The Saad Truth with Dr. Saad

00:00:01.000 Hi, everybody. It's been about four weeks that I haven't hosted a guest because I've

00:00:05.980 been traveling a lot, started a new semester. But boy, do I have a good one to kick off

00:00:10.460 the fall semester. Sage Steele, how are you doing?

00:00:13.460 Great. Thank you for having me. This is kind of cool that you asked.

00:00:17.480 Well, I'm very excited to have you. Let me just read some of your key biometrics. And

00:00:22.500 as we were talking offline, father time catches up to you. So I actually have to wear the

00:00:27.780 old man glasses. You were at ESPN for 16 years from 2007 to 2023. You were a broadcaster

00:00:34.840 and a lead anchor. You were a host of SportsCenter, the network's flagship show. You've hosted many

00:00:40.980 leading national and international events, including the Super Bowl, the Masters, the NBA

00:00:44.980 finals, the World Series, but not only sports, the Scripps National Spelling Bee. That's kind

00:00:49.380 of cool. And the Miss America pageant. Did I cover some of the key highlights or do you

00:00:53.200 want to add anything before we get going?

00:00:54.560 That is plenty. But I love the spelling bee love there, because honestly, that was one

00:00:59.400 of the coolest events I've ever covered. And they're like, it's not a sport. I'm like,

00:01:02.400 no, but it's a competition. It's a good competition.

00:01:05.480 So maybe we could start with how did you decide? You know, we're going to get into your story

00:01:10.420 with ESPN. But how did you first decide sportscasting is what I want to do? I want to go to Indiana

00:01:16.540 University and pursue that. And I ask this because you may or may not know this. I have a sports

00:01:22.060 broadcasting superstar in my own family. Maybe, you know, have you heard of Arielle Helwani?

00:01:28.800 No way. I know Arielle. 0.99

00:01:30.900 You know, Arielle? Well, Arielle is my maternal nephew.

00:01:34.180 No way. I love him. Tell him hi. He's going to be watching.

00:01:37.800 I will. From a very young age, he always said he loved wrestling. He loved all these cons. And he

00:01:43.240 actually pursued his passion and turned it into a profession. Do you have a similar story?

00:01:47.540 Yes. But my goodness, I haven't seen Arielle in a long time. Give him a hug for me.

00:01:53.020 I was sports obsessed from a very young age. I have a father who played college football at an

00:01:58.980 army at West Point. And I brag because he did so in historical fashion. He broke the color barrier.

00:02:04.880 He's the first black man ever to play varsity football at West Point back in like 1966. So

00:02:10.620 some history there. And he was actually a pretty damn good athlete as well. And so dad kind of

00:02:16.560 started it. And then I have two younger brothers. Honestly, I knew at a really young age the power

00:02:22.360 of sports. And I can say that now. But even talking to my parents about when I announced to them when

00:02:27.880 I was 11 years old at the dinner table that I wanted to be a sportscaster, I knew it wasn't I

00:02:32.160 wasn't going to be a great athlete. I thought the second best thing would be to talk about and to tell

00:02:35.460 people's stories. And even at that young age, I remember watching the 84 Olympics and going, I want

00:02:40.260 to I want to understand how these athletes are not just good, but great at the ultimate moment when

00:02:47.320 the entire world is watching with one chance to run that 100 meter dash. Right. I was just in awe

00:02:53.940 of kind of the mental toughness to go along with the physical gifts and talents. And it wanted to tell

00:02:59.540 stories from a really young age. And did your I mean, did your parents do the stereotypical thing of

00:03:05.160 being disappointed that you're not becoming a physician or a corporate lawyer? Or were they

00:03:09.240 like, Oh, you found your passion. Let's go with it. They knew that the what you mentioned, their

00:03:14.660 position or corporate lawyer, that was not ever gonna be in the cards for me. I think they like

00:03:19.740 to think that Oh, she has other things she's good at. What they did say was really? Because I was so

00:03:27.180 shy. I was painfully shy. And I this sounds weird. But I like I didn't talk to many people besides

00:03:35.000 people in my family. I had a couple friends, but I was super, super shy. And like, Okay, well,

00:03:40.440 this is a good dream. And if you want to be on television, then you're probably going to have to

00:03:45.380 talk a little more. So it was really from day one, like if this is your dream, and let's talk about

00:03:51.180 why but if it's your dream, then you're going to have to come out of your shell, you're gonna have

00:03:56.200 to get comfortable being uncomfortable, basically, which is a line that Nick Saban taught me a few years

00:04:00.380 ago. And I use it with my kids, too. So from a young age, I had to learn to get out of that comfort

00:04:05.420 zone, if I wanted to pursue this dream. And sometimes I admit, I look even when I was on ESPN,

00:04:12.460 and I was like, How, how did this actually happen? But I had to kind of, you know, make that decision

00:04:17.380 to be uncomfortable. What was what were some of the mechanisms that you use to overcome your shyness?

00:04:23.820 It was, you know, being forced by my parents. Sometimes it was as simple as we had some neighbor

00:04:29.340 girls in this neighborhood we had moved into in Colorado Springs. And, you know, they had their 1.00

00:04:33.760 group and their clique, and they didn't need a new kid. And so my parents were like, Okay,

00:04:37.620 do you want friends? Well, then you have to go make that happen. Go knock on her door,

00:04:43.200 see if she wants to play, see if she wants to ride bikes. I remember that. Also, I was actually we

00:04:50.480 lived in Belgium, my dad was in the military for 23 years. And one of his the many places we lived was

00:04:54.920 in Belgium. And while there, my mom actually talked to some doctors about trying to help kids

00:05:00.900 overcome shyness. And one thing these doctors suggested was to bring me around horses. And so

00:05:07.040 I got into the equestrian sport, the beautiful equestrian sport, which by the way, we had no

00:05:11.080 business doing it with on an army salary. That's the wrong business to try to, you know, wrong salary

00:05:17.300 to try to be successful in that business, and that sport. But for me, it wasn't about that.

