E288 Tim Dillon 2
Episode Stats
Length
1 hour and 42 minutes
Words per Minute
199.15584
Summary
Comedian Tim Dillon joins Jemele to discuss how to deal with the stress of social media, his love of Taco Bell, and the perils of sleeping on the couch. He also talks about his new mattress, and why he doesn t like it.
Transcript
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Now, today's guest is a host of the Tim Dillon Show.
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He's one of my favorites to follow on social media,
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He will reconfigure any stress that is caused to you by social media.
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He is a comedian or a comedian, and he is a man,
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Your tweets are some of the best things that I even,
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it's like literally I'll be just lying on my sofa.
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Whatever you lay on for more than a few months is just destroyed.
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Yeah, it just becomes like, it just becomes, you know,
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And what do you, is there a way to re-fluff them?
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So that you get about a year before you've destroyed it.
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This is the closest that I could get to trying to like kind of imitate you.
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And it was, when this is all over the dollar, we'll be worth nothing.
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Then you play into the whole like anarchy of it.
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But every now and then I'm an impulsive person.
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I just don't have a lot of control over what happens.
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So the problem is like I've gotten to Twitter wars with like the CEO of Red Mango, frozen
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And I just, I'll be laying there realizing I'm attacking the CEO of Red Mango for no reason.
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I just, I just, there are some times when I, I'll tweet something and I hit send.
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And a lot of times I go, nah, shouldn't have done that.
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It's almost like you've just gone so AWOL that it's like inspiring.
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It's like, oh, this is what it's supposed to be.
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A not real field that like news sources cite from.
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Like TikTok, like what's interesting about TikTok, which I'm not on, but like what's interesting
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about it is it's just like people dancing, people being silly.
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There's money to be made, but it's like that, even though it's kind of crazy, it makes a
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lot more sense to me than like the social media on Facebook where people have a 300 comment,
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They're arguing with their uncle about something.
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And I'm like, no, this probably wasn't what it was meant to be.
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Like somebody's dancing or a crazy, like, so it feels like maybe social media is kind
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Well, I feel like you're, you're kind of leading it back.
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I mean, that's what I feel like when I, I'm like, oh, this is what I need to recognize
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is that I, is that it's like, you're like leading it back to that place of ridiculousness.
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Have you seen this floating cinema in Los Angeles with socially distanced boats?
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How much work is it going to take to do all that?
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Now to see a movie, we're all like, just stay home.
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If that's the other option, I'll just stay home.
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I don't want to get in a boat to go watch fucking Avengers.
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Someone would get out of their boat to go pee and drown.
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I mean, it's just, we're going so crazy with this where we're like inventing things that
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Let's just go to a movie theater in the ocean with socially distanced boats.
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I would almost rather get the disease and die and go to heaven.
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Be reincarnated and still not get in a boat to see a movie.
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It's almost, God, it's so fucking ridiculous, man.
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I'm definitely going to have to go with my girlfriend.
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See, a lot of guys, and Nick is a very susceptible man.
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But yes, he's the kind of guy, you know, he's very Japanese.
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Like if there's a puddle, he'll stab himself and bleed out.
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Because chicks are going to want to go to this.
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And now with everything going on, every time I see a new idea like this, I go, how do
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Like every new idea, I'm like, how easy is that to just light that up?
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Or what about when the angry, like what about if the gay fleet from, what's that Disney
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World ride with a lot of, like that Disney World ride.
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What about when the gay, because it's a lot of young gay men and women that work there.
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If Pirates of the Caribbean disgruntled people attack that, that would be the only reason
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Just so it could get invaded and attacked by angry gay Pirates of the Caribbean.
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Because you got to be angry that that's your gig.
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Now, what about, I saw recently, but yeah, if you don't follow Tim Dillon, what is your
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It is, it's like this weird canal through all of the bullshit that is, some moments it's
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And, but just, you have to stick with it, man, because you have to believe, like I was
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But the, the running joke is that this cat is a, uh, is a, is a, is like a, um, uh,
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And, uh, he's, he constantly threatens like Nancy Pelosi and he's constantly, like they
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constantly keep putting him in jail and he keeps claiming that they're jokes.
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So I just keep putting them up and then like people will comment, like some guy will be
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And then some personal comment under that, like, why are you talking shit about a cat's
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I just go over and I grab him and they Photoshop him in these pictures.
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So they just Photoshop him in the like, so like, yeah, it's just, oh, do the Brad Pitt
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And he's so like, he's almost so you, like he's there, he's disinterested, but he's also
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willing to just like get wild in a moment's notice.
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I mean, that's kind of what he's about, but that's what I, that's how I use Twitter
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is just like, um, to just kind of be, sometimes I make a good point, but most of the time
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And most of the time it's just me being ridiculous.
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But you're so, what I, what I like, I guess is you, you're fearless about it.
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Like something happened to me where I got, I guess, I don't know if I got fearful or
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I just, I think sometimes I get too, like I'm, I'm too real about stuff sometimes.
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So it's like, I'm going to just end up like just in a bad space.
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You know, I'm going to end up fighting with Jamili Hill, you know?
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I look at it as like, if, if I said something and then Jamili Hill said something to me,
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you win, I would tweet her to photo of the cat.
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Like I would be like, it's like, Oh, if you want to come into this world, right.
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If you want to take this Willy Wonka boat ride through the craziness, because I'm like,
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this is not a good place to have a conversation.
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And anyone should know that everybody should know that.
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And everyone should treat it accordingly and just be ridiculous.
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People are trying to hustle and make money and whatever.
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But I'm like, if you get mad at me, I mean, I put a Meghan McCain wig on, I dress up like
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And it's like, if you get mad at that guy, you're, you're, you're at fault.
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What, um, what about the Hollywood sign getting taken down?
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Cause obviously, you know, there's a lot of been a lot of stuff.
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People taking down monuments, you know, Confederate flag people taking down, you know, I think
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the Cleveland Indians just announced today they're going to change their name.
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If you can, I know you only have two hands, but, uh, but I thought about, so then part
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of me, like, cause I get a little bit angry sometimes about like, cause Confederate flag,
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And that's your, like, you have a whole different understanding of it because you're a Southern
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Like now if somebody rode by with a, like if somebody yelled the N word and was waving
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If that's a bad guy, wrong, but, but I just start to worry just when does it end, you
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Like when does it, well, yeah, I think a lot of people think that because a lot of people
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are like at a certain point, if you go through history, Oh yeah.
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So do you just, I mean, every movie, everything.
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And then you start burning books and then you start, you're just heading that stage.
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You're like, I don't really care about Confederate monuments, but it's like, then it's like,
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well, let's get rid of, uh, you know, Washington, Lincoln.
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And the other question nobody asks, what do you replace that with?
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Like even like the university, George Washington university, right?
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Like they've been thinking like, okay, do we have to change?
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There's been like, yeah, they just change it to GW and nobody is enough.
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It's like KFC when they were like, not using chicken.
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You're like, yeah, but what does that C stand for?
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It's just like, I can't imagine that anyone really cares.
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Cause we grew up going, like we would go from Mardi Gras.
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We would go by the, um, we would go by the, everybody would meet at the Robert E.
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We had a little bit of like, I guess maybe Mexican or Chinese, like kind of like one person
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We had a group called Wham whites against Mexicans.
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So they would always, was that a musical group?
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Just like a budget Antifa, you know, like Antifa, but that had to be home by 6 PM for dinner.
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And, um, and then they like kind of attacked the Chinese, like semi Chinese kid once.
