Valuetainment - September 08, 2020


14 Strategies to Prepare for High-Stakes Meetings


Episode Stats

Length

15 minutes

Words per Minute

223.27856

Word Count

3,515

Sentence Count

232


Summary


Transcript

00:00:00.280 You're going to meet a lot of people in your life, many.
00:00:02.160 But there's going to be a few meetings, not that many of them, that are going to be high
00:00:05.800 stakes meetings that could completely change your life.
00:00:10.340 When it comes down to these meetings, if you do it right, your life changes.
00:00:15.000 If you don't do it right, it's a missed opportunity.
00:00:17.440 Today I'm going to talk to you about how to prepare for a high stakes meeting.
00:00:26.240 So I have 14 points here I'm going to cover with you, but the first one is very simple.
00:00:29.460 Anytime you're having a high stakes meetings, you got to be thinking about the other person's
00:00:33.040 desires, needs and frustrations.
00:00:36.200 And at the same time, meaning if I'm going in and I'm meeting with a big insurance company,
00:00:40.780 an investor, a client that's a $20 million client, a $10 million client, you have to think about
00:00:46.920 their situation and get access as much information to them as possible.
00:00:50.780 And knowing when you're dealing with high stakes meetings, it's typically ran by somebody with
00:00:55.620 a lot of ego.
00:00:56.900 And you have to know that people are driven typically by three different things.
00:01:00.420 You got greed, you got fear and you got saving face.
00:01:04.560 If any of those things are not in the right place, you could potentially hurt this meeting's
00:01:09.080 chances of going the way you want it to go.
00:01:11.020 So, but if you're going in and you're thinking about them, how can I speak to their needs?
00:01:15.980 How can I speak to their desires?
00:01:17.580 How can I speak to their frustrations that I can bring that need for them?
00:01:21.100 And at the same time, I respect the fact that people take action based on fear, greed and
00:01:27.480 saving face.
00:01:28.760 I'll make my proper adjustments.
00:01:30.360 Next point to be thinking about is when you're going into a meeting, don't act.
00:01:34.620 Be.
00:01:35.620 Let me explain what I mean by this.
00:01:37.620 I am at a position right now where a lot of people want to have high stakes meetings
00:01:40.840 with me.
00:01:41.840 I'm going to sit down with me as somebody that's done tens of thousands of meetings and
00:01:45.160 sit downs with different people and up met with some of the most random, powerful people
00:01:49.200 in the world from different spaces.
00:01:51.000 I know when someone's acting and I know when someone's being, there's a big difference.
00:01:56.160 If you've seen the documentary with Zlatan, if you don't know who Zlatan is, he's a very
00:01:59.440 famous soccer player.
00:02:00.440 I think 37, 38 years old.
00:02:02.400 He just signed to go back to AC Milan.
00:02:03.940 He played for galaxy for a while.
00:02:06.260 There's a part in his documentary, which is very powerful.
00:02:09.920 Here's a young 16, 17, 18 year old kid that's about to go sign a massive multi-million dollar
00:02:16.480 contract and his manager is sitting next to him.
00:02:19.860 And they have this clip in the documentary.
00:02:22.080 You know what he whispers to his manager?
00:02:24.300 He says, hey, what's the matter with you?
00:02:26.180 Won't you act like you belong here?
00:02:28.540 His manager's in his forties, fifties.
00:02:31.020 This is a young teenager telling the manager, act like you belong here.
00:02:34.960 When you look at Zlatan, he is.
00:02:37.860 He is who he is.
00:02:38.860 He's not acting.
00:02:39.860 This is who I am.
00:02:40.860 If you're having a high stakes meeting, don't go in there trying to act like somebody else,
00:02:45.420 hoping to impress somebody.
00:02:46.900 People can read through the BS.
00:02:48.420 Be who you are, the way you are, be who you are, present yourself in the best way possible,
00:02:53.540 but be who you are and the other person is going to appreciate it, especially if it's
00:02:56.500 a real high stakes meeting.
00:02:57.780 Next one.
00:02:58.780 I'm big on doing a lot of research.
00:03:00.360 I'm big on doing a lot of preparation.
00:03:02.840 So even this morning I had a call with probably one of the most powerful figures in the Iranian
00:03:09.340 community around the world that's very well known.
00:03:12.140 Everyone knows who this person is in this community.
00:03:14.440 Some love him, some hate him.
00:03:15.680 We had a 90 minute conversation with him this morning.
