This Past Weekend with Theo Von - Sebastian Maniscalco 2 ｜ This Past Weekend #223

00:00:00.000 I plan on doing more. Actually, I'm doing a movie coming up in a couple weeks called Spinning Gold,

00:00:04.640 where I play Giorgio Moroder, who was the father of disco, and I have to do it.

00:00:10.940 Talk about putting yourself in a situation that you don't normally find yourself in.

00:00:16.240 You've seen a disco?

00:00:17.400 No, that I could do.

00:00:30.000 So, I came here, right?

00:00:44.280 No.

00:00:45.080 Yeah, I just got it.

00:00:46.360 Yeah, you did. Yeah, yeah, now.

00:00:47.900 So.

00:00:48.640 Yeah, you win this round.

00:00:51.800 I notice, and this is probably the Italian in me.

00:00:54.920 Uh-huh.

00:00:55.180 But I don't like that you got your name outside on the wall.

00:01:02.000 Yeah.

00:01:02.480 I think it should be nondescript.

00:01:04.860 Yeah.

00:01:05.480 Don't you think?

00:01:06.180 Oh, because it, yeah, kind of.

00:01:07.340 Some psychotic come by, and then, oh, this is where your podcast's out of.

00:01:10.940 Yeah.

00:01:11.060 You know, kind of like a little under the radar.

00:01:13.480 No, that's a good idea, actually, I think, also, because there's a lot of mental health in this building. 0.96

00:01:17.100 So, it's like, yeah, I think they're all going to, you know, one of those freaking brain hamsters relapses, 0.79

00:01:24.540 and next thing you know, they come nibbling through the door, you know, the first guy they go after. 0.88

00:01:30.880 Yeah, no.

00:01:31.720 But, yeah, that's the Italian in you, man.

00:01:33.640 Right?

00:01:34.080 You guys do hide-and-go-seek, like, every day.

00:01:36.220 It's, like, almost 24 hours a day.

00:01:37.980 That's right.

00:01:38.720 No one ever knows where we're at, you know?

00:01:41.100 Yeah, no one knows who's hiding.

00:01:41.580 You've got a sign out there.

00:01:42.900 Might as well be a neon.

00:01:45.320 So, yeah, but this is a nice spot you got here, and I like the mural, and we were talking about this before,

00:01:51.020 that, and I know I'm not a big, I'm not in the podcast mafia, but I do have a podcast.

00:01:57.960 Yeah.

00:01:58.100 It's been, been...

00:02:00.100 With Pete Correale.

00:02:01.040 Yeah, for five years.

00:02:02.420 It's, it's really popular.

00:02:08.260 Popular enough not to make the wall, so...

00:02:11.020 Do you, do you sometimes, does it feel like that podcasting is like, what does podcasting feel like to you?

00:02:18.460 It must, does it feel a little, like, goofy, kind of, or something?

00:02:22.720 Because you're, I mean, you're really, like, an entertainer.

00:02:24.960 So, does podcasting feel, like, a little bit, you know, like, ah, it's not really my bag sometimes?

00:02:31.820 Or do you have any thoughts like that on it?

00:02:33.340 Well, you know, I like it, and I like doing podcasts not as often as maybe a lot of you guys.

00:02:40.860 I know it's like, there's a lot of you guys that are in your, you know, like, the Schwabs, the, the Callens, the Kreischers, the Seguras, and Rogan.

00:02:49.580 It's like, you know, it's like a little family you guys got, which is cool.

00:02:52.680 And you guys go on each other's podcasts and what have you.

00:02:55.940 But my podcast is not really guest-driven.

00:02:59.700 It's just two guys kind of talking about their personal and private lives, which...

00:03:04.860 Is that a no-no in the podcast world?

00:03:08.820 It reminded me.

00:03:09.520 No, no, no.

00:03:09.880 That's a yes, I think.

00:03:12.600 I got to listen to more episodes.

00:03:13.860 What's it called?

00:03:14.640 It's called The Pete and Sebastian Show.

00:03:17.180 And we get on for an hour a week.

00:03:20.760 And it started about five and a half, six years ago.

00:03:23.540 Pete lived here in Los Angeles and then subsequently moved out to Fredonia, New York.

00:03:29.120 And we do the podcast through SiriusXM.

00:03:32.880 And it's only an audio podcast.

00:03:36.460 It's not a video.

00:03:37.660 And we have fun with it.

00:03:39.260 But, you know, guys like yourself have really, really had an abundant of success doing the podcasting.

00:03:45.880 And it's great.

00:03:46.860 It's a great way, you know, for, you know...

00:03:49.660 For what, us underlings?

00:03:53.340 Look, the Italian Steve Martin over here has come down from the...

00:03:58.700 You know?

00:03:59.460 Steve Martin has come down from the...

00:04:01.880 Steve Martino.

00:04:02.820 No, I'm joking.

00:04:03.580 No, no.

00:04:04.300 No, it has been.

00:04:04.920 It's a unique...

00:04:05.360 It's almost like a family.

00:04:06.120 It is almost like a little bit of a family.

00:04:07.640 And it's been... 1.00

00:04:09.120 Dude, this shit's blown my mind. 0.99

00:04:10.340 I didn't know podcasting was gonna... 1.00

00:04:12.140 I remember...

00:04:13.680 Because I did a podcast for a couple years, for like a year called Allegedly, and it didn't do anything.

00:04:17.760 Or two years.

00:04:19.000 We had like celebrity guests.

00:04:20.480 And I didn't really like it.

00:04:22.980 So what was your tipping point?

00:04:26.200 Where did you take off on this?

00:04:27.520 Well, I went on Rogan's one time.

00:04:29.740 And I was just like, man, people just want to hear people talk about stuff.

00:04:36.020 And it kind of gave me just a different perception of what podcasting was.

00:04:39.580 And so then...

00:04:40.800 Yeah, then I just started in my kitchen.

00:04:42.540 And it was just kind of like, yeah, I'm just gonna talk about stuff that's going on.

00:04:46.180 You know?

00:04:46.440 And sometimes it struggles.

00:04:47.380 Sometimes it's not.

00:04:48.480 I can imagine yours probably has more recipes in it.

00:04:50.820 I could see that.

00:04:51.260 There's a recipe or two.

00:04:53.180 There's a lot of recipes, actually.

00:04:55.560 But yeah, we have fun with it.

00:04:57.200 It's a really, really good podcast.

00:04:59.800 It's just, I wish it would reach a broader audience.

00:05:03.180 We don't really put a lot of time and energy into it.

00:05:06.240 Because, you know, it's just, he's there.

00:05:08.640 I'm here.

00:05:09.460 Right.

00:05:10.780 So...

00:05:11.140 And you got a big life going on now.

00:05:12.700 Well, yeah.

00:05:13.040 I mean, I have a family and whatnot.

00:05:14.900 Not that there's an excuse not to have a podcast, but...

00:05:17.420 Oh, dude, I hope my father one day leaves me for a podcast.

00:05:22.300 Imagine how sad the stories are going to be for our children.

00:05:25.800 Yeah, my dad was never home.

00:05:27.200 He was an Encino recording.

00:05:32.660 He never took me to ballet class because he was in Podcastville.

00:05:38.920 That's going to be a lot of kids' stories, though.

00:05:42.080 It is.

00:05:42.740 It is.

00:05:43.360 No, but you do a good job, man.

00:05:44.640 I mean, you should really be proud of yourself and look at where it's taken you.

00:05:49.360 You've gotten a huge audience now on the road and here now.

00:05:53.700 And you're getting all these movie parts and whatnot.

00:05:56.180 So, you're...

00:05:58.180 This is...

00:05:59.260 You fit right in here.

00:06:00.420 It's been fun.

00:06:01.640 Yeah, it has been fun, man.

00:06:02.980 It's been...

00:06:04.040 You know, it's funny.

00:06:04.700 Like, Joey Diaz called me this morning.

00:06:06.260 What's good?

00:06:07.140 You know?

00:06:07.920 And you guys look up to him, I know.

00:06:09.920 And so, he called me this morning. 0.99

00:06:11.360 He's like, what's good, cocksucker? 1.00

00:06:12.780 You know? 0.97

00:06:13.100 So, yeah, you talk to a lot of, like, comedians off the podcast.

00:06:18.320 He calls, like, once a week.

00:06:19.520 Oh, yeah?

00:06:19.880 Yeah, he's just like that.

00:06:21.580 And he's always got, you know...

00:06:22.940 For him, everything is three things.

00:06:24.760 It's a...

00:06:26.100 It's destination, a sandwich, and something to read every time he tells you information.

00:06:30.920 He's like, dude, here's what you do.

00:06:32.880 You're in Buffalo.

00:06:33.800 You go two blocks down there.

00:06:35.160 You're going to smell a guy, right?

00:06:36.320 Don't look at him.

00:06:37.160 All right?

00:06:37.860 To the left, you're going to see a sandwich shop.

00:06:40.200 Looks like it's out of business. 0.99

00:06:41.340 You fucking go in there, right? 0.99

00:06:43.600 You order a Reuben. 1.00

00:06:45.740 Ask for four extra inches of meat. 1.00

00:06:47.880 Crack open a copy of Catcher in the Rye, and you're fucking tremendous, son. 0.99

00:06:52.260 Every time, no matter where you are. 0.99

00:06:53.920 He's like, oh, you're in Tampa. 0.97

00:06:54.980 Go until you can't fucking see anything, right? 0.98

00:06:57.120 Turn around three times. 0.99

00:06:58.520 There's going to be a lady there with a fucking, you know, a couple of loose veal, you know? 1.00

00:07:03.840 You grab one of those bitches, man. 1.00

00:07:06.340 You know, you open a copy of Time magazine from 1979. 1.00

00:07:10.200 Oh, nobody can fuck with you. 1.00

00:07:12.320 He always has like boom, boom, boom. 1.00

00:07:14.500 Specifics.

00:07:15.020 Yeah, very specific, no matter where you are.

00:07:19.160 But he just did a Sopranos movie.

00:07:21.920 Yeah, that's what he was telling me at the Comedy Store.

00:07:23.520 I talked to him a couple of weeks ago.

00:07:24.520 He said he just got off the Sopranos thing.

00:07:27.120 And you have a new, you have a movie.

00:07:29.380 Yeah, a movie coming out called The Irishman with De Niro, Pacino, and Pesci.

00:07:33.900 It's a gangster film.

00:07:34.700 Hold on, say their names again, bro.

00:07:36.080 And let's say them, let's say them like we, like us underlings can still say them, okay?

00:07:42.120 So who De Niro?

00:07:43.160 Larry De Niro?

00:07:43.820 Larry De Niro, Pete Pesci, and Frank Scorsese.

00:07:49.380 Who's Pete Pesci, bro? 0.84

00:07:51.220 You know he's out there pretending he's a thug.

00:07:53.800 Like, hey, like I have a brother. 0.93

00:07:57.060 Wow, man.

00:07:57.560 So yeah, it's coming out.

00:07:58.520 We don't know when, but sometime this year.

00:08:01.060 But the trailer dropped a couple weeks ago, and I was really excited about it.

00:08:05.060 It was the first time I really saw any footage from the movie, and I got goosebumps.

00:08:11.920 It's going to be pretty special. 0.98

00:08:13.340 Damn. 0.98

00:08:13.740 So I play crazy Joe Gallo, and I'm actually in the trailer falling out of the window. 0.99

00:08:20.820 So it's exciting.

00:08:23.600 We're looking forward to it.

00:08:24.480 That's crazy, man.

00:08:26.060 And I saw the Green Book that you did.

00:08:28.200 Yeah, Green Book won the Oscar this year, and yeah, very fortunate to land some of these

00:08:32.480 roles that, you know, are like dream roles for, you know, like a lot of actors who work

00:08:37.260 25 years to get in movies like this, and the comedy has allowed me to, you know, open

00:08:41.660 the doors for other opportunity, and the Green Book was one of those where, you know, I'm

00:08:46.080 working the first day with Viggo Mortensen, and, you know, he slapped me in the scene,

00:08:53.040 and then after they yelled, cut.

00:08:54.680 Yeah, it was a nice little slap.

00:08:56.080 And he goes, is that okay?

00:08:58.700 Can I do that?

00:08:59.440 And I'm like, hey, you want to lay me out?

00:09:01.420 Lay me out.

00:09:02.940 You know, I'm up for anything.

00:09:05.840 So yeah, it was exciting.

00:09:07.520 So there's exciting things going on.

00:09:08.840 I got a little baby boy that we just had eight weeks ago, so building the family.

00:09:13.960 Is it hard to concept?

00:09:14.880 Is it hard to like, does it almost feel like hard to be present sometimes?

00:09:17.720 I mean, it's a lot going on in your life.

00:09:19.960 Yeah, there's a lot of thinking.

00:09:21.880 There's a lot of, you know, sometimes I'm not in whatever I'm in.

00:09:25.660 And I might be thinking about other things, which I like to be present and available.

00:09:31.040 But sometimes your plate is really full, and it's just hard not to think about what's going on.

00:09:37.460 I worry a lot, a lot of fear in taking some of the projects I take.

00:09:43.000 Really?

00:09:43.180 Because, yeah, well, I'm doing this VMAs in two weeks, right?

00:09:46.380 I'm hosting a VMAs.

00:09:46.700 Oh, yeah, I heard about that. 0.99

00:09:47.740 And honestly, my first thought was like, what the fuck, dude? 1.00

00:09:49.940 That's crazy. 0.99

00:09:51.120 Well, it's a challenge for me because, A, it's not my audience.

00:09:55.220 I mean, skews younger.

00:09:57.500 Yeah.

00:09:57.920 My audience is typically, you know, 30 to 60.

00:10:02.300 You have jag-offs, dude.

00:10:03.620 You know what I'm saying, bro?

00:10:04.600 Jag-offs with cufflinks.

00:10:06.160 I know who your audience is.

00:10:07.560 It's getting hot in Popcastville, bro.

00:10:10.720 It's getting hot.

00:10:11.580 I'm joking, man.

00:10:12.380 You have a huge audience that gets good entertainment, so that's who you have.

00:10:17.340 Yeah.

00:10:18.320 So you're worried that?

00:10:19.960 Well, I mean, it's first of all, I mean, you all know as a comedian when you do comedy at a musical event,

00:10:29.280 that, you know, sometimes it could be difficult to connect with the crowd just because, you know,

00:10:35.380 they're listening to music and then you come on and you have to kind of segue in, do a joke here or there.

00:10:40.920 So it's something.

00:10:42.080 But you're hosting it, right?

00:10:42.340 Yeah, I'm hosting it.

00:10:43.340 So I'm. 0.64

00:10:44.080 Crazy.

00:10:44.760 Now, you never saw, you never would have thought that you'd be hosting the VMS.

00:10:48.280 No, it wasn't on my vision board.

00:10:50.480 Like, yeah, dude, yeah.

00:10:52.660 So do you have a vision board?

00:10:54.460 Bro, that's crazy. 1.00

00:10:55.060 Do you write shit down? 1.00

00:10:56.060 I do have a vision board, actually, and I want a black son one day. 1.00

00:10:58.800 I have two black kids on my vision board.