00:05:21.500 My parents somehow sacrificed, my mom got a second job to help pay for me to ride,

00:05:26.900 because horses are very therapeutic. And what it did was it made me as an 11 year old kid,

00:05:32.300 because I started right away after I announced this dream. In hindsight, it makes you feel needed,

00:05:38.080 that this animal needs you to stay alive. And so it gave me this confidence that I was needed. And I

00:05:46.140 it's not like I felt unneeded through at home or with my family, it was just different. And it gave

00:05:52.560 me that confidence to try new things to walk into the barn. And we had very strict British instructors,

00:05:59.640 and they were adamant about certain things. And I had to stand tall. And I had to speak up for myself

00:06:03.980 if I wanted to be around the horses. So who knew, you know, I now know how therapeutic and helpful

00:06:08.700 animals can be. You know, it's, it's, it's very, I don't know if the right word would be soothing,

00:06:14.400 but it's actually motivating to hear someone who was so public, that that you faced some of those

00:06:20.880 difficulties. Because oftentimes, people think that high profile people, you know, don't get nervous,

00:06:27.620 don't suffer from anxiety, right. And so I'll tell you a couple of stories that I think, you know,

00:06:32.060 will resonate well with with with the story that you just shared. So I had a personal friend who's

00:06:38.320 a physician to, you know, high profile athletes, I had him on my show a few years ago. And as we were

00:06:45.220 chatting, I said, Can I take a guess as to what is the number one ailment that these high profile

00:06:51.140 athletes come and see you about? What is it? And he goes, so he was kind of quizzical, he didn't know

00:06:57.160 why I would be able to guess that. And he goes, Sure, go ahead. I said, anxiety disorders. And he said,

00:07:02.860 exactly. So you know, you you mythologize the athletes as you you did in the 1984, you know,

00:07:09.340 the 100 meter, you know, gladiator sprinter, you think that they are impervious to some of these

00:07:15.220 very human frailties. But if anything, what makes them champions is that they face the exact same

00:07:20.820 anxieties that the rest of us face, but then they somehow overcome them. Does that does that make

00:07:25.880 sense? Yeah, it does. And I think people ask me that all the time as well. Like, do you get nervous?

00:07:31.800 And the answer is, yes, but I know how to handle it now. And I know where to channel it. And I

00:07:38.440 actually think that adrenaline rush that I get right before I go on air or do an important show

00:07:43.480 like yours, you know, it's, it's excitement. And what I find, though, is about a minute or two before

00:07:50.000 I go on the air, I get really calm, like I'll have a tough hour or so leading up to it. Because when I

00:07:55.180 was on ESPN, it's, it's, I mean, you're live, and it's across the country every single day. And I did

00:07:59.680 two hours live every day. But we did all the writing, you know, researchers helped us with

00:08:04.860 a lot of things and producers, but everything that we really said on camera and back and forth

00:08:09.840 interviewing other athletes or analysts, we wrote that. So I was able to realize to remind myself when

00:08:16.500 I would get tight and anxious, wait, you're prepared, you're ready for this, because you did

00:08:21.520 the work, no one wrote the stuff for me, those were my words. And therefore, you can make it

00:08:25.320 conversational and, and take away the pressure of having to say things exactly perfectly.

00:08:30.240 But it has taken many years. I don't want to lose that, though. And I'm sure a lot of the athletes

00:08:34.900 have said that to you as well, right? If, if we lose that adrenaline, then we lose our edge,

00:08:40.340 ability to come out and perform and be your best. So now I know that I thrive on it. I just look back

00:08:46.860 and laugh a little bit about that, that kid who was scared of her own shadow. And I'll say this,

00:08:51.220 too, because you'll appreciate it, especially early on in my career. I've always talked too fast,

00:08:55.760 all my bosses have yelled at me for it. And I slow down here and there. But at the end of the day,

00:08:58.880 they gave up and they realized it's just, it's just me and kind of who I am. But in order to not

00:09:04.220 get sick to my stomach, with nerves and anxiety, at the beginning stages of my career, what I would do

00:09:11.900 is when I'd look in the camera lens, like I am now, I would picture my dad. Wow, like I was on the

00:09:17.940 couch, having a football conversation, like I did when I was 12 years old on a football Sunday with

00:09:23.240 my dad, so that you're telling a story, you're not giving a report, or you're not conducting an

00:09:28.520 interview, you're having a conversation, you're telling a story. And that allowed me to let go

00:09:33.680 of the nerves and to really be me on camera. That's beautiful. I want to come back to your,

00:09:39.380 your what seems to be a very powerful bond that you have with your dad, I want to come back to that

00:09:44.080 and share some of my own bond with my own daughter in a second. But just to kind of close

00:09:49.460 the the parenthesis on, you know, anxiety and stress, I had about, I think it was about five

00:09:55.160 years ago, I had the lead singer of the stylistics. I don't know if you know who do you know the

00:10:01.340 stylistics? Are you familiar with that group? No, no, the stylistics were part of a genre of music

00:10:06.500 called the Philly sound, which was a type of soul music from the late 60s, early 70s, this kind of very

00:10:13.280 romantic haunting music. And and there are several groups that fit that genre, the stylistics, the

00:10:18.680 delphonics, the moments. Well, I grew up as a young kid with this guy, Russell Tompkins Jr. singing in

00:10:25.720 my ear as a child, even before I knew how to speak English. I mean, I grew up in Lebanon. And to, you

00:10:31.060 know, four decades later, to be having him on my show just seemed like completely impossible. How could

00:10:37.040 it be that our worlds would ever intersect? He's about 20 years older than me. But in any case, the reason

00:10:41.540 why I'm telling you the story, Sage, is because here's this, you know, world renowned soul singer,

00:10:47.180 you would think he's got it together, you would think that there's absolutely no reason for him to

00:10:51.140 ever experience any, you know, jitters before going on. And I asked him on the show, I said,

00:10:57.580 do you get nervous before going on? And I was praying and hoping that he would say an emphatic yes,

00:11:04.420 because then I would use that answer to motivate my students when they're deathly afraid to do their

00:11:09.560 oral presentation. I said, look, hey, if Russell Tompkins Jr., the legendary soul singer can get

00:11:14.620 nervous, it's okay for you too. And his answer was, oh, I can hardly stand up. I feel like my legs are

00:11:20.900 going to buckle. But what does he have to be? Logically, rationally, thousands of people have

00:11:26.980 paid to come and listen to you sing. You clearly know how to sing. And yet you're scared. And when I

00:11:34.040 tell that story to my students, I see kind of the weight coming off them. Because if Lionel Messi or

00:11:39.540 Michael Jordan or this singer can get nervous, we all can get nervous. Yes. I love that he was honest

00:11:46.940 too, because I think sometimes, you know, when people are being asked certain questions like,

00:11:51.900 no, no, no, or they minimize it. One thing I've found in the last couple of years through some

00:11:56.920 adversity personally and professionally is the more people open up and share and are honest. I mean,

00:12:04.880 not only is it helpful for other people, like you're saying to your students to realize, yeah,

00:12:10.000 even people at this level of whatever industry, they get nervous. It's almost therapeutic. It's

00:12:14.400 been therapeutic for me to be able to share it and then to continue to push through it. So

00:12:19.140 vulnerability and then talking about those things and those, I don't even want to characterize

00:12:23.760 it as a weakness when we get nervous or anxiety. No, I view it now. I've taken it at least and used

00:12:29.860 it as a strength because I know that I can make it come out with the energy that I'm using. And it's

00:12:34.620 all genuine, you know, but I love that he was vulnerable and honest with you. He didn't have to

00:12:40.240 be, you know, I do that. I think it's a win for everybody. Yeah, no, absolutely. I faced a similar sort

00:12:46.840 of bifurcation in deciding whether I wanted to share a personal story or not. A few years ago,

00:12:53.660 out of the blue, I had what felt like, oh my God, am I having a heart attack? I was driving with my

00:13:01.960 wife and kids. I was not in any way consciously, you know, stressed. I wasn't ruminating over anything.

