This Past Weekend with Theo Von - E292 Chelcie Lynn

00:00:00.320 Today's guest is hilarious. She makes me laugh. She makes me feel good.

00:00:05.800 You know, she's an uplifting gal.

00:00:08.200 And I'm just really just, I mean, I'm just tickled.

00:00:12.860 I am just tickled to have her.

00:00:16.020 It is comedian Chelsea Lynn. 0.94

00:00:30.000 Can you imagine a skull up between your legs?

00:00:55.380 I cannot, and very few women get to know what that's like. 0.93

00:00:58.300 I do.

00:01:00.000 Well, what air conditioner?

00:01:03.800 It's hot. I'm sweating.

00:01:05.120 Are you?

00:01:05.560 Yeah.

00:01:06.340 Well, I'm large. Thank you.

00:01:08.420 So I have an extra layer anyway, so I get hot.

00:01:11.120 But yeah, it's hot in here.

00:01:12.700 Is your, I know I've seen some of your family members that are more kind of a Rubenesque vibe.

00:01:17.180 Do you feel, do you, is your family just kind of a bigger family?

00:01:22.040 No. No, not at all.

00:01:25.480 I've got two sisters and an aunt and cousins, and that's really about it.

00:01:29.500 Yeah. Everybody else is dead.

00:01:31.140 Really?

00:01:31.780 Yeah.

00:01:32.800 Or just don't have relationships with them.

00:01:34.940 Yeah.

00:01:35.160 You know?

00:01:36.260 Yeah, yeah, yeah.

00:01:37.540 One or the other.

00:01:38.780 Dang.

00:01:39.340 Yeah.

00:01:39.600 No, my air conditioner went out yesterday.

00:01:44.280 So there's no air in here.

00:01:45.840 Oh, there's air.

00:01:47.080 I just turned it off.

00:01:49.140 Made it colder.

00:01:50.080 Oh, you did?

00:01:50.560 Just now, as you were seeing.

00:01:52.100 It'll be good. We'll just sweat the whole time.

00:01:54.100 Yeah, we're in no, there's no.

00:01:56.080 There's no rules to this.

00:01:57.400 Theo lost it in his apartment.

00:01:58.940 Yeah.

00:01:59.300 Oh, and it's been hotter than, this is like Texas heat.

00:02:04.940 Yeah, it's hot.

00:02:05.360 We're not used to this out here.

00:02:06.760 Well, it's bad, and I just didn't know what to do, so I got one of those floor fans, and

00:02:10.800 I took all the ice out of the freezer and put it right on the floor right in front of

00:02:14.500 it.

00:02:14.740 Did it work?

00:02:15.140 Like on a cookie sheet.

00:02:16.580 Did it work?

00:02:17.660 That's supposed to work.

00:02:19.280 I think it did something.

00:02:21.480 But you're used to luxury.

00:02:22.520 I'm not used to luxury, but I'm used to freaking having Eric and Dick.

00:02:27.060 Yeah, which is luxury.

00:02:29.040 Look, you know what, you really, I'll tell you this, the second went, an hour after it 0.99

00:02:33.100 went out, I was Googling like Native American shit. 0.99

00:02:36.960 You know what I'm saying? 0.99

00:02:37.980 I'm starting to see, I'm texting my mom, I'm like, aren't we part Cherokee or whatever?

00:02:42.060 I can't even handle, you know, just the lack of just.

00:02:46.780 Yeah, man.

00:02:47.540 Just the comfort.

00:02:48.900 For real. 0.99

00:02:49.540 And damn, I just feel bad. 0.99

00:02:51.640 Greg, my husband, bitches about the electric bill because I run the air 24-7. 0.99

00:02:55.980 Yeah. 0.98

00:02:56.620 I keep it on like 68. 0.66

00:02:57.700 He freaks the fuck out. 0.94

00:02:59.000 Yeah.

00:02:59.160 Okay.

00:02:59.600 My stepmom does that.

00:03:00.380 She's on pills though.

00:03:01.420 Oh, yeah.

00:03:02.200 That makes sense.

00:03:02.940 Yeah.

00:03:03.360 If you're on pills, dude, you gotta have.

00:03:05.480 Yeah.

00:03:05.740 I can't even.

00:03:07.520 Dude, nothing goes with a Percocet, like a little bit of air conditioning, you know?

00:03:10.780 Yeah, that makes sense for sure.

00:03:12.360 But I'm sorry I interrupted you.

00:03:13.600 Go on.

00:03:14.080 Oh, I don't even know what I was talking about.

00:03:15.060 But he, so he, you have the air conditioner going.

00:03:17.840 Oh, so that's what I, that's what I spend my money on.

00:03:21.400 Yeah.

00:03:21.760 Is air conditioning.

00:03:22.820 Yeah, definitely.

00:03:23.900 I'm dead serious.

00:03:25.840 Comfort.

00:03:26.660 Yeah.

00:03:26.860 Last summer, one of our bills was like $1,200 for the, yeah. 0.99

00:03:30.700 And I was like, he threw a, I was like, I don't give a fuck. 0.99

00:03:33.440 Yeah. 0.99

00:03:33.960 I'm comfortable.

00:03:35.180 Yeah.

00:03:35.320 That's all that matters.

00:03:36.480 We're doing it.

00:03:37.240 Yeah.

00:03:37.860 Oh, yeah.

00:03:38.180 Yeah.

00:03:38.500 If this is living large, this is living large, son.

00:03:41.020 Exactly.

00:03:41.600 I like that.

00:03:42.160 Yeah.

00:03:42.740 And you guys live in, um.

00:03:46.560 San Diego.

00:03:47.600 San Diego.

00:03:48.300 Yeah.

00:03:48.760 Yeah.

00:03:48.880 Because I saw you down there at the comedy store.

00:03:50.580 Yeah.

00:03:51.080 That's the first time, yeah, I ever knew about you.

00:03:53.600 So here's what happened.

00:03:54.560 Here's how I discovered you.

00:03:55.900 Okay.

00:03:56.820 So I was like, man, I want to go see some comedy.

00:03:59.200 I was like, let's, let's take a look.

00:04:00.760 You know, I looked up the comedy stores.

00:04:01.860 I was going, going through the schedule.

00:04:03.400 Didn't really see anybody that I knew.

00:04:05.200 Saw a picture of you. 0.99

00:04:06.240 I go, oh, he's cute as shit. 1.00

00:04:08.280 Oh, damn. 1.00

00:04:08.640 Let me YouTube. 0.99

00:04:10.100 See, see if, you know, I want to go see him. 0.99

00:04:12.280 First video, I was like, I'm buying fucking tickets. 0.99

00:04:14.840 Oh, dang. 0.99

00:04:15.140 Started following you on Instagram.

00:04:17.100 You had like 17,000 followers, maybe.

00:04:20.680 Oh, dang.

00:04:21.620 Yeah.

00:04:22.680 Started following you. 1.00

00:04:24.020 God, I was almost a damn shelter animal. 0.99

00:04:27.660 Went and saw you. 0.99

00:04:28.860 You were so fucking funny. 0.96

00:04:30.440 And afterwards were so fucking nice to me and my sisters. 0.91

00:04:33.700 I was like, forever fan. 0.99

00:04:36.300 Forever fucking fan, man. 0.99

00:04:38.220 That's sweet of you. 0.99

00:04:38.800 And then, yeah.

00:04:39.500 And then you blew up and now I'm on your podcast.

00:04:42.460 I'm freaking out.

00:04:43.340 I know.

00:04:43.720 It's so awesome.

00:04:44.220 Thanks for having me.

00:04:44.720 No, I'm so happy to have you.

00:04:46.520 And I'm glad.

00:04:47.080 I mean, I think we really lucked out even by having you on this week because I feel like

00:04:49.800 you're kind of having like a moment a little bit.

00:04:52.540 Is that crazy to say that?

00:04:53.680 I know that sounds really.

00:04:54.720 No, that's really.

00:04:55.480 For a lot of people, it's kind of coming out of the closet or whatever, but this is like 0.51

00:04:58.320 a, like a, like I saw you on Michael Bisping's damn Instagram and I'm just like, how are

00:05:04.100 all these worlds? 0.99

00:05:05.320 Kalani, he's damn British. 1.00

00:05:07.080 I went viral a couple of days ago. 0.99

00:05:08.920 You know, he's a one-eyed British man. 1.00

00:05:10.800 Dude, I don't know.

00:05:12.060 It's just, I'm just rolling.

00:05:13.200 I'm just rolling with it.

00:05:14.640 Yeah.

00:05:15.020 Day to day.

00:05:15.600 I have no idea what's happening.

00:05:16.840 I'm just like, all right, let's do this.

00:05:19.520 But, and you just hit a million on Instagram.

00:05:21.560 Yeah.

00:05:22.540 You know what?

00:05:23.640 Instagram hits different.

00:05:25.720 So I have a million on every.

00:05:27.520 On YouTube, I know.

00:05:28.600 Go on.

00:05:28.860 Sorry.

00:05:29.280 Everywhere else I have a million.

00:05:30.400 I just started TikTok and got a million on TikTok in like two months and I've posted

00:05:34.740 like four videos and I'm just kind of like, okay, million, whatever.

00:05:37.900 I don't really care.

00:05:39.020 Something about Instagram, man.

00:05:40.260 I'm like, I hit a million on Instagram.

00:05:42.220 I think it's harder to grow on Instagram.

00:05:44.940 People are stingy with that follow button.

00:05:47.480 Yeah.

00:05:47.900 People are a little stingy.

00:05:48.980 Yeah.

00:05:49.060 I think especially right like now, I feel like people have been, you know, I feel like

00:05:56.960 there's, it's, Instagram has been a while, around for a while now.

00:06:00.480 Yeah.

00:06:00.780 So it's not, you know, people aren't just as like, oh yeah, I'm getting, you know, I'm

00:06:04.000 in, I'm following anybody, you know, I'll follow any, you know, there was a time I'll 0.99

00:06:07.900 follow anybody with a damn tits. 1.00

00:06:09.440 Yeah. 1.00

00:06:09.720 Yeah. 0.99

00:06:10.360 I'll follow anybody that's not in a damn wheelchair. 1.00

00:06:12.580 You know what I'm saying? 0.99

00:06:13.120 My requirements were very slim at a certain point.

00:06:15.620 Right.

00:06:15.880 Yeah.

00:06:16.160 But now it's a little bit more, you know.

00:06:18.620 Yep.

00:06:19.260 Exactly.

00:06:20.480 But how did it feel good?

00:06:21.700 When did that happen?

00:06:22.580 When did you hit a million?

00:06:23.280 Like two days ago.

00:06:23.960 Wow.

00:06:24.580 Two days ago.

00:06:25.560 And what were y'all doing?

00:06:26.360 Where were you? 0.99

00:06:26.900 I mean, this is your damn fricking electronic JFK right here. 0.99

00:06:29.520 Oh gosh. 0.99

00:06:30.560 Just sitting on my couch in a muumuu, just watching Dateline.

00:06:34.240 Oh.

00:06:34.600 And I was like, oh, I had a friend text me and he was like, oh, congratulations on

00:06:37.700 a million.

00:06:37.940 I'm like, oh.

00:06:38.740 I knew it happened that day, but I was like, oh, I get on there.

00:06:41.820 I'm like, hey, look at that.

00:06:43.420 And that was pretty much it.

00:06:44.880 Everybody's like, hey, you're going to celebrate.

00:06:46.060 I'm like, celebrate? 0.98

00:06:47.620 Like, you know how people get balloons and shit? 0.95

00:06:49.440 Yeah. 1.00

00:06:50.380 I made fun of it a while back and my sister was going to get me balloons just to fuck 1.00

00:06:53.260 with me. 0.99

00:06:53.600 And I was like, you, I'll pop them. 1.00

00:06:55.140 Do not fucking get me. 0.99

00:06:57.020 Congratulations, balloons. 1.00

00:06:58.360 Holy shit. 0.99

00:06:59.120 That's embarrassing. 0.99

00:07:00.740 Do not.

00:07:01.800 I'll pop them.

00:07:02.560 Dude, there almost is.

00:07:04.800 Look, I think if you're getting congratulation balloons, you aren't doing enough with your

00:07:10.240 life. 0.99

00:07:10.640 I'm going to go out on a damn limb and say that. 0.99

00:07:12.780 Oh, my God. 0.99

00:07:13.460 Because anytime somebody needs to get you damn balloons to show that you have some kind 1.00

00:07:19.700 of damn achievement. 1.00

00:07:20.780 Holy shit. 1.00

00:07:21.860 That's funny. 0.99

00:07:22.520 Sometimes it's just, God, I don't know. 1.00

00:07:24.980 You see some fucktard walk over with a pack of balloons and a damn, you know. 1.00

00:07:29.940 And then my aunt one time, like, they have the little thing that's filled with a, it 0.99

00:07:34.380 has a balloon, another balloon that's empty.

00:07:36.200 Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

00:07:36.840 That's filled with something.

00:07:38.020 Confetti or, yeah, yeah, candy.

00:07:40.460 Yeah.

00:07:40.740 And she would open that.

00:07:42.520 And it's sand.

00:07:43.100 No, but it was just sand.

00:07:44.060 You know what I'm saying?

00:07:44.540 It was just like sand.

00:07:46.020 If you're buying a balloon in a balloon, you got money.

00:07:50.020 You got money.

00:07:50.880 That's not a regular balloon, you know.

00:07:52.960 Yeah, you definitely got money there.

00:07:55.300 But yeah, that had to be so wild.

00:07:56.760 But that's when I was just like, holy smokes, like, this is so crazy.

00:08:01.080 And it's so awesome that everybody starts to know about you, you know.

00:08:04.280 Yeah, it's super weird.

00:08:05.640 Because you're so funny.

00:08:09.520 And do you feel like your funny comes from where?

00:08:13.320 Like, because you weren't a stand-up to start with.

00:08:15.480 No, no. 0.98

00:08:18.580 So how did, yeah, let's do your origin story, damn it. 0.95

00:08:21.240 Yeah, where do you want to start? 0.99

00:08:23.000 Clark Kent, start in the damn mailroom. 0.99

00:08:24.980 Yeah, so, you know, I don't know where the funny comes from. 0.99

00:08:28.620 I think I had such a, I guess, a shitty childhood that I kind of had to, you know, I was the poor kid in school.

00:08:37.120 I was the large kid in school, you know, so I had to have something.

00:08:39.940 Yeah.

00:08:40.220 So I think that just, like, came out of me.

00:08:42.940 Probably early junior high.

00:08:44.940 Were you funny then?

00:08:46.080 Yeah, I think so.

00:08:47.040 Oh, I wish we had those videos.

00:08:48.680 Yeah, yeah.

00:08:49.580 I know.

00:08:50.480 I was thinking about that.

00:08:51.380 I was like, man, I wish I could vlog back then. 1.00

00:08:53.880 Oh, my God, to see that shit. 1.00

00:08:56.640 But, um. 1.00

00:08:57.060 So funny.

00:08:57.900 Where were you funny at?

00:08:59.060 Like, was there, like, an environment that you were kind of really shined in, you know?

00:09:03.640 Was it a particular place or with a certain group?

00:09:07.580 You know, I've always remembered this, and this may be cheesy as hell, but I remember the first time I made a room laugh.

00:09:13.680 And I was in seventh grade basketball practice.

00:09:20.460 And we, after practice. 1.00

00:09:21.280 Damn, sex symbol basketball? 1.00

00:09:22.880 Yeah. 1.00

00:09:23.460 Oh, yeah.

00:09:24.060 Wow.

00:09:24.460 Yeah.

00:09:25.300 And, uh, went back to the locker room.

00:09:29.520 Everybody's getting ready for class or whatever.

00:09:30.620 I don't even know what was said.

00:09:31.740 I have no clue.

00:09:33.020 But I had been to this school about a month.

00:09:35.460 So I didn't really know, you know. 1.00

00:09:37.720 And, um, I don't know what I said, but the whole fucking locker room was piss in their pants. 1.00

00:09:43.840 Yeah. 0.99

00:09:44.240 And somebody goes, she's funny.

00:09:45.880 And that always just stuck with me.

00:09:47.200 I'm like, oh.

00:09:48.020 You know, kind of.

00:09:48.940 So that was, like, the first time I remember, like, you know.

00:09:51.680 Wow.

00:09:52.400 Yeah.

00:09:53.260 Hmm.

00:09:54.100 Yeah, there's something magical.

00:09:55.280 When you're saying that, it makes me, it takes me back to those times.

00:09:58.140 Yeah, but, like, there's something magical when you don't feel like you have something

00:10:02.940 that people, that people see, you know.

00:10:07.120 And then when they say that you're funny, you're like, oh.

00:10:10.060 Yeah.

00:10:11.380 Oh, it's almost like, thank God, there's some, I have some way.

00:10:15.860 Yeah.

00:10:16.420 For people to see me, you know.

00:10:18.360 Do you ever say something, do you ever say something and then somebody dies laughing

00:10:22.120 and you didn't think it was funny?

00:10:23.780 But they thought it was the funniest thing they've ever heard in their life.

00:10:26.140 That happens to me all the time.

00:10:27.120 I'm like, I am not that funny.

00:10:28.820 And they're, like, dying.

00:10:30.580 Well, I think you start to become, well, some people start to become kind of, there's

00:10:35.660 times where I know I'm doing something funny and people don't know it yet.

00:10:39.680 That's always kind of fun when, like.

00:10:41.700 That's deep.

00:10:42.380 It's not that I'm doing it on purpose.

00:10:43.560 It's just I know my brain starts to see a pattern of, like, oh, this is where they're

00:10:48.640 at and this is where my brain is over here right now.

00:10:51.180 And so, in a second, this is all, you know, this corner is going to turn or something.

00:10:56.360 Yeah.

00:10:58.140 Sometimes, though, people like stuff.

00:11:00.300 Like, when I watch your videos, I notice a lot.

00:11:03.140 There's little things that I like.

00:11:06.080 Like when your cousin Jim, when that little fellow just turns his head at a certain angle. 0.99

00:11:10.100 And I just see the cut of that boy's just damn, where his neck just runs right into his damn 1.00

00:11:15.840 forehead. 0.99

00:11:16.720 You know, and I just.

00:11:17.440 I found that guy on Instagram.

00:11:18.800 God.

