Dating Talk #22
Episode Stats
Length
3 hours and 50 minutes
Hate Speech Sentences
159
Summary
In this episode of Whatever Dating Talk, we have a full house, and we have our first guest, who is a college student at UCSB. We talk about what it's like growing up in a small town and how it affects your self-esteem and self-confidence, and how to deal with it. We also have a question about who goes to UCSB and who doesn't.
Transcript
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La donna è mobile, qual piuma il vento, muta d'accento e di pensiero.
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Sempre un'amabile, legge addroviso, impianto in riso e menzognero.
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La donna è mobile, qual piuma il vento, muta d'accento e di pensiero.
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La donna è mobile, qual piuma il vento, muta d'accento e di pensiero.
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Welcome to the Whatever Dating Talk podcast, coming to you live from Isla Vista, Santa Barbara County, California.
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Every Tuesday and Thursday at 7pm Pacific, I'm your host, Brian Atlas.
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I am not joined by my co-host Kiki today because we have a full house, so she had to vacate.
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So a few quick announcements before the show begins.
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This channel is viewer supported, so please consider sending a super chat throughout the show.
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All super chats will be displayed in stream overlay.
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Yeah, fix this, though, because we can't see it.
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So we've got channel memberships, Patreon, merch.
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Tier 1, there's a promo right now, so it's just $2.50.
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We've got over 100 plus exclusive members-only videos, so go ahead.
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We are also streaming to Twitch right now, twitch.tv slash whatever.
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Go over there and drop us a follow real quick, and if you have a Prime sub available, free,
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Also, please support my nonprofit organization, the American Network Against Labia Plasty, or
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anal for short, we empower women who may feel self-conscious or insecure about their labia.
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And it's unfortunate, you know, that some women get shamed if they have a large labia.
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Okay, so can we get some hashtag all labia matter in the chat?
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So if you want to be on the show or help with the show, Eric, if you could just put it over
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If you want to be on the show or help with the show, DM at whatever on Instagram.
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We're looking for a talent coordinator, and yeah, so guy or girl if you want to be on
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So we're going to have the guests introduce themselves, so please tell us your name, age,
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So I'm Justine, I'm 19, and I'm currently a student at UCSB studying political science.
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I'm Alana, I'm 18, I work at a boutique, and I'm going to SBCC to study journalism.
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Hi, I'm Asal, I'm 18, and I'm unemployed right now, and I go to SBCC.
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Hi, I'm Jay, I'm 19, I go to UCSB, and I'm a sociology major.
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Hi, I'm Esther, I'm 20, and I'm a psych and brain sciences major at UCSB.
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Hi, I'm Yukina, I'm 21, and my majors are going to UCSB as well.
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Okay, sweet, so all the girls' Instagrams are in the description.
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So, by the way, do you go to UCSB, or did you go to UCSB?
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Okay, really quick, just show of hands, I think everyone here is at UCSB besides two of you go to CC?
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So, do those of you who go to UCSB, when it comes to dating, do you look down upon men who go to Santa Barbara City College?
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Well, I don't look down upon men who go to SBCC, but I am 22, so most men at SBCC are like 18, 19.
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Like, you don't know their situation or whatever.
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Everyone's, you know, just treat everyone equally.
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I mean, do you have, do you know this, do you prefer the guys at UCSB, you prefer the guys at SBCC?
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Well, UCSB just started, but a lot of people say to talk to boys that go to UCSB, not the CC, because.
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They say they're immature, but I have to find out myself, so I don't know.
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I think there's already plenty of people, plenty of guys at UCSB, so I haven't really had the chance to meet any SBCC people.
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Everyone says talk to guys that go to UCSB, but right now, I'm okay with SBCC boys, so.
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So have you two had any bad experiences with any guys at SBCC?
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With me, I guess, like, some boys just are a little too over in their head at SBCC, just from the ones that I've talked to.
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Like, that's kind of a, like, thing that you don't talk to SBCC boys.
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I mean, they're only a year younger than me, but I feel like that's still, they're younger than me.
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I never met, actually, I never met the SBCC guys yet, because I'm a transfer student, and I don't know.
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Current relationship status, longest relationship, and are you on any dating apps?
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That includes seeking arrangements, by the way.
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The longest relationship I was in was for three years.
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And I have a few apps downloaded, but my, like, I'm hidden right now.
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My longest relationship was six months, and I'm banned from Tinder.
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It's because I didn't think I was old enough, and that's because I got it when I was 16.
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Well, I didn't actually, like, hang out with them.
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And we'll go around the table, but I do want to add a question to the dating app thing.
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I'm not on any apps, and longest relationship was less than a year.
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I'm currently single, but I had, like, a fling, but I wouldn't call it a relationship,
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because it was, like, technically a 30-day free trial.
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Well, if you're currently in a relationship, I don't suspect that you're on any dating apps,
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Every 14 days, you guys would break up, is what you're saying, or...
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I don't say I dated them, but they say they dated me, so I don't count that.
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Well, you said you weren't dating them, but they would say that they were dating you.
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My longest relationship was about a year, and I'm not on any dating apps right now.
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When I was traveling, I just wanted to scope out what was happening.
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And then, since that relationship, I am single.
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I was using the Apple, Tinder and the Bumble before, but I don't use anymore right now.
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So, I'd mentioned, as we were kind of going around, we talked a little bit about dating
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So, have any of you, those of you who have at some point been on a dating app, have you,
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any of you never met a guy in person from a dating app?
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But you've had a dating app, but you've never met up with anybody.
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I've met up with only one out of, like, however long I was on it, because I don't trust men.
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Like, you really have to convince me, and out of all the guys, I guess one did.
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How many months was he talking to you before you finally met up with him?
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It was, like, a week of, like, talking, and then he was like, let's hang out.
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And I was like, do I, and then I literally told him, convince me, and then he convinced me.
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And what was his response when you said, convince me?
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Was he like, fuck you, or was he like, no, here's all my good.
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Like, he was a sweet guy, responsible, nice, just overall really great.
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If you were talking to a guy and he said, convince me to date you, what would your response be to that?
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You just have to, like, really make yourself worthy enough.
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For me to talk to you and, like, spend my, like, give you my attention.
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And if you're not worthy enough, then on to the next.
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I'm going to come back to that really quick, but I want to just go around the table on my question.
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So what would your response be if a guy said, you're talking to him, you know, you're both kind of interested in each other, but he says, convince me to meet up with you or convince me to date you.
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I would do the same, and I would just not respond.
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Like, convince me is just kind of me being, like, sarcastic and funny and, like, oh, convince me and maybe I'll go.
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Usually a lot of things I say is, like, nothing I say serious with men sometimes.
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Or are you walking it back now that all the girls at the table said they'd clown on the guy for doing that same exact thing?
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And then they actually, like, give me the energy I, like, wanted, I guess.
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You know, my mom always told me to, like, go for a guy who just, who really respects you.
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I do want to open this up to the rest of the panel, though.
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When it comes to relationships, interacting with men, do you, who do you consider to be the prize?
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No, I don't view either of us to be a prize, especially being, like, bisexual, dating women.
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Well, like, nowadays, especially, about 60 to 70% of men are, I'll say 50, I'll make
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it even lower for you guys, of men are incels, and you just gotta wave.
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So, they're just, I don't know if the numbers are that high.
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I've never really connected as deeply with a man as I have a woman before.
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I don't know if it's the men I'm seeking out, probably.
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But, yeah, overall easier to deal with women than men in my experience.
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Actually, to go back on that, equally, I like both.
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Because they both have their issues, you know, men and women.
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Like, you just have to go through and find a good woman or a man, so.
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When y'all go on a date with a woman, who pays for you two?
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First date, I've never paid for a first date, no.
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How many of the women you've dated that you've had first dates with, like, how many first
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I feel like it's usually they're asking me out on dates, so whoever's asking out on
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I'm not paying for something if you asked me to join you.
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So, I want to bring it back to the prize thing.
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It's just, we both bring things to the table, so there's not who's more worthier and stuff.
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I think it kind of depends, like, what you're going into it for.
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Like, if you're, like, looking for a hookup, like, I guess, like, both parties are a prize
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because it's, like, you want the same thing, or I guess the hookup is the prize.
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But, like, in terms of relationship, I don't think there's, like, exactly, like, this is,
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I mean, like, guys will be, like, oh, like, she's a dime, she's a prize, whatever, which
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But I don't think it's, like, an actual thing, like, people think about.
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Yeah, I think it's an entirely mutual decision.
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Like, if you're both interested in each other, you both want to pursue each other.
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And then sometimes it happens in situations when one person is more interested than the
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But we can see across cultures how some are more male-dominated.
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So maybe the more Eastern cultures, it's still viewed that way.
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I don't agree with it, but it's just how it is.
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And in more Western cultures, we've shifted to a more equal perspective, which I think I'm more
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So you were the only one that, if I recall, that is currently in a relationship.
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I feel like this term single, it's a very vague term.
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When's the last time that you've hooked up with somebody?
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So, I want to, this is kind of like the last one before I get into some of the more specific
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So, before I get into the questions, is there anything dating related that you want to get
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So, just to give you guys a couple prompts, maybe you recently had a bad date experience.
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Or, I guess for you, too, women are also pissing you off in some way.
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Anything you just want to get off your chest, dating related.
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But, like, if somebody has a conversation with you about what they want with you, be it something
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exclusive or not exclusive, don't be mad if you try to change their mind and it doesn't
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So, like, if I tell you we're hooking up and we're not going to date, don't try your
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So, we're going to date because I'm not going to change my mind.
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But, so, and so you're not looking for anything serious.
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You're lying to yourself if you think you're going to have a serious relationship while
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you're partying in Ivy or partying downtown over here, in my opinion, from what I've seen.
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At some point in the future, do you want a serious relationship, you think, or?
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I guess just, like, don't get people's hopes up and, like, treat it like a relationship
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when it's not and, like, you know it won't be, but you're, like, getting the other person's
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hopes up that it will be eventually and then it doesn't happen and then it just ends badly
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Was it, so was it you doing that or was it the guy doing that?
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I just think it's, like, a universal experience for a lot of people.
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So the other person kind of playing that they're looking for something serious but really they're
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The only problem with dating I have, like, at our age is that dating is not even a thing.
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You get to know them and then you might stop talking after that.
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But, like, it's always, like, you hook up first.
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And are you, you dislike that it's kind of straight to hook up?
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Do you want to do the kind of more traditional courtship, let's say?
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Not right now, but, like, it'd be nice if it was an option.
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And I can't put, like, I'm good alone right now and I don't want to, like, add someone to that if I can't give them my attention.
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But a year from now, maybe I'll want to go on a date, but it's going to be SBCC and UCSB boys.
00:25:24.300
And just really quick around the table, do any of you, well, this might have already been some of your guys' things that you wanted to say as we went around,
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but do any of you dislike the hookup culture and that there's a lack of going on dates?
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I dislike the hookup culture because it's just, like, having sex with no feelings or connection is meaningless.
00:25:56.920
Um, and hook, hook, for, like, dating, um, me personally, I date to marry.
00:26:04.360
That's why I've never dated anyone before because I always want to know so I don't get let on because everyone just wants to hook up.
00:26:17.580
I'm 18, but, you know, like, you date for a couple of years and then, because it's never too early.
00:26:26.420
Like, if you met the right guy, you'd get married in three years or something?
00:26:31.260
And you want to have kids pretty soon or what do you?
00:26:35.780
Um, I despise kids, but, like, I'm open to the option.
00:26:43.520
I want to get married because I think when you find that significant other that you want to spend the rest of your life with,
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it's better than just going on dates with random boys and, um, trying the same conversation over again.
00:27:12.020
Anyways, uh, so, but what, you said you want to be married, like, couldn't you achieve that through a long-term relationship?
00:27:23.060
Just, I don't know, because for me, my, mostly because my mom always says date to marry, and, because that's what she did,
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and she says it's like you could develop a better connection that way, so you guys are committed to each other.
00:27:50.640
And so, thus far in your life, have you adhered to the date to marry principle, or not so much?
00:27:58.880
So, I didn't date anybody, because I was waiting until I become of, like, a certain age to start dating.
00:28:08.580
So, have you, wait, but hold on, but you've gone on dates, it sounds like, because of the whole color thing.
00:28:13.440
Um, I've given a try, but, because once you talk to them, and you feel the vibe, you know, you don't know if you're, like, connecting with that person,
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and if you are comfortable with them, so you just never go on another date, so, yeah.
00:28:31.620
Yeah, um, I think, like, hookup culture, it could, like, go, like, it could, like, be good.
