This Past Weekend with Theo Von - Cinnamon Wilson ｜ This Past Weekend #147

00:00:00.000 Today's episode is brought to you by Gray Block Pizza.

00:00:02.740 Gray Block Pizza, 1811 Pico Boulevard in Los Angeles.

00:00:06.480 And they got all type of stuff.

00:00:11.240 Calzans, salads, salads, gourmet pizzas.

00:00:18.220 Gray Block Pizza, 1811 Pico Boulevard on the way to the beach.

00:00:21.160 Gray Block, get that eater. 0.99

00:00:23.200 Happy November.

00:00:24.480 Happy November to you and wherever you are.

00:00:27.960 And I'm so grateful you're here.

00:00:30.000 I'm here, we out here.

00:00:32.340 You know, we're in this little, this little dirty daddy royal rumble. 0.96

00:00:37.360 We're out here tickling each other's tummies. 0.94

00:00:40.360 You feel me?

00:00:42.180 We're out here just being, you know, we a couple of, you know, we a couple of the, of the, of the, of the most wildest little clams in the chowder.

00:00:55.100 You feel me?

00:00:56.440 Take care, brush your hair.

00:00:58.060 Let's get into it.

00:01:00.300 Ooh, I'm just sitting on your front porch wondering how could I be so far from my home.

00:01:23.980 Mmm, mmm, mmm.

00:01:26.740 And my mind is somewhere else.

00:01:29.460 But when I find it, I'll patch up where it's been blown.

00:01:34.900 There you go.

00:01:35.640 Get your mind.

00:01:36.680 Get your mind.

00:01:38.280 Now I'm just floating on the breeze.

00:01:41.040 And I feel I'm falling like these leaves.

00:01:43.980 I must be cornerstone.

00:01:46.920 Come on.

00:01:48.140 We're here.

00:01:49.120 We can do it.

00:01:49.900 Oh, but when I reach that ground, I'll share this peace of mind.

00:01:54.060 I found I can feel it in my bones.

00:01:58.580 Come on.

00:01:59.340 But it's gonna take a little time.

00:02:03.840 For me to set that parking brake and let myself on my arm shine that light on me.

00:02:14.400 That is Bishop Gunn with Shine.

00:02:42.260 And that's that lead in, the music right there.

00:02:46.580 Welcome to this past weekend.

00:02:49.620 Where are you at right now?

00:02:51.920 What are you doing?

00:02:52.700 What are you wearing?

00:02:54.500 Dude, are you wearing a shirt that you like, I hope?

00:02:58.020 That's one thing sometimes for me.

00:03:00.080 Dude, if I leave the house in a shirt that I don't like, I'm not gonna be, you know, real tickled about that.

00:03:08.440 But if you see me somewhere and I look grumpy, then I probably have on a shirt that I don't like.

00:03:15.700 You know, my mom's, you know, one time when I was growing up, my mom got a batch of real small shirts.

00:03:21.960 And I don't know where she got them from.

00:03:24.740 I don't know if, you know, somebody was selling, you know, boxes of really small shirts or whatever and she got a deal on that.

00:03:32.660 Because she used to spend time, some time with some, you know, miscellaneous gentlemen here and there who was getting deals on stuff.

00:03:40.960 You know, she dated a black Jewish guy when I was young. 0.96

00:03:43.780 So, you know, she'd show up at the house with a box of, you know, you know, a box of, you know, one size fits all neck braces and shit like that every now and then. 0.95

00:03:54.180 And we would play in the house, you know, play, you know, we'd play handicap at the house and, you know, put on different neck braces and, you know, wheel each other around and do courthouse and all of that.

00:04:06.460 And, you know, just being children, you know, being young children and, and one time my mom got these shirts and, and I think probably for a year and a half, they had four different colors in the box.

00:04:19.520 They had orange, they had blue, like, like a blue you never even seen anymore.

00:04:26.160 Like, you know, they used to have a lot more different blues, you know, a long time ago they had a lot more.

00:04:32.580 Now they have maybe seven different blues, you know, royal blue, I think midnight blue, you know, you know, British blue.

00:04:47.480 They got that, you know, the British always want to do their thing. 0.98

00:04:50.880 French blue, that blue that kind of, you know, it says it's going to be there for you and then it's not there for you.

00:04:56.980 It never helps you out or shows up.

00:04:59.060 And they got like three other blues.

00:05:00.560 But this was a blue that they don't have anymore.

00:05:02.860 This was kind of, it was like powder blue kind of, but, but a little, like if somebody saw you in it, they couldn't tell if maybe you worked at the hospital or if you were like a newborn baby.

00:05:16.280 It was kind of one of those things.

00:05:17.940 So I guess it was like a medical blue.

00:05:20.480 You know, it kind of seemed like a blue, maybe you'd only put like a newborn baby in, like a baby, you know, a baby blue for a boy if somebody gave birth to a boy.

00:05:29.040 Or it would be, you know, like the scrub, something like that.

00:05:33.760 So we had that, they had orange, blue, they had pink, like not pink, but like purple and green, like a dark green.

00:05:43.460 I think they were black, but it said dark green on them.

00:05:46.000 So that's one of the problems sometimes with dark green.

00:05:49.200 Somebody's like, oh, these are, you know, you'll buy six or seven hundred dark green shirts, but really they're just black shirts.

00:05:55.800 And now you're wearing black shirts and you're thinking, you know, that your eyes don't work good. 0.99

00:06:00.320 And that shit always, that's, I don't like it when, you know, companies do that to you. 0.99

00:06:05.520 When they say, oh, you know, you got this box of dark green hitters right here and really they're just black hitters. 1.00

00:06:12.680 And you're walking around in a black shirt and telling people it's dark green. 0.70

00:06:17.600 And all your friends think you're crazy and you don't know any better because you can't, you think your eyes are bad because somebody lied to you.

00:06:25.300 One of these fancy companies lied to you, but yeah, my mom got some bad shirts, some small shirts. 0.99

00:06:31.100 And so for, I remember for a while growing up wearing those real, real small, small shirts.

00:06:37.420 And I think, you know, I know, you know, anxiety is something different for everybody, but sometimes I think when I was young, that's one of the things that gave me anxiety was wearing.

00:06:48.040 I mean, these were t-shirts that were for really almost just real athletic babies.

00:06:53.980 If they had a baby that could, you know, that was, you know, that was going to wear a lot of different shirts, then those would have been for him.

00:07:03.260 Because my mom got about a box of bad shirts. 0.99

00:07:06.020 But anyhow, man, I hope that this November is fitting you comfortably.

00:07:14.680 Because we're getting into a nice time of year.

00:07:17.120 You know, I remember when I was young being, you know, November, you get outside and you could feel, you know, just feeling the cool air on your cheeks.

00:07:28.720 And it felt like a, just like a man, like a, not a man, I guess like, yeah, like a man with like a cold tongue was just kind of licking your cheeks a little bit.

00:07:37.940 And that's Mr. Winter.

00:07:39.960 You know, that's Father Winter or whatever they call him.

00:07:42.840 You know, Chris, not Chris Kringle, but, you know, that's wintertime.

00:07:47.580 And wintertime would come along and it would just, you know, it was fun around those times.

00:07:53.320 And we had a turtleneck at our house, too.

00:07:55.660 My mom had a turtleneck she wore for business meetings or something. 1.00

00:07:59.740 And sometimes we would get a hold of that bitch, boy. 1.00

00:08:03.520 And when I was young, there was nothing more fun than wearing mom's turtleneck. 0.99

00:08:07.440 Because you didn't have a shirt like that.

00:08:09.720 You know, when you're a kid, that turtleneck, that's like a third sleeve.

00:08:13.180 You could do whatever you want.

00:08:14.340 You could put your arm out the top, put your neck out the side, and then your other arm out the other one.

00:08:20.600 You could do whatever you want. 1.00

00:08:22.580 You know, you got that bitch, you know, you got the arm coming out the right hole. 1.00

00:08:27.620 You got the, you know, other arm coming out the left hole. 1.00

00:08:30.820 And then you got your other arm going out the turtle hole. 1.00

00:08:34.560 So you wearing that bitch, you look like a crossing guard, that fucking, you know, that's in really some developmental type of clothing. 1.00

00:08:43.180 And I loved that, man. 1.00

00:08:45.200 When my mom, you know, because I would do the laundry.

00:08:48.280 We had different chores when I was growing up to do the laundry.

00:08:52.260 And that was one of mine.

00:08:54.340 You know, my mom made us do that when we were real, real young.

00:08:57.040 And we had to do it.

00:08:58.060 You know, we had to help out.

00:08:59.520 You know, do the bathroom, clean the bathroom. 1.00

00:09:02.460 You know, everybody had different chores.

00:09:05.120 And I remember sometimes with the laundry, I would do mom's laundry. 0.99

00:09:12.900 And I would get the, and I'd get that turtleneck, boy, and I'd put that bitch on. 1.00

00:09:18.880 Man, you could do all kinds of, it was just more of an adventurous shirt than other regular shirts. 0.91

00:09:23.860 I remember a turtleneck was really, you know, it was like kind of, it was like the choose your own adventure of shirts.

00:09:34.320 Because a turtleneck, you could pop out of different, you know, you could pop out the top.

00:09:39.580 You could pop out of a sleeve.

00:09:42.000 You know, you could do whatever you wanted. 1.00

00:09:43.160 And I grew up in a neighborhood where a lot of people look like shit. 1.00

00:09:47.280 So it's like if we wore stuff that was not really, like if you showed up, dude, on our, if you got off of our school bus at the school and you look like shit. 1.00

00:09:58.520 Dude, you fit right in, bro. 0.99

00:10:00.220 Because our bus, it brought in everybody.

00:10:02.980 You know, out from my street, man, off of McGee Street, bro, it brought in all the wild cats.

00:10:09.360 You know, head lice, boy.

00:10:10.720 We had that head lice, we showed up with the head lice. 0.80

00:10:16.120 People want to start bitching, then everybody going to start itching. 1.00

00:10:21.660 Because we had that, I mean, they had head lice in our neighborhood. 0.99

00:10:25.160 There was, it was, you could turf wars, bro.

00:10:29.080 You'd feel, sometimes you'd get two strands of head lice in your hair at night and you couldn't sleep. 0.99

00:10:33.400 Them bitches was battling it out. 1.00

00:10:35.980 You know, it was like S.E. Hinton. 0.99

00:10:37.460 It was like, you know, one of these, step it up, like that movie, Step It Up, where everybody's trying to outdance each other.

00:10:47.180 And that was the kind of thing you could feel on your scalp.

00:10:51.020 If you got, you know, a couple different strands of head lice at the same time.

00:10:55.680 And we called them Italians, head lice, because they showed up in groups and they bothered you. 1.00

00:11:02.380 But I love this time of year, man.

00:11:04.360 And I hope you love it.

00:11:05.800 And I'm happy to be here with you guys.

00:11:07.520 I'm a little tired, but, you know, I'm always a little tired these days.

00:11:11.180 And that's just been life.

00:11:12.580 And that's okay.

00:11:13.180 I think I'm, I don't know if I'm tired, but I'm also kind of gratefully, you know, restful in some ways.

00:11:23.000 I'm just, you know, I guess I'm a little bit gratefully exhausted maybe in certain ways.

00:11:31.300 Man, I got back from Utah.

00:11:33.620 I got back from Utah.

00:11:34.820 Utah, and I want to apologize.

00:11:37.560 I didn't do the meet and greet last night after the Saturday shows.

00:11:42.040 Nobody cared, really, I don't think.

00:11:43.740 I mean, some people might have cared.

00:11:46.220 I was just trying to, I was, you know, I've just been, I've been, you know, I've been having a lot of, like, just anxiety and anxious energy.

00:11:55.060 And it's been hard for me to, you know, when I get back to do the podcast, sometimes it's tough.

00:12:01.040 You know, because I just feel, you know, just a lot of stress, I think.

00:12:06.640 And I don't know what some of the stress comes from, I guess.

00:12:09.160 Honestly, you know, sometimes I feel, you know, I feel like just more responsibility.

00:12:17.320 I don't know.

00:12:18.500 I mean, look, it's different when people start coming to see the show and people are excited and, you know, it's just a new thing.

00:12:26.160 You know, it's a new thing in my life.

00:12:27.980 And I've talked about this a little bit before, and I was thinking about it today.

00:12:33.540 You know, but I'm used to, I'm used to being that, having that underdog kind of thing.

00:12:39.420 You know, I'm used to feeling like an underdog where, you know, feeling like nobody cares.

00:12:44.580 And so, you know, that's a comfortable place for me to be at.

00:12:49.400 Because it always gives me, like, a place to come from.

00:12:52.780 You know, my whole life, I've always felt like I came from a place where I felt like nobody cared.

00:12:59.520 And some of that might have been true.

00:13:02.160 And some of that was that something was off with me where I couldn't feel.

00:13:07.080 I couldn't feel when somebody did care.

00:13:10.760 But now it's like people are coming out and they're supportive of the work.

00:13:15.940 Look, and I'm doing good work, man.

00:13:17.560 Look, I'll show up, I'll put on a good show.

00:13:20.460 I promise you.

00:13:22.200 You know, there's a lot of things in my life I've done poorly.

00:13:25.240 But show up and, you know, and share, you know, share these stories and make people laugh and feel good and have fun.

00:13:36.840 I'm doing that.

00:13:37.680 I am doing that.

00:13:38.760 And I'm not going to let you down in that department.

00:13:44.200 But it's just been different when people come out and it's just kind of scary.

00:13:49.700 Like, when I've always felt like the underdog, when I've always felt like nobody cared.

00:13:53.580 And to now be in a place where it feels like people do care.

00:13:57.160 You know, it takes some, I don't know.

00:14:00.360 It's like, let me think if I can explain this better.

00:14:04.340 It makes me just wonder, well, who, if I'm not the underdog, you know, or how does this fit on me?

00:14:10.740 You know, I don't know how to be kind of in that way in a little bit.

00:14:15.740 You know, I don't know how to be like, I don't, I don't know.

00:14:25.460 My mind wants to say like, or my heart wants to say like grateful.

00:14:28.440 Like, I don't know how to be, I mean, I know, I know, I am grateful.

00:14:35.640 I just don't know how like, I guess I feel like no matter how much I say thank you to people,

00:14:44.660 that they're not going to believe me.

00:14:51.540 You know, like, I don't know, something, maybe people, no matter how much I say thank you,

00:14:56.040 people aren't going to believe me, like, like people would never like believe that I'm grateful

00:15:00.900 or something.

00:15:02.900 I don't know.

00:15:03.500 I'm trying to figure some of that out.

00:15:04.940 You know, I'm trying to talk and feel at the same time.

00:15:09.280 But, but I had a great time and, you know, you know, people came out and it was, it was nice.

00:15:14.040 You know, some husbands and wives, a whole family came out.

00:15:16.920 And this family, I tell you this, this family, they must have been probably about nine feet tall

00:15:23.720 or seven to nine feet.

00:15:26.500 And they came out and, man, they were all laughing and the dad was out there, you know,

00:15:32.000 when he had something on his cheek, like a little bit of mustard or something,

00:15:34.840 because they'd been eating.

00:15:36.460 You know, families like to eat together.

00:15:38.800 And they had fun, man. 0.99

00:15:40.240 I almost, I almost wiped that mustard off his cheek and put it in my own freaking face hole. 1.00

00:15:44.300 I almost put it right in my own condiment hole right there and ate that little dab right 0.95

00:15:49.380 off of that daddy's, you know, right off that daddy's cheeky, cheeky.

00:15:55.280 You know, I was just feeling the love.

00:15:56.880 I was feeling caught up in it.

00:15:58.840 And we had, man, it was just all the shows were sold out and people came out and, and

00:16:03.220 it was, it was great.

00:16:04.180 It was a great time.

00:16:04.820 Somebody gave me a nice gift.

00:16:06.000 It's behind me.

00:16:07.000 It says onward on it.

00:16:09.600 And it's got a V at the front.

00:16:11.620 And he made this himself.

00:16:13.140 Um, and this is Rawlings, is this man's Rawlings Sporting Woods.

00:16:19.420 And this man named Lance Rawlings.

00:16:23.920 And it's, um, you can look him up, RawlingsSportingWoods.com.

00:16:29.360 And he makes these really cool wooden pieces.

00:16:33.040 And, uh, somebody else brought me out there, WWF title belt.

00:16:35.840 I don't know, you know, this guy was holding it up the whole show.

00:16:39.260 He was keyed up and he was fired up and he, I mean, it was, it was awesome.

00:16:44.120 And so he gave me that strap.

00:16:45.460 So now this man gave me a strap.

00:16:47.560 So I got, I got two straps here.

00:16:49.820 I got my own fighter and the kid belt.

00:16:51.320 And I have this one that this man gave me.

00:16:54.480 Uh, what else?

00:16:55.380 Oh, I went to the Mormon, went and checked out the Mormon Tabernacle and looked around

00:16:59.700 there.

00:17:00.100 Beautiful campus.

00:17:00.900 If you, if you get to go to Salt Lake City, you know, one of the special things they have

00:17:04.820 there was, um, is Mormons.

00:17:07.640 And Mormons, they are, you know, they're gentle people.

00:17:13.120 I mean, Mormons are gentle.

00:17:14.380 Have you ever seen a sheep?

00:17:15.460 You ever seen a sheep when it's being real, real nice?

00:17:18.680 You ever seen a sheep and it's being just super nice? 0.99

00:17:21.260 Like you see a sheep and you're like, damn, that sheep is being fucking nice. 1.00

00:17:27.440 That's Mormons. 1.00

00:17:29.080 They're friendly, man.

00:17:30.440 You can marry anybody.

00:17:31.840 You know, we're walking through the scenery there through the campus down there and, uh,

00:17:36.480 on Temple Avenue and in Salt, downtown Salt Lake City.

00:17:40.340 And they, they got weddings going on everywhere.

00:17:43.440 They had 11 weddings going on.

00:17:45.640 Dude, you could pick somebody up and pick a rose off a thing and tickle a preacher for

00:17:50.300 two seconds.

00:17:51.040 The next thing you know, you're hitched whoever you're holding on to.

00:17:54.300 Yeah.

00:17:54.560 I mean, everywhere you turned around, it was, there was just, you were like,

00:17:58.460 you were in a wedding, you were walking in a procession or into a, you know, you were

00:18:02.680 catching a bouquet.

00:18:03.620 Dude, I probably, you know, I probably caught six bouquets for about 48 yards.

00:18:09.780 It was, it was stunning.

