In this episode of ITM, Patrick talks about 32 difficult personalities to work with and how to deal with them. He also talks about the benefits of working with them and how they can help you grow in your business.
00:00:00.38030 seconds. One time for the underdog. Ignition sequence start. Let me see you put them up. Reach the sky, touch the stars up above. Cause it's one time for the underdog. One time for the underdog.
00:00:17.280I'm Patrick Bedeb, your host of ITM, and today I'm going to talk to you about 32 difficult personalities to work with.
00:00:22.680Here's the part you got to realize. You heard what I said when I said everybody is difficult to somebody, right?
00:00:27.480But there is good difficult, there is bad difficult. You'll see what I mean by them.
00:00:31.660Some of them I'm going to explain to you and some of these are pertaining to me as well.
00:00:34.300So as we're watching this, the part I don't want you to do, I don't want you to just watch this and say,
00:00:38.820Oh, that's how she is. Oh, that's how my mom is. Oh, that's how my dad is. Oh, that's how this person is.
00:00:43.340Because everybody, all the people on the outside, they ain't changing.
00:00:46.460You got to look for the ones that's you and say, what do I need to do to fix this part about me
00:00:50.840that is not a good, difficult personality, that hopefully will help you do better with the people that you're dealing with.
00:00:56.620So let me get right into it. Mario and I sat down, and by the way, every one of these personalities,
00:01:01.060there's a name right next to it. Some of them are my name, some of them are other people's names,
00:01:05.440some of them is Mario's name, believe it or not.
00:01:07.400But it's everybody that we know that we kind of put it up, then all of a sudden categories came out.
00:01:10.940Number one, attitude. I mean, I've dealt with a lot of difficult people, but the simplest one is
00:01:14.720somebody who's got a pessimistic, negative attitude that's always complaining,
00:01:20.180and it's a downer all the time. Very difficult personality to be around.
00:01:24.640Number two, passive. You'll be in a meeting, and you're expecting people to participate and give
00:01:29.040their ideas. They don't say anything. They're passive. Somebody's pushing them, and they don't
00:01:33.460voice their opinions. They're passive. Somebody is challenging them. They don't say anything.
00:01:37.580They're passive. That becomes difficult because the value, everybody has some kind of a value
00:01:41.700to bring in a meeting. We're not able to get the value out of that person because they're being
00:01:45.580passive. So if somebody that's passive, you're thinking to yourself, I'm kind of a passive personality.
00:01:49.600By the way, most of you watching are probably going to have this being as one of them, majority,
00:01:53.820a lot of people. You've got to kind of get yourself out there because if you're sitting
00:01:57.520in a meeting, you don't voice your opinion, nobody sees you as a potential leader to come
00:02:01.420up. Someone's got to know what is on your mind. So you've got to come prepared and say,
00:02:05.640here's what I think we need to do to improve this department, improve this business, improve
00:02:09.260this company, improve this division, whatever it is it is. So being passive sometimes is one
00:02:14.440fastest way to not get promoted or grow in your business. Number three, too emotional. We've had people in the past
00:02:19.360before. When I say too emotional, we had somebody that we fired and we were talking about a really
00:02:24.420nice guy, just a sweetheart of a guy, but too often things would happen. He would just start crying. It
00:02:29.240was way too much where it was every single time something happened. It was way too much. I've dealt
00:02:33.920with these types of personalities probably 20, 30, 40 times in my career where it was way too emotional.
00:02:39.620And when that happens, here's what takes place. When somebody immediately starts crying,
00:02:43.300the opposition is afraid of giving you real counsel and feedback because they're thinking
00:02:48.760to themselves, if I say it, there's going to be more crying. And people don't like to be around
00:02:52.260other people that constantly cry in the first place because it's not a habit of a leader. So
00:02:56.820sometimes being too emotional, it's very difficult to work with somebody like that. So the solution
00:03:00.620typically for a company becomes, we just have to replace them and get them to another place.
00:03:04.440If that's you, keep in mind, in a business environment, in an environment that's growing,
00:03:09.260being too emotional doesn't serve you at all. Next, number four, outdo you. You ever seen a movie,
00:03:14.240Boogie Nights, right? Boogie Nights is what it's called. And there was a scene, so funny. We had
00:03:19.980a guy named Paddock in the army. He says, Pad, this movie came out. We got to watch this movie. So
00:03:24.920all the guys, we have no clue what the movie is. 30 of us, we sit there and we buy this movie from
00:03:29.200PX, which is Army's Walmart. And we put it and we watch. We're like, what are we watching over here?