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Like there was no real follow through, you know, but.
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Oh, my brother was like, it's the best we're going to do.
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We just gotta, we gotta show people we're about it and there's no Mexicans around, but this
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Look, God, we drew it on our binders during lunch.
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So then I start to think, okay, well, yeah, you tear it down.
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But then here's what I start to worry about is say in certain, uh, in certain cities and
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whether they'd be Southern really or anywhere, cause some of it starts to branch out now to
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like, oh, well, Thomas Jefferson had slaves and this person dated a black woman who was
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underage and just different things where it just keeps escalating.
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And it's like, when does it like at a certain point, um, yeah, like you're saying it's going
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to hit everybody, but then the people who live in those places who associate with that
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history and don't associate it with it racially.
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Like, and I know this is just a white perspective, but those people are going to be like, I'm
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not, I don't want to live in a place where now the street that I'm on has been changed.
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Like, it's also like, why are we ignoring history?
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Why not look at a statue and go, yeah, that guy did some fuck.
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Number one, like the idea that every statue, it doesn't mean that I never look at a statue
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I never have ever looked at a statue and went, I should think like him.
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I look at a statue and go, that guy did something, maybe good, maybe very bad.
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He might've been very bad, but it was significant.
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He kind of, Hey, like the people are 50, 50 on if he's really that helpful to a team.
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You know, but I, I've never looked at a statue.
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We're telling them, Oh, if you walk by a statue, you're going to automatically look
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You know, they go, let's take down the Christopher Columbus statue in the middle of Columbus
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So the idea that like Columbus, uh, it's a bunch, you know, Columbus is reinforcing
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Well, then it's like, should you take down like, cause there's, you know, a lot of artwork
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and I'm, I don't know if there's monuments, but of like slave, probably like arriving
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in like Charleston, like slave ships and stuff that did.
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So then it's like, well, if you're a white person, you don't want to remember that all
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So it's like, but you should have to look at it.
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Like you have those monuments and you're like, I can't forget this history.
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But if I, I feel like if you're going to apply, apply it to everything, it's just like,
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you know, because some people might think, man, I didn't do this.
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Why do I have to be reminded of it all the time?
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But yeah, because that's applying the same psychology.
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I feel like to the ones where you're applying it to, you know, like George Washington or
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Robert E. Lee, you know, like, or just put on Robert E. Lee's thing.
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Or yeah, I think it's the people that really are advocating that they take down everything
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are people that just want to completely remake or reimagine America.
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They start with like the statues and everything.
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And it's like, we can all agree that America has some deep, deep flaws.
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But I don't think anybody's or a lot of people are not going to be on board for the new version
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Nobody wants that where you don't have any freedom.
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And I think that's what this kind of America that they envision is an America where everybody
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is constantly policing themselves and their speech.
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And you're being their surveillance of everything you write and say.
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Like I remember when Corona started, people were like, yo, go, go, go call this number
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I'm supposed to call a number and be like, yeah, I see a kid without a mask.
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I just, that to me, that whole world is not, I don't like that world.
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I'd rather live in the world with some of the problems than this Orwellian nightmarish
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world where like people are like, I can't say anything.
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I'm afraid to meet somebody at this corner because both of the people it's named after
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Because then it's just people wandering around unable to meet at certain intersections
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Or the weird guy who will only meet in front of the Robert E. Lee statue.
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We always meet in front of a Confederate monument.
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Or maybe like you add to the, now I think that would be even a better idea.
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Do a Harriet Tubman sitting on the front of the horse.
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I think it's like in the absence of real solutions, people are like, hey, let's just take the
00:19:04.800
You know, it's like, how about stopping police shooting black people?
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How about stopping some of the issues in Hollywood, people getting abused or whatever?
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But see, that's where it's like, that to me would really make Hollywood, I think, if you
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Then Hollywood is going to be like, well, what do we have then?
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What is the movement to take the Hollywood sign down?
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Go back to the Indiana governor says all people over the age of eight will face.
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Indiana governor says all people over the age of eight will face a face mask mandate.
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There are some nine-year-olds that are going to get thrown into paddy wagons and that's
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I love kids learning about government at nine, you know, being like, oh, I lose my freedoms
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How are they going to develop their, their world?
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I'm all for like, yeah, wear the mask, keep people safe, whatever.
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But I just think there's something hilarious about the, like this weird age of like eight.
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It's like, if you're nine, you better have your shit together.
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The Hollywood sign, it says right here, the Hollywood sign has been through some stuff.
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These are people that are on the right that are going, if you're going to take down Jefferson
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Washington, we're going to take down a Hollywood sign.
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And that's when you start to look, because that's what I feel like it's like, you have
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If you are on the right or if you are, it's like, well, what about the, the, you know,
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So what about all the shit that goes on in Hollywood?
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Um, but the whole thing is like I, when Jenny Slate, uh, apologized for doing the voice
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I did this whole thing on my podcast as a joke where I was like, it's not enough that
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she's stepping down because her apology is very creepy, right?
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People, I was like, why, why does she, Jenny Slate from everything I know about her is probably
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Like she felt she had to come out and give this big explanation.
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So I just said, you know, to counter the insanity of that, I said, that's not enough.
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And that's the whole thing because I said, it's not enough.
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So this is what you kind of do when people go woke.
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And what that's supposed to do is make people go, oh yeah, this is stupid.
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But as a matter of fact, you get people on Twitter going, I don't think she should go to jail.
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And then some people go, maybe like a re-education.
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They're like, yeah, maybe like some type of re-education or something, but not jail.
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Next thing you know, she has to take 40 hours of student driving from an African-American instructor.
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What's great is like, I'm like, oh, you're almost there.
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That's what you see when you tweet something crazy and the responses are like, yeah, that
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I tweeted the other day and I said, I walked into a grocery store and they told me to wear
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And then I ran around the store called this screaming.
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And a lot of people on Twitter were like, good for you, man.
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I wish I could have seen that like dead serious.
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I'm like, yeah, I was, I didn't do any of that.
00:24:00.040
Well, people are looking also for anything that's against the norm.
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So that's another reason why I think a lot of what you say really kind of stands out like
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a lot of times because it's like, also, I think you're finding like a seam of humor in
00:24:12.660
this where sometimes I forget to like, just be light about like, just like joke around about
00:24:18.880
Well, cause like you watch these shows now that are like, you know, Ellen and Fallon,
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Like Jimmy Kimmel's in his living room and you're like, what's going on?
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And then they're interviewing people and they're interviewing celebrities and they're talking
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Like it's so disconnected from the reality that I think people just want anybody, whether
00:24:46.320
To talk about something that's actually going on.
00:24:56.180
Do you think that, uh, would this be a tough time?
00:25:00.520
You think like, cause you're a, you're a gay man, right?
00:25:19.360
I'd love to use, but this is, uh, yeah, we've been praying you'll make it back.
00:25:26.160
If Hollywood offers me enough money, I'll do it.
00:25:31.540
That's a better life is to have like a fake wife.
00:25:46.260
Like you and the wife wake up every day and you're like, all right, let's go fuck the
00:25:57.060
You're like CIA agents, you know, and you just got to go out there and like, Hey, we got
00:26:11.220
Do you ever think that there, do you ever meet women that are close on a, like there's
00:26:16.540
almost like a, cause sometimes I almost wonder if at a certain point that gay and straight
00:26:21.320
will almost be primitive descriptions of people.
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Like I know some of, there's a lot of forced stuff and like, you know, and people like
00:26:29.080
in this place now where they don't know or they, you know, and people are just.
