This Past Weekend with Theo Von - E517 Andrew Santino

00:00:00.000 We hope you're enjoying your Air Canada flight.

00:00:02.320 Rocky's Vacation, here we come.

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00:00:10.720 Fast-free Wi-Fi means I can make dinner reservations before we land.

00:00:14.760 And with live TV, I'm not missing the game.

00:00:17.800 It's kind of like, I'm already on vacation.

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00:00:22.140 On behalf of Air Canada, nice travels.

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00:00:28.580 See AirCanada.com.

00:00:30.120 I've got some tour dates to tell you about Bethel, New York.

00:00:34.700 Wallingford, Connecticut.

00:00:36.500 Portland, Maine.

00:00:37.580 Bangor, Maine.

00:00:39.540 Moncton, Canada.

00:00:41.180 Las Vegas, Nevada.

00:00:42.740 We're coming back during the LSU-USC football game weekend.

00:00:48.240 That's August 30th and 31st.

00:00:50.640 Oklahoma City.

00:00:52.420 North Little Rock.

00:00:53.920 Finally getting there to Arkansas.

00:00:55.380 And looking forward to that, baby.

00:00:57.460 Praise God, man.

00:00:59.840 Springfield, Missouri.

00:01:00.820 Kansas City, Missouri.

00:01:01.840 Sioux Falls.

00:01:03.300 South Dakota.

00:01:05.180 La Crosse, Wisconsin.

00:01:06.400 Green Bay, Wisconsin.

00:01:07.340 And Moline, Illinois.

00:01:08.660 All tickets are through TheoVaughn.com.

00:01:11.620 Slash T-O-U-R. 1.00

00:01:13.860 And thank you so much for supporting Live Comedy.

00:01:17.980 Today's guest is a stand-up comedian.

00:01:20.240 He's a podcaster.

00:01:22.360 He's my friend.

00:01:23.980 And I'm just really grateful that he's coming in today.

00:01:27.060 You know him from his podcast, Whiskey, Ginger, and Bad Friends.

00:01:32.860 He's got a bunch of new tour dates coming up for his fall tour.

00:01:36.560 I'm grateful to spend time today with Mr. Andrew Santino.

00:01:41.560 Shine that light on me.

00:01:47.420 I'll sit and tell you my stories.

00:01:52.560 Shine on me.

00:01:57.200 And I will find a song I've been singing.

00:02:01.300 I love this.

00:02:02.020 And now I've been moving away. 1.00

00:02:09.760 Fucking Fitzsimmons. 0.99

00:02:11.260 Greg Fitzsimmons? 1.00

00:02:12.480 What's wrong with him?

00:02:13.340 He's finally coming out.

00:02:14.780 No.

00:02:15.380 After all these years, because I'm sick.

00:02:16.820 I don't want to hide it anymore.

00:02:18.900 I'm tired.

00:02:20.060 Dude, I went to dinner with a buddy of mine the other day.

00:02:23.460 Came out of the closet.

00:02:25.540 At dinner?

00:02:26.020 Yeah, before we even ordered appetizers.

00:02:28.100 I'm like...

00:02:28.740 Let me get something in my belly first before I hear that kind of news.

00:02:31.200 Well, let me get something in my mouth if you've had something in yours.

00:02:34.280 You know what I'm saying?

00:02:34.760 That's how I know.

00:02:35.900 It's like...

00:02:36.860 Because there was nothing to do.

00:02:39.460 I didn't realize how nervous I would get if somebody was like... 0.77

00:02:42.600 I guess like immediately gay in front of me. 0.98

00:02:45.180 Or like they...

00:02:45.740 It was like a...

00:02:46.660 I don't know if it's called like revealing.

00:02:48.440 It's called a surprise. 0.99

00:02:49.680 Yeah, surprise gay. 1.00

00:02:50.920 Surprise, I'm gay. 0.94

00:02:51.960 Yeah.

00:02:52.660 But is it a surprise?

00:02:53.720 Because we usually know.

00:02:55.400 We almost always know.

00:02:56.600 You don't have a good...

00:02:57.400 This I had no idea.

00:02:59.000 I have a really good gaydar.

00:03:00.320 Really?

00:03:01.200 Really good. 0.81

00:03:02.020 My uncle used to get the hiccups if somebody was gay around him. 1.00

00:03:04.900 Right, yeah. 0.98

00:03:05.420 You get congested.

00:03:06.820 He just couldn't handle it.

00:03:08.220 I think there was something inside of him.

00:03:10.660 The Lord, maybe. 0.98

00:03:11.740 And you'd see him start to fucking kind of bubble up a little. 1.00

00:03:14.140 Like a fucking... 0.99

00:03:15.200 Like he was made out of champagne, you know? 1.00

00:03:16.880 Just...

00:03:17.440 You know? 0.77

00:03:18.500 Dude, the crazy...

00:03:19.480 Here was the crazy part though, dude.

00:03:21.880 Uh, years later, it's just, uh, he got started getting around his son and then he started 1.00

00:03:27.420 fucking losing his mind. 0.99

00:03:28.740 He thought his son was, uh, gay. 1.00

00:03:31.460 And he wasn't.

00:03:32.920 We don't know.

00:03:34.620 We don't know.

00:03:35.600 We don't know.

00:03:36.520 You know, at higher altitudes, I think people...

00:03:38.380 There's more gay people at higher altitudes.

00:03:40.200 Can you look that up?

00:03:42.760 I think there might be.

00:03:44.280 Well, that...

00:03:44.920 It does make sense.

00:03:47.100 They...

00:03:47.500 They're more exposed.

00:03:49.280 Yeah.

00:03:49.520 Higher altitudes.

00:03:51.080 Wow.

00:03:51.900 People at higher altitudes have more...

00:03:53.580 Yeah, right.

00:03:55.420 Wow.

00:03:56.060 You know, it says who should not go to high altitudes.

00:03:58.200 Is it... 0.98

00:03:59.000 Should gay people go to high altitudes or no? 1.00

00:04:01.580 Well, it says sickle cell, so brothers aren't allowed up there. 0.99

00:04:04.120 Yeah, no way.

00:04:06.000 Um...

00:04:06.280 But you know, that's probably...

00:04:07.040 It's closer to God.

00:04:08.420 So, you know, you're up there.

00:04:11.140 You gotta be careful.

00:04:12.120 He likes who he likes.

00:04:13.160 That's right.

00:04:13.700 That's all we're saying, dude.

00:04:15.440 Andrew, thanks for coming in, dude.

00:04:17.800 Thank you, man.

00:04:18.380 It's been a minute.

00:04:19.040 Really, really appreciate it, bro.

00:04:20.620 Congrats on Bad Friends, all the success you guys have had.

00:04:23.520 Thank you, man.

00:04:24.000 Ditto.

00:04:24.380 I miss you.

00:04:24.880 I miss you ever since you went to Nashville.

00:04:27.540 We miss you like crazy.

00:04:29.340 We talk about you like you're gone.

00:04:30.820 You're not dead, but you're gone.

00:04:32.160 Yeah.

00:04:32.380 We just don't see you as much.

00:04:33.420 It's different.

00:04:34.280 I know.

00:04:34.760 It's a lot different, man.

00:04:36.240 Yeah, how's it felt like...

00:04:38.360 What is the comedy scene like?

00:04:39.680 Because you've been here the whole time.

00:04:41.260 I know you had thought about maybe moving.

00:04:42.780 You had thought about...

00:04:43.540 You went to New York for a little bit.

00:04:44.780 Yeah, and I don't want to...

00:04:46.420 I'm not going to go anywhere.

00:04:47.940 Oh, thanks, brother.

00:04:48.880 This guy.

00:04:50.800 Is it too hot?

00:04:51.560 You want to check it first?

00:04:52.260 No, it's fine.

00:04:52.960 But I'll throw it on him.

00:04:53.920 Come here for a second.

00:04:55.780 No, if I...

00:04:57.340 No, I'm good here, man.

00:04:58.820 I like it here.

00:04:59.780 LA is...

00:05:02.260 The comedy scene is good.

00:05:06.360 It just got shaken up,

00:05:08.100 and then so now it's back to humming again.

00:05:11.200 Everything kind of feels a little bit smoother.

00:05:13.260 But for a while it was like,

00:05:14.820 everyone's gone,

00:05:15.600 everything disappeared,

00:05:16.440 everything got quiet.

00:05:17.700 Now I think it's like leveling out.

00:05:19.320 Yeah.

00:05:19.640 You know, it's like if you're panning for a goal, 0.99

00:05:21.560 you got to shake some of the shit out. 0.99

00:05:23.240 Oh, yeah. 0.99

00:05:23.880 And I think also it probably creates a lot more stage time

00:05:26.120 because, I mean,

00:05:27.100 it was hard for, like,

00:05:30.600 Joe, Tom.

00:05:32.400 I mean, we kind of were coming up, like,

00:05:34.020 after them a little bit.

00:05:35.080 Oh, yeah, big time.

00:05:35.780 And it was tough for us to get, you know, like...

00:05:38.380 Consistent, yeah.

00:05:39.460 Right, as much as you, you know, like, they...

00:05:42.160 And so that's just the cycle of it, I guess.

00:05:44.880 Yeah, but you never had a thought to go to Austin, right?

00:05:46.980 You were never going to move down there.

00:05:48.060 I thought about it.

00:05:49.280 And I'm still thinking about maybe getting a place there.

00:05:52.760 Yeah.

00:05:53.300 Yeah, just because I went down there for two weeks,

00:05:56.480 and I picked up eight new minutes.

00:05:59.120 Yeah, it was great.

00:05:59.940 And it was like, I need this.

00:06:02.420 But do you like barbecue?

00:06:04.700 I don't.

00:06:05.340 I mean, not as...

00:06:07.300 Tim Dillon, he didn't like it, remember?

00:06:09.780 That was his big thing. 1.00

00:06:10.800 He's like, fuck the barbecue. 1.00

00:06:12.240 Yeah, he didn't like it. 1.00

00:06:13.240 Yeah, and fuck Tulsi Gabbard. 1.00

00:06:16.160 He didn't like her. 1.00

00:06:17.260 Yeah.

00:06:17.860 Why is that?

00:06:18.580 He just throws it.

00:06:19.500 It's always a food and a politician with him, you know?

00:06:22.380 Like, oh, I hate German chocolate cake

00:06:24.480 and Pete Buttigieg, you know? 0.99

00:06:26.860 He just, he always fucking, like, 0.98

00:06:28.180 we're going to put those things together. 0.98

00:06:29.980 Yeah, Tim, also, barbecue,

00:06:31.220 even the best isn't that good.

00:06:32.260 It's food for uncivilized hicks, 0.99

00:06:33.500 lesbians, and car salesmen. 1.00

00:06:34.580 Oh, dang. 0.98

00:06:35.880 Well, I am one of those three.

00:06:39.020 I just, I never...

00:06:40.360 He's not wrong. 0.53

00:06:40.860 He's not wrong, dude.

00:06:42.100 It's not a meal that I want to eat all the time.

00:06:43.780 I think it's a hot take, but I don't like it.

00:06:47.520 Everyone talks about it like it's the best.

00:06:48.920 I feel sick afterwards.

00:06:50.120 I don't feel good.

00:06:50.660 You eat barbecue?

00:06:51.060 Yeah, I feel sick.

00:06:52.040 I don't need all that meat.

00:06:53.120 That's absurd.

00:06:54.200 What am I doing?

00:06:55.000 Oh, yeah, that's a good point.

00:06:55.880 Am I storing up for the winter?

00:06:57.160 I don't need all that beef for...

00:06:58.880 It's four pounds of meat.

00:07:00.500 I'm all right, man.

00:07:01.460 Yeah, now when you say it like that,

00:07:02.340 it really is kind of sad.

00:07:03.260 And the sauce is just so much like sugar and like...

00:07:06.500 It's sugar.

00:07:06.720 It's all sugar.

00:07:07.260 Yeah.

00:07:07.700 It's like burned sugar.

00:07:09.500 Yeah.

00:07:10.060 And they just lather burned sugar on beef. 0.88

00:07:12.100 And you have to just sit there and pretend

00:07:13.200 like your teeth don't hurt after you eat it.

00:07:15.520 I have acid reflux and my teeth hurt, dude.

00:07:17.600 I don't want to do it anymore.

00:07:19.460 It's tiring.

00:07:20.100 Bro, that should be the thing.

00:07:21.560 Which barbecue gives you the least acid reflux

00:07:24.240 in your teeth?

00:07:25.660 It stings. 1.00

00:07:29.980 Fuck, I never really thought... 1.00

00:07:32.100 It's so true. 1.00

00:07:33.580 I never really thought about that.

00:07:35.340 Because, yeah, I'll drink a sip of cold water after

00:07:37.120 and it hurts so bad.

00:07:38.000 Yeah, it stings.

00:07:38.580 Yeah, your teeth are recovering.

00:07:40.660 It's like they got in a motorcycle accident.

00:07:42.500 Yeah, they're bruised for a week or two.

00:07:47.060 Wait, somebody told me you got a bike.

00:07:48.540 Did you get a bike?

00:07:49.460 I got a...

00:07:51.540 Did you get a motorcycle?

00:07:52.500 No, no, no, no.

00:07:53.200 I got like an eight-speed.

00:07:54.260 Actually, my neighbor sold me his eight.

00:07:55.740 I guess it's about an eight-speed, yeah.

00:07:57.360 It's ten, but a couple of them are...

00:07:59.980 Well, did you pay for eight and you got ten?

00:08:01.280 Huh? 0.99

00:08:01.620 It's fucking... 1.00

00:08:02.360 It's a pretty good deal. 1.00

00:08:03.200 I don't know.

00:08:04.760 No, it's missing something.

00:08:06.080 I got to go through them again.

00:08:07.340 It's so hard to count the gear.

00:08:09.000 It's like knowing if you really have ten or whatever, 0.99

00:08:12.460 it's like who gives a fuck. 0.99

00:08:14.520 And then there's that one that's just like this, 0.98

00:08:16.320 whatever that gear is on the bike.

00:08:17.640 Yeah, that's absurd.

00:08:18.400 Like, hey, I should be juggling.

00:08:19.760 That's the queer gear. 1.00

00:08:20.340 That's the queer gear. 1.00

00:08:21.040 Yeah, yeah, yeah. 0.94

00:08:21.620 You're just kicking the air.

00:08:22.840 Hey! 0.99

00:08:24.940 Yeah, that's the meat and fellas gear.

00:08:28.520 There was always a kid growing up who could...

00:08:30.680 Who knew how to fix the chains when they fell off?

00:08:33.020 You know that kid?

00:08:33.760 That kid was such a weird, interesting dude.

00:08:35.560 If the chains were messed up on the gear switching,

00:08:38.220 he knew how to fix everything real fast.

00:08:40.580 He could replace the brake line. 0.99

00:08:42.340 Yeah, and then he'd just disappear into the fucking ether. 1.00

00:08:44.700 Yeah, he died. 1.00

00:08:45.420 That kid dies really young for no reason.

00:08:47.760 Rest in peace.

00:08:48.620 R.I.P.

00:08:49.280 R.I.P.

00:08:50.560 Mike Sovin.

00:08:52.420 Mike Chauvin.

00:08:53.600 That was the guy who did it for you?

00:08:54.380 Mike Chauvin.

00:08:55.040 Yeah, he died.

00:08:55.600 Yeah.

00:08:56.240 He died really tragically, too.

00:08:58.340 Yeah?

00:08:58.920 Yeah, his brake lines were cut.

00:09:00.700 Uh-uh.

00:09:01.280 Uh-huh.

00:09:01.600 Somebody cut his brake lines. 0.99

00:09:02.920 What are the fucking irony of that? 0.99

00:09:04.960 I know. 0.98

00:09:05.720 That's kind of the universe doing its thing.

00:09:07.480 Yeah.

00:09:08.340 Oh, yeah.

00:09:09.020 Karma remembers, man. 1.00

00:09:10.180 Dude, yeah, so bad for you guys just like fucking, it was a perfect combination, man. 0.99

00:09:18.280 It was great timing, and then the pandemic helped the show. 0.99

00:09:22.400 But when Bobby went back to rehab, which I've sent him to three times, we're trying to keep

00:09:27.060 him safe and clean, and he's doing a great job.

00:09:29.680 But when he went back to rehab after his dad died, the story goes that he relapsed.

00:09:36.300 I knew.

00:09:37.440 Almost nobody knew.

00:09:38.360 I don't think anybody really knew.

00:09:39.780 Like, people kind of talked to him.

00:09:41.360 Maybe there was suspicion that he was acting weird, but he's a weirdo.

00:09:45.280 So, it's like, how do you really, but then he was hiding out a lot.

00:09:48.240 I knew.

00:09:48.860 He told me not to tell anybody.

00:09:50.380 I got real uncomfortable.

00:09:52.060 I kind of started to, you know, question, like, I'll just ruin our friendship, I guess,

00:09:59.400 and tell him, and tell people.

00:10:00.940 Right.

00:10:01.400 Because he was like, I'll never talk to you again if you tell anybody that I'm using. 1.00

00:10:04.940 So, I was like, well, fuck it. 1.00

00:10:06.760 I guess I'll just lose a friend. 1.00

00:10:07.740 And then, really, before I started to go after and tell people, Kalilah came at me 1.00

00:10:14.420 and was like, I knew he's using, and I knew he, like, used you against me to try to hide

00:10:19.440 it, you know?

00:10:20.300 And she's like, I'm sorry you had to go through that.

00:10:21.840 But then, finally, he admitted it to me, and he apologized and was like, I'll go get help.

00:10:25.940 And I said, he goes, when I get out, we'll start the show.

00:10:28.920 Because Kalilah, when I had filled in for Tiger Belly, she had been like, go do a show 0.86

00:10:32.660 together.

00:10:33.260 Because the fans wanted it, and people talked about it.

00:10:35.480 So, when he got out and he got clean, that's when we started it.

00:10:37.480 And then, three months into it, pandemic hit.

00:10:40.300 It was almost like a gift from God, because then we got to just shoot all the time and

00:10:44.080 be together in the studio.

00:10:45.680 I mean, truly, it was, you know.

00:10:47.440 And you need that.

00:10:48.220 If you're really building one, I think you've got to have time.

00:10:50.900 I think that's one thing that I didn't realize, I think, over the years is just, like, how

00:10:56.060 much time it takes to do a podcast.

00:10:57.880 There's a lot that goes into it.

00:10:58.820 This is a job.

00:10:59.560 Yeah.

00:10:59.720 And then, when I first started going on Rogan's, and then I realized he does this job

00:11:05.220 five, sometimes six days a week.

00:11:08.260 And then his other job.

00:11:09.640 And then his other job.

00:11:10.680 Yeah.

00:11:10.940 And then his other job.

00:11:12.020 And he still has kettlebells in his hand while he's doing it.

00:11:14.200 Yeah.

00:11:14.640 Like, in the middle of it, he's just ripping bells.

00:11:18.120 He's the most impressive work ethic I've ever seen in my entire life.

00:11:21.760 That's a good point.

00:11:22.140 Hands down.

00:11:22.880 The work ethic is through the roof.

00:11:24.020 And then open a comedy club and change the scene.

00:11:25.900 Yeah. 0.98

00:11:26.360 It's ridiculous. 0.86

00:11:27.320 It's, like, for anyone that has any doubts or any questions or even thoughts about him 0.86

00:11:31.480 that are, you know, negative or against the grain, it's like, you don't understand that

00:11:35.920 guy.

00:11:36.200 He's a machine, a magic machine.

00:11:39.380 Yeah.

00:11:39.780 I wonder how much pressure he, and he doesn't let, if he does feel pressure, he doesn't let

00:11:45.200 you see it.

00:11:45.780 That's what's most amazing to me.

00:11:47.540 Yeah.

00:11:47.800 Because, well, I think he's, he deals with it in the only way he knows how, which is just

00:11:52.500 keep going and enjoy it.

00:11:54.000 One time we were sitting in the green room, we were on, when I first went on tour with

00:11:57.260 him, we were playing arenas.

00:11:58.640 And, um, I was like, man, this is incredible.

00:12:01.700 You know, like I was kind of like soaking it in and he was like, yeah, but you know,

00:12:04.620 don't let it get to you.

00:12:05.960 Meaning like, just do it, enjoy it and make it seem like it's any other show.

00:12:09.880 Yeah.

00:12:10.200 And keep moving.

00:12:10.900 Don't let it be like overwhelming where you start thinking too much and then you get in

00:12:14.300 your head about it and then it kind of consumes you.

00:12:16.760 And then you can become one of those people who's like, how come I'm not, how come it's not,

00:12:20.800 why am I not?

00:12:22.120 Yeah. 1.00

00:12:22.440 Let all that bullshit go. 0.99

00:12:23.300 He's like, just, just be in it and keep moving. 1.00

00:12:26.600 Yeah.

00:12:26.920 He keeps it moving.

00:12:28.120 He keeps everything going.

00:12:29.080 He doesn't dwell.

00:12:30.280 No dwelling out of that.

00:12:31.380 It's so funny.

00:12:31.980 Cause I think, yeah, once you get going in podcasts, you're like, you obviously want to shoot for

00:12:36.260 the stars.

00:12:36.760 You were like, I mean, I know there was a time when we all, I feel like we're trying to not

00:12:40.940 be like Rogan, but it was like, you look, you know, you shoot for the, you wanted to do

00:12:44.460 what he got, what he got to do.

00:12:45.940 I wanted to do what he got to do.

00:12:47.120 Yeah.

00:12:47.220 Well, you want to do it.

00:12:48.060 Well, I'm not going to, I'm going to learn from Michael Jordan, you know?

00:12:50.540 Right.

00:12:50.800 I'm not going to learn from, um.

00:12:52.340 Go ahead.

00:12:53.560 You know, Carl Malone.

00:12:56.840 Yeah.

00:12:57.200 Yeah.

00:13:00.640 Carl Malone.

00:13:01.480 Yeah. 1.00

00:13:01.680 I'm not going to learn from Carl Malone and this fucking 12 year old wife child, you 1.00

00:13:08.160 know? 1.00

00:13:08.500 And that's alleged.

00:13:09.660 I, people don't know that, but everybody knows that.

00:13:12.160 But, um, I do, I want to know what was it like touring with bad friends?

00:13:17.520 Me and Bob on tour.

00:13:18.480 Yeah.

00:13:18.620 I mean, cause I remember I, I ran across you guys.

00:13:20.640 We were in DC.

00:13:22.080 This is how funny it was DC.

00:13:23.480 This is how DC was Theo.

00:13:25.340 So, I mean, you know, I'm not going to, I don't want to do it to make you feel a type

00:13:29.900 of way, but I'm so proud of you and so happy for you as a friend who's known you for so

00:13:33.800 long.

00:13:34.180 I was so proud of like you and your success.

00:13:37.000 And it really does make, you know, it's kind of like, cause you're ours a little bit, you

00:13:40.900 know what I mean?

00:13:41.280 Like I watched it happen.

00:13:43.020 So I was like, just proud of you.

00:13:45.060 I know proud is a weird word, but I'm happy for you or whatever.

00:13:47.800 And when we're in DC, we did one show at the constitution hall and Theo was gracious enough

00:13:55.380 to take one night off so we could do it.

00:13:57.040 Cause the schedules overlapped.

00:13:58.200 So you did four shows there, right?

00:13:59.960 Or five, something like that.

00:14:01.020 Yeah, I think so.

00:14:01.860 And, uh, we barely sold out one and he sold out five.

00:14:06.100 I was like, God, dude, it was awesome.

00:14:08.640 But then we met in the hotel.

00:14:09.580 We had a great night together and we're chatting and like, I wanted to be at y'all show.

00:14:12.940 Well, those moments were amazing because like the road has dull moments where you're

00:14:17.360 humming along on the bus.

00:14:18.680 It was tough.

00:14:19.700 Was it?

00:14:20.140 And you and Bobby are on the same bus.

00:14:21.400 Yeah.

00:14:21.680 Yeah.

00:14:21.960 It was tough.

00:14:22.600 Yeah.

00:14:22.780 It was tough.

00:14:23.220 Yeah.

00:14:23.320 Cause we have our tour manager on our bus.

00:14:24.820 Like it's like a group effort.

00:14:26.220 Yeah.

00:14:26.420 Everyone has to be on the bus, but, um, is that fun?

00:14:29.840 What's it like being in that sort of a club?

00:14:31.500 Like, I can't imagine being on wheels with Bobby.

00:14:34.360 That's where it gets extremely alarming.

00:14:36.080 Yeah.

00:14:36.240 Mobile is tough with him.

00:14:37.300 Yeah.

00:14:37.500 Cause at least you're on land, you can disappear.

00:14:39.240 Yeah.

00:14:39.400 You can walk away from him. 0.57

00:14:40.440 A lot of Asians aren't good in motion, right? 1.00

00:14:43.020 Like, um, in any kind of form of motion. 0.89

00:14:45.460 Have you ever seen an Asian drive a boat? 1.00

00:14:47.700 They're not allowed to.

00:14:49.220 No, that's against sea.

00:14:50.060 That's maritime law.

00:14:50.920 No Asians at sea. 1.00

00:14:52.520 It's an old, I think it's from world war one.

00:14:54.760 Well, if you think about Asians, like they don't, there's the kamikaze pilots, right? 1.00

00:15:00.200 That's a, no, that's, and then there's, um, driving Asians is throughout the history 1.00

00:15:09.960 of time has been traumatic.

00:15:11.760 Yeah.

00:15:12.080 Yeah.

00:15:12.320 Has been traumatic for people.

00:15:14.300 And then even like, if you go to look at like Iwo Jima, like the troops, they would

00:15:18.380 hide in the tunnels or in Vietnam in the Coochie tunnels.

00:15:20.700 Like it's very, once they get in motion, they can't handle it.

00:15:24.380 Yeah.

00:15:24.500 They get afraid.

00:15:25.160 Well, uh, you know, it's, I think it's tough when they're like Bob, if you ever see Bob

00:15:29.080 try to like run or like walk fast.

