Who are we to judge? Lily Phillips, the British entertainer who slept with over 100 men, is one of the most famous entertainers of all time, but do we really have the right to judge her? Or do we have a moral obligation to do so?
00:00:00.000So today I want to talk about the story that many of you have probably heard of, this British woman, her name is Lily Phillips.
00:00:11.720She is a only fans, you know, performer, I don't know what, what's how you would call her performer or talent or entertainer who famously just slept as part of some documentary with 100 guys.
00:00:31.680And apparently this was a training for eventually sleeping with 1000 guys.
00:01:30.720And so there is a passage in the parasitic mind, for those of you who have read it, and if you haven't read it, I urge you to do so.
00:01:41.180So on page 175, where I'm talking about a call to action, the idea being that in the parasitic mind, I was saying that a lot of times what stops people from, you know, fighting back against parasitic ideas is that they're afraid to judge.
00:01:57.560And so very much here you'll see a lot of people who, instead of judging what Lily Phillips has done or what the hundred men who decided to partake in this, I mean, I guess literally an orgy, we shouldn't judge them.
00:02:14.600You know, sex positivity, who are we to judge, right?
00:02:17.680And so let me read for you what I said about this in, as I said, on page 175 of the parasitic mind.
00:02:28.340So I'll read it and then I'll say a few other things.
00:02:32.280In a similar way, many well-intentioned individuals are too afraid to judge others.
00:02:37.540The Cambridge Dictionary lists the following synonyms and related words for non-judgmental, open-minded, enlightened, free-thinking, inclusive, liberal, live-and-let-live, an idiom, permissive, society, and tolerant, right?
00:03:08.760The West is founded on a bedrock of Judeo-Christian traditions, and many assume, as per Christian theology, that judging others can be a sin.
00:03:17.680Several Gospels contain edicts against judging others.
00:03:21.600In the Pericope Adalture, John 7.53 and 8.11, Jesus says,
00:03:30.140Let any one of you who is without sin be the first to throw a stone at her, in reference to the imminent stoning of a woman who has committed adultery.
00:10:17.000I don't know if you've seen the studies where they use, you know, the blue light or whichever light spectrum allows you to see what's there.
00:11:28.180And let me now talk a bit about a very important psychometric scale or construct that refers to immediate versus delayed gratification, right?
00:11:40.640And by the way, I'm thinking at some point of doing an entire show just on this important Q, not Q, concept.
00:11:50.200So immediate gratification would be, I want it now, delayed gratification, I'm willing to wait for later.
00:11:56.340And it turns out, of course, that that is incredibly predictive of the likelihood of you being able to succeed in life, right?
00:12:04.300So if I decide to hold off making any income because there's a long educational trajectory that I must go through if I want to become a professor, yes, I can see all of my friends in high school and in university making money now, a lot more money than I'm making while I'm still a graduate student.
00:12:24.180I'm, you know, I'm living in, you know, quite poor, but then I will quickly catch up to you eventually, and maybe eventually I will probably surpass you.
00:12:36.220And so this ability to modulate your immediate rewards to future delayed gratification predicts many, many phenomena, certainly in consumer behavior and economic decision-making and so on.
00:13:01.580My immediate rewards of fame, of money, apparently, I don't know how much she makes, but apparently if you go on her OnlyFans, you know, she makes some obscene amount of money, which, you know, you might say, my God, I write books and I teach students and I supervise graduate students.
00:13:19.080And I serve on review boards of peer-reviewed journals and I apply for grants and I give lectures and, you know, all these things.
00:13:27.940And she probably makes more in a month than I do in a year.
00:13:35.680And so it's much easier to sell sex than it is to sell, you know, intellectual pursuits.
00:13:41.600But what she said basically is, today, while I'm pretty and sexy and a lot of men want to have sex with me, I don't want to think about the future.
00:13:52.620I want to pursue the immediate gratification of fame and of money.
00:13:59.340And actually, at one point, she goes, well, I'm sure that hopefully some guy will, in the future, want to marry me.
00:14:07.180Well, you might want to revisit what kind of guys are likely to marry you in the future.
00:14:12.540And, by the way, no, it's not the patriarchy that's causing your future male prospective suitors to say, you know what, I'd rather not be married to a woman who's going to be the mother of my children who got gangbanged by 47,000 men.
00:14:33.740Maybe that's not what I'm looking for.
00:14:35.500But, I promise you that I would read you a passage about militant feminism.
00:14:42.100This is on page 32 of The Sad Truth About Happiness.
00:14:47.140Why is it that Lily Phillips felt so empowered by the idea of, you know what, men can do it, women can too.
00:15:00.420So let me read for you here, page 32 from The Sad Truth About Happiness.
00:15:05.500Militant feminism, which, like socialism and communism, is something that I would call an idea pathogen, a bad idea that gets transmitted virally, largely by universities, is an ideology that has imparted immeasurable misery on millions of women.
00:15:23.200Because it denies human nature and the reality of sexual differences.
00:15:28.300That men and women should be treated equally under the law, equity feminism, is a veridical position.
00:15:34.180But militant feminism has pursued the idea of sexual equality to the point of lunacy, arguing that any differences in behaviors between the sexes are manifestations of an evil patriarchy that must be eradicated.
00:15:50.240Take, for example, the old alleged double standard regarding human sexuality, namely that promiscuous men are admired, whereas promiscuous women are reviled.
00:16:01.340According to feminist ideology, this is a means by which the patriarchy keeps women in check.