00:11:19.180 I flew him out to do a video.

00:11:20.440 I said, you got to come do a video with me.

00:11:22.100 I love that.

00:11:22.640 Just the look.

00:11:24.160 And then I love him.

00:11:25.320 And so, I think there's one thing that really, for me, about you is that you're, the people

00:11:32.920 you find funny, I find so funny that it's like, oh, wow, I can trust her on different

00:11:40.100 levels, not only to entertain me, but also, like, she sees, like, something that a lot

00:11:48.740 of people maybe wouldn't see.

00:11:50.040 You know, I mean, some people see this fellow little Jim and they might even, you know, 0.94

00:11:54.080 somebody probably damn molest him. 0.98

00:11:55.620 You know, you get a couple of damn, you know, positive football players. 1.00

00:11:59.180 Yeah. 0.99

00:11:59.360 Yeah.

00:11:59.840 Yeah.

00:12:00.360 For sure. 1.00

00:12:01.080 And they'll play damn fullback in a fucking haunted house with this dude, you know. 1.00

00:12:05.300 But, yeah, I think that's one of the things I notice as I see more of your stuff that makes 0.99

00:12:11.400 me laugh more, I think is like trusting that you're going to lead me also to something

00:12:16.800 funny, you know.

00:12:17.600 Oh, thank you. 0.99

00:12:18.940 And just the cuteness of it, like the damn aunt and just the. 1.00

00:12:23.280 There's a whole storyline to it and it's all made up on the spot, man. 0.99

00:12:27.400 And I just roll with it. 0.99

00:12:28.400 I try to remember the storyline for future shit. 1.00

00:12:31.000 It's just, it's just all fucking crazy. 0.99

00:12:35.240 It's so funny. 0.78

00:12:36.360 Yeah.

00:12:36.560 It's just such a good, you do, you do such a great job.

00:12:38.720 Thank you.

00:12:39.260 Of just bringing joy, especially during like the coronavirus time.

00:12:42.420 I feel like I've had such a tough time during all this of trying to like figure out what's

00:12:47.460 funny or be like, just be in the funny, you know.

00:12:50.560 Do you feel like it's been tougher during this time or do you feel like?

00:12:54.640 Opposite.

00:12:55.740 Opposite for me. 0.99

00:12:56.640 I feel like my, well, my shit's been thriving since, you know. 0.98

00:13:02.020 My creative's been thriving. 0.99

00:13:04.080 My, just everything for some reason, just total opposite for me.

00:13:09.340 Yeah.

00:13:09.660 I was supposed to go on tour.

00:13:12.060 Oh, you were going to.

00:13:13.040 And you, I don't know if you remember, but like two or three years ago we did the Josh

00:13:18.200 Wolfe.

00:13:18.660 Josh Wolfe show.

00:13:19.280 And do you remember me telling you, I was like, man, I don't know.

00:13:22.020 I don't know if I want to do standup.

00:13:23.440 I'm kind of scared.

00:13:24.260 And you were like, why?

00:13:25.640 And I was like, I don't know.

00:13:26.940 And you're like, just do it.

00:13:28.520 And I literally was like, I left and I was like, yeah, he's right.

00:13:32.480 And so I've literally started to standup because of that.

00:13:34.600 Oh, wow.

00:13:35.380 Yeah.

00:13:35.980 Isn't that crazy?

00:13:36.880 Yeah.

00:13:37.120 I can't believe it.

00:13:37.840 You were like, huh?

00:13:38.840 Huh?

00:13:39.060 No, just do it. 0.96

00:13:40.080 And I was like, he's fucking right. 0.95

00:13:42.300 Well, I think some people, it's like you want to, you just want to listen to the person. 0.97

00:13:46.200 You, you want to be a part of their world.

00:13:48.840 You know, they're bringing the joy.

00:13:51.040 You know, sometimes if people are selling jokes, sometimes people are selling joy, not

00:13:55.920 really selling it, but you know, I just feel like people want to be in your world, you

00:14:00.300 know, and once you create like a world, people want to be in it.

00:14:02.800 Yeah.

00:14:03.120 So that's great.

00:14:03.820 Then so you were planning on tour.

00:14:04.880 That's the thing I was going to ask you.

00:14:05.940 So, so with starting out, you started out where at, like just being funny, where'd you

00:14:10.900 grow up at?

00:14:11.960 Thackerville, Oklahoma.

00:14:13.180 Okay.

00:14:13.900 It's about 45 minutes north of Dallas.

00:14:16.240 It's right on the Oklahoma, Texas border.

00:14:17.800 Okay.

00:14:18.120 I graduated high school with 12 people. 0.99

00:14:19.840 Oh, damn. 1.00

00:14:20.960 Yeah. 1.00

00:14:21.860 12 people.

00:14:22.660 We did not have a football team.

00:14:23.860 We did not have band.

00:14:25.060 We did not have art, like nothing.

00:14:27.320 Did y'all have like a, like a youth group or something, a religious youth group?

00:14:32.540 Oh, yeah.

00:14:33.000 We had this thing called the upper room and my best friend's family ran it. 0.99

00:14:37.820 Damn. 0.99

00:14:38.480 Yeah. 0.99

00:14:39.000 And that was, that was all there was to do.

00:14:41.440 Play, play softball and go to the upper room.

00:14:43.420 And they just had like pool tables and, and Christian rock.

00:14:47.120 Oh, yeah.

00:14:47.680 You know what I'm talking about.

00:14:48.660 Yeah.

00:14:48.880 Yeah, dude.

00:14:49.860 And that was it.

00:14:50.940 That was, that was all I did.

00:14:53.800 For real.

00:14:53.940 That was fun.

00:14:54.640 That was a social life.

00:14:55.540 Oh, yeah.

00:14:56.240 And is Thackerville a big place or no?

00:14:58.280 Oh, no.

00:14:58.940 We've got, oh, when I was there, we didn't even have a stoplight.

00:15:02.560 Now there's a stoplight because we have the world's largest casino.

00:15:06.040 Ooh.

00:15:06.600 Yeah.

00:15:07.020 So it's random.

00:15:08.200 We have nothing but dirt roads, one convenience store.

00:15:12.740 That's it.

00:15:13.320 And then the world's largest casino.

00:15:14.980 Yeah.

00:15:15.580 Well, that's enough convenience, really.

00:15:17.240 I mean, it's, that's the thing, you know.

00:15:18.540 That's all you need.

00:15:19.920 Yeah.

00:15:20.280 You would think that's all you need.

00:15:21.640 People want more.

00:15:23.560 Yeah.

00:15:23.960 You know?

00:15:24.400 Yeah.

00:15:25.140 People, and some people need more, man.

00:15:26.760 Yeah.

00:15:27.480 That's true.

00:15:28.140 So Thackerville, so you graduated from there and then you went, because I was kind of,

00:15:32.600 it was kind of surprising when I saw you in San Diego, because I'm like, this doesn't

00:15:37.060 seem to fit everything, but everything works.

00:15:40.080 Yeah.

00:15:40.500 But it was surprising to me.

00:15:42.260 So, no.

00:15:43.120 Well, to me too.

00:15:44.280 So I graduated college, married Greg.

00:15:47.360 Okay.

00:15:47.680 We moved to Dallas.

00:15:48.680 So we were there for like three years.

00:15:49.880 He's looking for, he was looking for a new job.

00:15:53.140 Oh, God.

00:15:53.820 I was working at Whole Foods at the time.

00:15:55.380 Sound like a deadbeat, dude.

00:15:57.060 I was working at Whole Foods at the time in the bakery.

00:15:59.740 Come home from work and he's like, oh, I've got a job interview.

00:16:02.580 I'm like, that's great.

00:16:03.300 Where at?

00:16:03.660 And he was like, it's this job in San Diego. 0.99

00:16:05.700 And I was literally like, I thought he was fucking with me. 0.97

00:16:08.080 I'm like, why did you apply for a job in San Diego? 0.99

00:16:10.260 Yeah.

00:16:10.580 And he's like, I didn't.

00:16:12.340 A recruiter reached out.

00:16:13.500 And I'm like, we're not moving to San Diego.

00:16:16.140 That's called the military, Greg.

00:16:18.020 Yeah.

00:16:19.400 For real.

00:16:20.900 He's like, yeah, it's a unique group, you know, that they've been in business for a couple

00:16:25.620 hundred years.

00:16:26.420 They've reached out to me.

00:16:27.940 Yeah.

00:16:29.120 There's battleship opportunities.

00:16:32.220 So we moved to San Diego.

00:16:33.720 It's supposed to be temporary.

00:16:34.940 Wow.

00:16:35.300 And once I got out, once we got out here, I was like, I don't want to live anywhere else.

00:16:39.020 Really?

00:16:39.780 Yeah.

00:16:40.580 Yeah. 1.00

00:16:41.080 And then that's when shit started to pop for me. 0.99

00:16:44.180 Because that's a big move. 1.00

00:16:45.440 Yeah.

00:16:45.640 I mean, moving from a place where you have the comfort and you guys, especially going from

00:16:49.260 like into Dallas, that's a big move to go out west.

00:16:52.380 Oh, it was huge.

00:16:53.660 And then you get the shock of everything being more expensive out here, which is so true.

00:16:57.720 I think our one bedroom apartment was like $700 a month.

00:17:00.760 We come out here and it's like $2,200 for, you know what I mean?

00:17:03.580 We were like, yeah, it was a big shock.

00:17:06.440 We're used to it now.

00:17:07.300 Now, when we moved to San Diego, I had just started the social media stuff.

00:17:12.260 So I didn't really have a lot of followers.

00:17:14.500 And then it just slowly, we've been in San Diego seven years, almost eight maybe.

00:17:19.900 Yeah.

00:17:20.740 Yeah.

00:17:21.080 It's flown by.

00:17:22.160 Yeah.

00:17:22.380 And so with the social media, so you do the characters kind of, but a lot of it, you always

00:17:29.880 run into all of it.

00:17:31.340 It's always seems like a mix of you and the characters and just like a kind of a world kind

00:17:36.120 of, do you ever get like scared to try something new?

00:17:39.260 Are there things that you get afraid to try?

00:17:41.480 Oh yeah.

00:17:42.180 And not for me, but because people get pissed.

00:17:45.300 You know what I mean?

00:17:46.380 So I've, years ago, I tried to do a couple other characters besides Trailer Trash Tammy

00:17:50.680 and people.

00:17:51.120 Let's go to this.

00:17:51.600 We'll go to this video right here.

00:17:52.440 Just, I don't mean to interrupt you.

00:17:53.620 No, you're good.

00:17:54.260 But this, you know, we're trying to have Nick keep his job.

00:17:57.220 And so this is where he interjects good videos.

00:17:59.200 I'm a big fan of you and all your videos.

00:18:02.800 I watch them every day.

00:18:04.480 Also, your moon fangs.

00:18:06.040 My question is for you.

00:18:07.900 Are you scared to say something really outrageous or so outrageous that people might take offense

00:18:13.540 to it and you might get what we call cancel culture?

00:18:18.260 Let me know.

00:18:20.180 Bye.

00:18:21.100 Oh my God.

00:18:21.620 She's cute. 0.95

00:18:22.280 She is cute, huh? 0.92

00:18:23.540 Very cute.

00:18:24.720 I'm not like in terms of comedy, not afraid to say anything.

00:18:28.080 Like, I'll joke about whatever.

00:18:31.460 So in that way, I'm not, I guess I'm not scared to, but the cancel culture thing. 0.99

00:18:38.420 Holy shit. 0.99

00:18:39.860 Yeah. 1.00

00:18:40.360 You gotta, I mean, you gotta watch like, it's ridiculous.

00:18:43.740 I feel like you, yeah, that's on, that's definitely always on the back of my mind.

00:18:48.280 Is it yours? 0.99

00:18:49.360 I mean, all my, I didn't know all my friends were damn sex offenders, you know, until, 0.99

00:18:53.480 you know. 1.00

00:18:54.380 Holy shit. 1.00

00:18:55.700 Until Hollywood told me that they were. 0.99

00:18:57.580 You know, it surprised me with that.

00:19:01.240 I think it, here's when it gets scary for me.

00:19:03.700 So like I have a Netflix special that we're going to do sometime in when the world opens

00:19:08.560 back up.

00:19:09.020 So we have like a deal over there and trying to work on a cartoon right now.

00:19:13.540 And so I get scared of, I know that those are the things that are at risk for me.

00:19:19.740 Yeah.

00:19:20.140 So it's like, I can, you know, I can say whatever I want to say, but I have to, since those things

00:19:26.120 are on the other side of the teeter totter.

00:19:27.840 Yeah.

00:19:28.380 If it were just my podcast and just social medias, then I wouldn't, I think I wouldn't,

00:19:34.660 there wouldn't be anything on that other side of the teeter totter to lose.

00:19:36.800 Yeah.

00:19:37.240 Yeah.

00:19:37.580 But right now those are things where an article or something and then people get scared.

00:19:42.640 Mm-hmm.

00:19:44.300 And in the podcasting world, it's like, you know, some of the guys that something happens

00:19:48.440 and then people are like, well, why don't they still do their podcast?

00:19:52.380 And well, because the advertisers say, we don't want to be on this podcast right now.

00:19:56.540 And so then, you know, they just get, they get really nervous, I guess, as well, you

00:20:01.700 know, but anyway, so yeah, where does it, where, where does it hit with you?

00:20:07.600 Oh gosh, for me, so anything political, I don't mess with for multiple reasons, not really

00:20:14.520 because I'm scared of the cancel culture thing, but for me, it's like, you know, I, yeah, I

00:20:20.040 have a large platform and I've, and very rarely will people message me and say, you need to

00:20:24.200 use your platform for this or that 99.9% of people message me and say, thank you for

00:20:30.380 not, thank you for being a place where I can go and get away from that and laugh.

00:20:35.600 So that's the number one reason why I, I really, you know, try to stick with just comedy, nothing

00:20:43.220 too, you know, crazy political.

00:20:45.200 And, and it's not that I'm afraid of like the backlash or whatever.

00:20:48.420 It's just, you know, literally Dolly Parton is my, you know, and I'm just following her

00:20:55.640 footsteps.

00:20:56.300 She really keeps it like, you know, I'm just here to bring entertainment, bring laughs,

00:21:00.640 bring smiles. 1.00

00:21:01.340 I'm not here to, you can go to another page for that shit. 1.00

00:21:03.940 Yeah. 1.00

00:21:04.740 You know, here we're talking about titties. 0.96

00:21:06.980 Yeah. 0.99

00:21:07.440 Saggy titties. 0.98

00:21:08.120 You know what I mean? 0.99

00:21:08.640 Like that's all I'm here for.

00:21:09.960 Decent bags, baby.

00:21:10.980 Exactly.

00:21:11.640 Amen.

00:21:12.160 Yeah.

00:21:12.600 Something to hold a set of balloons down, you know?

00:21:14.560 There you go. 0.99

00:21:15.020 You need a big titty, something to hold down a set of damn get well balloons. 1.00

00:21:17.840 You know, you get these small titties, dude, you'll never get well. 0.99

00:21:22.440 No, no, exactly. 0.90

00:21:23.340 Dude, I remember my mother had the smallest breast, God forbid, and I love her.

00:21:27.040 And she listens to this podcast, which almost breaks my heart a lot of times, but, and makes

00:21:32.700 my heart at the same time. 0.98

00:21:35.480 But damn, she had them small. 0.99

00:21:37.740 I mean, you had to beat a little milk out of them. 1.00

00:21:39.940 Damn. 0.99

00:21:40.700 And so that's why I think I still got that nervous energy. 1.00

00:21:43.840 You know, you see a baby trying to just breastfeed off a small titty.

00:21:47.400 Yeah, there's nothing.

00:21:48.380 Yeah.

00:21:48.960 God, it'll break your heart.

00:21:50.500 Yeah.

00:21:51.060 You see a baby trying to shake it up.

00:21:51.960 You got to work hard for that milk.

00:21:53.460 Oh, you can't even shake a small tit.

00:21:55.880 Yeah.

00:21:56.380 Without hurting somebody's back.

00:21:58.100 Without hurting somebody's back.

00:22:00.040 It's just a different place, man.

00:22:01.820 Yeah, for sure. 0.96

00:22:01.920 It's just a damn different place. 0.97

00:22:03.360 For sure. 0.94

00:22:03.740 But yeah, one thing, so then I start to feel like this.

00:22:09.300 I start to feel like, well, as comedians, you're also supposed to, and this may be where

00:22:13.780 maybe the line gets a little different for me coming from a background more of stand-up

00:22:19.860 comedy, is that you're supposed to be able to comment on things.

00:22:24.640 You're supposed to be able to at least be able to take a swing at things without, you

00:22:32.680 know, without being judged just for taking a swing.

00:22:35.900 Yeah.

00:22:36.160 And so that's where it gets tricky for me sometimes with stand-up because it's like

00:22:39.420 you want to be able to kind of speak out or push the boundaries or, and then it really

00:22:45.040 starts to feel real, real limiting when your voice starts to get limited, you know?

00:22:51.840 But then maybe I'm like, I just need to start to be more creative.

00:22:55.060 I start to, you know, I'm finally starting to land in that place instead of the place

00:22:58.680 of, oh, this, you know, ah, you know, the frustration.

00:23:03.240 For, see, for stand-up comedy, I feel like it's, I feel like that's fine for sure to 1.00

00:23:09.380 push that shit. 0.98

00:23:10.940 I'm worried about like, oh, an old tweet or if I say something in a vlog, I really 1.00

00:23:16.040 have the, and not that I go around saying shit that would get me canceled anyway. 0.85

00:23:19.560 I don't. 0.98

00:23:20.220 Right. 1.00

00:23:20.680 I really don't, but you, you have to like, yeah, you have to like watch that shit if 0.99

00:23:24.700 you're, if you're doing stuff not only on the stage. 0.99

00:23:27.780 Does that make sense?

00:23:28.780 Like.

00:23:28.840 Oh, totally.

00:23:29.360 You know, like you, if you put yourself out there everywhere, stage, you just

00:23:33.220 YouTube, vlogging, Snapchat, like, I mean.

00:23:36.340 It just grows bigger, the possibility.

00:23:37.840 Yeah.

00:23:38.420 Yeah.

00:23:38.700 The possibility of more people getting offended as well.