00:15:31.020 Oh yeah.

00:15:31.360 It's so sad.

00:15:31.600 He starts to wobble.

00:15:32.320 Yeah.

00:15:32.460 He'll get off axis.

00:15:33.680 It's kind of strange.

00:15:34.420 I'll have to hold him sometimes if he's in a hurry.

00:15:36.440 Yeah.

00:15:36.640 So I'll shoulder him up if he's in a hurry so we can walk in a straighter line.

00:15:40.800 Yeah.

00:15:41.100 It's nerve wracking.

00:15:42.400 Yeah.

00:15:43.420 And he has only like one muscle in his body.

00:15:46.200 I've seen like a MRI of him or something.

00:15:49.200 It's baffling.

00:15:50.020 Because I remember he sneezed once and blew his back out.

00:15:52.440 Yeah.

00:15:52.760 Well, do he, and the muscle moves.

00:15:54.100 That's what's kind of interesting.

00:15:55.460 He'll, the muscle, at some point he'll have a muscle just on his high shoulder.

00:15:58.340 If he's, if he was moving a lot, it'll move down to his, his leg.

00:16:01.560 He'll have.

00:16:01.780 He swims around his body like a koi.

00:16:04.400 It's alarming.

00:16:06.600 Him on a bus was wild.

00:16:07.860 We did 60 some odd cities. 1.00

00:16:09.460 Fucking, oh dude. 0.99

00:16:10.480 It was wild. 1.00

00:16:11.480 Yeah.

00:16:11.720 We stopped and started, stopped and started.

00:16:13.760 I had a, I don't even know if you heard this through the grapevine.

00:16:15.680 I had a, I almost, almost had a, well, I did have a mental breakdown with him at, at

00:16:22.520 Dolly World.

00:16:24.640 Wait, Dolly World?

00:16:25.500 In Tennessee?

00:16:25.900 Dollywood.

00:16:26.340 Dollywood.

00:16:26.840 Yeah.

00:16:27.680 Had a mental breakdown.

00:16:28.880 Yeah.

00:16:29.560 Huge.

00:16:30.740 What happened?

00:16:31.480 So it had just been a lot of time on the bus?

00:16:33.320 We were just tired of each other, man.

00:16:34.620 You know how it gets?

00:16:35.420 And then he was, he, we were supposed to go to Dolly World, Dollywood, uh, at a certain

00:16:41.360 time, right?

00:16:42.180 At a reasonable adult time, like 1130 or noon, reasonable adult.

00:16:46.460 And he had slept in past when we were going to all go together.

00:16:49.280 Then he threw a fit about it that we were rushing him, which is insane.

00:16:53.060 How, what do you need to really do?

00:16:54.260 You put on the kimono and let's go.

00:16:55.840 So we get on the bus, we go, we get to Dollywood, we get in.

00:17:00.140 And then he says, I want to sit down and eat a meal.

00:17:02.000 And I said, we just got here.

00:17:03.060 Let's go enjoy it.

00:17:04.340 All the crew is with us.

00:17:05.860 And he's like, I want to eat.

00:17:07.500 You can go do whatever you want.

00:17:08.820 And him and I were bickering.

00:17:10.480 And I just was like, you know what?

00:17:12.160 You're right.

00:17:12.920 I am going to go do what I want.

00:17:14.180 So I left and they were all like, oh, where are you going?

00:17:16.340 And I just went on my own.

00:17:17.320 I just wanted to be, some days you want to just be alone.

00:17:19.140 Oh.

00:17:19.840 And there was only one Uber in Pigeon Forge.

00:17:22.380 There's one Uber.

00:17:23.360 Yeah.

00:17:23.560 I'm not kidding.

00:17:24.080 There's one Uber.

00:17:24.900 And the dude and his girlfriend were driving.

00:17:28.100 That was the only car available.

00:17:29.540 Yeah.

00:17:29.840 And the guy calls himself Paul Revere.

00:17:32.020 Yeah.

00:17:32.240 Which I don't like it.

00:17:33.160 I don't like it.

00:17:33.880 And his girlfriend doesn't say, it doesn't make any, any comments about it.

00:17:37.100 Cause I said, you're not going to say anything about Paul.

00:17:40.120 She's not allowed to talk.

00:17:41.160 No.

00:17:41.460 Well, and I agree, but she, he picked me up and I had told, I had asked him where the closest airport

00:17:47.940 was cause I was going to fly home to Chicago to see my parents.

00:17:50.160 Cause I was like, I need a break.

00:17:51.180 We had four days down anyway.

00:17:53.060 And then they got in the Uber hours later and the same guy was like, your friend asking for a local airport.

00:17:59.360 I think he done took off.

00:18:00.540 But so my phone was off.

00:18:01.580 So they thought I left.

00:18:02.700 They were like, he quit the tour.

00:18:03.780 The tour is over.

00:18:04.540 Yeah.

00:18:04.820 They kind of had a moment of panic and they, he deserved it because I needed a break from him being a little brat.

00:18:09.700 So it kind of like checked us.

00:18:11.000 But then of course what happened afterwards, he woke up in the morning.

00:18:13.780 The next day I came back to the bus and he gave me a big hug and a kiss on the cheek.

00:18:17.660 And he said he was sorry.

00:18:18.660 And then it was, you know, like anything is my, is my brother.

00:18:21.660 Yeah.

00:18:21.960 But you fight, you brother, you fight, you fight.

00:18:23.800 Oh, being on a tour bus is hard.

00:18:25.580 It's hard. 0.98

00:18:26.240 It sucks. 0.98

00:18:27.100 You're on top of each other. 1.00

00:18:28.540 It smells.

00:18:29.820 Everyone's messy.

00:18:31.160 Oh, especially.

00:18:32.060 You can hear the way.

00:18:33.080 Oh yeah.

00:18:34.040 Listening to the way he sleeps.

00:18:35.200 He sleeps so, it's so weird the way he sleeps.

00:18:38.480 You can hear him sleeping.

00:18:39.520 Yeah.

00:18:39.680 Somebody said he sounds kind of like a little bit of like a generator, you know?

00:18:42.540 We, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we.

00:18:44.600 Yeah.

00:18:44.880 That's it.

00:18:45.120 Yeah, like a bad, like he has a bad fan belt or something, you know?

00:18:47.140 Yeah, something, there's a hiccup.

00:18:48.180 There's a, you know, like one thing skipping over.

00:18:50.340 It needs to be realigned, but he'll never get it done.

00:18:52.460 Like his dat fan belt is off, you know? 0.98

00:18:58.180 Oh, he'll never get it fucking realigned. 0.98

00:19:00.180 No, he'll never get it realigned. 1.00

00:19:01.220 He's one, Bobby is one loose, he steps on one bad rock and he's fucking. 0.99

00:19:06.500 He's gone. 1.00

00:19:06.920 That's it.

00:19:07.440 So I don't want to lose him.

00:19:08.520 So I, I really do take good care of him, but it was a while.

00:19:10.940 It was a great tour.

00:19:11.600 We had a great time, but we're, we're going to go down to Australia at the end of the year

00:19:14.460 because we owe that to them because we canceled it.

00:19:17.220 And then after that, we're not going to tour for at least another whole year.

00:19:20.760 We're bad friends.

00:19:21.500 Yeah.

00:19:21.720 Oh yeah.

00:19:22.300 Well, you got to take some breaks, man.

00:19:23.640 And you got to, I know you're doing your own too.

00:19:25.580 Yeah.

00:19:25.720 I'm doing my own tour in the fall to shoot my new special.

00:19:28.860 I'm doing with Hulu.

00:19:30.840 Hulu.

00:19:31.340 Nice.

00:19:32.000 Yeah.

00:19:32.220 Hulu got a lot of, Hulu pulled a lot of people away from Netflix.

00:19:35.180 Well, I think a lot these days it's a Netflix was like the first one.

00:19:38.960 And now I think the, um, people are just seeing more.

00:19:42.660 I wonder what, can we see where people are watching?

00:19:45.280 Yeah.

00:19:45.560 Burr moved, uh, Sebastian, a bunch of people moved.

00:19:49.760 Hulu.

00:19:50.360 Yeah.

00:19:50.680 Hulu's doing it.

00:19:51.280 Well, they're doing one special a month, which is amazing.

00:19:53.700 So you get the whole month.

00:19:54.680 The lineup is insane.

00:19:55.560 I don't even know if half of them allowed to announce some of the people that are on there,

00:19:57.840 but it's incredible.

00:19:58.640 Well, Burr says right here, he's going to be on there.

00:20:00.420 Yeah.

00:20:00.620 He's, he was one of the first ones that they got.

00:20:02.000 Um, Gaffigan.

00:20:03.160 Yeah.

00:20:03.440 Jim Gaffigan, Burr, uh, Sebastian, Roy Wood.

00:20:07.660 Is he?

00:20:08.120 Yeah.

00:20:08.300 He's the man.

00:20:08.880 I love that.

00:20:09.420 I think that dude is so underrated.

00:20:10.920 It's unbelievable.

00:20:11.720 Dude, I did ayahuasca with him.

00:20:13.180 With Roy?

00:20:13.780 Yeah.

00:20:14.240 Beautiful, beautiful man.

00:20:15.920 Smart, sweet.

00:20:17.580 He's sleeping in the distance.

00:20:19.220 He like had a couple of servings or whatever and then went and took a big nap.

00:20:22.680 Well, you got to rest it off.

00:20:23.840 Oh, yeah.

00:20:24.920 You got to do what you're, what you're called to do.

00:20:26.500 Netflix, still the top dog though, huh?

00:20:28.200 Look at that.

00:20:29.280 Streaming services by subscribers in the world.

00:20:31.780 Yeah.

00:20:32.000 They're glow.

00:20:32.420 Well, here's the other thing.

00:20:33.340 Hulu goes global in 2025.

00:20:35.140 They're not global yet.

00:20:36.220 So next year is, that's why they're doing this special.

00:20:38.360 I think they're doing the specials in this regard because they wanted to go global finally

00:20:42.520 because they weren't global before.

00:20:43.960 I see.

00:20:44.320 So I wonder if we can show America alone because this says, uh, globally, Netflix has 270

00:20:49.640 million and Hulu has 50 million.

00:20:52.060 But if...

00:20:53.080 50 is only in the U.S.

00:20:54.060 Yeah.

00:20:54.200 Right.

00:20:54.600 That's only U.S. only.

00:20:55.740 Yeah.

00:20:55.880 Netflix has got to be around 50 to 70.

00:20:57.740 Who knows?

00:20:58.300 80 in the, in the U.S.

00:20:59.380 But, but anyway, yeah, man, I'm doing that.

00:21:01.400 So I'm touring all fall to go gear up for that.

00:21:03.560 All fall, I'll be running around, which I'm excited to do.

00:21:06.340 I'm going to come, uh, I'm coming your way.

00:21:07.920 I'll come say hi to you out there.

00:21:09.100 Yeah.

00:21:09.380 In Nash Vegas.

00:21:10.100 Yeah.

00:21:10.400 I love it out there.

00:21:11.400 I have such a good time when I'm out there.

00:21:12.820 Do you?

00:21:13.080 I really do.

00:21:14.420 And I love Lucy at Zaney's and I like it over...

00:21:16.720 It's just not...

00:21:17.180 I don't know.

00:21:17.480 A lot of golf over there too.

00:21:18.280 It's your world.

00:21:18.900 Big, big golf.

00:21:19.780 I played some good golf out there.

00:21:20.640 Oh, if you like to have a little bit of whiskey and golf, Nashville really is your place,

00:21:24.900 man.

00:21:25.000 I think about that all the time.

00:21:26.060 It's like, man, I kind of don't have the two great elements that people love here the

00:21:30.200 most.

00:21:30.620 Why wouldn't you golf?

00:21:31.340 You think you could?

00:21:33.060 I think I could.

00:21:34.360 I just...

00:21:34.600 You're athletic.

00:21:35.280 Yeah.

00:21:35.440 I should probably spend a little more time doing it.

00:21:37.520 I don't want to go out.

00:21:38.620 I've been out there and it's not good.

00:21:40.820 And I don't want to go out there again and waste people's time because people are a little

00:21:44.260 more serious about it there. 0.98

00:21:45.500 Well, see, I'm good at golf, but I don't give a shit how good people are that I play. 0.98

00:21:49.560 I couldn't care less. 0.98

00:21:50.880 If you're fun, I don't care.

00:21:53.100 Oh yeah, I just got back from Scotland.

00:21:54.880 No way.

00:21:55.780 Yeah, I went to St. Andrews, the old course, man.

00:21:57.720 It was so much fun.

00:21:59.440 Was it really?

00:22:00.220 I went with a bunch of friends.

00:22:01.120 Yeah, I went with a couple...

00:22:01.780 I actually went with only one good...

00:22:03.640 I went with Charlie Day, the actor, and a bunch of his friends.

00:22:06.900 So I didn't...

00:22:07.640 I was like the last guy invited.

00:22:10.020 I was like, hey man, I...

00:22:11.220 No way, dude.

00:22:12.800 St. Andrews.

00:22:14.520 What's it like?

00:22:16.080 Honestly, man, it was a dream come true for me.

00:22:19.720 Like as a kid, those are like...

00:22:21.460 You always want to play the courses the pros get to play.

00:22:23.740 Oh yeah.

00:22:24.580 I got to play at St. Andrews and it was...

00:22:27.580 And we played at five other courses, but traveling around Scotland...

00:22:30.740 I mean, honestly, such a beautiful, beautiful country, but truly the worst food I've ever

00:22:35.680 had in my entire life.

00:22:36.820 Oh, it's all war meals.

00:22:37.940 It's unbelievable.

00:22:39.020 It's unbelievable.

00:22:40.320 It's like...

00:22:40.720 You're like, well, get back out there.

00:22:41.800 Get back out there.

00:22:42.620 Yeah.

00:22:42.920 Yeah.

00:22:43.040 Gonna get back out there.

00:22:44.200 Just get some food and go.

00:22:45.940 It's terrible.

00:22:46.960 It's terrible.

00:22:47.660 And also, this is proof.

00:22:49.540 You definitely...

00:22:50.140 You need minorities.

00:22:51.900 Yeah.

00:22:52.020 You have to get people with melanin to get good flavor and spices.

00:22:54.980 It's way too many whites. 1.00

00:22:55.900 It's flooded with whites. 0.91

00:22:57.120 Oh yeah.

00:22:57.540 It's overwhelmed.

00:22:58.540 Well, I've always said too, like a lot of people are like, we need less crime in some of

00:23:02.380 these cities.

00:23:02.740 I'm like, but you're going to have less good recipes.

00:23:06.020 Mm-hmm.

00:23:06.520 Bad food.

00:23:07.260 Yeah.

00:23:07.600 Bad food.

00:23:08.200 Yeah.

00:23:08.400 What's the, you know, what's the balance?

00:23:10.160 Yeah.

00:23:10.480 You want good food?

00:23:12.000 Yeah.

00:23:14.120 Dude.

00:23:14.840 If you want good food, dude, you're going to need bars on your windows.

00:23:17.980 Okay.

00:23:18.160 Sorry.

00:23:18.520 You get a caged door.

00:23:19.420 Big deal.

00:23:19.980 Lock it up at night.

00:23:20.760 But it's so true, man.

00:23:24.100 People don't want the, people don't want the crime, but they want the food. 0.99

00:23:26.280 And that's the kind of shit that's just not fair. 0.99

00:23:28.680 Yeah. 0.99

00:23:29.060 Skyland was fun.

00:23:29.800 It was just, uh, it was beautiful.

00:23:31.620 It was beautiful.

00:23:32.160 We went over there for, uh, like eight, nine days or something like that.

00:23:35.420 And it was a beautiful little trip to go golf.

00:23:37.880 But it's honestly, it's a bonding experience for friends.

00:23:40.340 It's just a way to see your friends.

00:23:41.420 Cause as we get older, we don't see each other as much.

00:23:43.860 We just don't like we have to run each other on the road or you have to set up a good dinner.

00:23:47.560 Like I was at dinner with Spady and Swartz and the other night and it's like, but you

00:23:51.480 have to fight to set it up.

00:23:52.400 Cause everyone's schedule is like, it's gone.

00:23:54.940 It's so you have to cognizantly go, I'm going to do it.

00:23:57.640 We have to like map out the time.

00:23:59.300 So this was a way to like make no excuses, say I'm doing it.

00:24:03.400 Don't, don't throw in more work, you know, just go.

00:24:06.560 Oh, that's awesome.

00:24:07.360 Good for you for making that and setting it out for yourself.

00:24:09.840 That's a hard thing to do too, you know, cause I know you're competitive like me and you

00:24:13.040 want to keep grinding.

00:24:14.400 Yeah.

00:24:14.840 Yeah. 0.76

00:24:15.180 It's well, and you, you're a grind addict.

00:24:17.260 I mean, I am too.

00:24:18.100 It's bad, but you're like, I want to keep doing shows.

00:24:20.360 I want to keep growing my career and you know, I want to keep building this thing cause it's

00:24:23.820 fun once you're doing it.

00:24:25.180 But if you don't take a step back to go do a thing for you, I don't know, man, you're

00:24:29.600 going to, you know, it's going to be, it's going to be, you're going to be gone.

00:24:32.880 Yeah.

00:24:33.580 Certain parts of you starts to disappear.

00:24:35.460 Starts with my hair for me.

00:24:36.560 A lot of times I'll start falling.

00:24:37.680 That's when I know I'm getting too stressed out.

00:24:38.980 When you're stressing out too much.

00:24:40.040 Yeah.

00:24:40.320 I can just like, I'll just start finding it.

00:24:42.500 My back will just, I'll lose, my back will seize up.

00:24:45.400 I'll start having back problems when I get really stressed out.

00:24:48.320 One time I couldn't feel my foot for like a week.

00:24:50.940 The worst thing is say you are going to, you're in the bathroom, right?

00:24:55.500 And you're sitting down and you, you're pooping. 0.80

00:25:01.160 That's what I was going to say.

00:25:01.880 Yeah.

00:25:02.140 Yeah.

00:25:02.280 I got it when you said so.

00:25:03.340 Okay.

00:25:03.560 Yeah.

00:25:03.900 Yeah.

00:25:04.060 So you're doing a poop or whatever, doing a number two and your legs fall.

00:25:08.280 So you've been there for a long time.

00:25:09.320 Has that ever happened?

00:25:09.920 I like that a lot.

00:25:10.680 Oh, I love it.

00:25:11.680 I like it.

00:25:12.660 Cause then you get up all wobbly, bobbly.

00:25:14.500 You know, you, when you get up off the toilet, then you look like a kill Tony guest.

00:25:17.680 You know what I mean?

00:25:18.080 You get, you start wobbling around your bathroom.

00:25:22.200 Oh dude, you can't even make it back to wherever you're going. 1.00

00:25:25.600 Like if anybody saw you then, just like what kind of shit did you take? 0.99

00:25:31.060 How long were you there? 1.00

00:25:32.380 Dear God.

00:25:33.280 Yeah.

00:25:33.420 But you know what's so funny is I got told that you can't, I spend a lot of time in the

00:25:37.560 bathroom.

00:25:37.840 I read, I like to sit and read and they say you can't cause that's how you get there.

00:25:42.780 They can look it up.

00:25:43.320 That's how people get really bad hemorrhoids from sitting too long.

00:25:45.660 Uh-uh.

00:25:46.180 Yeah.

00:25:46.380 But I'm not pushing harder and I'm not doing, I'm just sitting and chilling.

00:25:49.040 But they say, if you sit too long, that's how you incite hemorrhoids because of the,

00:25:52.540 the blood flow.

00:25:53.640 So now I'm, now I don't get to sit and chill anymore, but that was my place.

00:25:57.300 See, look at that.

00:25:58.620 Hemorrhoids are when the veins or blood vessels in and around your honest and lower rectum becomes

00:26:05.140 swollen and irritated.

00:26:07.100 Yeah.

00:26:07.480 Sitting on the toilet too long can cause it.

00:26:09.120 It's a, it's bad.

00:26:10.220 You got to get off of that. 0.98

00:26:11.300 I bet this used to happen a lot in like, um, 1600s and shit. 0.99

00:26:15.380 Well, think, no, think about this. 0.99

00:26:16.280 They used to poop in holes in the ground.

00:26:17.460 They dig a hole.

00:26:18.080 So it was uncomfortable.

00:26:19.340 They couldn't relax.

00:26:20.560 They weren't relaxing.

00:26:21.400 Right.

00:26:21.660 No, it's quick and out.

00:26:22.900 You know, like if you've been camping, I had to camp, I had to poop against a rock.

00:26:26.240 You got to lean against a rock and poop.

00:26:27.660 You got to get out of there.

00:26:28.460 Yeah.

00:26:28.720 You don't have time to like sit and think.

00:26:31.000 Although maybe in like the, uh, you're talking like a Victorian era, right?

00:26:36.220 When they, like, when they, when, whenever toilets were first, like a nice sitting toilet

00:26:40.800 was invented.

00:26:41.480 Yeah.

00:26:41.600 When was that?

00:26:42.420 They probably did really sit and really.

00:26:44.440 Oh, once some bro, once somebody rolled in with a toilet dude, which is basically like 0.99

00:26:51.680 a car for a shit. 0.99

00:26:53.140 Right. 1.00

00:26:53.680 Right.

00:26:54.960 People were like, who is this?

00:26:57.800 Well, you know, Kings and Queens, you know, Kings were eating on that.

00:27:00.300 You know, they wanted me once they saw how comfortable it was, you know, they were like,

00:27:03.620 well, give me a, give me a meal.

00:27:05.040 Yeah.

00:27:05.460 Yeah.

00:27:05.660 Give me something to snack on.

00:27:06.800 I can just sit here and it can be one fluid thing.

00:27:09.860 Give me a two way contract.

00:27:10.900 Come on.

00:27:11.840 Roman times.

00:27:12.600 Can we zoom in a little bit?

00:27:13.560 See, that's actually pretty beautiful. 1.00

00:27:15.500 Oh, a group shit, dude. 1.00

00:27:17.280 Imagine that. 1.00

00:27:18.760 What the F, dude?

00:27:20.360 Well, honestly, that's, that's bond.

00:27:22.080 That's bonding.

00:27:22.900 You really want to get close to someone. 1.00

00:27:24.300 You group shit. 1.00

00:27:24.620 And look, if you go back up to that group shit shot, you can see their legs have to over 1.00

00:27:27.920 cross. 0.99

00:27:28.500 They can't be leg by leg.

00:27:29.500 You have to cross your legs over each other.

00:27:31.020 But that's the Romans. 0.99

00:27:31.900 They did all sorts of weird shit like that. 0.99

00:27:33.320 Those are, they were weirdos, dude. 0.99

00:27:34.780 Hey, but yeah.

00:27:35.500 What if you're just like, whoa, nice one, Rick, you know, or somebody, you guys are in there.

00:27:40.460 Guys, if you can't see this, if you're listening, but there's literally,

00:27:42.940 it's a bath, it's like a shelf, like a shelf with holes in it.

00:27:46.800 It's a shelf with holes in it, but there's no like little walls or anything in between.

00:27:49.920 It's just, just sit and cross, just leg over leg.

00:27:52.620 Yeah.

00:27:52.740 It's almost like you'd be in a sauna, but if somebody cut holes in there and then people

00:27:57.080 were allowed to do number twos as they wished.

00:27:59.900 It kind of looks, it looks more Greek than Roman, to be honest with you.

00:28:03.500 It looks like Greeks do, Greeks are, Greeks were into all sorts of fun stuff like that.

00:28:07.940 Yeah. 0.55

00:28:08.080 They were more like perverted and stuff like that. 0.87

00:28:10.540 Super perverse. 0.64

00:28:11.440 By 315 AD, Rome had 144 public toilets.

00:28:14.760 The Romans treated going to the toilet as a social event.

00:28:17.600 They met friends, exchanged views, caught up on the news and wiped themselves with a

00:28:22.180 piece of sponge fixed to a short wooden handle. 0.99

00:28:24.860 What if you got a little ass on the sponge? 0.99

00:28:26.600 You want to be first on that. 1.00

00:28:27.920 You don't want to be the caboose on that sponge.

00:28:29.720 You want to go first.

00:28:31.120 You want to be number one for number two.

00:28:32.660 Oh, what?

00:28:36.000 Medieval times.

00:28:36.760 Let's cruise up a little bit.

00:28:37.660 This is really interesting.

00:28:38.940 In medieval England, people used potties and would simply throw their contents through

00:28:43.500 a door or window into the street.

00:28:45.360 Yeah. 1.00

00:28:45.540 You'd shit and toss it. 1.00

00:28:47.180 Yeah. 1.00

00:28:47.660 Unreal.

00:28:48.580 Yeah.

00:28:48.840 The more affluent would use a garter robe or protruding room with an opening for ways

00:28:53.580 to spend it over a moat.

00:28:55.280 Right.

00:28:55.800 Oh, wow.

00:28:56.320 So that was almost like plumbing.

00:28:57.860 It was like it had a way to get out to the moat.

00:29:00.320 But that was also and then that's then that's another way to keep people away from your

00:29:03.540 castle, too.

00:29:04.160 Oh, yeah. 1.00

00:29:04.580 Because they got a shit river floating around it. 0.99

00:29:06.640 You don't want to get in that. 0.99

00:29:07.720 You know, think about that about moats.

00:29:08.940 You thought it was like this clean water. 1.00

00:29:12.340 Shit river, bud. 1.00

00:29:13.500 See, that's a nice story. 0.99

00:29:14.440 That looks like on a plane.

00:29:16.700 That's just that's just American Airlines.

00:29:18.320 That's a shot from.

00:29:22.640 Francis Louis the 11th hid his commode behind curtains while Elizabeth the first covered

00:29:29.120 hers in crimson velvet and lace using sprigs of herbs to disguise the odors.

00:29:34.220 Well, yeah, you forget they didn't shower.

