TRIGGERnometry - November 15, 2023


Jay Leno - Comedy, Cars & Stories From My Life


Episode Stats

Length

1 hour and 1 minute

Words per Minute

190.0578

Word Count

11,652

Sentence Count

1,153

Misogynist Sentences

36

Hate Speech Sentences

21


Summary

Summaries generated with gmurro/bart-large-finetuned-filtered-spotify-podcast-summ .

Transcript

Transcript generated with Whisper (turbo).
Misogyny classifications generated with MilaNLProc/bert-base-uncased-ear-misogyny .
Hate speech classifications generated with facebook/roberta-hate-speech-dynabench-r4-target .
00:00:00.700 Broadway's smash hit, The Neil Diamond Musical, A Beautiful Noise, is coming to Toronto.
00:00:06.520 The true story of a kid from Brooklyn destined for something more, featuring all the songs you love,
00:00:11.780 including America, Forever in Blue Jeans, and Sweet Caroline.
00:00:15.780 Like Jersey Boys and Beautiful, the next musical mega hit is here, The Neil Diamond Musical, A Beautiful Noise.
00:00:22.600 Now through June 7th, 2026 at the Princess of Wales Theatre.
00:00:26.800 Get tickets at murbish.com.
00:00:31.000 Broadway's smash hit, The Neil Diamond Musical, A Beautiful Noise, is coming to Toronto.
00:00:36.860 The true story of a kid from Brooklyn destined for something more, featuring all the songs you love,
00:00:42.120 including America, Forever in Blue Jeans, and Sweet Caroline.
00:00:46.120 Like Jersey Boys and Beautiful, the next musical mega hit is here, The Neil Diamond Musical, A Beautiful Noise.
00:00:52.980 April 28th through June 7th, 2026, the Princess of Wales Theatre.
00:00:57.440 Get tickets at murbish.com.
00:01:00.000 Based on what you're saying, you sound like a really nice guy, Jay.
00:01:03.700 Hey, fuck you.
00:01:06.720 Billy the bouncer stabbed him in the leg with a knife, and the guy's bleeding.
00:01:10.820 So they gave him 20 bucks, put him in the cab, sent him off.
00:01:13.640 Okay.
00:01:13.880 The world you're describing, particularly from the early days, is so different to the world that we have now.
00:01:21.540 Yeah, it is different.
00:01:22.480 But I mean, that's, is it progress?
00:01:24.440 I don't know.
00:01:25.500 A rape joke has the same career penalty as an actual rape.
00:01:29.940 That doesn't seem fair.
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00:02:58.640 Jay, thank you so much for coming on the show.
00:03:00.520 Well, thanks for having me.
00:03:01.460 As everyone can tell, you're a fan of cars.
00:03:03.780 We'll get to that.
00:03:04.620 Yeah.
00:03:05.120 We'll get to that.
00:03:05.840 But before that, look, I remember growing up and your show was so well established.
00:03:09.720 You were hugely popular.
00:03:11.160 But people of my generation and younger wouldn't have followed your journey from the beginning.
00:03:15.560 So we always love to get people like you to tell us your story.
00:03:17.980 How did you get into comedy and stand-up and all of that?
00:03:21.480 Well, I grew up in a rural area.
00:03:23.460 I was born in New York City, in New York rather.
00:03:26.100 When I was nine, we moved to Andover, Massachusetts, which is about 30 miles north of Boston, kind of rural area.
00:03:31.800 So the idea of going into show business, you know, my mother is from Scotland.
00:03:39.800 And to the day she died, she never understood what I did, you know.
00:03:44.680 I can remember I had my Aunt Nettie, a Scottish name.
00:03:49.240 And I heard my mother phone.
00:03:51.260 Obviously, my Aunt Nettie said, what's Jay doing now?
00:03:54.040 And she said, well, he has a little skit that he puts on from town to town.
00:03:58.960 And I'm going, Ma, I don't, like I'd stand in town square and I sort of do a dance or something.
00:04:03.920 There's no conception of, I mean, it's the kind of place where people go, Kathy's boy wants to be a comedian.
00:04:10.700 It just didn't seem like a viable profession.
00:04:13.520 You know, you come to Los Angeles and you meet nine-year-old kids who want to be lighting directors because their dad is or their uncle is.
00:04:19.660 So they're all in the business.
00:04:20.720 But growing up in a small town, you worked at the sneaker factory or you worked at the plant or you were a teacher or something of that nature.
00:04:30.160 So the idea of going into show business really did not seem like a viable alternative.
00:04:34.820 And how did you end up going into show?
00:04:37.060 I mean, that must be quite a…
00:04:38.220 Well, I went to school in Boston.
00:04:39.280 And Boston had thousands of students with no money willing to be entertained by people with no talent.
00:04:46.580 The colleges, they would put a candle in the cafeteria.
00:04:50.580 It would become the Two-Toe Cafe.
00:04:52.660 And this was the late 60s, early 70s.
00:04:56.440 And it was a pretty serious time.
00:04:58.480 It was mostly folks saying, stop your war machine, man.
00:05:01.620 And they would have a flashlight under their chin.
00:05:03.740 It would be dark.
00:05:04.540 Stop your war machine.
00:05:05.660 And they'd run over there.
00:05:06.860 Stop your war machine.
00:05:07.800 And it's like this sort of alternative experimental.
00:05:10.420 So the idea of doing stand-up didn't really even seem like, what, it was not something people thought was a viable alternative.
00:05:19.220 Then George Carlin started to come in and then Robert Clinton.
00:05:23.580 Because, see, prior to that, most comedians, and I imagine the same thing in England, were men in their 40s or 50s, grew up during either the war or in America during the Depression.
00:05:34.920 Times are rough.
00:05:35.960 Kids with the long hair so long, the pants are through them tight.
00:05:38.420 These hippies, all that kind.
00:05:39.760 And then suddenly I had this younger generation talking about things that I understood.
00:05:44.560 You know, I remember George Carlin's Class Clown album.
00:05:47.920 That's sort of what ignited me.
00:05:49.320 I remember hearing it.
00:05:51.060 And I would recite it, not on stage.
00:05:54.460 And then to get into it, I would put my own stories at the end.
00:05:58.640 I would do his routine just to get the rhythm in my bedroom or something.
00:06:03.500 And then I'd put my own story.
00:06:05.020 And so the first time I got on stage, I just, I was standing backstage doing George, and I walked, I tried to time it.
00:06:12.260 So when I walked out, oh, well, here's what happened to me when I was in school.
00:06:15.080 And that sort of worked.
00:06:17.300 It worked pretty good.
00:06:18.340 So there's a whole generation.
00:06:19.680 Richard Pryor.
00:06:21.460 You know, nobody's better than, we called him Richie back then.
00:06:24.460 But I used to try and go on.
00:06:27.780 I remember back in the 70s, I think Richard Pryor was the first guy to do a comedy stand-up movie.
00:06:36.260 It was Richard Pryor live at the Sunset Strip.
00:06:38.520 And for about two months, he would come to the comedy store to break in the material.
00:06:44.040 And killer, nobody's funnier than Richard.
00:06:46.660 It was unbelievable.
00:06:47.820 And I remember saying to Mitzi, who owned the bus, can I go on after Richard every night?
00:06:52.440 You know?
00:06:52.940 And nobody wanted to do it because you just died.
00:06:56.260 But I realized I did not have an hour's worth of material.
00:06:59.680 I had about 12 minutes.
00:07:01.660 Because after following Richie and you go on.
00:07:03.780 But it was good training because they just threw out everything that wasn't funny.
00:07:06.900 You know, comics are inherently pretty lazy.
00:07:09.720 Well, you know, that joke worked back in the 80s.
00:07:12.180 Yeah, but it's not the 80s anymore.
00:07:13.900 You can't, you people, how old are you?
00:07:16.520 What are you talking about, you know?
00:07:18.360 I remember seeing a comedian not that long ago.
00:07:22.180 You know, I was thinking about Nixon in the paper the other day.
00:07:24.340 And I go, first of all, Nixon was not in the paper the other day.
00:07:27.260 I don't believe you as an audience member.
00:07:29.660 And you're doing, I'm not a crook, you know, all that.
00:07:32.240 Nobody knows what you're talking about.
00:07:33.640 Nobody knows who Richard Nixon is.
00:07:35.440 I mean, but that's what happens in your comic.
00:07:37.920 You just sort of, you just keep doing it thinking, well, it didn't work once, you know.
00:07:42.580 It's like guys that have a bad pickup line.
00:07:44.480 They got laid once with it in the 90s.
00:07:47.220 And they've been saying the line ever since, you know.
00:07:51.980 It's interesting that you say that.
00:07:53.880 You do, it's so interesting because comedians are like that.
00:07:57.440 Oh, no, mate, that joke worked three months ago.
00:07:59.900 You go, yeah, it worked once.
00:08:01.400 Right, right.
00:08:01.900 It doesn't mean it's going to work again.
00:08:03.920 And you're talking about Richard Pryor.
00:08:07.140 For people of our generation, he's a legendary figure.
00:08:10.860 What was it, what was he like as a person?
00:08:12.640 What was it like working with him and watching him perform?
00:08:15.580 Well, he was a great comic.
00:08:20.240 Moody.
00:08:20.720 He, some days, it was Richard, sometime, Mr. Pryor.
00:08:26.880 And you realize, oh, okay, he's serious now.
00:08:29.720 Okay.
00:08:30.060 Hey, Ms. Pryor.
00:08:32.060 Yeah.
00:08:32.920 And then 10 minutes later, you're fine.
00:08:35.100 You know, just odd.
00:08:37.180 Did a lot of drugs.
00:08:38.860 A lot of drugs.
00:08:40.060 You know.