00:03:33.820It's the story of a porn star. I said, but it's Mark Wahlberg. It's insane. You know, it's great. And all the
00:03:38.820stuff that he's doing. And there's a scene where the guy says, so what do you bench? He says, I
00:03:44.220bench 185. He says, what do you bench? I bench 190. Oh, okay. That's cool. Hey, so how high do you
00:03:50.200jump? You know, I jump this much. What do you curl? I curl this. What do you, you know, squat? I squat
00:03:56.440225, squat 230. You ever met people like that? They're annoying, aren't they? It's always like they
00:04:00.980got to outdo you. But although it's negative, let me tell you the positive side of it. They're
00:04:05.240competitive. You know what I'm saying? They're always like, you tell a story. I remember,
00:04:08.800one time I was going in and here's what happened. The car was going so fast. Oh my gosh, let
00:04:12.580me tell you what happened with me. So it's semi-annoying, but if it's competitive in
00:04:16.560all the other areas and they perform, I'm okay with it. I can deal with that as long
00:04:20.300as that competitiveness bleeds into performance as well. But there's a part of it that can
00:04:24.820be difficult at times. Number five, aggressive. Aggressive is somebody that wants to come in,
00:04:28.940take charge. Here's what we're doing. This is what we're doing next. Here's what we're
00:04:32.140going. People, somebody that wants to take charge. That could be positive, but that can also
00:04:36.300allow other people to not really voice their opinions at times. So it can be negative and
00:04:40.200positive. So number six, too salesy. Somebody who's always selling. I'm talking everything
00:04:46.620to them as sales. By the way, I think everything in life is sales. But there's everything in
00:04:51.140life as sales, then there's saying it to everybody 24-7. I've had guys in my life that, oh, he's
00:04:57.780got my money. I've got to go get this guy. That guy's got this. Everything is about that
00:05:01.800all the time. It's a little too much. It's a little too much. Now, let me give you the
00:05:06.780other side. Remember how I said positive, negative? That can help in the world of sales. But not
00:05:11.580necessarily if you're trying to run a big business and allowing to have other talent to come to
00:05:15.900you. If it's way too salesy, sometimes people don't trust that personality too often. So
00:05:20.320it could help in a sales business when you're solo by yourself. But to build a massive empire,
00:05:24.500maybe it's going to hurt you a little bit. Number seven, fake. People who are fake. We've done
00:05:28.100business with a lot of fake people. That's just very easy. They look at you in your face.
00:05:32.160And they tell you everything they want. You want to hear from them. And then all of a sudden,
00:05:34.780they're a whole different person an hour later, two hours later, the next day. And they're like,
00:05:38.100wait a minute, what happened? Didn't we just have a meeting? And they time it. And they time when
00:05:42.320they want to tell you this. It's like, you know, kids, when they know when to ask you for, you know,
00:05:46.240money and that, can I get this? And they time it like, when you're happy, let me go ask them.
00:05:50.140There's a little bit of fakeness there, but it's very difficult to do business with fake people because
00:05:54.340you have no idea who's going to show up the next day. Eight, everything is a joke. Now, let me tell you about
00:05:58.160everything is a joke. This is fine if I'm going to a bar with you and we're hanging out and you
00:06:02.980make me laugh for five hours straight. But there's a different story with everything is a joke.
00:06:08.520Meaning, let me explain to you what I mean by this. I work with a guy in our office.
00:06:12.820I can't think of a single time. Mario reminded me of this. I can't think of a single time that
00:06:17.360he wouldn't do a Borat sign. It was like, well, what was the lines? Mario was what?
00:06:21.240I like. I like. I like. And then what was the other one? Very nice. Very nice. How much?
00:06:25.820Every single time. So eventually no one took that seriously. Nobody takes it seriously if you're
00:06:31.660constantly joking around. Because if you're constantly joking around, it's being overcompensated
00:06:37.000for something that's lacking here. And humor is great to break the ice, but 24-7, there's some
00:06:43.960missing there. So humor is fine, but not overly because it kind of takes away from serious sense
00:06:48.800of getting a job done as well. And number nine is overpower opposite sex. I've dealt with women
00:06:54.180who enjoy to overpower men, and I've dealt with men who enjoy to overpower women. I've dealt with both.
00:07:01.840Neither is effective, just so you know. Now, it is effective if you just want to attract women,
00:07:07.820and you are a woman. And it is effective if you're a man, and you just want to attract
00:07:13.260other men. That can be effective. But it's not effective if you're trying to build a business
00:07:17.720of husbands, wives, women, men, single, married, it doesn't matter. Everything, you've got to be
00:07:24.420able to learn how to deal with everybody. But I've dealt with some people that they just want to
00:07:28.240control the opposite sex 24-7. Ten, condescending. I've dealt with a guy like this in the past before,
00:07:34.540and we have some of this at the home office as well. Sometimes as leaders, you know, we can be
00:07:37.960condescending ourselves, and we don't even know it, and you have to catch yourself. It happens a lot.
