This Past Weekend with Theo Von - November 01, 2022


E415 Bubba Sparxxx


Episode Stats


Length

2 hours and 17 minutes

Words per minute

213.77402

Word count

29,483

Sentence count

1,740

Harmful content

Misogyny

26

sentences flagged

Toxicity

352

sentences flagged

Hate speech

56

sentences flagged


Summary

Summaries generated with gmurro/bart-large-finetuned-filtered-spotify-podcast-summ .

Bubba Sparks has been a fixture in the rap and hip hop community. He was a part of a lot of our adolescence and young adulthoods. He s a new friend and I m grateful to spend time with him and hear about his journey as an entertainer and a human.

Transcript

Transcript generated with Whisper (turbo).
Misogyny classifications generated with MilaNLProc/bert-base-uncased-ear-misogyny .
Toxicity classifications generated with s-nlp/roberta_toxicity_classifier .
Hate speech classifications generated with facebook/roberta-hate-speech-dynabench-r4-target .
00:00:00.000 We hope you're enjoying your Air Canada flight.
00:00:02.300 Rocky's vacation, here we come.
00:00:05.060 Whoa, is this economy?
00:00:07.180 Free beer, wine, and snacks.
00:00:09.620 Sweet! 0.95
00:00:10.720 Fast-free Wi-Fi means I can make dinner reservations before we land.
00:00:14.760 And with live TV, I'm not missing the game.
00:00:17.800 It's kind of like, I'm already on vacation.
00:00:20.980 Nice! 0.94
00:00:22.160 On behalf of Air Canada, nice travels.
00:00:25.260 Wi-Fi available to Airplane members on Equipped Flight.
00:00:27.340 Sponsored by Bell. Conditions apply.
00:00:28.560 See AirCanada.com.
00:00:30.000 We got new merch, some new colorways in the Be Good to Yourself collection.
00:00:37.020 We've got hoodies in plum and moss.
00:00:40.660 We've also got t-shirts in lilac, moss, and blue mist.
00:00:46.220 I hope you enjoy those. Those are good colors.
00:00:49.600 Get that hitter and more at TheovanStore.com.
00:00:53.200 I want to let you know that we have some new tour dates to announce.
00:00:57.600 January 11th and 12th in Grand Junction, Colorado.
00:01:03.360 We've added a new show there.
00:01:05.980 January 13th, Pueblo, Colorado.
00:01:10.960 January 14th, Denver.
00:01:13.880 We have two shows there.
00:01:15.760 January 15th, down in Fort Collin, Colorado.
00:01:19.980 We're excited to be at the fort.
00:01:22.200 And March 1st, 3rd, and 4th in Boston, Massachusetts.
00:01:30.080 And March 2nd in Medford, Massachusetts.
00:01:34.400 Those are all available at Theovan.com slash T-O-U-R.
00:01:40.000 And that will be the Return of the Rat Tour.
00:01:43.880 Today's guest has been a fixture in the rap and hip-hop community.
00:01:50.560 He was a part of a lot of our adolescence and young adulthoods.
00:01:57.480 He's a new friend.
00:02:01.060 And I'm grateful to spend time with him and hear about his journey as an entertainer and as a human.
00:02:08.340 And today's guest is Mr. Bubba Sparks.
00:02:11.820 Shine that light on me
00:02:16.020 I'll sit and tell you my stories
00:02:22.020 Shine on me
00:02:26.720 And I will find a song
00:02:30.920 I've been singing
00:02:32.140 Almost!
00:02:38.340 Bubba Sparks, baby.
00:02:40.760 What's up, Big Theo?
00:02:41.800 Staying alive, man.
00:02:43.400 Staying alive.
00:02:44.280 Staying alive.
00:02:45.100 Pleasantly present.
00:02:46.620 Yeah, trying to be...
00:02:47.420 That's a big thing, is trying to stay present for me.
00:02:50.280 I get so caught up sometimes in thinking about everything that I need to do
00:02:53.400 or things I haven't done
00:02:55.740 and I will get...
00:02:57.460 What's that?
00:02:57.940 They always say, you probably heard it, some of the same places that we've been.
00:03:01.760 If you've got one foot in tomorrow
00:03:03.320 and one foot in yesterday 0.99
00:03:04.820 you're pissing and shitting all over the day. 0.99
00:03:06.540 Oh, I never heard that. 1.00
00:03:07.700 Yeah, I got a few sayings for you.
00:03:12.060 Yeah, I bet we probably have a lot of the same.
00:03:13.920 So you...
00:03:14.500 Because you and I kind of connected over like talking about sobriety and stuff.
00:03:17.240 Right, right.
00:03:18.120 You know?
00:03:19.140 Can you move this mic just over?
00:03:20.500 No, no, you don't have to move.
00:03:21.840 But you can move.
00:03:22.460 It's whatever.
00:03:23.020 As long as it's near your beak.
00:03:24.640 Yeah.
00:03:24.880 There we go.
00:03:25.920 And yeah, feel free to move it or whatever.
00:03:27.160 I'm not sure what to do with my hands.
00:03:28.780 Just do whatever.
00:03:29.300 I'm just flying.
00:03:29.940 There's no real way to...
00:03:30.720 You know what you do, man. 1.00
00:03:31.120 I was just talking shit, man. 1.00
00:03:32.560 I was doing Ricky Bobby. 1.00
00:03:34.000 Oh.
00:03:36.100 Yeah, so what's that been like in your life, man?
00:03:39.060 Man, it's just been a back and forth journey.
00:03:41.320 You know what I'm saying?
00:03:41.960 I mean, it's just been...
00:03:43.580 You know, I've had some periods of recovery.
00:03:48.500 You know what I'm saying?
00:03:49.020 And I've had some periods of sobriety.
00:03:51.060 You know what I'm saying?
00:03:51.560 That weren't necessarily like filled with great recovery.
00:03:55.000 You know what I'm saying?
00:03:55.380 And there's a difference, as you know.
00:03:56.960 You know what I'm saying?
00:03:57.400 And sometimes I was just kind of white-knuckling it, you know.
00:03:59.820 And sometimes...
00:04:01.000 And then sometimes I'm kind of just either on the way to, you know, things getting bad
00:04:07.100 or, like, on the way to things back getting good.
00:04:09.140 You know what I'm saying?
00:04:09.620 At what point is, like, that turn four, you know what I'm saying, so to speak, on the racetrack, you know?
00:04:15.000 Yeah.
00:04:15.320 But, you know, I just...
00:04:17.720 I went to treatment back in February, you know?
00:04:22.060 And it was good.
00:04:23.980 But I wouldn't claim to be sober right now.
00:04:26.480 Was it a 30...
00:04:27.380 What is it like?
00:04:28.840 I mean...
00:04:29.100 I did 35 days of inpatient, you know what I'm saying?
00:04:32.500 And it was kind of weird because of all the COVID protocols.
00:04:34.840 So, like, you know how normally when you go to treatment, you can, like, get to go to outside meetings
00:04:39.340 and all that stuff.
00:04:39.960 You can find a sponsor that way and all that stuff.
00:04:41.920 We were literally, like, stuck in this one house, like, for...
00:04:45.340 It was cold months, so it was, like, kind of...
00:04:47.440 It was a good deal to be stuck inside, but, man, it got kind of stir-crazy in the joint, for sure.
00:04:52.760 And was it all men in there?
00:04:54.960 No, there was some women, but they had, like, a different little house that they actually would sleep in. 1.00
00:04:58.460 And they had to go there, like, after 8 o'clock, they had to go get in their house.
00:05:01.580 But I ain't gonna say I heard tell of some intermingling after hours, you know what I'm saying?
00:05:06.740 Yeah.
00:05:07.020 But, yeah, I definitely wasn't on that type of vibe.
00:05:10.860 I have, you know, in other trips to treatment, I've kind of, you know, been all about the female patients.
00:05:18.980 Oh, yeah, they get some real, yeah.
00:05:21.080 Especially, man, if I'm coming off of pills, I want to pet something, you know?
00:05:24.420 Man, well, it's just anytime, you know, we fill that hole, that internal hole, external anything, you know what I'm saying?
00:05:30.360 And so it's like, man, if you take away what my primary, like, tool I was using to try to fill that hole, even though it was just ultimately making the hole bigger.
00:05:39.280 But if you just, if you take that, whatever thing I was using, I'm going to have to find something else.
00:05:43.420 It might be cheeseburgers, you know what I'm saying?
00:05:45.320 It might be gambling.
00:05:46.840 It might be women, you know? 1.00
00:05:47.960 Yeah.
00:05:48.280 It might be men, whatever. 1.00
00:05:49.660 Yeah, oh, damn, bro. 0.99
00:05:50.680 I haven't been there yet, but. 0.99
00:05:51.980 Yeah, me either. 0.99
00:05:53.040 Dude, you hit me with the wrong eight ball, I'll fucking, I might meet some young fella, bro. 0.99
00:05:58.400 I ain't meet no old dude, though. 1.00
00:06:00.420 That's fucked up. 0.98
00:06:01.480 Man, I just, I don't know. 0.99
00:06:02.780 I just never had that inclination.
00:06:04.140 If I was gay, I would just be gay, you know what I'm saying? 0.96
00:06:06.780 It wouldn't really, I mean, I can't say that growing up it might not have been, like, kind of a tormenting type thing.
00:06:13.180 Yeah.
00:06:13.320 Growing up in the rural south, you know? 0.95
00:06:14.440 Oh, yeah, you had to be real secret gay back then. 1.00
00:06:16.940 But to be honest with you, like, being a white rapper from LaGrange, Georgia, you know what I'm saying? 0.92
00:06:22.040 Man, it was, it was some of the same type of, like, you know, I don't want to say oppression, but just ridicule that you faced, you know?
00:06:29.380 I never even thought about that.
00:06:31.020 Yeah?
00:06:31.780 Yeah, I guess people, yeah, people probably really would, like, think you're trying to blacken up or something like that.
00:06:39.160 Well, it was kind of, like, not really accepted by either side, you know what I'm saying?
00:06:41.820 Because where I grew up, LaGrange, Georgia, shout out to Trapp County, but it's pretty much 50% black, 50% white, you know what I'm saying? 0.98
00:06:48.840 And so, yeah, definitely the white side wasn't really too, you know what I'm saying, like, open-minded to the prospect of me being a rapper at that time.
00:06:57.300 But, you know, the hood side, the black folks really wasn't too receptive either.
00:07:01.560 It's not like they were just waiting, you know, with open arms as far as that, like, come be a rapper over here.
00:07:05.780 Well, you were early until, I mean, you were like, I mean, you were dang, you were like the dang Neil Armstrong out there. 0.96
00:07:12.460 You was, like, one of the first fucking. 0.95
00:07:13.580 First man on the moon, yeah. 0.99
00:07:14.660 Yeah.
00:07:14.980 For sure.
00:07:15.220 You was, like, one of the first Wiggas on the moon, kind of, in a way, you know?
00:07:18.920 No, I mean, as far as, like, you know, a country boy from the south, you know, or.
00:07:23.160 Did they have that?
00:07:24.220 No.
00:07:24.540 They didn't have it.
00:07:25.380 No, and that's been part of the journey, like, is there was no reference point, you know what I'm saying?
00:07:29.640 Like, I grew up off, like, outcast.
00:07:31.400 I was heavily influenced by outcast, goody mob, the organized noise, the dungeon family.
00:07:36.360 So that was the closest thing because they were the first people to kind of, like, rep Georgia, you know what I'm saying, period, specifically Atlanta.
00:07:43.240 But for me, I was brought up in the country about 60 miles down the road from Atlanta.
00:07:47.620 Oh, man.
00:07:48.220 And so, yeah, there was, and just being a white boy or whatever, there was definitely nobody for me to look at.
00:07:52.940 Even though I did learn from a lot of other white rappers that were successful, starting with the Beastie Boys, you know, going on to, like, Everlast, House of Pain.
00:08:00.640 Even third base to some degree.
00:08:03.200 But then Eminem, you know what I'm saying, it was right, Eminem was about a year before me, you know what I'm saying?
00:08:09.240 And when he came, I was like, oh, that's perfection right there, the way that was executed.
00:08:13.200 So, like, but I knew, you know, shout out to Vanilla Ice. 0.92
00:08:18.120 He's actually my dog.
00:08:19.600 Like, I've done shows with him, and we've had a ball.
00:08:22.560 He's a cool cat.
00:08:23.380 I've met him a few times.
00:08:24.200 Yeah, he's a good dude, man.
00:08:25.180 You know, but at that time, there was, like, after his Ice Ice Baby reign, kind of, like, when he sold, like, 15 million albums, which you can't take, everybody was listening, everybody was jamming Ice Ice Baby.
00:08:35.520 I don't care what nobody says now.
00:08:36.920 Oh, even Vietnamese were like, you know, Ice Ice Baby, you know, everybody had it. 1.00
00:08:41.580 Hey, you know, projects, albums don't sell 15 million, singles don't sell 30 million or whatever it sold without everybody liking it. 1.00
00:08:49.440 Dude, everybody liked that shit. 1.00
00:08:51.840 Everybody got the big pants. 1.00
00:08:53.380 When you really hit, when you affect people's, you know, when you go through their ears and come out their clothing. 0.98
00:08:58.340 I mean, I remember so many white boys, and I wasn't quite old enough to attempt a stunt like this, but I remember white boys getting even, like, the little haircut that he had and shit. 0.95
00:09:06.440 And it was just like, dang, man, you were so cool. 0.96
00:09:09.060 You got a Vanilla Ice haircut, you know what I'm saying?
00:09:10.980 But that wasn't really something I was on.
00:09:12.880 But just to keep going, there was some kind of discrepancies with his story about where he was from and what he was representing as far as being a hood kid or whatever.
00:09:22.700 And so after that, I kind of just learned it was like a lull.
00:09:25.600 It was like a five or six year period where nobody was checking for white rappers, you know what I'm saying? 0.82
00:09:29.860 But I knew, like, you just got to represent who you are, you know what I'm saying?
00:09:33.420 Like, everything that's in the spirit of hip-hop and where hip-hop comes from and, like, the principles, you know, the guiding principles are based on, like, you know, just truly, truly, accurately, honestly represent who you are, where you come from, and what it was like there, and tell your story honestly, you know what I'm saying?
00:09:50.820 And that's going to work, you know what I'm saying?
00:09:53.040 If you do it and you figure out a way to make it dope. 0.78
00:09:54.660 And so I had developed that within myself, because, like, my first raps I ever wrote, like, in 1992, like, at my mom's kitchen table in the ninth grade, were, like, was just rolling in the benzo, letting the bass drop when five motherfuckers roll by on a drop top, like, you know, talking about, like, boys in the hood, like, because I didn't know how to.
00:10:14.460 And that was part of the, what you're talking about, like, the whole journey of me trying to figure out how within using hip-hop as the outlet, expressing who I was and where I came from, you know, growing up on a farm, you know what I'm saying?
00:10:26.960 Yeah, farm, but some of the animals got gold chains on.
00:10:30.060 Yeah, man, I just, I never cared about music.
00:10:33.040 Music was all around me.
00:10:34.500 I had an older brother that loved, like, metal bands, like Iron Maiden.
00:10:38.400 Big shout-out to Russ.
00:10:39.740 Iron Maiden's his favorite band, all-time band, so he was into that type of music.
00:10:43.240 Then I had my oldest brother, Jay, shout-out to Jay.
00:10:45.660 He liked, like, Parliament Funk, Camelot, you know what I'm saying, George Clinton, all that kind of stuff.
00:10:50.280 Yeah, I love P-Funk.
00:10:50.720 Yeah, P-Funk. 0.97
00:10:51.860 And then my dad likes, like, throwback country, you know, traditional country.
00:10:55.520 And my mama just likes to dance, you know what I'm saying? 0.92
00:10:57.740 So music was all around, but it just didn't speak to me, you know what I'm saying?
00:11:01.380 I didn't care about it.
00:11:02.660 It was just something in the background.
00:11:04.240 But when I heard them, somebody say, hey, we want some putt.
00:11:08.560 When I heard that, I was like, what is that? 0.99
00:11:10.340 Then when I heard Boys in the Hood, when I heard Too Short, I was like, what the fuck is this? 0.99
00:11:14.980 You know what I'm saying? 1.00
00:11:15.080 You didn't know you had, maybe you didn't even know you had that in you.
00:11:17.620 Man, it just spoke, I knew it was good.
00:11:19.320 When I heard Brass Monkey by the Beastie Boys, like, I heard it and it was just like, man,
00:11:23.620 this is going to be a part of my life forever.
00:11:25.420 I just feel it, it just speaks to me.
00:11:26.940 Like, I don't know, the raw expression, the 808 drum, like, man, it was a lot to do with
00:11:32.820 that 808, honestly, man, like, for real, because that wasn't really a part, the boom bap was
00:11:36.800 kind of like, like the New York wave of hip hop, but when the West Coast finally got its
00:11:41.240 turn, it was like Too Short in WA, like, that 808 drum was rattling, you know what I'm saying? 0.87
00:11:46.420 Dude, I remember, yeah, when some of that shit came through our neighborhood, because I 0.96
00:11:50.480 probably grew up, I didn't grow up country, I just grew up in like a rural kind of white 0.98
00:11:53.760 area, because Louisiana doesn't get like a redneck vibe, Louisiana is just, it's a lot 0.62
00:11:59.240 of like, grandchildren like pirates, you got Cajun people, you got a lot of mix, kind
00:12:05.020 of like a lot of yellow skin, kind of like light skinned black dudes, you got some kind 0.99
00:12:09.980 of dark, yeah, you got some people just fucking, you don't know what color they are, bro, they 1.00
00:12:15.100 don't even know, fuck. 1.00
00:12:16.380 Nah, Louisiana's a different kind of place now. 1.00
00:12:18.100 They got a lot of pirates, grandchildren are pirates and shit like that, you know, these 0.99
00:12:21.640 guys got to, oh, Broadnecks, you know, there's a country rapper that's doing his thing right 0.99
00:12:25.100 now that, he's from Monroe, Louisiana.
00:12:27.180 And he's getting hit, they call him Broadneck?
00:12:28.860 Broadnecks, that's his last name.
00:12:30.080 Oh, Broadnecks. 1.00
00:12:30.320 Yeah, John, I think it's John Broadnecks or whatever, but he's representing Louisiana,
00:12:34.560 he's got that Louisiana flavor about the way he does his thing, but it's like kind of country
00:12:39.220 white boy, you know, Louisiana type flavor, which I wouldn't call it like country, country,
00:12:44.040 like farm type country, it's just more like swampy.
00:12:47.300 Yeah.
00:12:47.820 Yeah.
00:12:48.440 So you, so you're, so yeah, you were just trying to express yourself really.
00:12:53.200 Yeah.
00:12:53.580 And then it was just, it's kind of like a puzzle too.
00:12:55.660 You're just trying to figure out how to fit the pieces together and make it seem cool
00:12:59.200 ultimately, you know what I'm saying?
00:13:00.660 Because, I mean, there are some pretty interesting dynamics to rural life, you know what I'm saying?
00:13:05.500 That maybe some people just aren't typically aware of, you know what I'm saying?
00:13:10.340 But just how to, it's not, I'm not trying to say that violence in a community and all that
00:13:14.980 stuff is cool, it's a terrible thing.
00:13:17.500 But ultimately, if you're representing yourself as a person that made it, persevered and made
00:13:21.940 it through that and that's your testimony of like, you know what I'm saying?
00:13:24.660 That's cool.
00:13:25.500 Right.
00:13:25.780 You know what I'm saying?
00:13:26.320 And it's hard, you know what I'm saying?
00:13:28.080 But basically, I just, I was like, well, this is it, you know what I'm saying?
00:13:32.160 I got to just give it what I have to offer, you know what I'm saying?
00:13:34.760 And I just told the story of what I had been through and what my life had been like.
00:13:40.320 And, you know, there was enough people that related to it for me to be able to keep doing
00:13:44.400 this as a job without having to get a real job for 20-something years, you know what I'm saying?
00:13:48.220 Yeah, dude, everybody. 0.98
00:13:49.480 I mean, I fucking, it was crazy, man. 0.98
00:13:51.380 When you hit the scene, it was just. 0.99
00:13:53.720 It was special, man.
00:13:54.740 It was special, man.
00:13:56.400 Did, what was some of the pressure of that?
00:13:58.320 Like, because, yeah, they just didn't have anything like you.
00:14:03.800 All of a sudden, you're like kind of mixing two worlds.
00:14:07.320 You're probably not like, yeah, maybe some, I could imagine maybe especially where you're 0.87
00:14:11.820 from, some white people could see like, oh, this is too, this is too black for us. 1.00
00:14:18.040 And the hood, the hood, you're never, the hood fucking, you're never hood enough. 0.99
00:14:22.840 Even if you, like, the hood will always be like, you're never hood enough. 0.99
00:14:25.880 You know, it's like there's always that, even in the black community, you know. 1.00
00:14:29.000 But at the end of the day, when you just are being you, you know what I'm saying?
00:14:32.140 Like, and I never compromised me, you know what I'm saying?
00:14:34.880 I really didn't.
00:14:35.400 I never did.
00:14:36.400 There were some things that I might have done that I would have preferred to have highlighted
00:14:40.340 other aspects of who I really am.
00:14:42.540 But there's nothing I did that wasn't, you know, a certain shade of like who I am, you
00:14:47.180 know what I'm saying?
00:14:47.700 Like truthfully.
00:14:48.680 And so it's kind of like just being at peace.
00:14:51.160 You know, I went through so much when I was younger as far as like trying to really just figure
00:14:54.840 out like, because I mean, to say that people didn't support me in my pursuit of this, of
00:15:03.140 rap music, hip hop as a career, would be a pretty big understatement.
00:15:06.800 You know, I would say more like people didn't even kind of like stop chuckling behind my back
00:15:11.840 until I had actually like, I was on MTV, you know what I'm saying?
00:15:14.880 And so I was well accustomed and adjusted to like people not supporting me, you know, to
00:15:20.880 have to be that self-propelling, you know, type deal.
00:15:25.300 Well, that happens, I think, with a lot of like, I remember when I was a comedian, like
00:15:28.940 it was like, or until like you, somebody sees you on something, you are just some dude, you
00:15:35.360 are like some guy that don't want to get a real job.
00:15:38.320 And everybody just thinks you're full of, you know what I'm saying?
00:15:41.100 Like everybody just thinks at the end of the day, because, you know, I mean, I'm a creative
00:15:45.860 person, you know what I'm saying?
00:15:46.940 And I played football and that's like the big deal, like where I grew up, like high school
00:15:50.900 football, you know, it's like Friday Night Lights type of deal for sure.
00:15:54.880 You know, I was pretty good at football.
00:15:56.000 My best friend, Steve Hernan, shout out to him.
00:15:58.300 He was great at football, you know what I'm saying?
00:16:00.200 He was one of the top 100 highest recruited players in the country, went to Georgia, was all
00:16:05.040 SEC, played in the NFL for seven years.
00:16:07.680 But so I love football.
00:16:09.340 Football is my first love, to be honest with you.
00:16:11.340 And it was interesting because music was actually his first love.