00:18:11.580 Just a lot of love.

00:18:12.600 There's a lot of love in that group.

00:18:14.240 You know, definitely people start looking a little bit similar because you don't do a

00:18:18.180 lot of genetic, you know, if you're not incorporating too much extra genetics every

00:18:23.680 now and then, and then people start looking a little bit similar. 0.98

00:18:27.900 But damn, it was a beautiful community, beautiful community. 0.94

00:18:31.800 And, and so it was nice and it was nice to just see, you know, see that community, walk 0.99

00:18:35.380 around.

00:18:35.880 Um, just friendly people.

00:18:39.500 They had a man out there.

00:18:40.980 He was, you know, selling different spices and stuff.

00:18:44.740 He had his own little, a little spice cart.

00:18:47.260 This little older guy.

00:18:50.160 Reminded me when I was growing up, actually, they had this dude, my dad knew named Cinnamon

00:18:55.020 Wilson.

00:18:55.580 And this guy, I hadn't thought about this guy forever.

00:18:58.840 When I was a child, um, Cinnamon Wilson was this dude.

00:19:03.640 He, he would let us like, kind of like, I guess, lick a little bit of cinnamon out of

00:19:09.180 his hand because we didn't always have cinnamon.

00:19:13.400 Now, you know, I'm living in a, you know, a different world these days.

00:19:17.380 I got cinnamon at the house.

00:19:19.300 But when I was young, we had, you know, we didn't have as much cinnamon as we wanted.

00:19:23.000 And cinnamon, now kids are screwing around, they're doing cinnamon challenges and they're

00:19:28.720 hiding, you know, hiding cinnamon between their, you know, their buttocks and stuff like 1.00

00:19:32.860 that and, and staring into the sun and just doing wild, you know, unnecessary tricks.

00:19:39.420 But when I was young, you didn't get cinnamon all the time.

00:19:42.680 You had, you didn't have as many flavors.

00:19:44.040 You had orange, grape, you know, peppermint.

00:19:47.080 You could get that anywhere.

00:19:48.920 But cinnamon, that was a special flavor.

00:19:51.120 And my dad's buddy, Cinnamon Wilson, bruh, or Mr. Wilson, but we called him Cinnamon

00:19:55.660 Wilson.

00:19:56.080 He put a little bit of cinnamon in his hand.

00:19:58.160 I guess he would maybe wet his hand or something, either, you know, lick it or cry into it a

00:20:02.160 little bit.

00:20:03.060 And then he would put some cinnamon in there and he'd hold the cinnamon down by us while

00:20:08.360 he was talking to my dad.

00:20:09.440 He let us lick it out of his hand.

00:20:12.800 And he was gentle, you know, he had those big, soft senior citizen hands, you know, because

00:20:17.820 my dad, at that time, my dad was probably 75 years old.

00:20:21.000 So all of my dad's friends were 75.

00:20:24.360 And man, if you were licking cinnamon off of his hand, it felt, I mean, it almost was

00:20:30.160 like a cake. 1.00

00:20:30.880 Sometimes you almost wanted to just bite right into his damn hand meat, like it was a coffee 1.00

00:20:35.740 cake or something. 0.99

00:20:37.320 And he'd be real chill about it.

00:20:38.880 And he wasn't a pervert or anything like that.

00:20:40.700 He wasn't, you know, he wasn't, you know, you didn't see his pants, you know, expounding

00:20:45.660 in the front or any, you know, he wasn't touching your hair, trying to steal a little,

00:20:49.980 you know, cut part of your hair off and keep it at his house or anything wicked. 0.65

00:20:54.180 He was just, he liked giving things to people, I guess.

00:20:59.240 And he was a bird trainer, too.

00:21:00.860 And he also had birds all the time.

00:21:02.700 So he was used to feeding you somebody out of his hand. 0.97

00:21:05.740 So he, you know, sometimes you fuck up, he'd reach in his pocket and next thing you know, 0.99

00:21:11.380 you got, you know, you got a mouthful of, you got a mouthful of birdseed. 1.00

00:21:17.920 You're like, fuck, I thought I was getting, you know, some of that tasty, sweet powder, 1.00

00:21:23.480 that cinnamon on, baby. 0.99

00:21:25.620 Because cinnamon was, when I was young, cinnamon was brand new.

00:21:31.020 Now cinnamon's old hat.

00:21:32.540 Now they got all kind of new stuff.

00:21:33.820 Kratom and these kids are on, you know, what else?

00:21:38.720 Jinko, biloba, all of that.

00:21:41.180 You know, what else are kids doing nowadays?

00:21:44.840 Tangerine. 1.00

00:21:45.340 They didn't have that shit when I was young. 0.99

00:21:48.100 When I was young, we had more, you know, cinnamon was a new, something brand new. 0.99

00:21:53.900 So if you saw Mr. Wilson and he fucking hit you with that low palm, you know, 0.98

00:21:58.320 hand down with a little, you'd go over there and you'd just get you 1.00

00:22:03.680 a couple of fucking tongue whips of that cinnamon. 0.99

00:22:08.140 And then the other kids would see you get it. 1.00

00:22:09.940 My brothers or sisters would see me get it and they'd want to get a little hit of it.

00:22:14.400 So it was pretty fun.

00:22:15.520 It was like a fun game.

00:22:16.280 But he was a bird trainer and he would train birds, you know.

00:22:19.860 And he, well, I guess he didn't train them really,

00:22:22.620 but he would like feed them and just look at them for a long time, you know.

00:22:25.560 But some people call him train and he ate a lot of bird eggs, too.

00:22:31.980 That's one thing about the man when I look back on him because he passed now.

00:22:35.500 He's with Christ or whomever he, you know, whomever he favors.

00:22:40.280 But he, dude, he'd have all kind of, he, he, I'll say this.

00:22:45.120 He was doing stuff he shouldn't have been doing with the bird eggs 0.99

00:22:47.380 because he'll have a, he'll have a damn nightingale omelet. 0.99

00:22:50.100 I'm like, what the hell is that? 0.99

00:22:52.620 I don't think, I think, you know, you're not supposed to have that. 0.99

00:22:55.660 And you go over there and he'd have a damn duck omelet. 1.00

00:22:58.520 I'm like, what the fuck? 1.00

00:23:00.720 Because I grew up, where I'm from, you just have chicken omelets. 0.99

00:23:03.300 In Vietnam and some places like that, they got the, you know,

00:23:07.240 they have the balut duck eggs.

00:23:09.700 They got all those Fear Factor snacks and stuff like that,

00:23:12.820 that Fear Factor breakfast buffet. 0.99

00:23:15.320 People out there drinking fucking, you know, 1.00

00:23:17.720 quarts and quarts of rhinoceros semen. 1.00

00:23:22.080 But I don't, dude, we wasn't drinking big animal semen in our area. 1.00

00:23:26.820 When I was growing up, we had regular shit. 0.98

00:23:30.220 But he would have, that's one thing in hindsight 0.99

00:23:32.540 he shouldn't have been doing probably with some of those birds

00:23:34.400 just harvesting their eggs and making, you know,

00:23:37.760 unique or extracurricular style omelets. 0.99

00:23:41.220 Because you'd see that dude, he'd be having a fucking, you know, 0.99

00:23:44.520 tomato with sparrow omelet. 1.00

00:23:46.200 And you're like, what the fuck is that? 0.99

00:23:48.820 He's over there really harvesting. 1.00

00:23:51.700 But man, we had a good time in Utah.

00:23:53.900 Thank you to the people that came out.

00:23:56.100 I do, you know, I don't know if I apologize

00:23:58.200 for not doing the meet and greet on Saturday.

00:24:00.840 I was just, honestly, I was just exhausted

00:24:03.240 and I just needed to kind of do some things

00:24:05.300 to take care of myself.

00:24:06.280 So, um, I wasn't trying to be selfish, but, you know,

00:24:13.780 I don't know, man.

00:24:14.600 I'm just still kind of learning what it's like

00:24:16.380 to have people come out and to, you know,

00:24:20.080 a lot of this kind of stuff is, I don't know.

00:24:24.020 It's like being in like a new relationship or something.

00:24:26.660 I don't know.

00:24:27.180 I can't explain it.

00:24:28.020 And maybe I'm overthinking it in some ways,

00:24:30.060 but, you know, but a lot of good people

00:24:32.640 come out to these shows.

00:24:33.680 I can't, I can't explain that to you enough.

00:24:36.560 You know, I've been doing this comedy for 15 years. 0.99

00:24:40.780 And over the time, I've had some fucking jackrabbits 0.99

00:24:43.520 and damn, dude, one time I remember being in Toledo 0.99

00:24:46.900 and they had like an arsonist recovery group. 0.99

00:24:51.000 And I'm all about recovery.

00:24:52.660 You know that.

00:24:54.220 12 steps, I'm on 144 steps, man.

00:24:56.960 I need all, I need to just constantly be on the staircase.

00:25:00.620 But these boys, these were some arsonists. 0.99

00:25:03.680 You know, them fucking, you know, 1.00

00:25:07.260 just a bunch of damn Candlezoros. 1.00

00:25:10.240 I mean, they'll fucking light a candle 1.00

00:25:11.480 and just, you know, burn down a damn doghouse or something. 0.99

00:25:16.560 And I respect them and stuff, but that, you know, 0.99

00:25:18.980 that's the kind of people that were out there

00:25:20.440 getting free tickets.

00:25:22.060 People that's used to burning down hospital, you know,

00:25:25.320 arsonists, people that does arson.

00:25:27.600 You know, the kind of guy who lights a cigarette

00:25:29.620 and that ain't enough.

00:25:31.780 The next thing you know, he's like, 0.99

00:25:33.100 oh, fuck, he'll hold that lighter 1.00

00:25:34.660 against the side of a damn federal building 1.00

00:25:37.420 for an hour and a half. 0.99

00:25:39.500 So, but to have people that are really coming out

00:25:42.580 in that, you know, in that care

00:25:44.620 and it's just exciting.

00:25:46.220 And it's an excitement that in some ways

00:25:48.060 I'm just getting used to.

00:25:49.480 And then it's a lot, you know, you get,

00:25:53.920 it's a lot and it's new.

00:25:55.420 And, you know, I hadn't been taking

00:25:56.460 that good care of myself.

00:25:57.340 I've been trying to do more working out

00:25:58.700 and staying athletic and, you know,

00:26:00.800 getting my blood going just to keep my brain

00:26:04.220 in a more comfortable place.

00:26:06.680 Because I guess I just feel like

00:26:08.020 some more responsibility and stuff these days.

00:26:10.720 But I'm grateful to the people that came out.

00:26:12.540 If I didn't get to meet you,

00:26:13.820 then we'll do it next time.

00:26:15.840 And thank you guys very much in Utah.

00:26:21.780 What else?

00:26:22.500 I have D.C. and Lexington coming up.

00:26:25.620 And then we got to,

00:26:26.740 we do, there's a bunch of new dates for the spring.

00:26:28.940 And I'm so excited.

00:26:31.540 I think late spring,

00:26:33.060 it's looking like I'm going to, you know,

00:26:34.700 jump across the pond.

00:26:36.640 Maybe in both directions for Australia and the U.K.

00:26:41.320 So that should be good stuff.

00:26:43.360 As always, you can hit the hotline

00:26:45.740 to be a part of the show.

00:26:46.760 And that number is 985-664-9503.

00:26:55.080 Yeah, and I'm happy to be home, man.

00:26:57.620 You know, I had a nice time though in Salt Lake City.

00:26:59.900 It's a beautiful city.

00:27:01.460 And you need skin moisturizer though in Salt Lake City.

00:27:05.360 If you're going to Salt Lake City

00:27:06.880 and you don't have any moisturizer,

00:27:08.960 you might not make it.

00:27:10.580 Dude, I woke up in the morning,

00:27:12.700 I'm scratching and itching,

00:27:14.240 I'm bleeding on it, you know,

00:27:15.960 my elbows and stuff, everything's dry.

00:27:19.440 My mind feels, you know,

00:27:20.880 my mouth tastes like I maybe,

00:27:22.400 you know, like old Cinnamon Wilson

00:27:23.760 hit me with about nine handfuls

00:27:25.560 while I was sleeping.

00:27:27.400 I'm dried out. 0.99

00:27:28.460 I thought a damn scorpion 0.99

00:27:30.300 was going to just crawl out of one side of my mouth. 0.99

00:27:32.460 Because I was just,

00:27:35.700 you know, it's dry.

00:27:37.620 So I say if you go up there,

00:27:39.280 take extra water,

00:27:41.200 you know,

00:27:41.660 the airport should let you bring water to Utah.

00:27:44.680 Because you need it.

00:27:46.440 Take extra water,

00:27:47.640 moisturizer. 1.00

00:27:49.060 Fuck, I don't care if you buy 1.00

00:27:50.100 a couple damn bags of plasma 1.00

00:27:51.560 off the, you know, 1.00

00:27:52.580 off the black web or whatever.

00:27:54.540 But show up 1.00

00:27:55.380 because that shit, 1.00

00:27:56.080 you'll be dried out. 1.00

00:27:58.460 Dude, you show up,

00:27:59.620 you have a ninth birthday party

00:28:01.980 in Salt Lake City.

00:28:05.460 And by the time it's over,

00:28:06.740 you'll look about 35. 1.00

00:28:08.880 Dude, that shit, 1.00

00:28:09.380 you get, 1.00

00:28:09.940 dude, moisture.

00:28:12.320 Dude, moisture is God's buttercream.

00:28:16.180 And he put it into us

00:28:17.200 because he wants us to stay frothy.

00:28:19.660 And they're not doing that

00:28:21.700 very well in Utah.

00:28:23.800 But a beautiful place.

00:28:24.920 I went to go visit my buddy Josh Kelly.

00:28:27.080 And he is a,

00:28:28.380 he's a musician.

00:28:29.940 And he,

00:28:30.700 I used to work as a tour manager for him.

00:28:32.320 One of my first jobs

00:28:33.640 was tour managing

00:28:35.680 for Mr. Joshua Kelly.

00:28:38.340 And he's had some good hits

00:28:39.440 over the years.

00:28:39.980 And he comes from a very talented family.

00:28:43.820 And he has a farm up there.

00:28:45.380 And they got pigs 0.61

00:28:46.200 and little,

00:28:47.360 you know,

00:28:48.300 goats.

00:28:49.600 And they got foster children.

00:28:51.700 I'm not counting those as animals.

00:28:53.080 They're beautiful.

00:28:53.680 He's got two beautiful

00:28:54.480 little foster girls.

00:28:56.400 And it just really lifted my heart up

00:28:58.360 in a lot of ways.

00:28:59.620 You know,

00:29:00.360 it's really special

00:29:01.060 when you see somebody

00:29:02.360 doing foster care

00:29:04.540 and doing it well.

00:29:06.200 And just,

00:29:07.340 you know,

00:29:09.380 just opening their arms

00:29:10.780 and their,

00:29:11.520 their lives

00:29:13.300 and their hearts

00:29:13.920 and their wallets,

00:29:15.200 you know,

00:29:15.700 to help,

00:29:18.140 you know,

00:29:19.200 to help some young children.

00:29:20.340 And one of his foster children

00:29:21.400 is from Louisiana.

00:29:23.120 And I hope I'm not talking

00:29:24.720 outside of shop

00:29:25.520 or outside of school here.

00:29:26.560 But,

00:29:27.220 you know,

00:29:27.500 it's kind of,

00:29:28.360 you know,

00:29:28.760 for me,

00:29:29.220 just being from Louisiana,

00:29:30.360 it was just,

00:29:30.940 it's just kind of a special thing.

00:29:32.240 So,

00:29:32.760 we went over there

00:29:33.660 and petted the animals

00:29:34.540 by his house.

00:29:35.360 They got donkeys

00:29:36.200 and they got some fainting,

00:29:38.780 you know,

00:29:40.220 whatever those are,

00:29:40.960 little fainting javelinas 1.00

00:29:42.240 or something

00:29:42.700 they had Christmas bells on.

00:29:45.280 And dude,

00:29:45.920 it's beautiful.

00:29:47.420 I know that,

00:29:48.320 you know,

00:29:48.600 I don't,

00:29:49.640 you know,

00:29:50.160 I've seen some animals,

00:29:51.300 I've seen an animal

00:29:51.980 get hit by lightning.

00:29:53.040 I've seen a Doberman

00:29:53.940 jump out the back 0.99

00:29:54.780 of a damn, 1.00

00:29:55.840 you know, 0.99

00:29:56.500 a Nissan truck

00:29:57.780 doing about 80

00:29:59.100 on the interstate

00:29:59.900 and he did it by himself.

00:30:01.420 That Doberman,

00:30:02.400 he didn't want to be alive,

00:30:03.900 I guess,

00:30:04.480 but,

00:30:05.400 but I've never seen,

00:30:08.360 you know,

00:30:09.180 they have one of these,

00:30:10.560 you know,

00:30:11.720 these javelinas,

00:30:12.580 they got these jingle bells

00:30:13.680 on them for the holidays

00:30:14.780 and then

00:30:15.380 they're like fainter.

00:30:16.920 So,

00:30:17.120 if they get spooked

00:30:17.780 or something,

00:30:18.220 they faint,

00:30:18.780 they hit the ground.

00:30:21.000 And it's almost like

00:30:21.880 musical chairs,

00:30:22.820 you know,

00:30:23.060 you're excited to hear

00:30:24.040 the music from the jingle bells

00:30:25.520 and then they faint out

00:30:26.660 and hit the ground.

00:30:28.780 So,

00:30:29.320 pretty cool to see them

00:30:30.080 have these dropping like that.

00:30:32.140 But we had some great calls

00:30:33.300 that came in.

00:30:34.000 I'm going to get to

00:30:34.640 a couple of them

00:30:35.360 and thank you guys so much

00:30:37.280 for coming out in Utah

00:30:39.140 and happy early holidays.

00:30:41.300 This is a good time.

00:30:42.680 You know,

00:30:42.980 this is a good time to,

00:30:44.420 you know,

00:30:44.900 stretch your arms out wide

00:30:48.080 and then wrap them around

00:30:50.520 somebody else.

00:30:52.060 This is that hugging season

00:30:53.200 because people are cold

00:30:55.280 and a hug,

00:30:56.720 that's like a, 1.00

00:30:57.340 that's a fucking, 1.00

00:30:58.140 that's a little scarf. 1.00

00:31:00.060 You know,

00:31:00.460 when you show up with somebody,

00:31:01.460 when you hug them,

00:31:02.100 you put them in that soft scarf.

