Valuetainment - “The Secret To Living Longer” - Longevity Doctor EXPLAINS Why Marriage & Kids Extend Lifespan

00:00:00.280 Investing is all about the future.

00:00:02.400 So, what do you think is going to happen?

00:00:04.320 Bitcoin is sort of inevitable at this point.

00:00:06.840 I think it would come down to precious metals.

00:00:09.400 I hope we don't go cashless.

00:00:11.540 I would say land is a safe investment.

00:00:14.100 Technology, companies.

00:00:15.240 Solar energy.

00:00:16.260 Robotic pollinators might be a thing. 1.00

00:00:18.840 A wrestler to face a robot.

00:00:20.560 That will have to happen.

00:00:22.140 So, whatever you think is going to happen in the future,

00:00:25.640 you can invest in it at Wealthsimple.

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00:00:30.200 You're married and you have kids.

00:00:32.620 Yes.

00:00:32.740 How many kids do you guys have?

00:00:33.700 I have one.

00:00:34.260 Okay.

00:00:34.920 So, what is healthier?

00:00:36.840 Being married with kids, married no kids, or staying single?

00:00:41.440 I would say.

00:00:42.000 Is there any ties to health?

00:00:43.420 Absolutely being married with kids.

00:00:45.820 I think that's unanimously clear.

00:00:48.720 Why is that?

00:00:49.780 Because happiness is really linked to longevity and health.

00:00:56.120 And happiness, a very, very big component, as Dr. Arthur Brooks, who does research out of Harvard, I recently had on my podcast.

00:01:03.120 Arthur C. Brooks?

00:01:03.980 Arthur.

00:01:04.220 He's amazing.

00:01:04.900 He's phenomenal.

00:01:05.500 He's amazing.

00:01:06.340 He's phenomenal.

00:01:07.380 Yeah.

00:01:07.740 I mean.

00:01:08.260 Glasses.

00:01:08.660 He wears glasses.

00:01:09.060 Yeah.

00:01:09.340 He's amazing.

00:01:10.140 Yeah.

00:01:10.520 But his, you know, he's done research.

00:01:12.520 He's written two New York Times bestselling books.

00:01:15.140 And he's got a third one on the way coming in March.

00:01:17.220 He's amazing.

00:01:18.260 What he calls the macronutrients of happiness.

00:01:20.940 One of that is enjoyment, right?

00:01:24.360 And enjoyment is something that you get by experiencing something with another person.

00:01:30.400 It's not something that you're doing alone.

00:01:32.560 It's experiences with people that you love, right?

00:01:35.740 And if you're not married and you have no kids, I mean, you really have to really put in a lot of effort to try to have that enjoyment, right?

00:01:44.440 Married with kids, you've got your spouse.

00:01:47.200 You've got your kids.

00:01:47.860 I mean, anyone that's a parent knows the love you feel for them is unmeasurable.

00:01:52.420 I mean, it's just, and the joy you get from being their parents, sure, there's, like, hard times, but the joy is also, I mean, it's, you can't describe it.

00:02:01.640 You can't measure it.

00:02:02.540 It's amazing.

00:02:03.800 And there's also studies showing that, right?

00:02:05.720 That, you know, married couples and having children is associated with a longer life.

00:02:10.760 Like, having that family tie, having those relationships are so important.

00:02:15.960 Now, I'm not just saying, I'm not saying all those single people out there.

00:02:18.500 I know it's like a thing now.

00:02:19.560 There's, like, younger people that are like, oh, I'm never going to get married.

00:02:21.700 I'm not going to have a second thing.

00:02:22.420 No kids.

00:02:22.920 I'm going to live for me.

00:02:24.040 I don't want to ruin my body.

00:02:26.160 And, you know, I don't want to lose my time, my freedom, and all this stuff.

00:02:29.960 You hear a lot of that.

00:02:31.100 And, by the way, U.S. is at the lowest birth rate in the history of America.

00:02:35.260 I think we're at 1.58 right now.

00:02:37.900 And you know this.

00:02:39.320 The replacement rate needs to be at 2.1.

00:02:42.300 We're at 1.58.