00:07:41.960Now, sometimes in certain environments, it's a lot like, I was in the military before, and
00:07:45.840sports, and it's constant shots, and sarcasm, and condescending, and comments, and remarks. So,
00:07:52.940there were people in the military, I remember vividly, there were people in the military who
00:07:57.240couldn't handle it, who were ETS'd early, less than an honorable, because they couldn't handle them.
00:08:01.980They wanted to get out because it was way too much of that. But the military is 24-7. I've heard kids
00:08:06.760who play on sports teams who cannot handle when their coach or other players are like that.
00:08:11.920And so, oh, that was a little bit too much for me. But in the sports world environment,
00:08:15.640sometimes it gets very competitive, and the smack talking takes place. I mean, if you look at
00:08:19.440basketball, let me tell you, Draymond Green probably does this all the time, and he gets under other
00:08:24.520people's skin. You know who else? I can name you 20, 30, 40 people in the world of sports who do this.
00:08:30.020Is that a positive? Is that a negative? It can be a positive, and it can be a negative. Very simple.
00:08:35.940That could work for you in a very competitive environment. It can hurt you because you're
00:08:39.920going to lose some of the people that they're developing process of becoming competitive or
00:08:43.800coming up, maybe a slower pace, so you will lose them, where another environment of the
00:08:48.920condescending was lower, though people will stick around. So, it's all about who you want to keep in
00:08:51.780the environment that you're building right now. Number 11, know it all. Uncoachable. They know
00:08:55.760everything. They simply know everything. You cannot teach them anything. They will
00:08:59.800always brag about their degree or how smart they are. They will always remind you that
00:09:03.960they're smarter than you. By the way, I'm also good in math. I'm also smart. I'm also
00:09:07.560this. You're not the only person. It's know-it-all. I know what I'm doing. You can't
00:09:11.440give any direction to them. So now, is that a good or a bad? That can be a good, and that
00:09:16.300can be a bad. What do I mean by that? I don't mind a person that's uncoachable to
00:09:20.640another person that's a small thinker. What do I mean by this? Let me explain to you. Say I'm raised by
00:09:24.400parents who are small thinkers, and they keep telling me to go take the safe route.
00:09:28.340And I'm saying, no, I don't want to listen to it. I don't want to do that. Yeah, but
00:09:31.780you got to go and get a degree, but I'm not built to go to school. I'm telling you, I
00:09:35.460don't want to do anything to do with school, but you got to go to college. I don't
00:09:38.800want to go to college. That uncoachability can be fine if the kid knows exactly what
00:09:44.760he or she wants, and they're not lazy. Now, for some of you that say, I relate to this, Pat.
00:09:48.860That's exactly who I am. But you play video games 24-7, and you're lazy, and you put on a lot of weight.
00:09:53.820At 18 years old, I'm not talking about you because you're lazy, period. I'm talking about
00:09:58.500the kid that at 14 years old has already started selling. At 12 years that he was selling stuff
00:10:03.200at a lemonade stand, he washes cars, he goes around cleaning stuff. The kid works hard all
00:10:08.280the time, makes money on Saturdays and Sundays. If this kid wants to tell his parents, I want
00:10:13.080to be an entrepreneur, that may be a good sign of uncoachability, right? So there is good,
00:10:17.100there is bad. It's not all bad in that area. Number 12, uncommitted. Afraid to commit.
00:10:21.060There's always an out. I've dealt with people like this for many, many years. Let me tell
00:10:26.060you how I handle these uncommitted people. It was always about trying to convert them,
00:10:30.740right? But I'm telling you, it's good. But you got to get it. Can you imagine if you
00:10:34.740do it? Constantly. Eventually, I realized this is how they are in their personal lives.
00:10:40.660This is how they are in their business lives. This is how they are with their friends, with
00:10:43.840their girlfriends, with their wives, with their husbands, with everybody. They don't commit.
00:10:48.260So which means what? There's always an out. So no matter how much you pour into them,
00:10:52.240and the more you pour into them, the more they think you need them, the more they try
00:10:56.380to abuse you. Does that make sense? So you have to be very neutral with these personalities
00:11:00.380because they're frightened by committing, and there's always an out for them. So you have
00:11:05.820to be very nimble when you dance with these guys. Don't get too close. Don't get too emotional.
