Valuetainment - Why 60% of Gen Z Men Are Not Dating

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00:00:30.000 So there's a massive epidemic going on with young men, Gen Z specifically.

00:00:34.920 60% of them under 30 are not even dating.

00:00:37.560 By the way, 62% of them are not even wanting to date.

00:00:40.780 Gen Z men. 0.80

00:00:41.780 This is a high of 2019 when it was 51%. 1.00

00:00:44.940 So even though they're getting older, the older they get, they're like, I'm not even

00:00:48.280 interested in dating.

00:00:49.000 Why not? 0.96

00:00:49.620 Do you know what the average cost of a date is for Gen Z today when they go out? 0.99

00:00:53.120 $205. 1.00

00:00:53.840 Who's expected to pay for it?

00:00:54.920 Of course, men. 0.94

00:00:56.020 Millennials' average cost for dinner is $252. 0.99

00:00:59.280 Gen Z is 205. 0.87

00:01:00.320 The national average is 189.

00:01:02.200 We need more Gen Z dating because we need more babies, especially with our birth rate

00:01:05.420 dropping.

00:01:06.140 I'm going to share with you, if you're watching this as a young man, St. Pat, what can I do

00:01:10.280 to succeed in a market because I'm looking for girls?

00:01:13.880 I'm going to give you certain tips that helped me when I was 23.

00:01:17.440 Hopefully, it'll help you out as well.

00:01:28.580 still haven't subscribed. We're on our way to get to 10 million subscribers. We're less than 3

00:01:33.020 million subscribers away from getting there. It would mean a lot to us if you take a moment and

00:01:36.700 smash that subscribe button. Having said that, let's get right into it. Okay, crisis by the

00:01:41.980 numbers. We already know 60% of young men are not dating. 62% are not even trying to date,

00:01:47.080 up from 51% compared to just 34% for women. So women are like, no, no, I want to date. 0.99

00:01:51.980 I want to go out there and meet people. Young men are like, no, no, no, I'm leaving the marketplace. 0.96

00:01:54.820 I don't want to do this. Apps like Tinder are heavily skewed towards male users. 76% of Tinder 0.98

00:02:01.000 users are men. So guess what? It's like going to a nightclub and it's not ladies night. You're going

00:02:06.360 to a nightclub and everybody there is a bunch of men at a nightclub. Your options are you want to

00:02:11.380 go to a place where women are there. We're going to talk about that here in a minute. Studies 1.00

00:02:14.800 suggest roughly 80% of men are rated as below average in attractiveness, leading many to feel

00:02:22.900 inadequate or ignored. You know what's the interesting thing? Today I came back from

00:02:26.540 speaking at the school and there's all these kids in this classroom and I go up on the board

00:02:30.600 and I write these numbers down. I write 14 and I write three. I said, can I ask you guys a

00:02:36.700 question? Can anybody tell me what this 14-3 means? One girl's like, that's a date according

00:02:41.460 to a European calendar. And they're going through all this other stuff. I said, let me tell you what

00:02:45.100 this means. I walk into this classroom. There was 14 girls to three boys. And I sat there and I'm

00:02:52.120 like, wait a minute, these are great ratios. One of the guys, that's a boy, is my son. So I'm like,

00:02:56.700 hey son, you listen, you got a lot of good options. These are the types of ratios you want.

00:03:00.800 So now if you're watching and saying, how do I put myself in a position to have more options?

00:03:05.420 So when they say 80% of it's attractive and it's all this other stuff, look at some of the most

00:03:10.440 beautiful women in the world. Are they all married to attractive men? Not necessarily. So what did 0.65

00:03:15.160 these men have that these girls dated and chose to go with them? There's a reason for that we're 0.99

00:03:19.440 to talk about this so now biggest dating fears pervasive fear of being perceived as creepy or

00:03:24.720 toxic oh my god you're too much this is too much this is too pushy so approach anxiety a growing

00:03:31.160 fear of being viewed as disrespectful intrusive or contributing to toxic masculinity has caused

00:03:37.380 many young men to stop approaching women in real life which by the way young men if you're listening

00:03:40.920 to this you're creating this imagination this doesn't exist by the way this has been around

00:03:45.660 for a long time. You know what the hardest thing is today? There was a video the other day with

00:03:49.800 Charlize Theron, an actress that's been in a lot of different movies, Devil's Advocate, a lot of

00:03:53.680 different movies. This is supposed to be one of the most beautiful women in the world. I think 1.00

00:03:57.080 she was also in that movie with golfing, Legends of Bagger Vance with Matt Damon, if I'm not

00:04:01.580 mistaken. Can you verify this? The girl's asking her, so how many men approach you? She says,

00:04:06.020 you'd be amazed. Nobody. It's like, wait, what? You're this beautiful. No one's approaching me.

