid spore ships.

00:55:30.680 From the way they've been described, presumably they're immediately granted asylum and given preference in two-tier justice and all that sort of stuff.

00:55:37.780 Are they all...

00:55:38.240 Well, how they usually work, if they don't just throw themselves onto a planet and rampage immediately, the Imperium has gotten somewhat good at repelling that.

00:55:46.720 Yes.

00:55:46.940 What they'll do is they'll infiltrate society by slowly dispersing themselves amongst the local populace and slowly corrupting them one by one and turn...

00:55:58.180 Well, tyranids do that.

00:55:58.860 Yes.

00:55:59.260 They turn a group of people into a gene-stealer cult.

00:56:04.380 Oh, okay.

00:56:04.920 This is brain worms or something, is it?

00:56:06.140 Yes, yes, essentially.

00:56:07.100 And then, over time, they slowly corrupt an entire planet whilst laying tyranid eggs under the soil, under the ground.

00:56:13.520 Yes.

00:56:13.860 And all of a sudden, people with psychic powers on a planet will suddenly begin sensing a hive fleet approaching.

00:56:23.000 And it's too late because the tyranids have already propagated under the soil and it all collapses all at once.

00:56:29.300 Which, actually, this novel here, Rose in the Darkness, is pretty good for talking about that.

00:56:34.080 Gene-stealer cult is found on a holy shrine world by almost pure coincidence from these Sists of Battle.

00:56:41.820 Yes.

00:56:42.120 And they have to essentially escape with a holy relic.

00:56:45.280 So they're also bad.

00:56:46.820 And then we've also got something called the Necrons, which is the enemy...

00:56:51.560 So I mentioned that older species earlier on.

00:56:53.900 Yes.

00:56:54.320 The Necrons were basically sort of like a client species who rebelled, but they are one of the original races of the galaxy.

00:57:01.980 Yeah, they are very, very ancient.

00:57:05.300 They used to have flesh, but at some point, they replaced their flesh with shiny silver bodies.

00:57:11.240 They look like silver skeleton dudes.

00:57:13.300 There'll probably be an image of one on the screen now.

00:57:16.120 Super advanced.

00:57:17.320 Yes.

00:57:17.500 Not many of them.

00:57:18.160 They are what the Mechanicum...

00:57:19.980 Wants to be.

00:57:20.600 Wants to be.

00:57:21.340 Yes.

00:57:21.560 Which is why senior members of the Mechanicum have sort of adversarial rivalries with senior members of the Necrons.

00:57:30.120 Yes.

00:57:30.520 And there's a couple of novels on that.

00:57:31.720 I haven't read any, but I intend to.

00:57:33.880 So, and that's just, I think, the main one.

00:57:37.080 There's probably more that I haven't thought of.

00:57:38.860 There is also the Tau.

00:57:40.860 Oh, well, yeah.

00:57:41.940 Sob the Tau.

00:57:42.480 Yeah.

00:57:42.980 They're boring space communists, but they're not really communists.

00:57:46.340 And leftists will argue about that on Twitter, but yeah.

00:57:49.480 So it is actually the case that it's like five minutes to midnight for the Imperium.

00:57:56.560 Yes.

00:57:56.820 And if they aren't constantly churning out soldiers and ships, they will be exterminated.

00:58:03.200 Yes.

00:58:03.600 But that puts them at the point where because they need to constantly churn out Navy and Guard assets,

00:58:10.280 they have to do it at a level which basically stop all of that, all of what would be growth.

00:58:17.440 You know, the surplus capital that you reinvest in the next generation.

00:58:22.440 None of that actually happens because they have to take so much at any time to fight all these various wars,

00:58:30.020 but they're just permanently statically stuck, if not declining, which is bad from an economic point of view.

00:58:37.220 It's very bad.

00:58:37.960 Yes.

00:58:38.100 Yes.

00:58:40.000 Sorry, Inquisition.

00:58:41.780 We've got sidetracked.

00:58:42.420 So we talked about the ecclesiarchy, you know, the pilgrims and the burners and all the rest of it,

00:58:48.260 but they are the cuddly, friendly version of religion compared to the Inquisition.

00:58:53.880 What's the Inquisition?

00:58:55.160 The Inquisition are a group of people whose sole purpose is to essentially root out heresy or chaos

00:59:01.600 or anything that could go against the order, anything that could go against the will of the Holy Emperor and exterminate it before it even has a chance to propagate itself.

00:59:15.120 Yes.

00:59:15.260 And they can get a little bit zealous on this stuff.

00:59:18.480 Just a little bit.

00:59:19.840 I mean, whole planets have been burnt because an Inquisitor suspected that there might be heresy on it.

00:59:27.600 Yes.

00:59:27.900 And this is usually what's called an exterminatus.

00:59:31.040 Yes.

00:59:31.260 Slight suspicion of heresy, a fleet will appear in orbit and go, sorry, everyone's dying.

00:59:39.000 Yes.

00:59:39.420 We can't allow the possibility of heresy to start on this planet.

00:59:44.880 We have to kill every living thing on the planet.

00:59:47.460 They're a bit Soviet like that.

00:59:48.600 In fact, you often find a, you know, a junior Inquisition member, you know, like in the Soviet times where the best equipped men would not be the men on the front line.

00:59:59.620 There'd be the men just behind the front line who shot the men on the front line if they weren't fighting hard enough.

01:00:05.040 It's basically that, but just a bit more, a bit more extreme.

01:00:08.860 Except it's not, they're not doing it out of a sense of corruption like the Soviets were.

01:00:13.620 Yes.

01:00:13.840 They're doing it out of a more of a, because they are the most ardent believers.

01:00:18.460 Yes.

01:00:20.060 Aside from the higher ranking members of the ecclesiarchy of this, essentially, religion that revolves around the emperor of mankind.

01:00:28.880 And you kind of want to hate them.

01:00:30.460 However, chaos is actually real and corruption is actually real.

01:00:36.940 Yeah.

01:00:37.220 And if you do let it fester, then you'll be dealing with demons before long.

01:00:42.120 On a certain level, their zero tolerance policy does work.

01:00:47.840 Because on the off chance, there is actually heresy on that planet.

01:00:51.340 Yes.

01:00:51.880 And the one, like, sub-level officer was actually a heretic.

01:00:56.540 So them killing everyone on the planet was worth it.

01:00:59.560 Yes.

01:01:00.360 In their eyes, it was worth it to stop the heresy, which is very important.

01:01:04.200 Because it is actually a real problem.

01:01:05.860 Because if chaos propagates itself on a world, that could lead to much worse consequences.

01:01:12.320 You could lose hundreds of worlds.

01:01:13.400 Yes.

01:01:13.620 Yes.

01:01:14.060 Yes.

01:01:14.360 Yeah.

01:01:14.680 So they have kind of got a problem.

01:01:16.980 But it is a bit wasteful.

01:01:19.860 This is going to be a bit of a bigger one.

01:01:22.640 The administratum.

01:01:24.440 So basically, the imperial bureaucracy.

01:01:26.760 So, I mean, we can see in Britain today how bad a bureaucracy at the level of the UK is.

01:01:35.100 But imagine it's scaled up to planet and now a million planets.

01:01:38.740 And also, they don't have faster than light communication.

01:01:41.780 Well, they can use psychers through the war.

01:01:46.020 But you might well kill one trying to send an email.

01:01:49.520 So, generally, your communications.

01:01:53.120 I mean, whole wars have happened and reinforcement requests have been put in.

01:02:00.500 And then centuries have passed before the reinforcement request makes it back to terror.

01:02:04.460 And they send off the reinforcements.

01:02:06.400 They arrive and the planet's a wasteland and everyone's dead.

01:02:09.200 Yes.

01:02:09.760 Like centuries ago.

01:02:10.860 Yeah.

01:02:11.000 So, yes.

01:02:11.840 And basically, these guys are trying to administer a million worlds from terror massively, massively inefficiently.

01:02:24.960 Yeah.

01:02:25.380 It's like the NHS times several million, but only on the bureaucrat side.

01:02:32.120 Not the actual people doing the helpful stuff.

01:02:34.100 Yes.

01:02:34.280 Like saving lives.

01:02:34.980 Well, that's probably the same number.

01:02:36.120 Yeah.

01:02:37.660 But the scale is so incomprehensibly large.

01:02:41.840 A slight error in someone's handwriting could lead to a planet disappearing from records forever.

01:02:48.420 Yes.

01:02:48.980 I mean, lucky them.

01:02:49.960 Yes.

01:02:50.480 Yeah.

01:02:51.220 Explain the tithe system.

01:02:53.180 So, tithes is how the Imperium makes its money and how it pays for everything it does.

01:03:00.680 Every Imperial world is required on some level to give a tithe to the administratum so that the Imperium function.

01:03:08.940 Is that taxes then?

01:03:10.280 Yes.

01:03:10.760 It's space taxes.

01:03:11.620 Right.

01:03:12.280 But it's not money.

01:03:14.720 It's something.

01:03:16.200 Well, it's sometimes money.

01:03:18.280 Right.

01:03:18.520 But money is quite a complicated thing in the Imperium of Man because there's no centralized currency.

01:03:24.660 Yes.

01:03:25.140 Every planet could have its own currency and basically currency doesn't work in the Imperium of Man.

01:03:30.300 So, tithes could be anything from this planet.

01:03:34.040 I need you to make the bolt that goes on the side of this man's gun.

01:03:39.240 Yes.

01:03:39.500 I want millions of people making that one bolt.

01:03:40.000 I want millions of people making that one bolt.

01:03:42.300 Yes.

01:03:42.500 And I need to take that from you as a tithe.

01:03:44.840 And every 30 years, I'll come around and I expect a trillion of them in this box.

01:03:50.240 Yes.

01:03:50.780 Get to it.

01:03:51.240 I was told by someone in chat on the podcast today, which I did check.

01:03:54.560 There are entire planets or hive cities that are dedicated only to farming bees for their wax to make the purity seals for space marine and others' armor.

01:04:07.020 Entire planets that are getting to making singular components.

01:04:12.680 Yes.

01:04:13.600 It's quite incomprehensibly large in terms of scale, this tithe system.

01:04:18.680 And actually, they would be one of the lucky ones, wouldn't they?