00:26:49.700
Uh, but you, you realize how sexual a lot of these relationships are.
00:26:53.320
You're like, a lot of this is probably just people that have massive anxiety laying next
00:26:58.080
to each other, having multiple panic attacks, and then someone's strong enough to go make
00:27:05.680
But if you ever come during a tough panic attack, bro, it's almost good.
00:27:13.040
I think, but I'm just wondering if at some point, do you think that we will get like,
00:27:20.460
So one, do you ever meet a woman where you're like, oh, she's almost, there's some B, there's
00:27:25.560
something in her where it's like, oh, I could almost date that woman.
00:27:30.340
Cause I'm just curious as to like the, so it's not as, as a hundred percent like black, like
00:27:37.740
There are women that I see that I'm, I, I'm like, maybe I could date that woman.
00:27:42.120
You know, Whitney Cummings is a multimillionaire.
00:27:49.760
Like just get to the point where she's got to, she's like, I'm taking my tits off.
00:27:58.060
That's, I think she likes her tits, but I could see her evolving into a suit.
00:28:05.280
Yeah, I could see her evolving into somewhat like an androgynous power suit where you see
00:28:13.940
I could see her eventually being the husband of the doll of herself that she has.
00:28:30.200
And I could almost see then, and that is when she will sell her greatest show ever,
00:28:37.840
Where she is now kind of identifying as male and she's married her robot.
00:28:49.880
And to feel something, they go out into her yard and watch a couple of her $2 million giraffes talk.
00:29:00.920
I'm waiting for her to go full safari because she hated Tiger King.
00:29:07.000
But she's going to go full safari and then just be like, fuck it.
00:29:10.680
The animals are happier in captivity and that's it.
00:29:15.380
Yeah, I want to watch her walk around with a gun and just like just putting the gun on the tiger
00:29:20.620
and then he just like cowers and go, man, you've made a full 180 from animal rights advocate
00:29:40.500
Bro, it's very, yeah, it's very white Africa that she's running.
00:29:47.940
She kept bringing back this cat to this animal hospital and she's like, you got to fix this cat.
00:29:59.400
Like this poor cat would just leave someone's house in West Hollywood trying to die.
00:30:05.040
She keeps scooping this motherfucker up and bringing him to the animal hospital.
00:30:13.260
And this crazy bitch keeps picking me up in her Tesla and driving me to some hospital.
00:30:21.300
She's like, make a robot version of this cat right now so that he can live forever.
00:30:33.780
She's going to be the worst ending to that whole part.
00:30:48.100
Anytime I talk to her, she tries to get me to adopt like a very rare animal.
00:30:52.820
Like, I don't think I'm ready for like an owl or like a Shetland pony.
00:31:05.740
She's like, do you have a stand up shower you're not using?
00:31:08.500
I love that she goes to war with like the animal rights, like those tiger king people
00:31:16.700
It'll be some guy with a tiger and it's like three comments down as Whitney coming to be
00:31:19.500
like, you know what this is doing to the animal.
00:31:22.440
You know, I'm like, she's very probably right statue of her.
00:31:26.760
She's very, she has that Ulysses S. Grant of Animalia kind of.
00:31:42.360
He'd take it to the dog park and it would fuck every dog in there.
00:31:44.980
And we used to get high and we were young and go over there and watch it.
00:31:51.280
And then it was easier too to talk to women because your dog's over there.
00:31:57.240
They're like, if his dog can do that, what can this guy do?
00:32:00.700
Then you roll up with the erectile dysfunction, which is my big get out of jail free card.
00:32:05.400
But that's why it's hard to meet to a guy with ED, you know?
00:32:19.300
You have a doctor writing you a letter like a kid showing up to school with a doctor's
00:32:34.020
If there's like a time where you can like sometimes even with women, you're like, oh, that woman
00:32:41.580
I think there's certain people that are so good looking.
00:32:53.480
Like, is that the hottest chick that a gay guy could get?
00:33:07.820
The idea of anything that's like, you know, you're turning a straight guy.
00:33:12.440
People, that's like a fantasy that people have.
00:33:20.500
Like, there's a lot of people out there that are like, yeah, I fucked a straight guy.
00:33:30.620
You fucked someone who's claiming to be straight, but it's like, yeah, I don't like, I've met
00:33:36.240
guys and they've been like, yeah, I've never been out on a date with a guy before.
00:33:40.120
I'm not the guy that brings you into homosexuality.
00:33:50.180
I'm like, you've been down the road a little bit here.
00:33:53.500
If you're going out with me, you've been down the road.
00:34:00.620
You know, you hung out in some college party, smoked a little weed, then lost your job
00:34:09.260
No, there's, there's, yeah, I'm not the gateway drug.
00:34:14.560
So I think that the people, yeah, obviously it's a legit straight guy where you're like,
00:34:26.000
Now, do you think there's also, now we talk about drug induced homosexuality a lot on this
00:34:34.020
Um, that as a certain, I believe in drug induced drug addiction.
00:34:38.580
So I believe that you will do, I believe that you will do things to get drugs.
00:34:43.900
But do you think though that people will get fucked up enough that at a certain point, like
00:34:51.460
At 1 AM when, you know, somebody has an eight ball of Coke in them, suddenly two guys are
00:34:59.020
And you're like, oh, this is, it might be that, or it might be two guys love Coke.
00:35:02.720
Like, I, like in that tiger King thing, those guys weren't gay.
00:35:09.820
That was their, he was their supplier of drugs.
00:35:12.780
And then after that, they were like, yeah, I want to fuck women.
00:35:15.160
So they engaged in gay activities to get drugs.
00:35:20.960
Is it possible that if you're doing drugs, you start to be like, it's easier to be gay.
00:35:28.140
When you're on drugs, it's easier to be anything.
00:35:30.080
Like when I used to drink, I thought I had money.
00:35:34.440
So I thought, I was like, oh, it's easier to be rich.
00:35:42.920
Then you saw a brother, you go, I don't actually have money, but when I'm drunk, I feel like
00:35:56.260
Especially the drugs that they have now, you know, like it's like the argument.
00:36:02.220
It's like, is it easier to fight a pit bull when you're on bath salts?
00:36:08.380
You know, it's like, would that, but that person probably wasn't a complete stranger to that
00:36:15.400
That person's probably choked a fucking Jack Russell before.
00:36:18.340
That person's probably drop kicked a cat or something.
00:36:21.340
And they just got really into like fighting pits.
00:36:27.360
So maybe for some people, it's them taking on a fear that they didn't know that they had.
00:36:32.060
Do you think some people view homosexuality as a fear?
00:36:36.420
I think anybody, anytime you lose control of your image, you're scared.
00:36:41.040
So when you say you're a gay person, when you say you're a political, like if somebody says
00:36:46.680
I'm a conservative or I'm a liberal or I'm a socialist or I'm gay or I'm a vegan, all
00:36:54.160
You lose control of your individuality because that group is associated with all kinds of
00:37:00.800
So the minute that people view you as a member of a group.
00:37:06.300
And if people lose their ability to like manage their own image and then people like, oh,
00:37:16.800
So I think the fear is the stigma that's attached to that group.
00:37:22.140
So for a while, there's a stigma attached to homosexuality and I'm sure there still is
00:37:31.600
Do you feel like you get hit on by more Mexican men or?
00:37:38.520
I don't really answer a lot of the app things, but yeah.
00:37:48.760
And I'm not racist, but I just don't ever like, I never.