00:04:11.920 Why not? I don't know. They're scared. Guys are scared. So you really think if 34% of women are

00:04:18.620 out there that are off the market, but 61%, maybe men are just giving up and they're getting a

00:04:23.600 little bit scared. Because the reality of it is women, the right ones, want you to approach them,

00:04:28.580 and a lot of guys are getting out of the market. This is kind of like when 2008 happened. You know

00:04:33.720 what happened to realtors overnight? We had some 600,000 realtors in America in 2006, 2007.

00:04:41.060 Overnight, 40% didn't renew their licenses.

00:04:43.660 240,000 left the real estate industry because it was so difficult.

00:04:46.900 So it's like, oh my God, it's so hard to be in real estate.

00:04:49.220 Yes, but if you're good, the market's going to come back to you and have an option because

00:04:53.040 you have more homeowners that are looking for fewer realtors.

00:04:55.180 So you can look at that as an edge.

00:04:57.100 Now, let's look at this because some of this is valid.

00:04:59.580 Some young men are really going through it.

00:05:01.120 As a matter of fact, what's so funny about this topic is this was the conversation we

00:05:04.760 were having this last Saturday night when we were out with the family.

00:05:07.080 It was about dating.

00:05:07.740 with my 14-year-old, 12-year-old, and my family was sitting there. We're going through it.

00:05:11.440 Barriers to dating. Survey shows that the biggest barrier to Gen Z dating is not having money. 52%

00:05:16.380 of survey agree. Watch this. Not enough time because of career education priorities. I'm so

00:05:21.500 busy. I'm just trying to get my career going. I'm going to school. I don't have the time today. Great.

00:05:25.840 Men agree. Women agree. Blue is men. Don't want to commit long-term, so they're afraid of long-term 0.94

00:05:31.060 commitment. Bad dating experience in the past. You know who's had it? Every single one of us.

00:05:36.380 Either you were the bad experience or the girl was the bad experience, but we've all

00:05:40.020 been part of that experience.

00:05:41.700 Most of us lack confidence.

00:05:43.280 I'm worried.

00:05:43.840 I don't have the confidence.

00:05:45.340 We can work on this.

00:05:46.760 Not enough money for dating activities.

00:05:49.280 We can also work on that, which we'll talk about here in a minute.

00:05:51.840 So when we go lower and we're looking at the dating cost, it leads us to this, okay?

00:05:56.020 Dating, marriage, skills, gap.

00:05:59.380 Desire and attitude are not the problem.

00:06:01.140 They want to build connections that explore long-term partners.

00:06:03.480 This is young men.

00:06:04.100 Young adults need dating skills. 1.00

00:06:06.380 Lack of experience, social and emotional confidence, stretch, develop social skills, struggle to express interest in dating partner, struggle to communicate on a date. 1.00

00:06:14.820 Less than four in 10, 37% said they trusted their judgment when it comes to choosing a dating partner.

00:06:22.060 There's a book I read, which my assistant many, many years ago told me about.

00:06:26.040 I said, listen, I just made a decision.

00:06:27.340 I'm never getting married.

00:06:28.200 I enjoy my own company.

00:06:29.540 She says, yeah, yeah, whatever.

00:06:30.680 I said, no, I'm telling you, I'll go to movies by myself.

00:06:32.800 I'll go to dinner by myself.

00:06:33.820 I enjoy my own company.

00:06:35.380 She says, before you decide to be single the rest of your life, this morning I was listening

00:06:39.740 to this Christian radio channel, and this guy was talking about a book called 101 Questions

00:06:43.780 to Ask Before You Get Engaged.

