Tower Gang - September 28, 2023Ep 144 - The Plight of the Beep
Episode Stats
Length
1 hour and 59 minutes
Words per Minute
212.55994
Hate Speech Sentences
211
Summary
Toad, Jose, Cole, and Toplops are back with a new episode of Tower Gang, and it's a doosey one. We talk about a lot of things, but the main topic of discussion this week is Cole's new relationship with his ex-wife, Liz.
Transcript
00:00:17.000
So I can only fit a third of my dick into Toad's...
00:00:22.000
You wanna kill me or you wanna give me a bone? I don't know.
00:00:31.000
Have you guys ever had the mythical where there's a whole thing in and then do that shit where they're like...
00:00:53.000
Donald Trump, you come on Tower Gang. That is why.
00:01:18.000
It's 925 because Toad started and stopped the stream and I apologize to all our fans that probably aren't even in here yet.
00:01:25.000
But thank you for finding us once you finally straggle your way in here.
00:01:33.000
Top left we got Toad, the man who is our producer and is not getting paid for at least two and a half years because of his mistake this evening.
00:01:43.000
We got Fat Comic Dave, AKA Cole, who is always in the gym.
00:01:47.000
And then bottom right we got Top Lops, the host of TopLops.com.
00:01:53.000
Yeah, it's like the Top Lobster show but we're calling it the Nephilim Death Squad.
00:02:03.000
I didn't know if you started a new show or what.
00:02:10.000
Or is this like maybe we're a show, maybe we're not.
00:02:13.000
Did you see his dick last week and you decided that you wanted to partner up with him?
00:02:16.000
Me and Raven are just feeling each other out a little bit here.
00:02:22.000
I felt him out with my fucking back of my throat last week.
00:02:30.000
Just so that he would have like basically like he doesn't want to be blackmailed by his dick being out there.
00:02:36.000
Do you take his podcast show name or do you take his podcast show name?
00:02:42.000
I have to send Raven my dick because he sent me his?
00:02:45.000
Has that ever happened yet where two podcasters that have different shows got married and then had to choose between their podcasts?
00:02:54.000
I mean, I know it's gonna happen like it's just that is bound to like to be a problem in our future society.
00:03:02.000
Why can't they just both continue their own podcast?
00:03:11.000
When Liz finally divorces Cole, she's gonna she's gonna take him for half a tower gang or half of his share of tower gang.
00:03:19.000
She's gonna own one-tenth of tower gang or something like that.
00:03:24.000
Oh my god, we'll have to get Cole's whore ex-wife for the final deciding vote to oust him out of the corporation.
00:03:51.000
And so now you're a whore because I don't like you anymore because you're no longer my friend's wife.
00:03:57.000
Anytime anyone breaks up with another woman that she immediately becomes a whore at that exact moment.
00:04:03.000
Even if it's the guy who cheated, she's still a whore.
00:04:08.000
If Clint was out there just putting his dick in every piece of snatch he could find, they're all whores.
00:04:17.000
That is my dog barking for no goddamn fucking reason.
00:04:22.000
He like scratched to come in my room and now he's just barking at the TV in here.
00:04:33.000
I'm getting all fucking roided out and raged up.
00:04:41.000
I need my balls to be like drained and it's not happening.
00:04:46.000
Speaking of balls, I got to see toads this week.
00:04:53.000
I feel like we have to open with the most, you know, the hottest breaking news.
00:05:15.000
I have it cropped right above the dick if you want to show it.
00:05:24.000
Can we put it through one of those anime filters?
00:05:35.000
Is that his dick does look exactly like his actual head.
00:05:39.000
If you look at him, it is almost a one for one.
00:05:53.000
Yeah, you smacked it around a little bit, right?
00:06:23.000
My dick right now isn't as long as his dick right now.
00:06:33.000
Just as Raven was immediately post-beat, so was Toad.
00:06:38.000
No one sends a fucking dick pic unless they're immediately post-beat.
00:06:55.000
It was like, you could see the shiny skin on it.
00:06:57.000
It was like, I was like, oh, that shit's stretched out.
00:07:02.000
It was the light reflecting off of my bald dick.
00:07:09.000
Isn't it crazy that that incredible body has never been on top of a woman?
00:07:14.000
Can you take it down just for sanity and also the show's sake, just in case?
00:07:24.000
I was like, your sister, you've been on top of her multiple times probably.
00:07:39.000
Why is Jose taking this pathological liar's side?
00:07:41.000
I honestly didn't have a bummer in that I barely remember.
00:07:55.000
No, my dick curves like upward and kind of like to the left.
00:08:11.000
And he tried to play it off like we have a new submission.
00:08:33.000
So guys, again, people that are in this, whatever, this YouTube right here, they were wondering
00:08:42.000
If you're wondering, press one, two, three in the chat.
00:08:45.000
And then I pop on for a couple of seconds and say, oh, whatever.
00:08:50.000
In the group chat, Rayto's like, we're getting to it.
00:08:55.000
In the group chat, we decided to fuck with Toad again.
00:09:18.000
The funny thing about Toad is like, the autism is 100% real.
00:09:25.000
And like, it was so funny because I was, and the whole time I'm like fucking with him
00:09:29.000
because I know it's really like messing with his head.
00:09:31.000
Like he was just like, no, we, are we, he said, are we doing a Wednesday show or not?
00:09:45.000
I, I, I was like, they're, they're kicking me off the show.
00:09:50.000
He was, he was like, yeah, he thought this was going to be a whole new thing that he,
00:10:00.000
Uh, he was like, I'm a co-founder of this show.
00:10:08.000
He was like, that's what, why is top taking over the show?
00:10:13.000
He said, he said that you show lack of commitment and shit like that.
00:10:20.000
He said, he says, he says, I'm the only one with the backbone to stand up to top.
00:10:25.000
And then I, and then I said, while we're all, we're all like conspiring together.
00:10:35.000
And then I sent you motherfuckers my dick just to lay it down.
00:10:38.000
I just threw my dick right on the, no, that's not why you sent it.
00:10:49.000
I created a, a, a whole show for yesterday, just to fuck with Toad, a whole stream.
00:10:55.000
So Toad could see, we had never had plans to do this.
00:11:03.000
Where he's just, he's like, I'm walking through the streets in Boston.
00:11:05.000
I just yelled at a hooker, like saying crazy shit.
00:11:08.000
Like you gotta say, by the way, Toad left our chat and I want to, this was one of the
00:11:18.000
And so what had happened is, and this will, we'll tell you, Dave Smith's coming back on
00:11:28.000
Well, actually I think I like, it was like, you know what, it'd be funny to add this in
00:11:32.000
So I was like, you know, I want to message Dave.
00:11:37.000
And then I sent the, the, the, like a screenshot, like showing I messaged him or whatever.
00:11:41.000
And I was like, you know, or something like that.
00:11:43.000
And I was like, Hey, Dave, you know, we should have him on soon or whatever.
00:11:50.000
We were, we were saying Dave was on with us yesterday.
00:11:52.000
There was a one little bit, like another little, like the piece of hay that broke the
00:12:02.000
And then I said in the other group chat, the talk behind it was like, I should tell
00:12:08.000
I was like, I didn't even need to tell him that he was coming on.
00:12:09.000
We were like, we should have him on on Tuesday night.
00:12:13.000
I lied because I was on vacation with my family.
00:12:16.000
I couldn't even made it, but I just like, was going along and being like, Oh no, I'm getting
00:12:20.000
We're going to, you know, I'll totally go and make it.