00:11:08.780Don't get too friendly with them because they're probably going to end up taking advantage of
00:11:11.740you and mess with your mind. Give a distance to them. Let them do what they want. If they
00:11:15.380don't want to commit, no problem. It's all good. Go out there and get it. Odds are they're probably
00:11:19.620not going to commit to anything that they don't want to commit to. Leave them alone. Give them
00:11:23.900direction. Create a condition for them to grow. If they want to do it, great. If they don't,
00:11:27.940they will move on and they'll do their own part. Number 13, enjoy rejecting everything. I've sat in
00:11:32.820boardrooms. No matter what I do, come up. No, no, no, no, no, no, no. By the way, nothing wrong with
00:11:40.380this. If it's no, no, no, no, because you're trying to stay with your money and you're not
00:11:44.920trying to say yes to everything. There's a part of it that's good to say no, but to always say no
00:11:50.280and reject every single idea 24-7, what that does is, yes, risk may be minimized, but there's a
00:11:58.000possibility of that upside opportunity that was coming your way that you're not going to get
00:12:01.800because you always say no, right? And sometimes somebody in a boardroom, an ideation type of an
00:12:06.220environment that's always rejecting every idea, they bring morale down. Morale comes down. So a
00:12:11.580lot of times you've got to take those guys out of the ideation room and when you're coming up with
00:12:16.180ideas, come up with people that are coming up with positive ideas, then when you need a devil's
00:12:20.440advocate, bring that person inside and say, tell us all the reasons why this is not going to work.
00:12:24.180Believe me, they're going to find all the reasons why that's not going to work. Sometimes you're going
00:12:28.560to have a lot of people that are going to give you reasons that it's going to work and you need to be
00:12:31.680able to hear somebody that's going to tell you the 20 reasons that it's not going to work. I have somebody at work
00:12:35.760we're here at the home office. Let me tell you what I do. Any positive ideas that comes up, it's
00:12:40.240automatic finding the negative in it every single time. So I've told Mario, until we have all the
00:12:44.840information, we don't need to let that loose to that person until we have figured out exactly what
00:12:50.160it is. Then we do and then let them come in and break the whole thing down and tell us what's going
00:12:54.700on with that place and then we move on. Okay, number 14, unclear. People who are unclear, they don't know
00:12:59.060what they want. You can't lead a person that's unclear. You can't do business with somebody that's
00:13:03.300unclear. You can't be in a relationship with somebody that's unclear. There's not a lot of
00:13:06.920things you can do with somebody that's unclear. Number 15, arrogant, arrogant, arrogant. This is
00:13:12.340somebody that thinks they're above everybody. You know how I said earlier, things are smarter than
00:13:16.300everybody. This is slightly different with arrogance because it's like a, it's an aura about
00:13:20.760them. There's this level of arrogance about them that makes it difficult for other people who want
00:13:25.240to collaborate. Number 16, character issues. Let me tell you what I mean by character issues. Stealing,
00:13:29.280cheating, lying, criminal activity, forgery, anything that they do that hurts the entire
00:13:37.680company, you cannot tolerate any of this stuff. You got to figure that out early because a lot
00:13:42.380of times, I've seen many big empires, many, many big empires fall because somebody tolerated another
00:13:47.940person's bad character and bad habit. It didn't show up in a year. It didn't show up in five years,
00:13:53.400but it did show up in 10 years. And when it did, the empire was bigger. So the fall was a bigger fall
00:13:59.240than a smaller fall. But I've seen this many, many times. You cannot compromise character issues
00:14:03.520within a company. Number 17, triangulate. Let me tell you what's triangulate. So for instance,
00:14:08.580imagine you're doing business with somebody and they want me to make something happen, right?
00:14:15.020They'll go to Mario. They'll go to Tom. They'll go to, let's just say, somebody else at the home office.
00:14:20.440They will pin the three together and they'll call me and they'll say, Pat said this, or hey, Mario
00:14:26.580said this, and they'll pin the three people together to get a decision done. And then we now have
00:14:31.880conflicts against each other because this person is triangulating, okay? We've had people like this
00:14:36.380in the past before, and the way you have to address it, the way I address it all the time, the guys at
00:14:40.400the home office know what I do. I call the individual, I say, listen, we are not fans of triangulating.
00:14:44.880As you're going through making decisions on things like this, here's what needs to take place.
00:14:49.400If it's a decision that involves three different departments, I want everybody to be involved in
00:14:53.600the communication before we decide what we're doing. And I'm the last person. And the last person
00:14:58.380that comes to me is, they come give me an update, then we get on a call, then we make a decision.