00:11:00.460 You got two black kids? 0.99

00:11:02.120 Yeah.

00:11:02.340 So people always, I don't tell people that often because they don't see it the way I see it, you know?

00:11:06.960 How do you see it?

00:11:08.060 I see it as these are going to be my son.

00:11:09.660 These are going to be my sons one day.

00:11:11.040 And I think other people see like, oh, a guy from the south has a couple of black guys on a vision board.

00:11:15.180 You know, I think they kind of get a, you know, they're looking at it different.

00:11:18.240 So if I went to your house and looked at the vision board, you got two black kids up there? 0.99

00:11:22.360 Yeah. 0.75

00:11:22.740 Yeah, I do.

00:11:23.580 Look, they're happy.

00:11:25.120 And one of them has a school book under his arm.

00:11:27.760 Those are my sons, man.

00:11:29.420 Okay.

00:11:29.780 And no matter who my sons are or what, you know, what color, you know, what tent they

00:11:34.400 come in, they're going to be, you know, hopefully they're going to be reading decently and doing

00:11:38.180 good stuff, you know?

00:11:39.160 But dude, that's crazy.

00:11:42.380 You're going to be hosting the VMAs.

00:11:43.360 You have to be a little nervous, huh?

00:11:45.280 I'm a lot nervous.

00:11:46.560 I wouldn't be living if I'm not really feeling this stuff.

00:11:49.500 So, you know, the music skewing younger, uh, never hosted anything before.

00:11:56.820 Um, but, you know, like, you know, you got to write the comedy for the night, you know?

00:12:04.280 And my comedy generally is tested at the comedy store and whatnot.

00:12:09.060 So the monologue that I'm opening up with, you know, I, I've been working on, but haven't

00:12:15.020 really tested it in front of a live audience, um, which I will, you know, moving forward

00:12:20.280 this week and next, but yeah, it's a, it's, it's a daunting task, but are you, so you're

00:12:25.540 going to talk about celebrities and stuff and you have to kind of, I mean, MTV's turned

00:12:28.560 it, it's basically just Rob Dyrdek 24 hours a day. 0.86

00:12:30.740 I think I feel like it's just that show ridiculousness.

00:12:33.020 Yeah.

00:12:33.360 There's a lot of that, but I'm not, my style's not ripping people to shreds.

00:12:37.340 My style's a little bit more.

00:12:38.640 I'm going to tailor the comedy to what I, what I do on stage and kind of fit it into the environment

00:12:44.880 rather than, uh, go on stage and go, well, Drake's here tonight.

00:12:49.560 I don't, it's not really what I do, what I do.

00:12:52.800 So.

00:12:53.280 Right.

00:12:53.660 Oh, wow.

00:12:54.000 That's cool though.

00:12:54.540 Cause that, that's, I think when I heard about it, I was like, oh man, is Sebastian going

00:12:58.400 to do that?

00:12:58.740 It's just different.

00:12:59.440 It's just different than him.

00:13:00.660 That would just, to me, it would seem so scary.

00:13:03.360 You know, it's frightening, but, but it's good.

00:13:06.940 It's a good frightening.

00:13:07.720 You know, like I believe that if you don't challenge yourself in this business and we've

00:13:10.960 talked to offline about this, like, you know, getting a little, um, maybe your momentum

00:13:16.140 is not there or your passion is not there.

00:13:18.660 Maybe in certain different things, I feel that, you know, the challenge is where you kind of

00:13:23.120 get the passion back and, or putting yourself in situations that you typically wouldn't put

00:13:27.800 yourself in to, uh, you know, overcome and succeed.

00:13:31.400 So, you know, doing that, yeah, doing one, this is definitely one of those.

00:13:37.040 That's wild.

00:13:38.720 So, yeah, it's been good though.

00:13:40.220 We're going to wear a dude. 0.57

00:13:41.420 How?

00:13:42.000 Like, I am getting up the outfits are, uh, next, next, next week.

00:13:48.400 I mean, I'm not going to come out there in a see-through leopard nipple shirt, but how

00:13:53.320 many gross of sequins are in the mail right now headed to Los Angeles to make your costume,

00:14:00.400 brother?

00:14:00.960 There might be a sequined jacket or two, but, uh. 0.99

00:14:05.220 Bro, you better fucking come out looking like a 60-year-old Italian doc who's trying 0.99

00:14:11.540 to fucking get one last run at some cock over at the VFW, you know? 1.00

00:14:15.460 I want a real, I want you to come out just shining, bro. 0.99

00:14:19.640 There's going to be a lot of, yeah, I think I'm the, maybe one of the oldest hosts they've

00:14:24.280 ever had.

00:14:24.920 At least the, maybe the only host they've ever had with gray hair.

00:14:29.080 Oh, that's good.

00:14:30.000 Definitely.

00:14:31.220 So, um.

00:14:31.860 And you might be one of the only hosts who's being honest about their age as well.

00:14:35.260 Yeah.

00:14:35.580 So, who knows?

00:14:36.840 46 years old. 1.00

00:14:38.440 Damn. 1.00

00:14:38.840 Doing the, uh, the VMAs. 0.99

00:14:40.500 So, yeah, that's, uh, that's going to be exciting. 0.99

00:14:43.040 Damn, bro. 0.99

00:14:43.580 That's so crazy, man. 1.00

00:14:44.540 It's crazy.

00:14:45.140 Is it, is it strange to feel sometimes that that's your life?

00:14:47.600 Like, isn't it sometimes, um, even with me just like in the past year, just getting things,

00:14:52.480 getting busier and people coming out.

00:14:53.840 It's like, it's crazy how quick you adapt to it, kind of.

00:14:56.700 And then, uh, sometimes I don't feel embarrassed that it's my life or something.

00:15:00.920 I mean, I'm grateful, but I just feel, it's almost like my life, the reality of some of

00:15:05.560 my life sometimes makes me a little bit nervous, if that makes any sense.

00:15:08.620 What are you nervous about?

00:15:09.500 So, just like, um, I guess just like, there's a, there's, it feels like there's a bigger

00:15:14.720 expectation than you're able to fulfill just as like a human person, you know?

00:15:18.400 It's almost like, um, you get bigger than you are as a person in some, or I worry, I fear

00:15:26.820 of some of that or something.

00:15:28.060 I don't know if that makes any sense or not, you know?

00:15:30.200 Yeah, I mean, I guess in a way, I mean, for myself, yeah, I just, you know, I just like

00:15:36.680 to live a normal life.

00:15:38.060 I don't like to like, feel like I have to be doing something else.

00:15:42.800 Put it this way.

00:15:44.580 Um, the gym I work out at, I don't have an office, right?

00:15:48.760 I just have, uh, a home and I work out of the home, right?

00:15:53.640 But it's getting a little crazy now at the house.

00:15:56.340 With two children.

00:15:56.920 With two kids.

00:15:57.420 It's hard to work.

00:15:58.200 It's hard to do anything.

00:15:59.520 So what I've been doing is going to my gym.

00:16:03.480 And after I work out, I set up shop.

00:16:07.460 At the gym?

00:16:08.520 At the gym.

00:16:09.260 Oh, Jesus.

00:16:10.780 Which I've done.

00:16:11.540 I've seen those guys.

00:16:12.440 Which I've done.

00:16:14.120 I've, I've, I've gone to Starbucks.

00:16:15.600 I've gone, you know, I've done all that stuff, you know, throughout my whole career.

00:16:21.260 I've always kind of like just set up shop and, and, and did things.

00:16:24.960 So.

00:16:25.000 And what do you, you bring in a laptop or you bring in like a laptop?

00:16:27.220 Okay, you're not bringing in a printer.

00:16:28.360 No, I'm not bringing in a printer.

00:16:29.640 Okay.

00:16:30.080 Okay.

00:16:30.560 But, uh, I just, just, you know, catch up on some emails on a table outside the gym, right?

00:16:37.640 I could just see you carrying a monitor in there.

00:16:39.600 Yeah, no, no, no.

00:16:40.460 Or they used to have a guy at Coffee Bean would bring a monitor in.

00:16:43.340 Yeah, I've seen those guys.

00:16:44.240 They used to have a stack at Tower, that whole thing.

00:16:46.000 It was insane.

00:16:47.000 It's the same guy that's editing a full movie at Apple Store.

00:16:52.200 You ever see those guys?

00:16:53.000 You walk in, this guy's doing like, he's on Final Cut doing a, doing his, uh, short film.

00:16:59.620 Yeah.

00:16:59.800 He's like, well, everybody quiet down.

00:17:01.460 I need some room tone. 0.91

00:17:02.880 People are like, chill the fuck out, guy.

00:17:05.980 Trying to get some AirPods, man.

00:17:07.700 Um, that's, so, so sometimes you'll just do it at the gym, huh?

00:17:12.600 Yeah.

00:17:13.000 You know, I mean, like talking about just kind of living a, a life that's kind of just normal

00:17:17.880 and don't have to feel like you have to adjust your everyday kind of routine because you've

00:17:23.940 hit some type of success.

00:17:25.340 I don't know.

00:17:25.700 I've always just trying to, you know, it's just do, because I feel like if you stop doing

00:17:30.240 the things that you normally would do, you lose the kind of like the pulse of what people

00:17:35.840 are doing with the, you know, I, I, I like going to the stores and the whole, you know,

00:17:40.120 grocery shop.

00:17:40.900 I like, I love all that stuff and I'll continue to do it.

00:17:44.280 Um, just because I, I enjoy it.

00:17:47.420 Plus I get a lot of like material from just kind of living life.

00:17:51.340 Oh yeah, man.

00:17:52.500 I think it will.

00:17:53.700 Yeah.

00:17:54.060 When you say that, I think, yeah, I think, uh, yeah, maybe my fear is like, it's not,

00:17:59.020 it's just like this, it's a, it's a uncomfortable perception.

00:18:03.280 It's like, yeah, maybe I feel like I have to be different or something when I've just,

00:18:06.680 you know, don't, maybe it's like this weird, like pressure or something.

00:18:09.960 I don't know.

00:18:10.640 Um, but yeah, I think doing regular stuff, like I like sometimes taking a bird scooter

00:18:16.560 to the gym in the morning, you know, and I don't have nice calves and I have shorts on. 0.96

00:18:20.840 So for me, it's really humbling, you know, bro, taking fucking lean calves out for a spin 0.98

00:18:26.120 on a bird scooter at 39 years old. 0.98

00:18:28.280 Have you, have you felt at all safe on that thing?

00:18:36.340 I did it once or twice and it, it just, the, you know, the one bump and it's over, right?

00:18:42.260 Yeah.

00:18:42.660 There's not a lot of, um, there's not a lot of opportunity for safety.

00:18:46.740 I don't feel like on them overall.

00:18:48.400 Dude, one lady hit the dirt, bro. 1.00

00:18:50.460 Everybody sprouts over by me, right? 0.99

00:18:52.320 Like this lady fucking way too old to be on one, had a bag of groceries, just hit the 1.00

00:18:58.900 dirt, bro. 1.00

00:18:59.360 And just didn't move at all. 0.92

00:19:00.500 Right. 0.99

00:19:00.940 Instead of helping, there was like two people yelling, this bitch is down over here. 1.00

00:19:06.040 Right. 0.98

00:19:06.580 And I was like, Oh my God.

00:19:08.820 Yeah. 0.92

00:19:09.180 I at least haunt my horn real loud as I fucking drove off, you know, but she, but she bit it, 1.00

00:19:14.100 man. 0.98

00:19:14.380 Groceries all over.

00:19:15.420 Or like, um, yeah, it's a lot of, well, listen, these birds, you know, it's, it's, it's good

00:19:20.860 for, you want to go to the gym, you want to go to a buddy's house, fine.

00:19:24.220 You pick one up, you go.

00:19:25.420 But what I've seen on these birds is like you were saying, people are carrying groceries.

00:19:31.580 Then I saw a guy that apparently the, you take a bird and you, you go and charge it.

00:19:37.540 Right.

00:19:37.840 And then people make money.

00:19:38.840 The guy was on a bird with two birds on his shoulder.

00:19:44.740 Okay.

00:19:46.720 It's just, it's not made for that.

00:19:48.620 You know what I'm saying?

00:19:49.480 That's flocking, bro.

00:19:50.480 That's crazy, dude.

00:19:52.360 When you flocking, man, that's wild.

00:19:54.260 Flocking the birds.

00:19:55.540 That's crazy.

00:19:57.140 Yeah. 0.99

00:19:57.400 Sometimes you'll see some guy at night just throwing them all into a fucking van, you know? 0.99

00:20:01.920 And this is one of your moves, bro. 1.00

00:20:03.800 Stolen from your rat. 0.98

00:20:05.940 He's ain't that old. 0.98

00:20:06.760 You got a new son, man.

00:20:10.960 That's awesome, huh?

00:20:11.860 Yeah.

00:20:12.260 So I got a little baby boy and yeah, it's been just, it's been great.

00:20:17.020 Got two and a half year old daughter and a lot, a lot of stuff going on at the house.

00:20:21.800 And I try when I'm home to spend as much time as I can with my kids, whether it's taking my

00:20:27.980 daughter to the ballet or whatnot.

00:20:30.220 Again, just kind of living, living the dad life and extracting material from, from those

00:20:35.840 moments as well.

00:20:36.820 So yeah, it's been really, really, it's really, it's a lot of, it's a lot of work, but it's

00:20:42.640 very rewarding bringing up kids.

00:20:44.540 And having a son too.

00:20:45.640 And I know in your kind of bloodline, it's a big thing, right?

00:20:48.640 Well, yeah.

00:20:48.980 Being an Italian family, it's nice to have a son, carry on the name.

00:20:52.420 The name is a big thing.

00:20:53.000 You're rolling with three daughters.

00:20:53.580 Because people are like, hey, where'd the name go?

00:20:57.320 What's going on here?

00:20:59.260 So yeah, we had my father and my mother were extremely excited when the little baby, baby

00:21:04.400 boy came.

00:21:05.460 So yeah, I think we're done.

00:21:06.820 I think we're, we're done.

00:21:08.100 Two is good enough.

00:21:09.880 Y'all getting the tubes tied or anything?

00:21:11.080 What do you guys do, dude?

00:21:12.060 I don't know, man. 0.99

00:21:13.060 Get the tubes, fucking somebody sneak up on a tube with a fucking shank? 1.00

00:21:15.440 Yeah, we, we, we shank it, we shank a tube. 1.00

00:21:19.960 Yeah.

00:21:21.580 I don't know.

00:21:22.200 I don't know what I'm going to do yet.

00:21:23.140 We haven't really discussed, it has been discussed, but I have no idea what's going

00:21:27.380 on.

00:21:27.860 It's the least of my worries right now.

00:21:29.220 Right.

00:21:30.980 So we haven't even talked about the shirt.

00:21:33.280 I think.

00:21:33.940 Oh, I wore this shirt just for you, man.

00:21:35.220 It's a beautiful piece.

00:21:37.000 It's a beautiful garment.

00:21:38.380 Well, I remember you said that, yeah, if you ever had a different job, it would be like

00:21:41.440 a concierge or something.

00:21:43.180 That's right.