00:23:41.920 Yeah.

00:23:42.140 Well, it's just, I mean, what if 10 years from now it's, they have semen lives matter, you 0.97

00:23:45.680 know, and anybody that ever swallowed after a blow job is going to jail. 1.00

00:23:49.660 You know what I'm saying?

00:23:49.980 It starts to make me think.

00:23:51.280 Mm-hmm.

00:23:52.060 Because we just don't know what the line is going to be in the future.

00:23:57.640 I know.

00:23:58.640 Did you see my Instagram story yesterday?

00:24:00.400 I don't know if you did.

00:24:01.140 I, uh, I had a lady come to the house to give me a massage that I found on the internet. 1.00

00:24:04.980 Oh God. 0.99

00:24:05.400 She was a crackhead. 1.00

00:24:06.580 Okay. 0.96

00:24:07.260 And so I made a whole Instagram story making fun of her and telling them what happened.

00:24:12.100 She passed out during my massage, but it's a whole thing.

00:24:14.340 Mm-hmm.

00:24:14.960 And when, you know, people don't make fun of her.

00:24:17.240 Is it up right now?

00:24:18.020 Yeah.

00:24:18.520 Let's watch it. 0.98

00:24:18.980 And I literally said, I'm going to make fun of whatever the fuck I want to make fun of. 0.98

00:24:23.080 I like that. 0.97

00:24:23.260 It's long, but yeah, yeah, yeah.

00:24:24.740 Yeah.

00:24:25.440 I decided to splurge and find someone to come to the house and give a massage. 1.00

00:24:30.020 Look, I've been on this site and so has Nick, to be honest with you.

00:24:33.940 Back page.

00:24:35.020 Yeah.

00:24:36.460 R.I.P.

00:24:37.240 Back page as well.

00:24:38.300 And now you have to do adult friend search.

00:24:40.400 But thankfully I have blockers on my phone now, so I'm doing well.

00:24:43.440 Well, that's not what I got.

00:24:45.100 Let's see what you got. 1.00

00:24:45.840 I got a fucking crackhead. 1.00

00:24:47.300 Amen. 1.00

00:24:48.520 Photo was old.

00:24:49.900 She on crack now.

00:24:51.040 Yes.

00:24:51.460 The bait and switch.

00:24:52.340 I've done that.

00:24:52.760 She got me.

00:24:53.560 Catfish me.

00:24:54.320 Yeah, dude.

00:24:54.980 Yeah, she got me.

00:24:56.480 You couldn't even hardly understand her when she talked.

00:24:58.540 Aussie Osborne.

00:24:59.500 Oh, man.

00:25:00.300 But then she, so she comes in and I'm immediately weirded out.

00:25:03.480 I almost tell her I'll pay her for her time, but she's got to bounce. 0.98

00:25:06.640 I've done that before as well, dude.

00:25:08.780 And that is, bro, I've been so scared.

00:25:11.700 I went in, dropped the $300 off the balcony down to the woman. 1.00

00:25:16.540 Holy shit. 0.99

00:25:17.800 Like it was some kind of freaking, just some kind of bootleg Mardi Gras. 1.00

00:25:21.160 Oh, my God. 1.00

00:25:24.200 So I'm like, fuck it. 1.00

00:25:25.400 Let's just see what happens. 1.00

00:25:26.440 There we go.

00:25:26.980 That's what I like, that entrepreneurial spirit.

00:25:28.660 Um, then she tells me that she left her phone and purse in his car and she forgot to tell

00:25:34.740 him when to be back.

00:25:35.600 She, she, she, her car broke down.

00:25:37.200 So somebody dropped her off. 0.98

00:25:38.380 Another crackhead. 0.99

00:25:39.460 Oh, yeah. 1.00

00:25:40.360 She's got that muscular pimp. 1.00

00:25:41.760 If she's out there giving massages. 0.80

00:25:43.140 Yeah.

00:25:43.720 Asked if she can log into her Facebook somewhere and message him.

00:25:46.220 So you didn't take any pictures of her though.

00:25:48.120 No.

00:25:48.700 Well, see now then I think that that's totally fine.

00:25:50.900 Oh no.

00:25:51.380 Oh yeah.

00:25:51.860 I didn't post pic.

00:25:52.620 No, no, no, no, no.

00:25:53.280 You weren't blasting her.

00:25:54.600 No, no, no, no, no.

00:25:55.980 But the story is hilarious.

00:25:57.500 She, she fell asleep on me during my massage and was still massaging me. 1.00

00:26:01.040 Oh God.

00:26:01.400 She passed out on me and was still massaging me. 1.00

00:26:03.980 And that's crack, baby.

00:26:05.120 Yeah, that's crack.

00:26:06.280 I said, I said, are you good?

00:26:07.700 And she, and she still laying on me goes, yeah, why?

00:26:10.660 I say, cause you're, you're laying on me.

00:26:12.600 Yeah.

00:26:13.100 And she goes, oh yeah, these are new clothes. 0.80

00:26:15.780 Something a crackhead would say.

00:26:17.560 Well, that's called, they used to call it crackstruction, dude.

00:26:19.780 So they used to have people that would do crack and they would come and build, like

00:26:24.480 in our area.

00:26:25.160 They had a group of young men that would do crack and you'd see them out there zombied

00:26:28.360 out, but still building.

00:26:29.980 Dude, I saw a guy, speaking of building, I saw a guy on crack one time at a, uh, build

00:26:33.620 a bear and he zoned out, bro.

00:26:36.900 Zero eyes open, you know, zero out of two eyes open.

00:26:41.320 And he's still.

00:26:41.980 And he's building his bear?

00:26:42.580 And he still made that bear.

00:26:43.780 Wow. 1.00

00:26:44.720 Damn. 1.00

00:26:46.440 That's funny. 1.00

00:26:47.460 And he still made that bear, dude.

00:26:49.140 He got the bow right in the middle.

00:26:51.700 Um, he did it all.

00:26:53.460 Even the little, where you put the one, two, three on the feet.

00:26:56.440 Yeah.

00:26:56.960 God, he did it on each.

00:26:57.720 And passed out the whole time.

00:26:59.220 Unconscious.

00:27:01.580 Completely unconscious, dude.

00:27:02.720 Like if you put that dude right now in a court of law with the hand, one hand on the

00:27:07.020 Bible or, or even just a Berenstain Bears book, you know, whatever meant more to him.

00:27:11.520 And you asked him, Hey bugaboo, you know, did you ever build a bear?

00:27:15.600 Unconscious.

00:27:15.880 Unconscious.

00:27:16.320 I bet he would lie about it.

00:27:18.900 And he would lie unknowingly.

00:27:20.460 Oh man. 1.00

00:27:21.740 Oh, that's good shit. 1.00

00:27:23.720 Good times. 1.00

00:27:26.180 So what else?

00:27:27.620 We got some questions that came in.

00:27:29.100 Yeah.

00:27:29.600 And I'm not giving up on my ability to conversate with you yet.

00:27:32.900 Oh, you're good.

00:27:33.680 Okay, good.

00:27:34.380 Hey, I'm having fun.

00:27:35.360 Are you?

00:27:36.100 Yeah.

00:27:36.600 I'm so glad you're here.

00:27:37.680 This is so cool.

00:27:38.480 Oh, thank you.

00:27:39.180 I'm surprised people sent questions in.

00:27:43.340 That's, that's great.

00:27:44.640 Yeah.

00:27:44.880 We got a lot.

00:27:45.440 Didn't we?

00:27:45.700 Yeah.

00:27:46.080 Like 15.

00:27:47.140 Some are like kind of the same old hat, but yeah, we got a lot for you.

00:27:50.380 Okay.

00:27:51.600 What's up, Tammy?

00:27:52.440 What's up, Theo?

00:27:53.140 Quick question.

00:27:53.820 What was your first experience with tobacco?

00:27:55.660 Was it that cowboy killer or was it that smokeless lip filler gang gang nicotine buzz?

00:28:02.980 Oh, yeah.

00:28:04.540 And a fellow with a nice body there, too, bro. 0.77

00:28:07.480 No homo, dog. 1.00

00:28:08.220 Great tank top.

00:28:09.400 Beautiful young fellow right there.

00:28:10.860 Two arms.

00:28:11.700 Yeah. 0.99

00:28:12.420 Where I'm from, that's a damn highlight reel, bro. 0.99

00:28:14.000 Two arms, one eyebrow. 0.99

00:28:15.300 Oh, you show up with two arms, dog?

00:28:17.640 You know what I'm saying?

00:28:18.660 He's cute. 1.00

00:28:19.360 Oh, somebody's getting married in this motherfucker, bro. 1.00

00:28:22.600 You know? 1.00

00:28:24.080 I've never smoked.

00:28:25.120 Have you smoked?

00:28:26.260 No, no, no.

00:28:26.800 I mean, I've tried it, but I've never like been a smoker.

00:28:29.380 Oh, yeah.

00:28:29.980 I'm six months off of cigarettes right now.

00:28:31.540 Okay, okay.

00:28:32.520 Um, my grandma and parent, everyone around me growing up, chain smokers.

00:28:38.280 No.

00:28:38.640 So I, you know, as a little kid would like try, nah.

00:28:42.240 What did they smoke?

00:28:43.340 Do you remember what kind?

00:28:44.720 Well, grandma had to get that jacket. 1.00

00:28:47.440 Mm-hmm.

00:28:47.880 So Marlboro.

00:28:50.320 It was miles, boy.

00:28:51.900 Yeah.

00:28:52.720 Yeah.

00:28:53.220 We were always decked out in Marlboro, everything, head to toe.

00:28:56.580 That's how much she smoked.

00:28:57.500 God, I love that.

00:28:57.900 And you had to smoke like $20,000 worth of cigarettes to get a jacket.

00:29:01.820 Yeah.

00:29:02.000 And we had closets full.

00:29:03.480 Wow.

00:29:03.880 You know?

00:29:04.480 Yeah.

00:29:05.160 Those jackets.

00:29:05.840 Yeah, those are some prize pieces back in the day.

00:29:07.860 Oh, yeah.

00:29:08.500 Oh, yeah.

00:29:08.860 If you saw that, it was, the adults did the Marlboros and the children did those Kool-Aid

00:29:12.760 points that were on the back of the little Kool-Aid packets.

00:29:14.620 Yeah.

00:29:15.500 Mm-hmm.

00:29:16.040 And we'd save up and get a picture.

00:29:17.420 Every year, we'd have a family meeting, and we'd do what we wanted to do with the points,

00:29:21.320 you know?

00:29:22.000 Man.

00:29:22.560 And you could get a little picture. 0.99

00:29:23.700 You could get a little, one year, we spent all of them, got my little sister a damn vest, 1.00

00:29:28.060 dude, and that thing was a piece of shit. 1.00

00:29:29.560 Oh, it wasn't nice? 1.00

00:29:31.060 I mean, it was-

00:29:31.860 You'd think a vest would be nice.

00:29:33.620 You would think.

00:29:35.360 And no. 1.00

00:29:36.080 Damn. 0.99

00:29:36.960 It was just, I don't know. 0.99

00:29:38.360 It was almost like a discontinued life jacket, you know, that they were marking in his clothing.

00:29:46.680 No.

00:29:47.440 No.

00:29:48.040 They can't do that.

00:29:49.280 They could, man.

00:29:50.060 Yeah, they got you.

00:29:50.700 They got you.

00:29:51.500 They got you.

00:29:52.180 They got us.

00:29:53.080 But, yeah, those Marlboros, and so your family would just smoke them?

00:29:56.480 Oh, yeah.

00:29:57.660 And what would you do?

00:29:58.500 Just watch them?

00:29:59.200 Yeah.

00:29:59.720 Oh, wow.

00:30:00.380 That was like, we had no cable, so what else were we going to do, you know?

00:30:03.000 Oh, yeah.

00:30:04.160 Let's watch grandma's cheeks turn green. 0.69

00:30:07.160 You know, we had channels 10 and 12.

00:30:08.840 We got tired of soap operas, so we just sat there and watched them smoke.

00:30:11.680 What soap operas were y'all watching?

00:30:13.460 Oh, gosh.

00:30:15.560 We used to watch like The Days of Our Life. 1.00

00:30:18.280 Just all that shit. 1.00

00:30:19.800 Oh, yeah. 1.00

00:30:20.780 Guiding Light.

00:30:21.120 Literally, that's all there was.

00:30:22.780 Guiding Light as well as hers.

00:30:24.500 Yep, yep.

00:30:25.140 We watched them all.

00:30:26.160 Santa Barbara, that was an old one.

00:30:27.620 My sister still watches them.

00:30:29.520 I haven't watched them since high school, but she still watches them.

00:30:32.300 That's really interesting.

00:30:33.660 Dedicated.

00:30:34.320 Yeah.

00:30:34.560 Yeah.

00:30:34.920 That can really lead to loneliness as well.

00:30:37.620 Yeah.

00:30:38.260 Here's a young lady right here that has a question. 0.91

00:30:45.500 Lauren, Virginia, love you both.

00:30:47.620 If you didn't like my last question, here's another question.

00:30:51.360 Theo, one time you said that you have like a nose power when you go into a public bathroom.

00:30:56.460 You can tell if someone just took a dump or not.

00:31:00.160 I think a lot of people have that power, but what's worse than that is if you go into the

00:31:06.560 female bathroom after a girl who's currently going through the time of the month, that smell 1.00

00:31:15.920 is worse than poop. 0.98

00:31:17.180 Chelsea, since you're a girl and you can attest to that, tell Theo what's up. 0.96

00:31:21.800 Plus, you know because apparently your sister's got a little funky. 1.00

00:31:24.840 Love you both.

00:31:27.040 Thank you so much for being so funny and awesome.

00:31:29.660 Bye.

00:31:30.540 Aw.

00:31:31.540 Dang.

00:31:32.180 So, yeah.

00:31:33.700 Is that a real thing?

00:31:34.780 Because I've always had this superpower and it's a, I mean, I guess some people say it's

00:31:38.020 not a superpower, but if I go into a bathroom, if someone has been doing poop in there, I

00:31:43.920 can tell immediately when I walk in.

00:31:45.520 Oh, I can usually smell it in the hallway.

00:31:47.140 Oh my God.

00:31:47.960 Yeah.

00:31:48.060 Really?

00:31:48.560 Oh, yeah.

00:31:49.660 God, dude. 1.00

00:31:50.340 You might be a damn. 1.00

00:31:51.880 You might be from Egypt or something. 1.00

00:31:54.500 Yeah.

00:31:55.160 So, the whole female thing, it smells like you walked into a room that has a pile of a 1.00

00:32:02.400 million pennies. 0.78

00:32:03.580 Oh my God.

00:32:05.240 Like a bank?

00:32:05.940 Like a little bad bank?

00:32:06.920 Like a little, like the back of the bank that holds all the coins.

00:32:10.320 Oh.

00:32:11.040 Yeah.

00:32:11.320 It's like a copper smell mixed in with some funk.

00:32:16.040 Oh.

00:32:16.620 Yeah. 1.00

00:32:17.120 So, y'all just have shit. 1.00

00:32:18.820 We have shit and blood. 1.00

00:32:20.240 Oh. 1.00

00:32:20.900 So.

00:32:21.480 It's very, yeah, very, kind of like Vietnam. 0.75

00:32:24.960 Yeah.

00:32:26.400 Kinda.

00:32:27.600 If you think about it. 1.00

00:32:29.180 Damn. 0.99

00:32:30.080 I never thought about that. 0.99

00:32:31.300 And so, you know, when you walk in there, you know if that's been going on?

00:32:34.380 Yeah.

00:32:34.900 Well, here's the deal.

00:32:36.400 Oh my God. 0.99

00:32:36.540 Like they'll, well, that's why, okay, that's if she wore a pad and it's soaked up in fucking 0.99

00:32:43.060 a gallon of blood and then leaves it in the trash. 0.99

00:32:47.880 Okay.

00:32:48.720 Relax, man.

00:32:49.780 At least drop it off at the fire department on the steps.

00:32:52.520 Good.

00:32:53.220 What is going on around here?

00:32:55.880 Hey, this is real life.

00:32:57.340 You did not know about this?

00:32:58.980 I didn't know about this, man.

00:33:01.300 Yeah. 1.00

00:33:01.980 Women are disgusting. 1.00

00:33:03.400 I knew that, but I didn't know that people are just abandoning potential families. 1.00

00:33:10.840 Yeah.

00:33:11.500 Okay.

00:33:12.600 On that little family pinata, I didn't know people are just abandoning those things.

00:33:17.440 Oh God, that's gross. 0.99

00:33:19.680 Just curbside in the damn bathroom. 1.00

00:33:22.720 Nasty. 1.00

00:33:22.920 At least throw it out the window on the interstate. 0.94

00:33:26.620 Yeah. 1.00

00:33:26.880 Like a damn fucking adult. 1.00

00:33:30.960 Oh my God. 1.00

00:33:32.140 I'm sorry y'all are going through that.

00:33:33.460 I didn't know that.

00:33:34.980 Yeah.

00:33:36.080 That's why I'm quick to use the men's bathroom. 0.94

00:33:38.260 I'll just use the men's bathroom. 0.97

00:33:39.520 Like I'll have no problem.

00:33:40.900 And the men's bathroom is usually empty and the women's is always full.

00:33:44.820 If there's a line, I'll go to the men's. 1.00

00:33:46.260 I don't give a fuck. 0.99

00:33:47.540 Well, it's really, you know, it's really a strong move when you say that because nowadays 1.00

00:33:51.000 if I see a woman in there, I leave. 1.00

00:33:53.320 I don't want to be sex crime.

00:33:54.800 I don't want to be me too.

00:33:56.620 I don't want to be, I'm just afraid of everything.

00:33:59.360 So it's like, it's yours now.

00:34:00.900 You know, I'll go out there and write a W.O. on the fucking door. 1.00

00:34:04.060 No, if it's like a big men's bathroom with like urinals and stalls and there's other men, 0.99

00:34:07.520 like I won't like, but if it's like a single,

00:34:09.800 you know what I'm talking about?

00:34:10.300 Like a gas station bathroom with one and there's one, you know, and the women's is full. 1.00

00:34:13.700 I'll go to the men's, but I won't walk in there and walk up beside a urinal and, you know, 1.00

00:34:17.860 take a, no, no, no, no.