01:04:21.300 Because if your job is to churn out bees, you know, obviously, if you don't like bees, that's not that great.

01:04:29.560 But that planet has no choice but to like bees.

01:04:31.740 Yes.

01:04:31.920 But your tithe could easily be we're collecting a million men a year.

01:04:37.580 Yes.

01:04:37.880 The Imperial Guard is fighting a war over some pointless objective on this planet outside you.

01:04:43.220 We need a million men, please.

01:04:45.620 Yes.

01:04:45.920 And women and children, by the way.

01:04:47.760 Yes.

01:04:48.080 It doesn't matter what you are.

01:04:50.820 And if you resist, you will be basically slaughtered.

01:04:55.040 Well, I mean, it gets even worse than that.

01:04:57.120 I mean, I don't know if it's a tithe, but we mentioned the emperor on his chair.

01:05:03.100 And in order to preserve his life essence, the little bit that they've actually got, they're sacrificing a thousand people to him a day.

01:05:11.860 Yes.

01:05:12.120 These are psychers.

01:05:13.320 So people who have the ability to sense and use psychic energy more than a regular person.

01:05:18.660 These are the people most susceptible to warp corruption.

01:05:21.300 But that's another thing to talk about.

01:05:24.380 A thousand people in these days get fed into the chair.

01:05:27.420 Yeah.

01:05:27.700 A thousand of these specialist psychic ability users are harvested from planets daily to essentially be ground up into energy to keep the emperor alive.

01:05:37.100 Yes.

01:05:38.540 So the tithe system, massively bureaucratic, inefficient, and it strangles it.

01:05:43.500 And so even if, you know, everything we talked about so far, the bulk of the ecclesiarchy and the witch hunts and the burnings and the inquisition, any possible economic growth, even if it wasn't being strangled by the mechanicum because of tech heresy,

01:06:02.320 that everything else is being taxed away to oblivion.

01:06:06.560 Yes.

01:06:07.040 It's like this.

01:06:07.920 I mean, actually, I don't know if she reads it, but 40K is like Rachel Reeves' dream come true.

01:06:15.080 Yes.

01:06:16.280 The state continuously held together by infinity taxes.

01:06:22.000 Yes.

01:06:22.420 This is literally Labour communist wet dream.

01:06:25.520 Well, I mean, yeah, because I mean, what Labour really want is they see a big state as an end in itself.

01:06:32.320 I mean, this is just absolutely everything they've ever wanted.

01:06:36.300 If someone was to read a description of the Imperium of Man's Economy to Rachel Reeves.

01:06:43.300 Yes.

01:06:43.680 She would probably collapse in a quivering mess on the floor.

01:06:47.000 Oh, yeah.

01:06:47.980 If you were to read this out at Labour conference, you'd have to first of all check that everybody's underwear was on the pill.

01:06:54.480 Yeah, yeah.

01:06:55.220 Yes.

01:06:58.240 The warp.

01:06:59.240 That's our seventh pillar.

01:07:01.180 Yeah.

01:07:01.380 I mean, it's bad because it's the source of chaos, corruption, demonic influence, warp gods.

01:07:11.200 Also quite handy if you want to get around anywhere.

01:07:14.960 How is this an economic drag?

01:07:16.740 Well, basically, because it's such an incomprehensible mess, and that's putting it lightly, to travel across it, trillions of resources in every capacity are wasted because people die because they blink in the wrong way in the warp.

01:07:34.600 It's honestly the worst part.

01:07:38.420 It's the most efficient but worst way to travel across the universe because you just die for the most trivial reasons.

01:07:43.980 The resources needed to travel across the warp is pretty nutty anyway because basically it's a similar thing to holding together the Emperor.

01:07:54.220 They need about several thousand psychos to power the astronomicon to even let people navigate the warp, and that's hard enough as it is.

01:08:02.820 As we said, ships can go missing for 10,000 years because they went past the wrong warp storm in the warp.

01:08:08.840 What's the best analogy in real life to the warp?

01:08:20.500 Mainstream media?

01:08:21.600 I don't know.

01:08:22.020 It distorts everything.

01:08:23.260 I suppose it's demonic.

01:08:24.720 It tries to corrupt you if you look into it.

01:08:28.440 If you look out the window in a warp ship, you're probably going to turn into...

01:08:31.920 It's like watching Sky News.

01:08:32.580 Sky News.

01:08:32.940 Yes.

01:08:33.600 Yes.

01:08:34.520 Not Sky News Australia, but Sky News in England.

01:08:36.740 No, they're quite good actually.

01:08:37.680 Yes.

01:08:37.960 It's like watching Sky News in the UK and going, what the fuck am I doing with my life?

01:08:42.500 And then turning into a horrible fleshy creature and that tries to eat the people next to you.

01:08:46.820 Yes.

01:08:47.640 Right.

01:08:48.040 So, now we've got to fix it.

01:08:50.360 So, this is the fun bit.

01:08:51.780 And how...

01:08:55.900 Because we are doing a Brokonomics episode.

01:08:58.420 So, we've got to figure out how we're going to fix all this stuff.

01:09:00.340 But the Mechanicum.

01:09:03.080 So, I've had to think about this.

01:09:04.240 I've got my seven point plan together.

01:09:06.180 Let's have a look.

01:09:10.380 Right.

01:09:10.880 So, obviously, the Mechanicum has got to go, but you can't get rid of them because nobody else has any tech base.

01:09:17.940 You've got to start to diversify production beyond Mars.

01:09:22.040 Yes.

01:09:22.340 So, there is production beyond Mars on what we call Forge Worlds, which are all centrally controlled by Mars.

01:09:31.000 Right.

01:09:31.260 And Mechanicum.

01:09:32.040 So, they're essentially just extensions doing the exact same thing.

01:09:35.080 It's like a satellite factory for a big corporation.

01:09:38.040 It is still essentially just Mars, but on a different planet.

01:09:40.960 They might be producing stuff for, like, one part of the galaxy where they make tanks and various bits for space marines.

01:09:50.180 But you do get the odd progressive tech priest.

01:09:54.160 Yeah.

01:09:54.760 Who's willing to innovate.

01:09:55.720 You'll occasionally get someone like Belisarius Kruhl.

01:09:58.500 Yes.

01:09:59.080 Who, with, well, after lots of poking from Robute Guilman, might go, oh, hang on a second.

01:10:08.180 Let's actually innovate here and make prior various marines.

01:10:11.560 Yes.

01:10:11.700 But even those were essentially stifled for 10,000 years.

01:10:14.520 Well, yeah.

01:10:15.500 So, he's got an interesting philosophy because the dogma says that you mustn't innovate or invent anything

01:10:22.500 because everything that can be invented has already been invented by the Emperor.

01:10:27.680 And he says, well, if I invent something, I'm not actually inventing it.

01:10:31.540 I'm just happenstancing through trial and error upon something that the Emperor has already invented

01:10:37.120 and, therefore, there's no heresy and, therefore, I can do it.

01:10:40.500 Yes.

01:10:41.140 So, he's galaxy-brained himself into a position of extreme power.

01:10:44.900 Yes.

01:10:45.240 Where he is the one.

01:10:46.040 He's allowed to do it.

01:10:47.120 Yes.

01:10:47.680 But he, no, I'm not doing it.

01:10:49.540 Sorry.

01:10:49.980 Yes.

01:10:50.180 Well, if, so, I mean, you've got to, and you've got to frame, so you can't, for example,

01:10:54.980 develop an AI, but if you framed it correctly, I mean, that is basically what you've got to do.

01:11:01.220 What they've got to do is they've got to take all of these machine spirits.

01:11:06.140 They've got to start looking at the bloody code, finding clean segments, you know, get 10,000

01:11:13.480 of these machine spirits, pass the code, pick out, I mean, debug it, find the clean segments,

01:11:19.400 start overwriting the most clean bits of that one onto the most corrupted bits of that one

01:11:23.840 and start patching it together.

01:11:26.440 Alternatively, I mean, you've had 10,000 years, just recreate AI, just innovate.

01:11:31.220 What they do do is you, when they create something new, is call them recovered STCs, as we mentioned

01:11:40.300 at the start.

01:11:41.020 Yes.

01:11:42.200 It's another way of saying, yeah, we found this in a space Hulk somewhere many, many, many,

01:11:48.380 many miles away.

01:11:49.400 Yes.

01:11:50.000 We didn't make it ourselves.

01:11:51.260 Yes.

01:11:51.660 That's how you get like a new type of LAS gun or...

01:11:54.300 So just be a bit, you know, nod and a wink on that sort of stuff.

01:11:58.120 Just let people get on with it and just remind them that when you've invented something new,

01:12:03.500 just pretend you found it.

01:12:04.920 Yeah.

01:12:05.140 You can still operate within this oppressive, religious, dogmatic society.

01:12:11.560 Just know how to nudge the right people.

01:12:15.380 And for God's sake, start debugging your machine spirits.

01:12:18.000 Oh, yes.

01:12:18.300 And all they would need to do is invent AI up to the level that we currently have it.

01:12:26.620 Whereas it's not really fully thinking, it's just doing...

01:12:30.940 No, no, no.

01:12:31.320 What I mean is all they would need to do is invent AI up to the level that we currently have

01:12:34.840 it today.

01:12:35.480 Okay.

01:12:35.920 And that would be enough to then look at the code in all of these machine spirits and

01:12:41.340 pass together the good bits from the bad and reassemble it into something new.

01:12:45.640 Yeah.

01:12:45.880 It's not activating Skynet again like they did with the Men of Iron.

01:12:52.420 Well, and to be fair, humanity did have 10,000 pretty good years when the AI wasn't rebelling.

01:12:57.740 Yeah.

01:12:58.520 So, you know, maybe think about that.

01:13:01.240 So, yeah.

01:13:02.260 So if we were running the Imperium, we're going to establish a collegiate rediscovery, which

01:13:10.840 is basically going to be invent stuff and then pretend you found it.

01:13:14.900 Yes.

01:13:15.880 Yes.

01:13:16.740 Which is honestly the perfect solution for even the tech priests of Mars who actually

01:13:22.000 want to invent things, but no, they can't.

01:13:24.320 Yes.

01:13:25.760 Who is...