00:13:10.080 And I started getting this tightness of breathing. My fingers started tingling. And so we stopped on

00:13:17.720 the side. I said to my wife, I think you have to drive me to the emergency room. I don't know what's

00:13:21.880 happening to me. So she drives me to the emergency room. It turned out to be a panic attack, which was

00:13:27.600 the first one and the only one that I've ever had. I tend to be reason. I mean, I'm an intense person,

00:13:32.460 but I'm quite chill. I don't know exactly what triggered it. But to our conversation, I was trying

00:13:40.160 to decide, should I share this or does it go contrary to my being the happy warrior, the honey

00:13:47.020 badger? And then I thought, but that would be inauthentic if I don't share that. I also talk about the

00:13:51.700 importance of authenticity. And so I went on the biggest possible platform in the world, Joe Rogan,

00:13:58.520 and I shared that panic story. And then tons of people wrote to me and said, you don't know how

00:14:03.260 much solace it gave me that you shared that. So you're exactly right. It takes a lot of courage

00:14:08.420 to actually show vulnerability and weakness. And I think it goes back even further to

00:14:13.880 letting go of caring what everybody else thinks too. That's why people tend to not. And I'm listen,

00:14:21.660 I don't have the background you do, certainly. But just through my own experiences, you know,

00:14:26.560 once you let go of caring what everybody thinks, then you're more able to be vulnerable and to

00:14:34.780 share those things. And every time I have, yeah, the feedback I've gotten has been completely

00:14:40.380 overwhelming. That's brought me to tears at times when people have said, you know, thank you for

00:14:44.980 sharing this. Thank you for standing up and being uncomfortable. And it is scary. But then you realize

00:14:50.720 every single time you push through that fear of sharing something, for instance, then the next time

00:14:55.240 it gets a little bit easier. And I just, I feel fortunate to have realized it later than I would

00:15:01.120 have liked. I try to tell this to my kids now, no, be open, say whatever you want and be yourselves

00:15:06.500 and don't wait so long. And that's, that's the biggest thing too, right? Is that if we continue to

00:15:11.240 do this and share on the biggest platforms, like, like you said, with what you did with Joe Rogan,

00:15:16.840 others are going to hopefully be better than us. And that's what we want for the younger generation.

00:15:22.220 Indeed. I want to get into all the ESPN stuff and the woke stuff and freedom of speech and all that

00:15:27.660 in a second. But since we touched on the threat of your dad, before I ask you the question, so I,

00:15:34.340 well, I listened to your chat with the Megan Kelly. That's how I really became familiar with,

00:15:39.760 with your story. And I said, Oh, I have to reach out to this lady. She seems fantastic.

00:15:43.300 Uh, and one thing that came out, you know, very clearly is the incredible love you have for your

00:15:51.840 parents, your family, but there seems to be this really incredible reverence and love. I mean,

00:15:58.940 I'm sure for your mom too, but specifically to your dad, maybe you could tell us about that. And

00:16:03.560 then I'll share some of my bonds with my own children as a, as a backup to your story.

00:16:08.080 Yeah. I would, I would love to hear that with you and your kids. And, um, I, I talked my,

00:16:14.020 you heard me right before we started to record, right? My mom called and like, hi mom. And I'm

00:16:18.800 listen, I'm almost 51 years old. I talked to my parents at least twice a day.

00:16:22.900 You're never too old to need too old to need your mommy or your daddy. And I, I'm just so grateful

00:16:27.640 that, um, they're here and, um, that we have this incredible friendship now, but still respect

00:16:33.540 because as much as I try to remind my teenagers about this, listen, the parents of the parents,

00:16:38.940 kids of the kids, there's a pecking order here, stay in your lane. Um, but I, I just remember,

00:16:45.460 and I have these great pictures of me as a really little girl. Um, when my dad was stationed back

00:16:50.920 at West point, he went back actually to help to coach football. He was the plea, the freshman coach

00:16:55.960 from 1974 to 1977, one of them. And there's these awesome pictures my mom has of me in his sweatshirt.

00:17:03.100 Uh, which went from my shoulders down to my ankles and his big guy, uh, at, at his peak before he

00:17:09.400 started to shrink, he was six, six and a half. And especially back in that day, I mean, that was

00:17:13.260 massive. Right. And so that his, I would just swim in his sweatshirt and be waiting for him to walk in

00:17:18.400 the door, um, with a football in my hand. And then I'd run out to him and I don't, I don't know,

00:17:23.680 just see, this is when I get choked up is when I talk about my parents, but just such an incredible,

00:17:27.980 uh, bond. And, and I do think it, it was cemented very early on, um, with all the moving we had to

00:17:35.600 do. And when you are kind of a nomad and you, and you don't have a place to call home, um, because of

00:17:41.940 the military and I wouldn't change a thing, but what you have is each other. And so I have two younger

00:17:48.000 brothers and it's such the five of us and we are so close, but in particular, the three of us are close

00:17:53.000 with our parents. And my dad, I think I go back to feeling, um, like he was so strong and just

00:18:02.660 protected me and always had my back in, in every way, but then also really challenged me and pushed

00:18:09.620 me and believed in me and pushed me when I didn't want him to certainly, especially when you're a

00:18:13.440 young kid and you're a teenager. Um, and so it was a lot of tough love, but the love part was key.

00:18:18.640 And he always came back around and we had a lot of fun rituals when I was a little girl at night,

00:18:22.480 certain things we'd say and do everything was always a competition. We'd have a, um, a, uh,

00:18:27.500 bedroom inspection every Saturday morning, just like his days at West point. And he'd knock twice

00:18:33.120 and we'd have to salute and he'd say, are you prepared for inspection? Of course you say, yes,

00:18:36.680 sir. And he marches in there and every infraction was 10 pushups. Yeah. I always say that I was jacked

00:18:43.980 as a young girl. I had great arms because I had a lot of bedroom infractions from the moment I was

00:18:47.740 like four years old. Um, but there was so much love with the respect and the discipline. And I grew

00:18:53.840 quickly to respect that. Um, and I think it's quite often there's this image or the stereotype of

00:19:00.880 military men and just so rigid and not warm and loving. And I just had the exact opposite experience.

00:19:07.060 But when he walked in a room, especially at six, six and a half, 235 pounds, as my father,

00:19:14.060 we stood at attention. You don't mess around, but he never yelled. He was just super calm. So anyway,

00:19:18.880 I'm getting into too much, but I, that love and respect that my father gave me and gives me

00:19:25.160 is absolutely priceless. I think there is something special between a father and a daughter. Um,

00:19:30.720 very different and mothers and sons. And I have a son and two daughters. I kind of have,

00:19:34.880 you know, feel all of it. Um, but man, um, my dad is my guy and, uh, no one will ever replace him.