00:12:27.000
That's what's so, that's what's so remarkable about you is like, it doesn't matter how many times
00:12:43.000
Like it's such a silly thing to get upset about.
00:12:46.000
And we're just like, and every time he runs fake.
00:12:59.000
I don't have, I don't have any electricity in my house right now.
00:13:07.000
I do not have enough melanin to not hear that shit.
00:13:23.000
I don't think he knows what we're talking about.
00:13:30.000
It could have been, it could have been, it could have been Cole's dog though.
00:13:34.000
Dude, that video, that video that you cut in for our intro was so fucking good, dude.
00:13:37.000
He's like, it was like in between a, a scream and a boop.
00:13:45.000
It's just because like, I'll scroll like, and I sent y'all a video of it.
00:13:49.000
Um, like anytime I see a black person video of a, just like them out.
00:13:53.000
It literally is every time if they're at their house, it's beeping.
00:13:58.000
Every there was, it doesn't matter the, um, the wealth level or anything.
00:14:01.000
Like there was, it was essential one and it was this guy.
00:14:05.000
So he brought it and it was like a nice house and it was like a nice looking black girl.
00:14:09.000
And the dude sounded like a, it was her birthday and he wrapped her shit.
00:14:19.000
So he put it in fucking an actual gift wrapping.
00:14:21.000
Like it was, and you hear a beep in the background.
00:14:25.000
Right when they opened the door, you hear beep.
00:14:27.000
And then like, like 30 seconds and you hear another beep.
00:14:35.000
It's just the fucking videos you see, but it is, it's a funny racist trope.
00:14:39.000
I don't, it's almost, I dude, I've seen so many videos and it's every one that I've seen.
00:14:47.000
We actually, we actually plotted this shit, which is really cool.
00:14:51.000
Cause I feel like every month or so we're doing something viral.
00:15:02.000
Someone, someone's got a beep in their motherfucking house.
00:15:15.000
Jose looks like, you know, Jose can't reach the, he can't reach the fire alarms.
00:15:19.000
But the funny thing is I've actually had periods in my life where I have struggled with the beep.
00:15:24.000
But like, I'm not at that current period of time in my life.
00:15:27.000
So I can sympathize with the plight of the beep.
00:15:34.000
That needs to be an autobiography of some fucking, like the plight of the beep.
00:15:40.000
It's, it's, it sounds like a, it sounds like a composition by Rimsky Korsakoff.
00:15:44.000
Top, top, top, play, play this video so you can explain the, what we did.
00:15:50.000
So I, I, uh, I just want to say this real quick.
00:15:56.000
Ain't no fucking way in the world y'all can vote for Donald Trump when he come back up
00:16:00.000
If it is, if y'all do vote for him, y'all such stupid motherfuckers.
00:16:31.000
And someone's, someone's running a bit or they became black.
00:16:40.000
I'm going to leave for like 10 minutes or whatever.
00:16:42.000
However, but if it's someone fuck with you, it's just going to resume when you get back.
00:16:48.000
So if it keeps going with like, all right, I'm leaving for like two minutes and then let me
00:16:53.000
because then no, because then I can't, I can't put any audio in.
00:17:06.000
He's going to be gone for about full five beep.
00:17:29.000
Are we going to do the gravelly thing all the time while he reads it?
00:17:34.000
You know, it feels good chanting with you guys.
00:17:37.000
Phil dog says, uh, Jesus, I can't even read it.
00:18:03.000
Because I was, I was thinking, I was like, oh, maybe Top's running it from behind.
00:18:10.000
Dude, it is not me unless, I, I've had issues with a carbon, uh, monoxide detector.
00:18:18.000
You have your headphones on, so you're not hearing it, so it could be totally in your
00:18:31.000
This is what Liz do, and this is really good if she did.
00:18:33.000
She, she was like, just curled up on the couch.
00:18:35.000
What did she get, like, go and take the fucking thing out of the-
00:18:37.000
She probably, you probably use the phone, the beep on her phone.
00:18:45.000
Dude, this is, uh, this is, this is like the beep bluff.
00:18:48.000
Like, somebody is intentionally doing it, and everybody's saying they're not.
00:18:54.000
Whoever's doing this to us is killing me right now.
00:19:01.000
Phil Dogg says Elon Musk's long game with SpaceX is to event-
00:19:11.000
Alright, is Elon's long game to show us space is fake and we can't go to the
00:19:23.000
It destroys the creed and it's race-related, so, I mean-
00:19:30.000
What if, what if, what if a black dude's hiding under one of our beds and that's why
00:19:36.000
Dude, a black guy tried to break into my house.
00:19:41.000
Holy shit, a black dude's fucking Elizabeth right now.
00:19:53.000
Eric July is giving Cole's wife the business right now.
00:20:07.000
Yo, I can't believe that a black dude is in one of our houses right now.
00:20:15.000
Phil Dog asks if Elon Musk's SpaceX long game is to eventually prove that space is fake.
00:20:21.000
Let's go to our resident Flat Earth specialist, Top.
00:20:47.000
Basically, is Elon Musk long game for space instead?
00:21:28.000
Yo, if it's Toad, there's not even a possibility of it being a prank.
00:21:33.000
He just has a black dude that's living with him now.
00:21:55.000
You are banished to behind the scenes producer.
00:22:22.000
The fucked up part is we can't see each other's mutes because we took it off.
00:22:25.000
So they literally could just see someone who lied along the way.
00:22:39.000
It's only been happening for 20 minutes and I'm already ready to commit a felony or go
00:22:55.000
There's some higher power here because this is not planned at all.
00:23:00.000
Wait, is somebody gaslighting Toad out of us and didn't inform the rest of us?
00:23:05.000
If anyone was going to do it, it would have been Top and Top actually left the stream.
00:23:14.000
Alright Toad, can you at least do us a favor and go away for a bit and be behind scenes
00:23:22.000
Although the problem is if it's someone fuck with you, they could just stop.
00:23:29.000
You think I want to leave the show because coincidentally I have a smoke detector going
00:23:42.000
Because it seems like it's beeping every minute or something.
00:23:58.000
Because if it is gay, he's already sent shit up there.
00:24:02.000
Like he could have proved it already if it's gay.
00:24:33.000
This kind of fucked me because I literally was planning this on you.
00:24:35.000
Because I was like, I bet you we could hit up Top's mom or his wife...
00:24:40.000
That's why I was like, oh, y'all did it already.
00:25:01.000
What if just the battery just died right before we started just coincidentally?
00:25:16.000
What's crazy is like he's legitimately too short to do anything about it and he probably
00:25:20.000
doesn't have enough upper body strength to even like raise his arms to change it.
00:25:28.000
He's got old lady knobs that spins him from the...
00:25:35.000
Don't come back yet because I'm setting something up.
00:25:53.000
We could have been talking for minutes and then it beeps.
00:25:55.000
Or we could have been talking for 13 seconds and then it beeps again.
00:26:02.000
It was happening every 45 seconds or something.
00:26:18.000
He would go under it and then if he got caught...
00:26:32.000
I have a smoke detector in this room and two like behind me like out in that hall there.
00:26:37.000
None of them beeped that entire time I was gone.
00:26:44.000
There were no beeps in my house while I was gone.
00:26:57.000
Guys, what's happened is he's already tuned it out.
00:27:00.000
This was going on for a week now and he's already tuned it out.
00:27:05.000
Oh shit, it's my small percentage North African.