00:21:43.460 So I could just see you, like, I'll tell you this, if you show up in people's dreams

00:21:47.580 or anything, this is what you're wearing.

00:21:49.220 This is what they're wearing.

00:21:50.220 This is what I'm wearing.

00:21:51.560 Yeah, definitely, bro. 1.00

00:21:53.860 You're the guy who fucking shows up. 0.99

00:21:55.700 That's it, man. 1.00

00:21:56.160 That is a beautiful maitre d' outfit.

00:21:58.440 Oh, yeah.

00:21:58.920 It's top notch, dude.

00:22:00.460 Go to prom, funeral, all of it.

00:22:02.700 That's one thing that is nice about Italians, like, if they really, they dress up, you almost 1.00

00:22:05.880 dress for anything.

00:22:07.380 It could be something severe.

00:22:08.500 It could be a good, you know, it could be a get together.

00:22:11.060 It could be a funeral.

00:22:11.860 It could be a indictment, you know?

00:22:15.960 All of the above.

00:22:17.720 Yeah, it's like they dress for, they're well-dressed.

00:22:20.240 Well, I won best dressed in high school.

00:22:22.160 You really?

00:22:22.580 Yeah.

00:22:23.040 Senior year, I took, well, I actually got, there was a tie between me and another guy.

00:22:27.620 I should have, I should have took it home, though.

00:22:29.580 But I was actually upset that I had to share the award with the guy.

00:22:33.660 But yeah, always, always very particular about how we look.

00:22:38.740 And I think it stemmed from, you know, the upbringing.

00:22:41.100 I would come down to go out.

00:22:43.200 My mother's like, where are you going with that on? 0.67

00:22:45.040 And I'm like, well, we're going to go to dinner.

00:22:47.020 She's like, go put, you know, go put some nice slacks on. 1.00

00:22:50.720 You're like, dude, ma, we're going to Arby's, ma.

00:22:53.760 Yeah, we don't go to Arby's.

00:22:54.560 No.

00:22:55.380 No.

00:22:55.780 That's true.

00:22:56.540 We're going to Pizza Hut.

00:22:57.360 Remember when Pizza Hut was sit down?

00:22:59.240 They're not sit down anymore?

00:23:00.420 No.

00:23:01.100 I don't know.

00:23:01.460 Merge with Baskin-Robbins, dude. 1.00

00:23:02.980 Fucking. 1.00

00:23:03.780 Bro, some of them, you go in there, it's just some Muppet just gives you a scoop of fucking 1.00

00:23:07.480 pepperoni, bro. 0.99

00:23:09.320 And somebody pulls a gun in the distance, bro.

00:23:11.700 That place is going downhill.

00:23:13.980 You can't sit down and eat there anymore?

00:23:15.520 You can, bro. 0.98

00:23:17.300 You can, but you're not going to be fucking looked at well. 0.98

00:23:20.340 It's very small in there. 0.98

00:23:22.260 No, Pizza Hut used to be like a restaurant.

00:23:24.320 Oh, my God.

00:23:24.880 Right?

00:23:25.480 Dude, it was so nice.

00:23:27.380 Yeah.

00:23:27.740 Have you been in a Pizza Hut recently?

00:23:29.980 Yeah, I picked up from them.

00:23:30.940 I don't think you can sit.

00:23:31.720 There's like a bench where you can wait, but if you sit there and eat, it's going to be

00:23:34.540 hella awkward for me.

00:23:35.300 Okay.

00:23:36.140 But it's, yeah, it's merged with Baskin-Robbins, and it's just, Pizza Hut used to be.

00:23:39.960 We were going out.

00:23:41.000 We went to Pizza Hut.

00:23:41.800 Yeah.

00:23:42.260 They had those kind of curved bench.

00:23:43.960 Oh, yeah.

00:23:44.120 The bench, you sat down, and you had a pizza.

00:23:47.240 Wow, I haven't been there in a while.

00:23:48.500 They had the, yeah, the crust was, it was a big pie.

00:23:51.620 They had a couple video games usually in the place.

00:23:53.560 Yeah.

00:23:54.000 Our family would go sit in there.

00:23:56.220 I enjoyed that.

00:23:56.900 A salad bar?

00:23:58.100 Salad bar, that's right.

00:23:59.220 They did have a salad bar.

00:24:00.420 They had pudding on it.

00:24:01.260 I never understood it, but.

00:24:02.580 Just five days ago, they shut down 500 more dine-in Pizza Hut locations.

00:24:07.520 It's going away.

00:24:08.940 That's it.

00:24:09.540 Pizza Hut's done.

00:24:12.180 Where do you eat your pizza out here?

00:24:13.460 There's a nice place called Pizana out here, if you're looking for a nice piece of pizza.

00:24:16.800 Is there?

00:24:17.220 Yeah.

00:24:17.580 Where's that at?

00:24:18.220 It's on Robertson and Melrose.

00:24:19.620 They just opened up a location.

00:24:20.840 Also in Brentwood.

00:24:21.980 I have no money and no steak in this place, but.

00:24:24.320 Okay.

00:24:24.840 If you want some pizza.

00:24:26.700 Those are nice neighborhoods, bro.

00:24:28.140 I'm eating pizza more out here in regional.

00:24:30.080 You know, I'm eating pizza more.

00:24:31.960 Are you, I don't want to tell the listeners or the viewers where we're at.

00:24:35.720 Right.

00:24:36.220 But.

00:24:36.780 Yeah, I eat pizza around here.

00:24:38.020 Okay.

00:24:38.280 This is your hood?

00:24:39.100 Like really close to where you could get gas.

00:24:40.820 You know what I'm saying?

00:24:41.580 Like that kind of thing.

00:24:43.260 You can smell one from the other place, you know?

00:24:46.520 That just bleeds in.

00:24:47.780 The gas bleeds into the cheese.

00:24:51.840 Who are you, who's somebody that you are kind of low-key excited about seeing at the VMA?

00:24:56.000 It's like just to see.

00:24:56.780 Do you already know everybody's going to be there and stuff?

00:24:58.260 Yes, they've given me a list.

00:25:03.160 Who am I excited to see?

00:25:06.220 This is why they picked me to do this, is I don't really know a lot about music.

00:25:12.540 And this is kind of what they liked about it, that I don't really have a button on what's going on with the music industry.

00:25:19.900 Although I do, I know the Khalids and From Afar and Her and Halsey and all these artists.

00:25:28.060 I know, but I don't know like the ins and outs of like who's throwing shade.

00:25:32.540 Right.

00:25:33.020 Yeah.

00:25:33.680 Whatever that means.

00:25:36.400 I don't know.

00:25:38.680 Where I'm from, that is my aunt got a new awning on their camper.

00:25:42.320 You know what I'm saying?

00:25:43.020 Like it's totally different.

00:25:45.300 But Missy Elliott, who I grew up kind of listening to, she's going to be there.

00:25:50.020 You have a similar body type too, I feel like.

00:25:51.380 Yeah, I feel like we're similar in shape.

00:25:54.280 So she's going to be there?

00:25:55.660 She's going to be there.

00:25:57.180 And yeah, there's a couple surprise guests that I can't really mention that I'm looking forward to meeting.

00:26:02.800 That's crazy, man.

00:26:04.760 What a wild night that's going to be.

00:26:06.800 My mom just told me she's coming.

00:26:08.480 My father's coming.

00:26:09.260 My in-laws are coming.

00:26:10.300 And obviously my wife, my whole family's coming, my kids.

00:26:14.000 I want to bring my kids there and get some photos with them.

00:26:16.320 Oh, yeah, that'd be cool.

00:26:17.220 At the Prudential Center where they're going to have it.

00:26:19.300 So yeah, just elaborate.

00:26:21.060 Even on a production end of it, just looking at this because I know a lot about production and putting on a show.

00:26:27.320 What they have going into this as far as the technology is just sick.

00:26:34.660 It's amazing.

00:26:36.200 And this is in New York, right?

00:26:38.160 This is in New Jersey, Prudential Center in New Jersey.

00:26:40.560 Oh, is that where they usually have it?

00:26:41.620 Or they usually have it?

00:26:42.440 Last year, I think it was at Radio City.

00:26:44.680 They've had it at Radio City.

00:26:45.920 They've had it here at the Staples Center.

00:26:47.800 They've had it.

00:26:49.420 Madison Square Garden, Microsoft Theater, The Forum, Barclays.

00:26:53.920 Because I went to one, because I did an MTV show when I was young, right?

00:26:59.040 And so we went to.

00:27:00.060 What was that, 20 years ago?

00:27:01.340 The VMAs.

00:27:01.940 Yep, 20 years ago.

00:27:02.740 So you went to the VMAs?

00:27:03.880 Went to the VMAs.

00:27:04.680 We got a ticket somehow.

00:27:05.520 I don't even know, right?

00:27:06.380 I get out at the place.

00:27:07.680 I didn't know what it was going to be like.

00:27:08.620 I mean, I'd seen it on television, but I get out, get dropped off there.

00:27:12.560 Bono is walking on the red carpet at the same time.

00:27:14.860 I think everybody's excited for me, right, dude?

00:27:17.420 Because I have no clue who Bono is.

00:27:18.980 No clue.

00:27:19.620 I never really listened to music.

00:27:20.740 I listened to Alice in Chains.

00:27:23.640 I'd recognize them are Guns N' Roses, maybe.

00:27:27.620 So people are going nuts, dude.

00:27:29.860 I have no idea.

00:27:31.260 Go into the place, sitting.

00:27:32.600 I sat behind Chris Farley's brothers.

00:27:35.480 He had just died.

00:27:36.920 And I sat behind his brothers, sat next to Susan Sarandon and Tim Robbins.

00:27:42.620 Wow.

00:27:43.480 And NSYNC performed.

00:27:45.900 At some point in the evening, bro, it was long.

00:27:47.660 I remember urinating in the bathroom between Kid Rock and Montel Williams.

00:27:52.140 Wow.

00:27:52.820 You know?

00:27:53.700 That's a good piss break. 0.99

00:27:54.760 And fucking bringing those guys together, you know? 0.99

00:27:57.880 And at one point in the evening, I fell asleep in my seat, bro. 0.99

00:28:00.820 I was just...

00:28:01.440 Wow.

00:28:01.560 I guess it was like a long night, and I just got kind of tired, and I just remember falling

00:28:04.800 asleep.

00:28:05.960 Now, did you know you were going to be...

00:28:07.220 Wanted to get into comedy back then?

00:28:09.380 No, I don't think so.

00:28:10.240 I think I just didn't want to grow up.

00:28:11.640 Like, one thing about comedy, for me, I just didn't...

00:28:13.980 You know, I didn't want to grow up.

00:28:14.940 It was like, you got to travel.

00:28:17.180 You didn't really know if your girlfriend was your girlfriend.

00:28:19.820 You know?

00:28:20.040 She didn't know, kind of, if he was the boy, you know?

00:28:22.300 Yeah.

00:28:22.880 And, yeah, it just felt like you didn't have to grow up.

00:28:25.400 Like, you could always get...

00:28:26.800 Whatever was going on, you could always go escape it for a few days by going and do

00:28:29.580 shows.

00:28:31.280 But the road rules took you out of Louisiana?

00:28:33.820 Yeah.

00:28:34.940 Yeah, it took me...

00:28:37.080 Yeah, it was good, because I got to meet...

00:28:38.420 Like, I just got to see something different.

00:28:39.960 Like, we went to South Africa on it, I remember.

00:28:41.900 Oh, wow. 0.99

00:28:42.380 And I remember being like, holy shit, you know? 0.99

00:28:45.640 All these people are alive, you know? 0.96

00:28:47.760 Like, I just never really put it together.

00:28:49.360 There was people...

00:28:49.960 Like, I'd seen a globe, but I'd never put together, like, oh, there's really people over

00:28:53.720 here, like, being alive, you know? 0.99

00:28:55.460 Then you get there, and I'm like, holy shit, man. 0.99

00:28:58.160 You know? 0.99

00:28:58.440 All these people are going to be in heaven?

00:28:59.600 Like, this is crazy.

00:29:00.800 Because when I thought of heaven, I thought kind of, you know, kind of a little bit of

00:29:04.140 a limited group, you know? 0.99

00:29:05.860 But then you get over there, and you're like, damn, everybody's going to be up in this bitch, 1.00

00:29:11.120 man. 1.00

00:29:11.820 It's a whole world out there.

00:29:13.000 Yeah, it started giving me just a...

00:29:14.080 Yeah, it gave me just a different perception.

00:29:16.180 Globe came alive.

00:29:17.120 Yeah, Globe.

00:29:18.000 Really?

00:29:18.320 Yeah.

00:29:18.820 It got four-dimensional.

00:29:19.940 So, a little bit more about the movie, then, I want to know.

00:29:25.540 So...

00:29:25.900 So, is it interesting, like, as you start to build, you kind of become a name, you know?

00:29:29.460 And so, then it's like, if you're working with guys like that, like, do you...

00:29:34.640 Is it hard to, like, not be, like...

00:29:39.500 Like, would you not want to seem like you're just, like, a regular guy with him?

00:29:44.460 Like, do you have to try and pay, like, a little bit of homage?

00:29:46.600 Like, do you feel like any of that kind of thing on set, or what is it like, kind of?

00:29:50.200 When I went on set, I told myself, I'm not going to speak unless spoken to.

00:29:56.120 Right?

00:29:56.400 I didn't want to be that guy.

00:29:58.080 Yeah.

00:29:58.400 And I'm not that guy, you know?

00:30:00.080 Jesus.

00:30:00.640 Go up to... 1.00

00:30:01.400 That fucking guy, bro. 1.00

00:30:04.240 Well, you know the guy that goes, like, what are you going to do? 1.00

00:30:06.880 Go up to Robert De Niro and go, wow, I really loved you in Casino.

00:30:12.400 Right?

00:30:12.920 Yeah, you know.

00:30:13.740 The first day, I had a scene with Robert De Niro and Joe Pesci, and I didn't know...

00:30:21.300 I didn't sleep for a couple of days before that.

00:30:23.160 I was really kind of pining over this. 1.00

00:30:25.780 You didn't sleep, dog, damn. 1.00

00:30:27.760 It was crazy. 1.00

00:30:29.460 Well, no, I mean, like... 1.00

00:30:30.280 Were you fucking camping and shit got crazy? 0.99

00:30:33.320 Like, how do you not get any rest, man? 1.00

00:30:35.340 Well, I mean, I was just...

00:30:36.260 Because I think.

00:30:37.000 I'm, like, neurotic, you know?

00:30:38.720 Like, if I got something to do, I'm like, there's VMAs, two days before that, I'm going

00:30:42.960 to be up and down, all right?

00:30:44.100 There's no sleep. 0.99

00:30:45.060 Oh, when they call you out to the stage, that's going to be fucking... 0.99

00:30:47.380 It's live. 0.99

00:30:48.540 It's live, man.

00:30:50.980 So, with this, it was nerve-wracking.

00:30:56.820 Because I just...

00:30:57.380 I'm not an experienced actor.

00:31:00.200 I don't have a lot of experience on movie sets.