00:28:38.480
I think, like, in college especially, like, there's kind of, like, you know, some negative connotation around it,
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but I think if you look at it, like, in a way where you're prepared for hookup culture, and you're not going into it, like, out setting your boundaries,
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that's usually when there's, like, a problem, because, like, a lot of people can learn a lot about themselves, or, like, their sexuality, or, like, about people,
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and what they, like, really like when they're, like, meeting people, dating, hooking up, whatever.
00:29:02.200
And if, like, you go into hookup culture, like, wanting to date someone, that's usually when it's a problem, because it's, like, you know, like, that's not usually what the other party wants.
00:29:13.380
So, it's kind of just, like, you need to set your boundaries, like, to see how you, like, really feel about hookup culture and dating in general.
00:29:21.240
For me, like, I grew up with Japanese culture, and then we do a little bit of hookup culture between, like, college students, maybe.
00:29:29.940
But I've never been to college in Japan, so I cannot say, like, yes or not.
00:29:34.440
But, like, hookup, I'm tired of hookup culture, because, like, a lot of guys asking me, like, like, are you Asian?
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Like, on Tinder, like, on the Bumble, or on the Instagram, they just want to fuck me, and then they just ask me, like, you want to come over at night, always.
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Even if I want to date with this guy, but he just want to fuck me, because I'm Japanese.
00:29:57.920
And then, you know, Japanese culture has more, like, porn or something.
00:30:07.840
I mean, there's definitely guys who have, like, fetishes for Asian women, but I would suspect if you ask the rest of the panel, I think guys just want to fuck, period.
00:30:20.980
I don't know if it has so much to do with you being Japanese, but you are right, guys, especially on the dating apps, they kind of just want to come over.
00:30:39.360
Well, like, because I, the hookup culture here is definitely strong.
00:30:43.400
It's strong in any college town, but it's just strong anywhere coming to this age where you're, a lot of you guys are just, you know, first year or second year out of high school, where it was more taboo to talk about.
00:30:53.780
But it's, like, you just have to, like, yeah, there's a lot of guys out there, that's all they want to do.
00:30:56.960
But then there's also a bunch of guys out there who probably would like to take you on a few dates and get drinks and do that.
00:31:01.700
So you just have to, like, like, sort them out, too.
00:31:05.080
It's, like, it's, like, like I said earlier, it's the guys you're attracting or approaching.
00:31:09.440
And then also, like, one last thing what us all said earlier about dating to marry.
00:31:14.700
I remember saying that, too, before, but then you kind of, you might always keep this opinion, but then you'll realize when you get older, you kind of date for experiences.
00:31:22.720
Because you can't know what you like in a long-term relationship or what you want in a partner until you kind of actually experience it firsthand.
00:31:29.720
So I kind of, I used to date to marry, and obviously that's, like, the long-term goal of any relationship.
00:31:36.740
But sometimes you have to date to see what you even really want.
00:31:41.400
Yeah, I was going to add on to what you're saying.
00:31:44.220
I feel like everyone, like, people come into college with different levels of emotional maturity.
00:31:49.480
And so I think the problem with hookup culture is that people come into it with different expectations, but then all want, like, sort of, like, they all experience things with each other.
00:32:02.960
But then no one wants the same things because no one, people at this age, I feel like, don't really know what they want.
00:32:08.440
So some people come and just say, oh, I want to hookup, but then this other person might say, might think, oh, like, I might want to hookup, but then through that, learn that, oh, they actually want a date.
00:32:19.900
So that's, like, the issue where people don't really know what they want.
00:32:22.740
But through the, like, under the, I don't know, the claim of, oh, I just want to experience things, realize that, oh, that's actually not what I want at all.
00:32:34.660
So I think going back to the anything dating related you want to get off your chest, you went, right?
00:32:48.800
So, yeah, it was just kind of going back a couple little things.
00:32:51.940
So is there anything dating related you want to get off your chest?
00:33:01.800
Or women are pissing you off in some way since you're bi.
00:33:05.400
I think everything, so, because since I've been on just, like, a couple of dates with some people, I, so I feel bad when we're going on a date.
00:33:22.540
And so my mom always said, like, try to split, you know, don't make them do everything.
00:33:28.260
So, like, if we're going on, like, a movie date, like, you get the snacks or I'll get the tickets or you get the tickets, I'll get the snacks.
00:33:35.980
So they don't think, like, you know, I'm, because some men just think, oh, they're after my money.
00:33:43.980
So your issue with dating is that you're frustrated that you have to split, or what do you mean?
00:33:54.260
I'm frustrated that, like, just, like, if you don't offer to, like, you know, split, they assume that you're a gold digger.
00:34:01.140
The men are assuming if the woman doesn't offer to split.
00:34:13.500
I don't know if guys are, I think it's nice for a woman to offer to split.
00:34:26.780
If we're in a relationship, sure, like, you might get tickets, you might get popcorn, but no.
00:34:33.940
By the way, I was being a bit, women should not pay for the guy, but I think paying for your own check, I think, is the go-to move.
00:34:48.160
Yeah, so you go on a date, let's say you go for dinner.
00:34:51.220
Yeah, whatever, you get wings, and he gets a hamburger, he pays for the burger, you pay for the wings.
00:34:58.120
That will never, either it's going to be, if we're in a relationship, if it's the first date, I told you I'm not paying for a first date.
00:35:06.160
Even if you ask, which apparently you've never done.
00:35:09.800
No, if you ask the guy or the girl out on the date, which apparently you've never done.
00:35:24.360
Yes, but if me, my boyfriend, girlfriend, whatever, we just want to go out and get some ice cream, whatever, yeah, maybe I'll pay for the ice cream.
00:35:30.300
But, like, that's not a problem for me, but, like, a sit-down, like, it's our anniversary or something, no, I'm not paying for that.
00:35:58.140
Some girls are going to be like, I'm going to fuck you on Valentine's Day.
00:36:04.240
No, I remember, like, last time my ex, I think I got him, like, two new PlayStation controllers or something.
00:36:11.340
I don't even know what the hell they were doing back then.
00:36:18.720
There's a lot of stuff I want to touch on there.
00:36:27.040
I mean, if the guy asked me out on a date, I would expect them to pay, but I would also offer all the time.
00:36:35.200
Like, every time, I've always been like, oh, I can also, like, pay for my thing.
00:36:39.660
Like, the offer's always going to be there for me.
00:36:44.020
And then they'll either say, like, sure, or, like, no, I got it.
00:36:52.560
And then if they, like, take me up on that offer, I would be a little bit like, oh, okay.
00:37:01.080
So, what you offer, the guy's like, sure, okay, cool.
00:37:06.840
And you'll feel a certain type of way about that.
00:37:08.940
I'll just be like, oh, like, you asked me on this day and you're not going to.
00:37:16.700
Where they, like, might not be able to pay, which is understandable.
00:37:25.200
Would that be something that's going on in your head?
00:37:49.820
I think that if he asks me out, then he should pay.
00:37:53.560
And if I, like, make the plans, then I should pay.
00:37:58.180
I think it's kind of, like, for the first day, if the guy asks, the guy should pay.
00:38:03.120
But then usually that will, whether, depending on how that goes, if it goes well, and then I'll ask, oh, this actually went really well.
00:38:11.460
And then I'll, like, you know, something else would happen.
00:38:16.860
So, I think it's kind of a back and forth thing.
00:38:18.600
Because splitting, I don't know, I feel a little bit awkward, like, splitting a check or something the first date.
00:38:22.520
So, I'd much rather if that person, the other person, Carrie, like, covered the first one, I'll just do the second one.
00:38:36.240
So, if, like, it went, I didn't really like it, I'll say, oh, it's, like, I'm down to just splitting it.
00:38:41.000
And then that's kind of a sign of, oh, there's going to be no second date.
00:38:45.160
For me, it would be, so, if you're going out to, if a guy asks you out to dinner, and he does pay for, like, the dinner, the whole thing, when we go get dessert, I'll be, like, dessert is on me.
00:39:05.920
And I personally know, like, some people might be going through some situations.
00:39:10.660
So, like, going back to the movies thing, like, if you are paying for my tickets, I'll be, like, yes, I got the snacks.
00:39:17.000
And then maybe dinner after the movie, I don't know.
00:39:20.820
Like, if he gets to dinner and then we go get dessert.
00:39:23.620
So, everything just, like, that's just how I personally feel.
00:39:27.820
With first dates, I feel like you're not usually going on, like, these really elaborate dates.
00:39:36.280
At least for me, like, most of the ones I've gone to, it's, like, you're getting ice cream or you're going to get, like, froyo or boba or something.
00:39:42.400
So, like, it makes sense if the guy would want to pay because it's not, like, insanely expensive.
00:39:48.140
I think if you're going on, like, an expensive first date, like, you might at least want to be, like, oh, do you want me to, like, pay half or something?
00:40:10.920
I mean, like, a lot of the times, like, if someone asks, like, your friends, like, oh, how'd the date go?
00:40:24.340
If, like, you like him enough or something, like, from the first date and, like, you went halfsies or something, like, okay.
00:40:32.280
Like, and if you didn't like him from the first date and he didn't pay, then don't talk to him.
00:40:39.920
I would say whoever's asking the other person out has the responsibility of paying.
00:40:44.520
Whether, like, if I'm asking someone out, then I'll obviously pay.
00:40:56.800
Just your face is getting blocked by the microphone.
00:41:01.000
Yeah, and I won't do the splitting the check just because of the, like, awkward interaction.
00:41:06.740
So I'll try to get something after, like, ice cream or, like, yeah, pay them back in another way.
00:41:23.640
So sometimes I ask him, like, should I pay, like, you know, like, should we, like, split the bill?
00:41:30.580
But to be honest, after, like, after finish the dating, I feel better when guys pay for me.
00:41:38.460
Because, yeah, I don't know, because, yeah, I don't know, because, I don't know, because, I don't know, he looks, I don't know, just, this is maybe Asian culture.
00:41:49.380
And then I feel like, I don't know, when guys pay, it looks more cool.
00:41:55.980
I don't know, it's a really bad way to say, but, yeah, I personally want, yeah, a guy to pay.
00:42:05.100
So, really quick, would it be, if the guy said, he asked you out on the date, the end of the date comes, you were otherwise having a good time.
00:42:15.600
But the guy at the end says, hey, let's split the check.
00:42:32.160
So, my next question is, then, have you ever asked a guy out on a date?
00:42:50.260
Would you say that you've been asked out more than you've asked out?
00:43:00.020
But I, if I do really like somebody and they are afraid to make the first move, but there's
00:43:07.000
like a whole vibe, I will, I'll make the move to ask them out.
00:43:30.140
But more often than not, would you say that the men are, they're asking you out on the
00:43:38.100
But of all the times that you've been asked out or you've gone on a first date or you've
00:43:44.220
met up with someone, would you say more often than not, it was the guy initiating that?
00:43:59.800
A take that probably, you guys are free to disagree with me on this, but here it goes.
00:44:16.300
Because when you're going on a first date with someone, the likelihood that that's going
00:44:22.380
to go anywhere is so greatly diminished in 2022 because people have so many more options.
00:44:30.360
Because back in the day before, I mean, before social media, before dating apps, and even
00:44:37.860
you can go even further back in history, say in the 1950s when sort of these traditional
00:44:44.720
If you went on a date with someone in the 1950s, your first ever date with a woman, that
00:44:49.400
might be the woman you spend the rest of your life with.
00:44:52.080
Um, I mean, I've been on probably over a hundred dates in my life.
00:44:58.400
I'm sure you guys have been on a fair amount of dates.
00:45:03.900
So it sounded like some of you haven't gone on like super proper dates, but, um, so there's
00:45:14.600
So, I mean, if your answer is whoever asks, men de facto are the askers.
00:45:20.360
So you're, if your answer is whoever asks should pay, your answer might as well be men
00:45:26.860
Uh, so I guess also the other thing is, is that the other issue I have with it is because
00:45:36.320
people are dating so many people, um, the guy paying for the date is him adhering to his
00:45:42.820
traditional gender role, but don't hate me guys.
00:45:49.460
I would say over 90%, probably 90, 95% of women are not traditional women.
00:45:55.520
So if I'm going on a date with a girl, the likelihood that she's fucking another guy,
00:46:01.260
she's probably talking, she's at least talking to some other guy.
00:46:04.960
She's at least fucking one other guy, maybe two, maybe three, maybe four.
00:46:08.260
So my take is, is I'm not going to adhere to my traditional gender roles if she's fucking
00:46:15.500
Cause it's pretty, as far as I'm concerned, it's a pretty big L.
00:46:17.840
If I take a girl out on a date, let's say dinner, I don't do dinner dates anymore, but
00:46:21.440
if I took a girl out for a dinner date, right, she gets some food, she gets a doggy bag.
00:46:27.360
So it gives me a, gives me an ass out hug, you know, oh, it was nice, nice date.