00:27:21.000
I pressed his keyboard, so maybe it's a keyboard.
00:27:28.000
I've only heard it when I've had my headphones on.
00:27:38.000
Mark Vestibule, fuck this guy, says Toad is clearly not a software engineer or whatever
00:27:52.000
His inability to use some of the most basic and intuitive features on his computer when
00:27:58.000
Top could use a computer to do more than just make art.
00:28:02.000
I love how Toad is trying to say it quicker than the beep hit.
00:28:05.000
Cole could use his engineering skills to fix his car, toilet, etc.
00:28:09.000
Well, to do anything despite being a software engineer because that's not his job.
00:28:15.000
That's why he has no basic computer skills to carry over to everyday life.
00:28:18.000
Mark Vestibule, suck my scrumdiddly umptious cock is all I have to say to you, sir.
00:28:26.000
He was giving you an out and you're going to tell him to suck your dick?
00:28:32.000
I'm a pretty skilled one and I don't know how to use Instagram.
00:28:48.000
I don't know if I want to end the bit yet because I really like it.
00:28:51.000
Someone is doing a bit and I know who it is and I think it's really fucking funny and
00:29:10.000
Because it's great and I want to be able to do the show because for the next hour because
00:29:18.000
if this keeps going on, I'm not going to be able to do it.
00:29:46.000
Alright, so what it was is if y'all go to Brand and then scroll down, there's something
00:29:57.000
It's a background music that's every 30 seconds.
00:30:12.000
This is what I wanted to do, but I fucking love this show so much that I'm like, I'm coming
00:30:19.000
And that's what started the whole insanity that made Toad send his dick.
00:31:00.000
This is how good Top Lobster is at what he does.
00:31:03.000
We were conspiring to do this to Top, and he did it to us before we could do it.
00:31:14.000
And this is why I said, we record when Big Jay Oakerson says we do, and Top Lobster is
00:31:27.000
And I was just like, he's gotta be turning this thing on and off.
00:31:31.000
And then I was like, is there a background music you can do?
00:31:40.000
I was looking through the brand stuff, and I was like, yeah, Moon Crickets, that makes
00:31:47.000
What should have been the signal that he was doing it was that when he left the stream
00:31:52.000
to prove it wasn't him, because he didn't have to do that.
00:31:54.000
The rest of us all muted, but he left the stream.
00:32:08.000
He could leave it playing while the stream was going, holy shit.
00:32:38.000
I will say, Raven, Swans, Crow, whatever, way better.
00:32:45.000
Like that tentacle dick, whereas Toad's like, that's a dick, dog.
00:32:57.000
Toad did also send another picture, unwarranted, that he also didn't have to send, of him touching
00:33:02.000
his dick to his belly button, which is still also refuting that.
00:33:08.000
Well, okay, to be fair, if you do this move and you kind of pinch, you could do it soft
00:33:20.000
I will give Toad's dick like a solid, like just how Jose said, I'm going to give it like
00:33:47.000
Like I want some calamari before I eat like a full like fish.
00:33:52.000
Like I just want something, you know, that I can just handle.
00:33:56.000
Like it's enough to fill you up, but it won't make you stuffed.
00:34:03.000
Like I was down here on expectations just because of all the shit he's been telling us.
00:34:09.000
Oh, I assumed his dick was going to be a disaster.
00:34:11.000
When I was three, I jerk off 32 times a day, you know.
00:34:24.000
If you subscribe to the locals at a $25 a month level.
00:34:52.000
I thought it was going to be super tiny and like three inches straight to the left.
00:35:04.000
I was expecting a bend to like left and then right at the end he goes boop and it boops
00:35:12.000
I expected like a U-turn but you thought it would be like a fucking broken arrow.
00:35:33.000
I didn't realize after looking at his little...
00:35:47.000
Well, it's weird that my body fits the description of both of the nukes that were dropped on his
00:36:24.000
He's like, yo, yo, you want to fight Ryan Dawson?
00:36:52.000
After he sent his dick, I did demand that he send the belly button picture.
00:37:06.000
Toad keeps fucking bragging about his belly button dick.
00:37:13.000
If I stand straight up, that's like an extra fucking three inches that drags my belly button.
00:37:40.000
The thing is, Clint just doesn't want to believe the reality of the situation.
00:37:45.000
Dude, your dick when it was fucking down and hard is like not close to your fucking bibit, bro.
00:37:50.000
You ain't stretching that thing to your fucking belly button unless you fucking hunt.
00:37:58.000
Yo, a bibit's a cute thing for a fucking belly button.
00:38:08.000
Oh, I thought you were like something you put in a belly button.
00:38:13.000
Oh, I was thinking you were talking about that woman who cut her husband's dick off.
00:38:30.000
You know it's not small because an Asian pediatrician was very impressed by it.
00:38:41.000
Because I got the notification and I was like, I don't know.
00:38:45.000
And I just immediately closed it and burst out laughing.
00:39:00.000
I thought about the psychology behind him sending it and only Clint responding saying,
00:39:11.000
So I was like, imagine, imagine sending a dick pic to like, just to your homies and
00:39:20.000
It was, it was, it was, it was moon crickets even when he stopped.
00:39:34.000
And then I, then when it finally did start people's.
00:39:36.000
And so I clicked on it and I'm in the gym and all of a sudden there's Toad's dick.
00:39:39.000
I'm in the middle of the gym and it happened like three times.
00:39:56.000
On Clint's phone in the gallery, there's a picture of Toad with his hard dick.
00:39:59.000
And then another picture right next to it of just Toad's hard dick.
00:40:16.000
Dude, your dick has fucking crinkles in it when it's not hard.
00:40:21.000
Crinkles on the upswing, whereas Ravens looked like it was coming down.
00:40:25.000
But they were both still at like, probably 50 to 70% hardness.
00:40:34.000
I've fucking, I've put 50 of them in my face before.
00:41:00.000
I just pull it the fuck off and it touches my belly button.
00:41:08.000
Your wiener can't even sniff your bibit, homeboy.
00:41:11.000
I'm trying to find, I'm trying to score up and see the picture now to make sure it wasn't
00:41:22.000
I do have the cropped picture of just his dick in my phone.
00:41:25.000
And every time I've sent a tweet today, it pops up and I'm like, I just want to attach
00:41:39.000
I have this lengthy rant about the government and it's just like, toad's dick.
00:41:47.000
Just whenever you say anything anti-government, just throw my dick on it.
00:41:50.000
I think that that's really funny that you could show...
00:41:53.000
Technically, we could show Joe Rogan your dick.
00:42:06.000
And then later, be like, oh shit, I took a nap.
00:42:23.000
But no, for real though, Clint, that is like, not kidding.
00:43:13.000
I have a thirst for dick and I'm getting parched.
00:43:26.000
If you fucking submit your dick, there's a really good chance that we will send it to
00:43:30.000
So you better fucking send your dicks right away.
00:43:35.000
You're going to have to beat Toad or Raven to get your dick shown to Dave Smith because
00:43:43.000
So right now, Toad's going up against Raven and if Toad loses, his dick's going to be
00:43:49.000
And we're not going to be able to talk to him anymore.
00:43:56.000
You exceed expectations, but not well-exceed expectations.
00:44:18.000
Like, Toad, you wouldn't even understand how big my balls are.
00:44:22.000
You'd just sit staring at your phone confused as a motherfucker.
00:44:37.000
I wanted to bring up help anyways because I wanted to talk about the thing
00:44:40.000
that was making Toad also autism out in our chat.