01:13:26.480 No one's going to argue with them because they've already got a free pass from Gilliman

01:13:29.340 to go...

01:13:30.020 Yes.

01:13:31.000 ...start giving me new things.

01:13:32.460 Yes.

01:13:32.820 Because at the start of the new bits of lore, after the Great Rift across the galaxy, he's

01:13:38.680 basically like, yeah, I need some new things now, please.

01:13:40.500 And he...

01:13:42.820 It is the perfect excuse, yeah.

01:13:45.180 So we've fixed the Mechanicum.

01:13:47.460 So there we go.

01:13:48.000 We're one-seventh of our way...

01:13:49.800 We're making rings in all times as well.

01:13:51.300 One-seventh of our way of fixing the Imperium.

01:13:53.660 The Ecclesiarchy.

01:13:57.180 Everybody's lives are shit.

01:14:00.880 But because they have such faith in the Emperor, they're willing to put up with an awful lot

01:14:06.140 of shit.

01:14:06.660 Because the Emperor protects.

01:14:08.020 Yes.

01:14:08.840 At the same time, the Ecclesiarchy is holding everybody back with their dogma.

01:14:14.580 Yeah.

01:14:14.680 But...

01:14:15.080 So you can't let them exist, but you can't get rid of them either, because then everybody

01:14:20.960 will be like, okay, well, now my life is just shit, and I haven't got faith, and the whole

01:14:25.460 thing will collapse.

01:14:26.360 Yeah.

01:14:27.040 So, um...

01:14:28.260 Which is...

01:14:28.840 Yes.

01:14:29.540 ...consequently how chaos takes root.

01:14:31.900 Yes.

01:14:32.080 When the faith in the Emperor collapses on a planet, that's how chaos suddenly appears.

01:14:37.320 Usually it's chaos that's caused the faith in the Emperor to collapse, but that allows

01:14:40.980 the enemies of the Imperium to start doing the nasty things they want to do.

01:14:46.500 So, again, I've come up with a solution to this one, and I'll run this by you.

01:14:52.080 I mentioned my custodies before, you know, what I've decided is going to be my new faction.

01:14:59.820 Yep.

01:15:00.140 If I ever get into the tabletop version.

01:15:02.580 Now these are super soldiers, but they're actually super super soldiers.

01:15:08.100 Yeah, they are space marines.

01:15:09.780 They are space marines, space marines.

01:15:11.400 Yes.

01:15:12.520 And they are the Emperor's companions.

01:15:14.900 They're the guys who surround the Emperor.

01:15:16.880 Yes.

01:15:17.400 And these guys are perfectly well aware that the Emperor is not a god.

01:15:21.640 Yes.

01:15:22.100 And they're also fully aware...

01:15:23.460 They are probably the most aware people to the current situation in the universe, but

01:15:28.640 their loyalty to the Emperor stops them from acting...

01:15:30.920 Well, they've got a tiny problem, you see, in that even though they are super beings, the

01:15:37.200 Emperor designed them to be fiercely loyal to him...

01:15:40.580 Yeah.

01:15:41.080 ...in the expectation that he would be around doing stuff, and he could say, we're going

01:15:45.000 to do this stuff, and then they would get on board with that.

01:15:47.460 But when he died, they became fiercely loyal to the Emperor's person, not the Emperor's

01:15:52.480 will.

01:15:52.820 Yeah.

01:15:53.080 The Emperor's mission.

01:15:55.080 And so they spent 10,000 years basically just guarding the body.

01:15:58.560 Yeah.

01:15:59.440 When they could be doing a lot more.

01:16:00.860 So my solution for the Ecclesiarchy is put them in at a sector level.

01:16:07.480 You've only got 10,000 of them.

01:16:08.640 You haven't got many of them.

01:16:09.560 Yeah.

01:16:10.120 But you could put them overseeing the Ecclesiarchy for, say, 10,000 worlds at a time.

01:16:15.800 And they would sit at the top of the hierarchy.

01:16:20.400 And the reason I'd use custodians is, one, they are completely incorruptible and untouchable.

01:16:25.860 You can't claim that they don't know the Emperor's will, because they're literally custodies.

01:16:29.780 Yeah.

01:16:30.120 And secondly, the other big problem you have when you're trying to reform anything in the

01:16:35.420 Imperium, and lots of High Lords over the years have tried to do this, is that they

01:16:39.980 immediately get assassinated.

01:16:42.080 Yes.

01:16:42.480 Whereas, good luck trying to assassinate a custodians.

01:16:46.200 Yes.

01:16:46.600 Very few of them have been killed in the lore, ever.

01:16:49.520 Yes.

01:16:49.860 Because they are essentially the most badass space warriors in the universe on the human

01:16:56.160 side.

01:16:56.760 Yes.

01:16:57.780 So I fixed the...

01:16:59.840 Do you think that would work if we fixed it by sticking a custodians in over, say, 10,000

01:17:05.360 worlds at a time?

01:17:06.000 Yeah.

01:17:06.020 Having a ranking custodians be the head of a military occupation.

01:17:11.940 Well, no, head of the ecclesiarch.

01:17:13.960 Oh, yeah, yeah.

01:17:14.480 I'd actually keep them out of the military and have them just as overseeing.

01:17:17.860 So I basically...

01:17:18.620 Oh, yeah, yeah.

01:17:19.040 As symbols of the Emperor themselves, yes, I think that would work, yes.

01:17:24.000 So I would actually...

01:17:25.080 I mean, I'll come back to this when we get to the Inquisition.

01:17:29.300 But basically, you stick them as the head of the Inquisition in the Church.

01:17:31.840 There are 10,000 worlds each.

01:17:33.360 And their job is basically to be...

01:17:35.700 I mean, nobody can question, but they don't understand the Emperor's will.

01:17:37.940 So they're there to stop the worst excesses and basically try and steer the Church over

01:17:43.860 time.

01:17:44.540 So it retains the morale-boosting effects of at least people who've got something to

01:17:50.780 live for.

01:17:51.760 But because they're not attached to the religion, they're able to actually poke them in ways

01:17:58.120 that they wouldn't be thinking about because they're so focused on their devotion.

01:18:01.460 If they're thinking of burning an entire city or planet or whatever because, you know,

01:18:04.940 possible...

01:18:05.800 Yeah, possible heresy.

01:18:06.820 Yes.

01:18:07.360 These guys would step in and say, no, no, come on, don't be silly.

01:18:09.280 Yeah.

01:18:09.700 Yes.

01:18:10.240 Yeah.

01:18:10.980 So they...

01:18:12.340 And what they would have to do is they'd have to frame all of their reforms as being a

01:18:16.660 clarification of the Emperor's will.

01:18:18.740 Yes.

01:18:19.380 They can't...

01:18:19.720 Yes.

01:18:20.300 That's a good way.

01:18:21.740 We are clarifying exactly what he means.

01:18:24.900 You can't question that we don't know what he means because that would be heresy.

01:18:28.240 Yes.

01:18:28.980 Yes, exactly.

01:18:30.140 So I think that...

01:18:30.980 So what do you reckon?

01:18:31.760 Would that work?

01:18:32.300 I think so, yes.

01:18:33.180 Right.

01:18:33.440 Good.

01:18:33.920 We've now fixed two of the major...

01:18:35.400 Right.

01:18:36.060 Three.

01:18:37.600 Professionalize the Astro Militarium to the Guard.

01:18:40.980 Right.

01:18:41.140 So this is my problem with the Guard, right?

01:18:43.540 Is that, as I said, even a tiny, tiny increase in the effectiveness in the Guard would be a

01:18:51.480 massive force multiplier.

01:18:53.140 Yeah.

01:18:53.720 Because the small units who do get very good at what they do and don't get...

01:18:59.600 Administratum'd into oblivion do actually become highly successful fighting forces.

01:19:04.600 Yes.

01:19:04.920 So we have examples of this like Quartz Ghosts, Katajang Jungle Fighters, or even the Krieg

01:19:11.560 again.

01:19:12.560 We know it can work, but the scale of it usually prohibits it from happening.

01:19:18.100 Well, so my thinking here is twofold.

01:19:21.160 And I've got two solutions here.

01:19:22.560 One is just sane military reorganizations.

01:19:29.140 Yeah.

01:19:29.320 Which is something like whenever you get somebody who's approaching veteran status, you whisk

01:19:35.280 them out and you make them, you know, like we've seen all those movies where you've got

01:19:38.920 a sergeant who shouts at you and gets the...

01:19:41.800 Drill sergeant.

01:19:42.320 Yes.

01:19:43.300 Just make them all drill sergeants.

01:19:44.480 And spend some time actually training people up.

01:19:47.840 Before they have a chance to die in a wasteful death.

01:19:50.840 Yes.

01:19:51.680 Pull them away and make them actually train people how to fight.

01:19:54.400 So basically my radical suggestion here is introduce basic training.

01:19:58.520 Yes.

01:19:59.320 And it doesn't sound like a lot.

01:20:01.580 It worked for the British in India.

01:20:03.740 Well, yes.

01:20:04.380 When they suddenly started giving the Indian people basic military training.

01:20:09.440 Yes.

01:20:09.660 They actually became a reasonably formidable fighting force in the British Empire.

01:20:13.980 And all you would have to do is increase the, you know, the survivability by one or two

01:20:19.960 percent.

01:20:21.200 And it's the equivalent of doubling the size of the military over, over 10 years.

01:20:25.780 Yeah.

01:20:26.260 We only...

01:20:27.180 The loss rate just starts to decline off.

01:20:29.880 Instead of losing millions, you're only losing hundreds of thousands.

01:20:32.960 And even that would be a brilliant success.

01:20:36.340 Yes.

01:20:37.040 In the terms of death tolls.

01:20:38.040 And my second suggestion, and I do think this is within the law, this is a bit more

01:20:42.480 radical, this one.

01:20:46.540 You know that Steve Rogers chap, the Captain America, he gets an injection, he's a bit

01:20:50.700 tough.

01:20:51.680 Well, I mean, this universe does have super soldiers.

01:20:56.580 Yes, they do.

01:20:56.960 You can't make everybody a super...

01:20:58.280 You can't make everyone a space marine because that isn't going to work.