00:03:17.740 You know how many pages of notes was taken?
00:03:20.480 You know how many pages of notes has been read?
00:03:22.880 You know how many articles has been read?
00:03:25.220 Just because I know when he's on with a general, a colonel, and a PR person, and I'm having
00:03:29.980 this conversation with these folks.
00:03:31.720 I have to be ready when I'm having high stakes meetings.
00:03:34.520 I see a lot of times people who have high stakes meetings that life could change for them.
00:03:38.440 They just kind of go and winging it.
00:03:39.980 They spend 10 minutes in an interview.
00:03:41.660 They spend 20 minutes in an interview.
00:03:43.160 And look, I've been on the other side when a 23 year old salesman, I'm about to sit with
00:03:46.720 a client that could make me a hundred thousand dollars of commission and I'm winging it.
00:03:49.720 Do you think that person is going to do business with somebody that's winging it?
00:03:53.240 Absolutely not.
00:03:54.240 So when you're going in, do research and prepare because the other person is going to think
00:03:58.860 like this.
00:03:59.860 They're going to say, let me get this straight.
00:04:01.760 If this person did this much research and preparation to meet with me, what is he or
00:04:07.440 she like if we do decide to do business together?
00:04:10.880 They're going to be this diligent about their work.
00:04:13.460 I want to do business with somebody like this.
00:04:15.480 You gain credibility with them.
00:04:16.880 So that's the third point.
00:04:18.220 Next one, be prepared to have an opinion with weight behind it.
00:04:21.720 Sometimes when you're sitting with high stakes people, they may ask you a random question.
00:04:25.040 So what do you think about what's going on in America today?
00:04:27.000 You cannot say a lightweight answer, you know?
00:04:30.480 So what are your opinions?
00:04:31.760 Let's just say you're meeting with the stock market and somebody says, so what are your thoughts
00:04:35.220 about what Ray Dalio says with some investment philosophies?
00:04:39.280 If it's in that space, you better have an opinion for it.
00:04:41.820 You can't give a general opinion about it, but at the same time, you can't give an opinion
00:04:45.500 with disrespect because you made disrespect a side that they lean towards.
00:04:49.120 Remember, saving face.
00:04:50.120 So you got to give your opinion without disrespecting everybody, but you got to have an opinion with
00:04:54.780 some weight behind it because typically high stakes meeting people ask weird questions.
00:04:58.880 They don't ask regular questions because the reason why they ask weird questions, they want
00:05:03.060 to find out the character.
00:05:04.260 What's your character?
00:05:06.240 What are the values and principles of you as a human being?
00:05:10.040 You ought to be ready for that.
00:05:11.040 Next is respecting sensitive issues that may arise.
00:05:15.220 Meaning if I'm sitting with somebody that I'm doing business with, I have to be sensitive
00:05:20.960 to know who their enemies are.
00:05:23.100 I have to be sensitive to know what issues affect their business, their company, their
00:05:27.460 family, their certain belief system that they have.
00:05:31.160 And you have to give a lot of respect to the sensitive issues.
00:05:34.320 You step on the sensitive issues, you lose the deal.
00:05:36.980 It's very simple by the way.
00:05:38.200 If you had a camera on a lot of the meetings, you can predict when the sale was lost.
00:05:42.840 Very simple when a person goes like this, or a person goes like this, or a person starts
00:05:47.020 watching TV, or a person steps away, you lost them.
00:05:50.440 This meeting's been already lost.
00:05:51.920 You have to figure right away to respect those sensitive issues.
00:05:55.200 So when you're preparing on a sheet of paper, before you meet with them, you're writing
00:05:58.920 all this stuff down, what are the potential three to five sensitive topics that could
00:06:02.860 come up?
00:06:03.860 Boom, boom, boom, boom, boom.
00:06:04.860 Great.
00:06:05.860 I'm going to respect those things when they come up.
00:06:07.160 Look, I totally respect your position when it comes down to this.
00:06:09.540 I understand why you would have a feeling like that.
00:06:11.800 Totally respect it.
00:06:12.800 Having said that, here's an area that we can talk about when it comes down to this, and
00:06:15.820 I feel I can bring value in this area, and you can kind of process it there.
00:06:19.580 Still giving them respect for those areas.
