The Podcast of the Lotus Eaters - May 17, 2026


PREVIEW: Epochs #263 | The Life of Henry VIII - Part 1


Episode Stats


Length

16 minutes

Words per minute

162.23897

Word count

2,683

Sentence count

60

Harmful content

Misogyny

1

sentences flagged

Toxicity

3

sentences flagged

Hate speech

13

sentences flagged


Summary

Summaries generated with gmurro/bart-large-finetuned-filtered-spotify-podcast-summ .

Henry VIII was one of the most famous kings there ever was, and there's so much to be said about him. He was a man of many talents, but his greatest strength was his ruthlessness, and he was also a man with a dark sense of humor.

Transcript

Transcript generated with Whisper (turbo).
Misogyny classifications generated with MilaNLProc/bert-base-uncased-ear-misogyny .
Toxicity classifications generated with s-nlp/roberta_toxicity_classifier .
Hate speech classifications generated with facebook/roberta-hate-speech-dynabench-r4-target .
00:00:00.000 Hello and welcome back to Epochs where I shall be continuing once again my story of the English
00:00:27.760 monarchy the English monarchy to begin with before we get into Britain many centuries from now we're
00:00:32.560 only up to Henry VIII aren't we if you remember last time we did all of Henry VII Henry Tudor
00:00:38.080 the original the OG Tudor and he had his eldest son Arthur who's going to be king next but then
00:00:45.180 he dies of natural causes before he became king so it passes to the next boy down the second son
00:00:51.780 who's another Henry Henry VII Henry Tudor's eldest surviving son Henry VIII now of course
00:00:58.960 this is a big one I imagine it'll be more than one episode and in fact there's so much to be said
00:01:04.460 that already in epochs we've touched around it you might recall if you've watched them all
00:01:11.860 that with Luca I've had conversations about Thomas More who plays a big part in the story
00:01:17.180 and Thomas Cromwell who also plays I think that was more than one part that one
00:01:21.180 who plays a big part in all of this. So Henry VIII, one of the most famous kings there's ever
00:01:27.840 been and so much to be said. I mean I might even do episodes of other people that are really
00:01:33.220 important in his reign but to begin with let's just start the story with Henry VIII. As always
00:01:38.340 I shall be reading from Professor Sir Charles Oman, a late 19th century early 20th century
00:01:43.480 professor of history at Oxford University as well as Sir Winston Churchill in his history of the
00:01:49.000 English-speaking peoples. So let's kick off with a little bit of Oman, whose chapter is called
00:01:54.620 Henry VIII and the Breach with Rome. Perhaps that's the biggest story of Henry VIII's reign,
00:02:01.380 even bigger than that he had six wives and two of them executed. Perhaps even bigger than that is
00:02:07.020 that it's the Protestant Reformation, the age of Luther, right? And England becoming not Catholic.
00:02:15.560 So that's one of the biggest overarching themes of the reign of Henry VIII
00:02:20.220 Henry himself, if you didn't already know, is a true monarch
00:02:25.840 He wielded power with aplomb, like he was born to it
00:02:29.960 Some people in France called him the English Nero, i.e. more or less a tyrant
00:02:35.040 He was nowhere near as bloodthirsty and evil and sadistic as Nero
00:02:38.980 But he was still reasonably bloodthirsty and sadistic
00:02:42.420 Okay, let's start at the beginning
00:02:44.300 Sir Charles Oman wrote this quote the young king who succeeded to the cautious and politic Henry
00:02:50.540 VII was perhaps the most remarkable man who ever sat on the English throne he guided England
00:02:57.540 through the epoch of change and unrest which lay between the Middle Ages and the modern history
00:03:03.000 and his guidance was of such a peculiar and personal stamp that he left an indelible mark
00:03:09.380 On the land for many succeeding generations
00:03:11.640 All Europe was transformed
00:03:13.860 During his time 0.51
00:03:14.880 And that the transformation in England
00:03:17.380 Differed from that on the continent
00:03:19.060 In almost every respect
00:03:20.440 Was due to his own strange combination of qualities
00:03:23.600 That's another thing I'd like to mention
00:03:25.620 Right near the beginning, straight off the bat
00:03:27.500 Is that he was mercurial
00:03:29.480 Henry VIII
00:03:30.600 You never knew where you stood with him
00:03:33.480 And that's how he liked it, it was deliberate
00:03:35.080 He would change his mind without telling anyone