00:44:44.000
Real quick, I'll let you finish, but I want to remind people what there is to win with
00:44:50.000
We are offering an interview if you're willing to dick-dox yourself, but you're winning the
00:44:55.000
We're literally congratulating you on having a sweet dick.
00:44:57.000
And I believe Top has agreed something along the lines of doing a drawing.
00:45:08.000
And on the shirt it will say, Tower Gang Scrumdiddlyumptious Dick of the Year.
00:45:16.000
And then we'll be able to show an artistic rendering of your dick on the show as well.
00:45:20.000
So we can bring you on, discuss the dick, and look at it in its animated glory.
00:45:26.000
I do have one thing to add that wasn't in the dick pics we've gotten so far.
00:45:31.000
Hold something up that we can use as reference.
00:45:36.000
Like in Toad's case, he could have used a AA battery to prevent the alarm from going off.
00:45:55.000
I want to talk about this political compass thing because it's been coming up.
00:46:01.000
How you guys tried to ruin my motherfucking career this morning?
00:46:13.000
Oh, that is such a fucking crazy statement, Doug.
00:46:18.000
That light brown solidarity is not coming in right now.
00:46:21.000
The problem here is that the expectation was so low.
00:46:26.000
We're all sitting here almost complimenting Toad's dick.
00:46:37.000
I think that that dick could create an orgasm for a woman.
00:46:42.000
And I never would have thought I could have said that.
00:46:48.000
Yeah, that's what I was saying when I said that.
00:46:55.000
I was like, dude, you got a dick that could probably get an orgasm going for a chick.
00:47:16.000
You have a fucking totally functional dick, it appears.
00:47:21.000
It doesn't even sniff your belly line, motherfucker.
00:47:24.000
The body's all fucked up, and then the head on top of it's kind of weird looking.
00:47:29.000
Yeah, I mean, you got like Fat Man Little Boy, but then you got a dick.
00:47:34.000
You guys are saying my best physical attribute is my dick.
00:47:41.000
Like, the only thing about you that's not just totally disgusting is your dick.
00:47:45.000
The best part of Toad is his dick, and he doesn't use it.
00:48:07.000
I think, honest to God, I think if you saw a dude's butthole in front of you, you just-
00:48:16.000
Like, I need the right woman to actually pull it out.
00:48:20.000
According to these rules, where we're doing one versus one, winner moves on to the next one,
00:48:26.000
part of me also wants to vote Toad because I want to show Dave Smith Toad's dick and I
00:48:33.000
That's three weeks of having to bend over backwards with mental gymnastics to keep his dick in the running.
00:48:42.000
Toad's dick is passed through to the finals automatically, as far as I'm concerned.
00:48:46.000
Even though it doesn't sniff his bibit, but I still think it goes to the finals.
00:48:58.000
Your dick doesn't sniff the bibit, but it's still a fucking thing.
00:49:08.000
I literally, standing here just a second ago, I brought it to my belly button, bent over,
00:49:14.000
easy, cleared it, like leaped some bounds over, stood up, not even close to my belly button.
00:49:31.000
And be like, oh, yeah, and just honorable mention, here you go.
00:49:35.000
We've already rated this, but just for your pleasure.
00:49:37.000
Hey, let's just nix the competition and just send Toad's dick to Dave Smith.
00:49:46.000
This actually would be a great troll to fuck with him.
00:49:49.000
Be like, all right, this is the cream of the crop.
00:49:56.000
And then show that one first just to fuck with him.
00:50:08.000
He was like, Dave, this is what you have to go up against.
00:50:11.000
You just have to give us your dick so we can see it.
00:50:14.000
And then he just throws down his fucking hammer.
00:50:16.000
If you imagine telling Dave Smith you've got to beat this dick.
00:50:46.000
If your dick showed up on the Joe Rogan experience?
00:50:49.000
That would be the kind of troll that would show up there.
00:51:01.000
He was like a tortoise or whatever his name is.
00:51:19.000
The only people who would know that would be in on the joke would be the fucking fans.
00:51:50.000
I like the chart because you freaked out about it.
00:52:09.000
Technically, you and Luke were in the smart side.
00:52:28.000
Like, you know, everyone's like, who's this dumb motherfucker?
00:52:30.000
And then he says some shit, and you're like, oh, okay, I guess he does know some shit.
00:52:44.000
It originated with our show ones, and then someone started doing those.
00:52:58.000
I mean, it made me giggle, but I don't really care to fucking talk about it on the show.
00:53:27.000
What's funny is, like, this guy, I don't think he knows who we are at all.
00:53:41.000
I'm saying he knows who you are, but not through like-
00:53:50.000
I do want to just say, like, I think he got it right on, like, the third time around,
00:54:06.000
He literally does the Jose effect, where it's like, he sounds retarded, but then sometimes
00:54:11.000
I say shit and be like, oh shit, this guy actually reads some stuff and knows some things?
00:54:27.000
I mean, this is tower gang, though, so in a way, don't we, like, all sound dumb, but
00:54:45.000
Sounds smart is dumb, and he was very upset about this.
00:54:55.000
And they had Jose in the Luke Rakowski of sounds dumb is smart, and he was like, I should
00:55:04.000
And then the funniest part is whenever Toad gets, like this is like his defense mechanism,
00:55:11.000
It happens with both betting, it happens with like intellectual sides.
00:55:21.000
And I go, Toad, I have the same credentials as you have.
00:55:22.000
He goes, I was a valedictorian in my high school, you fucking idiot, you ingrates.
00:55:25.000
I was in all advanced classes in my junior and senior year.
00:55:29.000
I go, Toad, I have the same credentials as you.
00:55:34.000
Real quick, I do have to say, in reference to the last chart we were just on, Toad makes
00:55:40.000
sense for the bottom right in the same way that Tim Pool makes sense for the bottom right.
00:55:45.000
I actually think Tim Pool is a very smart guy, but I do think he's, in a lot of ways,
00:55:54.000
And I don't, honestly, I'll be honest, I don't think he's great at political philosophy,
00:55:59.000
But yeah, so in the same way that Toad might be in the bottom right is in the same way that
00:56:04.000
someone could put Tim or put, yeah, Tim on there.
00:56:07.000
Well, I think I'm like academically smart and I have like good recall and shit, but I'm stupid
00:56:13.000
Yeah, like when you talk, when you talk, it just makes me angry.
00:56:16.000
It doesn't make me feel like I'm being educated.
00:56:21.000
But like, if they cleaned up the genetics a little.
00:56:26.000
Come to think about it, you kind of do look like, like Tim Pool.
00:56:30.000
Yeah, he puts on a B&A, he'll stress you out a little bit.
00:56:39.000
I played a moderately attractive human being and that way you could get through that hurdle
00:56:43.000
and then you could like weaponize your autism with that, you know?
00:56:54.000
And honestly, I think he posted another one and I think it's even, it's the most accurate
00:56:58.000
is that it switches Top with Toad and it puts where Top is at now with Clint.
00:57:06.000
And I was like, I think that's the fucking best.
00:57:08.000
It's because like, at that point it gets all of us...
00:57:15.000
Cole, why are you not even defending yourself that you sound dumb or dumb?
00:57:24.000
Yeah, I'm okay with being put in the top and I'm also okay with being sound smart is dumb.
00:57:32.000
I think this one is the most accurate and like, because Toad is completely...
00:57:36.000
I don't know, average isn't correct, but like he...