00:34:18.640 But you know what I'm talking about?

00:34:19.560 If it's like a single, I'll use the men's. 1.00

00:34:21.160 I don't give a shit. 0.99

00:34:21.860 Wow. 1.00

00:34:22.220 Yeah.

00:34:22.760 I like that.

00:34:23.580 Yeah.

00:34:24.320 And do you all, have you guys ever been to the bathrooms at the Dallas Cowboys stadium

00:34:27.900 or not?

00:34:28.320 I've never been.

00:34:29.460 How are they?

00:34:30.240 I've never been.

00:34:31.700 Your husband's here and he didn't take you there?

00:34:33.480 No, he hates the Cowboys. 1.00

00:34:35.140 Oh, damn. 1.00

00:34:35.880 But at least take her to the damn place. 1.00

00:34:37.320 That's true. 1.00

00:34:37.920 That's true.

00:34:38.440 You know what I'm saying, dude? 1.00

00:34:39.840 I fucking hate a claim jumper, but I've been to that bitch three times. 1.00

00:34:45.600 That's true. 1.00

00:34:46.660 Yeah.

00:34:47.780 No.

00:34:48.460 Are they nice?

00:34:49.780 They are the biggest bathrooms I've ever seen.

00:34:53.580 There's four rooms before you get to anything that has water in it.

00:34:57.840 Wow.

00:34:59.060 I mean, well, that's good.

00:35:00.360 I mean, there's no, I'm sure the lines are non-existent.

00:35:03.920 Yeah.

00:35:04.620 Oh.

00:35:05.840 There's, I mean, it's crazy.

00:35:07.400 It's just, anyway, just when you started talking about size of restrooms, it really, it took

00:35:11.720 me to another level.

00:35:12.780 Yeah.

00:35:13.220 I thought about that.

00:35:14.340 Yeah.

00:35:14.660 We got to go, babe.

00:35:15.900 Y'all do?

00:35:16.780 No, no, no.

00:35:17.420 I meant to the stadium.

00:35:18.620 Oh, okay.

00:35:19.940 I ain't leaving. 1.00

00:35:20.860 You got to kick my ass out. 1.00

00:35:22.140 Well, we will in about 45 minutes. 1.00

00:35:24.820 Is that it?

00:35:25.760 Look, that's just one room.

00:35:27.280 Yeah.

00:35:28.040 Wow.

00:35:28.440 Can you see any other rooms, Nick?

00:35:29.580 That is pretty nice.

00:35:30.340 That's nice.

00:35:32.840 That is cool.

00:35:34.180 It's not a lot.

00:35:35.600 Okay.

00:35:36.360 Maybe they won't let you tape it or anything.

00:35:37.560 They want to keep it a secret.

00:35:39.520 But it is just, it's really, it's really high end.

00:35:44.160 It's like the magic castle of toiletry.

00:35:46.880 What, what is, so what's kind of like, do you, do you see yourself now?

00:35:51.420 Like, obviously, you know, you got a lot of people interested.

00:35:55.940 Do you feel any new pressure?

00:35:57.700 Do you feel, do you feel anything like that?

00:36:00.600 Or do you feel pressure?

00:36:02.280 Do you feel inspiration?

00:36:03.620 Like, what do you kind of feel, if anything?

00:36:07.220 Probably fear more than anything.

00:36:12.700 I don't feel pressure.

00:36:17.080 It's just a little scary to me.

00:36:18.980 And not in a bad way.

00:36:20.240 I'm not like, you know, it's just, I don't know how to explain it.

00:36:23.460 Like, it's just, it's weird.

00:36:26.640 You know what I mean?

00:36:27.400 Like, it's weird.

00:36:28.480 I never expected any of this.

00:36:31.900 You know, fame scares me.

00:36:33.380 Money scares me.

00:36:34.580 I'm, I'm pretty happy and content.

00:36:37.020 So those things change people or can change people.

00:36:41.080 So I'm scared of that.

00:36:42.300 It's just all kind of like, I'm trying to just, does that make sense?

00:36:46.660 Do you feel, how do you feel about that?

00:36:48.720 Yeah.

00:36:49.360 Yeah.

00:36:49.640 I mean, it's scary to me.

00:36:51.720 It's scary.

00:36:52.320 Yeah, money's scary.

00:36:55.880 Popularity is scary.

00:36:59.980 Money's kind of scary because I feel like I never had any money and I don't, and I just don't, I think I always judged people with money as well.

00:37:11.580 And so then when you start to make some money, you're like, damn, those people were just, you know, I don't want to be the same way that I felt like those people were towards me maybe.

00:37:21.660 Yeah. 0.54

00:37:22.060 But also just realizing like those people were just people probably trying to do their best.

00:37:27.580 Yeah, it's, it's, it's definitely kind of scary.

00:37:31.720 Will people look at you differently?

00:37:33.320 Yeah.

00:37:33.820 You know, it's like, especially coming from, I feel like some of the environments maybe you and I are from where, you know, it always, the people with money were always kind of the bad guy felt like.

00:37:44.860 Yeah.

00:37:45.200 And maybe that's just my perception.

00:37:46.400 No, I can definitely see that.

00:37:48.280 But rich people do. 1.00

00:37:49.540 You went over to somebody's house and they had, you know, curtains, you know, and you're like, these motherfuckers. 1.00

00:37:55.960 Yeah. 1.00

00:37:56.880 Yeah.

00:37:57.280 No, I was, I was about to say, it's not even like where we're from.

00:38:01.100 It's not even like rich people.

00:38:02.700 It's like people that lived in like a three bedroom, two bath brick house with a trampoline in the backyard was rich to me.

00:38:10.320 Oh, that was, you had money.

00:38:12.740 Yeah.

00:38:13.000 Okay.

00:38:13.480 If you have a minivan parked out front, you have money. 0.99

00:38:17.260 Dude, if my, this kid, Brandon broke his fucking head open on a stack of bricks that were next to their trampoline. 1.00

00:38:24.500 And I was like, you rich piece of shit. 1.00

00:38:26.940 Cause he had a stack of bricks. 1.00

00:38:28.460 And yeah, cause he had that trampoline.

00:38:29.540 Cause that meant they were building something and you had money.

00:38:32.440 Yeah.

00:38:32.580 Yeah.

00:38:32.740 I was just like, oh, must be tough, dude. 1.00

00:38:34.800 Splitting your head open on some fucking high end textiles, you piece of shit. 1.00

00:38:39.060 You know? 1.00

00:38:40.180 Yeah, I do.

00:38:41.500 So yeah, I think I had so much judgment sometimes against that whole universe that it makes me feel just way uncomfortable.

00:38:52.840 You know, I've still live in the same apartment I've been in for the past seven, seven years.

00:38:56.320 And so I'm just afraid sometimes to spend any money.

00:39:00.560 Yeah.

00:39:01.060 I get scared.

00:39:01.900 I get scared to give Nick a raise.

00:39:05.780 No, I feel the exact same way.

00:39:08.100 I honestly do.

00:39:08.920 Greg drives a truck that has a half a million miles on it.

00:39:11.920 He refuses to get a new truck. 0.99

00:39:13.420 Although he just bought a brand new fucking $70,000 Roadrunner. 0.99

00:39:18.600 But. 0.99

00:39:19.700 Roadrunner?

00:39:20.160 What is that?

00:39:21.000 Oh, like a Mopar Roadrunner?

00:39:23.440 Like a 69 Roadrunner?

00:39:25.280 68.

00:39:25.780 68.

00:39:26.580 Let's get a picture of that.

00:39:27.620 Yeah.

00:39:28.200 It just sounds like.

00:39:29.340 But he, I mean.

00:39:30.520 Some of y'all are going to split in the divorce.

00:39:32.040 Yeah. 1.00

00:39:32.260 I'll show you this damn picture. 1.00

00:39:36.020 Yeah. 1.00

00:39:36.860 Same thing.

00:39:37.500 Like we're, we're afraid to.

00:39:38.380 And you know, I don't have a million dollars in the bank, but I'm making more than I ever

00:39:40.840 have.

00:39:41.320 Yeah.

00:39:41.860 Oh, wow.

00:39:42.260 That is beautiful.

00:39:43.400 And it's blue too.

00:39:43.860 Just like that.

00:39:45.280 Oh, no.

00:39:45.860 That is nice, dude.

00:39:47.060 Yep.

00:39:47.380 That's it.

00:39:48.000 That is something. 0.99

00:39:48.740 I'll fricking let you hickey my butt in that thing. 1.00

00:39:51.260 I thought you were talking about that thing at Brennan Shaw. 1.00

00:39:53.180 I hope you should drive that damn, look like a big mosquito. 1.00

00:39:56.940 Oh. 1.00

00:39:58.580 Yeah.

00:39:58.960 That's nice.

00:39:59.680 Oh, that's beautiful.

00:40:00.920 Yeah.

00:40:01.060 We just splurged.

00:40:02.380 Wow.

00:40:02.840 And is it run yet?

00:40:03.760 Do you guys have it running?

00:40:04.560 Yeah.

00:40:04.800 It's a race car.

00:40:06.160 Dang.

00:40:06.800 So he doesn't drive it.

00:40:07.880 Yeah.

00:40:08.240 It's been sitting in our driveway for eight months.

00:40:11.220 So what is it about being down there and saying, oh, wait, you don't drive it at all

00:40:15.060 yet?

00:40:15.520 No, not that.

00:40:16.460 That's, that's, it's not street legal.

00:40:17.900 Okay.

00:40:18.560 Yeah.

00:40:18.880 So what'll make it street legal?

00:40:20.820 He won't.

00:40:21.500 He's going to take it to the, he's going to take it to the, he's going to take

00:40:23.160 it to the strip, start racing it. 0.91

00:40:24.980 Hell yeah.

00:40:25.560 Yeah.

00:40:26.100 And that'd be great for some Tammy videos. 0.99

00:40:28.240 Dude, I would like to go sit in one, one of those.

00:40:30.820 Yeah.

00:40:31.900 I want to be there.

00:40:33.240 It'll be fun.

00:40:34.260 I want to be just that, like, I want to be medieval Knievel.

00:40:38.320 You know what I'm saying? 0.99

00:40:40.060 I want to be on a dirt bike, but with a damn Lance. 0.99

00:40:43.140 Oh, and with that mullet. 1.00

00:40:44.520 Yeah.

00:40:44.820 Oh yeah.

00:40:45.400 Yeah.

00:40:45.620 Let the Lord fricking work. 0.52

00:40:47.640 Yes.

00:40:48.280 Yes.

00:40:49.960 What is it you feel like about being down there in San Diego and in that area?

00:40:53.160 I really like it because it's still California, but it's not LA.

00:40:57.220 I don't know if I could live in LA.

00:40:58.900 Yeah.

00:40:59.500 It's hectic.

00:41:00.120 You're not missing it.

00:41:00.580 Oh yeah.

00:41:02.140 Oh, just the weather. 0.99

00:41:05.160 I know that's stupid to say, but like, you know, Texas was miserable and you're hardly 0.99

00:41:09.800 ever miserable in San Diego. 0.99

00:41:12.160 The taco shops.

00:41:13.740 It's just, I just love it.

00:41:15.320 I don't think it would take a lot to get us to move.

00:41:18.220 I think if we were to move anywhere else, it would be Austin.

00:41:20.720 Yeah.

00:41:21.100 Austin area.

00:41:23.220 Which, you know, we're going back to the heat, but I love the Austin area.

00:41:26.640 But I'm, I think we're going to be here for the rest of our lives.

00:41:29.540 Hopefully San Diego.

00:41:30.780 Wow.

00:41:31.140 I just love it.

00:41:32.180 And do you guys have offspring?

00:41:33.760 Are y'all fertile or anything like that?

00:41:35.080 No, we're fertile. 0.52

00:41:36.000 Okay.

00:41:36.400 So that's a choice.

00:41:37.580 Yeah.

00:41:38.580 Yeah.

00:41:39.200 No, thanks.

00:41:40.100 No, thanks for now.

00:41:41.040 Maybe.

00:41:41.480 I don't know.

00:41:42.020 I keep saying, oh, in five years, we've been married.

00:41:44.680 Oh my gosh.

00:41:46.140 11 years.

00:41:47.440 And I'll say, oh, let's wait three or four years and come back and see.

00:41:50.860 And then every three or four years, we're like, no, no.

00:41:53.940 And let's wait three, you know?

00:41:55.140 So, and then now my career's kind of taken off.

00:41:57.100 So I'm like, eh, I don't know.

00:41:58.360 I won't be like, if we don't have kids, I don't think either of us are going to be like,

00:42:03.020 oh man, we missed, we should have had.

00:42:04.640 No, I'll be good.

00:42:06.240 Now, would you freeze a batch of them eggs, you'd think?

00:42:09.200 No.

00:42:10.540 That freaking, that cold Easter, you know? 0.71

00:42:13.040 Start that thing up. 1.00

00:42:14.480 For me, I'm thinking if it happens, it was meant to be.

00:42:16.820 If it doesn't, it's not.

00:42:18.340 So I'm not going to go out of my way, you know?

00:42:21.560 I don't know.

00:42:22.680 Yeah.

00:42:23.300 You know what I mean?

00:42:24.040 Like, I don't know.

00:42:25.580 I've never had, so I've never had like a strong desire to have kids.

00:42:31.320 Okay.

00:42:31.640 And I've always said, I won't until that happens.

00:42:36.280 You know, I used to work with this old lady and she asked me if I had kids and I said,

00:42:40.320 no.

00:42:40.520 And she said, well, let me tell you this.

00:42:42.460 Don't have kids just because you feel like you should have, because it'll make it harder.

00:42:47.920 Have kids if you want kids. 0.90

00:42:49.560 And I was like, that's, that's so true.

00:42:51.680 And so I've, I've never felt the strong need.

00:42:55.200 To get that batch.

00:42:56.260 Yeah.

00:42:57.280 But hell, in five years I might, I don't know.

00:43:00.080 So I'm going to wait until that happens.

00:43:01.500 And if it never happens, all good.

00:43:03.240 I hate to interrupt the bonanza, but sometimes you got to get your brain reignited, recalibrated,

00:43:11.820 really.

00:43:12.940 And something that will help you is a company called BetterHelp.

00:43:17.000 You know, I've suffered from mental health issues, mental disorder, probably.

00:43:21.720 You know, I wake up in the morning and I don't want to do it.

00:43:25.380 And I don't even care what it is.

00:43:28.260 And when I need help, sometimes I don't, I don't, you know, there's not a place I can

00:43:32.780 go.

00:43:33.140 There's not a therapist I can drive to, or there's not, you know, somebody, there's not

00:43:37.780 somebody in my area.

00:43:39.140 You know, I might live in a rural area.

00:43:41.500 Well, that is all changing thanks to BetterHelp.

00:43:45.060 BetterHelp will assess your needs and match you with your own licensed professional therapist.

00:43:51.540 I mean, you can access them on your phone.

00:43:54.000 You can access them over FaceTime.

00:43:55.540 You can access them over text.

00:43:58.780 There's a broad range of expertise in BetterHelp's counselor network, which may not be locally

00:44:05.080 available in many areas.

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00:45:02.420 Now, back to the episode.

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00:47:11.580 Thank you.

00:47:13.460 Do you get up?

00:47:15.300 Do you have a daily routine, Connor?

00:47:17.020 Or you kind of go by the wayside?

00:47:18.700 Like just whatever, you know, Connor?

00:47:20.560 I do have a daily routine. 0.99

00:47:21.960 And I have to or I won't do shit. 0.98

00:47:24.520 I won't do shit if I don't have like my week planned out, my day-to-day. 0.99

00:47:31.220 So just I'm going to film this day. 0.78

00:47:33.400 I'm going to post this day.

00:47:34.180 I have, you know, phone calls this day.

00:47:36.120 I have everything.

00:47:37.100 And then my nieces live with us.

00:47:38.580 So now I'm homeschooling them.

00:47:40.000 No.

00:47:40.340 How old are they?

00:47:41.100 Three days a week.

00:47:41.460 Eight and ten.

00:47:42.280 Oh, my God.

00:47:42.960 Are they smart?

00:47:43.760 Yeah, they are.

00:47:44.680 They start this week.

00:47:46.860 So I'm doing that three days a week.

00:47:49.080 No.

00:47:49.660 And you're giving lessons and everything?

00:47:51.400 Yeah.

00:47:52.100 What kind of stuff are they learning about? 0.99

00:47:53.440 Well, it's a lot of like just math and shit. 0.99

00:47:57.320 I'm going to teach them. 0.99

00:47:58.100 I'm kind of going to go out of the box.

00:47:59.600 I'm going to teach them how to cook at a grocery shop.

00:48:02.280 Stuff like that.

00:48:03.180 You know what I mean? 1.00

00:48:03.580 Because so many damn adults don't know how to cook. 1.00

00:48:07.800 Like their mom, my sister who lives with us. 1.00

00:48:10.020 Holy shit. 0.99

00:48:10.820 Can't even make spaghetti, dude. 1.00

00:48:12.200 Really?

00:48:12.980 Yeah.

00:48:13.380 That's heartbreaking.

00:48:14.360 Yeah.

00:48:14.840 And I, you know, I cook.

00:48:15.840 And so I'm like, y'all are going to learn how to cook.

00:48:17.520 Yeah.

00:48:17.980 Even if they were boys, I would teach them how to cook.

00:48:20.060 Oh, it's such a skill, man.

00:48:21.960 Dude.

00:48:22.340 Yeah.

00:48:22.500 Even if we, all you make every night is macaroni and cheese, you're going to learn how to do

00:48:27.180 it.

00:48:27.520 You know, we're split up an apple or something.

00:48:29.340 Exactly.

00:48:30.060 You know?

00:48:30.420 Exactly.

00:48:31.120 I remember we used to do like when my mom would work.

00:48:34.680 And so we would make whatever, you know, we had at the house. 0.92

00:48:37.880 So we'd always come up with some real bad ideas and shit and make it like, we used to do macaroni 0.96

00:48:44.060 with marshmallows. 0.99

00:48:44.920 Because I think we went through a little phase of that shit and it was. 1.00

00:48:47.340 And you ate that? 1.00

00:48:48.360 Yeah.

00:48:48.740 Yeah.

00:48:48.880 We ate it.