00:16:14.500 And we ended up living vicariously through one another.
00:16:17.320 But when I saw how I was like, man, he's what the deal deal is.
00:16:23.520 And I'm just not quite that, you know what I'm saying?
00:16:25.960 So, man, what can I be great, great at?
00:16:29.060 You know what I'm saying?
00:16:29.560 And I had never bumped my head on the ceiling as far as my potential with football pretty early.
00:16:35.340 But I was like, man, I just really think I can do the music thing.
00:16:37.760 I just, the first time I ever sat down to write a rap, I was like, man, I just got a knack
00:16:40.980 for this, for just putting words together, making them rhyme and just being clever.
00:16:45.060 And just, I don't know, I just always, somewhere deep down in my heart, even though I tried
00:16:49.780 to do other things because it wasn't easy.
00:16:52.680 Like I said, there was no acceptance for it.
00:16:54.680 You know, we all crave being accepted, you know what I'm saying, on some level or another
00:16:58.860 by the people around us.
00:16:59.980 And nobody was really, my closest friends, like Big Steve, like he, he believed in me
00:17:04.940 100%.
00:17:05.900 You know what I'm saying?
00:17:06.520 I'd be up at University of Georgia, I ended up moving up to Athens, Georgia, and being
00:17:10.980 up there, like, you know, freestyling after football games and stuff, and like, all the
00:17:15.800 guys on the team, you know what I'm saying?
00:17:17.280 Just like, Andy's what they called me back then, and just like, Andy, flow for him one
00:17:21.940 time, flow for him one time.
00:17:23.240 You know what I'm saying?
00:17:23.680 And like, and just all the, all those guys being up there and just being like, that's
00:17:27.100 before it had iPod, you was the iPod.
00:17:29.160 No doubt.
00:17:30.080 And like, I, as far as battling, like, everybody would try to go back home and find the best
00:17:34.260 rapper in their little area and get him to come up. 0.99
00:17:36.200 Get him, I'll bring his little ass out in a wheelbarrow. 1.00
00:17:37.940 He gonna serve your boy. 1.00
00:17:38.400 He gonna serve your boy.
00:17:39.540 And then, you know what I'm saying?
00:17:40.640 It just wasn't happening.
00:17:41.640 You know what I'm saying?
00:17:42.180 It just, so I would sit there and literally go back and just write and write, you know what
00:17:45.600 I'm saying?
00:17:45.780 Because I've never been a freestyler, because I didn't grow up around other people rapping.
00:17:49.060 You know what I'm saying?
00:17:49.580 And so people develop that freestyling ability, I think, when they're in groups of people
00:17:53.500 rapping.
00:17:53.980 But it was a long time before I was around other people that were like, seriously even,
00:17:58.860 you know, rapping, putting words together like that.
00:18:01.440 So when you like, so how did, didn't you start to take off?
00:18:04.440 How did your career, how did you, how did it go from that where you're just kind of rapping
00:18:07.920 and becoming like acclaimed amongst people in Georgia, amongst like after parties and stuff
00:18:13.460 like that before social media?
00:18:16.100 How did you get to that next space?
00:18:18.100 That's a good question, because I always tell people now, like, this era the way it
00:18:21.700 is, I don't even, I wouldn't know where to start telling somebody how to get on, you
00:18:25.920 know what I'm saying, how to make it happen.
00:18:27.240 You know, just when people ask me for advice, I'd be like, look, just pray that this is
00:18:30.740 what God wants for you, if it's what you really want, you know, and burn bridges.
00:18:35.800 Like, and I don't mean burn bridges in terms of relationships, but in the pursuit of this
00:18:39.360 thing, if you leave yourself out, and I know, you know this as far as like the comedy
00:18:43.540 thing too, if you leave yourself out, at some point you're going to take one of them,
00:18:47.360 you know what I'm saying, because it's tough, you know what I'm saying, you know, and so
00:18:50.960 I, I burnt my, some bridges, or as coach of Georgia, Kirby Smart would say, burn the
00:18:56.840 boats, you know what I'm saying, like, there was just nowhere for me to go other than this,
00:19:01.040 you know what I'm saying, if this didn't happen, I, I shudder to think what, what might have
00:19:05.680 been, you know what I'm saying.
00:19:06.420 A certain number of years in, especially, it's like, once you get up to like 25, 20,
00:19:11.420 people are like, what's going on, you're not in college, you don't have this degree, you
00:19:14.780 don't have a child, you don't have a family, people are like, you better show something.
00:19:19.260 You know, and my best friend was like playing football at Georgia, and you know, he was on
00:19:22.920 the way to the NFL, and it was honestly, it hurt me so bad, because I loved him so much,
00:19:26.820 and was so supportive of him, and I now believe, believe that that was God preparing me, you
00:19:31.820 know, because like, I learned how to not be a hater, you know what I'm saying, and a
00:19:36.100 lot of people probably looked at me, definitely looked at me as like a hindrance on him even,
00:19:40.220 you know what I'm saying, like, like, you know, Steve be alright if, you know, if, just
00:19:44.640 get away from old Andy, you know what I'm saying, like, kind of looked at me as like the loser,
00:19:48.100 but Steve, he never bought into that, he never subscribed to that, you know what I'm saying,
00:19:51.200 he was always like, tell people like, you know, he gonna do something big, I don't know
00:19:55.500 when it's gonna be, or what exactly it's gonna be, maybe this music thing, maybe not,
00:19:59.380 he gonna do something big, you know, he always believed in me, never blinked, and then.
00:20:04.040 Had you had that kind of belief before in your life, had you had someone you feel like
00:20:07.460 believe in you that, like, like that, like, um.
00:20:10.400 No, other than him, honestly, I mean, it's not that my, my parents and his parents, they,
00:20:15.800 it was love, you know what I'm saying, but it was like, it was just so far beyond their
00:20:20.220 realm of comprehension, you know, that it might even be remotely feasible for something
00:20:24.760 like that to happen, especially being a white boy and coming from down there, but I just
00:20:29.120 always looked at it like this, I always had, like, this innate feeling like, hey, I'm just,
00:20:32.740 I'm gonna do something special, I'm special, I'm different, you know, I'm not, not in a
00:20:35.920 bad way, because I've never not been humble, but just like, you know, just really feeling
00:20:40.920 like there's just something out there waiting for me that I just gotta find it and pluck
00:20:45.540 it out of the sky or whatever, and, um, and so I, um, I just basically, like, I didn't
00:20:51.780 never think, sometimes I, I felt like, you know, it was, it was gonna be something like,
00:20:59.180 because my, my, my fallback plan was being a, a high school history teacher and a, and
00:21:03.240 a high school football coach. 0.99
00:21:04.580 Oh, damn, I'd love to see you fucking remix, oh, bro, remix the Civil War, dog? 1.00
00:21:10.660 Yeah, no doubt. 1.00
00:21:11.240 I'd love to see that, bro, fucking get, get, get, get, get, get, get, get, get, get. 0.98
00:21:14.240 Oh, I got a crazy theory on that, too, on, like, you know, like, you know, when you have, 0.98
00:21:18.480 like, the feeling, this is a tangential, but I think it's pretty interesting.
00:21:21.620 There's people listening just because, people right now are stacking shells, they're driving 0.97
00:21:25.100 to Amazon, they're fucking beating their spouse, they don't know what, everybody listens. 0.94
00:21:28.860 Y'all rock steady out there, but, um, but, um, as far as, like, man, I just, I feel 0.98
00:21:33.440 like in the future, like, I think, you know how we get that feeling like, everybody says, like,
00:21:38.080 you just know something's in the room with you, or you, like, hear something crazy or
00:21:42.020 whatever, I've kind of developed a theory on this, and maybe you, I'd like to hear your
00:21:46.140 thoughts on it, so I think that in the future, you know, like, how in history class now,
00:21:52.780 you know, like, we go through books and look at pictures and listen to speeches or whatever
00:21:57.360 of these, that mark these certain, you know, historical events or whatever, I think in
00:22:01.540 the future, the reason that we hear these weird things and, like, it's like these, I don't
00:22:07.020 know what you would call it, not ghosts, but, like, some of them probably are mistaken
00:22:10.300 for ghosts, I think in the future, time travel is actually possible, and people come back
00:22:15.720 and, like, can actually be present, but it's, it's, like, in a different dimension, so they
00:22:19.600 can, like, see it, but they're not really present, they're, like, in danger, and actually
00:22:22.820 be on the battlefield at Gettysburg and stuff like that.
00:22:25.860 Oh, wow.
00:22:26.580 Yeah, that's, that's just something that.
00:22:28.180 So you're saying, like, in the future, you could have, like, Gettysburg.
00:22:30.780 Yeah, basically.
00:22:31.420 A whole class, a whole field trip could go.
00:22:33.060 They're sitting there looking at the battle actually taking place. 1.00
00:22:35.300 Damn. 0.99
00:22:35.680 But see, they're not, the, the whole back there. 0.99
00:22:37.860 Right, they don't know that they're there.
00:22:39.080 And the whole, no, yeah, the people that are fighting the battle don't, but, like, the
00:22:42.000 whole back to the future thing, and, like, about, like, you know, messing it up and all
00:22:45.660 that stuff, that's not, that's not a threat, because you're, like, in a different dimension.
00:22:50.380 Right.
00:22:50.880 You know what I'm saying?
00:22:51.360 So you're, you can observe it, but you're not actually present, but, man, I really think
00:22:55.320 that's.
00:22:56.200 Like, you threw some, like, secret drywall or something, like, they don't know you're there,
00:22:59.480 but you're there.
00:22:59.900 It's just, you're in a different, some kind of different, you know, like, thing. 1.00
00:23:02.840 Dude, I used to think, look, I love this shit. 0.99
00:23:04.600 I used to think that, so people had CDs and eight trays, you know, this and that. 0.99
00:23:08.600 People had, I always thought that they were going to come out with a dashboard that was,
00:23:15.020 like, some sort of a screen, right, in a vehicle, and you would put, you would just press
00:23:20.600 in whatever you wanted to listen to, and then, like, Bubba Spark would come and perform
00:23:26.500 on your dashboard like a hologram.
00:23:28.560 Yeah.
00:23:29.040 I always thought that that would be the next thing. 0.98
00:23:31.180 Like, if you wanted to watch ACDC, you would just type it in, and then, damn, they would 0.94
00:23:35.580 come out there, and actually, you're just driving, and they're right there, you know? 0.51
00:23:39.200 I mean, it's, I mean, that's, that's, like, the next step in the evolution of just music
00:23:42.700 videos and, like, streaming period, though, you know what I'm saying?
00:23:45.780 It's probably not, it's probably, because they have those holograms, like, of Tupac.
00:23:49.960 I remember there was, like, that, that thing, so, I mean, we, technology, if you went back
00:23:54.400 a hundred years from, from this, like, so, if you went back to 1922.
00:23:57.700 Oh, you blow somebody's mind, bro.
00:23:58.660 I mean, but, like, so much more than you would if you went from 1922 to 1822.
00:24:03.080 Right, they wouldn't be that shocked.
00:24:04.120 Right, exactly.
00:24:05.160 Like, the world didn't change that much. 1.00
00:24:06.920 They'd be like, that's a wheel, bitch. 1.00
00:24:08.320 But, that's just the evidence of the fact that technology is evolving at a much more rapid 0.99
00:24:13.240 rate.
00:24:13.660 So, imagine a hundred years from now.
00:24:16.120 We can't comprehend it.
00:24:17.180 We literally cannot comprehend it, and so.
00:24:20.260 Dude, you know what?
00:24:21.080 Somebody was telling me about, I was talking with someone about this, and they had, what
00:24:27.980 were you talking about?
00:24:28.960 You were talking about a guy with a ladder, and you, another guy said, hey, one day I
00:24:34.520 think we could get to the moon.
00:24:36.200 Yeah.
00:24:36.520 And this dude could only think, nah, we can't get to, we can maybe get to the top of a tree
00:24:40.580 or something.
00:24:41.400 Right.
00:24:42.100 But, I'm not doing a good job of explaining it.
00:24:44.320 Anyway, it was something I learned.
00:24:45.380 No, but I don't remember.
00:24:46.280 I do that same thing all the time.
00:24:47.500 It's like, sometimes we can't comprehend things.
00:24:50.080 Like, it's like.
00:24:50.540 We don't have the words for it sometimes.
00:24:52.240 Right.
00:24:52.500 And it's beyond our brain, even, because we're still thinking within the limitations.
00:24:56.300 The three-dimensional thing.
00:24:57.580 Of this world.
00:24:58.360 We're thinking of our limitations.
00:24:59.480 One of the hardest things I ever saw was like, the way, I forget, I was watching something.
00:25:04.180 This was probably 10, 15 years ago.
00:25:06.220 But, they were explaining the difference.
00:25:07.820 Because, you know, mathematics is like proving that there's like nine dimensions.
00:25:11.040 You know what I'm saying?
00:25:11.540 Like, we just aren't aware of them or haven't discovered them or figured out how to interpret
00:25:16.220 them or, you know, or just see them or be present in them, whatever the case is.
00:25:21.300 But, so like, you know, if we lived in a two-dimensional world, my finger coming at you would just look like
00:25:28.920 a dot.
00:25:29.380 But, because it's a three-dimensional world, you can see all sides of my finger.
00:25:35.220 You know what I'm saying?
00:25:35.880 But, imagine this.
00:25:36.880 If there was some being, God, perhaps, some people might call it that being, that could
00:25:42.160 do time the same way.
00:25:44.900 Who's to say?
00:25:46.980 You know what I'm saying?
00:25:47.400 I could just look all around.
00:25:48.280 Oh, I see what you're saying.
00:25:48.860 Yeah.
00:25:49.080 I could, like, look all around time.
00:25:50.620 Like, you know, the time thing.
00:25:53.020 Right, right.
00:25:53.640 Because time for us just flows like this.
00:25:55.260 Yeah, right.
00:25:55.800 But, what if some dudes just.
00:25:57.100 Go all around.
00:25:57.640 Yeah, this would be like, okay, this is like looking at it from, looking at 2022 from 2014.
00:26:03.680 Okay, now I'm going to go look at 2022 from 2036.
00:26:06.780 You know what I'm saying?
00:26:07.760 So, I don't.
00:26:08.740 Yeah, I wonder if there's other realms we're going to crack.
00:26:11.120 Like, I feel like that has to be the next thing.
00:26:12.820 You would have to believe, that's what God would be.
00:26:15.000 You know what I'm saying?
00:26:15.520 Like, because I remember when I was real little, you know, my pops, I wouldn't necessarily
00:26:21.680 call him like an intellectual, but he's a pretty smart guy.
00:26:24.540 You know what I'm saying?
00:26:25.200 And he would say, I'd be like trying to get him to explain God to me, you know, like,
00:26:29.800 and all these, because I was a very inquisitive kid.
00:26:32.400 And he'd just be like, it's just beyond our realm of comprehension.
00:26:35.840 You know, and that would shut me up every time.
00:26:37.580 He'd be like, you just can't even understand it.
00:26:39.180 It's so, you know what I mean?
00:26:40.240 Like, and honestly, like, that's the truth.
00:26:42.740 You know what I'm saying?
00:26:43.380 Like, whatever it is we're talking about, whatever might be or could be or could, we could
00:26:48.020 evolve into, it's just hard to know.
00:26:50.340 So, but I was listening to something the other day, I watch a lot of YouTube videos, you
00:26:54.940 know what I mean?
00:26:55.720 I'll go down to YouTube.
00:26:57.060 Dude, I love that one with you and Randy Aikens.
00:27:00.320 Oh, Rodney Aikens.
00:27:01.140 Rodney Aikens, bro.
00:27:01.940 Yeah, man, shout out to Rodney, man.
00:27:03.580 Right.
00:27:03.960 Right.
00:27:04.760 Yeah.
00:27:05.060 Right.
00:27:05.460 I like wrecking.
00:27:06.420 I like right.
00:27:07.120 Right, I really, really love.
00:27:08.160 You like wrecking.
00:27:09.300 Yeah.
00:27:09.640 What's up?
00:27:10.140 I like wrecking, man, but I really, really did like right.
00:27:13.480 I don't know what it was.
00:27:14.360 No, that was a pretty good example.
00:27:17.400 To me, that's something I don't normally do as far on the countryside.
00:27:21.760 That's like country music.
00:27:24.300 We rap on it.
00:27:25.480 You know what I'm saying?
00:27:26.100 Yeah.
00:27:26.420 I feel like I do country hip hop.
00:27:28.740 You know what I'm saying?
00:27:29.240 Really, it should be called hip hop country because hip hop is the first thing that I've,
00:27:34.060 you know what I'm saying?
00:27:34.940 Got it.
00:27:35.600 You know, I represent all things that I am.
00:27:37.640 I'm white, you know what I'm saying?
00:27:38.960 Or whatever, I'm country, hip hop, but I'd say I'm hip hop before I'm anything.
00:27:43.620 You know what I'm saying?
00:27:44.220 Because it's just that the hip hop music and culture has done so much for me.
00:27:50.900 I'm so grateful to be all over the world.
00:27:53.640 But I just want to complete land on that thought about right.
00:27:59.820 Some guys like Big Smoke, Cole Ford, I would say those are kind of the like forefathers of
00:28:04.880 that sound.
00:28:05.800 You know what I'm saying?
00:28:06.200 Like, where it's really just more like country music, just with some rapping on it.
00:28:09.920 And it's dope.
00:28:10.660 And that song was incredible.
00:28:12.760 Shout out to Noah Gordon, who worked on writing that song with us.
00:28:17.720 But yeah, and Rodney, I had just come to Nashville.
00:28:20.800 And that was kind of like the 2012 area of like when Florida Georgia Line was first blowing up.
00:28:26.360 And the TV show Nashville was on.
00:28:28.640 You know what I'm saying?
00:28:28.980 Oh, yeah, yeah.
00:28:29.380 And Nashville was kind of like getting that first like, oh, it was like becoming like
00:28:33.160 an international like cool place.
00:28:34.940 Yeah, it was putting this little skirt on for everybody.
00:28:36.500 Yeah, it wasn't just redneck Hollywood anymore.
00:28:38.520 Yeah.
00:28:38.940 And so like, you know, and I came up here and, you know, Rodney, he took a chance on,
00:28:45.380 you know what I'm saying?
00:28:45.860 It wasn't the cool, now like this genre bending collaborations.
00:28:50.660 Yeah, and now you got like Morgan Wallen, Lil Durk, you got, yeah, it's kind of like,
00:28:55.480 it's just like the norm.
00:28:58.920 Everything's real mixed up now.
00:29:00.400 But back then it was, you know, it was actually kind of rolling the dice, you know what I'm
00:29:04.580 saying, with your career to try something like that and to step over that line.
00:29:08.220 And so I'm appreciative of the people that did because, you know, country, I always
00:29:11.900 sought to build a bridge between people, you know what I'm saying, between hip hop and
00:29:17.340 country, the hood and country, you know what I'm saying?
00:29:18.780 Because lower class people just aren't that different, you know what I'm saying?
00:29:22.020 That's the bottom line.
00:29:22.960 That's the thing I was thinking about next.
00:29:24.540 I always wonder why don't, I feel like poor, because as a poor white kid, the first thing
00:29:32.860 you wanted to be was black, I felt like. 0.96
00:29:35.340 Yeah. 0.86
00:29:35.820 I mean, I was a poor white, well, I'm not a poor white kid anymore.
00:29:38.600 I'm not a kid.
00:29:39.340 Yeah, right.
00:29:40.040 You know, and I hate, some of the times I hate having even made any money because I'm 0.93
00:29:43.940 not fucking poor anymore. 0.67
00:29:45.200 I can't, I can't have the same feelings I hate. 0.97
00:29:48.200 Yeah, no, there's something about that, you know what I'm saying?
00:29:50.840 What did CeeLo say?
00:29:51.940 He said, I kind of like being poor.
00:29:53.180 At least I know what my friends here for, you know what I'm saying?
00:29:55.220 Oh, wow.
00:29:55.820 My mom used to say, she would say, if you don't have anything, they can't take anything
00:30:00.960 away from you, she would say.
00:30:02.400 That's right.
00:30:03.280 And it was kind of like. 0.99
00:30:04.520 You really be about some shit when you ain't got nothing else. 0.99
00:30:06.600 You know what I'm saying? 1.00
00:30:07.340 You got nothing to fucking lose, bro. 0.99
00:30:08.680 You don't care. 0.99
00:30:09.400 When death don't even seem like that bad of an alternative, you know what I'm saying? 1.00
00:30:11.400 Yeah, sue me, fuck me, whatever you want to do, man. 1.00
00:30:13.700 Yeah, nothing's going to get you. 1.00
00:30:15.720 It don't matter.
00:30:16.860 But for some reason, yeah, I've related so much, I feel like, to poor black kids when
00:30:21.980 I was young.
00:30:23.080 And I think that it's also just a thing like, we have Ms. Pat on, she says, she's like,
00:30:28.100 black people make things cool, she said.
00:30:31.460 And I don't know if I agree about that with everything.
00:30:33.540 Something for sure.
00:30:34.740 You know, black folks are creators.
00:30:36.040 I mean, there's, you know, there's nothing that you could really, if you look at, you
00:30:39.660 know, I mean, all that's been created by black folks in America, I mean, it's a lot when 1.00
00:30:44.380 it comes to art, especially.
00:30:45.300 Oh, yeah, yeah.
00:30:46.060 You know what I'm saying?
00:30:46.780 Well, they got more art kind of built into them, you know? 0.97
00:30:49.300 Even I feel like if you punch a black dude, a cool sound comes out of them, you know? 1.00
00:30:54.040 It's like, but I just, I'm always a little bit fascinated by what it is, even in my own 0.92
00:31:00.560 life, why I felt like I related to poor.
00:31:02.900 You know what I think, though?
00:31:04.140 I think a lot of times, raw creativity comes from poverty and oppression, you know what
00:31:10.480 I'm saying?
00:31:10.680 From just the struggle, you know what I'm saying?
00:31:12.620 Like, it's.
00:31:13.480 Yeah, maybe I like the, or, because poor black people always had a, when I was young, they 1.00
00:31:18.560 didn't even have any rich black people.
00:31:19.640 They only had, like, Michael Irvin, I think.
00:31:21.660 Bill Cosby.
00:31:22.000 Yeah, Bill Cosby, and maybe, like, the Dallas Cowboys, it felt like.
00:31:26.560 Yeah, and, you know, they probably weren't even that rich, like, you know, what you would,
00:31:30.600 what we thought was rich at that time, probably we wouldn't, they probably were making, like,