01:21:00.620 And it already doesn't work because when you try that, on some level, some planets,

01:21:05.880 they do just get regular people and try and turn them into space marines.

01:21:08.980 But a lot of people just die because they just can't...

01:21:11.100 It doesn't work.

01:21:11.860 And obviously, when they try it on women, it doesn't work.

01:21:14.520 It never worked.

01:21:15.200 Yes.

01:21:15.780 So...

01:21:16.100 Well, I expect Games Workshop will go woke and just suddenly decide you're going to have

01:21:19.180 female space marines soon.

01:21:20.400 But at the moment, the law says it's impossible.

01:21:22.760 Yeah.

01:21:23.060 In fact, a tiny, tiny percentage of men are tough enough to survive the procedure.

01:21:26.680 Yes.

01:21:27.580 And even then, when they become space marines through genetic modification, the training

01:21:31.940 needed to become a full space marine is so tough, most of those people die in training

01:21:38.820 anyway.

01:21:39.560 Yes.

01:21:40.620 Yes.

01:21:41.000 It's a bit tricky.

01:21:42.220 So they are the most competent fighting force in humanity.

01:21:45.040 However, I read in the law, and it might have been in one of the early books, I think

01:21:49.500 it's one of the three you got there.

01:21:51.420 The very early stages of converting a person into a space marine starts with a couple of

01:21:56.060 injectables.

01:21:56.880 Yeah.

01:21:57.480 And it just makes them bulkier and stronger and bigger.

01:22:00.860 Basically, Captain America.

01:22:01.940 Yes.

01:22:02.720 So they do actually have injectables.

01:22:05.440 They do have the super serum.

01:22:07.160 Yeah.

01:22:08.400 And yet, they're saving it just for the...

01:22:10.000 And it's not just that with space marines.

01:22:11.840 They also implant a whole bunch of organs.

01:22:13.460 It's a big long process.

01:22:14.660 But step one is the super serum.

01:22:18.040 Yeah.

01:22:18.420 So just roll that out.

01:22:19.620 They have the technology.

01:22:21.360 Yes.

01:22:21.500 It's not heresy to create it again, because you don't need to create it again.

01:22:24.880 It already exists.

01:22:25.980 So why not use it?

01:22:27.460 But I'm fairly confident they could churn out a trillion doses of super serum and not

01:22:32.840 do the whole shebang, not do the whole conversion with the extra organs and all the rest of it.

01:22:37.700 But just give them injection number bloody one.

01:22:40.680 Yeah.

01:22:41.840 And you've now got, instead of a trillion, what's going on here then, look, green troops,

01:22:48.440 you've now got a trillion Captain Americas.

01:22:52.100 And even on another level, there must be other forms of performance enhancing drugs.

01:22:56.540 Yes.

01:22:57.340 That do create some level of super soldier.

01:22:59.880 Yes.

01:23:00.180 That are not just lost STC technologies.

01:23:03.220 Yes.

01:23:03.640 These things, like, in the scale of the universe, they must still exist.

01:23:08.340 So basic training and super serum.

01:23:14.160 Now, the basic training alone, I think, would be a game changer.

01:23:17.900 But the super serum would be, I mean, it would just, I mean, you can see why they don't do it.

01:23:23.160 Because humanity would just win.

01:23:25.020 Yes.

01:23:25.940 It would completely remove the need for millions of troops to be slammed into millions of troops.

01:23:31.160 Well, yeah.

01:23:32.060 And then you've got the downstream force multiply effect.

01:23:34.980 So not, if you did give everybody the super serum, you now had a trillion Captain Americas

01:23:39.200 instead of a trillion, you know, not knowing what the hell's going on here.

01:23:43.180 Yeah.

01:23:44.300 Then you wouldn't need to tithe the planets for as many soldiers.

01:23:48.260 No.

01:23:48.560 So more men would stay in their current role, which would boost the economy.

01:23:53.520 Yeah.

01:23:54.240 And then you get a multiply effect, not just in the military, but in the economy as well.

01:23:58.020 And then you might actually start to see positive growth for the first time in 10,000 years.

01:24:01.140 Yeah, because those people would continue getting salaries.

01:24:03.860 Yes.

01:24:04.100 They wouldn't be continuously being replaced.

01:24:07.560 They'd send that money back home, where it would boost the economies of their home planets.

01:24:12.000 More veterans.

01:24:12.680 Yes.

01:24:13.340 Better trained troops.

01:24:15.500 Honestly, do that.

01:24:16.300 And then the humans who aren't getting tithed on those planets can be more productive in

01:24:21.100 the forges of whatever they're making in those hive cities.

01:24:25.160 So a couple of basics.

01:24:26.160 So we've now got to the point where the guard is massively more effective.

01:24:33.720 The ecclesiarchy isn't burning everybody and actually doing some useful stuff.

01:24:38.540 And the mechanicum is innovating again.

01:24:40.940 So, I mean, I think even with just what we talked about so far, we've nailed it.

01:24:44.820 But the Imperial Navy, a 10% reduction in ship losses doubles the fleet over 10 years.

01:24:56.020 Yes.

01:24:56.340 We've had less than those, like eight years or something.

01:25:00.320 So just get better logistics?

01:25:03.940 Yes.

01:25:04.220 It's kind of that simple.

01:25:07.080 Yeah.

01:25:07.260 It's literally a little bit of reorganization.

01:25:11.440 Yes.

01:25:12.560 Well, downscaling the administratum who are responsible for fleet logistics.

01:25:17.180 Yes.

01:25:17.400 So like only like a couple of hundred people from the tens of thousands.

01:25:21.020 And localize them.

01:25:22.120 Yeah.

01:25:22.420 Localize it so that a specific fleet has like a group of five servitors doing the job instead

01:25:28.140 of like a thousand people like sending a bit of paperwork to someone else who sends the

01:25:32.960 bit of paperwork to someone else.

01:25:35.360 We haven't touched on servitors.

01:25:37.560 Oh, yes.

01:25:38.120 Have we got time?

01:25:39.040 Yeah.

01:25:39.400 Well, let's briefly touch on servitors.

01:25:41.940 To briefly explain what a servitor is, they are usually someone who has committed a crime.

01:25:46.980 Yes.

01:25:47.240 And, or has done something silly and they are, for their misdeeds.

01:25:53.960 Yes.

01:25:54.360 They've had their brains essentially lobotomized.

01:25:56.940 Yes.

01:25:57.520 And limbs replaced with really specific bits of technology which let them do singular tasks

01:26:04.440 very well.

01:26:05.680 But they are essentially brain damaged robots from now on.

01:26:09.540 Yes.

01:26:09.980 They're not dead.

01:26:11.160 So this is the only bit where I think the Imperium is actually much better than we are.

01:26:14.980 Well, because we've got all these sort of these urban crime problems.

01:26:21.500 Yeah.

01:26:21.880 And our response is to maybe arrest them and then immediately let them out again.

01:26:27.340 Pat on the back.

01:26:27.980 Yes.

01:26:28.680 Don't do it again.

01:26:29.520 Yeah.

01:26:29.880 And then import some more of them.

01:26:31.120 Yes.

01:26:31.960 Whereas in the Imperium, if you fuck around, you find out immediately by being mind wiped

01:26:38.400 and...

01:26:39.780 Your arm has been turned into a screwdriver that is only designed to screw one type of bolt.

01:26:44.980 Yes.

01:26:45.420 In one specific direction.

01:26:46.800 And that is your existence for the rest of your life.

01:26:49.040 Yes.

01:26:49.500 Or it might be because we've mentioned they don't like AIs and they've only got so many

01:26:54.120 of these machine spirits.

01:26:55.400 So if they want, say, a door, an automatic door, somebody's brain will be, you know,

01:27:02.240 after the criminal, the mind wiped...

01:27:03.960 Yeah.

01:27:04.120 Their brain will be stuck in a jar, attached to the door, and then their one job is to

01:27:09.000 open and close the door.

01:27:09.840 Yeah.

01:27:10.000 They sense when someone's coming close and it opens and closes the door, as opposed to

01:27:14.180 having a light sensor or something in front of the door.

01:27:16.580 Because obviously a light sensor, that's...

01:27:18.020 You don't want...

01:27:18.620 Why would you do a light sensor when you can just lobotomize a criminal?

01:27:22.600 Yes.

01:27:23.140 Yes.

01:27:23.420 Or very based, actually.

01:27:24.560 Anyway, so the Imperium...

01:27:26.120 Modularize ship construction.

01:27:31.740 Standardize and modularize.

01:27:33.860 Yeah.

01:27:34.280 As there are no standards in ship construction.

01:27:36.580 Yes.

01:27:36.960 Because they're just bodging together STCs from 10,000 years ago.

01:27:41.180 Yeah.

01:27:42.000 Actually, just set down a standard for how a destroyer works or how a mothership works.

01:27:47.680 And stop building them like sodding cathedrals.

01:27:50.560 Yes.

01:27:51.360 I mean, that is...

01:27:51.960 I mean, look...

01:27:52.440 They do worry a lot about how they look on the outside.

01:27:55.220 So, anesthetics are very important.

01:27:56.780 It must have a cathedral the size of London on top of the spaceship.

01:28:00.320 And it is a lovely dark gothic sort of theme.

01:28:03.520 Lots of gold.

01:28:04.320 Yes.

01:28:04.500 But it's not that functional.

01:28:05.960 No.

01:28:06.340 It doesn't protect them when the Eldar ships come out of the webway and start attacking them.

01:28:12.560 Yes.

01:28:12.920 But it does give you somewhere to pray if you happen to be on the ship.

01:28:15.480 Yes.

01:28:15.660 So, my solution here is basically do what Henry Ford did.

01:28:21.000 So, get a production line and stop saying, okay, well, this planet you're going to do.

01:28:25.220 We're going to churn out a ship in 300 years.

01:28:26.820 We'll come back and pick it up.

01:28:28.160 From now on, we're going to modularize the layout.

01:28:31.700 We're going to standardize it, modularize it.

01:28:33.920 You're going to produce the drive unit.

01:28:35.460 You're going to produce the living quarters.

01:28:37.780 You're going to produce the weapons unit.

01:28:39.640 Everybody creates these modularized to the same standards.

01:28:44.180 Innovation can be allowed to a degree, but as long as it interconnectability.