00:31:05.500 You know,

00:31:06.160 you do that in the summertime, 0.98

00:31:07.580 you're kind of a pervert, 1.00

00:31:08.720 you're a creep, 1.00

00:31:09.720 you know, 1.00

00:31:10.500 you're a toucher.

00:31:13.060 You know,

00:31:13.560 but you do that

00:31:14.100 in the wintertime,

00:31:14.980 boy, 1.00

00:31:15.180 you're just fucking giving them 1.00

00:31:16.200 that full front body 1.00

00:31:17.380 cinnamon Wilson,

00:31:18.340 you feel me?

00:31:19.280 Just,

00:31:19.660 just,

00:31:20.640 people don't need to get that mad

00:31:21.940 if they're cold

00:31:22.480 and you hug them.

00:31:23.480 Go hug somebody that's cold.

00:31:26.740 Watch them smile.

00:31:28.420 Let's get to a couple calls

00:31:29.620 that came in,

00:31:30.460 man.

00:31:30.740 Thank you guys so much.

00:31:31.500 As always,

00:31:31.960 the hotline is

00:31:32.480 985-664-9503.

00:31:35.700 We had a great time

00:31:36.420 with our single mom

00:31:37.320 came out.

00:31:37.920 I want to thank

00:31:39.560 Justin and Roman

00:31:42.880 and,

00:31:43.980 oh man,

00:31:47.000 and I'm forgetting

00:31:47.660 his name right now.

00:31:48.940 Justin and Roman

00:31:50.140 and one other

00:31:51.840 lovely gentleman

00:31:53.040 who came out

00:31:54.260 and filmed and recorded

00:31:55.380 our single mom

00:31:56.360 voluntarily.

00:31:58.500 You know,

00:31:58.880 voluntarily, man.

00:32:00.260 And just really,

00:32:02.640 man,

00:32:02.960 just so kind.

00:32:04.640 And it was a hurry,

00:32:05.340 you know,

00:32:05.500 and I was like,

00:32:06.140 you know,

00:32:06.340 I got there like 10 minutes late,

00:32:07.620 a typical date,

00:32:08.660 you know.

00:32:09.620 Typical man date, 0.97

00:32:10.780 you know,

00:32:10.920 I'm showing up

00:32:11.400 a few minutes late.

00:32:12.720 Or me,

00:32:13.300 typical me.

00:32:14.660 So I get there

00:32:15.620 and we took the lady out 1.00

00:32:16.860 to the California's

00:32:18.400 pizza kitchen.

00:32:19.780 And they got other stuff.

00:32:20.940 They say pizza,

00:32:21.640 but they got salads,

00:32:22.620 you know.

00:32:24.260 And what else?

00:32:25.100 We went to an escape room

00:32:26.580 and played a game.

00:32:28.140 She came out

00:32:28.800 and brought her sister out,

00:32:29.840 a mother of three.

00:32:31.580 And Breezy,

00:32:32.880 that's her name.

00:32:34.240 This girl,

00:32:34.860 straight Breezy,

00:32:35.700 you know. 1.00

00:32:36.600 And that shit was 1.00

00:32:37.320 category four. 1.00

00:32:39.880 Wins,

00:32:40.360 baby.

00:32:40.700 She,

00:32:40.920 you know,

00:32:41.860 she was definitely

00:32:43.240 breezing past everybody.

00:32:45.160 You know,

00:32:45.360 she was,

00:32:45.800 you know,

00:32:46.140 she'd tick,

00:32:47.060 you know,

00:32:47.500 she'd tickle your nickel 1.00

00:32:48.580 if you,

00:32:49.560 you know,

00:32:49.980 you'd feel her go by.

00:32:50.920 She's really quite a current

00:32:52.100 of a woman

00:32:52.720 and a beautiful young mother

00:32:55.060 of three.

00:32:56.180 And we went out

00:32:57.040 and had a nice time.

00:32:57.980 And those guys

00:32:58.840 volunteered their time.

00:33:00.600 and they went

00:33:02.800 and planned ahead

00:33:03.640 and,

00:33:04.060 you know,

00:33:05.880 it's a great time

00:33:08.220 of year to do that,

00:33:08.960 to fill other people's hearts

00:33:10.140 with your time

00:33:11.700 and your ability.

00:33:14.160 And they just

00:33:15.000 reminded me of that.

00:33:15.920 They reminded me of,

00:33:17.100 it's funny,

00:33:19.660 even if I'm somewhere

00:33:20.420 helping out,

00:33:21.080 I'm somewhere

00:33:21.620 taking the mom out,

00:33:23.380 I don't always feel like

00:33:24.460 I'm doing something

00:33:25.240 for some reason.

00:33:26.860 But those guys,

00:33:27.800 man,

00:33:27.940 they showed up

00:33:28.620 and,

00:33:29.320 you know,

00:33:29.640 capturing the audio

00:33:30.580 and video.

00:33:31.460 And it was,

00:33:32.380 man,

00:33:32.560 it was fun.

00:33:33.620 It was really,

00:33:34.380 really fun.

00:33:34.700 I'll put a picture of them

00:33:35.620 of us up on the Instagrams

00:33:37.480 so you can see it.

00:33:39.080 But let's get to a couple

00:33:39.920 calls that came in.

00:33:40.920 As always,

00:33:41.360 the hotline,

00:33:41.820 985-664-9503.

00:33:45.980 We got some really,

00:33:46.960 really great ones.

00:33:48.060 People calling in about,

00:33:49.440 you know,

00:33:49.740 helping out with Nutvember.

00:33:51.000 People staying on their grind

00:33:52.300 and staying off their little

00:33:53.780 meat,

00:33:54.240 you know,

00:33:54.640 meat shooter

00:33:55.280 and trying not to do

00:33:56.920 touch-touch at the house,

00:33:58.300 you know. 0.99

00:33:58.960 Trying not to fucking 0.99

00:34:00.040 feed cinnamon to their Wilson, 0.99

00:34:02.100 you feel me?

00:34:03.640 As always,

00:34:04.360 I want to let you know

00:34:05.100 that today's episode

00:34:06.480 is brought to you

00:34:07.000 by HelloFresh.

00:34:08.560 And look,

00:34:09.160 there's a lot of things

00:34:09.900 I wouldn't eat.

00:34:11.420 Well,

00:34:11.940 is that true?

00:34:12.560 Actually, 0.97

00:34:12.840 I just fucking admitted 0.98

00:34:13.780 that I've eaten cinnamon 0.99

00:34:14.580 out of a man's hand

00:34:15.620 that my dad barely knew.

00:34:18.360 But there's a company

00:34:19.480 called HelloFresh.

00:34:21.240 And this past weekend

00:34:22.360 is supported in part

00:34:23.660 by HelloFresh.

00:34:25.180 And it's a great service

00:34:26.740 if you want to spend time

00:34:28.180 with your children

00:34:29.140 or your spouse

00:34:30.340 in the kitchen,

00:34:32.360 leave your phones

00:34:34.000 out in the living room

00:34:35.040 or lock them out

00:34:35.940 in the car or something

00:34:36.840 or in the van

00:34:37.540 if y'all got a van

00:34:38.500 or something

00:34:39.000 or hide them

00:34:39.860 in the garage

00:34:40.760 and you can be

00:34:44.300 and you spend time

00:34:46.020 you and your spouse,

00:34:47.460 you're cutting the radishes,

00:34:48.880 you know,

00:34:49.240 you're,

00:34:49.720 you know,

00:34:51.360 maybe you hug,

00:34:52.320 you know,

00:34:52.620 you're reaching around

00:34:53.920 your spouse

00:34:54.520 because you want to,

00:34:55.840 you know,

00:34:57.180 you know,

00:34:58.680 feel the noodle soup

00:35:00.000 or whatever.

00:35:00.660 You're spending time together.

00:35:02.460 That's what HelloFresh does. 1.00

00:35:04.720 And it has great food.

00:35:06.260 They deliver the ingredients

00:35:07.380 right to your house

00:35:08.040 and it's quick.

00:35:08.900 You can make it fast

00:35:09.800 but you're still spending time together.

00:35:11.680 I think it's a great fit

00:35:12.880 for today's lifestyles.

00:35:16.100 And it delivers

00:35:16.900 your favorite recipes

00:35:17.780 and pre-measured ingredients.

00:35:20.140 So if you got the kid there

00:35:21.500 and he ain't doing well

00:35:22.420 in school,

00:35:24.040 at least he could,

00:35:24.840 you know,

00:35:25.700 this is like,

00:35:26.380 you know,

00:35:26.720 anybody that's got a C average

00:35:28.220 can make this stuff.

00:35:30.160 They have three plans

00:35:31.300 to choose from,

00:35:31.980 classic veggie and family.

00:35:33.420 Each box.

00:35:34.660 They send you the box,

00:35:35.700 man,

00:35:35.780 and it's nice,

00:35:36.420 nice box.

00:35:37.300 They got, 1.00

00:35:38.020 fuck, 1.00

00:35:38.300 you could, 1.00

00:35:38.720 you know,

00:35:39.520 you could use the box

00:35:40.480 for other stuff

00:35:41.140 if you want.

00:35:42.140 You know,

00:35:42.500 get a little animal

00:35:43.320 and put it under there. 0.55

00:35:44.240 They got holes in the box.

00:35:45.240 The animal can breathe.

00:35:46.160 You could do that later

00:35:47.020 for dessert

00:35:47.620 and just pet the animal.

00:35:49.840 Non-edible dessert

00:35:50.860 just befriending a creature.

00:35:53.580 But each box

00:35:54.500 is made up of fresh,

00:35:55.480 responsibly obtained ingredients

00:35:57.540 from carefully selected

00:35:59.360 farms and high-rated

00:36:00.560 trusted sources.

00:36:02.340 Recipes take around

00:36:03.180 30 minutes.

00:36:04.360 They get delicious

00:36:05.020 filling meals delivered

00:36:05.920 right to your door.

00:36:06.560 It's healthy.

00:36:07.060 It's good.

00:36:07.780 And I promise you,

00:36:08.360 it is fun,

00:36:08.860 man.

00:36:08.940 I'm not joking.

00:36:09.820 This is a real joy,

00:36:11.400 especially this time of year.

00:36:13.940 Slow it down.

00:36:15.580 Do something

00:36:16.100 with your loved ones.

00:36:18.280 Go into the year

00:36:19.380 with a built-up bank

00:36:20.940 of just worth

00:36:24.640 and value

00:36:25.440 and esteem.

00:36:27.380 And I know I'm putting

00:36:28.080 a lot on Hella Fresh,

00:36:28.800 but, you know,

00:36:29.780 I like it.

00:36:31.540 For $20 off

00:36:32.880 your first three boxes,

00:36:34.600 which is a total

00:36:35.480 of $60 off,

00:36:37.040 visit HelloFresh.com

00:36:38.820 slash

00:36:39.700 T-H-E-O 1.00

00:36:41.340 six

00:36:41.960 zero

00:36:42.520 and enter promo code

00:36:44.400 T-H-E-O 1.00

00:36:45.540 six

00:36:46.220 zero.

00:36:47.400 That's

00:36:47.640 HelloFresh.com

00:36:48.740 slash

00:36:49.520 Theo

00:36:50.060 number six

00:36:51.560 number zero.

00:36:52.580 Code

00:36:52.840 Theo

00:36:53.340 number six

00:36:54.560 number zero

00:36:55.460 for a total

00:36:56.280 of $60

00:36:57.040 off.

00:36:59.080 Okay,

00:36:59.520 let's get into

00:37:00.000 a couple calls here.

00:37:00.980 We got this one

00:37:01.560 right here.

00:37:02.860 Oh, man.

00:37:03.580 What's up, Theo?

00:37:04.420 This is Chris

00:37:05.200 calling from Long Island,

00:37:06.420 New York.

00:37:07.720 This is my

00:37:08.060 Chris Long Island,

00:37:09.440 Strong Island,

00:37:10.320 baby.

00:37:11.600 And I don't know

00:37:12.280 why they call it

00:37:12.900 Long Island.

00:37:13.660 I mean,

00:37:13.920 it's probably,

00:37:14.580 you know,

00:37:15.100 well, 1.00

00:37:15.360 I'm an idiot. 1.00

00:37:16.080 Probably long 1.00

00:37:17.280 and feels

00:37:19.300 kind of lonesome

00:37:20.020 like I do

00:37:20.560 sometimes.

00:37:22.600 Onward.

00:37:23.380 I call for the podcast.

00:37:25.400 I don't think

00:37:26.100 it would be interesting.

00:37:27.200 I just wanted

00:37:27.640 to let you know,

00:37:28.260 I just listened

00:37:28.740 to the Nutvember

00:37:29.880 podcast

00:37:31.300 from last weekend

00:37:31.920 at the end.

00:37:33.240 Yep,

00:37:33.740 and I'm going on

00:37:34.560 right now.

00:37:35.060 Let me see.

00:37:38.460 I got about

00:37:39.280 six days

00:37:40.000 of that juicy,

00:37:40.920 juicy in me

00:37:41.640 right now.

00:37:43.160 You know,

00:37:43.740 if you hear

00:37:44.140 something kind of,

00:37:45.180 if when I'm talking

00:37:46.000 you hear a little bit

00:37:46.660 of gurgling

00:37:47.240 in the back

00:37:47.700 of my throat,

00:37:48.340 that's my chi

00:37:49.020 building up

00:37:49.840 because I'm

00:37:51.320 nutted up.

00:37:52.900 You know,

00:37:54.100 I got that,

00:37:55.060 I got that

00:37:55.860 cinnamon stack

00:37:56.640 starting to build

00:37:57.380 in the back of me.

00:37:59.800 You know,

00:38:00.360 that's what I'm saying

00:38:01.040 and we can do that.

00:38:02.340 You know,

00:38:02.540 you can hold

00:38:03.000 on to your newt, 0.99

00:38:03.980 hold the line.

00:38:05.700 V at Nut.

00:38:06.620 This is our

00:38:07.240 V at Nut.

00:38:08.860 Onward.

00:38:09.680 You said

00:38:10.400 this is your 0.93

00:38:10.840 most selfish podcast 0.82

00:38:12.000 and the whole time

00:38:13.280 I listened to this podcast

00:38:14.220 I was thinking

00:38:14.680 this is his best ever,

00:38:15.940 most helpful podcast.

00:38:16.660 Just useful,

00:38:18.800 funny,

00:38:20.120 just your heart

00:38:21.320 came across

00:38:22.040 in that one.

00:38:23.060 And I just

00:38:24.200 couldn't let it go

00:38:25.120 that at the end

00:38:25.980 you thought it was

00:38:26.500 so selfish

00:38:26.980 but I know

00:38:27.580 it wasn't.

00:38:28.580 I just know

00:38:29.160 it wasn't.

00:38:29.960 So I'm just calling

00:38:30.720 to let you know

00:38:31.240 I appreciate you.

00:38:32.080 I'm getting emotional

00:38:32.720 now.

00:38:32.940 I appreciate you a lot.

00:38:34.160 Just keep doing

00:38:34.760 everything you do

00:38:35.500 in the same way.

00:38:37.120 Thanks, man.

00:38:39.580 Onward, sorry.

00:38:40.740 All right.

00:38:43.320 You're not going

00:38:43.920 to call back

00:38:44.320 but my phone number

00:38:45.040 is

00:38:45.180 and just

00:38:47.300 you're doing great

00:38:47.980 and you're the best,

00:38:49.140 man.

00:38:49.360 Thanks.

00:38:50.120 Yeah, thanks for calling,

00:38:51.360 man.

00:38:51.860 I appreciate the message.

00:38:54.320 I, uh,

00:38:55.060 yeah, I don't know

00:38:57.560 why, man.

00:38:58.100 I think I've just

00:38:58.980 been feeling

00:38:59.420 really strange

00:39:00.240 recently.

00:39:00.700 I've just been

00:39:01.240 feeling like

00:39:02.060 I don't know.

00:39:06.520 I've just been

00:39:07.220 feeling like

00:39:07.980 not that good

00:39:08.700 to be honest

00:39:09.220 with you.

00:39:10.700 You know,

00:39:11.180 I've just been

00:39:11.500 feeling like

00:39:12.580 I don't know,

00:39:14.820 like no matter

00:39:15.140 what I do

00:39:15.900 like it's not

00:39:16.800 enough,

00:39:17.320 you know.

00:39:17.640 and I don't know

00:39:20.160 why I feel

00:39:20.660 that way

00:39:21.020 sometimes.

00:39:22.840 Um,

00:39:23.760 and I'm kind

00:39:25.680 of tired,

00:39:26.220 honestly, man,

00:39:26.860 I'm kind of tired

00:39:27.480 of it.

00:39:28.720 You know,

00:39:29.160 I'm tired

00:39:29.500 of feeling

00:39:29.820 that way

00:39:30.360 and I don't

00:39:31.660 know if it's

00:39:31.960 because like

00:39:32.220 we live in

00:39:32.580 like a time

00:39:33.120 now where it

00:39:33.580 like makes you

00:39:34.180 feel like you

00:39:34.460 have to always

00:39:34.940 be doing stuff

00:39:35.940 or, you know,

00:39:37.640 maybe I'm

00:39:38.020 getting older

00:39:38.640 and I'm starting

00:39:39.200 to just think

00:39:39.800 about like,

00:39:41.720 you know,

00:39:42.380 just what the

00:39:42.960 vow, like,

00:39:43.680 you know,

00:39:44.100 what's important.

00:39:44.820 I don't know

00:39:45.360 but I

00:39:47.620 appreciate you

00:39:48.060 saying that.

00:39:48.640 That's nice

00:39:49.080 of you, man.

00:39:49.580 You know

00:39:49.820 what?

00:39:51.160 Let me get

00:39:51.860 this hitter

00:39:52.380 right here.

00:39:54.000 This is the

00:39:54.540 free, we live

00:39:55.380 in 2018.

00:39:56.420 I can call

00:39:56.940 people back.

00:39:59.080 Let me see

00:39:59.620 what I can do

00:40:00.280 here.

00:40:12.600 I can't do

00:40:12.920 this one.

00:40:14.900 Chris.

00:40:15.360 Oh, hey,

00:40:20.820 Chris.

00:40:22.040 Yes.

00:40:22.620 Hey, what

00:40:22.960 up, man?

00:40:23.320 This is Theo.

00:40:27.980 Oh, man,

00:40:28.600 I'm doing good,

00:40:29.340 man.

00:40:29.480 I was just

00:40:29.760 listening to your

00:40:30.200 message, man.