00:06:21.580 Have three to five questions ready to ask that are the right kind of questions.
00:06:28.200 You know, if you are Chris Wallace, and you are assigned with the job to moderate the first
00:06:36.780 debate between Trump and Biden, okay, that's what his assignment's been.
00:06:40.040 Chris Wallace is the first to moderate the debate between Biden and Trump.
00:06:44.320 You know what he's doing right now?
00:06:46.260 He's making a list of questions to ask both of them.
00:06:48.940 He's calling to find out who would give him feedback and advice on what questions to ask,
00:06:54.140 but he's got a list of 100 questions on paper.
00:06:57.380 And then you know what he has to do?
00:06:58.820 Cross them off and come up with the best 20, then cross the 20 off and come up with the
00:07:02.520 best 10, then cross the 10 off and come up with the best 5, then cross the 5 off and
00:07:06.340 come up with the best 3, and then have the one question.
00:07:09.380 The one question that's the main question.
00:07:11.280 You got to look at it the same way when you're meeting with a high-stakes person to have that
00:07:14.300 kind of processing in place as well.
00:07:17.300 Avoid flattery.
00:07:18.940 A lot of people want to say things like, oh my gosh, you're so amazing, you're so this,
00:07:21.880 you're so that.
00:07:22.860 People are accustomed to that.
00:07:24.820 And actually, high-stakes folks are not really looking for flattery.
00:07:29.720 They know the difference between a compliment and a flattery.
00:07:32.240 And the difference is when you're given a compliment, and if you can unpack it, there's weight behind
00:07:40.000 it.
00:07:40.800 I don't know if this makes sense.
00:07:41.820 Let me explain.
00:07:42.540 You know, I really respect the decision you made to do this, this, this.
00:07:45.300 Here's why.
00:07:46.300 It was a very challenging time when you stood your ground and you had a lot of opposition
00:07:50.420 that didn't agree with you.
00:07:52.460 And in today's times, it's very hard to find people that are willing to stand up because
00:07:56.360 the media is pushing back.
00:07:57.440 And you could have gotten a lot of negative effects from this, from the media, but you
00:08:02.060 still did that.
00:08:03.060 I have a lot of respect for you for doing that.
00:08:04.060 It's not easy to do nowadays.
00:08:05.720 There's weight behind the compliment I've given.
00:08:07.620 It's not flattery.
00:08:08.880 So if you are going to compliment, avoid any form of flattery.
00:08:12.940 Next, anticipate the other party's concerns.
00:08:15.220 So again, you write things down.
00:08:16.420 Remember how earlier I told you needs, frustrations, desires, and, you know, fear, greed, and, you
00:08:22.640 know, saving face.
00:08:24.020 This is their concerns.
00:08:26.220 So the concerns may be, I think the person's going to probably bring up X, Y, Z. Okay, great.
00:08:31.000 I think this person's a conservative investor.
00:08:33.260 They're probably going to be worried about the market and election.
00:08:35.780 Know that the election is going to come up because this person's got $3 million and they're
00:08:38.840 thinking about rolling over the $3 million and they're worried about the current elections
00:08:42.580 and they want to roll over the money with you post-election.
00:08:46.260 How do you address that concern, right?
00:08:48.280 Make a list of all these concerns.
00:08:49.860 You know what?
00:08:50.860 I am thinking about listing my house, but before I say yes to you, I don't know if this
00:08:54.180 is a good time to sell it or it's better to sell it later on.
00:08:56.980 And then you have to be able to say, well, John, you know, I understand one of your concerns
00:09:00.460 maybe whether you list a house now or we wait post-election.
00:09:03.700 Let me give you an idea why this is a good time for us to get started to list a house.
00:09:07.400 Your house is a $1.5 million house and I think you can get probably $1.5 to $1.6 million house.
00:09:13.800 The comps on the house down the street that sold 1.8 to 323, you know, Pennsylvania Avenue.
00:09:18.960 Okay.
00:09:19.960 That one sold for this much.
00:09:20.960 This one sold over here.
00:09:22.160 When it comes down to buyers in your market, they're spending money right now.
00:09:26.940 If you had a $350,000 house, I may advise you to hold off a little bit for another couple
00:09:31.760 of months.
00:09:32.760 But now when it comes down to 1.5, you see what you just did?
00:09:34.840 You address the concern, you address something that could come up and why they ought to think
00:09:39.460 about it.