00:46:32.860
You know, see, uh, takes that doggy bag to the guy she's fucking, gives the guy she's
00:46:45.080
So it's just like all the traditional gender roles have kind of been thrown out.
00:46:51.360
Uh, so yeah, I'm not going to adhere to my, and I advise men to do this too.
00:46:57.900
I'm not going to adhere to my traditional gender roles with women who are not traditional.
00:47:03.940
Newsflash, 90% of women are not traditional women.
00:47:09.680
That's a very large number, I think you just said.
00:47:11.860
You think it's, it's more women are traditional?
00:47:14.380
I think men don't realize how much women are still traditional.
00:47:18.080
Obviously, both genders have strayed from the typical, oopsies, completely typical gender
00:47:26.420
But most men don't even allow women to not be traditional.
00:47:29.960
Like if I have a boyfriend or something, nine times out of 10, I'm doing majority of the
00:47:35.400
cleaning or the cooking or of some sorts like that.
00:47:40.840
So if you, if on a first date you ask me out somewhere and you can't afford the full bill,
00:47:45.840
you're obviously either living out of your means or something's going on.
00:47:59.980
I wouldn't mind staying home and being with my kids and never going to work.
00:48:03.560
He pays for, I'm not going to complain with that.
00:48:05.840
If you had a, if you had a partner who could support that, sure.
00:48:08.800
But if I have to go to work, that's no problem with me.
00:48:18.040
So do any of, I saw a couple of grimaces when I was giving my take.
00:48:27.980
I think you're inconsistent in your answer or like your comment because you said that the
00:48:32.820
men are traditionally the ones who are going to ask the woman out.
00:48:35.120
So that's the tradition you're willing to keep, but then the pain you're not willing to keep
00:48:43.600
And also I wanted to add that your point is correct about people meeting more, like people
00:48:48.980
Our circles are bigger because of social media, of dating apps.
00:48:51.820
This has been proven by like so many like research articles, everything.
00:48:57.560
But that means like we're not willing to settle.
00:49:00.600
So I guess it's like, are you willing to go past the first date to see, oh, is this my
00:49:06.400
type of person or do we move on immediately because the circle is so big?
00:49:12.760
So to answer your first thing, you're, you're saying that something about how men have to
00:49:23.980
So when you're, so when you girls are assuming that who invites you, men are traditionally
00:49:29.900
But then the men aren't traditionally going to pay.
00:49:31.760
So I'm just really confused, like the notion of traditional roles here.
00:49:35.300
Like you're unwilling to follow one, but willing to follow the other, which is totally fine.
00:49:41.700
So you're saying that I'm acknowledging that men initiate, but how can I simultaneously,
00:49:49.500
how do I reconcile that men, the bill should be split on the first date?
00:49:58.820
Well, I guess my question is like, you're willing to follow one rule.
00:50:04.340
And not the other, which is totally cool as well.
00:50:08.200
So, and I didn't really get my take on this, but I would be 100% in favor of women initiating.
00:50:14.380
But the fact of the matter is, is that women don't have to, and women, quite frankly, don't.
00:50:21.720
It's broadly speaking, most men's experience, I would say almost all men's experience, even
00:50:27.380
really top tier men, that they're going to have to initiate.
00:50:32.380
If, if men don't initiate, like, we don't really get hit on in the same frequency that
00:50:41.740
Like, most of you have probably been approached at a party, a bar or a club, maybe a couple
00:50:49.000
You probably got 10 guys in the night trying to talk to you, whatever it may be.
00:50:53.100
Um, but a guy, for example, like at a bar or club, if a woman goes to a bar or club, there's
00:51:00.860
a decent chance, like maybe one guy, at least one guy, a couple guys are going to hit, hit
00:51:07.920
If a guy goes to a bar or club, just goes in the corner, right?
00:51:12.820
Nobody's going to talk to him the entire fucking night.
00:51:15.060
He's going to sit there, stand there all alone.
00:51:18.660
As, as a guy, you go to a party, nobody's coming to talk to you.
00:51:26.480
Uh, most women will not initiate on dating apps.
00:51:32.480
I think, I mean, I can, I think I've been initiate like three times, three or four times
00:51:45.680
That's probably how much some of y'all get in a weekend.
00:51:52.940
But I feel like it has to do with us getting let down so many times that we're scared to
00:51:59.240
We have to know that they like us a little bit, at least before we do anything.
00:52:04.780
What do you mean by getting let down so many times?
00:52:08.820
So like it's mostly dudes getting fucking rejected like dozens or hundreds of times.
00:52:17.880
So we don't want to be the ones that hurt ourselves.
00:52:24.760
I think it's that guys shoot their shot more often than girls do.
00:52:28.000
So then when girls do, we want to make sure that it's actually going to like, it's actually
00:52:32.500
Like, yeah, well, and I would also say that when women do initiate compared to men, your
00:52:39.080
women's success rate is going to be far higher.
00:52:42.700
Like you're much more likely if you initiate for it to, to work versus guys, we got, we
00:52:48.460
got to, we got to, uh, play the numbers, numbers game a little bit.
00:52:53.600
I would think that it's, it's when the girls do initiate, we would think that, oh, if we're
00:52:57.860
willing to do that, other girls are willing to do it too.
00:52:59.980
So because say like this guy must be that worthy that we're willing to go out of our
00:53:05.020
way and like get the courage to actually, you know, hit on them.
00:53:08.400
But then if this guy's worthy enough, I'm sure other girls will do that too.
00:53:14.800
Oh, so you're saying that of the guys that you would initiate with, they're so high tier
00:53:21.720
Then you're thinking, okay, he's probably getting this from other girls too.
00:53:27.640
Or, I mean, even if he's not, like he still has a lot of options when he's initiating.
00:53:35.520
So did I, did I adequately address your, uh, question there?
00:53:42.480
Like how can we change the traditional dynamic then in all areas, right?
00:53:45.640
Like if you want to change it in splitting the check, that's cool.
00:53:49.020
And how do we change it to girls asking guys out too, right?
00:53:52.000
Like if we want to challenge the dynamic, how should we go about that?
00:53:57.320
I think it's really true, um, that I think women have been really, or like take the pain
00:54:04.760
A lot of them, I'm not saying everyone, and men can, that can be in reverse as well.
00:54:09.020
And so if the girl comes up to a guy, they just are terrified.
00:54:12.160
They're like, fuck, like, am I going to get like hurt like this again?
00:54:15.220
Because it's just like, that's what we think those relationships or interactions are going
00:54:20.520
And you might say, the guys say the, experience the same thing.
00:54:24.400
Like I think we, it's all very human and it's very sad.
00:54:35.200
I think we all just, there was a, recently an article I read, it was very interesting saying
00:54:41.180
Can you scoot the microphone to your left just a tad?
00:54:45.680
Saying that women now crave men who are way more emotionally available.
00:54:50.160
So the, the number of single men has increased drastically because women often have the
00:54:56.140
community of other women to support and talk to them.
00:54:58.640
And men often don't have those conversations with their friends, which is just the cultural
00:55:03.800
Like, you know, it is what it is, unfortunately.
00:55:07.180
And so men, women are not settling for these emotionally unavailable men.
00:55:13.520
But then I don't want to say anything bad about those men because it's really not their fault.
00:55:18.180
Like, it's a lot of the time it's the society and their parents.
00:55:21.480
A lot of, like, parents are from the older generation.
00:55:23.680
So they have these cultural norms that don't allow men to express their emotions.
00:55:27.360
All I'm trying to say is society is widely flawed, and it's not a fault of one gender or the
00:55:32.680
It's just whatever is happening right now is just awful.
00:55:42.560
I detect that you're a highly intelligent individual.
00:55:45.180
But okay, so that was very, and the chat seems to be liking your answer.
00:55:49.840
So that was a very insightful, very, very good answer.
00:55:53.260
So we haven't quite finished getting around the table.
00:55:56.880
I need to do a couple super chats here, and then we'll get back to some of the questions.
00:56:10.240
And then, Brian, why are you bringing such young guests?
00:56:13.120
What can they know about dating and relationships?
00:56:15.440
Also, I don't think you will find large labia among them.
00:56:18.620
Wait, you need 23 to 28-year-old guests, in my honest opinion?
00:56:25.500
I mean, I think so far the answers have been pretty good.
00:56:31.080
And so, girls, do you want to fire back at Glebis here?
00:56:46.580
Well, then, if he wants to know about that, he should probably tune into, like, another channel with older guests, I think.
00:56:59.580
It's just, you know, the thing is, Glebis is Santa Barbara is a very young town.
00:57:09.000
Collectively, I think it's 30,000, 40,000 students between the two of them.
00:57:23.320
We, over the last five years, it's been, like, the biggest enrollment.
00:57:27.220
So, let's say that there's, like, 40,000 or 50,000 undergrad students between UCSB and SBCC.
00:57:34.160
And then the thing is, is Santa Barbara is such an expensive city to live.
00:57:37.200
As soon as people graduate, a lot of people leave because it's very expensive here.
00:57:41.780
I think it's one of the highest cost of living areas in the United States.
00:57:48.220
I mean, I reach out to a lot of 23 to 20, like, older women, so to speak.
00:58:05.220
Girls are surprisingly insightful when asked raw or raunchy questions.
00:58:09.160
Who should get the check is, like, asking who's going to buy the condoms.
00:58:14.160
By the way, we are going to get you on that all stripper show coming up soon with Hensley
00:58:22.260
So, thank you, Brandon, for the $10 Soup Chat, man.
00:58:31.540
V-Bucks, I guess if anyone doesn't know, that's, like, the digital currency for Fortnite.
00:58:43.100
Like, would you date a guy who plays video games?
00:59:00.680
I suppose it depends, because a guy could just, maybe he plays an hour a day.
00:59:05.780
But there are some guys that are heavily into video games.
00:59:08.940
Some are even addicted, you know, six, eight, ten hours a day, all day.
00:59:14.360
So, maybe I should be a bit more precise in the question.
00:59:18.940
Let's say a guy who, I mean, some girls might say, even if he plays an hour a day, I'd have
00:59:25.280
So, maybe you can give your nuanced take to the question.
00:59:28.620
I feel like it's fine, as long as it doesn't take away from our time together.
00:59:33.380
Like, while you're playing video games, I can do my thing, and then we can be together.
00:59:38.100
Have any of you, and I'll add this on to the question, have any of you had a situation where
00:59:42.460
you're kind of seeing a guy, and you're coming over, and he's kind of almost ignoring you
00:59:50.600
So, like a boyfriend, but he's like, he just wants to play games, and you're kind of just
00:59:58.620
So, just bring it back to the original question.
01:00:02.740
If that was the case, I don't think I'd ever pursue that.
01:00:06.120
If they were playing video games at all, or just?
01:00:08.060
I mean, like, excessively, like, 68 hours a day, and then I'd go over, and then there's
01:00:11.940
not, like, he's just, I don't think that I'd ever be a case of, I'd even want to be with
01:00:19.520
Would it be your preference to date a guy that just doesn't play video games at all?
01:00:47.320
I guess one thing I've heard girls say that do have partners that play video games, if
01:00:52.900
he's playing video games, you know he's not cheating on you.
01:01:07.460
A girl could be there while they're playing video games.
01:01:13.520
I mean, as long as they have, like, ambitions in life, it's fine if it's, like, but if it's,
01:01:19.460
like, to an extent where they're just, like, that's all they're doing, then it's, like,
01:01:24.540
But as long as they're ambitious and, like, have goals in life, I think it's fine, yeah.
01:01:34.900
Let's say he's a Chad gamer, like, top-tier gamer.
01:01:55.800
So he's, like, and he's raiding on each of the characters.
01:02:05.600
But, like, three, four night commitment, he's playing at least 20, 30 hours a week.
01:02:12.640
But he's, like, he's parsing in the top 99th percentile on Warcraft logs.
01:02:17.620
So, and he's, like, he's got BIS, best in slot.
01:02:27.780
Like, is that, are you guys going to go for him or what?
01:02:35.360
And if he has, like, other than, like, all those great attributes, if he's, like, also in school or working, that's fine with me.
01:02:48.240
Like, it's rare to probably have that, I think.
01:02:52.260
Like, he just explained that to us for one minute, and we all lost interest.
01:02:57.820
Somebody who's like that, how do you have a serious comfort?
01:03:01.180
Like, I have to be, you have to be semi into games as well to date somebody like that, or else I'm just going to be sitting there, like, waiting for you to shut up all day.
01:03:08.840
Also, like, on his mage, he's first in line for Atiesh.
01:03:14.120
Like, I'd just pretend to be impressed and be like, wow, that.
01:03:23.760
I don't even know what game we're talking about.
01:03:24.820
And on his warrior, he's first in line for Gressel.
01:03:41.660
So, we never really got to finish the anything dating related, you want to get off your chest.