00:29:35.780 They showered like once a month or something if you're lucky.

00:29:39.020 Yeah. 0.94

00:29:39.540 So they stunk. 0.63

00:29:40.740 A lot of them.

00:29:41.280 So I don't know which one it was, but one of the one of the queens, which queen notoriously 0.97

00:29:46.380 never showered?

00:29:47.300 There was one that like refused to shower and she loved it.

00:29:51.120 She thought it was like she's from Slidell or not.

00:29:54.580 Fake history.

00:29:55.460 The curious comes about Elizabeth the first bathing habits. 0.71

00:29:58.120 Yeah, she. 0.93

00:29:59.160 Oh, she did.

00:29:59.780 So she did bathe.

00:30:01.560 Some people said she didn't.

00:30:03.080 It was a myth, huh?

00:30:03.900 That's a bummer.

00:30:04.740 I kind of wanted it to be real. 1.00

00:30:06.100 Oh, I like them bitches. 1.00

00:30:07.160 That's a little bit nasty. 1.00

00:30:08.360 A little stanky?

00:30:08.780 You like them stanky a little bit.

00:30:10.420 I don't like like post EDC.

00:30:13.480 Yeah, but not like living in a birdbath.

00:30:17.080 You know what I'm saying?

00:30:17.820 Like, yeah, you want them to be you want them to be just a little you want them to be

00:30:22.900 organic, but not, uh, not farm to table.

00:30:27.220 Yeah.

00:30:27.840 Yeah.

00:30:28.620 Yeah.

00:30:29.000 Yeah.

00:30:29.280 Yeah.

00:30:30.080 That's what I want.

00:30:31.940 The summer Olympics are popping off, baby.

00:30:34.420 That's where it's at.

00:30:36.280 USA just, uh, battled their first game against Australia in basketball.

00:30:40.900 They got the dub.

00:30:42.540 That's for sure.

00:30:44.040 If you play a sport or if you ice skate, or if you just even just, just wrestle with your

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00:33:23.880 Tell me about Vegas.

00:33:24.900 I want to hear it, dude.

00:33:25.800 Dude, you went to Grateful Dead, too.

00:33:28.440 Wow.

00:33:29.160 Dead and Co.

00:33:29.700 Dead and Co.

00:33:30.400 Sorry.

00:33:30.980 Grateful Dead and Co.

00:33:32.360 Yeah, the Dead and Company.

00:33:33.540 Yeah, I went a couple weeks ago.

00:33:37.000 I went like three weeks ago.

00:33:37.740 I don't know.

00:33:38.000 Adam Ray and I went with our ladies and we...

00:33:41.120 He's crushing it.

00:33:42.200 Dude, I'm so proud of the kid.

00:33:43.520 I know.

00:33:43.640 It's awesome.

00:33:44.420 Yeah, we went and had such a good time.

00:33:45.660 It was also like a last minute.

00:33:47.600 We were chatting.

00:33:48.920 Sal Vulcano came in.

00:33:50.000 We had dinner.

00:33:51.220 Adam and I were talking about doing it.

00:33:54.400 And John Mayer, who's a sweetheart, was like, whatever you guys want.

00:33:59.300 Like, you want tickets or what do you need?

00:34:00.480 And I was like, I don't think we can make it, dude.

00:34:02.200 This is super last minute.

00:34:03.580 And then in the morning, we woke up and I was like, all right, we'll go.

00:34:07.240 You know what I mean?

00:34:07.600 We just were like, we got to do it.

00:34:08.600 Like, it's a 35-minute flight to Vegas.

00:34:10.840 I was like, we got to go.

00:34:12.060 And we had an absolute amazing time.

00:34:15.980 It is one of the greatest visual and audio shows I've seen in my lifetime.

00:34:23.860 The Sphere is, I mean, it's worth every single dime they overspent on it.

00:34:28.460 And they're losing money.

00:34:29.440 I think they're hemorrhaging money, that place.

00:34:30.860 Yeah, that's what it says.

00:34:32.600 I know that to build the crane alone that they used to build the Sphere, and check me on this, but there was like, it took 100 trucks just to bring the stuff the crane is made out of.

00:34:49.800 It was like the fourth biggest crane in the world.

00:34:52.580 I think it's from Belgium or Berlin.

00:34:55.920 Well, I mean Berlin.

00:34:56.940 It took that many trucks just to bring the pieces of the crane, and then it took a couple of weeks to put the crane together.

00:35:06.140 Yeah, who builds, what crane builds the crane?

00:35:08.960 Yeah.

00:35:09.520 What crane was first?

00:35:10.820 You know what I mean?

00:35:11.540 Yeah.

00:35:12.040 What's the first crane that built the cranes? 0.57

00:35:14.580 So true.

00:35:15.180 At a certain point, you're like, oh, we need a crane to build this crane.

00:35:17.400 And then what crane is building that?

00:35:19.540 Back on the crane gang.

00:35:22.540 That's right.

00:35:22.860 And you know who built it first.

00:35:25.400 Come on.

00:35:26.940 You know who built the first crane.

00:35:28.860 The first crane?

00:35:33.100 I don't know.

00:35:34.680 The Egyptians.

00:35:35.620 Oh, they did?

00:35:36.320 Yeah.

00:35:36.680 That's how the pyramids were built.

00:35:37.660 They built cranes.

00:35:38.880 Of course they did.

00:35:39.720 Yeah. 1.00

00:35:40.120 Yeah, what the fuck? 1.00

00:35:40.920 People are always like, who moved these stones? 1.00

00:35:42.860 A crane. 1.00

00:35:43.680 Yeah, you idiot. 1.00

00:35:44.460 What the fuck? 1.00

00:35:45.180 What the fuck? 1.00

00:35:46.020 A guy didn't do it. 1.00

00:35:47.160 They built a crane.

00:35:48.000 Dude, I love how every white person I meet is like, oh, the pyramids, aliens. 1.00

00:35:52.500 Every Egyptian person I meet is just like, oh, these are some fucking. 1.00

00:35:57.680 My dad. 1.00

00:35:58.500 My dad loves ancient aliens.

00:36:00.540 That's his favorite thing on earth.

00:36:01.740 Yeah.

00:36:02.140 He's obsessed.

00:36:03.560 And I say that on stage. 0.85

00:36:04.740 I say he loves ancient aliens, which is crazy because he hates illegal aliens.

00:36:09.000 And I said, dad, you can't pick and choose.

00:36:12.240 They both built the pyramids, man.

00:36:13.580 You got to be careful.

00:36:15.700 He's obsessed.

00:36:16.740 Why are white?

00:36:17.320 Yeah. 0.99

00:36:17.540 Whites are so obsessed with aliens. 0.97

00:36:19.280 It's our number one thing. 0.98

00:36:20.820 I think it's because like a lot of whites are so comfortable.

00:36:26.400 Too comfortable.

00:36:27.280 Right.

00:36:27.520 They're too comfortable. 1.00

00:36:28.260 So it's like you start to worry about other shit. 0.99

00:36:30.800 That's true. 0.99

00:36:31.660 It's like how you feel.

00:36:33.180 You start to worry about, oh, alien.

00:36:35.680 Like, you know, is there anybody else out there?

00:36:38.400 Like, it's definitely, those are creature comforts.

00:36:41.240 Yeah.

00:36:41.380 When you get too comfortable, you start to worry about things that you have no familiarity with.

00:36:46.980 That you're just going to make, you kind of make it up.

00:36:49.140 Yeah.

00:36:49.540 Because it feels like it gives you something to do.

00:36:51.620 Right.

00:36:51.980 If you don't, if you don't work, let's say you, you're raising, you know, you're raising a family.

00:36:56.780 You don't have a job.

00:36:58.820 You're stay-at-home mom or dad.

00:37:01.860 There's a downtime when they're napping.

00:37:03.800 And what are you doing midday?

00:37:06.400 You're thinking about aliens.

00:37:08.280 You're bored.

00:37:09.020 You're around your house.

00:37:09.840 Your vibrator is broken or whatever.

00:37:11.760 Well, it's not charged.

00:37:12.860 Yeah.

00:37:13.360 You got to charge that thing.

00:37:14.460 You can't keep uncharging that.

00:37:16.400 Put that, plug it in.

00:37:18.240 Get back to square one.

00:37:20.260 You believe in aliens, don't you, though?

00:37:22.060 You got to.

00:37:24.020 You think I have to?

00:37:26.580 Let me think.

00:37:27.820 I don't, I think you got to believe in something.

00:37:32.380 What's out there?

00:37:33.180 I mean, I think we, the crazy thing is what an anomaly humans are, right?

00:37:43.140 Yeah, this is weird.

00:37:44.640 We're the weird ones.

00:37:45.600 Like, if you look in the forest or whatever, they're no, they all know each other.

00:37:49.900 They know what they're doing.

00:37:51.500 They know what team they're on.

00:37:53.340 Sometimes they'll fight.

00:37:54.360 Sometimes they'll cuddle or whatever.

00:37:55.700 Sometimes they have that video where, like, that little duck is on that badger's back or whatever.

00:38:01.200 Oh, yeah.

00:38:01.860 But, like, they know what they're doing.

00:38:03.740 And then we show up.

00:38:05.360 Like, we're the strange mammal. 0.98

00:38:07.420 Like, if you were in the woods and you saw a bear, right, like, come out of his hole or whatever, take a couple of pills, cry, jerk off. 0.98

00:38:18.420 Right. 0.95

00:38:19.320 You know, and then get on.

00:38:20.680 Yeah.

00:38:21.520 Transition and then get on a computer. 1.00

00:38:25.380 You'd be like, this fucking alien. 1.00

00:38:27.900 Yeah, this is an alien. 1.00

00:38:28.900 This is an alien.

00:38:30.240 So maybe we are the alien, you know, like.

00:38:32.800 Well, we are.

00:38:33.380 We are the alien to something else for sure.

00:38:35.460 Well, certainly to nature.

00:38:37.060 Yeah.

00:38:37.380 To the rest of nature, it seems like we're the outlier.

00:38:40.100 Like, to fish.

00:38:40.940 I always think about fish.

00:38:41.940 We have to be so annoying to fish.

00:38:43.880 They're stepping in their house.

00:38:45.680 And then they have to get out of their own house.

00:38:47.500 Oh, yeah.

00:38:48.120 Somebody gets in your house.

00:38:49.060 Imagine you just have to leave.

00:38:50.360 Yeah.

00:38:50.940 And then when they're done enjoying your house, then you get to come back.

00:38:54.820 Imagine they show up.

00:38:56.180 It's like pee in your house. 0.91

00:38:57.680 Yeah, pissing in your house. 0.93

00:38:58.260 They just come and piss right in your front. 1.00

00:39:01.800 Hey. 0.96

00:39:02.540 And you have to disappear because they're 10 times your size.

00:39:05.860 Yeah.

00:39:06.780 Yeah.

00:39:07.180 That's another thing about us being so comfortable because there's nothing trying to kill us all the time except corporations.

00:39:15.080 And I say for us, except for us.

00:39:16.600 Except for us. 0.99

00:39:17.260 We're the best at killing ourselves. 0.94

00:39:18.540 We're the only species that works really hard on killing ourselves. 0.88

00:39:21.560 Yeah.

00:39:22.000 With everything we consume, food, alcohol, cigarettes, drugs.

00:39:27.420 We're trying to get rid of ourselves.

00:39:29.940 Even the cooter's bad now.

00:39:31.400 There was a study the other day.

00:39:32.900 Was it rotten?

00:39:33.960 No.

00:39:34.320 It's just like someone was coming.

00:39:35.680 They tested a woman's cooter or whatever. 1.00

00:39:38.640 And it was like 20 proof or something.

00:39:40.360 Where was that at?

00:39:41.680 20 proof?

00:39:42.780 Was that at Indiana University?

00:39:44.220 Yeah.

00:39:44.320 I think it was in Bloomington.

00:39:45.380 That sounds like an IU thing.

00:39:46.860 Yeah.

00:39:47.960 20 proof is bad.

00:39:49.060 That's pretty, that's heavy.

00:39:51.720 875,000 square feet of space.

00:39:53.760 That's in the venue.

00:39:57.140 Man.

00:39:58.760 Oh, yeah.

00:39:59.120 COVID delayed it.

00:39:59.920 I remember that.

00:40:00.460 And U2 was number one.

00:40:01.620 U2 started.

00:40:02.200 Who's there now?

00:40:02.900 The Eagles are coming.

00:40:04.000 Something like that, right?

00:40:04.540 Eagles are coming.

00:40:04.980 Yeah.

00:40:05.200 Eagles are about to do it.

00:40:06.120 Yeah.

00:40:06.280 Wait.

00:40:06.520 Tell me, though.

00:40:07.120 Did you love, did you really enjoy the show?

00:40:09.020 And have you been a dead fan?

00:40:10.240 Do you like the dead?

00:40:10.960 I haven't been a dead fan.

00:40:11.880 I probably know like six or seven other songs probably, right?

00:40:14.560 Yeah, but that's, that's, so you like them.

00:40:16.340 That's a pretty good amount.

00:40:16.700 Yeah.

00:40:17.120 Yeah.

00:40:17.360 Yeah.

00:40:17.640 I like them.

00:40:18.360 My brother is a huge Grateful Dead fan, but he didn't want to maybe see Dead and Co.

00:40:24.360 because he didn't want to spoil like, you know, he's like a Jerry, you know, he's like.

00:40:29.220 He was, yeah, he liked Jerry.

00:40:30.820 Right.

00:40:31.260 And so, but he wanted to go.

00:40:33.660 He lives in, by Mount Zion.

00:40:35.200 So we met over there and I wanted to go and we wanted to do something together.

00:40:38.660 And, yeah, I think I love that they have so much art.

00:40:43.620 There's so many little things you know about the Grateful Dead that since they have a lot

00:40:48.940 of cool and unique art and stuff, they're able to make a lot of neat stuff to put into

00:40:53.060 the visuals, right?

00:40:54.500 Whereas if you were a band, if you're like, you know, GWAR maybe or something or Sinead O'Connor.

00:41:05.760 Sinead O'Connor, Joe, just see why somebody you're not, I don't know if you're going to

00:41:11.780 be able to fill that space with enough intrigue, you know, and history and history.

00:41:17.440 Right.

00:41:17.780 Right.

00:41:18.000 It almost, you almost need something that's a bit historical maybe, or something that's

00:41:22.400 extremely artistic, like a group that has a lot of ambiance that comes with it.

00:41:27.520 Right.

00:41:27.640 You can't do a solo artist would be a little hard there unless they have such a rich story

00:41:33.340 to tell.

00:41:33.720 Right.

00:41:33.960 Like a Michael Buble or something, you know, I don't know, but if it were just Christmas 0.91

00:41:37.140 and they were able to make really cool Christmas shit in there, then that's a way to do it.

00:41:40.320 Yeah. 0.98

00:41:40.340 Booby at Christmas would be nice though.

00:41:41.660 Yeah.

00:41:41.960 He is really talented, that guy.

00:41:43.680 People love him at Christmas.

00:41:45.520 No, I think.

00:41:45.940 Rest of the year, whatever.

00:41:46.860 Well, yeah, no, I don't need him.

00:41:48.380 I don't, I really don't need him.

00:41:49.660 Yeah.

00:41:50.020 Boob later, dude. 1.00

00:41:53.780 That's pretty bad.

00:41:54.580 But what else did I think, I thought it was amazing how like, well, there's like these

00:41:59.700 things in the seats called like haptics or whatever, and so sometimes your seat will

00:42:03.260 move, right?

00:42:03.920 So some of the seats, I think like 10,000 of the seats.

00:42:07.540 They have haptics.

00:42:08.400 Right.

00:42:08.660 And they, you know, so they'll have like a reaction or, so that's kind of crazy.

00:42:13.100 I thought it was interesting how sometimes, um, well, you get there right in the beginning

00:42:18.880 and it just looks like a, a futuristic, like kind of cage or something you're in.

00:42:25.340 Yeah.

00:42:25.820 Like a, like a inner workings of a machine.

00:42:29.020 Yeah.

00:42:29.360 It's not just like you're looking at a screen.

00:42:31.060 It looks like, um, robot guts.

00:42:33.640 Yeah.

00:42:34.020 Or like inside of a video game.

00:42:35.720 Yeah.

00:42:35.860 Something like video game.

00:42:36.820 You went into like a space world or something and then it all kind of starts to happen and

00:42:42.920 they don't give you everything at once.

00:42:44.380 They don't show you all their tricks at once.

00:42:46.020 No, they, they roll it out slow.

00:42:47.780 That's a great shot.

00:42:48.900 Wow.

00:42:49.860 That was you too.

00:42:50.880 Probably I bet.

00:42:51.880 Cause that wasn't, uh, that what's wild about it is they give it so much dimension, you know,

00:42:58.080 through, through, uh, through tricks of the, of the LEDs.

00:43:02.440 And it really is kind of mind boggling gets people.

00:43:05.000 I guess people get really dizzy.

00:43:06.660 Like some people get, they have to take them out of there cause they get so dizzy from the,

00:43:10.260 the movement.

00:43:11.420 Cause the movement is crazy.

00:43:12.560 It physically like it moves so heavily that I think people get disoriented.

00:43:18.080 Yeah.

00:43:18.520 Oh, there's times where like the way that they do, you're like, you feel like the whole

00:43:23.200 thing is moving through space or time.

00:43:25.400 Like you're the entire venue feels like you're moving with it.

00:43:28.840 Yeah.

00:43:29.120 Yeah.

00:43:29.520 I think they said people with like, uh, kind of like, like same thing with strobes, like

00:43:34.420 people that have heart problems or high blood pressure or something, epileptics, or if

00:43:38.340 you're French Canadian, you're not supposed to go there because it's dangerous for those 1.00

00:43:41.880 kind of people, you know?

00:43:43.300 And that's, it's just a historical, unfortunate truth.

00:43:46.780 You get, they get sick easier. 1.00

00:43:48.500 Fuck. 1.00

00:43:49.120 Yeah. 1.00

00:43:49.360 It's sad, but it was a beautiful time, man.

00:43:51.700 It was a beautiful time.

00:43:52.740 I enjoyed it so much and it was long and like, you really kind of get a story and I loved it.

00:43:58.180 Um, and I thought what was really cool too, at the grid, at the dead show was like, if

00:44:01.680 you went down to the street, if you went down to just the stage where the stage is, and if

00:44:08.680 there was nothing on the back and nothing on the screen, the stage only had a few lights

00:44:14.220 on it.

00:44:14.520 It literally looked like you were at a backyard concert.

00:44:16.240 Yeah.

00:44:16.340 It's really crazy.

00:44:17.280 It's, it's like, it's so minimalistic and then so grand at the exact same time.

00:44:22.080 I mean, the stage, it, it had like five lights behind the guys or six, like, I mean, small,

00:44:29.140 small lights.

00:44:31.020 Uh, and then, oh, that's you too.

00:44:33.840 That's you too.

00:44:34.360 Yeah.

00:44:35.640 And then it had a very, uh, and so if the screen was off, it literally looked like you

00:44:40.680 were at a backyard show.

00:44:41.860 Yeah.

00:44:42.780 Like a, somebody's, like a band was playing in somebody's backyard.

00:44:46.300 Um, but yeah, I would totally recommend it.

00:44:48.340 I heard somebody refer to themselves as a sphere head after the, like, I'll never see 1.00

00:44:52.640 a show anywhere else.

00:44:53.480 Now I'm a sphere head. 0.85

00:44:54.640 It's pretty limiting.

00:44:55.620 Yeah, definitely limiting, but it was interesting.

00:44:57.360 I'd never heard, it was like, I'd never thought like I'll only see a show at a certain venue.

00:45:02.880 Yeah.

00:45:03.620 Dedicating to a venue is tough.

00:45:04.980 Yeah.

00:45:05.520 Because you're only going to get what you're going to get.

00:45:07.220 Right.

00:45:07.300 But I mean, you know, that's kind of life, isn't it?

00:45:09.160 You're going to get what you're going to get.

00:45:10.240 Yeah.

00:45:10.700 So if you become a sphere head, you might as well soak it up. 1.00

00:45:13.460 Yeah.

00:45:14.360 Yeah.

00:45:14.740 I, but, um, what else?

00:45:16.160 Yeah.

00:45:16.260 What does this crane say?

00:45:16.900 The fourth largest crawler crane in the world.

00:45:20.340 Wow.

00:45:21.080 That's the crane.

00:45:22.320 A 580 foot tall crane.

00:45:26.360 Man, imagine being Sarins.

00:45:28.440 It's made by a company called Sarins.

00:45:30.020 Imagine being David Sarins.

00:45:32.240 That's your crane.

00:45:34.360 Wow.

00:45:35.800 What does your family do?

00:45:37.120 We're crane guys.

00:45:38.580 Oh, big money.

00:45:39.760 We're crane guys.

00:45:41.160 Have you ever seen the Costco guys?

00:45:42.420 Have you ever seen these two kids?

00:45:43.440 Uh-uh.

00:45:43.940 The son and his dad?

00:45:45.160 We're Costco guys.

00:45:46.900 They go to Costco and they just eat stuff and they review it.

00:45:49.280 Oh.

00:45:49.780 Yeah.

00:45:49.940 The world is burning.

00:45:51.360 Uh, you know, the Statue of Liberty can fit inside of the sphere.

00:45:55.100 Wow.

00:45:55.880 And the sphere is interesting.

00:45:57.000 It's right when you walk in, it does feel, the whole thing feels like a presentation kind

00:46:01.200 of, you know?

00:46:01.680 Oh, yeah.

00:46:01.960 Like even the, the, the, the original interior is so neat.

00:46:04.640 You're like, you don't just walk right into the, like venue kind of, you know, you walk

00:46:08.640 into like, like a normal venue would be like this other, you know, like the hallways and

00:46:12.940 stuff and the, the, the four, uh.

00:46:16.520 Yeah.

00:46:16.840 Yeah.

00:46:16.880 Wow.

00:46:17.200 2.2 billion.

00:46:18.500 Just, I mean.

00:46:19.500 Yeah.

00:46:19.620 Look at the Statue of Liberty.

00:46:20.620 Look at the little tiny girl.

00:46:22.080 Oh, dude. 1.00

00:46:22.660 All the bitches are in there. 1.00

00:46:23.780 Her and all her friends. 1.00

00:46:25.380 Yeah.

00:46:26.120 Well, not as much anymore.

00:46:27.240 They don't talk to Sheila.

00:46:28.440 Yeah.

00:46:28.780 They got, she, they got into a big fight, I guess.

00:46:30.980 Oh.

00:46:31.300 You've been to the Statue of Liberty?

00:46:33.180 Yeah.

00:46:33.540 I think I have.

00:46:34.280 Did you go up in her head?

00:46:36.000 Yeah.

00:46:36.720 Oh, yeah.

00:46:37.220 I went up there, dude.

00:46:38.060 She was just pissed at her ex about something.

00:46:40.060 Hmm.

00:46:40.820 When I was there.

00:46:41.600 Right.

00:46:42.600 I actually was fine.

00:46:43.480 I think I was, I, when I went and visited her, she was in her hoe phase. 1.00

00:46:45.960 So she was having a good time. 0.99

00:46:47.220 Oh, damn. 1.00

00:46:47.780 She was spreading love. 1.00

00:46:48.820 Yeah.

00:46:51.240 I heard that's why France sent her here, dude. 0.81

00:46:53.360 Uh-huh.

00:46:53.520 She got a little out of control. 1.00

00:46:55.820 To being too much for France, by the way, because they're, they're all whores. 1.00

00:46:59.540 That's, that's. 1.00

00:47:01.480 Oh.

00:47:02.380 Paris got ranked the sluttiest city in the world.

00:47:04.460 Uh-uh.

00:47:04.920 A couple years in a row.

00:47:05.800 Yeah.

00:47:06.000 Back to back. 1.00

00:47:06.400 Fuck, dude. 1.00

00:47:06.600 What am I doing in Nashville? 1.00

00:47:08.660 Well, you got to go to Paris.

00:47:09.460 I mean, do you speak French?

00:47:10.600 Mm-mm.

00:47:11.560 But being from the South, being from where you're from, people do speak.

00:47:15.900 A little bit of French out of New Orleans.

00:47:16.540 A little bit of French, right?

00:47:17.520 Yeah.

00:47:17.660 A little bit of like.

00:47:18.740 Les ailes bon temps rouler.

00:47:20.840 That's what I'm saying.

00:47:21.500 See, that's not, that's, you're halfway there, baby.

00:47:23.840 Let's go.

00:47:26.240 That just means to let the good times roll.

00:47:28.760 That's a great thing to do.

00:47:29.580 Well, there you go.

00:47:30.000 That's all you need to say.

00:47:30.640 It's not bad, but it's like, this guy just keeps saying let the good times roll. 1.00

00:47:35.340 This guy is mentally retarded, dude. 1.00

00:47:37.760 Yeah, but also welcome to the party. 1.00

00:47:39.160 Maybe they think you're, you're worth the fun.

00:47:41.700 That's all he knows.

00:47:42.400 And that's okay.

00:47:43.280 This guy does it.

00:47:44.420 Mm-hmm.

00:47:44.700 Um, but even seeing the sphere from your hotel room, I can't even explain how it feels like

00:47:51.020 something fell off of another planet.

00:47:53.940 All right.

00:47:54.200 That looks alien.

00:47:55.120 And landed here.

00:47:56.080 That's the most alien part is just seeing it.

00:47:59.020 Yeah, it does.

00:47:59.760 Yeah.

00:48:00.000 And walking up to it feels kind of daunting.

00:48:01.720 It feels very, uh, like a millennium falcony.

00:48:05.840 Like it's this big, daunting, intricate.

00:48:08.620 Yeah.

00:48:08.940 It is true.

00:48:09.380 That does feel foreign.

00:48:11.480 It feels foreign.

00:48:12.220 And I don't, I don't mean that in a bad way.

00:48:13.740 I don't mean that in a negative way.

