14 Strategies to Prepare for High-Stakes Meetings
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Summary
You're going to meet a lot of people in your life, many but there's going to be a few meetings, not that many of them, that are high stakes meetings that could completely change your life. When it comes down to these meetings, if you do it right, your life changes. If you don't do them right, it's a missed opportunity. Here's how to prepare for a high stakes meeting.
Transcript
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You're going to meet a lot of people in your life, many.
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But there's going to be a few meetings, not that many of them, that are going to be high
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stakes meetings that could completely change your life.
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When it comes down to these meetings, if you do it right, your life changes.
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If you don't do it right, it's a missed opportunity.
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Today I'm going to talk to you about how to prepare for a high stakes meeting.
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So I have 14 points here I'm going to cover with you, but the first one is very simple.
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Anytime you're having a high stakes meetings, you got to be thinking about the other person's
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And at the same time, meaning if I'm going in and I'm meeting with a big insurance company,
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an investor, a client that's a $20 million client, a $10 million client, you have to think about
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their situation and get access as much information to them as possible.
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And knowing when you're dealing with high stakes meetings, it's typically ran by somebody with
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And you have to know that people are driven typically by three different things.
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You got greed, you got fear and you got saving face.
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If any of those things are not in the right place, you could potentially hurt this meeting's
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So, but if you're going in and you're thinking about them, how can I speak to their needs?
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How can I speak to their frustrations that I can bring that need for them?
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And at the same time, I respect the fact that people take action based on fear, greed and
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Next point to be thinking about is when you're going into a meeting, don't act.
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I am at a position right now where a lot of people want to have high stakes meetings
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I'm going to sit down with me as somebody that's done tens of thousands of meetings and
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sit downs with different people and up met with some of the most random, powerful people
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I know when someone's acting and I know when someone's being, there's a big difference.
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If you've seen the documentary with Zlatan, if you don't know who Zlatan is, he's a very
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There's a part in his documentary, which is very powerful.
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Here's a young 16, 17, 18 year old kid that's about to go sign a massive multi-million dollar
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contract and his manager is sitting next to him.
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This is a young teenager telling the manager, act like you belong here.
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If you're having a high stakes meeting, don't go in there trying to act like somebody else,
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Be who you are, the way you are, be who you are, present yourself in the best way possible,
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but be who you are and the other person is going to appreciate it, especially if it's
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So even this morning I had a call with probably one of the most powerful figures in the Iranian
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community around the world that's very well known.
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Everyone knows who this person is in this community.
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We had a 90 minute conversation with him this morning.
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You know how many pages of notes has been read?
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Just because I know when he's on with a general, a colonel, and a PR person, and I'm having
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I have to be ready when I'm having high stakes meetings.
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I see a lot of times people who have high stakes meetings that life could change for them.
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And look, I've been on the other side when a 23 year old salesman, I'm about to sit with
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a client that could make me a hundred thousand dollars of commission and I'm winging it.
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Do you think that person is going to do business with somebody that's winging it?
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So when you're going in, do research and prepare because the other person is going to think
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They're going to say, let me get this straight.
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If this person did this much research and preparation to meet with me, what is he or
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she like if we do decide to do business together?
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They're going to be this diligent about their work.
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Next one, be prepared to have an opinion with weight behind it.
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Sometimes when you're sitting with high stakes people, they may ask you a random question.
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So what do you think about what's going on in America today?
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Let's just say you're meeting with the stock market and somebody says, so what are your thoughts
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about what Ray Dalio says with some investment philosophies?
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If it's in that space, you better have an opinion for it.
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You can't give a general opinion about it, but at the same time, you can't give an opinion
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with disrespect because you made disrespect a side that they lean towards.
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So you got to give your opinion without disrespecting everybody, but you got to have an opinion with
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some weight behind it because typically high stakes meeting people ask weird questions.
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They don't ask regular questions because the reason why they ask weird questions, they want
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What are the values and principles of you as a human being?
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Next is respecting sensitive issues that may arise.
