Tower Gang - July 14, 2022


Ep 79 - Warrior Technology w⧸ Tyler Janke


Episode Stats

Length

1 hour and 30 minutes

Words per Minute

204.80258

Word Count

18,627

Sentence Count

2,111

Misogynist Sentences

125

Hate Speech Sentences

214


Summary

Toad of Nothing and Cole join us to talk about 9/11, buttholes, and how much dried semen you have in your butthole. Also, we talk about how much semen you can have in a shower.


Transcript

00:00:00.000 What's up, retards?
00:00:02.700 The funniest 9-11 jokes were written on 9-12.
00:00:05.140 Women jerk off dicks like fucking they're unruly ferrets.
00:00:07.960 Yeah.
00:00:08.720 You ever had a 9-11 cocktail?
00:00:11.700 It's in Manhattan with two kamikazes.
00:00:13.640 Come in now.
00:00:15.740 You see, the socialists don't have an accurate answer for this,
00:00:19.040 and she needs to account for it.
00:00:20.720 White women must be stopped.
00:00:22.740 That's right.
00:00:23.800 Yeah.
00:00:25.900 We can stay horny and retarded longer than she can stay sane.
00:00:30.000 What?
00:00:30.400 Your ass-to-penis ratio.
00:00:33.020 Ben, maybe you could say we had sex, but we didn't fuck.
00:00:35.440 You said nigger.
00:00:36.360 Oh, Jesus.
00:00:37.680 Free!
00:00:39.340 Fat Dave, fuck you, man.
00:00:41.100 Free!
00:00:41.460 Free!
00:00:43.460 Hey, it's Jose Gali-Song.
00:00:46.900 You're watching Tower Power Hour.
00:00:48.920 If you're here with us today and you're one of our fans,
00:00:51.540 you are a towerist.
00:00:52.480 If not, you're a nigger fag.
00:00:54.360 Oh, Jesus.
00:00:55.560 We have Toad of fucking the not...
00:00:59.020 You know what?
00:00:59.400 It's the OGs today.
00:01:00.320 We got Toad and Cole.
00:01:01.220 We got some other people to roll in later.
00:01:02.780 We're supposed to have Jenny Trill or Lenny Chills or Benny Hill.
00:01:07.420 Benny Hill.
00:01:08.300 Yeah.
00:01:08.540 I keep forgetting it.
00:01:09.700 I don't know why.
00:01:10.620 His name is just in my head.
00:01:11.760 I keep changing from Lenny, Benny.
00:01:13.920 You know, Benny Hill is like 1920s comedy shit.
00:01:17.940 His hat blows off down the street.
00:01:20.340 Every time I saw a video, I was like, oh, it's me.
00:01:22.760 And yes, by the way, I am back.
00:01:24.380 I was out for two weeks for internet problems and then moving.
00:01:28.600 And so I was at my parents' house.
00:01:31.340 And they were like, no, you can just join in at your parents'.
00:01:33.940 I was like, they usually go to church on Wednesdays.
00:01:37.380 That's not...
00:01:37.620 Trying to get these demons out.
00:01:41.300 Yes.
00:01:41.700 They can be at church while you're on here calling everybody a faggot.
00:01:44.840 And all that.
00:01:45.200 Yeah.
00:01:45.640 And saying, talking about buttholes and how we like to suck dick.
00:01:50.680 Yeah.
00:01:51.080 That's what I want to hear.
00:01:51.720 Clint and Reed are both at Freedom Fest.
00:01:54.600 So we haven't been able to get them in here.
00:01:56.280 Top always rolls in late.
00:01:58.020 I think we might get Tyler here in a little bit.
00:02:00.880 But yeah, Benny had, I guess, some scheduling issues.
00:02:03.960 I think he did the old, oops, I thought it was another week type thing.
00:02:07.140 Which, if anyone has been in the game for a minute, it happens.
00:02:09.680 You know, it is what it is.
00:02:10.480 You know, don't make a habit of it, you know, people.
00:02:13.220 But it happens every now and then.
00:02:14.760 You've got to be understandable.
00:02:15.960 So we're cool with it.
00:02:16.820 I mean, luckily this show isn't a show that's super guest heavy.
00:02:19.900 Although the bulk of whatever success we have is probably relying on guests.
00:02:23.520 But, you know, whatever.
00:02:25.420 But yeah, they're gone.
00:02:27.740 We'll make it work.
00:02:28.620 Right now we've got the OG crew.
00:02:30.880 The originals.
00:02:32.360 The ones stuck around.
00:02:33.800 You were about to be like, we have Toad here tonight.
00:02:36.460 Toad of nothing?
00:02:38.860 Yeah.
00:02:39.340 Yeah.
00:02:40.500 I'm carrying this bitch today.
00:02:42.220 You know what, actually, I'm just going to fuck around, dude.
00:02:44.180 You being gone, Cole, really made us realize that you were the glue that held this shit together.
00:02:48.000 I didn't watch the video because I never watch our podcast.
00:02:52.220 But I was wondering how bad they must be.
00:02:55.120 Because I'm like, it's not like having a collegiate skanks, whatever.
00:03:01.560 Not whenever Jay's not there.
00:03:02.900 Because Jay's definitely the funniest.
00:03:04.520 But whenever Lewis isn't there, it's definitely a weird fucking vibe.
00:03:08.000 Even though Lewis isn't the funniest.
00:03:09.800 He's not the fucking best.
00:03:10.520 Dave is completely expendable in that show.
00:03:12.540 Oh, yes.
00:03:12.860 Dave and Dave.
00:03:13.780 Oh, they go without Dave all the time.
00:03:15.320 It's nothing, dude.
00:03:16.180 Well, yeah.
00:03:17.420 I mean, Dave has gone soft since he's become a father.
00:03:20.740 So they don't really need him anymore.
00:03:21.800 But Cole, you are the dried semen that holds our buttholes together.
00:03:25.700 So that's what it is.
00:03:27.020 Oh, how much, actually, how much dried semen do you have to, like, how much cum you have to have to actually seal a butthole, though?
00:03:32.640 It must be a good amount of cum.
00:03:34.680 And you let it well in there for a while.
00:03:36.280 Yeah, you have to, like, you would have to, I feel like, because, well, you know, what you should do, pour hot water on it.
00:03:42.920 I don't know if you ever jerked off in the shower.
00:03:45.160 But, like, that hot water hit, and the shit gets sticky as fuck.
00:03:49.420 Isn't me or, like, jerking off the shower not that great, though?
00:03:52.040 Like, it's great for, like, cleanup.
00:03:53.740 Yeah.
00:03:53.900 But, like, I don't know what it is.
00:03:54.780 Something about the water running over my dick.
00:03:56.560 It's like a weird lube that I don't like.
00:03:58.680 Like, I don't know.
00:03:59.560 Are you doing it dry in the shower?
00:04:01.780 Yeah.
00:04:02.000 What are you doing?
00:04:02.700 You bringing lotion in the shower?
00:04:04.320 You know what?
00:04:05.960 Here's something for everybody out there.
00:04:07.540 No, no, no.
00:04:08.300 This is a pro gamer tip.
00:04:10.080 All right?
00:04:10.780 This is for everybody out there.
00:04:12.020 It's going to change your life.
00:04:13.120 It's going to change your life.
00:04:14.840 The hot water on the dick feels great.
00:04:16.560 I'll say that.
00:04:17.160 Shaving cream.
00:04:18.820 Oh, yeah.
00:04:19.380 For sure.
00:04:19.800 Shaving cream works wonders, dude.
00:04:22.280 It is amazing.
00:04:23.220 It is, like, and your dick feels great afterwards.
00:04:25.540 Because, like, usually they're moisturizing.
00:04:27.880 And so, like, and they don't, because they lather, and they're supposed to stay lathered up, it doesn't go away the entire time.
00:04:33.580 It's not like, everybody else needs lotion, but lotion, you have to constantly get more lotion.
00:04:37.580 Eddie Grimm said conditioner.
00:04:38.840 I've been there.
00:04:39.580 Yeah, that's a smart move.
00:04:40.800 I always just forget about it.
00:04:42.300 The problem with the conditioner, though, is it runs out.
00:04:44.660 That's what I'm saying.
00:04:45.580 That's like shaving cream.
00:04:46.960 You don't have to use a lot, and it foams up, and it's great.
00:04:50.280 I use conditioner as shaving cream in the shower.
00:04:52.440 Did anyone else do that move?
00:04:53.860 No.
00:04:54.120 See, I know what Cole's talking about, because I have a hairy dick, and I have to shave it.
00:04:59.340 Like, even, like, with a manual razor, I've got to shave the rest of the dick.
00:05:01.860 Wait, wait, you're shaving your dick?
00:05:03.000 You're not getting any pussy, dude.
00:05:04.300 Why are you shaving your dick?
00:05:05.440 Yeah.
00:05:06.180 What are you talking about?
00:05:07.380 So, no, and they really like it when it, like, starts growing back a little bit, because then my dick turns into, like, a barbed dildo.
00:05:13.140 Dude, this reminds me.
00:05:14.460 Like, it was great in my mind.
00:05:16.620 I don't know why, but somehow the topic, I don't know how it came up when I was a kid.
00:05:20.540 I was probably 11, 12.
00:05:21.880 Somehow the topic of that came up, and I don't know, like, my family somehow knew I did, or I alluded to it, or something.
00:05:27.380 I don't know.
00:05:27.580 Maybe somebody walked in on the shower.
00:05:29.000 Yeah, you shaved your...
00:05:29.480 Yeah, and my mom's like, why are you doing that?
00:05:31.500 Who's looking at your wiener?
00:05:34.800 You are, mom.
00:05:36.960 I was like, it just looks better, okay?
00:05:40.220 Well, then you shave it now.
00:05:41.360 You shave it now.
00:05:41.980 Are you bald down there?
00:05:43.000 Yeah, I shave that shit.
00:05:43.820 I mean, it's weird not to.
00:05:45.000 Oh, okay.
00:05:45.520 Oh.
00:05:46.620 I mean, I've gone away sloppier about it.
00:05:48.780 Like, I'll go, like, a week without shaving.
00:05:50.360 I'll get a little built up.
00:05:52.240 Like, back in my...
00:05:53.600 Before I got married, like, that shit would, like, every other day, shave that shit.
00:05:56.760 Like, I had to be ready for game time all the time.
00:05:59.140 Dude, the worst thing...
00:06:00.360 I had a friend in college.
00:06:02.440 You grow a bush dog?
00:06:04.120 Yeah.
00:06:05.120 Why?
00:06:05.580 Dude, that feels awful.
00:06:06.940 It feels disgusting.
00:06:08.040 See, I keep it trimmed.
00:06:09.880 Like, you can't have a full...
00:06:11.800 You can't have a full Italian bush, and you can't be, like, shaved all the way down.
00:06:16.120 You must have very soft hair.
00:06:17.860 Because the last time I had a bush was in basic training, and, like, because you didn't really
00:06:22.560 get a chance.
00:06:23.180 It was, like, the last thing on your thought.
00:06:24.400 But I just remember by the end, I'd be like, this shit is so fucking gross.
00:06:27.560 Feels awful.
00:06:28.580 Rubbing on my pants and shit.
00:06:29.880 So, by the end, when I shaved, I was like, oh, God, that feels so good.
00:06:33.640 I feel like if I ever do shave, I always get so much, like, not razor burn, but the, like,
00:06:41.540 friction burns, like, in between my thighs, because there's no hair there.
00:06:45.820 And, like, that's what keeps me nice and...
00:06:48.260 Like, because I don't feel like putting baby power up my ass every fucking day just to...
00:06:53.120 What?
00:06:53.780 Wait, why would you need a baby powder up your ass?
00:06:55.860 Oh, no, no, no.
00:06:56.640 I get what you're saying.
00:06:57.640 Like, once you shave...
00:06:58.640 You have a clean-shaven butthole, like, you get, like...
00:07:02.580 You don't shave the butthole.
00:07:03.760 You don't...
00:07:04.040 No, no, no.
00:07:04.440 I'm talking about, like, at least, like, we're, like, in between, like, the, like, like...
00:07:09.260 Yeah, whip your dick out, dog.
00:07:12.160 No, so you get...
00:07:13.300 No, like...
00:07:13.960 Odyssey's cool with it.
00:07:14.780 Yeah, when you shave your butthole, you get, like, real swamp-ass, dude.
00:07:19.120 It gets real, real sweaty in there.
00:07:21.920 And when it grows back, it's the worst.
00:07:23.440 It is just, like, a cheese grater is what your ass has become, you know?
00:07:26.380 Well, yeah, it's a butthole iron-made.
00:07:27.880 That's the thing is, I've heard most, though, it's kind of, like, it's just...
00:07:30.700 Especially, like, if the women are shaved, like, it's just, like...
00:07:35.100 It's basically, like, little, like, needles just scratching them, basically, every pump.
00:07:39.880 Dude, you get acupuncture while you fuck.
00:07:43.200 Dude, do you actually get blowies with a bush, though?
00:07:46.780 I don't get blowies.
00:07:47.700 I'm married.
00:07:48.500 Oh, you for real?
00:07:49.600 That's...
00:07:50.240 I mean, you're too early in the relationship to be saying that.
00:07:52.780 That's kind of sad, dude.
00:07:53.620 Yeah, that's not...
00:07:54.440 Oh, we've had this discussion before.
00:07:56.020 I remember.
00:07:56.720 Oh, I can't cum.
00:07:58.140 Yeah, just tell an unruly old lady, but...
00:08:00.160 I've never cum from a blowjob before.
00:08:04.080 It's so hard to cum when there's no areolas to get me going.
00:08:09.880 She's pregnant, so she must have them now, I think.
00:08:11.820 I need those pepperoni slices, right?
00:08:13.800 Comment.
00:08:15.580 You put actual pepperoni slices on there just so you have the visual.
00:08:20.080 Someone asked, who do we think is the biggest taint?
00:08:22.240 And the reason...
00:08:22.760 And you know what?
00:08:23.280 I believe that was a Rogan thing.
00:08:25.060 They said, like, the one people who have higher testosterone tend to have larger taints.
00:08:28.840 And the taint size has been reduced over the years.
00:08:32.880 Yeah.
00:08:33.100 Like, we have the smallest taints ever now.
00:08:35.520 So, wait.
00:08:36.520 So, this is, like...
00:08:37.540 This is different from the dick-to-ass ratio.
00:08:39.620 Now you're measuring what's between the dick and the ass.
00:08:41.980 Yes.
00:08:42.320 And the larger the taint, technically, the more man you are, basically.
00:08:46.520 So, it's the taint-to-manliness ratio?
00:08:50.960 I mean, I don't...
00:08:51.860 That would be...
00:08:53.060 The taint-to-manliness ratio would be a direct, like, comparison.
00:08:58.500 It would be direct relation.
00:09:00.460 Very strong correlation.
00:09:01.680 Yeah, it's direct.
00:09:03.300 It's just basically the bigger the taint, the bigger the man.
00:09:06.000 Like, it's not a ratio.
00:09:07.280 It's like, if you look at the line for, like, civil rights and then abortion, you know?
00:09:13.080 No, it's a ratio.
00:09:15.040 They're directly proportionate as opposed to indirectly.
00:09:19.160 Like, civil rights and crime.
00:09:21.160 Civil rights and abortion.
00:09:22.920 Civil rights.
00:09:23.560 Like, there's so many lines.
00:09:26.540 Single mothers.
00:09:28.340 It's just...
00:09:28.780 Everything goes up.
00:09:30.180 It's crazy.
00:09:30.500 Welfare state, going from reputable black men to niggers.
00:09:37.120 God.
00:09:38.680 I do think...
00:09:39.680 I bet Jose has a nice, wide, like, long taint.
00:09:44.820 It's really hard to compare.
00:09:46.460 Because it's not like I've ever been, like...
00:09:48.140 Like, put my taint up another day and be like,
00:09:50.420 how big's your taint?
00:09:51.720 How big's your taint?
00:09:52.380 Like, I don't know if it's my big taint.
00:09:54.460 It's at the, like, the base of the balls, too.
00:09:57.440 Oh, I get what a taint is.
00:09:58.520 I'm just saying, like, I don't have any frame of reference.
00:10:01.180 I'm clarifying.
00:10:01.200 I'm clarifying for myself.
00:10:02.540 Because, like, it would have to be, like...
00:10:05.540 And that it is to the middle of the butthole?
00:10:08.800 Like, the actual opening of the butthole?
00:10:10.680 Or to just the outside of the little brown star there?
00:10:16.260 Yeah, where does the butthole begin?
00:10:17.360 The outer label.
00:10:17.920 Like, where they kind of start to wrinkle up, you know?
00:10:20.180 Yeah, that's what I'm saying.
00:10:21.220 Where's the butthole begin?
00:10:21.680 Where's it literally the chasm?
00:10:22.740 Yeah, it's actually the point at which the thing goes, whoop, like that, you know?
00:10:29.380 Yeah.
00:10:29.920 Well, now, what if you have a loose butthole from taking a lot of dick in there?
00:10:33.420 Like, does that affect how big your taint is?
00:10:35.780 Because the butthole kind of starts creeping more into the taint?
00:10:39.240 Also, do trainees have, like, no taint?
00:10:41.980 Whoa.
00:10:43.780 Would trainees have no taint?
00:10:45.320 Because they, like, get their...
00:10:46.540 If they get their dick and balls chopped off,
00:10:48.820 like, it just kind of...
00:10:49.540 Wouldn't that kind of change the length there?
00:10:52.740 I don't know.
00:10:53.560 Let's ask Tyler Yonke.
00:10:55.660 Tyler, what's up?
00:10:56.880 What's up?
00:10:57.780 Yo, you're an old-timer.
00:10:59.200 I'm curious.
00:11:00.000 Do you have a bush or not?
00:11:01.000 Are you bush or bald?
00:11:03.960 Oh, you can't hear us.
00:11:05.340 Oh, no.