00:48:15.700 Yeah.

00:48:16.040 Because I know the word foreign people are really taken to heart these days.

00:48:18.840 Most sexually active cities in the world.

00:48:20.140 What'd I tell you?

00:48:20.740 Paris, baby.

00:48:21.640 Wow.

00:48:21.860 Number one.

00:48:22.720 Number one.

00:48:24.460 They're back-to-back champs.

00:48:26.200 But Paris has also been referred to as a queer city.

00:48:28.840 Well, yeah, we say that.

00:48:30.200 Oh, yeah, that's true.

00:48:30.800 Yeah.

00:48:32.060 LA is number two.

00:48:33.260 No way.

00:48:34.160 California has the highest reported rates of, uh, Gennar.

00:48:37.600 Oh.

00:48:38.440 Syphilis.

00:48:39.200 Yeah.

00:48:39.480 Syphilis.

00:48:40.000 Congenital syphilis.

00:48:40.940 Congenital syphilis.

00:48:41.980 Uh, and other piece of data likewise provides that young individuals that come from more than

00:48:47.360 five out of every 10 chlamydia infections and more than 87% of those are

00:48:51.840 youth of color.

00:48:53.420 Hey.

00:48:55.280 Hmm.

00:48:57.080 London.

00:48:58.660 I really would not think London would be high on the... 0.59

00:49:02.520 Yeah, I think British women are more casual about sex. 1.00

00:49:05.580 I think Europe probably is as a whole, right?

00:49:07.700 Everybody in Europe.

00:49:08.700 Yeah.

00:49:09.000 We're a little staunch.

00:49:10.280 But I guess that means that if LA's number two, we're kind of like a European city.

00:49:14.580 Berlin.

00:49:16.120 Yeah. 0.99

00:49:17.560 I imagine Germany, oh, sex work, homosexual sex have always can, uh, had 1.00

00:49:21.680 coexisting the idea of commercialization in Berlin. 0.97

00:49:24.340 Yeah.

00:49:24.880 The problem with that is, you know, in Berlin, you got to kind of be a part of their, what

00:49:33.620 they want you to do, you know?

00:49:35.360 And I don't know if you know anything about that stuff, but in Germany, it's a little too 0.95

00:49:38.660 much.

00:49:39.120 It's pretty intense.

00:49:40.140 Yeah.

00:49:40.300 It's heavy. 1.00

00:49:40.860 They're perverts. 1.00

00:49:41.620 There are a lot of perverts. 0.99

00:49:42.700 Yeah. 0.98

00:49:43.140 Yeah.

00:49:44.080 New York City.

00:49:45.020 I could see that.

00:49:46.200 Oh, yeah.

00:49:47.100 In New York though, it's just like, if you like, you got to bring all your stuff with

00:49:52.140 you in the morning, even if you're planning on having sex at any point over, you know,

00:49:55.740 it's like. 0.89

00:49:56.180 You got to pack for sex. 0.98

00:49:57.180 Yeah. 1.00

00:49:57.380 You got to pack for sex. 0.99

00:49:58.540 You got a hammock. 0.99

00:49:59.600 You got some condoms.

00:50:00.860 Whatever.

00:50:01.000 It's like, Jesus Christ.

00:50:02.260 Yeah.

00:50:02.400 You got to have a change of underwear and socks.

00:50:04.040 Yeah. 1.00

00:50:04.260 You got to bring all that shit in here to a fucking restaurant. 1.00

00:50:07.740 Some girl's got a camel back on because she has to fucking walk back to Brooklyn. 1.00

00:50:12.060 It's just, there's no other crazy city to try to have some, to meet up with somebody 0.99

00:50:17.220 then in fucking New York. 1.00

00:50:18.420 It's ridiculous. 1.00

00:50:19.360 Fucking in New York is, yeah, that's got to be a cumbersome adventure. 1.00

00:50:21.880 Oh, fucking in New York is for the birds. 1.00

00:50:23.980 I think that's why people get into relationships here because they're just like, oh, fuck, 1.00

00:50:27.100 I'm not going home. 0.99

00:50:27.900 I don't feel like walking.

00:50:28.980 Yeah.

00:50:29.260 It's too far.

00:50:31.340 I'll marry you.

00:50:32.220 It's too far.

00:50:34.020 Dude, Trump.

00:50:35.520 Yeah, man. 0.99

00:50:36.060 Insane.

00:50:36.460 Where were you when Trump got shot, man?

00:50:38.160 I'm not going to tell you.

00:50:38.920 That's if the government's listening, just in case.

00:50:40.600 I don't want anybody to hear.

00:50:41.920 Where was I?

00:50:42.780 I was, I was, I was at the, oh, I was at the house.

00:50:49.120 I was at the house and you know what's so funny?

00:50:53.240 My, my, my instinct was like, I'm not even kidding.

00:50:56.940 That's what time we're in now.

00:50:58.120 I thought it was AI at first.

00:50:59.420 I thought this is a, someone's pulling a prank on people.

00:51:02.440 I was like, someone is a, doing a very intricate coordinated prank.

00:51:06.220 Cause AI is that good.

00:51:07.500 They could make that up.

00:51:08.820 But then I kept, you know, then obviously it got exposed and it was real.

00:51:11.740 But for a long, I'm not kidding. 0.97

00:51:13.120 That's how fucked the world is that I thought maybe that was fake or that it was, this was 0.98

00:51:16.840 all made up. 0.99

00:51:18.980 Yeah.

00:51:19.500 It was, it was a trip.

00:51:20.740 It still might be.

00:51:22.440 Still might be.

00:51:22.960 Yeah.

00:51:23.180 I mean, who, we don't know.

00:51:24.080 We weren't there.

00:51:24.660 I wasn't there.

00:51:25.260 I have no idea what's going on in Pennsylvania.

00:51:26.960 That's how so weird the media is these days.

00:51:28.720 Like if you don't know and you weren't there, if you really step back for a second, you're

00:51:31.060 like, who knows what, you know.

00:51:32.680 How could I know?

00:51:33.220 How could I know that that's real?

00:51:34.280 I don't know.

00:51:34.860 I mean, could have, could have not.

00:51:37.120 Took it, took the hit though.

00:51:38.600 Oh, it was crazy, dude.

00:51:41.060 Yeah.

00:51:41.500 That image.

00:51:42.920 Him yelling.

00:51:43.940 Fight.

00:51:44.440 Yeah.

00:51:44.660 Fight.

00:51:45.580 My God, dude.

00:51:46.980 I didn't know.

00:51:47.980 Put that on the American flag.

00:51:50.660 You know, put that right where the stars are.

00:51:52.960 It's, that's the wildest thing I think I've ever seen is a guy gets shot and then champions,

00:52:00.400 like a, like a, like a guy who tore his ACL on the field and is doing the, yeah, yeah.

00:52:06.140 I mean, that image is just insane.

00:52:08.780 The craziest thing is I've seen the, a guy on the right at the UFC fights like seven times.

00:52:14.880 I was going to say he's his, like, he's his number one guy, that guy.

00:52:17.460 He looks so familiar.

00:52:18.780 It's like so many things were crazy about this.

00:52:22.040 Um, I was, let me think, where was I at?

00:52:25.820 Oh yeah.

00:52:26.140 So I was in, yeah, I was in Vegas.

00:52:27.760 We're waiting, we're going to go to the show.

00:52:29.440 I went to watch Diplo was playing at, um, like a day party somewhere.

00:52:33.400 So we stopped, I stopped by there.

00:52:35.480 Um, he comes walking up, he's going on stage.

00:52:38.680 He's like, dude, guess they shot Trump.

00:52:42.160 Diplo told you that?

00:52:43.080 Swear to God.

00:52:43.780 He goes, they shot Trump.

00:52:45.180 Yeah.

00:52:45.520 And I was like, what is it?

00:52:47.120 A new song or something?

00:52:48.280 He goes, no, they shot Trump. 1.00

00:52:51.680 I was like, no fucking way, dude. 0.99

00:52:53.980 I mean, and nobody had said anything and he's like, yeah, man, they shot him. 0.98

00:52:58.580 And he goes, oh, this is, I'm sorry. 0.98

00:53:00.140 He goes, and my fucking dad just walked like, like the door was closed, walking out to the 0.99

00:53:05.580 patio and he didn't know. 1.00

00:53:06.600 And he fucking walked right into it, dude. 0.98

00:53:09.680 And it was like, it was the same thing. 0.99

00:53:12.380 I mean, it is, it is just as disturbing.

00:53:14.300 I agree.

00:53:15.180 Look, you got to care about the man closest in your life for sure.

00:53:17.860 But it was just so funny.

00:53:19.280 He told me those things back to back, dude.

00:53:21.160 And I was like, those aren't exactly the same, but, um, you know, I'd love to meet your,

00:53:25.180 I'd love to meet your dad.

00:53:26.100 I hope he's feeling okay.

00:53:27.480 Right.

00:53:27.800 Um, similar injury.

00:53:29.260 Yeah.

00:53:29.580 And then he just got up there and started getting the party.

00:53:33.200 Party keeps going.

00:53:34.640 But so that was just kind of strange.

00:53:36.780 And then, oh, he showed me the video on his phone.

00:53:39.320 Of the kid, of the, uh, of, of the shooting.

00:53:41.700 Yeah.

00:53:42.260 And the video started and he wouldn't forward the video.

00:53:44.500 You could tell it was like a long video.

00:53:45.940 Yeah.

00:53:46.140 You like skip forward a little bit.

00:53:47.180 Yeah.

00:53:47.480 But it was nice.

00:53:48.180 I'm like, is Diplo really giving me, me this much time to stand here?

00:53:51.040 Like, he's just got like, I feel bad.

00:53:52.900 I'm wasting his time.

00:53:53.560 I'm like, I'll move the cursor, but it's his phone.

00:53:55.840 Yeah.

00:53:55.980 You're not allowed to move the cursor on somebody else's phone.

00:53:57.720 That's interesting.

00:53:58.480 That's so flagrant to touch someone else's phone.

00:54:01.080 Oh, what was the kid's name that did it?

00:54:02.820 What?

00:54:02.980 They got him right.

00:54:03.580 They got the, he's dead and gone.

00:54:05.380 And Thomas, Thomas Crooks, Tommy Crooks.

00:54:08.120 It sounds like it.

00:54:09.280 Yeah.

00:54:09.580 It sounds like he would do it.

00:54:10.940 Yeah.

00:54:11.140 Tommy Crooks.

00:54:12.140 Who did it?

00:54:12.820 Thomas Crooks.

00:54:13.740 Yeah.

00:54:14.020 But then you see a picture of the kid and you're like, what?

00:54:18.720 No.

00:54:19.120 Well, one of the wildest things is, um, that people are saying there's no way.

00:54:27.260 Did you see the diagram of where it happened?

00:54:29.440 No, no.

00:54:30.720 Was it really, what?

00:54:31.540 Is it intricate?

00:54:32.680 Bring that up.

00:54:33.680 The diagram of like who, where he shot him from.

00:54:35.520 The layout of what it looked like.

00:54:38.000 It's like.

00:54:39.980 Oh, they were, he was right next to the.

00:54:43.080 Right.

00:54:43.560 And this is like, Trump was speaking like off this way.

00:54:46.620 Right.

00:54:46.920 That's why he got his, uh, that right ear.

00:54:48.700 Right.

00:54:48.980 Yeah.

00:54:49.340 Yeah.

00:54:49.720 Yeah.

00:54:49.860 Go to that.

00:54:50.500 Let me see if that helps a little bit.

00:54:52.020 Wow.

00:54:52.560 Location law enforcement.

00:54:53.720 Snipers on roof.

00:54:56.060 Stage where Trump was speaking.

00:54:57.960 What were the snipers doing while they, they couldn't see the gunman?

00:55:01.120 Bro.

00:55:01.600 It looks like the only build, the only roof that was close to them was that one.

00:55:06.340 So how did they not?

00:55:07.140 And people were saying, you've seen the videos where people were like, Hey, there's a guy right

00:55:10.600 there.

00:55:11.200 And they didn't see it.

00:55:12.280 Huh?

00:55:13.600 A little weird. 1.00

00:55:14.580 This fucking dude. 1.00

00:55:15.560 Now this could be easily an actor. 1.00

00:55:17.700 That's me.

00:55:18.380 That's, that is me.

00:55:19.380 Me with one of those silicone masks on from.

00:55:25.280 It's like the Guy Fieri hat that you buy at the store that comes with the hair.

00:55:31.740 What?

00:55:32.260 He's, his face is going, well, he was, he was up there.

00:55:36.340 We was yelling.

00:55:37.380 They didn't know.

00:55:38.400 We kept saying, dude, he's on the roof, dude.

00:55:40.760 They wasn't listening.

00:55:41.700 I mean, you could, that mouth.

00:55:43.960 We could play it, but that's exactly what it is, I think.

00:55:47.480 Play 20 seconds of it.

00:55:50.220 Couldn't see him, but we could hear him.

00:55:53.460 So we walked up.

00:55:54.660 Oh, it is a fake hat.

00:55:55.580 It is what it was.

00:55:56.120 And probably five to seven minutes of Trump speaking.

00:55:59.320 I'm estimating here.

00:56:00.080 I have no idea.

00:56:00.800 He's got chewing too.

00:56:02.060 Big old dip.

00:56:02.660 Yeah, he got chew stuck in his neck.

00:56:03.880 And we noticed the guy crawling, you know, bear crawling up the roof of the building beside us, 50 feet away from us.

00:56:13.900 So we're standing there, you know, we're pointing, we're pointing at the guy crawling up the roof.

00:56:18.480 And he had a gun, right?

00:56:19.400 He had a rifle.

00:56:20.240 A rifle.

00:56:20.440 We could clearly see him with a rifle.

00:56:22.420 Absolutely.

00:56:22.940 And I called him out and no one did anything.

00:56:25.420 The police are down there running around on the ground.

00:56:28.140 We're like, hey, man, there's a guy on the roof with a rifle.

00:56:31.740 And the police were like, huh, what?

00:56:33.320 You know, like, like they didn't know what was going on.

00:56:35.720 You know, we're like, hey, right here on the roof.

00:56:37.400 We can see him from right here.

00:56:38.740 We see him.

00:56:39.380 You know, he's, he's crawling.

00:56:40.800 The police were, huh, what?

00:56:42.920 When have the cops ever been like, huh, what?

00:56:44.880 I'm like, why is Trump still speaking?

00:56:46.740 Why have they not pulled him off the stage?

00:56:48.520 I'm standing there pointing at him for, you know, two, three minutes.

00:56:52.940 Secret Service is looking at us.

00:56:54.340 Okay, stop it.

00:56:55.440 I'm going to call this dude out.

00:56:56.420 Go do something, dude.

00:56:57.880 Yeah, what are you doing?

00:56:59.200 You're pointing at him for two minutes. 0.99

00:57:00.220 What are you fucking just finishing a beer? 1.00

00:57:02.760 Fucking 50 feet away. 1.00

00:57:05.560 God gives you one chance to be a fucking hero. 1.00

00:57:09.260 And instead you pop open another fucking bush light, dude. 1.00

00:57:13.700 Both of these gentlemen don't, are just interesting creatures. 0.99

00:57:17.460 These are actors, dude.

00:57:18.720 Yeah, dude. 1.00

00:57:19.500 This is a fucking, the backup, dude. 1.00

00:57:22.060 They got this dude off of Teemu, this announcer. 1.00

00:57:25.340 Look what he's even using to interview him.

00:57:26.940 Yeah, it's not even a mop.

00:57:28.960 It's not even a microphone.

00:57:30.420 That's a Swiffer. 0.51

00:57:34.180 Yeah, I don't try.

00:57:35.060 This is very untrustworthy.

00:57:36.580 That's so untrustworthy, dude.

00:57:39.100 I don't like it.

00:57:40.160 But to think though, right?

00:57:41.320 So they secure a perimeter.

00:57:43.100 Imagine seeing, okay, you have a 20-year-old.

00:57:45.140 He walked over there with a rifle bag.

00:57:46.940 He walked like a half a mile, I think it says.

00:57:48.860 And nobody said anything?

00:57:50.720 Yes.

00:57:51.140 That's the part to me that's like. 0.54

00:57:55.420 Half a mile is a long way to walk with a big-ass rifle. 1.00

00:57:57.900 With a fucking rifle. 1.00

00:57:59.480 Now, you are in PA. 1.00

00:58:01.100 It is a Trump rally.

00:58:02.560 Still.

00:58:02.720 The weird thing is you almost expect everybody there to be walking with a rifle.

00:58:06.380 They give you one on the way in.

00:58:07.440 Yeah, yeah.

00:58:07.960 So you kind of expect a lot of that like.

00:58:10.080 Yeah, this is a part of it.

00:58:11.880 Right.

00:58:12.340 Yeah, that's true.

00:58:13.240 Like the ambiance, you know what I'm saying? 0.99

00:58:14.620 Like if it's at a Biden rally, somebody says something with a rifle, you'd be like, oh, what the fuck's going on? 0.97

00:58:18.540 But I feel like in a Trump, it's more like a, you know. 0.98

00:58:21.420 American symbolic.

00:58:22.700 Right.

00:58:22.900 NRA, bring your guns. 0.97

00:58:24.900 Plenty of times.

00:58:25.340 This is crazy.

00:58:26.000 These people are watching him right here.

00:58:27.440 There he is right there.

00:58:29.500 Right there.

00:58:30.060 See him?

00:58:30.940 He's laying down.

00:58:31.780 See him?

00:58:31.980 Yeah, he's laying down.

00:58:38.460 What's happening?

00:58:41.340 Well, they see a guy.

00:58:42.760 That guy's walking with his child.

00:58:46.020 Yeah, look.

00:58:46.820 There he is.

00:58:48.540 Because we have millions and millions.

00:58:50.200 Right there.

00:58:50.760 Oh, my God.

00:58:53.460 Dangerous people.

00:58:54.660 Criminals. 0.99

00:58:56.120 We have criminals.

00:58:57.320 He's on the roof.

00:58:58.700 He's on the roof.

00:59:00.040 Wow.

00:59:00.620 I've never seen this.

00:59:01.820 Right on the roof.

00:59:02.760 It's much tougher than it is.

00:59:05.280 Right on the roof.

00:59:07.380 How on earth are there not cops there?

00:59:09.140 In recorded history, we're the best quarter.

00:59:10.860 In fact, if they could ever put up a chart, I don't know.

00:59:13.000 Okay, that's, I can't even tell what's going on now.

00:59:19.160 That is, yeah.

00:59:19.360 But yeah, this is unbelievable.

00:59:20.280 So yeah, you start to wonder, was this put together?

00:59:23.620 But how do you convince a 20-year-old to just go do something like that, you know?

00:59:28.160 Pack of cigarettes and, you know, I don't know, some gas money.

00:59:31.620 20?

00:59:32.180 Yeah, it's true.

00:59:32.720 Or you could convince me of almost anything at 20.

00:59:35.060 Oh, I hope the photos don't show up.

00:59:37.360 I know that.

00:59:37.900 Yeah, 20s are tough.

00:59:39.420 20s are a time when I, could I be convinced to get on a roof and...

00:59:45.500 That's a good point, huh?

00:59:47.000 I don't, 20?

00:59:47.760 I don't, maybe.

00:59:48.340 I don't know.

00:59:49.520 You're so gullible.

00:59:52.300 It just depends on...

00:59:54.580 Sorry, I was saying it came out that Thomas Crooks was featured in a BlackRock commercial.

00:59:58.380 I saw this.

00:59:59.040 He was in BlackRock in an advertisement for BlackRock.

01:00:01.560 This is where it gets real shaky.

01:00:04.080 This is where it gets real shaky.

01:00:07.240 It's like a commercial for BlackRock.

01:00:09.900 It is?

01:00:10.780 Yeah, it was like a commercial.

01:00:13.000 And he's in school.

01:00:17.400 Look right there.

01:00:18.360 Wow.

01:00:20.300 Wow, so creepy. 1.00

01:00:22.200 Fuck, dude. 1.00

01:00:23.360 Everything gets a little twisted, dude. 1.00

01:00:25.980 But now will Trump be able to speak publicly somewhere again?

01:00:28.740 Like, how are they even going to manage this moving forward?

01:00:30.640 They're going to have to do what they do with the Pope.

01:00:32.180 You know the Pope-mobile?

01:00:33.280 You know the Pope shell?

01:00:34.180 They'll just give him a Trump shell.

01:00:35.600 Put him in a little...

01:00:36.600 Trump tube.

01:00:37.340 Yeah.

01:00:37.860 He'll name it.

01:00:38.480 He'll sell it.

01:00:39.160 Yeah.

01:00:40.260 You better...

01:00:41.020 You need protection.

01:00:42.560 You got to get a Trump tube.

01:00:44.120 They shot me. 0.99

01:00:45.720 They shoot me. 1.00

01:00:46.440 They can shoot you. 1.00

01:00:47.800 Yeah, that. 0.99

01:00:48.520 Like the Pope.

01:00:49.140 Oh, that's cool.

01:00:50.780 It is dope.

01:00:52.220 Why doesn't...

01:00:52.680 Like, Jeep should sell that.

01:00:53.940 You know someone in LA would buy that.

01:00:55.360 Of course, dude.

01:00:56.000 Someone in LA would be cruising around in that.

01:00:57.380 Well, remember that chick that banged the clippers on her? 1.00

01:00:59.940 She wore that visor all the time? 0.99

01:01:01.400 Yeah.

01:01:01.920 Yeah.

01:01:02.420 Yeah.

01:01:02.960 What was that chick's name? 1.00

01:01:04.520 My Little Silly Rabbit. 0.55

01:01:05.900 That girl. 0.91

01:01:06.040 That was so weird.

01:01:07.060 Yeah.

01:01:07.260 So funny.

01:01:08.260 I'm his right-hand man arm.

01:01:11.340 She was brilliant.

01:01:13.180 But, dude, yeah, I just...

01:01:14.100 I mean, I can't even believe it.

01:01:15.700 The craziest thing is...

01:01:17.640 Yeah, that girl. 1.00

01:01:18.500 You're almost like, what the...

01:01:20.020 It almost feels like it's all part of...

01:01:23.080 It's just like...

01:01:23.860 I'm almost not even...

01:01:24.980 I'm surprised, but...

01:01:28.140 It's theater.

01:01:29.780 It all feels like theater.

01:01:31.320 Yeah.

01:01:31.560 We're in the middle of like the craziest play we've ever lived.

01:01:34.920 That's what it feels like.

01:01:36.220 And what act are we in, though?

01:01:37.340 Are we in the third act, do you think?

01:01:38.640 Is this it?

01:01:39.560 I think...

01:01:41.520 You know, it's funny.

01:01:42.600 You think it could be...

01:01:43.640 Like COVID was intermission.

01:01:45.880 COVID was intermission.

01:01:46.940 That's what I call it now.

01:01:48.900 I call that intermission, dude.

01:01:50.240 Dude, I love that.

01:01:51.480 And now we're seeing that the rest of the play is about to play out. 1.00

01:01:54.440 Fuck, now it's on. 0.99

01:01:55.840 This is... 1.00

01:01:56.520 Oh, and there's the lady right there. 1.00

01:01:58.800 Who is that?

01:01:59.280 It says female Shane Gillis.

01:02:00.400 That's just not doing her best work. 1.00

01:02:02.820 What?

01:02:03.220 You see that lady tried to holster her gun a few times? 1.00

01:02:05.300 It just wouldn't go in.

01:02:06.840 Yeah.

01:02:07.360 That's tough.

01:02:09.360 Yeah.

01:02:09.580 I think that's my aunt, Libby.

01:02:11.020 There's no way.

01:02:12.800 She's made bombs here on the show. 1.00

01:02:14.360 You know what Sadie's like? 0.99

01:02:14.720 But this is crazy.

01:02:18.900 Yeah, putting him in the car.

01:02:19.740 Well, the crazy thing is they don't even bring him down to the ground when they're at the podium.

01:02:24.000 No, I know.

01:02:24.520 They stand him up.

01:02:25.220 Stand him up and walk him off. 1.00

01:02:26.880 An easier target, which is crazy.

01:02:28.780 And he keeps saying, let me get my shoes.

01:02:32.140 Well, they were nice.

01:02:33.280 If they're nice and new customs, you do want to get those back on.

01:02:35.640 They probably are, yeah.

01:02:36.800 It's funny.

01:02:39.740 This is what they train for.

01:02:40.960 This is unbelievable.

01:02:42.620 Get him in the car and then they slam on the door.

01:02:45.220 It's like he puts her glasses on.

01:02:46.820 Put your shades on, dude.

01:02:48.720 You don't want to see your eyes.

01:02:50.040 What?

01:02:51.320 That's wild.

01:02:52.380 Can you even imagine, though?

01:02:53.940 Like, your job at Secret Service, there's so many.

01:02:56.620 It's all downtime.

01:02:58.380 I'm also shocked that they wear sunglasses.

01:03:01.040 The Secret Service doesn't have, like, a thing that they can permanently put around their eyes.

01:03:05.500 Taking on and off sunglasses? 0.99

01:03:07.000 Yeah, pain in the ass. 0.99

01:03:08.040 And I lose them all the time. 1.00

01:03:08.900 I lose.

01:03:09.460 The pair I brought in here today, I'm going to lose it.

01:03:11.700 I'm going to leave it here in the studio.

01:03:13.060 Lose them all the time.

01:03:15.360 Yeah, I'm trying.

01:03:16.160 I just, you start to wonder, what is it, a conspiracy?

01:03:18.460 Do they want us to think it's a conspiracy?

01:03:20.640 Because now there's no, like, the guy's been a martyr after the justice system went after him, right?

01:03:25.440 Whatever you think.

01:03:26.320 Like, I've always thought that Trump is a shady businessman, right?

01:03:29.400 Do I think that he's a very personable guy?

01:03:32.140 I don't know.

01:03:32.660 I don't know him well enough.

01:03:33.780 The most interesting thing I've seen him do was when he's turned like that and said fight.