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Meaning if I'm sitting with somebody that I'm doing business with, I have to be sensitive
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I have to be sensitive to know what issues affect their business, their company, their
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family, their certain belief system that they have.
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And you have to give a lot of respect to the sensitive issues.
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You step on the sensitive issues, you lose the deal.
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If you had a camera on a lot of the meetings, you can predict when the sale was lost.
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Very simple when a person goes like this, or a person goes like this, or a person starts
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watching TV, or a person steps away, you lost them.
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You have to figure right away to respect those sensitive issues.
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So when you're preparing on a sheet of paper, before you meet with them, you're writing
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all this stuff down, what are the potential three to five sensitive topics that could
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I'm going to respect those things when they come up.
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Look, I totally respect your position when it comes down to this.
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I understand why you would have a feeling like that.
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Having said that, here's an area that we can talk about when it comes down to this, and
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I feel I can bring value in this area, and you can kind of process it there.
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Have three to five questions ready to ask that are the right kind of questions.
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You know, if you are Chris Wallace, and you are assigned with the job to moderate the first
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debate between Trump and Biden, okay, that's what his assignment's been.
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Chris Wallace is the first to moderate the debate between Biden and Trump.
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He's making a list of questions to ask both of them.
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He's calling to find out who would give him feedback and advice on what questions to ask,
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Cross them off and come up with the best 20, then cross the 20 off and come up with the
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best 10, then cross the 10 off and come up with the best 5, then cross the 5 off and
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come up with the best 3, and then have the one question.
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You got to look at it the same way when you're meeting with a high-stakes person to have that
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A lot of people want to say things like, oh my gosh, you're so amazing, you're so this,
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And actually, high-stakes folks are not really looking for flattery.
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They know the difference between a compliment and a flattery.
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And the difference is when you're given a compliment, and if you can unpack it, there's weight behind
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You know, I really respect the decision you made to do this, this, this.
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It was a very challenging time when you stood your ground and you had a lot of opposition
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And in today's times, it's very hard to find people that are willing to stand up because
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And you could have gotten a lot of negative effects from this, from the media, but you
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I have a lot of respect for you for doing that.
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There's weight behind the compliment I've given.
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So if you are going to compliment, avoid any form of flattery.
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Remember how earlier I told you needs, frustrations, desires, and, you know, fear, greed, and, you
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So the concerns may be, I think the person's going to probably bring up X, Y, Z. Okay, great.
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They're probably going to be worried about the market and election.
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Know that the election is going to come up because this person's got $3 million and they're
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thinking about rolling over the $3 million and they're worried about the current elections
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and they want to roll over the money with you post-election.
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I am thinking about listing my house, but before I say yes to you, I don't know if this
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is a good time to sell it or it's better to sell it later on.
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And then you have to be able to say, well, John, you know, I understand one of your concerns
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maybe whether you list a house now or we wait post-election.
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Let me give you an idea why this is a good time for us to get started to list a house.
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Your house is a $1.5 million house and I think you can get probably $1.5 to $1.6 million house.
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The comps on the house down the street that sold 1.8 to 323, you know, Pennsylvania Avenue.
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When it comes down to buyers in your market, they're spending money right now.
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If you had a $350,000 house, I may advise you to hold off a little bit for another couple
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But now when it comes down to 1.5, you see what you just did?
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You address the concern, you address something that could come up and why they ought to think
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And they're sitting there saying, okay, fair, I was thinking about that.
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Now you took that one out and one by one by one, you can do that if you're having these
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When I go into my meeting, first, we're going to talk about this, then this, then this, then this,
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But have an outline, if you have the outline, say you have a folder that you carry with you
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and you open it up, you can write your outline at the top of the paper.
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It's not like they're going to see it or even if they see it, it's a way of being prepared.
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For many years I used to do two, three, four, five presentations every week in front of people.
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My folder would have my five to seven points and each story that had to do with that point
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And I would give that message out and the audience would say, okay, this is when you tell
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When you tell this story, it was so prepared and then eventually I didn't need this anymore
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because I was ready to do it over and over and over again.