00:37:54.700
I feel like a Mexican man would be easy to date kind of, you know, especially because
00:37:59.860
I don't know actually, like when you say Mexican, I think of like some guy.
00:38:12.100
But I've never been out with, I think with an official 100% Mexican guy.
00:38:16.400
But I've gone out with guys that were Hispanic.
00:38:17.940
But a lot of guys hit on me that are like from other parts of the world.
00:38:26.120
I think I'm the symbol of, I think a bigger white guy is a symbol of prosperity to other
00:38:34.900
Cause you come, yeah, they're used to seeing you come to their country to like get to date,
00:38:40.440
They're like, oh, this is the guy who comes down for sex tourism.
00:38:49.400
This is the guy who, who shows up on the train and looks around a little bit and nods
00:38:55.300
This is the guy who goes to the Philippines for the food.
00:39:11.860
I look like a guy that will go, you know, the, the, the Eli Roth, the hostile, that movie.
00:39:15.880
I look like a guy who goes to Bratislava and who wants to just saw people in half and then
00:39:21.060
just goes back to his bank job and just sit back on the golf course, just hitting balls.
00:39:33.920
So I think those people see me and they're like, oh good.
00:39:41.580
You seem like the guy who made like the monopoly that old guy, like his son, like kind of one
00:39:46.880
I look like a guy that didn't earn the money, but somehow I have it.
00:39:52.360
But like I'm Orville Redenbacher's great grandson.
00:39:57.900
I just made my living popping corn and I just sit at the local bar and I'm real free with
00:40:02.480
my opinions and I've never earned a dollar in my life.
00:40:06.280
I've never earned an honest dollar in my life and I'm just living off popcorn money
00:40:29.280
But you look like the cop that are like, whoa, how'd this guy get on?
00:40:33.600
How'd he, like if you've been on the force for eight years, it's like, oh yeah, he's
00:40:37.820
But if he just got on the force, how did it even happen?
00:40:51.820
It's definitely, it's that time during COVID when you'll see somebody pushing their family
00:40:57.020
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00:41:04.380
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00:45:09.720
We've got a question that came in right here for you.
00:45:33.500
Because I saw you at a restaurant the other day?
00:45:42.500
Because guys like Joe Rogan have all this discipline.
00:46:03.460
I know that somebody came up with that title for you at your publishing company.
00:46:14.860
What's the toughest part of dieting you think for you?
00:46:24.080
Because at eight o'clock, I get into this thing like I deserve a treat.
00:46:30.960
There's not too many things in the world that make you happy.
00:46:35.520
There's not that many things in the world that make you happy.
00:46:44.220
So food is a thing that it just triggers my response.
00:46:49.100
And it's like my parents, when I was young, they just set me on that course of like, oh,
00:46:56.520
And they just put it in your hand or something?
00:46:58.400
Yeah, they would just put a scoop of ice cream in my hand while I laid in bed and I would
00:47:04.700
And they would just take me to eat because we didn't have that much money.
00:47:08.340
And the only luxury was like, let's get a fun food.
00:47:17.560
Food is the only luxury for people that don't have a lot of money.
00:47:26.600
Let's go cook over by the river or cook outdoors.
00:47:29.180
Your family, I imagine, was like, let's deep fry a dog or something, you know, but let's
00:47:41.100
I had a cousin that ended up working by the damn golf course.
00:47:44.080
And so, dude, one time he comes home with two fucking swans, bro.
00:48:01.560
Here's a guy, obviously, who's looking to date.
00:48:06.640
This guy looks like he didn't answer a contact tracing call.
00:48:17.140
Mr. Vaughn, long-time listener, watcher, first-time caller and communicator.
00:48:24.200
I don't have a top mullet, but I got a little back hair mullet.
00:48:29.580
What do you think about the assassin killing himself that shot the judge's son?
00:48:36.040
And this Ghislaine Maxwell shit's getting a little crazy on us.
00:48:42.960
First, let's just establish that Epstein, you believe Epstein was a pedophile.
00:48:47.140
I'm just saying, let's just establish some ground.
00:48:57.500
Yes, I will take the controversial stance that I believe Epstein is a pedophile.
00:49:10.100
I think Ms. Maxwell was involved in some lurid and inappropriate activities.
00:49:18.500
Rich people, every now and then rich people just become rich and they forget that they
00:49:25.660
He was at a golf tee on Mar-a-Lago in his mind.
00:49:28.380
And he said what he would have said to some CEO that was next to him.
00:49:33.220
Because that's when you're like, yeah, my son, he got into it underage.
00:49:41.380
People don't understand also, yeah, that rich mindset.
00:49:46.760
Like Ghislaine got busted having a couple of chocolates she shouldn't have had, you
00:49:52.480
Hey, man, just get out of my world with your problems.
00:50:03.520
If Ghislaine wasn't rich, it would be like, yeah, burn her.
00:50:09.620
But because she's rich, I don't want to see a member of my own class really bite the
00:50:15.600
I hope she has to write a long apology letter to the girls and they put her back on a boat.
00:50:24.320
The judge that was assigned to look into the money laundering at Deutsche Bank, a bunch of
00:50:28.920
investors at Deutsche Bank were like, hey, why are you letting Jeffrey Epstein and all
00:50:32.780
Why are you tolerating all these high risk clients?
00:50:35.820
So a bunch of investors at Deutsche Bank got mad at this.
00:50:38.660
And Deutsche Bank should have just sent out a letter and went, shut the fuck up.
00:50:52.280
You only care because it's the goddamn news, Cliff.
00:51:02.960
So there were some banks, there's some investors, because I don't know all about it.
00:51:10.260
And they were all working with the same, a lot of shady people working with the same
00:51:14.820
And Deutsche Bank's like a lot of their executives end up killing themselves in Malibu.
00:51:18.240
It's super suspect because people in Malibu don't kill themselves.
00:51:23.500
So this idea that all these people in Malibu were like, I just can't do another day in the
00:51:37.440
So they are handling high risk clients like Jeffrey Epstein.
00:51:41.940
And a bunch of investors like, hey, what are you doing here?
00:51:47.440
So they bring a class action suit against Deutsche Bank.
00:51:52.300
Four days later, her son and her husband, a guy shows up in a FedEx suit.
00:51:56.040
Her son and her husband end up getting killed or her husband's not dead.
00:52:00.820
And then the guy who does this goes and kills himself about an hour and a half later.
00:52:04.560
Now, supposedly this guy, this guy named Roy Hollander was a men's rights activist who
00:52:09.220
had actually called an opium Anthony and like argued with Jim Norton.
00:52:24.920
So what people are, what I am a little suspicious about is I'm like, is this guy actually the
00:52:35.240
Because this, you know, this is a crazy coincidence that this woman's child is now dead because
00:52:44.340
Like, cause you're telling all the old judges like, Hey, you might want to gamble with
00:52:52.620
And it makes you think about anytime somebody kills himself and they can't be asked any
00:53:00.220
So it's entirely possible that this was some type of threat or, you know, a way to intimidate
00:53:10.360
It's also possible that this guy is just a crazy guy that killed the judge.
00:53:16.420
So have, has the judge responded after the killing?
00:53:31.060
I'm like, that's makes me start thinking like, wait a minute.
00:53:36.380
A good place to go look for someone who would do something like this is someone who
00:53:48.040
They're like, this is where we find crazy people.
00:53:53.140
This guy also 20 years ago worked for Kroll Securities, which is like an intelligent corporate
00:53:58.460
espionage, intelligence gathering, a major corporation.
00:54:02.440
He worked for a year in Russia handling intelligence gathering for Kroll.