00:09:40.460 And they're sitting there saying, okay, fair, I was thinking about that.
00:09:42.960 Now you took that one out and one by one by one, you can do that if you're having these
00:09:45.820 high stakes meetings.
00:09:46.820 Next, create an outline.
00:09:48.940 Outline of points to touch.
00:09:49.940 Okay.
00:09:50.940 When I go into my meeting, first, we're going to talk about this, then this, then this, then this,
00:09:53.340 then the closing is going to be this.
00:09:54.820 But have an outline, if you have the outline, say you have a folder that you carry with you
00:09:58.780 and you open it up, you can write your outline at the top of the paper.
00:10:01.780 It's not like they're going to see it or even if they see it, it's a way of being prepared.
00:10:06.080 You simply write it.
00:10:07.080 For many years I used to do two, three, four, five presentations every week in front of people.
00:10:11.580 My folder would have my five to seven points and each story that had to do with that point
00:10:17.580 every single time.
00:10:18.880 And I would give that message out and the audience would say, okay, this is when you tell
00:10:21.900 this story.
00:10:22.900 When you tell this story, it was so prepared and then eventually I didn't need this anymore
00:10:26.220 because I was ready to do it over and over and over again.
00:10:28.820 Have an outline prepared when you're given this message.
00:10:31.320 Next, role play the meeting several times.
00:10:34.020 With role play with a friend, a spouse, a business partner, somebody that can role play
00:10:38.340 the meeting.
00:10:39.340 They say this, I'm going to say this, here's how I'm going to open it up.
00:10:40.840 Here's what I'm going to do over here.
00:10:41.840 But role play the meeting.
00:10:42.840 Next, 11, ask trusted advisors for feedback to keep in mind prior to the meeting.
00:10:47.980 You know how I said Chris Wallace, if he's conducting the debate and he's monitoring the debate between
00:10:52.020 Biden and Trump, he's probably going to call all his friends and say, what question would
00:10:55.540 you ask?
00:10:56.540 And he's going to ask questions both on the left and the right in the middle to see who's
00:10:59.740 going to come up with the right questions and topics.
00:11:01.860 How should I ask this properly?
00:11:03.300 He has trusted advisors.
00:11:04.400 You ought to have some trusted advisors to get counsel from as well.
00:11:07.360 Next one is put yourself into the best possible frame before the meeting.
00:11:11.520 You don't want any negative meetings.
00:11:12.980 I had a rule of thumb, if I ever ran a sales meeting and one of my guys was assigned to
00:11:19.800 speak to the audience with the customer clients, everybody else was instructed.
00:11:23.860 I don't want any negative news to go to the speaker.
00:11:28.560 Leave the speaker alone, get him whatever he wants to drink, whatever he wants to eat, whatever
00:11:33.220 puts them in the best mood to be ready for the meeting, do that.
00:11:36.960 The same thing you ought to do with yourself prior to big high stakes meetings is make sure
00:11:40.860 you're mentally in the right place.
00:11:42.900 Listen to the last one is build a reputation for over-delivering when you do have high stakes
00:11:47.880 meetings.
00:11:48.880 For example, you know, if we invite General Mattis to speak, and General Mattis doesn't
00:11:53.340 do a lot of speaking engagements, but General Mattis is being invited and Washington Speakers
00:11:58.280 Bureau contacts him and says, listen, I think you ought to consider this one.
00:12:01.180 Who have they had in the past before?
00:12:02.720 They had President Bush.
00:12:04.080 And I got a handwritten note written on the wall here by President Bush.
00:12:07.240 He makes one phone call, hey, President Bush, I'm being invited to speak at this company
00:12:11.400 over here.
00:12:13.400 And I know you did a speaking engagement for them last year.
00:12:14.400 What was your experience like?
00:12:15.400 It was incredible.
00:12:16.400 They treated me royally.
00:12:17.380 Everything was organized.
00:12:18.380 These guys are pros.
00:12:19.380 Perfect.
00:12:20.380 98% of the time I say no, I'm going to say yes to you.
00:12:22.360 Why?
00:12:23.360 There is a reputation when the late Kobe Bryant agreed to come and speak at our event.
00:12:28.380 You know, we had Kevin Hart the year before, and Kevin Hart was treated royally.
00:12:32.200 That experience of over-delivering in anything you do.
00:12:35.160 I write a book, your next five moves.
00:12:36.360 Pat, why are you promoting your book so much?