00:31:33.960 half a million dollars a year or something, you know, or maybe, because contracts weren't
00:31:37.400 even that lucrative back then, you know what I'm saying?
00:31:39.300 No, the producers were making all the money back then.
00:31:41.620 I mean, they really had them boxed up.
00:31:43.460 But even, like, I remember if they had, like, like, the best job a black person could get 0.96
00:31:48.480 in our town was probably, like, our teacher, you know, like.
00:31:51.020 This was in Baton Rouge?
00:31:51.680 This was in Covington, Louisiana.
00:31:53.340 So it's like.
00:31:54.240 Coaches.
00:31:55.180 Yeah, coaches.
00:31:57.740 Now you see a lot more, like, I went to the first black doctor, like, about maybe seven
00:32:02.420 months ago, I was going to the doctor, and it was a black doctor.
00:32:04.720 I'd never been.
00:32:05.760 Are you serious?
00:32:06.380 Yeah, and I didn't mean anything about it.
00:32:07.680 I know there's black doctors, but I just had never been to one, and I'm like, is this
00:32:12.480 going to, I just, I was like, and then I'm thinking black people, their whole life been
00:32:16.060 going to white doctors.
00:32:17.200 What do they think about that?
00:32:18.480 Well, you know, I mean, just growing up in, like, because, you know, this is, the South
00:32:22.300 is different than the rest of the country.
00:32:23.960 Like, there's black folks in pretty much every major city.
00:32:27.540 Yeah.
00:32:27.880 The difference in the South and the rest of the country is, you go an hour outside into 0.80
00:32:32.700 the country in the South, and there's still a bunch of black folks.
00:32:35.000 You go an hour outside of, like, Minneapolis, you know what I'm saying, or Milwaukee, and
00:32:40.920 there's really not any black folks, you know what I'm saying?
00:32:43.280 That's a good point.
00:32:43.840 So to speak.
00:32:44.400 And so I just, I think, like, Atlanta, especially, like, with Atlanta having spent, that's kind
00:32:49.940 of like my, that's my home major city, you know what I'm saying?
00:32:53.080 I lived in Atlanta for, that's where I live now, you know what I'm saying? 0.96
00:32:55.700 Oh, it's like February started a damn city over there, bro. 0.98
00:32:58.360 I mean, it's just, you know, and I always tell people, when I bump into, like, black folks 0.99
00:33:02.360 in Idaho or something that just have never been around a lot of other black folks, I say,
00:33:06.960 you need to go live in Atlanta for two years, you know what I'm saying, and go experience
00:33:10.120 a city that's a black city, not just in terms of, like, the metro population,
00:33:14.400 being a lot of black folks, but also the infrastructure, you know what I'm saying? 0.96
00:33:17.880 The mayor's black, you know what I'm saying? 0.92
00:33:19.840 The city council, you know, a lot of the policemen, the sheriff, you know what I'm saying? 0.53
00:33:24.460 It's just, it's that kind of city.
00:33:26.360 And I tell white people in those same areas that, you know, because you ever notice, like,
00:33:30.540 a lot of those, like, hate groups and stuff will be, like, in Idaho and, you know, the
00:33:34.280 militias and all that stuff. 0.64
00:33:35.460 And I'm like, there are no black, when have you ever been around black people to know you have 1.00
00:33:39.760 a problem with them? 0.98
00:33:40.480 You know what I'm saying?
00:33:41.180 Like, you know, but I tell, I tell, you know, white folks the same thing.
00:33:44.300 Go live in Atlanta for a couple years.
00:33:45.440 See what it's like to be, for that shoe to be on the other, the foot.
00:33:48.700 You know what I'm saying?
00:33:49.100 Other foot. 0.98
00:33:50.100 And you should experience that.
00:33:52.100 You know what I'm saying?
00:33:52.440 Because I think that, that just evolves your perspective to a point where you might be a
00:33:57.000 little more sympathetic and empathetic of somebody.
00:33:58.880 You know what I'm saying?
00:33:59.340 If you really just looked at the world the way they had been forced to see it, you know?
00:34:04.860 Yeah, it's interesting.
00:34:07.440 I just, I guess I was really just, yeah, I'm just thinking about, like, why, I guess,
00:34:13.460 why, I guess, maybe it's a lot of music.
00:34:15.700 I wonder what it was that made me relate when I was real young.
00:34:19.520 I was in this, you know.
00:34:21.860 It was hip-hop, man.
00:34:22.800 I'm going to tell you.
00:34:23.720 You know what I'm saying?
00:34:24.220 And that's what it was.
00:34:24.980 Hip-hop shaped a lot of hearts and changed a lot of potentially racist, you know, hearts.
00:34:32.140 Like, I would say, like, broke that cycle in families in the South, you know, of a lot of,
00:34:37.280 because I just knew people that would otherwise, I'd be like, man, that joke was racist.
00:34:43.040 But they just love Tupac so much, they just couldn't be, you know what I'm saying?
00:34:46.360 And that one thing, because they just love Tupac, hypothetically.
00:34:50.260 Right.
00:34:50.480 Like, so much, it just slowly changed their whole perspective on just black folks in general.
00:34:57.660 Well, yeah, you'd have, like, I always had this vision, you'd have a dude out in his yard 0.99
00:35:00.680 just yelling the N-word, but then he closed the door and he's in there fucking moonwalking. 0.98
00:35:04.120 Right. 0.99
00:35:05.080 That's the MTV generation, you know what I'm saying?
00:35:07.140 Maybe that is, bro.
00:35:07.980 Because you think about it, like, people that grew up in the, that's why these songwriters
00:35:11.620 here in Nashville, when they write, like, every genre is present, you know what I'm saying?
00:35:15.980 Man, they're bringing that tool bag of every genre because the MTV generation, and especially
00:35:20.940 now, the way streaming is, you know what I'm saying?
00:35:22.920 Because back in, you know, when you had to, like, seek out your music, you know what I'm
00:35:26.740 saying, you had to go to the record store and seek out your, whatever kind of music your
00:35:30.540 taste, you know, preferred, it was a little different, you know what I'm saying?
00:35:34.260 But then when MTV started playing everything, they'd have those blocks, I don't know if you
00:35:37.840 remember that, they'd have, like, the blocks where they have hip-hop block, a rock block,
00:35:42.900 a R&B block, you know what I'm saying, and, like, so if you're just sitting there watching
00:35:47.600 MTV, which during the summertime, you know, that's just what we did as kids, you were
00:35:51.620 going to see that NWA video, you were going to see that, you know, Will Smith summertime
00:35:57.320 video, and then you were going to see Nirvana, you know what I'm saying, and then you might
00:36:01.820 even see some Tim McGraw and some, you know, whatever, like, so this generation, that generation
00:36:06.800 and moving forward, everybody was just, everything was just that accessible, you know what I'm
00:36:12.460 saying, so everybody has been touched by every genre of music in some kind of way.
00:36:17.200 Yeah.
00:36:17.840 Yeah, and now you start to see, and this is interesting, too, you see a lot of black country
00:36:23.060 guys on TikTok, I see a lot of it, you know, it's kind of, it's getting kind of wild, dude,
00:36:28.440 like, I'll meet, like, everything is just a lot more mixed, I've always had this theory
00:36:32.320 that it's going to, like, in three generations, everybody's going to be beige, you know?
00:36:37.100 Well, I say that same thing, man, I said, we all started the same color, I believe, you
00:36:41.560 know, I mean, look, I wasn't there, I can't personally.
00:36:44.340 Well, what color is a zygote or whatever, like a baby when it's in that?
00:36:46.560 Well, I just think that in that part of the world, that particular part of the world where
00:36:50.160 the world was allegedly, based on what we've been told, born, you know, people look a certain
00:36:56.020 way.
00:36:56.360 And then I think, as we migrated to different areas, you know what I'm saying, like, our
00:37:00.840 ancestors migrated to this cold place up here, and then had to be in caves for six months
00:37:05.320 out of the year, and, you know what I'm saying, so over thousands of years of that reduced
00:37:09.760 exposure to the sun, the skin just got paler, so we'd split up, but then, now, in the last,
00:37:16.040 what, 100, 200 years, everybody's come back together, so yeah, it's just a matter of time
00:37:20.220 for, we go back to that same color, you know, which is like.
00:37:23.220 Yeah, you ain't even be able to find anybody to hate, man, at that point.
00:37:25.940 Yeah.
00:37:26.360 You're going to need a chart if you want to be racist, dude.
00:37:28.200 That's why, like, some places you can't even be racist.
00:37:31.060 People still going to hate themselves, though, Theo, because ultimately, that's what it boils
00:37:35.580 down to, you know what I'm saying?
00:37:36.540 That's a game for me, bro.
00:37:37.880 There ain't nobody out there.
00:37:38.960 The easiest person for me to hate is myself, bro.
00:37:41.040 Myself, and honestly, I can't hate anybody else unless I hate myself, and I can't love
00:37:46.160 anybody else unless I love myself, so, you know, that's just the way it is.
00:37:50.420 So what was, so when you're, you're, so you get, so get me to the point where you kind
00:37:55.560 of, your music really takes off, man.
00:37:56.820 Okay, so basically, I moved up to Athens, where Big Steve was at, and met Bobby Stamps,
00:38:02.840 who was my manager for 20 years, and he introduced me to a guy, he introduced me to Colt Ford,
00:38:09.060 and to a guy named Shannon Houchins, who owns a label, and him and Colt have a label here
00:38:13.240 in town called Average Joe's Entertainment in Nashville, and, but I started just, it was
00:38:20.800 a roundabout way, but I started just really finding myself in the studio, you know, because
00:38:26.320 I was, you know what I'm saying, the first time I ever went to a studio, I was working
00:38:31.320 as an electrician's apprentice, running conduit, bending pipe, and I saved up like $350 over
00:38:38.800 one summer, and the only other guy that I could find that was a rapper, you know what
00:38:43.840 I'm saying, that even, any inkling of like, wanting to be a rapper, oh, Rodney was his
00:38:48.620 name, he was, he was, he was a different kind of guy, you know what I'm saying, but,
00:38:51.720 And what you mean, autism or something?
00:38:53.540 No, he was just, he was just a different type of cat, I don't, I don't really know how
00:38:57.860 to put it, you know, he, he didn't come from like, he didn't, everybody played sports,
00:39:02.440 you know what I'm saying, that was like your biggest badge of honor you could have, and
00:39:06.000 he, he wasn't that kind of guy, he was, he was really like a, kind of like an Eminem
00:39:11.160 type, like when you hear Eminem talk about like the way he grew up, you know what I'm
00:39:14.120 saying, like, kind of like that kind of deal, you know, like in the trailer, like the little
00:39:17.840 small mobile home, you know what I'm saying, and, and.
00:39:20.960 They'd never seen it before like him, huh?
00:39:22.680 Yeah, well, I mean, I wouldn't say that it was even that rare, but it just wasn't, most
00:39:27.940 people, he was just kind of like the kind of person that was just.
00:39:32.220 Was he redheaded?
00:39:33.140 He was redheaded, yes he was.
00:39:34.640 Dude, and he liked black culture? 0.80
00:39:36.260 Yes.
00:39:36.700 Bruh, tell me this, bruh.
00:39:38.100 Tell me, you just blew my mind with that.
00:39:40.180 The first, dude, the first, the guy, the guy that was always wearing a North Carolina
00:39:46.100 jersey and hanging out with black people was always a redheaded dude, bruh. 0.63
00:39:52.880 Wow. 0.97
00:39:53.080 Don't even tell me it wasn't, bruh.
00:39:54.980 Man.
00:39:55.940 Every, I don't know how it worked out, bruh, I don't know how the sun hit him or whatever,
00:40:00.000 but.
00:40:00.280 But I kind of, I think our generation, at least where I was growing up, like we kind of were
00:40:04.100 the first generation to like just, we all kicked it, you know what I'm saying?
00:40:07.440 Because football was the most important thing.
00:40:10.160 Yeah, that'll keep people together.
00:40:11.100 You know, and like if you play football, like we, the only color that matters is Navy, you
00:40:15.620 know what I'm saying?
00:40:16.120 Yeah, yeah.
00:40:16.560 And so, you know, but, but, but as far as the story of finishing, we saved up and we
00:40:21.880 went to the studio, we get to the studio up in Atlanta, it was called Eight Ball Recording
00:40:26.700 Studios, I'll never forget.
00:40:28.260 So I had my $300, he had his $300, we got like a 12 hour block. 1.00
00:40:31.920 Oh, damn boy. 0.99
00:40:33.240 Now does that mean producers are in there with you? 1.00
00:40:34.900 No, no, no, no, no, no.
00:40:35.700 Listen, so then we get in there and he's like, all right, where's y'all's beats?
00:40:39.700 And we're like, huh?
00:40:41.120 Oh.
00:40:41.740 It hadn't even occurred to us that we were going to need beats.
00:40:44.760 And so basically, so we, you know, saved up all this money over a period of months.
00:40:49.800 Oh, I'm sure that's a lot of money at that point.
00:40:51.480 And he's kind of representing to me, like he's, man, I know what to do, I know what
00:40:54.700 to do, but we get there and we ain't got no beats and we don't know how to make no
00:40:57.760 beats, but the guy was actually cool enough to sit there and kind of like allow us to
00:41:01.580 like, he basically made some garbage beat, but you know, like held our hands there when
00:41:08.080 we felt like we were doing it or something.
00:41:09.880 And we recorded two songs.
00:41:10.960 And one was called Nothing But Game, Theo. 0.99
00:41:13.480 Oh, damn. 0.99
00:41:14.000 It ain't nothing but game coming out my mouth, player, player. 1.00
00:41:19.360 There was like, the rap was like, right quick, I'm bringing tight shit for these jealous 0.98
00:41:23.320 marks to jock bailing through the parking lot when my partner sparked the chop. 0.96
00:41:27.560 Now I'm feeling kind of strange, like my state of mind done changed.
00:41:30.840 Off that hurricane and dank, I'm starting to think that I'm deranged.
00:41:34.500 Dang, bro. 1.00
00:41:35.300 Tight shit, you know what I mean? 1.00
00:41:36.620 Yeah, that's how to make you feel good though, huh? 1.00
00:41:38.520 Oh man, it was terrible, man.
00:41:40.980 Like it really was.
00:41:41.760 But I was so proud.
00:41:43.120 Yeah.
00:41:43.660 I mean, I had something recorded on a cassette tape and we could ride around and listen to
00:41:48.380 it.
00:41:48.760 I can feel it right now.
00:41:50.440 Man, I'm telling you, bro. 0.97
00:41:51.080 Man, you're like, we fucking got something. 0.96
00:41:52.960 But the people, when I got to Athens. 0.99
00:41:54.320 Whoop that trick! 0.96
00:41:55.540 Oh, man, it was just that, it wasn't that good.
00:41:57.880 No one near that good.
00:41:59.040 It was that one, Oscar.
00:42:01.440 But basically, like, I just felt like, man, this is it.
00:42:06.380 Like, I felt like I had already made it, basically, you know what I'm saying?
00:42:09.300 Even though I'm still working three jobs and selling mid-grade weed, like, but I'm like,
00:42:13.080 dang, man, like, this is it.
00:42:14.780 You know what I'm saying?
00:42:15.420 Like, girls come around, yeah, I'm a rapper.
00:42:17.920 What do you mean?
00:42:18.560 Oh, I'll play you my song, you know what I'm saying?
00:42:21.040 You got a business card now.
00:42:22.600 Oh, man.
00:42:23.400 Don't let me, like, steal, like, a laminate from, like, a tour or something, like So So
00:42:27.600 Def, because Fat Shan, the producer that I ended up working with in Athens, and all
00:42:32.340 those guys, Bobby and Colt, were close to Jermaine Dupri.
00:42:34.840 They worked with Jermaine Dupri, and they had, like, all these stuff, jackets and stuff
00:42:38.240 that said So So Def on it.
00:42:39.900 So anytime I could, like, I would try to get that jacket for a night and go to this post-up
00:42:44.460 and be like, oh, this whole thing?
00:42:46.040 What do you mean?
00:42:46.600 And so just flexing, you know what I mean?
00:42:49.980 It's like feeling like I kind of, like, manifested certain things by, like, I would tell girls,
00:42:55.800 you know, the Dungeon family is a big, a very important, what's the word?
00:43:02.900 I mean, a musical family in Atlanta that consists of outcasts, goody mob.
00:43:06.280 Like a dynasty or something?
00:43:07.400 I mean, just the forefathers are the pillars of, in my view, of hip-hop in Atlanta, as far
00:43:15.360 as representing Atlanta for real, for real, you know, in an accurate way.
00:43:21.260 But I used to tell girls that I was the white member of the Dungeon family, like five years
00:43:29.240 before.
00:43:29.560 You were counting or whatever.
00:43:30.780 No, like, no, I was the white rapper.
00:43:32.720 Oh, okay.
00:43:33.040 Yeah, like, and, and, like, there was, it was said, and I think it probably was said by Rico
00:43:39.120 from Organized Noise, who was kind of the, the, the Dungeon was his mother's basement,
00:43:46.140 you know what I'm saying?
00:43:46.600 Okay, got it.
00:43:46.900 His mother's house, so he was kind of the patriarch, is that a good way to put it?
00:43:50.540 Yeah, the Airbnb owner.
00:43:51.900 Yeah, for sure.
00:43:53.340 And, and so I'd heard that he said white folks shouldn't be participating in hip-hop or something
00:43:58.260 like that, but I was always like, well, he gonna love me. 0.99
00:44:01.540 He gonna love me, because I'm, I'm, I'm for real, like, I'm real with my shit, you know 0.99
00:44:04.660 what I'm saying? 0.99
00:44:05.000 I'm, I'm representing who I am, you know, and some Georgia shit the right way. 0.96
00:44:08.160 He gonna love me, watch this, that's what I would tell, like, my friends, but I would 0.90
00:44:11.640 tell girls that, yeah, I'm, I'm in the Dungeon family, what do you mean?
00:44:14.420 Like, way before I could, it could have even been anything remotely, you know, resembling
00:44:19.500 reality, and I'd be damned if I didn't become a white boy in the Dungeon family.
00:44:24.400 Manifested it, almost.
00:44:25.500 Yeah, you know what I'm saying?
00:44:26.660 So that's, I guess that's what I get from fake it till you make it, you know what I mean?
00:44:31.120 And, and, you know, me and Rico, that's my brother, you know what I'm saying?
00:44:34.900 And the guy that allegedly has said that, I mean, he's, he's as close to anybody, to
00:44:40.220 me as anybody I've met in, in the music business, period.
00:44:43.060 So, man, it's just crazy how life can unfold, you know, if you, but I, but I had so much
00:44:48.400 faith back then, man.
00:44:49.680 Really?
00:44:50.300 So you had faith in, you mean in God, you mean?
00:44:52.780 I mean, in God, but in, but in God's plan for me, um, just in that God had a plan for
00:44:58.400 me, you know what I'm saying?
00:44:59.720 To, to do something that was going to impact the world and that, you know, that I, I just
00:45:04.480 always felt like I had a spirit, man, that, that, you know, I, I want to be an extension
00:45:10.400 of whatever that, that ultimate love, you know, love based energy or spirit that God
00:45:16.340 is.
00:45:17.020 Yeah.
00:45:17.520 You know what I'm saying?
00:45:17.900 I always just felt like an extension of that because, you know, I like to, to be a purveyor
00:45:23.280 of, of love and light, so to speak, you know, so, and I just felt like there was some plan
00:45:28.420 where I was going to like, just have an impact on the world in some kind of way, you know,
00:45:32.820 based on that.
00:45:34.220 And, um, you know, in some ways it's worked out exactly how I could have drawn it up and
00:45:40.220 in some ways not, you know what I'm saying?
00:45:41.960 But it's been a hell of a journey, you know what I'm saying?
00:45:44.620 And I still do not for one second question God's, you know, like involvement in the whole
00:45:51.200 thing.
00:45:51.880 That's just me, you know what I'm saying?
00:45:52.980 And people can, are welcome to believe anything they want, you know, in all of our experiences
00:45:57.720 and our, our, uh, upbringing, you know, and in our experiences as, as adults, everything
00:46:03.040 shapes us, you know what I'm saying?
00:46:04.260 Our DNA, you know, is a part of that too, but I just, um, I just believe what I, what
00:46:10.160 I believe and I, it's something that I, that I feel and it can't be quantified in words
00:46:14.600 or, you know, it's just beyond us.
00:46:16.660 But I know when I'm being creative, Theo, like when I'm writing, when I really get in that
00:46:22.480 zone, I, there's nothing I can ever do to feel closer to God or, you know, to, to just
00:46:29.140 that, that energy source, that love, you know what I'm saying?
00:46:31.760 Like, I just feel it.
00:46:32.720 It's like, I'm in such harmony in a way time can just disappear.
00:46:36.260 It's like, I'm doing what I was put here to do, you know what I'm saying?
00:46:40.580 And, and whatever, whoever created me is pleased at this time, you know what I'm saying?
00:46:47.220 And then it's like, I feel some, uh, like internal, um, turmoil at times too.
00:46:53.600 And it's like, I'm not, I'm not, uh, doing what I was put here to do.
00:46:57.660 And, and, uh, that, that spirit's not pleased and I can feel that too.
00:47:02.400 Not abandoned though, you know, just right.
00:47:05.960 Do you, um, where were we at with it, man?
00:47:08.720 I got a terrible, terrible, like, um, this is like the third podcast I've done and, uh,
00:47:15.320 landing things, you know what I'm saying?
00:47:17.260 It's like, I, I love talking about every aspect of my story, but I'm definitely trying to work 0.98
00:47:22.500 on landing shit.
00:47:24.000 I think you've done a nice job. 0.98
00:47:25.060 There's a couple of times we were like, well, let's finish this point before we go on to
00:47:27.680 something else.
00:47:28.660 Because I, I, I sometimes kind of forget what's, I don't forget what's going on, but it's hard
00:47:33.080 for me to like, uh, remember and be thinking at the same time. 0.99
00:47:36.520 No shit. 0.99
00:47:37.240 Um, well put. 0.99
00:47:38.920 So, but to go back to the, so at the studio, you know what I'm saying?
00:47:42.580 So we get that, that song.
00:47:44.900 Right. 1.00
00:47:45.120 You and my fucking boy are in there. 1.00
00:47:46.680 Yeah. 1.00
00:47:47.020 Yeah.
00:47:47.140 And he was, cause look, dude, I'm telling you this the first time they had a white dude that 0.63
00:47:50.380 wanted to be black in our area, bro. 0.51
00:47:52.020 They never seen it before.
00:47:53.360 They put him in special ed, bro.
00:47:55.800 Wow.
00:47:56.880 You hear that, man?
00:47:58.600 That's crazy. 1.00