00:15:02.300But do not triangulate because you're pinning people against each other. And there are some people
00:15:06.520that do a lot of triangulating. It's not an effective method to bring people together in a work
00:15:11.240environment. Number 19, liar. I mean, that's pretty easy. I did a video once. Mario, what was that one
00:15:15.480video we did? Who should you trust in business? That's right. Who should you trust in business
00:15:19.580was an episode that we did. And I talked about different types of lying. And that gets a little
00:15:23.420bit more into detail if you do want to watch that. But, you know, it's difficult to deal with people
00:15:27.560that always lie or constantly lie. There's a different style of them. Some of them are petty
00:15:31.820and they're not that big of a deal. But some of them are very big. You got to know which level of
00:15:35.220lying it is. So if you want to find out what it is, go watch that episode. Number 20, people who hate losing.
00:15:39.300Let me explain to you what I mean by people who hate losing. This, I've dated girls who hated losing
00:15:44.840and I've done business with people who hate losing and this isn't difficult in a negative way if
00:15:51.740they're self-aware. Let me explain. Sometimes a person who hates losing so bad, right before in
00:15:58.760their mind they know they're about to lose, they don't even know they're doing it because they're
00:16:02.380not conscious of this. They start hurting other relationships to make the reasoning for losing
00:16:08.320not that big of a deal. I don't know if that made any sense. It's kind of like, you know,
00:16:11.520you already know you're about, like you know in football or basketball, you already know you're
00:16:15.840about to lose a game, then you do a flagrant foul. Not necessarily why you're doing a flagrant foul.
00:16:20.180You know that's because of frustration. You know you're about to lose. You're so upset that anybody
00:16:25.620who speaks to you during that moment, you're an absolute jerk to everybody. Now, is there a positive
00:16:32.700in that? Yes. I don't mind people who don't like to lose. I love people who hate to lose.
00:16:37.540But there's sore losers, and there's people who need to realize that when you lose, you've got
00:16:42.000to go shake hands. At the end of every baseball game, t-ball game, they teach them. You've got
00:16:44.760to go high-five the opponent. They do this in World Series. They do this in sports. And it sucks.
00:16:49.660Remember when Michael Jordan beat Isaiah Thomas and the Detroit Pistons? And Detroit Pistons
00:16:54.100walked off, and you see Isaiah Thomas walking like this right past the bench, and they didn't
00:16:58.580high-five? That's somebody who hates losing, but it's a sore loser. You lost. I remember one time,
00:17:03.460I'll never forget, one time I lost, and somebody brought me on stage, and they made me give the
00:17:07.140other person the trophy. This was in front of 600 people. I got up. I gave it to him.
00:17:13.040They were condescending. They took a lot of shots at me. I don't mind it, because I love
00:17:16.780that kind of stuff. And I gave a message from stage to him, and I said, you deserve it.
00:17:21.280You outworked me, but this will be the last time ever for the rest of your life you will
00:17:25.160ever beat me in this game, ever. It's game over from here on. But having said that, congratulations
00:17:30.840to you. Enjoy this victory. I went and sat down. Never, ever, ever did they ever get close,
00:17:36.640because I hate to lose. But I didn't mind the stage, because I had to address the issue that
00:17:40.880I didn't work hard. It's okay. So if you're watching this, that's a little bit of you,
00:17:44.640you got to adjust, because you're hurting some relationship, simply because you hate to lose,
00:17:47.900and you know you're about to lose, and you rub out the people the wrong way, and you become
00:17:50.880difficult. Next. 21. A true believer. Let me explain to you about true believer. Recently,
00:17:56.680I sat with Gloria Allred. Gloria Allred is responsible for, if you ever see her with sexual
00:18:03.540harassment lawsuits, she was there for Bill Cosby, she was there with Weinstein, she was
00:18:07.260there with a lot of different presidents, a lot of different people that had any kind
00:18:11.040of assault that they did to someone else. It's typically sexual harassment. Over a quarter
00:18:17.780of a billion dollars, this woman's won, in lawsuits, specifically around sexual harassment,
00:18:23.880right? Her and I are sitting down in her office, and I'm speaking to her, I kept telling her,
00:18:28.120you're a true believer. You're a true believer. You're a true believer. By the way, here's
00:18:31.980what happens with a true believer. You better believe there's a group that hates true believers
00:18:37.940because they're so difficult. You know why they're so difficult? Because they can't help
00:18:42.420themselves but keep talking about what they believe in. They cannot help themselves. It's
00:18:46.98024-7. And the only people that appreciate a true believer is another true believer at the same
00:18:54.940level as them in a complete different space. Make sense? True believers understand other true
00:19:00.440believers. That doesn't mean a true believer likes the other true believer. That doesn't mean Gloria
00:19:03.940and I agree on everything in life. You will see the interview. It's pretty controversial. We get at
00:19:09.240it pretty quickly. But I respect the hell out of somebody that's a true believer, that consistently,
00:19:13.620this woman for 50 years has been going around the same message over and over and over and over and
00:19:17.640over again. That's difficult. So in a world of a business, picture this. Say somebody in a business
00:19:22.900is a true believer, and everybody's kind of like a believer. And somebody's just there for money or
00:19:26.340their doubters, all this other stuff. This true believer is non-stop selling the vision, where we're
00:19:30.100going, where we're going, where we're going, where we're going. Some believers will become true
00:19:33.800believers. Some non-believers will become believers. But some doubters will stay doubters because like,
00:19:37.420listen, I don't even want to hear that stuff. That's okay. This is still a difficult person, but it's a
00:19:42.220positive difficult person. If what they believe in is a worthy, positive cause, this is a good thing.