01:03:39.940 It showed, like, that he, because there's a lot of people who think, oh, he just wants, they're going to want, you know, to turn back around.

01:03:47.260 Yeah, and face the crowd.

01:03:48.640 And face the crowd.

01:03:49.400 And face the shooter, too. 0.99

01:03:50.660 I mean, you don't know what the fuck's going on. 0.99

01:03:52.360 Right. 0.99

01:03:52.780 You're making yourself visual.

01:03:54.760 That was really interesting to me, man.

01:03:58.160 You know what I'm saying?

01:03:58.760 Bold.

01:03:59.740 Right.

01:04:00.780 So bold.

01:04:02.100 And those other guys, well, the other Secret Service are like, please get down because their heads are targets. 1.00

01:04:07.780 Fuck, it's just crazy. 0.99

01:04:08.920 Have you seen about this guy on the internet? 1.00

01:04:10.560 The guy with that hat, that goofy fedora in the background?

01:04:13.260 Oh, yeah.

01:04:14.020 This guy, he's all over the internet.

01:04:16.400 Who is that?

01:04:16.960 I don't even know.

01:04:17.940 But he's, his name's come up a hundred times.

01:04:20.420 The guy who's holding his phone. 1.00

01:04:21.820 And they say, clown, uh, that guy's a fucking. 1.00

01:04:24.840 He's a Simpsons character. 1.00

01:04:26.260 That guy's a clown, dude. 0.96

01:04:28.220 That's Matt Groening. 0.99

01:04:29.240 That's a Matt.

01:04:29.800 Yeah, that's Michael Jackson.

01:04:33.340 That's Michael Jackson.

01:04:35.080 If he never got molested and learned to dance, dude.

01:04:37.860 I feel like, you know what I'm saying?

01:04:41.060 It's insane.

01:04:42.040 Well, here's the crazy part. 0.96

01:04:43.260 You have a white dude.

01:04:44.640 You have Kappa Sig right behind him. 0.94

01:04:46.600 Just smiling.

01:04:47.700 Like, why aren't all those people hiding?

01:04:50.300 That's what I didn't get.

01:04:51.320 No panic.

01:04:52.420 No panic.

01:04:53.360 They were just shooting.

01:04:54.160 No panic.

01:04:55.780 I mean, they show the tape.

01:04:56.760 That guy doesn't even flinch.

01:04:58.460 Fedoraman.

01:04:59.500 Fedoraman.

01:04:59.940 That's his name.

01:05:01.660 Yeah.

01:05:02.500 Fedoraman.

01:05:03.280 He doesn't even go down.

01:05:04.180 But wouldn't you, if somebody starts shooting at somebody.

01:05:06.220 Gone.

01:05:06.880 Gone.

01:05:07.800 I'm crawling on the ground and I'm out of there.

01:05:09.820 Later.

01:05:10.240 Email me.

01:05:11.400 And we'll talk to you later.

01:05:12.700 I'm absolutely out.

01:05:14.140 I'm not hanging out at all.

01:05:16.280 Do you think a marksman could have been accurate enough just to graze him on purpose?

01:05:22.880 That would be too hard.

01:05:24.080 Honestly?

01:05:24.960 Maybe.

01:05:25.960 Those guys are good, dude. 0.99

01:05:27.680 They could shoot an earring off somebody's ear. 0.97

01:05:29.800 Look at him there. 0.92

01:05:30.180 There's Vincent.

01:05:30.700 That's his name.

01:05:31.160 Vincent.

01:05:32.120 Just hanging out.

01:05:34.760 Shooting happens.

01:05:35.480 He still stood up.

01:05:36.420 He didn't even sit down when the first shots rang out.

01:05:39.200 He's just hanging out.

01:05:40.020 Now, I do know it says on the internet he has bad knees, but he just stood up.

01:05:43.380 Just hanging out.

01:05:44.180 But why?

01:05:46.300 Fight, fight, effing praise.

01:05:47.420 No panic.

01:05:48.680 Pretty incredible.

01:05:50.040 I don't know what they want us to believe.

01:05:51.220 That's a good question.

01:05:52.120 Do they want us to think it's a conspiracy?

01:05:54.100 Maybe.

01:05:55.200 Yeah, because then the wheels get spinning more.

01:05:57.160 Yeah.

01:05:57.640 Right?

01:05:58.140 Yeah.

01:05:58.360 For sure, man.

01:06:00.180 You don't think Biden has anything to do with it?

01:06:02.780 I don't.

01:06:03.200 I mean, I wouldn't be surprised if like the FBI or the Department of Justice or one of them,

01:06:07.600 there's something going on there.

01:06:09.440 I wouldn't be surprised if somebody's compromised at Secret Service.

01:06:11.980 But I don't know how you convince a large group of people.

01:06:15.660 You know, like you have to convince the local police as well.

01:06:19.520 It's like.

01:06:20.180 Pretty exhausting.

01:06:20.920 I don't think I could name five police officers in Pennsylvania that would probably not stand

01:06:24.840 up to help for Trump probably.

01:06:26.220 Like a lot of those guys are, you know, military and police.

01:06:29.940 A lot of them are Trump supporters.

01:06:31.080 Unless people are getting bribed.

01:06:33.400 Money.

01:06:34.400 Yeah, but it's just interesting.

01:06:35.680 I don't know how you figure that out.

01:06:37.100 And then.

01:06:37.680 But yeah, how does a 20 year old kid use a ladder?

01:06:41.560 Get up.

01:06:42.040 It just is like there's nobody standing in any of these areas.

01:06:45.060 Yeah.

01:06:45.220 No one's going.

01:06:45.780 What are you doing?

01:06:46.800 Not one guy.

01:06:47.580 Just one walk by guy.

01:06:49.620 What are you doing?

01:06:50.380 Yeah.

01:06:50.700 That guy.

01:06:51.620 He didn't get any.

01:06:52.360 What are you doing? 0.88

01:06:54.140 I mean, this is going to make for it just un fucking believable ladder. 0.80

01:06:58.260 He brought the ladder. 0.91

01:06:59.180 Did he plant it beforehand?

01:07:01.280 Bro.

01:07:01.620 He set it up beforehand.

01:07:02.580 He set it up beforehand.

01:07:03.700 So he went there before, set up the ladder.

01:07:07.940 Dude, that building looks like it's about 12 feet.

01:07:12.120 Right.

01:07:13.900 Huh.

01:07:14.860 I wonder what business is in there.

01:07:16.560 Oh, they didn't secure.

01:07:17.760 It says now.

01:07:19.120 Secret Service did not secure the nearest tall building.

01:07:22.320 A ladder had been placed in advance of the shooting on the building.

01:07:25.100 Attendees alerted law enforcement to the presence of the shooter.

01:07:29.260 A little shaky, dude.

01:07:31.180 Man, I've had, uh, I've had, I've had experience with bad habits.

01:07:36.060 Bad habits.

01:07:38.060 Gosh.

01:07:39.100 I still experience, I, you know, I'm still, I still bad habit from time to time.

01:07:43.240 That's right.

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01:10:32.380 So, um, you golf a lot, man.

01:10:35.700 I golf too much.

01:10:36.640 Do you?

01:10:37.060 It's the only thing I love.

01:10:38.160 If I'm not doing stand-up and work, it's the thing that, like, escapes.

01:10:41.800 I get to escape.

01:10:42.960 I don't have to think about anything.

01:10:44.360 Yeah.

01:10:44.720 Turn off my phone.

01:10:45.800 Don't have to talk to anybody.

01:10:47.500 Just go do it.

01:10:48.900 It's honestly just, it's just a way to hang out with friends and goof and feel like a kid.

01:10:55.240 Remember when we were kids?

01:10:56.500 Yeah.

01:10:57.040 You would just hang out.

01:10:58.700 You didn't need a reason to hang out.

01:11:00.200 You would just hang out.

01:11:00.840 Now, got to have a thing.

01:11:05.220 You could knock on your friend's door, hey, is William home?

01:11:07.720 Yeah.

01:11:08.220 He'll come outside.

01:11:09.260 What's going on?

01:11:10.100 Nothing.

01:11:10.820 You would just sit and hang.

01:11:11.880 You didn't need an end game.

01:11:14.160 There was no, like, purpose.

01:11:17.220 And we don't do, and you get older and then you stop doing that.

01:11:19.440 Yeah.

01:11:19.740 And you're like, come over.

01:11:20.400 And they're like, why?

01:11:21.560 I just want to say hi.

01:11:23.260 No.

01:11:23.820 Nah, dude.

01:11:24.600 See?

01:11:24.820 I got a wife.

01:11:25.600 Yeah, I got a wife, dude. 1.00

01:11:26.360 I can't do it.

01:11:26.740 So then now golf is a, let's go hang out.

01:11:28.920 Yeah.

01:11:29.160 Let's just go putz around and hang out.

01:11:31.280 Yeah.

01:11:32.060 In the sun.

01:11:32.760 Be outside.

01:11:33.400 I mean, which I don't like.

01:11:34.240 That's my biggest.

01:11:36.660 Oh, yeah.

01:11:37.040 Bill Burr's always like, you're going to get cancer?

01:11:40.100 Keep golfing.

01:11:40.840 You're going to get cancer.

01:11:42.080 Keep it up.

01:11:43.260 Keep it up.

01:11:43.820 See what happens.

01:11:44.600 That's what he says all the time.

01:11:45.800 I said, I like it.

01:11:46.820 I enjoy it.

01:11:47.300 I just put on as much as I sunscreen and I'll, you know, whatever.

01:11:50.140 Whatever, man.

01:11:50.780 What am I going to do?

01:11:52.340 Not enjoy it?

01:11:53.580 Yeah.

01:11:53.820 You got to be alive.

01:11:54.720 Yeah.

01:11:55.620 And jelly roll, too.

01:11:57.860 What other impersonation?

01:11:58.740 What's one you do that I really love?

01:12:00.060 The jelly roll.

01:12:00.940 Jelly roll.

01:12:01.520 I just saw, he came to the comedy store with him and MGK and they were, then they went

01:12:06.640 to Saddle Ranch and jelly roll.

01:12:10.120 For people that don't know, Saddle Ranch is a mechanical bull in the center of the bar.

01:12:14.140 He got on it?

01:12:14.820 He set the record.

01:12:15.540 Nuh-uh.

01:12:16.100 Yeah.

01:12:16.300 He set the record for longest bull ride.

01:12:18.140 Longest bull ride with arms in the air.

01:12:20.520 Some people have to hold on.

01:12:21.800 Jelly roll had arms up.

01:12:22.860 You're lying.

01:12:23.440 No.

01:12:23.820 Bring it up.

01:12:25.200 He set the record for longest bull ride at Saddle Ranch on Sunset.

01:12:29.480 Jelly roll did?

01:12:30.420 And it didn't even look hard, to be honest with you.

01:12:32.340 It looked pretty easy.

01:12:33.440 Well, were you looking at the bull?

01:12:36.180 Not much of a difference.

01:12:37.340 I mean, it looked kind of seamless.

01:12:38.780 Now, reports from the bull are.

01:12:40.300 We got to report back from the bull.

01:12:43.780 Just a different story for the bull.

01:12:45.340 MGK, I'm seeing a photograph with a young fan at Ronnie Racky and Jelly Roll's performance

01:12:49.360 at Saddle Ranch.

01:12:50.000 There's no video of Jelly Roll on the bull?

01:12:51.960 There's got to be something.

01:12:52.920 They had to have him on the bull.

01:12:54.400 Unless, you know, he probably requested no videos during that time.

01:12:57.280 It could be it.

01:12:58.500 Maybe it was like a special thing and people weren't allowed to video then.

01:13:01.540 That little kid looks like he's going.

01:13:02.960 That's a little young for a Jelly Roll and MGK show, but.

01:13:06.840 Yeah.

01:13:07.240 I guess, yeah.

01:13:08.040 That is your future ticket, you know, ticket buyer.

01:13:11.460 Interesting, dude.

01:13:11.760 What else is going on, man?

01:13:13.640 You know, honestly, nothing.

01:13:14.900 I'm taking the summer down.

01:13:16.100 I'm going to.

01:13:16.760 Yo, what are you guys going to do?

01:13:17.400 Are you taking a vacation?

01:13:18.040 Yeah, going to Hawaii in a week, two weeks.

01:13:20.400 Ooh, what part?

01:13:21.460 I'm going to.

01:13:23.700 I'm not going to say it out loud now that I think about it.

01:13:25.740 Yeah.

01:13:25.980 But I'm going to a spot that I've never been to before in Hawaii.

01:13:29.480 And we just want to have like a little getaway.

01:13:32.860 But we.

01:13:33.680 I don't go to the.

01:13:34.820 I don't go to like.

01:13:35.540 You and your wife? 0.85

01:13:35.940 Yeah, I don't go to exotic locations just to like go to the beach.

01:13:38.480 So we're doing adventure, doing stuff.

01:13:40.580 I want to go do stuff.

01:13:41.860 We're taking like a.

01:13:44.400 We're taking like a guided hike tour.

01:13:48.340 We're doing a.

01:13:49.000 They give you a.

01:13:49.660 We're going to rent a Jeep and go like tour the island in these little spots they tell you

01:13:53.260 to go to.

01:13:54.040 Yeah.

01:13:54.500 I want to do a spearfishing class.

01:13:58.980 Take me out there and learn how to huck, dude.

01:14:01.600 Dude, that would be sick.

01:14:03.940 I want to do that.

01:14:04.860 I want to spearfish so bad.

01:14:06.380 Dude, we had a show the other night.

01:14:07.680 Amir.

01:14:08.900 K was on the show too.

01:14:11.160 And he fishes.

01:14:13.140 And he.

01:14:14.540 He's good, huh?

01:14:15.500 He's good.

01:14:16.080 He.

01:14:16.440 He brought fresh sashimi to the show.

01:14:19.380 Did he really?

01:14:20.040 Oh, yeah.

01:14:20.260 He goes out and catches it.

01:14:21.180 He's done this before.

01:14:21.920 I've seen this.

01:14:22.500 Yeah.

01:14:22.580 And he just shows up.

01:14:23.480 He had a bottle of soy sauce on him or something.

01:14:25.200 We're just sitting there slurping it, dude.

01:14:26.820 It's good, huh?

01:14:27.420 God, it was so good.

01:14:28.620 Fresh from the.

01:14:29.180 When it's fresh, it's unbelievable.

01:14:30.420 It's the best thing in the world.

01:14:32.480 Catch and eat is so, so good.

01:14:34.400 Yeah.

01:14:34.840 That's one thing.

01:14:35.640 Like, I would love to do that. 1.00

01:14:37.100 I would love to sneak up on an animal and kill it right there and eat it. 1.00

01:14:42.820 Yeah. 0.99

01:14:43.080 My brother made squirrel at 4th of July. 0.99

01:14:47.040 And one girl showed up and ate all the fucking squirrel. 1.00

01:14:50.700 This bitch, kind of, I guess. 1.00

01:14:54.040 I shouldn't say that. 1.00

01:14:55.000 Well, it's pretty self-involved.

01:14:56.260 Well, there's all this squirrel.

01:14:57.780 The squirrel don't have a lot of meat on it.

01:14:59.220 How much meat's on a squirrel?

01:15:00.860 I mean, you got to catch a bunch of them to make anything good.

01:15:03.100 I mean, he had like four or five.

01:15:04.320 My brother's kind of, you know, he's a wildcat.

01:15:06.300 He put on Facebook.

01:15:07.280 He moved into like this rural area and put on Facebook.

01:15:09.140 Anybody having trouble with squirrels hit my line, right?

01:15:12.380 Mm-hmm.

01:15:13.120 And so, yeah, the amount of meat on a squirrel can variable.

01:15:17.380 Three ounces.

01:15:17.960 That's not a lot.

01:15:18.760 Jesus.

01:15:19.040 I wouldn't even let it live, dude.

01:15:22.480 Yeah, leave it alone. 1.00

01:15:23.420 You got to have enough substantial meat for me to kill you. 1.00

01:15:25.320 I can't kill you if you don't have enough meat. 1.00

01:15:26.800 I'm not killing. 1.00

01:15:27.600 Yeah, so.

01:15:28.000 This is why I'm not a fan of shrimp.

01:15:29.960 There's not enough there.

01:15:31.020 Yeah. 0.97

01:15:31.540 I'd rather kill something that has a lot of something to eat. 0.97

01:15:34.000 Yeah. 0.96

01:15:34.740 Like I don't need, like crawfish.

01:15:35.980 I don't need little tiny.

01:15:37.880 A bison, a buck.

01:15:39.240 I want something.

01:15:39.860 Russian.

01:15:40.380 Thick.

01:15:40.940 Yeah.

01:15:41.500 Yeah, thick.

01:15:42.740 Yeah.

01:15:43.040 Something that's worthwhile.

01:15:44.120 Yeah.

01:15:44.880 100% dude.

01:15:47.100 What else happened?

01:15:48.260 But life is good this summer.

01:15:50.820 I'm going to take it off and just relax.

01:15:52.340 Yeah, how long is the trip going to be?

01:15:53.800 And what else are you going to do?

01:15:54.700 A week and some change.

01:15:55.840 And then I'm going to come back and I'm going to go to Chicago to see family.

01:16:00.060 Mm-hmm.

01:16:00.440 I'm going to do a couple of charity events, which I'm trying to get into more.

01:16:05.480 Yeah.

01:16:05.840 I like that, man.

01:16:06.500 I think I want to do more and more and more for, like, all the stuff that I really like

01:16:12.420 is, like, involving children's charities for kids with cancer or debilitating injuries

01:16:18.500 or, you know, I don't know.

01:16:21.420 Like, I want to support adults that are sick, but kids that are sick, to me, gets my heart

01:16:25.000 first.

01:16:26.460 Yeah.

01:16:26.600 If adults are sick, it's kind of their fault a lot of times.

01:16:28.700 You did it.

01:16:29.240 Yeah.

01:16:29.460 Yeah.

01:16:29.960 Yeah.

01:16:30.180 And you've also had enough.

01:16:31.360 Right.

01:16:31.800 You've eaten enough.

01:16:32.540 You've had enough.

01:16:33.160 All right.

01:16:33.360 Let somebody else have some.

01:16:34.640 Yeah.

01:16:35.000 I think, yeah, catching up with kids is really important.

01:16:37.700 Yeah.

01:16:37.840 And it's like, we've been so fortunate just to even have some of, like, to be able to have

01:16:41.260 some of the fun and opportunities and neat things.

01:16:43.340 You know, I started thinking about that, too.

01:16:44.460 It's like, I got to create more of a way to do something more positive, you know?

01:16:47.840 For young people, because it's, they, you know, if you can help the next generation

01:16:51.920 of whatever it is, that's like what you do in comedy, bringing people out and introducing

01:16:56.020 new comics to the world, that's an important thing.

01:16:58.460 So, in the other side of it, I want to try to, you know, like St. Jude's and all that

01:17:01.960 stuff, Children's Hospital, and, like, I think those are important.

01:17:04.680 So, I'm going to do that, and then, then I'm going, I get to throw out the first pitch

01:17:09.960 at Wrigley.

01:17:10.580 No.

01:17:11.340 Yeah.

01:17:11.720 And sing the seventh inning stretch.

01:17:13.240 No, let's go, dude.

01:17:13.720 Yeah, thank you, dog.

01:17:14.540 I'm excited.

01:17:15.680 September.

01:17:16.520 Wow.

01:17:16.880 Uh, 9-6, September 6th, I do it.

01:17:20.200 And I sent the email from the Cubs, the Cubs reached out, and I sent the email to my dad,

01:17:25.660 and my dad wrote back, you finally made it.

01:17:27.860 You finally made it.

01:17:28.840 Of all the things I've achieved, this is the only thing, he was like, good, you finally

01:17:31.760 did it.

01:17:32.360 Yeah.

01:17:32.920 Yeah.

01:17:33.500 Sean Dunstan would be proud, he wrote.

01:17:35.220 Oh, yeah, baby.

01:17:36.620 Yes, he would.

01:17:37.540 He said Andre Dawson.

01:17:38.680 Yeah, Andre.

01:17:39.300 He said, now Andre Dawson can rest.

01:17:40.960 Yeah.

01:17:41.880 Finally.

01:17:42.380 Yeah.

01:17:43.200 Puts it down.

01:17:44.280 Wow, dude.

01:17:44.940 No, that's amazing.

01:17:45.740 I grew up watching the Cubs, man.

01:17:47.280 My grandfather played, like, triple-A ball in Chicago or Iowa, whenever their farm team

01:17:52.880 used to be over there.

01:17:53.540 He played for one of their farm teams a long time ago.

01:17:55.420 And so we would sit all the time and watch the Cubs, you know, because the WGNO, you

01:18:00.540 know?

01:18:01.000 Yeah, the WGN.

01:18:02.000 Mark Grace, Sean Dunstan, Rick Sutcliffe.

01:18:03.440 Ryan Sandberg.

01:18:04.380 Oh, dude.

01:18:05.280 When I was a kid, I thought his name was Ryan, by the way.

01:18:07.100 His name's Ryan.

01:18:08.360 No.

01:18:08.880 Yeah, all these years, I thought when I was a child, I thought his name was Ryan Sandberg.

01:18:12.760 No, his name's Ryan.

01:18:13.780 Look it up.

01:18:14.180 It's Ryan.

01:18:15.720 Your name's Ryan?

01:18:16.980 Ryan, yeah.

01:18:17.800 Like an orange outside?

01:18:19.540 R-Y-N-E. 1.00

01:18:20.960 Ryan.

01:18:21.880 I thought it was Ryan all these years.

01:18:23.440 Dude, I traded 70 of his cards as Ryan Sandberg.

01:18:28.560 Yeah.

01:18:29.520 How did he misspell his own name, dude?

01:18:31.840 I know.

01:18:32.200 Poor guy.

01:18:32.980 Poor guy.

01:18:34.340 Ryan Sandberg.

01:18:34.940 Yeah.

01:18:35.260 Sandberg.

01:18:35.660 Mark Grace.

01:18:36.780 Legends.

01:18:38.000 Yeah, dude.

01:18:38.520 I got to meet Mark Grace one time, dude.

01:18:40.320 I was sitting in a bar.

01:18:42.160 He was sitting in a bar and my buddy told me he was there, so I went up and pulled up

01:18:45.000 and he had some great stories, dude.

01:18:48.000 Those guys are just, that baseball was just a, you know, a different game, man.

01:18:52.360 I mean, every sport is, but something about baseball, because they used to, you know, Harry

01:18:56.140 Carey, our notorious announcer that Will Ferrell did that people know, you know, he was

01:18:59.960 a blackout.

01:19:00.700 I mean, he was drunk 90% of the time.

01:19:03.120 Yeah.

01:19:04.000 And still held it together enough to get to the, you know, get to the stadium on time,

01:19:10.340 drink about 13 old styles.

01:19:12.220 Yeah.

01:19:13.380 And just make it through.

01:19:14.480 You can't do that anymore.

01:19:15.440 Look at that guy.

01:19:16.220 He's 26 right there.

01:19:17.460 Yeah.

01:19:17.740 He hit on my mom one time.

01:19:23.520 Nuh-uh.

01:19:24.100 Yeah.

01:19:24.280 One time he hit on my mom.

01:19:25.380 Really?

01:19:25.680 That was great.

01:19:26.260 Yeah.

01:19:26.480 It could have been Harry Carey's son.

01:19:27.640 She blew it. 0.99

01:19:28.700 She dropped the bag. 1.00

01:19:30.220 Fuck, dude. 1.00

01:19:30.700 Yeah. 1.00

01:19:30.960 He hit, he flirty with it.

01:19:32.060 He goes, hey, hey, pretty lady.

01:19:34.780 Yeah.

01:19:35.460 Look at it.

01:19:36.580 Hey, hey, pretty lady. 1.00

01:19:38.540 The best one was, look at these ladies. 1.00

01:19:43.520 That's a triple.

01:19:45.200 Yeah, right.

01:19:45.800 Look at the cans on that one.

01:19:47.880 Look at the stems on this, bro.

01:19:50.300 Double time.

01:19:52.300 Yeah, he hit on my mom.

01:19:53.880 Wow.

01:19:54.020 So yeah, I get to go throw the first pitch in September.

01:19:55.860 That'll be a big deal for me.

01:19:57.280 And then go see the Bears.

01:19:58.000 So cool, dude.

01:19:58.760 Home opener.

01:19:59.960 Are you, are you going to, do you ever go to Titans games in Tennessee?

01:20:03.000 Sometimes I do.

01:20:04.020 What I like about Titans is it's very casual there.

01:20:06.340 It's like nice fans, good, not crazy.

01:20:09.580 It's not like you're Philadelphia. 0.71

01:20:10.520 No lunatics. 0.99

01:20:11.340 No, no real lunatics. 0.95

01:20:12.840 Right.

01:20:13.280 It's like just safe.

01:20:14.240 Yeah, play that up right there.

01:20:15.300 Harry Carey.

01:20:15.700 This is great.

01:20:17.400 Harry back at Wrigley Field.

01:20:21.600 She wasn't in the right field bleacher yesterday, Arnie.

01:20:28.440 Well, some of the lovely sights you see.

01:20:32.620 Yeah.

01:20:34.320 Arnie, you trying to get me barred off.

01:20:38.940 That began to look like a striptease for a while.

01:20:42.300 I mean, that was the thing about Wrigley.

01:20:43.560 They used to wear, people would wear like G-string bikinis into the, in the outfield. 0.95

01:20:49.140 That's, that's America.

01:20:50.420 Yeah. 1.00

01:20:50.580 They got to bring some of that shit back. 0.99

01:20:52.260 Well, that when they talk about make America great again, that's what we're talking about. 1.00

01:20:55.840 Yeah.

01:20:56.200 G-strings in the, in the, in the, in the outfield.

01:20:59.020 That's a word.

01:20:59.540 We're not talking about anything else.

01:21:01.000 We're just talking about that.