00:48:49.560 Well, here's the thing.

00:48:50.140 Once you made it, you got to eat.

00:48:51.700 Yeah.

00:48:51.880 Oh, yeah.

00:48:52.180 Yeah.

00:48:52.320 You can't throw it away.

00:48:53.660 No, no, no, no.

00:48:53.740 So there wasn't a lot of wiggle room.

00:48:56.100 But the thing is, did you make it a second time and a third?

00:48:59.760 Well, here's what happened.

00:49:00.540 Somebody would make it.

00:49:01.460 One of the kids would make it.

00:49:02.340 We had four children.

00:49:03.040 One of them would make it. 1.00

00:49:03.760 Then the other three would try to up, outdo them, you know, with their bullshit idea. 0.99

00:49:09.500 And one of my sisters at the time was five. 1.00

00:49:11.320 So she would just fucking burn all kinds of shit. 1.00

00:49:13.760 And then we would fight, you know? 1.00

00:49:15.580 Yeah.

00:49:16.060 Oh, you got to throw in a fight there.

00:49:17.700 Oh, yeah.

00:49:18.320 You can't not fight.

00:49:19.160 But I really enjoyed that.

00:49:20.440 Yeah.

00:49:22.180 When you see, so you have a lot of interaction with like a lot of different celebrities and

00:49:26.580 stuff.

00:49:26.900 It seems like that have reached out to you.

00:49:29.760 Is all that been organic?

00:49:31.240 I know you had the fan attack video with Luke Bryan.

00:49:37.720 That was really, really crazy.

00:49:38.940 And his mother was just one of the best moments ever.

00:49:43.120 Dude.

00:49:43.920 So I have never, ever reached out to a celebrity.

00:49:47.680 That's all been them coming to me.

00:49:50.360 And Wynonna Judd follows me.

00:49:52.200 I just want to throw that out there.

00:49:53.940 Yep.

00:49:54.660 So anyway.

00:49:56.200 Yeah.

00:49:57.340 So a little backstory on this.

00:49:59.660 So they contact me.

00:50:01.980 Luke and his wife, they call me like, because I was supposed to go to this charity event.

00:50:04.900 They call me like a week before.

00:50:05.900 He's like, hey, I want to try to prank my mom.

00:50:07.660 Like, I'm thinking about if you attack me.

00:50:09.600 And I'm like, yeah, that's great.

00:50:11.020 That's hilarious.

00:50:11.520 Let's do it.

00:50:12.140 He reached out.

00:50:13.080 Yeah.

00:50:13.580 Out of the blue.

00:50:14.640 Yeah.

00:50:15.260 So he messaged you?

00:50:16.780 Is it somebody who works with him messaged you?

00:50:19.120 His wife follows me on Instagram.

00:50:22.120 Okay.

00:50:22.580 So we follow each other.

00:50:24.240 And they call.

00:50:25.020 Yeah.

00:50:25.140 They invited me to their charity event.

00:50:26.740 And then him and his wife FaceTimed me like a week before I was supposed to go out there.

00:50:30.700 He's like, I have this idea. 0.99

00:50:32.180 Damn. 0.99

00:50:32.480 It's romantic. 0.99

00:50:33.500 Yeah.

00:50:34.200 God.

00:50:34.560 So I get there and I'm thinking it's just going to be just a simple.

00:50:37.980 Yeah.

00:50:38.660 He goes, so security's out front.

00:50:41.640 And I've been telling my mom, my mom all morning that there's a crazy fan out there and that she's threatening to kill us.

00:50:49.360 And I go, hold on.

00:50:51.560 So this is like, is she going to make sure she doesn't have a gun?

00:50:55.260 Yeah.

00:50:55.840 Like, because I didn't know he was going to like tell her that I was threatening to kill.

00:50:59.080 So that.

00:50:59.760 So his mom was scared.

00:51:01.280 Right.

00:51:01.420 She's on alert.

00:51:02.320 Before.

00:51:02.940 Yeah.

00:51:03.240 Yeah.

00:51:03.480 Because this is her son.

00:51:04.620 This is the dang meal ticket.

00:51:05.780 Yeah.

00:51:06.400 You know what I'm saying? 1.00

00:51:07.060 Kill my other son. 1.00

00:51:07.900 Yeah. 1.00

00:51:08.300 Kill Randy, Brian. 1.00

00:51:09.940 You know what I'm saying? 0.99

00:51:11.840 Y'all could damn if I could set a bear trap on the third hole for Randy. 0.72

00:51:15.580 But we need Luke, you know? 0.93

00:51:18.240 But I feel you.

00:51:18.880 So she was set up to be scared of me.

00:51:22.280 Okay.

00:51:22.660 So I'm like, oh, my God.

00:51:23.800 Are you sure?

00:51:24.500 He's like, no, it's going to be great.

00:51:25.700 I was like, make sure.

00:51:26.460 Because, you know, she's from the South. 1.00

00:51:28.840 I don't know.

00:51:29.220 You know, make sure she's not packing.

00:51:30.620 He goes, we've made sure.

00:51:32.380 So apparently she does.

00:51:33.300 I don't know.

00:51:33.820 Yeah.

00:51:34.040 He goes, we've made sure.

00:51:34.860 I said, okay.

00:51:35.740 And that's something nice about an older person.

00:51:37.480 You can feel easy if they got a gun on them.

00:51:41.360 Yeah.

00:51:42.040 Because there's not as much body on them.

00:51:44.980 Yeah.

00:51:45.320 And she was super skinny, too.

00:51:46.600 So you can, you know.

00:51:47.180 Yeah, quickly.

00:51:47.960 You can give her a big hug and double over like that.

00:51:50.260 Next thing you know, you've done a full body search.

00:51:53.380 But we did the prank and I thought she was going to, I mean, I felt, I instantly thought

00:51:58.700 I shouldn't have done this.

00:51:59.660 Yeah.

00:52:00.040 I shouldn't have done this.

00:52:00.840 At what point?

00:52:01.380 Let's go through a little bit of it.

00:52:03.300 Okay.

00:52:03.960 And is it hot in here?

00:52:05.200 Isn't it a little bit?

00:52:05.940 I'm feeling a little better.

00:52:06.980 You are?

00:52:07.400 Okay, good.

00:52:07.940 I put it down to 70.

00:52:09.120 You did?

00:52:09.520 Yeah.

00:52:09.800 You just had a little sweat right here.

00:52:10.860 Oh, thank you.

00:52:11.800 Thank you.

00:52:12.120 Thank you.

00:52:13.060 Yeah.

00:52:13.340 Yeah.

00:52:13.900 You look very nice, by the way.

00:52:14.780 Thank you.

00:52:15.900 Okay, so you sneak in.

00:52:19.900 Rolling on top.

00:52:20.880 She throws her cigarette.

00:52:23.280 Hey, I got her.

00:52:24.120 I got her.

00:52:24.540 I got her.

00:52:25.060 I got her.

00:52:25.860 I got her.

00:52:26.560 I got her.

00:52:27.000 Hey, hey, hey, hey.

00:52:28.560 It wasn't until I got up.

00:52:30.020 I got her.

00:52:30.800 I got her.

00:52:31.600 I love the way he sneaks away.

00:52:33.540 Get on your stomach.

00:52:34.440 Get on your stomach.

00:52:35.860 Get up.

00:52:37.920 You're hurting.

00:52:38.520 Yeah.

00:52:39.380 And then.

00:52:39.840 I can't breathe.

00:52:41.080 You're hurting.

00:52:42.180 Give me five minutes.

00:52:43.080 Right there.

00:52:44.100 As soon as I stand up, I'm like, oh, my God.

00:52:45.900 Give me five minutes with your alcohol breath.

00:52:47.820 Really?

00:52:48.220 I really?

00:52:48.660 I will burn out.

00:52:49.880 Oh, and there's mom holding her back. 0.89

00:52:51.380 Yeah.

00:52:51.680 Really?

00:52:52.120 Really? 1.00

00:52:52.660 Come on, bitch. 1.00

00:52:54.080 Come on. 1.00

00:52:54.580 12 days of breakfast.

00:52:57.040 Right there.

00:52:58.120 I go, oh, no.

00:53:00.540 I thought she was going to pass out. 0.99

00:53:02.940 Oh, my God.

00:53:04.840 And look at that.

00:53:07.320 Wow.

00:53:07.840 It all comes to a head right there.

00:53:09.660 Mom saves the day.

00:53:11.020 Oh, yeah.

00:53:11.860 Shows that she's still got that mother wolf in her, you know?

00:53:14.960 Oh, yeah. 1.00

00:53:15.680 Afterwards, she was like, I was going to whoop your ass. 1.00

00:53:18.960 And she was going to, too. 1.00

00:53:20.200 She was dressed to whoop ass. 1.00

00:53:22.320 Would you see her throw the cigs? 0.99

00:53:23.580 She was ready. 1.00

00:53:25.820 She was throwing that shit like she was warming up. 1.00

00:53:27.440 Oh, my God. 1.00

00:53:28.700 Like, she was swallowing Ryan, dude. 1.00

00:53:30.420 Like, she was about to pitch some fucking haters right in your face, man. 1.00

00:53:33.620 That was fun. 1.00

00:53:34.640 That was fun.

00:53:35.420 That's awesome.

00:53:36.100 Yeah.

00:53:36.920 So, do you feel like that world kind of embraces you, though?

00:53:39.940 Like, kind of the country music world?

00:53:42.020 Do you feel?

00:53:42.700 Because I feel like you're just so, I feel like you're for everybody.

00:53:47.120 Do you feel like it's specific?

00:53:48.560 No, I feel like I'm for everybody.

00:53:49.800 I have a, from everywhere, from all, I mean, every ethnicity, I think people assume that

00:53:58.720 only, you know, white Southern people follow me.

00:54:02.900 And no, no, no, no, that's not true.

00:54:05.540 I feel like I'm for everybody because everybody loves redneck humor.

00:54:09.160 You don't have to be a redneck to enjoy that, you know? 0.99

00:54:12.240 It's fucking funny. 0.97

00:54:13.200 Well, a lot of it's just relatable stuff. 0.98

00:54:15.560 Like, even if you're looking at your YouTube, then it's going through the drive-through and

00:54:18.800 just, you know, you know, the people snacking on different stuff and experiencing it and

00:54:24.980 just to be in that moment.

00:54:28.300 Also, going through the drive-through with somebody, a lot of times, yeah, you get, you're

00:54:32.140 behind a couple cars. 0.99

00:54:33.980 Dude, this shit gets, it's some damn intimacy because you're just chilling there. 1.00

00:54:38.160 That's the biggest commitment I've ever made sometimes is being three cars deep in a drive-through 1.00

00:54:41.860 with somebody I don't know very well.

00:54:43.340 Sitting there waiting together.

00:54:44.980 God.

00:54:45.380 You know, those drive-through videos are my most popular and most requested videos,

00:54:51.180 which blows my mind.

00:54:53.040 Yeah.

00:54:53.380 Because I'm just sitting there eating, dude.

00:54:55.500 Yeah.

00:54:56.220 Have you watched it?

00:54:57.040 Have you seen the mukbangs on YouTube? 1.00

00:54:59.380 I've seen some of them.

00:55:00.360 I like the donut one that you and Jim did when y'all stacked those different types of meals.

00:55:05.520 So here's how that started.

00:55:07.280 Like a couple of years ago, mukbang, it's called mukbang or something. 0.99

00:55:10.880 I don't say that word because it's stupid. 1.00

00:55:13.120 It's a mukbang. 1.00

00:55:13.860 Right.

00:55:14.380 Okay.

00:55:15.560 They started getting like, people were getting millions and millions of views and making

00:55:19.040 money. 0.98

00:55:19.520 And I'm like, and I said, this is the dumbest thing I've ever seen. 0.99

00:55:25.480 You sit there and watch someone eat. 0.99

00:55:27.700 I thought it was ridiculous. 0.91

00:55:28.780 I go, let me do one. 0.80

00:55:30.600 As Tammy, to basically make fun of it. 0.53

00:55:33.280 And so I only planned on doing one.

00:55:35.260 So I did one.

00:55:36.200 It's my most viewed on YouTube.

00:55:38.360 People would not let me not do another one.

00:55:41.200 And it's, it's my most, if I go a week or two without doing one, my DMs are like, when's

00:55:45.200 the next month?

00:55:45.940 I'm like, you just, it's, it's so funny.

00:55:47.580 It's so easy.

00:55:48.140 It's easy content.

00:55:49.180 I just go through the drive through.

00:55:50.280 Yeah.

00:55:50.520 It's all improv.

00:55:51.220 I talk about whatever. 0.99

00:55:52.580 I make shit up and eat. 0.99

00:55:54.220 Yeah. 1.00

00:55:54.360 And that's it.

00:55:55.180 It's beautiful, man.

00:55:56.040 You gave me that poster.

00:55:57.080 I love that.

00:55:59.020 I also love, it's just like, I think it just feels, it obviously like it's produced your 0.99

00:56:07.560 shit, you know, it's like you guys are doing it, but it just feels, I don't know. 0.98

00:56:11.660 It just feels fun. 0.99

00:56:13.680 I'm trying to think of what really makes me get into it.

00:56:17.220 You know, I'm trying to think of what makes me. 0.96

00:56:18.940 Cause it's ridiculous.

00:56:19.720 It's almost, it's almost like watching a car wreck.

00:56:22.740 I think it's no, because for me, sorry, like for me it is because I just have been in that

00:56:29.560 situation so many times and never like just been in a moment like that. 0.96

00:56:34.120 And you're like, yeah, this is actually kind of close to what shit is like when you're just 0.96

00:56:37.740 kind of with somebody, you know, and you have to decide on food and you display your best 0.99

00:56:42.380 chance to display your manners on a damn date. 0.98

00:56:44.500 Sometimes is it the, you know, when the drive through lady says, what can I get you? 0.99

00:56:47.900 You know, and you get to see if the person's nice or not, if they say, yeah, thank you.

00:56:52.480 Yeah.

00:56:54.200 So I think some of that just seeing, it just feels real human.

00:56:57.400 Yeah.

00:56:58.040 Relatable.

00:56:58.620 Yeah.

00:56:58.840 It feels real relatable.

00:56:59.820 People love them.

00:57:00.840 So I keep doing them.

00:57:01.620 Do you think about doing like something that's more in the acting world?

00:57:07.140 I know you've had some stuff go on, but do you think about that kind of, or are you kind

00:57:10.380 of happy with the space that you're in?

00:57:11.780 I'm happy with the space I'm in, but, and if I don't go beyond that, I'll be so happy

00:57:19.700 and content, but yeah, I'm, I'm trying to write a Tanya movie right now. 0.89

00:57:25.180 So we'll see if that ever gets made or happy, you know, you know how shit goes, like, you

00:57:28.720 know, but I'm trying to write a Tanya movie, got some stuff kind of going on the work. 0.92

00:57:33.640 So hopefully that'd be great.

00:57:35.780 But if it doesn't, I'm good.

00:57:37.620 You know what I mean?

00:57:38.280 Yeah.

00:57:38.820 But I'm just taking it a day at a time and I'm, you know, opportunities.

00:57:42.100 I'm like, let's, let's try it.

00:57:43.180 Let's do it.

00:57:44.560 Yeah.

00:57:45.260 Yeah.

00:57:46.240 It's great.

00:57:47.260 Yeah.

00:57:47.560 I would, I'm trying to think if I have a opportunity at something I'm doing, I would, I would certainly

00:57:54.560 include you, you know?

00:57:56.020 Thank you.

00:57:56.820 Yeah.

00:57:57.200 I think it would just be fun.

00:57:58.900 That'd be great.

00:57:59.760 What kind of thing could we, what kind of even thing, what kind of characters could we

00:58:03.020 be, you think?

00:58:04.700 And I'm not playing Tammy.

00:58:06.540 You can do whatever you want.

00:58:07.980 If I make a Tanya movie.

00:58:08.860 As long as you just be alive.

00:58:10.280 If I, if I make a Tanya movie, you got to make a cameo in the Tanya movie.

00:58:14.340 Oh, I'm not doing a, oh, a cameo.

00:58:16.640 Yeah.

00:58:16.860 Yeah.

00:58:16.960 I'm just not paying somebody. 0.99

00:58:18.440 I'm not doing a damn birthday party for somebody for $9. 0.99

00:58:22.260 No, no, no, no. 0.99

00:58:24.040 You just got to be, you just got to be in the movie. 1.00

00:58:26.280 Oh, I'll stop in that bitch, man. 1.00

00:58:27.980 Yeah. 0.99

00:58:28.420 You know, but I want a real role. 0.97

00:58:30.380 I want to be a damn, you know, somebody that runs and works at a gift shop or somebody that, 0.94

00:58:35.320 you know, somebody that fixes something. 0.98

00:58:38.360 I want to be somebody that knocks on a door and shows up.

00:58:40.820 Yeah.

00:58:40.840 You want to play an important part and you should.

00:58:42.840 Yeah.

00:58:43.640 That's what I want.

00:58:44.080 I'll do it, dude.

00:58:44.920 Yes.

00:58:45.400 God, that's what I want.

00:58:46.520 Yes.

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01:00:51.740 These guys don't F around, gang.

01:00:56.600 What else is going on?

01:00:59.820 Not much, dude.

01:01:01.980 I freaking left some stuff out on the counter at home.

01:01:04.360 What'd you leave out? 0.99

01:01:05.240 I left some blueberries and I left a damn London broil. 0.99

01:01:08.640 The blueberries will be okay. 0.99

01:01:10.160 What's a London broil?

01:01:11.660 It's a mead.

01:01:12.320 It's like a kind of a high-end kind of mead, I guess, or medium end.

01:01:15.440 And it's raw?

01:01:16.960 Yeah.

01:01:17.360 Oh, that may be done for just because of the heat and the no air.

01:01:20.620 Yeah.

01:01:21.940 Oh, you're going to take a loss on that one.

01:01:23.820 Yeah, it just hurts a little.

01:01:25.100 Yeah.

01:01:25.820 At least you got the blueberries. 0.85

01:01:27.340 London broil, I've never heard of that.

01:01:29.940 It's good, man.

01:01:30.840 It's the best thing Britain ever did for us.

01:01:32.840 It looks like a skirt steak.

01:01:35.340 Some, you know?