00:47:59.700 They put him in special fucking ed, bro. 1.00
00:48:01.980 Shout out Brian Purvis, dog. 1.00
00:48:04.100 Praise God, bro.
00:48:05.060 BP, what?
00:48:06.080 Oh, he's still, he just got locked up for something.
00:48:09.040 Bring him up.
00:48:09.780 Bless that, but free that man.
00:48:11.020 Free BP.
00:48:11.660 I don't know, bro.
00:48:12.960 Y'all don't know, bro.
00:48:13.900 I don't know what he did.
00:48:14.120 Yeah, I don't know what he did.
00:48:15.160 I don't know what he did.
00:48:16.160 That's true. 0.98
00:48:16.680 I had social studies with him and he fucking, he was, uh. 0.94
00:48:18.920 But he done been on a hell of a journey, though. 0.97
00:48:20.620 Oh, this dude, he been through it all, man.
00:48:22.540 He took those bullets, you know what I'm saying?
00:48:24.300 Yeah, he really, something happened to him, yeah.
00:48:27.200 P, you, yeah, there you go.
00:48:28.980 Bring him up.
00:48:29.740 Gang, baby, right there.
00:48:30.800 Oh, BP, man.
00:48:31.020 What BP do?
00:48:32.040 What he do?
00:48:32.980 Attempted murder.
00:48:34.140 Oh, okay.
00:48:34.380 That's hypothetical.
00:48:35.880 Yeah.
00:48:37.020 Attempted.
00:48:37.800 You know.
00:48:38.200 Oh, we ain't paying the $4 to find out.
00:48:40.180 That's it, B.
00:48:40.800 Happy Hanukkah.
00:48:41.620 Yeah, that's all we got for you, bro.
00:48:43.740 But, uh.
00:48:44.360 Stay well, baby.
00:48:45.360 Yeah, man.
00:48:46.040 But they put him in there, dog.
00:48:47.440 You can't be good.
00:48:48.100 Be good at it.
00:48:49.060 They put him in there, man. 1.00
00:48:50.840 Damn. 1.00
00:48:51.240 Yeah. 0.99
00:48:52.160 But you knew him pretty well, y'all.
00:48:53.580 Was y'all cool?
00:48:54.680 We were cool for a while.
00:48:55.800 He was hard to really get close to, man.
00:48:57.760 He just had that rattle in him.
00:48:59.060 He was out of the room, wasn't he? 1.00
00:48:59.560 He had that fucking rattle in him, bro. 1.00
00:49:01.380 You could tell he never slept. 1.00
00:49:03.180 Damn. 1.00
00:49:03.620 He probably, he didn't slept. 1.00
00:49:04.540 No drugs.
00:49:05.240 No drugs, bro. 1.00
00:49:06.140 He had drugs built into his fucking neck. 1.00
00:49:08.040 I think we know that now as mental illness. 1.00
00:49:10.460 You know what I'm saying?
00:49:11.140 Oh, yeah. 0.98
00:49:11.740 But back then, it was just damn, all right. 0.99
00:49:13.560 He was just, he looked like he fucking was early and late at the same time, bro. 1.00
00:49:19.620 Damn. 1.00
00:49:20.720 He would just, you know, his eyes never shut. 1.00
00:49:23.280 He looked like he didn't sleep, man.
00:49:24.680 He maybe slept twice.
00:49:25.180 Who knows what he went through, man?
00:49:26.340 Who knows what his whole life was like that made it where he just, where he stayed that
00:49:30.420 wired.
00:49:31.060 You know what I'm saying?
00:49:31.480 I always, this is something I think about now, and I'm sure you got some insight and
00:49:36.460 a perspective on this, too.
00:49:37.620 What if we went back through history, Theo, and looked at every violent crime, every murder,
00:49:43.940 every, even rape, that's ever been committed in the history of planet Earth, going back?
00:49:50.360 I wonder what percentage of those violent crimes were committed by people that had, they had,
00:49:55.740 you know, a thorough psychiatric evaluation, or mentally, it was a mental illness.
00:50:01.420 You know what I'm saying?
00:50:02.060 It was something that, you know, at the time, just, obviously, there was no, there was
00:50:08.780 nothing, when did mental illness, mental health even become a thing, like, last 50 years?
00:50:14.360 Yeah.
00:50:15.200 And it's even been like a, like a slow and, you know, jagged, like, ascent to where we
00:50:21.820 are now, which, but, but I'm just, I thought about that.
00:50:25.180 Like, if we, you know, there's, there's just something to be said for that, though, that,
00:50:28.780 like, hurt people, hurt people, you know?
00:50:30.760 Oh, 100%, man.
00:50:32.060 Well, they just had a guy on Joe Rogan, this guy, Gabber Mate, Gabber Mate, and he is like,
00:50:38.640 I want to say he's a psychiatrist, but he's like a really good thinker.
00:50:43.720 Some people are real good at thinking.
00:50:45.980 And he talks a lot about trauma, and trauma is kind of a buzzword that people use a lot
00:50:50.260 now.
00:50:51.260 But one thing that, that he was saying.
00:50:54.100 Yeah.
00:50:55.260 Yeah, yeah.
00:50:56.000 That really resonates with me.
00:50:56.860 Yeah, yeah, that really resonates, bro. 0.99
00:50:59.720 Yeah, that fucking resonates, bro. 0.99
00:51:01.660 Raisinets, bro. 1.00
00:51:02.640 Yeah.
00:51:02.880 So close.
00:51:04.320 Raisinates. 1.00
00:51:06.820 But he was saying how, like, that, like, pain and stuff can be transferred through DNA.
00:51:14.840 And maybe some of that's believable or not, but it can definitely be transferred through
00:51:18.740 the way that you treat people and the new things that have, like, the way that you, it's
00:51:23.460 so crazy how many times something happens to somebody when they're a child, and then the
00:51:27.360 same, they do the exact same thing.
00:51:29.480 No.
00:51:29.900 They do the exact same thing.
00:51:32.180 And it's interesting, man.
00:51:33.280 It is.
00:51:33.740 And it's just a lot of, like, we're just now getting to the point, too, where we have
00:51:38.180 so much reflection of ourselves because of-
00:51:41.300 That's a good and bad thing.
00:51:43.100 Right.
00:51:43.300 It's a good and bad thing.
00:51:44.440 But it's like we have such a recording of how people operate and behave now that you're
00:51:48.660 able to see a lot of, like, okay, and compare it, you know?
00:51:51.460 Right.
00:51:53.000 And just document it.
00:51:54.520 So I think it's like we're getting to a point where it's like we're really documenting how 0.98
00:51:58.480 much pain has been, like, just in the damn gene pool of humanity. 0.99
00:52:05.600 That's crazy, man. 0.98
00:52:06.680 And it makes you wonder kind of what the future will be like.
00:52:08.800 Will we be able to solve that kind of thing?
00:52:11.820 Or we will just be able to continue to just-
00:52:14.200 Because I don't think- We are more aware of, like, of just, you know, mental illnesses,
00:52:19.640 and- But I don't necessarily think that we've really figured out the best ways to treat them.
00:52:24.840 Yeah.
00:52:25.400 You know what I'm saying?
00:52:26.240 To give somebody, you know, because it's like, you know, I've been on meds before, you
00:52:32.880 know, at different times.
00:52:34.000 And it's like, okay, I don't feel that way anymore, but now I feel this way, which is equally
00:52:39.800 terrible or it affects, you know, some other aspect of my being that just makes it either
00:52:45.880 worse for me, ultimately, or at best, like, just a trade-off, you know what I'm saying?
00:52:50.400 So, you know, I just- Treating everything with chemical, with man-made medicine, you
00:52:57.340 know what I'm saying?
00:52:57.440 Right, it might not be the way.
00:52:58.560 Yeah, it might not be, you know what I'm saying?
00:52:59.680 And we might look in- In 30 years, we might look back and be like, okay, we took a real
00:53:03.600 bad turn as a society with trying that.
00:53:05.460 Like back in the late 1800s when they were, like, drilling, you know, screws in people's-
00:53:10.700 You know, at your temples, and they would, like, just kill that frontal lobe.
00:53:14.580 That's how it would make people, like, chill out. 0.90
00:53:17.200 Yeah, think about that's crazy.
00:53:18.200 That was 125 years ago.
00:53:19.720 And then you had to pay for that dude to come over.
00:53:21.580 Yeah, and your family's there, like, how did that work?
00:53:24.100 Yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:53:25.020 Literally, you're just like-
00:53:26.840 Yeah, dude.
00:53:28.200 Man, that's crazy. 1.00
00:53:32.020 Damn, you got birds laying on a little nail on your head. 1.00
00:53:35.220 Man, it's insane, dude. 1.00
00:53:36.560 Your cousin come and hang his hat on that little fucking spike. 1.00
00:53:39.360 Literally, you're just like- 1.00
00:53:41.400 Yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:53:42.340 For, like, 60 years, like, it's crazy, man.
00:53:45.960 Like, who came up with that?
00:53:48.240 Like, they should have done-
00:53:49.720 I hope that that was what that person, at some point in their life, I hope whoever thought
00:53:54.000 of that first and started doing that, I hope they had to experience it.
00:53:58.120 Man, that's crazy.
00:53:59.780 And they were also saying on that episode just about how people take care of their children
00:54:03.940 and stuff like that, like, just that there's not enough connection between families and
00:54:09.820 stuff these days.
00:54:10.720 People used to be in tribes.
00:54:12.120 A lot of that has been talked about in the past 10 years, about how people used to be in
00:54:15.660 tribes and we were closer.
00:54:17.480 So not only did your mother see you, but your aunt saw you.
00:54:20.140 Your grandmother was right there.
00:54:21.320 There was constant, like, attention and evaluation of what was going on with you and that they
00:54:28.460 think people developed healthier then.
00:54:30.820 I don't know if that's true, but it's just like a- it was a theory that that man was talking
00:54:34.620 about.
00:54:35.440 You know, I just- I think that this- the gap between human beings, period, is just getting
00:54:40.700 wider and wider.
00:54:41.520 That is weird.
00:54:42.120 You know what I mean?
00:54:42.720 And we were talking about it last night, like, social media, you know, it's designed to bring
00:54:47.320 us all closer together, but ultimately, it creates such polarized, you know, like, views
00:54:52.500 of things, you know what I'm saying?
00:54:53.980 Like, social media is probably as much to blame as anything for the way our country has- it's
00:55:04.060 always been these two drastically different choices that we had when it came to political
00:55:09.280 stuff, you know what I'm saying? 0.99
00:55:10.380 And I just won't say, for the record, fuck both of them, but it's like- because that's 0.99
00:55:16.820 just not- that just doesn't make good sense to me. 0.99
00:55:18.980 Like, our two choices are these two radically different, like, viewpoints, and it's just
00:55:24.880 crazy, but, like, social media has driven that wedge.
00:55:29.180 It just made it that much wider, that gap, you know what I'm saying?
00:55:31.720 Yeah, it definitely led to a lot more-
00:55:33.280 Because people don't seek information, they seek affirmation, you know what I'm saying?
00:55:36.100 So, they follow things that they know are going to continue to feed them the same thing
00:55:41.160 they've been on, you know what I'm saying?
00:55:42.560 And sometimes, I think each side is right, you know, at different times.
00:55:45.720 I think the sensible compromise of the middle is kind of- it just makes a little too much
00:55:50.480 sense to me, you know what I'm saying?
00:55:51.760 Like, sometimes, you know, this way of thinking is going to be the best way to go about it,
00:55:55.980 and then sometimes this way, I think, is going to be the best way to go about it, but, you
00:56:00.300 know, you'll have, like, these 280 character or less, like, you know, just- what do you
00:56:06.780 call it?
00:56:07.120 Hot takes, basically, like, of just saying something or reporting a certain event in a
00:56:12.320 certain way that's going to reaffirm to that group of people that, yep, see?
00:56:16.880 I was right.
00:56:17.600 You know what I'm saying?
00:56:18.300 Yep, that's it.
00:56:18.980 Exactly, and so- and then they- it's like the old adage, a lion will travel around the
00:56:26.920 world before the truth has a chance to put its pants on or whatever.
00:56:29.920 I would have butchered it, but, yeah, something like that.
00:56:31.900 But I understand it, yeah.
00:56:32.980 Yeah, people share stuff, you know what I'm saying?
00:56:34.780 The next thing you know, it's just- it spreads so- like, wildfire.
00:56:37.260 We used to play that game, the telephone game.
00:56:38.980 Remember when you was a kid?
00:56:39.820 We'd have played a telephone game.
00:56:41.060 Oh, yeah, like, sit there and whisper and tell this person, this person.
00:56:44.120 And then by the time it got to the end, it was-
00:56:45.860 Somebody lied.
00:56:46.560 Oh, we had one kid, bro. 0.99
00:56:47.940 This is kind of fucked up, but he would just yell the- when it came back to him, he would 0.99
00:56:51.980 just say it was the N-word every time, bro. 1.00
00:56:55.240 This motherfucker, yeah, he was just- I don't even think he was- I think he was just mentally 1.00
00:56:59.300 unwell, you know, but- 1.00
00:57:00.440 Yeah, man.
00:57:00.820 Because it would be like, you know- 0.99
00:57:01.900 He thought that shit was funny. 1.00
00:57:03.280 Oh, no, something's wrong with him. 1.00
00:57:05.060 Oh, okay.
00:57:05.260 But he- it would be like hurricane, and it would break around, and every time, and the teacher 0.99
00:57:09.640 would fucking- 0.98
00:57:10.200 But he just knew that word, man. 0.99
00:57:11.720 He knew it, like, got a reaction probably.
00:57:13.680 Yeah, I think he might have had-
00:57:14.700 He didn't understand it, but like-
00:57:16.120 He might- he also talked about, like, Egypt and the pharaohs a lot. 0.95
00:57:19.120 He might have had a mental disability. 0.98
00:57:22.220 Right.
00:57:22.780 But- so take me through, so you- so the music is popping, things get going.
00:57:27.380 I apologize. 0.99
00:57:28.320 I like to talk about a variety of shit. 0.99
00:57:30.520 No, this is great, bro. 0.99
00:57:31.420 This is what it is.
00:57:32.300 This is the conversation.
00:57:33.280 I don't want to de-emphasize, you know, the fact that I've had an incredible journey,
00:57:37.480 you know, through music, but- so yeah, so then I'm in Athens at that point.
00:57:41.780 I'm starting to make some connections, and we ended up putting out my first album, my first
00:57:46.680 major release on Beat Club, Timberland's record label, the first single, Ugly, was on this
00:57:51.620 album.
00:57:51.880 You know, we put out an independent version of that album by the same name about two years
00:58:00.280 before the major label version came out.
00:58:02.240 So that's what people started hearing on the ground.
00:58:03.900 Yeah, so it started spreading around Georgia, and it was like, people always talk about marketing
00:58:07.860 plans, you know what I'm saying? 0.99
00:58:09.120 And like, we got to come up with the perfect, you know, when something's the shit shit, it's 0.99
00:58:14.360 just word of mouth is the marketing plan, and it was that kind of deal, you know, and 0.99
00:58:18.300 I'm just blessed to have been a part of it, and to, you know, to have had that clarity
00:58:22.800 at that particular point in time to be able to do something that people fuck with to that 0.83
00:58:26.600 degree, but literally, like, one person, two people, two people, four people, four people, 0.82
00:58:31.660 eight people, and so on, and so on, and so on, and yeah, so pretty soon, and there was
00:58:36.160 a lot of other, like, you know, interesting details, tidbits of information to the story,
00:58:43.560 but short story long, basically, we signed with Interscope Records.
00:58:48.300 You know, Jimmy Iovine, the same, after, in 1999, when I first saw Hi, My Name Is, I
00:58:55.040 was destroyed.
00:58:57.420 Why?
00:58:57.760 Because you thought he beat you to the punch?
00:58:58.980 I thought, at that time, as a white rapper, you pretty much felt like, ain't gonna be one
00:59:03.580 more.
00:59:04.660 Like, if they ever, if one ever gets back in the door, it's just gonna be one, and then
00:59:10.180 it was like, I saw that, and I was like, well, he did it perfect, you know what I'm saying?
00:59:16.740 Yeah, and I remember my best friend, Big Steve, and I was just all depressed, and he 0.98
00:59:20.480 came, and he was like, man, I think you got it fucked up, man. 0.99
00:59:24.460 He's like, yeah, he, that's some awesome shit. 1.00
00:59:26.580 He said, but you Southern, you, it's different, you know what I'm saying? 0.99
00:59:30.560 Like, you, you still straight, you know what I'm saying? 0.89
00:59:32.840 You still got your lane.
00:59:34.780 I was like, keep it coming, keep it coming, all right, you know what I'm saying?
00:59:37.900 And then, I got back up, you know, eventually, and got back to work, and two years later,
00:59:42.720 I was signed to the same label as him and him, yeah.
00:59:46.300 Did you ever get to meet him?
00:59:47.820 Yeah, yeah, I did.
00:59:49.620 I met him at the Anger Management Tour in 2003, it was a crazy experience.
00:59:54.760 I thought you were gonna say Anger Management Meetings, that's what I thought you were gonna
00:59:57.060 say, too.
00:59:57.520 Oh, no, no, no.
00:59:58.040 I've been to some of them.
00:59:58.900 You know, he was, I don't know, he was, he was a little, he was on the private plane
01:00:05.300 like level, you know what I'm saying, when I was, when I was still flying commercial,
01:00:09.240 you know, or I'm still flying commercial, but I was definitely, you know, up there in
01:00:12.760 first class and all that, but, you know, he, he jumped very quickly to private plane level,
01:00:17.360 you know what I'm saying, where he was just moving at his own pace, but, but we met, man,
01:00:22.220 and he, he was, he was very complimentary, you know what I'm saying, it was probably the
01:00:26.500 only time I've ever been starstruck in my life, when I, when I met Eminem, it was just
01:00:30.340 like, wow, that's really, that's the real Eminem right there, you know what I'm saying,
01:00:34.180 that's crazy, and, but man, he was extremely complimentary, you know, of me, and he always
01:00:39.680 has been, even when there was a diss song where he dissed me and Paul, Paul Wall, that
01:00:46.140 leaked, and even in the diss, he was, I, I feel like he was complimentary of me, you know
01:00:52.980 what I'm saying, like, he was, and he was actually, I don't know where the
01:00:56.420 information that he, but it was, it was wrong, the wrong drug, he said I was on,
01:01:00.980 or whatever, you know what I'm saying, oh yeah, I hate that when people get your drugs
01:01:03.600 wrong, yeah, man, it's like, come on, man, like, let he who is without sin catch the
01:01:07.820 first stone, you know, but, it is what it is, you know, Paul Rosenberg, his manager
01:01:12.920 was always super cool to me, and the whole Shady Records staff, I never had a chance to
01:01:19.580 get close to Eminem like that, as far as building like a super, you know, close personal
01:01:24.240 relationship, but, man, he would ask people about me, you know what I'm saying, anytime 0.67
01:01:29.980 he would see somebody that, like, he knew fucked with me, he would be like, how's Bubba doing, 0.68
01:01:36.240 you know what I'm saying, like, a couple times, so, you know, I got a number of respect for 0.71
01:01:40.820 him, man, love and respect, and so, but to go on back, so I was signed to Interscope Records
01:01:47.000 for about nine months, and after having so much success, Jimmy Iovine, shout out to Jimmy
01:01:53.100 Iovine, just an absolute iconic figure in music and entertainment, period, and that man believed
01:02:01.440 in me a great deal, I still don't even necessarily understand, you know, what it was about me that
01:02:08.160 made him believe in me so much, but he did, you know what I'm saying, and he's a genius, you know,
01:02:15.220 type of human being, so that always gave me confidence, just to know that, like, man, the 0.98
01:02:21.440 baddest motherfucker in this whole business, like, saw something in me, yeah, like, he believes in me 0.98
01:02:25.820 to the point where he's gonna push the maximum, the biggest button that Interscope Records, the 0.99
01:02:30.140 number one label in music, you know, could push, you know what I'm saying, six million dollars
01:02:34.520 spent on me in marketing, people know the name Bubba Sparks, you know what I'm saying, and
01:02:38.680 so, but he, after the Eminem and Dre success, he kind of was like, I might be on to something
01:02:44.320 with this whole, you know, the black producer, white boy, give him credibility, you know, 0.51
01:02:48.800 off top, and so, he tried a couple other routes, you know what I'm saying, as far as hooking
01:02:53.940 me up with people, and there was, the chemistry just wasn't there, and then, and then finally
01:02:59.740 he asked me one night, he called me, and he was like, I'm about to meet with Timberland,
01:03:03.420 and he's like, what do you think about that, I was like, oh, that'd be perfect, dude, I
01:03:06.600 was like, that'd be, that's it, you know what I'm saying, that's it, next morning, I was
01:03:10.500 on a flight out to LA, and the rest was history, and I was the first artist released that Timberland,
01:03:16.880 as far as it being his record label, and him releasing the artist, I was the first, yeah,
01:03:21.960 you was the first one, I was the first artist he ever released, the first one, yeah, overall,
01:03:26.220 right, yes, yeah, and so, what was your personal life like at that point, because life gets 0.97
01:03:30.960 crazy, bro, when you start getting where, I was a young country motherfucker with millions 0.97
01:03:36.740 of dollars, and pretty much whatever you could, in a budding, a spawning drug addict, and you 0.98
01:03:45.480 know what I'm saying, and just a kid, man, that just, you know, I just loved life at that
01:03:52.760 time, though, you know what I'm saying, we were just, were you happy, were you stoked,
01:03:55.720 at that time, man, on that first album, you damn right I was, yeah, you know, I was really
01:04:01.180 happy, man, I was going to London, and just, man, everything was so, like, you know, performing 0.56
01:04:06.320 on Saturday Night Live, man, you know what I'm saying, Derek Jeter's the host, you know
01:04:09.960 what I'm saying, me and Shakira are the musical guests, you know, and I'm in the green room
01:04:15.100 before, I perform on Saturday Night Live, and they knock on the doors about 15 minutes
01:04:20.560 before I go on, they're like, Mr. Sparks, there are two guests here that would just like to
01:04:24.540 say hello, if you, if you, if they're interrupting you or disturbing you, it's fine, they can come
01:04:29.440 back later, but if they could just say hello, it's Chris Rock and Jamie Foxx, you know what 0.99
01:04:34.040 I'm saying, so, I'm just kicking it, like, you know, and I'm just like, cut your ass boy, 0.97
01:04:38.720 you know what I'm saying, like, I'm just like, what's up, man, you know what I'm saying, 0.99
01:04:41.620 I don't know, no other way to be, you know what I'm saying, and like I said, I didn't
01:04:45.500 have a reference point of another example of, of somebody like me, you know, to show