00:08:41.640 And, you know, he grew up in a whorehouse in Peoria, Illinois.
00:08:46.220 I think his aunt or somebody ran the brothel.
00:08:48.920 So, you know, just witness to a lot of things at an extremely young age that were either inappropriate or just outright wrong.
00:08:56.740 So, you cut him some slack.
00:09:00.640 But really funny.
00:09:02.700 I mean, to the point where it was so natural.
00:09:08.980 And, you know, he was the first guy to use terms, like, these motherfuckers, you know, all the time.
00:09:13.560 And I remember Cosby would yell at him, you know, Cosby, the moral equivalent.
00:09:19.080 Stop using the F word.
00:09:20.380 Stop using that.
00:09:21.180 But for Richard, you never felt like he was using it gratuitously.
00:09:24.480 Yeah.
00:09:24.720 It was a vernacular.
00:09:27.180 He was talking as a character.
00:09:29.080 And it was always just really funny to watch, you know.
00:09:34.900 Oh, he had just, I remember some of the, you know, about two black guys at the urinal, you know, and the standard at the urinal guy.
00:09:41.880 One guy says, his water's cold.
00:09:43.560 Yeah.
00:09:43.780 And deep, too.
00:09:45.000 Just those kind of jokes, you know.
00:09:47.600 Just that.
00:09:49.140 Yeah.
00:09:49.600 I mean, he was really good.
00:09:52.500 Yeah.
00:09:52.900 It was really a joy to watch him work because it wasn't set up punchline.
00:09:58.620 It wasn't a guy goes into a bar.
00:09:59.940 It wasn't that.
00:10:01.080 He was always telling a story and playing a character.
00:10:05.260 And that's what really made it work.
00:10:07.620 Yeah.
00:10:08.180 What were those days like in the comedy store in the 70s and the 80s?
00:10:12.500 Wonderful.
00:10:13.100 Wonderful.
00:10:13.660 Because to me, you know, it's so funny.
00:10:15.500 Whenever there was a series about it, I'm dying up here.
00:10:19.880 And, you know, the drugs and the depression.
00:10:23.660 To me, it was a joyous time because I never met another comedian.
00:10:29.000 When I was, I was fortunate.
00:10:31.220 When I started in New England and Boston, didn't have comedy clubs.
00:10:35.220 I worked strip clubs.
00:10:36.220 So, I never knew how bad I was because people are always yelling or throwing stuff at you, you know.
00:10:42.260 So, if I got a laugh at all, I thought that was great.
00:10:45.580 It wasn't until I, there was a club called Lenny's on the Turnpike, which is a great name.
00:10:49.880 But it was a jazz club.
00:10:51.660 And I got to open for Miles Davis.
00:10:54.000 Wow.
00:10:54.260 And Getz and Moe's Allison and Amon Jamal and Rahsaan Roland-Kirk.
00:10:58.880 And I would get, please don't come here at Jay Leno.
00:11:01.340 I'd walk on stage.
00:11:04.400 And they were there to listen because they're jazz people.
00:11:07.400 Yeah.
00:11:07.860 I never had an audience that listened before.
00:11:10.240 It was always, you suck, get up, Steph.
00:11:12.380 I remember the first time I got on stage.
00:11:14.760 The first time, Jay Leno.
00:11:16.220 And the guy goes, we hate him.
00:11:17.920 You suck.
00:11:18.560 And I'm thinking, did they see me come in?
00:11:20.440 How can they hate me?
00:11:21.200 You know, well, of course they didn't see me.
00:11:23.320 It wasn't based on anything.
00:11:24.960 It was just a rough joint.
00:11:27.180 That's what it was.
00:11:27.900 So, working that jazz club, it really made me appreciate the audiences and the economy
00:11:33.260 of words, trying to get to a joke as quickly as possible without a lot of, you know, I
00:11:38.900 think the reason comedians like to talk to other comedians is when you talk to regular
00:11:43.000 people, they go, right?
00:11:44.120 So, I goes to him, right?
00:11:45.440 So, like, she goes back to me.
00:11:47.200 What do you mean goes back to me?
00:11:47.800 You mean she, they just trip over the, yeah.
00:11:51.260 They're tripping on themselves, you know.
00:11:53.060 Comedians get to the point, so it makes it a fun conversation.
00:11:56.280 And Jay, you talk about starting out working strip clubs.
00:12:01.080 People who haven't done stand-up don't know.
00:12:03.300 I mean, I've never played a strip club in my life, thankfully.
00:12:05.880 But even, you know, I've been similar situations.
00:12:09.000 That's a horrible experience as a comedian.
00:12:11.260 No, it's a great experience.
00:12:11.920 You enjoyed it?
00:12:12.540 Well, I enjoyed it because there's nothing worse than silence.
00:12:17.980 And if they're not paying attention, it's not your fault.
00:12:21.140 Yeah.
00:12:21.700 You know, you're up there, okay, maybe you throw out an ad lib and get a laugh and, hey,
00:12:26.200 shut the fuck up.
00:12:26.840 Oh, okay, that wasn't really funny, but okay, I got a laugh.
00:12:29.600 You know, so it was sort of comforting because it wasn't my fault.
00:12:34.380 Well, I used to go into bars and I'd put a $50 bill on the bar and I would say, the bar
00:12:38.460 can I get to do comedy?
00:12:39.260 No.
00:12:39.860 I'd go, okay, it's $50.
00:12:41.660 If I do bad and people leave, keep the $50.
00:12:44.040 If I do good and they laugh, give me the $50 back.
00:12:46.680 Okay.
00:12:47.820 That costs you about $500.
00:12:50.540 But it also, a couple of times, they'd say, yeah, come back on Wednesday.
00:12:56.420 We've got a, what they used to call them, a hoot nanny night.
00:12:59.560 It was folks saying, yeah, come back.
00:13:01.020 You can have them say, oh, okay.
00:13:02.580 And that sort of led into it.
00:13:04.560 So I was a bit fortunate, you know, when you come to Los Angeles, I would meet new comedians
00:13:10.140 and they'd walk into the comedy store, the improv, and Robin Williams on stage, and Jerry
00:13:14.820 Seinfeld, and David Letterman, and they'd go, oh, man.
00:13:18.440 And they would just be so intimidated, they couldn't even go on.
00:13:21.640 The places I worked, the audiences were terrible, the acts were terrible.
00:13:27.680 So I really didn't feel I was that bad.
00:13:30.000 It wasn't until I came here and went, whoa, I got to get my act together.
00:13:33.080 But these guys are really good, you know.
00:13:34.920 So it was actually rather comforting.
00:13:37.400 That's such an interesting point.
00:13:38.560 I guess where I was going with it, it does take, you know, a lot of determination to come
00:13:42.680 into a place and, you know, I'll give you $50 to be able to perform.
00:13:46.620 What was it that drove you to do that?
00:13:49.040 Why did you have that tenacity to keep going when, you know, you're not crushing it, you're
00:13:54.020 not in front of lots of people, you're not making money, et cetera?
00:13:56.620 I'm a huge believer in low self-esteem.
00:13:59.640 I think it's the key to success.
00:14:01.280 If you don't think you're the smartest person in the room, you listen, you know.
00:14:05.500 And I realized there's nothing else I really enjoyed doing.
00:14:10.320 I'm dyslexic, so I was a terrible, terrible student.
00:14:13.980 And I enjoy talking to people and telling stories.
00:14:18.960 And to your friend, you know, you're the class clown at school, all that kind of stuff.
00:14:22.080 And you would get laughs.
00:14:23.880 It seemed like I figured I would do it until I just had to get a real job.
00:14:27.780 Because no matter how bad it was, it was not as bad as not doing it.
00:14:34.120 You know what I mean?
00:14:34.700 Yeah.
00:14:35.040 Because you're on stage, the lights are on you.
00:14:37.560 Oh, I worked to awful places.
00:14:39.540 I worked one place where the guy said, the beachcomber in Avere, Massachusetts, he said,
00:14:44.640 when you come, just wear your own clothes.
00:14:46.620 I go, I want to dress up.
00:14:47.600 Just wear your own clothes.
00:14:48.900 Why?
00:14:50.360 Okay.
00:14:50.940 Well, because the guys, they would smoke the cigarettes down, and then they'd flick them on you, you know.
00:14:55.740 So I'm on stage once, and I hear the audience laughing.
00:14:59.920 And my jacket's on fire, because the guy flicked the cigarette.
00:15:04.700 I had a wool suit on, and it started smoking, you know.
00:15:08.020 Yeah.
00:15:09.100 Wow.
00:15:09.740 Yeah.
00:15:10.060 I might tell you a funny story.
00:15:11.340 I was at a place in Boston.
00:15:15.260 Like, just a tough place.
00:15:16.660 And I'm on stage, and some guy's being seated, you know.
00:15:21.160 And they seat him right next to a pole.
00:15:23.800 Because they can't see.
00:15:24.660 Just shut up and watch the show.
00:15:26.740 Everything's okay?
00:15:27.440 Everything's okay, Miss Lennon.
00:15:28.340 Don't worry about it.
00:15:30.080 And then I hear, ah!
00:15:32.980 What was that?
00:15:33.780 And then people laugh.
00:15:34.680 They drag this guy out.
00:15:36.100 And I come off stage, and I said, what was that?
00:15:38.620 And they said, oh, the guy was hassling them by the seat.
00:15:41.900 Well, why'd he scream?
00:15:43.120 Billy, Billy the bouncer, stabbed him in the leg with a knife and just cut him up, you know.
00:15:49.840 And the guy's bleeding.
00:15:51.120 So they gave him 20 bucks, put him in the cab, sent him off.
00:15:53.960 Okay.
00:15:55.380 Okay, so fine.
00:15:56.380 So those were the days, man.
00:15:58.520 Yeah.
00:15:58.760 Yeah.
00:15:58.940 So then, like, a month later, I get a call from the club.
00:16:02.000 They go, hey, Jay, remember Billy the bouncer, the guy that helped you?
00:16:06.240 What do you mean he helped?
00:16:06.860 Remember that I was a heckler and Billy stabbed him?
00:16:09.800 I go, well, that didn't really help me.