00:11:06.200 Great content.
00:11:06.700 Right away.
00:11:07.480 Great question.
00:11:09.660 That's a great question.
00:11:10.520 Because I'm assuming...
00:11:11.620 I'm going to make a good assumption here.
00:11:15.220 I bet he's bald.
00:11:16.460 I bet he's bald.
00:11:17.340 And I bet...
00:11:18.020 I bet he makes his wife, like, not completely bald.
00:11:21.460 Oh, no!
00:11:23.240 So, well, Tyler...
00:11:24.920 Tyler is a cyclist, right?
00:11:26.540 So, he's definitely...
00:11:27.420 Oh, yeah, yeah.
00:11:28.100 That's true.
00:11:28.440 He's definitely a faggot.
00:11:29.600 Yeah.
00:11:29.860 And it also means that he's clean-shaven
00:11:31.980 because you're more, like, streamlined that way.
00:11:34.380 So, yeah.
00:11:35.180 And he also...
00:11:35.680 It's definitely a steroids joke.
00:11:36.880 I just can't make it because cycling steroids.
00:11:39.140 So, yeah.
00:11:40.080 But I'm not going to even...
00:11:41.020 Have we ever asked if he actually knew...
00:11:43.580 Lance Armstrong?
00:11:44.640 Lance Armstrong?
00:11:45.560 Because I'm guessing...
00:11:47.440 I don't know how big the cycling community is.
00:11:50.220 Like, you have to, like, cross paths every once in a while.
00:11:53.080 I can't imagine, like, not...
00:11:55.740 That reminds me.
00:11:56.660 Like, I can't tell you how many times, like, as I was military,
00:11:58.880 like, people would be like,
00:11:59.740 Oh, you're in the Air Force?
00:12:00.680 Do you know Bob?
00:12:02.420 What?
00:12:05.360 Yep.
00:12:05.840 I know him.
00:12:06.480 Jose, how much do you like all the...
00:12:10.420 Because I find them all the time.
00:12:11.880 The, like, TikToks or YouTube shorts
00:12:14.300 that are, like, military-based.
00:12:15.900 Especially that guy, Nico Ortiz.
00:12:17.760 I don't know if you know who that is.
00:12:19.680 He does, like, the different branches
00:12:21.360 and he does, like, their reactions to shit.
00:12:23.340 And Air Force.
00:12:23.680 They're pretty funny.
00:12:24.380 I don't really dwell on it.
00:12:25.120 A lot of that stuff's pretty cringe.
00:12:26.460 But, like, there is, like, some funny jokes there
00:12:28.740 and, like, teasing the different branches.
00:12:30.200 There's definitely a little bit of joke there.
00:12:31.900 But it is annoying how obsessed
00:12:33.280 some people get with that shit, but...
00:12:35.020 Oh, okay, yeah.
00:12:35.620 I thought a lot of military people
00:12:37.000 make their whole personality.
00:12:38.180 I'm like, dude, stop.
00:12:39.820 I thought all the military branches...
00:12:40.600 Fuck your army.
00:12:41.380 I'm the Navy all day.
00:12:42.340 Let's go.
00:12:42.960 Oh, fuck army.
00:12:43.720 They're the worst.
00:12:44.160 Like, dude, you just fucking, like...
00:12:45.640 I thought all the military branches...
00:12:48.400 Why?
00:12:49.320 I thought they just all made fun of the Navy
00:12:51.160 for being huge vaggots, so...
00:12:52.700 You with us now, Tyler?
00:12:53.760 Or are you just going to judgmentally look at us?
00:12:54.860 I am.
00:12:55.260 Sorry.
00:12:55.560 I couldn't hear you before.
00:12:56.840 This feels like a booty call.
00:12:58.320 You said someone didn't show.
00:12:59.980 You come down for me.
00:13:01.780 Are you talking about the Coast Guard?
00:13:03.600 The ultimate branch of the military?
00:13:05.620 Yeah.
00:13:05.960 Oh, my God.
00:13:07.000 I don't care.
00:13:07.880 Actually, I did just watch a movie
00:13:09.560 about the Coast Guard,
00:13:10.500 and it was actually really good.
00:13:11.660 I can't remember the name of it, though.
00:13:12.960 It had Ashton Kutcher and...
00:13:15.700 What?
00:13:16.400 Steven Seagal, right?
00:13:17.000 Michael Costner.
00:13:18.300 Yes.
00:13:18.780 Yes.
00:13:19.780 Or Kevin Costner, not Michael Costner.
00:13:21.000 Kevin Costner.
00:13:21.920 You said Michael Costner.
00:13:24.040 His brother.
00:13:25.240 It's his brother.
00:13:26.320 That's the way he learned.
00:13:27.080 Dude, I always hate it whenever we get these, like, military porn movies
00:13:30.500 where, like, you know, they glorify the shit out of it.
00:13:32.660 Because it is, like, you do realize, like, yeah, sure,
00:13:34.680 there's some truth to there.
00:13:36.060 But it's, like, these are dudes who are, like, the top of the top,
00:13:38.920 went through a shitload of training,
00:13:40.520 and it's, like, that is not the everyday experience whatsoever.
00:13:43.940 Like, yeah, the Coast Guard sure has some badasses,
00:13:46.540 but, like, the vast majority of them are just, you know, a joke.
00:13:49.420 But I feel like the Coast Guard is way less worse than any of the other branches
00:13:53.200 because they literally, the biggest thing they do is actually just helping save people.
00:13:57.180 Like, they're basically the firemen.
00:13:59.100 No, no, no, no, no.
00:13:59.960 No, they're mostly busing drugs and shit.
00:14:01.020 Yeah, the Coast Guard buss drugs.
00:14:01.840 No, that's true.
00:14:02.060 Yeah, the Coast Guard buss drugs.
00:14:04.200 Yeah, they're, like, the DEA of the sea.
00:14:06.700 Do you know how many surfers they kill a year?
00:14:09.520 What?
00:14:10.540 A lot.
00:14:10.960 Do you know how many surfers?
00:14:12.380 No, no, no.
00:14:13.060 I was saying, like, really?
00:14:13.880 They actually kill surfers?
00:14:14.860 No, I just thought I would.
00:14:15.780 Oh, I don't know.
00:14:16.340 It would be, like, really crazy if they actually did.
00:14:18.420 We're, like, what are they going to do?
00:14:19.960 Fucking lock us up?
00:14:21.000 We're the government.
00:14:23.560 International waters, baby.
00:14:25.840 Oh, Tyler, we did ask you before because you couldn't hear us.
00:14:28.760 Are you bald, like, down there?
00:14:31.240 No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, down there.
00:14:33.840 Oh, I, oh, yeah.
00:14:35.900 I take care of everything.
00:14:36.300 That doesn't think since cycling days, correct?
00:14:38.140 No, no, that's just, no, that was from the days when I was single.
00:14:41.760 Are you kidding?
00:14:42.740 No.
00:14:43.580 He just likes getting his dick sucked, dog.
00:14:45.000 Well, see, because this is a booty call, we had to ask that question first because if
00:14:50.620 you have a full bush, we won't blow you.
00:14:52.280 Here's the answer to you, right?
00:14:53.760 And I learned this from Howard Stern.
00:14:55.660 Maybe the only thing I ever learned is if you've got all this bush going on, you cut it, suddenly
00:15:00.060 everything appears bigger, right?
00:15:01.860 True.
00:15:02.060 You don't have this mirage, so you're like, hello, I literally just gained how many inches?
00:15:07.620 But when you're married already, what the fuck does it matter?
00:15:12.460 Oh, it still matters.
00:15:13.780 Oh, yeah.
00:15:14.760 It matters.
00:15:15.780 You make me sad, Cole.
00:15:17.060 Dude, Cole, you think your wife wants to, like, rummage around your pube forest to try
00:15:22.760 to find your dick in there?
00:15:23.880 Like, what the fuck?
00:15:25.340 It really goes to, though, being, do you ever have these conversations with your girlfriend
00:15:31.860 or maybe even your wife?
00:15:33.160 It's like, oh, would you love me if I got fat?
00:15:35.100 And I'm like, well, maybe, but I wouldn't be with you.
00:15:37.880 I mean, why don't you get your shit together?
00:15:40.080 So it goes both ways.
00:15:41.580 It goes both ways, right?
00:15:43.420 I told her, I remember this, we had a conversation and I said something about, she was like, what
00:15:48.500 if I got fat when we got married or something like that?
00:15:50.680 It was like when we're dating.
00:15:51.900 And I was like, well, then I would, like, ask you to come to the gym with me.
00:15:55.580 So I was just like, because basically, it just would be like, hey, you're fat and ugly
00:15:59.620 right now.
00:16:00.160 So I'd be like, no, hey, hey, you want to go to the gym?
00:16:03.100 Let's go to the gym.
00:16:03.880 Let's just start, like, hitting up the gym a bit.
00:16:05.940 But, which I feel really bad because she hears this.
00:16:08.540 We just started going back to the gym this week and she's pregnant.
00:16:11.420 So she's, like, a little bit bigger right now.
00:16:12.840 You're worried she's getting a little fat?
00:16:16.760 You know that's the baby, right?
00:16:19.380 Yeah, that's, she was always, she's been like.
00:16:21.380 No fucking excuses, all right?
00:16:23.960 I keep, every time she talks about, like, feeling fat, I go, you know, some women lose weight
00:16:28.480 during pregnancy, right?
00:16:29.520 Like, I say that every time.
00:16:32.500 Have you seen that Olympic runner?
00:16:34.900 She's still fit and everything.
00:16:36.720 Do you know that Serena Williams was six months pregnant and won Wimbledon?
00:16:41.040 So what's your fucking excuse, bitch?
00:16:44.160 Holy shit.
00:16:46.820 Yeah.
00:16:47.600 I'm sleeping on the couch tonight, by the way.
00:16:49.000 I love it.
00:16:50.480 You're in a different area.
00:16:51.640 What's going on?
00:16:52.820 Oh, yeah.
00:16:53.340 I moved to a.
00:16:53.940 Behind you or a vacuum?
00:16:55.320 What is that?
00:16:55.940 No, it's a vacuum.
00:16:57.240 It's a vacuum because this is, this is my, I work from home now.
00:17:00.780 This is my office.
00:17:02.100 I'm in a trailer.
00:17:03.360 I live in a mobile home now.
00:17:04.440 It's pretty baller.
00:17:05.560 Oh, really?
00:17:06.280 We always knew Cole's trailer trash.
00:17:08.620 Should you at least get some land in the move or?
00:17:11.900 No.
00:17:12.800 So you're literally got, have no land and are living in some sort of trailer?
00:17:16.700 Yeah.
00:17:17.380 Okay.
00:17:17.780 Well, that's a.
00:17:19.560 But hey, it's like, it'll be, it'll be either like $0 a month or like 200 bucks a month.
00:17:25.220 So anywhere in between that.
00:17:27.900 So, and it'd basically be like, oh, shit.
00:17:30.860 I'm homeless because it's so cheap.
00:17:33.160 Just about to hit the fan.
00:17:34.960 The economy is going to crash and I'm going to be in a trailer.
00:17:37.580 You put it on some land and put it on there.
00:17:39.100 You live in a trailer house and your lady's pregnant.
00:17:42.500 That's.
00:17:43.440 That's.
00:17:45.480 And you're in Alabama.
00:17:46.340 And it's not mine.
00:17:47.500 So.
00:17:49.000 There you go.
00:17:50.340 Well, as, as we discussed last week, we don't know which one of us is actually the father.
00:17:54.260 So it could be any of us.
00:17:55.940 And Sam Wip on Odyssey.
00:17:57.480 I'm not going to give y'all a tour.
00:17:59.160 And also it was my, I think it was, it was my great grandfather's trailer too.
00:18:03.460 So I'm moving into like a trailer, like old people lived in for like, and they bought it the year I was born.
00:18:08.760 So it was like, it's almost 30 years old.
00:18:11.740 And it's like just old people lived in it the entire time.
00:18:14.940 What's the, what's the, the, the, your, what is it?
00:18:18.300 Trailer house or trailer park or whatever it is.
00:18:21.040 He's like, I'm from California.
00:18:22.220 I don't know what like that poor shit is.
00:18:24.260 Yeah.
00:18:24.840 What's the, the, the, the, the Crips tour, you know, the, the, the MTV Cribs or Crips or whatever it is that I'm really old, but what's the Cribs?
00:18:33.320 Cribs.
00:18:34.380 Cribs?
00:18:35.620 We have the Cribs out here.
00:18:38.400 Somebody turn on one of those like sound makers you play at night, you know, say a background sound.
00:18:42.300 Is that what's going on?
00:18:42.920 Is that what just happened?
00:18:43.540 It's pouring over here.
00:18:44.840 It is pouring.
00:18:45.900 I can't, I can't stop that.
00:18:47.020 What's up, Tyler?
00:18:48.180 Top's going on top.
00:18:49.120 Lower the volume, bro.
00:18:50.800 Dude, you got what I got at earlier.
00:18:52.340 It's hitting hard, isn't it?
00:18:54.020 Yeah.
00:18:54.340 It's crazy.
00:18:55.160 My chickens are fucked out there.
00:18:56.820 It hit me a couple hours ago.
00:18:58.220 It was fucking, it was rough.
00:18:59.580 So, you know.
00:19:00.800 Top, we, we, we started talking about the taint stuff.
00:19:03.300 Uh, so we just got, we just got really just dipped into it about just, you know, who has
00:19:08.060 the biggest taint right now.
00:19:09.440 Yeah.
00:19:09.660 We just got to the edge of the butthole.
00:19:11.760 So, I mean, I feel like it's gotta be read.
00:19:13.340 Well, I know something that did be clarified that was, what is the taint?
00:19:16.800 Is it from, I guess it, we got the base of the balls.
00:19:19.520 That's easy.
00:19:20.520 But does it go to the center of the butthole or the wrinkly outside part of the butthole?
00:19:25.500 That's the, I mean.
00:19:27.020 Now, the taint is clearly between the butthole and the balls.
00:19:31.180 And it does not include the asshole area.
00:19:33.800 And it actually doesn't even include some of the balls.
00:19:35.920 You've got to have.
00:19:36.280 But where does the balls and the taint begin?
00:19:38.620 And where does the butthole and the taint begin?
00:19:40.360 Because, like, you think about the balls.
00:19:41.900 Like, it has, like, that, like, skin that kind of, like, blends into it.
00:19:44.880 You can't go, you can't go there.
00:19:46.780 Or you get a penalty.
00:19:48.760 Tyler, you're a lawyer.
00:19:50.620 Tell us, tell us all about this shit.
00:19:52.020 Yeah, these are the questions that try men's holes.
00:19:55.340 Right.
00:19:56.200 That's the DNZ.
00:19:57.820 And you just don't go there.
00:19:59.040 And mine is exceptionally rough and ready because of all my days of riding on a bike.
00:20:05.120 Holy shit.
00:20:06.580 Oh, wait.
00:20:07.140 So do you have hemorrhoids from that?
00:20:09.620 No.
00:20:10.520 Hemorrhoids.
00:20:11.460 Do you guys get hemorrhoids, though?
00:20:13.380 I do.
00:20:13.800 I had one once.
00:20:16.340 Tyler's got a super chafed taint, though.
00:20:20.040 That's true.
00:20:20.720 I totally just found it.
00:20:22.240 Oh, Top, that was the other thing we asked Tyler.
00:20:24.300 Do you shave bald?
00:20:26.740 Are you bald?
00:20:27.880 My taint or my...
00:20:29.580 Dick and balls, dog.
00:20:30.160 Just dick and balls.
00:20:31.560 Pubes.
00:20:32.560 We all get lazy in the balls if we do.
00:20:34.520 I feel like Top, being a Puerto Rican, does not shave.
00:20:39.060 Oh, I thought you were going to say being a Puerto Rican does shave because he's always
00:20:42.540 using a knife.
00:20:46.180 Oh, yeah.
00:20:46.840 Thank you, A&M.
00:20:47.420 Wait, wait.
00:20:49.560 Do you do the...
00:20:51.420 What was the movie with Paul Hogan?
00:20:54.820 The knife?
00:20:55.540 Do you shave your nuts?
00:20:56.300 Crocodile Dundee.
00:20:57.680 Yeah.
00:20:58.060 That's balling.
00:20:58.500 Well, you got to take your bald skin and stretch it out and then just like...
00:21:02.800 Like you're sharpening on leather.
00:21:04.720 Yeah, you got to straight razor it.
00:21:07.060 It's the only way.
00:21:08.900 Do I shave?
00:21:10.360 Yes, I do shave.
00:21:11.720 Have I shaved?
00:21:13.080 Ask my wife.
00:21:13.840 Probably not.
00:21:14.440 I mean...
00:21:15.320 You don't even know.
00:21:17.400 It's like if I do, I do.
00:21:18.840 All right.
00:21:19.320 I'll tell you a secret.
00:21:20.280 I hope my wife is watching.
00:21:21.560 It's not a secret now.
00:21:22.720 Yeah, it's not a secret.
00:21:23.660 I don't care.
00:21:24.220 So all the 30 people watching.
00:21:26.120 All right.
00:21:26.260 Sometimes I will go secretly shave, right?
00:21:29.820 And then later in the night, you'd be like, what's up?
00:21:32.640 And almost 100% of the time, no pussy.
00:21:38.160 It's this weird mind game of being married.
00:21:39.980 The days when you're like, I'm going to get that pussy at night.
00:21:41.880 Like, that's when you're like, you'd more likely strike out.
00:21:44.160 The ones where you're like, eh, whatever.
00:21:45.360 I'm not getting no pussy.
00:21:46.100 Then she throws it at you, you know?
00:21:47.660 No, but that doesn't just apply to marriage.
00:21:50.640 Except like Tyler.
00:21:51.400 I'm pretty sure Tyler scheduled his pussy nights.
00:21:53.720 Yeah.
00:21:53.920 He definitely...
00:21:54.440 I feel like he schedules his sex times.
00:21:57.320 I'm in a weird position where if I'm in the mood, it happens.
00:22:01.660 What position does he put you in?