01:04:51.440 me how to act a different way other than just being me, like, I just, and it's like,
01:04:55.580 sometimes it's just because I, for lack of a, uh, understanding of any other way I could 0.92
01:05:02.000 possibly act or be, I would just, fuck it, I'm just gonna be me again, I'm gonna keep 1.00
01:05:05.880 being me and keep being me, sometimes it served me well, sometimes it, it, it was fucked 1.00
01:05:10.000 up, but. Well, there's a lot of parts inside of you, obviously. No doubt, no doubt. So 0.99
01:05:16.140 those are, so that's really the highs, man. Yeah, that was great. Did y'all perform on
01:05:19.380 VMAs and stuff like that? I never performed on the VMAs, I, um, like, um, I went to several
01:05:26.080 VMAs, like. Did you go to the one with NSYNC at it, when Eminem came out with all the
01:05:30.560 different little, uh. No, no, that was, that, I came to, into the game the year after that
01:05:34.620 one. Dang. I tell you, when I came into the game, I was sitting right here at my first
01:05:38.420 VMAs, when Alicia Keys was at the VMAs playing Fallen. Beautiful. Falling on the, uh, on the
01:05:44.960 piano, and I remember just being like. I can't help falling. Is that one? Yeah. Oh. With
01:05:53.560 you. Oh, man. Dude, I was just like, I'm here, I'm in this bitch. Yeah. Dude, I remember 0.99
01:05:59.500 I sat, it was right after Chris Farley had died, I sat behind his brothers, and I sat
01:06:04.420 by Tim. God bless the dead man, Chris Farley, that was like, yeah. I sat by Shawshank Redemption,
01:06:09.340 the guy, the prisoner. And, uh. Which one, which prison, like, Tim Robbins? Tim Robbins,
01:06:14.400 yeah. What was his name in the movie? Christopher. No, that's Christopher Robbins I'm thinking
01:06:19.880 of. I don't know, bro. Anyway. That was a great movie, though. That was crazy, and I
01:06:24.000 fell asleep when NSYNC was performing, bro. I fucking fell asleep in my seat, bro. But Nelly 0.99
01:06:28.740 came by, and he fucking dabbed me up when he came by. That was pretty cool. You fell asleep. 0.97
01:06:32.020 So that was a highlight then. That's true. That's the craziest, bro. That's hard. Afterwards,
01:06:35.760 I got invited to a threesome with these ladies, and one of them gave me some cocaine, and I 1.00
01:06:40.860 got all fucking scared because I'd never done any cocaine. Is that the story you told on,
01:06:43.980 uh, on, uh, it was Joe Rogan or something? I watched where you were talking about, like,
01:06:48.360 the time you were, like, in New York. Now, you were supposed to do something the next morning.
01:06:51.540 Oh, that was with Daryl Strawberry. Yes, you were interviewing Daryl Strawberry. Man, that
01:06:56.200 was a tough night, man. That sucks, man. Well, just the- I know that feeling. The fun part 0.99
01:07:00.220 is fun, but the unfun part ain't fun, man. That inside-out feeling and just knowing that
01:07:04.240 you're functioning at about 36%. Oh, I get so much anxiety. But I was at this threesome,
01:07:10.240 but I wanted to remember it. So they had a bag of little sex toys in there. So I copped 0.92
01:07:15.600 one of them on the way out, right? I snuck one, and I put it in, like, my belt kind of,
01:07:20.740 you know? So then I was in New York City. I went to, like, a little key bodega to get
01:07:25.960 some snack or something, a little coconut water. They had just come out with coconut
01:07:30.260 water, and I tried it. And a little- I think I got a little thing of donuts or something.
01:07:36.580 But while I was in there, that little sex toy thing fell out on the floor in there, bro. 0.68
01:07:42.080 And, dude, it was like a migrant family, you know? There's no getting the shit back up in the 1.00
01:07:45.740 bull now. Oh, bro. It was a Vietnamese family owned it or something, you know? And they had 0.99
01:07:50.860 a little kid in there, bro, and he fucking brought it over to me. He didn't know what 0.99
01:07:55.320 it was, man. He just thought it was a toy. Oh, and I just- It was a toy, but- It was.
01:07:59.900 It just broke my- The whole shit was just bad. But anyway, man, so when- So you and I talked 0.97
01:08:07.440 about, like, when did you start to realize that you feel like you had, like, some addiction
01:08:11.720 issues? I was- Well, you know, I pretty much just kind of, like, partied, you know what I'm
01:08:16.600 saying? It's like, then I was in a snowmobile accident, ice fishing in Canada. It was, like,
01:08:22.020 you know, real fucked up. And I got prescribed, like, I mean, I had dabbled with, like, you 0.97
01:08:27.880 know, popping a Lortab or something, you know, not to mention specific drugs, but you know
01:08:32.180 what I'm saying? No, it's fine, man. I took some somas one time, and I drove into a driveway,
01:08:37.240 and there wasn't a driveway. Hey, them somas ain't no joke, boy. Flex for real and soma.
01:08:41.280 Dude. And my buddy, this gay fella, R.I.P., Billy Conforto, he was, like, one of the first
01:08:47.000 gay prize fighters in America. What is this? This is Celsius something. 1.00
01:08:51.780 Gotcha. See what the thing hitting on. And I thought, I don't know if he tried to take
01:08:58.600 advantage of me or what, but whatever. Anyway, bro, but what, yeah, so when do you start to
01:09:03.320 know that you had an issue? I was on tour with Blink-182. Shout out to what Trav, Trav Parker.
01:09:11.940 And I had been prescribed Percocets for about six months, and then they just cut them cold
01:09:19.640 turkey. You know, I knew nothing about addiction or, you know, or physical dependence or withdrawals,
01:09:26.760 dope scene. I knew nothing about shit. Then shit about shit. I knew shit about shit. And I 0.99
01:09:34.520 had run out, and I just think I'm just done with that. You know what I'm saying? And I remember
01:09:38.680 I had this process, you know what I'm saying? I would, the bus would get into wherever we
01:09:45.280 were going, like, that morning, and I would go in the hotel, and I would sleep till, like,
01:09:49.380 three o'clock. I would get up slowly, you know what I'm saying? I'd take a shower and
01:09:53.900 stuff. And then before I would leave the hotel at, like, five o'clock, I would take, like,
01:10:00.620 I think I would take two pills and then, like, four shots of Patron. And that would get me,
01:10:07.360 like, in the go be me in public and, you know, start angling towards showtime, you know?
01:10:13.300 And I remember I didn't, obviously didn't have the pills, and I laid down, trying to
01:10:18.240 go to sleep like normal. 30 minutes later, I wake up sweating, just, like, feeling inside
01:10:23.380 out. I'm like, oh, shit, I'm sick. This is crazy. Like, I think I'm just sick, like, cold 0.99
01:10:28.220 or flu or something. And I'm like, oh, man. And I try to lay back down. I maybe take some
01:10:34.780 cold medicine, lay back down, can't sleep. And I'm like, man, what is wrong? It's a unique
01:10:40.040 feeling. This is like a, I've never felt this exact type of thing before. And then
01:10:45.540 it hit me. Damn, it's because I ain't got no pills. It's like, damn, am I addicted to 0.99
01:10:51.480 these things? Like, what? And I remember I talked to somebody, like, probably my manager 0.99
01:10:56.360 or somebody, and was like, you think I'm addicted to them? He's like, I don't know. Maybe
01:11:01.540 so, you know? He's like, were you taking more of them than you were supposed to? And I was
01:11:05.200 like, yeah. I mean, of course. But I was just like, you know, I don't, I don't know. I
01:11:13.260 just, it was just a foreign concept to me. You know, it's just, that was definitely one
01:11:17.400 of those things. Like, I had known some, some addicts, you know what I'm saying? Some
01:11:22.480 drunks, a lot of drunks, you know what I'm saying? 1.00
01:11:24.760 That's all they used to call them, really? 0.67
01:11:26.100 Yeah, right. And, but for me, I just never, nobody ever thinks it's going to, it could
01:11:31.800 happen to them until it does. But I just remember being like, damn, I'm addicted to 0.97
01:11:35.620 these motherfuckers. But I was moving so fast, I said, you know, when I get to a 1.00
01:11:40.100 stopping point, you know, a resting, like, area, I'll take care of it and get on off
01:11:46.480 of them. But for now, I just need to buy them on the street, you know what I'm saying?
01:11:50.260 So I started buying them on the street, real heavy. My boy Trey, Chunky Trey, shout
01:11:54.460 out to Chunky Trey. He's like seven years sober now or some shit. 0.98
01:11:57.060 Gang, gang. 0.99
01:11:57.680 Big Steve's 15 years sober. I'm the only dipshit that just hadn't been able to, you 0.99
01:12:03.780 know, find that willingness or whatever, like to, you know, I'm a thinker, you know 0.98
01:12:08.560 what I'm saying? That can be, that can be a big fucking hindrance to, to recovery. 0.95
01:12:13.660 When you're creative, you create a lot of ways you can figure shit out of yourself. 0.98
01:12:17.120 Yeah, buddy, buddy. 0.89
01:12:17.720 That's the same. I got, I just got like, I think I'm like one, maybe 150 days maybe.
01:12:22.320 Yeah, I remember talking to you, we were both at the same time.
01:12:26.640 We're on the, it's the same journey. I don't know if I'll have, you know, these days forever.
01:12:30.240 We'll see.
01:12:31.560 Well, man, but just to.
01:12:33.420 So people, so you started having to get them like behind the scenes?
01:12:35.960 Yeah, so I was buying them on the street and short story long, that was like in 2004,
01:12:42.320 I think. And, and then I ended up finally going to rehab, like pretty much at the peak
01:12:48.380 of Miss New Booty. You know what I'm saying? Of that. I did not enjoy that. You know, you're
01:12:53.180 asking did I enjoy the, the, when I first came into the game, the Ugly, when Ugly was
01:12:58.740 my first number, first ever release as far as a single and my first number one record.
01:13:04.000 And, and that was a great time. But the Miss New Booty time, man, it was just trying to
01:13:12.820 be in places, traveling around, running out of pills, just having to white knuckle it, be
01:13:18.500 tough, you know what I'm saying? Like, and get through, you know, just big shit, you know 0.99
01:13:23.760 what I mean? And things that I should have, you know, I should have been enjoying, you 0.99
01:13:28.140 know what I'm saying? It was a huge record, you know, and just so many blessings came from
01:13:32.820 it, you know, but my, my perception at that time was, was really fucked, you know what I'm 0.97
01:13:38.680 saying? But I remember I had like half a million dollars worth of shows over like a two month 0.87
01:13:45.820 period. And I told my manager, Bobby, I was like, man, I got to go. You know what I'm
01:13:51.880 saying? I said, I can't do it anymore, man. I said, I'm about to get on, about to check
01:13:56.300 out of here or something. I don't know what's, and.
01:13:59.620 Like how was it, did it get pretty like, cause I've had, like I've had some time where I
01:14:06.160 probably went to some strange, you know, I've been in some strange places trying to get
01:14:10.140 some cocaine. You know what it was for me? Getting chumped by people like meaning like
01:14:14.340 I got the number one song in the world at this time. And these motherfuckers got me 1.00
01:14:19.200 sitting in this bowling alley for six hours. Yeah. And it just, I couldn't take it anymore. 1.00
01:14:23.600 You know what I'm saying? It was just like, man, I can't be a punk ass motherfucker, but 1.00
01:14:27.080 so long, you know what I'm saying? Like, that's just the way I'm, the way my account is set 0.99
01:14:31.660 up. Oh, I want to do what I, that's hilarious way my account is set up. I want to do what
01:14:35.740 I want to do, man. That's all. I've always been that way. Have you always been that way?
01:14:39.140 But especially just to know that somebody, they on the phone laughing to their homeboys
01:14:42.320 talking about, man, I got, but man, I got him sitting up here at this bowling alley, man, 1.00
01:14:46.800 this shit crazy, you know, that kind of shit. And I'm just like. 1.00
01:14:49.880 Do you mean waiting for drug? Yeah, I'm just sitting there like, they're like, give you
01:14:53.920 the money and then they, they gonna ride up whatever. And I'm sitting there for six hours
01:14:58.280 on a Saturday and probably missing some shit that I'm supposed to be, you know what I mean? 0.95
01:15:01.560 And just, just, I, you know, I just couldn't, I couldn't do it anymore. You know what I'm 0.96
01:15:07.040 saying? And then just tired of being dope sick, man. Like, you know, that was, that was
01:15:12.540 the deal at that time. You know what I'm saying? It was the opiates, you know what I'm saying?
01:15:15.940 And, you know, I've, I don't go down the same street, you know what I'm saying? Like, like,
01:15:21.980 multiple times very often, you know what I'm saying? As far as that goes. But I, I would have
01:15:26.940 never, at that time, I could have never seen there being a day, a six hour period where
01:15:32.920 I didn't use like some type of opiate at that time. And I thought I, I would never be able
01:15:38.260 to get beyond that, you know? And I, and I did, you know, and I, suboxone is a part of
01:15:43.460 my journey. You know what I'm saying? I can say that's the only way I was able to, to stop
01:15:48.040 and, uh, and stay stopped as far as, and people say like, you just traded one addiction for
01:15:53.180 another. Yes and no. Because the difference is if I'm out here taking, uh, Roxie's and
01:15:58.780 Oxycontin and whatever else, especially this fentanyl world that's, that's, that's, uh,
01:16:05.020 that's going down out here now, that's, that's a whole different level. But, um, but when you
01:16:12.600 take suboxone, you can take four milligrams a day. This is just my experience now. You know
01:16:17.340 what I'm saying? I'm not the judge, jury and executioner on, on anything. You know what I'm
01:16:20.380 saying? In my opinion, in 250, I'll get you Coca-Cola. But. Man, you sound like Riff
01:16:25.080 Raff, bro. Y'all got some of the same thing, man. It's real interesting. Man, you know,
01:16:29.180 I ain't never met Riff Raff, man, but I, I, I know I've, I know it's just certain people 0.99
01:16:33.400 you didn't know you would fuck with them. You know what I'm saying? He's a special guy, 0.99
01:16:35.880 man. He's cool. He's real creative too. Nah, man. I seen him do the shit he did with a tennis
01:16:40.500 rack at that time, man. Some of the most unbelievable shit I've ever seen, man. He's a deep 1.00
01:16:44.060 dude. And we've got several mutual, you know, but anyway, so, um, but you know,
01:16:49.220 your tolerance doesn't go up on the Suboxone. You can take the same amount and it's never
01:16:53.580 gonna, your tolerance is never gonna like, you know, force you to take more where, whereas,
01:16:59.180 you know, when, when you're taking the other stuff, like your tolerance is just going to
01:17:03.360 slowly build and build. I've always wanted to do methadone. I've never done it. Yeah. I,
01:17:07.600 I've taken some methadone, but not as like a solution, but just as a, that's all you got.
01:17:12.560 But, um, um, but yeah, so, and, um, did you think a lot of times, like I, I've been in and out of the
01:17:21.800 program for maybe six years, right? Six years. I've been in and out since 2007. So what's that 15?
01:17:29.240 And I never thought I had this problem. I thought everything was pretty normal in my life, you know,
01:17:33.500 and it came on really later in my, you know, I thought for me, but when people came in with
01:17:39.040 opiate addiction, I always thought to me, it seemed like you had people that were real
01:17:45.500 alcoholics that were in there, but then some people just got so, like somebody goes in cause
01:17:50.960 they hurt their back. That's not a person that's, and then they get, I mean, people were getting so
01:17:56.620 addicted to opiates.
01:17:57.320 But your mind doesn't know the difference is the thing. You know what I'm saying? Like if it's
01:18:01.700 just like, I know people, my old sponsor, shout out to Steven K down on the grains, but he, uh,
01:18:07.420 he was like, I ain't taking nothing. He said, I don't care what happens to me. I ain't taking no
01:18:11.300 pain medication. He said, cause my brain's not going to know the difference. You know what I'm
01:18:14.520 saying? That shit gets in my system. It's going to do what it does. You know what I'm saying? 1.00
01:18:17.860 Regardless of the reason being righteous or, or, you know, it being prescribed by a doctor
01:18:22.900 or anything like that. You know what I'm saying?
01:18:24.560 It feels like they made a cheat code when they made, uh, opiates though, when they made
01:18:29.020 like some of these opiates, it feels like the, these companies, I mean, it's like they made
01:18:36.520 so many more people addicts that were.
01:18:38.780 Oh man, you can't tell me it was, and I, you know, I could break it down even, even on a
01:18:43.180 more freakier level, man. It's just like, it's very interesting to me that 2000, up to say
01:18:49.880 2008, there were pain pills everywhere. And you could, you could, there's about three
01:18:54.740 or four cities in America you could get heroin in, port cities type stuff. Like, you know,
01:19:00.400 New York, LA, uh, maybe Baltimore, New Orleans, you know what I'm saying? Like you just couldn't
01:19:06.280 get heroin in a lot of places, you know what I'm saying? Um, and I would know, you know,
01:19:12.220 especially like anything that was actually anywhere close to resembling actual real heroin.
01:19:18.020 And, um, and then I don't know, we go fight a war, you know what I'm saying? In the golden
01:19:24.860 trial or where the poppy fields, the most poppy fields are in the whole world. And I'm not saying
01:19:31.840 that's the only reason that that, that war took place or there's a primary reason, but, but
01:19:35.600 here, fast forward to now, hell, it's damn difficult to get a pain pill. You know what
01:19:41.180 I'm saying? Like a lot of, um, you know, uh, parents of, of, you know, uh, kids that
01:19:48.800 had overdosed and died, started going to Congress, you know, started basically letting their presence
01:19:54.100 be felt and letting their, you know, feelings be felt, you know, and, and voicing, you know,
01:19:59.000 their angst and, and sorrow, you know, and, and I think some pressure was applied, you know
01:20:04.980 what I'm saying? For the, as far as the pain pills to, to tighten up on that. But then
01:20:10.380 now here comes this fentanyl shit. But even before that, I mean, they got selling heroin 0.99
01:20:18.740 in Huntsville, Alabama, you know what I'm saying? Like it's, it's, it's all over the
01:20:22.220 place, but the, the, the pills were cleaned up to a, to a large measure, you know what
01:20:27.620 I'm saying? But, um, and it's just interesting, you know what I'm saying? I mean, you know,
01:20:32.360 I wouldn't be shocked if our government is selling our own drugs to it. I wouldn't, or
01:20:36.640 somebody is, some bigger picture. Or it may not, who knows who it could be. Like, you
01:20:40.260 know, it could be some corporation that just has that much pool and, you know, they just,
01:20:44.800 you know, funded this one campaign of this one person who has influence. Who knows? You
01:20:49.580 know what I'm saying? Like I'm, like I said, I just, I can only speculate because they damn 0.99
01:20:53.540 sure don't invite me to the meetings or whatever kind of shit they're running. 0.99
01:20:57.040 I got an email. Yeah, for real, you know? And, um, and so I don't, I don't know, but 0.99
01:21:04.240 those, those things, what Arsenio Hall used to say, things that make you go, hmm. I got
01:21:09.920 to go on his show one time. That was a real highlight for me.
01:21:12.140 Oh man, that would have been the shit. 0.98
01:21:12.920 When his show came back on, that was the first show I ever got to do standup comedy 0.99
01:21:15.680 on was Arsenio.
01:21:16.980 Arsenio, man. That was so epic when I was young.
01:21:19.380 Dude, it was huge, man. And then in Living Color, bruh.
01:21:22.920 Yeah, Living Color. You know, I used to watch Johnny Carson too. I actually remember watching
01:21:28.360 Johnny Carson.
01:21:29.800 You know, and that was, and I remember when he, when Jay Leno took over for him and I
01:21:33.460 actually ended up doing the Jay Leno show.
01:21:35.380 Wow.
01:21:36.140 Yeah, and Jay Leno used to do the Cool Ranch Dorito commercials. But, um, yeah, man, David
01:21:41.480 Letterman did David, man, that's just, what a blessed journey, man.
01:21:44.680 Yeah, you've gotten to have so many unique experiences, especially for, you know, somebody
01:21:49.200 from.
01:21:49.880 Not bad for a farmer with a pitchfork.
01:21:51.340 Nuh-uh. Not bad at all.
01:21:53.400 Man, you know, my old high school football coach used to say, guys, you don't have to
01:21:58.120 take a backseat to anybody. Rest in peace, Jim Holly. You know, and that's something
01:22:02.140 that just stuck with me through life. You know what I'm saying? Anytime I feel overwhelmed
01:22:06.020 or feel like, oh, I'm not worthy of this. No, no, you don't have to take a backseat
01:22:10.060 to anybody. You know what I'm saying? Anything or anybody. You know what I'm saying? You worked
01:22:15.820 hard to get here just like everybody else. You know what I'm saying? Like they say, you put
01:22:19.380 your socks on one leg at a time just like everybody else. I take shits, they take shits. I fart, 1.00
01:22:24.980 they fart, you know. You know, I like chalupas. They may or may not.
01:22:29.260 They may or may not. Yeah, sometimes I think my thing I struggle with sometimes, I mean,
01:22:33.840 I struggle with a lot of stuff, but I really struggle with, I think, like making, like what
01:22:41.660 other people think of me. Yeah. You know, that's always been really hard. Anybody that
01:22:46.180 says that they don't is either just not cursed with any self-awareness. And some people are
01:22:51.720 just like that. Some of the biggest stars just, they don't have self-awareness. They
01:22:55.520 don't. Right, so they're not even thinking about the beginning of it. Yeah, about how
01:22:58.260 do they, how are people perceiving them? You know what I'm saying? It's like. Oh, it'd be
01:23:01.460 a blessing. Yeah. And a curse. It would be a curse and a blessing. You know what I'm
01:23:04.540 saying? That's just the way it is with everything, but. But yeah, I wish that
01:23:07.440 didn't, because here's what I wish. I had a little bit more of my own. I wish I'd
01:23:13.500 had a bit more somebody helping me build my own self-worth when I was young, so I
01:23:17.600 had a little bit more. It just wasn't a part of the culture of growing up, you