00:54:08.840
Yeah, it's a very weird like background for the guy to have, you know, here's a guy right
00:54:20.620
Tim, I saw you at the stress factory in Bridgeport, Connecticut, and you said that I look like
00:54:25.680
I traffic children because I was wearing a suit.
00:54:31.800
And two, do you think Glenn is going to make it to trial?
00:54:36.560
Number one, let me retract that statement because now you look like a dirtbag who can't afford
00:54:43.160
Well, he does have a Frisbee collection behind him.
00:54:45.660
Now you look like you traffic pizzas to people's homes for a living.
00:54:52.340
You look like you're trafficking for Papa John's, trafficking breadsticks to poor people.
00:54:59.740
I mean, not if a lot of powerful people have something to say about it.
00:55:05.200
Do you think, I mean, do you think a lot of people really were into this type of thing?
00:55:10.980
Like they would fly over there to have sex with you?
00:55:22.120
So if you're an intelligence agency or whatever, even, you know, a billionaire that wants to
00:55:27.400
control senators or congressmen or whatever, because you don't want the passing laws that
00:55:32.320
It's just a, it's a foolproof way to be like, yeah, oh, you're going to vote that way.
00:55:38.480
So in the end, do you think that Epstein's biggest problem was, or not obviously he had
00:55:42.720
a lot of problems, but do you think that one of the underlying issues of all of his
00:55:47.180
It was like, how do I, it was all about like manipulation people.
00:55:54.040
And Epstein was just a facilitator for bigger forces that are looking to control people.
00:56:01.720
I mean, I'm sure, listen, there's reasons in Hollywood that the same actors get the same
00:56:08.560
And a lot of them are very talented, but I think a lot of it is that they have very powerful
00:56:13.040
agents and people that are able to like get, make things happen.
00:56:29.440
So, I mean, it's, it's, it's entirely possible that like, this is just the way things have
00:56:37.640
And now it's coming to light because you have the internet and you have people back
00:56:44.400
So one girl that had a crazy experience couldn't email another girl and go, Hey, did this happen
00:56:52.940
Here's a young man right here that has a question who may have been trafficked.
00:57:03.320
I check out your podcast pretty much any chance I get.
00:57:06.880
Uh, I was going to ask, uh, this can be for both of y'all with all the craziness going
00:57:14.880
Uh, would you guys consider getting a stunning estate in the stunning state of Kentucky?
00:57:34.320
Does it make you feel a certain way when you see this guy?
00:57:36.260
Well, I say I'll move in with him in Kentucky if he wants.
00:57:39.900
If that's what he's offering, I imagine that's what this is about.
00:57:42.620
Uh, he also looks a little bit, I want to say, like, um, Kylie Jenner.
00:57:50.660
He has this weird, like, you could just imagine him as kind of anything.
00:57:55.340
Yeah, like, maybe he's a good looking pilot, but maybe he's 10 other things.
00:57:59.800
So he's got this weird kind of like, there's nothing distinct about him.
00:58:04.080
He's just a weird, like, model type of, like, look.
00:58:12.940
In Kentucky, this guy is a damn, I mean, he is a, look, he's a nine, male or female in Kentucky.
00:58:25.240
The answer is, the answer is no, and you're not going to Kentucky.
00:58:36.780
I'm thinking of going, I'm going to go look in Nashville.
00:58:54.420
Um, but, um, yeah, money starts to be one of the premises.
00:59:00.080
And then also, what's, what are you paying towards?
00:59:02.320
It's like, if I'm paying taxes, like, what is it going towards?
00:59:06.440
And then if everything's shut down, do, should I get my taxes back?
00:59:17.300
And I'm like, I know I have friends leaving and going other places, but I don't know.
00:59:20.900
I feel, I feel kind of like LA is going to, I think we're all like thinking that this
00:59:26.980
And every decision we're making and every thought in our mind is based on the idea that
00:59:31.020
this doesn't end, which could happen and would be terrifying and probably a whole host of
00:59:41.980
And then doesn't things go back to something resembling what we're used to?
00:59:46.560
And maybe it doesn't, but I mean, if it ends, are we going to want to be somewhere
00:59:55.720
That's what I, yeah, yeah, because I start to think, yeah, I would like to get in a place
00:59:59.920
that has probably, I mean, I'd love to get in a place where I can save tax money, but
01:00:05.820
Like, it's nice to be around like people, you know, and like, you know, to be able to
01:00:14.480
Like, it feels like one of those Netflix series where like some, somebody moves to like
01:00:18.740
You know, and they're like, I got to now meet everybody.
01:00:22.940
I just feel like, I just feel like, I don't think anyone has to do anything drastic just
01:00:29.540
See if you feel this way in January and you might.
01:00:37.300
As soon as this all started to happen in March, I said, this year is shot.
01:00:58.920
Do you think, do you think Trump will win or lose?
01:01:09.220
Debates could, could, could make him the favorite again, because Biden is not a good debater
01:01:13.680
and he's kind of mentally not there, but I think Trump's fighting a lot of battles that
01:01:26.700
That's why I keep explaining to my friends who are like super pro-Trump.
01:01:29.100
I'm like, if there was a CEO of a company and half the people in it thought he was trying
01:01:33.760
to kill them, even if they were wrong, you can't get rid of half of them.
01:01:39.980
Like he pours gasoline and like every day, whether he's, he might not be trying to kill
01:01:45.380
them, but every day he gets in the elevator and he's like, maybe I'll kill you.
01:01:53.600
And then the other people, the company are like, that's the way he is.
01:02:00.500
And they're like, no, he said there was poison in the pen.
01:02:05.400
It's amazing how we can't live in this schizophrenia forever.
01:02:08.680
So many people take everything he says so, so seriously.
01:02:12.720
It's like, um, and also I think a lot of people want him to be something that he isn't a lot
01:02:17.720
It's like a lot of people elected him knowing he was a like crazy, wild, odd businessman.
01:02:26.720
He's the most successful con artist of all time, which is why there's part of me that
01:02:32.060
The people on the right think he was chosen by Jesus to free every child that's being
01:02:38.940
The people on the left think he's Adolf Hitler.
01:02:41.580
The reality is he's a riverboat casino hustler.
01:02:46.780
And he's just been able to bluff because he knows social media and he knows, and I think
01:02:56.620
He's the most successful fucking card shark, three card Monty dealer, bullshit slumlord
01:03:10.460
And that character to me, not that he's this omnipotent force of evil or that he's this
01:03:18.260
The idea that he's just kind of a regular guy who's a con makes him more impressive
01:03:26.120
And it makes the story actually a lot more interesting.
01:03:30.680
If you want a good show, if you don't have cable anymore, but you still want to be a part
01:03:36.040
like if you're able to have the separatist and not get it, like sometimes I get my boots
01:03:41.980
If you're able to keep your boots out of the mud, there's no greater show.
01:03:50.480
I mean, America's going to give you money, you know, like, but I, I also think.
01:03:59.420
Right now people are getting mailed money and can't handle it.
01:04:06.040
They're getting money home once a month and they just cannot hack it.
01:04:12.800
They got to go to Applebee's and just lick the floor.
01:04:16.640
I remember when he won, which I thought he was going to win.
01:04:33.280
And then everybody had this, this very interesting moment too.
01:04:36.340
And it happens in every thriller, in every thriller, most thrillers, there's a scene where the car is dangling off the mountain.
01:04:46.600
And everybody's, you're kind of in that moment of being like, what's going to happen now?
01:04:56.440
Does the Mercedes Benz back up in Jurassic Park?