00:22:04.160 Up against the wall, usually, with a zipper mask and a gag ball.
00:22:08.160 You're married to Kevin Hobbie?
00:22:09.520 What?
00:22:09.920 Yeah.
00:22:10.080 I don't know.
00:22:12.960 Maybe it's the age difference.
00:22:14.380 So it's usually up to me.
00:22:17.460 Wait.
00:22:18.140 Like, you're just like, hey.
00:22:19.660 You're like, I'm not in the mood.
00:22:20.820 I have a headache, babe.
00:22:21.700 Sorry.
00:22:22.380 I'm a little tired.
00:22:23.240 Work was hard today.
00:22:24.600 I've been riding my bike.
00:22:25.680 I'm low T.
00:22:26.480 I don't know.
00:22:28.080 When did that change?
00:22:29.140 Or has it always been that way for you?
00:22:30.500 So we've only been married 10 years.
00:22:32.640 So it's always been that way.
00:22:35.160 Oh, damn.
00:22:36.220 I think this is the mistake that we've all made.
00:22:38.460 He came into this and he has her expecting that.
00:22:42.340 He's trained her, essentially.
00:22:44.040 Well, he's also, he came in.
00:22:45.420 He was already, he's seasoned.
00:22:48.080 He's like, he's been around a bit.
00:22:50.260 And he came in and was just like.
00:22:51.360 He's got the George Clooney gray hair going on.
00:22:55.320 Oh, yeah.
00:22:55.660 He comes in.
00:22:56.340 He actually has like some weird like fucking like Jose's like commanding officer kind of
00:23:01.320 like look right now with his hair cut.
00:23:03.220 That's basically what he looks like.
00:23:05.080 Jose's got the 80s drift going on there with the hair.
00:23:09.180 I don't know what's going on.
00:23:10.220 He has the, what's his name?
00:23:13.900 Brad Pitt from Fury.
00:23:15.260 Oh, yeah.
00:23:15.860 I'm here for it.
00:23:16.640 I don't care.
00:23:16.960 His is way worse.
00:23:18.020 I thought you were going to say Biff from Back to the Future.
00:23:20.400 That's more like it.
00:23:22.860 A lot of people forget the early days.
00:23:24.280 They weren't there.
00:23:24.800 I had the slick back when I first started and then I shaved it and then now I'm bringing
00:23:28.160 it back.
00:23:29.300 So, yeah.
00:23:29.940 Yeah.
00:23:30.120 Actually, I remember you put that up to a vote in the chat.
00:23:32.380 You're like, it's hot.
00:23:33.100 Should I shave?
00:23:33.880 And they're like, yeah.
00:23:36.660 Yeah, it was going to be ridiculous.
00:23:37.840 That was peak pandemic.
00:23:38.940 And I was like, I'm going to garden.
00:23:40.060 I'm ready for the collapse.
00:23:40.920 I don't need, I don't need to be dealing with this gay ass hair.
00:23:42.900 And now it's like, here I am.
00:23:45.060 I'm back to, you know, normal life to some extent.
00:23:47.340 So I got to fucking bring it back.
00:23:49.160 You know what?
00:23:49.480 Me too.
00:23:49.780 I'm growing my hair like, like a normal person.
00:23:52.240 This is a long machine.
00:23:52.840 How curly does it get top?
00:23:54.800 You saw my son?
00:23:56.200 Oh, yeah.
00:23:56.580 Yeah.
00:23:57.440 Yeah.
00:23:57.840 Like that.
00:23:58.840 You're shit like naturally jerry curls basically, doesn't it?
00:24:02.200 Yeah.
00:24:02.680 Yeah.
00:24:03.520 Once it gets a little long, you'll see.
00:24:05.360 I'm going to let it go crazy.
00:24:06.460 So wait, if your hair becomes that curled, your pubes become even curler than that.
00:24:11.400 Oh my God.
00:24:12.140 So yeah.
00:24:13.600 You need to do it like a mullet.
00:24:15.000 I feel like that looks super sick with like a jerry curl looking mullet thing.
00:24:18.540 Oh, you, you have the, uh, the Deion Sanders look from the nineties, dude.
00:24:22.580 And get the, uh, get it like, get it with the, um, because he put like the gel in it
00:24:27.260 too.
00:24:27.940 Yeah.
00:24:28.140 Like it's been gelled up.
00:24:29.380 Looks, looks super wet, but it was dry.
00:24:31.500 And start like cutting, cutting the bellies off all my t-shirts.
00:24:34.180 It's just, you have to get absolutely jacked though.
00:24:38.460 That's the only thing you have to get out there to get absolutely fucking jacked.
00:24:41.260 They have, you got to have like the turtle shell six pack.
00:24:43.460 Otherwise it just looks gay.
00:24:44.800 Dude.
00:24:45.020 Young top was sexy as fuck.
00:24:46.660 I'm not going to lie.
00:24:48.460 Yeah.
00:24:49.160 Now I bet young Tyler probably had the best legs out of all of us though.
00:24:52.840 I bet his legs were nasty.
00:24:54.180 I still do.
00:24:55.080 He still does.
00:24:56.320 Yeah.
00:24:56.600 You know, everyone loves runner's legs.
00:24:58.440 They're so sexy.
00:25:00.800 It's way different.
00:25:01.720 They go to Sturgis.
00:25:05.980 I don't know.
00:25:07.240 Yeah.
00:25:07.540 Biker's legs are way too, the thighs on bikers.
00:25:10.120 Have you never watched those guys?
00:25:11.780 They're like lanky.
00:25:12.860 They're a little bit more muscly than runner legs.
00:25:14.400 They're still lanky, dude.
00:25:15.460 It all depends.
00:25:16.320 I mean, you have similar types.
00:25:18.060 You have like your marathon types.
00:25:19.240 You have your sprinter types.
00:25:20.420 And so.
00:25:20.680 Oh, that's true.
00:25:21.600 It's the, it's the speed guys.
00:25:23.360 It's those guys that do the, uh, the indoor speed cycling.
00:25:27.400 Those dudes have some.
00:25:28.480 Are you for real?
00:25:29.040 Do we have like cycling drag racing?
00:25:30.640 Is that legit a thing?
00:25:32.620 It's not necessarily drag racing, but they go around in circles and like race each other.
00:25:36.700 And they dress like a woman.
00:25:37.280 And they get like really fast.
00:25:38.780 And their thighs.
00:25:39.800 I'm not lying, dude.
00:25:40.420 They're like.
00:25:40.780 There's a, there's a guy.
00:25:41.780 His name is Robert Forrester.
00:25:42.820 I think he's a German guy and his leg is about two of mine, but not a joke.
00:25:47.340 It's.
00:25:47.740 Yeah.
00:25:47.980 They're ginormous.
00:25:49.100 And you could honestly, I'm going to look it up because it's, you got to see this.
00:25:52.700 And actually I was watching, um, this, this weekend, the world games was on, which is
00:25:57.980 like, um, it's basically the Olympics for all the sports that are kind of like, don't
00:26:04.280 make it or kind of retarded.
00:26:05.480 So it has like sumo wrestling.
00:26:07.000 So it's the special Olympics.
00:26:08.400 No, no, no, no.
00:26:09.240 Yes.
00:26:09.600 But it's like, but it's like, uh, sumo wrestling, um, bench press.
00:26:15.280 Like it said, because they, at the Olympics, they do weightlifting, but they don't do bench
00:26:18.960 press.
00:26:19.220 This one is like, we'll do bench press instead.
00:26:21.660 Um, I put a link in the chat there for you.
00:26:23.520 There we go.
00:26:24.200 Pull that up.
00:26:25.300 While we're on Dick and Balls, we should do that video.
00:26:27.700 Holy shit.
00:26:29.240 God damn.
00:26:30.920 What the fuck?
00:26:32.240 How do you even, I'm sharing the screen real quick.
00:26:34.760 Yeah.
00:26:34.960 I was going to say, like, what are we all just going to look at a thing that we're not
00:26:37.060 showing the audience?
00:26:37.560 Fuck those guys.
00:26:40.300 What do you think his taint is like?
00:26:42.160 What the fuck?
00:26:44.900 Those are ridiculous looking.
00:26:46.460 Like they're so disproportionate.
00:26:48.240 Dude, that looks like, so he must not only does he only work out his thighs, but he must
00:26:53.440 be like crippled from the thigh down.
00:26:55.380 No, no, no, no.
00:26:55.520 I'm sorry.
00:26:56.020 But look at his toe.
00:26:57.740 Just look at his wrist.
00:26:58.840 You can tell a dude also has a jacked upper body because like his wrist and forearms are
00:27:03.200 ginormous.
00:27:03.940 It's just so weird his calf to like quad ratio.
00:27:06.820 It's so weird.
00:27:07.200 But I guess you probably don't use calves a whole lot with Vikings.
00:27:09.400 No, I bet his calves are like twice our size, too.
00:27:13.120 Oh, no, they're big.
00:27:14.240 But in comparison to his thighs, like if you look at a bodybuilder, like and how their legs
00:27:18.480 usually look, like there's a better ratio of like thighs to calves.
00:27:23.100 The shape of this guy's body is like the shape of Jacob's head.
00:27:29.580 Also, great dick bulge, too.
00:27:31.640 Do you see that?
00:27:32.580 Yeah, that's nice.
00:27:33.340 Look at that dick bulge.
00:27:33.700 That's a nice.
00:27:34.240 I'm always looking for the bulge.
00:27:35.600 And I'm actually shocked because you think that if he was on roids or something that
00:27:38.700 you would have no bulge.
00:27:39.420 I mean, it's weird.
00:27:40.100 He legit looks like one of those synthol freaks.
00:27:41.960 The people who like put synthol on their fucking shit to like make their.
00:27:44.740 Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:27:46.260 All right.
00:27:46.420 Let's bring up that dick and balls video or not dick and balls.
00:27:49.360 But the video I shared.
00:27:51.280 That's the one from Blaze, right?
00:27:54.300 Yes, yes.
00:27:55.180 Yeah.
00:27:55.480 All right.
00:27:55.920 You can do that.
00:27:56.920 Yeah.
00:27:57.220 That's a good one.
00:27:58.020 I think this is a good stimulating conversation.
00:28:00.120 I don't know what this is.
00:28:02.700 Is this Jack Murphy?
00:28:04.740 Basically, young dude.
00:28:05.740 I just formed a ritual where I stuck this up in my Anish, which is a beautiful roke made
00:28:11.320 of black obsidian to remove impurities.
00:28:13.500 That's what I want.
00:28:14.040 And I prepared for this.
00:28:15.860 I stuck it up in my butthole actually using a rubber tree condom because most condoms are
00:28:21.200 made by slaves and they're made of fake rubber.
00:28:23.440 This company actually looks really bad.
00:28:25.080 They're made by slaves so he puts a slave dick in his ass?
00:28:27.000 Made ethically in Australia.
00:28:28.080 So I put that on there and I just stuck it up.
00:28:30.800 Now, in our culture, that would be called gay behavior.
00:28:34.840 But in ancient cultures, before the dominator system took over, Spartan men, Edo Japan men,
00:28:41.020 the alpha males of First Nations tribes, as well as the double-soul shamans, the druids,
00:28:47.420 the Celtic warriors.
00:28:49.600 Before battle, they would suck each other's nipples.
00:28:52.020 They would massage the mushroom meridian, the heart meridian right here just to prepare
00:28:57.020 for battle.
00:28:57.620 So all these things are actually warrior technologies.
00:29:01.240 Doesn't that sound so much better?
00:29:02.660 Warrior technology.
00:29:04.700 I just performed a ritual.
00:29:06.300 I like it.
00:29:07.240 Warrior technology.
00:29:08.340 That's what we're going to call gay shit from now on.
00:29:10.080 Warrior technology, yes.
00:29:11.800 That's close to how I prepare for battle.
00:29:13.920 Jose, you've been in the military.
00:29:15.740 Is that what you guys did?
00:29:16.920 Yeah.
00:29:17.360 I mean, let's be real.
00:29:18.740 I mean, the closer you go to the homies, the gayer shit gets.
00:29:21.900 But at the same time, like, I mean, is it really gay?
00:29:26.560 I mean, or is it alpha male?
00:29:27.900 Like, the line is so blurry.
00:29:29.760 Yeah, dude, no.
00:29:30.480 Well, think about it.
00:29:32.240 Dude, if you're – well, so I think it goes both ways.
00:29:36.220 So I think if you're the guy who's getting fucked by another guy –
00:29:39.320 It goes both ways.
00:29:40.140 Yeah.
00:29:40.640 If you're the guy who's getting fucked by another guy, that's, like, super gay.
00:29:44.500 But if you're the guy who's fucking another guy, that's, like, super dominant, right?
00:29:48.440 So that's almost, like, anti-gay.
00:29:50.620 But if you fuck each other, that's just brotherly love.
00:29:53.780 Well, they're not – he mentioned that they weren't actually fucking each other.
00:29:57.600 They were just, like, doing weird things, like, playing with the tip.
00:30:01.220 They were doing just the tip, but then they were, like, giving a couple licks and just, like, playing with it a little bit.
00:30:06.820 It's kind of like – you remember that, like, wheelchair motherfucker who was saying that they were, like, inviting him to orgies and doing cocaine with the other –
00:30:13.260 Oh, Madison Cawthorne.
00:30:14.440 And then all of a sudden all this, like, borderline gay shit come out.
00:30:17.080 But I genuinely believe – I don't think he's gay.
00:30:19.560 I think, like, that was all just shit, like, just him and his boys just fucking around.
00:30:24.040 Like, most of the shit was, like, stuff that, like, if you took us out of context, you could make us look so fucking gay.
00:30:29.380 But it's, like, he's just chilling with the dogs, you know?
00:30:31.340 Dude, you can take any clip from this show ever, and then it makes us look super gay.
00:30:36.340 But with Madison –
00:30:37.160 I've literally done that on my show.
00:30:39.240 Yeah, that's what –
00:30:40.080 This gay show.
00:30:41.680 The whole show.
00:30:42.520 That's what your whole show is about.
00:30:43.540 But with Madison Cawthorne, is it, like – so I'm assuming his dick doesn't work.
00:30:49.560 So, is it fair to call these people gay?
00:30:52.560 Because, like, his only option is now butthole for pleasure, right?
00:30:55.360 So –
00:30:56.260 Oh, that's true.
00:30:57.600 Well, so –
00:30:58.620 Warrior technology, baby.
00:31:01.660 No, so I think you get some sort of, like – I don't know.
00:31:04.660 You get a pass from being called gay if your dick is crippled, so you have to use your butthole.
00:31:10.080 But it has to be women pleasure in your butthole, and then you're still not gay.
00:31:13.740 I don't know.
00:31:14.340 Which leads us to the bigger question.
00:31:15.580 Well, that was the leading into it, Tom.
00:31:18.020 I just feel like – I don't know if you guys agree.
00:31:20.280 I feel like maybe Tom would.
00:31:21.380 I feel like the more – the older I get, the less I care about impressing, like, women or, like, people in general.
00:31:27.000 The more secure I become masculine, the gayer I become because I just don't care.
00:31:31.040 Like, for example, like, I have a co-worker –
00:31:32.080 He's justifying his haircut now.
00:31:33.640 Yeah, exactly.
00:31:34.720 Like, for example, I have a co-worker who, like, jokes around about, like, kissing me all the time, and he'll, like –
00:31:39.140 He'll always, like, keep going, and I won't stop because I'm like, I don't give a shit.
00:31:42.380 Like, if anything, like, if you're going to play gay chicken with me, I'm going to go all the way.
00:31:45.340 Like, I'm not going to pussy out.
00:31:46.440 Like, I don't give a fuck.
00:31:47.400 Like, why would I care?
00:31:48.680 Those things are going to –
00:31:49.240 Remember how you're gay?
00:31:50.540 It's going to have a gay orgy and be like, I just don't stop, dude.
00:31:54.660 I just – I don't play chicken, dude.
00:31:58.740 I would kiss a dude.
00:31:59.480 I don't give a fuck.
00:32:00.160 Like, what, are you going to try to fucking test me?
00:32:03.100 Dude, he dared me to fuck his butthole.
00:32:05.060 It's like that firetruck prank where you, like, you say, my hand's a firetruck.
00:32:10.320 You say red light when you want me to stop, and you start rubbing up their leg.
00:32:13.080 And then, like, when they say red light, you say firetrucks don't stop for a red light.
00:32:16.140 Then you, like, grab their dick and jerk them off and all that shit.
00:32:18.560 But, like, Jose just never says red light.
00:32:21.040 He's just like, no, dude, just keep going.
00:32:22.820 Just go.
00:32:23.380 Just suck my dick.
00:32:24.460 I'm legit the kind of guy that will –
00:32:25.900 I'm legit the kind of guy that will walk with a co-worker and then just, like, kind of –
00:32:29.060 Like, kind of, you know, do the little, like, push his balls up.
00:32:31.560 Like, nice dick, bro.
00:32:32.260 And then just keep moving.
00:32:32.980 Like, I don't give a shit.
00:32:35.100 Jose would get fired from, like, any company that I've ever worked for.
00:32:38.920 Also, Spud Ruckus said, just the tip, edge warlords.
00:32:43.000 That's pretty funny.
00:32:44.000 I've always worked, like, pretty much blue-collar type shit.
00:32:47.420 So, it's like, I don't know.
00:32:48.240 Like, maybe it's a vibe that they just don't give a shit.
00:32:50.060 Like, you work hard and you can be gay as fuck.
00:32:52.260 Toad, you just live in a gay-ass city.