00:16:11.580 I go, well, what's the problem?
00:16:12.500 He goes, and this is my favorite.
00:16:15.240 He said, well, he killed the guy.
00:16:16.380 Now the cops are hassling him.
00:16:19.200 And I actually said to the club, I said, well, you think the cops will go after real criminals?
00:16:23.620 And the club goes, yeah, exactly, exactly.
00:16:26.880 And it just made me, I mean, that's what you were dealing with.
00:16:31.580 And it was just very odd, very funny, just curious, working with strippers.
00:16:38.100 I loved it because I was a kid.
00:16:39.820 I was 19.
00:16:41.220 And most of these strippers, it's not like now.
00:16:44.520 Most of these strippers were women that didn't type, weren't in the secretarial pool.
00:16:51.160 And there weren't a lot of, a lot of them were in their 40s.
00:16:53.860 And I used to work with these two women, Lily Pagan and Anita Man, that was her name.
00:17:01.100 And we would drive out to army bases and they would set up like a giant champagne glass,
00:17:07.440 you know, nails in their mouths, put it together, fill it with water and take a bath in it while
00:17:11.860 I told jokes, okay.
00:17:13.820 But they, I was like a son to them, right?
00:17:16.500 And they'd have the big, they had their head shaved, but they'd wear wigs, you know.
00:17:20.560 But I mean, big, strong women, you know.
00:17:24.540 So I'm on stage running.
00:17:25.700 She's in the bathtub doing this, right?
00:17:27.780 And the guy's heckling.
00:17:29.480 I mean, really, just yelling.
00:17:31.300 She just gets out of the tub, goes, oh, boom, breaks the guy's nose.
00:17:35.680 Blood all over the place.
00:17:37.280 She's got blood.
00:17:37.720 She gets back in the tub.
00:17:39.180 She's washing the blood.
00:17:40.240 The crowd is cheering.
00:17:42.140 And I'm just, I mean, that, I mean, that's what it was.
00:17:45.240 It was a great life.
00:17:46.380 It was very, you know, my friends are working at Wendy's and McDonald's covered in peanut
00:17:50.300 oil.
00:17:50.680 I'm working with strippers at 19.
00:17:53.620 I mean, I loved it.
00:17:55.120 It was a lot of fun.
00:17:55.980 And again, you don't realize how bad you are.
00:17:58.520 You don't realize if you're a good comedian or a bad comedian.
00:18:01.040 First of all, you have to learn how to talk in front of a crowd and get a stage presence.
00:18:06.140 To have that and the jokes at the same time is pretty rare.
00:18:10.100 So the fact that I was able to get stage time, I always tell young comedians, you know,
00:18:14.420 your church, your synagogue, your pub, if there's like a karaoke night, see if you can
00:18:21.440 MC it.
00:18:22.140 That way you don't have to be a professional comedian.
00:18:24.240 You're just on stage.
00:18:25.020 You say something funny.
00:18:26.000 Oh, good.
00:18:26.560 Say something else.
00:18:27.200 Oh, that's funny.
00:18:27.800 Okay.
00:18:28.380 As soon as you don't get a laugh.
00:18:29.520 Okay.
00:18:29.960 Let's bring on the next day.
00:18:30.920 You know what I mean?
00:18:31.360 Just to get that stage time.
00:18:33.100 And that's what was great.
00:18:34.420 So I love that era.
00:18:35.720 I mean, just, you know, once you punch that guy in the face, and he was a big one, just
00:18:41.320 boom, just get this guy.
00:18:43.220 And his friends are all laughing.
00:18:44.640 His nose is smashed.
00:18:46.320 There's blood all over the place.
00:18:47.840 I'm hilarious.
00:18:48.540 Yeah.
00:18:48.820 That's a hell of a microaggression right there.
00:18:50.760 Yeah, exactly.
00:18:52.640 But Jay, you also had a few brushes with the mob, didn't you, when you were doing those gigs?
00:18:58.000 Yeah.
00:18:58.320 I mean, you know, the real trick is you don't fall for the trap.
00:19:05.900 You know, I remember where I was at a place called Catch a Rising Star, which is in New
00:19:10.220 York.
00:19:11.060 And you got the real New York crowd, right?
00:19:15.200 And I come off stage.
00:19:17.240 I'm in the bar.
00:19:18.500 And this guy, it looks like somebody from the golf club.
00:19:21.540 Hey, kid, come here.
00:19:22.660 He goes, you're a funny kid.
00:19:24.280 He puts $100 in my breast pocket.
00:19:26.620 This was 40, 50 years ago with $100, $1,000.
00:19:31.460 And I said, no, no, give it to the church or something.
00:19:34.240 And he goes, no, no, no, no, no.
00:19:36.380 And I didn't take it.
00:19:37.320 And he goes, you know, you're smart.
00:19:38.900 You don't take money from people like me.
00:19:40.520 You're a smart kid.
00:19:41.300 And he goes, never bothered me again.
00:19:43.500 And you realize that's kind of how these things work, you know?
00:19:46.140 I know some people in showbinds, they want to hang out with thugs.
00:19:49.660 They want to think they're living the gangster life.
00:19:52.240 Hey, will you pick up this thing at the airport for me?
00:19:54.220 Just go pick it up.
00:19:55.500 You know, and then, of course, they get arrested or whatever.
00:19:57.520 I mean, you fall into the trap.
00:19:59.740 But I already realized by not taking that $100, nobody ever bothered me again.
00:20:04.560 Yeah.
00:20:05.360 So it's all right.
00:20:06.420 Yeah.
00:20:06.740 It's interesting that you say that because you look at people like Sinatra and then later
00:20:11.160 on rappers, they made that mistake.
00:20:13.720 Yeah.
00:20:13.900 Oh, some get through it, some don't.
00:20:17.180 But yeah, yeah.
00:20:18.000 It doesn't seem like a smart way to go, no.
00:20:20.340 No, absolutely not.
00:20:21.780 So how did you segue into TV?
00:20:24.080 Was it via the comedy store in L.A.?
00:20:26.600 Well, TV was always looking for comedians, especially in the 70s and 80s.
00:20:33.560 Stand-up comedy, not so much now on TV.
00:20:35.780 But back then, it was a staple of any talk show.
00:20:40.380 And there were afternoon talk shows or evening talk shows.
00:20:43.400 And to have a comedian who could do five to seven minutes, oh, that was the best.
00:20:47.340 So they would come see you, and you would audition, you know.
00:20:52.180 That's another part of the business I liked a lot because you always got more work from
00:20:56.280 other comedians than you ever got from an agent or a manager.
00:20:59.780 You know, the idea is, oh, it's this cutthroat business.
00:21:02.800 And I always see that portrayed that way.
00:21:05.940 I mean, Steve Martin brought Johnny Carson in to see me.
00:21:08.280 Harvey Korman brought Johnny in to see me a couple of times.
00:21:11.580 I brought Johnny in to see Ellen DeGeneres once I got a little bit of fame.
00:21:17.820 I mean, you can't do every job every day, every place.
00:21:21.220 So there's really enough work for everybody.
00:21:23.760 You know, every pub in the country has a karaoke night or a comedy night or something.
00:21:28.080 So there's plenty of gigs to do.
00:21:30.260 And comedians always helped one another.
00:21:32.200 I lived in Boston, which was odd because most comedians were in New York.
00:21:35.800 So my place was where comedians would stay when they came to Boston.
00:21:40.040 And I just decided, hey, to go to Boston, call this guy, Jay Leno, let you stay at his place.
00:21:43.480 Okay.
00:21:44.080 And that's how I got to know Billy Crystal and Freddie Prinze and all kinds of comedians.
00:21:48.620 Because Freddie Prinze, I mean, that was a, I mean, when you saw the documentary about the comedy store,
00:21:54.720 I wasn't aware of him.
00:21:55.640 I was only aware of his son because he's the same generation.
00:21:57.900 Right, right.
00:21:58.480 But you forget what an incredible comedian he was.
00:22:01.800 He was very good.
00:22:02.560 He was a young kid.
00:22:03.520 He was 17, 18 when he started.
00:22:06.540 But it was a classic couldn't-handle-the-fame thing, you know.
00:22:11.720 I mean, rather sad.
00:22:13.620 And he didn't kill himself.
00:22:16.080 Ultimately, it was deemed an accident.
00:22:17.920 But he had a, you know, Freddie would, like, put a bullet in the gun and say to the girl,
00:22:22.000 I'm going to go kill myself, bang, fire it in the sand, and then pretend to be dead.
00:22:24.960 And then she'd scream.
00:22:25.920 And, you know, just weird, just weird, you know.
00:22:30.680 And one time, there was a bullet in the gun.
00:22:33.580 And that's when he killed himself.
00:22:34.680 That's when he died.
00:22:36.140 I mean, that's what I think happened.
00:22:38.680 And ultimately, that's what the insurance company, I believe, ruled it.
00:22:41.920 And, Jay, you mentioned being able to handle fame.
00:22:44.220 There are clearly some people who can and some people who can't.
00:22:46.820 Do you have any thoughts on why it is that some people are able to take it in their stride
00:22:51.340 and others really struggle?
00:22:52.240 Well, you know, that's the great thing about doing The Tonight Show.
00:22:54.360 Because I could be around show business without living it, you know.
00:23:00.560 You know, I love Charlie Sheen.
00:23:02.700 Charlie Sheen's a friend of mine.
00:23:04.400 I don't want to be Charlie Sheen.
00:23:06.220 So being part of Charlie Sheen.
00:23:07.740 You know, one day, we had Charlie Sheen booked on the show, man.
00:23:11.260 So the show was taping at 5 o'clock.
00:23:12.840 And I go, boy, it's 4 o'clock.
00:23:15.080 Charlie, are you here yet?
00:23:15.740 No.
00:23:16.740 Then the phone on my desk for me, Jay, I got a phone call.
00:23:19.240 Charlie Sheen, what?
00:23:20.460 Jay, man.
00:23:21.480 In the limo, we got T-Bone.