00:31:03.280 And now, to be thrust into a movie where you're working with, you know, not only Martin Scorsese,

00:31:10.040 but probably two of the actors that are maybe the best of our generation, and then, you know,

00:31:15.380 they're yelling, action.

00:31:16.940 I'm just hoping words come out of my mouth, you know?

00:31:19.880 So, I was nervous going into that whole experience.

00:31:26.360 But it's just like anything else, you know?

00:31:28.680 You do it, and then you're like, okay, you know?

00:31:31.440 Because there's doubt.

00:31:32.880 There was doubt for me.

00:31:33.860 Like, do I belong here?

00:31:35.060 Right.

00:31:35.620 That's what I think I'm trying to get at a little bit.

00:31:37.640 Yeah, that's what I would feel.

00:31:39.220 I feel like, do I belong here?

00:31:40.440 Am I pretending that I belong here?

00:31:42.200 Do they know that I don't know if I belong here?

00:31:44.620 Like, those would be the things that would be running through my head, you know? 0.99

00:31:47.220 Are they looking at me like, oh, this fucking guy don't belong here? 0.98

00:31:49.780 Or are they just looking at me like a regular person, and all the doubt is just inside of me, you know? 0.99

00:31:53.580 That's what I would be looking at.

00:31:54.080 That's what it is.

00:31:56.320 It's all inside.

00:31:57.200 The questions you have.

00:31:59.680 No one else is thinking that.

00:32:01.640 You have to think that.

00:32:03.340 But, you know, that's what I was thinking.

00:32:05.020 I was like, am I going to get on set?

00:32:06.480 And De Niro's going to go, this is who we hired?

00:32:10.420 So, yeah, there is a bit of self-doubt, and there is a bit of, you know, a lot of anxiety and nerves, at least for me.

00:32:21.220 And then once we are up and running, it was off to the races.

00:32:25.000 So, I didn't really look back after that.

00:32:28.500 But I did have some experience with the Green Book going into this movie, which I think that's why.

00:32:33.460 I think a lot of things happen for a reason, you know?

00:32:35.720 Like, you get certain things because they prepare you for what's to come.

00:32:39.180 Oh, right.

00:32:39.540 A plane you can't even see, kind of.

00:32:40.800 Yeah.

00:32:41.660 With Green Book, yeah.

00:32:42.920 Did you guys shoot those scenes in order or were they out of order?

00:32:45.660 Green Book was in order.

00:32:49.480 Because, dude, honestly, this is obviously me judging you.

00:32:52.680 But from the beginning, like, the first scene when I see, like, helping with the luggage, I think, or something.

00:32:56.680 There was some scene, I think, or helping somebody to just arrive somewhere in a car, I think.

00:33:01.120 And by the end, I could personally see, like, wow, he's so much more comfortable at the Christmas party.

00:33:07.360 Okay, because the first day was the luggage day.

00:33:10.800 Wow.

00:33:11.160 And talk about nerves.

00:33:13.320 Oh, I'd be so nervous.

00:33:14.220 I was nervous for you watching it 100%.

00:33:17.140 Like, that's so scary.

00:33:18.720 But no joke, dude, by the end, I was like, oh, Sebastian, just, I mean, knowing enough about you and knowing a little bit of, like, your mannerisms and how you look even off of stage and stuff, like, I was like, oh, man, he seems a little bit nervous. 0.97

00:33:29.880 But by the end, I was like, damn, he's dialed in, man. 0.67

00:33:32.720 Yeah, no, you're right. 0.99

00:33:33.820 You're very perceptive.

00:33:35.060 The first scene for me was nerve-wracking because I was like, oh, that was really my first big scene in a movie with a big actor.

00:33:43.740 And it's like you've got to rise to those occasions because, you know, if you don't, then they're like.

00:33:50.380 Right.

00:33:51.260 But, yeah, it was, I hope, looking back at what I did in The Irishman, when I watch it, I could, because it's different when you watch a movie and then you're doing stand-up.

00:34:01.900 And stand-up is something that'll work.

00:34:04.060 Right.

00:34:04.420 We were like, okay, that didn't work.

00:34:06.420 You can say on screen, hey, you can say on the stage.

00:34:09.100 Okay, not going to use that anymore.

00:34:10.640 You can't say that in a script.

00:34:11.740 Yeah.

00:34:12.900 So, for me, as a comedian doing acting, it's a lot different because I could always make it up in stand-up.

00:34:20.340 I could do the next joke.

00:34:21.360 I go, okay, I'm going to get him with this one.

00:34:22.880 I'm going to get back.

00:34:24.200 But it was a great, I plan on doing more.

00:34:26.840 Actually, I'm doing a movie coming up in a couple weeks called Spinning Gold where I play Giorgio Moroder, who was the father of disco.

00:34:35.100 And I have to do it.

00:34:36.700 Talk about putting yourself in a situation that you don't normally find yourself in.

00:34:42.020 Have you seen a disco?

00:34:43.220 No, that I could do.

00:34:47.700 Bro, the owner of one of the loony bins in Oklahoma City was a disco dancing champion, I remember.

00:34:53.800 He was?

00:34:54.160 He used to take me in the back room and show me all his trophies, his old outfits, his unitards or whatever, bro.

00:34:59.660 In Oklahoma?

00:35:00.100 Because painters, yeah. 0.99

00:35:00.840 A lot of disco people wore those fucking onesies that a lot of painters wore. 0.99

00:35:04.540 Bro, there's nothing like a nice onesie doing a disco, man. 0.99

00:35:08.640 That guy, that guy.

00:35:09.920 Yeah, so I'm doing this with a German accent.

00:35:13.180 So I'm working with like a dialect coach to get like a German accent.

00:35:16.040 Are you serious?

00:35:17.340 Bro, bro, bro.

00:35:18.380 At some point, dog, you don't have to challenge yourself.

00:35:22.020 That's not a challenge.

00:35:23.000 That's crazy.

00:35:24.880 That's it.

00:35:25.460 I'm doing your Moroder, huh?

00:35:26.240 This is the guy.

00:35:26.820 You're going to grow a big mustache, too?

00:35:28.120 I hope they give me a mustache on set because that mustache is beautiful.

00:35:34.860 God, is that beautiful?

00:35:36.120 Dude, I sold half a handful of pubic hair to a guy one time for a Halloween mustache.

00:35:39.920 You did?

00:35:40.320 I trimmed it right off, yeah.

00:35:42.180 On a cruise ship.

00:35:44.360 True story. 0.95

00:35:45.720 We needed hair, bro, and this guy was limited, dudes, and I was fucking carrying at the time, 0.97

00:35:49.800 so I fucking trimmed him off a couple edges, and he used honey to fucking put it right up above his lips. 0.72

00:35:55.740 Your stories, and I don't know if you feel this way, guys, but your stories are so off the beaten path. 0.99

00:36:02.620 I often go, is he making this shit up? 0.99

00:36:05.820 Yeah. 1.00

00:36:06.200 Or did that really happen?

00:36:08.040 Yeah.

00:36:08.380 So that happened?

00:36:09.920 Oh, yeah.

00:36:12.040 Oh, yeah, it happened, dude.

00:36:15.420 Trading pubic hair for small money, bro.

00:36:17.600 Trading pubic hair.

00:36:18.820 I mean, I never even heard of that.

00:36:20.100 Like, when I listen to that, I go, well, that's made up, right?

00:36:22.760 But this guy's named Patricio from Brazil, actually, and I still follow him. 0.99

00:36:27.460 He fucking, he's a big Formula One racing fan, but yeah, dude, that dude danced like a motherfucker 1.00

00:36:32.440 with somebody else's fucking pubic hair above his lip. 1.00

00:36:34.580 Okay. 1.00

00:36:36.160 He's a champion, too.

00:36:37.200 This guy was also a really cool guy.

00:36:38.900 Okay, but you're on a cruise.

00:36:40.620 Yeah.

00:36:41.180 And this is a buddy of yours?

00:36:43.500 It's Halloween, yeah.

00:36:44.540 And he needs hair for his lip.

00:36:46.440 Yeah.

00:36:46.660 And you shave your pubic hair off to give to him, which he puts on with honey?

00:36:51.480 Yeah, yeah, yeah.

00:36:52.340 I trim a decent amount. 0.97

00:36:53.460 I don't even fucking shave anything, bro. 0.97

00:36:54.860 Yeah, but like, how's that thought even come into your head and go, like, bro, hold on, 0.99

00:36:58.600 let me start shaving my pubic off. 1.00

00:37:00.900 Look, I was thinking, well, I love my hair, man, you know, even though it's, I feel like

00:37:05.100 it's getting scarce some these days, and I'm in Manhattan a little, but yeah, I love my

00:37:09.300 hair, and I just knew that I didn't want to give any of that up at the time.

00:37:12.680 But I was like, I got this, you know, second batch of hair going on, bro, that, you know, 0.92

00:37:19.320 it ain't, I don't know if it's the A team, but I got a fucking B team down here. 0.99

00:37:24.320 I'll sell you a fucking quarter ounce of it. 0.97

00:37:26.160 So you sold it to them? 1.00

00:37:27.160 Yep, 40 bucks on a cruise ship.

00:37:29.400 And a ticket for a wine, because you got tickets at night to see how much wine, and you could

00:37:32.580 get like two wines or something, you know, they had a, you know, it's kind of like a

00:37:36.880 cube or something, or, you know, like a system where you get a voucher kind of thing.

00:37:40.280 I didn't know there was a dollar amount on pubes.

00:37:44.380 There is now, bro.

00:37:45.820 Things are changing, dude.

00:37:47.440 Especially with all, what was I going to ask you about, man?

00:37:52.220 Oh, hair, dude.

00:37:53.180 So I got PRP, right?

00:37:55.240 Yeah, yeah.

00:37:55.740 Where they take part of your blood out?

00:37:57.120 Yeah.

00:37:57.640 And they like.

00:37:58.720 Well, did you get the transplant and then the PRP?

00:38:01.140 Yes.

00:38:01.380 Or did you just, okay.

00:38:02.160 I got the transplant first.

00:38:03.680 Okay.

00:38:03.960 So I got part of the back taken out and put in the front.

00:38:06.000 Yeah.

00:38:06.220 Because I love surgery, you know?

00:38:08.260 And so I got part of the back taken out, put into the front, just in the very front.

00:38:12.760 And.

00:38:13.040 How many, how many hairs do you remember?

00:38:14.640 500.

00:38:15.460 500?

00:38:16.120 Yeah.

00:38:16.540 That's not many.

00:38:17.340 That's, that's, that's, I mean, I don't really see, I mean, obviously, you know, that's a,

00:38:22.700 well, that's a nice hairline, man.

00:38:24.160 Yeah, I don't know, man.

00:38:25.000 I don't think, I mean, I don't know what the hell you were worried about.

00:38:28.500 I had it done.

00:38:29.400 Yeah.

00:38:30.080 And, because I needed it.

00:38:31.680 I mean, you look like you got a mop.

00:38:33.260 You look good, man.

00:38:33.920 You got Italian hair, bro.

00:38:34.980 Well, yeah, well, they brought it, I think I did 2,000.

00:38:38.660 Oh, nice, huh?

00:38:39.860 2,000. 1.00

00:38:40.700 Damn. 0.99

00:38:40.920 But I don't do the PRP. 1.00

00:38:42.100 I, I, I don't do that.

00:38:44.080 But you're seeing significant growth?

00:38:46.440 I don't know if I am.

00:38:47.480 That's the problem.

00:38:48.120 Here's the trick. 0.99

00:38:49.340 Who fucking knows? 0.99

00:38:50.200 No, that's what I'm saying. 0.99

00:38:51.500 Like, how do you, do you look and go, wow, this is getting thicker?

00:38:55.100 Nothing?

00:38:55.640 I mean.

00:38:56.360 Well, that was the thing.

00:38:56.960 Even with the hairs, it's like, you know, I don't know.

00:39:00.240 They say they put them in and they, they put it all the way, they cut it all the way down

00:39:04.640 to the root.

00:39:05.120 So, they're not just putting the full hair in.

00:39:06.820 They put just the little seed, right?

00:39:08.820 Is that the experience you had?

00:39:09.940 Yeah.

00:39:10.100 Well, they, yeah.

00:39:10.700 Well, they, they take it out and they, they take from the root.

00:39:14.420 Yes.

00:39:15.080 And then they plop it into your, your head.

00:39:17.740 Yeah.

00:39:17.940 Now, do you know that they could take, because I asked, I go, can you take other people's

00:39:26.460 hair and put it in your head?

00:39:28.260 And they said, no, it won't take.

00:39:29.940 Yeah.

00:39:30.160 But the second place they take it from, if you don't have any in the back is underneath

00:39:34.380 your, uh, your neck right here.

00:39:37.180 They'll take these hairs out. 1.00

00:39:38.520 Really?

00:39:38.980 Yeah.

00:39:39.500 What psycho would get that, bro? 1.00

00:39:41.880 What fucking cannibal would take out his own neck hair and get it put in the top of his 1.00

00:39:47.600 head, bro? 1.00

00:39:48.160 It's available, bro.

00:39:49.660 It's available. 0.99

00:39:50.140 Dude, what pervert is running around with his neck hair. 1.00

00:39:54.320 Hey, you got some guy with fucking pubic hair on his lip and you're worried about neck 1.00

00:39:58.860 hair? 1.00

00:39:59.300 We're all making money on the high seas, bucko.

00:40:01.820 Okay.

00:40:03.260 But dude, that's crazy. 0.87

00:40:05.620 I would just feel so fucking gentle out there. 0.88

00:40:08.360 I could, I'd be way too gentle. 0.93

00:40:10.200 I feel like that here is scary.

00:40:11.720 Neck hair.

00:40:12.900 That's too much, man.

00:40:14.320 No.

00:40:14.560 So this PRP, uh, is what, what is that? 0.69

00:40:18.820 They, they prick your head with blood.

00:40:21.720 Yeah.

00:40:22.080 Yeah.

00:40:22.240 They, so they take blood out of your arm and I had a slow drip or something.

00:40:25.760 I don't know if it was, you know, apparently it wasn't really that time of the month in 0.97

00:40:29.560 my arm, you know, because dude, it took them fucking 20 minutes. 0.97

00:40:32.680 They're both sitting there. 0.99

00:40:33.400 At one point, the guy's looking at shit on his phone, bro. 0.99

00:40:36.180 Oh God. 0.99

00:40:37.040 While he's like, they're like, well, it's good, but it's just coming out real slow, which

00:40:42.120 is way scary, bro.

00:40:44.240 Like I'm down to a half a quarter or something, you know?

00:40:47.280 So they finally got it and they put it in some machine that spins it.

00:40:50.520 And I guess gets like the best blood you have.

00:40:52.620 Yeah.

00:40:53.280 Cause people don't realize a lot of their blood is just B, you know, BC team. 1.00

00:40:57.380 There's a lot of fucking miscreants running around in there. 1.00

00:40:59.800 You know, some cells that are just sitting there's waiting for a fucking greyhound, you 1.00

00:41:03.300 know what I'm saying? 0.99

00:41:03.640 They ain't doing shit, but you got an A team in there that's really kind of doing most of 0.90

00:41:08.000 their work. 0.99

00:41:08.640 So they get those and then inject them in a certain parts back in your head.