00:03:37.840 and then you were suddenly on shaky ground without realizing it and then he could be angry with you
00:03:43.300 or even punish you right so i mean mercurial is is a nice way of putting it dangerous a dangerous
00:03:50.240 person i've said before a number of times on epochs haven't i um there's certain people
00:03:54.260 throughout history i personally would be terrified just to be in the same room with them somebody
00:04:00.440 like nero somebody like caligula somebody like domitian perhaps starlin you do or say the wrong
00:04:06.100 thing look the wrong way perhaps don't do anything at all you're just simply in their line of sight
00:04:13.080 simple as that and that you're in terrible trouble now you might get tortured to death
00:04:17.140 you quite literally have done nothing wrong Henry VIII is I think particularly the older Henry VIII
00:04:23.440 he got worse and worse as he got older is something close that not quite that not quite as terrifying
00:04:28.760 as being in the same room with Caligula or Stalin but close quite close he could just he could just
00:04:35.420 make up something he could just decide in his own head that you've slighted him or embarrassed him
00:04:40.920 in some way and you you've basically done nothing so again a dangerous man continue saying this
00:04:47.640 henry's character was a very complex one mingling qualities good and bad in strange confusion
00:04:53.480 in many things he showed the traits of his grandfather edward the fourth his selfishness
00:04:59.580 his love of display, his sensuality, his outbursts of ruthless cruelty. But Edward had been nothing
00:05:07.700 more than a soldier and a man of pleasure. He had no love of work, no power to read the character
00:05:13.540 of others. Henry VIII was a student, a statesman, a deep plotter, a keen observer of other men.
00:05:21.180 He chose his servants, or rather his tools, with a clear-headed sagacity which no king ever
00:05:27.380 surpassed and he could break them or fling them away when they became useless with a coolness
00:05:33.740 that was all his own love of power love of work love of pleasure love of show and pomp did not
00:05:40.760 distract him one from the other but blended closely together into one complex impulse
00:05:46.980 the determination to have his own will in all things end quote so that's another key thing
00:05:53.860 To Henry VIII's character 0.98
00:05:56.180 Again, somebody like Stalin 0.96
00:05:58.240 What they want is what they get
00:06:00.980 And anything short of that is not acceptable
00:06:04.660 Absolutely everything in the world around them
00:06:08.200 Has to be bent to their will
00:06:10.700 And their will alone and exactly
00:06:13.140 And if they don't get their way
00:06:15.520 Heads will roll
00:06:16.720 It's like being an alpha
00:06:18.060 Some sort of ultra, ultra alpha
00:06:19.700 But worse than that
00:06:21.300 Because it's not just like an ego
00:06:23.420 It's not just a bit of narcissism
00:06:25.700 It's life or death
00:06:27.400 You might think a true alpha might be magnanimous sometimes
00:06:31.160 Like Julius Caesar or Richard the Lionheart or something
00:06:35.840 Part of their alphaness is that they forgive people
00:06:39.560 But no, if Henry VIII doesn't get exactly what he wants 0.90
00:06:44.100 You know, like a psychopathic child
00:06:46.280 Then they'll throw a tantrum
00:06:48.160 And one goes on
00:06:49.260 Such a state of mind bespeaks the tyrant
00:06:53.220 and a tyrant henry became but a tyrant whose brain was as strong as his will who knew the
00:07:00.780 possible from the impossible who could discern how far it was safe to go and could check himself
00:07:05.960 on the edge of any dangerous precipice of foreign or internal politics he kept as it were a finger
00:07:12.780 on the nation's pulse and could restrain himself for a space if ever it began to beat too excitedly
00:07:20.120 the pulse of the nation. He did his best to call popularity with the English by an affable bearing
00:07:26.800 and a regard for their prejudices. He strove to make them look on him as the nation's representative
00:07:33.020 and to flatter them into believing that his resolves were really in accordance with their
00:07:38.700 own will and interests. He represented to them not only law and order but national feeling and
00:07:44.800 national pride. It was this clever acting that made it possible for him to manipulate England
00:07:50.280 according to his wishes. He appeared to take the people into his confidence and they replied by