00:57:43.000
It's just aesthetically pleasing because he's got his hands up perfectly like this in the middle
00:57:47.000
and it's just like, that's where he should be, you know?
00:57:49.000
This is where my dick should be too, so it all makes sense.
00:58:08.000
I'm a weird conundrum because I am really short, but I'm also really thick.
00:58:12.000
But then I feel like my voice isn't like a very masculine voice either.
00:58:28.000
Like, if we could just put the dicks in little squares like this here.
00:58:38.000
But like, is big and then looks big are two different things.
00:58:46.000
And have Toad put the dicks anywhere on this chart that he thinks that that goes.
00:59:05.000
Do you want to start with the one we saw first or start with the actual beginning of the story?
00:59:22.000
The only time Cole does deep dives is when he sees a viral racist story.
00:59:26.000
And he's like, I got to get to the bottom of this.
00:59:29.000
Also, I do want to celebrate that we saw the year anniversary of the time that the Indians went against the blacks on Twitter about George Floyd.
00:59:39.000
And it was still one of the best moments ever in Twitter history.
00:59:52.000
It's like the best in the way that Joe Rogan is the biggest podcast.
00:59:58.000
Like, in the way that we are, like, the largest militarized nation.
01:00:02.000
Yeah, it's like us, and then, like, tens of millions of people, and then, like, the next one.
01:00:12.000
The Indians versus the blacks was my favorite World Series.
01:00:17.000
We should just DM Dave Smith from the Tower Gang account with Toad's dick and just say,
01:00:34.000
Yo, that was the most insulting part about Toad sending it in the DM, is that he, like,
01:00:37.000
kind of coyishly pretended like it wasn't his, and is like, nigga, I know that's your dick.
01:00:42.000
Like, that's obviously your fucking little fat man little boy body.
01:00:56.000
I wanted it to include your face so I could fucking dick dox you to 100,000 people.
01:01:09.000
Whatever, but it's better than anyone would have expected.
01:01:32.000
That's basically what 90% of the show has been for the past year, so...
01:01:38.000
Because I'm competitive and I wanted to compete against Raven.
01:01:54.000
This is how much of a fucking delusional lunatic this guy is.
01:02:00.000
He's trying to cook the books for the dick bits.
01:02:10.000
Dude, I bet all my money on the Baltimore Raven, man.
01:02:14.000
It's like, whenever a girl is like, I don't really want to fuck you, and he's like,
01:02:23.000
I guarantee you that Lainey blows Toad's dick out of the water.
01:02:28.000
I have four of my closest male friends tell me in confidence that that was a nice, solid
01:02:40.000
Ask not what you can do for the gang, but what your dick can do for...
01:02:47.000
Because I'm from Boston, and I will send my penis to the moon, and this, that, and the
01:02:58.000
I feel like he was trying to establish dominance over us.
01:03:03.000
Actually, it is gonna work because Clint absolutely refused to send his dick.
01:03:11.000
So, technically, Toad did fucking mog you on this.
01:03:19.000
I genuinely find it sad you would not send your friends a bitch to your dick.
01:03:23.000
And it made me cry a little inside when I told you this.
01:03:26.000
And you said, I've never sent one to my friends.
01:03:33.000
You've never had a close female friend, and you're like, haha, that was my dick.
01:03:40.000
I want that award, man, right next to, like, High School Perfect Attendance, and whatever, and,
01:03:44.000
Chess Club Winner, whatever I have, and then it's most scrumdedly umptious penis.
01:04:18.000
But because Toad has sent it, we have to go with the one that is the objective truth
01:04:24.000
Look, you're not going to fucking mind fuck me into sending my dick to you guys.
01:04:33.000
Cole's using reverse psychology to get clint to show his dick.
01:04:38.000
He talks a big dick game, but I ain't seen no goddamn dick.
01:04:54.000
Maybe that's why he got so defensive when we were talking about taking an inch off his
01:05:01.000
I hear you don't send dick pics to chicks, and I'm like, you know what?
01:05:06.000
When you're like, don't send them to your boys.
01:05:16.000
None of my guy friends have sent me their dicks either.
01:05:19.000
You're the first group of fucking guy friends that I've ever had that are just like, here's
01:05:26.000
My cousin's dick one time, I opened up the bathroom door, and my cousin, I swear to God,
01:05:33.000
But he was like, like a fucking bird, and he had his dick up like this, and he's shaving
01:05:40.000
And I was like, that was the first time I've seen his dick.
01:06:11.000
When you want to see your cousin shaving his testicles for no apparent reason while he's
01:06:15.000
perched up on his chair cacawing at you, you gotta use Nadeau.
01:06:27.000
When I want to mog the homies with a dick pic and throw that right down, I want to look
01:06:37.000
And then throw that dick pic right in the chair.
01:06:38.000
If you have a borderline average dick like Toad, you gotta use Nadeau.
01:06:46.000
What was sad is that Toad wasn't completely bald like one of Jose's cats.
01:06:52.000
I was hoping you'd pull down and it looked like Cornstar dick.
01:07:06.000
Because you didn't just take it and send it to us.
01:07:15.000
That's the one he sends to Poppy and all these other dumb bitches.
01:07:46.000
Can we please get into the black people stealing phones?
01:07:49.000
I used it the other day to shave my neck and it literally didn't feel...
01:07:53.000
We ran out of shaving cream and I was like, I gotta shave my neck.
01:07:57.000
So I used Nadeau and it literally didn't feel like a thing.
01:08:10.000
It's so weird that Josie just watched this for an hour while we talked about Toad's dick.
01:08:20.000
It was younger dick because I was younger in that picture.
01:08:23.000
My wife was asking me, she was like, what are you laughing about?
01:08:26.000
And I was like, Toad just sent us a picture of his dick.
01:08:35.000
She actually said no, but I was willing to show her.
01:08:46.000
Have you guys ever asked your chicks about back in their before days?
01:08:49.000
Oh, I always ask every girlfriend if I'm the biggest they've been with and they always
01:08:58.000
I asked my wife, I know you've probably gotten so many unsolicited dick pics in your
01:09:06.000
If that happened to me, there would be an album just to be funny.
01:09:11.000
And be like, look at all these dits of random people.
01:09:22.000
But do you keep all the nudes of all the girls that have sent them to you?
01:09:29.000
I had them for like half way through the marriage somewhere.
01:09:32.000
It's on like my Yahoo email or something like that from fucking 30 years ago.
01:09:36.000
Yeah, I think there's an old email that if I remember the password I probably...
01:09:45.000
This is what, because every time I hear like there's like a leak, they're like...
01:09:48.000
Like some guy will be like, they searched his emails and they found all this shit.
01:09:52.000
I'm like, who the fuck is sending like sex messages over email?
01:09:55.000
Oh, what I would do is I'd send them from my phone to my email to save them as a backup.
01:10:04.000
Before you put them up in the cloud, you had to save it to your Yahoo email.
01:10:11.000
Like back in the day, I got them from email and then on AIM.
01:10:18.000
Dude, Top, you look like a nigga that would have a sidekick for real.
01:10:22.000
Top is like a nigga that would have a sidekick.
01:10:24.000
Top the type of nigga that would have a sidekick for real, for real.
01:10:27.000
Yeah, but Top not the type of nigga that would have a Nextel.
01:10:30.000
You know it was like either sidekick or Nextel.
01:10:37.000
Speaking of old phones, how about these more modern phones here?
01:10:40.000
Yeah, let's get back to the thing we've been trying to do.