00:40:30.780 I thought it

00:40:31.080 was real,

00:40:31.500 real nice of you,

00:40:32.060 dude.

00:40:32.160 I just wanted

00:40:32.460 to call and

00:40:32.860 say thanks.

00:40:33.240 Oh, man,

00:40:33.780 I meant that.

00:40:35.120 That was such

00:40:36.180 a great podcast.

00:40:37.000 When you said

00:40:37.440 it was selfish

00:40:37.920 at the end,

00:40:38.360 I said,

00:40:38.640 oh, no,

00:40:39.300 I never felt

00:40:39.880 like calling,

00:40:40.400 but I said,

00:40:40.740 I had to just

00:40:41.180 say it.

00:40:41.560 I had to tell

00:40:41.980 you.

00:40:42.540 Well, I

00:40:42.900 appreciate it,

00:40:43.400 man.

00:40:43.540 For one,

00:40:43.900 it's nice to

00:40:44.320 hear a New York

00:40:44.820 accent, dude.

00:40:45.440 It makes me feel

00:40:45.880 like I'm doing

00:40:46.400 something with

00:40:46.920 my life.

00:40:47.720 It makes me feel

00:40:48.440 like I'm caught

00:40:48.940 up into the

00:40:50.780 underworld of

00:40:51.640 some type of

00:40:53.120 mafia style in 0.78

00:40:54.080 my brain.

00:40:56.500 Well, I don't

00:40:57.200 know if it's

00:40:57.580 exactly like that,

00:40:58.420 but I got a

00:41:00.100 bunch of friends

00:41:00.640 I turned on to

00:41:01.380 you, and we

00:41:01.820 all really

00:41:02.720 appreciate it.

00:41:03.400 I go through

00:41:06.800 some similar

00:41:07.580 struggles, and I'm

00:41:08.580 trying to get

00:41:09.080 sober myself.

00:41:10.560 It almost

00:41:12.380 sounds embarrassing

00:41:12.960 to say, but I

00:41:14.100 relate to it.

00:41:14.860 I relate to all

00:41:15.660 of it, and I

00:41:16.460 get straight from

00:41:17.140 it, and I just

00:41:18.140 appreciate it so

00:41:18.920 much.

00:41:19.200 I really appreciate

00:41:20.060 you so much,

00:41:20.920 brother.

00:41:21.740 Well, thanks,

00:41:22.560 dude.

00:41:22.800 Yeah, I guess I

00:41:24.660 don't know why I

00:41:25.200 just feel like that

00:41:25.920 sometimes, man.

00:41:26.500 I guess I just

00:41:27.080 feel...

00:41:28.780 Yeah, I don't

00:41:29.180 know.

00:41:29.340 It's like I'll

00:41:29.880 do an episode

00:41:31.800 or something, and

00:41:32.540 then I just feel

00:41:33.380 like, I don't

00:41:33.920 know, like I

00:41:34.420 just didn't...

00:41:35.880 I don't know.

00:41:36.900 I don't know.

00:41:37.700 I've just been

00:41:38.060 feeling, I think,

00:41:38.700 really strange, like

00:41:39.460 not being able to

00:41:40.060 feel of use or

00:41:42.140 of value, you

00:41:43.160 know?

00:41:44.060 Really?

00:41:45.000 Really?

00:41:45.680 Yeah.

00:41:47.480 Man, just...

00:41:48.720 But I don't...

00:41:49.740 I guess I could

00:41:51.020 understand it, but

00:41:51.840 it's hard for me to

00:41:52.560 believe it, because

00:41:53.320 I feel like you

00:41:54.540 must be getting so

00:41:55.380 much love back

00:41:56.220 right now.

00:41:56.800 You must be,

00:41:57.460 no, Theo?

00:41:57.920 Yeah, no, I

00:41:59.280 get a lot of...

00:41:59.780 Yeah, I get a lot

00:42:00.500 of people that,

00:42:02.420 you know, send

00:42:03.480 nice messages, send

00:42:04.760 nice DMs, people

00:42:05.860 come out to the

00:42:06.420 show and say nice

00:42:07.200 stuff.

00:42:07.740 I don't know what

00:42:08.400 it is, man.

00:42:08.860 Well, I was

00:42:10.300 listening to your

00:42:11.120 voicemail, and it

00:42:11.840 just kind of hit me.

00:42:12.680 I was like, man,

00:42:13.320 then I don't know

00:42:13.920 why I don't have

00:42:15.280 like a healthy

00:42:17.600 view of like just

00:42:19.020 whatever's going

00:42:19.640 on in my own

00:42:20.220 world, you know?

00:42:21.560 Yeah, yeah, but

00:42:22.260 man, that makes a

00:42:23.480 lot of sense to me,

00:42:24.100 because I've been

00:42:25.680 a teacher, I've been

00:42:26.300 a public school

00:42:26.840 teacher for 11

00:42:27.520 years.

00:42:28.300 And I get the

00:42:29.100 most beautiful

00:42:29.740 letters written to

00:42:30.500 me by my students

00:42:31.320 about how much I've

00:42:32.300 affected them and

00:42:33.160 helped them and

00:42:34.060 touched them and

00:42:34.660 they learned from

00:42:35.180 me.

00:42:35.720 But yet in my own

00:42:36.380 personal life, I'm 0.99

00:42:37.260 still all fucked up 0.99

00:42:38.120 in my head and I 0.99

00:42:38.860 still can't do the

00:42:40.040 things I want to

00:42:40.760 do.

00:42:41.120 And like, I got

00:42:42.000 two daughters and

00:42:42.720 I know I'm a good

00:42:43.680 dad, but yet still I

00:42:45.220 can't get out of my

00:42:45.900 own way when it

00:42:46.840 comes to my own

00:42:47.460 health and just

00:42:48.520 being okay with me

00:42:49.480 fully.

00:42:50.600 Yeah.

00:42:50.800 I guess it's just,

00:42:51.620 I guess it's not

00:42:52.280 just everything you get

00:42:53.140 back.

00:42:53.500 I guess it's hard to

00:42:54.580 explain that.

00:42:55.280 We gotta, like it's a

00:42:56.300 practice.

00:42:56.660 We gotta keep

00:42:57.200 working on it maybe,

00:42:58.120 you know?

00:42:58.380 Yeah, I don't know.

00:42:59.920 I mean, even while

00:43:00.380 you're saying that,

00:43:00.900 it's got me kind of

00:43:01.560 thinking about it.

00:43:02.220 Yeah, I don't, that's

00:43:03.200 so wild that we can't,

00:43:05.920 yeah, it's like we

00:43:06.580 won't give ourselves,

00:43:09.080 I guess it's like I'm

00:43:10.160 scared to feel like good

00:43:11.460 about myself because

00:43:12.400 it's like, I don't

00:43:14.680 know if I just don't

00:43:15.820 know, like I'm, what

00:43:18.540 if I start feeling good

00:43:19.340 about myself, am I

00:43:20.060 going to feel like too

00:43:20.920 good about myself?

00:43:22.000 Am I going to be,

00:43:23.600 become like a bad

00:43:24.620 person?

00:43:25.020 I don't know.

00:43:26.160 I don't know.

00:43:27.400 It's like you're full

00:43:28.180 of doubt, like just

00:43:29.140 full of doubt, like

00:43:30.020 that's not sure.

00:43:31.140 I mean, I don't want

00:43:32.100 to put words into

00:43:32.680 your mouth, but it

00:43:33.720 sounds like you're

00:43:34.380 just like doubtful,

00:43:36.200 just not, I don't

00:43:36.800 know.

00:43:37.020 Yeah, like I don't

00:43:37.560 deserve to feel, like

00:43:38.500 I don't know if it's

00:43:39.020 I don't deserve to

00:43:39.900 feel good, but like

00:43:41.740 if somebody, I don't

00:43:43.120 know, I don't know,

00:43:44.040 man, this is

00:43:44.400 interesting.

00:43:44.760 That's why when I

00:43:45.300 heard this, I was

00:43:45.760 like, oh God, and

00:43:46.760 you left your number,

00:43:47.500 I was like, I'm

00:43:47.880 going to freaking

00:43:48.220 call this dude 0.62

00:43:48.920 back.

00:43:49.300 Yeah, I almost

00:43:51.280 didn't want to leave

00:43:52.000 it because I thought

00:43:52.660 maybe then you

00:43:54.480 just called because

00:43:55.680 he wanted them to

00:43:56.260 call back, but no,

00:43:57.640 I thought I was

00:43:58.640 hoping to maybe, I

00:43:59.600 don't know, I just

00:44:00.340 left the number and

00:44:00.940 you called it, so it

00:44:01.760 worked out.

00:44:02.560 I'm keeping you on

00:44:03.380 the line too long.

00:44:04.080 You just wanted to

00:44:04.700 call to say you

00:44:05.660 appreciated it, so I

00:44:06.660 appreciate you calling

00:44:07.520 me, Theo.

00:44:08.040 Thank you so much.

00:44:09.120 Yeah, you bet, man.

00:44:10.160 Thanks so much, dude,

00:44:10.840 and this is my number.

00:44:11.640 You have it.

00:44:12.020 If you need

00:44:12.380 something, hit me up

00:44:13.020 if I can give you

00:44:13.620 some suggestions or

00:44:14.500 something about the

00:44:15.140 cast, you know, but

00:44:17.440 yeah, I don't know,

00:44:18.080 man, I don't know

00:44:18.940 what that is.

00:44:19.480 I think, you know,

00:44:20.200 maybe it's something

00:44:20.620 I need to just think

00:44:21.400 about more, talking

00:44:22.300 to like a therapist

00:44:23.120 or friends about

00:44:23.900 just, yeah, why I

00:44:25.460 just like.

00:44:27.520 Is it, you really

00:44:29.360 feel like you're not

00:44:30.580 doing the right thing

00:44:31.400 or what is it?

00:44:32.540 I just feel like

00:44:33.620 just, yeah, just

00:44:34.320 disconnected or I

00:44:35.360 just feel, I don't

00:44:36.720 know, I feel like

00:44:37.960 I.

00:44:38.780 From what everyone

00:44:39.520 says, LA is a hard

00:44:40.780 place to really

00:44:41.400 connect with people

00:44:42.140 on that level, I

00:44:43.020 guess.

00:44:43.300 I don't know, is

00:44:43.760 that part of it or.

00:44:45.300 Yeah, no, it

00:44:46.180 definitely is.

00:44:46.760 It's not like, yeah,

00:44:48.080 you don't have a

00:44:48.540 lot of like connective

00:44:49.340 conversations and

00:44:50.200 stuff out here.

00:44:51.560 Right.

00:44:52.480 I don't know, you

00:44:53.400 know, I don't know

00:44:53.780 what it is that maybe

00:44:54.380 I just need to go to

00:44:54.940 more meetings and just

00:44:55.880 kind of like listen to

00:44:56.800 others, you know, or

00:44:57.560 something.

00:44:57.940 I don't know what it

00:44:58.520 is.

00:44:59.480 But yeah, man, I

00:44:59.940 appreciate the call,

00:45:00.560 man.

00:45:00.640 It was really nice of

00:45:01.320 you, dude.

00:45:01.580 It was like the

00:45:01.940 nicest thing I got.

00:45:02.880 So thank you.

00:45:04.320 Theo, thank you.

00:45:05.340 Keep doing you.

00:45:06.360 I wish you the best of

00:45:07.600 luck and all my love

00:45:08.880 and just thank you so

00:45:09.740 much.

00:45:10.320 Thank you.

00:45:10.920 Yeah, you bet,

00:45:11.540 brother.

00:45:11.740 Have a good day, man.

00:45:12.540 Happy early holidays.

00:45:14.200 You too, Theo.

00:45:15.040 Good night, man.

00:45:15.720 Cheers, brother.

00:45:17.840 Wow, that was nice of

00:45:18.700 him, man.

00:45:20.040 You know, just nice of

00:45:20.840 him to say that.

00:45:22.360 You know, I'm going to

00:45:22.760 listen back to his call

00:45:23.720 one more time here so I

00:45:24.840 can get another vibe for

00:45:26.020 it.

00:45:26.340 Chris calling from

00:45:27.240 Long Island, New York.

00:45:28.940 This is not a call for

00:45:29.940 the podcast.

00:45:30.360 I don't think it would

00:45:32.360 be interesting.

00:45:33.340 I just wanted to let

00:45:34.020 you know, I just

00:45:34.640 listened to the

00:45:35.380 Nutvember podcast from

00:45:37.600 last week and at the

00:45:38.400 end, you said this is

00:45:40.240 your most selfish 0.95

00:45:40.940 podcast.

00:45:41.740 And the whole time I

00:45:42.920 listened to this

00:45:43.440 podcast, I was thinking

00:45:44.200 this is his best ever,

00:45:45.440 most helpful podcast.

00:45:47.100 Just useful, funny.

00:45:49.980 Just your heart came

00:45:51.120 across in that one.

00:45:53.140 Yeah, I don't know why

00:45:54.060 I've just been feeling

00:45:54.660 so selfish.

00:45:55.200 I don't know why I've

00:45:55.840 been feeling selfish.

00:45:56.700 I don't know what that

00:45:57.320 is inside of me.

00:45:58.140 I just feel selfish, man.

00:46:01.360 You know, and honestly

00:46:02.460 that I just feel kind

00:46:03.440 of like this is going

00:46:04.140 to seem crazy, man.

00:46:04.860 I just feel like ashamed

00:46:05.660 of myself for some

00:46:06.580 reason.

00:46:16.160 You know, I don't know

00:46:17.000 why I think maybe just

00:46:18.240 I don't know.

00:46:23.840 I think part of me feels

00:46:24.660 like, you know, I don't

00:46:25.200 have all the tools like,

00:46:27.220 you know, to know if I'm

00:46:28.640 like not going to fail

00:46:29.560 myself, you know.

00:46:38.660 Yeah, I don't know why,

00:46:39.660 man.

00:46:39.840 I don't know why I

00:46:40.480 just feel, I just feel

00:46:45.220 like I'm not, and I'm

00:46:46.740 not, look, I'm not

00:46:47.420 looking for like people

00:46:48.340 to say, look, you're

00:46:49.020 doing a good job and

00:46:49.820 stuff like that.

00:46:50.160 I'm trying to just feel

00:46:50.960 my feelings, you know.

00:46:52.260 You know, I'm not afraid

00:46:53.020 of my feelings.

00:46:53.660 In fact, dude, I wish I

00:46:59.040 had more feelings because

00:47:00.000 then I know what's going

00:47:00.960 on with me.

00:47:02.660 You know, when I don't

00:47:03.340 have any feelings, that's

00:47:04.260 I think that's some of

00:47:05.100 what's been going on.

00:47:05.860 I just haven't been

00:47:06.260 having a lot of feelings

00:47:07.020 and so then I get

00:47:07.760 scared, you know, because

00:47:10.080 like, you know, ever

00:47:12.120 since I got into like AA

00:47:13.240 and started doing

00:47:14.000 sobriety and that, I

00:47:16.740 started having a lot more

00:47:17.600 feelings, you know, and

00:47:18.500 some of them for the

00:47:19.080 first time in my whole

00:47:19.740 life.

00:47:20.640 So I started like, you

00:47:22.360 know, for like the first

00:47:23.060 time in my life, I felt

00:47:23.980 like a, like a living

00:47:24.780 person, you know, because

00:47:26.620 before that, all my

00:47:27.460 feelings were just like

00:47:28.200 in my head, like all my

00:47:29.240 feelings were just like

00:47:30.040 strong thoughts and

00:47:32.100 understanding of moments

00:47:33.360 and like, you know, I'd

00:47:34.340 seen moments on

00:47:35.100 television and so I knew

00:47:36.640 how to act and all of

00:47:37.500 these moments and stuff

00:47:38.480 but I, and I was present

00:47:39.760 and I cared but I just

00:47:41.000 didn't, I couldn't feel

00:47:41.900 that good and then I got

00:47:44.480 into AA and I could just

00:47:45.420 feel better or I could

00:47:48.080 feel at all and I think

00:47:50.020 maybe I've just been

00:47:50.620 having going to enough

00:47:51.440 meetings or like, I

00:47:54.380 don't know, I think just

00:47:55.780 a lot going on, you

00:47:56.700 know, you know, and a

00:47:58.100 lot's been going on in

00:47:58.880 my life.

00:47:59.340 It's been just a

00:47:59.920 different experience.

00:48:01.260 It's been a different

00:48:02.040 experience, you know,

00:48:03.700 going from like being the

00:48:04.640 chip on your shoulder,

00:48:06.140 feeling like the

00:48:06.780 underdog and then I

00:48:09.600 guess, you know, I just

00:48:10.680 worry that like if I

00:48:11.580 start to be like, you

00:48:14.040 know, not the underdog or

00:48:15.260 start to be successful,

00:48:16.320 feel that I'm just

00:48:18.880 going to like alienate

00:48:20.160 like the person, like

00:48:27.140 I'm going to alienate

00:48:27.940 like the kid who I

00:48:32.920 always felt that like

00:48:35.240 nobody cared about, you

00:48:36.360 know, if that makes any

00:48:37.280 sense.

00:48:40.000 Like suddenly, like if I

00:48:41.340 start to like live in

00:48:43.480 this place in my life

00:48:46.040 where more people

00:48:47.280 care, then I'm like

00:48:52.280 letting go of like the 0.99

00:48:53.380 kid that I've always

00:48:54.640 or the person I've

00:48:55.480 always been who I

00:48:57.400 felt, you know, growing

00:48:58.420 up and stuff was just

00:48:59.600 somebody that nobody

00:49:00.360 cared about.

00:49:03.320 I think something like

00:49:04.660 that.

00:49:05.920 There's something to do

00:49:06.940 with that.

00:49:07.820 I don't know.

00:49:09.340 But I don't even

00:49:12.540 know, I don't

00:49:13.560 know.

00:49:13.940 I'm not trying to

00:49:14.480 make everybody, you

00:49:15.560 know, I'm not trying to

00:49:16.280 like have a Debbie

00:49:17.000 Downer type of day or

00:49:18.100 anything like that, man.

00:49:18.880 I'm not.

00:49:20.820 I'm not sad.

00:49:22.820 You know, I'm just.

00:49:25.440 You know, I'm just

00:49:26.140 trying to monitor, you

00:49:27.880 know, what's going on

00:49:28.540 with me and how I feel

00:49:29.440 and it's just been a

00:49:30.120 little bit different.

00:49:32.180 And I've always only

00:49:33.140 known kind of one way

00:49:34.100 to be, you know, and

00:49:35.000 it's hard to.