00:32:54.140 You live in a city that is a faggy, like, place.
00:32:57.880 That's it.
00:32:58.400 Yeah, but the one awesome thing about it is that it makes me so hetero in comparison.
00:33:02.800 It's weird.
00:33:03.420 It's like the gay for your workplaces, the less gay they'll let you be, if that makes sense.
00:33:07.720 Yeah.
00:33:09.040 Toad just said his wingman is Andy Dick.
00:33:11.420 I think that's what he –
00:33:13.500 Oh, yeah.
00:33:15.320 Yeah, exactly.
00:33:16.260 Like, if you have a gay wingman, yeah, that's exactly what you want, man.
00:33:19.220 Because they can lure in the women and then you're the only one who's hetero, so you get to fuck them.
00:33:24.380 Yeah, but you do have to jerk them off at the end of the night.
00:33:26.600 You know that, right?
00:33:27.300 You have to put out.
00:33:28.440 It's worth it.
00:33:29.460 Yeah, that's true.
00:33:30.620 You think the warriors were making each other come or just touch it?
00:33:33.620 Because I feel like if – like, I'd be spent.
00:33:35.280 Like, I'm not ready to –
00:33:36.140 No, no, no, no.
00:33:37.080 It's definitely a thing of, like, you want to get them kind of aroused.
00:33:40.980 And that gets you, like, your male testosterone up, that hunting kind of, like, mood.
00:33:48.440 Like, I feel like that's what they were doing.
00:33:50.440 I feel like –
00:33:50.960 They would have hedged each other.
00:33:51.940 Like, sweet dick, bro.
00:33:53.300 Like, if I was a chick, I would suck this.
00:33:55.020 I'm just going to play with it, though.
00:33:56.280 God, you're going to be so crushed out there in the battlefield.
00:33:58.640 No, but you know what?
00:33:59.540 That's true.
00:33:59.920 Because Mike Tyson said that.
00:34:01.920 He was like, when I fight, my dick gets hard.
00:34:05.680 I like to fucking fight.
00:34:07.500 It's like, man, there is something to that.
00:34:08.920 This also explains why Cole gets a boner taking a shit.
00:34:13.100 Exactly.
00:34:14.260 Preparing for battle.
00:34:15.660 Preparing for battle.
00:34:17.200 Well, the warriors would do, like, what we talked about with Josh Denny recently.
00:34:20.300 They would do the sword fighting or beefing.
00:34:25.300 Now, also, we also did gloss past that he was, like, he was also first putting up the obsidian, like, up his ass.
00:34:32.700 And he said, like, that gets out impurities.
00:34:35.100 And then, like, he pulled out, like, a huge black.
00:34:38.760 Dude, that's, like, some Gwyneth Paltrow shit, like, where she, like, shoves a jade egg up.
00:34:42.420 Also, do you know that if, like, obsidian breaks, it's, like, sharper than, like, little scalpels.
00:34:49.040 So, like, if it ever broke in his ass, like, it would.
00:34:52.000 Holy shit.
00:34:52.560 But the benefits outweigh the wrists, obviously, Cole.
00:34:54.920 That's true.
00:34:56.020 Yeah, dude, his entire ass would just be one huge anal fissure.
00:35:00.160 Yeah, it would be, really.
00:35:01.300 You've seen that video, right?
00:35:03.080 The guy, he put, like, a, I think it was a mason jar in his ass.
00:35:05.680 One man, one jar.
00:35:06.760 Yeah, yeah.
00:35:07.460 He died.
00:35:08.340 Oh, no.
00:35:09.500 He, like, squatted.
00:35:10.540 He squatted onto a mason jar, and it disappeared.
00:35:13.120 And then, yeah.
00:35:14.280 And then it busts.
00:35:15.180 And then he starts picking, like, the glass out of his bloody ass.
00:35:18.720 Yeah.
00:35:18.860 So, Tyler, are you happy we're back to the old vibe?
00:35:21.320 I heard you bitching about us moving out of our fucking lane and trying something different.
00:35:25.520 I heard you in your show.
00:35:27.280 You don't like conspiracies, Tyler?
00:35:28.680 Fuck you.
00:35:29.020 You guys actually, you actually.
00:35:31.300 Tyler, oh, that isn't great.
00:35:34.800 Oh, you go give your thing, and then I'll ask my question.
00:35:36.960 No, I really did.
00:35:37.980 Yeah, I would just, I love the conspiracy stuff, but maybe it was just, I don't know.
00:35:42.820 I didn't like Jose's name for the conspiracies.
00:35:46.040 That's all it was.
00:35:47.060 Nobody really liked it.
00:35:48.760 That's a cop out and a lie, and you know it.
00:35:51.660 Probably true.
00:35:52.180 So, Cole, what did you have to say?
00:35:53.180 I was going to ask you, Tyler, what is some of your favorite conspiracies?
00:35:56.800 Yeah, let's make the entire conspiracy up to me, Tyler.
00:36:01.420 I don't really have to.
00:36:02.860 By the way, you've turned me on to that Wendigoon or whatever the guy's name is.
00:36:07.040 You're welcome.
00:36:07.720 We turned you on.
00:36:08.500 Oh, hell yeah.
00:36:09.260 He's a nice voice.
00:36:10.400 What's good about him is he's not, I don't think he's the crazy, and that's the problem
00:36:14.560 with a lot of the conspiracy stuff, right?
00:36:16.320 You hand over your reality, and you embrace too many crackpot ideas, and then everything
00:36:23.120 is just a joke.
00:36:24.380 I love it, though, but you just got to be smart and be like, I don't believe this, but that's
00:36:27.980 interesting.
00:36:28.980 No, the interest part is, of course, there.
00:36:31.980 So, when you had Mark Clair on, and you guys were all saying nuclear energy is not real.
00:36:37.900 That's not what we said.
00:36:39.460 I don't think that's what we said.
00:36:41.920 We said nuclear bombs aren't really real.
00:36:44.960 We said nukes might not be real.
00:36:47.960 Whatever.
00:36:48.360 I was like, oh, this is where you guys jumped the shark, and now I can't.
00:36:53.220 What are you going to believe now?
00:36:54.460 No.
00:36:55.160 Tyler, are you an anarchist?
00:36:57.760 Oh, yeah.
00:36:58.760 Okay, because right now in the conspiracy world, you're acting like a minarchist, like
00:37:01.820 a bitch, we'd say.
00:37:04.100 You're blue-pilled, bro.
00:37:05.880 You're blue-pilled.
00:37:06.940 I don't get the connection, but I'm willing to listen.
00:37:09.420 What's your conspiracy on this?
00:37:10.520 Let's hear it.
00:37:12.460 Oh, and nukes aren't real?
00:37:13.960 Yeah, nukes aren't real.
00:37:14.640 No, then I'm a minarchist on my views of...
00:37:17.660 Oh, no, no.
00:37:19.000 I'm just saying comparatively.
00:37:20.260 In the conspiracy world, all right, so I'm full-blown.
00:37:24.780 This is a simulation.
00:37:26.600 Whatever.
00:37:27.020 Probably flat.
00:37:27.580 Maybe both, because it's a simulation.
00:37:30.900 You'll say flat Earth is outlandish, which is like the same argument that minarchists would
00:37:35.960 have with an anarchist.
00:37:36.900 We're like, well, we need to stay a little bit.
00:37:38.220 It was like, give it six months.
00:37:40.020 Pay attention a little more.
00:37:40.900 Give it six months.
00:37:41.460 You're going to come right back, and you're going to be like, there's lizard people in
00:37:44.020 Antarctica.
00:37:44.380 Oh, I never thought about that like that.
00:37:46.740 That's very good.
00:37:47.460 Interesting.
00:37:48.420 Yeah, the Flat Earth Dave, or whatever his name was, he makes it tough to grab.
00:37:53.960 Yeah, yeah.
00:37:54.760 I'm not huge into the Flat Earth one.
00:37:57.020 Like, I'm more of the Hollow Earth.
00:37:58.660 I don't think...
00:37:59.020 I think the Flat Earth one is just so easily debunked.
00:38:02.340 The Hollow Earth makes sense to me.
00:38:02.960 It's like...
00:38:03.200 The problem with a lot of the conspiracies is you make course connections that sound great
00:38:11.720 until you, you know, broaden your horizons, maybe, and think a little bit out of the box
00:38:15.640 with it instead of always...
00:38:16.940 It's easy to pigeonhole everything, and sometimes this, you know, like the shortest distance between
00:38:21.080 two points is a straight line, and everything...
00:38:24.520 I don't know.
00:38:24.820 It's just...
00:38:25.220 Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
00:38:26.100 Listen, listen.
00:38:27.300 All right.
00:38:27.740 9-11.
00:38:28.420 9-11.
00:38:30.020 All right, now, Queen Elizabeth was born on September of the 12th month of the year, January.
00:38:37.960 That was a good episode, Jose.
00:38:39.340 Fuck you.
00:38:40.400 Oh, that was so funny.
00:38:41.980 So, uh...
00:38:43.120 And if you take Elizabeth and you count up all the letters in her name...
00:38:48.020 No, so what happens is...
00:38:49.240 He's telling us the Rothschild.
00:38:51.320 There was a numerologist came on to say...
00:38:54.020 I hate that shit so much.
00:38:55.300 I can't even wrap my head around it.
00:38:57.640 You're like, dude, this motherfucker's spitting facts.
00:39:01.760 It's like the Jim Carrey movie, the number 23.
00:39:05.380 The numbers is where you get really screwy, because you can make connections so easily.
00:39:10.040 Yeah, with anything.
00:39:10.860 Some of it is reaching, but some of it is true.
00:39:13.880 I feel like there are numbers that pop up constantly.
00:39:16.340 There are things that go on in this world that are, like, very...
00:39:18.960 But when you try to decipher it, it gets into ridiculous territory.
00:39:22.340 Well, now...
00:39:23.200 Yeah.
00:39:23.840 So, well, I was going to say, like, the CERN shit just happened, or they just turned it
00:39:28.600 back on at, like, higher speeds than ever before.
00:39:30.680 And then right after that, we saw the Mandela effect Britney Spears thing.
00:39:36.140 Do we think that we're in a different timeline, dude?
00:39:38.920 Yo, Tyler, what color...
00:39:40.460 Britney Spears, man.
00:39:41.020 You may not be aware of this.
00:39:42.340 What color was Britney Spears' dress in Hit Me Baby one more time?
00:39:45.800 I could have heard it was plaid because of the things I did afterwards.
00:39:50.700 It was...
00:39:51.220 Tyler, by the way, she was 16 at the time.
00:39:54.800 And they've had multiple people recreate it, including Britney Spears herself, Andy Dick,
00:39:58.480 and almost everyone's plaid.
00:40:00.140 It's weird.
00:40:00.500 From what I've heard, what I heard about this was that the original music video, she didn't
00:40:07.360 wear a plaid one.
00:40:08.220 On all the other ones, she did.
00:40:10.060 So anytime she did, like, a live event or any other type of thing that she did, the Hit
00:40:16.360 Me Baby one more time, she did it with a plaid.
00:40:18.460 Well, there are pictures of her doing that.
00:40:20.720 That's bullshit.
00:40:21.120 That's what I...
00:40:21.740 That's bullshit.
00:40:23.160 Because, like, you do...
00:40:24.060 Like, you know people are going to associate with a music video.
00:40:26.760 Because who the fuck...
00:40:27.420 It's not like everyone's going to live performances, especially that period of time.
00:40:30.260 Right.
00:40:30.500 Like, the media you're taking from that, most people...
00:40:33.300 I never went to a Britney Spears show.
00:40:34.120 You know what it is, too?
00:40:35.460 A Mandela effect.
00:40:36.700 So maybe Cole's right.
00:40:38.740 So, like, Queen, We Are the Champions, everybody says, of the world, right, at the end.
00:40:43.840 Right.
00:40:44.020 The song ends with, are the champions.
00:40:47.060 Yeah.
00:40:47.220 And it just stops at that point.
00:40:48.740 But in a live version, he says, of the world, and that part took off.
00:40:52.480 That's more believable with music, though.
00:40:54.020 Yes.
00:40:54.120 And it fucks you up.
00:40:55.600 Well, like, the audio aspect of the music, because some people will listen to, like, live
00:40:59.920 versions of it and shit like that, and it'll get kind of inserted, and that can just catch
00:41:03.940 on, be, like, basically, like, a memetic type thing.
00:41:05.880 But now with something, like, a visual thing from a music video, especially in a time where
00:41:10.680 there was less media, so people...
00:41:12.940 The only way most people, the vast majority of people were consuming that was through that
00:41:16.840 music video.
00:41:17.500 Most people weren't going to the shows, watching some fucking, like, teenager fucking teeny
00:41:22.980 bopping around.
00:41:23.780 Yeah, dude, you remember the video.
00:41:25.240 It was being constantly played on MTV.
00:41:27.620 Dude, it fucking sucks, too, because you can't, like...
00:41:29.880 Like, and I guess that's the whole thing about the Medellin thing, is, like, you want to
00:41:34.280 be like, no, there's a video, and I have it somewhere, but, like, because of either it
00:41:39.260 was always like that, and we were all, for some reason, at a different time, like, it's
00:41:43.300 just such a weird thing to be like, no, no, no.
00:41:45.300 You know what, though?
00:41:45.460 I just thought it through my head, and I think I just disproved myself a little bit.
00:41:48.680 I remember at that point in time, award shows were a much bigger deal.
00:41:53.400 So I think there probably was a live performance at some point.
00:41:56.500 Well, because YouTube was not around.
00:42:00.100 YouTube was not around.
00:42:00.760 I know, but the award shows were a big deal, so I could see it would be a latch on to that.
00:42:04.500 Nah, they had the VMAs, but TRL and shit was, like, way, way bigger.
00:42:08.860 I've been teasing my conspiracy theory for, like, fucking weeks now, and this is, like,
00:42:15.520 spot on to what I'm talking about.
00:42:15.640 All right, bring out the next video.
00:42:16.960 No, I'm just kidding.
00:42:17.420 Go ahead.
00:42:19.960 You're really white.
00:42:22.120 Yeah, that's...
00:42:23.480 This is all a simulation.
00:42:24.480 I'm calling Kaepernick.
00:42:25.200 Yeah, this is all an MTV Crips, by the way.
00:42:29.700 No, listen.
00:42:30.320 All right, so...
00:42:31.460 Don't worry.
00:42:34.560 Come on, Tommy.
00:42:35.220 Give it a conspiracy theory.
00:42:36.720 Go ahead, Tommy.
00:42:37.020 I'll give it to you guys.
00:42:39.080 I have to formulate it.
00:42:40.400 So what we're talking about here, when you're talking about CERN fucking up the timeline
00:42:43.960 and all this, which is, like, possibly true, we're talking about, like, crazy vibration.
00:42:48.800 Like, in the grand scheme of things, whatever they're doing with their colliding atoms at
00:42:55.280 super speed with their large hydron collider, what they're doing is they're fucking with...
00:43:01.100 Sorry.
00:43:02.340 They're fucking with the vibrations.
00:43:04.160 And I've done a lot of, like, research.
00:43:06.900 So before I was an artist...
00:43:08.520 Actually, before I was doing art professionally, I was a musician professionally, and I got,
00:43:12.960 like, I went really deep down the rabbit hole.
00:43:14.880 Oh, I was really hoping you'd be, like, before I was an artist, I was a nuclear physicist.
00:43:20.460 And actually...
00:43:21.500 And one day, I walked in and not shit happened.
00:43:24.700 Instead, he's saying he's part of the village people.
00:43:28.100 Come on.
00:43:28.280 Yes.
00:43:29.040 Yeah.
00:43:30.820 So I went down the rabbit hole on something called Perfect Pitch, and I got, like, obsessed
00:43:36.020 with it and how to, like, how to basically attain this thing, like, where, you know,
00:43:40.940 it's a musician could listen to a song and pick out every note in it just by, like, hearing it.
00:43:46.960 Yeah.
00:43:47.400 So...
00:43:47.620 I like the idea of a perfect circle.
00:43:49.140 It's basically impossible kind of deal.
00:43:51.280 No, Perfect Pitch definitely exists.
00:43:53.180 Perfect Pitch exists.
00:43:54.040 Yeah, people have it.
00:43:55.260 And people actually use it in speech.
00:43:58.420 Like, there's different inflections that you can hit that convey different tones, and
00:44:01.720 it'll attract people to listen or not listen.
00:44:05.140 Did Obama have Perfect Pitch?
00:44:06.480 Because I think they might have something there.
00:44:09.180 Who?
00:44:09.960 Obama.
00:44:11.120 Wasn't that a teenage movie, Perfect Pitch?
00:44:13.040 Obama is definitely aware.
00:44:14.300 He's definitely...
00:44:15.140 But Obama is definitely aware of that.
00:44:20.360 He's aware of the pitches that he's articulating while he's doing the speech.
00:44:24.020 Which is why he's such a good speech giver.
00:44:25.240 Obama was constantly giving us the brown note, actually.
00:44:30.940 God damn it.
00:44:32.700 Get to it.
00:44:34.120 That's it.
00:44:34.620 That's why Biden shit his pants with the Pope.
00:44:38.080 That's right.
00:44:38.740 I'm getting to it.
00:44:39.620 So...
00:44:39.720 All right, let me reach with another joke.