00:19:43.460 You don't know how much this is music to my ears. Uh, so let me now share my story. So we have two,

00:19:49.520 two kids. One is 14, one is 11. The, the, the 14 year old is the daughter. So she's now knee deep

00:19:56.380 into the adolescence and the teenage stuff. And about two years ago, I went through a little, um,

00:20:03.080 mini, uh, not, I mean, depression would be a big word, but I felt this deep existential blueness.

00:20:10.880 If, if I can put it that way, because I realized that she had, uh, passed the doll playing stage

00:20:19.260 so that, you know, she was my little girl, but now there were clear markers physiologically. I mean,

00:20:26.320 morphologically, she didn't look as much of a little girl. And so, and in her, you know, behavioral

00:20:32.740 patterns, the dolls that we used to play with together, and we even taped some of our play

00:20:37.440 sessions, she was no longer interested in. And I had to kind of, uh, mourn the loss of that

00:20:44.720 cognitive developmental stage, uh, akin to how, you know, you mourn the loss of, of, I mean, God forbid

00:20:50.680 of a death, but there was the death of her very, very young childhood. Right. And she was moving to

00:20:56.340 another stage. And I remember when she realized that I was feeling those, uh, those moments of

00:21:02.320 sadness, she actually insisted that we play with each other with the dolls, but that actually made

00:21:08.200 sorry. No way. She felt that. Yeah. But here's the thing you're, I think you'll appreciate this.

00:21:14.800 It actually made me more sad because I realized that it was forced. It was terribly sensitive of

00:21:22.720 her, what she was trying to do. She was trying to assuage my feelings by saying, no, no, I'm still

00:21:27.000 your little girl. I still want to play, but I could clearly see that she had passed that developmental

00:21:32.300 stage. So when I hear you speak about your dad in a manner that still the dynamic is still, you're his

00:21:39.600 little girl. It gives me great hope because I want, I pray that when my daughter is your age and

00:21:46.840 as accomplished as you are, that she'll be speaking about me in that way, because otherwise life would

00:21:53.280 be unbearable. If I thought that, you know, she's off, she flies the coop and that's it. Right. 1.00

00:22:00.140 You know, but I just hearing that story, you have nothing to worry about. The fact that she is so

00:22:05.940 sensitive and empathetic to, um, at a young age to see and feel what you're going through with this,

00:22:13.120 that's beautiful. And you can't teach that. So you did something right there. Number one,

00:22:17.480 number two, one thing, my dad to this day, he'll say it about once a week. And he says it in emails

00:22:23.500 and text messages. And when we say, I love you, he will tack on what he's been saying for 51 years.

00:22:32.000 Me more. He said, no, we don't have that one. He's, he calls me his little 11 month old Sagey

00:22:38.040 because when I was 11 months old, apparently, listen, I was, um, super athletic walking at a

00:22:43.740 very young age. Didn't turn out so well as far as the athletic side, but, um, I mean, running to him

00:22:49.340 at 11 months old when he would come home from work. And so that's what he, and then you run in his arms

00:22:54.440 and you know, the, the, the, the dad thing, what you guys do when you throw us up in the air.

00:22:57.540 And so he literally still will say my little 11 month old Sagey. And then I'm like, dad,

00:23:03.440 stop because now I'm old and I cry all the time. Um, so it's, it's something that is to me,

00:23:09.900 the most important relationship in a young girl's life. Um, and it certainly continues into adulthood.

00:23:16.100 And I always implore, uh, guys, friends of mine with daughters, um, that is everything.

00:23:24.120 Um, don't screw it up. Meaning don't think it's all just going to happen. You have to go make that

00:23:29.580 effort and it is everything. And it is lasting and it affects almost every decision they make in life.

00:23:34.100 Right. I'll, I'll, I'll say one last thing about this and then we can move on to other topics.

00:23:38.260 Uh, so I just came back from Hungary where I spoke at a summit called the Budapest demographic summit,

00:23:45.020 uh, talking about the importance of families trying to increase fertility rates in Western countries,

00:23:51.020 because many of the Western countries don't even have a, are not even meeting the replacement rate,

00:23:55.780 you know, another word, meaning that more people are dying than kids being created. And so in that,

00:24:02.220 in, in my keynote address, I was talking about some of the evolutionary reasons why family dynamics

00:24:07.780 exist in the way that they do and so on. And so to our conversation about the importance of fathers,

00:24:12.720 I cited some work, which I hope you'll find interesting.

00:24:16.700 So it turns out that father presence or father absence in a home affects the, the, the timing of

00:24:26.020 when a girl gets her first menses, uh, which the fancy term is menarche or in French it's menache so

00:24:33.720 that, you know, some girls will get at 11, some girls will get at 13 and an environmental predictor

00:24:39.120 of when that time happens is if the father is absent, then, uh, girls go into their reproductive 0.99

00:24:46.740 window earlier. And so even at this physiological level, so nevermind the emotional level and the

00:24:54.000 support and all of the things that we would expect affect the development of children in general and

00:25:00.640 daughters in particular, but something as intimate and as physiological as the timing of their menstrual

00:25:07.200 cycle is determined in part by the presence or absence of a father.

00:25:11.980 I have never heard that. And that is fascinating. And I was 15.

00:25:17.200 Is that right? Well, there you go. It supports that. He was super present. It delayed it, uh, as far as you

00:25:24.020 could take it.

00:25:25.040 Which good. Listen, you guys have no idea, right? Delay it as long as possible.

00:25:30.520 Right. I hear you.

00:25:31.200 That's fascinating.

00:25:32.500 All right. So let's get now into, uh, ESPN. You're on Jay Cutler's podcast. You say, I think

00:25:40.060 I saw three things, but maybe there are more. Take us through that story and the trajectory that

00:25:45.500 happened after that.

00:25:46.120 No, you, you take me through it. Oh gosh. Which part, which parts stood out to you?

00:25:51.280 Okay. So I, I just, cause I wanted to know what were the controversial things that got

00:25:56.800 you into trouble. And from my understanding, having just quickly perused through, through

00:26:01.160 the material, I didn't listen to the actual podcast. It was number one, it was your positions

00:26:07.080 on, you know, questioning some of the COVID vaccine mandates. Number two, critiquing the

00:26:12.700 fact that, uh, women were scantily clad. I couldn't tell whether that was a general statement

00:26:18.460 or it applied specifically to female sports broadcasters. And then number three, you took

00:26:24.300 issue with Barack Obama calling himself a black man when he had a, you know, a white parent

00:26:30.780 and a black parent, not unlike how your reality is. Are those the three main issues that got 0.85

00:26:36.140 you into quote hot water?