00:49:40.100 Yeah, it's weird.

00:49:40.740 It's like I don't want

00:49:41.420 to hear people tell me

00:49:42.400 that I'm good at

00:49:43.060 something.

00:49:46.500 You know, I don't

00:49:47.360 want to hear that.

00:49:48.180 Like I don't want to

00:49:48.680 hear it like at a deep

00:49:49.620 level.

00:49:49.920 Like I can hear it up

00:49:50.660 here in my ears.

00:49:51.440 Yeah, I can hear it.

00:49:52.720 I can say thank you.

00:49:53.540 I'm glad you had fun,

00:49:54.380 you know, but I think

00:49:55.580 at a deep level, I

00:49:56.540 don't want to hear

00:49:57.080 people.

00:49:58.920 You know, I'm not

00:49:59.620 mad at people that say

00:50:00.600 nice things.

00:50:01.280 That's not what I'm

00:50:01.800 saying.

00:50:02.180 That's just like at a

00:50:03.560 deeper level.

00:50:04.060 If I hear that.

00:50:07.940 I don't know.

00:50:08.680 I don't know.

00:50:09.440 A deeper level.

00:50:11.460 Somebody, if I hear

00:50:12.260 somebody tell me that.

00:50:19.660 You know, I just think

00:50:20.480 that somewhere inside of

00:50:21.980 me, I always wanted to

00:50:23.160 hear that, you know,

00:50:24.680 even though I didn't

00:50:25.400 even know that I needed

00:50:26.360 to hear it.

00:50:27.560 You know, when I was

00:50:28.300 young, I just wanted to

00:50:29.120 tell somebody just, you

00:50:30.740 know, somebody who loved

00:50:31.480 me to tell me that they,

00:50:34.120 you know, that I was

00:50:35.320 doing a good job, you

00:50:36.500 know, and that I was

00:50:37.720 okay and that I was just

00:50:38.720 a good, you know, I

00:50:40.520 was just a good kid,

00:50:41.540 you know, that I was

00:50:42.460 okay.

00:50:43.840 Even if I sometimes

00:50:44.700 wasn't doing good, you

00:50:45.760 know, that I was okay.

00:50:46.880 And I think now as an

00:50:48.100 adult, you know, having

00:50:50.360 people be excited and

00:50:53.120 having people say, you're

00:50:54.280 good at this or, you

00:50:55.640 know, it's just, you

00:50:57.980 know, it's like a new

00:50:58.640 skin, you know, and I'm

00:51:01.140 grateful.

00:51:01.620 But it's just a lot, you

00:51:04.660 know, it's so, it's like

00:51:05.560 an emotional kind of

00:51:06.420 learning curve and stuff.

00:51:08.380 And I'm not trying to

00:51:09.340 sound like egomaniacal or

00:51:10.920 anything, man.

00:51:11.560 I look, you know, we may

00:51:14.620 never say, I may never

00:51:15.600 say, we may never sell

00:51:16.700 another ticket to a comedy

00:51:17.860 show.

00:51:19.800 And I'll be back just 0.99

00:51:20.880 fucking, you know, telling 1.00

00:51:22.080 riddles to fucking 1.00

00:51:22.940 arsonists. 1.00

00:51:24.360 You know, one dude was

00:51:25.460 throwing lit matches on the

00:51:26.760 stage.

00:51:27.540 What, bro?

00:51:28.260 What are you doing,

00:51:31.380 dude?

00:51:34.080 But, but yeah, anyway, so

00:51:36.600 that's just, I don't know

00:51:38.400 that, but anyway, Chris,

00:51:39.620 that's why I feel sometimes

00:51:40.720 I guess that, I don't

00:51:41.780 know.

00:51:42.380 I got to go to more

00:51:43.100 meetings, I think, and

00:51:43.960 just get more dialed in.

00:51:45.700 But anyway, I didn't mean

00:51:46.620 to get in a weird space.

00:51:47.860 I'm so grateful for the,

00:51:49.700 you know, for this

00:51:50.280 opportunity to come home

00:51:51.460 and have this here to

00:51:54.200 talk and to listen, you

00:51:55.220 know, and I thought it

00:51:55.720 was nice of Chris to

00:51:56.540 call and leave that 0.77

00:51:57.160 message, you know.

00:51:58.260 I think we live in a

00:51:59.220 different age these days

00:52:00.180 where it's okay, you

00:52:01.260 know, young men need a

00:52:03.860 lot of help.

00:52:05.580 You know, young men need 0.98

00:52:06.440 a lot of help.

00:52:09.100 You know, there's this

00:52:10.800 attack, there's this, I

00:52:14.000 do feel sometimes like

00:52:14.980 it's a, like, it's not

00:52:15.920 an attack on young men,

00:52:17.220 but there's, they're very

00:52:18.980 much, I feel like, being

00:52:20.080 neglected, you know, in

00:52:22.860 society.

00:52:23.840 And I feel like a lot of

00:52:25.680 the choices that,

00:52:26.960 we've been led to by

00:52:31.020 stronger powers in the

00:52:32.360 world and stuff like

00:52:33.260 that have led us away

00:52:34.320 from, you know, having

00:52:37.280 some, you know, helping

00:52:40.160 our men to learn and to

00:52:41.540 grow emotionally.

00:52:43.300 And, and I'm, and I'm

00:52:46.640 part of the problem.

00:52:47.600 I'm a victim of all of

00:52:48.660 that, I think.

00:52:49.340 I'm not like a victim,

00:52:50.280 like, woe is me, like, 0.98

00:52:51.300 I need to put a damn 0.99

00:52:52.040 tourniquet or something 0.99

00:52:52.960 or, you know, bum one 1.00

00:52:54.900 of those fucking neck 1.00

00:52:56.060 braces, those one size 1.00

00:52:57.260 fits all, even though I

00:52:58.280 have more, dude, I used

00:52:59.200 to wear a children's

00:52:59.920 medium, even up to last

00:53:01.160 year, because my neck has

00:53:02.680 always been real short.

00:53:04.260 And I've always had,

00:53:05.220 like, kind of that

00:53:05.620 shorter neck and I've

00:53:06.560 wanted more of a

00:53:07.180 medium's neck.

00:53:08.380 And I would wear a

00:53:09.240 children's medium neck

00:53:10.160 brace to kind of get 0.99

00:53:11.540 that extra fucking 0.99

00:53:12.400 quarter inch, you know. 1.00

00:53:13.500 At night, I would lay

00:53:14.300 there and keep it on for

00:53:15.020 about eight minutes.

00:53:16.180 Because you're not

00:53:16.800 supposed to keep one for

00:53:17.560 longer than eight minutes

00:53:18.560 if you're not, you know,

00:53:19.940 that's not doctor

00:53:20.700 recommended.

00:53:21.300 Anyway, let's take

00:53:25.060 another call, man.

00:53:26.040 Onward.

00:53:26.600 Hey, dude.

00:53:27.580 I just want to call

00:53:28.320 and apologize, bro.

00:53:29.820 I went to your show

00:53:30.440 last night.

00:53:32.140 I went by myself,

00:53:33.260 got a little nervous

00:53:34.220 to have some drinks,

00:53:35.920 too, and I started

00:53:36.660 hooting and hollering

00:53:38.160 a little too much

00:53:38.920 up front, dude,

00:53:39.760 and I feel bad.

00:53:40.860 I feel real bad,

00:53:41.740 honestly.

00:53:42.980 So I just want to call

00:53:43.960 and apologize, man.

00:53:45.240 I hope you don't hold

00:53:45.940 it against me, and I 1.00

00:53:47.840 fucking love the shit 0.99

00:53:48.640 out of you, man. 0.99

00:53:49.300 Great show.

00:53:49.940 So, and yeah, man,

00:53:51.580 keep doing what you're

00:53:52.300 doing.

00:53:53.560 I appreciate the apology,

00:53:55.020 man.

00:53:55.520 Yeah, I forgive you, bro.

00:53:57.000 You know, I appreciate it.

00:54:00.020 You know, I don't handle

00:54:01.040 those things sometimes

00:54:01.860 super great.

00:54:02.500 Sometimes I do okay.

00:54:04.300 But my thing is,

00:54:07.200 you know, and I

00:54:07.980 understand, yeah, you

00:54:09.000 know, you're excited

00:54:09.800 and, you know, people

00:54:10.680 have too many drinks

00:54:11.540 and then you don't even

00:54:12.360 know.

00:54:12.880 Then you just work

00:54:13.700 and freelance for vodka.

00:54:15.620 You know, suddenly you're

00:54:16.440 employed by vodka and,

00:54:17.800 you know, you clocked in

00:54:19.320 for work.

00:54:21.400 But it's just tough

00:54:22.280 sometimes if the show,

00:54:23.700 like, you know, because

00:54:24.540 I want everybody to

00:54:25.340 enjoy it.

00:54:26.780 And, you know, you

00:54:27.680 know, some comedians,

00:54:28.860 they work real hard on

00:54:29.780 the art and putting it

00:54:30.740 out there, and we just

00:54:32.160 want it to be a fun

00:54:32.880 experience.

00:54:33.700 So, I don't mind people

00:54:35.820 being a part of the

00:54:36.700 show.

00:54:37.100 I just don't want them

00:54:38.200 to try and make the

00:54:38.980 show about them.

00:54:42.060 Because, yeah, I mean,

00:54:42.880 because of the show,

00:54:43.840 because I don't feel

00:54:44.360 like the show is about

00:54:45.060 me.

00:54:45.520 Like, I feel like it's

00:54:46.300 the show.

00:54:48.060 You know, I'm not up

00:54:49.020 there the whole time

00:54:49.680 like, look at me.

00:54:51.060 I'm up there thinking,

00:54:52.560 let's make it fun.

00:54:54.640 Let's, you know, this

00:54:56.720 is how we're going to

00:54:57.440 do it.

00:54:57.880 This is what, you

00:54:58.780 know, let's make it a

00:55:00.660 joyous time.

00:55:02.460 And so, that's what

00:55:03.220 happens sometimes when

00:55:04.080 somebody gets, you

00:55:04.840 know, when you clock in

00:55:06.600 and you're working for,

00:55:07.560 you know, whatever you're

00:55:09.920 drinking over there.

00:55:10.760 If you're drinking.

00:55:11.440 Sometimes a lady, I 1.00

00:55:12.400 seen this lady the other 0.52

00:55:13.280 night.

00:55:13.520 She had a little, one

00:55:14.400 of those long straws

00:55:16.340 that, you know, or one

00:55:17.280 of, could have been a 0.99

00:55:18.300 damn hospital bag. 1.00

00:55:19.840 She might have been a 1.00

00:55:20.520 registered assistant or

00:55:21.900 something.

00:55:23.060 Or, you know, one of

00:55:23.720 them plasma jockeys or 0.84

00:55:25.020 one of those ladies that 1.00

00:55:25.820 comes in at night and

00:55:26.620 they're stealing plasma

00:55:27.560 out of senior citizens. 1.00

00:55:29.040 And that shit's happening 0.99

00:55:30.160 all over over there in 0.99

00:55:31.420 some of these different

00:55:32.040 communities, the

00:55:32.800 Hasidic community.

00:55:33.720 I think they caught

00:55:35.220 somebody doing it in,

00:55:36.820 where else?

00:55:38.560 I think over in Haiti.

00:55:41.140 And they got people

00:55:42.840 popping in and, you

00:55:44.100 know, they siphon and

00:55:45.520 plasma out of somebody's

00:55:46.860 step uncle or whatever.

00:55:49.400 But, yeah, but this lady 1.00

00:55:52.400 had one of those things

00:55:53.300 going into her purse. 1.00

00:55:54.340 She's fucking sipping on 1.00

00:55:55.400 some secret sauce right 1.00

00:55:56.660 there. 1.00

00:55:57.440 Out of a damn, you 0.99

00:55:59.080 know, Pierre Cardigan or 1.00

00:56:01.660 whatever the damn, you 0.99

00:56:03.440 know, purse brand is. 1.00

00:56:04.740 These ladies are, you 1.00

00:56:06.840 know, what are the, you

00:56:10.420 know, I don't know what

00:56:11.040 it's called, bed, bath

00:56:12.120 and briefcase, whatever

00:56:13.040 ladies are carrying things 1.00

00:56:14.520 around in.

00:56:15.720 She's sipping out of that

00:56:16.820 hitter right there.

00:56:17.940 So, yeah, just, you know,

00:56:19.920 I want you to, I want

00:56:20.720 everybody to have fun. 0.99

00:56:21.580 And I don't, fucking, 1.00

00:56:22.600 it's your life. 1.00

00:56:23.920 Here's what I say.

00:56:25.180 I appreciate your

00:56:25.880 apology, man.

00:56:26.520 It's nice of you to

00:56:27.220 call.

00:56:28.660 Let's take another call.

00:56:30.480 Here we go.

00:56:32.060 Yo, Theo, this is Gabe

00:56:33.760 from Las Vegas.

00:56:35.480 What's up from Las Vegas,

00:56:36.920 boy?

00:56:37.140 I mean, that's the 1.00

00:56:37.680 devil's butthole. 1.00

00:56:41.220 Beautiful people out 0.98

00:56:42.200 there, though, dude.

00:56:43.260 Beautiful people out

00:56:44.180 there in the desert.

00:56:45.320 Las Vegas, everybody

00:56:46.340 thinks it's just a strip,

00:56:47.460 but they got a lot of

00:56:48.140 real serious, good people

00:56:49.980 out there.

00:56:51.100 You know, a lot of

00:56:51.680 Latinos, a lot of white 1.00

00:56:53.000 people with sunburn. 0.97

00:56:54.880 You know, they got a lot

00:56:55.720 of people out there

00:56:56.580 raising dogs, a lot of

00:56:57.760 animal rescue.

00:56:59.180 The one dude died, that 1.00

00:57:00.520 fucking titty maverick, 1.00

00:57:01.740 whatever his name is, was. 1.00

00:57:03.240 You know, Captain Lou

00:57:04.640 Al, you know, Lou Al

00:57:06.540 Pacino or whatever that

00:57:07.760 guy was, the desert, you

00:57:09.360 know, posse captain.

00:57:11.620 Anyway, onward.

00:57:13.120 I'm calling in about

00:57:14.340 Sydney from Monday's

00:57:17.340 podcast.

00:57:18.760 She said she was having

00:57:19.720 issues with her

00:57:20.860 boyfriend watching porn 0.98

00:57:22.900 behind her back. 1.00

00:57:24.400 Oh, yeah.

00:57:24.860 And let's, we'll say,

00:57:25.740 real quick, we're going

00:57:26.740 to go back to the

00:57:27.240 Nutvember podcast episode

00:57:28.640 last week for a couple

00:57:29.700 seconds.

00:57:30.040 She can listen to her

00:57:31.780 call and she was having

00:57:33.320 issues, sexual issues

00:57:35.140 and sensual activity

00:57:36.240 issues with her and her

00:57:38.040 man because of

00:57:38.940 pornography.

00:57:40.940 This is Sydney in

00:57:42.380 Oklahoma.

00:57:43.380 I did find out not too

00:57:45.040 long ago that my

00:57:46.320 boyfriend had been

00:57:47.500 watching porn behind my 0.97

00:57:48.600 back. 0.99

00:57:49.440 He does know that I am

00:57:50.560 against it for my own

00:57:51.680 personal reasons.

00:57:53.980 Okay, so your boyfriend

00:57:55.000 was watching the

00:57:55.540 pornography behind your 0.99

00:57:56.720 back. 0.99

00:57:57.540 And that's really a fun

00:57:58.520 place to watch it.

00:57:59.220 I'll be honest.

00:57:59.720 It's just, you know,

00:58:00.760 that makes you, but

00:58:01.800 they make it feel more

00:58:02.560 secretive.

00:58:03.400 So you heard that and

00:58:04.320 let's pop back into your

00:58:05.320 call now.

00:58:05.900 Thank you for calling

00:58:06.520 onward.

00:58:07.940 And just want to give a

00:58:09.560 little tip.

00:58:10.780 Can probably, you know,

00:58:13.440 dabble in the filmmaking

00:58:14.440 a little bit.

00:58:15.300 Send him some naughty

00:58:16.260 photos, videos,

00:58:18.220 something to get his mind

00:58:20.920 off the pornography, to

00:58:22.220 replace the pornography.

00:58:24.180 And honestly, it doesn't

00:58:25.300 even have to be any new

00:58:26.460 videos.

00:58:27.080 Most guys do just fine

00:58:29.520 with like, you know,

00:58:30.900 you send a video of

00:58:31.800 cutting some watermelon

00:58:33.720 in a bra, maybe some

00:58:35.400 strawberries, you know,

00:58:36.320 that's more than enough

00:58:38.100 for most guys.

00:58:40.000 So, yeah.

00:58:41.340 Oh, yeah.

00:58:44.040 And that's a nice idea

00:58:45.300 right there.

00:58:47.480 You know, and I think if a

00:58:48.920 woman is to do this or a 1.00

00:58:50.300 man is to do this, if you

00:58:51.660 date in a man and you are a

00:58:53.020 man and you prefer to 0.97

00:58:55.020 accompany a man, you know,

00:58:56.320 you like that longer.

00:58:57.500 You feel me?

00:58:59.340 Then what I'm saying is if

00:59:01.300 you want to send some

00:59:02.060 nudity of yourself, that's

00:59:03.440 kind of yes.

00:59:05.540 Especially if your spouse

00:59:06.740 or your partner or

00:59:07.660 whatever has a problem, if

00:59:09.860 they're suffering.

00:59:11.520 And that's what she was

00:59:12.240 saying.

00:59:13.120 Her call, she's saying

00:59:14.020 that she believes that the

00:59:15.160 pornography has affected

00:59:16.360 their, you know, sensual

00:59:19.000 activities.

00:59:20.000 You know, playing, you

00:59:21.580 know, really close game of

00:59:22.620 freeze tag.

00:59:23.400 You know what I'm saying?

00:59:24.640 You're it.

00:59:25.200 You're it.

00:59:25.820 You feel me? 0.98

00:59:26.480 Sexual. 0.99

00:59:27.640 Doing full sexual. 0.86

00:59:28.740 And so, yeah, maybe 0.91

00:59:33.520 that's one thing you

00:59:34.360 could do.

00:59:35.480 Do some real naughty

00:59:36.720 things.

00:59:37.900 And here's another tip.

00:59:39.840 If you're going to send

00:59:40.680 some nudities of yourself,

00:59:42.680 don't send your face in 0.57

00:59:44.220 them.