00:19:49.640You want more true believers. There was a book called The True Believer. It's about 180 pages.
00:19:54.200Technical book. Great book to read. It talks about what it is to be a true believer. Number 22, selfish.
00:19:59.500Let me explain to you what I mean by selfish. I have a name right next to selfish. Okay? I have a name
00:20:04.300right next to selfish. And here's what selfish is. There's good selfish. There's bad selfish. Let me
00:20:10.140explain to you what both of them are. What's a good selfish? Good selfish is somebody that
00:20:13.380wants to win so bad that they pull everybody else above with them to also win. But they're wanting
00:20:19.800to win so flipping bad that whether you like it or not, you're going to win with them because they're
00:20:24.860going to drive expectation high with everybody. Then there are selfish people that want to win so bad,
00:20:31.560but they don't want to do the work. They want everybody else to do the work. And they want to take the
00:20:35.860credit. And I've dealt with people like this before, and I'm just telling you, once they're
00:20:40.360exploited, people leave. Okay? Because nothing is more annoying than dealing with somebody that's
00:20:46.260so selfish in the area of winning that's all about them and not all the other people. It's okay when
00:20:52.220somebody wants to win so bad that you're like, oh my gosh, this guy is so difficult to freaking do
00:20:56.600business with. Well, behind closed doors, there used to be a coach in baseball, skipper. His name was Tony LaRusso.
00:21:02.680He's still around. He was in a tournament before. Very, very educated guy. I think he went to
00:21:06.040some Ivy League school and he became a skipper. I think for Oakland A's. And players would say
00:21:12.120about Tony LaRusso, once you realize how bad this person wants to win, you will have such an easy
00:21:19.820time playing with this person. Once you realize how bad this person wants to win, you will enjoy and
00:21:25.180appreciate this person more once you realize that. That man is selfish, but it's positive selfish.
00:21:30.700You know why? Because it's kind of cool when you're also one day going to be able to talk about the fact that
00:21:35.000you have a championship ring. Why? Because you work with somebody that was so flipping, driven, and selfish
00:21:40.100to want to win that brought all these other people with them to the top that they also want. That is a positive.
00:21:45.120You need to know the difference. And it's very easy to tell the two selfish people apart. Just watch habits.
00:21:50.720That's all you got to do. Watch habits. But I got a name right here on who it is. A few of them, but I got one
00:21:55.700main name right here. I got to cover this quickly so you can't see what we're talking about, Mari. Can they
00:22:00.700see it? Number 23 is the following. Let me tell you what number 23 is. No need to improve. They have no
00:22:06.000desire to improve. Really, I mean, we had a person here that we were reading the book. We were reading
00:22:12.180a book. I don't know what book it was that we were reading. It was a book of the month, right? And it was
00:22:16.080a 500-page book that we were reading. And one of our employees said, I don't know why we have to read a book
00:22:20.780like this. I said, listen, I'm going to simplify it for you. At our company, if you don't read this
00:22:25.680book per month, you're fired. We're not offended. The reason why we do this is because we are very
00:22:31.000committed to improving. If you're not, we're not the company for you. But in this company, you're
00:22:35.480going to improve with us. And if you don't believe in improving, go work for a Fortune 100 company
00:22:40.560that's done improving and stay there quietly. Just have a regular 9-5 job that they don't expect you
00:22:45.540to improve. Here, improvement is a priority at the highest level. What do you want to do? If you don't want
00:22:50.720improve, you can go home. To us, we want everybody from the lowest $15 an hour job to the person
00:22:56.020making a million dollar your income, we want everybody to be committed to improvement. That
00:22:59.700is a priority that we have at our company. Number 24, perfect. Let me explain to you what I mean by
00:23:03.420perfect people. Oh my gosh, they're difficult. Okay, so what do I mean by perfect? Look, you will rarely
00:23:09.700hear me talk about my faith. Matter of fact, you won't get me talking about my faith on a value
00:23:15.040attainment. You know why? Let me explain to you why. The reason why is because I have a very hard
00:23:20.420time with people who talk about their faith so much to the point where it becomes almost
00:23:28.320like they're more righteous than you and they're more a believer than you and they're more of this
00:23:32.920than you and all this other stuff. That's okay. There's nothing wrong with that. And to the point
00:23:37.080where everybody is below them. Everybody is beneath them because they're so perfect because they are
00:23:42.360righteous and they are forgiven and all this other stuff. To me, I don't go to church because I want
00:23:47.900somebody to make me feel like I'm not imperfect. I'm not perfect. I know I'm not perfect. I'm going
00:23:52.860there for somebody to say that even though you're not perfect, there's a place for you, right?