01:28:48.660 And then you basically start running a Henry Ford-level production line for ships.

01:28:54.500 Instead of having just a conveyor belt with all the components being neatly fitted in,

01:29:01.840 which is what you're suggesting, the current Imperium is wait 200 years for the batch of bolts

01:29:08.540 to be finished being made, to be shipped halfway across the galaxy in the warp,

01:29:12.840 which is then lost in the warp.

01:29:15.220 Yes.

01:29:15.600 Yes.

01:29:16.180 Yes.

01:29:16.500 So, I mean, or like a Tesla production line.

01:29:19.520 Any of that.

01:29:20.100 Yes.

01:29:20.120 Any production line system, modularized.

01:29:22.820 And, yes, so that was sort of a bit of Henry Ford-ing.

01:29:34.340 Reconstruct the Inquisition.

01:29:37.280 Yeah.

01:29:37.720 So, this one is a bit tricky because, yes, they keep, you know, burning worlds

01:29:44.240 and eliminating anybody who shows the slightest spark of being useful.

01:29:49.840 Because what if they're, what if it's inspired by demons?

01:29:54.400 Yeah.

01:29:54.880 It could be heresy.

01:29:55.800 So, we might as well kill everyone.

01:29:57.180 Yes.

01:29:58.780 These guys, but also, it actually might be heresy.

01:30:03.180 It actually might be warp corruption.

01:30:05.300 Because there is a slight chance it is actually heresy.

01:30:07.840 But it is a real problem, though.

01:30:09.080 Yeah, yeah.

01:30:09.460 So, they're not just being nutter.

01:30:12.480 They are actually concerned for the well-being of the rest of the galaxy.

01:30:15.300 So, it's kind of like, we will sacrifice a world for the sake of everyone else.

01:30:20.460 Yes.

01:30:21.080 And the big problem with these guys is there's basically nobody above them.

01:30:25.280 No.

01:30:25.580 They are literally answerable only to, like, a Custodes or a Primarch.

01:30:31.600 Yes.

01:30:32.000 And even then, in circumstances, if an Inquisitor suspects a Primarch are being heretical.

01:30:38.960 I mean, good luck trying to do anything about it.

01:30:39.880 Yeah, I was going to say.

01:30:40.520 They probably couldn't, but there are some circumstances there.

01:30:43.780 Yes, so they aren't, well, in their own minds, they answer only to the Emperor.

01:30:48.940 Yes.

01:30:49.720 So, again, I'm sticking the Custodes in here.

01:30:53.560 The problem is, is because they have nobody over them,

01:30:59.320 and because their job is to root out heresy,

01:31:03.320 and the only threat to them is other Inquisitors,

01:31:07.320 the cover-your-arse attitude is to be the most zealous you possibly can.

01:31:12.580 Yeah.

01:31:12.820 Because you don't want one of the few people who can judge you,

01:31:15.740 which is other Inquisitors.

01:31:16.980 You go, oh, you're actually, you're being quite heretical in the way you're doing that.

01:31:19.800 You're being a bit soft.

01:31:20.820 Yeah, yeah.

01:31:21.520 That's heresy.

01:31:22.280 So everybody ramps the nuttiness up to, you know, 11.

01:31:27.640 So, again, you've just got to stick in the Custodes here again.

01:31:30.000 And if the Custodes are like, yeah, this guy, he's just out of control, go for him, get him done.

01:31:38.560 And that will flip the incentives to be only as harsh as necessary.

01:31:46.240 No more.

01:31:47.380 Yes.

01:31:48.080 So hopefully that would stop the wastage that comes from Exterminatus,

01:31:54.460 using the Exterminatus stuff on planets that don't need it.

01:31:59.140 Because the Custodes is like, no, you're wrong.

01:32:01.460 Yes.

01:32:02.420 And they won't like it,

01:32:03.320 but their assassins are going to do dick against a Custodian.

01:32:07.680 Yeah, exactly.

01:32:08.300 Best of luck.

01:32:11.500 Streamline the administratum and tithe system.

01:32:14.920 So this is a tricky one

01:32:16.140 because it is such a complete sodding mess,

01:32:20.160 the administratum,

01:32:22.820 that reforms are a bit difficult.

01:32:26.500 The best I could do on this one is basically a feudal model.

01:32:29.860 So in the lore,

01:32:34.240 there's the example of Ultramar.

01:32:36.400 And that's where one of the Primarchs comes from.

01:32:39.140 Yeah.

01:32:39.500 Rebuti Gilliman,

01:32:40.940 Primarch of the Ultramarine.

01:32:44.860 And that is a mini little 500 world version of the Imperium.

01:32:49.280 Yes.

01:32:49.500 But it's just 500 worlds.

01:32:50.600 Because they were cut off during the various events in the past.

01:32:54.220 He essentially attempted to rebuild

01:32:56.340 his own little version of the Imperium of Man.

01:32:59.420 And he was doing quite well.

01:33:00.860 Yeah.

01:33:01.360 The Emperor was just a bit faster.

01:33:02.920 Yeah.

01:33:04.340 But that is a nice little pocket,

01:33:08.960 a decent number of worlds.

01:33:11.560 And administratively, it's functional.

01:33:15.400 Yes.

01:33:15.980 I mean, it's not perfect,

01:33:17.800 but it's orders of magnitude better than the Imperium as a whole.

01:33:21.900 Yeah.

01:33:22.680 Right.

01:33:23.000 So just do that everywhere.

01:33:25.320 Yeah.

01:33:26.120 Decentralize everything from

01:33:27.540 Yes.

01:33:28.400 Like the servitors who run the Administratum on Earth.

01:33:31.760 Give planets, planetary areas, central hubs

01:33:35.340 where even a tiny bit of decentralization will work.

01:33:39.680 Yes.

01:33:40.000 It will just improve everything massively.

01:33:41.420 When people start focusing on the problems that

01:33:44.000 these individual sectors need,

01:33:47.500 need to be fixed.

01:33:47.920 We're going to need to do this a whole bunch of times

01:33:49.520 because even if you said,

01:33:50.820 okay, well, what we're going to do

01:33:51.620 is we're going to start splitting you up into regions.

01:33:55.320 And each region is a thousand worlds.

01:33:57.620 And then above that,

01:33:58.280 you've got the province layer,

01:33:59.740 which is, you know,

01:34:01.120 a hundred regions or maybe even a thousand regions.

01:34:03.960 And eventually you get back to the Imperium.

01:34:06.200 At some level,

01:34:07.560 maybe the province level,

01:34:10.120 you know,

01:34:10.420 you want to treat that as a mini Imperium.

01:34:12.540 So within your 10,000 worlds,

01:34:15.600 you've got to produce your own ships,

01:34:19.220 your own guard units,

01:34:21.040 everything you need.

01:34:22.920 You need to be a sort of functional unit by yourself.

01:34:26.000 And then you get the innovation effects

01:34:28.220 that they're going to be competing against everybody else.

01:34:31.160 Yes.

01:34:31.320 But also at that level,

01:34:32.800 you can just about administer it effectively.

01:34:36.760 Yes.

01:34:37.280 Yeah.

01:34:37.600 Even a reduction down to that level.

01:34:40.140 And the, yeah,

01:34:41.820 competition is what the Imperium currently lacks.

01:34:45.080 Yes.

01:34:45.400 Because there is no competition

01:34:46.540 because everyone is one giant blob.

01:34:48.720 They don't have any form of natural improvement on anything.

01:34:53.500 It's very Soviet.

01:34:54.640 Yeah.

01:34:55.220 Yes.

01:34:56.240 So I like the feudal model.

01:34:58.080 Yes.

01:34:58.620 The tiny problem with that

01:35:00.500 is the reason they don't do that

01:35:03.060 is because they did do that before

01:35:04.960 in the Horus heresy

01:35:06.160 and they said,

01:35:06.840 okay,

01:35:06.940 we're going to have 20,

01:35:07.740 well,

01:35:07.980 18 because two of them.

01:35:09.300 Yeah.

01:35:09.940 Yeah.

01:35:10.300 Something was dodgy.

01:35:11.120 We took a couple of them.

01:35:11.480 Something happened.

01:35:12.300 We don't actually know,

01:35:13.320 but something happened.

01:35:14.640 I've got,

01:35:15.300 I've got a theory.

01:35:16.200 I won't run it.

01:35:16.780 I won't run through it here,

01:35:17.620 but so they had 18,

01:35:20.760 basically mini Imperial armies before

01:35:24.040 and nine of them went a bit schizo.

01:35:28.160 Yes.

01:35:28.480 They followed Horus into the heresy.

01:35:31.720 Yeah.

01:35:32.360 And that's why for the last 10,000 years

01:35:35.480 it's been centralized.

01:35:36.660 Yeah.

01:35:37.500 However,

01:35:39.140 the bureaucracy is just,

01:35:40.680 you are going to lose

01:35:42.180 and the biggest problem is not the Tyranids

01:35:44.860 or the Necrons or the Orcs or the Eldar.

01:35:47.440 The biggest problem is that your own bureaucracy

01:35:49.320 is going to kill you.

01:35:50.620 Yeah.

01:35:50.820 The mismanagement of the Imperium

01:35:53.240 kills more people than any form of Xenos ever have.

01:35:56.460 Yes.

01:35:57.100 Ever.

01:35:57.900 So,

01:35:58.420 and therefore,

01:35:59.740 you know,

01:36:00.320 just suck it up,

01:36:01.180 buttercup.

01:36:01.680 You're going to have to go back to a feudal system,

01:36:04.000 building some safeguards if you like.

01:36:07.080 But if you did it at clusters of a thousand worlds.

01:36:10.500 Yeah.

01:36:11.240 And this isn't necessarily doing it from the Space Marines

01:36:14.240 because the Space Marines have already been decentralized

01:36:16.100 into their own more efficient fighting groups

01:36:20.040 called chapters.

01:36:20.960 Yes.

01:36:21.820 Well,

01:36:22.060 funnily enough,

01:36:22.600 of a thousand.

01:36:23.560 Yeah.