00:26:37.980 Yes, they are. Uh, let me start with the last one because, um, I do, and I'll say this to

00:26:45.620 the end and as a journalist for 28 years, context matters and the conversation surrounding that

00:26:50.940 matters. Um, I think that's the one that bothers me the most that was taken out of context because

00:26:56.520 most people don't have time or don't take the time from the journalistic side, really, as

00:27:01.280 far as how it was handled, when it all went down two years ago to really listen. Um, instead

00:27:06.740 of just clicking on, you know, a link, that's a 18 second soundbite, the conversation surrounding

00:27:13.480 it matters. Um, and with that, it, it, I was actually telling a story about when I was on

00:27:20.400 the view, uh, in 2014 on ABC with Barbara Walters, uh, and Whoopi Goldberg and the other

00:27:26.940 two cohosts, Sherry Shepard and Jenny McCarthy, who they were all lovely, really, really kind

00:27:32.380 to me. Um, and fun. Uh, and Barbara really took issue with the fact that I called myself 0.99

00:27:40.060 biracial and why not black is what she said. So this is the complete story I told on Jay

00:27:45.460 Cutler, but what came out is that Sage was criticizing Barack Obama. Um, it wasn't really

00:27:50.820 the case. I guess it could be perceived that way. But when Barbara said, um, well, the president

00:27:55.600 calls himself black, why, why don't you? Um, and I said, well, congratulations to the 0.95

00:28:01.700 president. He can do what he wants. Again, it's 2014. He was president. And I said, I think

00:28:04.840 it's fascinating that, um, you know, his black father was not there. His white mother

00:28:11.060 and his white grandmother raised him. I mean, Barack Obama wrote a book about this in the

00:28:14.880 absence of his father. So this was not breaking news, but to me, it was interesting that he,

00:28:19.460 uh, didn't want to at all identify with half of who he is as a biracial man. That was my take

00:28:26.360 on. I said, you do you for me, it does matter. And I always say the joke and I always will.

00:28:31.440 I'm like, I'm pretty sure my white mom was there the day I was born. And I think that she matters

00:28:36.440 as much as my black dad. So that's what it was. It was really that simple. And I'll always say

00:28:41.540 that I would love someday. That's one of my dreams is to be able to have a conversation

00:28:44.940 with Barack Obama and any, um, public facing biracial person, because I think it is something

00:28:51.160 that it's a thing now. And if you don't say I'm black, then you're a racist or you hate your race 0.96

00:28:56.920 or you hate black people. The things that I get is, oh gosh, she hates her black father. It's all fake. 1.00

00:29:00.880 Look at what she said about, about, so listen, that goes back to us saying, you got to let go

00:29:06.300 of people hating you, um, or what they think of you. We pay attention to a certain extent because

00:29:11.480 we're human, but I know what I said. Most importantly, I know how I feel and how I treat

00:29:16.840 others regardless of race. And I'm really super proud, um, that I have the most loving, diverse

00:29:24.000 family, um, where my white family loves me as much as my black family. I'm close to everyone.

00:29:30.880 And I love seeing our big family picture where you don't know who goes with whom because there's

00:29:35.460 all different colors and mixes and that's America to me. So I just think it's important for me

00:29:41.920 to identify with all of what I am. That's literally what I am. Half of each, uh, Barack Obama doesn't

00:29:49.880 choose to, that's him. When I'm asked the question, I gave an answer. So that would, that was the gist

00:29:54.920 of it. And I will, um, not apologize for how I choose to, uh, be proud of all of me.

00:30:01.260 And so as a result of you making those statements that proved to be, you know, contentious for

00:30:07.900 the ESPN overlords, they suspended you at that point. Is that what, is that what happened?

00:30:13.680 Yes. And initially it was more because, um, of what I said about my employer at the time,

00:30:18.660 which was, um, that I, and I struggled with it. I had literally just come from getting the vaccine

00:30:25.440 that I didn't want to get. Um, and I had come through and, and so people look at, at the time,

00:30:30.140 you can see in the video with the podcast, I had a bandaid on my shoulder and I, they were like,

00:30:34.060 oh, that's a prop. And it wasn't, I literally sprinted from this grocery store parking lot

00:30:38.320 where I got the shot at the pharmacy. And, and I was late because I wasn't, I almost didn't get

00:30:42.520 the shot. I was going to potentially, I was going to lose my job over it. I felt so strongly because

00:30:47.000 this is two years ago and we didn't know enough in my opinion. I just wanted to wait. Um, and so I

00:30:52.600 sprinted back in and flipped up the laptop and we started talking. And, uh, so I held back a lot on my

00:30:57.600 opinions at that moment. And I just said, I think it's sick and scary for companies to force

00:31:03.180 people to do something to their bodies, period. Um, but I said, but I, I worked for a global

00:31:08.920 company, Disney. So I wasn't terribly surprised and companies had that right to force people to do

00:31:15.120 that. Um, most importantly, I complied, I complied with the mandate, uh, against my will, but I complied

00:31:23.020 and I had to make that decision for myself because I not only love my job, but I needed my job. Um,

00:31:28.480 and so I, I, that was the thing I can share an opinion, um, while following the rules.

00:31:36.400 And was there something, I mean, yes, you had just gotten the job and therefore that's top of

00:31:41.660 mind awareness at the moment. But what, what was there sort of a trajectory that you were going

00:31:47.220 through that led to the tipping point of this is it. I'm no longer modulating my speech and I'm

00:31:52.880 going to let it all hang out or, you know, or had you not even been aware of some of these issues

00:31:58.020 and you kind of found your voice. I mean, what I mean by your voice in terms of going against some

00:32:02.580 of the established orthodoxy that the company would expect of you to know, I didn't think I'd

00:32:08.220 done anything wrong. Right. Because I followed the rules and I got the shot. I did what I had to do

00:32:12.440 in the very last day possible to be fully vaccinated by September 30th, 2021. That was the mandate.

00:32:16.840 Um, so this was whatever, 14 days prior, you needed two weeks. Right. So it's like exactly

00:32:22.760 two years ago. So no, I didn't think I didn't, I'd done anything wrong. Um, it's interesting

00:32:27.520 because it was really one of the first times I had, I had mentioned the fact that I'd gotten

00:32:31.920 divorced. And, um, so I was more concerned about that. Like, oh gosh, I, I really revealed something

00:32:38.660 very personal. Um, and I didn't know how that would go over if I'd be, you know, criticized for that

00:32:43.740 as a Catholic. Like I was more concerned about that than my opinion on a mandate that I complied

00:32:49.240 with. Um, and then obviously my experience as a biracial woman, um, that's my experience. That's

00:32:56.420 my story. So what's wrong with me sharing my, my story, everyone else can, and actually everyone

00:33:02.720 else, um, for years and years, and especially the last two years has been very vocal, uh, my former

00:33:08.620 place of work about things that have nothing to do with themselves or sports. Um, people are going

00:33:14.820 on, you know, our programming NBA shows and emotional over the Roe versus Wade decision on an,

00:33:20.420 on a sports show on our platform. So to me, I'm talking about my own personal experiences on a day

00:33:24.700 off on someone else's platform. Um, I was not concerned at all. I was pretty shocked. I, but it