01:03:47.100
I think we left, you answered that one, I think, right?
01:03:54.340
I just think don't take dating so seriously, especially your first year of college.
01:03:59.560
I think, like, that's, like, when you're, like, growing the most.
01:04:03.080
And, like, you, like, really need to let that happen because, like, you might just get stuck
01:04:07.700
And, like, in relationships, like, especially long-term, people change a lot.
01:04:11.300
And it's, like, pretty natural for people to break up.
01:04:13.400
Like, it's just, like, something you have to do for yourself.
01:04:17.960
Don't, like, be so intense about a relationship so early.
01:04:23.000
I think I said everything that I had to say earlier.
01:04:26.680
You didn't have, like, a gripe or anything when it comes to dating?
01:04:34.540
Both genders are incompatible in the sense of, like, the way that society almost forms us.
01:04:44.420
No, I'm just saying, like, to really make things work, you have to communicate really well
01:04:48.560
because the other person's intentions will always be misunderstood.
01:04:53.320
Like, we're all different, including the gender, including the different types of people.
01:04:58.160
But being extremely honest, not only with the other person but with yourself, I think,
01:05:02.560
is a lot of people start lying to themselves a little bit.
01:05:14.220
Oh, so anything dating-related you want to get off your chest?
01:05:17.860
So if you recently had, you can kind of take this however you want.
01:05:21.760
If you maybe had a bad date experience recently or just generally something about dating pisses
01:05:27.580
you off, men are pissing you off in some way, there's a trend in dating that annoys you,
01:05:31.600
a frustration when it comes to dealing with men, anything?
01:05:40.360
Like, I'm not, like, trying to, I want a relationship or something.
01:05:44.500
Just, like, if I met him, like, I've met the guy who is, who I like, I just go with flow.
01:05:51.840
If I met the guy who is, like, he just want to fuck me, I'm just going to go away from him.
01:05:58.140
You know, I can't take seriously, I cannot take, like, I can't play with guys, I cannot
01:06:04.400
take seriously, so it is what it is, kind of, you know?
01:06:08.960
Wait, so your issue is that if guys are just, all they want is sex, basically?
01:06:15.100
Like, maybe I look like, some people say I'm kind of pretty girl, I look like pretty girl,
01:06:21.560
so that's why the guys can't come to me to fuck me?
01:06:26.880
Maybe, I don't know what, what's going on with me, but, um, I don't know, I, this is
01:06:37.500
I don't want to fuck any guys, like, for fun, I just...
01:06:45.400
I need to, I need, I, if I want to fuck him, I, because I love...
01:06:51.780
Yeah, if I, I, I find the guy, but I want to have sex with love, so I don't want to fuck
01:07:00.180
anyone with, without love, you know what I'm saying?
01:07:19.860
I think because, like, my relationship last, last, like, the last one was two years, and
01:07:25.400
I was really falling in love with him, and then I know how I love people, maybe.
01:07:32.240
That's why, if I have sex with a random guy, I don't feel good.
01:07:42.560
Like, there's no connection, so, like, you know...
01:07:49.400
It's like, after you just feel empty and lonely.
01:07:52.120
Like, even if I'm horny, I don't want to do anything.
01:08:08.280
I just don't need a, like, hookup culture for now.
01:08:17.940
Wait, so, you said you want to wait until love.
01:08:22.980
So, I want to go around the table on this really quick.
01:08:31.240
I mean, you kind of already answered it, but we'll go around the table.
01:08:34.280
How long do you think you should wait before sleeping with someone?
01:08:49.060
Okay, so you won't sleep with someone before the third date?
01:08:52.020
Okay, but you would, like, fourth or fifth date would be okay, too?
01:09:28.660
I, technically, one of them technically wasn't a one-night stand, but we were communicating
01:09:36.380
Like, for a year beforehand, but the way our schedules work out, it's hard to meet.
01:09:51.360
And then, yeah, because, like, he was traveling, and I'm here.
01:10:00.520
Yes, but I had already been talking to him for a long time.
01:10:05.140
I think it depends, but the three-date rule, I think, is also really smart.
01:10:17.200
You can honestly connect in one night, but, like, personally, like, just depends.
01:10:23.300
And, like, three dates is, like, a good minimum to have.
01:10:25.980
Have you ever hooked up with a guy the same day that you met him, or on the first night
01:10:37.820
I'm fine with the first night with, like, my age.
01:10:46.980
Like, I want to know that there's chemistry, so I much rather know the first night than three
01:10:53.760
Like, you're talking, like, if the sex is trash?
01:11:02.400
I want to touch on that, but we'll continue going on.
01:11:10.060
Like, to me, like, dates don't really matter unless I...
01:11:12.980
Like, dates is just a number, but then I feel like a month is...
01:11:18.120
I mean, it's a duration of time, which I think is a good measure of how long...
01:11:22.120
Like, how long you've, like, gone to know this person and to what degree.
01:11:26.120
But, I mean, couldn't you also say that you could go on two dates in a month or seven
01:11:35.020
Like, if you're using dates to count, then it would be...
01:11:40.020
I would just say consecutively seeing someone for a month and then on, like, a higher frequency.
01:11:46.300
So, I'm with her on that, like, waiting at least, maybe not a month for me, a couple
01:11:53.180
of months, because for me, like, if I were to have sex and there's no chemistry, like what
01:11:58.560
Alana says, like, you want to see if there's, like, chemistry, then I'm not going to enjoy
01:12:03.100
it, so I'd rather just wait and connect with that person, and then we'll see when the time
01:12:10.920
So, wait, you want to get the sex out of the way soon?
01:12:16.140
I'm saying, like, I'll wait, like, a couple of months, like, because if...
01:12:19.640
Wait, I thought you said you agreed with Alana.
01:12:24.360
But, so, when you're talking to somebody, I'd rather talk to them and go and hang out
01:12:29.360
with them and go on dates and see how it is, and if I'm feeling it, because then if I'm
01:12:36.040
not feeling it and I just get the sex out of the way, then I just feel empty.
01:12:42.020
Wait, so you sleep with men that you're not really feeling?
01:12:50.940
I think it depends just, like, have you been with sex?
01:12:55.440
Like, if you're just not the type of person that, like, can't just hook up, then, like,
01:13:00.380
it's probably going to take, like, a while, and that's totally fine.
01:13:03.760
I don't think there's a problem with waiting to have sex, but if you just, like, are into
01:13:07.660
it, like, that day, I don't think it's, like, a problem exactly.
01:13:11.360
Like, I don't think you should, like, shame someone for hooking up on, like, the first
01:13:14.340
Like, you could totally just, like, be into them and, like, want to have sex.
01:13:22.600
I think, for me personally, it would probably take, like, a month at least.
01:13:27.020
But, again, like, if your emotional intuition is telling you, like, oh, I really like this
01:13:30.560
person, I want to, or, like, I'm attracted to them physically, I really don't see why you
01:13:38.080
Like, no one knows your, like, past history other than you or maybe, like, your best friends.
01:13:44.540
But it's still up to you to make the decisions.
01:13:52.660
Yeah, but if I like him, I want to also, of course, I want to have sex with him.
01:13:57.080
And then, but why I don't have a, like, I don't have sex with a guy who I'm not dating with,
01:14:04.740
because if I have a sex, like, first day or even if I like him, he's going to think I'm
01:14:10.560
a slut or, like, he's not going to take seriously about me.
01:14:15.140
And that's why I don't want to have sex with him.
01:14:21.380
Because, like, if I really like him, and then he got horny, and he want to fuck me, but I
01:14:28.220
really want to take it seriously, and then I'm just going to wait, maybe, like, I need
01:14:37.140
Yeah, because, like, guys just, like, assume, because if you really like them, and they are
01:14:41.600
horny, if you just give it to them, like, there's no wrong, like, if anybody does it,
01:14:47.680
like, no shame, like, you do what you want, your body, your choice.
01:14:51.080
But it's just guys, most guys think, oh, she's easy, she's a slut.
01:14:55.980
Like, so, like, they just, like, don't think of you as anything more than, like, if you're
01:15:02.160
Also, like, I ask the guy, if he asks me to have sex, like, I'm just going to say, I'm not,
01:15:09.620
like, ready, and then I can't maybe trust that guy if he said, okay, I can wait for
01:15:20.200
It's a good indicator as to how invested he is.
01:15:23.900
Yeah, so, like, he likes you, and he's willing to wait while you're willing to wait.
01:15:37.180
It's, I mean, they're saying it's impressive if you could tell a guy you don't want to
01:15:40.320
have sex, and he's, like, cool with it, and understanding, the bar is in hell.
01:15:54.160
Well, so, I mean, I certainly agree that if the girl is, like, wants to wait, it's certainly
01:16:00.480
a good look to be like, hey, that's totally fine.
01:16:02.860
Like, I'm not pressed, we can, we can wait, but what if the guy, let's say the guy has
01:16:09.620
Maybe he has a three-date rule, or maybe a two-date rule, maybe even a first-night rule,
01:16:15.500
and you say no, and he's like, would you take an issue with a guy who, let's say you're hanging
01:16:23.060
out with him, and he wants to hook up, and you don't, and he's like, okay, well, you can
01:16:28.560
Have any of you, I don't know if any of you have had that, but would you take an issue
01:16:33.160
with a guy, hanging out with a guy, he wants to hook up, you don't, that's totally fine,
01:16:39.420
but he says, okay, well, I don't want to hang out with you anymore.
01:16:42.140
Well, yeah, I'm definitely not going to see them anymore.
01:16:48.140
Unless it was, like, planned, then it's, like, different, but, like, usually, no.
01:17:01.440
Like, because then you're like, okay, that's all he wanted me for.
01:17:04.160
Or maybe, like, let's say he doesn't, he's not going about it rude, but he's, like, he
01:17:08.680
tries, you know, maybe you guys kiss or make out a little bit, but you're just, like, you
01:17:17.980
So, he's kind of, like, it's apparent to you that he wanted to hook up and he kind
01:17:23.700
of wants to get on with his night, but he's doing so about as diplomatically as one can
01:17:32.200
Now that I've reframed it, I don't know if you guys want to come back in, or?
01:17:37.980
It would just make my mind think, like, Dan, like, he's probably poo-tanging it every
01:17:43.060
night, all day, 20, you got to get me out, get the next one in.
01:17:45.560
And it just makes you reconsider who you want to have, nothing wrong with getting
01:17:48.320
around, whatever, but it makes you want to reconsider who you're having sexual relationships
01:17:53.300
I feel like it's different if, like, you guys, like, are making out and, like, doing
01:17:57.220
other things, and then, like, it ended, and not, like, abruptly, but, like, he was just,
01:18:04.080
But if you were, like, I don't want to have sex with you, and he's, like, okay, leave,
01:18:12.840
I think it's just looking for, like, different things, and there's nothing wrong with that,
01:18:17.860
but just not to waste each other's time, I think is really important.
01:18:21.260
I think it's good for them to let you know, because if you're not interested in doing
01:18:25.460
anything more than just making out and doing stuff, then, like, and letting you know is
01:18:32.860
But I think there's, like, in a nicer manner it could be done than just, like, saying get
01:18:42.000
Yeah, I think you just need to, like, talk about it before you hang out, because I feel
01:18:45.700
like sometimes guys, like, will try to be, like, really, really nice and, like, gentleman-like,
01:18:49.920
so, like, you feel more inclined to have sex with them.
01:18:52.960
But if, like, you talk about it beforehand like that, like, you're literally just, like,
01:18:58.720
meeting up to, like, smoke and then, like, have sex, then, like, yeah, that's fine.
01:19:04.040
But, like, if, like, they're, like, they want to have sex and you don't want to, and they're,
01:19:08.000
like, okay, leave, like, okay, lol, like, I'm gone.
01:19:21.900
I would think, oh, he has someone else coming in, so I'm going to get out and not speak
01:19:31.980
So, I'm just going to leave and then block everything, like, shut down from him.
01:19:36.620
Wait, so you think it would be disrespectful, even if he was kind of more diplomatic and polite
01:19:45.660
Or ask, you know, kind of ending the night, so to speak.
01:20:01.940
So, I mean, my personal take on this is I'm not pressed to, like, get sex or have sex with
01:20:09.720
So, if she wants to wait a bit, that's totally fine.
01:20:17.640
I do know, though, that there are definitely guys where they're for, so I'm not speaking
01:20:36.260
Sometimes there's not a, it doesn't sync up between what both people are kind of looking
01:20:42.420
for, but I would say that if, so men are not entitled to sex.
01:20:49.860
Women are not entitled to sex either, but men are not entitled to sex, and I would say
01:20:53.760
that women are not entitled to continued attention, to continued time hanging out.
01:21:00.800
So, if a guy, he wants something, and you don't want it, that's totally fine, but I think
01:21:06.560
just like how you're in your right to say, I don't want to have sex, he's also in his
01:21:11.440
right to say, well, I don't want to continue hanging out with you.