01:23:21.940 know, like that. Yeah, but some people got it because they're, you know, somebody
01:23:25.620 told, I just feel like some people got it. I'm not like having a pity party. No, I
01:23:29.780 understand. I just wish that I had a little more of it. That's the reason, and it's tragic that
01:23:33.300 you don't have kids. You know what I'm saying? It's tragic that I don't have. I
01:23:37.240 know a lot of, and that's what we talk about, that gap between males and females
01:23:42.720 that keeps getting wider and wider. You know what I mean? Like in the way that we
01:23:46.240 connect with one another, it just, what's your cash up? You know, like, you know what
01:23:50.320 I'm saying? Like it's gotten a lot more like just out front transactional, it seems
01:23:55.520 like, you know what I'm saying? And so I don't, since I got divorced in 2019, I
01:23:59.640 haven't seriously dated anybody because I don't know how to fucking date in this 0.56
01:24:03.080 world, but that's a whole nother story. But, but I'm saying like, we're over 40, 0.83
01:24:07.520 you know what I'm saying? And so like, bro, I mean, like, I just know, man, we
01:24:10.700 gotta get a fucking kid, bro. I know a lot of real deal men that need to have 0.99
01:24:14.520 kids, you know what I'm saying? Because I would like to know what a child with my
01:24:18.280 stuff, and I love my parents, man. This isn't no, they, they did the best they
01:24:23.700 could with, with what they were equipped with, you know what I'm saying? What
01:24:27.640 they'd been given and they did a great job because, you know, I've done a lot of
01:24:31.420 things and they, and they're a part of that, you know what I'm saying? And, and
01:24:34.220 they love me, you know, but as far as just like believing in a, in a, in a child
01:24:40.120 and like giving him the freedom to really like express himself and encouraging
01:24:44.080 him, you know what I mean? Like, and still being stern, you know what I'm saying?
01:24:47.860 And being, being a disciplinarian, but, but just, you know, not discouraging dreams
01:24:53.680 and, you know what I'm saying? Like, and they were just trying to protect me, you know what I'm
01:24:57.420 saying? By discouraging dreams, by saying, you know, that's just, that's just silly 0.72
01:25:01.640 foolishness, you know what I'm saying? Like you, you need to, you know, have a
01:25:05.280 different plan, you know what I'm saying? You need to have a practical plan, one that's
01:25:08.360 realistic, you know what I'm saying? They were just trying to, you know, but I know
01:25:12.900 now that all that's bullshit, that's programming, you know what I'm saying? That's 0.99
01:25:16.760 fear-based programming, you know, and we can, we can do a lot in this world, you know,
01:25:22.100 you know what, you're evidence of it. And so I would, for us to have children and be
01:25:27.140 able to just, and it might go all, you know, awry.
01:25:30.620 Right, it might go awry.
01:25:32.180 Like, cause we might, they might, cause there's some craziness to the way we're wired too,
01:25:36.380 you know what I'm saying? And they might, a little too much love and not quite enough
01:25:40.420 rigid upbringing might make it where they just go be hellions or something.
01:25:43.800 Right, we might go the other way.
01:25:44.960 Yeah. But, you know, I just know a lot of men that, Paulo De Don, Cliff Kingsbury, friends
01:25:51.340 of mine, that over 40 and don't have kids.
01:25:54.320 Cliff that coaches Cardinals?
01:25:55.400 Yeah, yeah, that's my boy, man.
01:25:56.440 Oh, yeah, really?
01:25:57.220 Shout out to Cliff, man.
01:25:57.960 Yeah, dude, Cliff is a king, bro.
01:25:59.260 We got to be real cool when he was coaching at Texas Tech before he got that job, man.
01:26:05.020 And that's, that's a great fellow right there, man.
01:26:07.200 He seems real cool, man.
01:26:08.380 He's a stand-up guy, man.
01:26:09.300 I'm saying, every, every area. I think Cliff Kingsbury should run for president, honestly.
01:26:13.760 Gang, bro.
01:26:14.480 I mean, he's just that kind of guy, like, man, he, he can just relate to anybody.
01:26:18.480 He's, he's a principled guy. His principles don't get compromised for anything, you know
01:26:23.460 what I'm saying? He stands on what he stands for. And, you know, I'm just using him as
01:26:28.200 an example.
01:26:28.980 Yeah, no.
01:26:29.280 Like, Paulo De Don, great guy, you know what I'm saying? He's a brother of mine, like,
01:26:34.060 not a friend, but a brother, super producer, produced 32, 33 number one records. You know,
01:26:39.600 you don't have kids. I don't, I don't have kids. You don't have kids. It's just, that was
01:26:43.260 almost unheard of, you know, like, in the 1950s or whatever, you know what I'm saying?
01:26:47.540 Oh, you had the cabin kids, the only thing you did.
01:26:49.800 You know?
01:26:50.260 You know, I worry sometimes that, honestly, I think I worry that if I did have kids, that
01:26:56.500 there would be a, I'd somehow do the same thing, I think. I think there's probably some
01:27:03.160 fear of that.
01:27:03.560 My girlfriend was pregnant at one time. This is like 2006. Yeah, like, right around that
01:27:10.920 same new booty time when everything was coming to a head. And she had a miscarriage at, I 0.98
01:27:17.560 think it was like four months. And just in those four months, I know the way I felt, thinking
01:27:24.960 I was getting ready to be a father, man, it's a different feeling, man. Like, it's like, I
01:27:31.520 got to get my shit together. Because I can let myself down. You know what I'm saying? 0.99
01:27:35.660 But I can't let a mini-me down. You know what I'm saying? I got to get it right, get it
01:27:40.480 tight for this little joker right here. You know what I'm saying? I can't be playing about
01:27:43.460 another life that's, you know, and I can only imagine a child being born and looking at that
01:27:49.740 child and seeing yourself in it. Like, some physical thing, your eyes or something. I can
01:27:54.280 only imagine how that would feel. And I never thought I wouldn't have kids. But I was kind
01:27:59.160 of careful back in the quote-unquote heyday. Because I had so many friends that had multiple
01:28:03.140 baby mamas. And everybody's life was just miserable when that was the case. You know 0.99
01:28:07.560 what I'm saying? Like, three baby mamas. And, you know, they got two other baby dads. You
01:28:12.700 know what I'm saying? And it's just, it's not good on a child.
01:28:14.940 It's like Red Rover at Thanksgiving. Yeah.
01:28:16.540 So I didn't want that. I didn't want to be a part of perpetuating that type of deal.
01:28:22.000 And so I was, you know, and then God bless my ex-wife. I think maybe with us, just by the
01:28:27.600 time we actually got married, maybe we were already kind of coming unraveled. And it just,
01:28:32.940 spiritually, it just never lined up the right way.
01:28:37.060 You think it'll still happen? Do you think about it?
01:28:39.500 I haven't given up. I'm not too, like, thrilled about the prospects of being 86 years old at
01:28:44.360 my child's high school graduation. But, you know.
01:28:47.680 My dad was 70 when I was born, which is crazy, man.
01:28:51.820 Pops. That's what's up.
01:28:53.280 I only say that is because I keep finding myself talking to guys who are, we getting
01:28:58.120 older and we don't have any children yet. So I started, I used to think my dad was crazy
01:29:01.380 and I'm like, damn, I just, if I could beat him by 10 years, that'd be good. 0.96
01:29:03.540 You think it was just because we were just dream chasing, man? Like, you know. 0.98
01:29:05.960 That's a good point, man. You know what? Dream chasing was like, other things to me seemed
01:29:11.560 boring, bro.
01:29:12.740 Right.
01:29:13.140 It was like, you know, I could go have a family. I pop, somebody had me and they ain't doing
01:29:17.580 shit out here. I could go fucking do that in half hour if I want. 0.99
01:29:20.740 Right. I felt that like that too, man. 0.99
01:29:21.580 I wanted to like, what can I do? I want to fucking. 0.99
01:29:24.540 I just did not. I was scared to death of being in my 20s or something and feeling like my 0.99
01:29:31.380 whole life was planned out. Like, okay, so I'm going to do this for like 46 years and
01:29:37.480 then retire. Like, oh my God. Like, hey, much respect to anybody that works like that because
01:29:43.440 I'm not cut out for it. You know what I'm saying? I'm not.
01:29:46.580 Right, right. I'm not saying, yeah, I'm not saying it was horrible. I'm just saying I'm
01:29:49.740 not, I could not have done that.
01:29:51.240 It was not for me. You know what I mean? It just was not, I would, I would have, if
01:29:54.740 I didn't have create creativity, you know, this outlet of creativity that I have with
01:29:59.800 writing, you know, recording music and stuff like I, um, I would have probably already
01:30:05.700 like checked out of here. You know what I'm saying? It's, it's that vital to me. And
01:30:10.360 so just to be able to live that way, you know what I'm saying? And make a living that
01:30:14.460 way crucial, you know what I'm saying? But that's why I always tell people like, man,
01:30:19.640 I'm, I'm going to be 90 years old rapping. Like, fuck. I don't give a fuck what you 1.00
01:30:24.460 like or don't like, like what you say about me. And you know, oh, you're old. Who cares? 1.00
01:30:30.680 Like still don't make more money than you ever going to make your whole life. But sorry,
01:30:35.100 I had to, I had to.
01:30:36.340 A lot of people never get a chance to make millions of dollars.
01:30:38.920 But my point is, this is like, it's not a job. It's not a hobby. It's not like
01:30:43.060 it's a, it's at the core of who I am. It's a function of my spirit, man. Like, you know
01:30:50.240 what I'm saying? It's, it's, I remember Jay-Z had a line where he said, get a grip,
01:30:54.220 bitch. This is how I get through life. You know, but how I get through life and how I always 1.00
01:31:00.080 related to that is this, you know what I'm saying? This is, you know, this was a, man,
01:31:07.380 it's just been so special. Like, like this, this art form, you know, shout out to those
01:31:12.760 people, you know, the black and brown people in the Bronx, New York in the seventies that,
01:31:17.700 you know, were doing what they was doing and living the way they was living. And that all
01:31:22.220 that formed this perfect storm that, you know, um, that this, this music and this art form,
01:31:29.420 I mean, in this culture, you know, sprung from, man, I'm just, I'm so grateful. It found
01:31:35.540 me, you know, on a dirt road, 20 minutes North of LaGrange, Georgia. And it's kind of
01:31:40.420 wild, huh? Changed my life, man. Like, you know, so I, I honor that at every turn, you
01:31:45.300 know what I'm saying? Like, there's nothing I put ahead of, I think hip hop is a religion.
01:31:49.600 I mean, what, aside from like the quote unquote traditional religions, name something that's
01:31:56.220 brought more people together from different walks of life worldwide. Man, it's, it's had,
01:32:04.040 it's had quite the impact on this globe, man. You know, music, music has. Yeah. I mean,
01:32:10.300 but, but especially hip hop, because like I said, it's hip hop unified, you know, maybe
01:32:16.040 it was just part of the, just the timing of like, um, when hip hop kind of exploded, you
01:32:21.420 know, onto, onto the scene. But man, it was just a lot of, like I said, a lot of racist
01:32:25.960 hearts, potentially racist hearts that could, or hearts that could have developed into, you
01:32:31.220 know, being exactly what their, their parents and their grandparents, you know, and going
01:32:36.580 on back down the line were in the way they thought, you know what I'm saying? But, um,
01:32:42.640 I know people, you know, that, that, like I said, it might just be that one thing they
01:32:48.380 could hang their hat on. Man, I love podcast so much, you know what I'm saying? I want to
01:32:53.100 be racist, but damn, man. Yeah, man. Like, yeah. Cause then you, cause the, the lesson 1.00
01:32:56.940 to be learned is. Yeah. The three, six mafia that shakes me up. Yeah. 1,000%. Like, and
01:33:03.280 the, the lesson to be learned is, is, you know what? There's, we're all human. You know what
01:33:09.280 I'm saying? So we all have flaws and you can't, them sweeping indictments and broad ass generalizations,
01:33:16.920 you know what I'm saying? Trying to lump everybody that looks a certain way into any kind of, you
01:33:21.360 know, like bold that just says, all those people are just like this, you know what I'm
01:33:26.120 saying? That's, I know there's no fruit on that tree. I wish, I wish you could definitely
01:33:30.380 make things easier. Yeah. But, but you know, I, I just don't, you know, I, I have brothers
01:33:35.980 that, that look a lot of different ways. Charlie's my brother. He's, you know, he's a black guy,
01:33:40.600 you know what I'm saying? I, I, I got a lot of black brothers, you know what I'm saying? I
01:33:44.660 got some white brothers too. You know what I'm saying? I got some Mexican, Mexican, Puerto
01:33:48.120 Rican brothers, you know what I'm saying? Oh yeah. And so, you know, that's, I, a brother
01:33:52.840 to me is someone that shares the same ideals and principles that, that I, that I have, that
01:33:57.280 I try to live. Yeah. It's funny, man. I got this new fitness guy or the, this athletic
01:34:02.280 coach, man, this black guy. And I've, man, I just love, he's like, I love being around
01:34:06.820 the dude, bro. Yeah. Energy, man. He, I mean, he like inspires me up. He inspires
01:34:11.760 me. He like, and he's like one of the best fitness coaches, man. That's what a trainer's
01:34:15.240 got to be too, man. He got to make you just want to be there, like to be near it and just
01:34:19.300 get in, get in the thick of the shit with it. Yeah. He does that, but it also, it's on 0.99
01:34:22.600 like even more of just like a, I don't know. Right in general. Yeah. It's like, man, it
01:34:26.600 makes me, I feel inspired by him. That's awesome, man. That's great, man. I love, I love
01:34:32.640 being, like, that's really my, that's my drug. That's my true drug. That's the reason
01:34:37.560 I would ever do drugs or, you know what I'm saying? Like, because I don't, man, if I'm
01:34:42.400 inspired, if, man, there's not much I couldn't do, bro. You know what I'm saying? Like, if
01:34:46.680 I'm inspired, I really feel like I could have been president or something. Like, but if I'm
01:34:50.100 not inspired, you might want to get somebody else to help you carry the groceries in from
01:34:54.360 the car. You know what I'm saying? Like, I'm pretty useless.
01:34:57.960 At, um, so after, so going through, do you feel like that having a,
01:35:02.640 addiction and struggling with it that it had an effect on your career? Do you feel
01:35:05.960 like your career has played out just kind of how it has?
01:35:09.120 Yeah, it's 100% because, um, first of all, right after New Booty and after that, that
01:35:15.940 because that was a top one, that was like a. Oh, no, that was a number one record, man.
01:35:19.720 Like, like, I, you know, my Wikipedia, there's some. Oh, I didn't even look at your
01:35:24.480 Wikipedia. Well, I've tried to change stuff on there, man. Like, I don't, they change it
01:35:27.680 back. It's just crazy. Oh, they're fucking, that's a mafia, bro. I don't know what's going
01:35:31.360 on with that. But anyway, and I'm not fucking five, nine either. 0.96
01:35:34.680 And take that ugly ass picture off of there. Bro, my picture's horrible, bro. Bring my 1.00
01:35:39.400 shit up, bro. It's the worst. Look at my Wikipedia, dude. I don't look like that. 1.00
01:35:42.520 Look, let Charlie decide who uglier. You know what I said? Whoever's uglier. Whoever controls 0.53
01:35:46.460 the gates of my page, I must have fucked their girlfriend or something at some point. Like, 1.00
01:35:50.060 I'm sorry. I didn't know. Who's the bad? Both of us got a bad one. Look at this picture. Look
01:35:55.980 at it right down on the right. Oh, dang, bro. Click on it. Oh, my God. Dude, you look like
01:36:01.420 a hitman at an Asian restaurant, bro. Damn, bro. Vladimir. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You look like 1.00
01:36:08.880 a Russian. It's like I'm in America trying to kind of dress cool, but like, it's like flea market 1.00
01:36:12.940 shit. Like, now bring mine out there. My shit looks horrible too, bro. I look like 0.99
01:36:18.720 I've been struggling, man. Damn, my shit hugger look bad. Damn, look at me. I look fucking 1.00
01:36:24.440 retarded, bro. It just don't look like you. I look mentally retarded, bro. No offense if 1.00
01:36:29.360 anybody's retarded, bro. Yeah, I mean, yeah. I mean, I am sometimes. Me too. 0.91
01:36:33.260 What do you remember when you took that picture? I just remember. I look at my, I look at them
01:36:37.080 cross-eyed. I look something wrong with me. I wonder how old that picture was. It was probably
01:36:41.900 six years ago. Shit, I mean, that picture of me, that's another, that's the fucked up 1.00
01:36:46.260 part about it. You got a nice outfit on. 2005, yeah, but I, like, you always say, like, he's 1.00
01:36:53.200 like, don't ever shave your fucking beard again. Like, that's what people say. I'm 0.99
01:36:56.780 like, well, somebody should have told me that a little earlier in this process. There's
01:36:59.840 a lot of pictures out there of me, but anyway, and I had this egghead, like, I used to have
01:37:04.680 this, I would be lazy and not want to go to the, to the, like, real barber. I'm big
01:37:08.860 on haircuts and shit now, but, uh, I just shaved my own head, you know, like, down to 0.99
01:37:13.520 the scalp. Oh, yeah, to do whatever. Yeah, I cut my hair for, like, probably 32 years, 0.98
01:37:17.200 man. Yeah, man, that's, you know, but it's. Or whenever I could, so probably only about
01:37:20.660 16 years. But, man, you, uh, you don't look bad there. I feel like I look bad, but I feel
01:37:27.120 like right there, you just don't look like you. It just didn't, that doesn't even look
01:37:30.580 like you. Yeah, I went through a period I was trying to fit in in Hollywood and look more
01:37:33.740 clean cut. Yeah, you look like, uh, you know what you look like? You look like, uh, Dane
01:37:37.720 Cook's, like, little brother, out-of-shape brother or something like that. Yeah, like
01:37:40.900 Shane Cook. Shane Cook. He look like, uh, Dude Daddy. Who? Uh, Blow Move, John Depp Daddy.
01:37:49.200 He don't look like Ray Liotta. Man, right there on that part right there. Oh, I could maybe
01:37:53.080 see him. Yeah, I seen him. Like, the younger, like, Goodfellas Ray Liotta. I can kind of
01:37:57.400 see that. Yeah, kind of good. Rest in peace, Ray Liotta, by the way. I know, nobody even
01:38:02.100 cared that he died, bruh. That's just the world we fucking live in, man. Nobody even 0.99
01:38:06.000 cared. These days, nobody, it's like, it used to be like, man. It's just like, even
01:38:09.120 a hit song now, man. It's like, you know, it goes up to, yeah, it's like, you get a
01:38:13.340 week, you know what I'm saying? And then everybody's on to something else. Well, dude, I remember
01:38:16.400 we went camping one time when I was a kid with, like, uh, Boy Scouts or somebody. I
01:38:20.680 don't know. Could have just been a damn pedophile, bruh. Oh, Lord. But we was out there. 1.00
01:38:24.180 Oh, Lord. And, uh, I told everybody before we left, I said, you know, Jay Leno died. And they
01:38:30.080 didn't have any social media. And so everybody, the whole weekend was like, damn, Jay Leno 0.99
01:38:33.860 died, man. And people were talking about it. Some guy, some, some kid's dad was even crying 0.99
01:38:39.080 about it. And then we got back and everybody's like, this motherfucker lied, bruh. But nobody 1.00
01:38:44.240 knew for three days, but it was like, wow. What's the point of doing that? Like, I think
01:38:48.540 just, I wanted to create some ambiance or something, you know, and, uh, create some like, uh, what
01:38:54.080 do you call it? Like, uh, not nostalgia, but like morale, like everybody. Yeah. We're in
01:38:58.100 this, huh? Let's do it for Jay. Yeah. And, uh, but I don't know what I was even talking
01:39:03.820 about, but, uh, so take me through. Yeah. So let's just, so I want to be able to relate
01:39:08.560 a lot of our audience struggles with, uh, addiction and just different things. That's
01:39:12.360 a lot of our audience. A lot of people do nowadays, you know, they were saying the other
01:39:16.420 day, uh, 70% of, uh, of adults in America are on one medication or at least one medication.
01:39:23.700 Um, so what effects did you feel like it had on you as you started to realize?
01:39:29.460 Man, all right. So the, so when I first went to rehab and I got out, like that was the height
01:39:34.600 of my career, you know what I'm saying? I just, you know. How hard was it to be in rehab
01:39:38.280 while your career was going? Well, I mean, at the height. That's the time when I was like,
01:39:41.640 like trying to fuck everything with a, with a vagina and breasts and stuff like, you know 1.00
01:39:46.400 what I'm saying? So I was kind of on that tip. Like I, I remember like, but that's when 1.00
01:39:50.940 I honestly, when I got over, um, you know, being a homophobe, you know, because there
01:39:57.400 were a lot of people, you know, I kind of went down there on some arrogant stuff. I'm
01:40:00.160 withdrawing and I'm like, yeah, I heard y'all like to make people rule with gay people 0.98
01:40:05.020 too. Put me in no room with no gay people. You know what I'm saying? Yeah. I was, man, 0.95
01:40:08.960 I'm from, you know what I'm saying? I'm from the South, man. Like I, I'm, I'm pretty
01:40:13.700 enlightened guy, but I just, I'd never been around any gay people to be honest with you.
01:40:17.380 Oh yeah. Yeah. I remember we wasn't around any gays until later.
01:40:20.680 So we fear what we don't, you know, what we haven't been exposed to, what we don't
01:40:23.900 understand, what just a certain like, um, presentation and depiction of something
01:40:28.800 that we received. And, you know, and one of the, you know, coolest, a couple of cool
01:40:34.480 cats that I was in, in, uh, in treatment with were gay, man. And they, some of the best
01:40:39.400 people I've ever known to this day. And it just, you know what I'm saying? It's like, I was
01:40:43.720 always so focused on black folks and white folks. Cause that's really what I was, you 0.80
01:40:48.020 know, in the, in the mud with, you know what I'm saying? And so, but then I would be, could
01:40:53.020 be judgmental in some other way to some other group of people. It just, it was just so flawed
01:40:57.460 me, you know what I'm saying? But, but I'm being around that experience and, and, uh,
