Valuetainment - September 28, 2021


20 Rules For Young Men


Episode Stats


Length

19 minutes

Words per minute

243.57225

Word count

4,702

Sentence count

1

Harmful content

Misogyny

5

sentences flagged

Toxicity

6

sentences flagged

Hate speech

4

sentences flagged


Summary

Summaries generated with gmurro/bart-large-finetuned-filtered-spotify-podcast-summ .

20 Rules of what it is to be a young man in today s times. 20 Rules of Being a Young Man in today's times. 20 Rules Of Being A Young Man: 1. Know the difference between lust and love. 2. Don't fall in love quick. 3. It's okay to go to movies by yourself. 4. Never get together with a friend's ex. 5. Never date a friend s ex. 6. Never go back to your ex. 7. Never ever get back with your friends ex. 8. Don t date your ex's ex's girlfriend. 9. Never be in a relationship with your ex s girlfriend. 10. Never have sex with someone you're dating. 11. Never take care of yourself in the bedroom. 12. Take care of your body odor. 13. Never let your ex go out with another woman. 14. Never share your ex with another girl. 15. Never trust a girl you are dating. 16. Never allow your ex to come back to you.

Transcript

Transcript generated with Whisper (turbo).
Misogyny classifications generated with MilaNLProc/bert-base-uncased-ear-misogyny .
Toxicity classifications generated with s-nlp/roberta_toxicity_classifier .
Hate speech classifications generated with facebook/roberta-hate-speech-dynabench-r4-target .
00:00:00.000 So this got to be a very weird time to be a young man because if you watch tv they
00:00:03.460 present a young man as a silly funny everybody makes fun of them weeks they're like maybe that's
00:00:08.060 how i'm supposed to be as a young man so that's how i'm going to get the attention because that's
00:00:11.220 who the hero is on tv and then you listen to music it's a complete different portrayal of
00:00:15.560 what it is to be young man to be cool so what is the right of being a young man i'm going to give
00:00:19.260 you today 20 rules of what it is to be a young man in today's times so if today's episode gives
00:00:29.340 you good perspective give it a thumbs up and subscribe to the channel stick around till
00:00:32.380 the very and i get a surprise for you so let's get right into it point number one know the difference
00:00:35.800 between lust and love there's a big difference between love and lust when you're young you tend
00:00:40.040 to fall in love quick and whenever you fall in love you lose your emotions you lose your mind you
00:00:45.580 don't really know what you're doing but it's just maybe somebody you dated with her sex was great 0.52
00:00:50.080 just maybe somebody you dated with there's a great connection in the bedroom or whatever it may be you
00:00:54.340 have a certain level of connection together right and that may confuse you on this may be the person
00:01:00.120 that i ought to be with for the rest of my life but marriage love long-term relationship is a very
00:01:05.400 big difference between a great good time you had with somebody i had relationships in the past where
00:01:10.240 i was confused i thought this is it but it was just great one aspect of the life and then eventually
00:01:15.520 later on you start taking your time and you say wait a minute i'm just having a good time with this
00:01:18.860 person this is not somebody i'm gonna end up with but for current time i'm having a good time
00:01:22.980 great so you have to differentiate between those too many young men make a mistake in that area number
00:01:27.340 two it's okay to go to movies by yourself i like to go to movies by myself because it allows me to
00:01:32.500 think it's a form of me almost meditating it's a form of me being by myself thinking about my own
00:01:38.980 thoughts what i'm doing next for you may not be meditating for you may be a different thing that
00:01:42.720 you're doing yoga whatever it is but in any way you can figure out a way to get away from the noise
00:01:47.560 you're by yourself where you can kind of think about what's going on with life it's a very good thing for
00:01:52.140 young men to do too often it's always around people you kind of need a little bit of your
00:01:56.440 own time to be thinking about your future number three hygiene is more important than you think 1.00
00:02:01.040 cologne alone cannot make up for bad body odor so whether it's when you're younger you're like i'm
00:02:07.720 just working out it's not a big deal you got the sweat you know on your shirts and all this other
00:02:11.720 stuff and you're not really thinking about it yeah you brush your teeth but it's like a 20 second