00:23:24.380 Are you all right?
00:23:24.840 I'm okay.
00:23:25.660 Okay, yeah.
00:23:26.240 But, oh, man, they caught fire, the whole thing.
00:23:28.720 You all right?
00:23:29.300 Yeah, yeah.
00:23:29.740 All right, look, Charlie, don't worry about it.
00:23:31.200 Well, I'll get a comment, get somebody to film.
00:23:32.700 Say, Charlie had an accident.
00:23:34.200 You know, call a comedian.
00:23:35.660 Let's get somebody.
00:23:36.360 Okay.
00:23:37.940 I got the news, huh?
00:23:38.980 I don't hear anything about it, you know.
00:23:41.040 So I go, let me call the driver, you know.
00:23:43.780 Now it's like quarter to five.
00:23:45.580 Hello?
00:23:46.380 Joe?
00:23:46.780 Yeah, it's Jay.
00:23:47.640 Yeah.
00:23:48.800 Who are you?
00:23:49.380 He said, I'm sitting outside Charlie Sheen's house.
00:23:51.160 He hasn't come out yet.
00:23:52.200 You didn't get T-boned in a limo?
00:23:54.380 What?
00:23:54.760 No.
00:23:56.000 And I called Charlie.
00:23:57.080 I go, Charlie, what are you, two?
00:23:59.240 There's a monster under there.
00:24:01.360 You don't think I'm going to check that you're in a limo
00:24:03.200 or got T-boned and it caught fire?
00:24:05.580 And that's why.
00:24:06.660 I mean, it was so stupid.
00:24:09.800 You know, not like, oh, I'm sick.
00:24:11.520 Oh, okay.
00:24:12.840 But the idea of the limo and you got T-boned,
00:24:14.760 it burst into flames and the police fired.
00:24:17.240 Yeah, just hilarious.
00:24:18.240 I mean, so that's what was fun about doing the show.
00:24:21.320 I could live that life and enjoy it without having it affect me.
00:24:25.980 Yeah.
00:24:26.580 And, you know, I was thinking about this when we were coming here
00:24:29.680 to interview.
00:24:30.140 You've been married since 1980.
00:24:32.020 Right.
00:24:32.440 You're not, you know, you don't drink or take drugs.
00:24:35.560 Is that right?
00:24:35.860 No, no.
00:24:36.320 I'm sorry about that.
00:24:38.300 You know, I just have no interest in it.
00:24:40.280 Yeah.
00:24:40.440 It doesn't interest me.
00:24:41.840 It's not like I'm on some moral high horse.
00:24:44.400 Sure.
00:24:44.520 No, no, no.
00:24:45.120 It's just not.
00:24:45.720 I was always, I'm a car guy.
00:24:47.400 So I was always a designated driver.
00:24:49.620 So losing my license would be the biggest fear of my life.
00:24:52.800 You know, so consequently, I was the guy that drive all my drunk friends around.
00:24:55.880 That's fine.
00:24:56.360 And then roll them later and take their money.
00:24:58.300 Yeah.
00:24:59.040 But, no.
00:25:00.240 But, yeah.
00:25:01.780 This is your addiction, basically.
00:25:03.400 Yeah.
00:25:03.520 Yeah.
00:25:03.560 This is it here.
00:25:04.340 Yeah.
00:25:04.700 And how did you get into cars?
00:25:06.120 What was it?
00:25:07.020 Well, you grew up in New England.
00:25:08.440 And there were always broken snowmobiles.
00:25:10.260 You know, in America, you could buy cars for $25 or $50.
00:25:15.200 Cars that were really not that old, five or ten years old.
00:25:17.900 Yeah.
00:25:18.000 Because there were just so many cars in America that there were stuff.
00:25:22.360 Cars would be abandoned in the field.
00:25:23.920 It wouldn't take a lot to get them running.
00:25:25.660 And that's what we did.
00:25:26.700 You know, in those days, I remember we found a Renault 4CV, which is a small, you know.
00:25:32.860 And we had three acres in our, we didn't live on a farm, but lived in a rural area.
00:25:36.980 But, so, we would drive around about.
00:25:38.860 I mean, now, of course, they call child services and the parents would go to prison and you
00:25:43.460 can put it in a foster home.
00:25:44.500 But my mom would just watch out.
00:25:46.020 We were like 11.
00:25:47.120 My mom would watch through the kitchen window while she's doing ditches.
00:25:50.220 And we would just drive the Renault around, you know.
00:25:52.640 And we rolled it over a couple of times, stuff like that.
00:25:55.400 And so, that's where it sort of comes.
00:25:57.400 Plus, when you work with your hands, you tend to get more of an appreciation how easy it
00:26:01.720 is to talk for a living.
00:26:03.480 You know, the idea that the heart is healthy when the head and the hands work together,
00:26:07.540 that kind of thing.
00:26:08.260 You know, so you work and you go out and you stand on stage.
00:26:10.820 Oh, God, this is so much easier than taking a transmission out.
00:26:14.300 Yeah, that's such a profound point.
00:26:17.220 I think that's part of the problem of our society, Jay, is that very few of us work with
00:26:21.500 our hands.
00:26:22.080 We're all in our head.
00:26:23.360 Right.
00:26:23.680 And that's why we've come up with these crazy ideas or we get offended by things that
00:26:28.540 we shouldn't get offended about.
00:26:30.000 Yeah, so is me.
00:26:30.720 Because we're not connected to the reality anymore.
00:26:33.680 I suppose that's true.
00:26:35.360 Yeah.
00:26:35.680 Yeah, I think there's a certain amount of truth to that.
00:26:39.100 But again, like I said, it's low self-esteem.
00:26:41.160 You don't think you're the smartest.
00:26:42.420 I'm so fortunate to make the kind of money to afford all this stuff.
00:26:46.960 You know, please.
00:26:48.460 You know, I don't think, oh, I'm really good.
00:26:51.540 No.
00:26:52.380 Because what are you doing on the truth?
00:26:54.080 That's my favorite thing when I talk to young comedians.
00:26:56.140 You know, I never ask people, I always take the job and ask what it pays later.
00:27:02.440 Yeah.
00:27:02.780 You know, like when I was doing The Tonight Show.
00:27:05.120 Now, at the time, I was a guest host.
00:27:08.800 And there were maybe a half a dozen or more comedians that were also guest hosts.
00:27:15.360 And I was the seventh guy out of the six.
00:27:20.800 And those six are all represented by the same manager.
00:27:23.740 And that manager called me and said, listen, we're going to Johnny Carson.
00:27:27.440 And we're going to ask $25,000 a show to host.
00:27:31.980 And I said, oh, OK.
00:27:33.340 You know, I'm getting $512 a show to host, which was scale.
00:27:37.220 Yeah.
00:27:38.020 He said, no, we're getting it.
00:27:39.160 I said, you're getting it?
00:27:39.700 Yeah, we got it last week.
00:27:40.960 If so-and-so, we got it with so-and-so, whenever they host.
00:27:43.160 I said, you know, I'm going to stick with the $512.
00:27:47.480 All right, make a mistake.
00:27:48.900 All right.
00:27:49.420 Well, guess who gets named permanent guest host?
00:27:53.060 I mean, Johnny owns the show.
00:27:54.840 OK.
00:27:55.620 Now, these guys, it's costing us $250,000 a month.
00:27:59.480 Lolo costs us $2,500 a month.
00:28:01.700 They all doing about the same?
00:28:02.840 Yeah.
00:28:03.780 Why don't we go with Lolo?
00:28:04.980 OK.
00:28:05.920 And then the money comes later.
00:28:07.560 You know, I always meet comedians that just, I'm not working for that kind of money.
00:28:11.400 What are you doing on a Tuesday?
00:28:13.160 It's worth $5,000.
00:28:14.600 Really?
00:28:15.120 Really?
00:28:15.860 And that's all that's been my attitude about it, you know?
00:28:18.820 If you're any good, the money will come later.
00:28:21.700 Plus, there's a joy in doing it.
00:28:24.000 I mean, the same show I do for a charity, Benefit and Free, is just as joyous to do as one that's
00:28:31.940 paying you a lot of money in Vegas.
00:28:33.720 And sometimes it's more fun, you know?
00:28:35.380 So, if that makes any sense.
00:28:36.960 That makes perfect.
00:28:37.760 You really love the job.
00:28:39.660 Yeah, I think it's great fun.
00:28:40.840 I really like it.
00:28:41.920 I like the challenge of it.
00:28:43.240 I like, but you know, you have to like people.
00:28:45.860 I'm amazed at the number of comedians I meet that just don't like people.
00:28:49.600 I don't want to deal with those jerks, you know?
00:28:51.580 No, I've not seen anybody after the show.
00:28:53.260 No pictures.
00:28:54.540 Well, somebody goes out of their way to pay, you know, a lot of money to come see you.
00:29:00.960 Why would you not want to please thank them and say hello?
00:29:03.900 It's why I don't sell swag.
00:29:05.500 I mean, oh, you should sell t-shirts and photos afterwards.
00:29:08.780 You know, they've got another way to buy a ticket.
00:29:11.020 I'm not going to hit.
00:29:11.540 Oh, it's another 10 bucks to shake my hand.
00:29:14.040 Thank you.
00:29:14.780 You know, it just seems a little, uh, yeah.
00:29:17.480 Did you ever think you'd be here?
00:29:18.960 No.
00:29:20.120 No.
00:29:20.700 I never thought I would be here.
00:29:22.120 No.
00:29:22.860 It's the most ridiculous thing in the world to me.
00:29:25.680 I mean, I suppose on some level I probably thought, wouldn't that be nice?
00:29:29.760 But not, not in any real world.
00:29:32.960 I mean, yeah, no, no, it never did.
00:29:35.860 So that's why I am eternally grateful, you know, because like I say, you know, when I,
00:29:41.780 when I got the Tonight Show, I hired the best writers I could find and the best lighting people.
00:29:47.080 And I listened to them.
00:29:48.320 When they told me I sucked, okay, I guess I sucked.
00:29:51.960 So what do we do to change?
00:29:53.160 You know, I had the same crew for 22 years.
00:29:55.680 I know so many comics that go through writers and they don't let the writer find your voice,
00:30:00.240 take a chance.
00:30:00.980 You know, I never hired anybody for 13 weeks.
