How To Read People’s Mind - 5 Things People Are Thinking In Every Relationship
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Summary
What would happen if you could read the other person s mind when you re doing business with them? Think about if you can read what they re thinking when they re in a high stakes business deal, what advantage would you have over them?
Transcript
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What would happen if you can read the other person's mind when you're doing business with
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them? Think about if you're sitting across the table from a girl you like, you want to kind of
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date them, and maybe you're thinking about giving them the ring and proposing to them and getting
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married. Do you want to know what they're thinking about? They're thinking about five things. What
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if you're sitting in a business room and you're negotiating a deal with somebody else? It's a big
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high stakes meeting. If you could think what they're thinking about, how much advantage would
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you have over that sit down with that business deal, the person you want to have a serious
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relationship with? It would be massive. Today, I'm going to share with you five things everybody
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is thinking about when they're doing any kind of business dealings with you or a relationship
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If you give value out of this video, give it a thumbs up and subscribe to the channel. Let's
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get right into it. So, let me set the tone. You're in a conference room. This meeting you've
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been preparing for a month. It's a massive deal. You close the deal. It's the biggest
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deal of your lifetime. You're raising $10 million. You're selling a million-dollar house. You've
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never made this kind of money before. Or you're about to sell your business for $100 million.
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What do you do and how do you approach the meeting? You have this girl you've been with
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for a year, year and a half. It's at a point that you want to propose. Should you, should
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you not? What are five things you're thinking and they're thinking? These are the five things.
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Number one, no matter what setting it is, that person is sitting there asking themselves
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what your motives are. So, what is motive? They want to know what's his motive. Does
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he just want to date me? Does he just want to have me as a girlfriend? Does he want to
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become my husband? Does he want to marry me? What does she want from me? Does she just want
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to be with me for money? What motives do I have, right? Business. What's his motive of being
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here? Is he just trying to sell us one product? Is he just trying to be a partner with us?
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Is he trying to be a true partner with us? What's his motive? Number two, it's concerns.
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What concerns do they have? What concerns do you have? So, for example, my concerns are,
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she may be saying, I don't think he and my dad are going to get along and I think that's
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going to be conflict forever. I don't know if he wants to have kids. I don't know if she
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wants to have kids. I don't know if she, how many boyfriends did she have in the past?
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How many guys has she been with? What has he done in the past? Is he somebody that's going
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to make money? Is he a worker? Is he going to be good to me? I don't know.
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Concerns. Business. Is this going to be a good partner if we do a 50-50 deal?
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What if five years later he stops working? What's going to happen with that? What concerns do you
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have, right? Three, fears. There's fears. Man, the fear is they went through a divorce. His parents
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went through a divorce. My parents have been together for 32 years. They want to marry somebody
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whose parents went through a divorce. What if he does the same thing his dad did? What if she does
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the same thing her mom did? That's a big fear. I don't want to deal with that. What if all of a sudden
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she finds that I have money and she divorced and she wants to take all my money from me?
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What am I going to do there? That's a fear. Business. What if we do a deal with this guy?
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He tells me he's making six million year profits, but he's not. He's lying to us. What do we do about
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that fear? How are we going to handle this situation here? What if we give this guy $20 million for 50%
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of his company and then he doesn't work the next day? I'm afraid he may stop working right after we pay
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him $20 million. He's never had that kind of money before. He's made a little bit of money,
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maybe he's never made $20 million before. I'm a little bit afraid. What if I promote this guy
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and all of a sudden he was a good producer, but he's not a good manager. I'm afraid if we promote
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him, he may not be a manager. So, so far, motives, concerns, fears. Let's go to the fourth one.
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Assumptions. They make assumptions about you. You make assumptions about him. I think here's what
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he's going to do. My assumption is he's probably going to be like that. My assumption is, you know,
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his background, he's Middle Eastern. He's going to be like this. My assumption is this is another
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insurance person I'm dealing with. My assumption is this guy's going to take my money and run.
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My assumption is this. So, make a list of assumptions. He, she, the business partner,
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everybody is making. And then last but not least is the ask. What is his ask? What is her ask?