00:12:38.800 Because I spent five years writing this book, and I'm very comfortable promoting the product
00:12:43.560 that I've spent so much time on.
00:12:45.920 I'm not uncomfortable selling this.
00:12:48.340 So when people send me a letter and they say, Pat, it's a USA Today bestseller, it was
00:12:51.600 a number one Wall Street Journal bestseller.
00:12:54.720 Number one Wall Street Journal bestseller?
00:12:56.280 If there's any list you want to be on, it's a business book.
00:12:59.040 You want to be on Wall Street Journal.
00:13:00.540 So it's not only a Wall Street Journal bestseller, it's a number one Wall Street Journal bestseller.
00:13:04.400 This is great.
00:13:05.400 Toronto Star, so it's now an international bestseller.
00:13:08.560 Do you realize how many people have bought the audiobook?
00:13:10.280 Nearly 20,000 people have bought the audiobook, and let alone the copies here translated.
00:13:15.280 Now it's going into Brazil and Portuguese and Mandarin and all this other stuff.
00:13:19.060 I'm not surprised.
00:13:20.180 Not from a cocky place.
00:13:21.740 I over-delivered with this book.
00:13:23.900 I've never promoted a book.
00:13:25.180 This is not the first book I've written.
00:13:26.360 I've written a few more.
00:13:27.360 You've never seen me promote a book the way I promote this book.
00:13:29.900 Why?
00:13:30.900 Because a lot of time has been put into this book, your next five moves.
00:13:33.340 The same way whatever business dealings you do with people.
00:13:36.500 If you create a reputation of over-delivering, people want to do business with you over and
00:13:40.340 over and over again because they all talk to each other.
00:13:42.420 Last but not least, same thing we did today in this meeting that I had earlier this morning
00:13:47.220 with this Iranian figurehead that we had a conversation with today.
00:13:52.780 At the end of every meeting that I have with a high-stakes person, the meeting ends with,
00:13:58.360 what is our next five moves that we have from this meeting?
00:14:01.080 So one, I owe you, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom.
00:14:05.280 Two, your team owes me, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom.
00:14:08.940 Three, you're going to make an introduction to me, to John and Bobby, and they're going
00:14:13.200 to give me this.
00:14:14.780 One, I will get back to you with a day to do this.
00:14:17.620 And five, you were going to send me something to look at that's a letter written from the
00:14:21.940 1980s that you want me to take a look at.
00:14:24.440 Did I miss anything else?
00:14:25.940 No, you got it all.
00:14:27.940 Perfect.
00:14:28.940 Thank you so much for your time.
00:14:29.940 I look forward to the follow-up.
00:14:31.220 You see how that works out when you do this?
00:14:33.440 Everybody walks away saying, okay, clear.
00:14:34.620 I know what I've got to do.
00:14:35.620 I know where I'm going next.
00:14:36.660 This is how you prepare for a high-stakes meeting.
00:14:38.660 Again, this is something I can speak about for hours to really get into the details of these.
00:14:43.000 And if you're somebody that's watching and saying, Pat, this was very useful.
00:14:46.220 I kind of want more of this.
00:14:47.940 No problem.
00:14:48.940 I have a sales course that you never hear me promote the sales course.
00:14:51.880 You have a sales course I shot.
00:14:53.040 It's nearly three hours of content.
00:14:54.880 It's my sales system that I teach to 16,000 agents over the last, you know, 10, 11 years.
00:14:59.760 I've been teaching this since 2002 is what I've been teaching.
00:15:02.640 But over the last 10 or 11 years, well, my specific company, if you have any interest for
00:15:06.720 the sales system, it's the course is called the Vault Academy.
00:15:10.040 You can go below to click on the link of the Vault Academy to get this content on how to
00:15:14.860 be even better on the sales side.
00:15:16.040 You can do that.
00:15:17.040 And on top of that, if you want to get more content on this, on the specific topics of
00:15:20.980 negotiation, I did another video titled 14 Common Negotiation Mistakes.
00:15:27.160 If you've never watched this video before, click over to watch this.
00:15:30.120 If you want to learn about my PBD sales system to purchase, go click on the link below in the
00:15:34.380 description, in the description below and you'll find it.
00:15:38.080 And if you've not subscribed to this channel, please do so.
00:15:40.700 Thanks for watching everybody.
00:15:42.080 Good luck on your next high stakes meeting.