00:02:15.400 brushing your teeth you know yeah you kind of shave but you don't really you're not that much into it
00:02:19.480 yeah you kind of wash your body but it's like a two minute shower you got to kind of take that part
00:02:23.420 very seriously and i'm talking all aspects of it washing shaving odor you know having the right
00:02:29.120 you know deodorant to use all of that package comes together there's many content and great channels to
00:02:35.080 teach you on how to do this on the hygiene side but never underestimate the value of hygiene because
00:02:40.340 when somebody sees you and you're presentable you smell good you look good in every possible way you
00:02:46.120 give them the presentation that i take care of myself that says a lot about your character number
00:02:50.640 four never ever and i mean never ever get together with a friend's ex never do this if your friend
00:02:58.560 is dating a girl mary they break up but mary calls you don't ever go get together with mary i've seen this
00:03:08.140 happen so many times and ruin so many different friendships and in our circle if anybody ever did this
00:03:15.480 one you were either out of the circle or you're going to have a problem with me because that's
00:03:19.840 not something that we do in our circle if if someone like i remember one time we went to a club
00:03:23.600 and one of our old friends who was in the circle is with one of my best friend's girlfriend and i'm
00:03:31.140 like dude what are you doing it's like oh well she didn't want to be with them so she wanted to be
00:03:34.260 with me so do that there's like millions of people in la you choose this what does it matter with you
00:03:38.100 that's not what you do there there was a friction there no one in the group ever trusted him
00:03:42.240 ever again because of that specific reason everybody always kept their girl away from him
00:03:47.100 and eventually he had to go find a different crew and when he wanted to come back people just wouldn't
00:03:51.080 trust him so basic rule there's millions of other girls out there don't go date or hook up with a 1.00
00:03:56.160 friend's ex just because they call you and they say when we would go have coffee together we'd go to
00:04:00.920 the club i always watched you because i always wanted to be with you if your friendship matters that
00:04:05.420 much don't cross that line five stay informed on what's going on don't be a sheep have your own 0.84
00:04:09.840 opinion there's certain certain things about when i talk to somebody who's 20 years old or 22 years old
00:04:14.560 and you talk to them and they say well i know this is what's being said here but i wonder what's going
00:04:18.400 on really over here because i read this book and they told me that i'm like wow a 21 year old with an
00:04:23.120 opinion like that good for you so be informed follow what's going on don't be a sheep have your own
00:04:29.020 opinions about it and say it in a way that doesn't offend anybody number six have a sense of humor
00:04:33.700 but don't joke about your dreams and goals so you want to tell a joke great if people don't laugh at
00:04:39.700 your jokes you're probably not good at telling jokes so go learn how to tell a good joke because
00:04:42.720 it's good to have a sense of humor break the ice but never joke about your goals yeah you know one
00:04:47.340 day i'm gonna end up being an actor we know that's never gonna happen yeah that's not funny don't do
00:04:51.280 that it's your dreams it's your goals you don't need to joke about your dreams and goals if you're
00:04:55.220 serious about your dreams and goals don't let anybody around you joke about your dreams and goals
00:04:59.020 because that's your goals i remember one time i'm 24 years 23 years old my first five business
00:05:06.200 ventures fail and we're out with a few friends and this one guy i'll never forget him one guy
00:05:12.400 starts joking about hey we thought you were going to be this and we thought you were going to be that
00:05:16.060 and he was joking and i look at him i felt so uncomfortable because at 23 i had failed multiple
00:05:22.500 times in businesses and i just stopped him right there i said listen i'm sorry is this a joke to you
00:05:27.160 you said you want to be a lawyer yes do i laugh about you being a lawyer no so don't laugh about me
00:05:31.120 being a business owner and i said well i'm just kidding with you i said don't kid about my dreams
00:05:35.100 and in that moment i felt listen i'm serious about what i want to do with my life and everybody else
00:05:42.040 had to feel it fast forward 19 years later look where we are today so have a sense of humor joke