00:44:41.040 That old thing leads me to something called synesthesia, which Jimi Hendrix, Pharrell, Neo
00:44:49.900 have.
00:44:50.840 And it's like...
00:44:52.040 It's a diagnosed disease or something where you correlate colors and sounds.
00:44:58.340 Yeah.
00:44:58.600 So a lot of people have...
00:44:59.440 I actually have a little bit of that.
00:45:01.220 Like, when I'm listening to music, I can hear the key of a song.
00:45:04.640 The general key.
00:45:05.220 Not specific notes, but it sounds like a color to me.
00:45:08.840 So I did more research on this.
00:45:10.280 This nigga hears colors talk.
00:45:13.280 He's a person's color.
00:45:15.600 I mean, when people do drugs, too, they do hear color.
00:45:18.220 Like, if you're doing DMT or even read to some point, too.
00:45:23.280 The key of G to me.
00:45:25.320 Yeah.
00:45:25.700 Light blue is the key of D.
00:45:27.100 The key of D minor.
00:45:28.660 Yeah.
00:45:28.960 It's...
00:45:29.400 I'm dead serious.
00:45:30.440 E major sounds like an orange to me.
00:45:33.560 So all those collections of notes.
00:45:35.040 Top's favorite key is A minor.
00:45:36.840 G sharp.
00:45:38.640 Yes.
00:45:39.300 Because that's what all...
00:45:40.460 Every song in the Holocaust is written in.
00:45:43.720 So, all right.
00:45:44.340 So here we...
00:45:44.860 It gets crazier.
00:45:46.220 I know.
00:45:46.560 You guys are like...
00:45:47.260 You're losing me here.
00:45:48.140 But if you look at it...
00:45:50.600 You're losing me.
00:45:51.220 Is white a major key?
00:45:53.040 That sounds like a major key to me.
00:45:55.620 It's a key to everything, if you will.
00:45:57.980 Yes.
00:45:59.180 If you break down, like, how we hear sound, it's in frequency, which is just, again, vibrations.
00:46:05.200 So if something is vibrating 440 hertz per second, we hear it as an A note.
00:46:13.140 And then you double that.
00:46:14.160 That's the next, like, an A2, A3.
00:46:17.680 And everything in between that would be the rest of the scale.
00:46:21.220 That's just how it is.
00:46:22.200 You mean B flat and B?
00:46:24.820 Shut the fuck up.
00:46:25.540 Jesus Christ, guys.
00:46:26.100 All right.
00:46:26.220 Let them get through all this boring...
00:46:27.960 No.
00:46:28.840 Music, talk.
00:46:29.580 Sorry.
00:46:30.060 What I mean is...
00:46:30.780 Tie it in.
00:46:31.440 Tie the knot on it.
00:46:32.240 Let's go.
00:46:33.520 A at 440 is regular A.
00:46:37.420 880 vibrations is the next octave up.
00:46:40.300 Everything in between is the scale.
00:46:42.160 Oh, I get you.
00:46:43.020 It's the next A.
00:46:43.920 Yeah, I get you.
00:46:44.820 Yes.
00:46:45.000 But it's almost assigned a number most of the time.
00:46:47.720 Like, the pitch is assigned a number.
00:46:49.200 But now I'm working in the field of graphic design and art.
00:46:52.300 And I'm dealing with color.
00:46:53.440 But most importantly, color and light.
00:46:55.700 Because the computer is, like, a vibrant...
00:46:57.520 When you work in CMYK, it's just light.
00:47:00.000 And it operates on the same exact scale.
00:47:03.140 It's just vibrations.
00:47:04.040 The way we perceive color, it's how many...
00:47:06.680 Like, how fast or how slow something is vibrating.
00:47:10.380 So, if it's red, it's vibrating fairly quickly.
00:47:12.960 Infrared.
00:47:13.660 If it's blue, like, almost all the way to purple, it would be...
00:47:17.680 What do they call it?
00:47:18.600 Ultraviolet.
00:47:19.100 So, that's the scale.
00:47:20.620 But in the matter of frequency that it's vibrating, it lines up almost perfectly with the music scale.
00:47:26.880 Which is kind of freaky to me.
00:47:29.220 And then you start talking about synesthesia.
00:47:30.940 But I'm like, there's too many things connected here where it seems like this is like a matrix.
00:47:35.040 Like, just programmed.
00:47:36.680 No, no.
00:47:37.080 I get what you're saying.
00:47:38.240 I use this argument.
00:47:39.580 Yeah.
00:47:39.840 For saying that there is a creator of some kind.
00:47:42.920 Oh, my God.
00:47:43.720 Let's not get into that faggotry.
00:47:44.960 Yeah, no.
00:47:46.220 Because you have all these, like, universal...
00:47:49.120 You have all these laws of physics that apply universally, man.
00:47:52.260 It's fucking weird.
00:47:53.840 And one last thing.
00:47:55.360 Finish it and then I've got one for you.
00:47:57.360 I'll tie it off here.
00:47:58.480 But there's so much more to it.
00:47:59.840 But it gets you all the way down to, like, Tesla.
00:48:03.080 And Tesla said, if you want to, like, understand the secrets of the universe,
00:48:07.960 you have to understand vibration and energy.
00:48:11.380 So I'll leave you at that.
00:48:13.340 But there's something more going on there.
00:48:15.420 So what was your whole thing with CERN real quick?
00:48:17.800 You started with CERN and you never figured out.
00:48:20.140 I don't think you understand B minor is a blue.
00:48:22.600 So just put two and two together.
00:48:24.940 I think you'll get what we're saying here.
00:48:26.480 Well, CERN is light.
00:48:27.800 He's talking about light and making us realize he really is on the light spectrum.
00:48:33.300 I'm, like, way, way on the spectrum.
00:48:36.300 The only thing I can think of, because I mentioned this in the chat when Top was talking about CERN.
00:48:41.300 And this was, like, I think it was before they even turned it on.
00:48:45.280 Again, maybe.
00:48:45.960 We were talking about CERN for some reason.
00:48:47.460 I can't remember.
00:48:47.840 Maybe it was when they turned it on.
00:48:48.640 Because they were about to turn it on.
00:48:50.120 Yeah, and I mentioned that the first time they started it, before they even, like, before they actually got it to shoot the fucking atom, the entire thing broke down for no reason.
00:49:01.780 Like, it got damaged.
00:49:02.920 Like, there was a huge, like, shockwave that damaged it.
00:49:05.420 But they hadn't turned it on yet.
00:49:07.160 And they were, like, okay, that's kind of weird.
00:49:08.560 And they fixed it.
00:49:09.420 And then they went and it actually went and happened.
00:49:12.300 And what it was, what they think it is, is that time is also on a vibration.
00:49:17.220 It acts in waves.
00:49:19.200 And so, just like a ripple, it goes out in all directions.
00:49:24.200 And so, it actually went back in time.
00:49:27.660 And whatever they did, whenever they, in the forward in time, whenever they hit go and it fucking smashed atoms together, it went back in time and actually destroyed the machine that they used.
00:49:37.840 Oh, yeah.
00:49:38.680 And so, that was, and I don't know how that, but I guess that kind of lines up top.
00:49:42.560 Yeah, yeah.
00:49:43.160 That's kind of what you're saying.
00:49:43.700 They're fucking with vibrations.
00:49:44.940 And it's just kind of funny.
00:49:45.960 Space and time are late.
00:49:47.300 You know, every time, they would never be able to start it.
00:49:49.740 Because every time they go start it, it would technically break beforehand.
00:49:52.880 But it would break.
00:49:53.600 And they just fixed it.
00:49:54.860 And then they would just go again.
00:49:56.400 Yeah, but you're saying.
00:49:57.100 Because it did happen.
00:49:58.120 No, Cole is right.
00:49:59.040 You would not wind up in an infinite loop.
00:50:01.380 Okay.
00:50:01.740 Y'all need to get some pussy.
00:50:04.100 Yeah.
00:50:05.060 You know how smug Tyler probably is right now.
00:50:07.600 I told you.
00:50:08.660 You know how smug Tyler probably is right now.
00:50:09.860 So, you're not getting.
00:50:10.920 After listening to you talk, being like, Jesus Christ, he's just proving everything I just said earlier, right?
00:50:16.980 Yeah.
00:50:18.040 Tyler, what did you have?
00:50:18.980 You said you had something.
00:50:20.640 Oh, so, as an engineer, there's a few things that are mystical that I think that help prove.
00:50:26.020 You're a fucking lawyer, bro.
00:50:28.240 I know, but I've got an engineering degree before.
00:50:29.740 The three of us are engineers right here.
00:50:31.320 It happens a lot, by the way.
00:50:32.240 It's not uncommon either.
00:50:33.860 I just don't believe it.
00:50:34.820 No, no.
00:50:35.220 That's true.
00:50:36.640 I don't know what to tell you.
00:50:37.460 I'm a legit mechanical engineer.
00:50:39.840 I mean, who else?
00:50:41.120 Cole?
00:50:41.940 There you go.
00:50:42.780 So, that doesn't necessarily give me credibility.
00:50:45.400 But I took thermodynamics.
00:50:47.740 And there's a few things there.
00:50:48.720 One, the second law of thermodynamics is that everything goes from order to chaos.
00:50:53.100 Okay.
00:50:53.400 So, you're kind of deviating away from the standard of having evolution go towards something bigger that you're going to create something out of nothing.
00:51:03.140 It's difficult to do.
00:51:04.440 Oh, my God.
00:51:04.840 Are we doing the God thing now?
00:51:06.380 Yeah.
00:51:07.240 Go on.
00:51:07.860 I'm just throwing two of them out there.
00:51:09.220 And then the other one is think of water.
00:51:11.460 Okay.
00:51:11.680 Liquid.
00:51:12.040 Liquid, it's the only thing that in a liquid form, in solid form, it's less dense than in any other else.
00:51:18.640 So, you have any other kind of minerals, any kind of other substance, in its solid form, it's more dense.
00:51:27.020 So, if water happened to be more dense, as an ice cube, as an example, you would freeze everything.
00:51:32.440 It would drop to the bottom of the water, of lakes, oceans.
00:51:35.040 And you would have a perpetual frozen lake, frozen ocean that would never thaw out, whereas it's less dense.
00:51:42.140 And also kill all the animals that live in it, too.
00:51:45.080 So, it's this unique thing that's just with water, because if it wasn't that way, it would pretty much put us extinct.
00:51:53.100 Ice floats to the top, and therefore, the bottom could be the liquid water as we did it.
00:51:58.780 Anyway.
00:51:59.100 Right.
00:51:59.460 Yeah.
00:52:00.540 It's an interesting concept, Jose.
00:52:01.880 You want to think about before you burn in hell.
00:52:03.960 That's just all I'm saying.
00:52:05.040 Yeah, that's right.
00:52:05.860 You know what?
00:52:06.220 You convinced me with this water argument.
00:52:07.900 I believe in God now.
00:52:08.680 It's a good argument for intelligent design.
00:52:12.880 Yeah, I've said before, I'm not necessarily against the idea of there being some sort of intelligent design.
00:52:17.460 Or design.
00:52:18.260 It doesn't necessarily have to be intelligent, but like...
00:52:20.440 God is a retard, okay?
00:52:23.620 I don't know, for example...
00:52:24.320 You're driving an Eastern European car.
00:52:25.880 I get it.
00:52:26.240 When I say intelligent design, I mean like they necessarily intended to.
00:52:29.280 For example, one of the common things people will joke about in atheist communities, they used to be picking that.
00:52:33.640 They'd be like, oh, it could be universe farting pixies.
00:52:36.820 And it's like, obviously that's just being silly.
00:52:39.080 But the idea being that like it wasn't like they were like, oh, I planned it all out.
00:52:43.120 It just so happened to be a byproduct.
00:52:44.860 Or like Lovecraft, his concept of God and his universe was the dreaming God.
00:52:49.700 And literally we're just extreme.
00:52:51.320 And he didn't really intend it.
00:52:52.480 Like he doesn't give a fuck about us.
00:52:54.140 Like this is just what's going on in his head essentially while he's dreaming.
00:52:57.020 And then whenever he wakes up, the whole world ends.
00:52:59.320 Because he's kind of come to.
00:53:00.940 So I'm not against it.
00:53:02.380 I'm pretty friendly to the idea of like deism or whatever.
00:53:04.960 Like people obviously get confused sometimes saying you're an atheist.
00:53:08.420 Like I don't believe in a God, but I also don't like assert there isn't one.
00:53:11.760 I just, I haven't seen any proof of it necessarily.
00:53:15.120 Like, and yeah, and they're like, oh, look at the sky.
00:53:16.980 And you're like, okay, yeah, maybe that implies to some extent, sort of.
00:53:20.400 But also which God?
00:53:21.800 Like, is it, are we talking about, are we talking about Shiva?
00:53:24.820 Are we talking about the Judeo-Christian God?
00:53:26.840 Like, okay, what are we doing here?
00:53:28.300 Like you get rid of this.
00:53:29.100 We don't want to talk about Shiva when we're talking about CERN.
00:53:32.160 Yeah.
00:53:32.580 Well, that's why that's the first thing in mind.
00:53:34.520 Oh, someone in the Outlaw Barber said, ask her about Martha Bueno squirting.
00:53:39.740 That was something that happened that she did inadvertently confirm that she did be squirting.
00:53:46.160 That is actually something she did to me.
00:53:47.980 Wait, wait.
00:53:48.800 I always see you guys writing about this.
00:53:50.700 So tell me.
00:53:52.380 Oh.
00:53:52.520 Top started it.
00:53:53.600 Oh, you didn't know that she would be squirting?
00:53:54.780 No, but did she be squirting?
00:53:56.480 I mean, is there.
00:53:57.240 Apparently, she don't know what she said.
00:53:59.120 Oh, damn it.
00:53:59.800 If I could find.
00:54:00.940 See, this is her problem.
00:54:02.040 She says these things and then she gets acting.
00:54:04.280 She acts so put upon about people coming at her with, with, hey, you'd be squirting or you're showing your tits.
00:54:12.460 I think Top had asked her if she'd be squirting, like back in the day when he had that thing, right?
00:54:18.740 No, that was Brandon.
00:54:19.420 Brandon asked her.
00:54:20.360 Oh, it was Brandon.
00:54:21.140 I didn't found Cluffington.
00:54:22.780 Well, that makes sense.
00:54:23.680 All right.
00:54:24.000 Fuck yeah.
00:54:24.400 It was Brandon.
00:54:25.100 Let's go Brandon.
00:54:26.080 Yeah.
00:54:26.280 I remember that blew up and then she tried to be like, look at these LP fuckers and how mean they are.
00:54:30.220 Right.
00:54:30.520 She called everybody.
00:54:31.420 I mean, I love Brandon.
00:54:32.740 I don't mean to be like a retard.
00:54:33.640 The toad court.
00:54:35.100 Like, this is just some dude who exists off chaos and is fucking with you.
00:54:37.980 She went after Ofer pretty good.
00:54:40.460 He's in the chat here.
00:54:41.400 I see that.
00:54:42.140 Yeah.
00:54:42.280 She posted what he'd said because he went after her pretty good and she posted it in some stupid – you know, when we were in Reno, Toad, she posted on Twitter or Facebook or one of those things, her in a bikini in her –
00:54:54.740 Oh, I saw that.
00:54:55.600 She was inviting people to her room.
00:54:57.260 Inviting a room to her room and she's in a bikini.
00:54:59.800 So, Toad, how was it?
00:55:03.420 Media was also offering old fashions too.
00:55:06.400 That was the best part.
00:55:07.340 Oh, yeah.
00:55:07.980 And she didn't realize that.
00:55:08.460 Oh, she was literally inviting me.
00:55:09.800 There you go.
00:55:11.560 Well, okay.
00:55:12.460 So, I think this is actually on my band account.
00:55:16.000 You saw the answer to that.
00:55:17.800 I think this is on my band account.
00:55:18.280 She's not a real libertarian if she doesn't.
00:55:20.540 But I asked her.
00:55:22.160 She said something.
00:55:24.100 I don't know.
00:55:24.600 It had to be on this account because I wasn't blocked by her yet.
00:55:27.700 You tagged her on something, I thought, because somebody else said something about squirting.
00:55:31.460 But I did ask if it do be squirting and she was just like, you'll never –
00:55:36.820 It was something like where she basically said yes, but you'll never get it.
00:55:41.460 Like how she was like saying it, which was hilarious to me.
00:55:46.420 So, you'll never give me a golden shower.
00:55:48.340 Okay, baby.
00:55:49.060 Top has been aching to ask for a while if getting your taint licked as gay, which I don't think it is.
00:55:54.740 But then I guess the next logical thing is like –
00:55:57.360 By whom?
00:55:58.100 If it's by a guy.
00:55:59.280 How far down is it gay?
00:56:00.840 I don't even care.
00:56:01.800 If you're getting your butthole licked by a chick, it's not gay.
00:56:04.520 So, I mean, there's no further amount.
00:56:06.320 I mean, that's just like it's borderline warrior technology territory.
00:56:09.600 Yes, it is.
00:56:10.280 So, I think the answer to this is clear, I think.