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Will you marry me? Will you be my wife? Will you invest $10 million into us? Will you accept this job
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offer we're making to you? Will you hire me? Will you give me this responsibility?
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Will you go into his partnership with me? Will you invest $10 million with us? Will you become
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our client at, you know, XYZ financial firm? Asks. The ask that they make. So, now watch. Say if I'm
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sitting down with a girl that I'm thinking about proposing. I'm going to make a list of all my
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concerns, all her concerns. All my fears, all her fears. All my motives, all her motives. All my assumptions,
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all her assumptions. All my asks, all her asks. Business meeting, the same. Then imagine if you
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said yesterday we had a massive, heavy, heavy meeting. You were in the room yesterday when we
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had this meeting. One of the heaviest meetings of the year. And a meeting was probably going to be a
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two-hour meeting. Instead of being a two-hour meeting, it just went into it and one by one by one,
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all those five things were hit. Concerns, fears, motives, assumptions, and asks. And a two-hour
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meeting turned into a 30-minute meeting. I said, I don't know if we have anything to talk about
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because this is emotion. This is logic. You came here and apologized. I'm fully with you.
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But let me tell you logically where we're at. Boom, boom, boom, boom, boom. What do you want to do
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about it? We take full ownership. Great. Come back on Friday. Tell us what you want to do because this is
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what our ask is. And it's a black and white ask. We could have been assholes, but we made a
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reasonable ask. They have tomorrow to give us an answer. So you're doing a deal and you sit down
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and say, John, if you don't mind, I'd like to take the lead in this meeting here and kind of go
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through some of the things that we have to cover. Sure. So, you know, I'm sitting here thinking about
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what you're worried about and what your concerns may be and what our concerns may be. Our concerns are
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that you like the money that's being made, but we're concerned whether you see this as a partnership
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or not. Your concern may be, you know, if we take this partnership to the next level,
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are they still going to pay attention to the quality of the business? I don't know. That may be your
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concern. I would be concerned about that as well. You know, our fear is if we give you exclusivity,
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then we may lose business from somebody else that could come to us and you may not improve your
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product line anymore. You may just be so comfortable with us. So we're afraid that if we give you
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exclusivity, then your product line is not going to improve the next three to five years, but we
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signed a three, five year exclusivity with you. Your fear may be if you produce four products for me,
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you know, and you spend $6 billion designing these products, maybe I'm not going to sell them. It's
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going to be a waste of your money. Our assumptions are that you actually like this partnership is
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profitable for you. You're probably assuming for us the same thing as well. And, but there is certain
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concerns that there's there and your motive is XYZ and your motive is to grow your base because next
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year you've got big numbers that you want to do. You kind of need us. And our motive is we need a
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product that's moving fast. And so we need you. So our ask is the following. We would like you to
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increase our comp plan that we have right now from 130% to 150% and add another $20 million of
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commission to us in return for that ask that we have for you. Am I pretty much on the same page here on
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what we're thinking and what you're thinking or did I miss anything? And in general, they'll say, no, I think
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that's pretty spot on. Okay. Do you have any questions? Well, let's kind of go through the process
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together. And then it's like, oh, we have nothing. And then the deal is done. Okay. But in order for this to be
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done properly, you have to put a lot of effort into knowing both sides motives. You can't wing it here. Knowing both
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sides, concerns, and fears, and assumptions, and making your ask. If you don't know those four,
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you cannot make the ask. Make sense? That's what I mean. And moving forward at the Vol Conference,
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I gave this perspective to all the CEOs. The entire event, everyone said, what's your biggest takeaway?
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The five things. That's all I'm thinking about right now. If you add this in your phone and moving
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forward the next 30 days, in every conversation you have with everybody, you think about those five
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things. Look how much more it'll decrease the amount of conflicts you're having with people
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because you're thinking about what? Those five things. So, if you got value out of this video,
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give it a thumbs up and subscribe to the channel. If you have any questions for me about topics like
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this, you want to go a little bit deeper, manek me. My manek QR code is going to be right here
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as well as in the description. And there's another video I did six or seven years ago. It talks about
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how eight ways to improve conflicts. If you want to watch that, click on a link above as well.
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You'll be able to watch that video. Take care, everybody. Bye-bye.