00:05:47.540 around but not about your dreams and goals next study the types of people who upset you and why so
00:05:52.460 for the longest time i would say well i keep dating the same kind of girl why i didn't know until
00:05:57.600 eventually i started i'm like okay now it makes sense why i'm dating this girl and i'm like i'm
00:06:01.280 always having conflicts with these types of personalities why and i'm like oh i totally got
00:06:06.840 it this person didn't do anything wrong this person reminds you of xyz it's not their fault next time
00:06:12.380 this happens be aware that this is the reason why you don't get along with this person but then there
00:06:16.820 were certain things that when i came across somebody i didn't like him and i studied why i didn't like
00:06:22.780 him it was valid because they were manipulators because they were divisive because they were the kind of
00:06:26.920 people that would tell you good things in front of you and the moment you turned around and then
00:06:30.240 five other people said you know what he really said about you and like one person didn't say two
00:06:33.480 didn't say and you saw how he would talk trash about everybody in his family friends peers in front
00:06:39.420 of you if somebody does that to you guess who's next you're next so study why you get along with
00:06:45.520 certain people and why you don't some of it has to do with your flaws some of it is for valid reason
00:06:49.880 but it's not all the same you can't say well because that person's a bad person nope that's an alibi
00:06:54.040 you're using to make yourself feel better about yourself study why that happens with you next
00:06:58.440 stand up to bullies you'll only have to do it once this is not something that
00:07:02.160 you're going to have to do 50 times you're not going to get into a thousand fights you're not
00:07:05.500 going to get into 50 fights but if bullies always bully and you don't do anything about it you're
00:07:09.360 probably going to get into a lot of fights and it's not really fights it's just people bullying you
00:07:12.480 until one time you stand up to a bully and then you have a reputation not as a tough guy as somebody
00:07:18.860 that doesn't back down but you only got to do it once next don't bully people weaker than you
00:07:23.960 sometimes when you become stronger let's say you have more power more money more influence you lift
00:07:30.700 more weights whatever it is you're out of you're dating better you know you're doing you're the guy
00:07:34.340 or you're you know the one with the influence don't don't impose and bully other guys that are
00:07:40.000 weaker than you just because you're making yourself feel better it's a very weak quality it shows there's
00:07:44.400 deeper insecurities there there's no need to do that if you are the person that's doing well
00:07:47.960 be confident stand up don't let other people poke at you but at the same time don't impose your success
00:07:53.820 and all that stuff on other people it's not a good move it shows insecurities next learn how to tell
00:07:59.100 stories in the world of business and life many times if you want to make your point the best way to
00:08:03.760 make a good point is by telling stories learn how to tell a good story there's many books you can read
00:08:08.040 about how to tell a good story on the format of it but learn how to tell good stories matter of fact i got a
00:08:11.880 video i did on how to tell good stories if you've never seen it uh the link is over here as well
00:08:15.700 and we're going to put the link below as well let's continue number 11 don't lean on porn to get better
00:08:20.740 in bed read study and i'm not trying to be funny with you i know some people will say well pat i'm
00:08:25.700 visual i'm a visual type of person that's why i watch porn because i learn how to get better in bed
00:08:30.640 by watching a lot of porn i totally get it i was in the army and you know on our floor second floor
00:08:35.000 if i came back to the barracks at seven o'clock all i heard on blast is uh all i heard on blast
00:08:42.400 sergeant on this side that guy's bracken he's got the best vhs this guy's bracken there's 10 guys in
00:08:47.320 the room watching this was a military thing everybody was doing it and listen i get it if 0.91
00:08:51.760 you're going through it but the way sex is done in porn many times is not the best way to please and 0.99
00:08:58.920 you kind of look like a fool when you try to test those things out in the bedroom versus i understand 0.98
00:09:04.120 exploring but there's also things you can read about to find out what areas work better than other 0.97