01:10:46.000
I'll let you finish Cole, but real quick, back to what we were written on.
01:10:52.000
And then this is the first thing I saw on this.
01:10:54.000
And I was just like, why the fuck are they just like, go play the video.
01:10:58.000
Do you know how dumb you have to be to try and fucking shut the people up?
01:11:04.000
And I want to go off working backwards to what actually happened.
01:11:28.000
So the best part is this like, like these iPhones going on.
01:11:32.000
And the first thing I thought I was like, what is going on?
01:11:34.000
Like, why are, like, are they just like for the one time they like set alarms for waking
01:11:39.000
Like, they're like, oh shit, people were actually working.
01:11:48.000
That black people had to be to work and they didn't know what an alarm was?
01:11:50.000
And they were like, ah, I gotta wake up on time.
01:11:56.000
See, I, I, I, I assumed that it was multiple things.
01:12:00.000
I assumed that they had just stolen them, but then that they were beeping and they had
01:12:04.000
to, like, I think I assumed like the correct story basically.
01:12:07.000
Then digging into it, I found out, okay, so what happened is there was a, a rash of
01:12:11.000
fucking, um, like, I, like Apple store break-ins, ceiling birds to pocket birds.
01:12:21.000
In Philadelphia, there was like a bunch of break-ins to Apple stores and they just stole
01:12:25.000
all the fucking, uh, like the floor, like the ones that you can just think of iPhones
01:12:38.000
Yo, this shit just peeping like, nah, it's not like, you, you, you walk around with a ceiling
01:12:51.000
That's the funniest part is that, like, so they, also, so they stole, like, and you can
01:12:56.000
play the other, you can play the other video, the one of, like, actually showing them, uh,
01:13:01.000
Dude, honest to God, this, this chick's narration is, like, as close as I've ever come to being
01:13:07.000
Dude, do you want to read, uh, crass and see in your video?
01:13:21.000
They're breaking into the store, the Apple store.
01:13:57.000
I know, I think they're saying got one as in the store.
01:14:21.000
So, what happens is, if you steal from an Apple store, they already prepared for this.
01:14:32.000
And they work off of Wi-Fi, so once they're off the Wi-Fi, or outside of the range of the
01:14:37.000
Wi-Fi, they immediately just shut down and do this thing where they just ring and, like,
01:14:45.000
So, these fucking idiots thought they could just steal, like, the fucking ones that are just
01:14:52.000
The better part about this is, instead of taking them back, they just destroy them.
01:14:57.000
They just, like, literally, like, they just throw them on the ground, they pour orange juice
01:15:01.000
Or not even taking them back, just leaving them.
01:15:04.000
If you go back to the first video, they said throw them in the sewer.
01:15:13.000
One of the black dudes sprinting by goes, this is how they're tracking us, bro!
01:15:21.000
Plus, these fucking dumbasses are filming themselves, not only stealing, then destroying the property.
01:15:29.000
Well, they don't value property, but they understand being career criminals.
01:15:37.000
But then, because they're filming it, they have to smash the cameras that they're filming
01:15:45.000
They're all documenting their felonies, which I...
01:15:48.000
And it is a felony because each one of these are, like, $1,500.
01:15:53.000
They're over the minimum amount for, like, a misdemeanor or whatever it is.
01:15:56.000
I'll be honest, at risk of something like me, this is worse than January 6th.
01:16:02.000
I legitimately believe that this is worse than January 6th.
01:16:06.000
One of the funniest things is LPNH actually did...
01:16:10.000
But it was actually pretty funny that, like, they've tweeted this about, and they said,
01:16:15.000
None of these people's lives are worth as much as an iPhone.
01:16:19.000
I think they said that iPhones are worth more than these people, is what they said.
01:16:24.000
And then Ryan Lawrence, one of the fucking idiots, was like,
01:16:32.000
Like, yes, if we just make this normal, like, that's just fine.
01:16:39.000
Like, you live in a civilization that just permits complete theft of whatever you want, whenever you want,
01:16:44.000
and you just break it on the ground, and you say,
01:16:56.000
So, about $1,500 for an iPhone or an iPad, depending on how big it is.
01:17:02.000
One of these black people, like, if you had them as a slave...
01:17:13.000
So, wait, we're talking about what their market worth is in the slave trade, right?
01:17:22.000
I think on an open-air slave market, I would probably pay more for the iPhone.
01:17:31.000
We're not thinking about, like, the black market for organs and kidneys and stuff.
01:17:38.000
Once you get into that type of stuff, yeah, it's gonna blow it.
01:18:10.000
And you know, the only black organ that I would potentially want to steal would be the dick, but we've established that I don't need that.
01:18:23.000
I was already trying to go there, and I was already trying to tell you that you should accept a black organ, and it should be the dick, and that's what you should accept.
01:18:35.000
Do you remember when we were on Elijah Toppin, uh, Clinton?
01:18:38.000
Do you remember when on Elijah Schaefer's show, and he did the whole Paris riots thing, and he called them, um...
01:18:44.000
It was so fucking fun, because there was another video, like, just like this, but he was like...
01:19:03.000
You just change the language a little bit, but it's always...
01:19:06.000
In fairness, during the Black Lives Matter riots, there was white people that were jacking shit
01:19:17.000
Instead of got one, they're just shouting, jay un, jay un.
01:19:23.000
One of the funny things I did see is in South Africa, there was a riot at a mall, and they
01:19:28.000
looted every mall store, except their one bookstore that was in the mall, was completely...
01:19:39.000
Dude, unironically, if I was there in this scenario, pure chaos, everyone looting, and
01:19:44.000
I already have everything I need back in my house, I'm totally going to the bookstore.
01:19:49.000
Like, if you go to a bookstore, there are some nice...
01:19:57.000
But, like, there's something nice about, like, the physical bookstore, I'd just be perusing,
01:20:08.000
All these black dudes are just pillaging this fucking iPhone store at Jose's all by himself
01:20:14.000
in this big-ass Barnes & Noble, just like, la la la.
01:20:18.000
He's going over to the coffee shop and he's making himself a coffee so he can walk around
01:20:22.000
and drink coffee while he's, like, picking up books.
01:20:27.000
The black people outside with the phones, like...
01:20:33.000
He was like, these things don't beep, motherfuckers.
01:20:39.000
I also imagine, like, he's also still respectful about it, so he's still, like, he'll pull it out.
01:20:44.000
Instead, like, they just, like, you know, they'll just pull shit off and, like, not care.
01:20:48.000
He actually sees it, like, it's not in alphabetical order and he's like, oh, I gotta change this.
01:20:52.000
Hey, what if you have a really nice car and you just, like, you change the paint to look like text from books?
01:20:58.000
So, like, when you're in the hood, they just stay away from it?
01:21:01.000
Cole, did you say that if you won the Powerball, you would buy a pressure cooker?
01:21:11.000
Like, that's your concept of winning a lot of money?
01:21:16.000
I'm not saying that that's what I think is, like, I'm just saying, like, I just...
01:21:20.000
He's like, if I was a billionaire, I'd get a $50 home appliance.
01:21:29.000
It's just, like, I just, like, I don't see it as a necessary expense.
01:21:35.000
But if I'm a billionaire, I don't have to worry about any expense.
01:21:38.000
Yeah, I mean, that's actually rational thinking.
01:21:42.000
The problem is, that's why all, like, like, all the lottery winners go out.
01:21:53.000
It's like, it's my thinking of just, like, if I want it, I just get it then.