01:21:02.220 Yeah.

01:21:02.380 Just let things be, man.

01:21:03.520 Let things be fun.

01:21:04.360 Everything now has a rule or it's fucked up or something, dude. 0.97

01:21:07.540 Everything has a rule.

01:21:08.600 That's a really good call.

01:21:09.840 Everything has a rule now.

01:21:11.440 It's like.

01:21:12.140 Can't do that.

01:21:13.140 Yeah.

01:21:13.460 Can't do that.

01:21:14.000 Oh, you can't do it like that.

01:21:14.920 You got to do it like this.

01:21:15.720 You got to do this.

01:21:16.840 But I don't know if that's because we ruined, just humans ruined it.

01:21:20.100 Yeah, we did. 0.86

01:21:20.720 Humans ruined it all. 0.95

01:21:21.740 That's all our fault. 1.00

01:21:23.120 We fucked it up. 0.94

01:21:24.300 We, instead of letting things be and just in trying to enjoy things, we fucked it up. 0.98

01:21:29.900 We just want, we're greedy, we're selfish, we're self-involved. 0.86

01:21:34.160 We don't care about each other.

01:21:35.740 Because if we really cared about each other, we wouldn't, we wouldn't go out of our way

01:21:41.000 to try to hurt people or bring people down.

01:21:46.120 We don't care.

01:21:47.300 It's a bad thing.

01:21:48.860 Well, and if some people, if once there's some bad apples, other apples start to be like,

01:21:53.420 I need, I think there can be a tendency.

01:21:55.940 Bad rubs off.

01:21:56.940 Yeah.

01:21:57.160 It kind of rubs off.

01:21:57.800 Or you have to also get bad now to be able to take care of yourself, you know?

01:22:02.140 To be a level.

01:22:02.400 It's like you got to bring yourself to a different level.

01:22:05.940 You're a good apple.

01:22:07.380 Thanks, man.

01:22:07.920 You are too.

01:22:08.280 You've always been a good apple.

01:22:09.600 You are too, dude.

01:22:10.200 And you know what?

01:22:11.740 I think the older we get in life and career, the more I start to really see through the 0.97

01:22:18.040 smoke of all the bullshit and start to care about what I really care about. 0.52

01:22:23.560 Like things that, I guess you really learn what really matters. 0.99

01:22:26.980 It's stuff that your parents would say or older people would say to you, and all those

01:22:30.840 cliches are true.

01:22:32.000 It really is true that you just, you slow down, you step back, you start to kind of see things

01:22:36.760 for what they really are, and you start to just cherish things that matter. 0.84

01:22:40.920 You don't give a shit about the other stuff anymore. 0.95

01:22:42.960 Yeah. 0.98

01:22:43.180 I don't care about small stuff as much as I used to.

01:22:45.500 It just doesn't matter.

01:22:46.820 You just got to enjoy it.

01:22:47.800 But yeah, I think some of that, it is wild if you're able to get some age, that you're

01:22:53.680 able to get some perspective.

01:22:56.260 It is nice.

01:22:57.000 But that was, what is that, Bobby Lee with Richard Simmons?

01:22:58.840 Rest in peace.

01:22:59.300 Yeah, Richard Simmons just passed away, man.

01:23:00.880 And some on the internet are saying this is Bobby's fault.

01:23:04.040 I wouldn't be surprised.

01:23:05.280 God, Bobby was...

01:23:07.140 Well, he was a Japanese girl at one point, and then he...

01:23:10.340 Zoom in on that.

01:23:11.140 No wonder Richard's on him like that.

01:23:12.860 Right.

01:23:13.560 Really cute.

01:23:16.000 God.

01:23:17.400 Really cute.

01:23:19.420 Richard, wow.

01:23:20.820 That looks AI for some...

01:23:22.260 See, that also looks fake.

01:23:24.220 Oh, wow.

01:23:25.840 It's just crazy to see, like...

01:23:28.640 I bet Richard teased him or just touched his neck.

01:23:32.280 Well, I think it's vice versa.

01:23:33.280 I think they both...

01:23:33.860 Bobby is a big tease. 0.99

01:23:36.040 Bobby, well, he said he let some guy eat his butt or whatever one time. 0.99

01:23:42.040 One time. 0.99

01:23:42.580 He's been involved in some crazy stuff, huh?

01:23:44.100 Yeah, I think a few times.

01:23:45.960 Yeah, that's what's crazy.

01:23:47.000 I think I would not want some guy to do that to me.

01:23:50.600 No, not for me.

01:23:52.240 Look, it's hard to be a business partner and one of my best friends with someone that I

01:23:57.340 respect so little.

01:23:59.420 It's tough.

01:24:00.040 I love him to death.

01:24:04.320 He's my perfect...

01:24:06.040 He's my comedy compliment.

01:24:08.040 I've never met somebody more that I feel the most in tune with comedically.

01:24:13.360 Really?

01:24:14.000 Just because he's... 0.99

01:24:16.120 It just feels like our brains connect on just a dumb, perfect level. 0.99

01:24:23.700 And I understand him. 0.98

01:24:24.880 And he gets me.

01:24:26.060 And he knows what gets me mad.

01:24:27.360 And I know what gets him mad.

01:24:28.520 It's something about it so fun.

01:24:30.400 Yeah.

01:24:30.620 I feel like a kid when I'm with him.

01:24:32.180 Whenever we get together, it's the most fun.

01:24:34.380 I've said this a hundred times.

01:24:35.900 It's the best thing that's ever happened in my career. 0.86

01:24:37.920 Of all the shit I've done, of all the things that I could be like, that was cool. 0.71

01:24:41.700 I'm proud of that. 0.98

01:24:42.980 This is by far the most fun I've ever had in my life.

01:24:46.160 It is a blessing from the universe.

01:24:49.160 And thank God me and that little dumpling are together.

01:24:53.300 Because it's the most fun I've ever had.

01:24:55.480 I've never had that much fun in anything in my career.

01:24:59.400 No crushing on stage.

01:25:01.640 No TV show accolade.

01:25:03.320 Really?

01:25:03.920 Nothing.

01:25:04.480 Wow.

01:25:05.180 It feels so...

01:25:06.040 Because it's so free.

01:25:07.220 Oh, you guys have a blast, man.

01:25:08.840 I mean, you guys have created a top 20 podcast together.

01:25:12.060 I mean, it's unbelievable.

01:25:13.440 Yeah.

01:25:13.700 You know, it's a...

01:25:14.440 It's what you've gotten to do.

01:25:15.940 You know, isn't this rewarding?

01:25:17.900 This is like how fun.

01:25:19.060 I get to have fun.

01:25:19.960 But you've also gotten to do so much acting.

01:25:23.600 Does it compare?

01:25:24.740 Do you feel...

01:25:25.140 Yeah, like, now that you've had a good taste of both, does one really compare?

01:25:28.500 Are they two totally different things?

01:25:29.720 Obviously, they're different.

01:25:30.740 Such different animals.

01:25:31.820 But I mean, they're both rewarding and they're...

01:25:33.520 I mean, like, the acting is rewarding in its own little way.

01:25:36.340 I like the acting stuff if I get to work with people that I'm impressed by.

01:25:39.620 That's what it...

01:25:40.160 You know what I'm saying?

01:25:40.600 To me, it's like, if I do something with someone that I'm intrigued by or impressed,

01:25:45.940 impressed by their skills and ability, it's cool to see people do cool work.

01:25:50.040 It's just a cool thing to watch.

01:25:51.260 Oh, yeah.

01:25:52.060 You know?

01:25:52.540 Like, when you see a pro...

01:25:54.640 Like, you know who the most pro dude on earth...

01:25:56.260 I think John Cena might be the most pro dude on earth.

01:25:59.240 Yeah, he was on Whiskey Ginger, yeah?

01:26:00.620 He's the man.

01:26:01.260 Yeah, he's responsible.

01:26:02.700 He's smart.

01:26:03.540 He's sweet.

01:26:04.160 He's caring.

01:26:05.260 He's hardworking.

01:26:06.780 He's such a fun, nice, like, wonderful dude.

01:26:10.240 He's a pro.

01:26:11.340 He is a pro.

01:26:12.400 I don't even know how to, like, articulate it the right way, but incredible, gracious,

01:26:17.880 sweet.

01:26:18.800 It never steps on toes.

01:26:20.300 Never is disrespectful to anybody.

01:26:22.380 Never has an ego about anything.

01:26:24.920 It's wild.

01:26:25.880 He is a lesson in life.

01:26:27.140 I've tried to...

01:26:27.800 I watch him when we were working together.

01:26:29.860 I was like, this dude is...

01:26:31.260 He's a G.

01:26:32.320 We're comics. 0.98

01:26:33.080 I think what we have to remember sometimes is we're comics, so something is fucked up 0.96

01:26:37.540 about us. 0.86

01:26:37.980 We were in that returns basket, remember?

01:26:40.080 100%, dude.

01:26:40.560 We went right back.

01:26:41.380 You know what I'm talking about?

01:26:41.960 Yeah.

01:26:42.040 When you see, like, the sale basket or whatever, or the, like, 40-cent candles or whatever, 0.97

01:26:46.380 and you're like, this bitch ain't gonna burn, you know? 1.00

01:26:48.460 Yeah, yeah. 1.00

01:26:49.400 It's like...

01:26:50.080 We are.

01:26:50.700 So a lot of times I feel like I'll compare myself to other...

01:26:54.000 Or in some ways, I'm like, God.

01:26:55.780 But then I gotta remember, I...

01:26:57.320 Something was wrong with me.

01:26:59.060 But you're special...

01:26:59.580 It's in a good way.

01:27:00.620 You're special.

01:27:00.800 Right, in a good way.

01:27:01.480 Because we're able to maneuver it enough.

01:27:04.020 Right, and make it worth something.

01:27:05.260 Right.

01:27:05.480 We're the...

01:27:05.860 You know, we are the...

01:27:07.260 We're the shopping cart with the wobbly wheel, the one that nobody wants.

01:27:10.640 Yeah.

01:27:10.940 Yeah, that's...

01:27:11.440 We're that.

01:27:12.140 We're wobbly wheel.

01:27:13.400 And you know what?

01:27:14.820 When you do take it, you do realize it's kind of fun.

01:27:18.100 Yeah.

01:27:18.260 It's funny.

01:27:18.640 It goes off on its own.

01:27:19.860 It'll hit the wall a few times.

01:27:21.900 But it's fun.

01:27:22.880 It's kind of fun. 1.00

01:27:24.160 Oh, it'll veer right into a fucking cute mom's butt, dude. 1.00

01:27:26.200 Yeah. 1.00

01:27:26.840 It might help you out.

01:27:28.120 Yeah.

01:27:28.520 We're the wobbly wheel.

01:27:29.420 And you know what?

01:27:30.100 That's...

01:27:30.300 But that's...

01:27:30.840 You're right.

01:27:31.260 We are different.

01:27:31.900 We're a different species.

01:27:33.200 And we feel that sometimes we feel threatened because people don't get us or we're weird 0.98

01:27:38.220 or we try weird shit. 0.88

01:27:40.220 You know, you try a joker a bit and it doesn't work and people are like, what? 0.99

01:27:46.460 But that's the beauty of it.

01:27:49.140 If you didn't have that, everything would be real formatted and real simple.

01:27:52.180 So they...

01:27:53.360 Those other people from the other side of it, they love to see us try because they don't

01:27:57.660 do that.

01:27:58.080 So that's...

01:27:58.620 You know what I mean?

01:27:59.240 Like, I've had a bunch of people, actors say to me, I said, oh man, I don't know how

01:28:03.000 you want to improv those lines.

01:28:04.280 Like, why?

01:28:04.760 Why do you want to try and do that?

01:28:06.220 I said, well, because that's the adventure.

01:28:07.620 The risk is amazing.

01:28:09.540 If you get something out that's worth it and good, it's like, it's just telling a new

01:28:13.620 joke that works.

01:28:14.680 You know when you write a new joke and it works?

01:28:16.420 Oh.

01:28:16.880 Oh, the first time you're like, woohoo!

01:28:18.960 It feels incredible.

01:28:20.060 It's the same thing as when you land a good line.

01:28:21.560 Yeah.

01:28:21.740 It's the same feeling.

01:28:23.280 Oh, I love that.

01:28:23.860 The other day, somebody said enigma.

01:28:25.900 And I was like, careful.

01:28:27.860 Careful.

01:28:29.040 Just don't say enigma.

01:28:33.200 You know what I'm saying?

01:28:34.120 Yeah.

01:28:34.720 You can't hard R enigma. 1.00

01:28:36.040 I can let you get, like, you know, I don't want you to upset the fucking neighbors, you 0.99

01:28:41.080 know? 0.99

01:28:42.580 They'll accept enigma.

01:28:44.180 If you're going to say that, say that inside.

01:28:45.800 You have to enigma inside.

01:28:47.020 Keep those enigmas inside. 1.00

01:28:49.540 What's life like?

01:28:50.640 You don't have a family yet.

01:28:51.780 No family.

01:28:52.360 No kids.

01:28:52.780 I don't think I'm going to.

01:28:54.200 Really?

01:28:54.580 Yeah, I don't think so.

01:28:55.380 You'd be such a fun dad, man.

01:28:56.780 I would.

01:28:57.080 But you know what I'd like?

01:28:57.720 At this age in my life, I think is now, you know, 40.

01:29:02.180 Once the 40 number is real, I think I'd be willing to adopt and try to give someone 0.91

01:29:08.900 a good life, you know?

01:29:10.640 Yeah, I think because at this age, it'd be hard to start with a baby as older as because

01:29:14.700 I feel older and it'd be tough.

01:29:17.640 And so I think that.

01:29:18.940 Really?

01:29:19.680 Yeah.

01:29:21.020 Well, dude, I'll be 80 when they're 40.

01:29:23.320 Yeah, but that's their problem.

01:29:26.180 Yeah, but I'd rather adopt a kid, put him into a phenomenal situation.

01:29:29.780 I feel like at this stage in my life, it would be cool to give someone a better life

01:29:34.760 who had a tough life because a lot of kids have these, you know, man, you see a lot of

01:29:39.960 this stuff and you see how hard certain young people have it and there's, you know, there's

01:29:46.940 no hope and I've been blessed in life.

01:29:49.740 I'm so lucky.

01:29:50.660 So it's like, why not give someone else a good opportunity?

01:29:53.480 I don't know.

01:29:54.080 Yeah, it'd be cool if they had a contest too to be your kid.

01:29:56.420 Yeah, well, that's how I would organize it.

01:29:58.440 But they'd have to show off somehow.

01:29:59.980 I'd want to see their skills and abilities and talents.

01:30:01.740 I would rank them.

01:30:02.360 I have a set system at home that I've written out.

01:30:04.520 How high can you jump?

01:30:05.380 You know, I basically put them through a combine.

01:30:06.960 You know what I mean?

01:30:07.460 I make my kids run the 40.

01:30:09.100 Oh, yeah.

01:30:09.640 That great joke about people coming over the border that they should have to go through 1.00

01:30:14.780 a-

01:30:14.940 American Ninja Warrior course.

01:30:16.460 Yeah.

01:30:17.500 You want to get into the country, man. 1.00

01:30:19.080 I want them in here.

01:30:19.940 I just, I want to see them work for it a little bit.

01:30:21.500 That's what I'm saying, bro. 0.98

01:30:21.860 You got to fucking, we want the best. 0.98

01:30:23.400 Yeah, we can't just have anybody, but that should be the standard. 0.99

01:30:28.280 Oh, I think so.

01:30:29.360 And then also, you can have rich people bet on it, like in the distance.

01:30:32.580 And use that money.

01:30:33.300 And use that money.

01:30:33.980 Yeah, that's exactly right.

01:30:34.680 Well, look, when Europeans came over for Ellis Island, you had to be able to do 10 push-ups, 0.99

01:30:40.820 otherwise they wouldn't let you in.

01:30:41.780 They'd turn you back around.

01:30:42.680 10 push-ups, so you had to get back on the boat and go back.

01:30:45.400 So that's a standard.

01:30:46.400 We need to set some kind of standard. 0.99

01:30:47.440 Oh, yeah, now you can show up with asthma and we'll fucking- 1.00

01:30:50.440 We'll give you an inhaler. 1.00

01:30:52.260 Yeah, we'll give you a fucking free wheelchair. 0.97

01:30:56.440 Thanks so much for coming, dude. 0.98

01:30:57.620 And the new tour, what's it going to be called?

01:30:59.380 The Freeze Peach Tour.

01:31:01.380 Freeze Peach Tour.

01:31:03.640 If you say it, you'll know it.

01:31:04.980 The Freeze Peach.

01:31:06.060 There it is.

01:31:07.180 The Freeze Peach Tour.

01:31:08.260 I love that, dude.

01:31:09.220 The Freeze Peach.

01:31:10.020 The Freeze Peach Tour, yeah.

01:31:11.320 One of my, one of my, was, oh, Rise Up Lights, you know?

01:31:16.440 Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

01:31:17.180 Rise Up Lights.

01:31:17.960 Yeah, I love that.

01:31:19.760 I'm so jealous y'all are going to Australia.

01:31:22.360 Dude, I have, I love it down there.

01:31:25.940 Me too.

01:31:26.540 Because I shot that movie with Sina and them in Melbourne and it was just-

01:31:31.480 Did it come out?

01:31:32.180 I loved it.

01:31:33.000 Huh?

01:31:33.360 Did the movie come out?

01:31:34.160 Yeah, yeah, it's on Amazon Prime, Ricky Stenicki on Amazon Prime.

01:31:38.040 Oh, you're on Ricky Stenicki.

01:31:39.240 Oh, wait, I don't know if I saw that or not.

01:31:40.560 Yeah, me and Sina and Efron and Jermaine Fowler and then-

01:31:44.980 I feel horrible I didn't even see this.

01:31:46.240 No, it's all good, brother.

01:31:47.180 Come on, man.

01:31:48.220 It's, it's, it's fun, man.

01:31:49.460 It's a fun movie.

01:31:50.360 Farrelly did it.

01:31:51.320 Pete Farrelly, the guy that did Dumb and Dumber with his brother.

01:31:53.160 Um, and William H. Macy in the background holding it down.

01:31:56.420 Who was phenomenal?

01:31:57.300 William H. Macy, dude.

01:31:58.060 He's unbelievable.

01:31:58.820 You ever seen the door-to-door salesman movie where he's selling soaps?

01:32:02.880 No.

01:32:03.180 What movie is that?

01:32:04.860 He's incredible.

01:32:05.580 Dude, he is.

01:32:06.340 Put up door-to-door soap salesman.

01:32:08.120 See what you get there.

01:32:09.560 He's so good, man.

01:32:10.580 He was such a-

01:32:13.040 The story of Bill Porter.

01:32:14.400 Bill Porter.

01:32:15.800 He, he's such a cool, smooth, slick dude.

01:32:19.820 And he, uh, he lives out, he lives out in the mountains.

01:32:23.880 Does he?

01:32:24.340 Yeah.

01:32:24.500 In California?

01:32:25.040 No, not in California, no.

01:32:26.320 He lives out in the mountains.

01:32:27.440 Wow.

01:32:28.120 Door-to-door, there he is.

01:32:30.500 And he's, and he's a, and he's a soap salesman.

01:32:32.740 Oh, there we go.

01:32:33.300 Bill Porter, a man of remarkable spirit.

01:32:36.360 Let that jargill change your life.

01:32:37.720 Yeah, he was mentally challenged or whatever, and they let him sell a little bit of soap.

01:32:41.620 Dude, I used to work as an assistant.

01:32:42.880 This dude sold Italian food or semi-Italian or whatever, door-to-door.

01:32:47.520 And so, I think he was trying to date my mom or something.

01:32:50.320 So, he gave me a job, like, just, like, cruising, going along with him and stuff, dude.

01:32:53.680 That's kind of nice.

01:32:55.140 That's pretty cool.

01:32:55.840 Except I remember all, he had to take, like, a cold cart with him, and all the stuff was so cold.

01:33:00.820 Because he had to sell it refrigerated.

01:33:02.680 Yeah. 0.97

01:33:03.020 So, I remember I'd fucking, he'd, like, he'd be like, oh, get the clams or whatever, and I was like, oh, I'd fuck it up, you know? 0.98

01:33:09.160 Like, I fucking, I was like, I don't want to be in the workforce. 0.99

01:33:12.180 I want to be handicapped. 0.99

01:33:14.000 You just want some, but you want someone to date your mom who's not, who's not cumbersome in their, in their job.

01:33:21.100 Yeah.

01:33:21.280 That's the cumbersome, cumbersome job.

01:33:23.700 Yeah.

01:33:23.940 The guy you want to date your mom, you want a guy in, like, you know, not, regular sales, not door-to-door sales.

01:33:32.640 You want him to, like, call on, on customers.

01:33:35.440 Yeah.

01:33:35.840 Phone.

01:33:36.760 Yeah, yeah, we didn't.

01:33:37.620 Desk job, dad.

01:33:38.740 A desk job.

01:33:39.300 That's what I had.

01:33:39.800 My mom remarried, and my stepdad is, was a, you know, sales guy, but he, you know.

01:33:45.680 Phone.

01:33:46.240 Desk job.

01:33:46.900 Right.

01:33:47.140 You know, go to an office, say, hey, Karen, coffee, water cooler, lunch, lunch at, you know, lunch at, uh, Bucca de Beppo.

01:33:57.600 Bucca de Beppo, yeah, Bucca de Beppo, yeah, get the whole crew out there.

01:34:01.360 You know, my dad likes, we buy my dad, um, his only gift every year, birthday, Christmas, same gift every time.

01:34:08.740 I get him a gift card to the Olive Garden.

01:34:11.000 Oh, yeah.

01:34:11.380 That's what I get him every time.

01:34:12.160 That's his favorite, favorite thing.

01:34:13.640 It's all he wants.

01:34:14.140 He goes and he sits there and he has the Zupa Toscana and the breadsticks.

01:34:18.580 And he'll eat and eat and eat and eat until they tell him, sir, you know, let's not overstay our welcome.

01:34:30.060 Like your family, but.

01:34:31.640 But extended, you know, take a walk.

01:34:35.360 That's all I do.

01:34:36.120 We buy him the Olive Garden. 1.00

01:34:36.560 If you've ever shut down an Olive Garden, you've got a fucking problem. 1.00

01:34:40.200 That's all I'm going to say. 1.00

01:34:41.220 Dude, my, uh, my dad used to, he would take, he would go drink sometimes at this place called Tony Pedoni's.

01:34:50.060 That was the name of the place.

01:34:50.980 I love the name of that.

01:34:52.040 Tony Pedoni's.

01:34:52.860 Tony Pedoni's.

01:34:54.060 And so we go over there and, uh, and the lady, he'd be like, oh, run up and down the bar real quick. 1.00

01:34:59.720 And the lady will give you a candy right there. 1.00

01:35:01.920 I remember that.

01:35:03.000 She just wanted to see you sprint. 1.00

01:35:05.340 Yeah. 0.99

01:35:05.580 I'd fucking, but on the bar, yeah, I'd fucking sprint down there and sprint right back. 0.99

01:35:09.180 And they'd give me a little chocolate. 0.98

01:35:10.320 Yeah, well, I was going to say, which one was it?

01:35:11.840 Was it a good candy or one of those like that?

01:35:13.340 It was a Hershey Kiss, usually.

01:35:14.600 I love me a Hershey Kiss.

01:35:15.640 They were good.

01:35:16.540 They're just a, there's not, they're, look, you know what Hershey Kiss? 0.98

01:35:19.060 It's not trying to do shit. 0.93

01:35:20.380 Yeah. 0.95

01:35:20.760 You know what we are.

01:35:21.720 Here I am.

01:35:22.380 You know what we are.

01:35:22.920 We're Christian chocolates.

01:35:24.020 Yeah.

01:35:24.720 God loves us and we love them.

01:35:25.980 Yeah, we're not getting fucking weird.

01:35:27.700 Yeah, we're not. 1.00

01:35:28.360 Not filling my fucking butt with caramel like somebody's fucking quiz. 1.00

01:35:33.620 Yeah, dude. 1.00

01:35:34.300 How are you doing?

01:35:35.160 This is Tony Pedoni's.

01:35:36.520 We give original American God-given chocolate.

01:35:38.800 Hershey Kiss, in and out.

01:35:40.680 Dude, I wanted to do this thing called the chocolate shoulder challenge.

01:35:43.540 So you take a Hershey Kiss, right?

01:35:45.080 You put one on each shoulder, okay?

01:35:48.400 And then you try to eat it all.

01:35:51.860 Oh my God.

01:35:53.280 How?

01:35:54.020 It is.

01:35:55.040 But without making this one fall.

01:35:56.920 Is that what it is?

01:35:57.480 Right.

01:35:57.740 Yeah, right.

01:35:58.280 That's so hard.

01:35:58.900 You can't make one fall.

01:35:59.520 It is fall.

01:36:00.600 It's unbelievable.

01:36:01.500 I don't have that kind of neck mobility.

01:36:03.100 That's not a problem.

01:36:03.140 No one does.

01:36:03.980 Yeah.

01:36:04.500 But every now and then somebody will do it like a-

01:36:07.040 Well, it's got to be somebody with a nice long neck.

01:36:08.740 Who's got a long neck in the comedy game?

01:36:11.420 It's got to be someone we know who's-

01:36:12.800 Kirk Fox, maybe?

01:36:13.700 He's necky.

01:36:14.500 He's extremely necky. 0.68

01:36:15.720 He's necky.

01:36:16.160 He's got that tennis body, tennis neck.

01:36:18.000 Lanky, necky.

01:36:19.080 Yeah.

01:36:19.480 Looking over the net.

01:36:20.680 Love, love.

01:36:21.540 Mm-hmm.

01:36:22.340 All love.

01:36:22.900 There he is.

01:36:23.560 Kirk's so funny, dude.

01:36:24.840 He was in my favorite movie, The Patriot.