01:21:20.880
It's better to come clean so they can break it off now, but it doesn't make it any, like
01:21:25.880
how we explained earlier, it still doesn't make the situation less disrespectful in a sense.
01:21:30.800
Like, if it was really me, if I was put in that situation, I would be like, all right,
01:21:35.540
If our plan was for you to stay the night or something like vibe out, let's vibe out,
01:21:38.960
and then maybe before you actually, it is time for you to leave, or in the morning, whatever,
01:21:43.500
and then I'd be like, hey, I don't know, seems like we might want different things, maybe
01:21:46.720
it's better off separate, but just being like, oh, you don't want to fuck, all right,
01:21:50.580
dip out, homie, it's like a little, like, damn.
01:21:55.580
I don't recommend guys doing that, but I think there probably are guys that are
01:22:09.860
No, we don't have any soup chats, so let's see, where did I want to go with this?
01:22:21.740
Stifler wants to ask the ladies to rate themselves on a scale of 1 to 10.
01:22:43.700
We're talking, like, for the area, like, all over the whole world.
01:22:50.160
Like, you know, you could be an Idaho 10, but, like, an LA 4, you know?
01:23:55.160
I guess I don't think that's the real Logan Paul, but, uh, yeah, Logan Paul's kind of a, I don't
01:24:10.520
Romanian women are known for having large labia.
01:25:02.380
So if the sex is bad, it's, it's a, you're not going to, are you going to give him a,
01:25:08.980
Like, you know, if there's still a personality connection there, but you can't figure it out
01:25:13.540
after a few times or probably not meant to bump parts.
01:25:22.300
Um, I mean, yeah, like a couple tries and if it's still not like crazy, awesome, then
01:25:30.280
Wait, I just need to address something in the chat really quick.
01:26:08.100
I need you to tone, tone that down a little bit, man.
01:26:20.360
Yeah, guys, let's keep, uh, we don't have any chat mods at the moment guys, but, uh, yeah,
01:26:28.260
No, uh, let's, uh, not, not be too toxic in the chat.
01:26:41.920
Um, I mean like, first time, it's like, common, it's fine, but if it's like a reoccurring
01:26:48.800
thing, then I don't think the person's right for me personally.
01:26:54.280
Yeah, I agree with that, because I feel like both people could be shy, and like, I don't
01:27:01.000
know, just doesn't work out the same, so you could try again.
01:27:04.960
Yeah, chemistry is really important, so I think for the first couple times, maybe you
01:27:10.480
can tell, like, you're still trying to get to know each other, but then after, if that's
01:27:13.820
like a continuous pattern, then probably not the best fit.
01:27:17.280
I feel like if you are, like, like, if you're sleeping with somebody, like, the first time
01:27:23.820
after, it depends on how long you've been talking to them.
01:27:27.040
If you haven't been talking that much, and you guys have sex, yeah, the first time might
01:27:33.040
But if you've been talking to them for a bit, and you guys have both been waiting, then,
01:27:38.220
and if it's bad, then I don't think it's meant to be, because I think there should be that
01:27:41.660
chemistry that you guys both have been building up.
01:27:44.200
I think it, like, depends, like, how they're going into it.
01:27:50.560
If they're like, oh, yeah, like, I'm going to lay hella good pipe, and if it's not, you're
01:27:58.620
But if, like, I don't know if, like, you like them, and it's just, like, you guys are, like,
01:28:03.980
But I think, like, if they're, like, really, like, legit the first time, it's definitely
01:28:08.180
going to be, like, you're going to, like, go back and be like, yeah, they were it.
01:28:18.800
Give it a couple of tries, but I think just communicate.
01:28:21.620
A lot of the time, different people like different things.
01:28:23.940
Our bodies are different, so let your partner know, and if you let them know, and they're
01:28:29.600
still not up to your standards, then you can let go.
01:28:36.340
For me, it's, I'll, if I don't feel good first time, I'm just going to, maybe we should
01:28:44.720
talk, and then if it's not works, it depends on, like, how much I like him, maybe, also.
01:28:55.920
You're, I mean, you said before that you want to be in love to have sex, so, I mean.
01:29:04.780
I don't know, if, because of the sex, I'm losing, like, my emotional for him sometimes,
01:29:25.840
I don't think anyone else at the table probably knows about that, but, is anyone else Japanese?
01:29:40.640
Yeah, just to explain it to the panel and the viewers, host club is something very unique
01:29:46.880
And, basically, it's a club where women go to get male attention.
01:29:53.180
So, there's hired men who, I guess, are kind of attractive and good conversationalists.
01:29:57.940
And, women will pay to conversate with men at these host clubs.
01:30:14.720
Maybe in other Asian countries, but I think it's really just in Japan where they have that.
01:30:21.620
Oh, in Thailand, they have kind of those things, too.
01:30:30.660
Or, I mean, most other countries, you don't see that.
01:30:33.100
So, but from what I heard is that a lot of the women that go to the host clubs, they're
01:30:37.600
actually sex workers themselves, and they're looking for, like, an emotional connection
01:31:00.980
Like, if the sex is bad, like, what are you going to do to make it better?
01:31:04.960
Because I feel like that would be a big turnoff for a lot of girls to have to show a guy how
01:31:13.000
Because a lot of women want guys to just get it.
01:31:21.160
Yeah, I mean, I'm not going to teach someone anything.
01:31:28.520
That's why I'll give you a few tries to, like, pick up on the fact that this is not vibing
01:31:33.680
with me, and then after that, I'm sure somebody else will love what they got going on, but
01:31:41.760
If you're, like, really emotionally connected, I think it's a team effort.
01:31:52.480
Yeah, if I liked him, then I'd tell him what I like, and he might like different things.
01:32:00.160
And I feel like also a lot of girls lie about cumming, so, like, guys don't know what girls
01:32:07.520
actually like because all these girls are lying to them, you know?
01:32:16.980
Yeah, that's pretty much one of the worst things.
01:32:18.760
Well, not one of the worst things you can do, but it's pretty bad.
01:32:21.480
Well, like, sometimes you just want it over, and you're just like...
01:32:29.620
Well, yeah, I think it's about the emotional connection you have with that person.
01:32:32.580
If there's a lot, then you guys, like, work through it, but if there's not, then it's
01:32:37.160
That just means there's no good chemistry, and it's probably not worth each other's time.
01:32:41.620
Wait, so I want to come back to you really quick.
01:32:50.980
Like, if it's bad, and I'm, like, not enjoying it, and, like, I just want it over, like...
01:32:56.700
Okay, and so basically what I guess my understanding is, once the guy's made you come, then he's
01:33:12.680
Are you talking, like, going down on you, or using hands, or whatever?
01:33:17.800
Like, and then they'll try to, like, make it...
01:33:21.260
It's just, like, sometimes it's not working, and I just fake it.
01:33:29.000
Like, I'm not emotionally attached to them, so I, like, don't really care to tell them.
01:33:34.100
Has anyone here not had an orgasm with a partner?
01:33:46.800
It was, like, six months, I think, but it was, like, really off and on.
01:33:52.840
He cheated on me, like, two days after he asked me out.
01:33:55.740
Can we get some candle vigils in the chat for Alana?
01:34:08.020
Anyone else never been able to climax with a partner?
01:34:22.320
And so just to go back around, I'm trying to remember what we were...
01:34:32.180
Something about working through it if, like, the sex isn't good.
01:34:43.860
Yeah, like, if you'd want to teach a guy how to fuck you.
01:34:47.860
So, for a guy, I think, like, if he likes different things, and if I'm doing something that, you
01:34:58.380
know, isn't working for him, you tell me, and then I could tell him what, like, what he
01:35:03.200
can do for me, and we just come to it together.
01:35:05.820
But if the next time it's really not improving or anything, because with the chemistry, it
01:35:12.660
should be, like, I feel like it should be good, and it's just, like, sex.
01:35:16.460
I don't know how you can be bad at sex, I'm going to be honest.
01:35:28.560
I lost my virginity a month before I came to college.
01:35:56.020
I mean, I would rate him literally 11 out of 10, because I recently...
01:36:05.740
It's just, like, we had, like, that connection, and he is very tall and an athlete.
01:36:22.480
We haven't talked about it, but we're seeing each other...
01:36:25.800
Because, like, we're friends, so when he comes from college and I go back home, we're hanging
01:36:31.660
He's also a 6'5 athlete, so, I mean, why is he going to commit?
01:37:02.520
I think you should, like, try to, like, communicate what you like.
01:37:06.700
I think if it's just, like, a hookup, like, you met, like, an hour ago and now you're having
01:37:10.160
sex, like, maybe it's hard to be, like, do this, do that.
01:37:13.140
But, like, it is, like, they're, like, it's hard for a lot of girls to have orgasms.
01:37:20.960
And if you're in a relationship and you, like, sex is a big part of your relationship for,
01:37:25.500
like, connection issues, emotional, whatever, then you're going to want to talk about, like,
01:37:32.180
I think definitely people think it's embarrassing.
01:37:33.860
And it's just, like, really easy to be, like, oh, yeah, sex was trash, like, done with him.
01:37:39.620
I mean, like, if you want to work through it and, like, actually, like, learn, like, about
01:37:43.420
your body and, like, guys' bodies and, like, how to, like, have good sex with people who
01:37:47.760
isn't, like, with people who aren't just that one person, then, like, it's good to communicate.
01:37:54.900
I don't know if you had any more, anything else you wanted to say.
01:37:59.120
I was going to say, I did, like, recently hook up with somebody here, and I'd still rate
01:38:03.380
the first guy that I lost my virgin to 11 out of 10.
01:38:09.380
Like, I feel like just nobody's going to top him.
01:38:16.600
I don't think anybody would be able to top him so far.
01:38:33.660
Well, I would say that, and you guys are free to disagree with me, it's harder to be good
01:38:55.520
Esther, I know you're dying to come in on this.
01:39:00.340
I mean, women have different nerve endings down there, simply put.
01:39:05.860
So, the fact that sex might not be good the first time is fine.
01:39:09.760
Like, the other girl he was having sex with before, just her body was different, and it's
01:39:15.300
But, of course, when you do communicate, and after the communication, if it's still not
01:39:21.100
But, it's okay to just, like, kind of guide them in the right direction.
01:39:25.760
But, like, to teach someone, like, the entire thing, I don't know about that.
01:39:29.240
But, like, to guide someone I don't think is hurtful, or, like, it makes me feel bad.
01:39:34.040
Like, I know my body, obviously, better than someone who just, like, isn't me.
01:39:39.760
So, and as far as the whole, who is, who is sex harder for?
01:39:47.600
Or, is it harder for men or women to be good and bad?
01:39:51.720
I think the way women form their emotional connection might be, like, might affect it
01:39:58.920
But, there are also some girls I know who, like, are just totally down to hook up, and
01:40:03.960
I don't know the actual, like, like, you know, the actual action of sex, I'm talking
01:40:07.800
more about, like, going to hook up with someone, like.
01:40:10.980
Oh, no, yeah, I'm talking, like, the actual physical act of sex.
01:40:14.140
Well, then I haven't done enough research, you know, I don't know what to tell you.
01:40:20.120
No, I mean, I'm just, I don't know it from the guy's side, like, you know, like, do guys
01:40:29.520
I'm just, I don't know how hard, like, okay, have I asked every single guy I know?
01:40:35.580
And have I asked every single girl I know how hard sex is for them?
01:40:40.720
Like, I don't have enough information to tell you.
01:40:48.960
So you, okay, you've had experience having sex.
01:40:51.340
I mean, but you can, you can intellectualize it.
01:40:56.420
What are sort of the performance issues that women can encounter?
01:40:59.600
What are the performance issues men can encounter?
01:41:03.960
I mean, it depends on every single woman and every single man.
01:41:07.500
Like, every, you know, I don't know how to generalize it.
01:41:11.560
Like, some woman might find it more difficult and some man might find it more difficult.
01:41:17.740
But overall, like, overall, generally speaking.
01:41:23.020
I think that, I think generally for women, it might be harder for us to enjoy it.
01:41:28.500
Because for us, I think the emotional aspect is still.
01:41:36.020
But then so much of that is emotional than physical.
01:41:43.580
I think it's harder for men to be better at it.
01:41:46.400
They have to do the stroke and do all that shit.
01:41:48.660
I could just lay there and he'll probably say it was amazing.
01:41:54.160
Yeah, honestly, I think most men, like, for men, I think sex is like pizza.
01:42:06.540
Like, one time this guy thought we were having sex.
01:42:35.000
How do you turn around and tell a man you were fucking my legs right now?
01:42:49.520
Has someone ever gotten your name wrong and you don't correct them?