00:33:30.000 wasn't a, it wasn't a concerted effort. Like I'm going to stand up to this today. Um, it was a question

00:33:34.560 that was asked and, uh, I answered him and answered him honestly. Wow. Uh, are you familiar

00:33:41.020 with Jonathan Isaac? Do you know who that is? I know Jonathan quite well. Yes. Oh yeah. Okay. So

00:33:45.760 he, he came on my show, uh, I think it was about a year ago. And, uh, you know, I thought just what

00:33:52.160 a lovely, courageous young man. And, uh, we, I, I used to be, before he came on my show, I would post

00:33:59.480 clips of me doing some basketball moves and, you know, getting a three pointer. And I'd say,

00:34:03.880 Jonathan, are you ready? Cause I'm going to kick your butt. So when he came on my, of course I 1.00

00:34:08.980 wouldn't even get one point on him. He's seven foot tall and I'm hardly that. And, uh, I just

00:34:13.700 thought he was so charming, so lovely, so courageous that he says, I don't care. I'm not going to abide

00:34:18.960 by the things. So the reason I'm setting it, setting up the question this way, what then explains

00:34:24.680 the fact that so many athletes who to our earlier point of, you know, being these mythical heroes

00:34:31.780 that we admire, why are so many of them so cowardly when it comes to enunciating their

00:34:38.700 positions? What is the disconnect between me being able to step on the field in front

00:34:43.060 of a hundred thousand people and be a hero? But then when you ask me to comment about something

00:34:47.840 that I should be able to defend one way or another, I turn into a completely castrated 1.00

00:34:52.320 moron. Castrated moron. I love it. Um, it's fear, fear. And it is interesting because you 1.00

00:35:02.120 look at many of these people, you know, we society does as, like you said, as heroic in

00:35:07.820 many ways. And, and, and most importantly, maybe our pillar of strength physically and mentally.

00:35:12.960 So then to see them go silent, I know so many of these top big name athletes who did not want

00:35:22.040 to take the shot period. Um, and I don't know that all of them did, even though that might seem that

00:35:28.320 way. Uh, but no one said anything about it except to Aaron Rogers and Kyrie Irving. Um, I admire them.

00:35:36.560 I know them both. I admire them so much for that courage because it, it, unfortunately it does take

00:35:41.600 courage to give your opinion on things like this right now, whether people agree or not, that's not

00:35:47.280 what this is. It's about having respect for everybody's opinion period, especially if they're not

00:35:54.560 telling you what to do with your body or your opinion, you keep yours. I'll keep mine. You do you.

00:36:00.600 That's what we always say, right? Until all of a sudden we're forced not to, um, I listen, I've said

00:36:04.820 it before. I feel like I'm, I'm a great example as to why people do stay silent because there are

00:36:10.520 repercussions when you speak up and when you're your true self. Um, there's a lot of money on the

00:36:15.000 line. I experienced that part, but with those athletes, it's a hundred fold, right? I mean,

00:36:20.760 it's tens of millions of dollars. That's why, when you look back at what Kyrie Irving did,

00:36:24.000 people can say what they want about Kyrie. I understand he's controversial. He's different,

00:36:27.360 whatever. Um, but Kyrie in this moment with this example, uh, chose to say, no, my $34 million

00:36:34.360 annual contract, um, come secondary to me standing up for what I believe in and what I believe

00:36:40.340 is best for my body. Uh, and, and then pointing out the hypocrisies of the mandates throughout

00:36:46.560 the sports world. Um, and so I admire them for doing it anyway and the flack that they

00:36:53.860 took. And now it's interesting because a year, two years later, the tide has certainly turned

00:36:58.600 and we have learned more and more. So regardless of anyone's opinion, um, I, that's the thing

00:37:04.200 that makes me sick is when you're, you're attacked for just being you when that's what everyone's

00:37:11.780 preaching right now, right? Be true to yourselves. And it doesn't matter whether it's race, gender,

00:37:19.060 all the different gender things that are out there now. I mean, let's just be consistent to

00:37:24.920 me. It begins and ends with diversity of thought. And that's what I hope my platform can be going

00:37:29.780 forward, Gat, is because diversity of thought, like it's easy for us to say, no, no, no, we must

00:37:34.100 accept, accept people of all different colors and races and religions and genders. That that's a given

00:37:38.660 now we have departments that DEI massive departments throughout every industry in corporate America

00:37:45.320 now, big or small DEI and equality. And to me, we're forgetting the most important thing.

00:37:51.420 It begins with diversity of thought because then if I respect your thought process, then,

00:37:57.620 then it's just, I respect how you choose to identify. I respect how you choose this and that

00:38:03.060 we are making it so much more difficult. And what we're doing is completely dividing. And yes,

00:38:09.160 in the sports world, um, it is so prevalent, but I've had so many of those guys whisper to me,

00:38:14.120 some of the biggest, one of them in particular came up to me, uh, years ago at a big sporting event.

00:38:19.640 I don't want to say it cause it might reveal who he is. Um, and he's like, I'm watching what's going

00:38:24.080 on girl. And he's like, I got you. I got you. And I'm like, do you? Because if you did, you would

00:38:30.860 not even agree. Exactly. You wouldn't do it behind the shadows. Right. And, and, and this is as big

00:38:36.340 of a person, like you, you would just say, listen, guys, stand down. Why are we attacking this woman,

00:38:42.860 this person for being true to herself? Right. Why? But instead they stay silent. And it is

00:38:49.840 interesting to me because these are men for the most part. So I don't know, I guess I grew up with

00:38:55.720 a real man in my household with my dad, who wasn't afraid to do so to speak his mind kindly and to

00:39:01.680 defend others when it wasn't even popular. And I would like to see real men stand up and women

00:39:09.200 because we are as strong, right. And as important and as brilliant and vocal to stand up and really,

00:39:17.480 just condemn the hatred that is spewed when you choose to just be yourself, it is so hypocritical

00:39:25.860 of what is being preached out there today. Right. Well, by the way, I've had many free thinkers on my

00:39:32.760 show, and many of them actually were women. Yeonmi Park, who was a North Korean defector, Ayaan Hirsi Ali,

00:39:41.080 who escaped the brutality of some of the genital female genital mutilation in Islam. And so

00:39:47.100 certainly women are holding their end of the bargain when it comes to some of these issues. 1.00

00:39:53.440 But I'll say this, what they're not doing right now is holding up their end of the bargain with the

00:39:58.560 transgender and sports issues. And the silence with that has broken my heart. I've been part of trying

00:40:05.420 to, with ESPNW had a wonderful program and bringing women together at a summit every year. And I mean,

00:40:10.720 women from across the world, the Middle East, where they're not allowed to go be female sports 1.00

00:40:17.280 journalists, we'd bring them in and mentor them. And it was hear me roar and stand tall and fight for

00:40:22.340 equality with, with wages and salaries and all the things that you see throughout the sports world with