00:16:10.420Burn your bras, engage in meaningless one-night stands, and refrain from having children.
00:16:15.940Hey, ladies, you are no different from men, and if they are promiscuous, you should be too.
00:16:21.760Millions of women answered that call, and yet the longitudinal data tracking women's happiness levels have shown that the trends are going in the wrong direction.
00:16:32.040Specifically, over a 35-year period, women's levels of subjective well-being in the United States have declined, both in an absolute sense as well as relative to men.
00:16:45.720This is perhaps not too difficult to explain.
00:16:48.920Convincing women about the virtues of one-night stands is certain to make men happier than women, at least in the short term.
00:16:58.980Unencumbered sex is seldom a path to happiness for women.
00:17:03.380It is marriage, which relies on commitment and trust, not promiscuity, that is positively correlated with happiness.
00:17:10.960This does not imply that women do not at times enjoy the pursuit of unencumbered sexual variety, but they certainly do not do so to the same extent as men.
00:17:23.340To recognize this obvious evolutionary fact does not make one a patriarchal misogynist, but someone rooted in reality.
00:17:31.560It is incontestable that many postulates of militant feminism have been detrimental to women's senses of happiness and well-being.
00:17:41.820The part where I read you that women are not as interested in unencumbered sex stems from a study by David Schmidt, the evolutionary psychologist, who is a former doctoral student of David Buss, who is a good friend of mine, one of the pioneers of evolutionary psychology.
00:17:59.240He did a study on 48 countries where he administered the SOI.
00:18:05.380The SOI is a psychometric scale called the SOI, the acronym is Sociosexual Orientation Inventory, meaning some people score highly on their desire for unencumbered sex.
00:18:19.980Some score lower, so there are individual differences within a sex, but what we know is that men score much higher than women on their desire for unencumbered sex as captured by the SOI scale.
00:18:34.120And in every single one of the 48 countries that were studied, that statement held true.
00:18:41.120It's a human universal because it is etched, it is inscribed within our biology.
00:18:46.720So, when this woman, this poor, I'm going to call it degenerate, because yes, I'm going to pass judgment.
00:18:56.780When this degenerate decides to have sex with a hundred men in preparation of having sex with a thousand men, she is certainly not pursuing her best pathway to happiness and well-being, as is exactly captured by the raw honesty of the documentary that captured how she looked.
00:19:20.980She looked like a broken human being, right?
00:19:24.200I mean, you could see it, and actually, frankly, I felt very bad for her.
00:19:29.120Now, just to add a measure of degeneracy, apparently her parents are well aware of this, and, you know, they support it.
00:20:48.060It could come in the form of polygyny, which is one man, multiple women, or in the form of polyandry, which is one woman, multiple men.
00:20:59.380Now, a study, a historical study of cultures has found that about 85% of documented cultures have allowed for the expression of polygyny in that society.
00:21:15.620So, meaning that, you know, for example, in Islam, you could have one man with four women.
00:21:20.900And Mormonism can have also multiple wives, right, sister wives.
00:21:25.380So, many cultures, the great majority of cultures throughout history, have allowed some affordance to polygyny.
00:21:33.800The rest of the cultures have institutionalized monogamy.
00:21:39.260And an extraordinarily small number of societies, the most famous of which is called fraternal Tibetan polyandry,
00:21:49.620is where you allow for one woman to be shared by multiple men, but it's called fraternal because the men who share that woman are brothers.
00:22:02.580Meaning that if I can't be assured that the kid is mine, at least let it be from one of my brothers with whom I share, on average, half my genes.
00:22:15.320Because in pornography aimed at heterosexual men, you end up finding, actually, a greater depiction of polyandrous sexual encounters more than you do polygynous encounters.
00:22:34.060Meaning you would think that much of porn is going to show one guy with a harem of women.
00:22:55.560But it's something that I discuss in several of my works.
00:22:59.080You can go back to my book, my 2011 book, The Consuming Instincts, what Juicy Burgers' pornography, Ferraris, and gift-giving reveal about human nature.
00:23:09.040There I discuss some very, very interesting studies that have explored these kinds of issues.
00:23:30.480Because even within the context of polyandrous pornographic depictions, it is well beyond the measure of what could be conceived as within the normal range for a woman to be sleeping with 100 men.
00:23:51.900You don't have to be puritanical or a moral puritan to understand that.
00:23:59.560There is an intimacy in any sexual act.
00:24:03.800And you don't have to say, you know, I'm unbelievably morally restrained to actually buy that.
00:24:12.820When you give up your body to 100 men, no good outcome can come of this.
00:24:19.820Now, she's already feeling how bad her choices were, as we saw, and how broken she was.
00:24:27.240But if she didn't feel it then, I can assure you that in 5 years or 10 years, she will deeply regret her actions.
00:24:35.580I can assure you that you can put all your money on that fact because it is inconceivable that she can have one day a child where that child walks around in the world and someone finds out that,
00:24:52.620oh, your mommy is Lily Phillips, the one who was sloshed by 47,000 men.
00:25:01.420So imagine how selfish you must be that you don't even have the calculus to say, wait a second, the action that I take will have an impact beyond the current immediate time window.
00:25:16.060How about when I have children in the future?
00:25:19.000Do you think my current actions might harm them?
00:25:22.240Lily Phillips doesn't think about that.
00:25:24.260That's why she's a degenerate pig, as are every single one of those men that said, sign me up for that.