00:30:03.380 I would hire them for a year because it would take nine months sometimes for them to go,
00:30:08.260 oh, I think like, I would say, just write down everything.
00:30:11.860 Even if it's not a punchline, even if it's just a setup, a store that sells this.
00:30:17.060 Okay.
00:30:17.900 Maybe someone of us can come on.
00:30:19.360 And that really worked out pretty good for me.
00:30:22.040 So based on what you're saying, you sound like a really nice guy, Jay.
00:30:26.320 Hey, fuck you.
00:30:29.460 That will be the moment from this interview that everyone's going to love.
00:30:32.820 Someone telling me to go fuck myself.
00:30:34.480 Go for it.
00:30:35.020 But it's a very powerful message because what you're talking about is humility.
00:30:38.480 And you see, you know, in any field or any particular career, the moment people lose touch
00:30:46.820 and they stop being humble.
00:30:48.660 Right.
00:30:49.000 That's the moment.
00:30:49.960 Oh, yeah.
00:30:51.000 You can trace it.
00:30:52.840 I am so amazed at the just typical thing and then the drugs.
00:31:00.700 You know, I always say behind every successful man, there's a woman.
00:31:05.280 Behind every unsuccessful man, there are two women.
00:31:08.760 And that's usually what happens.
00:31:10.460 It just makes me laugh.
00:31:12.780 You know, whether it's Justin Bieber or something.
00:31:14.960 Okay.
00:31:15.120 Then they go through the obligatory drug stage.
00:31:17.780 And then, you know, it's hilarious.
00:31:19.720 It just makes me laugh.
00:31:20.760 Because how did you steer a path through that, though?
00:31:25.880 How did you steer through?
00:31:26.860 Because you're very self-deprecating.
00:31:28.980 You're very affable.
00:31:30.240 You're a nice guy.
00:31:31.300 But when everybody's telling you, hey, this is Jay Leno.
00:31:33.900 You're a big shot.
00:31:35.000 How do you stop yourself?
00:31:35.880 Well, first of all, you don't have those people.
00:31:38.400 When I travel, like I'm in Florida this weekend, I travel by myself.
00:31:43.000 Because when you travel by yourself, funny things happen.
00:31:46.000 But funny things don't happen when you have somebody, advanced team, go ahead and clear
00:31:51.700 everything out of the way.
00:31:53.580 You know?
00:31:54.200 I mean, and you have to find the humor in that.
00:31:58.460 You know?
00:31:59.020 The idea is that you have, you know, I have a place in Rhode Island.
00:32:04.560 And I was there the other day.
00:32:06.960 And I always go to Joe's Pizza.
00:32:09.980 Just a little place that sells wings.
00:32:12.960 Okay.
00:32:13.580 So someone said, hey, you got to try this Nicholas Pizza.
00:32:16.000 All right.
00:32:17.540 So I go to Nicholas Pizza.
00:32:18.540 Oh, there's a line.
00:32:19.240 That must mean it's good.
00:32:20.680 I go, Jay?
00:32:22.380 I go, hey, it's Joe.
00:32:24.020 What?
00:32:24.480 You know, Joe's Pizza.
00:32:25.540 Hey, Joe, how you doing?
00:32:26.700 He goes, what are you doing here?
00:32:28.740 I go, so I just lie.
00:32:32.040 I go, you know, I had a coupon.
00:32:35.040 I figured I'd try to use a coupon.
00:32:37.620 And he says, coupon?
00:32:40.300 Hey, we all agree we wouldn't use coupons.
00:32:42.560 That son of a bitch using a coupon.
00:32:43.780 And now I go, wait, hang on, hang on.
00:32:46.460 Now I'm in this lie.
00:32:48.120 I'm in this stupid lie.
00:32:50.800 You rather just say, oh, I want to try another pizza.
00:32:54.220 You know, I'm trying to dig myself out of it.
00:32:56.640 And finally I said, look, no, actually, I just want to eat.
00:32:59.320 But that's what I mean.
00:33:00.080 Those things don't happen when you have somebody get your pizza for you.
00:33:04.980 You know what I mean?
00:33:05.580 I mean, that's sort of, that's really the fun part of it.
00:33:09.520 It's just, you meet the oddest people, you know?
00:33:13.120 Like I get, like when I go back to New England, which is a very quirky,
00:33:17.380 I don't know what the equivalent would be in England.
00:33:21.860 But I get what they call Boston compliments.
00:33:27.040 This is a real compliment I got.
00:33:29.920 I'm walking down Newberry Street and this guy goes, hey, Jay Leno,
00:33:32.740 my friend met you in California.
00:33:34.740 He said, you're not an asshole.
00:33:37.020 And I said, oh, well, thank you very much.
00:33:38.700 And then he goes, no, really?
00:33:39.900 He said you weren't.
00:33:41.140 I said, well, please tell him thank you very much.
00:33:43.360 And I realized that's as good as you're going to get.
00:33:45.680 You know, to his world, that was a compliment.
00:33:49.640 And it just made me laugh.
00:33:50.960 I wasn't offended by it.
00:33:52.440 But it's just funny.
00:33:54.120 Nobody would say that to me if I had to finally some bodyguards
00:33:57.240 or people walking with me.
00:33:58.980 If I hadn't been walking by myself, that wouldn't have happened.
00:34:02.220 And I thought, well, that was, that just made me laugh.
00:34:05.320 It just was so typical of New England, that quirky, Yankee kind of thing,
00:34:10.280 you know?
00:34:10.520 Yeah.
00:34:10.740 I mean, Massachusetts, back in the 80s,
00:34:14.180 they wanted to pass a mandatory seatbelt law.
00:34:16.580 Well, it's against freedom.
00:34:18.280 And they were selling T-shirts that had a fake seatbelt on it.
00:34:23.360 So when you're driving and a cop saw you,
00:34:25.300 it looked like you were wearing a seatbelt.
00:34:27.140 To go to all this trouble, I mean,
00:34:30.460 that's the mentality that you're dealing with.
00:34:32.260 To show that you're for freedom, freedom to have your head
00:34:35.500 go through the windshield.
00:34:36.560 It always made me laugh.
00:34:37.700 So, yeah, that's why I don't have people travel with me
00:34:45.620 because the funny things don't happen any.
00:34:48.460 By the way, that backhanded compliment,
00:34:50.860 in England, that's a compliment.
00:34:52.760 That's how we do it.
00:34:53.800 Right, right.
00:34:54.180 You can't just praise somebody.
00:34:55.480 You can't just say you're great.
00:34:56.540 That's unacceptable.
00:34:57.320 I love the English thing of noble failures
00:35:00.180 are somehow better than successes.
00:35:01.860 Oh, it failed.
00:35:02.700 Sorry, man, that's terrible.
00:35:03.820 Come on.
00:35:04.680 Oh, you prick, you big successful.
00:35:06.960 Yeah, very funny.
00:35:08.860 Yeah, we hate success in the UK.
00:35:11.160 Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:35:12.560 Have you noticed that?
00:35:14.300 I do notice it.
00:35:15.860 Stranger in a Strange Land is my favorite thing.
00:35:18.960 I love watching immigrant comics come to America.
00:35:22.660 Who was the comedian?
00:35:23.860 A Chinese gentleman.
00:35:25.420 He had a whole bit.
00:35:27.500 I just watched him the other night
00:35:28.740 about America's napkins.
00:35:30.080 I need napkins.
00:35:30.880 When they go to fast food face,
00:35:32.080 they take all the napkins.
00:35:33.560 And I just, I said, why didn't I?
00:35:35.280 Why didn't I think of that?
00:35:36.820 Because I'm an American, so it was second nature.
00:35:40.240 But whatever I want, like Russell Peters,
00:35:41.800 same thing, very funny.
00:35:43.380 The American's reaction to whatever it might be,
00:35:46.820 the immigrant experience, it always makes me laugh.
00:35:49.840 Yeah.
00:35:50.820 That is a really important thing for a comedian
00:35:54.120 to have that outside eye and also to like people.
00:35:59.080 And that's what I got when I used to watch your show
00:36:01.120 is it was so obvious that you liked talking with people.
00:36:04.700 Yeah, you know, and the whole political correctness thing
00:36:07.140 was never really a problem for me
00:36:08.780 because I don't, I mean, my attitude,
00:36:13.560 I find when you have a crowd, they think it's a crowd.
00:36:18.720 They will side with the heckler
00:36:20.580 unless you do something really clever.
00:36:23.700 But for the most part, but whenever I would get hecklers,
00:36:27.000 I remember at times I had just an enormous fat guy
00:36:29.240 and I was making fun of his tie
00:36:32.200 and I could see he was waiting for the fat guy joke.
00:36:36.020 I never did one.
00:36:37.200 And then he got ready and he sat down again, you know,
00:36:41.500 because he realized, I didn't go for the throw.
00:36:43.540 I didn't have to kill him.
00:36:45.440 I just had to gently prod him a little bit.
00:36:48.440 And, you know, when people sense you're not being cruel,
00:36:51.340 then now the audience sides with you.
00:36:53.620 You know, working in an audience
00:36:54.660 is like working with an orchestra.
00:36:56.940 You have to learn.
00:36:59.040 You know, I remember when Hillary Clinton
00:37:01.000 was running for president the last time, not this time.
00:37:04.160 She was running against Jesse Jackson
00:37:06.240 and all the other candidates.
00:37:08.280 And I had a joke about each candidate.
00:37:11.360 And the Jesse Jackson joke was not about him being black,
00:37:14.800 but as a candidate.
00:37:15.960 The joke about Hillary Clinton
00:37:17.380 wasn't because she was a woman,
00:37:18.740 but because she was a candidate.
00:37:19.900 But when I got to the Hillary Clinton joke,
00:37:21.760 I'd hear this,
00:37:22.740 this guttural kind of guy laugh.
00:37:27.740 And I think, oh, do they think I'm making fun of her
00:37:30.280 because she's a woman running for president?
00:37:31.720 And I see women would get sort of standoffish,
00:37:35.360 misinterpreting.
00:37:36.200 So I just took the joke out