01:42:55.900
If you told them at the forefront, it'd be okay.
01:43:02.360
You let it go on for too long and then you just couldn't.
01:43:23.920
The positioning kind of makes sense how that could happen.
01:44:27.660
More specifically, shaming, because I mean, slut, that term can have a couple different connotations.
01:44:33.780
Shaming people for being promiscuous or having a high body count.
01:44:50.060
But, like, say, for instance, you know somebody has a high body count.
01:44:54.920
And, like, say it's about STDs or things like that.
01:44:59.820
Have no idea what they're talking about in that realm.
01:45:01.620
It's like, you can't have a high body count and then be reckless and not even know what you're doing.
01:45:07.600
But as long as you do your research and you know how to be safe.
01:45:12.800
I guess, actually, I'm just going to reframe it.
01:45:15.820
Well, I guess you guys, we'll go around really quick if you guys want to answer the initial question.
01:45:21.440
I mean, someone can love sex and just, you know, it's their life, their body, their choice.
01:45:29.300
And it shouldn't be anyone else's concern except for theirs.
01:45:31.880
But, yeah, as long as they're safe and, like, they're okay, then it's fine.
01:45:45.140
Like, because some people just have personal issues going on that, like, what doing that just makes them feel better.
01:45:53.580
If they're, like, what she said, they're just going around and they don't get tested or anything.
01:46:03.300
So they're putting other people at risk to those diseases.
01:46:16.600
Like, a lot of people are, like, they just, like, go to that.
01:46:20.240
Like, oh, like, even, like, if, like, a guy doesn't want to, like, get with you or something, they'll be like, oh, well, he, like, is so ran through or something.
01:46:30.020
I think it's just, like, a thing for, like, your own, like, insecurity or, like, confidence.
01:46:43.400
But I feel like there's, like, definitely, like, more layers to it.
01:46:49.580
Like, why would you shame someone for something?
01:46:52.120
I'm sure we can think of certain things we could shame people for.
01:46:55.120
I don't know, in this situation is all I'm referring to.
01:46:57.420
Maybe educating someone if you find out that they don't use protection I feel like would be more beneficial to both parties.
01:47:04.120
Just kind of, like, hey, do you know, maybe you should get checked as your friend, like, I'm just telling you.
01:47:12.160
But shaming is incorrect in this situation because you don't know where they were at or where they're at right now in their life.
01:47:34.840
So the question is, like, is slut shaming wrong?
01:47:39.360
And more specifically, like, we're talking about someone who's promiscuous or who's sleeping with a lot of people, has a high body count?
01:47:47.620
I don't really shame, like, that people has a lot of body count.
01:47:51.520
But I'm, like, I don't want to, like, maybe as a Japanese culture, I don't want to say anything about my body count or something.
01:48:02.700
I just, if someone, like, ask me, like, hey, what's your body count?
01:48:10.640
So do you guys think that should body count matter?
01:48:22.660
Like, for me personally or in general for, like, everybody, should it matter?
01:48:32.400
I think I would say overwhelmingly men do care about it, but so should body count matter or do you take issue if a man were to care about your body count or other people's body counts?
01:48:46.600
If he found my body count an issue, I would just be like, you're weird, dude.
01:48:53.220
Especially because most guys I know, they can multiply mine by eight and you're stressed.
01:48:58.360
I mean, as long as you're clean, body count is just a social construct.
01:49:11.080
I don't, as far as it being a social construct, it is the number of people with whom you've had sex with.
01:49:18.580
Yeah, but I don't think it should be, like, a big deal.
01:49:21.540
So, you would date a guy that slept with a hundred women, or sorry, a hundred women before you?
01:49:37.140
I don't think it matters, because, like, if you were dating someone, and you guys had sex, like, three times a day, that's going to add up to, like, if someone was having sex with, like, you know what I mean?
01:49:53.500
So, wait, you're saying that the actual number of instances with which you've had sex is?
01:50:00.400
Yeah, like, someone, like, doesn't want to be in a relationship, but wants to have sex, obviously, their body count's going to be higher than someone that's in a relationship, and that's just having a lot of sex.
01:50:18.860
I personally do care about body counts, because it's just, like, being with that many, like, you said, a hundred, like, me, personally, I would get shocked, because, like, how did you just, like, fuck that many people?
01:50:48.860
But I just care about it, because I find it weird, because if I have a low body count, and then he has a high one, I would feel weird about it.
01:51:00.240
But me, personally, I wouldn't be with somebody who's in the double digits, like, higher, yeah.
01:51:11.220
Not rare, but a lot of people, like, have hooked up, and so they do have, like, higher body counts, or could have higher body counts.
01:51:21.640
But, like, of course, like, it's still, like, you know, like, how did you get to that?
01:51:29.320
Like, maybe, like, they came out of a relationship, and they're, like, a fucking spree, because, like, that's what makes them feel better.
01:51:34.180
You can kind of, like, you know, put yourself in their shoes, be like, okay, yeah, sure.
01:51:37.480
I don't, like, mind that it's high because of that reason.
01:51:40.740
But, like, if there's, like, some people, and they're, like, literally, like, just constantly, constantly, like, having sex.
01:51:47.360
Like, it's, like, okay, this is, like, kind of a problem.
01:51:51.280
Like, you know, like, why do you, like, live like that?
01:51:56.580
For me, at some point, I would just question, how does this person have this much time on their hands?
01:52:03.260
But if it wasn't, like, to that extent, I think I would just be okay with it.
01:52:08.560
For me, it's matter, because if he has a, like, body count, like, 100, over 100, I cannot trust him.
01:52:16.940
It's, it's, it depends on the situation, like, how he's been with the girls.
01:52:22.240
But if he said, like, over 100, like, I can't handle it.
01:52:31.340
I guess, like, your guys' answers, because, like, what, the oldest out of you guys is 19?
01:52:37.400
Yeah, I guess maybe me being 22, like, oh, these answers are just so cute.
01:52:41.980
Because, like, these guys are just lying to you guys most of the time.
01:52:44.000
I'm not saying that all of them aren't, but, like, especially in this area, any athlete in this area alone.
01:52:49.540
I was, I used to be an athletic training intern, if you know what that is, like, at the ATI.
01:52:54.900
Most of these guys entering their freshman year were already, like, they stopped counting in the 60s, 70s.
01:53:00.320
And I would see them, even if you take home one different person a week, that's already 52 people a year.
01:53:05.800
And these guys are taking home someone almost different every week, if not multiple times a week.
01:53:10.080
So, and just because a guy says his body count is 10 or under doesn't mean it actually is.
01:53:15.420
So, no matter what someone says, you still want to make sure they're clean and check.
01:53:19.540
They can have a body count of two and still have the, our own strand of chlamydia out here.
01:53:25.020
You guys just sound so, like, what I would say when I was 18 coming in.
01:53:32.280
I mean, both men and women, I think, are going to lie about it, you know.
01:53:36.120
I don't think you can expect people to be totally honest with their, you want them to come in?
01:53:41.400
I also think, like, a big thing is that, like, for a lot of guys, like, if you, like, haven't had sex, like, you're still a virgin right now.
01:53:50.460
So, like, I know a lot of guys, like, that, like, just, like, lost their virginity just to lose it.
01:53:59.200
Because they, you know, want to put up a front that they, like, pull bitches.
01:54:03.180
Like, girls, like, don't necessarily, like, feel that way.
01:54:07.500
They have to, like, go all the way to sex to show that they, like, pull.
01:54:12.060
Like, if they are not, like, sealing the deal fully, it's just, like, like, are you, like, really legit?
01:54:19.020
So, it sounded like most of you said that body count shouldn't matter or doesn't matter.
01:54:25.100
So, my question is, if body count doesn't matter, what's your body count?
01:54:48.820
Your employer, I get it, but, like, your employer's not.
01:54:57.200
So, then be the change you want to see in the world.
01:55:30.380
Multiply it by three and that's the real number.
01:55:33.020
No, I wouldn't have started with a way lower number if I was going to do that.
01:55:37.400
I just don't see like, maybe because I said, once again, I'm older than you guys, basically
01:55:42.780
You just learn it's not really something, because you could say any number you want and people
01:55:48.800
are still going to be like, she could be lying, it could be higher, it could be less,
01:55:52.160
it could be whatever, so, but I just don't really, give a fuck, I'm 22 by 23 years old,
01:56:01.420
I really don't see anything concerning about that, but I don't know.
01:56:09.280
I think that's probably, I don't know if, I don't know if that's, I mean,
01:56:13.780
So, you probably talk, and when I say girlfriends, it's like female friends.
01:56:17.100
Like, are you about, are you commensurate, or, because I was going to say, at least for
01:56:22.200
this area, I think you're, at 22, you're a bit on the lower end.
01:56:26.380
Yeah, because I was in a relationship, a good part of college, so, like, I've only slept
01:56:29.840
with, I've slept with three different people since, like, the pandemic has started, since
01:56:34.380
before pandemic, so it's like, my, compared to my friends, especially my, like, bartending
01:56:38.560
friends, downtown friends, yeah, most of my girlfriends are, like,
01:56:43.780
Almost near the hundreds already, so that's why, like, yeah.
01:56:49.060
Like, almost, a lot of my friends are closer to 30.
01:56:52.120
I mean, the 100 number doesn't surprise me, because I know some women with 100-plus
01:56:56.380
I mean, I knew a 19-year-old chick, 100-plus body count.
01:57:00.820
I mean, UCSB, Santa Barbara, SBCC, Isla Vista, freshman women can rack up in the first freshman
01:57:14.200
quarter or semester or whatever it is, like, major numbers, so, yeah, that doesn't totally
01:57:20.800
So, I, just really curious, though, so, what would you say, for your age range, do you
01:57:27.500
Yeah, because you said you're a bit low, so do you think it's closer to, like, 20, 30?
01:57:30.580
I would say, yeah, for my age, like, to, like, 22, 25-year-olds, are usually around,
01:57:36.320
Like, most of my friends are between 30, 30, like, when we, like, like, a lot of us sat
01:57:39.820
down and wrote down every single name, the ones that they could remember, or, like, events,
01:57:43.040
time, and places, and they're all, yeah, the only ones, my only friends who have lower body
01:57:47.940
counts are the ones who never left their hometown.
01:57:52.680
And then I'll open this up to you guys, too, like, of your peer group of your friends or
01:57:57.780
women you know, like, would you, what would you say their body count is?
01:58:02.780
I mean, from, like, friends, I think I hear, like, a lot of, like, 7s, like, definitely
01:58:11.160
We don't really talk about it because, like, we don't care.
01:58:24.380
My friends and I talk about sex a lot, actually.
01:58:31.580
You don't have to name names, but what would you say, like, the average range, if you
01:58:36.580
had to guess, of either your peer group or kind of women in your age range?
01:58:41.420
I see that it, like, varies a lot from where you're from, I think, and, like, just, yeah,
01:58:47.080
Like, some people who are, like, near, like, party schools or something, they're probably
01:58:50.420
going to be higher just because they've been more exposed to, like, hookup culture.
01:59:06.020
Because, but, like, I talk to people who are not going to judge me.
01:59:13.980
And then, like, especially Japanese people are really judgmental, so I never talk about
01:59:26.620
So, I need to give my take on the whole body count thing because I need to come in here.
01:59:38.820
So, and I do think it's different between men and women because I don't think that there's
01:59:45.680
a symmetry between what women want in men and what men want in women.
01:59:51.280
Or the preferences, boundaries, and standards that men have are different than the ones
01:59:56.980
So, I think a big thing for men, and I think this has really been the case throughout all
02:00:03.280
of human history, and I still think, even to this day, men value sexual purity in women.
02:00:09.780
Now, purity could mean virginity, but it could also just mean not being a hoe, not being the
02:00:22.920
If there might be some men, you might have some guy friends who might say, I don't care
02:00:32.880
Like, for a long-term relationship, for marriage, most men are not going to want to marry the
02:00:39.240
They're not going to want to marry a woman who's, I mean, don't get me wrong.
02:00:44.000
There's plenty of simps out there that are going to accept you as you come, but most men
02:00:51.020
are going to have a very serious issue taking you seriously if you have a promiscuous past.
02:01:11.500
If you have a response to it, you're welcome to come in because, well, because my position
02:01:21.200
So, I don't know if you have a rebuttal or if you have an issue with anything I've just
02:01:30.920
So, I mean, there's a couple reasons why body count should matter.
02:01:33.460
However, it was already kind of brought up, there's the STD thing.
02:01:40.620
Someone who's more promiscuous is more likely to have an STD.
02:01:49.800
If you've slept with more people, it's not true.
02:01:52.940
It's not always directly tied because some people who sleep around a lot use protection
02:02:01.480
And yet, if you've only had one partner, you've only slept with one person, you can
02:02:10.440
But generally speaking, I would say the more sexual partners you've had, the likelihood
02:02:17.320
that you're going to get an STD or will have an STD is increased.