01:21:57.000
Like, so, I would be like, yeah, I want a NASCAR car just so I can just drive it
01:22:02.000
and just, like, have one just sitting out and like...
01:22:07.000
But no, your thinking isn't, like, what would get you poor.
01:22:11.000
Just like, I'd just get, you know, things that I'd like.
01:22:14.000
Like, I saw yesterday that someone said they had two dishwashers.
01:22:20.000
Like, so you can have sex with two at one time.
01:22:29.000
And what they said was they just, instead of actually putting your dishes away,
01:22:35.000
And so, like, one day you just pull them out of there, and then use it, put it in the
01:22:38.000
other one, wash, and then just use the ones, and just keep switching back and forth.
01:22:41.000
The only things that I want if I were to win the lottery, like, I have a decent amount of money,
01:22:45.000
but, like, the things that I would really get, though, would be an RV, like a fucking
01:22:55.000
And then a house on the ocean, probably somewhere in Florida, because I can't fuck with California
01:23:02.000
I feel like you can fuck with California once you're rich.
01:23:13.000
We're going to get a fucking hurricane every year, dude.
01:23:17.000
See, I feel like at a certain level of richness, you can fucking move back to California
01:23:24.000
and be like, it doesn't fucking matter anymore.
01:23:31.000
I just didn't want to live there anymore, because it was fucked up.
01:23:33.000
If you get locked down, it doesn't matter how fucking wealthy you are.
01:23:43.000
Yeah, but you still have the best place in the world to live at, like, just as in general,
01:23:46.000
like, just, like, the, how amazing looking, like, just, if you're caring about, like,
01:23:51.000
the, if you're wanting something on the water, you're wanting it because of how it looks
01:23:55.000
Not necessarily for all the fucking, like, you just want to be viable.
01:23:58.000
But you don't want to live there, so you don't want to live there.
01:24:01.000
Do you want to pull it back to the last minute of the city?
01:24:04.000
I don't even know what happens in this video, but the rest of it.
01:24:43.000
If you pour orange juice on it, it'll stop beeping.
01:24:52.400
The funny thing is they think it's just the Apple store,
01:24:54.960
so they just go on to the next one and do it again.
01:24:56.840
And it's like, if everyone was going on, maybe we'll go to the next one.
01:25:00.880
My favorite commentary on this today was Olivia Rondeau,
01:25:16.800
because I've been making crazy-ass jokes like Cole just made.
01:25:22.580
You guys are all overtly, brutally racist at this point.
01:25:38.300
and then after a while they're like, this is uncomfortable
01:26:17.420
I'm not going to believe a man who won't put his dick on the line.
01:26:29.960
Hey, why do you guys all scoff when I get a state-of-the-art RV?
01:26:36.180
like, this is just funny because it is the goals.
01:26:39.920
No, this is like someone who's already made money.
01:26:42.640
They're like, if I just came upon another large chunk of change,
01:26:48.940
Maybe a nice place in the mountains, you know, summer home.
01:27:08.000
Clint probably literally could probably pack, like, a large bag
01:27:14.300
The funny thing is, Clint could literally buy an RV right now.
01:27:28.880
but the reason he doesn't is because he's, like, very cheap.
01:27:31.860
Like, we were talking about the whole AI clip thing
01:27:39.220
Because we said that we would crowdsource the funding
01:27:49.000
I think he just knows he's not going to win the lotto,
01:27:52.640
But it's also that I want to do it, like, on my own terms.
01:27:55.900
I think he was coddled by his mother as a child,
01:28:50.260
That's disturbing to not be able to use your mouth.
01:29:38.640
That's why he's always talking about breastfeeding.
01:29:43.800
Dude, you were breastfed till, like, eight, weren't you?
01:30:12.340
Hey, Toad, what do you want to fuck you on, though?
01:31:46.340
One of the most famous black movies of all time
01:38:14.840
What's weird is her tits look like where she pulls it out from.
01:38:19.300
It's like she just has an eight-foot-long plank of tit.
01:38:35.180
Once they get your shirt mask, they just become long pancakes.
01:38:40.700
But it's weird because they look voluptuous, but they're not.
01:38:44.780
Here, scroll back to whenever she pulls it out because you can see it very well.
01:39:10.060
It looks like she could literally flip them up over her shoulder like a Continental Soldier
01:39:21.460
Here, go to when she goes to the second tip because her shirt is so large.
01:40:02.520
They smell like if you've been standing inside a McDonald's for too long.
01:40:06.780
I don't know how you got that so quick, but that's exactly what they smell like.
01:40:11.240
I feel like, you know how black people complain that we smell like wet dog?
01:40:13.880
I feel like that's where they're getting it from.
01:40:22.340
It's all the black bitches mad because they're fucking Andre over there playing fat white
01:40:32.040
So we know Butthead is number one of these three ladies, right?
01:40:34.900
You know how crazy it is that she has a severe cranial break in her head and we're like 100%
01:40:56.320
All the Tower Gang people in the chat, this is what you do.
01:40:58.280
You have a brand new baby, get a headband, a nice little Nike one, and then you get a
01:41:03.740
And you put the pencil right there on your kid's head, put the headband on, and just leave
01:41:11.000
So who are you choosing between the got this black lady and the-
01:41:21.100
I also have one more video, and it was the video I was talking about earlier about the
01:41:38.060
You're obviously taking the white chick over the fat black chick, right?
01:42:07.740
I would fuck this chick over any of those three, though, probably.
01:42:12.280
Well, you're going to go with the chick that's known for cheating.
01:42:22.320
You been cheating on me with a dude named Hubert, I be damned.
01:42:26.920
I love that he's more upset that the dude's name was Hubert.
01:42:38.400
He was caught this bitch cheating with a Hubert.
01:42:52.220
Cheating Girl first, then Butthead, then Waterton.
01:42:57.960
If you're putting her number one, you're retarded.
01:43:35.700
I listened to that Big J joke about this is not happening, about where he had the gangbang
01:43:44.400
She's a regular four, but she's a gangbang eight.
01:43:46.840
And I think the same thing happens with threesome.
01:43:48.600
She's like a threesome eight, but she's like a regular five.
01:43:55.000
If you are gangbanging a girl with multiple guys, she plummets in rating.
01:44:13.720
It drops her in the sense of if she's a four, but she does gangbangs, she is a two.
01:44:19.520
But in the girls that do actually get gangbanged, she could be an eight.
01:44:30.280
I didn't notice that that chick had a butthead at all until we played it the second time.
01:44:44.940
He's like, when I look at people's faces, I only look from here to here.
01:44:49.280
I mean, I don't look at the first time I saw it.
01:44:53.940
The first time I watched it, it did take me probably halfway to almost end the video
01:45:00.120
And then when I realized, I was kind of like, oh, not that big.
01:45:09.100
It's funny, but it's like, she's still very pretty, and it's really only like a mild deformity.
01:45:14.180
Yeah, do you want to know what I was actually thinking?
01:45:17.700
Like, a mild deformity is the fucking mole that Toad has on his shoulder.
01:45:25.220
What I expected was that she would spin, and she would be like at Auschwitz.
01:45:29.900
This is like when the Down Syndrome people see each other, and they don't see each other as down-
01:45:35.380
or an autistic person doesn't see another Down Syndrome person.
01:45:52.520
Dude, how crazy would that be if they were just like-
01:45:55.160
I don't want to go to school with all these buttheads, mom.
01:46:02.060
Wait, it was a really autistic guy dating a Down Syndrome girl.