00:41:13.880 And you, you had the process done what once a month or it's supposed to be annually.

00:41:18.680 And I just had it done annual cause it's been about a year since I had the surgery.

00:41:22.800 So I think it's been good though.

00:41:25.040 It's definitely been, it was interesting.

00:41:27.320 I thought, and I was glad I did it.

00:41:29.440 It felt me like made me feel kind of proactive.

00:41:31.300 Um, but I also get way inferior about how I look, you know?

00:41:36.080 And so it's like, you know, sometimes I do anyway, comedy's actually helped me with that

00:41:40.560 a little bit.

00:41:41.560 What?

00:41:41.740 Your, your, um, your appearance.

00:41:43.660 Yeah. 0.94

00:41:43.820 Cause it's just like, Oh, this is how I fucking look at this point.

00:41:46.240 You know, it's like, and also I think if you're too handsome, I don't know if you can 0.97

00:41:49.820 be a good comedian.

00:41:50.600 Um, you know, it would just be, it would be, I don't think a real handsome guy could

00:41:58.800 be a real comedian, a good, or it'd be harder for them to do it.

00:42:02.360 I couldn't imagine if I was like a real handsome guy, like I'm an eight if I brush my teeth,

00:42:05.880 right? 0.99

00:42:06.440 I'm a fucking eight. 0.99

00:42:07.600 You won't see me in nineville. 1.00

00:42:09.400 You fucking might see me hanging around the sevens. 0.79

00:42:11.680 Well, I mean, eight is, is pretty high up on the handsome meter. 0.97

00:42:15.780 If you, if you, right.

00:42:16.800 I don't think, I think everybody can be an eight if they take care of themselves.

00:42:19.600 I don't think eight is eight is a B, right?

00:42:23.900 Yeah.

00:42:24.140 It's a B.

00:42:24.980 It's a B.

00:42:25.560 Yeah.

00:42:25.860 So B, a B is pretty damn handsome.

00:42:27.940 I am talking, you know, C, C minus what's, that's where we're talking about comedians,

00:42:33.260 right?

00:42:33.940 Yeah.

00:42:34.160 I guess that's true.

00:42:34.860 Maybe.

00:42:37.320 Yeah.

00:42:37.680 Maybe I need to do something to myself.

00:42:41.840 Maybe you're better looking than you think you are.

00:42:45.360 No, no, man.

00:42:46.260 That's crazy. 1.00

00:42:47.080 Maybe I need to, uh, fucking. 1.00

00:42:49.600 Try and hold the door in a sharp elevator and fucking come back here a couple months 1.00

00:42:53.740 at one arm. 0.98

00:42:55.240 Um, so yeah, I don't know.

00:42:57.540 So I had it done though.

00:42:58.360 I had it done.

00:42:59.000 This guy in Beverly Hills, this guy, Dr. Cain, and he was awesome, man.

00:43:02.540 I went in there one or two times.

00:43:03.660 He's like, you don't need anything, you know, come back in a year.

00:43:06.040 He wasn't trying to upsell me on my own hair. 1.00

00:43:07.940 Like a fucking guy, you got pulling shit out of your neck. 1.00

00:43:10.580 That's crazy. 1.00

00:43:12.180 I didn't get it done.

00:43:13.860 I'm just saying that's an option.

00:43:15.140 If you want to go, go back and start taking right out of your goatee.

00:43:19.580 That's crazy, bro.

00:43:22.020 That's wild, man.

00:43:24.200 Yeah.

00:43:24.520 And it's funny.

00:43:24.940 I didn't think that I would ever be that type of person that would do that.

00:43:27.100 But then sometimes you just become people you didn't think you would be, I guess, you

00:43:30.520 know?

00:43:30.920 Yeah.

00:43:31.200 Well, you grow, you learn different things, I guess, you know?

00:43:35.420 So for you, so you got this podcast and you got one with Brennan Schaub.

00:43:42.840 How did, like, tell me in the podcast world, how does that come about?

00:43:46.860 Do you guys get together and go, yeah, we should do another?

00:43:49.260 How many of these things you got going right now?

00:43:51.340 There's a lot, right?

00:43:52.240 Yeah.

00:43:52.680 What one are we on now?

00:43:53.900 What's this?

00:43:54.600 This is the weekend, right?

00:43:56.180 Yeah, it is the weekend.

00:43:56.480 But there's another one that you have.

00:43:58.080 Yeah, King and the Sting.

00:43:59.180 Okay, but then there's another one that you just talked to the camera by yourself?

00:44:02.560 That's this past weekend, but on the Monday episode.

00:44:04.740 And so that is, just comes out on Monday.

00:44:06.920 This one comes out on Thursday.

00:44:08.080 So how many of these things you do in a week?

00:44:10.280 I'm doing three a week.

00:44:11.700 Three a week, all right.

00:44:12.920 So it's pretty, that's part of the thing that sometimes burnt me out a little bit, is

00:44:15.720 going on the road, and then, like, you know, you get in Sunday, and then have to come

00:44:19.460 here that night and do an episode, and then Tuesday do one with Brendan, Wednesday come

00:44:24.100 in here and do a guest episode.

00:44:25.860 So we're going to scale back a little bit, I think.

00:44:28.040 Not do as many.

00:44:28.620 We got Amanda Knox coming in next week. 1.00

00:44:30.460 Oh, yeah, this is your, this is.

00:44:32.660 Foxy, Knoxy, dude.

00:44:34.020 It's so funny.

00:44:34.480 I told you that the other night, and you're like, what are you going to ask her about?

00:44:38.140 And that was the first time it hit me, like, I don't know.

00:44:40.920 That's a great idea.

00:44:41.800 Well, do you, like, come into these things with, like, a prepared, like, or is it just

00:44:46.220 kind of like, we're just going to wing it?

00:44:47.760 Or, I mean, like, on the way over, are you going, are you in your head going with Amanda

00:44:52.140 Knox?

00:44:52.620 Okay, I'm going to ask her this, this.

00:44:54.020 Or do you just take your jacket off, put your hat on, and go, okay, love, we're talking?

00:44:59.760 Yeah.

00:45:00.420 Yeah, I think that's it.

00:45:01.280 I'm going to ask her.

00:45:02.840 Let me see.

00:45:04.300 I was going to ask her, like, about the media and stuff, and how much she thinks, like,

00:45:07.800 it controls everything.

00:45:08.900 Does she think that the truth even matters a lot of times?

00:45:12.020 And then.

00:45:12.920 All right, so there's some thought that's going into this.

00:45:15.180 Yeah, so there's a little bit of thought into it.

00:45:17.060 And then she has a husband now. 0.78

00:45:19.000 And then I was going to, yeah, ask her what she looks for in a man.

00:45:22.780 And if she thinks, like, you know, how many guys tried to hook up with her just because

00:45:26.060 maybe she killed somebody, or allegedly, you know. 0.94

00:45:28.980 And then, what else?

00:45:30.260 That's probably about it.

00:45:32.560 Sorry to interrupt the episode here with the host of the VMAs.

00:45:37.380 That's so crazy, bro.

00:45:38.480 I can't even believe that.

00:45:39.660 But I got to let you know that if you don't have a skill, then what are you doing?

00:45:43.780 Think about somebody that doesn't have a skill.

00:45:45.580 Hitchhiker.

00:45:46.480 You know, someone that's missing.

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00:47:58.880 Amazon, Sephora, Best Buy, Nordstrom, and more.

00:48:02.740 I just shop like normal.

00:48:04.200 Honey handles the rest.

00:48:05.300 If you're thinking you're going to have to go to a million sites and look how much is

00:48:08.740 this guitar, you know, how much is this, um, you know, this hermit crab sanctuary, whatever,

00:48:16.520 dude, Honey does all the hard work. 1.00

00:48:19.360 And how do you feel when Honey saves you money?

00:48:21.880 You feel tight.

00:48:22.900 You feel great.

00:48:24.040 Look, there's no real reason not to use Honey.

00:48:26.620 It's free to use and easy to install on your computer in just two clicks.

00:48:31.060 So shop with confidence like I do.

00:48:33.800 I'm confident when I'm shopping.

00:48:35.940 Get Honey for free at joinhoney.com slash Theo.

00:48:40.920 That's J-O-I-N-H-O-N-E-Y dot com slash T-H-E-O. 1.00

00:48:47.540 It's very simple and it's very effective.

00:48:50.300 Don't get to the checkout right before you click buy, wonder, oh, should I go see where

00:48:56.160 Consumer Reports tells me to go or wear this or wear that, Honey does all the work. 1.00

00:49:01.820 Go to joinhoney.com slash Theo, the smart shopping assistant that saves you time and money when

00:49:09.140 you're shopping online.

00:49:11.000 And now back to this movie star comedian.

00:49:15.000 Wow.

00:49:15.780 Well, we got some user questions that come in.

00:49:17.300 We'll get to one of those right now.

00:49:18.840 What up, Theo?

00:49:19.620 What up, Sebastian?

00:49:20.840 This is Steven from Connecticut.

00:49:22.200 My question is, so I know Sebastian's been on Comedians in Cars Getting Coffee two times

00:49:30.360 now, and it's ridden in some various vehicles.

00:49:34.000 Those scooters were definitely interesting.

00:49:36.920 My question is, Sebastian, if Theo was to ride in a car with Jerry Seinfeld, what car should

00:49:45.360 Jerry pick him up in?

00:49:46.840 Gang, gang.

00:49:47.500 Gang, bro.

00:49:47.920 For you, I'm seeing like a older, I'm seeing a Monte Carlo.

00:49:59.640 Oh, good.

00:50:00.240 I was an older man.

00:50:03.200 Okay.

00:50:04.160 What is a Monte Carlo?

00:50:04.900 Will you pull that up next?

00:50:05.860 Like maybe a 1981 Monte Carlo with T-tops.

00:50:11.380 Yeah.

00:50:12.120 I like T-tops.

00:50:12.560 Maybe with red interior.

00:50:14.660 Yeah.

00:50:15.060 I don't know if it's 80.

00:50:16.840 Yeah.

00:50:17.260 That's it. 0.98

00:50:17.920 Like that one, that black one. 1.00

00:50:21.880 Yeah. 0.93

00:50:22.340 Something like that.

00:50:23.980 Is that you?

00:50:24.740 Yeah, man.

00:50:25.360 That's beautiful, bro.

00:50:26.280 A little bit of Coke on the seat.

00:50:28.740 Hey, it's not mine.

00:50:30.420 It's not mine, dude.

00:50:32.600 I'm just listening to music.

00:50:34.000 That ain't mine, sir.

00:50:35.440 Coke on the seat.

00:50:37.020 That's awesome.

00:50:37.580 I don't think Comedians in Cars has the Coke on the seat.

00:50:42.380 You don't need the coffee then.

00:50:43.640 You don't need the coffee.

00:50:45.700 Yeah, that's a beautiful vehicle right there.

00:50:47.480 I would do also maybe like a Ford F-150, like a 1980.

00:50:52.020 You like a truck?

00:50:53.280 You know what I miss?

00:50:54.180 I like that bench seat, I think.

00:50:56.580 Yeah, it's a lot.

00:50:58.640 It's like a, that's.

00:51:01.440 Yeah, something simple like that.

00:51:03.180 It's just simple.

00:51:03.920 It's like a farm vehicle.

00:51:05.640 Yeah.

00:51:06.400 Like a dog in the back, maybe.

00:51:08.360 Oh, something you could put a, you know, something you could eat as soon as you get home in the back.

00:51:11.860 But after you clean it.

00:51:13.900 Mm-hmm.

00:51:14.540 It's like a hunting truck.

00:51:17.380 Yeah.

00:51:18.780 Yeah, I guess that is a little bit of a hunter vehicle.

00:51:21.060 Oh, here's somebody right here.

00:51:22.840 Yo, yo, Mr. Maniscalco.

00:51:26.220 Johnny here in North Carolina.

00:51:27.740 Just a question for you guys.

00:51:29.880 Since you come from two totally different types of backgrounds.

00:51:32.160 But 10-year-old Theo and 10-year-old Sebastian Maniscalco, you come in from outside playing

00:51:37.620 with your friends, sit out on the couch with your dirty clothes on, put your feet up on

00:51:42.000 the coffee table.

00:51:43.340 What are your father's responses?

00:51:45.260 Gang, gang.

00:51:46.220 I love you.

00:51:47.580 Love you, too, buddy.

00:51:49.980 I got a sweat and also, first of all, I just got a drenched.

00:51:52.620 Hope he's doing okay.

00:51:53.740 Yeah.

00:51:54.660 So.

00:51:55.940 I don't know what.

00:51:56.680 I hope he lived through the end of this.

00:51:57.940 It looked like it ended abruptly.

00:51:59.860 Yeah, it's a lot.

00:52:01.860 Thank you, Johnny.

00:52:03.220 And I hope you're doing well.

00:52:06.960 So, first of all, I come from playing outside.

00:52:11.100 I ain't sitting on no furniture.

00:52:13.620 It's a shower.

00:52:14.600 Right.

00:52:14.980 Right away.

00:52:15.640 Wow.

00:52:16.920 Listen, my house.

00:52:18.760 10 years old.

00:52:20.320 Straight to the shower.

00:52:20.980 Straight to the shower.

00:52:21.760 And you ain't putting your feet up on the furniture.

00:52:23.940 Yeah.

00:52:24.720 Yeah, yeah.

00:52:25.360 That guy's got a unique area he's living in.

00:52:28.940 Um, yeah, my dad, I don't know.

00:52:31.640 My dad was asleep.

00:52:32.380 My dad was 80 years old when I was 10 years old.

00:52:34.620 So.

00:52:35.240 Yeah, you had an older father, right?

00:52:36.700 Last time I think we were.

00:52:37.520 Yeah.

00:52:37.840 You said you had an older dad. 0.99

00:52:39.320 My dad used to borrow money from me to fucking for gas, you know? 0.98

00:52:41.940 Because he didn't have a work. 0.98

00:52:42.760 They didn't hire a lot of 80-year-olds, you know?

00:52:45.000 In a lot of places.

00:52:46.140 Yeah.

00:52:46.900 So, he used to, um, yeah, he used to borrow gas money from me. 0.99

00:52:51.040 And, like, I had a fucking job, dude. 0.99

00:52:52.820 So, that's crazy. 0.99

00:52:53.560 I don't even where he thought I was getting money from, you know?

00:52:55.800 And I was just kind of stealing something from my mom. 0.99

00:52:57.520 So, I was like, damn. 0.99

00:52:59.940 We had some dirty back channels in the house. 0.99

00:53:02.720 But, well, my dad wouldn't notice about that kind of stuff.

00:53:05.440 That kind of stuff was just too menial, I think.

00:53:07.920 Too little.

00:53:09.600 But.

00:53:11.500 What else we got?

00:53:15.180 Gang, gang.

00:53:16.320 Gang, bro.

00:53:16.880 Yo.

00:53:18.140 What up, dawg?