00:59:45.560 If you're a man or one,

00:59:46.760 I don't care what you're

00:59:47.640 sending.

00:59:48.320 Ladies, don't send your 1.00

00:59:50.440 face.

00:59:52.100 It's not that.

00:59:54.040 Just to protect

00:59:55.240 yourself.

00:59:57.240 Don't, don't, you

00:59:57.840 know.

00:59:59.720 You don't have to do

01:00:00.860 that.

01:00:02.080 You know, some ladies, 1.00

01:00:03.220 you know, they'll be

01:00:04.020 naked.

01:00:04.500 They'll send you that 0.96

01:00:05.080 nudie.

01:00:06.480 And they'll have like a

01:00:07.580 makeup on or have a hat

01:00:09.140 on.

01:00:09.500 You don't need that.

01:00:10.920 Just the body.

01:00:12.660 Because the, you know,

01:00:13.580 man, especially, they're

01:00:14.780 thinking at that point

01:00:15.760 sexual.

01:00:17.940 Or maybe I'm just

01:00:18.940 thinking that.

01:00:19.440 And maybe that's my

01:00:20.080 problem.

01:00:21.280 You know, and that's one

01:00:21.860 of the side effects of

01:00:22.900 pornography that's really

01:00:23.980 negative is, and I'll say

01:00:27.020 this for myself, and I

01:00:28.120 know this for a fact, you

01:00:29.420 start to think of sex in

01:00:30.580 like frames.

01:00:32.080 You know, you start to

01:00:32.780 think of sex in the same 0.85

01:00:33.860 way that it's shot in the

01:00:35.060 videos.

01:00:35.460 Like, okay, I see

01:00:36.840 someone, I meet them.

01:00:38.320 Okay, now we're in bed.

01:00:39.680 Now we're in this lewd

01:00:40.500 position, and I'm

01:00:41.380 envisioning this, you know, 0.96

01:00:43.240 this little crotch area or 0.97

01:00:44.780 something. 0.88

01:00:45.180 And I'm in, you know, I'm 0.53

01:00:46.220 seeing the titties out 0.84

01:00:47.300 there or something, or 0.99

01:00:48.200 seeing the balls. 0.98

01:00:49.080 If you're doing the wild, 0.99

01:00:50.960 you know, if you're out

01:00:51.580 there, you know, boar

01:00:53.340 hunting or whatever, chasing

01:00:54.620 men, but, but they, you

01:00:58.880 know, and then next thing

01:01:00.220 you know, I see this and

01:01:01.660 then this.

01:01:02.160 It's just, you think of

01:01:02.960 sex in frames, in

01:01:05.460 specific moments, more

01:01:07.580 than you think of it as

01:01:08.340 one big buffet.

01:01:11.320 You think of it as, okay,

01:01:12.580 here's a side item, there's

01:01:13.780 a side item, there's a

01:01:14.940 side item, there's a side

01:01:16.220 item.

01:01:17.120 First, the side item, we

01:01:18.340 walk in, you know, into

01:01:19.760 your place.

01:01:20.380 The second side item, we

01:01:22.760 lay down, we, you know,

01:01:23.980 look at each other's

01:01:24.900 booties or whatever.

01:01:26.180 The third side item, we

01:01:27.700 doing, you know, oral

01:01:30.000 copulation or something, 0.53

01:01:31.520 you know, playing that,

01:01:33.640 you know, doing a lippy

01:01:34.820 sticky or whatever, and

01:01:36.080 then the third, the last 0.96

01:01:37.460 one, doing full sexual. 0.97

01:01:40.120 And that, and then you

01:01:40.820 got, and then that's it.

01:01:42.120 And then everybody busts

01:01:43.480 out at the end.

01:01:44.940 And then next thing you

01:01:46.060 know, it's, you know, you

01:01:48.760 know, you chilling, man.

01:01:50.360 That's it.

01:01:51.320 You know, that's it.

01:01:53.280 Aftermath, rendezvous,

01:01:54.500 that's it.

01:01:55.040 M&M.

01:01:56.600 But what you don't

01:01:57.440 realize is, the buffet of

01:02:00.600 sex is a bigger thing.

01:02:03.220 It's more you over here, 0.99

01:02:05.340 you looking at this, you

01:02:06.760 touching, you holding

01:02:07.800 hands.

01:02:09.360 You know, you looking, they

01:02:10.840 got dirty silverware, you

01:02:12.200 asking for clean silverware.

01:02:15.000 You seeing the different

01:02:16.040 types of lettuce, you

01:02:17.180 seeing they got black

01:02:18.100 olives, they got red

01:02:19.300 olives.

01:02:19.840 You know, they got some

01:02:21.480 bruised strawberries over

01:02:22.980 here.

01:02:24.020 They got this, they got the

01:02:25.820 legs, feet, butt, cheeks,

01:02:27.820 hair.

01:02:28.700 You seeing everything, it's

01:02:29.660 a fuller picture.

01:02:31.400 And pornography kills that 0.89

01:02:32.680 full picture and it just

01:02:33.600 cuts it up into scenes.

01:02:35.400 And so that's my problem

01:02:36.380 that I have sometimes.

01:02:38.340 I've noticed for myself

01:02:39.600 anyway, it's to view,

01:02:41.120 because then you start to

01:02:42.020 view that experience with a

01:02:43.900 woman just in, in, in

01:02:46.960 still images and moments

01:02:48.460 and sex and still images

01:02:50.600 and moments and, okay, I

01:02:51.860 need to see this, I need

01:02:52.780 to see this, I need to see

01:02:53.840 this, and then everybody

01:02:55.060 needs to do full bustle. 1.00

01:02:56.980 And that's life.

01:02:58.620 But that's not it.

01:03:00.220 That is a program that

01:03:03.300 runs through us because

01:03:04.560 pornography is dirty.

01:03:06.940 Because that's dark arts. 0.93

01:03:09.040 That's dark arts, central 0.75

01:03:10.860 pornography.

01:03:13.960 I mean, the devil must, 0.88

01:03:15.460 might as well just be 0.98

01:03:16.280 damn, you know, might as 0.99

01:03:20.060 well just have put his 1.00

01:03:21.000 brain right into a damn 1.00

01:03:22.200 flat, you know, into a 1.00

01:03:23.340 computer and uploaded it

01:03:25.500 right into your life.

01:03:27.300 But here's what I'll say

01:03:28.300 this, is this, that, oh 0.99

01:03:31.800 shit, what was I talking 1.00

01:03:32.720 about? 1.00

01:03:33.420 Oh, ladies, if you're 1.00

01:03:34.300 going to send nudes, yeah,

01:03:35.200 you can do it.

01:03:35.800 Now, you could send some 0.98

01:03:36.620 pornography to your man. 0.98

01:03:38.620 And I think, now I love 0.58

01:03:39.940 this idea, the end of

01:03:40.840 the end idea, let's

01:03:41.480 play it again.

01:03:42.300 To get his mind off the

01:03:43.660 pornography, to replace

01:03:44.920 the pornography.

01:03:46.560 And honestly, it doesn't

01:03:47.680 even have to be any new

01:03:48.840 videos.

01:03:50.340 Most guys do just fine

01:03:51.880 with like, you know,

01:03:53.280 you send a video of

01:03:54.180 cutting some watermelon

01:03:56.080 in a bra, maybe some

01:03:57.780 strawberries, you know,

01:03:58.700 that's more than enough

01:04:00.480 for most guys.

01:04:02.300 Now, yeah, I agree, you

01:04:03.960 can do something romantic.

01:04:05.180 You could be, you know,

01:04:06.520 shooting an arrow or

01:04:07.680 something off the roof or

01:04:08.740 something and maybe you're

01:04:09.540 in a skirt or you could

01:04:10.740 do, you know, I do like

01:04:12.760 this idea of reframing what

01:04:14.340 pornography is.

01:04:15.920 Maybe you're wearing a 0.77

01:04:17.020 little, you know, a

01:04:18.600 security guard outfit or

01:04:21.140 something with, you know, 0.98

01:04:22.720 it's assless or something. 0.99

01:04:24.220 They got like an assless 0.99

01:04:25.240 security guard outfit and 0.92

01:04:26.560 you're running down, you

01:04:27.440 know, chasing a fake

01:04:28.360 criminal or doing, I don't

01:04:30.980 like the knife and the

01:04:31.880 vegetables.

01:04:32.320 I can't get hard to run a

01:04:33.520 knife.

01:04:33.840 So if I see a knife, I'm

01:04:35.740 not getting erect, but 0.68

01:04:37.260 that's me.

01:04:37.800 But some guys, you know,

01:04:39.900 maybe if your husband is,

01:04:41.820 you know, he's from New

01:04:42.820 Jersey or he's part of

01:04:43.860 Native American or

01:04:44.860 whatever, he can handle

01:04:45.820 it.

01:04:46.420 I can't handle that.

01:04:48.240 You know, broken glass and

01:04:49.420 knives, no dicky dicky for

01:04:52.280 daddy.

01:04:53.540 But a lot of men can handle

01:04:54.940 that.

01:04:55.480 But I love this idea of

01:04:56.640 reframing.

01:04:57.380 So, because then here's

01:04:59.440 what's going to happen if a

01:05:00.340 lady tells you that, okay, 0.99

01:05:01.480 let's, I'm going to send you 0.97

01:05:02.560 some pornography. 0.62

01:05:03.900 Now, you know that a, she's 1.00

01:05:05.240 trying to work with you on

01:05:06.080 this problem that you have.

01:05:07.120 If you have a problem, this

01:05:08.600 only for men that have

01:05:09.340 problem.

01:05:09.880 I'm not saying every men

01:05:11.000 have problem.

01:05:13.900 But, but a good way to

01:05:15.880 reframe it.

01:05:16.460 Yeah.

01:05:17.120 It was if your lady wants 0.75

01:05:18.360 to send you something,

01:05:19.920 maybe she's just doing

01:05:20.880 math.

01:05:22.860 You know, maybe she's doing

01:05:23.980 math and she have, you 0.82

01:05:27.340 know, a wife beater on

01:05:29.000 with, you know, and they 0.75

01:05:30.240 got the breasts open areas. 1.00

01:05:31.600 They got rips over their

01:05:32.640 breasts or they got, you 1.00

01:05:34.640 know, maybe she's eating 0.99

01:05:35.440 soup and she got some, you

01:05:38.940 know, and they should get

01:05:39.640 she got a little buddy over

01:05:40.880 there painting her tail 0.98

01:05:41.880 or toenails or something. 0.75

01:05:43.580 She got a gay friend at the 0.97

01:05:44.700 house painting her toenails 0.96

01:05:45.880 and she's having some soup.

01:05:48.700 You know, or if you like a

01:05:49.840 man, if you prefer, you 0.78

01:05:51.080 know, a sex man, then what 0.97

01:05:53.060 you can have then is maybe 0.96

01:05:54.540 your man, you know, he's

01:05:56.580 butt naked and he's chasing 0.81

01:05:57.900 a, um, you know, he's 0.99

01:06:00.360 taking, you know, he's got a

01:06:01.540 little dachshund or a

01:06:02.540 bichon or something and 1.00

01:06:03.980 he's taking that bitch for a 1.00

01:06:05.180 walk or something. 1.00

01:06:06.700 You know, he's taking that

01:06:07.600 beautiful little lovely

01:06:08.760 creature for a snack or

01:06:10.660 something and he's fully

01:06:11.520 nude or he's wearing like a,

01:06:13.000 um, a cooking apron and one

01:06:15.420 of those neck braces or

01:06:16.540 something.

01:06:17.280 There's definitely new ways to

01:06:18.900 say, hey, this is what

01:06:19.900 pornography is now.

01:06:21.660 Let's make it new and

01:06:22.640 exciting.

01:06:23.260 I like that idea.

01:06:24.040 Thank you for that call.

01:06:25.480 Um, let's take another call

01:06:26.520 that was in response to, um,

01:06:28.180 to Cindy from last week.

01:06:29.340 Onward.

01:06:29.600 Hi, this is Jalen from

01:06:31.860 Virginia.

01:06:33.160 I'm actually calling in to

01:06:34.700 respond to Sydney from

01:06:36.800 Oklahoma who was talking

01:06:38.060 about her boyfriend and how

01:06:40.080 she doesn't like him 0.97

01:06:41.140 watching porn. 0.98

01:06:42.360 Yep. 0.91

01:06:42.920 We got that call.

01:06:43.940 Uh, and thank you for your,

01:06:45.280 uh, call, um, onward.

01:06:47.480 I think a good compromise if

01:06:50.260 the reason for you not liking

01:06:52.700 him watching porn, um, is 0.89

01:06:54.580 because you don't like the 0.99

01:06:55.740 idea of him lusting after

01:06:58.020 other women, maybe, um, 1.00

01:07:01.000 instead of making him stop

01:07:02.780 watching porn, maybe you guys 0.98

01:07:04.880 can make porn together. 1.00

01:07:06.840 Maybe send him a couple of 1.00

01:07:09.280 nude pics or, or, or, or 0.99

01:07:11.380 shoot a video or record a 0.60

01:07:13.900 video of you two making love.

01:07:16.300 So, when he does 0.97

01:07:18.160 masturbate, it's, um, he's doing 0.99

01:07:22.140 it to you and, and he's, he's

01:07:24.000 celebrating your body and, and

01:07:26.120 celebrating the love that you two

01:07:28.640 make.

01:07:30.060 That's a nice thought, man.

01:07:31.340 That's beautiful.

01:07:32.320 That's like the Hallmark

01:07:33.660 pornography channel.

01:07:35.820 This guy just sent us in and that

01:07:37.720 makes me feel good.

01:07:39.800 Yeah, do something, make a

01:07:41.640 pornography together.

01:07:43.880 Um, make it a thing you do

01:07:45.380 together somehow.

01:07:48.720 You know, one thing that would be

01:07:49.980 neat about that, if you did that,

01:07:52.200 you know, in a, in a unique way,

01:07:55.760 you're going to take a lot of the

01:07:56.980 power out of that pornography for 0.99

01:07:58.820 him.

01:07:59.520 Because one of the things about

01:08:00.800 pornography where it really hurts

01:08:02.440 men is it becomes something we do

01:08:04.140 by ourself.

01:08:05.440 It becomes this kind of like hidden

01:08:07.380 act.

01:08:07.880 People ain't watching pornography

01:08:09.900 out there, you know, during a

01:08:12.500 soccer game.

01:08:14.320 You know, you're not watching

01:08:16.200 pornography at a, uh, at a

01:08:18.700 fiesta, you know, at a Carl's

01:08:20.580 Jr.

01:08:21.560 Actually, you might at a Carl's

01:08:22.900 Jr.

01:08:23.140 I don't know if you've ever been

01:08:23.640 to a Carl's Jr. at night, but

01:08:25.640 some of the lights don't work

01:08:26.760 inside and people are lonely

01:08:28.300 eating big sandwiches.

01:08:29.800 And I've always said that, that

01:08:32.300 Carl's Jr. is really a mecca for

01:08:34.020 lonely men and big sandwiches.

01:08:35.480 But, um, oh, so if you want to do 0.89

01:08:42.060 pornography together, that yet

01:08:43.400 you're going to take a lot of that

01:08:44.560 power.

01:08:45.020 If you do something with your man

01:08:46.160 together and make it together,

01:08:47.380 ladies, instead of ostracizing your 1.00

01:08:49.600 man, you're going to make it really,

01:08:51.960 really healthy for him.

01:08:52.960 I think you're going to have a

01:08:53.820 chance to make it a new experience

01:08:55.460 for him.

01:08:57.260 And the truth is, man, what we all

01:08:59.140 need in a lot of ways is a new

01:09:00.480 experience with something.

01:09:01.660 Because, man, there's, when you're 0.99

01:09:04.420 a man and you've been masturbating 0.95

01:09:05.780 for, you know, 13 years, nine 0.97

01:09:07.980 years, that's a long, that's a lot

01:09:11.660 of sexual energy that you've just

01:09:14.060 been using by yourself.

01:09:15.820 And you're, you know, you're at

01:09:16.740 home, the wind, you know, you got

01:09:18.400 the windows closed usually, unless

01:09:20.180 you Jamaican or something.

01:09:22.040 I mean, a Jamaican person, they bust 1.00

01:09:23.680 out with the damn windows open. 1.00

01:09:25.840 They'll fire that right out in the 1.00

01:09:27.400 air, a damn seagull will come by and 0.99

01:09:29.120 just, you know, that's lunch. 1.00

01:09:30.920 And that's the lunch bunch.

01:09:34.420 But most people, they close the

01:09:36.300 blinds.

01:09:37.140 It's a lonely thing you do.

01:09:40.620 It's a lonely thing you do.

01:09:43.440 It's something you do by yourself.

01:09:44.600 It's lonesome.

01:09:45.300 It's lonesome activity.

01:09:47.160 It's not an exciting, I mean, it's

01:09:48.360 fun when you're busting and looking.

01:09:50.600 But outside of that, the side

01:09:52.480 effects of it are, and the practice

01:09:55.440 of it is you do it by yourself.

01:09:58.140 You close, it's secret if you do it

01:09:59.680 by yourself.

01:10:00.040 So then it feels like this, you

01:10:01.380 know.

01:10:02.680 But for a woman to then say, hey, 1.00

01:10:04.420 well, let's see, what if we do this

01:10:05.820 together?

01:10:07.420 Ask your man, why do you like this?

01:10:09.440 Make him really think about it.

01:10:11.280 Let him know you're not going to

01:10:12.160 judge him if he answers in an

01:10:14.120 uncomfortable or strange way.

01:10:18.620 And then I think, you know, there

01:10:20.180 could be some progress in that area.

01:10:22.180 And I feel bad that women have to 1.00

01:10:23.780 deal with this, you know, and that

01:10:25.420 men probably are starting to have to 0.82

01:10:26.680 deal with it too.

01:10:27.160 We don't even realize.

01:10:29.040 And some people might think, Theo, 0.54

01:10:30.620 you're crazy talking about pornography 0.84

01:10:31.940 this much, man. 1.00

01:10:33.140 I'm telling you.

01:10:35.900 I'm telling you.

01:10:37.580 We don't know the long-term side

01:10:39.200 effects that this is having on

01:10:40.300 humanity.

01:10:41.700 But I guarantee you they are not

01:10:44.280 decent.

01:10:45.780 Decent.

01:10:46.220 Let's hear another call.

01:10:49.020 Onward.

01:10:49.920 What's up, Theo?