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Have an outline prepared when you're given this message.
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With role play with a friend, a spouse, a business partner, somebody that can role play
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They say this, I'm going to say this, here's how I'm going to open it up.
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Next, 11, ask trusted advisors for feedback to keep in mind prior to the meeting.
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You know how I said Chris Wallace, if he's conducting the debate and he's monitoring the debate between
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Biden and Trump, he's probably going to call all his friends and say, what question would
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And he's going to ask questions both on the left and the right in the middle to see who's
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going to come up with the right questions and topics.
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You ought to have some trusted advisors to get counsel from as well.
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Next one is put yourself into the best possible frame before the meeting.
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I had a rule of thumb, if I ever ran a sales meeting and one of my guys was assigned to
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speak to the audience with the customer clients, everybody else was instructed.
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I don't want any negative news to go to the speaker.
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Leave the speaker alone, get him whatever he wants to drink, whatever he wants to eat, whatever
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puts them in the best mood to be ready for the meeting, do that.
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The same thing you ought to do with yourself prior to big high stakes meetings is make sure
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Listen to the last one is build a reputation for over-delivering when you do have high stakes
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For example, you know, if we invite General Mattis to speak, and General Mattis doesn't
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do a lot of speaking engagements, but General Mattis is being invited and Washington Speakers
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Bureau contacts him and says, listen, I think you ought to consider this one.
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And I got a handwritten note written on the wall here by President Bush.
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He makes one phone call, hey, President Bush, I'm being invited to speak at this company
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And I know you did a speaking engagement for them last year.
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98% of the time I say no, I'm going to say yes to you.
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There is a reputation when the late Kobe Bryant agreed to come and speak at our event.
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You know, we had Kevin Hart the year before, and Kevin Hart was treated royally.
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That experience of over-delivering in anything you do.
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Because I spent five years writing this book, and I'm very comfortable promoting the product
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So when people send me a letter and they say, Pat, it's a USA Today bestseller, it was
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If there's any list you want to be on, it's a business book.
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So it's not only a Wall Street Journal bestseller, it's a number one Wall Street Journal bestseller.
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Toronto Star, so it's now an international bestseller.
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Do you realize how many people have bought the audiobook?
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Nearly 20,000 people have bought the audiobook, and let alone the copies here translated.
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Now it's going into Brazil and Portuguese and Mandarin and all this other stuff.
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You've never seen me promote a book the way I promote this book.
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Because a lot of time has been put into this book, your next five moves.
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The same way whatever business dealings you do with people.
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If you create a reputation of over-delivering, people want to do business with you over and
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over and over again because they all talk to each other.
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Last but not least, same thing we did today in this meeting that I had earlier this morning
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with this Iranian figurehead that we had a conversation with today.
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At the end of every meeting that I have with a high-stakes person, the meeting ends with,
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what is our next five moves that we have from this meeting?
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So one, I owe you, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom.
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Two, your team owes me, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom.
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Three, you're going to make an introduction to me, to John and Bobby, and they're going
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One, I will get back to you with a day to do this.
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And five, you were going to send me something to look at that's a letter written from the
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This is how you prepare for a high-stakes meeting.
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Again, this is something I can speak about for hours to really get into the details of these.
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And if you're somebody that's watching and saying, Pat, this was very useful.
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I have a sales course that you never hear me promote the sales course.
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It's my sales system that I teach to 16,000 agents over the last, you know, 10, 11 years.
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I've been teaching this since 2002 is what I've been teaching.
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But over the last 10 or 11 years, well, my specific company, if you have any interest for
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the sales system, it's the course is called the Vault Academy.
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You can go below to click on the link of the Vault Academy to get this content on how to
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And on top of that, if you want to get more content on this, on the specific topics of
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negotiation, I did another video titled 14 Common Negotiation Mistakes.
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If you've never watched this video before, click over to watch this.
00:15:30.120
If you want to learn about my PBD sales system to purchase, go click on the link below in the
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description, in the description below and you'll find it.
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