00:06:45.760 So she says, you should go buy it.

00:06:47.000 So I'll buy the book.

00:06:47.680 It sits on my desk.

00:06:48.380 I do nothing with it.

00:06:49.140 I'm thinking, I don't have time to go through a book.

00:06:51.100 I open it up.

00:06:51.900 It's literally a question and an answer.

00:06:54.820 You write the answer.

00:06:55.700 It's blank.

00:06:56.860 So I went and started answering all the questions.

00:06:58.540 Some of the questions were not important.

00:06:59.540 I think 54 of them were important to me.

00:07:01.840 By the time it was done, I was like, all this time I thought I knew what I was looking for

00:07:06.420 for a woman.

00:07:07.220 I was looking for this. 0.99

00:07:09.020 That's crazy. 0.99

00:07:10.140 And then I wrote out exactly what I wanted her to look like physically, literally, height, 0.92

00:07:14.800 personality, temperament, because I wanted to see how she was going to be with my kids.

00:07:18.420 My personality is here. 1.00

00:07:19.820 I can't date a girl like this. 0.99

00:07:21.020 When I did, we almost killed each other. 0.77

00:07:22.680 It was like World War III.

00:07:24.220 Try to kind of find a way for temperament, right?

00:07:26.260 I'm thinking family, kids, long term.

00:07:28.500 And when my wife and I went on our first date, you know what I told her?

00:07:30.880 I said, I'm not here to hook up with you.

00:07:32.200 I said, I'm looking for a wife. 1.00

00:07:33.580 I took her to Borders. 0.59

00:07:35.020 I bought the book for her, 101 Questions to Ask Before We Get Engaged.

00:07:38.620 I said, if this freaks you out, I'm super comfortable with that.

00:07:42.000 If you're just thinking, I want to go out and have fun, that's not this guy.

00:07:44.780 There's plenty of guys out there.

00:07:46.280 I managed the expectations right there.

00:07:49.260 And I made sure she knew I'm okay if I lose her.

00:07:52.520 Too many times, if you're kind of like, well, but what if I lose her?

00:07:56.040 That's a turnoff.

00:07:57.340 No, this is my standards.

00:07:59.540 This is what I'm looking forward to.

00:08:01.640 This is what I'm going to do with my life.

00:08:03.320 If you value that, let's go.

00:08:05.400 If not, I totally get it.

00:08:07.200 If your approach isn't that way and the girl's looking at you saying, why is this guy so

00:08:10.980 insecure about his position and his situation where he's at?

00:08:13.440 This is where I'm at.

00:08:14.020 This is what I want to do in my life.

00:08:15.480 And remember, that wasn't the case with me in 2002 when I was 24 years old, 23 years

00:08:22.080 old.

00:08:22.380 I was, oh my God, I got to get this.

00:08:23.940 But I had to shift my mindset because I had to increase my what?

00:08:27.420 What was the confidence here?

00:08:28.380 somewhere it says confidence. I had to increase this. So when it says 37% questioning their

00:08:33.420 judgment, why? Because you're second guessing yourself. You don't believe in what you're

00:08:37.200 doing. Decision making with the business is the same exact way. Raising your kids is the same

00:08:41.180 exact way. You know what? I don't know if I'm a right 100%, but this is what we're going to be

00:08:44.860 doing. At least I'm leading to people I'm working with. So stay with me here. Because I got some

00:08:48.740 notes I wrote on the side that I'm going to go through with you as well. So I want you to think

00:08:52.240 about a couple of things here. Remember I told you to Charlize, their own story. Remember I told

00:08:56.540 you but she's like boys are not approaching me okay so guys don't talk to her is it on her that 0.97

00:09:03.660 guys are not talking to her is she too you know masculine and girl guys the one masculine girl so

00:09:10.860 maybe it's unattractive that you're too masculine so some of the ladies watching this i'm a girl

00:09:15.480 boss i'm a this i'm a that the other day i was watching a podcast with joe button i learned a

00:09:19.980 lot about women i think i learned exactly how the fall of man occurred in the garden of eden adam

00:09:25.420 and eve were in the garden of eden and adam said one day wow eve here we are one with nature at