01:41:01.960 and meeting those guys and then countless other gay folks since then that, that I've, that 0.95
01:41:06.840 I've had the pleasure of knowing, you know, it's, I'm just not fucked up with it. I don't 0.97
01:41:10.660 care. As long as you don't harm, um, children, elderly people, mentally handicapped people,
01:41:16.820 animals, or just people that can't defend themselves. I'm not really judging a lot in
01:41:21.980 this world. You know what I'm saying? Cause I don't know what the hell you've been through.
01:41:24.880 You know what I'm saying? I don't know what it's like inside your head and what your experiences
01:41:27.640 have shaped you into, into becoming, you know what I'm saying? So, but there's just certain
01:41:31.940 lines you can't cross, you know what I'm saying? And that's just the way it is.
01:41:34.900 Cause if you do, we got to get you out of here. You know what I'm saying? Like you
01:41:38.160 can't be messing with children and, you know, you just can't be, you know, just, just, um,
01:41:44.000 recklessly go, you know, just pillaging humanity, you know, helpless humanity. But, um, so after
01:41:52.820 you went to the rehab, yeah, I blamed the music industry and music for, so I went two years
01:41:59.100 without doing music. Then I didn't go really go to the studio one day. I was going to NA 0.97
01:42:04.660 meetings. I mean, I was going to, you know, uh, 12 step recovery meetings and, um, were
01:42:11.320 you getting better? Yeah, I was, but, but at the same time I wasn't, I was pretty much
01:42:17.500 just, I had some pretty good at that time I had some pretty good recovery. Um, but you
01:42:23.200 know what it was, man, I just wasn't, I was just sitting there, you know, and it got to a
01:42:28.640 point where I started going to do shows and it was kind of tormenting, like, you
01:42:33.880 know, going in these clubs and, and just not being that, that, uh, atmosphere of recovery
01:42:40.800 internally. It just, it just got weaker and weaker and weaker. And, but it got to the point
01:42:45.880 where clean and sober, like I really wanted to check out of here, you know what I'm saying?
01:42:50.140 Because it just, I guess I just hadn't stuck around long enough for the, for that no spiritual
01:42:56.540 change to happen or whatever, even though it was, you know, a long time, you know what
01:43:02.080 I'm saying? Over a year. And, um, I don't know. I just, it just was really, really excruciating
01:43:09.560 and I was just white knuckling it. And I mean, finally I was just, I had no, it was either
01:43:14.860 pick up a pistol or pick up a drink, you know? And, um, but you know, I can, I can say that
01:43:20.840 like, you know, I, then the next time it was like drinking really became an issue. You know
01:43:27.420 what I'm saying? I didn't go back to the pills or anything like that, but you know, being an
01:43:32.180 addict, like I'll make anything enough if that's, if that's all there is, you know what
01:43:36.700 I'm saying? Or if I, if I've got myself convinced that that's all, um, you know, all that, that
01:43:42.340 I, that I can allow myself to do, you know, I can make anything literally like sex, you
01:43:48.120 know, like any external thing, man. Like if, if I like something, I'm probably going to
01:43:53.460 do it till it makes me sick. You know what I'm saying?
01:43:55.880 Yeah. Meet the, yeah, man. I can do that. I can totally relate to that, man. I will find
01:44:01.080 anything to take me out of the present moment, you know, to kind of take me away from having
01:44:04.940 the McRibs are back for a month. I'm just going to eat them until I vomit McRib every, you
01:44:09.600 know what I'm saying? Whatever. You know what I'm saying? Like I just, oh man,
01:44:12.320 if you had that new, this or that, this new thing Taco Bell's got, you know, I'm going
01:44:15.800 to go, if I like it, I'm just going to eat it until I hate it. Yeah. You know, a person,
01:44:20.680 a woman like, come here. Oh, I love you. I love you. I love you. You know what I'm
01:44:24.420 saying? Like, oh, we hate each other cause you know, cause we're toxic and you know,
01:44:29.060 we're, we're like around each other too much and you know what I'm saying? It's like we melt
01:44:34.320 into each other and you don't, you've lost perspective on who you are as a person. I, you know,
01:44:38.380 because we, I just wanted to just give me, give me, give me, you know what I'm saying?
01:44:42.860 Fill up this hole inside of me, you know? And, and, uh, as I've learned, you know, that hole
01:44:48.240 can only be filled with, you know, the spiritual component really like when that can mean a lot
01:44:52.900 of different things to a lot of different people. But, uh, cause really all, I think all we want
01:44:57.360 is peace, you know, this wasn't peace, man. You know, at this point, I, I, I don't know.
01:45:03.780 I, I just, I know that I have given a lot to my addiction. You know what I'm saying? I, I can't
01:45:09.440 say I lost it to my addiction. I say, you know, I volunteered, you know what I mean? Yeah. But, um,
01:45:14.260 but at the same time, like I, I couldn't just, because it's been what it's been, I couldn't
01:45:20.040 imagine it any other way. You know what I'm saying? Because I don't know, you know, my best
01:45:24.800 friend, big Steve always says that, you know, when he went into rehab the first time and
01:45:29.840 he's been, he went to rehab one time and he's been sober. So he, oh six, so 16 years. I mean,
01:45:36.020 he works in recovery. Oh wow. Yeah. Yeah. Um, and he quit playing football and, you know,
01:45:43.740 and started a whole new life. And he says, if I kept playing, if I hadn't just like abruptly
01:45:49.080 just started a whole new chapter, he said, I wouldn't have been able to stay sober, you know,
01:45:53.640 but me, because you don't, it's not like Brett Favre. If your body starts letting you down
01:45:58.880 and you age out of, you know, making music, you still in it. Yeah. And so like, you know,
01:46:02.920 I, I kept going, you know, it's just like, I don't know what else to do. It's like, you
01:46:08.620 know, it's just so it's ingrained in me, man. It's just a fun, like I said, a function of
01:46:13.140 my spirit. And so then you start going back to other parts, you know, of it as far as like
01:46:18.060 doing because I really, the studio I can handle, but it's, it's that road, man. It's hard. Yeah.
01:46:24.420 That road is, is what's going to ultimately always take me back, back to, to drinking and
01:46:29.320 you know, then ultimately some type of drug or whatever. Yeah. You know, that's one of
01:46:33.600 the toughest things, man. I was, uh, I was in so much pain. I remember sitting in my, in
01:46:38.840 my garage one day and saying, man, I'm just, I wasn't even doing anything. I was just sick
01:46:44.720 of myself. Yeah. I was like, man, I'm so, how do I, I'm just, I am literally sick of
01:46:53.620 myself. Man, I love myself. All I could think about was myself and it was kill. It was just
01:46:57.640 like, I don't know what it was, man. I'm so, I'm in awe of how great I can be, like how
01:47:02.560 amazing I can be. Yeah. And I'm in awe of the piece of shit that I can be as well. You
01:47:06.520 know what I'm saying? And it's like, it's crazy, man. I just, I, I know other people must
01:47:12.380 be like, what the fuck is wrong with you, man? Because like, you know, because people, 0.97
01:47:17.560 the people closest to me have been experiencing it just like I have, but even me, I'm like, 0.99
01:47:21.500 what the fuck? You know what I mean? Cause I've never, the only thing I've ever been consistent 0.99
01:47:25.560 at is being inconsistent. You know what I'm saying? Yeah. And, uh, I don't know what it
01:47:30.000 is, man. It's just something about something within me. It's like, uh, I had a therapist,
01:47:35.780 shout out to Richard Lee, Richard Lee Nielsen in Atlanta. He said, um, he called it the
01:47:40.020 saboteur. You know what I'm saying? Like this, there's just something in it. He said,
01:47:44.000 you just, there's a part of you, you know, inside of you that just wants you to be unhappy.
01:47:49.060 Just, there's a part of you that wants you to be unhappy. So like, that's like the self
01:47:54.620 destruct mechanism, like things are going great. You know what I'm saying? Met this new
01:47:58.460 girl, you know, got this new situation, whatever things are going great. Ooh, things are going
01:48:02.780 great. I need to fuck some shit up. You know what I mean? Like, and it's not a conscious 1.00
01:48:06.900 thing. Yeah. It's not even a conscious thing. That's what's amazing sometimes is I got this
01:48:11.940 little motherfucker inside of me that wants to, you know, just likes to get it riled 0.99
01:48:16.140 back up. Yes. It's the same reason why I told people Jay Leno died, man. It really 1.00
01:48:21.320 is, bro. But it really is. It's because something inside of me, there needs to be, I need something
01:48:29.500 to be messed up. Cause it's the, I gotta have somebody to fight. You know what I'm saying?
01:48:34.060 Like an idea that I'm fighting. Like that's the, if I don't have that, I'm pretty much
01:48:38.100 useless. Like if I gotta have the edge, you know what I'm saying? Something to light that
01:48:41.620 fire. You know what I'm saying? I've made up stuff and trick myself into thinking shit
01:48:46.180 and whatever, like just to come on, let's get going. But yeah, that's crazy, man. 0.98
01:48:51.040 But it's funny because it's, it might be just, this is exactly the way ever. That's why a lot
01:48:57.480 of times I believe I am exactly where I'm supposed to be because even if I behave that way,
01:49:02.620 that's the same way I behave that got me to where. Yeah, exactly. Exactly. The double
01:49:08.060 edged sword. You know what I'm saying? And I think about that all the time too. It's
01:49:11.840 like that it serves us and it just, it destroys us too. Like it's like balance, I think is
01:49:17.460 the thing that if we have like an ultimate purpose as far as internally, what I feel like
01:49:22.100 we're supposed to accomplish while we're here is to learn some balance. You know what I'm
01:49:27.960 saying? Like in some, some discipline, you know, like they say, we're going to suffer
01:49:32.280 pain. It's either the pain of discipline or the pain of regret. And I've suffered the
01:49:36.320 pain of discipline at times and I, and I reap the benefits and I, and, and I've not been
01:49:41.920 disciplined at times, you know, and, and unavoidably the other pain of regret, man.
01:49:48.020 Yeah. It's hard, man. It's also hard, you know, it's not also like it's easy, but I, man,
01:49:54.420 I can just totally relate. You know, and nobody's got like, everybody is, is saddled
01:49:58.160 with something, you know what I'm saying? So just because a person doesn't have the
01:50:02.460 same issues that I have and that's, that's, you know, that's true humility. You know
01:50:06.740 what I'm saying? Is that self-awareness of understanding that, you know, I used to think
01:50:10.220 humility was like acting inferior when you really thought you were superior, like being
01:50:14.820 sheepish, like, Oh no, this whole thing, you know, or just whatever. Like, no, I'm not, 0.98
01:50:20.180 I'm not cute, whatever the fuck, you know what I'm saying? Just not, not taking compliments 0.98
01:50:24.000 well, all that kind of shit. Like that's being humble to me, you know what I'm saying? 0.99
01:50:27.080 Like, um, but I've, I've come to learn, you know, as I've grown and experienced life
01:50:33.620 that, um, humility is more like just kind of like a true understanding of self. Like
01:50:40.240 I got some good qualities about me, you know what I'm saying? I got some good shit going 0.99
01:50:43.680 on, man, but I also got some, some fucked up shit like that I need to work on, you know 0.99
01:50:48.620 what I'm saying? And I'm in the process with it, with, with working on those things and I'm 0.98
01:50:53.580 okay with where I'm at. And I understand that I'm no better or worse than anybody else.
01:50:57.620 You know what I'm saying? People just have, some people don't ever identify their strengths,
01:51:02.680 you know, or, you know, they, it doesn't register with them that, dang, this is how I can benefit
01:51:08.120 from my strengths. You know what I'm saying? Like I can make a living or help others or whatever,
01:51:13.340 you know what I'm saying? And so they just never turn them up or, or like shine that light
01:51:17.540 on them and get them all the way, you know, hitting on all cylinders. But you know, I,
01:51:22.260 I've just been in instances where other people, you know, like I'm good in a social setting,
01:51:28.420 you know what I'm saying? Like a cocktail, I'm a cocktail party superstar, you know what
01:51:32.520 I mean? Like, you know, just, I can shoot the shit with anybody, man. I get that from my 1.00
01:51:36.280 pops, man. And, um, and so people that aren't good in those types of settings that, that aren't
01:51:43.020 like personable people like that. I used to kind of maybe like look down on them a little
01:51:47.900 bit. Like, oh man, you just ain't fly with it. Like me, you know what I'm saying? Like
01:51:50.920 until I was in a situation, I'm not going to speak on what the, what the situation exactly
01:51:57.180 entailed, but where I was completely lost and a person that maybe I looked down on because
01:52:04.520 they didn't have a social quote unquote social skills that I had was in their element and it 0.99
01:52:10.400 saved my ass big time. You know what I'm saying? And it just, that just further like hammered 0.99
01:52:15.160 that point home. Like we all, we all got some shit that, that, that we're good at. You know 0.99
01:52:20.220 what I'm saying? We all got some shit we need to work on, man. We're all humans, you know, 0.99
01:52:23.280 it's, it's all going to need each other. Yeah. I mean, I promise you we are, man. I know. I
01:52:28.180 promise you, you know what I'm saying? It's just like anytime, whatever group that you
01:52:31.700 say, you know, like they're the problem. I promise you, you're going to be in a situation
01:52:36.860 where you need somebody from that group. I promise you, I've seen it too
01:52:40.360 many times. I mean, it's just, that's just the way the universe sorts shit out or God 0.95
01:52:44.840 sorts, sorts things out. Like however you want to look at that, you know, but I've seen
01:52:48.840 it pop up repeatedly in my life and just, you know, other people that wanted to be judgmental,
01:52:55.580 you know, cause we just, we all, it makes us feel better to some degree to be able to
01:52:59.040 just blame other people for, you know, something that is not going right, you know, in our own 0.99
01:53:04.420 lives, but you know, it's bullshit. Life just gone life, man. 0.99
01:53:07.900 Yeah. And it's interesting, like you said, in the beginning, like if you could look at
01:53:11.640 life through a whole spectrum of time, it's unfortunate. We're only able to see life a
01:53:16.420 lot of times, but a lot of us are just as right now, we're not able to see the past 3000 years.
01:53:22.720 We're not able to see it. It's always right now.
01:53:24.960 Right. And if we could get a whole, if we could really spend life like this and look at the
01:53:29.620 spectrum of things, it would give us all a unique perspective. And maybe that's the perspective
01:53:33.800 that's coming along in the future, like you were saying. Yeah. Cause I think even like
01:53:37.400 when I was talking about like visiting battlefields of old battles and stuff, I think there's obviously
01:53:42.120 becomes like a sicko element to it. They just go back and just like, they're just there with
01:53:47.060 like this hot chick or something. You know what I mean? I'm going to take this broad out to 1.00
01:53:51.500 the, uh, to the Ying dynasty or something. Now this joke is going to figure out, not even that
01:53:56.020 though, but like people going back in time, like jerking off. Yeah. Type shit. Oh, dang, 0.99
01:54:05.480 bro. That's going to be sad, man. But that's just humans, man. But you're going to have some
01:54:09.940 dude going back. The ultimate beauty humans, humans, we encompass the ultimate beauty, you
01:54:15.240 know what I'm saying? Like in the ultimate fucking ugliness, man, it's like, you know, our greatest 0.95
01:54:20.600 gift is probably like if, if you were some like evolved, like alien species, you know what I'm 0.98
01:54:26.180 saying? Look, just looking at us, you'd be so envious of the fact that we can feel the way we
01:54:31.660 feel. Cause if you'd evolved to a point where we can't even feel, yeah, you don't have, there's no
01:54:36.840 love. There's no emotion in you. It's all just like logic and survival. You know what I'm saying?
01:54:42.200 Yeah. Imagine the alien comes back just to see like a mother hug a child. Yeah. Or to see somebody
01:54:47.940 crying because their girlfriend broke up with them. Yeah. And they can't even have
01:54:51.040 tears. And they've actually evolved into just being one gender and they, they like spawn every 1.00
01:54:55.880 spring. And that's how the new, you know, the new, the gene pool, like that's how the
01:55:00.140 new, new booty, new people come. Yeah. Like, so there's no, it's just one gender. Like it 1.00
01:55:05.440 evolved into that. Like that's ultimately what it feels like we're kind of being prompted
01:55:09.000 towards, you know, but, um, somebody come all the way back in time just to see a breast 0.99
01:55:13.680 or a, somebody's dick. Yeah. Cause they don't have it. Just envious of just like, but also 1.00
01:55:19.460 like, man, y'all are stupid as hell. Yeah. You know what I mean? Y'all feel shit. Why 1.00
01:55:24.320 y'all want to feel shit? Y'all still feeling? Yeah. Damn, y'all, that's so played out. Man. 1.00
01:55:29.020 Look at these people still feeling. That's why y'all keep damn blowing up shit and doing 1.00
01:55:32.760 everything is y'all being y'all's feelings and shit, you know? So there's something to be said 0.99
01:55:36.660 for, you know, you couldn't imagine a life without emotion and feelings and cause it kind
01:55:41.060 of what drives us, you know what I'm saying? But I mean, it's, it's, it's, it's just the
01:55:46.500 double-edged sword that pretty much comes along with anything. If you think about it. Like,
01:55:50.860 dude, I think, uh, you have such a, I just am fascinated by your perspective, man. The,
01:55:57.240 the perspectives you've been able to live through and the perspective that you've been able to,
01:56:01.920 uh, um, not create for yourself, but, uh, learn and evolve into as you've, as you've, uh,
01:56:12.220 grown around. I don't rule anything out, man. And I, and I just, I, I'm teachable. You know
01:56:17.240 what I'm saying? That's one thing that I, I committed to, to always just be coachable and
01:56:20.720 teachable because please present me with some, I beg anyone out there, present me with some
01:56:26.040 new information that either improves upon some bad or dated information that I'm using. You know
01:56:32.680 what I'm saying? Like, please give me some new information. If my information's wrong,
01:56:37.500 I welcome it. I encourage it. I need it. You know what I'm saying? So, and, and sometimes it may not
01:56:42.540 come from the people that you would want it to come from and the way you would want it to come,
01:56:46.300 but Hey, I can't tell help how to help me. You know what I'm saying? Like, so, you know,
01:56:51.080 and that's just, and it's just about, I just wish more people would just be unconditionally
01:56:55.340 open-minded, you know, because man, it's just, I, you know, I, I got into astrology recently,
01:57:01.820 you know, or in the past couple of years and really started learning more about it. Even
01:57:06.580 though for most of my life, I was like, you know, whatever. I just use it as a way to pick
01:57:10.600 up girls. What's your son? What's your son? Or look at that. A conversation starter, but
01:57:15.340 it's starting to make sense to me that in the future, it could be certain aspects of astrology
01:57:23.700 could be looked at as science because it only makes sense to me that now, if you were born
01:57:28.600 at a certain time of year, in a certain place, the air pressure was, you know, this at that
01:57:34.220 time, the humidity level, like all these things that we may not know, they could have a major
01:57:39.720 impact on, on the way a human mind and body and spirit develops. You know, I just think
01:57:46.960 that it's, that it's going to be in the future at some point, it's going to be a lot more
01:57:50.980 credence to stuff like that. You know what I'm saying? Like, and, and I think whereas
01:57:54.940 religion, not religion, I don't even, religion is just some man made, in my opinion, just
01:58:01.980 something that man made as a way to, you know, to try and connect to a higher power.
01:58:08.300 Yeah. But, but, but I don't even think it was that I think man can connect to a higher
01:58:13.320 power by himself, you know, or by herself. But I think in some ways, religion was just
01:58:19.600 to control people. You know what I'm saying? It's like, um, when you look at like various
01:58:25.600 religious institutions, I mean, it's hard to say that I, what did they say in that movie?
01:58:32.660 The, um, the Da Vinci Code or something like that.
01:58:36.360 Oh yeah, I just watched that.
01:58:37.320 Well, he was like, he was like, um, asked the guy about God and he said, no, don't tell
01:58:42.460 me what, what man has told you about God. Tell me what you think about God. You know what I'm
01:58:47.880 saying? And it's like, man, it's like any, anything I'm told by a man, I'm just, I'm
01:58:53.360 just no men are flawed. You know what I'm saying? Men and women are very flawed. So, you know,
01:58:58.200 who knows what kind of bullshit might be attached to, you know, the reason that they're telling 0.98
01:59:02.140 me this, you know, and that's not to say that I'm just would rule it out, but it's just 0.97
01:59:06.040 to say, I can't just accept it as just what it is, as my concrete fundamental truth, you know,
01:59:11.720 but, you know, religion's helped a lot of people, you know what I'm saying? And, you
01:59:15.800 know, my, I come, my mother and father are Christian, you know, and I, and I, I'm a Christian,
01:59:20.580 I would say, you know what I'm saying? But, um, I'm just not going to just, you ain't going
01:59:26.540 to just piss down my back, tell me it's rain and me be like, okay, no, it's rain. You
01:59:30.060 know, I'm going to investigate things for myself. I'm going to think for myself.
01:59:33.640 Oh yeah. Some of that's piss. 0.96
01:59:35.060 Yeah, for sure.
01:59:36.340 Yeah.
01:59:36.540 Yeah, it's warm. And why three y'all standing back there, man? Why three or four y'all