01:05:00.500
And the problem is we've been living in that moment for four years.
01:05:04.580
Like that moment of like tension and anxiety and what happens.
01:05:11.220
And then some people are like, no, but they could die.
01:05:13.360
And some people are like, yeah, but they're not real.
01:05:15.060
And some people are like, no, but they are actually real.
01:05:22.580
Everybody's so invested in one side or the other side.
01:05:24.980
I look at the guy and I'm like, nobody's had a wilder life than this guy.
01:05:28.940
Nobody, like he might've has one of the most crazy lives in history.
01:05:32.300
I can't believe that more black men don't low key think that Donald Trump is.
01:05:38.020
Because he's like a complete, like he's a, the G he's like in that regard of like money, cash, hoes.
01:05:47.120
Men in general, I think, cause we tend to like, just, we're not like, I think women might think about things a little more.
01:05:57.920
But men might just take something at face value.
01:06:00.480
And sometimes the stuff he says, you just go fucking hilarious.
01:06:05.900
Whereas a woman will be like, ah, that was horrible.
01:06:08.220
Like he said a horrible thing and he's our president.
01:06:11.120
And you're like, yeah, but he's, it's just funny.
01:06:13.260
But also when you grow up poor, especially, I mean, growing up poor and white, like you never have any, I never thought any politicians were really much but client.
01:06:20.940
Like it always seemed like, like they never came to our neighborhood and did anything, you know?
01:06:26.580
I remember the richest guy I knew would drive by our neighborhood.
01:06:29.100
He was a veterinarian and he would throw dead animals into the ditch outside of our apartment complex.
01:06:34.220
And I remember we would throw like carcasses, like, like Cossacks and like, you know, goat occipitals and shit at each other.
01:06:42.240
Just, you know, and just rattle off, you know, if you got a rib cage, you would just have unlimited bullets.
01:06:46.500
It's a real scene from True Detective for an entire childhood.
01:06:48.760
But just like, and that was like, kind of like he was a city councilman or something, I think.
01:06:53.180
And that was the closest we ever got to politics.
01:06:55.800
The guy that was a senator, lived in my town, clearly a mob guy, right?
01:07:05.800
And he was just like, he would just walk around the San Gennaro festival, just like eating this little custard and like just drinking booze.
01:07:20.620
Now, he's a nice guy and my family liked him, but it's like, they don't care.
01:07:29.280
Yeah, he would just walk around and like, you know, he'd have like a little eggplant parmesan.
01:07:33.660
He'd be twirling linguine in a little, like a little paper, a little plastic cup.
01:07:38.140
He'd be twirling linguine and just walk around eating it.
01:07:40.440
And like, you know, they'd be playing like, when the moon hits you.
01:07:44.080
And I'm like, what are the chances this guy's, I bet he's pretty swayable.
01:07:49.040
I bet you could put him in a room, hand him a little money.
01:07:51.680
D'Amato is chairman of the Poker Players Alliance.
01:07:53.920
A non-profit organization set up to help protect and fight for the rights of poker players in the United States.
01:08:07.780
Sound like Brennan Shaw right now, but his dime-y dime of a wife.
01:08:20.040
Here's the interesting thing I think about Trump.
01:08:22.120
I think he's a reflection of what we have become.
01:08:35.740
I just, to me, he's like the, he's the mirror we don't want to see, like, in a lot of ways, you know?
01:08:42.520
What bothers him about really rich people is, like, what they will say at a country club to each other privately.
01:08:50.140
He'll just go out and say it to the United Nations.
01:08:56.980
You're like, you know, he's the dad in your neighborhood who's like, this neighborhood's changing.
01:09:05.200
Now the guy who sits on his patio smoking a cigar saying veiled racist things is now the president of the United States.
01:09:12.200
It's a problem, but it's also the most predictable thing ever.
01:09:28.240
He came in at a time, like, he came in at a time where things were getting off.
01:09:38.500
Like, even though things weren't good for millions of people,
01:09:41.320
all we really look at is, like, media and everything.
01:09:45.920
And Obama was in and everybody was like, yeah, things are kind of good.
01:09:51.020
What if we just throw this wrecking ball at, like, it might just be interesting again.
01:09:57.140
Now we're just living in a time where we're like, oh, we didn't know how interesting it was going to get.
01:10:07.040
I didn't realize how many people were ready to just burn down a Trader Joe's.
01:10:11.820
I didn't realize how many people were like, you know, I'm mad about that.
01:10:17.620
We're going to start to see, like, people putting Antifa on their resumes.
01:10:26.860
I was look out at that footlocker that went down outside of Tempe.
01:10:49.240
But it's just like, I get it because I have friends that are like, man, I don't know what I'm going to do now.
01:10:59.260
And when it's open, we can only fill 30% of the tables.
01:11:02.640
And I'm not getting unemployment anymore because I'm working.
01:11:05.200
But people, those people are saying people are still ejaculating into their girlfriend.
01:11:20.120
How do you think the whole, the book, the storybook of humanity kind of ends?
01:11:25.420
Well, you're looking at, you're looking at, I think it ends in a dystopian place.
01:11:44.400
I think outside there's going to be like fights and people will be fighting each other.
01:11:51.280
Hopefully there'll be fists fighting each other inside of an Olive Garden.
01:11:56.160
The government's going to be like snatching people up.
01:11:59.500
And then you'll be inside your house with like VR goggles on, like doing TikTok dances.
01:12:04.920
And outside there's going to be explosions and you're just going to hear gunshots.
01:12:08.740
And then you just can't hear it because you're in like this augmented reality world of like,
01:12:13.460
the whole thing is we just climbed into the computer.
01:12:15.760
When this started, everybody was just like, well, the outside's a problem.
01:12:26.560
So humanity will, it'll just get weirder and weirder and weirder to the point where if you're like,
01:12:33.040
Somebody's going to be looking and you go, are you fucking sick?
01:12:38.920
Marauding gangs, coronaviruses, diseases, government agents.
01:12:52.580
And I think TikTok is a great way to take a glimpse into the future because the news will be like everybody's dying
01:12:58.900
and then the kids on TikTok are just like, you know, just like this.
01:13:10.460
Like some kids getting molested and the Teletubbies are just dancing on the screen.
01:13:13.560
And they're just like mouthing the words to songs they didn't write.
01:13:19.240
And then, and that's kind of the beginning of, of, and then you have this girl who mouths Trump, like Sarah Cooper, whatever her name is, who's whatever talented.
01:13:28.560
I'm not chitting on her, but like she just like Trump, she like lip syncs Trump.
01:13:33.120
So he'll say something and she goes on TikTok and she's got this massive following, just like lip syncing Trump.
01:13:38.800
It's just like, it's going to be like people lip syncing music or the words of other people.
01:13:47.280
It's going to, it's starting to feel strange out there.
01:13:49.940
And I think it just gets weirder and weirder to the point where we all just want to live in a video game because it's more comforting than real life.
01:13:57.060
And what about if semen comes out of our bodies?
01:14:02.340
But I think a lot of it will be like, it'll be, it'll be sex robots.
01:14:09.300
It'll be, they'll still be fucking and everything, but it'll be just a weird.
01:14:13.640
It's going to go into, you know, the way that these augmented reality games or virtual reality feels.
01:14:18.620
I think that it's very possible that like porn gets so fucking powerful and crazy.
01:14:35.140
Here's a young man that's obviously had some issues, hopefully.
01:14:47.980
For a long time now, I've said that Timmy Dillon is a top five homosexual man of all time,
01:14:56.780
Can either of you name five cooler gay dudes than Timmy Dillon?