02:02:23.500
Yes, but there's so many factors that go into it that it's not just a direct correlation.
02:02:33.780
The higher your body count, the more partners you've had, the greater likelihood of getting
02:02:42.300
It's about, one, yeah, you can get an STD, but they might also just be more likely to
02:02:45.860
know they have an STD because they're getting more regularly checked.
02:02:50.340
They've been fucking for years and she goes two years without knowing she has chlamydia
02:02:53.160
because he cheated on her in the beginning of the relationship and she never thought to
02:03:00.840
But, I mean, if you had to compare the two, you're much...
02:03:05.300
I mean, if you're sleeping with three new people a week, the likelihood of you getting
02:03:10.900
an STD is going to be greater than if you're in a committed long-term relationship.
02:03:21.340
I'm not saying that it's impossible, but the exception does not make the rule.
02:03:28.400
But just even, like, not even just based on numbers research, even based on the people
02:03:31.460
I know, I, strangely enough, I don't know, not going for men, can only talk to many men
02:03:36.700
about it, but, like, one of the women I know, the less promiscuous they are, the bigger run-ins
02:03:43.780
So, that's the only reason why I'm saying that.
02:03:48.960
It can also just be from being out here and, for some reason, people in relationships get
02:03:54.420
tore up with STDs more often than people not, but I don't know.
02:03:58.500
I mean, and the other thing, too, is, I mean, yeah, you can say, well, I'll get STD tests,
02:04:02.860
but, I mean, most people, I'd say a vast majority of people are not getting full-panel STD tests.
02:04:12.580
Yeah, maybe, like, often if you ask to get STD tested, they're not testing for everything.
02:04:19.280
And then there's also some STDs that aren't going to show up until later on.
02:04:25.020
Or you're supposed to wait two to three weeks before or after your partner.
02:04:30.040
I mean, HIV, there's some other ones that can kind of show up much further down the road.
02:04:38.980
So, and also people are fucking without condoms.
02:04:46.140
Also, it's just, if someone, okay, so for me personally, the thought of sleeping with a new girl
02:04:53.720
and she's sleeping with another guy, I find that disgusting.
02:05:00.420
I'm going to hook up with you and you fucked a guy the night before.
02:05:06.760
So, if someone is promiscuous, that's more likely to be the case.
02:05:13.260
Whereas if you have a low body count, you only have sex with one person at a time, then...
02:05:18.260
But you're forgetting the people that they're introduced to, though.
02:05:23.020
So, like, say, yeah, it's nasty if you fucked this girl and the next day...
02:05:28.160
Or you, this girl got fucked yesterday and then you go fuck her tonight, right?
02:05:32.840
But what if you, so instead you choose the girl who you're like, oh, no, this girl, like,
02:05:58.560
Yeah, I mean, and I want to make it clear, women can also have a...
02:06:05.680
Maybe you guys know, like, kind of a naive girl who's maybe a bit inexperienced when it
02:06:11.100
Like, you probably wouldn't want to set her up with the player guy.
02:06:14.880
The guy who's, like, probably just going to hook up with her once.
02:06:18.200
Like, you wouldn't want to set her up with that kind of guy.
02:06:19.840
So, you'd maybe want to set her up with a guy who he himself isn't a big player guy.
02:06:28.200
So, I think it's perfectly reasonable for women to...
02:06:32.280
So, I don't want to make this seem like it's a double standard.
02:06:35.840
There certainly is a double standard, and some of it is, I would say, to some degree justified.
02:06:44.240
If they sleep with a lot of women, you're a stud.
02:06:47.740
Whereas if a woman sleeps with a lot of men, she's a slut.
02:06:51.840
I think that there are reasons for why that is.
02:06:54.460
One of the reasons would be it's far easier for women to get laid than it is for men to get laid.
02:07:03.660
Like, if a woman's like, I've slept with 100 men.
02:07:12.420
Any single girl here at this panel could walk outside this building right now and fuck a guy tonight if you were so inclined.
02:07:19.800
Either from a dating app, or you could probably just walk up to a dude on the street and say, hey, do you want to fuck?
02:07:26.060
And the guy's going to be like, okay, let's go.
02:07:29.320
Most guys are like, no guy can really pull that off.
02:07:41.320
Yes, it's more difficult for a man to get laid.
02:07:43.280
But especially being a bartender out here, like, I see women throw themselves.
02:07:46.020
Like, I literally, no offense to all of us, we're obviously not.
02:07:49.780
But, like, Santa Barbara, I La Vista, it's, like, kind of a sea of a lot of easy women.
02:07:55.240
That's why when there is creep men out here, I'm like, bro, there's so many easy options out here.
02:07:58.760
Like, you really got to go creep on somebody who doesn't want you.
02:08:00.500
And I can look at five girls right now who, if you bought them one drink, would go home with you in an instant.
02:08:05.960
Like, they're, that's why their body counts are so high.
02:08:09.160
Because it's easy for them, too, and they just do it.
02:08:12.480
Well, I would say women are kind of easy for very attractive men.
02:08:20.440
I mean, it's different because I'm in a place of alcohol.
02:08:24.620
But, you don't have to, as long as you don't, I think the bigger thing about men is not even attractive level.
02:08:30.260
Is as long as you don't stink, look like a creep or a weirdo, and you're just, like, not a mess, then.
02:08:42.880
Like, there's easy dudes, there's easy girls, and a lot of them meet on the weekends at the club I work at, and I watch her go down.
02:08:49.840
I'm not, I'm, yeah, I mean, I'm sure that there's a ton, there are tons of hookups going on, whether out here in Isla Vista at a party or downtown at the bars and clubs.
02:08:59.000
Because, of course, people are hooking up willy-nilly.
02:09:01.620
I mean, I'm not sure, though, how much you're paying attention, but it's, is it plausible that these people are, already know each other?
02:09:15.880
But it's usually just because they're really drunk.
02:09:17.020
I think it's, alcohol is the main verdict half the time.
02:09:20.880
But, no, yeah, like, these, yeah, it's not as hard for men as I realized, especially going downtown.
02:09:29.100
It's, it's pretty hard still for guys to get laid.
02:09:31.660
Maybe if you want to do it in a sensible way, like, in a respectable manner, sure.
02:09:35.340
But if you don't care, and you're just really trying to get laid, go up to any girl who's not a 10, get her two drinks.
02:09:45.260
I think we should just, like, stop saying, like, they're easy.
02:09:48.420
I think, like, it's just some people are more willing to have sex.
02:09:52.840
And also, like, well, it's just, like, it's really, like, not, like, oh, they're easy, they're a slut, they have, like, a high body count and stuff.
02:10:01.140
It's just, like, some people, like, when you get to a certain age, you, like, have just experienced, like, a lot of things, like, a lot of sex, whatever.
02:10:08.220
And so you're at the stage where it's easy, where it's, like, more simple, and you don't have to, like, think about it a lot.
02:10:16.260
I mean, like, at our age, I think it's kind of hard to say, like, yeah, like, every day I'd be open to sex because, I mean, there's a lot of factors playing into it.
02:10:24.220
Like, a lot of girls my age are still looking for, like, that, like, perfect, like, boy, like, that are going to, like, sweep them off their feet and, like, fall in love.
02:10:32.660
And then there's some people who have, like, just been in the game for a while, and they're at the position where they feel mature enough to feel like they can have sex.
02:10:40.620
Like, yeah, but I think I get it because it's, like, the whole terminology thing, like, you know, slut-shaming, like, not trying to do that and stuff.
02:10:48.080
But, like, it just comes down to it is there's some people who are easier to sleep with, and there's some people that are harder.
02:10:53.680
Some people, you just need to give them a drink or you just need to say hello, hi.
02:10:56.900
And there's some people who you need to take them out on dates or you need to do that.
02:10:59.260
It's not, it's just because easy has a negative connotation to it.
02:11:02.300
But it's plain and simple, it's easier to fuck them than it is easier than maybe to fuck you, you know?
02:11:09.340
There are some people, I mean, on the whole, using the word easy, there are some people where it's easier to have sex with them than someone else.
02:11:22.940
It's just, you know, you can help Sarah if you want a quick night or you can help...
02:11:38.800
So, but you were saying that you see a lot of people hooking up at the bars, thus, what?
02:11:46.120
So, because what I was saying was it's very difficult for men to get laid, fairly difficult for men to get laid.
02:11:59.380
Any single one of you could download Tinder tonight and fuck a guy tonight.
02:12:11.180
Like, even really top-tier men are not going to be able to just get on Tinder.
02:12:18.720
Now, if he's really attractive, he might be able to set it up the next day, in a couple days, whatever.
02:12:23.560
But it's not going to be as on-demand as it is for women.
02:12:29.140
Bro, okay, if I got to set up a date with a girl, maybe it's next week.
02:12:35.920
And then it's probably not going to happen that night.
02:12:39.200
I know a lot of you said the three-day rule, right?
02:12:41.220
It's going to be on the third date, so maybe two to three weeks down the line.
02:12:48.120
And then there's a 50% chance she's going to flake an hour before.
02:12:59.320
By the way, I wanted to let you guys know, I fully encourage you guys, if you disagree
02:13:10.340
with me, I'm not going to be offended if you disagree, if you want to debate me.
02:13:23.800
I agree with what you're saying, but, like, it seems like guys have it easier where we
02:13:39.360
The rest of the panel, do you guys agree that it's here in Santa Barbara, California,
02:13:48.700
Like, it's easier, because we're in a college environment, and a lot of girls...
02:13:53.800
Girls also want to hook up with people, and boys have a higher chance with going and
02:14:01.580
All they really have to do is, like, have some confidence, do a little conversation.
02:14:14.660
Not like that, but just, like, go talk to a girl.
02:14:20.960
If you just go talk to a girl and you're sweet, usually, like...
02:14:26.480
Like, especially in college, and there's, like, always alcohol and parties.
02:14:30.600
It wouldn't be that hard for, like, two people to start, like, getting laid.
02:14:44.780
Santa Barbara, the mystical land where men can get laid easier than women.
02:14:49.820
I don't want to say they're easier than most locations for them.
02:14:58.760
Okay, so I don't disagree with you that Santa Barbara, it's easier to get laid than in Idaho.
02:15:10.320
Like, I would even say that it's easier for a man to get laid here than it is, like...
02:15:17.560
Maybe if you're a celebrity or a basketball player for, like, a regular Schmegular, though, in L.A.
02:15:24.080
It would probably be easier for him here than...
02:15:26.980
Because I swear to God, like, my coworkers, I have a lot of male coworkers, I see them go home with different girls all night, almost nightly.
02:15:40.700
Like, these girls, like, there's so many girls, not every girl, obviously, but there's so many girls who, like, at the end of the night, they have drinks, and they want to hook up, too.
02:15:50.660
And it's very common out here, because it is, I think, shamed a little bit less than it is in other areas.
02:15:57.260
Like, if I tell my girls, like, or if I tell, like, I'm gonna get a high five, you know?
02:16:02.100
If I was like, oh, yeah, I hooked up with someone last night.
02:16:03.560
At other places, you might be like, oh, like, do you know him?
02:16:06.560
Like, nobody really gives a fuck about that here.
02:16:09.100
Like, definitely, there's a lot higher status men in, like, say, Los Angeles or Miami.
02:16:16.340
The girls, they want a fucking Dolphins player, a guy who makes 100K.
02:16:23.380
But I do want to kind of stick to the question of, between men and women, who has it easier?
02:16:33.700
You thought it was easier for men to get women?
02:16:49.580
And I need to kind of bring it back to the body count thing.
02:16:56.480
So if you have a high body count, if you're promiscuous, if you sleep with a lot of people,
02:17:07.740
if you engage in casual sex, you are rewiring your brain towards short-term pleasure-seeking.
02:17:17.560
It's more exciting to just continually be sleeping with the next hot guy, next hot guy, next hot guy.
02:17:28.900
The sex is better in a long-term relationship for a few reasons.
02:17:32.860
One, if you guys have that emotional connection.
02:17:35.360
If you're in love, I think the sex is going to be better.
02:17:39.720
On a physical level, you guys just know what each other...
02:17:50.540
You know, on a one-night stand, you're not going to bust out some super kinky shit, probably.
02:17:54.180
So you can definitely explore kinks in a long-term relationship.
02:18:04.780
With one person, if you've been seeing them for a while in a long-term relationship.
02:18:09.040
But I think it's more exciting the first few times with a new partner.
02:18:14.180
So you're kind of rewiring your brain a bit in the same way that if you've been scrolling
02:18:20.700
on TikTok for three hours and then you try to sit down and read a book, that shit's going
02:18:30.680
You're basically destroying your attention span, so to speak.