00:09:29.360 one with god we'll never age we'll never die and all our dreams come true the instant that we have

00:09:34.380 them and eve said yeah it's just not enough is it

00:09:38.340 that's not funny i was just waiting for more well that was kind of his point

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00:10:25.420 she says i don't get it i didn't think that was a big deal joe says the guy just made his point

00:10:34.300 because no one can make you happy so but those are not the girls to pursue because you're never

00:10:40.720 going to make them happy you'll be miserable if you're pursuing those girls so if you're watching

00:10:44.860 this you're like hey i'm that girl well good luck to you i don't know what kind of a guy you're

00:10:48.200 going to find but you're going to make us happy because we don't want to date a masculine girl

00:10:52.240 So maybe she's the problem. 1.00

00:10:53.940 Maybe.

00:10:55.080 Maybe it's on the guys that are scared saying, well, she's too pretty.

00:10:57.720 She would never be interested in me. 0.92

00:10:58.860 Maybe she would be.

00:10:59.940 Maybe you ought to take the risk.

00:11:01.140 Maybe it's 50-50.

00:11:02.100 Maybe it's 5%.

00:11:03.020 Is it worth taking the risk?

00:11:04.520 Sure.

00:11:04.760 What's the worst thing she's going to say?

00:11:06.260 Not interested.

00:11:07.040 Okay, great.

00:11:07.480 And you move on, right? 0.92

00:11:09.360 And then maybe it's, you know, sex is too ill.

00:11:13.260 So it's kind of like, well, I don't know about that.

00:11:15.720 I'm just going to go swipe right.

00:11:17.500 And, you know, a couple of our guys, when we're on the road and we're doing interviews,

00:11:20.040 one of our guys, I won't say his name.

00:11:21.340 we're in LA and it's like, yeah, I'm going to see what the LA market's like. I said,

00:11:24.820 what the hell does this mean? I've been married for 16, 17 years. I've been in the same relationship

00:11:28.540 since December 29th of 2017. So I'm going to swipe right to see what the LA market looks like.

00:11:32.960 I don't know if you remember this or not. I was actually disappointed. The next time I'm like,

00:11:37.800 that's it? Yes, that's it. So you swipe right and you went and yeah. So it's become so transactional.

00:11:44.560 Why would I flirt with her? I already got what I wanted. So now you may say, Pat, that's not me.

00:11:49.760 I want something serious, fair. Let's talk about that. So what is the purpose of dating somebody?

00:11:55.200 What is the purpose of dating the opposite sex? Is it a fling? Like, I just want to go out there 0.99

00:12:00.820 and have fun. Great. So your outcome is different. Go swipe right. If your outcome is this, go learn

00:12:06.120 how to DM. Go improve your DM game. Go improve how to message better. Go improve what emojis

00:12:13.040 to send. Maybe some of you guys send emojis of a certain vegetable, if you know what I'm talking

00:12:17.860 about. That's the wrong approach. Maybe you don't know the emoji game. Maybe you need to get a

00:12:21.920 little bit better in the texting part, right? Because we used to make phone calls. Now people

00:12:24.800 are texting. But if this is the world you're solving for, it's a transactional world today.

00:12:30.500 We had to go pursue it. Today's transactional. Maybe you want to have kids. I want to have kids.

00:12:35.880 I don't really care who the wife is. I just want to have kids. Maybe you're lonely and you want

00:12:39.960 some attention. Friday night, you're sick and tired of going to the clubs. You would rather

00:12:43.800 go out with somebody, have a companion conversation. Your day ends. You come to your apartment.

00:12:47.780 You're sitting there watching ESPN SportsCenter, and honestly, your girlfriend's become one

00:12:52.380 of these guys on ESPN that you watch every night, or you watch a movie, or Netflix, or

00:12:55.860 a documentary.

00:12:56.400 I just want to talk to somebody.

00:12:57.380 I want to have somebody.

00:12:58.100 Great.

00:12:58.700 That's what you're solving for.

00:13:00.200 Maybe you just want to be cool, right?

00:13:02.240 And you're kind of like, man, I got a girlfriend, buddy.

00:13:04.320 Look at her.