00:37:37.480 because I didn't like where it went.
00:37:40.360 You know, you just,
00:37:41.480 it's like hearing a bad note in an orchestra.
00:37:44.260 Just get rid of that note.
00:37:46.360 Just take it out, you know?
00:37:47.580 So you want to have to,
00:37:50.300 to me, the best audience is one
00:37:51.800 that's totally integrated.
00:37:53.860 A lot of male, a lot of female,
00:37:56.280 a lot of different minority people.
00:37:59.000 It just keeps everybody honest.
00:38:00.560 I mean, I'm sure you know,
00:38:01.920 as a comic,
00:38:02.880 playing an all-male audience,
00:38:04.740 that's the worst.
00:38:05.880 Because unless you're doing sports jokes,
00:38:09.000 they don't want to hear it, you know?
00:38:10.980 You know, the women keep the men in line, you know?
00:38:13.180 And if you get the women laughing,
00:38:14.540 oh, no, the men like you too
00:38:16.040 because my date like you, you know?
00:38:17.400 So you have to learn to sort of
00:38:19.160 work the room, you know?
00:38:23.140 Sometimes you can, you know,
00:38:25.580 win the battle but lose the war.
00:38:26.920 And who are your favorite guests
00:38:28.780 to talk to on your shows?
00:38:30.700 Well, I always like politicians
00:38:32.540 because, you know,
00:38:33.440 when you're talking to Batman,
00:38:34.660 it's not really Batman.
00:38:35.920 There's a guy playing Batman, you know?
00:38:38.540 One of my favorite, yeah,
00:38:39.860 I remember Hillary Clinton
00:38:41.840 had the nomination locked up.
00:38:44.400 The election was like 25, 30 weeks away.
00:38:48.360 All of a sudden, this guy, Barack Obama,
00:38:50.140 shows up and gives a speech
00:38:52.120 and people are impressed, you know?
00:38:54.100 So I said, let's call him.
00:38:55.480 So I call him up and say,
00:38:56.320 hey, we'd love to have you on the tonight show.
00:38:57.440 Oh, thanks, Jay.
00:38:58.880 He drives himself to the show,
00:39:00.520 you know, he's got a jacket
00:39:01.300 over his shoulder.
00:39:03.180 He walks down to the,
00:39:04.120 Jay, my name is Barack Hussein Obama
00:39:05.360 and I'm running for President of the United States.
00:39:07.240 I say, okay, a black guy from Chicago,
00:39:10.040 his middle name is Hussein,
00:39:11.280 nobody ever heard of him.
00:39:12.140 You don't even need to campaign.
00:39:13.340 I think you're just going to win that.
00:39:14.820 And he thought that was the funniest thing.
00:39:16.880 And we got to be friends, you know?
00:39:19.100 So he gave me his cell phone number.
00:39:21.700 Next time he was on the show,
00:39:22.780 he was President of the United States.
00:39:24.560 And this time the whole parking lot
00:39:26.860 was tented for like two acres.
00:39:29.720 So when the presidential limousine
00:39:31.700 came in from a satellite,
00:39:32.860 you couldn't see where it went under the tent.
00:39:35.700 And it was the first time
00:39:36.760 the president of the country.
00:39:38.320 And this is why you have
00:39:40.000 the same stupid friends you had
00:39:41.580 when you were growing up.
00:39:42.860 I was talking to some of my high school buddies.
00:39:44.540 I said, you know,
00:39:45.500 when President Obama gave me his cell phone number,
00:39:47.600 let's call it.
00:39:50.440 I said, I'm not going to call it.
00:39:52.020 I said, you don't have it.
00:39:53.760 You don't have it.
00:39:54.500 Shut up.
00:39:55.440 I said, no, you shut up.
00:39:56.700 I'm not.
00:39:56.960 Okay, now you're like in fourth grade.
00:39:58.600 I said, no.
00:39:59.660 I said, what?
00:40:00.400 I said, what's that?
00:40:00.900 Okay.
00:40:01.940 Okay, it's 12 o'clock.
00:40:03.020 That's 3 o'clock back here.
00:40:04.800 I said, you want me to go?
00:40:05.400 I'll go.
00:40:06.180 I said, I doubt it.
00:40:07.880 Right here.
00:40:08.660 Barack here.
00:40:09.520 Mr. President?
00:40:10.160 Yeah.
00:40:11.100 Jay Leno.
00:40:11.660 Jay, what can I do for you?
00:40:13.740 Should I lose this number?
00:40:14.980 Lose the number, Jay.
00:40:15.740 Click.
00:40:16.060 And he hangs up.
00:40:16.580 And it was just like the funniest thing.
00:40:18.840 It was like the funniest thing.
00:40:20.060 It just made me laugh.
00:40:21.340 But again, the same stupid friends you had in high school.
00:40:25.640 Do you like talking to politicians?
00:40:28.120 Well, I just like it because it's real.
00:40:30.060 Yeah.
00:40:30.440 You know, with a movie, you always have to do that.
00:40:33.180 And you were good.
00:40:34.280 The movie's awful.
00:40:35.400 You were incredible in one scene.
00:40:38.940 Sean Connery was one of my favorites.
00:40:40.860 Yeah.
00:40:41.300 I like Sean because he was not James Bond.
00:40:46.660 I mean, he was the tough son of a bitch, that guy.
00:40:49.960 I mean, he had been a, did you know who was third runner-up, Mr. Universe, 1953?
00:40:55.240 Yes.
00:40:55.860 Yeah.
00:40:56.280 I mean, he was, and he would come into the Tide show, hey, Jay, Jay, what's the latest filthy
00:41:02.860 joke going about, Jay?
00:41:04.160 You know, and I'd tell him the joke, and he would laugh like a pirate.
00:41:07.260 Whoa!
00:41:08.480 Whoa!
00:41:08.760 Like, I mean, like the most hardy, and you always hear the term, that's a knee slapper.
00:41:14.700 He's the only guy ever to actually slap his knee and do that.
00:41:18.340 And he was just, he was the only guy when he came to the Tide show, because we had these
00:41:22.740 little tiny dressing rooms.
00:41:23.900 He was the only guy who would take a shower at the studio.
00:41:27.820 And he would sing, oh, Scotland, da, da, da, da, da.
00:41:30.840 And the news too, good.
00:41:32.380 Hey, keep it down down there.
00:41:33.420 It's not me.
00:41:33.920 It's Sean Connery, you know?
00:41:35.160 And Sean Connery would be singing in the shower.
00:41:36.820 And he was just very funny, just very funny.
00:41:39.680 He was a tough guy.
00:41:41.140 Yeah.
00:41:41.440 He was a tough guy.
00:41:42.240 In fact, one time, did you ever hear of a guy named Johnny Stampanato?
00:41:47.620 Johnny Stampanato was a gangster who was going out with Leonard Turner.
00:41:51.540 Craig Ferguson told me this story.
00:41:52.720 It was very funny.
00:41:53.860 And Sean Connery had a small part in the movie.
00:41:56.280 And she was sort of flirting with Sean, because he's a handsome guy.
00:42:00.840 Johnny Stampanato pulls a gun on Sean Connery.
00:42:03.900 He takes a gun, smash up the side of the head.
00:42:07.420 Don't bring a gun to me workplace.
00:42:09.980 He empties all the bullets out and gives them back the gun.
00:42:12.740 Yeah.
00:42:13.020 I mean, yeah, just great.
00:42:14.280 It's great.
00:42:14.920 Yeah.
00:42:15.160 Yeah.
00:42:15.540 It's, in some ways, have we lost a little bit of that?
00:42:19.200 You have lost a little bit of that.
00:42:20.360 I mean, that's, you know, my mother's from Scotland, the most conservative woman you could imagine.
00:42:26.800 She's the only man.
00:42:28.040 You know, Jamie, that's Sean Connery.
00:42:30.040 That's a real man, Jamie.
00:42:31.280 I go, ma, I don't want to hear it.
00:42:32.540 That's a real man, Jamie.
00:42:33.840 Ma, I don't want to hear it, ma.
00:42:35.260 You know, she never talked like that about anybody.
00:42:38.260 But, oh, Sean Connery.
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00:43:43.580 I mean, the world you're describing, particularly from the early days, is so different to the
00:43:49.840 world that we have now.
00:43:50.960 Yeah, it is different.
00:43:51.920 But I mean, that's, is it progress?
00:43:53.860 I don't know.
00:43:54.600 You know, I mean, I don't know how you, you know, it's funny because everybody said,
00:44:00.540 well, someday Big Brother, you know, it's going to be terrible.
00:44:04.000 But nobody thinks Big Brother is watching Big Brother.
00:44:07.840 You know what I mean?
00:44:08.340 I mean, I remember, you remember the Rodney King thing, the incidents?
00:44:12.740 Okay.
00:44:14.420 To me, that was the day newspapers died because that was the first time news went unfiltered
00:44:19.660 because when you saw the Rodney King thing on the news, they said, uh, six black men in
00:44:25.880 a Hyundai were driving 115 miles an hour, which is impossible for a Hyundai from that period.
00:44:30.180 And they got pulled over by police and da, da, da, da, da, da.
00:44:34.100 Because in those days, you had a news editor who would look at film and go, boy, this is,
00:44:39.940 this is explosive stuff.
00:44:41.560 This is going to incite riots.
00:44:43.380 Let's just make, you know, like, for example, in Boston, a woman was never raped.
00:44:48.440 She was accosted.
00:44:50.020 So that could be anything from a wolf whistle, somebody pinching your ass, you know, it wasn't,
00:44:55.140 you know, they just wouldn't use the term.
00:44:56.900 So the Rodney King guy, he, he filmed it from his, from his porch and he sent it right to
00:45:04.160 the internet.
00:45:04.920 And that was the first time, maybe not the very first time, but certainly unfiltered
00:45:09.400 news just went up to people, well, that's not what we just saw in the 11 o'clock news.
00:45:13.060 They said, these guys are speeding and all this other kind of stuff, you know?
00:45:16.500 So, so we live in a world now, it's better because what used to be the law is now against
00:45:22.600 the law, which is good.
00:45:23.860 But unfortunately you just see all of it.
00:45:26.240 I mean, the classic story is shock attack are, are, are up 100%.
00:45:32.400 Okay.