00:09:09.400 areas there's great content great books on that take the time you don't need to advertise on 10
00:09:13.840 best books on how to get better in bed but go there's plenty of content out there on how to learn
00:09:18.300 how to do that don't let porn be your teacher let books be your teacher on how to actually get good in
00:09:23.920 that area next okay number 12 you never marry a girl you marry the family so if you're dating a girl
00:09:29.440 and you don't get along with the family but you like the girl you love the girl but the family's a mess
00:09:33.080 you have to make sure that part's also right because the moment you guys have kids together
00:09:38.160 or other issues that come up she's going to call the family and if you don't get along with the
00:09:41.760 family the family's not going to back you up and then there's going to be a separation constant my
00:09:44.920 parents got two divorces in 20 years neither family liked each other my mom's family didn't like my
00:09:49.140 dad's family my dad's family didn't like my mom's family they thought it was going to work out
00:09:52.120 didn't work out so always remember if you're dating a girl and if it's somebody you want to be with long
00:09:55.980 term make sure you kind of like the family as well and if you maybe you don't like the family because
00:10:00.620 they don't know yet or maybe you don't like them because you don't know them yet create that
00:10:04.420 opportunity to get to know each other but if there's not a connection there you're probably
00:10:08.720 going to end up having problems with these guys for a long time so be patient with it stay strong
00:10:12.560 don't give up but strive to find out where to learn more about the family and if it doesn't work
00:10:17.760 yet it's going to be problems in the future number 13 don't complain you seem helpless 80% of people
00:10:23.140 quite frankly don't care you have problems 20% of people are kind of glad you do have problems you
00:10:27.300 have friends and family that are glad that you have problems when you're always complaining it's
00:10:30.940 an unattractive quality because what you're telling the world is i'm helpless i'm helpless i don't know
00:10:37.200 how to help myself please oh my gosh what do i do don't complain constantly it's a weak move you seem
00:10:43.020 helpless it doesn't mean you don't talk to your peers and say i'm dealing with something i'm struggling
00:10:46.620 with something i'm not telling you to internalize it and not be vulnerable and talk to your peers but if
00:10:51.560 you're always complaining around other people it's a very very weak move on your end number 14 be
00:10:56.580 impressed by the right things things that matter a lot of times people will be impressed by the
00:11:01.960 wrong things oh this guy's got nice jewelry this guy's got nice this this guy's got nice cars this
00:11:07.560 guy's got nice that don't get me wrong i like the ferrari i like the lambo the rolls royce i like i've
00:11:12.020 had all those exotics i like all of those things but what impressed me is wow this guy's had a hundred
00:11:19.280 people that have been working with him for 50 years why what what does that say about this guy's
00:11:24.180 character what do you do to keep people that long wow this guy's kids love him and want to be around
00:11:29.920 him all the time what is he doing wow look at this person he's so disciplined the way he teaches
00:11:34.500 talks to waiters and waitresses i like to be impressed by those things the other stuff is
00:11:40.480 ancillary stuff that you'll get if you become successful when you become impressed by that you
00:11:44.500 also become a man of character and eventually that's going to serve you in many different aspects
00:11:48.380 of life number 15 when coming across a successful person don't talk too much ask don't talk too much
00:11:54.200 you know a lot of times like well let me tell you oh my gosh you're my hero me oh my oh you won't
00:11:58.320 even know understand very simple hey love your story very impressed what you've done i appreciate you
00:12:03.260 you mind if i ask you a couple questions yeah when you were my age what was the biggest struggle you had
00:12:08.020 ask questions because that person's gonna walk away saying wow that guy's that guy's very inquisitive
00:12:15.240 that guy's asking questions who is that guy i think that guy's going places versus the other
00:12:18.600 guys that are just talking talking talking talking talking the person that asked the question the
00:12:22.340 other person walks away saying i'm impressed by that person number 16 have a memorable style i'm