00:13:05.220 She's a little hottie, because I'm cool. 1.00

00:13:07.180 I got a girl. 1.00

00:13:08.280 Or maybe you want a spouse.

00:13:10.140 If you're watching and saying, I want a wife, and you want to have a family, you have to

00:13:15.500 be selective. And your approach has to be clear. And even if this turns them off, turns them off. 0.93

00:13:22.920 So then this leads me to the last one. What leverage do you have in getting girls to come 1.00

00:13:28.080 to you? What's your leverage? Everybody has to have leverage. Everybody. You ever see these

00:13:33.620 Rupert Murdoch or Al Pacino or Robert Dino or they're dating 28-year-old girls? You think

00:13:39.760 the girl's with them because they have a nice six-pack? You think the girl's with them because 0.70

00:13:44.860 they have high energy and they go running six miles every morning. What do you think she's

00:13:49.240 dating him for? Fame and money and access? Maybe. What's your leverage? Is it the fact that you have 1.00

00:13:55.620 great connections? That's very valuable. You can get into places others can. So the girl's going

00:13:59.720 to be like, wow, who is this guy? He's very important. He's able to get into rooms in certain

00:14:04.000 places others don't. Who is this guy? Maybe it's your faith. Maybe the girl's like, I really respect

00:14:10.120 this guy, his faith, where he's at. Wow. His faith is above me. So when the other day I was

00:14:16.080 willing to do this, he says, no, God comes before everybody. Wait a minute. He's not as interested

00:14:21.060 in me as God. No. This guy's different. Everybody else would want to just have me drop my panties

00:14:26.620 and then boom, we get to work. And this guy's not, no, there's something different about this guy.

00:14:31.420 Huh? He's okay with losing me. He's interested, but his standards are higher based on the values.

00:14:37.300 I'm interested in this guy. Maybe it's human nature. Maybe you're good with people. Maybe

00:14:41.200 you're great. Well, maybe you're great with talking to people. You're good at choosing words

00:14:44.580 and you feel tension. Maybe you feel when you're talking to somebody else and you kind of know

00:14:50.560 this is not the time to push too hard. This is my opportunity. Here's how I'm going to approach it

00:14:55.540 in a more subtle way. Maybe I'm going to ask the questions instead of being a little bit too

00:14:59.920 direct. Maybe in this situation, I'm going to be direct. All that is part of human nature,

00:15:03.180 right you see some guys that are so comfortable with girls human nature maybe you're a leader

00:15:08.340 and girls want to be led the right ones want to be led maybe they look at you and they're like

00:15:12.740 wait a minute this guy's this guy's calm he knows how to calm me down i i feel very calm around him

00:15:19.140 there's certain things about his temperament i like right maybe this guy's going places right

00:15:24.480 you're not like making all the money in the world maybe you're making 30 grand a year right now 50

00:15:27.860 grand a year 60 grand but she knows you're going places when you talk to her you're like there's

00:15:31.600 something. There's a certain level of seriousness about this guy. Certain level. Not all the time,

00:15:37.500 but they want to see a little bit of seriousness with you. Whoa, this guy's serious. And if she

00:15:42.500 is also in a place that is looking for the same thing as you, if you're in the market talking to

00:15:48.660 girls that want this, or just want this, or just want this, you're wasting your time. If you're

00:15:54.920 in the market for this and this, you have to also go talk to girls that are only looking for this 1.00

00:16:00.220 in this. You're wasting your time talking to people that are not. What are you doing talking 0.85

00:16:03.180 to girls that are not interested in that? So it starts with you as a young man knowing what

00:16:08.200 you're looking for. So now, the other part, sense of humor. Notice there's a contradiction here.

00:16:12.940 Maybe there's an element of seriousness, but maybe you're funny. Maybe you have a sense of humor.

00:16:17.420 Maybe you have levity. And just like when they're with you, you make them laugh. I just love being

00:16:23.300 around him. He is so funny. So maybe phase one of the attraction is not even your physical looks.

00:16:29.920 Maybe it's just your energy being around.

00:16:31.560 It's like, I just really like this guy.

00:16:33.760 And then three, six, 12, 18 months later, it's like, you know what?

00:16:37.000 Why aren't you and I dating?