01:15:09.240
I don't want to make you think that there's identity politics within the comedy world.
01:15:15.660
I think it's just fascinating that I don't know a lot of gay men that I talk to on a
01:15:54.760
But he, but still, one of the most talented actors ever.
01:16:17.080
I think he's saying because you're so cool, not because gay guys aren't cool.
01:16:28.340
Abraham Lincoln slept with a dude for like three years.
01:16:46.320
Let me think of some really admirable gay males out there.
01:16:58.200
Like the ones that are important in history, like Harvey Milk and people like that.
01:17:14.480
I don't know if I ever really think about it like that exactly.
01:17:31.660
And I know enough about him, but I don't know too much about him.
01:17:34.800
But he was one of the first gay guys to be like, I'm also evil.
01:17:48.000
But there's just as many evil people in the gay community as there are in the straight community.
01:18:00.520
Like the distinction of sexuality is going to be somewhat less.
01:18:16.680
He's like, all right, well, we're going to put you all under tremendous emotional financial strain.
01:18:32.720
Like when people, when people start to see other people as just contestants.
01:19:06.300
So, if you hate Trump and you're watching the Real Housewives, you are being inconsistent.
01:19:11.900
Because that type of perversion of reality where we know it's fake, but we watch it anyway.
01:19:20.720
So, that ability to manipulate situations, manufacture them, things that we know are bullshit, but
01:19:35.340
Well, it's interesting, too, that Hollywood, there's not a lot of, like, Hollywood never
01:19:38.200
stands up and says, oh, like, they made him a celebrity.
01:19:43.600
People always knew he was this long-coated businessman.
01:19:47.340
And that's why the people on the right, they're like, fuck Hollywood.
01:19:53.000
He's a, 15 years, he had one of the top-rated shows on TV.
01:19:57.800
But Hollywood never takes any credit for creating the, you know, what they refer to as the monster.
01:20:05.760
Bro, it's almost, he's just such a successful con.
01:20:09.680
You just got to look back and go, this guy has just every single opportunity this guy's
01:20:16.660
ever had to just leverage himself, bite off something more than he could chew.
01:20:28.780
And he's been able to do it at the highest level humanly possible.
01:20:34.600
But is there any, here's one thing I think that we romanticize is the different levels.
01:20:39.800
Like, there are different levels, but I wonder if that ability ever, maybe it is like poker.
01:20:46.340
When you're in the bigger games, it seems you fade, some people fade under that pressure.
01:20:51.120
But some people who aren't, have very, probably not much empathy.
01:20:56.560
There's nothing in that guy's life he said, I can't do.
01:21:01.860
I mean, that's not, like, if you think of the most successful guy you know, you know,
01:21:06.660
he would still say, hey, man, that's not for me.
01:21:09.820
This guy didn't think anything was beyond the realm of his doing.
01:21:16.040
And part of that is this just, the idea that, like, no matter what situation I'm in, I'll
01:21:38.320
There's a lot to look at him and aspire to in a weird way.
01:21:42.220
And that, if we don't have that conversation, we'll never understand why he's so popular.
01:21:47.440
And if you don't admit that a lot of what he does and a lot of the people he calls out,
01:21:50.940
whether it's the media or things that are equally fucked up, if you don't admit that
01:21:56.180
he's right about some of that, you'll never beat him.
01:21:58.820
The reason that he wins is because you keep saying he's wrong about everything.
01:22:03.260
But if you cede some ground to him and go, yeah, he made a few good points, but it doesn't
01:22:10.320
matter because he's not, he just can't do the job.
01:22:18.360
And everyone's forgot that being the president's a job.
01:22:22.800
It's like managing people, inspiring people, taking responsibility.
01:22:27.640
Not, I mean, this is, imagine if your life was falling apart and you went, your family's
01:22:32.580
life was falling apart and your father, instead of like going out there trying to get another
01:22:36.480
job, was like blaming your little brother, complaining about the food your mother was
01:22:40.300
making, being like, he's a scumbag, you know, that, you know, any, any, anything.
01:22:46.620
I mean, this guy's been outsourcing his room cleaning.
01:22:48.640
I mean, right, just he, Trump is, you'd never want a guy like that as a leader.
01:23:00.100
Like if somebody comes in, I've worked in offices.
01:23:07.220
You don't turn around in the whole office and go, look at Mary.
01:23:14.680
Look at Mary, overusing her bathroom privileges, isn't she?
01:23:22.920
And rumor has it, she duplicated the key to the bathroom.
01:23:26.160
But if you're a fly-by-night con artist, you can do that because what you're really doing,
01:23:35.480
And then people buy, he's not this amazing business guy.
01:23:42.100
And if you're famous, you could just treat people like shit.
01:23:45.700
But I also think, though, that he wants to be, even if the business is shady and other people don't like it, that he applies those same concepts to a lot of things that in America would seem more like traditional stances.
01:24:03.460
Like, okay, let's stay a part of the World Health Organization and the CDC because of just how it looks, how it makes the rest of the countries feel.
01:24:11.280
But he's like, this organization hasn't done, you know, if you look at the pluses and minuses, it hasn't done shit.
01:24:21.020
And there's a way to do it that doesn't feel like we're heading towards civil war.
01:24:32.700
These multinational, these, these institutions like the UN, the CDC, the WHO, they're all corrupt.
01:24:38.660
They're all, they all have a litany of problems and America does foot the bill for a lot of things and not get any benefit out of it.
01:24:45.900
But there's a way to disentangle yourself from those systems without, it's just the way you do it.
01:24:54.020
He, his, he just doesn't have his bedside manner is for funerals only.
01:25:02.100
It's a guy like Bill Burr said, it's a guy that just lived on the top of a building.
01:25:13.580
And that's just not, I think, ideal qualities for a president.
01:25:19.740
I was on board and then Trader Joe's got burnt down.
01:25:27.280
He won't, he won't act like he will just keep pouring gasoline on this until this entire country is at war with each other.
01:25:35.840
I don't really give a shit, but I just walk outside.
01:25:38.640
I look around, I go, this is probably not good.
01:25:57.840
Just give people health insurance and go back to it being boring.
01:26:02.060
Just let people get an operation and go back to, let's let entertainers be entertaining.
01:26:11.080
Let's not chain him to a desk and make him apologize.
01:26:15.480
Let's let people be funny that should be funny.
01:26:18.380
And let's get an old, boring person as the president.
01:26:22.080
What woman is most likely to get busted for blackface in the future?
01:26:30.060
That's just because it's funnier to see a fat lady in blackface.
01:26:35.300
I could see Chelsea Handler having done something at like a-
01:26:37.800
Chelsea Handler built her entire career calling a little Mexican guy a nugget.
01:26:50.160
Dude, it's also a two-syllable word that she wished to, you know.
01:26:52.840
And she culture of, didn't she appropriates that rapper guy?
01:26:58.240
And now she's walking around like she's Malcolm X.
01:27:04.240
I said, I hope she goes and apologizes for everything America's done wrong.
01:27:20.540
Sometimes it feels like a lot of women that they have to take on a political route heavily.
01:27:42.720
And if politics is relevant, they're political.
01:27:46.240
If this went the other way and no one cared about politics, she'd be still talking about
01:27:51.400
people eating her out in a Mexican restaurant or whatever the hell she wrote books about.
01:27:56.460
She's talking about politics because that's where-
01:28:03.740
If politics wasn't relevant, Chelsea Handler would be riding seven Mexican guys down the
01:28:08.100
street on her way to a Cinco de Mayo celebration.