01:36:24.020 So,

01:36:24.340 because there were too many Space Marines

01:36:26.340 in a single legion,

01:36:28.600 which is what made the Horus heresy so impactful

01:36:31.920 and so devastating to the Imperium as a whole

01:36:34.240 because half of the military and galaxy were like,

01:36:37.340 no,

01:36:37.620 we're actually fighting against you now.

01:36:39.480 Cutting them down made everyone more efficient.

01:36:41.700 Individual chapters could focus on

01:36:43.560 their individual problems

01:36:45.180 in their own individual bits of space

01:36:47.100 in much greater efficiency.

01:36:50.660 Yes.

01:36:51.400 So,

01:36:51.700 so my solution is quite simply go back to,

01:36:54.280 you know,

01:36:54.640 feudal France.

01:36:55.800 I mean,

01:36:55.940 it's just,

01:36:56.300 it's just that.

01:36:57.920 Yeah.

01:36:58.160 And then you could even have these,

01:37:01.460 the already decentralized Space Marine chapters

01:37:03.580 integrated into these feudal areas

01:37:07.180 as,

01:37:09.340 well,

01:37:09.540 as dedicated forces.

01:37:10.680 So at the moment,

01:37:11.540 they're not really dedicated

01:37:12.640 unless they're from a single founding world

01:37:15.120 where like the Ultramarines are still

01:37:17.060 based around Ultramar.

01:37:19.720 There's a few other forces.

01:37:21.000 I believe the Black Templars are on Armageddon.

01:37:23.540 They all have their own little worlds,

01:37:25.700 but if they were set to a specific sector of space

01:37:28.440 as part of this new decentralized system,

01:37:30.680 I feel like that could,

01:37:31.420 that could work very well.

01:37:32.440 Yes.

01:37:32.840 Especially bolstering the military forces there.

01:37:36.120 Yes.

01:37:37.020 So,

01:37:38.040 I mean,

01:37:38.380 we've basically done it.

01:37:39.980 We fixed the Imperium

01:37:41.140 using very,

01:37:43.940 very basic economics.

01:37:46.000 Basically reverting to

01:37:48.440 Henry Ford's production line.

01:37:50.980 Yeah.

01:37:51.820 Yeah.

01:37:52.980 Captain America's super serum,

01:37:55.420 basic planning,

01:37:57.120 feudalism,

01:37:58.360 medieval French feudalism,

01:38:00.940 and whatever the other thing was.

01:38:03.960 Oh,

01:38:04.120 yeah.

01:38:04.980 Doing some innovation

01:38:06.180 and then lying about it.

01:38:07.880 Yes.

01:38:08.620 Yes.

01:38:08.920 tricking the populace

01:38:11.520 into thinking nothing's changed,

01:38:13.060 but they're actually changing everything.

01:38:14.260 Yes.

01:38:15.180 The last one's a bit tricky.

01:38:16.840 What are we going to do about the warp?

01:38:19.240 The problem with the warp is,

01:38:21.040 because it now exists,

01:38:22.260 it can't not exist.

01:38:23.720 Yes.

01:38:23.980 And the only way to travel across it

01:38:26.540 is to use these ridiculous Astronomicon

01:38:29.040 and use psykers

01:38:30.580 and to basically roll the dice.

01:38:32.940 You can't not roll the dice in the warp.

01:38:35.260 The only way to do it is to beat it

01:38:37.380 would be to develop some other form

01:38:39.060 of faster than light travel.

01:38:40.960 Yes,

01:38:41.300 but I mean,

01:38:42.340 we've had at least three highly advanced,

01:38:44.120 or four highly advanced species

01:38:45.600 in this law

01:38:46.320 and none of them figured out FTL.

01:38:48.800 No.

01:38:49.160 So we can probably safely assume

01:38:50.660 that it doesn't exist.

01:38:51.700 Yeah,

01:38:51.980 it can't happen

01:38:52.720 because the only reason

01:38:53.580 they can travel so fast

01:38:54.900 across the warp

01:38:55.560 is because it doesn't obey

01:38:57.460 the laws of physics

01:38:58.120 or time or space.

01:38:59.100 So there's not really a lot

01:39:01.420 you could do about this

01:39:02.200 apart from what we've already talked about,

01:39:04.460 which is your feudal system

01:39:07.380 with a more effective military

01:39:10.080 and you actually shouldn't need

01:39:11.720 to travel so much.

01:39:12.780 Yeah,

01:39:12.980 reduce the need to travel through it,

01:39:14.760 reducing the deaths

01:39:15.580 and economic drainage

01:39:19.080 that is the warp.

01:39:21.600 It would also stop

01:39:22.740 more chaos incursions,

01:39:24.520 people becoming corrupted

01:39:25.340 mid-flight.

01:39:26.080 That would also be a big benefit.

01:39:29.100 But if you're sticking

01:39:29.720 to your cluster

01:39:30.240 of your thousand worlds,

01:39:32.220 well,

01:39:32.620 if you're travelling around them,

01:39:34.260 you're going to be spending

01:39:34.900 a lot less time in the warp

01:39:36.460 and therefore

01:39:37.540 you're cutting

01:39:38.620 your dice rolling down

01:39:40.160 significantly

01:39:40.820 from buzzing around

01:39:42.480 all over the bloody place.

01:39:43.460 Yes.

01:39:44.200 Yes.

01:39:44.860 That's the best I can do

01:39:45.900 on that one.

01:39:46.740 It may be if anyone

01:39:47.420 in the audience

01:39:47.940 has got a better solution

01:39:48.760 for how to fix the warp,

01:39:49.900 but basic economics

01:39:51.240 didn't really cover that one.

01:39:52.380 Knowing them,

01:39:53.200 they've probably given us

01:39:54.540 lots of better solutions

01:39:56.020 to everything

01:39:56.480 we've just mentioned.

01:39:58.280 Or at least they are...

01:39:58.980 Actually, that's possible, isn't it?

01:39:59.880 They are screaming

01:40:00.660 at the screen right now

01:40:01.920 for us mispronouncing things.

01:40:03.520 I know you are.

01:40:04.600 Yes.

01:40:04.980 Leave a comment below

01:40:06.060 if you think

01:40:07.700 you have better options.

01:40:08.660 Oh, no.

01:40:09.160 That is content creation 101.

01:40:12.680 Always put a mistake in there.

01:40:15.000 And I do this deliberately

01:40:16.940 every single segment

01:40:19.140 that I do.

01:40:19.760 I include at least

01:40:20.760 one deliberate mistake

01:40:22.360 because you will then get

01:40:24.020 at least 1,000 comments

01:40:25.720 from people pointing out

01:40:26.640 your mistakes.

01:40:27.660 And that then drives

01:40:28.400 the algorithm

01:40:29.040 and then it gets shown

01:40:30.940 to more people

01:40:31.700 and it triggers more.

01:40:33.280 So, for example,

01:40:33.840 every time I see a Ferrari,

01:40:36.300 I mean, that's an easy one.

01:40:37.160 I'll just say that's Lamborghini.

01:40:38.480 Yeah.

01:40:38.940 Like, that's 500 comments

01:40:40.340 straight away.

01:40:41.260 Yeah.

01:40:41.520 And it's also funny

01:40:43.860 to immediately point out

01:40:45.340 a joke.

01:40:45.700 It's also like a joke as well.

01:40:46.820 So, yeah.

01:40:47.140 Sorry, yeah.

01:40:47.700 That's getting off topic.

01:40:48.880 But no, always put mistakes

01:40:50.720 and videos.

01:40:51.280 Honestly, it is the cheat code

01:40:55.400 to succeeding on YouTube

01:40:57.300 because audiences are so autistic

01:41:00.580 they cannot let it go.

01:41:02.060 And they also,

01:41:02.580 they can't read,

01:41:04.320 they can't look at the comments

01:41:05.420 and see that 999 people

01:41:07.580 have already pointed out

01:41:08.820 that no, it's a Ferrari.

01:41:09.980 Because they're already typing

01:41:10.860 in their own answer

01:41:11.540 because the comment box

01:41:12.660 is at the top of YouTube.

01:41:13.540 Yeah.

01:41:13.800 So, never apologize

01:41:15.700 for putting mistakes in.

01:41:16.580 We love those.

01:41:17.080 So, I mean,

01:41:19.120 that kind of gets us

01:41:20.900 to what we can do

01:41:21.920 in one sitting.

01:41:24.940 We're recognizing

01:41:25.860 that Epyram is not failing

01:41:27.240 because of the wars

01:41:29.340 it's fighting.

01:41:30.040 It's failing because of itself

01:41:31.460 and the way

01:41:31.940 that it's going about thing.

01:41:34.300 You know,

01:41:34.960 you can't destroy Mars.

01:41:37.580 No, because Mars,

01:41:39.080 Mars and the Mechanicum on Mars

01:41:40.820 control everything

01:41:42.040 to do with production

01:41:43.400 of anything.

01:41:44.200 Yes.

01:41:44.660 So you're immediately

01:41:45.160 losing it,

01:41:45.720 but you can't leave them alone.

01:41:47.080 No, there are some

01:41:48.940 weird lore implications

01:41:51.480 as to what the machine god

01:41:54.020 and machine spirits

01:41:55.440 actually are.

01:41:56.160 They could be AIs

01:41:56.900 or they could be shards

01:42:00.500 of a long-dead void dragon

01:42:02.820 that's been imprisoned

01:42:03.760 underneath Mars.

01:42:05.080 There are some conspiracies there.

01:42:08.020 You can't destroy

01:42:09.240 the ecclesiarchy

01:42:09.980 because you need it,

01:42:11.000 but at the same time

01:42:11.580 you can't allow it to remain.

01:42:13.000 No.

01:42:13.260 For each of these things,

01:42:15.300 there's a reason

01:42:15.840 why all of these things exist.

01:42:17.080 And you can't tolerate them,

01:42:18.240 but you can't just destroy them.

01:42:19.940 So all I'm suggesting

01:42:20.780 is a series of mild reforms.

01:42:22.900 And I'm not even trying

01:42:24.420 to 180 any of this.

01:42:27.160 All I'm trying to do

01:42:28.080 is extract

01:42:28.720 like 5-10% improvement.

01:42:31.780 Yeah, tiny improvements

01:42:32.780 would improve

01:42:34.320 the lives of everyone.