00:40:26.800 women now. And every last one of them is silent. Yeah, literally, I'm blown away at the silence from

00:40:34.040 women with all that we've done and fought for, for 50 plus years now with Title IX. And the biggest names 1.00

00:40:40.440 are silent. And that's what breaks my heart. I can separate this is nothing against the transgender

00:40:45.960 community, because we need to figure that out. They are important. And we need to not take away not or

00:40:52.940 right, but and we need to not take away from what we have fought so hard for as women, and so many men

00:40:59.620 who have fought for us along the way, the majority of the people who helped me along the way, 99.9% of

00:41:05.180 them have been men who wanted me to succeed, despite what society wants us to believe. So I am beyond

00:41:12.000 disappointed. And I'm trying to watch my language with how silent women have been, because I feel if we 1.00

00:41:19.140 banded together, and I've asked for this on social media, who am I, right? I don't know,

00:41:22.720 but I just have this little platform. And people have watched me talk about sports and uplift women

00:41:27.080 for all these years. Like, if we came together, this would change on every level. And for some

00:41:34.700 reason, we are silent. So I do feel that remaining silent. This is it's on us if we continue to do

00:41:40.580 that. I mean, I know exactly what you're speaking of, because no industry is more woke than academia.

00:41:46.600 That's where all the woke ideas originate from. And there isn't a greater density of

00:41:51.320 cowardly, silent types more than there is in academia. So I can completely empathize what

00:41:56.940 you're saying. Two more questions, because I want to be very mindful of your time, I could keep you

00:42:01.020 here for another five hours. I know, I want to talk to you forever. Exactly. Thank you. But we'll do it

00:42:06.520 again, I'm sure. So I want to just cover one more question on wokeness. And then if we have time,

00:42:12.000 maybe we'll talk about happiness. It'll be a very short conversation. We'll make time for that.

00:42:16.580 That's it. That's important. Yes. Okay. So question one, this is coming. So one of the things that I

00:42:22.180 teach is consumer behavior. I'm a professor of marketing, as my official title. And so one of the

00:42:30.120 first principles you learn in marketing is segmenting and targeting the market, right? You segment the

00:42:35.620 market into different niches, and then you target each of those niches in different ways, because

00:42:39.980 these consumers in each of these niches have different needs, different preferences, and so on.

00:42:44.360 So now let's take the sports industry. Most of the people that you stereotypically think of

00:42:50.000 that are consumers of sports are probably going to be people who are not very woke. So think about

00:42:57.600 the Budweiser thing with Dylan Mulvaney, right? You're creating a marketing strategy for 0.01% of the

00:43:04.260 population when most of your drinkers of Budweiser don't really care about this issue of transgender

00:43:10.580 thing one way or the other. It's not that they're transphobic. It's just not on their radar. So what

00:43:16.040 explains the disconnect between the fact that most athletes, I'm almost willing to bet, are not as

00:43:22.960 woke as we'd like to think. Most of the fans are not very woke. And yet the suits are the ones who

00:43:30.720 are pushing the wokeness. Is there some way to, you know, build a bridge for that incongruity? 0.89

00:43:39.440 I don't know, because the thing is, I think a lot of the people at the top making those decisions

00:43:43.960 actually aren't as woke as they're led to believe. But there's societal pressures. Listen, I have been

00:43:53.340 blown away, and I witnessed it for 16 years where I last worked. And I think that's probably the best

00:43:58.800 focus, because before that, the word woke really didn't exist, I feel like, until maybe 8, 10 years

00:44:04.600 ago. But I feel like these companies are making massive decisions based on what happens on Twitter

00:44:14.560 or X and social media in general. And I've seen it, and I have experienced it. And then they're very

00:44:20.520 reactive, right? And oh, gosh, if we don't do this, and we won't look like we're accepting or tolerant,

00:44:24.580 and let's add another color to the rainbow and another letter and a plus sign and whatever else.

00:44:27.960 And I think at the end of the day, listen, there's always going to be extremes. And people,

00:44:32.400 you know, even sadly, when you say, let's end racism, guess what? That's never going to happen,

00:44:38.400 because they're human beings. And it's just not going to happen. Can we address it more?

00:44:45.400 Absolutely. Should all of us be playing our part? Heck yeah. And holding others accountable and

00:44:49.680 companies accountable, yes. But to go to this extreme, I don't understand. I also think it's just

00:44:54.880 stupid, based on business models. At the end of the day, Michael Jordan said it perfectly back in 1.00

00:45:01.940 the 1980s. Republicans have running shoes or whatever the expression is. Republicans buy

00:45:06.540 sneakers. That's it. And it's so simple. And it doesn't actually matter if it's Republican or

00:45:11.380 Democrat. That was the example that he gave when he was getting criticized for, well, you're not

00:45:14.740 saying enough. Tiger Woods was criticized for not, you know, being woken up in many ways, even though

00:45:19.360 I don't think that phrase was used at the time. At the end of the day, I think if you are any

00:45:24.180 television network, you want everybody watching your shows, don't you? You don't want just one side

00:45:30.000 or the other, whether it's Budweiser, whether it's a type of clothing brand, no matter what it is,

00:45:36.900 I want everyone to absorb, to buy my product because I make more money that way, don't I?

00:45:43.180 So why do you choose anything? Choose a side. And sadly, what I think it does, and it's just

00:45:51.160 marketing and sales, but what it actually does is it divides further. And that's what breaks my heart

00:45:57.220 because you can see it and you can feel it. And you felt it a lot the last three years in particular.

00:46:01.840 I think the combination of COVID and the lockdowns and just the fallout from it, as well as what

00:46:08.900 happened with George Floyd and then defunding the police and all of these things, I think that's

00:46:13.480 where my heartbreak lies the most based on my upbringing, where it really wasn't a color thing.

00:46:19.520 It was just accepting everybody. We all knew that, hey, I'm the new kid this year. Next year,

00:46:24.940 it's that kid. And you just start, it was a beautifully diverse upbringing. That's all I knew.

00:46:30.720 But now what this has done, it is divided more. The conversations I have with my kids, and I have

00:46:36.540 a 21-year-old, a 19-year-old, two in college at High Point University, which, by the way,

00:46:41.640 amazing as far as really accepting kids and their diverse opinions and allowing conversation.

00:46:47.060 I can't even tell you. I'm so grateful for that place. So two there, and then a third is a senior

00:46:51.240 in high school here. And the conversations that they have in classes, it's really fascinating what

00:46:58.900 is being taught. And I just keep saying to them, listen, if you stay silent, going back to our prior

00:47:05.240 topic, if you stay silent about that, then that's on you. But if you do it in a kind way,

00:47:10.800 like let's encourage the discussion. And teachers, that's your job. You owe that without giving your

00:47:17.960 opinion on some of these controversial topics. But to me, it's just overall, whether you look at the

00:47:21.820 university level, or there's certain places I would not allow my children to go because of that.