00:53:19.220 You sure you know no racist, too? 1.00

00:53:21.280 Nigga, did, like, the third video I sent your little ass, man. 1.00

00:53:24.000 Oh, damn, bro. 1.00

00:53:24.880 I'm sorry, bud. 0.99

00:53:25.420 What up, dawg, Sebastian?

00:53:26.740 What's up, what's up? 0.99

00:53:27.340 Speak on having a kid, nigga. 1.00

00:53:29.740 Damn. 1.00

00:53:30.460 He wants you to speak on having a kid. 0.99

00:53:32.640 I just had to play that video so he doesn't think we're racist.

00:53:34.900 That was the third one, so.

00:53:35.980 No, I appreciate it.

00:53:36.740 And thanks, brother.

00:53:37.320 We're not racist, or I'm not trying to be.

00:53:39.100 You know, I have some flare-ups in traffic, but overall, I'm good.

00:53:43.960 You know, I'm doing my best, man.

00:53:45.500 I'm out here on the front lines of not trying to be, brother.

00:53:48.620 Thank you for sending in the video.

00:53:51.420 Speak on having a kid, man, yeah.

00:53:53.740 Has it changed your perception or anything a little bit of, like, the world?

00:53:57.320 Do you look at the world any different?

00:53:59.940 Well, yeah, I look at everyday life different.

00:54:01.900 I mean, before, you know, you had a kid.

00:54:04.620 It's just about you and your wife, and now everything is, like,

00:54:08.900 I told you my daughter was sick last night, so it's just the world stops.

00:54:12.600 We were supposed to go see the Los Angeles Football Club play last night at the Exposition Park.

00:54:18.980 Those plans are gone.

00:54:20.360 You know, it's all about the kid. 0.98

00:54:22.180 Thank God that team sounds miserable. 0.83

00:54:25.120 Sorry, brother. 1.00

00:54:25.900 I've never even heard of that shit, brother. 1.00

00:54:27.760 I'm in some fucking shady leagues. 1.00

00:54:30.840 I've got two grand going on fucking Winchester this afternoon outside of South Wales, 0.98

00:54:36.480 so I'll bet on anything. 0.97

00:54:37.640 Never heard of that group.

00:54:39.060 Okay, it's right in our backyard.

00:54:40.940 It's supposed to be an amazing experience.

00:54:44.240 They're in the MLS soccer league.

00:54:46.340 Oh, it's soccer?

00:54:46.820 Soccer, yeah.

00:54:47.480 Okay, I was thinking about American football.

00:54:49.420 No, no.

00:54:50.940 I'm kind of like, it's crazy. 1.00

00:54:52.720 Take your kid to the fucking Rams game, you cheapskate. 1.00

00:54:58.820 It's affordable fun for the whole family. 1.00

00:55:03.240 So I heard it's supposed to be almost like a European type of atmosphere.

00:55:07.580 Oh, nice.

00:55:08.000 Yeah, Ian Edwards goes sometimes.

00:55:09.180 Yeah, Ian.

00:55:09.720 Ian goes.

00:55:10.420 So we were supposed to go there last night.

00:55:12.000 So long story short, in regards to the kid, everything revolves around the kid.

00:55:15.880 It's all about the kid.

00:55:16.680 You go out for a walk in the neighborhood, and you're scanning what's going on around you.

00:55:21.600 Before, you take a walk by yourself. 1.00

00:55:23.200 You could give a shit if you got stabbed. 0.99

00:55:24.780 But now it's like, what's going on over here? 1.00

00:55:28.680 Yeah, there's a dog over here.

00:55:30.260 There's this.

00:55:30.740 There's that.

00:55:31.400 That's a good point.

00:55:32.360 These dogs, and then my kid goes up to the dog.

00:55:36.020 And then I love these owners where you look.

00:55:38.880 I scan the owner.

00:55:40.340 A hundred percent. 0.99

00:55:40.980 And I'm like, does this guy, if things break out, could he even contain the damn thing? 0.95

00:55:47.200 So I'm doing all that 50 yards in advance. 0.97

00:55:51.800 So... 0.99

00:55:52.200 You're like, oh, this guy's a rat. 0.93

00:55:53.400 Or if it's somebody who's like some weak kid, never goes out once a year to walk like 30 dogs 1.00

00:55:58.740 to make all of his money to go back into his fucking dungeon and just get all K-holed out 0.99

00:56:03.320 and just play games until he needs it, you know, until he needs to buy a pack of ramen 0.99

00:56:07.020 again the next winter, you know?

00:56:09.100 And he's got like 40 dogs on a leash.

00:56:11.360 He's out there iditter-riding somewhere in Brentwood. 1.00

00:56:14.600 You're like, this fucking kid can't handle himself. 1.00

00:56:18.100 Yeah. 1.00

00:56:18.260 So I guess you got to look out because the kid doesn't look.

00:56:20.160 The kid isn't thinking about those things.

00:56:21.640 So you almost have to take part of the kid's brain.

00:56:23.600 You almost have to be part of their brain, I guess, huh?

00:56:25.620 Yeah.

00:56:25.900 Well, yeah.

00:56:26.300 You are, you know, guiding this child.

00:56:29.160 And it's a good metaphor through life, you know?

00:56:31.280 And not only when you're walking around the block, but, you know, as they grow older,

00:56:36.180 you know, giving them advice, trying to lead them down the right path.

00:56:39.640 We're very big on manners and please and thank you.

00:56:42.420 Because I see a lot of brats out there, you know, I go to a lot of these, you know,

00:56:45.400 I go to the park and I see, I tap my wife and I go, look at this kid, you know?

00:56:49.340 You can always see the kid that's not misbehaving.

00:56:51.920 He's always got some weird booger hanging out of his nose and whatnot.

00:56:54.680 And, yeah, so, you know, I take a, yeah, especially how I grew up.

00:57:00.020 I grew up with, like, a lot of, like, structure, you know?

00:57:05.120 And I'm trying to instill that in our kids.

00:57:08.420 So that's my rap on the kids.

00:57:11.520 Is it hard?

00:57:12.140 Do you start to worry about, like, being a parent and being able to be around for your

00:57:15.680 kids enough with touring and stuff like that?

00:57:17.380 Yeah.

00:57:17.540 So my daughter's been to 23 cities already and our son, it's going to be a little bit

00:57:24.000 harder to travel with two kids, but they're coming to the VMAs.

00:57:26.800 They'll come to, like, really large event-type shows where, you know, maybe Chicago, where

00:57:33.140 I'm from, they'll go back there.

00:57:34.860 But, yeah, I cut out the whole summer to be at home and hang with the family.

00:57:42.760 And, again, we were talking about just having some balance, you know, and that you can't

00:57:46.300 always be on the road, at least for me with a family.

00:57:50.120 I just, I need to cut out some segments in the schedule to hang with my daughter, my son,

00:57:57.800 and my wife.

00:57:58.280 So I make that a priority.

00:57:59.680 Yeah.

00:58:00.180 And it looks like you guys have fun, man.

00:58:01.540 I watch a lot of your Instagram stories, and it's like, oh, you guys are having a blast

00:58:04.500 over there.

00:58:04.920 Fun, bro.

00:58:05.280 It's all, that's all we do at the house.

00:58:07.180 It's all about fun.

00:58:08.260 Yeah, we, there's serious moments, don't get me wrong, but my wife and I were constantly 0.99

00:58:13.200 ripping each other to shreds, especially her on me, you know, there's no room. 0.81

00:58:18.220 That's how I grew up, too.

00:58:19.180 I mean, I got friends, like, speaking of comedians in cars, my buddy called me and said, bro,

00:58:23.740 I saw you in comedians in cars.

00:58:24.740 You look gold, man. 0.99

00:58:26.080 What the hell? 0.99

00:58:27.320 You hung over? 0.99

00:58:28.520 You know, like, there's no filter, you know?

00:58:31.720 It's just, that's, we just constantly make fun of one another, and that's.

00:58:35.300 You're like, yeah, I'm hung over from 40 years of my life.

00:58:38.880 That's great.

00:58:40.120 So, yeah, keeps me grounded.

00:58:43.300 What's a DM that you've got from, like, somebody who is, like, a fan, or, like, somebody you

00:58:46.860 really admire, like, something nice like that?

00:58:48.580 Did anything ever happen like that?

00:58:49.940 Like, Dennis Rodman sent me a peace sign the other day for no reason, and then never wrote

00:58:53.760 me back, right?

00:58:54.400 This is about two weeks ago.

00:58:55.560 So, did you write him back from the peace sign?

00:58:58.660 Yeah, I wrote, oh, thanks, man.

00:59:00.540 And then I asked him something like, what's going on?

00:59:03.500 You know, do you live in L.A. or something?

00:59:05.060 And I didn't get anything back.

00:59:07.680 But it was just kind of interesting.

00:59:09.660 Yeah, it's always, it's always, the first DM I really got through, it was actually through

00:59:16.020 Twitter, was about six or seven years ago, and it was from J.J. Watt.

00:59:20.760 Wow.

00:59:21.120 He was a rookie in the league, and he had reached out to me via Twitter and said that

00:59:25.340 he had been a fan since high school.

00:59:27.180 And then I started to think, wow, I'm really getting old, because this guy was in high school

00:59:32.620 when he picked up what I was doing.

00:59:34.200 Right.

00:59:34.400 And then we've been, you know, we became fast friends.

00:59:37.920 We've been friends forever since.

00:59:39.500 So, that was pretty cool.

00:59:41.780 And The Rock had posted a clip of, he was watching my comedy, and he posted up on, and that.

00:59:50.280 That had to be a unique moment then, kind of.

00:59:52.100 Well, I mean, out of all the stuff I've done, that one got, like, I had people coming out

00:59:56.920 of the woodwork for 20, The Rock put your stuff on his Instagram, it was bigger than

01:00:01.580 any, like, network.

01:00:03.460 Everything.

01:00:04.140 Bigger than all the specials, everything.

01:00:06.160 One share of The Rock.

01:00:07.400 Yeah.

01:00:07.760 Wow.

01:00:07.880 He shared it, and I was getting like, did you see what The Rock did?

01:00:11.780 So, yeah, it's cool, you know, to, because you don't even know, like, when you're doing

01:00:17.060 this stuff, you don't know who you're hitting, who's listening to this right now, who's

01:00:21.820 seeing your comedy, and with the internet, it gives you an idea of, you know, how far

01:00:29.580 your tentacles are reaching people.

01:00:32.340 And it's cool to see, like, oh, wow, he's a fan, or she's a fan.

01:00:35.580 I wouldn't think they would, like, maybe like what I do, or what have you, but it's

01:00:40.220 flattering.

01:00:40.940 Yeah.

01:00:42.180 Yeah, it's interesting how much access everyone kind of has to everybody, really.

01:00:47.000 Yeah, I mean, if the internet was around when I was a kid, you know, I'd be, like,

01:00:50.400 popping DMs to Prince going, bro, love what you're doing, you know, like.

01:00:55.520 Let's dance, yeah.

01:00:56.120 Let's dance.

01:00:57.220 Look at my disco outfit.

01:01:00.020 Do you think of, now, as you start to, like, act in films and stuff, did you ever think

01:01:03.740 that you would do that, though?

01:01:04.780 I mean, I just feel like it would have to be no.

01:01:07.840 Did you ever think that?

01:01:08.720 I mean, I think a lot of comedians think of sitcom or something sometimes.

01:01:11.340 It's kind of a natural train of thought, especially, like, you know, coming up in the era and

01:01:15.160 time that you've come up in through comedy.

01:01:17.140 But do you ever think movies, though?

01:01:19.260 I mean, do you really?

01:01:20.280 I wanted to do movies, but I wanted to do a little bit more serious roles than comedic,

01:01:25.440 goofy stuff.

01:01:26.100 I'm not a goofy guy.

01:01:26.880 Yeah, you're not.

01:01:27.680 So I'm actually a serious guy.

01:01:30.760 Yeah.

01:01:30.940 And the serious roles kind of play to my real personality, kind of offstage of just kind

01:01:36.740 of being a little bit more straight than, like, hey, you know, it's not what I do.

01:01:42.000 So I like the fact that this serious, dramatic roles give me a nice little departure from

01:01:49.020 what I do to, you know, day in, day out on stage.

01:01:52.820 And I think it's a nice little contrast for me.

01:01:55.480 So, yeah, I've always had movies in the back of my mind.

01:01:58.280 Not to be, like, a movie star.

01:02:00.560 But to do, like, projects here and there, a little pop into a movie, pop out.

01:02:04.400 You know, I don't want to be the guy that's, like, you know, maybe carrying the movie.

01:02:08.720 That seems like a lot of responsibility.

01:02:09.840 Yeah, I mean, especially if you don't, you know, do it on a regular basis.

01:02:14.420 But, yeah, I like what I'm doing with these movies.

01:02:16.360 And I'm fortunate enough to make a living doing stand-up where I could do the acting

01:02:20.300 and it doesn't have to feed my family.

01:02:22.920 You know what I'm saying?

01:02:23.460 So I don't have to take a role just to take it.

01:02:25.540 Because movies don't pay anything.

01:02:27.320 Yeah, there's not.

01:02:28.040 I mean, for me, it's more of an exposure and being in a broader audience.

01:02:34.020 Similar to, you know, like podcasts.

01:02:35.720 You know, like you go on a podcast and hopefully, you know, coming on your podcast, you know.

01:02:41.360 We'll send people to see the film.

01:02:42.780 Yeah.

01:02:43.180 And, you know, I'm reaching people that maybe don't know who I am or, hey, let's see what

01:02:48.640 this guy's podcast is all about and whatnot.

01:02:51.640 So I like kind of – and also, I like you and you're a cool cat.

01:02:55.800 And it's like I don't go on everybody's podcast.

01:02:58.000 But, you know.

01:02:59.860 Yeah, no, I appreciate it, man.

01:03:01.000 I mean, I've always looked up to you ever since I got turned on to you, man.

01:03:04.020 I just – yeah, you kind of reminded me always that like an entertainer can kind of still –

01:03:08.160 there is still something to that.

01:03:10.060 Like always – like it started to feel like comedy was just about like joke writers and stuff.

01:03:13.720 And maybe that was my own, you know, fears or something.

01:03:16.980 But like, oh, man, these – it's just people that are writers that they're putting on stage.

01:03:21.840 But then seeing you, it was like, oh, man, you can still be like an entertainer.

01:03:25.200 You know, you can still be – you can still have dreams somewhere in your head if you're, you know.

01:03:29.800 Like I remember even asking you for advice one time.

01:03:32.080 You said, just go watch Michael Jackson Munich, you know. 0.99

01:03:34.820 That's what you fucking told me. 0.99

01:03:36.820 And – 1.00

01:03:37.240 I remember that.

01:03:37.880 I was at the improv with my wife.

01:03:39.820 I think you met my wife for the first time.

01:03:41.560 We were hanging out at the improv.

01:03:42.720 This is about maybe six, seven years ago.

01:03:45.560 But you were – back then, and maybe I'm wrong by saying this, but back then, you weren't a very happy man.

01:03:53.820 You were not as happy as you are right now.

01:03:57.300 And you were, you know, you were – I don't know.

01:04:00.900 You were kind of struggling.

01:04:02.540 Not with your career, but just kind of – I could just feel like when we were talking, you were in maybe not so good of a place.