00:12:27.000 not telling you wear a suit but if that's your style wear it yeah i'm not telling you to wear white
00:12:31.220 shirts or whatever but have a unique style about yourself if it's a hat wear that hat if it's certain
00:12:36.000 glasses wear it if you have a certain shoe or certain way you do think have a memorable style because
00:12:41.240 when people see you they're gonna say man every time i see that guy that guy's got style
00:12:44.740 your style figure out what your style is and make it memorable next 17 don't feel guilty
00:12:50.180 for being ambitious i remember i would talk about my dreams and some people like man you know what
00:12:56.280 whatever i mean who cares about this and who cares about this i'm like yeah you're right you know it's
00:13:00.700 right i'm like what am i doing no no no i'm ambitious this is who i am i'm wired this way i'm not
00:13:06.800 going to apologize for this be proud of your ambitious don't apologize if you have big ambitions in
00:13:12.160 life number 18 be mentally and emotionally ready for losing loved ones this is a tough one my dad
00:13:16.720 prepared me for this at six years old when he we went for a walk around we were getting bombed all
00:13:21.740 the time so he kind of wanted to prepare me because where he was working was getting bombed pretty bad
00:13:25.240 and he said you know one day i'm gonna die i said why what do you mean one day you're gonna die i'm six 0.50
00:13:30.140 years old think about this he said one day i'm gonna die i said dad i don't want to talk about this he
00:13:35.120 says one day i'm gonna die and you have to be happy about it i said i'm not gonna be happy about it
00:13:39.280 you're my best friend what do you mean you're gonna die he says no one day i'm gonna die and
00:13:42.340 you have to know at least you had those amount of years with me so you have to be grateful i said
00:13:45.640 you mean to tell me if your mom i know you love your mom your mom dies you're gonna be happy he
00:13:49.340 says i'm absolutely gonna be happy i said i don't believe you fast forward my his mom died at 72
00:13:54.120 years old and i'm like a hawk watching him right this was uh in 2000 and uh uh 2000 maybe 1999 or 2000
00:14:03.640 when she passed away so 11 years ago and i was my late 20s and i watch him late 20s early 30s and i watch
00:14:08.720 him and i see i'm seeing what this guy's gonna do uh not late 20s i'm in my early 20s and i'm
00:14:14.120 watching him i'm like let's see what happens he goes mom's dying he's got tears coming down but he's
00:14:19.140 got a smile on his face so why are you smiling he says do you realize i had a mom with me for
00:14:24.660 freaking 60 something years i'm the luckiest man alive and he was telling all these happy stories
00:14:30.140 about his mom you have to mentally and emotionally be ready that you're gonna lose loved ones you're in
00:14:34.900 your 20s maybe not in your 20s but it's gonna happen but the more mentally and emotionally you're
00:14:39.180 ready for it it will not destroy you when it happens not you will not be hurt of course you're
00:14:44.180 gonna be hurt these are loved ones but life's gonna suck at times and it's gonna suck in a major way
00:14:49.620 and if you're not mentally and emotionally prepared and spiritually prepared for it
00:14:53.260 sometimes that phase of sucking rather than lasting for a week a month or two months or three months
00:14:58.700 sometimes it lasts a year two years three years and it destroys
00:15:01.400 a great young man's life with a big potential so i know it's not the most exciting topic to talk
00:15:07.520 about but i'm trying to mentally and emotionally get you ready to be thinking about some of those
00:15:10.680 thoughts so let's continue next number 19 always have some cash condoms and a power bank with you 0.98
00:15:15.720 uh cash because things are going to come up uh condoms because you don't ever want to make a
00:15:20.760 mistake and next you know you're looking back saying why did i do that and power bank because if
00:15:24.880 something happens to you car breaks down something you're stuck in the middle of nowhere you don't know
00:15:29.520 how to you know charge your battery it's always good to have a power bank because either you or
00:15:32.920 somebody else probably going to need it number 20 be aware of uh your level of sensitivities and here
00:15:37.360 let me explain to what i mean by this last 20 years i started off as a 22 year old and i worked my
00:15:42.600 way up 21 22 year old and i worked my way up to where i'm at right now i watched a lot of my young
00:15:47.760 friends who were also like me growing up 22 year old 23 year old men who were sensitive if somebody