01:01:37.080 Yeah, you know, it's a little more, I feel like it's a little more, like, there's not

01:01:42.560 a lot of taste to it.

01:01:43.820 It looks kind of great, but there's not a lot of taste to it.

01:01:46.440 Kind of like Britain.

01:01:47.040 Oh.

01:01:47.440 It's very British.

01:01:48.260 It's as British as you could get.

01:01:49.660 Wait, but it says grilled steak served cut diagonally, so it's just the cut.

01:01:55.320 Oh, really?

01:01:56.000 So, it's just a regular steak.

01:01:59.100 It's just how it's cut, right?

01:02:00.160 But they cut it out of a place that definitely- 1.00

01:02:02.780 That is English as fuck. 0.99

01:02:04.260 I feel like it. 1.00

01:02:05.100 Like, when I'm eating it, as compared to, like, a brisket or something, it doesn't stand 0.99

01:02:08.880 a chance to a damn brisket. 0.98

01:02:09.780 Okay, no, no, no, that makes sense. 1.00

01:02:10.760 That makes sense.

01:02:11.360 Because if you're eating a brisket, you're not thinking about Paris, France.

01:02:14.280 No.

01:02:15.020 You're thinking about Texas.

01:02:17.540 Okay, that makes sense now.

01:02:19.020 If I'm having a brisket, I'm thinking about wherever I am at that moment.

01:02:21.480 Mm-hmm.

01:02:22.940 What was that?

01:02:24.240 What's in the news, Nick?

01:02:25.280 We'll get into a couple of news topics.

01:02:26.760 What do we got?

01:02:29.220 Ex-Navy SEAL, credited with killing Osama bin Laden.

01:02:33.540 He was-

01:02:34.800 People got angry with him on Twitter because he was bragging about not wearing a mask.

01:02:38.860 He took a selfie with a Marine behind him, or a guy in a Marine cap who had a mask on, 0.99

01:02:44.200 and he goes, I'm not a pussy like this guy. 0.99

01:02:46.800 And people got angry with him on Twitter. 1.00

01:02:47.500 Damn, that was a risky move. 0.99

01:02:48.960 Risky, and then risky to tweet about it. 0.99

01:02:52.320 Yeah, that's brave to tweet about it.

01:02:53.740 I almost wondered if he was tweeting out of, like, trying to get back at the guy.

01:02:58.080 I think it's the rivalry between SEALs and Marines.

01:03:01.260 Oh, I could see a little bit of that.

01:03:02.700 Yeah, okay, okay.

01:03:04.200 Well, this goes really into-

01:03:05.600 Recently, I saw a dang man in a Marine's hat, and I thought it said Mariners on it, 1.00

01:03:11.820 Seattle Mariners.

01:03:12.580 And so I'm asking him about Ichiro and, you know, all of these different guys and Ken Griffey Jr. 0.99

01:03:19.640 and all this shit, and the guy is looking at him like, I am a damn- 0.99

01:03:23.160 And it said Marines and not Mariners? 1.00

01:03:25.380 He looks at me like I'm a damn still-in-school adult, you know? 0.99

01:03:28.820 Oh, my God. 0.98

01:03:29.420 And so it was the most awkward thing ever. 0.95

01:03:34.420 But, dude, I think if you kill bin Laden, dude, I don't think you have to wear a mask. 0.99

01:03:39.060 I don't think that dude needs to wear a damn shirt if he doesn't want to. 0.98

01:03:43.200 Yeah. 0.98

01:03:43.560 You know? 1.00

01:03:44.060 I don't care if he wears damn two dicks to a urinal. 1.00

01:03:46.760 This dude killed Osama bin Laden. 1.00

01:03:49.640 Oh, that's him?

01:03:50.520 That's him.

01:03:51.280 Oh, I see.

01:03:52.220 Okay, okay.

01:03:53.300 Wow.

01:03:53.400 And also, this guy seems semi-ginger. 0.99

01:03:55.960 You know how hard it is for a ginger to sneak through the damn, through, you know, where 1.00

01:04:00.700 it gets, I mean, it gets pretty, you know, it's more of a tan environment over there in 0.98

01:04:06.480 the desert.

01:04:07.000 Oh, yeah.

01:04:07.640 Everybody's got a tan.

01:04:08.880 Oh, yeah. 1.00

01:04:09.420 So you're just going to lollygag through with a damn, you know, with that damn torch skin? 1.00

01:04:14.860 They're going to frickin'. 1.00

01:04:16.640 Torch skin.

01:04:19.120 I mean, I just don't know if this guy needs, I mean, he should wear a shirt that said, hey,

01:04:22.780 I'm not wearing a mask because I killed Osama bin Laden.

01:04:26.440 Yeah.

01:04:27.180 Oh, that's great.

01:04:27.980 I think, but for me, I feel like he gets out of jail free.

01:04:30.360 Yeah.

01:04:31.800 Eh, I don't, I mean, I wear a mask just to, I guess, respect other people, but if-

01:04:37.040 Oh, totally.

01:04:37.860 If someone comes, if I'm in the grocery store and someone's not, I'm not, I don't say anything

01:04:41.900 or freak out.

01:04:42.760 No.

01:04:43.860 No, I'm not a mask.

01:04:44.900 Yeah, I'm not some kind of mask warrior.

01:04:46.720 No, no, no.

01:04:47.440 Yeah.

01:04:47.780 We're not the mask police.

01:04:49.180 Uh-uh.

01:04:49.860 No, I'm not the mask police.

01:04:50.860 I'm not even a mask. 0.96

01:04:51.700 I don't want to be, I'm not even a damn mask parole officer, you know? 0.97

01:04:55.940 Yeah. 0.93

01:04:56.920 Like, I have certain feelings about the whole pandemic and everything, but I wear a mask.

01:05:02.480 It's like somebody, it's like shaking somebody's hand when you meet them.

01:05:06.320 And if you feel comfortable after that, if people choose not to, then that's between them.

01:05:10.580 Yeah.

01:05:11.080 I feel like it's between consenting adults almost kind of.

01:05:13.600 Agree.

01:05:13.880 But I think if, for me, this guy killed Bin Laden, I think this dude doesn't have to 0.99

01:05:20.200 wear damn shoes into a freaking 7-Eleven if he doesn't want to. 0.99

01:05:23.380 You know what I'm saying? 1.00

01:05:23.740 I think he can go high on the hog as he wants.

01:05:25.800 Agree.

01:05:26.440 Nick, what do you think?

01:05:28.800 Yeah.

01:05:29.120 Yeah, I agree.

01:05:30.620 He should be able to do whatever he wants, not wear the mask.

01:05:33.480 I'm really worried about this though.

01:05:35.140 Uber and Lyft might shut down in California on Friday because they're trying to make all

01:05:41.240 the drivers be employees instead of independent contractors.

01:05:44.080 So they're just going to withdraw.

01:05:45.180 They're threatening to just withdraw from California and just shut down.

01:05:48.660 And there won't be Uber and Lyft in California all of a sudden on Friday.

01:05:52.080 I wonder why just in California?

01:05:54.840 Because it's California State that is trying to protect the employees or independent contractors

01:06:01.840 and make employees.

01:06:02.740 But if they shut down, then it's hurting everybody.

01:06:05.020 Wow.

01:06:05.540 And that's the only place I...

01:06:07.840 Nick Frequence right now.

01:06:08.880 Yeah, yeah, yeah.

01:06:09.480 He had a car and then he...

01:06:11.080 Well, it's your story, Nick.

01:06:12.020 I don't want to throw you under your own car.

01:06:14.240 A tree fell on it during a windstorm.

01:06:16.700 It was like the first nice car I ever bought.

01:06:19.800 And a tree fell on it and it totaled it.

01:06:22.100 And then the pandemic...

01:06:22.680 The only windstorm and the only tree in Los Angeles too.

01:06:26.560 I was going to ask, was that here in LA?

01:06:29.340 Like, what?

01:06:30.420 It was the night of the Super Bowl.

01:06:31.840 They actually said 2,000 trees were cleared from Los Angeles that night.

01:06:35.600 There was...

01:06:36.620 Oh, yeah.

01:06:37.120 I slept right through it.

01:06:38.500 Wow.

01:06:41.800 What's taking so long with insurance?

01:06:43.700 Nothing.

01:06:44.320 I got paid out for it.

01:06:46.340 Yeah, I got paid out for it.

01:06:47.320 I was like, uh...

01:06:47.720 And then the pandemic happened.

01:06:49.440 Okay, yeah, yeah, yeah.

01:06:50.040 But then, I don't know.

01:06:51.680 Ubering's actually...

01:06:53.260 I like it.

01:06:54.020 Yeah, and it's so convenient. 0.97

01:06:55.780 Like, that sucks. 0.94

01:06:57.860 I like it, but I just... 0.97

01:06:59.800 Sometimes I get damn judgmental when I'm in there and I just...

01:07:03.700 I will...

01:07:04.220 In my head, I'll have like a stack of dimes that I'm giving as a tip.

01:07:07.120 You know, hypothetical dimes.

01:07:09.180 And each time they do something a little that doesn't really meet my fancy, I guess.

01:07:15.200 Like what?

01:07:15.820 I will...

01:07:16.800 Okay, smacking their gum.

01:07:18.900 Okay.

01:07:20.160 Yeah.

01:07:21.160 A lady gave me a ride from here to home and smacked her gum so much that I had to go see 1.00

01:07:27.460 my therapist that week and that is 100% true.

01:07:29.980 And that's still...

01:07:31.120 I can still hear her smacking. 1.00

01:07:33.000 And it was just irrational how much she did it.

01:07:35.460 Yeah.

01:07:36.260 And another thing, talking to me about a lot of different stuff.

01:07:42.200 No, you're right.

01:07:43.180 You're right.

01:07:43.700 I don't want to talk at all.

01:07:44.880 Yeah.

01:07:45.460 I'd like...

01:07:46.140 And if they talk, but I'll make it...

01:07:48.220 Yeah, yeah, yeah.

01:07:48.580 No, you're right on that one.

01:07:49.620 And it's hard to curtail that conversation, you know?

01:07:52.300 Yeah.

01:07:52.960 Yeah.

01:07:53.240 Do you ever have people ask you that don't know who you are, oh, what do you do?

01:07:59.200 Yes.

01:07:59.940 Do you hate it?

01:08:00.880 Or do you like it? 0.71

01:08:01.660 Because I hate it.

01:08:02.840 I hate it now.

01:08:05.660 Yeah, okay.

01:08:06.040 I think there was a time when I liked it.

01:08:07.620 What do you tell them?

01:08:09.320 I say I work in entertainment, you know?

01:08:12.460 I do...

01:08:13.460 We do outreach.

01:08:15.360 I've said I'll do animal outreach.

01:08:16.780 I have some basic kind of lies I'll tell, you know?

01:08:19.900 I work for the city, you know?

01:08:22.340 Yeah.

01:08:22.560 Or I'll do unemployment.

01:08:24.760 I'll do, you know...

01:08:25.700 I'll say that a lot of times.

01:08:28.200 If it's somebody that I feel like is...

01:08:31.560 If it's somebody that's not going to talk much, that's how I'll gauge what answer I give.

01:08:35.380 Same.

01:08:36.120 If I can feel that they're going to...

01:08:38.240 Because when you say comedian or you say YouTuber or whatever you say, if I know that they're going to be like, oh, let me put...

01:08:46.760 You know what I mean?

01:08:47.660 I'll make something up.

01:08:49.340 Yeah.

01:08:49.620 But if it's someone that...

01:08:51.620 I usually say like social media marketing, which I don't even know what that is.

01:08:55.140 Yeah.

01:08:55.580 But I tell people that.

01:08:56.540 I like that.

01:08:57.140 And they're always like, oh, like what?

01:08:58.040 I'm like, just like Facebook and Instagram.

01:09:01.260 I just make something up.

01:09:02.760 Yeah.

01:09:02.920 But I hate it when people ask me what I do, and I don't know why.

01:09:07.140 I think it's because they do, like once you tell them, they like want to look you up.

01:09:11.600 You know what I mean?

01:09:12.080 They make a big, you know?

01:09:13.920 So I was just...

01:09:14.860 They're playing me a thing of mine once I'm while he's driving.

01:09:16.860 I'm like, this is insane, you know?

01:09:18.640 So that really, you know, that's unfortunate.

01:09:21.220 Do you have this instance where if you are with somebody and they don't...

01:09:27.200 It's kind of uncomfortable sometimes if people are giving you attention and they're not giving it to somebody else that you're with,

01:09:32.580 which they wouldn't probably because they don't know that person or they're not a fan of them,

01:09:36.580 I always feel so uncomfortable because I'm like, man, I don't want my friend to not feel good or not feel like I'm more important than them, you know?

01:09:45.340 Like when you get recognized?

01:09:46.660 Yeah, that makes me feel...

01:09:48.200 Yeah.

01:09:48.800 If I'm with, like, my, you know, family, like my sisters or, like, my close, close friends that are, like, used to it, I'm fine.

01:09:55.260 But if I'm with someone that's, like, you know, never...

01:09:58.120 Like, for instance, I was in Nashville before the pandemic and I was visiting some college friends.

01:10:04.380 We went out and I had people recognize me and it's awkward when they're just kind of standing there, like, you know.

01:10:10.860 You get what I'm saying?

01:10:12.240 Like, it can be very awkward.

01:10:14.140 You're right.

01:10:14.500 Like, when they're not giving anybody else attention and they're kind of making a big deal about you, but...

01:10:19.040 Yeah, it makes you feel some type of way a little bit.

01:10:21.260 You start to develop this sixth sense, though.

01:10:23.140 I know when I walk in a room, I can tell, like, who knows, who doesn't,

01:10:26.360 how this is all going to play out.

01:10:28.620 Like, you start to get...

01:10:29.900 And it's not an ego thing.

01:10:31.020 It's just...

01:10:31.520 It's like you've been through this little drill so many times.

01:10:34.680 You start to just...

01:10:35.620 You develop a sixth sense.

01:10:37.120 You develop...

01:10:37.740 You develop, okay, this person knows.

01:10:40.140 I can feel them.

01:10:40.940 They're telling this person.

01:10:42.240 This guy's not going to say anything, but he...

01:10:44.500 I feel like he knows. 1.00

01:10:47.240 I wish this bitch knew, you know. 1.00

01:10:49.560 Yeah. 1.00

01:10:49.820 Sometimes I get that, too.

01:10:51.620 Because I always get some real mukbangs that know you. 1.00

01:10:54.700 Yeah.

01:10:55.260 You know?

01:10:55.700 So a lot of real...

01:10:57.480 Same.

01:10:57.500 And a lot of closeted men are always hollering at me.

01:11:00.340 Really?

01:11:01.200 God, yes.

01:11:02.380 Hmm.

01:11:03.600 Oh.

01:11:05.140 It's crazy. 0.99

01:11:06.260 Like, guys want to go on a damn walk or something. 0.99

01:11:09.020 Go on a walk. 0.99

01:11:10.160 Just go on a walk.

01:11:11.460 Just...

01:11:11.840 You need to get some fresh air.

01:11:13.340 But unless one of us is a murderer, you know.

01:11:16.460 What else we got in the news, Nick?

01:11:18.660 Let's see.

01:11:19.040 What else?

01:11:22.380 Do you really keep up with the news?

01:11:24.100 Like, you know, news?

01:11:25.240 Not a ton.

01:11:25.920 I stay off these days.

01:11:27.120 It's too...

01:11:28.020 I don't trust it that much anymore.

01:11:30.080 Yeah.

01:11:30.460 It wants me to not have fun.

01:11:32.280 Yeah.

01:11:33.660 Exactly.

01:11:34.300 I'm kind of the same way. 0.99

01:11:37.260 One thing that gets me, though, I feel like we need a damn centralized mask. 0.96

01:11:41.020 Like, I mean, people are wearing, you know. 0.98

01:11:45.600 Somebody cut out part of a hat and taped it over their face, you know.

01:11:48.940 You got another guy. 0.99

01:11:50.000 Some guy shows up and you think he's a surgeon and he fucking works at Best Buy. 0.99

01:11:54.120 You know what I'm saying? 0.99

01:11:54.580 There's so many. 1.00

01:11:55.500 You have a guy in a damn Scream 3 mask. 0.99

01:11:58.900 Like, there's no protocol for unleash a mask that everyone needs. 1.00

01:12:05.120 Yeah.

01:12:05.900 Did you see that viral meme going around just a few days ago?

01:12:08.380 There's a guy with a long beard.

01:12:09.700 He had it tucked up and under his sunglasses and he was using his beard as a mask.

01:12:14.860 Now, that's pretty cool.

01:12:16.160 I would do that.

01:12:17.220 That was pretty cool.

01:12:19.120 Dude, yeah.

01:12:19.720 One guy had his hand amputated and he saved it and he got it put in front of his... 0.99

01:12:24.760 And it hung it on two damn little door hooks. 0.99

01:12:27.700 No! 0.99

01:12:29.120 It's just beautiful to see a lot of stuff that's going on.

01:12:32.640 I saw it on Instagram.

01:12:36.360 But it's like, put a centralized mask out. 0.99

01:12:38.900 You got people just goddamn half a panty in front of their head. 1.00

01:12:41.620 You know what I'm saying? 1.00

01:12:42.540 Oh, my God.

01:12:43.120 And are they serious?

01:12:44.660 I don't know.

01:12:45.920 They can't be.

01:12:47.160 You can't be.

01:12:48.800 Oh, my gosh.

01:12:49.500 But it qualifies.

01:12:50.620 That's the thing.

01:12:51.080 It's funny.

01:12:51.520 It's like, oh, as long as you walk in, you know.

01:12:53.660 As long as you have something.

01:12:55.760 Yeah.

01:12:56.400 Right there.

01:12:57.180 Yeah. 0.99

01:12:57.480 And it could be fucking anything. 0.99

01:13:00.300 You're good. 0.99

01:13:01.180 Come on in.

01:13:02.280 Yeah.

01:13:02.800 That's what's so crazy to me, dog.

01:13:05.340 I'm not a doctor. 1.00

01:13:06.820 Fuck, I'm not even an exterminator. 0.99

01:13:08.980 But I'll tell you this. 1.00

01:13:11.620 Dude.

01:13:12.380 Just anything in front of your mouth, that's not a real...