00:07:56.260 believing his statements even when they were most unfounded and misleading. Thus it was that Henry
00:08:03.040 was able to rule despotically for 40 years without having a serious quarrel with his parliament
00:08:08.600 and without being compelled to raise a standing army, the tool which all contemporary despots
00:08:14.460 were forced to employ. Henry VIII was very young when he came to the throne. He had not quite
00:08:19.940 reached the age of 18. His character was still undeveloped, though he was known to be both
00:08:25.700 clever and active. All that the nation knew of him was that he was a bright, handsome youth,
00:08:31.920 fond of horse and hound, and equally fond of his books and of his loot. He had from the first and
00:08:38.380 ire for popularity and did all that he could to please the people by shows of pageants that forced
00:08:45.080 him to dip deeply into his father's hoarded money. If you remember, Henry VII had been very prudent
00:08:52.200 financially speaking. Remember, he finished his reign with more money than any other king of
00:08:59.020 England ever had up to that point. So Henry VIII goes about spending it quite lavishly. Omar again.
00:09:06.900 Yet the first act of Henry's reign was ominous of future cruelty and ruthlessness.
00:09:12.980 Knowing the unpopularity of his father's harsh and extortionate but faithful servants,
00:09:18.520 Empsom and Dudley, he cast them into prison and had them attainted by Parliament
00:09:23.680 on a preposterous charge of treason. They were well hated and the people saw their heads fall
00:09:29.760 with joy, not reflecting on the character of a king who had deliberately slain his father's
00:09:35.800 councillors merely to win popular applause. Henry retained most of his father's old ministers in
00:09:41.740 office but he instantly reversed his father's policy of non-intervention in the wars of the
00:09:48.020 continent. He had not long been seated on the throne when he joined the Holy League, a confederacy
00:09:54.360 formed against France by Pope Julius II in which both those old intriguers, the Emperor Maximilian
00:10:01.600 and King Ferdinand of Aragon were already enlisted. This is in the year 1511 we're talking
00:10:07.540 about here. Henry might have left them to fight their own battles for the mastery of Italy and
00:10:13.020 Flanders, but he was burning to assert his power in Europe and to win military distinction. His
00:10:19.400 arms were fairly fortunate. A first attack on the south of France failed, but he met with
00:10:25.300 considerable success in 1513 when he landed at Calais with 25,000 men, took the towns of Tournai
00:10:33.200 and Touraine and routed the French army of the north at the engagement called the Battle of the
00:10:39.740 Spurs, named because of the haste with which the French knights urged their horses out of the fray.
00:10:46.360 Finding his army's losing ground both in Italy and Flanders, King Louis XII sought peace from
00:10:52.520 Henry and obtained it at the cheap price of paying a hundred thousand crowns and marrying the young
00:10:59.180 princess Mary the the young English monarch's favorite sister and that was in 1514. These easy
00:11:05.540 terms were granted because Henry found that his two wily allies Ferdinand and Maximilian had no
00:11:11.700 intention of helping him and were bent purely on their own aggrandizement. The alliance with Louis
00:11:17.340 Was not to have much duration
00:11:19.360 For within a year he was dead
00:11:21.460 Killed as the chroniclers assert
00:11:23.700 By the late hours 1.00
00:11:25.620 And high living which his gay young 1.00
00:11:27.700 English queen persuaded him to adopt 0.87
00:11:29.780 His widow soon 1.00
00:11:31.700 Dried her tears and married
00:11:33.440 Sir Charles Brandon
00:11:34.680 One of her brother's favourite companions
00:11:36.960 Whom Henry to grace the match 1.00
00:11:39.560 Decorated with the ill-omened
00:11:41.800 Title of the Duke of Suffolk
00:11:43.700 So just say this
00:11:45.020 Charles Brandon the Duke of Suffolk
00:11:47.340 plays a big part over the coming reign.
00:11:49.960 He's one of the main players, really.
00:11:52.380 And he's supposed to have been one of Henry's closest friends.
00:11:57.220 When you're right at the top of power,
00:11:59.100 it's very, very difficult to have proper, proper friends,
00:12:03.220 particularly the more extreme your power is,
00:12:06.340 because you can never truly, truly trust them.
00:12:10.000 They're not just in it to get power themselves by proxy
00:12:13.560 or just to get money or ultimately to betray you.