00:23:57.600This message, what I just gave you in a business environment, it doesn't work with perfect people
00:24:02.660there because they walk around like they have this perfect life. Oh, my wife and I, we never argue.
00:24:06.720My husband and I, we never argue. We love each other. Everything's fine because we believe in the
00:24:10.220Lord and da-da-da-da-da. I can't deal with that. It's very difficult. Next, small thinking. Let me tell you what I mean
00:24:15.780by small thinking. Somebody who you're doing business with that doesn't really realize what's
00:24:19.440about to happen five years from now. I remember when people first got started, Mario and I were
00:24:22.420talking about this. There was a group of people who didn't fully know what was going to happen
00:24:26.800with our business moving forward. Fully didn't know. It's like, I don't know about it. I think
00:24:30.580it's good. Boom. They disappeared. We had certain people that started with Valuetainment when we had
00:24:35.360200 subs and they said, I don't really know if this thing's going to do anything. They disappeared at 200
00:24:40.080subs. We had people at 2,000 subs that didn't believe Valuetainment was going to be what it is
00:24:43.940today, right? But the true believers are here. The reason why many of you love Mario Aguilar,
00:24:49.620and let me put his handle up here. Let's send some love to him at Aguilar Social. He's on Twitter and
00:24:54.220on Instagram. Go follow him and send some love to him. The reason why you love Mario is because Mario's
00:24:58.900a true believer and Mario's been there from day one because he knew exactly what the vision of both
00:25:03.380our company and Valuetainment was, both of them. People like people like that, right? So small thinkers,
00:25:09.180unfortunately 90% of the world are small thinkers. All they can think about is what we're going to
00:25:14.660do in the next week. What's going to happen in the next day, in the next month, maybe a month,
00:25:18.720maybe a quarter. Very few people are saying, you know what? I believe we can be there five years
00:25:22.680from now. I believe we can be there 20 years from now. I believe we can be there 10 years from now
00:25:27.200and I want to be a part of it. By the way, don't fire small thinking people. Sometimes they're good
00:25:31.660for $15 an hour jobs and they're still going to get the day-to-day stuff fixed. But as far as you
00:25:37.080wanted to take the company to a whole different level, you need some of the people that have
00:25:39.960bought into the vision. Next. 26. You can't please them. You're going to have certain people you do
00:25:44.120business with. No matter what you ever do, nothing makes them happy, period. 27. People who change
00:25:49.640often. Let me explain to you what it means. One day you talk to them. I want to be your number one guy.
00:25:54.720That's it. I've changed. I can't believe I don't take more advantage of this relationship because
00:25:58.840you're so amazing and the value you bring to me. Next month, I can do whatever I want to do because I
00:26:05.880am an entrepreneur. I can do whatever I want to do. You're right. You can do anything you want to do.
00:26:10.020But what's up with this changing all the time? You know, you're like the weather. One day you're
00:26:13.640rainy. One minute you're snowing. One minute it's sunny. One minute it's gloomy. Which one is showing
00:26:18.240up today? Who are we going to meet today? Tell me. So I know in advance. Can I take the manual out?
00:26:22.320Give me page number 88. It's who we're dealing with today. Perfect. Now I know how to deal with you
00:26:27.620today because I know who's showing up today, right? People who change often, they don't know this. They lose a lot
00:26:34.940good people in their lives. A lot of good people in their lives because eventually they drain other
00:26:40.300people of their energy to love them. They're draining because they always change. And they
00:26:48.040think it's okay to do that. And they can be like that their entire lives. You lose the right people
00:26:53.160in your life. Forget about all the other people that stick around because it's your fan base and
00:26:56.620your fan club. You will lose the right people in your life. And you do not. You never ever want to
00:27:00.900lose true believers who are loyal to you and who you are as a human. You never want to lose them.