00:16:38.860 Maybe we should date.

00:16:40.240 I really like being around you.

00:16:42.260 There's something about you.

00:16:43.420 It may take a little bit of time, right?

00:16:45.980 Maybe it's your intellect.

00:16:47.380 We have a guy here, Connor.

00:16:48.760 When he talks, it's beautiful.

00:16:50.500 He's so smart.

00:16:51.560 Maybe it's your intellect.

00:16:53.180 Maybe it's your knowledge.

00:16:54.180 Maybe you're so well-read.

00:16:55.640 Maybe it's like the way you teach or tell a story like, man, that's

00:16:58.940 incredible this guy knows all this information maybe that's your leverage maybe you're famous

00:17:03.860 maybe you're not this is a one percent chance you're famous right you're a logan paul you're

00:17:08.960 a big youtuber you're a big tiktoker and people know who you are that's the leverage statics you

00:17:14.760 have money maybe your career is locked in your body looks good you got a nice six-pack muscles

00:17:19.560 maybe you got a nice face you're good looking maybe your family is well known they're powerful

00:17:24.580 They're fun. They're the pillar of the community. Maybe all of those things are your leverage. So

00:17:29.740 here's a question for you. We're going to make a PDF here right now to get at the end. I want you

00:17:36.300 to score yourself on zero to ton on every single one of these guys. And then put a plan and say,

00:17:40.820 which of these areas can I get better in? What can I do to increase my connections?

00:17:45.860 What can I do to increase my human nature? What can I do to get better as a leader?

00:17:51.320 I'm not that funny.

00:17:52.340 Maybe I can be a little bit funnier.

00:17:53.880 Maybe I'm going to always have five to 10 jokes in my pocket

00:17:56.100 that can be a good way to get people laughing.

00:17:59.000 What can I do?

00:18:00.020 Maybe this is a way that the onus becomes on you.

00:18:02.940 Maybe it's really on you, not on the girls.

00:18:05.300 Maybe men just giving up on dating,

00:18:07.100 maybe that's a sign that you're allowing the market

00:18:09.920 to make you want to not go out there and date.

00:18:12.400 I'm not a guy that's going to allow my kids and my peers

00:18:14.660 and my nephew and the people like that using that language.

00:18:17.080 So maybe you ought to change your language.

00:18:19.160 I remember I used to be a partner with all the girls, all this.

00:18:21.280 I'm like, I'm done.

00:18:22.240 It's not the girls.

00:18:22.920 It's me.

00:18:24.320 I'm going to increase my market value.

00:18:26.220 Then what happens?

00:18:27.340 That I got something, which is the bonus, called what?

00:18:32.160 Options.

00:18:33.720 When you have options, you talk to girls in a very different way, and they sense it. 0.94

00:18:38.280 When you don't have options, you don't.

00:18:40.500 You know how it is in sales?

00:18:41.920 I had a guy that would always come up and be like, my God, if I close this deal, I'm going to make $50,000.

00:18:48.380 And I'm like, who else are you working on?

00:18:50.620 Nobody.

00:18:51.180 This is it, Pat.

00:18:52.920 I'm like, you don't have a pipeline?

00:18:54.840 No.

00:18:55.860 You seriously don't have a pipeline?

00:18:57.560 No.

00:18:58.080 Do you know the month I asked my wife out and we went on a date, I was talking to four

00:19:02.640 different girls?

00:19:03.780 The month.

00:19:04.820 The night before my wife and I were in Palm Springs together and she came and wanted to

00:19:09.520 spend three days with me at this business conference and we were not even dating.

00:19:12.540 I had just gone through a bad breakup.

00:19:14.280 The night before I was talking to another girl, I liked a lot.