00:12:17.340 Nonetheless, Charles Brandon, the now Duke of Suffolk, seems to have been one of those for Henry, or was really, at least up until towards the very end.
00:12:27.780 So remember, Brandon, Suffolk, you should be playing a role in all of this.
00:12:33.200 So he decorated him with the ill-omened title of the Duke of Suffolk, the spoil of the unhappy Delapoles. 0.98
00:12:40.140 That's another thing to mention. 0.98
00:12:41.360 You know, after Henry VII comes to power 1.00
00:12:44.300 And one way or another does away with all the remaining Yorkists
00:12:47.520 George, Duke of Clarence, his son
00:12:50.200 Was done away with
00:12:51.580 Well, the next best claimant to the throne
00:12:54.660 Through a tenuous Plantagenet line 1.00
00:12:57.140 Will be the Della Poles 1.00
00:12:58.400 Well, that's still the case, isn't it? 0.98
00:13:00.080 In the age of Henry VIII
00:13:01.900 So he's taken the title of Suffolk from those
00:13:06.240 And given it to his friend and now brother-in-law
00:13:08.700 Oman continues
00:13:09.820 from this union sprang one who was to sit for a brief moment on the English throne and we talk
00:13:16.640 about Lady Jane Grey there but we'll save that that's a much much later episode we'll talk all
00:13:21.580 about what happens uh that that's a generation events okay Oman continues saying ere the French
00:13:28.740 treaty had been made a short stirring episode of war had taken place in England's northern frontier
00:13:34.440 King James IV of Scotland had certain border feuds to settle with the English
00:13:40.440 and thought he might best take his revenge whilst Henry and his army were overseas in Flanders
00:13:46.360 so he suddenly declared war and crossed the Tweed into Northumberland
00:13:51.020 Thomas Howard, Earl of Surrey, son of John of Norfolk who fell at Bosworth
00:13:57.040 was in charge of the border at the time
00:13:59.700 this family the howard family will also be one of the key players in all of this you might know
00:14:06.660 katherine howard his fifth wife years and years and years from what we're talking about here but
00:14:11.200 but he's heavily involved with things more than that even involved with like the bolly and boleyn
00:14:17.160 and mary boleyn and um so he's absolutely a key player thomas howard he raised the levies of the
00:14:23.500 northern counties and marched to meet the scots by throwing himself between king james and his
00:14:29.080 retreat on scotland he forced the enemy to fight on flodden field between the till and the tweed
00:14:35.380 the armies met and fought a fierce and doubtful battle which lasted far into the night though
00:14:41.060 victorious on one wing the scots were beaten in the center and their king and most of his nobles
00:14:47.300 fell in a desperate struggle around the royal banner so flodden field super important battle
00:14:53.740 particularly when englishmen and scotsmen argue about things argue about history who beat who at
00:14:58.820 certain times an Englishman can always point to Floddenfield and say ah we served you up a treat
00:15:03.940 there we stitched you up like a kipper on that one didn't we but it does set the tone for Henry
00:15:09.420 VIII and the Scots right he wasn't constantly constantly worrying about invasions from the
00:15:15.980 Scots because early on he deals them out uh although not personally deals them out a mortal
00:15:21.520 blow at Floddenfield says in the darkness the survivors of the struggle the Scottish survivors
00:15:27.660 of the struggle dispersed and fled home the death of their warlike sovereign and the slaughter
00:15:32.960 which had thinned their fighting men kept the scots quiet for many a day during the long and
00:15:38.540 minority of king james the fifth of scotland king henry need fear no danger from the north
00:15:45.160 as a reward for his victory surrey was restored to his father's dukedom of norfolk and again that
00:15:52.660 was in 1513. So Thomas Howard is the Duke of Norfolk. So already we've introduced a couple
00:16:00.460 of key players here. Suffolk, his friend, his brother-in-law and friend, actual friend, and
00:16:05.760 Norfolk of the Howard family. One of, if not the main sort of military man, Henry VIII's go-to
00:16:12.800 military man. If you need to put down a rebellion somewhere or other, the obvious choice is get in
00:16:18.480 touch with Norfolk. He can do that. You know, he won at Flodden. Tried and tested.
00:16:23.880 We hope you enjoyed that video and if you did please head over to
00:16:27.360 lotusseaters.com for the full unabridged video.