00:56:13.980 So, getting your taint licked is not gay.
00:56:16.120 But if your tongue penetrates the butthole, that's when it becomes gay.
00:56:20.780 Yeah.
00:56:21.020 No.
00:56:21.860 No.
00:56:22.040 Let me ask you this, though.
00:56:23.160 Does she end up with –
00:56:24.300 Cole is like –
00:56:26.820 Does she end up with what?
00:56:28.340 Typhoid.
00:56:29.520 Oh.
00:56:32.520 Or pink eye.
00:56:33.440 If she has either one of those, it's definitely gay.
00:56:35.660 Pink eye from the brown eye.
00:56:36.600 Oh, Jesus.
00:56:40.560 I don't think it's gay.
00:56:42.240 I think anytime – if it's anything with a woman, it cannot be gay.
00:56:46.020 That's the whole thing.
00:56:46.820 Like, it doesn't matter.
00:56:47.460 It can be weird, but it's technically not gay.
00:56:50.040 Yeah.
00:56:50.280 You could ask me, hey, would you do this, this, this?
00:56:53.260 It's like, is a woman involved?
00:56:54.620 Not fucking gay, dude.
00:56:56.040 That's it.
00:56:56.760 And that's basically always my answer.
00:56:58.880 So, if she bends you over and pegs the shit out of you, you're just – now, you're acting gay.
00:57:04.760 It's gay.
00:57:05.560 Cole.
00:57:05.840 But you're not gay.
00:57:06.720 No, no.
00:57:07.300 It is gay.
00:57:08.060 The time to stop talking was like 30 seconds ago.
00:57:11.960 Well, I got it back.
00:57:13.560 It's definitively not gay.
00:57:15.160 When Elizabeth pegs my ass, it's not gay, guys.
00:57:17.380 Okay?
00:57:17.680 I will have Cole's back.
00:57:19.480 It's definitively not gay.
00:57:20.900 I will say it's concerning.
00:57:22.920 You know?
00:57:23.160 It's kind of like –
00:57:23.920 Yeah.
00:57:24.620 It's kind of like some moral issues.
00:57:26.940 You're like, is this libertarian or whatever?
00:57:28.940 And you're like, no.
00:57:29.440 He's like sitting his son down.
00:57:31.060 Listen, listen, listen.
00:57:32.560 I'll put it in the way your caveman brains can understand it.
00:57:36.020 Like, if your car has a check engine light, come on.
00:57:39.120 That doesn't mean the car isn't working.
00:57:41.200 It's just like, oh, I should be concerned about it.
00:57:43.840 I should go get it checked out.
00:57:45.240 If you get a – like, I almost said a dick in your ass.
00:57:48.840 That makes no sense.
00:57:51.120 If you get a dick in your ass.
00:57:51.920 I'm curious where your check engine theory is going here.
00:57:54.460 Go ahead.
00:57:54.800 No, if your car gets a dick in the exhaust pipe, then it's gay.
00:57:58.580 Okay?
00:57:58.820 No, no, no.
00:57:59.300 But it's like in the same way.
00:58:01.920 It's like a check engine light is like your butthole.
00:58:05.040 And if a woman – if it's a woman doing the thing, you're like, you go check the engine.
00:58:09.500 Oh, the engine's a woman.
00:58:10.620 Okay, it's fine.
00:58:11.580 I'm good.
00:58:12.200 I'm not concerned.
00:58:13.680 Now, if it's a dude's dick in your ass, the car has broken down.
00:58:17.360 You're a fag.
00:58:18.280 Okay?
00:58:20.180 Have you ever had a check engine light that wasn't something wrong?
00:58:24.480 I mean, every time it's a check engine light.
00:58:25.240 Yeah, it's just concerning.
00:58:26.660 It's not a big deal.
00:58:28.040 It's a moral grazer.
00:58:29.080 You can still use it.
00:58:31.220 You're just in denial.
00:58:34.540 The check engine light came on.
00:58:35.880 No, you're in denial, man.
00:58:37.100 If your check engine light is on, there's something wrong.
00:58:39.820 My wife wanted to give me a pedicure, and I would rather have a pegging than that at that point.
00:58:44.220 And it felt dirty.
00:58:45.120 So I said no.
00:58:46.820 No.
00:58:47.860 A pedicure is less gay than getting something shoved in your ass.
00:58:51.360 At the time, it didn't feel like it.
00:58:54.700 The pegging felt way worse.
00:58:56.180 Well, I guess it's kind of like the – this is a lot like the old fucking hypothetical we had in the show of the Buck Angel versus Blair White.
00:59:05.780 Like, in a certain sense, it's technically not gay to bang Buck Angel.
00:59:10.720 It's technically not.
00:59:11.440 No, no, no, no.
00:59:12.640 The sense was –
00:59:13.580 No, no, no, no.
00:59:14.020 Listen to me.
00:59:14.800 Shut the fuck up.
00:59:15.780 Shut the fuck up.
00:59:17.260 In a weird way, like, it's not gay.
00:59:19.540 It's technically not gay.
00:59:20.860 But in a weird way, it's also in some other type of way also kind of more gay than banging Blair White.
00:59:27.820 Like, if that makes sense.
00:59:29.460 Like, because Blair White is a dude.
00:59:31.280 You think you're banging a guy, and your check engine light's on the whole time.
00:59:34.880 It just blurs in your face.
00:59:36.080 So, no, yeah.
00:59:36.840 So I said that, yes, banging Buck Angel is gayer than banging Blair White.
00:59:41.620 But they're like – it's almost like there's two different gays.
00:59:43.080 They're both gay, though.
00:59:43.800 Like, it's technically not gay to bang Buck Angel.
00:59:47.380 But in a weird way, in, like, another type of gay, it's also more gay.
00:59:51.200 Now, hey, Outlaw Barber did bring up a good point.
00:59:56.060 So Jack Murphy sitting on a giant dildo is not gay because his wife was present.
01:00:00.400 Yes.
01:00:01.000 Technically, yes.
01:00:01.860 Yes.
01:00:01.880 Critically, yes.
01:00:03.220 That is true.
01:00:03.700 I mean, even if his wife wasn't present, it wouldn't be gay.
01:00:07.780 It'd just be weird.
01:00:09.180 That's why you're wrong.
01:00:10.720 Penetration of the asshole is gay.
01:00:13.700 And also that goes –
01:00:14.900 But definitely gay is sex with another dude.
01:00:17.660 No, it also happens –
01:00:19.660 So you can shove whatever up you want of your bubble as long as it isn't a dude's dick or fingers.
01:00:25.620 Or whatever, and it's not gay.
01:00:27.380 So Cole is gay because he gets a boner from shitting.
01:00:31.380 So any penetration of the asshole in either direction means that you're gay.
01:00:36.380 But I guess –
01:00:37.220 See, you just reduct you out of certain of your own self.
01:00:39.320 You just, like, prove pooping is fucking gay.
01:00:42.400 You're right, I did.
01:00:43.900 I definitely did.
01:00:46.280 He said penetration, but then he said it both ways.
01:00:48.320 You can't anti-penetration.
01:00:49.200 Shitting is gay.
01:00:49.820 Well, you've never had a shit that comes back up a little bit, you know?
01:00:52.700 Yeah, a little bit.
01:00:53.360 All of a sudden, you're gay.
01:00:54.820 Like, you know –
01:00:55.260 Yeah, what are you doing in that bathroom every day?
01:00:57.480 Taking a shit, you homo?
01:00:58.720 Like, I feel like fucking Toad, the retard he is, with this argument.
01:01:02.060 One day, he pooped, and it went back in a little bit.
01:01:04.040 And then he's just standing in the mirror looking at himself like, oh, my God.
01:01:07.000 What have I become?
01:01:07.580 I'm a faggot now.
01:01:09.560 He's like, wait, I can do this to myself.
01:01:12.200 Anna Banana has a great –
01:01:13.480 She says, you can be gay and never have sex.
01:01:15.800 You can get pegged and not be gay.
01:01:18.440 100%.
01:01:18.840 The first part of that is definitely true.
01:01:22.440 The second part is also true.
01:01:24.540 Stop living in gaytopia in your head.
01:01:26.740 This is never going to be applicable.
01:01:28.640 I'm just –
01:01:29.420 Here's what I think.
01:01:31.300 I think from the space from your balls to your asshole, I think there's a sliding scale of how gay it is.
01:01:37.780 So you start from the balls, and the further the tongue goes to the asshole –
01:01:42.080 So I'm not saying it is gay if your wife or your girlfriend does it.
01:01:45.780 It's gayer, for sure.
01:01:46.440 What I'm saying is it's the gateway drug to gay.
01:01:48.800 It's the marijuana to crack pipeline.
01:01:51.420 Now she starts licking your butthole.
01:01:52.700 All of a sudden, she starts getting froggy, right?
01:01:54.400 You know I'm talking about, Cole.
01:01:55.480 Then she wants to start putting stuff in there.
01:01:57.220 It starts with a finger, maybe a pinky.
01:01:58.880 All of a sudden, you've got that fucking war hammer that that guy had before, and you guys are doing the experimentation.
01:02:04.460 Let me think of the best Big J bits.
01:02:09.360 It's on – you can go look it up.
01:02:10.860 It's on This Is Not Happening.
01:02:12.740 He talks about his first time he had sex, and a girl went down.
01:02:16.600 She went down on him, and she started sucking his balls.
01:02:19.200 Then he was like – and then she went lower than the balls.
01:02:21.940 You know, like balls.
01:02:23.960 Yeah, the paint.
01:02:24.920 Lower than the balls.
01:02:26.560 The lower the goes, the better it feels.
01:02:28.960 I'm not going to – although it is weird.
01:02:31.260 This is my theory.
01:02:32.220 I've always wanted to get my wife out of my butt hole, but she never would because she's not that dirty.
01:02:36.460 But like –
01:02:37.600 Because you're not gay, Jose.
01:02:39.220 Because you're not gay, bro.
01:02:40.360 No, no, no.
01:02:41.000 I would let her do it.
01:02:41.900 I'd let her do it.
01:02:42.300 You've got to clean your butt hole, man.
01:02:43.120 I don't give a shit.
01:02:43.920 But now listen.
01:02:44.720 Like if anything, though, like the further down you get – it's almost like too sensitive.
01:02:47.920 You know, like chicks, if like you immediately go for the clit.
01:02:50.420 Oh, yeah.
01:02:51.060 Like warm up.
01:02:51.780 It's like the same idea.
01:02:52.520 Like, whoa, you can't just go for there, you know?
01:02:54.480 Yeah, she immediately goes through your butt hole, clit.
01:02:57.800 That's working way too fast, man.
01:02:59.680 Maybe it's not that she's not that dirty.
01:03:01.720 You're just not that clean.
01:03:03.660 Right.
01:03:04.520 I don't know.
01:03:05.300 I don't know about y'all, man.
01:03:06.940 How much – whenever – now say about how gay y'all are, do you like clean your butt hole?
01:03:11.840 And if you do, do you ever go like a little bit up, you know, with the rag, with the nice soapy rag, do you ever go up a little bit?
01:03:19.240 What is that called again?
01:03:20.700 The trucker wipe or something?
01:03:22.660 I feel like it's weird you would even ask that.
01:03:25.160 I'm just wondering.
01:03:26.200 Like, you're talking about –
01:03:27.140 The marine wipe.
01:03:27.720 The marine wipe.
01:03:29.740 No, no, no, no.
01:03:30.480 Not that.
01:03:31.260 Not the – you have one piece of toilet paper and you stick your finger up your ass and pull it out.
01:03:36.120 Yeah, the marine wipe.
01:03:37.380 Yes.
01:03:39.020 No, I think the problem here is we're operating off of two different definitions of gay.
01:03:44.020 You have gay that is like literally sex with dudes, which is what gay is.
01:03:48.080 That is like the definition of it or being attracted to dudes.
01:03:51.520 Yeah.
01:03:51.660 Now, but then there's this other definition of like shit that we're like as dudes are like, oh, that's gay, bro.
01:03:55.860 Like this like bro, bro science gay or whatever the fuck you got going on.
01:04:00.140 Which is not giving your homies a tap on the balls.
01:04:03.380 No.
01:04:03.640 That's not gay either way.
01:04:05.980 No, a ball tap is gay.
01:04:07.980 Is getting a colonic gay?
01:04:10.380 Yeah, for sure.
01:04:11.800 From a truck side, yeah, rest stop?
01:04:14.560 Yeah.
01:04:15.480 Getting an anima is gay.
01:04:17.140 So –
01:04:19.040 Is taking a – like the thermometer up your butthole also gay?
01:04:24.000 Yes.
01:04:24.780 Do you have a fever and are you concerned about your –
01:04:27.540 Is every child now gay?
01:04:30.420 Like every –
01:04:30.800 I did not consent.
01:04:33.260 Shit.
01:04:34.040 We had to give my son –
01:04:35.600 I had to give my son a suppository and I was like this is –
01:04:38.240 Oh, fuck.
01:04:38.740 I was like I'm not making him gay doing this.
01:04:40.480 Oh, shit.
01:04:41.140 Well, your son wears panties so that ship is already set up.
01:04:46.740 Those are girls' diapers and we ran out, Toad.
01:04:50.900 Well, I might have to rethink this whole kids can't be trans thing now because if they're
01:04:56.500 getting rectal thermometers, they're gay.
01:04:58.420 So, fuck.
01:05:00.080 God.
01:05:00.400 I still like anything with a woman can – is like definitionally not gay because it's
01:05:07.360 not with a man.
01:05:08.360 So, it's like it cannot – like it's just – it's just opposites.
01:05:12.180 Do you guys genuinely think it's kind of weird to get your butthole looked by a chick?
01:05:15.500 Because I don't – I mean like weird in like a gay-ish way and that second definition
01:05:18.960 of gay because I don't.
01:05:20.300 It's weird.
01:05:21.260 It's just like why do I like this?
01:05:23.600 I don't know.
01:05:24.500 It's like borderline gay.
01:05:25.880 That's what they call –
01:05:26.180 Not my fault, God, for the G-spot.
01:05:27.580 Yeah, God.
01:05:28.200 That's – if you want to make an argument for God.
01:05:32.800 Yeah, yeah.
01:05:33.480 There's your argument against intelligent design.
01:05:35.660 God's going to make you a faggot.
01:05:38.660 Imagine if God was like, wait, wait.
01:05:40.780 You're not fucking other dudes?
01:05:42.860 Like what do you – no, no.
01:05:43.840 I put it there for a reason.
01:05:45.480 Yeah.
01:05:45.760 Wait, you're just fucking women?
01:05:47.240 Do you know how guys they are?
01:05:49.420 They're just for children.
01:05:50.380 You don't – no, no, no.
01:05:51.340 The fun part is the dudes.
01:05:53.520 He's the ultimate troll.
01:05:54.600 He put like the best feeling part in like right in your butthole and then he was like,
01:05:58.200 you can't touch it.
01:05:59.140 Well, that's – well, that's actually why it's called the G-spot because it's like
01:06:03.160 a place where you just hang out with your homies and have gay sex.
01:06:05.960 I mean, it's like some Middle Eastern countries.
01:06:07.940 It legit is like –
01:06:09.520 Hang out with the guys, the Gs.
01:06:13.600 No, I mean –
01:06:14.560 That is so great.
01:06:16.080 Some Middle Eastern countries –
01:06:16.800 Every like – man.
01:06:18.640 Wait, wait, wait.
01:06:19.480 Wait.
01:06:19.800 Just let him have that one, man.
01:06:21.180 One out of 100.
01:06:22.120 You fucking slammed it.
01:06:23.220 That was –
01:06:24.220 In some Middle Eastern countries, it legit is like a thing where culturally it's like
01:06:28.600 they basically do fuck dudes but in their weird mentality it's not gay because it's
01:06:33.600 like they don't like have this woman –
01:06:34.960 It's called warrior technology.
01:06:36.380 Yeah, warrior technology.
01:06:37.740 It's like –
01:06:38.380 Yeah, we're fucking dudes.
01:06:39.360 Just get our nut off and fucking chill with the homies and we don't –
01:06:42.140 Well, if it was gay, they would kill you too, so.
01:06:44.540 Yeah.
01:06:44.920 No, it's like to them it's like a different type of gay where it's like if you were trying
01:06:48.180 to like, I don't know, be with a dude and marry him and have a household and, you know,
01:06:51.740 do all that gay shit, they'd be like, what is wrong with you, faggot?
01:06:54.540 But no, like for them it's like women are like, yeah, stay away from you, you annoying
01:06:57.880 bitch.
01:06:58.320 Go take care of the kids and I'm going to go fuck Hector over here.
01:07:01.280 Like –
01:07:01.680 I don't know why I was going to say anything.
01:07:05.320 Let's bring this back to conspiracy.
01:07:06.700 We're talking about vibrations.
01:07:08.280 You guys know the chakras, right?
01:07:09.940 You got like the – what is this?
01:07:12.380 The third eye.
01:07:13.360 The pineal gland.
01:07:14.380 The heart chakra.
01:07:15.360 There's a chakra in your butthole.
01:07:16.500 This is all based on vibrations and stuff.
01:07:19.400 Wait, for real?
01:07:20.140 Are you being – are you trying to fuck with us or is that –
01:07:22.000 Wait, wait.
01:07:22.680 That's serious.
01:07:23.260 Do you ever skull fuck somebody's third eye?
01:07:27.160 What?
01:07:28.040 All right.
01:07:28.320 God, you –
01:07:28.880 God, you were just on a –
01:07:30.560 So, Toad, I'll give you some advice.
01:07:33.220 I was just watching Seinfeld.
01:07:35.220 Yes, that episode.
01:07:37.260 There's an episode where George, anytime – he gets – like whenever he hits the best
01:07:42.740 part, he leaves.