01:13:16.400 That's not a plan.

01:13:17.500 It doesn't even have to be cloth.

01:13:19.140 Yeah, it doesn't. 0.99

01:13:20.940 As long as it's connected behind your ears, fucking anything, dude. 1.00

01:13:25.280 Oh, dude. 1.00

01:13:25.900 That one guy had a strong enough overbite.

01:13:28.380 And they're like, that qualifies.

01:13:31.300 Oh, my God.

01:13:33.160 Qualifies.

01:13:33.440 It could be anything.

01:13:34.760 You'll have a fellow just comb his bangs straight down across his face.

01:13:39.780 Oh, bang face. 0.81

01:13:40.740 Yeah, he's healthy.

01:13:41.620 Get him in here. 0.99

01:13:42.360 And then you got some 60-year-old man in a damn Raggedy Andy mask over there. 0.99

01:13:47.120 Oh, my gosh. 1.00

01:13:47.580 Fucking drinking Purell out there. 1.00

01:13:49.360 It's just... 1.00

01:13:49.880 It's like...

01:13:50.680 How is...

01:13:51.520 There's no protocol.

01:13:53.660 No.

01:13:54.360 No.

01:13:55.060 I've never thought about that until you brought it up.

01:13:57.400 That you're right.

01:13:58.360 Like, gosh.

01:14:00.420 That's great.

01:14:00.460 Nick, bring up the Anti-Maskers League if you can. 1.00

01:14:05.640 I didn't know about this.

01:14:06.620 Well, this is something.

01:14:07.560 Take us here, Nick.

01:14:08.340 What is this?

01:14:10.440 Do you want the Anti-Mask League?

01:14:11.940 We'll go right here.

01:14:13.600 Marijuana vending machines are now available in Colorado with more to follow.

01:14:20.140 Yeah.

01:14:21.340 And do you guys do marijuana in that?

01:14:24.200 Drugs?

01:14:24.860 I feel like I...

01:14:26.300 I was like 28 the first time I ever smoked weed.

01:14:28.640 Oh, yeah.

01:14:29.080 I used to on occasion, and it started giving me panic attacks.

01:14:32.780 Where were you at when you smoked at first?

01:14:34.280 Were you with your man or what?

01:14:36.500 Oh, my gosh.

01:14:38.040 I think, yeah.

01:14:38.820 We were living in San Diego.

01:14:40.740 I moved to San Diego when I was 26.

01:14:42.220 So, yeah, yeah.

01:14:43.740 At the house...

01:14:44.740 And who introduced you to it?

01:14:45.960 Was it you?

01:14:46.540 Was it him?

01:14:47.160 Was it...

01:14:47.540 I've always been around people that smoke.

01:14:49.280 Okay.

01:14:49.540 So, I think we had a roommate.

01:14:51.060 I can't even...

01:14:51.660 I don't even know, man.

01:14:53.700 But smoked it.

01:14:54.960 Loved it. 1.00

01:14:56.120 Laughed my ass. 0.99

01:14:57.680 So, it was one of those great laughing, you know? 0.99

01:15:00.300 So, I do it like once or twice a month.

01:15:02.500 Great.

01:15:02.720 Had a great time for maybe two or three years.

01:15:04.460 And then, boom, panic attacks.

01:15:07.180 No matter what I...

01:15:07.720 So, I smoke CBD now because I still like the smell.

01:15:10.540 So, I'm just a CBD-er.

01:15:11.960 Okay.

01:15:12.460 Yeah.

01:15:12.700 And does it feel like it calms you a little?

01:15:13.920 Yeah.

01:15:14.420 Oh, yeah.

01:15:15.120 It works.

01:15:16.160 And I don't feel like somebody's going to murder me.

01:15:19.000 Yeah.

01:15:19.660 Yeah.

01:15:19.780 Honest to God, I remember the worst, the worst time I ever got paranoid during it.

01:15:26.560 Smoked weed.

01:15:27.300 Mm-hmm.

01:15:28.120 I went to bed. 0.99

01:15:29.240 And I was positive that Greg was going to kill me. 1.00

01:15:32.060 Oh, I hate that shit. 1.00

01:15:33.220 No. 1.00

01:15:33.240 Like, I thought, he's going to murder me tonight.

01:15:36.220 It was so real.

01:15:37.500 And he came in the bedroom.

01:15:39.040 Oh, which is the first sign of somebody who's going to murder you.

01:15:41.260 They come into the room.

01:15:42.140 In a dark room.

01:15:42.800 He comes in.

01:15:44.840 I'm like, oh, my God.

01:15:45.720 How's he going to do it?

01:15:46.760 Does he have a gun?

01:15:48.040 Is he going to strangle me?

01:15:49.020 Yeah.

01:15:49.280 What's he going to do?

01:15:50.340 And he walks over to my side of the bed.

01:15:51.920 I'm like, oh, and I'm literally...

01:15:52.900 My heart...

01:15:53.260 I'm literally like, oh, God.

01:15:54.520 Oh, God.

01:15:54.940 I'm going to die.

01:15:55.920 I mean, and this was real, dude. 0.56

01:15:57.380 Yeah, in your head.

01:15:58.040 Yeah.

01:15:58.320 It's real.

01:15:59.240 And he leans over and goes, good night, baby, and gives me a kiss. 0.99

01:16:01.500 And I go, he's fucking faking it. 0.99

01:16:03.480 Yeah. 0.99

01:16:03.600 He's going to wait until I fall asleep.

01:16:04.820 Mm-hmm.

01:16:05.200 And he's going to do it.

01:16:06.360 And I did not sleep that night.

01:16:07.520 Cool.

01:16:08.800 Into the morning.

01:16:09.720 And I woke up.

01:16:10.480 I was like, I need to not smoke weed anymore.

01:16:13.880 Yeah.

01:16:14.600 And I...

01:16:15.280 Yeah, I don't smoke anymore.

01:16:17.100 Isn't that crazy?

01:16:18.040 Yeah, but also some of his behaviors.

01:16:20.740 Mm-hmm.

01:16:20.760 Yeah.

01:16:22.260 You know?

01:16:23.620 Yeah. 1.00

01:16:24.180 Some of that shit is a dead giveaway. 1.00

01:16:25.680 Dude, when you're high, you're like, oh, this motherfucker's going to kill me. 1.00

01:16:27.740 And the next thing you know, they go and take a sip of water. 1.00

01:16:30.540 And you're like, oh, yeah.

01:16:31.620 Yep. 1.00

01:16:32.020 Just hydrating up this damn murderer. 1.00

01:16:34.280 You know? 1.00

01:16:35.040 I feel you, bro.

01:16:35.880 Weed will do that.

01:16:36.700 Yeah.

01:16:37.520 Um, what about, do you ever, I feel like, I remember one time getting so high and going 0.99

01:16:43.720 to a damn funeral. 0.99

01:16:45.540 Oh. 1.00

01:16:46.980 And I thought, I just, oh.

01:16:50.360 And I was laughing. 0.99

01:16:51.380 It gave me the damn giggles, dude. 0.99

01:16:53.000 Oh, no. 0.99

01:16:54.180 And it was just like, can you believe everybody's tripping out, dude? 1.00

01:16:57.740 Holy shit. 0.99

01:16:58.440 Just because Mr. Polito is dead, dude. 0.99

01:17:00.260 Nobody even liked this guy.

01:17:01.400 People are just there.

01:17:02.640 Oh, my God.

01:17:02.780 I'm like, half these people are pretending. 0.99

01:17:04.400 I'm fucking laughing. 0.89

01:17:05.280 And then I'm starting to think, yeah, I started getting paranoid and thinking that people, 0.99

01:17:09.060 somebody was a murderer. 0.99

01:17:09.880 Because it looks like a damn crime scene when you're at a funeral. 1.00

01:17:12.600 Yeah. 1.00

01:17:13.200 A movie scene.

01:17:14.160 Yes.

01:17:14.420 Yeah.

01:17:14.980 It's like a whodunit.

01:17:16.060 Yeah.

01:17:16.420 I can see that.

01:17:17.140 When you're high at a funeral, it is a straight up whodunit.

01:17:19.980 Did you think it would be a good experience?

01:17:22.700 There was just weed going through the area.

01:17:24.440 Okay.

01:17:24.860 And you happen to have a funeral on the docket.

01:17:27.720 Okay.

01:17:28.600 But it was, I would never do it again, man.

01:17:31.860 That's the crazy thing about weed, dude.

01:17:34.240 It's just. 0.99

01:17:35.200 It can be either fucking amazing and the best or can bring so much fucking fear. 0.99

01:17:43.200 Like, oh, my gosh. 0.99

01:17:43.940 It's one or the other.

01:17:44.840 And I don't get it.

01:17:45.740 Yeah.

01:17:46.140 It's like back page for your DNA.

01:17:47.660 It's like meeting somebody off the internet.

01:17:49.660 That's what weed is, man.

01:17:50.860 Yeah, you never know what you're going to get.

01:17:53.400 Yeah, you might get murdered.

01:17:54.840 You might get not murdered.

01:17:56.060 Yeah.

01:17:56.660 You know?

01:17:57.220 It's one or the other.

01:17:58.120 Yeah.

01:18:00.240 This was something that happened.

01:18:01.540 This is in.

01:18:02.380 Take us through a little bit of this, Nick.

01:18:04.000 The Anti-Mask League of San Francisco was an organization formed to protest the requirement

01:18:09.240 for people in San Francisco to wear masks during the 1918 pandemic.

01:18:14.860 Yeah.

01:18:15.040 So they had a.

01:18:15.740 Yeah, they had a group of people.

01:18:17.040 And actually, there's a New York Times article.

01:18:18.500 If you if you try and look that up real quick.

01:18:21.780 So basically, they had something very much like what we have now where people didn't

01:18:25.800 want.

01:18:26.000 A lot of people didn't want to wear masks.

01:18:27.700 A lot of people did want to wear masks.

01:18:29.680 There was people getting ill and there's people in the street.

01:18:33.720 The police would even give you fines.

01:18:35.680 Like if you didn't have a mask on, you could get a fine for like $5 up to $25.

01:18:41.800 That was a lot back then.

01:18:43.060 Oh, yeah. 0.99

01:18:43.720 It was a it was a just damn. 1.00

01:18:45.660 Damn. 1.00

01:18:46.280 Half of a buttload, dude. 1.00

01:18:48.020 If you're doing a damn gender reveal and it's your friend page. 1.00

01:18:51.540 It was half a damn BL. 1.00

01:18:53.080 Hell, the first infection go down a little bit. 0.99

01:18:56.140 There they are.

01:18:57.420 Was identified in March at Army Base in Kansas.

01:19:02.220 By the fall of 1918, seven cities have put in effect mandatory face mask laws.

01:19:08.000 And the masked city, San Francisco, became known as the masked city because of this pandemic. 0.99

01:19:17.300 Damn. 0.99

01:19:18.680 And people didn't know how to wear them. 0.99

01:19:22.000 Oh, and somebody.

01:19:25.080 Yeah, somebody shot somebody eventually because they weren't wearing a mask.

01:19:28.580 Yeah.

01:19:29.280 On October 28, a blacksmith named James Wisser stood on Powell and Market Streets using a crowd to urging a crowd to dispose of their masks.

01:19:39.620 And somebody hit him with a sack of silver. 0.99

01:19:41.960 Damn, that'll get you. 1.00

01:19:44.420 Yeah. 1.00

01:19:45.100 Shitty way to go. 1.00

01:19:45.680 You always want to make money and then bam, son, that shit gets you right in the chin. 1.00

01:19:49.640 Oh, no. 1.00

01:19:51.220 But anyway, yeah, I mean, somebody died.

01:19:53.280 Nobody's killed anybody yet for not wearing a mask or wearing one, I don't think.

01:19:57.000 I don't think so.

01:19:58.760 So we're still in a pretty good space there.

01:20:00.380 Yeah.

01:20:00.960 You know, compared to how it had been.

01:20:02.300 I mean, people really were losing it.

01:20:04.060 Wow.

01:20:06.100 Do we have any other questions that came in, Nick?

01:20:08.580 That was pretty much it for the questions.

01:20:11.420 Okay.

01:20:12.260 All right. 1.00

01:20:15.420 Well, damn. 1.00

01:20:16.340 Cool. 1.00

01:20:17.480 Dang.

01:20:17.840 What are y'all going to do?

01:20:19.940 What do you feel about this coming up like the holidays and Halloween?

01:20:22.700 Have you started thinking about that at all?

01:20:24.020 Well, every year we have a big Halloween party.

01:20:26.940 You do?

01:20:27.620 Oh, yeah.

01:20:29.020 And there's nobody there that I know.

01:20:33.000 It's all like, because I don't really know anybody in San Diego.

01:20:36.440 I really don't.

01:20:37.180 Like all my friends are up here in LA and stuff.

01:20:39.500 So it's like my friend.

01:20:40.780 It's like my sister's like employee, like work, what do you call them?

01:20:46.260 Co-workers?

01:20:47.060 Co-workers, yeah.

01:20:48.080 And does she work at a bank or something?

01:20:49.640 No.

01:20:50.720 No.

01:20:51.140 She works.

01:20:51.440 They work at a plumbing, like a plumbing office.

01:20:53.720 Oh, yeah.

01:20:53.880 Whatever.

01:20:54.260 So it's just a bunch of plumbers.

01:20:56.300 But anyway, there's always like a ton of people.

01:20:58.160 It's one of those things where people invite people to where I don't know who's there.

01:21:02.400 But anyway, it's always a big, fun time.

01:21:04.920 We look forward to it every year.

01:21:06.060 We'd start decorating like a month before, and we're probably not going to have it this

01:21:09.260 year.

01:21:09.880 Yeah.

01:21:10.640 But we'll still have fun.

01:21:12.060 You know what I mean?

01:21:13.480 But it seems like such a time when masks, you need masks.

01:21:16.400 It's almost, you know, everybody has a mask on.

01:21:20.840 It's the one party you can have.

01:21:22.500 That's true.

01:21:22.860 I didn't think about that.

01:21:24.240 You're right.

01:21:25.160 Kind of.

01:21:25.700 I mean, I'm not calling you out for not having it.

01:21:27.660 Yeah. 0.98

01:21:27.940 I just want you to damn have it. 0.99

01:21:29.560 Yeah, I know. 0.99

01:21:30.500 You know, even though I stay home all the time, I fucking love knowing. 0.87

01:21:33.800 Yeah, that somebody's having a Halloween party. 0.93

01:21:35.700 That people are having a good time.

01:21:37.120 Yeah.

01:21:37.820 That's true.

01:21:38.440 It makes you feel good.

01:21:39.120 That's true.

01:21:39.660 I think we were going to try to still have something, but not just invite like us and

01:21:43.960 the immediate friends, not all the people.

01:21:46.780 But we'll still have something. 0.97

01:21:48.320 But yeah, that kind of sucks. 0.96

01:21:50.380 And you also get the judgment from social media. 0.97

01:21:53.820 You know, if I were to have that big Halloween party, oh gosh.

01:21:57.580 Yeah. 1.00

01:21:58.040 You know, you got the people on your ass. 1.00

01:21:59.500 But I think we're just going to have something small. 0.99

01:22:02.800 And then we're going home for Thanksgiving, which is the first time in like eight years

01:22:06.600 we've gone home for Thanksgiving.

01:22:07.960 Back to Thackerville or no?

01:22:09.560 Yeah.

01:22:09.900 Well, Durant, which is close.

01:22:10.960 So it's Thackerville.

01:22:11.760 Wow.

01:22:12.080 But yeah.

01:22:13.080 So we're doing that.

01:22:15.020 My sister's 30th is after Thanksgiving.

01:22:17.520 So we're renting a cabin in Oklahoma.

01:22:19.540 Oh, fun.

01:22:20.360 I love Oklahoma.

01:22:21.460 Yeah.

01:22:21.680 Well, certain parts.

01:22:23.400 We went to Tulsa and we went to the ball room or something.

01:22:27.220 You've been there in Tulsa?

01:22:28.480 Mm-hmm.

01:22:28.880 Man, it was so...

01:22:29.900 I like it up there.

01:22:30.820 It was a great show.

01:22:31.860 Yeah.

01:22:32.520 I like it up there.

01:22:33.300 When you do your live show, what is it?

01:22:35.420 Like, what do you do actually?

01:22:36.920 Um, so what I did before the pandemic was I would come out as me and do like, like 10

01:22:44.080 minutes or so.

01:22:44.840 Mm-hmm.

01:22:45.400 And, um, I would thank everybody for coming and they think that was it.

01:22:49.280 And it got so awkward.

01:22:51.360 Like, people were pissed.

01:22:52.460 They'd be like...

01:22:52.940 I'd be walking to the crowd and they're like, like, I paid, you know, like pissed.

01:22:57.060 And then I would come back out as Tammy.

01:22:58.780 Yeah.

01:22:59.440 And that's when it really, really took off.

01:23:02.060 Oh, yeah.

01:23:02.540 I'm thinking though, for the future shows, like, I'm just going to do Tammy.

01:23:05.860 And I almost only did the Chelsea stuff just to see if I could do it as me.

01:23:10.400 And I can, but it's more comfortable doing it as Tammy.

01:23:13.100 Is it?

01:23:13.840 Oh, yeah.

01:23:15.080 Oh, yeah.

01:23:15.500 It's more comfortable.

01:23:16.580 I feel like the material's funnier.

01:23:18.820 Mm-hmm.

01:23:19.240 Although everything I, I say is true and happened to me, but I tell it as Tammy.

01:23:26.840 Oh, yeah.

01:23:27.600 Yeah.

01:23:28.240 And what about that little, little gem at Little Sugar Calamari?

01:23:31.220 Why don't you bring him out?

01:23:32.480 Oh, God.

01:23:33.420 He lives...

01:23:33.720 God, I would love to see him at something.

01:23:35.260 Well, he's busy.

01:23:36.760 He works at, he's assistant manager of the Dollar General.

01:23:39.060 No, he isn't.

01:23:39.700 Mm-hmm.

01:23:39.940 In what city?

01:23:40.920 Oh, gosh.

01:23:41.620 Where's he?

01:23:41.900 I know he lives in Georgia.

01:23:43.320 Some little town outside of Macon.

01:23:45.020 God.

01:23:45.480 I can't remember it, but yeah.