01:36:27.140 One of the funniest comedians, I think, working.

01:36:31.040 Also, one of the funniest just people to be around.

01:36:33.360 Like, right when he walks up, you kind of-

01:36:35.580 There's just something about his energy.

01:36:37.400 The joke is already kind of set up.

01:36:38.980 Yeah, do the picture to the left of that or to the right of that one that you have on right now.

01:36:41.940 I mean, that's as necky as it gets.

01:36:43.140 Yes.

01:36:43.660 That guy could kill the Hershey Challenge. 1.00

01:36:45.500 Oh, he's a fucking necrophiliac, dude. 1.00

01:36:47.820 But if he dies, yeah, people are going to order. 1.00

01:36:52.060 They're going to get three and a half ounces out of his neck. 0.98

01:36:54.920 A big time.

01:36:55.580 Well, you know, his casket is already designed.

01:36:58.240 He said he pre-bought it to one of those.

01:37:00.080 You know those, you know, like a magician when he cuts those saws in a woman in half

01:37:03.360 and her head is outside of the casket, but the whole body's inside?

01:37:05.920 Mm-hmm.

01:37:06.160 He has that exact same one.

01:37:07.840 Oh, wow.

01:37:08.480 Yeah, because his neck is long enough that they couldn't-

01:37:10.700 They said he'd have to break his neck to smush it in there so his head'll be out.

01:37:14.240 It's tough.

01:37:15.020 Well, it's a crazy thing.

01:37:15.700 When they bury you, some people, they have to break.

01:37:17.440 They're like, to save money, they're like, we can break your arms and legs

01:37:21.380 and move them closer to your body so you have a little less square footage. 1.00

01:37:24.700 And I'm like, just fucking throw me in a dump truck. 1.00

01:37:28.000 Don't fucking- 1.00

01:37:28.620 Don't sit there and break my- 1.00

01:37:31.560 I don't want some guy in a basement of a YMCA at night 1.00

01:37:34.880 breaking my fucking bones to save 85 bucks, dude. 0.99

01:37:39.660 Spend the extra 85. 0.99

01:37:40.460 But it's just like, Jesus Christ, man.

01:37:43.800 Just slide me off a cliff.

01:37:45.960 Slide me off a cliff.

01:37:47.040 I don't know.

01:37:47.240 Just put me down in a ravine.

01:37:49.300 That's like I learned-

01:37:50.020 You know the song The Way?

01:37:55.200 Where were they going without ever knowing the way?

01:37:59.160 Remember that?

01:37:59.620 Yeah.

01:38:00.300 Anyone can see the road that they walk on is picking-

01:38:03.660 Okay, so I learned online, that song is about a story that the lead singer read about a couple, right?

01:38:10.300 Look at the history of The Way.

01:38:11.820 It's about an old couple who used to vacation somewhere, and she had dementia, and he was old.

01:38:18.920 It's tragic.

01:38:20.000 And they would take this trip.

01:38:22.440 That's the couple.

01:38:23.220 And they got lost.

01:38:26.340 And Austin-based couple, right.

01:38:28.480 Austin-based couple, fastball, top the charts with their hits on the way.

01:38:31.920 Yes.

01:38:33.040 And this real couple, the story is so sad.

01:38:36.300 They like would go to the same location.

01:38:39.540 I think it was like Zion or something like that, or the Archers.

01:38:41.800 And they drove somewhere, and they got lost.

01:38:43.740 And the dementia, you know, they wandered until they were found dead in like a ravine.

01:38:50.080 No.

01:38:50.580 Crazy.

01:38:51.020 Yeah, yeah. 0.55

01:38:51.280 They wandered and got lost.

01:38:52.060 So that song, as beautiful as it was when we were young, I mean, young people don't know that song at all, but it's about this old couple getting lost. 0.99

01:38:59.340 It's the darkest shit. 0.99

01:39:01.040 It's a dark story. 1.00

01:39:02.180 Wow.

01:39:02.860 Yeah, it says, for Layla and Raymond Howard, the tradition was Pioneer Day.

01:39:06.620 That's right.

01:39:07.160 In Temple.

01:39:08.020 Right.

01:39:09.040 And they would drive there, and they would just go.

01:39:12.540 And they, right, showing symptoms of memory loss, and he had had brain surgery.

01:39:18.160 And they just got out of their car, and they started walking, and they just disappeared.

01:39:24.580 Where were they going without ever knowing the way.

01:39:28.440 Isn't that so creepy now that you hear that?

01:39:29.860 Yeah.

01:39:30.100 As a kid, I sung that song being like, anyone can see the road.

01:39:33.740 I thought that was a great song. 0.99

01:39:34.720 And here I am, just two senior citizens, just dehydrated, dying behind a fucking rock. 1.00

01:39:38.720 Just buzzards pecking their head apart. 1.00

01:39:41.080 It's terrible.

01:39:41.800 Fastball.

01:39:42.240 The song's lyrics, this is way better, thank you.

01:39:44.380 The song's lyrics revolve around a couple who decided to leave their lives behind by going out driving without telling their children about their plans.

01:39:51.020 Their car breaks down during the trip, and they continue on foot.

01:39:53.420 The chorus expresses the idea that the couple are achieving happiness by losing touch with the world, even though they may never see their home again.

01:40:00.560 Wild.

01:40:02.380 Wild.

01:40:03.200 Sad.

01:40:04.100 Do you ever have a thought about...

01:40:07.500 Disappearing?

01:40:08.520 Disappearing, yeah.

01:40:09.920 Sometimes I think about like...

01:40:11.420 Like Tupac and...

01:40:12.540 Maybe like two more.

01:40:13.760 Oh, dude, when I was in, we tried to like fake my death or something a while back, maybe like 11 years ago or something.

01:40:20.660 Well, if you got this staff, can't help.

01:40:22.580 I mean, Nick is going to blow it.

01:40:24.220 There's no doubt he'll blow that easily, dude.

01:40:27.600 He'll leak the conversation.

01:40:29.780 Yeah.

01:40:30.280 He's going to leak the plans.

01:40:33.980 But what happened?

01:40:35.160 Oh, my buddy Paul, he's like, dude, we should fake your own death.

01:40:38.760 I think there's some money in it or whatever. 1.00

01:40:40.800 And I was like, oh, fuck. 0.99

01:40:42.100 Well, what do I have to do? 1.00

01:40:43.120 And he's like, you just be quiet and just go out to Palm Springs or something for a couple months or go to Syracuse or something.

01:40:48.960 Yeah. 1.00

01:40:49.160 And I'm like, oh, shit, man. 0.99

01:40:52.620 And I think I did like three days or something. 1.00

01:40:55.140 And then I was like, oh, fuck it, dude. 1.00

01:40:56.380 I'm going to live again. 0.99

01:40:57.180 And so he'd like called a couple people and been like, oh, I think something's happened to Theo or something.

01:41:01.560 Right.

01:41:01.640 So then he just called him back and I was like, oh, no, no, no.

01:41:03.500 He's just fine.

01:41:04.560 You can't...

01:41:05.000 He's in Sacramento or whatever.

01:41:06.560 It's too hard to go through with it.

01:41:08.120 But if I feel like if I was going to disappear, I would go...

01:41:12.060 I'm telling it now.

01:41:13.840 Come find me.

01:41:14.580 I'll be most likely in Banff National Forest.

01:41:18.040 It's the most beautiful place I've ever seen in my entire...

01:41:21.380 Look up Lake Louise. 0.95

01:41:22.500 This might be the prettiest place I've ever seen.

01:41:24.620 And Banff is huge.

01:41:25.520 Banff was the first time I saw a real Canadian moose.

01:41:28.420 I didn't realize...

01:41:28.820 They were as big as a school bus.

01:41:30.040 I got out of my car with my buddy EP.

01:41:31.600 We were laughing so hard.

01:41:32.600 I had tears in my eyes. 0.96

01:41:33.380 I couldn't believe how fucking big it was. 0.96

01:41:35.100 That's Lake Louise. 1.00

01:41:36.200 Wow.

01:41:36.520 Stunning.

01:41:38.020 Banff National Forest.

01:41:38.920 Anywhere.

01:41:39.360 Lose me in Banff.

01:41:40.160 That's where I'll be.

01:41:40.760 I'll be in the woods.

01:41:43.000 Lose me in Banff.

01:41:43.880 Love me in Banff.

01:41:44.940 That might be the story, too.

01:41:45.940 Love me in Banff, baby.

01:41:46.780 If you find someone.

01:41:47.880 Yeah.

01:41:48.100 Lose me and love me in Banff.

01:41:49.880 It's just...

01:41:50.300 Something about it up there.

01:41:51.300 It's so peaceful and...

01:41:52.940 Do they have a summertime?

01:41:54.580 Yeah, yeah, yeah.

01:41:55.180 It's like that right now.

01:41:56.440 It's stunning.

01:41:57.160 Go schwimming. 0.98

01:41:58.700 I...

01:41:59.060 The most beautiful place I've been to, I think, is...

01:42:01.320 Or one place I really liked was this place, Lake...

01:42:03.520 Or Annecy, France.

01:42:05.640 Can you look it up?

01:42:06.820 A...

01:42:07.260 N...

01:42:09.380 Annecy.

01:42:11.220 No.

01:42:11.500 A-N-E-C-Y-A-N... 1.00

01:42:13.280 Oh, there it is.

01:42:13.920 Annecy, France.

01:42:14.680 Right there.

01:42:15.420 Wow.

01:42:16.100 There's this...

01:42:16.760 They have, like, a beautiful lake there.

01:42:18.280 Like, right in this small town.

01:42:19.860 It's really, really cool.

01:42:21.380 How'd you end up there?

01:42:22.320 With my girl.

01:42:22.980 We were backpacking years ago.

01:42:24.380 Beautiful.

01:42:24.540 There it is right there.

01:42:25.460 Wow.

01:42:26.480 Just, like, a nice little place there in the hills.

01:42:28.760 You get you a little backpacking.

01:42:31.240 That was nice.

01:42:32.140 We just were taking a train and just stopped there.

01:42:34.840 Annecy.

01:42:35.360 Annecy, France.

01:42:36.700 France, Annecy.

01:42:37.700 Theo.

01:42:38.640 Oh, yes.

01:42:39.340 Theo Vaughn.

01:42:39.860 Do you know Theo Vaughn?

01:42:41.160 One of my favorite comedians, Theo Vaughn?

01:42:44.380 It is a nice...

01:42:45.180 It is a pleasant...

01:42:46.680 Their accent in English is pleasant.

01:42:49.240 Oh, it's nice.

01:42:49.260 It makes me feel like you're good.

01:42:49.960 Yeah.

01:42:50.460 Because so many others don't.

01:42:51.920 Yeah.

01:42:52.380 Like, when a German is saying to you something, it's... 1.00

01:42:55.220 You're like...

01:42:56.220 Yeah.

01:42:57.280 Yeah.

01:42:57.600 It just...

01:42:58.320 Well, yeah.

01:42:59.620 I went to Jamaica and two guys, you know,

01:43:01.960 I went, we...

01:43:02.740 Somebody had...

01:43:03.400 We went into a Starbucks, right?

01:43:04.860 Founds out it was not a Starbucks.

01:43:07.200 We go in.

01:43:07.720 Somebody had stole the sign and put it up outside of their business, right?

01:43:10.460 So we go in.

01:43:11.780 You immediately... 0.99

01:43:12.480 You're like, this isn't a fucking Starbucks. 1.00

01:43:13.880 There's couches and shit, dude. 1.00

01:43:15.080 Yeah. 0.99

01:43:15.280 There's no cake pops here.

01:43:16.380 Yeah.

01:43:16.720 There was a hammock.

01:43:17.840 I was like...

01:43:18.660 And then somebody goes,

01:43:22.240 Welcome to the Starbucka Lounge. 0.99

01:43:25.420 And we're like, where the fuck are we, dude? 0.98

01:43:27.760 We turn to go and leave. 0.99

01:43:30.080 Knife fight, dude.

01:43:31.620 Really?

01:43:32.160 Oh, my God.

01:43:32.380 Beyond B, knife fight in the street, dude.

01:43:34.740 Well...

01:43:35.300 Urban cutlery, dude.

01:43:36.800 That's it, bro.

01:43:37.920 Just butter knives.

01:43:39.280 A couple of...

01:43:39.960 Just a couple of Zorro brothers out there.

01:43:42.080 Brothers stabbing each other, dude.

01:43:46.460 What else, man?

01:43:47.380 What happened with you and Bobby Althoff?

01:43:48.940 Do you remember that?

01:43:49.780 Yeah, it was fun.

01:43:50.620 We had a...

01:43:50.960 It was really, really fun.

01:43:52.100 Dude, you were so funny on there.

01:43:53.600 She, she was, she was, uh...

01:43:56.580 It was easy to kind of play into this world that she does.

01:44:00.620 She stays in the world of, like...

01:44:02.700 She was doing, like, musicians.

01:44:04.800 And then she was doing, uh...

01:44:07.320 Then she would just do, like, high-level celebrities,

01:44:09.440 like Cuban and all these guys.

01:44:10.740 And I had so much fun with her because she had said...

01:44:14.440 They originally...

01:44:15.160 They pitched me...

01:44:16.060 Her team pitched me,

01:44:17.960 Do you want to teach her how to golf?

01:44:21.700 Uh, no, I'm sorry.

01:44:22.940 Teach her how to do stand-up.

01:44:24.420 I said, absolutely not.

01:44:26.200 But I said, I am going to go golf next week.

01:44:28.480 You want to meet and I can teach her how to golf

01:44:30.580 or we can do a golf thing.

01:44:31.940 And that's how this stuff was born.

01:44:33.160 And she showed up late with a big attitude. 1.00

01:44:36.560 Mm-hmm.

01:44:37.600 And I started...

01:44:38.120 Oh, yeah, she's kind of like a black woman, a little. 1.00

01:44:40.200 Yeah, yeah, yeah. 0.93

01:44:40.860 A little tiny black woman. 0.99

01:44:42.080 And I started, uh... 0.89

01:44:43.740 I was, you know, just goofing with her the whole time.

01:44:45.820 And it was so much fun.

01:44:47.160 Now she's, you know, off and running.

01:44:49.340 She's got a whole... 1.00

01:44:50.740 Her career, like, exploded now.

01:44:53.240 Her podcast is bigger than ever.

01:44:54.700 She stays busy, man.

01:44:55.600 Yeah, I saw her at Formula One.

01:44:56.940 She was there with...

01:44:57.520 And some of her friends, they were having a great time.

01:44:59.680 I wanted to go to that.

01:45:00.600 I wanted to go to that so bad.

01:45:01.780 It's too confusing.

01:45:02.840 It's like, you don't know what's going on

01:45:04.340 and everybody's, like, rich and everything. 1.00

01:45:06.420 You're like, what the fuck? 0.99

01:45:07.340 So rich and it's all... 1.00

01:45:08.620 And you...

01:45:08.980 But you don't really get to see anything.

01:45:10.060 That's the worst part about the pit.

01:45:11.380 It's down here.

01:45:12.080 You're like this.

01:45:13.000 It's like being...

01:45:13.920 That's the irony of the best seats in a football game

01:45:17.060 are not all the way down.

01:45:18.740 Yeah.

01:45:18.900 Because you're this.

01:45:19.600 I agree. 1.00

01:45:20.200 Front row is trash. 1.00

01:45:21.140 Yeah, you can't... 0.99

01:45:21.740 You're doing this all the time.

01:45:23.600 You want to be a little bit...

01:45:24.020 If even somebody comes to my show

01:45:24.800 and they're in front row, 0.98

01:45:25.520 I'm like, God, it sucks, dude. 0.97

01:45:27.180 They're doing this the whole time. 0.99

01:45:28.020 Their neck is craned.

01:45:29.560 Their neck is the Las Vegas crane the whole time.

01:45:32.200 Dude, what was one of the early concerts

01:45:34.440 you ever went to?

01:45:35.080 Do you remember?

01:45:36.680 The very...

01:45:37.440 One of the very first concerts I went to,

01:45:39.380 probably...

01:45:40.760 Well, I remember...

01:45:41.360 I think this one sticks out for some reason.

01:45:43.340 And I don't know if it was one of my first,

01:45:45.720 but no doubt I saw them

01:45:48.800 and a band called Face to Face.

01:45:50.400 Do you remember those guys?

01:45:52.140 Face to Face.

01:45:52.560 Face to Face.

01:45:52.980 Face to Face.

01:45:53.640 Face to Face and No Doubt were playing...

01:45:55.520 Which was a night.

01:45:56.440 Is that them?

01:45:57.360 No, no, no.

01:45:57.940 They were...

01:45:58.880 Face to Face to Face.

01:46:00.860 That's...

01:46:01.100 You're thinking about...

01:46:01.820 That's Duran Duran, I think.

01:46:03.900 Where I could...

01:46:04.880 No, that's...

01:46:05.500 No, that's...

01:46:06.240 No, that's Culture Club.

01:46:07.480 No, that's...

01:46:08.360 But I think Face to Face and No Doubt

01:46:11.380 were one of my first, and then...

01:46:13.200 Wow, who took you to that?

01:46:15.680 No, I probably was 16 or 17.

01:46:18.740 Love her, dude.

01:46:19.480 I think she's one of the greatest.

01:46:21.840 Tragic Kingdom.

01:46:22.420 That album is so, so good.

01:46:24.880 I became a teenage girl

01:46:25.960 while listening to that.

01:46:27.080 I was like,

01:46:27.420 this is my girl phase.

01:46:28.800 Oh, I cried at school

01:46:30.160 when someone sang Jewel once.

01:46:31.920 Oh, yeah.

01:46:32.260 Well, that'll hit you hard.

01:46:33.620 And I just...

01:46:34.180 I'd never heard a woman sing.

01:46:35.420 Who will save your soul

01:46:37.420 in the light that you don't want.

01:46:39.560 And then you hear her regular talk,

01:46:40.680 and she's like... 0.87

01:46:41.180 I'm a donkey, I'm a donkey, 0.81

01:46:42.680 I'm a donkey. 0.73

01:46:44.060 Oh, it's just something 0.77

01:46:44.760 that's in the New Orleans Avenue.

01:46:47.160 It's so good.

01:46:48.200 Yeah.

01:46:48.620 That, and then I saw...

01:46:50.180 And then the Up and Smoke tour.

01:46:51.740 Up and Smoke?

01:46:52.400 Look that up if that's right.

01:46:53.140 Cypress Hill?

01:46:53.900 Yeah, Up and Smoke tour.

01:46:54.900 Oh, yeah, I was at that day.

01:46:55.940 It was like Method Man and Red Man.

01:46:58.480 Cypress Hill.

01:46:59.000 It was anybody black or white with weed.

01:47:02.340 That's what it was, dude.

01:47:03.280 Right, right, right.

01:47:03.540 Cypress Hill.

01:47:04.040 Yeah, that was it.

01:47:04.780 That whole tour.

01:47:05.100 Yeah, Dre, Eminem.

01:47:06.260 And the crazy thing was,

01:47:07.080 you were so high,

01:47:08.220 they could have told you

01:47:09.320 somebody was on stage,

01:47:10.320 you'd have been like, yeah.

01:47:10.920 Wouldn't have mattered.

01:47:11.500 Yeah, didn't even know.

01:47:12.760 Nate Dogg never was there.

01:47:14.380 They put him on every picture.

01:47:15.820 I never saw Nate Dogg once live.

01:47:18.080 They probably just used him like...

01:47:19.660 He was late to every show.

01:47:21.160 Promo, yeah.

01:47:21.420 Yeah, he just never showed up.

01:47:23.020 That's like Boss Man D'Lo

01:47:24.800 was supposed to come on the pod 1.00

01:47:25.700 and fucking... 1.00

01:47:26.400 Just bailed. 1.00

01:47:27.140 20 minutes after,

01:47:29.300 he's like, I ain't coming.

01:47:30.900 Thanks, man.

01:47:31.480 Thanks for the heads up.

01:47:32.120 Yeah, thanks, Boss Man, dude.

01:47:33.760 There he is.

01:47:34.380 You've been demoted to assistant boss, brother.

01:47:38.240 I'll still listen to your music,

01:47:39.380 but not for two weeks.

01:47:41.120 Yeah, that was the first couple of...

01:47:42.260 Those...

01:47:42.700 I saw...

01:47:43.200 Those like...

01:47:44.100 I saw D12.

01:47:45.020 I saw Eminem and D12.

01:47:46.200 Wow, so you could listen to a lot of rap stuff

01:47:47.960 and some Gwen Stefani.

01:47:49.380 Dude, yeah, I remember we had a fashion show

01:47:52.100 at our school

01:47:52.640 and some girl sang Jewel

01:47:54.560 and played the piano

01:47:55.320 and I just never like...

01:47:57.520 I don't think had a...

01:47:58.420 I'd never really...

01:48:00.000 No woman had ever really spoken nicely to me, 1.00

01:48:02.280 I don't think.

01:48:02.880 And it was like...

01:48:04.000 I just didn't even know what was going on.

01:48:05.840 It was emotional.

01:48:06.640 Yes.

01:48:07.080 Yeah, it's emotional. 0.98

01:48:07.480 And I just remember fucking bawling 0.98

01:48:10.060 and then somebody yelled out, 1.00

01:48:11.400 F***! 1.00

01:48:13.400 And I was like, holy shit, dude. 1.00

01:48:14.860 Shit, dude. 1.00

01:48:15.200 Let me get these tears off of me real quick. 1.00

01:48:16.600 Get your shit together, dude. 0.99

01:48:18.380 I was like, I'm only crying 1.00

01:48:19.600 because I'm thirsty 0.98

01:48:20.520 and then I just fucking drank 0.98

01:48:21.680 a bunch of it off my own. 0.97

01:48:22.640 I was like, oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

01:48:28.280 That's actually more manly, yeah.

01:48:30.960 I'm thirsty.

01:48:32.880 And then you know what else I saw?

01:48:34.460 I saw...

01:48:35.300 And then the other end of the spectrum

01:48:36.440 was my buddy, John,

01:48:41.420 took me to see Bella Fleck,

01:48:45.900 the jam band world.

01:48:47.240 String Cheese, all those guys.

01:48:48.980 I got to see all that stuff.

01:48:50.120 So I touched a lot of basses.

01:48:51.180 I just wanted to go to live shows.

01:48:53.880 I loved live shows.

01:48:55.040 I'd go to almost any live show.

01:48:57.060 Like, if someone was like,

01:48:58.240 we're going to a live concert,

01:48:59.700 this band is playing, you know,

01:49:01.680 blah, blah, blah, Aragon Ballroom, whatever.

01:49:03.760 Okay.

01:49:04.300 I didn't even think twice I would go

01:49:05.540 just because I was like,

01:49:06.080 this is an opportunity to go goof off

01:49:07.860 and disappear with friends into the night.

01:49:09.680 Yeah.

01:49:10.080 Like, I didn't...

01:49:10.820 I wasn't really...

01:49:11.780 I wasn't really picky.

01:49:14.000 Now, which is crazy,

01:49:14.840 I wish I should go to more shows.

01:49:16.080 I don't go to as many shows

01:49:16.880 because we work in entertainment.

01:49:18.800 So...

01:49:19.080 It's hard.

01:49:19.380 You work at nights when shows happen.

01:49:20.440 It's tough.

01:49:21.040 It's just hard.

01:49:22.000 It's hard.

01:49:22.280 I was just looking today.

01:49:22.960 I was like,

01:49:23.380 what shows can I go see?

01:49:24.540 I saw Red Clay Strays recently.

01:49:26.800 They're great if you get to see them.

01:49:30.040 Dude, I remember, yeah,

01:49:31.160 we got so...

01:49:31.760 I think we went to 311 a couple times

01:49:33.660 when I was in school.

01:49:34.560 You know, that was always fun.

01:49:35.820 They were phenomenal, man.

01:49:37.060 And we went...

01:49:38.960 I got...

01:49:39.620 We were leaving.

01:49:40.580 Oh.

01:49:42.040 Yeah, we were leaving. 0.96

01:49:43.100 I fucking drilled some dude with my car, right? 0.99

01:49:46.320 Hit his car. 0.99

01:49:47.240 Oh, I thought you said hit the guy.

01:49:48.400 No, thank God he was in his car

01:49:49.860 when I hit him.

01:49:50.840 Get out of my car,

01:49:51.840 run up to his window.

01:49:52.720 He goes,

01:49:53.220 dude, I'm so sorry, dude. 0.99

01:49:56.240 He was so fucked up, 0.99

01:49:57.400 he fucking thought he hit me. 1.00

01:50:01.040 Apologize to you. 0.97

01:50:02.420 Yeah, I was like...

01:50:02.800 Do my bad.

01:50:03.320 You're like, yes. 0.94

01:50:04.200 You're bad.

01:50:04.640 I'm like, yeah, dude, 1.00

01:50:05.080 you gotta fucking... 1.00

01:50:05.860 You gotta be careful, bud. 1.00

01:50:07.020 Bro, these streets are small, dude. 0.99

01:50:08.980 And I fucking... 0.99

01:50:09.540 I went and got back in my car 0.99

01:50:10.820 and took off. 1.00

01:50:12.940 Fuck, that dude was fucked up. 1.00

01:50:14.900 Another time I went to Green Day. 1.00

01:50:16.580 That might have been the first I ever saw.

01:50:18.320 The opening band for them,

01:50:19.940 I was so high.

01:50:21.540 I thought the opening band was Green Day.

01:50:23.780 Sang every Green Day song

01:50:25.300 while the opening band was up there.

01:50:27.560 I think it was like Rusted Rooters. 0.98

01:50:29.500 I don't know who it was, right?

01:50:30.740 Sang all... 0.99

01:50:31.600 And then fucking was ready to leave. 0.99

01:50:33.180 My buddy's like, 0.99

01:50:33.880 dude, they're not even on yet.

01:50:35.520 Another time...