01:46:08.740
Like, he didn't notice that she was Down Syndrome.
01:46:18.000
Star Trek character, though, on that, it honestly does kind of look like she's like some sort
01:46:32.720
I think it's some bland chicken and some broccoli for the white girl.
01:46:37.720
For the black girl, the fat black girl, you're probably getting like-
01:46:45.440
The cheater girlfriend, I don't think she cooks.
01:46:54.840
And that fat bitch makes some good food, you know.
01:46:58.300
What's fascinating about that video is that I can't-
01:47:02.360
Like, I would be so enraged, there's no way I could wrap her shit, you know?
01:47:06.420
Like, you would actually, like, be like, I'm gonna wrap-
01:47:08.700
Yo, this fucking bitch, when she get home, I swear to fucking God, bro.
01:47:14.040
There's two different levels of anger, because I think this is the level of anger of, like,
01:47:18.180
one where you just throw out, like, your girlfriend or your boyfriend cheats on you,
01:47:22.520
and you just throw their, like, shit out into the yard.
01:47:25.760
There's a second level of anger, where you're just like, fuck you, and you pack up their shit.
01:47:30.140
You're like, I'm so fucking done with you, I just want you out.
01:47:33.260
I don't want you to be on my lawn picking up your shit.
01:47:40.060
He's like, I'm putting this bitch on blast on social media.
01:47:42.340
Yeah, he, like, folded it, wrapped it, and then filmed it.
01:47:48.840
You do it on her birthday, you put it in packaging like that?
01:47:52.600
I think he was really mad, though, because he should have let her open it.
01:47:56.520
Yeah, he was like, take your shit, get out of here.
01:48:09.420
He should have put, like, the gift tags on it, too.
01:48:14.620
If your girl was fucking another dude, what's the worst name you could think of?
01:48:31.780
I feel like, I feel like Butthead, I could palm her head.
01:48:35.440
Because she's got, like, the little groove there.
01:48:48.000
I could do it to a pack of wolves, but I don't know if I could do it to her.
01:48:49.920
If I fucked a Gilbert, I would be pretty mad if she fucked a Gilbert.
01:48:56.700
I didn't even realize what we're talking about.
01:49:03.000
Yeah, your girl's fucking somebody else, and you're like,
01:49:17.200
Hubert is up there, dude, because that's, like, a crazy name.
01:49:23.480
He's like, you fucking knew the name of Hubert?
01:49:29.400
Like, dude, shit's in the street and, like, smells like shit.
01:49:33.360
You're just making up Indian names, because you can't think a single Indian name.
01:50:07.440
If it's a guy with a girl name, that's really bad.
01:50:10.480
Or, like, some, like, super fucking bougie dude named, like, Bedminster or something.
01:50:20.400
Why are you texting this motherfucking name Bedminster?
01:50:23.740
Or, yeah, or, like, any of those, like, rich, white, progressive names.
01:50:34.720
We're determining pretty much any name would trigger...
01:50:38.360
No, but if you have any name other than our own.
01:50:41.920
Like, if she was fucked a Kyle, I'd be like, alright, whatever, Kyle.
01:50:45.320
I'd still hate Kyle, but it wouldn't be, like, offensive.
01:50:48.220
Yeah, it would be like, oh, like, if you fuck somebody that's, like, is, like, a Sean wouldn't be bad.
01:50:57.240
I was waiting for you to identify exactly what you were doing there.
01:51:02.360
Yeah, if you're fucking a Jaquan, you're out of here.
01:51:04.920
If I did hear a Jaquan, though, I would understand.
01:51:11.960
I need you to Google number eight Colorado University football player.
01:51:22.140
A Shador, I mean, like, Shador would be pretty bad.
01:51:27.620
But, yo, this name for number eight on that team is wild.
01:51:31.100
Now, top, I would be like, oh, you fucking a rapper behind my back?
01:51:52.920
Yo, I heard it said audibly, and I immediately grabbed my phone and looked it up because I
01:52:46.580
Do you think that's better than Kool-Aid McEntry?
01:52:50.780
I think Cavuassier Smoke wins because Smoke is, like, such a crazy name.
01:52:55.760
There was a guy that played at Auburn that was last – his name was Smoke as well.
01:53:00.240
That sounds like a cool bad guy in a comic book.
01:53:12.140
Cavuassier Smoke, I think, is his fucking actual –
01:53:15.060
The guy in Alabama is actually – his actual name is Kool-Aid.
01:53:24.040
Yeah, can you imagine naming your child Kool-Aid?
01:53:34.020
And I was like, well, it all started back, you know, my ancestors.
01:53:36.220
They put them on a boat, and they bought them over here.
01:53:38.620
What about when Alabama had Ha Ha Clinton Dicks?
01:53:44.120
I love that dude because he's got my name, so respect for Ha Ha.
01:53:49.160
One of the worst ones – this is one of the worst ones I've ever heard of.
01:54:05.560
Ha Ha is the only time, and any of us will be seeing Clinton Dicks.
01:54:09.400
I think I've seen – I think I've said this before, but I worked in a school a long time ago,
01:54:13.400
and on the desk, there was a name called – it was L and had a dash and an A.
01:54:24.580
And I was on, like, the kindergarten desk, and I was like, what the fuck does that say?
01:54:32.880
Well, everybody, if all these black names have made you suicidal,
01:54:38.320
make sure you go pick up a razor at NadeauShaveCo.com, promo code TOWERGANG.
01:54:47.300
I guess I was just going to do our plugs for us.
01:54:53.740
Go to his merch store and fucking get that shit out there.
01:55:20.140
I'm probably, like, every day going to upload a new, some of my old shit.
01:55:28.340
Say, go send Toad your dicks at TOWERGANG underscore Toad.
01:55:36.460
We're going to try to get some more people, too.
01:55:37.740
Maybe I can get, like, Shane Cashman for some spooky shit.
01:55:40.680
His connection always seems kind of iffy, though.
01:55:44.160
If you want us to send your dick unsolicited to Dave Smith.
01:55:49.640
Assuming that Top's meme today didn't get me uninvited, I will be at the TimCast live event
01:56:02.220
I'll be there with Luke, Tim, and Ian, all three of them, and they'll be like, oh, yeah.
01:56:30.980
Donald Trump Jr., he needs to tell me, is this my dick presidential or not?
01:56:38.320
Listen, Nephilim Death Squad just did another episode with Matthew Reif,
01:56:53.580
I forgot to mention, had on Sargon of Akkad on the show with Luke.
01:56:59.260
Did 130,000 views on Rumble, which is fucking amazing.
01:57:05.220
And then Friday, I have Ashley St. Clair on Liberty Lockdown.
01:57:25.080
If you have a meaty, meaty clit, then maybe we would consider it a nicest lady dick.
01:57:41.940
I'm doing a couple episodes tonight, probably up until 4 a.m. again.
01:57:54.960
Toad, Toad, you take joy in being sleep-deprived, and you don't need to do that to yourself.
01:58:28.680
Tower Gang, Tower Gang, Tower Gang, Tower Gang.
01:58:42.220
Tower Gang, Tower Gang, Tower Gang, Tower Gang.
01:58:44.180
Tower Gang, Tower Gang, Tower Gang, Tower Gang.
01:59:00.860
Tower Gang, Tower Gang, Tower Gang, Tower Gang.
01:59:05.760
Tower Gang, Tower Gang, Tower Gang, Tower Gang.
01:59:10.360
It's so fucking hard to line up to syllables and all that.