00:19:17.420 But politically, we were on complete opposite side 0.96

00:19:20.300 Religion, we were on complete opposite sides

00:19:22.080 And there were certain things that she did

00:19:23.420 That just didn't sit well with me

00:19:25.020 So there was four girls 0.82

00:19:26.560 Every one of these girls had read the 101 questions 1.00

00:19:30.100 To ask before you get engaged 1.00

00:19:31.300 But I had options

00:19:33.060 Can you imagine if I'm just one 0.95

00:19:35.800 What if she says no

00:19:37.980 Oh my god, the rest of my life

00:19:39.940 And the rest of my life 1.00

00:19:40.720 Dude, she's not interested in you 0.62

00:19:42.680 Get over it 1.00

00:19:43.440 She's not

00:19:44.300 But I'm going to change it

00:19:46.280 Maybe, go do that

00:19:47.300 maybe you watch Notebook 200 times and maybe that's going to be your story. And maybe it's not.

00:19:52.180 And maybe she goes find somebody else. Then what do you do? But I'm telling you, in 15 years,

00:19:57.220 she's going to leave the senator and she's going to come to me. Maybe, maybe. And I'm not telling

00:20:02.420 you that doesn't exist. But I'll tell you one thing for a fact. If you don't have a lot of

00:20:07.000 options and you don't find a way to increase your market value, you'll be one of these guys here

00:20:11.580 that's talking about the percentages are so bad. And by the way, last but not least, what I'll tell

00:20:15.840 you is where are you looking for them? Where are you looking for girls? Because this chart,

00:20:19.460 if you look at these two, how couples met in 1930 versus 2024. In 1930, 22.48% was family,

00:20:26.780 then school, then friends, neighborhood, church, bar, restaurant, college, co-workers. Of course,

00:20:31.920 the internet was terrible in the 30s, right? It didn't exist. 2024, what's number one? 61%

00:20:38.240 online. Friends, co-workers, bar, restaurant, family, school, church, neighborhood, college.

00:20:44.480 Do you know what they said is typically the highest percentage of it working out?

00:20:48.460 It's coworkers and friends.

00:20:49.720 Do you know why? 0.98

00:20:50.180 Because if I work in a place for three, four years, I see her habits.

00:20:53.680 She sees my habits.

00:20:55.120 We now have credit with each other.

00:20:57.700 I know how she handled herself.

00:20:58.960 She saw how I handled myself.

00:21:00.760 And it's like, you know what?

00:21:01.640 Because that's what happened to my wife and I.

00:21:02.940 Five and a half years, we were in the same company.

00:21:04.500 We were always dating somebody else.

00:21:06.380 And then we were both single for two weeks.

00:21:08.040 And I said, hey, she comes.

00:21:10.220 We go, I said, what are you looking for in a man?

00:21:11.620 And she told me, I'm like, she just explained me

00:21:14.160 I said, great

00:21:14.680 We went downstairs, I had a glass of wine

00:21:17.740 She had a glass of orange juice

00:21:18.860 And then three days later, I'm driving her home from Palm Springs

00:21:22.280 And I take her home to Van Nuys

00:21:23.620 Her friends were following us in the back of the car

00:21:25.340 For two and a half hours, I'm just probing

00:21:27.560 Asking questions

00:21:28.560 Monday morning comes, I text her Sunday night

00:21:31.420 I said, meet me at Jerry's Deli tonight

00:21:33.020 She does, she meets me Monday night

00:21:35.520 At 10.30 at Jerry's Deli

00:21:37.080 For an hour, she's sitting there asking me

00:21:39.340 What's the secret to becoming a great agent?

00:21:41.260 What's the secret to becoming a great agency builder?

00:21:43.320 I'm like, do you think you're here because I'm teaching you how to?

00:21:46.840 I said, you're here, my line.

00:21:48.300 And she told us at dinner three nights ago.

00:21:50.960 I said, I'm here because I think you like me.

00:21:54.180 And I like you too.

00:21:55.560 And I think we should date.

00:21:57.100 That was my line.

00:21:58.720 How creative as a line was this?

00:22:00.720 Not very creative. 1.00

00:22:02.200 She freaks out, gets up and runs out.

00:22:04.260 And I'm like, wait, what?

00:22:06.280 I'm like, did she really run out?

00:22:07.720 She goes, but we're friends, but we're this.

00:22:09.240 I'm like, what are you doing?

00:22:11.600 So she leaves.

00:22:12.420 I come home.

00:22:13.040 I tell my dad, hey, I'm going to go to Pasadena, Texas, because she's going to her family to

00:22:16.380 visit on Christmas.