01:59:43.660 I know y'all been drinking damn beer all day. Like y'all ain't got out the pool one 0.97
01:59:47.480 time, bro. I've got, you and Riff Raff got to get together and talk, man. I would listen
01:59:53.760 to that for hours.
01:59:54.900 Oh, I love to talk to him, man.
01:59:56.220 Y'all sound so much like the same.
01:59:58.040 We got to get up, man. For real.
01:59:59.820 Dude. Uh, yeah, I just, uh, I feel so grateful to have gotten to spend time with you and, um,
02:00:04.920 yeah, it means a lot, man, that we finally got to do this cause it's a long time coming
02:00:08.860 for sure.
02:00:09.600 Yeah. We should go have something y'all going to eat or something.
02:00:11.880 Yeah. We'd love to get something to eat.
02:00:13.080 We'll go right down the street. If you want to check out more music, what else is, what
02:00:16.340 else can we, they expect? What's going on?
02:00:18.260 I mean, honestly, I've, I've put out music with the exception of the two years that I was,
02:00:22.960 that I was talking about, which really set me back. Cause that was at a time when the
02:00:26.320 internet was starting to dictate, um, music, musical styles and trends evolving at a much
02:00:31.800 more rapid rate. So, and that was like the worst time to take two years off. So it took
02:00:36.600 me a while to just get caught up. And, and I honestly, I feel like I'm better now than
02:00:40.540 I've ever been. You know, I was blessed to work with some really great producers early
02:00:43.760 on. And, and so I was good, you know, always, but I benefited from working with some great
02:00:49.600 people, you know what I'm saying? Whereas now I'm kind of like able to be a more self
02:00:53.700 contained entity, you know, almost I can go in the studio by myself and, and, and
02:00:58.760 right ahead. You know what I'm saying? Like every aspect of it. But, um, I'm putting
02:01:03.400 out music pretty consistently, man. Like I'm about to, I'll get kind of like in a lull
02:01:08.300 for a year or so, you know, maybe do some other stuff and then just at some point I'm
02:01:13.600 gonna get riled back up on it, man. Cause it just calls me, you know what I'm saying?
02:01:17.080 It's, it's, it's that real to me. And you know, you're fortunate as long as I'm breathing
02:01:21.980 on this planet, if you, if you like listening to my music, if it just doesn't make you
02:01:26.960 vomit, you know what I'm saying? I, the good news is I'm, as long as I'm breathing,
02:01:31.440 as long as my mental faculties will allow me to do so, I'm going to be rapping.
02:01:35.620 Are there other, uh, yeah, cause there's no one that sound, there is no one still that
02:01:42.420 sounds like you. I was listening to a bunch of your music this week and there was, uh,
02:01:46.440 there's, I can't even explain it. And I don't think it needs to be explained. That's
02:01:50.460 why.
02:01:51.060 Well, you know, man, it's like what I like about the way you do your thing, man, is it's like
02:01:54.920 the, honestly, the first episode I ever saw was Boosie.
02:02:00.020 Oh yeah.
02:02:01.000 And it was just dope, man. I was like, well, this is weird to me. Like, why is, like, this
02:02:05.560 is just strange to me. And then you started talking and realizing from Baton Rouge, like
02:02:08.940 everything. And I was like, this is fucking new South as fuck, man. This is like dope 1.00
02:02:14.280 as hell. You know what I'm saying? And I started getting into just the, the authentic
02:02:17.520 way because look, every person that's ever been born into this world has something unique
02:02:22.700 about them that sets them apart from every other person that's ever been born into this
02:02:26.920 world. You know what I'm saying? We all have something in us that just separates us from
02:02:31.500 everybody else. Doesn't make us better or worse. Just makes us us. And to me, great art, whether
02:02:36.820 you're a quarterback, a painter, you know, a musician, a comedian, great art is about the
02:02:43.760 ability to make whatever it is that makes you unique and different from everybody else and
02:02:47.800 special translate into your art. You know what I'm saying? And, and so I just really get
02:02:52.220 off when I, when I encounter people or when, when I'm able to observe cats that, that are
02:02:57.720 doing that, you know what I'm saying? It's like, dang, man, like nobody can compete with
02:03:01.020 that. You know what I'm saying? If you just truly like get in your own lane and keep the,
02:03:05.940 even the attempt to compete with it is a loss, you know what I'm saying? It's like, you know,
02:03:10.380 you just can't be another person, you know? And we're all inspired and influenced by, by
02:03:14.600 others. That's not to say, you know, I have influences, many influences. I get influenced
02:03:20.160 by things every day and I, and I'm not scared to, like I said, acknowledge that. Give me
02:03:24.180 some new information, like, you know, inspire me in a different way, whatever. Yeah. But
02:03:28.000 to really be, it's, that's the scariest thing I think is to try and be yourself. And that's
02:03:34.240 so fascinating. Yeah. So, so when you do finally learn who you really are and embrace it and
02:03:40.220 accept it, you cherish it, man. You know what I'm saying? You cherish it. Like, and, and
02:03:45.280 you definitely, I, I'm, I'm sympathetic and empathetic to people that, that haven't been
02:03:49.840 able to, to, to discover themselves or, or embrace, you know, who they truly are. Because
02:03:54.560 I know people out here that can't, that haven't been able to do it for themselves. So they,
02:04:00.180 they, they, uh, vent that, that angst from not being able to figure it out for themselves
02:04:05.340 by, you know, judging and throwing stones at other people, you know, that, and that's just
02:04:10.580 the way it's going to go, man. You know, it's just hurt people, hurt people, but lost people
02:04:16.140 get people lost. Yeah. I would love to see you. I feel like you have such a calling to
02:04:23.140 be able to just, I mean, you always, you're already doing it, but your ability to communicate,
02:04:27.040 man, is really strong. And it's not a, I didn't know, I didn't have a super strong idea of what
02:04:33.420 you would be like as a human outside of what I've seen of you or heard of your music. I've done a pretty
02:04:37.600 bad job, honestly, of just, you know, I've, I've kind of hidden, you know, it's been, it's been a
02:04:44.840 rough, you know, like I'd say last five years and I was, you know, us being, you know, the way we are
02:04:52.160 as, as, you know, addicts or, or whatever it is that we're saddled with or blessed with, however
02:04:58.720 you want to look at that. We isolate, you know what I mean? Oh yeah, man. You know, and I, I get away
02:05:03.820 from, from people and places and things or anything that could potentially cause more discomfort,
02:05:09.820 you know, that, that gnawing self-centered fear, that fear of nothing in particular is just like,
02:05:15.220 if I go out there, I'm going to melt, you know, like just baseless. But yeah. And I, and I'm,
02:05:21.500 and you know, I got some, some good people I work with, Charlie, you know, it's also a brother of
02:05:26.000 mine, my boy, Boogie Jason, like just people that are some good people around me, man. When,
02:05:30.880 um, when not necessarily, some people left me, a lot of people left, some were justified, some
02:05:36.860 weren't. Um, but there were also a lot of people that I walked away from, you know what I'm saying?
02:05:42.660 I withdrew from everything and everybody at a certain point. And so the people that were still
02:05:48.400 around me, like, and they weren't, that's not something they signed up for, you know what I'm
02:05:52.800 saying? To, to be, to have this responsibility of fucking like salvaging or trying to get, 0.84
02:05:58.440 you know what I mean? Oh yeah. Yeah. We're confusing folks, man. You know? And it's like, 0.98
02:06:02.360 and it's like, all I can ever promise somebody like that is the goods going out way to bad,
02:06:07.640 but you know, it's, it's, um, I just been blessed, man. Like that man sitting over there,
02:06:12.140 man, I would not be here on this planet breathing. Really? He saved you a couple of times,
02:06:16.580 huh? I mean, not like, not like literally, no, but just, you know what I'm saying? Like
02:06:20.820 just, there was nobody else. Yeah. There was just nobody else. He was just ended up, you
02:06:26.780 know, with that baton. Um, and it's sad cause I don't know sometimes if I could do that is
02:06:32.560 if I'm real, I don't, I don't know if I could love somebody that, you know, cares. Oh, he
02:06:36.020 didn't. I mean, trust me, he didn't want to. Like he, I think he at certain times, you know what
02:06:41.020 I'm saying? Like we done been into it, you know? And, and, uh, but he, you know, he ain't perfect
02:06:45.440 either. You know what I'm saying? So it's like sometimes, sometimes the quote unquote sick one
02:06:50.180 can, you know, can, yeah. Yeah. The sick one gotta be there for the sick one. Yeah. You know,
02:06:55.320 cause we all just some old stupid ass human motherfuckers, man. I'll tell you this. I won't 1.00
02:07:01.480 listen to well people a lot of times. I can only hear. That's not like somebody that's bullshitting
02:07:06.500 to me, like a well person. Yeah. I got to hear from somebody that's sick. We were talking about
02:07:12.240 that last night. We were talking about how, you know, just that therapeutic value, you know, of,
02:07:15.880 of one act helping another. Like when you know, somebody has been through that shit, you know, 0.99
02:07:20.040 the same, you know, and, and, and just attraction over promotion, you know, just, we were just 0.97
02:07:25.020 talking about all these, these different principles and concepts and, and, uh, yeah, I can, I can, you know,
02:07:30.520 God bless anybody that's, this, that's coming from a good place and trying to help, but I really can only
02:07:37.200 be helped by somebody that I, that can relate, you know, cause I've just, you know, we just feel
02:07:43.680 like terminally unique and was it terminally unique and fatally cool or something like that. Like
02:07:49.520 basically like I, I've, as I've always felt like not, did they just, I couldn't just relate to, to
02:07:58.520 people that, that just hadn't experienced like a, and we all experienced pain. That's not what I'm
02:08:04.400 saying. But it's almost like somebody that's like would inflict pain on themselves. Like we do,
02:08:09.600 you know what I'm saying? It's like, you know, yeah, I'm a superior, I'm a superstar with an
02:08:13.960 inferiority complex. I mean, I'm a people pleaser that don't give a fuck when nobody thinks about 0.98
02:08:17.840 me. That's the real deal. But the egomaniac with the inferiority complex, egomaniac, the inferiority 0.98
02:08:24.380 complex, man. Just a crazy sumbitch. A lot of us are out there, man. And a lot of us don't even know 1.00
02:08:29.560 that we have this, that, you know, that they, that they have some element of it. You know,
02:08:33.620 my old sponsor again used to say that he was the people that pick up the drug or the drink or
02:08:40.760 whatever. They're the blessed ones because that gets us that much closer to the solution, whether
02:08:44.980 we pick it up or not. But some people go through their whole lives and they never find the thing
02:08:50.120 that brings everything to a head where they do identify the fact that they got some shit wrong 0.89
02:08:54.940 with them. You know what I'm saying? So they just go through their lives red, restless, irritable, 0.91
02:08:58.440 and discontent and no idea why. You know what I'm saying? God, that is a, that is almost like a hell.
02:09:05.160 Yeah. I mean, I know, I know some, some people very close to me, I would say they fall into that
02:09:10.420 category and there's just nothing. And they'll talk at you all day about, you know what I mean? Like,
02:09:17.080 you know, you just got to be strong and all this stuff, you know, but it's like,
02:09:20.140 I'm just sitting there seeing the quote unquote disease, like all manifest itself in that person's
02:09:26.380 life. And, and that's just not even a conversation they're willing because they attach it to the
02:09:30.960 drug. You know what I'm saying? Right. You know what I mean? Well, really, that's just a symptom.
02:09:34.880 You know what I'm saying? The product is the, it's the us problem. You know what I'm saying?
02:09:38.180 Oh, I never had an issue with drinking, man. I never, I like, I didn't like drinking. I had to go pee.
02:09:43.080 Like we probably all have to right now. I had to go pee, bro. And I hated having to go pee because I didn't want
02:09:48.740 to miss being around people. Right. And so I never liked drinking, man. Wow. Now I liked something,
02:09:53.440 I did start to like cocaine because it, and drinking was, it took too long to feel some type
02:09:58.980 way. I wanted to, cocaine, it was like, you could feel this, you could feel this. And that hangover
02:10:02.560 is awful though. Oh yeah, it was horrible, but I never, so it took me so long to realize that I had
02:10:07.860 all these alcoholisms, that I had all this restless irritable. I, self and me. Yeah. It took,
02:10:13.900 because there was no, like, it was so hard to pin the tail on the donkey, man. Yeah.
02:10:18.220 Um, cause you want to attach it to a certain substance or something, you know, really it's
02:10:22.580 just, that's your solution for a while. You know what I'm saying? Whatever you pick up that,
02:10:27.920 that gambling, that food is at first it's your solution. It, it quiets the, the beast. You
02:10:34.600 know what I'm saying? Yeah. Cause I don't want to sit here with myself. I don't want to sit in the
02:10:37.940 fucking moment, bro. Because at some point in my life when I was a kid or a baby or whatever, 0.99
02:10:42.380 the moment wasn't, it wasn't good for me. Right. So it was not a safe place to be.
02:10:48.700 So anything that keeps me, cause the moment can see you clearly. The moment is a fucking 0.98
02:10:54.780 mirror, you know? And I don't want to be right there, man. Cause I don't, you know, I mean, 0.99
02:10:59.900 we could go all day about it. I literally just thought that made me break out of sweat.
02:11:03.600 We could go all, we could go all day about it, man. No doubt, man.
02:11:06.140 But look, man, I'd love to chat again sometime. And I just think you have such a, uh, I'm
02:11:11.700 great. I feel grateful to have heard some of the things you said today. And I mean that
02:11:15.200 I appreciate that. And, um, and I'm glad that, you know, we don't, you don't need
02:11:18.820 isolate cause we need you. Thank you, man. Thank you for real Theo. Thank you for giving
02:11:25.460 me this opportunity. Oh yeah, dude, you, you coming in, man. I've had so many people that
02:11:29.300 were so excited, bro. So it's a blessing, man. You know, cause you know, that's another
02:11:33.240 thing too, is just, you know, in your head, you're like, I don't know about it. I got
02:11:36.480 this thing where I think people, when I, at my shows that people pay just cause they hate
02:11:40.980 me, like it's, it's sickness, you know what I'm saying? Utter sickness. So I don't think
02:11:45.420 nobody gives a damn what I got to say or nothing, you know, that's just where it takes me. You
02:11:49.480 know what I'm saying? But it's good. It's good to hear that. And it's good to hear you say
02:11:53.360 all those kind of things. Yeah, man. I just think because there's not, you, there's no
02:12:00.760 other you, man. Like you said a minute ago, there's no, I mean, I look, man, I was listening
02:12:06.260 to some of your verses a couple of days ago and it's like, nobody has whatever this is. 0.75
02:12:12.000 Now they have different versions of it and shit and they got newer and older versions.
02:12:15.840 And they got some things I don't have. Right. Agreed. Yeah. But, but I got some, I mean, 0.95
02:12:20.040 you know, it was, yeah. I mean, you know, I, I, I, Hey, I'm blessed, you know, and we
02:12:24.840 all are, you know what I'm saying? That's the, that's the unique, that's the great thing
02:12:29.160 about, you know, the, the way humans are set up where our accounts are set up, you know,
02:12:34.460 it's like, man, if you just, we all got some qualities, man, that can, that can be redeemable.
02:12:39.820 You know what I'm saying? It can, we just got to, you know, what we feed will flourish
02:12:44.640 and what we starve will die in our own spirits. Yeah, man. I got to, uh, I got to start feeding
02:12:51.980 the good spots, man. We all do. We, we all got to, you know what I'm saying? That's
02:12:55.720 got to be vigilant as far as that goes. I damn sure I'll tell myself a fucked up story 0.99
02:13:00.400 and what they say, whatever story you're telling yourself is true. You know? So, um, 0.99
02:13:05.760 I know when I get tired of living my old story, man, that's what I, you know, I get tired.
02:13:10.560 Sometimes I start to realize, man, is this, you know, whether it was your story or whether
02:13:15.500 it was your truth or not growing up, how long you want to keep telling yourself that just
02:13:20.320 because of what it makes you feel like today? This is just who you are. This is just what
02:13:23.940 it is. You know what I'm saying? That's the big, you know, that's the biggest cop out,
02:13:27.460 you know, and I, and I'm very guilty of it. You know what I'm saying? It's resignation
02:13:30.760 almost, but it's like, but it's hard when it's giving you also the, the flint and the
02:13:36.180 steel. Cause you feel like you're going to lose it all. Yeah. You know what I mean? If I,
02:13:39.780 if I, if I, if I diminish any aspect of it, then it's all gone. If I don't have my story,
02:13:45.600 then who the fuck even am I? And it's kind of, it's kind of happened to me like 0.96
02:13:48.740 that before too. Like I just, I'd rather die than I'd rather keep going way beyond
02:13:54.060 the gates of insanity and hell than just sit there mundane and just like, that ain't
02:13:59.260 it, bro. Like that's not, you know, and, and like I said, sometimes maybe I didn't
02:14:04.920 put in enough work, you know what I'm saying? Inside the, you know, the program,
02:14:08.600 whatever, you know what I'm saying? And so I didn't ever reach that point where I
02:14:12.560 could feel that peace and that freedom and, and still have my good shit. And then it's 0.98
02:14:17.720 an ongoing process even from there. It's not like it just, it just happens one
02:14:20.940 day and you're just like, Oh, I'm good now.
02:14:22.860 No, then it's an ongoing process too. And it's like, how much do I want to take
02:14:26.520 care of myself? Cause there's a part of me that don't ever want to take care of
02:14:29.100 myself. Cause it ain't even my fucking job to do it. And that's the part too, 0.98
02:14:32.700 inside of me sometimes that, uh, this is somebody else's job. Why do I have to do it
02:14:38.360 every day? You know, I still think like that sometimes. And some of that shit's hard to
02:14:42.340 kill, bro. Um, but I felt like I was in nine meetings today, man. 1.00
02:14:47.080 No, that's what I feel like too, bro. I really do. I feel like that too, man.
02:14:49.920 And I've been in the program for five and a half years, six years. And I've only,
02:14:52.960 I'm still on, I just got to step nine two days ago.
02:14:55.940 That's crazy. So we'll see, you know, the, the particular fellowship I was in,
02:14:59.860 like they, just the steps are worked slower, you know what I'm saying? You know,
02:15:04.460 uh, with the workbook and stuff. And, and, uh, that's the fellowship I prefer, but I
02:15:09.580 know like, you know, some of those, some in other fellowships, you know what I'm
02:15:14.060 saying? Like they, like, you know how they used to do in the old days, like you
02:15:17.300 worked all 12 steps over the weekend, you know what I mean? But, um,
02:15:21.620 yeah, you hear stories about that.
02:15:23.160 Yeah. I mean, you know, cause it's, it, when you break it down to its simplest form,
02:15:27.360 you know, what, what the, the, the steps are actually trying to accomplish. Um,
02:15:31.360 it, it, it's really not that complex a process, you know what I'm saying? It's
02:15:35.120 just, um, you know, cleaning up and, you know, and, and, um,
02:15:41.860 Yeah. Trusting in God.
02:15:43.220 Yeah.
02:15:43.740 Cleaning house.
02:15:44.740 Cleaning house, you know, doing, taking a real, realistic inventory of yourself,
02:15:49.220 trying to make amends for the wrong you've done, you know, and, and then trying to
02:15:53.440 help other people.
02:15:54.220 That's it.
02:15:54.700 That's it.
02:15:55.500 Well, you helped me today, Bubba Sparks. Thanks so much for spending time, bro.
02:15:58.200 Thank you, Theo. Much love, brother.
02:16:00.000 Gang baby.
02:16:00.360 Hey man, tell Riff Raff, I'm, I'm only, I'm looking for him.
02:16:03.260 I'm going to send him this link, man. He'll fucking love it. He'll love it, bro. 0.95
02:16:06.420 He's one of us. Hey, look, he loved to hear his name, you know,
02:16:09.380 he loved to hear people care about him. He's one of us.
02:16:10.980 Man, there's no, it's just, it's a joke that me and him hadn't, you know,
02:16:14.360 that we hadn't, uh, connected already because I know we got several mutual friends and stuff, so.
02:16:19.740 Yeah, y'all have to, man. Thanks again, bro.
02:16:21.440 Much love, Theo.
02:16:22.060 Now I'm just floating on the breeze, and I feel I'm falling like these leaves I must be.
02:16:29.280 Cornerstone.
02:16:32.180 Oh, but when I reach that ground, I'll share this peace of mind I found.
02:16:39.020 Ladies and gentlemen, I'm Jonathan Kite, and welcome to Kite Club, a podcast where I'll be
02:16:52.840 sharing thoughts on things like current events, stand-up stories, and seven ways to pleasure
02:16:57.700 your partner. The answer may shock you.
02:17:00.260 Sometimes I'll interview my friends. Sometimes I won't. And as always, I'll be joined by the
02:17:06.140 voices in my head.
02:17:07.380 You have three new voice messages.
02:17:10.360 A lot of people are talking about Kite Club. I've been talking about Kite Club for so long,
02:17:15.960 longer than anybody else. So great.
02:17:18.940 Hi, sweetheart. Here's the deal. Anyone who doesn't listen to Kite Club is a dodgy bloody wanker. 0.98
02:17:25.520 I think Tom Hanks just butt-dialed me. 0.99
02:17:37.760 Anyway, first rule of Kite Club is, tell everyone about Kite Club. Second rule of Kite Club is,
02:17:43.920 tell everyone about Kite Club. Third rule, like and subscribe wherever you listen to podcasts,
02:17:49.780 or watch us on YouTube, yeah?
02:17:51.480 And yes, don't worry. My Brad Pitt impression will get better.