00:02:43.360 So it is a trend that people go in that direction.

00:02:45.900 It is.

00:02:46.340 It is.

00:02:46.740 And, you know, I waited until later in life to have my son.

00:02:50.060 And that's, you know, because I was pursuing academic, you know, pursuits in my academic career.

00:02:55.860 And it is something that, I mean, I don't regret.

00:02:58.660 I have, like, an amazing son.

00:02:59.960 I love him more than life itself.

00:03:01.720 But, and it gives me a sense of purpose, right?

00:03:03.640 But I will say I wish I had started earlier and had more children.

00:03:07.760 And all I can say to people out there that are in that mentality is that as you get older, things change.

00:03:15.200 And it's harder to have relationships if you don't establish them early.

00:03:21.420 And a spouse and the love that you have for your spouse is so incredible.

00:03:25.920 And then when you bring a child into this world, sure, there's layers of complexity.

00:03:30.060 Sure, there's going to be times, you know, that are more challenging.

00:03:33.100 And it takes work.

00:03:34.560 Every relationship takes work.

00:03:36.360 But it's really, these relationships are really important for mental health, long-term health, disease risk.

00:03:43.560 I mean, there's all this, the Harvard, you know, longitudinal aging study showed that.

00:03:47.160 You know, these individuals with relationships, spouses, children, you know, family, friends, like, those individuals not only were happier, they lived longer.

00:03:56.580 You know, it's very important.

00:03:57.880 Loneliness is a thing.

00:03:59.060 You know, as you get older, I mean, if you're someone that's single, never married, don't know kids, and then you retire and you haven't really put a lot of effort into maintaining friendships, it comes harder and harder.

00:04:08.800 And you really do have to put effort in.

00:04:10.800 Loneliness is independently associated with early mortality.

00:04:13.620 And it's just not fun.

00:04:15.120 And people that are lonely then oftentimes will seek out that kind of pleasure and reward by themselves, and they'll turn to, like, alcohol, or they'll turn to gambling, or things like that, where it's, like, the short-term, you know, pleasure you get.

00:04:26.580 But it's really not, it's trying to feel the void of that enjoyment that you get from the relationships that are meaningful in your life.

00:04:33.820 I saw a clip the other day.

00:04:35.220 Rob, can you ask Alicia and Humberto about the clip of two women were debating, I said, where's this interview from?

00:04:42.160 If they can find that clip and send it to you, one lady is like, who wants to have a kid and be an underpaid Uber driver for your son that wants to go to taekwondo, a sport that he hates? 1.00

00:04:53.840 And the other lady just flat out, I mean, if you got this clip, I'll give you a second for you to find it. 1.00

00:04:58.800 It's a fascinating clip.

00:04:59.960 But it is becoming common of people not wanting to have kids, not wanting to have families.

00:05:07.420 Did you find it?

00:05:09.460 It is becoming an unpaid Uber driver for someone who doesn't want to go to karate and hates you anyway.

00:05:14.620 And it's hard, hard work.

00:05:16.680 That is a narrative that I'm going to push back on, which is part of the problem, which is that it's the narrative of misery, which has been promoted.

00:05:24.360 And it's not miserable to have children.

00:05:27.780 It's joyful.

00:05:28.800 It's the most incredible love you'll ever experience in your life.

00:05:32.300 But it's also really hard.

00:05:33.920 And I think we have a bunch of pussies, actually. 0.94

00:05:37.340 We are producing women and men who are pussies. 1.00

00:05:39.940 And I'll tell you what I mean by that.

00:05:41.620 They cannot deal with discomfort.

00:05:43.320 They cannot deal with frustration.

00:05:45.020 They cannot deal with sacrifice or hardship or responsibility.

00:05:48.620 They want it to be easy.

00:05:50.100 Who said raising children was easy?

00:05:52.200 You don't get the good stuff unless you put in the work.

00:05:56.400 And it's the same if you're out in the world.

00:05:57.960 Of course it's easier to go to a job than it is to stay home with a child because a child demands more of you.

00:06:04.500 But it also gives back more.

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00:06:24.540 I'm Kelly Kennedy.

00:06:25.660 I've been called a hope dealer for leaders.