00:22:17.380 He says, you can't.

00:22:17.940 You're going to freak her out.

00:22:18.640 I said, I'm going to Texas.

00:22:19.700 She says, I'm telling you, don't.

00:22:20.760 I take my dad on MySpace, and I show her a picture.

00:22:23.020 I said, this is going to be my future wife.

00:22:24.280 He says, everyone's your future wife.

00:22:25.580 I had a lot of, you know, but anyways.

00:22:27.540 So I said, no, but this is the one, Dad.

00:22:29.240 He said, okay, okay, this is the one.

00:22:31.340 You know what ends up happening?

00:22:32.760 I send her a question on MySpace, and I say, aside from risk losing our friendship, what

00:22:37.840 other concerns do you have?

00:22:38.920 So I'm isolating the concern.

00:22:41.060 She responds back.

00:22:42.140 She says, nothing.

00:22:43.000 My only fear is we're going to lose our friendship.

00:22:44.860 Christmas Eve, I'm about to get on a flight.

00:22:47.200 She calls me.

00:22:47.900 We get on a five and a half hour call together.

00:22:50.140 She comes back home.

00:22:51.180 We go on our first day, December 29, 2007 to P.F. Chang's.

00:22:54.880 And the rest is history. 0.95

00:22:55.940 Now we got four kids together.

00:22:57.320 So you have to also find a way to get out there and put yourself on a market.

00:23:01.360 And by the way, this is one.

00:23:02.440 You know how many of them didn't work?

00:23:03.560 You know how many of them said no?

00:23:04.420 You know how many of them said they're not interested in the guy?

00:23:05.960 I think you're too strong personality.

00:23:07.500 You're too this.

00:23:08.820 And some of them I was interested in.

00:23:10.020 No, it's too strong.

00:23:10.900 It's okay.

00:23:11.940 It's part of the game. 0.96

00:23:13.160 The worst thing you can do is bitch about it and complain about it and join the market 0.95

00:23:17.780 that's always saying it's not fair, it's not fair, it's not fair. 0.97

00:23:20.000 I'm not part of that community.

00:23:21.240 And if you follow my content, you shouldn't be either.

00:23:23.680 You should make a decision to be part of the minority that goes out there and leads.

00:23:27.040 You should be part of the minority that says, hey, I'm going to go out there and find a

00:23:31.940 way to increase my market value, period.

00:23:34.600 So with that being said, if you got value out of this video, give it a thumbs up and

00:23:39.900 subscribe to the channel, specifically those of you that are part of the 51% community.

00:23:44.400 If you're watching this, you're married, you're like, man, this wasn't for me, but

00:23:46.840 I wish I would have watched this video.

00:23:48.660 Share it with somebody that's maybe single, guy or girl.

00:23:51.140 Let them watch this a little bit.

00:23:52.220 Let them get some perspective and have a debate.

00:23:54.680 Have this.

00:23:54.960 I don't agree with what Pat said here.

00:23:56.360 I agree with what he said here.

00:23:58.200 And so if you got value out of this, go through that.

00:24:00.220 And a couple of videos I want you to give.

00:24:02.400 I did a video, many, many, and by the way,

00:24:04.120 I can't even tell you what I said in these videos.

00:24:05.940 This is 10 years ago.

00:24:07.000 One of them was 15 questions to keep in mind

00:24:10.580 before you marry somebody if you're an entrepreneur.

00:24:12.720 And the other one was who to marry and how to marry.

00:24:16.060 If you've never seen these two clips,

00:24:18.220 click here to watch those videos.

00:24:19.660 And if you want the PDF of what I just talked about,

00:24:23.420 the questionnaire to score yourself,

00:24:25.340 there's gonna be a QR code somewhere around here

00:24:27.300 or in the link below.

00:24:28.220 Go to PBD Entrepreneur Circle, go score yourself

00:24:30.960 and see where you rank.

00:24:32.120 Maybe there's things that you can do

00:24:33.300 to increase your market value

00:24:34.980 in today's dating market.

00:24:37.600 Take care, everybody.

00:24:38.300 Bye-bye, bye-bye.

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Valuetainment - June 15, 2026

Why 60% of Gen Z Men Are Not Dating

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