00:15:54.980 challenged him too much who who did not control their sensitivities and i would watch my sensitivity
00:16:00.480 i did not like what that guy said i want to punch him like i would literally i'm going to punch him 0.99
00:16:04.820 in the face 22 year old kid with a lot of temper just got out of the military like wait wait wait 0.99
00:16:08.240 what what what did he poke that bothered you what did he poke that it bothered you right so slowly i'm
00:16:15.280 like man that area keeps hurting if somebody challenges you know why is that okay why don't we do
00:16:19.980 something about it but then i watched some of my friends like i cannot believe that happened
00:16:23.740 every single time the smallest crisis would happen flight flight flight flight this relationship
00:16:31.540 didn't work out flight this relation flight this job didn't work out flight every single time
00:16:37.020 here's what i want to prepare you for any relationship any friendship any business any career you take
00:16:42.120 there's going to be multiple moments of friction if every time friction happens you run you can do that
00:16:48.540 for the rest of your life it's not the friction's fault it's the way of handling the friction's fault
00:16:53.520 you got to be aware of what offended you how sensitive you are and rather than just i can't
00:16:58.580 deal with this anymore and you run away like a little kid no if you want to be a grown man you
00:17:03.740 got to sit there and say listen i knew what happened the other day bothers me i want to improve
00:17:07.080 but there are certain things that made me feel a little bit uncomfortable i want to talk to you about
00:17:10.620 it i'm not saying i'm leaving all i'm saying is can we figure out a way to improve this situation
00:17:14.440 here and in that method progress is made freezing not saying anything nothing happens flight so your
00:17:21.160 rest of your life you're going to run away from prompts but if you're fighting you say can we
00:17:24.160 address this issue people are going to respect you more and eventually you'll end up being a leader
00:17:27.480 but that level of sensitivity with this generation people are too quick to just run away from the
00:17:32.580 problem and challenge they face and what happens is their friends do the same exact thing it's a weak
00:17:36.780 move don't be that person 21 and i got four bonuses for you regardless of what you get paid an hour
00:17:41.720 four bucks an hour which they don't do anymore 720 in america 10 bucks an hour 15 bucks an hour 20
00:17:47.080 bucks i don't care when i worked at burger king i worked my tail off when i worked at valley's i
00:17:54.020 worked my tail off when i was in the army i worked my tail i don't care what you paid me i worked my
00:17:59.600 tail off and that reputation was out there people would say dude i don't care what you pay this guy 0.88
00:18:05.400 this guy's gonna work he's gonna work his ass up he's gonna have a great attitude so because i worked 0.88
00:18:10.100 my tail off because i had a great attitude opportunities would constantly come my way we
00:18:13.920 have a promotion for you we have a promotion for you we have a promotion for you we have a sale for
00:18:18.280 you this client wants to talk to you the way you handled that client was so impressive i got another
00:18:21.280 client for you so it doesn't matter what you're getting paid don't pay attention to what you're
00:18:25.940 getting paid pay attention to your effort pay attention to your attitude you will be amazed by the
00:18:30.420 amount of opportunities that have come your way so that's 21 rules for you but i got a four additional
00:18:34.800 bonus that you have to text the word young men m-e-n young men to 310-340-1132 one more time
00:18:41.720 310-340-1132 or if you're international click on a link below subscribe to our newsletter we'll send
00:18:48.040 these 21 rules plus the four additional bonus and on top of that i got two other things for you one is
00:18:53.040 a video i did uh i don't know six years ago who to marry how to marry if that's the face of your life
00:18:56.720 you're in click over to watch that video and outside of that the book that i think would help a lot
00:19:01.080 of young men out it's a book i wrote a year ago called your next five moves if you've not read the
00:19:06.080 book or listen to the audio click over here to go read the book as well as the audio it's going to
00:19:11.140 clarify for you on what your next 5 10 15 moves out of you if you got a lot of value give us a thumbs
00:19:16.160 up and subscribe to the channel take care everybody bye