00:45:33.180 You had three last year.
00:45:34.380 You have six this year.
00:45:35.960 Rather than just say that, the new shock attack, 100% people, oh my God, get the kids out of
00:45:39.880 the pool.
00:45:40.300 You know, people are worried.
00:45:42.420 Get the kids out of the pool.
00:45:44.880 I know exactly what you mean.
00:45:47.180 We get fed the stuff and then we overreact in response to it.
00:45:50.600 Right.
00:45:50.620 Exactly.
00:45:51.120 Yeah.
00:45:51.280 Exactly.
00:45:51.580 So I think, see, I, I'm an optimist.
00:45:54.260 I think things, I think what happens is the elite have come down a step or two and everybody
00:45:59.800 else has come up a level or two, which I think is great.
00:46:03.900 I mean, you now have protections, you know, like when you watch the comedy animal house,
00:46:10.060 which is done in 79 is a funny scene where they're in this, we're in the fraternity and
00:46:16.420 there's the Muslim kid and the Indian kid and everybody's just making fun of them, you
00:46:21.820 know, which wouldn't happen today.
00:46:23.920 And I suppose it was funny back then, but not if you're Indian or Muslim, you know, uh,
00:46:29.080 those kinds of things.
00:46:30.180 Does it go a bit too far sometimes?
00:46:31.760 Yeah.
00:46:32.100 Okay.
00:46:32.400 But that's what happens with the pendulum.
00:46:34.160 Sometimes the swing is too far, that's too far.
00:46:36.060 Right.
00:46:36.140 But ultimately I don't think it's necessarily a bad thing.
00:46:40.960 And are you on social media?
00:46:42.200 Do you use social media?
00:46:43.140 No, I try not to, you know, I, I, I, someone said, you should send some of your jokes out
00:46:49.080 and I did it and everything just got so misinterpreted.
00:46:53.660 It just, you know, just people mad about things.
00:46:57.260 I was telling him a story before I was in a, uh, Chinese restaurant with my wife, small
00:47:02.860 family restaurant.
00:47:04.520 Mom was running the register and sit like 12 tables and the rest of the family's the
00:47:09.680 cook in the back.
00:47:10.440 Okay.
00:47:11.280 I'm talking to my wife and the woman, the older lady is just bringing the order.
00:47:16.300 I said, man, this woman's really working her ass off.
00:47:19.160 And since this is, this is right near UCLA, the college, a female college student said,
00:47:23.340 ah, she's a server.
00:47:25.880 And I, I said, well, then she, a woman first.
00:47:29.920 I said, you know, I, I try to watch what I say.
00:47:32.620 I didn't say waitress.
00:47:34.000 I didn't say chick.
00:47:35.980 I didn't say stewardess.
00:47:38.160 And if I had said server, I would expect you to say, she's a woman, because I'm defining
00:47:43.440 her by her jaw.
00:47:45.460 So isn't she a woman?
00:47:46.680 I didn't say girl.
00:47:48.100 And she, this, and Sarah credits, she said, well, I guess you're right.
00:47:51.340 I go, well, okay.
00:47:51.960 But I mean, you jump on me.
00:47:53.840 First of all, I'm having a conversation with my wife, you know, and I said, I'm not mad
00:47:58.460 or anything, but I just don't, I don't see your point.
00:48:00.420 Why would you be a server before she's a woman?
00:48:02.580 And then eventually, yeah, but okay, no problem.
00:48:06.880 But I mean, that's the world you live in.
00:48:08.260 People are offended for somebody else.
00:48:10.720 I'm not offended, but I know, you know.
00:48:13.500 And I think it's so interesting.
00:48:15.020 You say you don't use social media because people misinterpret things.
00:48:18.380 I think maybe that's why a lot of people feel like we live in a time where people are really
00:48:23.540 easily offended or whatever, because we all now live on social media where everyone is
00:48:27.640 bitching and moaning and fighting about everything.
00:48:30.060 Right, right.
00:48:30.880 Yeah.
00:48:31.120 And I realized one person has the power of 10,000 people.
00:48:38.240 And if one person says you're a Nazi, well, now you have to defend yourself, which seems
00:48:43.720 ridiculous when there's no, you know.
00:48:45.400 The number of people I meet that now believe we did not walk on the moon.
00:48:50.940 All right.
00:48:52.020 All right.
00:48:52.560 I mean, it seems ridiculous, but that's the one.
00:48:56.000 And what do you think about comedians getting into trouble for jokes and cancellations?
00:49:02.660 Do you think that's the pendulum going too far?
00:49:04.960 Do you think that's another correction?
00:49:06.040 Well, I think, you know, well, the idea of a rape joke has the same career penalty as an actual rape.
00:49:15.400 That doesn't seem fair.
00:49:20.540 You know, I mean, if you do a joke about rape, you're canceled, all your TV appearances are gone,
00:49:26.640 or whatever it might be.
00:49:27.940 If you actually commit the crime, same penalty, same penalty.
00:49:32.920 So, I mean, I don't know what the answer is there.
00:49:35.640 I mean, you know, Louis C.K., I think, is hilarious.
00:49:40.640 Yep.
00:49:41.100 What he did seemed odd to me.
00:49:43.020 I mean, the idea.
00:49:45.400 The guy's bragging about it.
00:49:46.180 See that blonde over there with big boobs?
00:49:48.160 I brought her back to my apartment.
00:49:50.240 Went in the other room and jerked him.
00:49:54.400 Like a legend.
00:49:56.440 I don't see.
00:49:57.440 That doesn't seem like something I would brag about.
00:49:59.820 But, okay.
00:50:01.100 But, I mean, was his crime the same as Harvey Weinstein?
00:50:06.140 Yeah.
00:50:06.440 No, but the penalty is the same.
00:50:08.020 So, I don't know.
00:50:09.400 I mean, I'm sure I'll get in trouble just for saying this.
00:50:11.800 Yeah.
00:50:12.980 It's, we seem to be, this is my issue with it, and see if you agree and push back if you don't.
00:50:18.660 It seems to me that we're living in a world without nuance, where everything is either black or it's white.
00:50:23.380 Well, yeah, exactly.
00:50:24.660 Yeah, that's exactly true.
00:50:26.520 That's exactly where it is.
00:50:27.900 Like the lady with server, woman.
00:50:31.120 Why are we even having this discussion now?
00:50:33.020 Well, you mentioned you're an optimist.
00:50:36.200 Yeah.
00:50:36.420 What are you excited about, Jay?
00:50:37.940 What am I what?
00:50:38.760 Excited about.
00:50:40.180 What am I excited about?
00:50:41.560 Yeah.
00:50:42.040 Oh.
00:50:43.600 Oh.
00:50:44.020 I mean, your show is crushing it on YouTube.
00:50:45.940 I'm very jealous.
00:50:47.960 Yeah, we're doing fine.
00:50:49.280 I mean, I believe you're only as good as your last joke.
00:50:52.420 Mm-hmm.
00:50:52.800 Really.
00:50:53.900 You know?
00:50:54.580 You know, it's so funny.
00:50:55.500 Like, I stopped doing political jokes because the people get so mad.
00:51:02.120 They want to know the joke first before they laugh.
00:51:04.840 Is this pro-Trump or anti-Trump?
00:51:07.180 They want to know where you're coming from.
00:51:09.380 So, I'm trying to write jokes that are political but without politicians.
00:51:15.280 Let me try one of your two words.
00:51:16.900 Please.
00:51:17.040 All right.
00:51:18.960 This guy, he's like a young Barack Obama, charismatic speaker, new guy in his party,
00:51:23.680 picked Democrat or Republican or Tory or whatever.
00:51:26.400 Okay.
00:51:27.000 So, he gets invited to the big presidential nomination convention in New York.
00:51:31.440 And he flies to the night, walks into Madison Square, got 30,000 people sold out.
00:51:36.660 Eight o'clock, the vice president goes on.
00:51:38.260 Crowd goes crazy.
00:51:39.060 Nine o'clock, the president goes crazy.
00:51:41.100 Then the senator, then the mayor, then the police chief, then the postmaster general.
00:51:45.660 And finally, the guy looks at his watch.
00:51:48.400 He's got a speech in his hands.
00:51:49.960 It's 1.30 in the morning.
00:51:52.120 Place is completely empty.
00:51:53.200 All 30,000 people are gone.
00:51:55.740 He looks behind him, sitting in the same row, four seats, but a guy's sitting like this
00:51:59.360 watch.
00:52:00.660 He says, you know something?
00:52:02.000 That guy stayed.
00:52:03.900 That guy stayed.
00:52:04.700 I'm going to give him my speech.
00:52:06.440 Is it those 30,000 people still here?
00:52:08.320 Because that guy stayed.
00:52:10.240 So, he goes, and we must move forward.
00:52:11.780 And America must see this.
00:52:13.500 He talks about half an hour.
00:52:14.840 He comes up to the stage.
00:52:15.420 The guy's still sitting there.
00:52:16.280 He goes down and says, sir, can I ask you a question?
00:52:18.320 What made you stay for my speech?
00:52:20.600 Guy says, oh, I speak next.
00:52:23.200 I mean, it's a political joke.
00:52:25.620 Yeah.
00:52:25.820 And when I tell the audience, that's what I'm going to do, then everybody laughs at it.
00:52:30.640 I don't lose half the crowd.
00:52:32.060 Yeah.
00:52:33.080 That's so interesting that that's the direction you're moving in, and see if you agree with
00:52:37.180 this.
00:52:37.380 But when I watch late night comedy shows now, it feels like they've moved in the other
00:52:41.760 direction.
00:52:42.280 They're leaning into making a point about the other two.
00:52:45.220 Well, you know what's so funny?
00:52:46.060 People seem to say to me, boy, I bet you regret leaving The Tonight Show and not Trump's
00:52:49.800 president.
00:52:50.700 Now, you know something?
00:52:51.540 When you like people, it's so much easier to make fun of them.
00:52:55.500 Yeah.
00:52:55.840 When you don't like them, and I don't like Trump, and not political, just morally unfit