00:06:28.640 And with over 300 episodes of the Business Development Podcast,

00:06:32.480 we'll guide you and we'll always be in your corner.

00:06:36.280 Follow the Business Development Podcast on Spotify.

00:06:39.020 And let's make 2026 your best year yet.

00:06:47.920 What do you think about what you said?

00:06:50.400 Well, I definitely agree with the second woman in terms of it being incredibly rewarding but also challenging.

00:06:56.980 But I think it comes down to, you know, not everyone has that negative outlook on the world, the pessimistic look.

00:07:04.600 It's hard, you know, I'm taking my child to jiu-jitsu and they hate it.

00:07:08.720 I mean, you can focus on negative things in life and not have a child.

00:07:12.980 Like that same person with that sort of mentality, guess what?

00:07:15.980 Take the child out of the equation.

00:07:17.680 Take the spouse out of the equation.

00:07:18.960 They're going to focus on the negative things in their life as a single individual.

00:07:22.700 What a great point.

00:07:23.620 Right?

00:07:23.880 What a great point.

00:07:25.200 So it doesn't matter.

00:07:26.100 That's how they are, period.

00:07:27.240 It doesn't.

00:07:27.780 It's the way they're there.

00:07:30.040 It's their personality type.

00:07:31.460 Right?

00:07:31.980 And if you're that person that's focusing on negative all the time, you're going to be miserable.

00:07:37.260 You're going to be unhappy.

00:07:38.580 And you have to find a way to change your thinking.

00:07:41.520 I do think, again, exercise is part of that because it does help you do that hard thing and things, everything else becomes easier.

00:07:48.500 But also, there's other things like being grateful.

00:07:51.340 Like, think about what you're grateful for in life.

00:07:54.000 Right?

00:07:54.200 Like, what do you have that, you know, you can be thankful for?

00:07:59.760 Because everyone has something.

00:08:01.020 Even if you're the Uber driver that doesn't get paid a lot.

00:08:03.560 You have your health.

00:08:04.800 You know, until your health goes bad, until you get a cancer diagnosis at the age of 40, until you have, you know, a heart attack at 55, until you get type 2 diabetes at the age of, you know, I don't know, perhaps 39.

00:08:18.420 You don't realize how important your health is or your parents come down with a cancer diagnosis or your sibling.

00:08:26.160 Let's say you don't have kids.

00:08:27.420 You know, you have something to be thankful for.

00:08:30.080 And when you start to focus, have a daily practice of that, what to be thankful for, it does help train your brain.

00:08:36.560 And there's studies showing that it helps train your brain to not be so pessimistic.

00:08:41.000 And so that's one thing to do.

00:08:43.440 In addition to the exercise, it's like the best thing that you can do, I think, is really daily exercise, physical activity, because it is hard.

00:08:53.240 It is something that trains your brain to do hard things, and other things become easier.

00:08:58.180 But also, there's a lot of endorphins that are released that make you feel better.

00:09:03.980 And there's also some evidence that, like, doing that hard thing when you're uncomfortable, when you're exercising hard or working out hard, or even doing a sauna.

00:09:12.760 When you're sitting in the sauna and it's hot and you're uncomfortable, because sauna does mimic moderate intensity exercise.

00:09:18.760 Because those things, or that uncomfortableness, is your brain's endogenous opioid system that is being activated.

00:09:26.420 And you're making something called dynorphin.

00:09:28.560 This is the opposite of endorphin.

00:09:30.560 Endorphin is the feel-good opioid.

00:09:33.040 Dynorphin is the thing that's uncomfortable where you're like, oh, this sucks.

00:09:36.720 I hate it, right?

00:09:38.080 There's a neuropeptide being made called dynorphin.

00:09:40.820 And guess what?

00:09:41.340 When you make that dynorphin, there's an adaptation that happens.

00:09:45.000 That adaptation is your brain going-

00:09:47.480 It's literally known as heroin?

00:09:50.180 Not dimorphin.

00:09:52.320 Dynorphin.

00:09:52.920 Rob, what are you doing?

00:09:54.360 You're confusing the audience.