01:28:12.880
I mean, I don't know that she's ever read a book or has any thoughts about anything.
01:28:24.700
And here comes someone right here, a beautiful young man right here.
01:28:28.640
I'm impressed with the looks on the audience here.
01:28:34.120
My people, when they call in, it's all ski masks.
01:28:36.300
You can't see their face because they're wanted by the feds.
01:28:40.280
It must be a weird Venn diagram of your guys' fans that-
01:28:46.240
The only question I have for you is in relation to something that I'm dealing with right now
01:28:52.060
where I'm trying to find a better place to live, but I can't because of my horrible
01:28:58.140
I owe so much money to creditors because of chemotherapy.
01:29:03.280
Even if I do, I'm just going to keep having these delinquent marks on my credit report.
01:29:07.680
So, I'm wondering what you did with your horrible credit to be able to rent some real estate
01:29:15.440
out in the middle of the desert because that is what I strive to do.
01:29:18.660
If you see this question and reply to it, I greatly appreciate it.
01:29:22.700
Well, number one, let me say it was a little irresponsible of you to get cancer.
01:29:34.000
Cancer is also, I do want to say it's a luxury.
01:29:39.360
You can do credit repair and all that bullshit.
01:29:43.040
So, if I get an apartment, I got to pay 12 months in advance because my credit sucks.
01:29:46.500
So, I have to pay upfront for everything I get because I put myself in that position.
01:29:54.820
But, I mean, you want to repair the credit because that's-
01:29:59.680
But, if you can save a little cash, people might take-
01:30:02.500
If you have a bad credit score, people might take three months up front now.
01:30:07.380
So, if it's $3,000 a month, you could say, look, I'll give you $2,400 and I'll pay you five months up front.
01:30:12.500
Also, this is going to lead right into our ad for Bridge Credit Solutions.
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01:30:44.060
But the bank won't give me that refi because I have some dings on me credit.
01:30:49.820
Yeah, I got a couple of, you know, just a couple of, just made some poor choices.
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Missed a payment, you know, missed two payments, actually.
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01:32:32.060
Nick, do you remember anything else we wanted to talk about?
01:32:44.940
Oh, you're going to Spade's Dinner tonight, aren't you?
01:33:02.000
Tucker Carlson, New York Times, released his address.
01:33:20.000
I love all these people that are so committed to, like, hating a guy or loving a guy.
01:33:26.640
Every now and then I go, yeah, I don't think so.
01:33:32.220
Because I notice sometimes I'll notice I'll fall into it if I really let myself.
01:33:51.280
So, a lot of people are sitting on a couch and they're on a computer.
01:34:03.140
People want to generally be in a group and to have allies and then to have another group
01:34:17.480
People just like having friends that they connect with and they get these friends by
01:34:25.980
So, you can't look at a guy like Tucker Carlson and go, he's a human being and then he might
01:34:34.560
He's a direct enemy of you because he espouses a different political ideology because you think
01:34:40.980
that he's making life unsafe for people because of what he believes.
01:34:50.740
If you're an undocumented immigrant, obviously your opinion of Trump is probably very different
01:34:56.220
than a guy like me who has a luxury of being like, hey, I'm not getting deported.
01:35:01.960
That doesn't mean every political argument you're ever going to have, there's real life consequences
01:35:09.380
That doesn't mean you can't have a political argument about immigration.
01:35:16.040
Some people think that once they're in one lane that they have to stay in that lane for
01:35:21.320
Or they think that if they can, you know, yeah, school shootings are horrible.
01:35:28.440
But just because people, real people are affected by something.
01:35:32.160
I mean, the reason we're talking about it is because people are affected.
01:35:35.120
The reason it's an issue in general is because people are affected.
01:35:37.640
And if you shut down dialogue, then what are people supposed to do?
01:35:40.920
So these emotional appeals that a lot of people have on the left and the right where they're
01:35:58.660
So we need to figure out a way to have a policy that makes sense.
01:36:04.360
It's also like we always want everyone else to do everything.
01:36:06.900
It's like the government, all of it is just society.
01:36:13.480
It's like some people act like everything should be different.
01:36:17.420
If it was supposed to be different right now, it would be different.
01:36:21.160
This is the best we can do to have one of the best societies in the world.
01:36:25.740
I wonder if sometimes my boomer parents might make fun of all the time, but like sometimes
01:36:28.560
my dad was right when he was just like, like every time somebody bring up politics, my father
01:36:38.060
Like, like he just like, like there's a certain level of like, if you're going to get in it,
01:36:46.020
But we can't have a society where every fucking human being is a cable news anchor.
01:36:50.480
We can't, I can't be in line at Starbucks and people are, you know, in a heated political
01:37:09.760
And it really, it gets so, it's such an addictive thing.
01:37:13.780
And it's funny, like the biggest addiction in the world right now really is people consuming
01:37:20.780
things that they, like, like the news, really media that they know is bad for them.
01:37:24.740
But they wake up and they go to it again and again.
01:37:30.660
And it's an, bro, that is an addiction because they do it to feed something inside of themselves.
01:37:36.320
They do it because it's easier for you to sit there and be angry, any of us, and I don't
01:37:40.380
mean someone, but all of us, it's easier for us to sit there and be angry than it is to
01:37:50.300
And I think people escape into this world instead of fixing the world that is very close
01:37:58.140
And it's hard to, it's hard to remember sometimes, but, but we try and think about that a lot
01:38:08.840
It's on YouTube and all the other places you'll get it.
01:38:11.940
And, uh, you know, we put it out once a week that we have a Patreon.
01:38:15.160
If you like it so much, want an extra episode, we do an extra episode a week.
01:38:18.920
And that is, uh, at the patreon.com, the Tim Dillon Show.
01:38:28.260
And, uh, that's, you know, the future until, you know, maybe forever.
01:38:32.360
But have you thought about coming out with a, a different type of show at some point?
01:38:43.640
Uh, well, I have a producer who, he chats sometimes every now and then he chats, but chime
01:38:48.420
in and, uh, he chats every now and then, but for the most part, he just sits there and
01:38:57.960
Nickel sometimes bring up his home state, you know, constantly or something.
01:39:01.260
Every now and then, Rogan's got to give Jamie Vernon a death stare.
01:39:05.640
Like, you want to get your head kicked off right now?
01:39:19.100
Now, I'm just floating on the breeze, and I feel I'm falling like these leaves.
01:39:30.340
Oh, but when I reach that ground, I'll share this peace of mind I found.
01:39:35.720
I can feel it in my bones, but it's gonna take a little time for me to set that parking brake and let myself unwind.
01:39:51.280
Shine that light on me I'll sit and tell you my stories Shine on me And I will find a song I will sing it just for you
01:40:14.020
And now I've been moving way too fast On a runaway train with a heavy load of my past
01:40:26.240
And these rails that I've been riding on They're worn so thin that they're damn near gone
01:40:37.340
Ladies and gentlemen, I'm Jonathan Kite, and welcome to Kite Club,
01:40:42.040
A podcast where I'll be sharing thoughts on things like current events, stand-up stories, and seven ways to pleasure your partner
01:40:54.480
And as always, I'll be joined by the voices in my head
01:41:12.140
Anyone who doesn't listen to Kite Club is a dodgy bloody wanker
01:41:17.320
Hi, I'll take a quarter pounder with cheese and a McFlurry
01:41:21.660
Sorry, sir, but our ice cream machine is broken
01:41:37.540
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