01:07:43.920 He leaves.
01:07:44.140 He ends it.
01:07:44.680 He's like, I'm done.
01:07:45.760 I did my high note.
01:07:47.220 I'm gone.
01:07:47.880 That's right.
01:07:48.360 And he was – his life got better.
01:07:50.560 Toad, that was like – you ended – you had the best joke of the night.
01:07:54.640 Hey, Toad, what about the one where he stops having sex and he becomes really smart?
01:07:59.340 Oh, yeah.
01:07:59.840 Yeah.
01:08:00.580 And then he fucks the teacher right before the presentation and he goes dumb again?
01:08:04.740 Yeah.
01:08:05.040 God, I love it.
01:08:07.540 Seinfeld's on Netflix, by the way, guys.
01:08:09.000 Just go watch Seinfeld.
01:08:09.860 It's so good.
01:08:10.480 I don't care what anybody says.
01:08:11.620 It's the best sitcom ever.
01:08:13.220 Is Black Mutualist having the thing over his thing to cover up this third eye?
01:08:17.400 I don't know.
01:08:18.020 That's what it is.
01:08:18.840 That is his third eye.
01:08:20.560 So that gay dude with the stone, I was judging him more for having – for being one of those
01:08:25.840 like stone people like with the gems and shit rather than what he puts in his butt.
01:08:30.020 Like that's like – apparently some of my friends put shit in their butt, but none
01:08:34.460 of my friends use crystals and stones.
01:08:37.320 So yeah.
01:08:37.780 I will be out here.
01:08:39.420 I have had – Elizabeth has put her finger up my ass.
01:08:42.020 That's how.
01:08:42.280 Oh, yeah, though.
01:08:43.800 Somebody clip that.
01:08:45.120 Clip that.
01:08:45.740 One hour, eight minutes.
01:08:47.340 Add it to the intro.
01:08:51.620 We need a new intro for sure.
01:08:54.460 Cole, what's her fingernail situation?
01:08:56.780 Because, I mean, that feels like something that she hasn't been able to clean off in years.
01:09:01.560 No, no, no.
01:09:01.960 This happened when we were dating, I want to say.
01:09:04.680 Wow.
01:09:04.920 And she just – she tried it out and then there was a little –
01:09:07.240 She tried it out.
01:09:08.420 Yeah.
01:09:09.600 You tried it out.
01:09:10.720 Let's be honest.
01:09:11.660 You ever notice when a chick has like one hand that doesn't have long fingernails and
01:09:16.940 the other one does?
01:09:17.740 And then you're like, oh, I know she masturbates with that hand.
01:09:21.240 That's not what I've never – I've never thought that before.
01:09:24.580 You've never thought that?
01:09:25.640 Oh.
01:09:26.260 Or the guy with the one long pinky because he either does coke or he counts his money with it.
01:09:30.780 I don't know.
01:09:31.500 Or because he puts it in his butthole.
01:09:33.140 I don't know.
01:09:35.000 Did she have nails on when she did it?
01:09:37.020 Like, do you have a Lee press on somewhere deep within Cole?
01:09:40.240 No.
01:09:40.960 Did she ask you?
01:09:42.420 Did she ask permission or did she just do it?
01:09:44.160 Right.
01:09:44.880 Let me guess.
01:09:45.860 I think she just did it.
01:09:47.060 Knowing your wife –
01:09:47.560 She just did it.
01:09:48.520 She 100% just did it.
01:09:49.080 Wait, wait, wait.
01:09:49.640 She was not like hovering around the butthole area or nothing?
01:09:52.560 Well, I think she did a little hovering and then she was just like whoop.
01:09:55.760 Great.
01:09:58.280 Because that's a ball to move just straight in there.
01:10:00.180 You got to kind of like –
01:10:02.360 Which finger?
01:10:04.500 Thumb?
01:10:06.040 I can't remember.
01:10:07.580 No, that would be very weird.
01:10:09.900 No, that would be –
01:10:10.500 Why?
01:10:10.840 She was probably –
01:10:11.440 She's behind you and she just went like this, right?
01:10:14.340 Oh, my God.
01:10:15.060 Actually, I'm 90% sure she was on top.
01:10:18.040 And she like leaned back and just went –
01:10:19.780 That's a –
01:10:20.160 Oh, my God, dude.
01:10:21.040 That actually –
01:10:21.580 You're helpless.
01:10:22.160 You're helpless back there.
01:10:22.900 I bet you that probably was amazing.
01:10:24.420 You're like, oh!
01:10:27.220 Oh!
01:10:29.580 Did you ask her why?
01:10:30.400 My dick would make it sound like a shotgun.
01:10:32.640 It like pumped.
01:10:33.300 It's like –
01:10:33.800 I don't know what it is.
01:10:36.240 It's like I can fuck for a long time.
01:10:37.920 There's certain positions and it's like my old lady knows if she gets in like on that almost immediately.
01:10:42.400 But now like –
01:10:43.000 So I can let him top.
01:10:44.020 Being on top is like one of them.
01:10:45.220 And like –
01:10:45.840 So if she did that and whoop, I'd be like –
01:10:47.340 You can break a –
01:10:49.220 You can legit break your dong doing that.
01:10:51.620 That lean back will kill you.
01:10:54.300 Oh, that's true.
01:10:55.020 I didn't think about that.
01:10:55.800 Oh, shit.
01:10:55.960 Yeah.
01:10:56.620 Well, then you stick a –
01:10:57.840 I don't have to pick up a penis to actually break it like that.
01:11:00.440 Oh, there you go.
01:11:01.460 It's like –
01:11:02.220 It's nice and strong because it's short.
01:11:04.200 You know, if you shave down there, it'll appear bigger.
01:11:07.020 Yeah.
01:11:07.820 Definitely true.
01:11:08.980 Like a strong stump.
01:11:11.260 Tyler, you know about moments and then –
01:11:14.140 Oh, yeah.
01:11:14.440 Yeah, exactly.
01:11:15.900 Yeah, moments.
01:11:16.660 I don't have a very large moment because my length isn't long.
01:11:21.160 I put something in the chat for you to read, and I think we're probably at a good point after that.
01:11:24.800 We probably can maybe start wrapping.
01:11:26.840 But someone from the Odyssey chat dropped something for us to play, and I think it'll probably be good.
01:11:32.420 But I'll take it.
01:11:33.060 We're not playing that other video, then, is what you're saying.
01:11:35.640 What other video?
01:11:36.340 No, we're our –
01:11:37.260 You're going to click on that link, Jose?
01:11:40.020 Yeah, I click on that link.
01:11:40.580 You're not going to play Cole's wedding video with the thumb in the ass?
01:11:43.640 The thumb in the ass.
01:11:45.460 Yeah, that was the wedding night for sure.
01:11:48.020 No, it was not.
01:11:49.000 I haven't had a finger in my ass since.
01:11:51.480 Oh, shit.
01:11:51.920 And then it was like one time because she got a little poopy on there, and she was like, no, no more.
01:11:57.860 And that's the reason why.
01:11:59.700 You look at a woman's butthole, it's nice and pristine, and then a guy's is just a hairy mess.
01:12:03.920 No, but is it, though?
01:12:05.980 No, that's why I shave it, man, because then you don't get the dingleberries, you know?
01:12:10.900 No, I'm talking about the woman.
01:12:12.360 Like, the porn stars, do they, like – are they constantly, like, cleaning this thing out?
01:12:16.960 They bleach.
01:12:17.280 That's a big deal.
01:12:18.600 They bleach it so it's white because we all want a white woman's ass.
01:12:23.020 Yeah, we want a nice, pink.
01:12:24.740 That's how you know you're watching good amateur porn when the butthole is a little bit darker.
01:12:28.300 You know, that's when you know you've got the good –
01:12:29.180 Yeah, yeah, dude.
01:12:30.700 I want the butthole of color.
01:12:33.220 I feel like most chicks probably shave that.
01:12:35.040 The AOC, the anus of color.
01:12:41.960 All right.
01:12:44.120 All right, let's roll that beautiful bean footage.
01:12:47.100 I do know girls that do wax, though, completely Brazilian.
01:12:51.540 How is your mom?
01:12:52.520 I'm not talking about wax.
01:12:56.100 I'm talking about, like, water, like, flushing it up there, getting the shit out.
01:13:00.720 Because there's got to be shit in your inner walls and all that stuff, right?
01:13:02.960 Like an enema or a colonna?
01:13:04.540 No, I don't think shit kind of stays up on your, like, in there like that.
01:13:08.080 Unless you need to shit.
01:13:09.340 Oh, it does.
01:13:10.180 It does, dude.
01:13:10.340 No, no, no, not, like, on, like, the sides of the walls and shit.
01:13:13.320 Oh, you ever going to call an oscarity?
01:13:15.020 I don't believe that.
01:13:15.780 You got to flush that thing out for a game.
01:13:16.640 You ever heard about Elvis Presley had, like, 65 pounds of mud?
01:13:23.100 Wait, like, because he was eating cheeseburgers on the fucking –
01:13:27.220 I don't know.
01:13:27.820 It's true.
01:13:28.000 It's true.
01:13:28.760 But back in the day –
01:13:30.060 What's that?
01:13:31.080 That UFC show, remember?
01:13:32.760 Like, they had, like, the Ultimate Fighter?
01:13:34.540 Like, one of the guys to make weight got a –
01:13:37.200 whatever it is, like, an enema or something, and he cleaned out his butthole.
01:13:40.620 And, like, the shit that came out, he lost a pound and made weight.
01:13:43.240 No shit.
01:13:44.500 I jerked off once to make weight when I was in wrestling in high school.
01:13:47.760 No, you didn't.
01:13:48.800 I absolutely did.
01:13:49.920 And the weirdest part is my coach kind of wink-winked suggested it.
01:13:56.000 He was – because I was like, dude, I've been running the sauna suit all day.
01:13:59.080 I'm, like, a few ounces overweight.
01:14:01.560 I'm, like, I've been spitting all day.
01:14:03.820 I haven't barely drank any water.
01:14:05.180 And he's like, well, I mean, there's other fluids in your body.
01:14:08.040 And I'm like, what?
01:14:10.080 I mean, I'm not going to say more.
01:14:12.200 I was like, what?
01:14:13.220 And I was like, all right.
01:14:15.620 Jose, you're not getting it.
01:14:16.800 He wanted you to jerk off his face.
01:14:18.820 That's it.
01:14:19.080 Yeah, you know.
01:14:20.560 He didn't want you to take a shit.
01:14:22.280 He wanted you to –
01:14:23.320 We all saw that wrestling movie with Steve Carell.
01:14:26.240 Yeah.
01:14:26.420 That makes me think that, like, you know, whenever they –
01:14:30.540 Actually, for the UFC, they try to go make weight.
01:14:32.980 And they stand up there, and they're completely naked behind the –
01:14:36.600 Like, they bring towels out.
01:14:38.420 Oh, yeah, yeah.
01:14:39.340 I just, like, can think of the guy on there.
01:14:41.180 He's just, like, jerking off right before, like, in the towel.
01:14:43.980 He's, like –
01:14:44.480 And he's nuts.
01:14:45.280 And all this thing.
01:14:45.660 You just, like, see it going to be like –
01:14:46.840 That's, like, mind game shit.
01:14:48.340 150.1 pounds.
01:14:50.620 It goes, boop, 150 pounds.
01:14:51.980 It's like, made weight, bitch.
01:14:53.860 That's, like, mind game shit, dude.
01:14:55.120 A lot of dudes, like, especially, like, high school wrestling,
01:14:57.580 a lot of dudes would not weigh in naked.
01:14:59.380 But, like, that was one of the first tips I got from, like,
01:15:01.920 when I started wrestling.
01:15:02.740 Like, a lot of, like, the senior guys, like, always weigh in naked.
01:15:05.080 It's a complete mind fuck.
01:15:06.500 Because, like, it's like a –
01:15:08.780 You just fuck with their mind.
01:15:10.400 Especially people you know when they're in weight class
01:15:11.920 and are, like, coming to you.
01:15:12.860 If you're just unabashedly walking up there naked,
01:15:14.800 getting on the scale, they're like,
01:15:16.160 holy shit, this dude don't give a fuck.
01:15:17.400 Bro, wait, wait.
01:15:17.600 Do you walk out naked?
01:15:19.300 Completely naked?
01:15:20.360 It's not like a UFC thing where you're, like, on a stage.
01:15:23.680 It's, like, it's in the locker room.
01:15:25.480 Most people weigh in on their briefs
01:15:26.860 or cover their dick like a little faggot.
01:15:29.960 But, like, no, you just walk in your dick out.
01:15:31.440 Oh, you're, like, in a locker room
01:15:32.340 and you're just, like, letting it hang, dude.
01:15:34.140 Oh, yeah.
01:15:34.520 Just, like, that's the move.
01:15:35.920 That's the move.
01:15:36.700 It's like –
01:15:37.220 What if you're more men?
01:15:38.180 Do you have to take off the shirt and the underwear?
01:15:40.980 Oh, yeah.
01:15:41.320 I don't know.
01:15:41.900 You know the old men just don't give a shit in the locker room?
01:15:44.860 It's like that.
01:15:45.640 That's the move.
01:15:46.200 Dude, that's an alpha move.
01:15:47.480 It's a lemon party.
01:15:48.900 Yeah.
01:15:49.320 Dude, that's –
01:15:49.860 Lemon party.
01:15:51.420 When I was at the military door, one of my roommates,
01:15:54.020 I would always, whenever he left his laptop out,
01:15:55.740 I would change his background to lemon party scenes.
01:15:57.960 Oh, fuck.
01:15:58.520 Yeah.
01:15:59.660 We would do that with Tub Girl, mostly.
01:16:03.080 But, all right.
01:16:03.580 Let's play that shit, dude.
01:16:04.880 All right.
01:16:05.140 Yeah, what was that?
01:16:06.140 I got to work early in the morning.
01:16:07.220 I want to get out of here.
01:16:08.060 We'll see.
01:16:10.120 He's got guys' balls to tickle.
01:16:12.060 I am not gay.
01:16:17.140 I have relationships with women and sex with men.
01:16:21.380 And I got new people.
01:16:23.100 That means you're gay.
01:16:31.300 That's amazing.
01:16:33.620 That was actually from –
01:16:35.340 There you go.
01:16:36.360 Yeah, Ice Team, man.
01:16:37.380 He knows what he's talking about.
01:16:38.120 So that was actually from Law & Order?
01:16:41.100 Yeah.
01:16:41.700 Jesus.
01:16:42.480 I'm going to have to disagree with you there.
01:16:44.240 I'm just kidding.
01:16:44.840 That dude just got –
01:16:46.060 He got iced tea bag, man.
01:16:48.740 Oh, okay.
01:16:49.520 Oh.
01:16:50.460 I'll laugh at that one.
01:16:51.380 Let's throw up flugs.
01:16:52.340 No, no, no.
01:16:52.840 I do have a question before we go.
01:16:54.860 Like, this –
01:16:55.880 Because the whole, like –
01:16:57.620 Jose, I guess this is pushing our logical thought on this.
01:17:02.040 Like, it's not gay if there's a woman involved.
01:17:04.040 If there's two –
01:17:04.700 If it is a gangbang and two guys fucking a girl,
01:17:08.220 is it –
01:17:09.280 Not gay.
01:17:09.920 Not gay because a woman is involved.
01:17:10.480 No, if there's, like, penetrating –
01:17:11.580 Like, if the dude's sucking your dick,
01:17:13.280 you can't just be like,
01:17:13.940 Oh, it's not gay.
01:17:14.480 There's a chick right there.
01:17:15.500 Like, no, it's gay, dude.
01:17:17.000 Yeah, well, if the penis is touched,
01:17:18.700 it's definitely gay.
01:17:19.680 No, no.
01:17:20.580 Okay, that's weird, but still not gay.
01:17:23.620 No, it's gay at that point.
01:17:25.160 Dude, you –
01:17:25.900 All right, come back to us when you got a crumb of pussy,
01:17:28.520 and we'll talk, all right?
01:17:29.320 If there's some beefing going on, it's fucking gay.
01:17:32.580 I guess the only –
01:17:33.540 Now, would it be gay –
01:17:34.660 I don't know if I made this up because I made this joke in the group chat.
01:17:38.220 If you, like, Robin Hood the guy or the girl, I guess.
01:17:42.520 So, like, the dude is fucking the girl from behind,
01:17:45.160 and then you go up and you fuck him in his ass,
01:17:47.620 and then she feels it, and you Robin Hood him.
01:17:50.320 I guess there's a vagina by extension.
01:17:56.120 You'd have to say it's, at the very least, bi.
01:18:00.180 But it's definitely gay.
01:18:01.080 On the real, as anyone –
01:18:02.140 I'll say it.
01:18:03.100 I'll go ahead and say it.
01:18:03.840 I've double-teamed a chick.
01:18:04.700 We didn't DP just because, like, that's –
01:18:06.680 I don't know.
01:18:07.040 For one, the positioning of that is just weird.
01:18:09.660 Yeah, the dicks are close, man.
01:18:10.940 It is weird.
01:18:12.380 There's only a team separated.
01:18:14.400 Eiffel Tower?
01:18:15.260 Eiffel Tower, what you did?
01:18:16.300 I will adamantly say it's still not gay,
01:18:19.200 but it's, like, it's too close for comfort.
01:18:22.040 I don't want to feel another dude's balls on my balls.
01:18:24.280 That's weird.
01:18:25.540 But, like, it's not gay, but it's weird.
01:18:28.120 Yes, it is.
01:18:28.740 Wait, so, again, did you spit roaster?
01:18:31.260 Is that what happened?
01:18:32.320 Yeah, okay.
01:18:33.400 But, anyway, I'm just curious.
01:18:34.300 Have any of you guys ever double-teamed a chick or no?
01:18:35.880 Am I the only one?
01:18:37.260 No.
01:18:37.700 It's none of your business.
01:18:38.880 Yeah.
01:18:40.400 That's a yes!
01:18:43.380 Tyler's like, well, does it count if it wasn't a chick in the middle?
01:18:46.340 Yeah.
01:18:49.200 Tyler was lucky to be in the middle?