01:50:36.360 You already had that Green Day show. 1.00

01:50:37.700 Somebody gave me some fucking... 1.00

01:50:39.000 Yeah, somebody gave me some fucking 1.00

01:50:40.440 raccoon pills or something. 0.99

01:50:43.000 And I was just fucking out there raccoon, 0.99

01:50:44.880 you know? 0.99

01:50:45.220 And I fucking couldn't see anymore. 0.98

01:50:47.780 So I could only see with my hands, right? 0.98

01:50:49.380 And so I wandered to the back

01:50:51.600 and started feeling on a cop, dude. 0.99

01:50:53.680 I fucking... 1.00

01:50:54.480 He fucking took... 1.00

01:50:56.920 Made me leave. 1.00

01:50:58.580 And then...

01:50:59.540 What else happened good at a concert?

01:51:02.740 Oh, there was one thing

01:51:03.760 I was gonna tell you.

01:51:04.600 Oh, dude.

01:51:05.300 So the other night,

01:51:06.120 I'm in Las Vegas

01:51:06.800 and my brother came, right?

01:51:09.180 And it was fun.

01:51:09.740 We had a great time.

01:51:11.660 And then afterwards,

01:51:12.480 there's a restaurant in the wind

01:51:13.320 called Delilah, right?

01:51:14.380 It's like a nice place.

01:51:15.280 Yeah, yeah.

01:51:15.640 I've been there.

01:51:16.040 It's nice.

01:51:16.180 It's like F. Scott's Fitzgerald's vibe.

01:51:18.740 You know, it's pretty cool.

01:51:19.840 So we sit in there

01:51:20.760 and Fat Joe was in there.

01:51:22.720 So he goes on stage,

01:51:24.080 Joey Crack, right?

01:51:25.080 Terror Squad.

01:51:25.960 Love him.

01:51:26.580 And at first,

01:51:27.320 like it's going pretty good.

01:51:28.620 You know,

01:51:28.780 some people are kind of into it.

01:51:30.020 Some people aren't.

01:51:31.360 I'm standing up,

01:51:32.380 like kind of singing

01:51:33.200 and cheering and stuff

01:51:33.800 because a friend of mine

01:51:35.020 loves Fat Joe

01:51:36.400 and they're close

01:51:36.980 and so I wanted to be respectful, right?

01:51:39.520 But some people are in there

01:51:40.540 being a little bit too cool.

01:51:42.040 But then he's like,

01:51:42.700 play another one, man. 0.99

01:51:43.800 And they fucking play 1.00

01:51:44.540 and then people are like, 1.00

01:51:45.220 oh shit, 0.99

01:51:45.620 he did that song too? 1.00

01:51:46.900 And then it kept fucking stacking up. 0.99

01:51:49.000 Then he, 0.99

01:51:49.600 next thing you know,

01:51:50.520 because it was NBA Summer League

01:51:53.460 or something going on there.

01:51:54.800 So the place starts getting packed.

01:51:56.580 He's been on stage

01:51:57.060 for like 25 minutes.

01:51:58.240 Then Ja Rule's in there. 0.99

01:51:59.320 He fucking brings Ja Rule up, baby. 1.00

01:52:01.640 Damn, dude. 1.00

01:52:02.120 So then Akon is fucking, 1.00

01:52:04.300 they were like, 1.00

01:52:04.680 damn, Akon. 0.99

01:52:05.620 He's out of prison. 1.00

01:52:06.400 I thought he got deported, dude. 0.99

01:52:08.760 And he fucking pulls him up, dude. 0.98

01:52:10.760 He got a work release for him 0.99

01:52:11.920 for about 10 minutes.

01:52:13.420 Brings him up on stage.

01:52:14.840 By the end, dude.

01:52:16.400 Fat Joe.

01:52:17.180 It was unbelievable, bro.

01:52:19.860 That's what a show. 0.99

01:52:21.220 It was so.

01:52:21.820 And unexpected.

01:52:22.600 You didn't know he was going on?

01:52:23.800 No.

01:52:24.240 Oh, that's wild.

01:52:25.460 When that kind of stuff happens,

01:52:26.320 that's unbelievable.

01:52:27.220 When they're like,

01:52:27.540 yeah, we'll just,

01:52:28.820 I guess we'll just play a song.

01:52:30.020 Yeah.

01:52:30.260 And someone shows up,

01:52:31.200 someone shows up.

01:52:31.820 I've never,

01:52:32.220 I've heard about these,

01:52:33.020 this is like lore to me.

01:52:34.640 I've only been at shows

01:52:35.640 that are, you know,

01:52:36.520 supposed to happen.

01:52:37.540 I've never been lucky

01:52:38.200 with like, dude,

01:52:38.740 and then it just turned

01:52:39.980 into a concert.

01:52:41.000 Yeah.

01:52:41.900 Lucky boy.

01:52:42.900 Before you get out of here,

01:52:43.940 people see you with the Kelseys

01:52:45.520 all the time.

01:52:46.080 What's their life like now?

01:52:47.300 Do you know any,

01:52:48.260 from when you first met them,

01:52:49.560 kind of,

01:52:49.800 do things seem any different?

01:52:51.120 They're definitely,

01:52:52.460 you know,

01:52:52.920 it's,

01:52:54.060 fame and popularity

01:52:54.860 are interesting.

01:52:56.300 Yeah.

01:52:56.580 And kind of scary.

01:52:58.000 So scary and weird.

01:52:59.060 I mean,

01:52:59.660 I met Travis a while ago.

01:53:02.280 Jason,

01:53:02.680 I'm new,

01:53:03.060 I'm new to know.

01:53:04.900 I met him through,

01:53:05.780 through Travis.

01:53:07.980 And Travis is,

01:53:09.900 I,

01:53:10.200 I've said this before

01:53:11.360 and I mean it.

01:53:12.080 He's,

01:53:12.600 he's been the same

01:53:13.800 since I met him.

01:53:14.900 If I texted him now

01:53:16.120 and said,

01:53:16.780 joking around about something,

01:53:17.880 he would,

01:53:18.500 he would joke just

01:53:19.400 as we were back then.

01:53:21.200 I think,

01:53:22.060 you know,

01:53:22.800 he's much more,

01:53:24.260 he's much busier now

01:53:25.420 than he's ever been

01:53:26.120 because of his life

01:53:27.340 and his growth

01:53:28.300 and his career.

01:53:29.220 And then the,

01:53:29.940 the confluence of him

01:53:30.980 dating the most famous

01:53:31.940 woman on earth 1.00

01:53:33.040 is wild,

01:53:34.080 but he's a hundred percent

01:53:35.240 the same cat.

01:53:36.200 I mean,

01:53:36.460 like it's,

01:53:37.200 it's,

01:53:37.600 I don't think I've ever

01:53:38.860 experienced it that level

01:53:41.060 where he's the same guy.

01:53:42.320 Same guy.

01:53:42.720 As,

01:53:43.120 and he's bigger

01:53:44.100 than he's ever been,

01:53:44.820 but I don't know,

01:53:46.720 man,

01:53:46.820 he's been,

01:53:47.200 he's always kind of

01:53:47.900 been that dude

01:53:48.580 and I think

01:53:49.360 he wasn't going to let

01:53:50.940 this change him.

01:53:52.320 I don't know if that's

01:53:53.060 a good or a bad thing.

01:53:53.760 I'm not smart enough

01:53:54.420 to understand,

01:53:55.100 but.

01:53:55.560 Well,

01:53:55.680 it's probably a good thing.

01:53:56.480 I hope,

01:53:57.340 I would hope so.

01:53:57.900 Cause he has to be

01:53:58.460 in that league too.

01:53:59.500 It's like,

01:53:59.800 you can,

01:54:00.080 you know what I'm saying?

01:54:00.700 Like.

01:54:01.320 Yeah,

01:54:01.460 but it's,

01:54:01.680 it's,

01:54:01.960 it's like a different

01:54:02.620 kind of stardom now.

01:54:03.860 It's weird.

01:54:04.660 And it's critical.

01:54:05.480 It's crazy critical

01:54:06.340 for no reason.

01:54:07.180 You know,

01:54:07.340 like the fans are,

01:54:08.480 they pick apart

01:54:09.940 everything you wear,

01:54:10.740 everything you do,

01:54:11.340 everything you say

01:54:11.880 in that Taylor Swift world.

01:54:13.280 So it's,

01:54:13.960 it's,

01:54:14.640 I know,

01:54:15.320 thank you.

01:54:15.720 I don't,

01:54:15.960 I don't,

01:54:16.220 I don't want that kind of,

01:54:17.220 we already get enough

01:54:17.820 criticism as comics.

01:54:19.200 And most of the time

01:54:20.040 it's like,

01:54:20.980 what do you, 0.99

01:54:21.380 we're fucking around. 0.99

01:54:22.100 Like we're, 0.99

01:54:22.620 we're joking.

01:54:23.680 But with him,

01:54:24.840 it's gotta be,

01:54:26.660 it's poignancy.

01:54:27.740 It's like,

01:54:27.980 everything has to be

01:54:28.840 legitimized and talked about.

01:54:30.920 And I don't know how I,

01:54:32.280 how he handles it,

01:54:33.120 but he does it really well. 0.99

01:54:34.180 I think also he doesn't give a shit 0.99

01:54:35.300 cause he's just enjoying life. 0.99

01:54:36.820 Do you think he's a government op?

01:54:38.840 There's been a lot of people

01:54:40.060 that say that,

01:54:40.820 you know,

01:54:41.440 he was,

01:54:42.160 he has been coerced

01:54:43.140 by the government many times

01:54:44.200 to try to join forces

01:54:45.640 and he refuses

01:54:46.500 from what I know.

01:54:47.400 Every time he calls me,

01:54:49.040 you know,

01:54:49.380 they,

01:54:49.600 they offer him something

01:54:50.840 to try to be a part of,

01:54:52.960 you know,

01:54:53.140 he's been offered to be,

01:54:54.300 play for the chargers.

01:54:55.140 A hundred percent.

01:54:55.620 And he will not.

01:54:56.400 Absolutely not.

01:54:57.160 No chance.

01:54:57.920 We're not doing that.

01:54:58.900 They asked him to move

01:54:59.700 to Brussels for a little while,

01:55:01.260 the government,

01:55:01.960 and he wouldn't do that.

01:55:02.740 So he's never,

01:55:03.880 he's never really

01:55:04.680 gone through with it

01:55:05.900 cause there's no amount of money

01:55:06.660 you could convince him

01:55:07.460 and he's not going to do it.

01:55:09.220 He'll stand his ground.

01:55:10.320 Kelsey is not going to 1.00

01:55:11.660 work for the government.

01:55:13.700 He's a stay on your ground guy.

01:55:15.060 He's a stay on your ground guy.

01:55:15.740 He's a stay on your ground.

01:55:16.800 He's a fight guy.

01:55:17.880 Yes.

01:55:18.360 Fight,

01:55:18.760 fight,

01:55:19.260 fight.

01:55:19.740 That was crazy,

01:55:20.660 wasn't it?

01:55:20.920 That's amazing. 0.94

01:55:21.840 If I get shot, 0.96

01:55:22.660 dude, 0.91

01:55:23.480 I'm out,

01:55:24.220 bro.

01:55:24.460 That dude.

01:55:25.080 I'm crawling out.

01:55:26.260 Even,

01:55:26.580 even my ear.

01:55:27.600 If someone,

01:55:27.940 as small as my ear

01:55:28.860 the whole time.

01:55:29.640 Yeah.

01:55:30.640 I'm crying,

01:55:31.200 I'm crying my ear,

01:55:32.340 my ear.

01:55:33.040 I'm,

01:55:33.180 I'm certainly not fight.

01:55:34.580 That's a new level

01:55:35.340 of bravery.

01:55:36.140 No,

01:55:36.340 I will just post fight

01:55:37.420 on Twitter.

01:55:38.520 I wouldn't even post.

01:55:39.180 That's what Twitter's for.

01:55:40.440 Twitter is for when you get shot,

01:55:42.280 then you say what you want.

01:55:44.840 Yeah.

01:55:46.020 I wish they would.

01:55:47.120 Yeah.

01:55:47.680 Try me one more time.

01:55:49.600 Yeah.

01:55:49.980 I'm not saying fight out loud.

01:55:51.140 That's begging for another person.

01:55:53.880 Do you see that

01:55:54.540 home run derby winner?

01:55:55.420 Let's get you out of here. 1.00

01:55:56.160 Who was that guy?

01:55:56.940 Who won it?

01:55:58.740 Titan Zane.

01:56:00.680 And it's a child?

01:56:01.580 That's a phenomenal name.

01:56:04.820 Titan Zane.

01:56:06.460 Titan Zane.

01:56:07.340 That is an incredible name,

01:56:08.920 dude.

01:56:09.080 Yeah.

01:56:09.520 You better be good

01:56:10.320 at something,

01:56:10.840 though.

01:56:11.300 Six-year-old Titan Zane.

01:56:12.900 Look at the size of that kid.

01:56:14.100 Whoa,

01:56:14.280 dude.

01:56:14.520 That's a woman? 1.00

01:56:16.640 My God.

01:56:17.020 Oh,

01:56:17.140 that's a,

01:56:17.480 that's a guy.

01:56:18.400 Wow.

01:56:19.880 Jesus Christ. 1.00

01:56:20.840 Holy shit, 1.00

01:56:22.240 dude. 1.00

01:56:22.560 And look at the kids next to him.

01:56:23.860 They're a quarter of his size. 1.00

01:56:27.020 Damn, 1.00

01:56:27.480 dude, 1.00

01:56:27.580 that's incredible.

01:56:28.840 Titan Zane,

01:56:30.300 bro.

01:56:30.860 The turn is amazing.

01:56:31.580 Look at the turn.

01:56:32.180 The hips.

01:56:33.280 Belt facing the target.

01:56:34.560 It's all hip,

01:56:35.680 dude.

01:56:36.160 That's all hips, 1.00

01:56:37.040 dude.

01:56:37.120 Wow,

01:56:37.400 those end up.

01:56:37.800 Same height as Bobby,

01:56:39.300 too,

01:56:39.540 which is crazy.

01:56:40.180 Yeah,

01:56:40.520 same weight,

01:56:41.060 same height and weight.

01:56:42.860 Let me see that clip again

01:56:43.940 of him swinging.

01:56:44.840 They used to call him

01:56:45.480 Blobby Lee.

01:56:46.260 That was the saddest.

01:56:47.400 It was mean,

01:56:48.500 but it was true.

01:56:50.200 Oh,

01:56:50.560 Titan Zane.

01:56:51.320 The name is great.

01:56:52.720 Oh! 0.60

01:56:53.360 Oh! 0.60

01:56:54.780 He was reaching for the stars.

01:56:56.080 You know this guy,

01:56:56.740 man.

01:56:56.900 He was getting...

01:56:58.160 That kid is scared.

01:56:59.280 You see that kid step back.

01:57:00.240 So scared,

01:57:00.740 yeah.

01:57:00.800 He couldn't handle it.

01:57:02.480 Titan Zane.

01:57:04.020 Dude,

01:57:04.360 that's Uncrustables

01:57:05.260 at its finest

01:57:05.920 right there,

01:57:06.580 baby.

01:57:06.640 Oh my God,

01:57:07.020 that's awful.

01:57:07.960 Look at that,

01:57:08.680 bro. 0.95

01:57:09.240 Look at that frickin'... 0.94

01:57:11.100 Oh! 0.97

01:57:13.660 Savage,

01:57:14.060 bro.

01:57:14.080 Good for that kid,

01:57:14.920 man.

01:57:15.220 St. Louis Pinto Tournament,

01:57:17.480 Home Run Derby,

01:57:18.200 Titan Zane.

01:57:19.720 Good for you,

01:57:20.440 TZ.

01:57:21.160 That's what we want.

01:57:21.660 That's who you got to adopt,

01:57:22.780 dude.

01:57:23.160 TZ.

01:57:23.720 I would adopt 100%.

01:57:24.920 Get a Polynesian. 0.96

01:57:26.700 I'm looking for one.

01:57:27.460 What brand do you go

01:57:28.260 if you adopt, man?

01:57:29.240 What do you got?

01:57:29.580 Islands.

01:57:30.060 Islands.

01:57:30.620 Gotta get an island.

01:57:31.560 Yeah.

01:57:32.180 Just because that little guitar

01:57:33.280 they come with.

01:57:34.040 Right.

01:57:34.520 Yeah.

01:57:34.860 It's part of the package.

01:57:35.840 Oh.

01:57:36.300 But you gotta buy more strings.

01:57:37.420 They break them often.

01:57:38.740 But the craziest thing is

01:57:39.720 it's like they take

01:57:40.540 the biggest guy.

01:57:42.800 Little guitar.

01:57:43.860 That's poetry, baby.

01:57:45.920 That's poetry.

01:57:46.620 That's poetry.

01:57:48.260 That's beautiful poetry.

01:57:49.640 It's art.

01:57:50.540 It really is.

01:57:51.340 You don't get to see it much.

01:57:52.600 Mm-mm.

01:57:53.960 New tour,

01:57:56.020 Freeze Peach. 0.97

01:57:57.360 Freeze Peach Tour,

01:57:58.520 new tour,

01:57:59.040 I'm doing 20 some odd cities.

01:58:00.780 Hell yeah.

01:58:01.720 Are you going to Chicago?

01:58:03.000 Yeah,

01:58:03.400 playing Chicago Theater.

01:58:04.900 I think I'm not doing that

01:58:05.900 until the new year.

01:58:07.920 I think I'm in January.

01:58:11.000 So some in the fall,

01:58:11.800 some in the spring.

01:58:12.980 Yeah,

01:58:13.280 yeah.

01:58:13.800 I tour through,

01:58:14.820 I go through from September,

01:58:16.620 to February

01:58:17.640 and then I end

01:58:18.700 to February

01:58:19.380 in Minnesota,

01:58:21.900 Minneapolis.

01:58:22.400 And Bad Friends isn't,

01:58:23.280 you guys are just

01:58:24.320 banking some episodes.

01:58:25.240 Yeah,

01:58:25.540 we're going to do Australia.

01:58:27.760 We're touring in Australia

01:58:28.740 in the middle of my tour.

01:58:30.540 And then we both are going to, 0.81

01:58:31.880 he's going to shoot something.

01:58:33.060 I'm gone.

01:58:34.600 He's getting popular again.

01:58:36.100 He had dinner last night

01:58:37.200 with,

01:58:38.800 or not dinner,

01:58:39.580 they met up,

01:58:40.360 Michael Bay.

01:58:41.120 Michael Bay wanted to meet up

01:58:42.100 with him.

01:58:42.600 Really?

01:58:43.140 Yeah,

01:58:43.340 Michael Bay

01:58:43.980 to hash some old beef.

01:58:45.220 Michael Bay had some beef with him.

01:58:46.980 Apparently he had said something

01:58:47.860 on the pod

01:58:48.420 and Michael Bay was like,

01:58:49.660 I want to set the record straight.

01:58:51.020 So they met last night.

01:58:52.340 Some Mongolian beef, huh?

01:58:53.920 Uh-huh.

01:58:54.480 Yeah, dude,

01:58:54.980 some beef and broccoli,

01:58:55.740 this guy.

01:58:56.140 I'll show you the picture.

01:58:57.240 He was pretty impressive,

01:58:59.160 by the way.

01:58:59.520 He said to me,

01:59:00.140 he was nervous.

01:59:01.860 He was nervous.

01:59:02.580 But here,

01:59:03.080 that's him and Michael.

01:59:04.020 No way,

01:59:04.460 that's Michael Bay?

01:59:05.600 Yeah. 0.99

01:59:06.380 And who's that little fucking... 1.00

01:59:08.120 Yeah, 1.00

01:59:08.620 yeah,

01:59:09.060 I don't know,

01:59:09.740 I don't know if,

01:59:10.400 anyway,

01:59:10.800 he talked about it on Rogan.

01:59:12.000 That was the problem.

01:59:12.660 Michael heard about it

01:59:13.540 and was like...

01:59:14.220 Pan-faced,

01:59:15.060 somebody called him that?

01:59:16.840 He said...

01:59:17.420 And it wasn't one of us?

01:59:18.580 No,

01:59:18.980 well,

01:59:19.380 it was.

01:59:20.220 I think he just heard it wrong.

01:59:21.600 Right.

01:59:21.820 We might have said it,

01:59:22.560 Michael Bay produced it.

01:59:24.240 He directed it.

01:59:25.120 Yeah,

01:59:25.440 yeah.

01:59:25.960 And action.

01:59:27.420 Let's do it again.

01:59:28.260 Yeah,

01:59:28.400 we did it like seven or eight times.

01:59:29.860 Can you believe Michael Bay said that to him?

01:59:32.080 No way.

01:59:32.620 No,

01:59:32.800 he didn't say it to him.

01:59:33.480 That's why I think that's inflated.

01:59:35.220 But he met with him last night,

01:59:36.240 so I wonder,

01:59:36.720 I'm gonna,

01:59:37.380 after this,

01:59:37.900 we're meeting up,

01:59:38.420 so I want to hear what he said.

01:59:39.660 I'm curious to know

01:59:40.660 how he directed his feelings.

01:59:43.040 Oh,

01:59:43.220 yeah.

01:59:43.580 Look,

01:59:43.840 I've got a dumpling of steam with you,

01:59:45.440 Bobby.

01:59:45.740 Mm-hmm.

01:59:46.340 You know,

01:59:46.780 we're gonna get to the bottom of this.

01:59:48.820 I want to come and do Bad Friends,

01:59:50.180 man.

01:59:50.280 You got it,

01:59:50.600 man.

01:59:50.840 I'd love to.

01:59:55.120 Get to this.

01:59:55.680 It was amazing,

01:59:56.440 man.

01:59:56.740 One of the best shows,

01:59:57.440 and if you have a chance,

01:59:58.660 you know,

01:59:58.960 I don't know when this comes out,

02:00:00.040 but they only got a couple weeks left

02:00:01.440 of the tour.

02:00:03.560 I think they end

02:00:04.140 second week of August

02:00:05.920 or something like that.

02:00:06.800 They don't have much left.

02:00:07.860 Yeah,

02:00:08.040 I think they're on break for a little bit,

02:00:09.140 and then they have one more week

02:00:10.160 in Vegas,

02:00:11.060 I think.

02:00:11.560 Yeah,

02:00:11.780 they do a couple back-to-backs,

02:00:13.180 and then it's,

02:00:13.960 and then,

02:00:14.680 inside tip,

02:00:16.260 if you are a Dead & Company fan

02:00:17.820 or a dead fan at all,

02:00:19.200 the rumor is that it,

02:00:21.020 this,

02:00:21.420 there is no plans to do it again,

02:00:23.200 so who knows?

02:00:23.740 This could be one of the last times.

02:00:25.080 I mean,

02:00:25.260 who knows?

02:00:26.000 Might not be,

02:00:26.560 might be,

02:00:27.000 yeah,

02:00:27.320 August,

02:00:27.680 there you go,

02:00:28.000 that's second week of August,

02:00:28.840 and then that,

02:00:29.400 that's it,

02:00:30.020 baby.

02:00:30.280 That's crazy.

02:00:30.940 One,

02:00:31.100 two,

02:00:31.240 three,

02:00:31.500 eight,

02:00:31.680 nine,

02:00:31.840 ten.

02:00:32.180 She gone.

02:00:33.160 She gone.

02:00:33.900 She gone.

02:00:36.000 Congratulations on everything,

02:00:37.180 dude.

02:00:37.240 Thank you,

02:00:37.580 girl.

02:00:37.840 Yeah,

02:00:38.240 I feel fortunate that we've gotten to,

02:00:39.900 have to be able to work in the same field together.

02:00:42.440 Yeah,

02:00:42.820 me too,

02:00:43.260 man.

02:00:43.460 It's been amazing,

02:00:44.340 and I want to keep seeing you

02:00:45.300 shoot up in this space. 0.93

02:00:47.360 And it'd be fun.

02:00:48.180 Well,

02:00:48.340 as long as I, 0.96

02:00:49.000 I just want to shoot over there 1.00

02:00:50.960 to bad friends 0.99

02:00:52.860 and join you guys.

02:00:53.760 Come through.

02:00:54.340 Yeah,

02:00:54.520 we want to have you come through.

02:00:56.140 And to settle it all,

02:00:57.200 because there,

02:00:57.620 you know,

02:00:59.060 Bobby,

02:00:59.560 if there was,

02:01:00.560 there was a chance I was going to be the bad friend.

02:01:03.180 I heard,

02:01:03.840 yeah,

02:01:04.020 to the grapevine.

02:01:05.220 And Bobby,

02:01:06.280 you know,

02:01:08.500 I know he's not here,

02:01:09.240 you know,

02:01:09.740 he,

02:01:10.240 I'm not going to say he led me on or whatever,

02:01:11.600 but I'll just.

02:01:12.220 He does lead everybody on.

02:01:13.240 Does he?

02:01:13.700 Yeah,

02:01:14.100 he's,

02:01:14.420 yeah.

02:01:15.060 Well.

02:01:15.260 Which is ironic,

02:01:16.140 because he's a follower,

02:01:16.980 not a leader.

02:01:17.900 He leads people on,

02:01:18.860 but he's much of a follower.

02:01:20.140 Well,

02:01:20.700 he led the right guy in you guys' choice,

02:01:22.960 man.

02:01:23.100 I love you.

02:01:23.560 I appreciate you.

02:01:24.060 Love you too.

02:01:24.440 Thanks,

02:01:24.680 Andrew.

02:01:24.920 Thank you,

02:01:25.280 man.

02:01:25.360 Now I'm just floating on the breeze,

02:01:28.060 and I feel I'm falling like these leaves.

02:01:31.020 I must be cornerstone.

02:01:36.240 Oh,

02:01:37.060 but when I reach that ground,

02:01:38.960 I'll share this peace of mind I found.

02:01:41.780 I can feel it in my bones.

02:01:45.260 But it's gonna tell you.

This Past Weekend with Theo Von - July 16, 2024

E517 Andrew Santino

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