00:09:56.080 D-I-A-N-O-R-P-H-I-N. 1.00

00:09:57.480 There it is.

00:09:58.620 Dynorphin.

00:10:01.180 So.

00:10:01.960 You were about to confuse people, Rob.

00:10:03.360 Yes.

00:10:03.880 So what happens is it's binding to a kappa opioid.

00:10:07.260 And when that happens, it's basically telling the brain, oh, I'm uncomfortable.

00:10:10.560 I'm uncomfortable, whether that's from exercise or deliberate heat exposure from a sauna or a hot tub.

00:10:15.400 That uncomfortable feeling.

00:10:16.620 But it's good for you.

00:10:17.520 Is good for you.

00:10:18.780 You have to experience that uncomfortableness.

00:10:21.760 Because what happens is then the brain adapts.

00:10:25.080 And the receptors that bind to endorphins, the feel-good opioids, they're called new opioid receptors.

00:10:32.840 They become more sensitive to the endorphin.

00:10:34.720 So after that uncomfortableness of exercise or deliberate heat exposure, every endorphin that you make is going to feel better.

00:10:42.120 Whether that's, you know, a kiss or a hug from a loved one or a joke that you're laughing at.

00:10:46.040 Whatever it is that's causing you to feel good for the moment, that endorphin, you're going to feel it more and you're going to feel it for longer.

00:10:51.840 So there are things that you can do.

00:10:54.100 And exercise being really, you know, a key, but also deliberate, you know, heat exposure from like hot tubs or saunas is another one that really can help with your state of mind, your mentality, your mood.

00:11:05.760 In fact, there's actually studies by Dr. Charles Rezon, Dr. Ashley Mason, some pioneering studies showing that if you do deliberate heat exposure, and this was a very tricky machine that they used, which was essentially raising people's core body temperature to a feverish state, where it's essentially like, you know, going in the sauna.

00:11:23.620 They're raising people's core body temperature one and a half to two degrees, or they're doing a sham control.

00:11:29.400 So they're getting people hot enough to think it's a placebo, like a treatment, right?

00:11:32.360 But it's a real placebo.

00:11:33.360 And they took these people with major depressive disorder, gave them this treatment one time, this was the pioneering study, one time, and they had an antidepressant effect that lasted six to eight weeks after that, just from one sauna exposure.

00:11:46.880 Now, Dr. Ashley Mason, she's at UCSF, she's now done follow-up studies using infrared saunas that are sort of like these heat beds where people are laying in them, their head is out, but she's also raising their core body temperature to, you know, 1.5 to 2 degrees.

00:12:00.160 And they're doing it multiple times, four to eight times.

00:12:02.740 These guys?

00:12:03.360 That's right.

00:12:04.500 And she's also shown that it really, in combination with cognitive behavioral therapy, dramatically improves a battery of tests for major depressive disorder.

00:12:14.660 I mean, these people, like, just to give you a sense of how potent this effect was, if you, there's a Hamilton scale that, like, this battery of tests that's done to measure, to basically assess people's mood, their depressive symptoms.

00:12:26.420 If you have, like, a three-point change that's considered clinically relevant, these people were having a 16-point change after doing cognitive behavioral therapy, which is talk therapy with the heat bed, so with the sauna exposure.

00:12:38.540 All this is to say, to get back to the clip of the person, the mom saying, why do I want to be a mom when it's, like, so hard, basically, you're dealing with these hard moments.

00:12:48.680 Is that, you know what?

00:12:50.340 Life is full of hard moments.

00:12:52.080 Whether or not you have children, it's going to be full of different kinds of hard moments, right?

00:12:56.140 And so the reality is, is you're missing out on that joy and the relationship that, who's going to take care of you when you're older, too, right?

00:13:03.340 I mean, there's all sorts of reasons to have a family.

00:13:08.620 It's, I promise you, the best thing ever.

00:13:10.400 If I had a My Way, I'd have 20 kids. 0.73

00:13:12.920 I'll never forget, we had a private equity guy in Santa Monica, his name was John Morris, and we were part of this Vistage group, and once a month, you would meet with him.

00:13:22.240 And I said, John, how many kids do you have?