01:10:51.040 My name is Grady.

01:10:52.960 I'm calling in regards to this

01:10:56.180 woman, Cindy, that called in on the 1.00

01:10:57.960 last podcast and was asking questions

01:11:00.880 about her boyfriend and how she can

01:11:02.560 help him.

01:11:04.200 Yep.

01:11:04.680 That's Cindy.

01:11:05.320 All right.

01:11:05.680 Onward.

01:11:06.420 He's struggling with always looking at

01:11:07.940 pornography.

01:11:09.000 He that peaky, peaky guy.

01:11:10.780 And I'm that peaky guy.

01:11:12.360 You know, I'm five days full right

01:11:14.500 now.

01:11:15.520 Bah, bah, beet sheep, have you any

01:11:18.320 wool?

01:11:19.500 Yes, sir.

01:11:20.440 Yes, sir.

01:11:21.480 Five days full.

01:11:23.340 Onward.

01:11:24.260 I just had a book recommendation I

01:11:26.100 really wanted to be able to offer.

01:11:28.200 It's this book I'm reading that's

01:11:29.860 called Unwanted by Jay Stringer.

01:11:33.160 And it's a book about sexual

01:11:34.640 brokenness. 0.58

01:11:35.380 He's a Christian, but I bet even

01:11:37.140 people that aren't Christians would 1.00

01:11:38.420 get a lot out of this book.

01:11:40.620 Okay.

01:11:41.160 That's Unwanted by Jay Stringer.

01:11:43.500 And we'll put the link to that

01:11:44.820 below.

01:11:45.280 We don't work for that book.

01:11:46.660 I don't, I've never, I have not

01:11:47.840 heard of that book, but I support

01:11:49.760 the fact that this man called in and

01:11:51.280 recommended it to it about sexual

01:11:53.700 brokenness.

01:11:56.980 Yeah.

01:11:57.500 And look, this is a tough thing.

01:11:59.160 And look, that's the thing that's

01:12:00.200 going on now.

01:12:01.760 You know, it's not Vember.

01:12:02.840 And so people are, are trying to stay

01:12:06.060 off that bust. 0.99

01:12:08.600 And I'm one of those people.

01:12:11.160 You know, I'm one of those people.

01:12:12.860 Because I want to have those feelings.

01:12:14.260 I want to have that sexual comfort.

01:12:16.160 You know, that, you know. 1.00

01:12:18.240 And be that crazy guy. 0.98

01:12:20.440 You know, I want to be that Horace 0.99

01:12:21.620 Grant.

01:12:23.360 For a lady. 0.85

01:12:25.820 You know, I want to be in the paint

01:12:27.020 doing work.

01:12:27.620 I don't want to be always on the

01:12:28.640 outside just BJ Armstrong and in the

01:12:30.820 distance.

01:12:31.300 You feel me?

01:12:32.460 I want to be that HGZ.

01:12:34.460 I want to have the goggles on and be

01:12:36.260 doing work against the boards, baby.

01:12:40.880 And those are some old Chicago Bulls

01:12:42.760 references.

01:12:45.660 What else is going on?

01:12:47.020 What have I been thinking about?

01:12:48.240 Oh, they have this trail of, not a

01:12:51.160 trail, they have a tribe, I guess you

01:12:53.160 would say, maybe of Hondurans

01:12:54.780 allegedly coming towards the U.S.

01:12:57.100 border.

01:12:57.480 I was thinking about this a lot.

01:12:58.620 Because this is, you know, this is

01:12:59.820 like a new thing that, you know, the

01:13:02.420 media really blasts out and uses as

01:13:05.540 like a scare tactic and a thing, you

01:13:08.580 know.

01:13:08.840 But it's also a real thing that there

01:13:10.320 are real people who are experiencing

01:13:13.320 some sort of trauma or something in

01:13:15.120 their country and they have left their 1.00

01:13:17.400 country and are, you know, caravanning

01:13:19.840 towards the U.S.

01:13:20.900 And it makes me think a lot about, you

01:13:25.920 know, a lot about, I don't know if it's

01:13:30.320 illegal aliens or, you know, you know,

01:13:33.620 immigrants, people coming to the U.S.

01:13:36.200 You know, when I checked out, my father

01:13:37.740 came here legally from Nicaragua in

01:13:40.660 1922, I believe.

01:13:42.540 Um, people have come legally and

01:13:46.520 illegally over the years.

01:13:48.000 We know that.

01:13:49.500 I, I love the idea of having a very

01:13:52.340 legal system for people to get into

01:13:54.760 the country.

01:13:56.560 Um, I love this.

01:13:58.300 I thought about this could be a neat

01:13:59.700 idea that, look, I'm all about

01:14:02.900 strengthening up the borders, making,

01:14:04.620 so you know who's coming in.

01:14:06.680 It's just not safe to not know who is

01:14:09.320 around.

01:14:11.340 You know, it's like a roll call.

01:14:12.860 I wish every year we did a roll call

01:14:14.940 where we just, where everybody had to

01:14:17.480 go next door, their, their exact next 0.99

01:14:19.780 neighbor and find out who in the fuck 0.99

01:14:22.060 they were and do a book report on 1.00

01:14:24.860 their neighbor.

01:14:27.440 Because we don't know who it, you

01:14:29.380 can't keep, you can't run a good

01:14:32.180 company if you don't know the

01:14:35.520 inventory.

01:14:36.320 You can't do it.

01:14:37.120 And here's what I thought though.

01:14:39.840 I thought this is a lot of the issues

01:14:41.500 are, are we mistreating people?

01:14:43.500 Are people being mistreated?

01:14:45.340 You know, there's so many great people

01:14:47.220 in America, in the world.

01:14:50.700 I was thinking we should, the part of

01:14:52.680 the program for having elite people who

01:14:56.460 are not already legal citizens of the

01:14:59.300 U.S.

01:15:00.340 Part of the program could be that there

01:15:04.400 is a, you can sign up to help someone.

01:15:08.520 You can sign up to foster a family, to,

01:15:12.140 okay, I can help two Honduran people can

01:15:14.840 stay at my place for this much time.

01:15:18.220 You know, they can stay here for this

01:15:21.400 much time.

01:15:22.980 I can help for this, you know, they can

01:15:25.780 stay and work with me doing, I feel like

01:15:28.560 there would be a really great program of

01:15:31.800 people that want to help and then people

01:15:34.260 that need help because that's really what

01:15:37.040 you're dealing with.

01:15:38.780 But I think that then you would have an

01:15:40.920 exact account of what's going on.

01:15:42.520 You'd have somebody to help somebody get

01:15:43.660 acclimated into what it's like to be in

01:15:45.560 America or what it's like to live in a

01:15:48.060 new place.

01:15:49.880 And then you solve a lot of that problem.

01:15:53.100 Then you, because otherwise we don't know

01:15:55.540 what it's like for people living right on

01:15:56.940 the border, you know, and suddenly people

01:15:59.760 are in their yards and running and they're

01:16:02.020 starving and scared or thirsty.

01:16:03.980 We, we don't know what that's like if

01:16:05.820 we're not right there, you know, I just

01:16:08.820 feel like we could have a smarter program

01:16:10.760 overall to help people come in.

01:16:16.220 What do I know though?

01:16:17.400 You know, what am I know?

01:16:18.420 I'm just thinking out loud.

01:16:20.560 All right, let's get to another call.

01:16:22.000 Call 985-664-9503.

01:16:25.080 Hey, Theo, this is your boy Chad in Iowa.

01:16:28.360 Hey, Chad in Iowa.

01:16:30.140 And you know, I love Iowa.

01:16:32.720 You know, my heart has been, I've been

01:16:34.340 getting these ideas in my brain and in my

01:16:36.120 heart over the past couple months to do

01:16:38.260 a comedy tour.

01:16:43.100 Like a rural, just middle of nowhere

01:16:45.140 comedy tour.

01:16:45.840 Not middle of nowhere because nowhere is

01:16:48.700 someone's everywhere.

01:16:50.140 You know, nowhere is, is, you know, my

01:16:55.600 nowhere might be, you know, might be

01:16:59.080 your somewhere, you know, your

01:17:02.500 everything.

01:17:03.900 But, but I'm trying to think about how,

01:17:08.420 you know, doing a rural comedy tour.

01:17:11.360 And I mean, just getting out there, boy, 0.97

01:17:13.520 someplace you could fucking smell the 0.96

01:17:15.180 bacon, you know, some people, some, a 0.99

01:17:18.760 place where if you see it, you see

01:17:20.000 somebody eating a couple of, um, you

01:17:23.200 know, you can see somebody having that

01:17:24.400 nightingale egg omelet, you don't look at

01:17:26.780 them sideways.

01:17:29.040 Let's take more.

01:17:29.920 Onward.

01:17:30.540 Not too many of us.

01:17:31.400 Uh, I was just listening to the responses to

01:17:34.500 your pee problem. 0.76

01:17:36.420 Yeah. 0.82

01:17:36.740 You're, uh, uh, uh, you know, shrinking

01:17:39.840 violet there.

01:17:41.340 Oh yeah.

01:17:41.540 And he's talking about when I was having

01:17:42.840 urinary troubles in Phoenix, when I was at

01:17:45.360 the urinate, um, the urinary, urinal and

01:17:49.500 couldn't get that, couldn't get that faucet to 0.94

01:17:54.520 pop.

01:17:54.920 Let's go.

01:17:56.280 Uh, the first, I was glad to hear somebody

01:17:59.460 call with the mathematical thing.

01:18:01.260 That is absolutely true.

01:18:02.480 The part of your brain that controls math

01:18:05.640 also, for some reason, controls your pee,

01:18:09.340 your, your retra or whatever.

01:18:10.880 I don't get it.

01:18:11.620 It's biology, but that is absolutely true.

01:18:14.440 Dude, you don't even have to go through the

01:18:15.720 tables.

01:18:16.140 Just go, what's 67 times three.

01:18:18.400 And even the idea of thinking of that,

01:18:20.880 you're going to be pissing before you know

01:18:23.020 it.

01:18:23.760 Just make up some number.

01:18:25.720 What's 273 plus nine? 0.64

01:18:28.720 Yeah, you're pissing.

01:18:30.480 And there you go.

01:18:31.380 And he's saying a caller had called in and

01:18:32.960 suggested to me that I do math when I'm at

01:18:34.820 the urinal.

01:18:35.420 And apparently that's a real thing then,

01:18:37.220 that if you just start doing math, this

01:18:39.660 gentleman from Iowa is saying that, uh, that

01:18:43.820 if you do math, that part of your brain that

01:18:45.520 does math also, you know, is the year, is

01:18:49.340 the, is the, runs the urinary, the

01:18:51.980 ureth, the urethra.

01:18:54.140 So there you go.

01:18:56.860 You know what I'm saying?

01:18:57.620 If you divide it, they will piss is what

01:19:01.000 I'm saying.

01:19:01.540 And that's full Iowa.

01:19:02.480 I'm talking Dyersville, baby.

01:19:04.340 I'm talking, um, Dyersville.

01:19:07.220 All right.

01:19:07.900 Uh, but so there you go.

01:19:09.100 Try the math.

01:19:09.740 If you are having trouble at the year, at

01:19:11.480 the, at the urinal, you know, other guys

01:19:13.820 around you are grunting and pissing and

01:19:15.740 doing all kinds of stuff, juggling, they're

01:19:18.880 doing it right.

01:19:19.580 They're making fire and you're really

01:19:21.000 standing there just struggling to get

01:19:23.180 your match to flair.

01:19:25.780 Do math.

01:19:27.400 All right.

01:19:27.840 Let's take another call that came in.

01:19:29.240 Onward.

01:19:30.160 Hey, Theo.

01:19:30.880 This is Josh from Sacramento, California.

01:19:33.720 Josh from Sacramento, baby.

01:19:35.560 Sac town.

01:19:36.640 That's the Diaz brothers country, son. 1.00

01:19:38.480 I think, oh, that's Stockton.

01:19:40.360 Sacramento, though.

01:19:42.160 We're a home of missing.

01:19:43.180 Dude, everybody in Sacramento looks like a 0.99

01:19:44.720 missing person, bruh.

01:19:46.100 Beautiful place, man.

01:19:47.240 Also, who that?

01:19:48.300 Shout out to my Saints.

01:19:49.180 I forgot about that.

01:19:50.820 Yeah, man.

01:19:51.120 I love the New Orleans Saints.

01:19:54.540 Onward.

01:19:55.080 I just want to say thanks.

01:19:56.440 I love the podcast.

01:19:58.220 I think every week you always bring

01:20:00.560 something new, something fresh, something

01:20:02.820 funny for all us gang gang members out

01:20:05.560 here.

01:20:05.920 Gang gang, papa.

01:20:08.200 I just finished listening to the episode

01:20:10.580 in November.

01:20:11.620 Wanted to say I think it's awesome that

01:20:13.360 you create a space for all us

01:20:15.580 dudes who have struggled with, you

01:20:17.940 know, blowing loads into our hands

01:20:21.680 and stuff.

01:20:22.960 Ooh, he said it right out like that, man.

01:20:26.320 He said it making that little, you know,

01:20:28.640 that sweet cream like Big Richard used

01:20:30.980 to say he was making back there.

01:20:32.820 And he was a guy who was a convicted

01:20:34.660 pedophile in my area when I was growing

01:20:36.520 up, Big Richard.

01:20:38.140 Homer?

01:20:38.680 On the frequent, I think it's great that

01:20:40.900 you create a space for us so we can

01:20:42.580 help kind of overcome those things

01:20:44.240 together.

01:20:45.220 I'm a recovering nut blower, I guess

01:20:50.360 you could say.

01:20:51.300 Oh, yeah. 1.00

01:20:52.360 You out there fucking blasting pecans, 1.00

01:20:55.500 huh, daddy? 1.00

01:20:58.040 Not in the oral sexual way, but in the 1.00

01:21:00.840 masturbation. 1.00

01:21:02.260 It's okay, man. 1.00

01:21:03.220 Look, hey, bud, if you want to suck a 1.00

01:21:04.500 guy off, you can do it. 1.00

01:21:06.540 You know, it's 2018, man.

01:21:08.120 You can almost, I mean, dude, legally,

01:21:12.040 they just made it legal.

01:21:13.240 You can date a second cousin, first 0.92

01:21:16.240 cousin, there's genetic crossover. 0.90

01:21:20.500 You know, you're going to be double

01:21:21.520 dribbling, you know what I'm saying?

01:21:22.920 You're going to, you know what I'm

01:21:24.740 saying, you're going to have a, you're

01:21:26.640 going to have a baby that can do the

01:21:27.800 three-legged race by himself.

01:21:29.780 But if you want to date a second cousin,

01:21:32.100 man, or polish him off with the insides

01:21:33.760 of your face, you can do it. 0.85

01:21:35.260 Let's hear more.

01:21:35.880 Sense of the term, and just want to

01:21:39.000 say there's hope out there, guys.

01:21:40.420 You just got to stick to it.

01:21:41.800 The best thing that helped me get

01:21:43.320 over that was competition.

01:21:45.920 I saw a documentary where a fighter 0.91

01:21:47.920 wouldn't masturbate before his

01:21:49.260 fights, and he would always win. 0.99

01:21:52.560 There you go.

01:21:53.880 So if you're out there, if you're not

01:21:55.320 winning right now, and you're just out

01:21:56.980 there blowing yourself out every night,

01:21:59.620 come on.

01:22:01.540 Man, there's just, there's more to be

01:22:05.500 done.

01:22:06.120 There's more to be done.

01:22:08.080 But thank you for that call.

01:22:11.180 All right, let's take one more call

01:22:13.540 here, man.

01:22:17.160 Onward.

01:22:17.920 Hey, Theo.

01:22:18.600 So to start this off, I'm not sure if

01:22:20.200 this is a great question for you

01:22:21.920 personally, and I don't mean that in a

01:22:23.300 bad way.

01:22:24.640 Look, I don't take that in a bad way

01:22:26.260 at all, man.

01:22:26.640 I'm just happy that you called.

01:22:27.800 Thank you.

01:22:28.500 I'm just not sure if you have a lot

01:22:30.060 of experience with this.

01:22:31.260 So it might be more of a topic or

01:22:33.780 question for your listeners.

01:22:35.860 So I'm 18.

01:22:37.340 I've been dating this girl for the

01:22:38.700 past six years.

01:22:40.260 Okay.

01:22:40.580 So you started dating when you were

01:22:41.740 12, onward.

01:22:43.500 We've been together since seventh

01:22:44.740 grade.

01:22:45.840 You know, recently she went off to

01:22:48.220 college, and things have been kind of

01:22:50.400 weird since then.

01:22:51.200 And I think she's getting to the

01:22:53.080 point now where she wants to break 0.97

01:22:55.060 up.

01:22:55.640 And, you know, I just kind of wanted

01:22:56.480 your advice on that.

01:22:58.280 I mean, she's helped me through

01:23:00.480 addiction.

01:23:01.260 She's helped me through my parents'

01:23:03.740 divorce, depression.

01:23:06.600 You name it, she's been there.

01:23:08.520 And, you know, like I said, I think

01:23:10.840 she wants to break up now. 1.00

01:23:12.760 And I was really hoping that, you

01:23:15.380 know, Thanksgiving break is coming

01:23:16.400 up, and I was hoping that she would

01:23:18.300 want to spend that time together and

01:23:20.160 try to work things out more.

01:23:21.920 I'm not sure if that's going to

01:23:22.780 happen.

01:23:23.960 So, you know, man, I just love her,

01:23:26.660 and I'm really scared of what's going

01:23:28.520 to happen, I guess.

01:23:30.080 So my questions are, how do people

01:23:32.380 deal with a long-distance

01:23:34.300 relationship?

01:23:35.420 And then, also, if it does come down

01:23:37.760 to breaking up, how do people deal

01:23:40.900 with such a big breakup?

01:23:43.460 Because, you know, for me, it's almost

01:23:45.160 a third of my life that we've been

01:23:46.200 together.

01:23:46.500 She's just always been there.

01:23:48.760 She means absolutely everything to

01:23:50.520 me.

01:23:53.660 See, I don't know, man.

01:23:55.040 I'm sorry if this is a little

01:23:56.380 confusing.

01:23:58.060 It's kind of hard to keep a thought.

01:24:01.620 But, yeah, any advice that you can

01:24:03.400 give that'd be awesome?

01:24:04.640 Same with your listeners.

01:24:05.300 Excuse me there.

01:24:10.920 Thank you for the call, man.