01:42:35.560 At this scale,

01:42:36.740 a 5-10% improvement

01:42:38.480 would basically

01:42:40.220 just win you the galaxy

01:42:41.220 in a century or less.

01:42:43.780 Especially when fighting

01:42:44.760 some of the Xenos species

01:42:45.800 like the Orcs.

01:42:46.960 Yes.

01:42:47.260 Because they are pretty dumb

01:42:48.800 unless it comes to fighting.

01:42:51.520 Well, so is the Imperium

01:42:52.380 when it comes to...

01:42:53.200 That is true,

01:42:54.040 which is why

01:42:54.740 they need reform

01:42:56.080 in terms of their tactics

01:42:57.460 and leadership as well.

01:42:58.900 So are you satisfied

01:43:01.480 at knowing the laws you do

01:43:04.580 that the Imperium of Dan

01:43:06.740 would conquer the universe

01:43:08.860 or the galaxy at least?

01:43:10.820 Yes.

01:43:11.460 In short order.

01:43:12.300 Unless Games Workshop

01:43:13.460 invented some new bullshit

01:43:14.980 Xenos race

01:43:16.400 that immediately countered you.

01:43:18.180 And this is why

01:43:19.160 I don't think

01:43:19.520 I'm going to be invited

01:43:20.320 to write a book

01:43:21.360 for Black Library.

01:43:22.760 Because

01:43:23.120 if they let me write a book

01:43:25.160 I would just put it in law.

01:43:26.380 Right.

01:43:26.720 They did this

01:43:27.460 and then they did this

01:43:28.460 and then they did this

01:43:29.480 and then

01:43:30.020 they got a cumulative

01:43:31.820 7.5% improvement

01:43:33.840 in all of these aspects

01:43:35.560 every year

01:43:36.340 and basically

01:43:37.380 by the end of the century

01:43:38.660 they'd won everything.

01:43:40.460 And then they wouldn't

01:43:40.920 be so plastic anymore.

01:43:42.040 I think after you

01:43:42.840 would submit that draft

01:43:44.140 we'd see a headline

01:43:45.100 a week later

01:43:45.820 Dan found dead

01:43:48.180 in vat of hobby plastic.

01:43:50.540 Yes.

01:43:50.860 mysteriously placed there

01:43:52.520 no security cameras

01:43:53.680 were active at the time.

01:43:55.680 I mean I would be

01:43:56.500 messing with

01:43:57.660 a £144 share price company

01:44:00.200 if I tried to do that.

01:44:02.440 But at least

01:44:03.500 I've had the satisfaction

01:44:04.760 of brokenomicking

01:44:05.580 the Imperium.

01:44:08.220 I'll tell you what

01:44:08.820 if people

01:44:09.440 have better suggestions

01:44:11.540 it might be worth

01:44:12.420 going over those.

01:44:14.360 Well yeah

01:44:14.800 I mean

01:44:15.100 we're seeing this

01:44:17.480 resonates with people

01:44:18.320 I don't know

01:44:19.120 if there is any overlap

01:44:19.960 between people

01:44:20.680 who watch Lotus Eaters

01:44:21.520 and people who

01:44:22.180 spend more money

01:44:23.340 than they should

01:44:23.700 on plastic.

01:44:24.620 You know what

01:44:25.180 I don't think

01:44:25.780 anyone in the audience

01:44:26.980 actually enjoys

01:44:28.020 Warhammer.

01:44:29.580 I think that

01:44:30.660 no

01:44:31.340 I think

01:44:31.860 no

01:44:32.560 none of you

01:44:33.420 are Warhammer fans.

01:44:34.500 Right.

01:44:35.720 Prove us wrong.

01:44:36.760 Yeah prove us wrong.

01:44:37.540 Prove us wrong.

01:44:39.120 Right

01:44:39.500 finally

01:44:40.460 so

01:44:41.020 we've got

01:44:42.360 a couple of minutes

01:44:43.520 at best left.

01:44:45.040 if for some

01:44:47.400 incredibly bizarre

01:44:48.760 reason

01:44:49.320 anybody who is

01:44:51.160 not already

01:44:51.780 into Warhammer

01:44:52.700 has managed

01:44:53.940 to stick it out

01:44:54.580 this long

01:44:55.040 God knows how

01:44:55.920 how do you

01:44:58.380 get into this

01:44:59.120 stuff?

01:45:00.680 Because there's

01:45:00.940 two

01:45:01.120 actually there's

01:45:01.720 two sides

01:45:02.300 isn't there?

01:45:03.060 There's the plastic

01:45:03.760 thing which I

01:45:04.320 myself don't know

01:45:05.180 anything about

01:45:05.620 apart from I've

01:45:06.240 just bought

01:45:06.780 literally just

01:45:07.420 bought this today.