01:18:50.820 Does it count if he called himself a chick, basically?
01:18:53.880 I'm just imagining somebody who has someone who has a poor grasp on the English language
01:18:59.500 listening to this episode, and they must only catch, like, the words gay and fuck
01:19:04.780 and be like, I don't know what else is going on, but this is all right.
01:19:07.680 Spud's down there saying she's catching up.
01:19:09.540 Lots of pegging.
01:19:10.360 Gay.
01:19:11.000 Check engine discussion.
01:19:12.860 Yeah.
01:19:13.560 Yeah, Spud doesn't speak English.
01:19:14.700 It is astounding, though.
01:19:16.440 I've talked to a lot of dudes who will, like, adamantly be like, yeah, double-teaming chick's
01:19:19.920 gay.
01:19:20.700 There's another dude around.
01:19:21.920 I'm like, why are you so worried about it?
01:19:23.600 Just take your hole, focus on that, and just go to town.
01:19:26.480 The closest I've ever gotten to, which, technically, I'm guessing it would be an orgy, is I, we were
01:19:34.280 in a Jeep, and there was a couple in the front.
01:19:38.160 That's already gay.
01:19:39.060 Me and Elizabeth in the back, and we were both fucking, and, like, the only thing that
01:19:47.620 was separating us is we put up a beach towel, like, in between, but, like, we were completely
01:19:51.760 Why do you even bother?
01:19:52.840 That's just teenagers.
01:19:54.580 We were in college, but it was-
01:19:56.380 Hold on.
01:19:57.800 Can you guys highlight Atloa Barber, his last comment here?
01:20:01.440 Yeah.
01:20:01.900 I just love the- Okay, so, not gay, I fucked a stripper with a homie of mine.
01:20:05.320 And I just love the justification that it's not gay because he-
01:20:08.700 Because I did it.
01:20:09.500 But no reason.
01:20:11.960 You're fucking gay, bro!
01:20:15.000 No, so, I think it becomes gay if you start doing something with a dude, or something penetrates
01:20:19.980 your ass, then it's gay.
01:20:21.200 But, okay, but you, okay, well, but then you, by your own logic, you were saying, DP, like,
01:20:26.060 you were saying if you even touch, it's gay.
01:20:29.060 Like, which is-
01:20:29.520 I said if your penis is touched, it's gay.
01:20:31.920 What if her mouth is getting tired, and so you have to pull out, and to keep you hard,
01:20:38.860 he has to use his mouth, or give you a little couple jerks.
01:20:42.560 He's just, like, he's just fluffing.
01:20:44.600 He's just doing a little-
01:20:45.500 He's totally not gay, bro.
01:20:46.360 I'm just helping you, buddy.
01:20:47.840 Yeah, it's just helping you, bro.
01:20:49.400 It's magically gay all of a sudden.
01:20:50.660 It's totally not gay, man.
01:20:51.780 You're super illogical, Toad, all right?
01:20:54.140 Important if you have a male fluffer, that's not gay, man.
01:20:56.540 It's just like having a doctor touch your dick.
01:20:58.500 Now, have anybody had my thing where it was, like, another couple in the same room as you
01:21:04.100 fucking at the same time?
01:21:05.420 Who cares?
01:21:05.940 I was in high school.
01:21:07.120 Okay, did you try to compete?
01:21:08.560 Did you try to compete, though?
01:21:09.800 Would you be like-
01:21:10.300 Yeah, dude.
01:21:10.580 You have to, man.
01:21:11.580 It's like a drag race.
01:21:12.660 You feel like moon real fucking mad.
01:21:14.020 It's not a drag race.
01:21:15.700 Oh.
01:21:16.200 Toad's in there.
01:21:17.060 I'm gonna go as fast as I can.
01:21:19.400 I finished so much quicker than you, dude.
01:21:21.540 Fuck you.
01:21:22.100 I'm so much better.
01:21:22.960 Oh, my God.
01:21:28.020 Oh, my God.
01:21:28.680 You just both start to shit.
01:21:31.240 Oh, my God.
01:21:32.240 I don't know.
01:21:32.620 Fucking when another person-
01:21:33.780 Like, that's, like, high school shit.
01:21:34.980 Like, that's not a big deal.
01:21:35.900 That's nothing.
01:21:37.080 Yeah.
01:21:37.320 That's whatever.
01:21:38.300 This all feels like it's-
01:21:41.020 You guys are making a test so you can have a checklist of making sure you're not gay
01:21:45.200 at some point, right?
01:21:46.140 Yeah.
01:21:46.300 Hey.
01:21:46.560 I'm taking this back to this one right after this.
01:21:49.100 I want to do DP just to spite tone.
01:21:51.540 Every app that I take, man, I have to make sure.
01:21:55.200 Like, I have the checklist, daily checklist.
01:21:57.240 Like, what am I doing?
01:21:58.060 Is this gay?
01:21:58.860 I gotta make sure it's not.
01:22:00.620 And you know what?
01:22:01.320 That is gay.
01:22:02.380 Oh.
01:22:02.740 Yeah.
01:22:03.400 It really is.
01:22:03.960 If you're that concerned about being gay, it's pretty fucking gay.
01:22:06.360 Fuck, I have to put making a gay checklist on the checklist.
01:22:08.980 Being so paranoid that you're doing something gay or are gay.
01:22:13.480 Oh, no, our dick's touching gay now.
01:22:16.800 Oh, no, my dick is in his ass.
01:22:18.840 Oh, no.
01:22:19.560 Oh, no.
01:22:19.940 Oh, no.
01:22:20.440 Oh, no.
01:22:21.540 But his ass was shaved, so we're good.
01:22:28.000 Oh, he blew a load of my mouth.
01:22:30.000 Oh, I'm so gay.
01:22:31.200 Not really.
01:22:32.240 Not fucking really, dude.
01:22:34.140 There was a girl next door.
01:22:35.960 It's like that video we saw.
01:22:37.480 That guy was not convincing.
01:22:38.900 He's like, I really like to have sexual relations with women's pussies.
01:22:43.540 Vaginas.
01:22:44.380 Ice tea?
01:22:45.060 What is it?
01:22:45.580 I don't know.
01:22:46.420 Was that me?
01:22:47.260 Honestly, in a certain weird way, bi dudes are, like, kind of, like, the least gay in a weird way.
01:22:54.360 Because they just don't give a fuck.
01:22:55.220 They just don't want a hole.
01:22:55.820 They don't even care.
01:22:56.680 Like, give me a hole, though.
01:22:57.520 What's that, like, 4chan thread that gay porn is the least gay porn you can watch?
01:23:04.680 And it was, like, straight porn is gay because there's a dude involved.
01:23:09.980 Like, I think it was, like, lesbian porn is gay because there's, like, you're watching, like...
01:23:16.140 No, it's what it is.
01:23:17.440 I think it was Mark Norman or one of those guys who were saying it.
01:23:20.560 He's like, tranny porn is the least gay.
01:23:23.920 Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
01:23:25.420 It kind of is.
01:23:26.500 Well, no, this was on Joe Rogan.
01:23:27.820 They mentioned it.
01:23:28.320 I totally agree with this.
01:23:30.000 Like, tranny porn is less gay than, like, regular porn.
01:23:32.880 Wait, it depends what kind of tranny porn.
01:23:35.500 Yeah, none of those faggy bitches to gay it up.
01:23:37.340 I don't know.
01:23:37.700 I didn't really stick around.
01:23:43.500 That's a great place to end it right there.
01:23:45.100 All right, let's drop plugs, Tyler.
01:23:46.600 What you got?
01:23:48.420 Plugs?
01:23:48.960 Pegging?
01:23:49.720 Just me, Tyler Yonke.
01:23:51.400 Libertarian Podcast Review.
01:23:53.500 Find me on Twitter.
01:23:54.320 I'm at right at 1,500 followers.
01:23:56.520 Get me higher.
01:23:57.520 I keep going up to, like, 1,505 and then down to...
01:24:00.760 Tyler, are you ever going to get on any type of, like, Rakita LOL or any of those, like,
01:24:06.920 cool guys that do LOL that you do also?
01:24:09.480 No, as an example, like, you know, I know Top Lobsters mentioned, hey, Tyler's in the
01:24:13.960 group chat just jerking around, and yes, I get in there, and then I get busy, like,
01:24:19.240 today, a really busy day, and then you sent me a message saying, hey, all the other
01:24:22.900 losers have crapped out.
01:24:24.340 How about joining us?
01:24:26.560 Maybe I should get on there, but I'm busy working or goofing off with you guys, so, you
01:24:31.080 know, that's what it is.
01:24:32.940 Oh, yeah.
01:24:34.140 I'm not that brilliant of an attorney.
01:24:36.660 Oh, that's not what it is?
01:24:38.440 Well, at least you do your job.
01:24:40.180 I'm pretty sure the YouTube attorneys don't even have a job.
01:24:43.340 There's no way they do.
01:24:44.800 We crack the code.
01:24:45.700 Oh, Tyler doesn't do other law shows and shit or play in that lane, because he can
01:24:50.040 shine in this circle as the libertarian lawyer.
01:24:52.560 When he starts going to Rakita Law, it's going to expose that way to what he is.
01:24:57.480 I know we're getting out of here, but two things.
01:24:59.440 One is I do family law.
01:25:00.700 It doesn't really correlate much.
01:25:02.340 I mean, the Johnny Depp stuff did, actually, because I do a lot of domestic violence restraining
01:25:06.520 order stuff.
01:25:07.600 And then the other thing is I work.
01:25:10.420 I do legitimate work.
01:25:11.420 Those guys, they make more money than me doing YouTube, and I have like 180 followers,
01:25:17.760 so it doesn't happen.
01:25:18.920 It's crazy.
01:25:19.960 They literally stream other trials.
01:25:23.960 They stream other people's trials and just sit there.
01:25:26.900 They don't even do shit.
01:25:28.020 They armchair lawyer it and make more money, probably, than the lawyer that they're watching,
01:25:33.900 which is hilarious to me.
01:25:35.540 A lot of times.
01:25:36.640 I mean, they're not dumb, though.
01:25:38.000 They're good at what they're doing.
01:25:39.260 Oh, no.
01:25:39.540 Yeah.
01:25:39.940 But there's so many of them.
01:25:41.740 I could have, like, whenever you watch those streams and they have like eight lawyers watching.
01:25:46.640 Like, do you not even have practices?
01:25:48.380 Jesus.
01:25:49.600 I actually asked David Brady because he interviewed Rakeda, and Rakeda asked him the question,
01:25:54.680 you know, and he's like, I'm still a legit attorney.
01:25:57.140 I just have no cases because I do YouTube.
01:26:01.820 Oh, okay.
01:26:02.540 Wow.
01:26:02.860 I didn't.
01:26:03.180 Okay.
01:26:03.460 So he actually doesn't have any.
01:26:05.040 Yeah.
01:26:05.660 Top, go ahead.
01:26:06.460 Drop your shit.
01:26:06.860 Yeah, I was just going to add on to what Tyler said.
01:26:10.840 When I'm in that chat, I see, like, Tyler.
01:26:13.560 I'm like, Tyler doesn't really belong here.
01:26:14.820 It might be a little too smart.
01:26:15.920 But then you'll see on the other side of Adam Nutter.
01:26:18.620 I'm like, Adam Nutter belongs here.
01:26:21.040 He's actually, he might not even be smart enough to be in this chat.
01:26:24.180 Anyway, toplobs.com, toplobs underscore on Twitter.
01:26:28.560 Follow me, whatever.
01:26:29.400 Buy some shit.
01:26:30.880 All right.
01:26:31.720 All right.
01:26:32.120 And I have the No Way Jose show.
01:26:34.220 The big thing I want to plug right now is my OKC series.
01:26:37.260 It's like, it started out, I was just going to do, like, one episode.
01:26:39.720 And there's so much information.
01:26:41.380 The guest I have, Richard Booth, has, you know, spent so much time researching this shit
01:26:45.620 and has so much good info that it's legit probably going to be, like, a five or six episode series
01:26:49.880 at this point.
01:26:51.240 So check it out.
01:26:52.240 If you're someone interested in the OKC bombing thing, and especially the conspiracy around it.
01:26:57.340 And we're not going to, like, we joke around, like, and we went into a lot of kooky conspiracy shit here.
01:27:01.400 All the stuff we're going over is stuff that's well-sourced.
01:27:03.980 And even the stuff we do bring up that's a little bit in kooky territory,
01:27:06.920 we're being super objective about it, slapping down the shit that sounds ridiculous.
01:27:10.900 So, like, yeah.
01:27:12.660 And I want to start focusing more on a lot of shit like that, like, real conspiracy stuff,
01:27:17.360 like, that has, like, shit to back it up, not just conjecture, you know,
01:27:21.100 fucking playing with numbers and gay shit like that.
01:27:23.760 But, yeah, go check that out.
01:27:25.420 I really think you should.
01:27:26.600 It's fucking great stuff.
01:27:28.160 But, yeah.
01:27:28.740 And then also, if you'll follow me on Twitter, I'm back on Twitter now.
01:27:33.020 You know, I broke 3,000 and got hit for Banavision again.
01:27:35.980 But I'm rebuilding again.
01:27:38.200 I'm at SenorJose.
01:27:41.240 But, yeah.
01:27:42.220 Then also, if you want to, I would suggest start – maybe if you, like, follow me on Facebook
01:27:45.880 because I'll probably inevitably get nuked again unless Elon takes over.
01:27:49.360 So, on Facebook, I'm just my name.
01:27:51.160 That way, if you ever want to contact me for any reason, you can there.
01:27:53.960 I also have a Facebook page for the show, No Way Jose.
01:27:56.640 But, yeah, that's all I got.
01:27:57.820 You two?
01:27:59.500 Tyler, you said you had something really quick.
01:28:01.620 I do a Kill Tony knockoff show once a month or so, and it's next – it's tomorrow.
01:28:06.580 So, find us.
01:28:07.500 If you guys want to be on, anybody wants to be on, send me a DM on Twitter,
01:28:10.980 and we'll put you in the show.
01:28:11.800 You have a minute to say anything, anything, and then talk to you.
01:28:15.320 And then we kick you off and make fun of you.
01:28:17.260 So, if any of you guys here especially want to join, let me know.
01:28:20.340 And if any of you go on the show and just repeat the N-word over and over again for a minute,
01:28:25.220 we'll let you come on as a guest for Tower Power Hour.
01:28:27.520 Yes, you will.
01:28:28.400 Yeah, actually, yeah.
01:28:29.560 Why not?
01:28:30.780 Yikes.
01:28:32.380 I also got banned again, just like Jose.
01:28:34.900 I haven't been on in two weeks.
01:28:36.320 Again, like I said, because of other random shit.
01:28:38.260 But since then, I've already had a other backup that I made months – almost a year ago, probably now.
01:28:45.960 It's called – it's Noda No. 4 POTUS, I want to say.
01:28:50.020 I think it's Noda for P.
01:28:51.720 Noda for P.
01:28:52.500 That's actually – it was around – it was a very, very short-lived joke that I did a whole thing.
01:29:00.000 I know I need to change it.
01:29:03.300 I just don't know what to change it to.
01:29:04.420 I haven't figured out what I should change it to yet.
01:29:06.120 Noda for Taint.
01:29:06.740 If you have any good names, I could use Noda for Taint.
01:29:12.760 But, yeah, you can find me on Twitter on there, and then I'm not going to be missing any more podcasts.
01:29:19.000 But, yeah.
01:29:20.600 Toadfish.
01:29:20.960 Yeah.
01:29:22.180 Anarcho underscore Toad on Twitter.
01:29:23.880 You can catch me getting in ridiculous Twitter fights because I don't like drag queens shoving their junk kids' faces, basically.
01:29:32.560 What the fuck, dude?
01:29:33.500 Ruined our timelines for the past two days.
01:29:36.180 But he likes contemplating what's gay and not.
01:29:38.580 Yeah, well, yeah.
01:29:39.880 Everybody that argues against me is obviously gay, so that's what's going on there.
01:29:45.020 Tower Power Hour, we're back next week, next Wednesday, with another episode, which I believe Melissa Diaz is coming on.
01:29:51.660 Is that still the schedule?
01:29:53.400 All right, fuck yeah.
01:29:54.440 She's a comedian.
01:29:55.380 It's going to be funny.
01:29:56.220 Let's fucking do it.
01:29:57.020 We'll continue this timeline with the good Tower Power Hour episodes because we have Cole back, and he's the cum that holds us together.
01:30:06.240 Yeah, the cum is back.
01:30:07.480 And go check out our fucking Holocaust revision episode where we prove the Holocaust is fake and gay.
01:30:13.020 That never actually happened, Jose.
01:30:16.380 Lots of taint licking in the Holocaust.
01:30:19.200 It's called Five Poop Diamonds.
01:30:21.340 Go check that out.
01:30:23.100 It was only on Odyssey.
01:30:24.700 It was our finale.
01:30:26.100 I just want to plug that for one, to get you on Odyssey, and two, because it was a banger episode, and the Holocaust has allowed the Jews to control us, and we need to break this spell.
01:30:35.800 Jesus.
01:30:36.540 Damn it.
01:30:37.000 Now this episode is nuked, Derek.
01:30:39.800 Even every time I come on here, you guys get wiped off of YouTube, and here we are again.
01:30:44.520 But this German doesn't approve of that, so go ahead.
01:30:47.300 Well, all right.
01:30:48.420 I'm just trying to vindicate my grandpa, my old grandpa.
01:30:51.160 See you, homie.
01:30:52.200 Well, we just talked about the Jews, and we're going to bookend this episode by saying nuker.
01:30:56.600 See you.