00:47:27.280 And that's business related as well, right? So why choose? Why divide? What it ends up doing

00:47:33.940 is completely what they're preaching against. I don't know the why. I wish I were smart enough to

00:47:40.800 have that answer. But I do know that if it continues down this path, it's just going to continue to get

00:47:47.460 worse. And my parents, who've been married for 52 years as an interracial couple, getting married off 0.92

00:47:53.160 of the civil rights era, where it was a brutal decision. My mom's family disowned her because she 1.00

00:47:57.920 was marrying a Black man. For their perspective, for them to say, my goodness, we haven't felt this

00:48:03.220 in any aspect of our lives since then, that says something. We are in a deep hole here. And I think

00:48:10.460 if we don't face it and have these conversations, thanks to you, then it's just going to get worse.

00:48:16.140 And I'm just not going to be silent about it anymore, though, because I feel like I'm complicit if I

00:48:19.660 don't talk about it. Beautifully said. Last question. And I know that it deserves a lot

00:48:24.080 more time than what we have. But notwithstanding some of the personal tribulations that you face,

00:48:29.980 you know, you mentioned earlier that you got divorced. That has to be painful. I know that

00:48:34.580 your father has been ill. That's a very difficult situation to go through. You went through your

00:48:39.100 trials and tribulations with ESPN. Yet from the little that I know of you so far,

00:48:43.640 you have this radiant positive aura, you have this smile. So what is the secret to happiness? And

00:48:52.400 the guy who's asking it is the one who wrote the book with the subtitle. So teach me guru,

00:48:59.560 how is it? First of all, can you please send me a book? I'll pay for it. Will you autograph it for me?

00:49:06.160 I will. It's done. That I just love it. And I think not having read your book yet,

00:49:14.180 but knowing the premise of it, it is a choice. Now, that doesn't mean that we can't have bad days

00:49:19.940 and down times and be sad because I have been so sad and heartbroken and devastated over the last,

00:49:30.400 I'd say four years with work and with personal life and tough decisions. Right. And watching my

00:49:38.860 father's battle with two cancers and just so much, right. Things are a lot bigger than what I've been

00:49:43.220 through with my little work thing. But first and foremost, my faith has never been stronger.

00:49:50.700 And I was raised Catholic and, you know, you go through what you're supposed to go through and

00:49:56.400 you go to mass every Sunday and you sit and you stand and you kneel and you say the, our father,

00:49:59.520 and then you go on and you come back next week. And now it's just a lot bigger than that because at

00:50:03.620 the times when I've been absolutely broken and scared and feeling like, um, not only was I hated

00:50:10.040 by the world, God was mad at me too for personal decisions with, you know, the marriage. And I just,

00:50:17.460 I asked for help and I got that. This is a story for another day. It's really deep. Um, but I got

00:50:24.180 some very clear answers, um, from God that I think I probably was receiving before, but was maybe not

00:50:30.960 willing to open my eyes enough to see. So for me, it is very much faith-based. And secondly, I just

00:50:36.020 live in gratitude, um, which is related to the faith, I think, but it's more so based on how my

00:50:41.020 parents raised me, um, raised the three of us. And, uh, I am just so blessed and so fortunate in so many

00:50:47.760 ways. How many kids, um, you know, we ask kids all the time and kindergarten and on up, what do you

00:50:54.680 want to be when you grow up? I mean, I got asked that question and you know, the answer from when

00:50:59.200 I was 11 years old and I got to do it. No one gave it to me. I worked my ass off for it. By the way,

00:51:05.320 I have a sign over there that says I love Jesus, but I cuss a little. So forgive me. That's my favorite

00:51:10.300 sign right now. I keep trying to be better. Sorry, mom. Um, but I worked my butt off for this. No one gave

00:51:16.260 me anything. Um, and during that time, like I did it. I fought through those fears with the help of a

00:51:23.540 lot of other people, right. As well. It certainly is a village, but I got to live this dream at the

00:51:30.160 highest level. Um, and so it was, yes, I was beaten up along the way, but there's so much more good than

00:51:36.580 bad. The people in my life because of it are incredible. So I just feel like, um, I do feel like

00:51:43.880 happiness is a choice. Um, and you can choose to focus on the good or the bad. You don't ignore the

00:51:49.780 bad. Um, because I think that makes you more grateful for the good, but you know, it's funny

00:51:55.420 with all of this blowing up. I mean, I'd never, I'd never, uh, talked to an attorney really in my life

00:52:01.500 about anything until I decided to stand up for myself with, with my employer. Um, so when I say

00:52:09.640 scared to death, you have no idea, especially as the sole provider, a hundred percent for my entire

00:52:16.440 family. Wow. Well, you're going to have next year, I'm gonna have three kids in college at once,

00:52:20.860 right? But it's, and I'm sorry, it's such an emotional topic. And I'm so glad that you can feel,

00:52:27.560 um, my happiness because I am, even though I literally don't know what tomorrow holds.

00:52:33.200 I don't know what is next career wise. I know what I want. Um, but I'm, I have parents who love

00:52:40.340 me. I have a very small, tight, incredible circle of friends. That circle has gotten smaller and

00:52:47.000 smaller lately for sure, which was a tough process, but a much needed one. Um, I have my faith in God

00:52:54.300 and others and humanity in general. I think there's so much more good in the world than we hear about

00:53:00.240 these days. And that's kind of my mission is to point that out with this little platform I might

00:53:04.860 have for who knows how long, and then to live it and not be hypocritical. So, um, I'm by the last

00:53:09.640 thing, again, I have three babies. They're not babies, right? But I have three kiddos who are watching

00:53:14.880 the way that I handle things. And trust me, they see me melt down. They see me, you know, not be the

00:53:21.000 best mom at times. Um, not have the most patients, um, not say the right thing, be a hothead at times for

00:53:28.960 sure, but they know where my heart is. Um, and I just, I hope that others can try to remember that

00:53:34.940 when dealing with people, whether it's like this on social media or at the grocery store, you know,

00:53:39.920 everybody's dealing with something. And if we lead with kindness, uh, maybe more people can feel

00:53:43.840 happy. I just feel fortunate. Well, if I can end it on the following note, you exude grace, kindness,

00:53:51.120 positivity, you're all around lovely. And it's been such a delight talking to you. Please stay on the line

00:53:56.340 so we could say goodbye offline, uh, officially, but please come back anytime. Best of luck. I wish

00:54:01.900 I, you got me all choked up talking about such happy things. Honestly, I say to my kids since

00:54:06.460 they were little, I'm like, no, I cry happy tears because I do. So this is, this is my once a day

00:54:10.680 happy tears. So can you feel my virtual hug? I do this in person next time. I can't wait. I can't

00:54:16.380 wait to meet you in person. You, you truly are delightful. Thank you so much for being on. Thank you for

00:54:20.340 having me. Cheers. Go crying.

My Chat with Sage Steele, Former ESPN Anchor (The Saad Truth with Dr. Saad_585)

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