01:45:08.020 you've just

01:45:08.680 bought

01:45:09.160 you've been

01:45:09.980 dealt your

01:45:10.520 first dealing

01:45:11.380 of the drug

01:45:12.280 yes

01:45:12.820 plastic crack

01:45:14.520 or whatever

01:45:14.860 it is

01:45:15.100 you don't know

01:45:16.200 if you're

01:45:16.460 going to become

01:45:16.740 addicted yet

01:45:17.380 yes

01:45:17.940 I'm always

01:45:20.380 a big fan

01:45:21.100 of Vice

01:45:21.420 so I will

01:45:23.280 embrace this

01:45:23.900 one as

01:45:24.140 enthusiastically

01:45:24.660 as I have

01:45:25.160 all the others

01:45:25.620 it's honestly

01:45:26.400 go into one

01:45:27.820 of the shops

01:45:28.320 the Warhammer

01:45:28.820 shops

01:45:29.100 they are

01:45:29.360 conveniently

01:45:29.720 in every

01:45:30.240 town

01:45:30.580 because it's

01:45:31.260 like the only

01:45:31.680 succeeding

01:45:32.120 business on

01:45:32.640 the high

01:45:32.840 street

01:45:33.080 have one

01:45:35.300 of their

01:45:35.800 incredibly

01:45:37.480 friendly

01:45:38.080 but very

01:45:39.540 unathletic

01:45:40.660 people

01:45:41.000 who run

01:45:41.680 the shops

01:45:42.080 teach you

01:45:44.780 about what

01:45:45.420 the game

01:45:45.700 is

01:45:45.880 because they

01:45:46.280 honestly

01:45:46.920 they love

01:45:47.600 what they

01:45:47.940 do

01:45:48.240 in those

01:45:48.800 shops

01:45:49.080 but it

01:45:49.660 is

01:45:50.080 nerds

01:45:50.920 not jocks

01:45:51.400 yes

01:45:52.640 although a lot

01:45:54.040 of jocks

01:45:54.340 do play it

01:45:54.860 Henry Cavill

01:45:55.540 he is a

01:45:56.160 big fan

01:45:56.800 of Warhammer

01:45:57.200 he is making

01:45:58.480 an Amazon

01:45:58.960 Prime TV

01:45:59.660 series

01:46:00.180 what faction

01:46:00.840 does he

01:46:01.120 play

01:46:01.340 he plays

01:46:02.140 custodian

01:46:03.020 yay

01:46:03.520 man after

01:46:04.060 my own

01:46:04.360 heart

01:46:04.520 yes

01:46:04.800 so but

01:46:05.400 a lot of

01:46:06.340 jocks do

01:46:06.680 play it

01:46:07.180 I know

01:46:07.720 Robbie Williams

01:46:09.020 I think

01:46:09.440 no not

01:46:10.180 Robbie

01:46:10.520 Robin Williams

01:46:11.420 the comedian

01:46:12.060 or the singer

01:46:12.660 the comedian

01:46:13.420 the comedian

01:46:14.040 I believe he

01:46:15.320 was interested

01:46:16.120 in them at

01:46:16.440 some point

01:46:16.740 I saw some

01:46:17.180 story about

01:46:17.820 that

01:46:17.920 go into the

01:46:19.540 shop

01:46:19.740 ask them

01:46:20.420 about Warhammer

01:46:21.220 they will

01:46:22.740 tell you

01:46:23.820 yes

01:46:26.180 I mean I

01:46:29.280 went in there

01:46:29.720 today to pick

01:46:30.380 up this

01:46:31.120 because I

01:46:31.460 thought I'm

01:46:32.000 going to

01:46:32.220 have to

01:46:32.540 see the

01:46:33.740 actual thing

01:46:34.400 if I'm

01:46:34.640 going to

01:46:34.800 talk about

01:46:35.240 it

01:46:35.440 and they

01:46:37.100 are pushers

01:46:38.900 because the

01:46:40.220 moment he

01:46:41.060 said to me

01:46:41.480 are you

01:46:41.780 starting a

01:46:42.700 new army

01:46:43.160 or are you

01:46:43.580 new to

01:46:44.080 this

01:46:44.320 and I

01:46:44.860 said oh

01:46:45.640 yeah

01:46:45.760 no I've

01:46:46.580 never done

01:46:46.900 it before

01:46:47.140 I'm new

01:46:47.600 to this

01:46:47.980 I mean

01:46:48.700 from that

01:46:49.160 moment on

01:46:49.940 he was

01:46:50.440 like

01:46:50.840 got ya

01:46:53.280 these are

01:46:55.880 all the

01:46:56.140 things I

01:46:56.500 can

01:46:56.640 let me

01:46:57.360 show you

01:46:57.740 the paints

01:46:58.420 yes

01:46:58.840 let me

01:46:59.200 show you

01:46:59.480 this

01:46:59.660 45 pound

01:47:00.900 wire clipper

01:47:01.820 trying to

01:47:03.980 push me

01:47:04.280 on all

01:47:04.500 that

01:47:04.600 yes

01:47:04.820 so the

01:47:06.280 tabletop

01:47:06.900 and I'll

01:47:07.640 answer the

01:47:08.040 law

01:47:08.220 if you want

01:47:08.680 to get

01:47:08.840 into the

01:47:09.080 because actually

01:47:09.480 I spent

01:47:09.780 the last

01:47:10.080 two years

01:47:10.580 just doing

01:47:10.880 it and

01:47:11.160 it is

01:47:11.520 honestly

01:47:12.120 it is

01:47:12.440 the best

01:47:13.080 sci-fi

01:47:13.840 law out

01:47:14.540 there

01:47:14.840 by some

01:47:15.940 margin

01:47:16.360 I mean

01:47:16.560 it knocks

01:47:17.460 the shit

01:47:18.000 out of

01:47:18.440 every other

01:47:19.180 sci-fi

01:47:19.680 universe

01:47:20.040 and there's

01:47:21.040 more of

01:47:21.560 it and

01:47:22.340 it's just

01:47:22.640 better

01:47:23.260 it's more

01:47:23.660 realistic

01:47:24.020 it just

01:47:24.840 feels

01:47:25.080 more real

01:47:25.480 so my

01:47:26.420 two

01:47:26.900 recommendations

01:47:27.460 are do

01:47:28.120 that one

01:47:28.820 Horus

01:47:29.560 Rising

01:47:30.020 and also

01:47:31.800 false gods

01:47:33.840 and galaxy

01:47:34.480 they're the

01:47:35.420 first three

01:47:35.820 of the

01:47:36.040 series

01:47:36.280 if you

01:47:37.640 just start

01:47:38.060 with

01:47:38.200 Horus

01:47:38.460 Rising

01:47:38.760 and like

01:47:41.440 I said

01:47:41.600 that book

01:47:42.260 will put

01:47:42.940 follicle

01:47:44.980 growth

01:47:45.280 on your

01:47:45.520 testicles

01:47:45.880 even if

01:47:46.600 it is

01:47:46.940 that manly

01:47:47.940 that book

01:47:48.600 if I

01:47:49.180 didn't have

01:47:49.700 to

01:47:50.120 run a

01:47:51.940 seminar

01:47:52.200 thing

01:47:52.580 later today

01:47:53.360 after this

01:47:53.780 recording

01:47:54.140 I would

01:47:54.760 be at

01:47:55.020 the gym

01:47:55.340 after reading

01:47:56.080 a couple

01:47:56.380 of words

01:47:56.680 of this

01:47:56.900 book

01:47:57.080 yes

01:47:57.480 it's

01:47:58.220 very potent

01:47:58.700 it's

01:47:59.560 basically

01:47:59.820 performance

01:48:00.320 enhancing

01:48:00.760 book

01:48:01.540 and the

01:48:03.140 other one

01:48:03.600 the other

01:48:04.760 really good

01:48:05.660 starting point

01:48:06.340 is a book

01:48:06.980 called

01:48:07.240 Valdor

01:48:07.700 oh yes

01:48:08.620 yes

01:48:08.900 and that

01:48:09.600 is set

01:48:09.980 right at

01:48:10.620 the very

01:48:11.080 beginning

01:48:11.480 of all

01:48:11.880 of this

01:48:12.240 when the

01:48:13.200 world

01:48:13.420 is shit

01:48:14.100 and the

01:48:15.760 emperor

01:48:16.040 is like

01:48:16.400 right let's

01:48:16.840 sort this

01:48:17.220 out then

01:48:17.600 so that

01:48:18.880 goes back

01:48:19.280 right to

01:48:19.780 the very

01:48:20.080 very beginning

01:48:20.640 so either

01:48:21.440 Valdor

01:48:21.960 in fact

01:48:22.300 if my

01:48:23.060 recommendation

01:48:23.480 would be

01:48:23.740 read

01:48:24.040 Horus

01:48:25.120 Rising

01:48:25.740 and that

01:48:27.300 will tell

01:48:27.660 you whether

01:48:27.960 you like

01:48:28.300 the lore

01:48:28.680 or not

01:48:29.080 if you

01:48:29.580 do

01:48:29.840 then go

01:48:30.340 and read

01:48:30.660 Valdor

01:48:31.220 and then

01:48:31.660 carry on

01:48:32.020 with the rest

01:48:32.340 of that

01:48:32.580 because there's

01:48:33.000 53 of them

01:48:33.800 yeah there are

01:48:34.500 there's 53

01:48:35.180 Horus Heresy

01:48:36.820 books

01:48:37.140 then there's

01:48:37.640 like 9 or

01:48:38.220 10

01:48:38.540 Siege of Terror

01:48:40.200 books

01:48:40.540 and they're

01:48:40.940 just starting

01:48:41.560 a new

01:48:42.080 series

01:48:42.780 which is

01:48:43.400 post

01:48:43.860 Siege of Terror

01:48:44.620 oh yes

01:48:45.080 what's that

01:48:45.400 called

01:48:45.580 the

01:48:45.860 Shattering

01:48:47.060 or something

01:48:47.360 like that

01:48:47.560 yes

01:48:47.860 something like

01:48:48.440 that

01:48:48.680 Scouring

01:48:49.240 Scouring

01:48:49.760 yes

01:48:50.140 we were about

01:48:51.020 to be

01:48:51.280 crucified

01:48:51.700 by

01:48:52.640 you in the

01:48:53.660 comments

01:48:53.940 yes

01:48:54.380 I know

01:48:55.180 I know

01:48:55.720 you're looking

01:48:56.300 burnt

01:48:56.660 you're currently

01:48:57.600 attacking the

01:48:58.980 monitor you're

01:48:59.640 watching this on

01:49:00.180 right now

01:49:00.540 on your phone

01:49:01.000 yeah

01:49:01.900 yes

01:49:02.480 right

01:49:02.760 very good

01:49:03.340 so yeah

01:49:04.560 don't know if

01:49:05.640 anybody watched

01:49:06.120 this

01:49:06.380 but if you want

01:49:08.080 more Warhammer

01:49:08.840 content on

01:49:09.840 Brokonomics

01:49:10.500 well I guess

01:49:11.800 we can probably

01:49:12.540 come up with

01:49:12.960 some more

01:49:13.760 stuff

01:49:14.040 I mean

01:49:14.280 we did in the

01:49:16.000 space of less than

01:49:16.700 two hours

01:49:17.040 fix the entire

01:49:17.860 Imperium of Man

01:49:18.580 which has been a

01:49:19.380 10,000 year project

01:49:20.460 but

01:49:20.980 you get what you

01:49:22.360 pay for

01:49:22.820 Brokonomics

01:49:23.340 it's only £5 a

01:49:24.180 month and look

01:49:24.700 we fixed the

01:49:25.500 Imperium

01:49:25.900 and you got to

01:49:26.880 see my face

01:49:27.500 for the first time

01:49:28.040 yes

01:49:28.120 yes people know

01:49:29.360 who you are now

01:49:29.800 and you also might

01:49:30.760 see it a little bit

01:49:31.460 more from now on as

01:49:32.200 well because I think

01:49:32.720 there's a

01:49:33.080 what else are you

01:49:33.560 doing

01:49:33.760 very soon

01:49:34.880 me and Harry

01:49:35.900 will be starting

01:49:36.380 a series

01:49:36.760 we're pretty sure

01:49:37.880 we're calling

01:49:38.320 Journey to the

01:49:38.980 East

01:49:39.300 where we are

01:49:40.340 going to

01:49:40.720 attempt

01:49:41.020 you're going

01:49:41.720 around all the

01:49:42.060 massage parlours

01:49:42.840 in Swindon

01:49:43.260 aren't you

01:49:43.620 well we might

01:49:44.800 have to

01:49:45.120 might have to

01:49:46.020 to be honest

01:49:46.520 what are you

01:49:47.400 actually doing

01:49:47.900 or can you

01:49:48.600 not talk about

01:49:50.980 we haven't

01:49:52.280 actually properly

01:49:53.020 started yet

01:49:53.620 because everyone's

01:49:54.300 been so busy

01:49:54.900 behind the scenes

01:49:55.400 but Journey to the

01:49:56.460 East we want to

01:49:57.100 demystify Japan

01:49:59.080 right

01:49:59.640 in the eyes of

01:50:00.400 by going there

01:50:00.900 well that I'm

01:50:02.080 going on holiday

01:50:02.540 there very soon

01:50:03.200 but that is

01:50:05.000 not definitely

01:50:06.000 not the main

01:50:06.460 objective

01:50:06.780 okay

01:50:07.280 to crowdfund a

01:50:07.980 trip there

01:50:08.280 which we might

01:50:08.880 we will talk

01:50:09.900 about that later

01:50:10.440 well I'll make

01:50:12.240 a companion piece

01:50:13.940 to go with it

01:50:14.540 demystifying

01:50:15.460 Bangkok or something

01:50:16.960 yeah we want to

01:50:17.620 demystify Japan

01:50:18.400 in the eyes of

01:50:18.900 conservatives who

01:50:19.640 only see

01:50:20.560 pixelated

01:50:21.800 tentacle hentai

01:50:22.720 and weird fish

01:50:25.420 that kills you

01:50:26.000 if you eat it

01:50:26.580 yes

01:50:27.300 and they see it

01:50:28.460 and go that's weird

01:50:29.160 don't like that

01:50:29.780 I don't like any

01:50:30.260 of that

01:50:30.580 Carl is

01:50:31.300 he has said

01:50:33.320 some similar

01:50:33.940 things like this

01:50:34.460 in the past

01:50:34.720 he doesn't like it

01:50:35.540 but he respects it

01:50:36.700 in a certain way

01:50:37.340 and we want to

01:50:38.160 take what people

01:50:39.860 don't understand

01:50:40.560 and make them

01:50:41.120 understand it

01:50:41.640 but it will involve

01:50:42.300 bring me back

01:50:43.040 something from

01:50:43.420 the panty vending

01:50:43.980 machine while

01:50:44.440 you're out there

01:50:45.020 well thank you

01:50:47.500 for your debut

01:50:49.400 appearance

01:50:50.020 Samson

01:50:50.680 very good

01:50:51.540 I hope you

01:50:52.200 enjoyed it

01:50:52.560 if you want

01:50:53.180 more Warhammer

01:50:53.900 then say so

01:50:55.940 let us know

01:50:56.460 yes

01:50:56.680 and if we got

01:50:57.560 anything wrong

01:50:58.200 you know

01:50:59.180 point that out

01:50:59.600 as well

01:50:59.900 which you will

01:51:00.480 anyway

01:51:00.820 cheerio

01:51:01.920 goodbye

01:51:02.740 bye

The Podcast of the Lotus Eaters - October 28, 2025

FREEMIUM： Brokenomics ｜ The Economics of Warhammer 40k

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