01:24:12.120 No, I think this was, you know, this

01:24:14.920 is exactly what I wanted to, you know,

01:24:17.120 I'm glad you called.

01:24:18.620 Yeah, because I don't want you having

01:24:19.600 to just think about this stuff by

01:24:20.960 yourself and get too swarmed up.

01:24:23.380 Man, I can relate to this.

01:24:25.760 You know, I had an experience when I

01:24:27.160 was in, right when I got out of,

01:24:31.040 when I got into, you know, right around

01:24:34.040 that high school, college time.

01:24:37.100 I was dating a girl, and it was long

01:24:39.840 distance, and she, you know, she was 0.97

01:24:43.280 ready to really kind of explore the

01:24:46.720 world in a lot of ways and meet new

01:24:49.740 people.

01:24:50.660 And, you know, sometimes as young men,

01:24:52.920 we put a lot of that on, like, you

01:24:55.140 know, for me anyway, I just, all I could

01:24:57.520 think about was her having, hooking up 0.99

01:24:58.760 with other guys, her hooking up with

01:25:00.140 other guys.

01:25:02.540 But really, the truth was, she just

01:25:03.920 needed to kind of be free, you know,

01:25:07.220 and, and I was heartbroken, man.

01:25:10.480 I was just heartbroken.

01:25:12.160 I mean, I remember I laid in a street

01:25:13.620 in my neighborhood.

01:25:14.500 Man, it wasn't even my neighborhood.

01:25:16.140 I just laid in the street somewhere,

01:25:18.800 and I was smoking menthol cigarettes,

01:25:23.040 you know, because they had a lot of

01:25:24.640 brothers around me blowing out all the

01:25:26.780 time.

01:25:27.100 And I was, you know, doing menthols,

01:25:29.200 and I wanted to just, you know, and

01:25:31.340 they were a lot of, at the time, a lot

01:25:32.760 of black men were struggling in

01:25:34.080 America.

01:25:34.700 So I just wanted to just emulate any

01:25:37.200 struggle, you know.

01:25:38.660 I just wanted to just, you know, every

01:25:40.880 hit I took off of that menthol cigarette,

01:25:43.220 I just, that was my amistad, you know.

01:25:45.140 I just wanted to just, I don't know, I

01:25:48.260 wanted to burn my insides up because

01:25:50.400 she wanted to move on, and I wanted to

01:25:52.920 kind of stay.

01:25:54.240 I wanted to stay where everything was.

01:25:55.800 And the truth was, I mean, yeah, I was

01:25:57.880 in, I was really in love with her at

01:25:59.400 the time, but also I was just afraid of

01:26:00.900 change.

01:26:02.080 You know, I was so scared of change.

01:26:07.820 But it sounds like, man, you know, this

01:26:09.180 is somebody you've really cared about, and

01:26:11.060 you said that she was there for some

01:26:12.280 really important times in your life.

01:26:16.580 And sometimes, you know, someone's in

01:26:18.720 our life for a certain amount of time

01:26:20.080 for, just for really important things.

01:26:22.260 You know, and it's kind of great that

01:26:24.760 you've had her for these moments.

01:26:26.680 You know, she sounds like a neat person.

01:26:28.360 I don't even know her, but I can just

01:26:29.540 feel it.

01:26:30.720 You know, in the bass, in the baritones,

01:26:33.180 in the back, you know, in the back strap

01:26:35.280 of your vocals, I can hear it.

01:26:37.340 In the rear instruments, you know.

01:26:40.080 I can hear that she's probably a decent

01:26:41.720 person.

01:26:42.940 And here's the thing, man.

01:26:44.580 You're going to have other chances with

01:26:46.120 her.

01:26:46.340 It's going to be hard, though.

01:26:48.780 It's going to be hard.

01:26:50.320 You have to stay busy.

01:26:53.420 Your mind is going to be your worst

01:26:55.040 enemy if you really start to miss her.

01:26:58.260 You know, when you're not less than,

01:26:59.780 because she wants, she's just at a

01:27:01.260 moment in her life where that's going

01:27:02.440 to happen.

01:27:04.380 You know, there's a setting free of

01:27:06.700 the, you know, there's this freedom

01:27:08.140 that comes when someone goes off to

01:27:09.560 college, and that mindset, and

01:27:11.260 you have to find yourself now.

01:27:16.140 You have to find out who you are.

01:27:19.500 You know, somewhat separate from her.

01:27:22.480 And it's going to take effort, man.

01:27:24.340 I hate to tell you that, because I know

01:27:25.580 it's probably going to be hard sometimes

01:27:26.940 to, you know, stay motivated or stay

01:27:29.020 moving if you get those thoughts in

01:27:30.680 your head that she doesn't care, she's 0.94

01:27:33.120 not thinking about you, or she's dating

01:27:35.640 or doing other things.

01:27:37.680 But you can do it.

01:27:39.640 You know, you can make better choices

01:27:40.980 than just laying in the street and

01:27:42.180 smoking cigarettes.

01:27:43.940 You know, if I could go back in time,

01:27:45.200 I'd have spent more time with my

01:27:46.140 friends.

01:27:47.220 I would have used that time to try and

01:27:48.580 be brave and even just go on dates.

01:27:53.700 But there's a great chance, it's hard

01:27:55.600 to see this when you're young, and I'm

01:27:56.800 not preaching at you, but it's hard to

01:27:58.640 see how many more opportunities you may

01:28:00.480 have to date or to be in love or to

01:28:03.960 have an experience with someone that

01:28:05.720 you met when you were younger.

01:28:07.520 Yeah, but it sounds like, man, you

01:28:11.740 guys have something really special.

01:28:13.060 Six years, you've only been alive for

01:28:14.460 18, and for six years you guys have

01:28:16.600 had each other in your lives.

01:28:17.900 That's a long time.

01:28:20.360 You know, and maybe something that can

01:28:21.620 help is to, like, kind of pray for her.

01:28:23.660 And I'm not saying that, you know, like

01:28:25.540 in a Christian way, but just, you know,

01:28:28.500 to think about her and wish the best for

01:28:30.360 her.

01:28:30.660 You know, my father used to pray for his

01:28:35.440 enemies all the time.

01:28:37.680 And eventually, even though they never

01:28:40.000 knew it, he cared about them because

01:28:42.240 there's something inside of us where if

01:28:44.540 we kind of wish for something or hope

01:28:46.560 for something enough or pray for

01:28:48.100 something enough to do well, then we

01:28:51.120 start to want to, we kind of support it

01:28:52.960 instead of dislike it, you know.

01:28:55.080 So, just praying for her to be happy.

01:29:00.140 And, you know, and eventually her being

01:29:02.080 happy could bring her back your way. 0.92

01:29:04.100 Well, you have another opportunity.

01:29:06.420 And look, man, I'll tell you this.

01:29:07.720 I was in love with a girl, and she came

01:29:10.440 back around years later.

01:29:13.020 And, dude, I'm glad we didn't end up

01:29:17.480 together.

01:29:17.900 She's a great girl, but years later she

01:29:20.400 wasn't the same.

01:29:21.900 You know, the girl you love right now,

01:29:23.460 10 years from now, she could be doing

01:29:25.000 gambling, you know, she could be 1.00

01:29:27.620 stealing, she could be real, real 1.00

01:29:30.760 chatty.

01:29:33.360 You don't want to be a lifelong

01:29:34.680 listener, brother.

01:29:36.680 You end up with a real chatty Cathy,

01:29:39.060 and they have a couple, you know, some

01:29:41.080 cinnamon certs, or they have some

01:29:42.680 Skittles or something.

01:29:43.900 It's hard to listen to all of it.

01:29:47.100 So, you don't want, you know, you don't

01:29:49.480 know who she is really yet.

01:29:51.800 And this is a chance for you.

01:29:53.180 It's going to be, this is going to be a

01:29:54.300 really good chance for you.

01:29:58.140 So, I would just, I would think and try

01:29:59.940 and wish the best for her, even when

01:30:01.260 there's moments you don't want to.

01:30:03.280 You know, man, I want her to do well.

01:30:04.920 I want her to be happy.

01:30:06.260 I want her to have new experiences and

01:30:08.000 learn and, and find, have some joy in

01:30:11.560 her life.

01:30:13.640 You know, and I think that can help you.

01:30:15.620 You do that for a couple weeks, man, it

01:30:16.840 could help you get through some of that

01:30:18.080 because then you're going to be more

01:30:19.160 supporting.

01:30:19.720 Part of you is going to want to support

01:30:21.840 her

01:30:22.200 instead of

01:30:24.860 not want to.

01:30:26.940 Because we have this thing inside of us.

01:30:28.280 If we cheer for something,

01:30:29.780 even if we hate it, eventually

01:30:31.200 we'll start to kind of actually want it

01:30:33.880 to do well.

01:30:36.460 And then that's such a much better place

01:30:38.460 to be for us because now instead of

01:30:40.320 the feelings of hating something or

01:30:42.080 disliking an experience,

01:30:44.020 now we're like,

01:30:45.060 we're cheering it on.

01:30:46.500 Um, but also those are just my

01:30:50.580 thoughts, man, and what do I know?

01:30:52.740 You know, I'm just a struggling man in

01:30:54.740 his 30s that's, you know, only got five

01:30:57.480 days off of his own ball bag.

01:30:59.540 So, who knows?

01:31:01.800 But I do know that I'm grateful to be

01:31:03.480 back here from Utah today and I'm happy

01:31:06.000 to be here with you guys and to be part

01:31:08.040 of this past weekend and have this

01:31:09.600 experience.

01:31:11.340 And, uh, and that's it, man.

01:31:14.540 You know, we can get out of here.

01:31:16.140 We can go off in our week.

01:31:18.160 The holidays are coming up.

01:31:20.000 It's going to come so fast.

01:31:21.540 Guys, it's two weeks until

01:31:22.940 Thanksgiving's or something like that

01:31:25.280 or two and two days or something.

01:31:27.440 Start it now.

01:31:29.340 Don't wait. 0.99

01:31:30.420 Wish happy holidays right fucking 0.99

01:31:32.580 now, boy. 1.00

01:31:34.380 I'll start wishing people that shit 1.00

01:31:35.820 right after Mardi Gras. 1.00

01:31:37.860 Dude, I'll be at a funeral right after

01:31:39.500 Mardi Gras.

01:31:39.820 I'll be at a funeral in June and be

01:31:41.460 like, happy holidays, you know?

01:31:43.360 I'll be hanging mistletoe up outside 0.99

01:31:47.140 of at a damn wake. 0.99

01:31:49.480 You know, that's where I'm at. 0.99

01:31:52.560 So, it's a great time.

01:31:53.860 Don't let anybody make you feel bad

01:31:55.200 for being in the season, for having

01:31:56.660 that feeling.

01:31:58.820 Don't let anybody, you know, look at

01:32:00.380 you being joyous

01:32:02.040 and make you feel ashamed of any of

01:32:05.700 your joy.

01:32:06.240 Keep your chestnuts off the open fire.

01:32:12.020 Some of you guys, I don't know how

01:32:13.140 many people have been busting out

01:32:14.560 down there, but hold the line, you

01:32:16.280 know, you can do it.

01:32:18.080 And be good to yourselves, man.

01:32:20.660 Because you probably deserve it.

01:32:21.840 And I'm going to try to be good to

01:32:22.660 myself, you know?

01:32:25.740 We can do it.

01:32:26.620 We can do it.

01:32:31.140 Let's head out with this song,

01:32:33.760 actually.

01:32:34.160 I just thought of this one.

01:32:35.340 I love this song.

01:32:37.940 And this is...

01:32:41.740 Let's head out with this song.

01:32:51.940 Here we go.

01:32:57.680 We got this.

01:33:00.420 Come on.

01:33:01.560 Come on.

01:33:04.160 I ain't seen home in about a hundred

01:33:08.100 days.

01:33:08.780 I can almost hear mama pray for my

01:33:12.280 restless soul.

01:33:13.860 Take care of yourselves.

01:33:15.780 And I ain't made a dollar I ain't

01:33:18.260 spent, but where it's going ain't

01:33:20.340 killed me yet.

01:33:21.880 I still get where I'm bound to go.

01:33:24.980 Hug somebody, baby. 0.98

01:33:26.020 Hit somebody with that hand full of 0.99

01:33:47.100 cinnamon. 0.98

01:33:47.760 You feel me?

01:33:48.260 You want to be in love with somebody?

01:33:54.920 Let somebody eat cinnamon out of the

01:33:56.120 palm of your hand. 0.71

01:33:57.880 You want to talk about pornography? 0.97

01:33:59.460 That's what I'm talking about. 0.99

01:34:00.420 Hit them with that old cinnamon 0.85

01:34:01.380 Wilson. 0.97

01:34:01.980 You feel me?

01:34:02.600 Come on.

01:34:03.000 I don't know why.

01:34:05.140 You want to do the new pornography?

01:34:07.800 Reshape it.

01:34:09.000 Put it into your relationship,

01:34:10.520 into your marriage,

01:34:11.400 however you want.

01:34:12.380 Change the game.

01:34:15.500 These are old templates we're running

01:34:17.120 on.

01:34:18.100 This is somebody else invented this 1.00

01:34:19.680 bullshit and we're letting it live in 1.00

01:34:21.220 ours, in our heads, in our hearts, 1.00

01:34:23.360 in our lives.

01:34:24.740 Come on, man.

01:34:26.400 Get that cinnamon Wilson, man.

01:34:28.240 Old school.

01:34:29.600 You want to show a lady a good time, 0.68

01:34:31.200 put a little bit of cinnamon, you know,

01:34:32.740 in this hand, you know.

01:34:34.160 Be that front open palm.

01:34:35.460 She knows what's coming at her right

01:34:37.000 there.

01:34:37.840 Little handful of cinnamon.

01:34:39.940 You let a baby gal lick some cinnamon 1.00

01:34:42.720 off your fucking palms, boy. 1.00

01:34:44.540 Come on. 1.00

01:34:45.900 Then you hit her with that hidden fistful 0.94

01:34:47.640 of coriander on the other side.

01:34:50.440 And now, suddenly things is getting sweet.

01:34:54.920 And it helps where I'm headed then.

01:35:00.320 I'm making good tonight.

01:35:09.000 This is Makin' It by Bishop Gunn.

01:35:19.540 You know what?

01:35:25.620 We'll stay with it.

01:35:27.220 He's going to switch out.

01:35:28.140 If this bottle was an hourglass,

01:35:32.120 I'd say that I'm about an hour past the minute.

01:35:36.560 I should have put it down.

01:35:42.680 But I'm makin' it.

01:35:44.880 Actually, you know what?

01:35:46.220 I'm makin' wrongs feel right.

01:35:51.600 I'm makin' it.

01:35:53.080 We'll stay.

01:35:53.700 And if hell the way I'm headed then,

01:35:56.280 I'm makin' good time.

01:36:03.540 We stuck with it, and look, it's pickin' up.

01:36:05.900 You see?

01:36:06.680 We stuck with it.

01:36:08.260 And things are pickin' up.

01:36:10.880 The luz that I've crossed.

01:36:19.820 It sits out.

01:36:23.700 Yeah.

01:36:24.060 Yeah.

01:36:24.440 Yeah.

01:36:25.440 Yeah.

01:36:26.420 Yeah.

01:36:27.360 Yeah.

01:36:27.540 Between the lines that I've crossed.

01:36:40.360 And the friends that I've lost

01:36:43.400 I'm left here alone in my skin

01:36:47.840 Alone in my skin

01:36:49.520 But I'm in pretty good shape

01:36:54.420 For the shape that I mean

01:36:57.320 That's it

01:36:58.580 I'm making it

01:37:00.740 I'm making it

01:37:03.860 I'm making it wrong

01:37:06.600 Feel right

01:37:09.120 And I'm making it

01:37:12.360 I'm making it

01:37:16.000 I'm making it

01:37:17.760 I'm making it

01:37:18.180 I'm making it

01:37:20.300 I'm making it

01:37:24.400 I'm making it

01:37:27.180 I'm making it long

01:37:29.900 Feel right

01:37:32.680 I'm making it

01:37:35.940 And it feels well

01:37:37.700 I'm making good times

01:37:42.280 Making good times, man.

01:37:57.840 I ain't seen home in about a hundred days

01:38:02.540 I can almost hear mama pray

01:38:05.460 For my restless soul

01:38:08.580 That is Making It by Bishop Gunn.

01:38:20.840 Man, I've been riding their music for a long time now.

01:38:23.980 But it helped me get through a lot of this year in certain moments,

01:38:26.220 and this is one of them.

01:38:28.060 You know, making wrongs feel right.

01:38:31.320 You know, we're figuring it out.

01:38:33.100 You guys be good to yourselves.

01:38:34.300 You probably deserve it.

01:38:35.900 I'll see you next, next time.

01:38:39.920 Thank you.

01:38:40.380 Ladies and gentlemen, I'm Jonathan Kite, and welcome to Kite Club,

01:38:45.160 a podcast where I'll be sharing thoughts on things like current events,

01:38:48.840 stand-up stories, and seven ways to pleasure your partner.

01:38:52.560 The answer may shock you.

01:38:54.300 Sometimes I'll interview my friends.

01:38:56.360 Sometimes I won't.

01:38:57.940 And as always, I'll be joined by the voices in my head.

01:39:00.720 You have three new voice messages.

01:39:03.600 A lot of people are talking about Kite Club.

01:39:06.620 I've been talking about Kite Club for so long, longer than anybody else.

01:39:11.040 So great.

01:39:11.840 Hey, sweetheart. 1.00

01:39:14.220 Here's the deal. 1.00

01:39:15.500 Anyone who doesn't listen to Kite Club is a dodgy bloody wanker. 0.99

01:39:19.460 Do you know what I mean? 0.99

01:39:20.780 Hi.

01:39:21.620 I'll take a quarter pounder with cheese and a McFlurry.

01:39:24.520 Sorry, sir, but our ice cream machine is broken.

01:39:26.640 Oh, no.

01:39:28.160 I think Tom Hanks just butt-dialed me.

01:39:31.180 Anyway, first rule of Kite Club is, tell everyone about Kite Club.

01:39:35.520 Second rule of Kite Club is, tell everyone about Kite Club.

01:39:39.740 Third rule, like and subscribe wherever you listen to podcasts,

01:39:43.380 or watch us on YouTube, yeah?

01:39:45.500 And yes, don't worry, my Brad Pitt impression will get better.

This Past Weekend with Theo Von - November 12, 2018

Cinnamon Wilson ｜ This Past Weekend #147

Episode Stats

Summary

Transcript