01:04:09.960 I remember my wife and I talking as we left.

01:04:12.080 Oh, he's such a nice guy, but he feels like he's a little down and whatnot.

01:04:15.460 So is that correct in saying that?

01:04:18.740 Yeah, yeah.

01:04:19.180 I think that's pretty true.

01:04:20.140 Yeah, I think I started to hit a little bit of a wall like I wasn't going to have – you know, I just didn't know if I was doing the right thing.

01:04:26.820 The opportunities, you know, didn't seem like they were presenting any of themselves.

01:04:32.100 But, yeah, I mean, that's a good example of someone that might not think it's going to happen and maybe running into these roadblocks and all of a sudden, boom, look at this.

01:04:42.900 We're in Podcastville.

01:04:45.320 Yeah, that's true.

01:04:46.500 You know, I mean, it's like – it just – it happens, you know?

01:04:50.060 You've got to stick with it.

01:04:52.200 And next thing you know –

01:04:53.380 You've got your own graffiti.

01:04:56.940 It's got to happen.

01:04:58.040 Oh, my God.

01:04:58.560 Do we have any other questions from the crew here?

01:05:00.540 Were any of those guys in the Irishman, like since they're all Italian guys, were they fans of your comedy and watched it?

01:05:06.000 Yeah, I didn't know if they knew what I even did or if they knew I was a stand-up comedian.

01:05:11.700 I didn't know any of that.

01:05:13.320 So going into this, the first day when De Niro came out, he came up to me and he said, I hear you're doing good things.

01:05:22.280 And I'm like –

01:05:23.320 You're like, what?

01:05:24.260 Oh, my God.

01:05:25.280 Does he – did someone tell him to say that?

01:05:28.300 Does he know a day trade?

01:05:30.940 I'm like, what's going on here?

01:05:32.900 So, yeah, I didn't know.

01:05:35.480 I didn't know what the hell they knew, and I still don't.

01:05:38.020 I mean, De Niro had came to my show at Radio City after The Irishman, which we talked backstage more than we ever talked on set.

01:05:51.100 I didn't talk to him at all.

01:05:52.600 Really?

01:05:53.400 No.

01:05:53.580 So you just go do your stuff and then kind of go back to your corner?

01:05:56.880 Yeah.

01:05:57.300 Well, they went to their corner and I went to my corner.

01:06:01.000 Yeah.

01:06:02.240 And, you know, they were talking amongst themselves.

01:06:05.160 Like, it would be like Cut and then De Niro and Pesci and Scorsese would kind of talk amongst themselves.

01:06:10.840 And then I'd be like, I wasn't going to go in the huddle and go –

01:06:13.920 You're like, oh.

01:06:14.380 Yeah, I think so, too.

01:06:16.640 You know, like, what am I going to do?

01:06:18.260 I was on the sideline. 0.98

01:06:20.160 Yeah, like, I'm going to go have another mini snicker over here while these guys fucking predict my future. 0.95

01:06:26.140 Decide if I'm good enough to hang out here for another minute. 0.93

01:06:29.700 Wow, that's – man, that would be very intimidating, man.

01:06:33.440 Well, they all know each other.

01:06:34.480 They work together.

01:06:35.300 Yeah.

01:06:35.460 So, right, they got their own thing going.

01:06:36.940 So, you know, I was like the new guy there in that particular scene.

01:06:41.780 And, you know, I'm looking at it like if I'm not invited in the huddle, you know, I ain't going to go over there.

01:06:49.460 Yeah, no, of course.

01:06:50.600 But, yeah, I didn't talk to really anyone on set because I didn't know if – it's another thing.

01:06:56.140 They yell, cut.

01:06:56.720 I don't know if this guy's still in character or I don't know what he's doing.

01:07:00.340 You know, they yell, cut, and I'm thinking, okay, you know, I'm me.

01:07:04.700 Yeah.

01:07:06.520 I'm not, like, doing some, like, method where I'm like, you know, hold on.

01:07:10.440 Unless, you know, they can't talk to me because I'm still crazy Joe Gallo.

01:07:14.480 I mean, I cut, and like you said, I'm, you know, getting a little cube cheese thinking, eh, it's cheddar.

01:07:20.940 So, I didn't want to, like, interrupt anybody's process.

01:07:25.360 Yeah.

01:07:26.000 But –

01:07:27.280 Were you amazed how good of actors they were?

01:07:29.500 I was – I don't really remember – the only thing I do remember is me thinking while I was acting that I couldn't believe I was doing this with these guys.

01:07:48.160 Yeah.

01:07:48.320 So, I mean, I don't even know if that's being in the moment and acting when you're thinking, you know –

01:07:54.040 Yeah, definitely not.

01:07:54.920 But, I mean, yeah, I can totally relate to it.

01:07:56.980 Like, you're in a lifeguard chair up above yourself kind of a little bit.

01:07:59.560 Yeah. 0.97

01:07:59.900 Like, dude, what are you fucking doing down there, you know? 0.99

01:08:03.100 Bro, that's the adult pool, dude. 1.00

01:08:04.740 You got fucking flippers on, buddy. 0.99

01:08:07.480 But, yeah, I can imagine that your mouth moving and a little bit of your head also talking like, okay, here we go. 0.99

01:08:13.320 Yeah, a lot of, like, inner dialogue while I'm doing dialogue, which is – which I think what comedians do, though, I mean, don't you ever go on stage and talk to yourself in your head while you're speaking to the audience?

01:08:28.020 Sometimes, yeah.

01:08:29.140 Yeah.

01:08:29.360 So, this was just that I was actually taking in the moment and I couldn't believe what was happening.

01:08:37.600 But then I'm also acting at the same time, which is probably not the best thing to do, but I'm sorry.

01:08:42.320 I had to – these are, like, the guys I grew up watching.

01:08:45.940 Yeah.

01:08:47.080 Man, it's kind of crazy because especially, like, being, you know, being an Italian guy, you grew up – I mean, those are the guys, you know, that are still alive.

01:08:54.400 Those are the guys.

01:08:55.180 Yeah.

01:08:56.280 And Stallone.

01:08:57.220 And Stallone.

01:08:57.820 The brother – Sylvester.

01:09:01.660 Who's the brother?

01:09:02.340 Frank.

01:09:03.180 Frank Stallone.

01:09:03.860 Dude, I see Frank at the gym always trying to pump a lot of young buckets, you know, all the time. 0.99

01:09:07.920 But we can always take that out if we need to.

01:09:12.000 That's an edit.

01:09:13.100 But I know a lot of guys that have been hit on by old Frank Stallone.

01:09:16.560 He's almost like Pauly Shore at CVS.

01:09:18.360 Pauly used to try to bang every girl that was looking for a birthday card at CVS.

01:09:22.300 Bro, I know nine girls that have been – I was just looking for a birthday card for my mother.

01:09:27.160 And Pauly Shore came around the bin.

01:09:31.000 I've heard that story so many times, bro.

01:09:32.880 It's crazy.

01:09:33.420 It's a really good ground because you know there's a woman there who's, like, sentimental.

01:09:37.280 She cares about her.

01:09:38.180 She's caring, you know. 0.99

01:09:39.600 At least you know you're not – you know, you're meeting somebody that's – not somebody that's picking out a fucking, you know, 24-pack of fucking hot nuts over by the Sprite, you know. 0.98

01:09:47.780 Like, who's that girl? 0.99

01:09:49.260 Who is that?

01:09:51.020 Wow, man.

01:09:51.800 So does it feel a little bit like – like when you're working with your idols, is it almost then hard to find, like, what's next to keep you excited?

01:10:02.180 Or is that –

01:10:03.740 German dialect.

01:10:05.360 It's really true.

01:10:07.440 It's very – no, honestly, you're right.

01:10:10.300 It's –

01:10:11.060 That's insane, bro.

01:10:13.040 It's something that you – after that experience, that experience probably should have came at the end of a career.

01:10:19.840 Right.

01:10:20.020 But it came at kind of, like, the beginning.

01:10:22.240 So it's, like, where do you go from there after you're coming off such a big high?

01:10:26.540 But, yeah, I mean, I just want to do stuff that I'm really, really passionate about and with people who are really talented and know what they're doing.

01:10:37.320 Wow.

01:10:38.320 So –

01:10:38.920 And the – you're going to be dancing in this – in the new film you're going to be –

01:10:42.360 No, no.

01:10:42.700 You're not.

01:10:43.160 No, no.

01:10:43.600 It's about – it's about disco in the 70s, and I'm, like, the – one of the fathers of disco just because of the way this Georgia Maroder did a lot of sounds and music behind the vocalist.

01:10:56.480 He was, you know, responsible for Donna Summer in short.

01:11:02.160 But, yeah, there's no dancing.

01:11:05.040 Oh, dancing.

01:11:05.540 No.

01:11:06.220 There's a couple of scenes I'm in, but there's no –

01:11:09.000 Oh.

01:11:09.340 There's no – although if it requires dancing, I am more than happy.

01:11:15.220 Yeah, I just see you doing that, man.

01:11:17.060 No, I got to tell you, I grew up dancing.

01:11:20.720 Oh, yeah.

01:11:21.340 We went to the dance clubs.

01:11:23.020 That's all we did.

01:11:23.860 Did y'all, like, Sock Ops, YMCA, what did you guys go to?

01:11:26.100 No, we went to – they used to call them dance parties.

01:11:30.860 And –

01:11:31.380 No, Sock Ops.

01:11:34.040 This was at a – this was at a – on a Sunday night at a bar called Totos.

01:11:41.280 Oh, yeah.

01:11:41.940 Which turned into a teen dance club on Sunday night, right?

01:11:44.900 So we'd go, and me and my buddy Francesco had these shirts made up, and on the back of it says, talk about weird.

01:11:56.780 Your audience will love this.

01:11:58.860 We had on the back of the shirt Italian boys. 1.00

01:12:02.660 Oh, holy shit. 0.98

01:12:04.840 And we used to – me and him used to do the same moves with these shirts on. 0.99

01:12:11.780 So you guys are synchronized Italians?

01:12:14.940 Synchronized Italian dancers.

01:12:16.400 Like, we would practice all week because we thought we were going to pick up girls because of the way we danced, right?

01:12:23.100 But this is the 80s, man.

01:12:25.460 Oh, dude.

01:12:25.700 So many hand movements. 1.00

01:12:27.100 You put your fucking buddy's eye out. 1.00

01:12:29.300 Yeah, your buddy's got on fucking – 1.00

01:12:30.960 There was a lot of up here, you know. 0.99

01:12:33.560 The hands were always up by the head for some reason.

01:12:38.520 A lot of look-offs.

01:12:40.980 So that's what we – the whole – like, my – from 16 years old to about 22, I had a fake ID at 16.

01:12:50.620 And my fake ID was unbelievable.

01:12:52.060 And whose was it?

01:12:52.660 Was it actually you or was it somebody else's name?

01:12:54.160 It was me.

01:12:54.460 Wow.

01:12:55.120 It was me.

01:12:55.580 And it was – my dad actually helped me get it.

01:12:57.480 And I used to buy alcohol for guys who were older than me.

01:13:03.720 We were going to the clubs.

01:13:05.080 I didn't really hang out in high school.

01:13:06.740 I didn't go to the basketball games, football games.

01:13:08.760 What we were doing was we were going to dance parties.

01:13:10.640 And then when we got the ID, we were going to bars.

01:13:12.540 So I was 17.

01:13:13.320 I was hanging out at, you know, over 21 nightclubs.

01:13:16.520 Yeah.

01:13:17.120 And dancing.

01:13:17.840 I didn't wear the Italian boy shirt to the –

01:13:20.700 Yeah, no.

01:13:21.340 That was kind of a limited time.

01:13:22.860 Yeah, it was a limited, you know, a summer.

01:13:25.240 So great.

01:13:25.940 So, yeah, that's what we were – that's kind of how I grew up.

01:13:29.580 That whole, you know, taking care of the car.

01:13:33.340 You know, I used to drive a 1982 Seville with white walls, spoked rims.

01:13:42.040 Beautiful, beautiful car.

01:13:43.460 Slanted back trunk.

01:13:45.340 Oh, yeah.

01:13:45.880 That's sexy, bro.

01:13:46.880 With the outline of the spare tire.

01:13:49.140 Yeah.

01:13:49.460 Oh, God.

01:13:50.680 With a spoked rim on the back.

01:13:52.160 Oh, yeah.

01:13:53.540 Man, class is different now.

01:13:56.060 Isn't it?

01:13:56.400 It just – it's different.

01:13:57.540 The thing's a little less classy.

01:13:59.480 Yeah.

01:13:59.860 I think it's a lot less classy.

01:14:02.140 I just – there's like a decorum back then, at least where I grew up, that you kind of – you had respect for your elders.

01:14:08.860 You, you know, you just – if you did something, you didn't want to, like, embarrass your family.

01:14:13.960 Yeah.

01:14:14.300 You know, like –

01:14:15.040 Now people sue their families since they can hire a lawyer. 1.00

01:14:18.260 Like, I'm suing all of you motherfuckers for raising me. 1.00

01:14:21.220 It's just – it's gotten crazy. 1.00

01:14:22.400 It's crazy.

01:14:22.920 There's no family respect anymore.

01:14:24.500 It's different.

01:14:25.220 Well, the family dynamic is not there anymore.

01:14:27.460 You don't have – you don't have the family anymore.

01:14:30.080 Everybody's too wrapped up in a video game or – and I don't mean to sound like some old man, but the way we grew up and I think the way our family was structured was, you know, you sat at the kitchen table and you were talking to your parents.

01:14:45.000 There was no, like – your attention span wasn't here or there.

01:14:49.960 It was like we're eating and, you know, we'd sit at the table for two hours just talking to my parents.

01:14:55.180 My parents were the type of parents where everybody wanted to hang out at our house because my parents were, like, the fun – you know, they loved my friends and talking to them and we all –

01:15:05.020 Like the end of the movie and the book.

01:15:07.740 The Green Book.

01:15:07.860 The Green Book, yeah.

01:15:08.520 Yeah.

01:15:08.700 Similar to that vibe where everybody's around and eating, kind of like food brought everybody together.

01:15:15.000 But anyway, you just don't see that now.

01:15:17.220 It's just – it still exists and I think people are longing for that, but now it's like, you know, you go out to a restaurant, you see a family, everybody's on the device.

01:15:27.140 Everybody's dialed out, yeah.

01:15:28.240 Yeah.

01:15:28.560 And the devices are part of our lifestyle, don't get me wrong.

01:15:31.880 It's not like you have to totally put it away, but even with our kids, we're teaching them, you know, you get it for a small amount of time and then after that, you know, let's –

01:15:41.840 Let's get back to the burrata.

01:15:43.180 Yeah. 0.99

01:15:43.540 Let's fucking get into what matters over here. 0.99

01:15:47.340 There's no app better than burrata, all right? 0.99

01:15:50.740 I got a fucking hot batch of burrata that fell off a boat in Providence. 0.96

01:15:54.860 I want you to try. 0.98

01:15:57.240 Good on you guys then?

01:15:58.420 Yeah.

01:15:58.900 What you got, Johnny?