00:53:01.900 to the office, it's hard to keep your rage.
00:53:07.740 Okay, now you're, okay, are you telling me this because of political reasons or because
00:53:13.320 you think it's really funny?
00:53:14.380 I mean, there's always, a joke should be pure.
00:53:16.840 It should just be, just pure jokes, you know?
00:53:19.720 That's the great thing I was telling about Rodney.
00:53:21.440 Rodney Dangerfield and I were great friends.
00:53:23.640 I know in 40 years, I have no idea if he's Republican or Democrat.
00:53:26.300 He just had simple, my favorite joke, he said, I went to my doctor.
00:53:32.520 My doctor said, I want a urine sample, I want a semen sample, and I want a, and I want a-
00:53:38.120 Stool?
00:53:38.420 Stool sample.
00:53:39.440 So I gave him my underpants.
00:53:42.600 It's just a stupid joke.
00:53:45.420 I mean, it's really funny.
00:53:47.140 I mean, it's just, just pure, just, just, the joy is in the joke.
00:53:52.240 I have no, I meet so many comments going, I just want people to understand how I feel.
00:53:56.300 I feel about, I don't think anybody cares how I feel about an issue.
00:54:00.480 We're in the feelings age now, though, Jay.
00:54:02.420 Like, everyone is putting all of themselves out there for everyone to see.
00:54:06.000 Yes, but not everybody, not as successful as Rodney was.
00:54:09.980 No.
00:54:10.260 Because it was just, Rodney worked both sides.
00:54:12.560 Just did jokes.
00:54:14.340 I thank you, here's a joke, thank you.
00:54:16.440 You know, Rodney Dangerfield had an incredible story.
00:54:19.080 Because this is a guy who, when he started out, he failed at his job.
00:54:23.300 He failed at becoming a comedian, went away, came back.
00:54:27.400 Well, you know what it was, because his face did not look like his act.
00:54:32.180 Yeah.
00:54:32.380 I remember, I've known Seinfeld for years, and Jerry and I are really good friends.
00:54:37.840 And when Jerry's like 21 years old, he looks 14.
00:54:41.140 And he had a joke about, you know, when you bring a hooker back to your apartment,
00:54:43.880 I go, first of all, nobody believes you ever got a hooker.
00:54:46.380 Nobody believes you should go back to your apartment.
00:54:47.620 And we both laughed at it, because he looked so, he didn't look like what he was talking about.
00:54:51.980 Yeah.
00:54:52.520 You know, so that's the thing.
00:54:53.980 And Rodney, he started out as a comic, and he had a muse named Joe Ansis.
00:55:01.600 You ever heard this name?
00:55:02.540 No.
00:55:03.040 Okay.
00:55:03.900 Joe Ansis was one of those guys, the funniest guy of everybody, stage fright to death.
00:55:10.400 So he would sit, he would do table comedy.
00:55:13.720 He'd sit with Lenny Bruce and Rodney and all the guys, and he would just say stuff.
00:55:17.620 And guys, whoa, can I buy that?
00:55:18.940 Can I have that joke?
00:55:19.640 Can I have that?
00:55:20.080 And that's where he was.
00:55:21.260 Like, I knew Rodney when Rodney didn't do no respect.
00:55:25.700 He did, like, little bits.
00:55:28.560 He had a bit about, this kind of comedy has sort of fallen out, but he says,
00:55:34.200 as your captain speaking, we're on flight so-and-so at TWA Airlines.
00:55:38.820 Flying over the Grand Canyon right now, look out the left side of the plane,
00:55:42.740 you can see the remains of flight 419 that crashed just six years ago.
00:55:47.280 Bob, you were with me on that one, weren't you?
00:55:48.980 You know?
00:55:50.760 I mean, that's what he, you know, just those sort of character little pieces like that.
00:55:54.820 And then, I don't know if it came from Joe Ansis, but that whole thing about no respect
00:55:58.380 and starting to look like his act, it really came out of that.
00:56:01.880 I'll tell you a funny Rodney story.
00:56:04.200 So, my favorite thing was when I watched Rodney on with Johnny,
00:56:08.320 and Johnny would be the straight man.
00:56:10.320 Things are rough, Rodney?
00:56:11.180 Oh, okay, Jake.
00:56:12.200 But last week, Johnny, I got to tell you, you know.
00:56:14.360 And then he goes, it was really cold.
00:56:16.000 How cold was it?
00:56:16.680 Oh, it was so cold.
00:56:17.680 You know, and just playing the straight man.
00:56:19.900 So, I dreamed of the day when I could do that with Rodney.
00:56:22.780 So, when I got to this night show, whenever I had Rodney on,
00:56:25.280 things are rough, Rodney?
00:56:26.260 Oh, Jay, I'll tell you, terrible, you know.
00:56:28.240 So, one day, about 2004 or 5,
00:56:32.000 now, Rodney's in his 80s now, and a little shaky.
00:56:36.620 And I have him on the tonight show, and he's doing his act, you know.
00:56:39.960 And he's a little off, you know, this gesture,
00:56:42.780 he doesn't know what I tell you.
00:56:43.760 But the hand was like over, just a few little mistakes.
00:56:47.540 Only another comic would notice it if you knew Rodney.
00:56:50.440 So, while he was doing his thing on the show, I said to Debbie,
00:56:53.220 I said, call the paramedics.
00:56:55.000 I think Rodney's having a stroke, you know.
00:56:56.940 She goes, really?
00:56:57.600 Yeah, just call him.
00:56:58.480 Okay.
00:56:59.300 So, Rodney finished.
00:57:00.220 He says, now, Jay, how are you doing?
00:57:01.380 I tell you, I'm okay today, but last week, you know.
00:57:04.340 And he was fine.
00:57:05.520 Okay.
00:57:05.800 And then the show ends.
00:57:06.900 Rodney's in this dressing room.
00:57:07.940 Now, the paramedics show up.
00:57:09.820 I said, Rodney, the paramedics are here.
00:57:11.200 Can they take a look at it?
00:57:11.900 I'm fine.
00:57:12.320 I'm fine.
00:57:12.560 Well, he did have a stroke.
00:57:13.860 And they took Rodney out in a stretcher.
00:57:17.420 And a couple weeks later, it got worse.
00:57:19.880 And his wife, Joan, called me.
00:57:21.360 He said, Jay, Rodney's in the hospital again.
00:57:23.240 So, I drive over to the hospital.
00:57:24.540 And Rodney's lying there like this.
00:57:26.140 Eyes are open.
00:57:27.260 And she says, the doctor says he can hear us, but he can't respond.
00:57:30.440 So, I'm telling him how much we love him, how great he was to all us young comics,
00:57:33.660 letting us work Rodney, the Rodney Dangerville nightclub in New York,
00:57:36.860 and how great he was to everybody.
00:57:39.920 So, his wife goes, Rodney.
00:57:42.060 Jay, put your finger in Rodney's hand.
00:57:45.480 She goes, Rodney, if you know it's Jay, try and squeeze his finger.
00:57:48.620 So, I put my finger in Rodney's hand, you know.
00:57:51.780 And I said to him, Rodney, that's not my finger.
00:58:00.000 And he did this.
00:58:01.540 He just moved for a second.
00:58:03.020 And his wife, he moved.
00:58:04.360 And to get a laugh out of Rodney in that situation, it just really made me feel good.
00:58:10.860 And Joan got it.
00:58:11.880 We weren't being mean.
00:58:13.440 It was just, he was a comic, you know.
00:58:16.000 But you know, Rodney, that's not my finger.
00:58:17.600 And he, nothing changed except he just did a twitch.
00:58:22.380 And he passed away, oh, probably a couple of days later.
00:58:26.440 But, I mean, it was great to get that reaction from Rodney.
00:58:29.580 I mean, he was a comic till the end, you know.
00:58:32.000 It's a beautiful story, Jay.
00:58:33.220 Oh, it's a wonderful story.
00:58:34.200 He's a great guy.
00:58:35.000 He's a great guy.
00:58:35.860 Beautiful story.
00:58:37.300 We were going to ask you a couple of questions from our supporters in a second.
00:58:41.160 But before we do, we always end the main section of the interview with the same question, which
00:58:44.320 is what's the one thing we're not talking about that we really should be?
00:58:46.860 It's not my call.
00:58:49.600 It's your call.
00:58:50.260 The idea is, well, I feel that people have to know.
00:58:54.640 I mean, as a society.
00:58:55.820 That's my favorite thing is watching Jerry Springer.
00:58:57.920 I want everyone on national television to know about this guy.
00:59:01.620 Well, nobody cares.
00:59:03.020 Nobody cares.
00:59:03.440 What's the one thing we all need to know?
00:59:06.680 That's not my job.
00:59:09.120 You know, there's nothing harder than writing a joke.
00:59:15.240 I love it when I see comedians get TV shows where they're the inquisitive reporter.
00:59:19.520 You know why?
00:59:20.220 Because it's easier than writing a joke.
00:59:22.660 Everything's easier than writing a joke.
00:59:24.340 It's the hardest thing in the world to actually sit down and write jokes.
00:59:28.160 So they'll come up with any excuse.
00:59:30.720 I always hated it when I was, like, whenever I go on TV,
00:59:33.440 I do stand-up.
00:59:35.240 I don't come out and sit on the couch because people go,
00:59:38.820 as a kid, I would go, oh, I wanted to see them do comedy, you know?
00:59:44.760 No one is interesting.
00:59:47.420 What you do is interesting or what you have to say is interesting
00:59:50.160 or what you're singing.
00:59:51.480 But really, there are very few people that are that interesting.
00:59:55.400 So to me, you should bring something more to the party, you know,
01:00:00.220 if that makes any sense.
01:00:01.500 All right.
01:00:01.860 Head on over to Locals where we ask Jay your questions.
01:00:05.900 Kelly Francis says, oh, my God,
01:00:08.480 you must bring up the fact that Francis doesn't know how to drive.
01:00:13.040 Oh.
01:00:14.700 Oh, I wish I'd known that before we started this interview.
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