00:27:06.280But unfortunately, some people do it all the time, not knowingly. Next, 28. Crap magnet. I've said this
00:27:12.420before. You probably heard me say it before. These are people that constantly attract crap to
00:27:15.580themselves. Number 29. Self-inflicted wounds. You've heard me talk about this as well. There's always
00:27:20.960something bad happening to them. 30. People who are too honest. Let me tell you who I'm thinking about
00:27:26.680with this. My dad is so honest, it's out of control. Let me tell you what I mean by my dad.
00:27:32.500So, I have a friend from many, many years ago. He is frightened of my dad. And you know why he's
00:27:39.620frightened of my dad? Here's why he's frightened of my dad. Because my dad, if you are 20 pounds
00:27:46.160overweight and you've gained weight since the last time he sees you, this is my dad. Hey, what happened,
00:27:50.820Gordo? What happened, Gordo? That's his line if you're Hispanic. You look fat. You gain
00:27:56.660weight. What happened here? That's my dad. And let me tell you something. He will do this
00:28:01.660all the time. I'll see him sitting down with a husband and wife and he's talking about their
00:28:05.240sex life. I'm like, Dad, you can't be doing that, buddy. And he tells a story. I want to explain to
00:28:09.400you sex. Say this is sex, okay? On top of this cup is honey. Down here is shit. If you eat all the
00:28:18.260honey very quickly and you have sex all the time, you're eventually going to eat shit, okay? So don't do
00:28:23.700this. Take a nibble of the honey. Just a little nibble. I'm like, God, I'm kind of like a philosopher,
00:28:29.380you know? Like a sexual, you know, all these philosophers out there. But the guy is as entertaining
00:28:35.920as it gets. If you're around my dad, everybody loves my dad, but he's too honest. There is a
00:28:39.820good area for that. There's also a bad area that sensitive people cannot like people who
00:28:43.280are too honest. Which leads me to the next one. Point number 31 is sensitive people. Sensitive
00:28:47.080people cannot take any criticism from anybody, which means the only time they improve is based
00:28:53.700on your personal experience. Let me say it one more time. Sensitive people, hear me out
00:28:57.500if you're still here. For 90% of viewers that are done after the first 8-10 minutes, if you're
00:29:03.260still here for the 10% of it and you're sensitive, you know what happens with sensitive people?
00:29:07.440They can't take constructive criticism for other people. So you know what happens? Sensitive
00:29:12.460people can never learn from other people. They have to only learn it from themselves. Which
00:29:17.900means sensitive people have to make mistakes. Which means the speed of success is always delayed
00:29:25.760for sensitive people. Always delayed for sensitive people. Let me say it one more time. Always
00:29:31.720delayed for sensitive people. I don't want to hear this kind of stuff. You're right. You
00:29:35.860don't have to hear this kind of stuff. Go ahead and make the mistakes for yourself. Three
00:29:38.140years later, you were right. We could have saved that three years, by the way. But you had
00:29:41.340to go through that three years. Can't help because you're sensitive. Last but not least
00:29:44.480is excuse makers. They got an excuse for everything. And that part, it is what it is. You can't
00:29:48.520do anything about it. They're just people that make constantly excuses. I can't lead somebody
00:29:52.840and help somebody that's constantly making excuses. Now, maybe go sit down with somebody
00:29:56.460and say, let me ask you a question. Somebody who knows you. Somebody was asking me a question
00:29:59.680the other day in Bermuda. And I told this guy, good guy. I said, listen, the best way to understand
00:30:04.820yourself is, go to the people that know you very well, that you don't mind if they say something
00:30:08.840very honest to you that's going to hurt. Like, who are those? Like, my dad can't tell me anything. It's not going to hurt
00:30:12.600me. Tell me what's on your mind, right? There are certain people. Let them give you honest feedback
00:30:17.400about who you really are. Then make your own pivots and adjustments based on that. I'm not
00:30:21.760talking about negative people to go talk to. Somebody that's level-headed, that can give you
00:30:25.600direct feedback and say, these are the things that I deal with. What do you think about these? Which one
00:30:28.680is me? They'll typically be able to tell you and help you address those areas if you're not
00:30:33.280number 31, which is what? Sensitive. To all the sensitive people, skip this exercise because it's going to
00:30:38.600offense you. Go make the mistakes on your own. Take your time. If you have the courage to do
00:30:42.760this, more power to you, but most are not willing to do it. Thanks, everybody, for listening. And by
00:30:46.580the way, if you haven't already subscribed to Valuetainment on iTunes, please do so. Give us a
00:30:51.460five-star. Write a review if you haven't already. And if you have any questions for me that you may
00:30:55.680have, you can always find me on Snapchat, Instagram, Facebook, or YouTube. Just search my name,
00:31:00.820Patrick David. And I actually do respond back when you snap me or send me a message on Instagram.
00:31:06.620With that being said, have a great day today. Take care, everybody. Bye-bye.