01:16:00.200 We just have one Patreon question for Sebastian.

01:16:02.540 All right.

01:16:02.840 And it is from Faye Dvorak.

01:16:05.720 And if you were invited to a potluck dinner, what homemade dish would you bring and who would you bring?

01:16:10.780 Not your wife. 0.97

01:16:11.780 Someone else.

01:16:12.940 Potluck dinner, what would I bring?

01:16:15.340 There is a Sicilian dish called pasta tayan, which is pasta layered with strip steak, pine nuts, some red – it's a red sauce.

01:16:28.720 It's layered.

01:16:30.020 Wow.

01:16:30.220 It takes a long time to –

01:16:31.860 You don't hear about that a lot.

01:16:33.220 No, it's very, very specific to – actually, it's not even Sicilian dish.

01:16:37.580 It's a town in Sicily called Sheffalu, where my father's from.

01:16:41.940 It's very specific to that town.

01:16:43.620 And who would I bring?

01:16:45.020 My father.

01:16:46.440 If it wasn't my wife, I'd bring my father. 0.98

01:16:48.060 My father is a character.

01:16:49.080 He is?

01:16:49.780 He's a hairstylist, and he's where I pretty much get a lot of the – he thinks he's a comedian behind the chair.

01:16:59.000 Everybody loves my dad at the salon.

01:17:01.540 He must be so proud of you then, huh?

01:17:03.460 My dad is very proud.

01:17:05.300 He's 74.

01:17:06.100 He's still cutting hair.

01:17:06.900 Oh, he's still young.

01:17:08.120 Well, I mean, 74 to be cutting hair.

01:17:09.840 I mean, it's like people – it's a young business.

01:17:13.520 It's not like people are walking in the salon going, I'll have the guy with the ARP card cut my hair.

01:17:18.980 You know, his client –

01:17:19.680 He thinks everybody's going to the military. 0.99

01:17:21.080 He's fucking getting kind of crazy. 0.99

01:17:23.520 Well, he's not a barber. 1.00

01:17:24.720 He's a stylist.

01:17:25.800 Oh.

01:17:26.100 So he does women's hair. 0.89

01:17:27.420 He does colors.

01:17:28.640 He does all that stuff.

01:17:29.780 But he's had clients for 40 years, and they're passing away.

01:17:33.840 They're dying.

01:17:34.720 And in the will, they are requesting my father to do –

01:17:41.040 The last Shabbat, huh?

01:17:42.640 Dead hair.

01:17:43.500 Wow.

01:17:43.740 So my father's going to funeral parlors, and he loves it because they don't say nothing.

01:17:48.940 They don't – you know, they don't ask, you know.

01:17:50.940 He just does what he has to do.

01:17:53.100 He's just leaning over.

01:17:54.780 Hey, I did the hair. 0.99

01:17:55.680 Oh, who would have fucking – that suit's horrible, but hey, look above the ears. 0.99

01:18:00.780 Yeah, that's crazy. 0.99

01:18:03.420 So, yeah, that's – yeah, he's very proud.

01:18:06.120 My whole family is very proud.

01:18:07.620 Yeah.

01:18:08.240 Is it hard to embrace sometimes, like, how – is it hard?

01:18:12.320 Like, I get worried sometimes as my career gets bigger that, like, you know, I don't want my family to ever think that I'm different or anything.

01:18:20.340 Does that – do you ever worry about that kind of stuff?

01:18:22.900 No, I think – I mean, listen, I'm 46 years old.

01:18:25.340 I've been at this for 21 years.

01:18:27.240 I've been the same guy when I moved out here in 1998 that I am now, regardless of success or what has happened to me over the last three or four years.

01:18:36.660 Very, very grounded coming into Los Angeles with family and friends.

01:18:42.280 And, no, I mean, my family is – you know, they treat me as if, you know, I was 21 or 24 years old when I first came out here.

01:18:52.840 There's no difference.

01:18:53.960 Yeah.

01:18:54.360 It's pretty much the same.

01:18:57.040 Yeah.

01:18:57.420 I think I asked you that last time, too, and it was kind of a similar answer.

01:19:00.540 But that's awesome, man.

01:19:01.580 That's cool to hear.

01:19:02.460 It's inspiring and it's insightful.

01:19:04.680 Wow, man.

01:19:05.280 Living your dreams, dude.

01:19:06.840 Living the dream.

01:19:08.000 And dreams that you didn't even have, dude, the VMAs.

01:19:10.660 The VMAs and, yeah.

01:19:14.000 When I first came out here, it was stand-up comedy.

01:19:16.660 That's all I wanted to do, just stand-up comedy.

01:19:18.440 I didn't, like I said, put on any goal.

01:19:23.240 There was no goals.

01:19:24.460 It was just to do stand-up comedy.

01:19:25.640 And then whatever happened after that, it was like gravy to me.

01:19:28.640 So for me to be in the position I'm in to do all these really great things, I'm very – I never take it for granted.

01:19:35.500 I'm very fortunate.

01:19:36.800 And I'm always wondering, you know, like for me, the fear is to try to stay consistent and not – you know, like whatever comes up is going to come down eventually.

01:19:46.680 Right.

01:19:47.040 But you kind of want to get to a certain place and just – and really maintain, you know.

01:19:51.740 Like that's why when you go to my show, I'm always trying to rewrite new material just to bring the people back or, you know, go on shows like this and give more of a little bit of my personality and personal side of me so people get to know.

01:20:06.800 The ins and outs of who I am, so.

01:20:09.940 Yeah, and bringing people along on your journey, you know.

01:20:11.880 It's pretty cool.

01:20:12.620 I think, yeah, a lot of people just – they want to kind of know what it's like just from like a regular perspective, you know, not from like something that's very canned.

01:20:20.680 You know, they want it fresh out the garden, you know.

01:20:22.680 Fresh out the garden, yeah.

01:20:24.140 Yeah, you had this bit the other day.

01:20:25.600 You were talking about swimming, which is great.

01:20:27.020 I'm not going to talk about it because, you know, I know that, you know, people will be coming out to see it.

01:20:32.080 But over at UCLA, that bit you were doing.

01:20:34.620 Yeah, so I'm swimming.

01:20:35.620 I started swimming.

01:20:36.640 I'm 46 years old, and I never learned to swim before.

01:20:39.500 And I'm taking swimming lessons at UCLA with an ex-Olympian who's German, actually.

01:20:44.980 Pretty crazy.

01:20:46.020 Well, I learned the accent at the same time.

01:20:49.360 One last thing.

01:20:50.360 So you were saying – let me get this thought right.

01:20:52.840 So did you start to worry at some point that if you got married or settled down or something that it was going to damage like your thinking process or your performance process or anything like that when it came to stand-up?

01:21:06.520 Early on, I thought that way.

01:21:08.700 I thought, hey, I don't want anything kind of impeding my process here of, like, touring.

01:21:14.640 I don't want a girlfriend telling me, hey, you can't go on the road because we haven't spent time together.

01:21:19.060 So early on, I thought, let me just get to where I need to get to, and then maybe I'll find someone, settle down, have a family.

01:21:28.460 I don't think I could have done what I'm doing now with kids and a wife 10 years ago just because of the amount of time and energy it takes to put in.

01:21:37.860 And I told my agent, I said, book me wherever you can.

01:21:41.700 I don't care if it's Monday through Sunday in Las Vegas, 14 shows.

01:21:45.820 I'll do whatever it takes to establish an audience and whatnot.

01:21:49.120 So when you got kids and a family at home, that's very difficult.

01:21:52.340 I really don't know how guys do it.

01:21:53.760 It's amazing when I hear, like, you got three kids and he's trying to get to the top.

01:22:00.360 But for me, the personality I have, I'm like kind of all or nothing.

01:22:03.700 So now I just think it happened organically for me when I met my wife.

01:22:11.780 It just kind of all fit, right place, right time.

01:22:15.560 This is, let's go on this journey together.

01:22:17.620 We'll start having kids when we could afford it and then available for the kids.

01:22:23.200 So, yeah.

01:22:24.080 And early on, I definitely did not want to have a family and or a steady that would kind of keep me from where I wanted to go.

01:22:34.600 Yeah.

01:22:35.360 Which is kind of selfish, but.

01:22:37.540 You have to be, though, a little bit, I think.

01:22:38.880 Yeah.

01:22:38.920 You have to have a little bit of selfishness to put the time and energy it takes to get to where you need to go.

01:22:45.320 There's a lot of sacrifice, I think, people don't really realize.

01:22:48.320 You know, like, even over the years, like, I've had to miss a lot of people's weddings, like, events back at home.

01:22:52.500 I lost friends because I said I would be at the wedding and then I couldn't make it, you know, because I just got a new agent and they just got me a weekend and I didn't want to lose them, you know.

01:23:01.100 Just, yeah, there's a lot of weird sacrifice that people don't understand sometimes. 0.99

01:23:04.820 Pets, come home, your fucking pets are dead, you know. 0.99

01:23:07.720 Yeah, I never had that happen, but. 1.00

01:23:10.400 Are you serious, really?

01:23:11.460 I never had pets. 0.99

01:23:11.940 Oh, there's a whole group of us that have fucking lost animals, bro. 0.98

01:23:14.520 Just because of the script you went on the road? 0.98

01:23:17.540 Oh, jeez.

01:23:19.060 Wrong, man.

01:23:19.920 Oh, my God.

01:23:21.000 No, for me, it was no pets, no girlfriend, no kids.

01:23:25.200 And I totally relate to you when you said missing weddings.

01:23:30.360 I missed a really good friend of mine's wedding back in Chicago because I just didn't have the money to go and I had to work.

01:23:37.220 I was working as a waiter, you know, and, you know, unfortunately, I probably made the wrong decision at the time.

01:23:43.400 I probably should have found a way to go, but, yeah, you're right.

01:23:47.460 There's a lot of sacrifice you've got to make if you want to succeed.

01:23:53.720 Hopefully, you don't lose friends doing it, but it's the risk you've got to take.

01:23:58.300 Man, best of luck, man.

01:23:59.260 Thanks so much for coming on.

01:24:00.760 Thank you for having me.

01:24:01.880 And we'll put all of your stuff at the beginning and tell people about the film.

01:24:05.260 Yeah, man, that was so cool seeing you in the green book, man.

01:24:08.280 Well, thanks, man.

01:24:08.840 It was nice to see me up on the big screen.

01:24:12.180 I know.

01:24:12.700 It was pretty cool.

01:24:13.420 Did you start to feel yourself, like, towards it, like, you're like, oh, wow, I kind of got the hang of this a little bit?

01:24:17.940 Yeah, like, I mean, I think your assessment on the acting from front to back was dead on accurate.

01:24:25.180 That first scene was, like I said, the first scene I've ever done.

01:24:29.300 And then as I shot that out of the cannon and got to know the director more, Peter Farrelly was the director.

01:24:37.340 And, you know, there's another guy.

01:24:38.600 I love his comedy movies, so it was another intimidating working with him.

01:24:42.560 And I was just hoping to get it right.

01:24:44.320 And then, you know, the scenes after that, I felt a lot more at home.

01:24:48.480 It's just like anything else.

01:24:49.360 You go to the first day of school, you don't know what to expect.

01:24:51.500 You're probably not yourself.

01:24:52.920 And then after you make a friend or two, you start to kind of let down your guard.

01:24:56.960 Yeah.

01:24:58.020 Hopefully, when I'm moving forward, I could act, when it's the first day of shooting, I could act like it's the second week of school.

01:25:08.140 Right.

01:25:08.440 You know what I'm saying?

01:25:09.000 Yeah, a little more dialed in.

01:25:10.300 Yeah. 0.86

01:25:10.620 You know, maybe you got a gun on your waist. 1.00

01:25:12.400 Maybe you got a knife strapped to my back. 0.99

01:25:14.560 I don't know.

01:25:16.480 Sebastian Maniscalco, thank you so much, man.

01:25:18.260 Best of luck.

01:25:19.260 We look forward to seeing you everywhere.

01:25:20.940 Thank you, bro.

01:25:21.420 Now, I'm just floating on the breeze, and I feel I'm falling like these leaves.

01:25:28.340 I must be cornerstone.

01:25:33.600 Oh, but when I reach that ground, I'll share this peace of mind I found.

01:25:38.980 I can feel it in my bones, but it's going to take a little time for me to set that parking brake and let myself unwind.

01:25:55.760 Shine that light on me.

01:25:58.740 I'll sit and tell you my stories Shine on me And I will find a song I will sing it just for you

01:26:17.340 And I've been moving way too fast On the runaway train with a heavy load of my

01:26:27.720 past And these rails that I've been riding on They're worn so thin that they're damn near gone

01:26:37.820 I guess now they just weren't built to last Yeah, I'm gonna try

01:26:44.360 To make sense of what I can Of where I'm going

01:26:50.060 Oh, and where I'll be Shine that light on me

01:26:57.060 Shine that light on me And I'll sit and tell you my stories

01:27:03.160 Shine on me And I'll be finding a song I will sing it just for you

01:27:15.060 And I will sing it just for you And I will find the words to help you make it through

01:27:20.060 If you call my name Oh, I'll sing them to you

01:27:25.160 Shine that light on me I'll sit and tell you my stories

01:27:35.060 Shine that light on me Shine on me

01:27:37.060 Shine on me And I will find a song I will sing it just for you

01:27:47.060 Oh, I will shine on me Yeah, shine on me

01:28:02.060 Shine, shine on me Shine, shine on me

01:28:20.060 Ladies and gentlemen, I'm Jonathan Kite, and welcome to Kite Club, a podcast where I'll

01:28:45.000 be sharing thoughts on things like current events, stand-up stories, and seven ways to

01:28:49.680 pleasure your partner.

01:28:51.260 The answer may shock you.

01:28:52.980 Sometimes I'll interview my friends.

01:28:55.120 Sometimes I won't.

01:28:56.720 And as always, I'll be joined by the voices in my head.

01:28:59.660 You have three new voice messages.

01:29:02.640 A lot of people are talking about Kite Club.

01:29:05.580 I've been talking about Kite Club for so long, longer than anybody else.

01:29:09.880 So great.

01:29:11.240 Hi, sweetheart. 0.94

01:29:12.920 Here's a deal. 1.00

01:29:14.180 Anyone who doesn't listen to Kite Club is a dodgy bloody wanker. 0.99

01:29:18.160 Do you know what I mean? 0.99

01:29:19.680 Hi, I'll take a quarter pounder with cheese and a McFlurry.

01:29:23.260 Sorry, sir, but our ice cream machine is broken.

01:29:25.340 Oh, no.

01:29:27.640 I think Tom Hanks just butt-dialed me.

01:29:30.020 Anyway, first rule of Kite Club is, tell everyone about Kite Club.

01:29:34.200 Second rule of Kite Club is, tell everyone about Kite Club.

01:29:38.140 Third rule, like and subscribe wherever you listen to podcasts, or watch us on YouTube, yeah?

01:29:44.220 And yes, don't worry, my Brad Pitt impression will get better.

This Past Weekend with Theo Von - August 15, 2019

Sebastian Maniscalco 2 ｜ This Past Weekend #223

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