00:13:23.880 He says, two.

00:13:25.020 I said, why two?

00:13:25.900 You're smart.

00:13:26.520 God, why do you have two kids?

00:13:27.780 He says, biggest mistake of my life.

00:13:29.420 I said, mistake of your life?

00:13:30.900 Why?

00:13:31.840 He says, tell me what we do in life, that the moment we get good at it, we stop doing it.

00:13:36.760 He says, I barely learned how to parent after two.

00:13:38.940 I wish we would have four.

00:13:40.620 I said, really?

00:13:41.200 Yeah.

00:13:41.960 You know, my wife and I, when we first started dating, I had her read a book called 101 Questions to Ask Before You Get Engaged.

00:13:49.520 And in the book, one of the questions is, how many kids do you want to have?

00:13:52.120 I wanted to have five.

00:13:53.340 She wanted three.

00:13:54.320 We ended up with four.

00:13:55.520 Okay, so we got four kids now, two boys, two girls.

00:13:58.000 Life changing.

00:13:58.640 I would do 20 if I could, like I said earlier.

00:14:01.580 Patrick, it's my biggest regret in life is not having at least another child, you know.

00:14:07.780 And, again, I try not to focus on that regret because that's the wrong mindset, right?

00:14:13.100 You don't want to be focusing on the negative because it's the same thing.

00:14:15.340 Is it too late?

00:14:16.540 I mean.

00:14:17.700 It's not too late.

00:14:18.540 It's not too late, and I may be trying to explore opportunities, but, you know, that's sort of a personal, I would say, question.

00:14:24.140 But what I will say is that for people out there that are younger and they have that mentality where they're like, I don't want kids.

00:14:33.220 I don't feel like I want to be a mom or a dad.

00:14:35.840 Mostly moms because they're the ones that expire earlier in terms of being able to have kids later in life. 1.00

00:14:40.340 I mean, there's options out there now like freezing down your eggs, you know.

00:14:44.760 Very important, I think.

00:14:46.100 I think that's like if you're one of those women right now that are like, I'm never going to want to have kids. 0.98

00:14:51.240 Because I would say to you, like, you may change your mind in 10 years, and it will be very heartbreaking if you don't take steps right now to make sure that you can have children later in life, you know, because you might not be able to.

00:15:04.720 So, but there's always adoption and stuff, and that's, of course, another option as well.

00:15:09.000 But being pregnant and experiencing the whole process, it's amazing.

00:15:14.380 It's just, I loved being pregnant.

00:15:16.000 I loved it.

00:15:16.800 Love being pregnant.

00:15:17.540 I do.

00:15:18.040 Oh, yeah.

00:15:18.840 I mean, you get.

00:15:19.960 I hear that sometimes.

00:15:20.960 I'm like, tell me why.

00:15:22.960 Well, sure, there's like hard times.

00:15:24.900 I mean, like you gain 50 pounds and, you know, you can't sleep well sometimes.

00:15:29.540 And there's all sorts of like you're feeling aches and pains because all the relaxants that your body's making to help prepare for childbirth.

00:15:36.700 But you're also like the oxytocin and the bonding and knowing that you are preparing, you know, everything that you're doing, what you're eating, and you're preparing this child.

00:15:46.380 And you're trying to give this child the best, you know, opportunity that you can to set them up right, right?

00:15:52.320 Like there's, it's all, it's all like, I guess, a matter of like how you, your outlook, right?

00:15:55.900 Mm-hmm.

00:15:56.140 It's better to try to focus on positive.

00:15:58.160 Yeah.

00:15:59.160 No, listen, my respect for my wife went, you know, of course, I love my wife.

00:16:03.360 But when you watch her have the baby and you're sitting there like once, twice, you know, this is, this is incredible what the women's body does. 1.00

00:16:12.280 You know, God's creation to be able to do that and go through the pain and it's amazing.

00:16:17.440 It's amazing.

00:16:17.980 But I appreciate you for being vulnerable here and talking about wanting to have more kids.

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Valuetainment - February 20, 2026

“The Secret To Living Longer” - Longevity Doctor EXPLAINS Why Marriage & Kids Extend Lifespan

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