01:23:46.800 I love Dollar General.

01:23:48.300 Oh, yeah.

01:23:48.880 He's running the place.

01:23:50.820 Well, a lot of people don't realize Dollar General, if you live in a small area, rural

01:23:54.360 area, Dollar General is it.

01:23:56.620 It will be like...

01:23:57.640 The Walmart of the...

01:23:58.340 Yeah, for three towns or four towns, you go to wherever the...

01:24:02.040 The Dollar General will be the place that everybody goes kind of for everything.

01:24:05.680 Oh, yeah.

01:24:06.340 Oh, for sure.

01:24:06.500 People don't realize that.

01:24:07.620 Mm-mm. 0.99

01:24:08.240 God, that fucking pisses me off, dude. 0.99

01:24:10.660 It really does. 0.99

01:24:11.460 And Dollar General is like popping in small towns.

01:24:15.540 Yeah.

01:24:15.680 They know what they're doing.

01:24:16.720 Yeah.

01:24:17.160 They're making money.

01:24:18.220 And they're good, yeah.

01:24:19.100 Look at Dollar General stock.

01:24:20.280 Pull it up, Nick.

01:24:20.880 Oh.

01:24:21.300 And I know it probably hadn't done well during this pandemic, but prior to that...

01:24:25.000 I feel like this is a hot time for them.

01:24:27.900 Yeah.

01:24:28.040 Well, no, I guess if they're shut down.

01:24:29.500 Well, if they're still open, let me see them over the past two years.

01:24:31.940 Let me look at...

01:24:32.580 Yeah.

01:24:32.940 Give me a two-year, five-year, Nick.

01:24:34.640 They're open.

01:24:35.400 There's one year.

01:24:37.300 See?

01:24:38.020 I mean, that's a moneymaker.

01:24:39.760 Yeah.

01:24:40.360 They're making money.

01:24:41.480 Dear God, dude.

01:24:42.200 Look at that.

01:24:43.140 Nothing but rising. 1.00

01:24:44.400 Where else can you judge your fucking neighbors and get a damn broom? 1.00

01:24:49.500 Yeah. 1.00

01:24:49.860 And some Dollar General Hot Pockets.

01:24:54.640 Yeah.

01:24:55.040 Not the Hot Pocket brand.

01:24:56.240 No.

01:24:56.560 Dollar General brand.

01:24:57.240 Yeah, dude.

01:24:57.840 And it feels like military-esque since it has General in it.

01:25:00.760 You know, I think a lot of men don't mind going.

01:25:02.880 Yeah.

01:25:04.260 It's got that kind of vibe, you know?

01:25:06.420 Yeah.

01:25:07.040 I just had a vision that one day Dolly Parton comes on and you come on and guest host that

01:25:12.020 episode.

01:25:13.900 Because I'm going to be getting a studio in Nashville starting on September 1st.

01:25:16.620 Really?

01:25:17.380 Yeah.

01:25:17.580 Oh, if you do that, can you let me know?

01:25:21.260 I'm letting you know.

01:25:22.520 Oh, if she's going to do it, yes.

01:25:23.800 Yeah.

01:25:24.460 That's going to be a goal I'm going to set.

01:25:26.240 Or if you're doing it and I can come and walk.

01:25:29.860 That doesn't matter.

01:25:30.780 It doesn't matter.

01:25:31.760 And I see her doing this.

01:25:33.540 I really do.

01:25:34.140 Let's put it out to the universe now.

01:25:36.120 Make this happen.

01:25:37.200 Are you moving in Nashville?

01:25:38.480 I'm getting a place there.

01:25:40.340 Okay.

01:25:40.760 So, I'm going to be there a lot.

01:25:43.460 But I'm also, we're not, we're keeping this and we're keeping, you know, everything, keeping

01:25:48.900 my place here and stuff.

01:25:50.560 So, I'm just kind of testing it out.

01:25:52.740 Yeah.

01:25:52.940 But yeah, maybe that'd be fun.

01:25:54.200 Maybe you'll come.

01:25:55.140 Maybe we do some, a couple of episodes.

01:25:56.740 Morgan Wallen's going to come on one.

01:25:58.040 Oh, yeah.

01:25:58.240 Which I'm so excited about.

01:25:59.900 That's awesome, man.

01:26:00.380 Even though I didn't ask him yet.

01:26:01.800 So, there you go.

01:26:02.940 He'll do it.

01:26:03.860 He'll do it.

01:26:04.380 But I think he will do it.

01:26:05.660 Yeah.

01:26:07.000 That is awesome.

01:26:08.320 Yeah.

01:26:08.500 I'm just kind of excited just to be able to like, I think just have different types of

01:26:12.080 people.

01:26:12.460 Yeah.

01:26:12.620 But I would, but it's so funny because I was listening to Dolly Parton sings that I

01:26:17.520 will always love you.

01:26:18.520 A lot of people don't know she did that.

01:26:20.160 Oh, yeah.

01:26:21.180 People think it's Whitney Houston.

01:26:22.300 She did.

01:26:22.620 It was great, but.

01:26:23.360 No.

01:26:23.920 She, you know what? 0.95

01:26:24.640 She wrote that.

01:26:25.220 She wrote that after she, she quit that show that she was on.

01:26:28.300 No way.

01:26:28.880 Really?

01:26:29.720 Oh, it's a whole for Porter Wagner.

01:26:31.580 She wrote it for Porter Wagner, who is her boss.

01:26:33.700 She was on that show with him and she quit and he got pissed because she, she made the 1.00

01:26:40.400 show.

01:26:41.040 You ain't Porter.

01:26:42.180 She's, what's that song?

01:26:43.220 Somebody.

01:26:44.420 I don't know.

01:26:44.680 You ain't.

01:26:46.220 Woman enough to take my man. 1.00

01:26:47.660 No, it's like, you ain't so-and-so and you ain't Porter.

01:26:50.400 I think it was her and somebody.

01:26:51.260 Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

01:26:52.020 I know what you're talking about.

01:26:53.080 Yeah, yeah, yeah.

01:26:53.620 That's a newer song.

01:26:54.820 Oh, it is?

01:26:55.280 I think so.

01:26:56.080 You ain't Johnny or something like that.

01:26:57.200 Yeah, yeah, yeah.

01:26:57.660 You ain't Porter.

01:26:58.260 Yeah, that's a newer song.

01:26:59.140 I don't know who sings that.

01:27:01.740 Oh, yeah, there it is.

01:27:02.320 Oh, you ain't Dolly and you ain't Porter.

01:27:03.960 Yeah.

01:27:04.040 Ashley Monroe.

01:27:05.360 Yeah.

01:27:05.640 Yeah.

01:27:05.780 I was listening to her the other day, man.

01:27:07.260 I like her.

01:27:08.080 Me too.

01:27:08.760 Her voice.

01:27:09.500 Her voice is different than anything else I've ever heard.

01:27:12.600 She's got like a, yeah, almost like a Dolly voice. 0.59

01:27:15.040 I could see that.

01:27:16.120 Like Dolly's voice is like, you know Dolly's singing.

01:27:18.640 Oh, God. 0.98

01:27:19.140 It's like Father Time just damn busting in your ear. 0.99

01:27:22.280 You know she's singing. 0.95

01:27:23.980 It feels good.

01:27:25.000 I just love her.

01:27:26.380 But I will always love you.

01:27:27.840 Put this on a little bit, Nick.

01:27:28.960 We'll listen to a few seconds and then we'll get out of here.

01:27:31.140 Is there a more beautiful woman? 0.97

01:27:36.500 She did it.

01:27:37.520 It's still beautiful.

01:27:38.360 Yeah.

01:27:39.220 My God.

01:27:46.700 Bring it up a little for me, Nick.

01:27:53.060 Your husband's not going to get jealous we're listening to this, is he?

01:27:55.600 No, you could give me a reach around and he wouldn't get jealous. 0.99

01:27:58.460 Okay, damn. 0.99

01:27:58.920 Yeah. 1.00

01:28:01.140 Damn. 1.00

01:28:02.000 Yeah. 1.00

01:28:05.120 Look at her.

01:28:06.840 I love her.

01:28:08.520 Oh.

01:28:09.580 Here we go.

01:28:14.580 This is a bucket list I never knew I had.

01:28:17.500 This, this.

01:28:21.000 Yeah.

01:28:21.440 You're putting in a video moment of this song.

01:28:23.160 Yes.

01:28:24.500 Let her know.

01:28:25.400 Let her know.

01:28:25.500 Let her know.

01:28:26.280 Let her know.

01:28:31.140 We're doing it.

01:28:32.900 There you go.

01:28:34.700 What a moment.

01:28:36.360 What a day.

01:28:37.740 Wow.

01:28:38.340 That's all I am to be here.

01:28:41.580 Yeah.

01:28:42.240 You know what?

01:28:42.920 I'm pretty confident.

01:28:44.940 Wish I looked like 1970 Dolly.

01:28:47.640 Oh, I think you got a lot of Dolly in you.

01:28:49.660 Thank you.

01:28:50.520 Yeah.

01:28:50.760 I think you just remind everybody, you know, that, you know, that just, you just, I don't

01:28:57.480 know.

01:28:57.680 You're just so confident.

01:28:59.080 I wish I was as confident as you sometimes.

01:29:01.020 Thank you.

01:29:01.820 You should be.

01:29:03.140 I know.

01:29:03.620 I don't know what happened.

01:29:04.980 No, you, you, you are.

01:29:06.740 It's in there.

01:29:07.320 You should be.

01:29:07.880 You got that mullet. 1.00

01:29:08.920 You got majestic as fuck. 1.00

01:29:11.560 You good. 1.00

01:29:11.800 Oh, I got a penis shaped like a damn candy corn though. 1.00

01:29:14.320 Oh, wow. 1.00

01:29:15.320 Yeah.

01:29:15.640 Hey, that's different.

01:29:16.880 You know, you're, you're different.

01:29:18.420 You're right.

01:29:18.860 You're right.

01:29:19.280 You're right.

01:29:19.620 It's amazing.

01:29:20.860 Yeah.

01:29:21.220 It just feels weird or something like that.

01:29:23.580 You know, nobody wants to, you know, you don't want, you know, somebody orders a jug of

01:29:27.300 milk and you break out milk, but it's in a dam, you know, it's in a cornucopia shape.

01:29:32.240 People don't want to drink it, you know?

01:29:33.740 Well, you just got to find people that, you just got to find a chick that's going to not 1.00

01:29:38.460 be scared of that.

01:29:39.300 Yeah.

01:29:40.320 Yeah.

01:29:40.780 And they're out there.

01:29:41.720 Yeah.

01:29:41.960 I've been dating too many shallow wings, you know, that don't like that candy corn.

01:29:45.900 Yeah.

01:29:46.200 You know, find you a candy corn lover.

01:29:48.760 Yeah.

01:29:49.160 That's what I'm going to do.

01:29:50.200 Come to our Halloween party.

01:29:51.560 I will.

01:29:51.920 I'll have a big old.

01:29:52.960 It'll be on Zoom.

01:29:54.440 Yeah. 1.00

01:29:54.940 As long as your husband brings that damn haircut. 1.00

01:29:56.720 And I've been looking at him in the distance, guys. 1.00

01:29:58.520 I don't, maybe you guys, I don't even know if we said that he was in here, but, and he

01:30:02.860 has an announcement to make actually as well right now.

01:30:05.920 Oh, I do.

01:30:07.120 Oh God.

01:30:07.800 You give him a mic.

01:30:08.140 No, I'm joking.

01:30:08.860 He doesn't.

01:30:09.460 It's like, don't give him a mic. 0.98

01:30:12.160 Holy crap. 0.96

01:30:13.400 We're having dinner with Theo tonight. 0.92

01:30:15.400 Oh.

01:30:16.440 Are we really or no?

01:30:17.880 Yes, we are.

01:30:18.480 He's going to actually be laying on the table.

01:30:19.900 We're going to eat sushi off of him.

01:30:21.440 We're going to actually get to have dinner and dessert.

01:30:24.040 That's great.

01:30:25.080 I like that.

01:30:25.360 Some candy corn for dessert.

01:30:26.700 Exactly.

01:30:27.500 Yeah.

01:30:28.620 I'm laying on my stomach for the first course and on my back for the second, baby.

01:30:32.940 Yes, sir.

01:30:34.700 But you guys have a new studio that you guys are going to put together, right?

01:30:37.400 You want to talk about that or no?

01:30:38.780 Yeah.

01:30:39.020 We're working on it.

01:30:40.520 It should be finished first week of September.

01:30:43.740 It's in our home.

01:30:44.500 Our house was built in the 70s and the room is underneath the staircase, but it's a big

01:30:48.860 room and it was not finished when we moved in.

01:30:51.660 It was like a safe room.

01:30:52.840 Oh my God.

01:30:53.400 Even in the day, people have safe rooms, so the walls weren't finished.

01:30:56.660 When we bought the house, we found an old phone in there from the 70s.

01:30:59.680 We found old porn magazines in the walls.

01:31:02.540 Yeah.

01:31:03.520 So I haven't seen the room yet.

01:31:05.620 It's for my podcast that I'll be starting.

01:31:08.180 Greg hasn't let me see in the room, but he's been working on it for months, so it's going

01:31:11.160 to be real nice.

01:31:12.920 Yeah.

01:31:13.040 That's cool, huh?

01:31:14.260 Yeah.

01:31:14.600 You can tell he's excited about it too.

01:31:16.080 It's cool.

01:31:16.460 Right when he came in, I could just see he was so excited.

01:31:18.680 And it just, it hit me.

01:31:20.840 It just made me feel excited.

01:31:22.320 Yeah.

01:31:22.700 He's sweet.

01:31:23.480 Bless his heart.

01:31:24.120 He seems decent.

01:31:24.660 He's very sweet.

01:31:25.460 He seems just damn decent, which is the, it's as good as you can get these days for a man.

01:31:29.980 We'll have to have you out there for our podcast.

01:31:32.180 Dude, I would love to come down.

01:31:34.040 That would be really cool.

01:31:35.320 We'll treat you to some dinner too.

01:31:37.000 Okay.

01:31:37.660 Make you a brisket.

01:31:38.780 Okay, dude, I'll do it all.

01:31:40.380 Yeah.

01:31:40.540 We'll do it all.

01:31:41.260 I would love to come down and I'm going to put it out in the world.

01:31:45.060 I want to get Dolly and we'll have you come to Nashville and we'll do a 1.00

01:31:48.660 just a dang episode.

01:31:50.560 Let's do it.

01:31:51.680 It's got to happen, right?

01:31:52.680 It has to.

01:31:53.240 It's going to happen.

01:31:54.060 It's going to happen.

01:31:54.660 It will happen.

01:31:55.460 It could happen.

01:31:55.980 It used to be a little Boosie was the goal and now it's Dolly Parton. 1.00

01:31:58.740 I wonder if she'll need a pound of weed. 1.00

01:32:01.000 I don't know.

01:32:01.520 That's true.

01:32:02.080 Dolly?

01:32:02.720 Oh, God.

01:32:03.420 Boosie did. 1.00

01:32:03.980 Oh.

01:32:04.500 Yeah, we had a surplus Boosie.

01:32:06.900 Wow.

01:32:08.940 And you don't, the podcast starts when you said?

01:32:10.940 You don't know yet?

01:32:11.520 I don't know yet.

01:32:12.180 We're, you know, no rush on it.

01:32:13.880 Hopefully in the next couple months.

01:32:15.340 I love it.

01:32:15.900 Yeah.

01:32:16.220 If you haven't seen Chelsea, which I don't know how you haven't because she's all over 0.73

01:32:19.700 everything now, you got to check her out and we'll share all of her socials and everything

01:32:25.440 and just thanks so much.

01:32:27.160 Over the years, you've just been so encouraging.

01:32:28.660 Even at times, you've just said something nice or just mentioned me on Instagram or anything.

01:32:34.120 I just appreciate it.

01:32:35.380 Thank you. 0.85

01:32:35.780 Well, you know I'm a huge fucking fan of yours, so thank you for having me. 0.95

01:32:39.100 Well, same. 0.99

01:32:39.740 Back at you.

01:32:39.960 Oh, my God.

01:32:40.560 Thanks for coming.

01:32:41.220 Thank you.

01:32:41.440 Yep.

01:32:41.700 Now I'm just floating on the breeze and I feel I'm falling like these leaves.

01:32:47.580 I must be cornerstone.

01:32:52.680 Oh, but when I reach that ground, I'll share this peace of mind I found.

01:32:58.340 I can feel it in my bones.

01:33:01.700 But it's going to take a little time for me to set that parking brake and let myself unwind.

01:33:14.980 Shine that light on me.

01:33:17.900 I'll sit and tell you my stories Shine on me And I will find a song I will sing it just for you

01:33:36.560 And I've been moving way too fast On a runaway train with a heavy load of mouth

01:33:47.020 Past

01:33:48.700 And these wheels that I've been riding on They're worn so thin that they're damn near gone

01:33:57.040 I guess now they just weren't built in

01:33:59.720 Ladies and gentlemen, I'm Jonathan Kite and welcome to Kite Club,

01:34:04.480 a podcast where I'll be sharing thoughts on things like current events, stand-up stories,

01:34:09.740 and seven ways to pleasure your partner.

01:34:12.260 The answer may shock you.

01:34:13.980 Sometimes I'll interview my friends.

01:34:16.060 Sometimes I won't.

01:34:17.720 And as always, I'll be joined by the voices in my head.

01:34:20.700 You have three new voice messages.

01:34:23.700 A lot of people are talking about Kite Club.

01:34:26.580 I've been talking about Kite Club for so long.

01:34:29.240 Longer than anybody else.

01:34:30.860 So great.

01:34:31.480 I think Tom Hanks just butt-dialed me.

01:34:50.860 Anyway, first rule of Kite Club is, tell everyone about Kite Club.

01:34:55.200 Second rule of Kite Club is, tell everyone about Kite Club.

01:34:59.420 Third rule.

01:35:00.380 Like and subscribe wherever you listen to podcasts.

01:35:03.100 Or watch us on YouTube, yeah?

01:35:04.780 And yes, don't worry.

01:35:06.260 My Brad Pitt impression will get better.

This Past Weekend with Theo Von - August 20, 2020

E292 Chelcie Lynn

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