02:18:43.420
Okay, if you have a high body count, it makes it more difficult for you to pair bond with
02:18:47.940
So if you sleep with a lot of people, you're going to have a greater likelihood that you're
02:18:53.680
not going to be able to properly bond with a person.
02:18:57.980
If you've slept with 50 people, you're not going to be able to bond with number 51.
02:19:06.500
You've like almost destroyed your ability to pair bond.
02:19:10.580
And at 100, like, you're probably thoroughly screwed.
02:19:21.440
Someone who's promiscuous, who has a high body count, is...
02:19:29.200
There's a greater risk of infidelity if someone's promiscuous.
02:19:32.520
Greater likelihood that the relationship is going to break up.
02:19:36.140
Greater likelihood of divorce if you're married.
02:19:40.040
People who have more partners, they're more likely to report relationship or marriage
02:20:06.420
Oh, I'm just going to say, yeah, that's absolutely true.
02:20:10.280
If you know that you can get instant pleasure, like, from a hookup culture, like, it's going
02:20:13.800
to be harder for you to, like, slow down and, like, really connect with someone.
02:20:18.340
And plus, just, like, if both parties are just, like, willing to have sex, then, like,
02:20:22.800
you, like, can kind of, like, gaslight yourself into believing, like, that's, like, physical
02:20:30.960
So, yeah, I feel like it is, like, harder for people who have, like, just, like, been
02:20:38.460
Because it's just, like, you know, like, I've been doing this at work.
02:20:42.800
I mean, like, obviously, you're going to get bored eventually.
02:20:45.420
Like, when you, like, get older, I feel like, probably.
02:21:05.220
We get dopamine from, you know, the quick, basically, quick satisfaction.
02:21:10.020
And that dopamine rush is kind of just going to get boring at some point for, I guess, I
02:21:18.660
For women release oxytocin and feel more attachment after sex.
02:21:30.600
But for a woman, I think, biologically speaking, it might be a bit overwhelming if you feel that
02:21:35.700
attachment towards a lot of, if you sleep with a lot of people or simply you just got
02:21:40.200
into the habit and, like, you can kind of almost consciously, oh, yeah, I'm attached,
02:21:45.900
This is just, like, what I'm feeling in the moment.
02:21:49.080
Well, yeah, that's what I mean by pair bonding.
02:21:51.240
So if you're consistently just hooking up with a bunch of people, you are desensitizing
02:21:57.820
And you're just not going to be able to properly pair with somebody.
02:22:06.960
Well, that's why I said earlier when you first asked the question.
02:22:10.600
That's why I think, like, yeah, somebody with a body count of three probably shouldn't be
02:22:19.620
But also, like, when you mentioned the whole, like, infidelity, things like that, I think
02:22:23.080
that a big part of that is too many people trying to, like, stay into traditions and, like,
02:22:29.760
things like that when really they should be more of a polyamorous or, you know, not tied
02:22:34.600
down or a vibe like that, but they're trying to force themselves into, like, what's the
02:22:39.280
And then that just leads to more, because, like, yeah, some people are just more promiscuous
02:22:46.160
Oh, like, I was kind of, like, experienced because I was being hook-up culture.
02:22:53.300
And then after that, like, I was, like, what am I doing, you know?
02:23:07.180
And then there is nothing, like, there is no meaningful.
02:23:10.940
That's why I was, like, oh, I should change and then, like, I should have sex with a guy
02:23:16.360
who I, like, yeah, that's, like, I'm not going to say my body count, but, like, I have
02:23:40.320
I'm not super impressed about it, but I kind of let, I let a lot slide in the chat, but I
02:23:46.960
do want you guys to try to, you know, try not to say anything too mean about the girls
02:23:51.600
and nothing, like, overly offensive because I don't want to get, I don't want the girls
02:24:00.480
And then also, I don't want accusations levied against me because I'm not moderating chat.
02:24:07.780
So, I'm, as far as free speech goes, I'm pretty, you know, I let a lot slide.
02:24:12.940
We don't have much chat moderation, but, you know, guys, don't be, don't be overly toxic.
02:24:22.040
But, you know, don't, don't go, don't go crazy guys.
02:24:28.300
So we were talking about it's easier, but it's okay.
02:24:30.720
You guys, you're saying it's easier for, for women.
02:24:37.540
Cause there was initial pushback, but now you guys are saying, and women have it kind
02:24:48.700
So dating is easier for women or are we talking just getting laid?
02:25:00.540
I think from like, from friends experiences and everything, I think it's easier for a
02:25:06.300
woman to get laid, but relationship wise, like you barely, like for guys, if they get
02:25:30.780
I think, well, I think men take breakups far harder than do women.
02:25:34.740
Men get fucking crushed by breakups, destroyed.
02:25:40.420
We're cool for like a week and then we're like, fuck.
02:25:52.240
It's delayed when they're bored and lonely and realize they couldn't get into another
02:25:57.860
Also, it's just the way that like the two different genders process trauma and hurt because
02:26:03.180
for women, we oftentimes have a lot of emotional support around us from our friends and stuff.
02:26:08.660
But for guys, you don't see them going around to their boys and saying, oh, I just got dumped
02:26:13.680
For them, like all they get mostly from their guy friends from the boys is just, oh, yeah,
02:26:18.520
whatever, just move on, like to go find some other girl.
02:26:20.740
But for girls, when you talk to our, like when we talk to our friends, we really do have
02:26:24.940
a lot of support and we have a lot of deep and thorough conversations about processing
02:26:30.760
And so that burden is kind of spread out a little bit.
02:26:32.900
Whereas for guys, it's not and they really handle it themselves and they want to look
02:26:37.980
So for like the first period of time, like no one knows about it, but then all of a sudden
02:26:49.420
I think, and that's why men, if you think about it, there's research done, which is really
02:26:54.340
interesting, saying that men never really get over their breakups, which is really sad
02:26:58.220
because the way they've been conditioned to process their trauma is, well, not to process
02:27:04.120
So, you know, oftentimes you will just hear from friends, like I'm like seeing this guy
02:27:09.540
and he's still talking about this girl or I have this guy friend and he's still talking
02:27:14.160
Well, because it takes so much time because they never had the chance to actually sit,
02:27:20.880
I think that's a healthier way to do it instead of then dumping it on another girl and then
02:27:25.540
kind of just like repeating that process all over again.
02:27:28.260
And I really don't know how far you can take it.
02:27:43.020
Eric, if you can go ahead and pull up a video, we're going to react to a gentleman.
02:27:51.440
Everyone's favorite fan or favorite man, sorry.
02:28:02.320
Go ahead and pull up the videos tab and we're going to watch the body count.
02:28:12.740
You know what's so attractive about younger women?
02:28:14.780
Because a lot of these dudes talk about fertility and looks and stuff.
02:28:19.720
I think that in the modern world, in the days of old, right, you'd meet a woman, you'd get
02:28:24.780
In the modern world, if I meet a girl who's 33 and single, I know the amount of dick that's
02:28:29.200
been through her before me is just simply unattractive.
02:28:32.140
I don't care how nice you are, but you're 33 years old.
02:28:36.300
If I get a 19-year-old girl, I might be her second or third man, right?
02:28:40.940
And all the trauma and heartbreak and bullshit they put you through, you're going to try and
02:28:46.120
Like, well, if my last man cheated, I don't give a fuck.
02:28:50.920
So if you pick up older women, you have to accept they've been on the carousel longer.
02:28:58.720
And when I see a beautiful young woman, I know that she has a very low body count.
02:29:01.840
And also, no, but the truth is this, women's mentality is absolutely connected to sex.
02:29:08.060
If a woman sleeps with a bunch of men, it's harder to penetrate her mind and make her fall
02:29:13.900
But if she's had 30 dudes inside of her, is she really going to think, you know what,
02:29:19.080
Or is she going to think, you know what, he talked to me real?
02:29:21.220
Whereas if a woman's only been with a few guys, she's much more likely to fall in love with
02:29:24.600
The likelihood of her falling completely in love with you and staying loyal to you and really
02:29:28.900
believing you're the only man for her after being through so much trauma
02:29:31.740
and so many men and sleeping with so many dudes and having her heart broken and having
02:29:35.220
those memories of her ex and all that crap she's been through is far less likely than
02:29:38.960
meeting a nice, young, beautiful girl who hasn't been with many men.
02:29:41.260
And she goes, you know what, this is the guy, I like him.
02:29:43.600
Every woman who knows this and every man who watches this can be honest.
02:29:45.780
Women fall in love with the person they lose their virginity to or the second or third
02:29:50.220
Any woman who slept with 50 dudes, she doesn't even remember who most of them are.
02:29:53.220
If a woman slept with a bunch of men before you, she's less likely to stick it out through a
02:29:57.040
She's more likely to just say, you know what, new answers, new did.
02:30:01.860
If I meet a beautiful 30-year-old woman, I'm not saying I won't sleep with her.
02:30:17.420
It's just always so funny to me, like, how he blatantly says, like, yeah, like, he's just
02:30:22.120
admitting that one, either his dick is hella small or not good, or his, like, personality
02:30:27.620
and everything is so trashed that a woman who has encountered more than three men just
02:30:33.920
I mean, give yourself a better fighting shot, bud.
02:30:36.340
Like, you're just shitting on yourself, honestly, when you break it down.
02:30:42.000
Because he's saying, oh, a 19-year-old has only slept with three men, so, you know, she's
02:30:47.520
Like, what, you're scared of a woman that's seen more than three penises is going to look
02:30:50.240
at yours and be like, shit, I know there's better than that out there.
02:30:54.500
If you were packing or something, I don't think you'd care how many she had.
02:30:57.300
So he's just showing how, like, you know, not only little dick energy, but, like, probably
02:31:02.180
actually, like, seriously a little dick in there.
02:31:09.960
I mean, I don't think men or just, like, anyone should assume someone's body count based on
02:31:17.180
Like, a 19-year-old can have, like, 50 bodies, while a 30-year-old can have, like, two.
02:31:26.560
But how much will that 19-year-old with 50 bodies have by the time she's 30?
02:31:37.300
Others can just, like, keep it at, like, a steady number, I guess.
02:31:41.960
But, yeah, I just don't think people should assume body counts and all that.
02:31:51.560
Like, a woman who's 19, she could have, he's obviously not living in Santa Barbara, could
02:31:59.960
And a woman who's in her 30s, she could have a handful.
02:32:07.540
And, like, just because your body count is 30 doesn't mean that, like, she's not going
02:32:22.600
I don't think it, you should say that they're not going to stay with you just because your
02:32:34.900
Because you were saying how, like, the body count does matter.
02:32:40.780
Can you tilt the microphone down towards you just a bit?
02:32:55.100
It just depends on the guy and the girl and if they like each other and if they're going
02:33:00.240
I'm just trying to remember what I said about how it's different for the men and the women,
02:33:11.900
Are you referencing the double standard, how men are viewed as studs if they sleep with
02:33:19.640
When you were saying that, like, I don't really remember exactly what you were saying, but I
02:33:24.860
agreed with it and now I'm, like, taking it back a little bit because I'm, like,
02:33:30.240
just because her body count is 30 doesn't mean she's not going to be loyal to you.
02:33:35.240
Basically, because he was saying that she's not going to be.
02:33:40.500
But it depends if he likes her and she likes him.
02:33:45.580
Is it possible that a woman who slept with 100 men could be loyal to you?
02:33:53.560
But, like, you know, we all sort of look to the people we're potentially going to partner
02:34:03.160
You know, we're not going to do a full, thorough background check and, you know, before, I mean,
02:34:10.400
But so one of the ways that men make a judgment about women is were they promiscuous in the
02:34:19.060
And we're going to infer certain things about them.
02:34:27.660
So it's not certainly a woman who's had slept with 100 men.
02:34:34.640
But if I'm a betting man, I'm going to bet against it.
02:34:43.060
I just think so much of this conversation is about, like, looking down at women for whatever
02:34:50.560
And whereas for guys, it's almost, it's just entirely the opposite.
02:34:54.540
Like, you don't see another figure like Andrew Tate going, like, a woman like Andrew Tate
02:34:59.140
going around talking about how high her body count is.
02:35:03.340
How, like, her body count, how her own body count is.
02:35:06.400
Because Andrew Tate's going around talking about how many girls she slept with, how many
02:35:11.100
But you don't get that for the girls because it's like for guys, it's okay.
02:35:21.120
I mean, I did, I did go around the table and ask a few of you omitted answering the body
02:35:33.860
Wait, if a woman's body count is too low, it's a problem.
02:35:37.680
Isn't that like a thing two guys would think that, oh, she doesn't know what she's doing.
02:35:49.940
I've definitely seen like TikToks where the guy would be like, oh, she has like lower body
02:35:56.980
That's fucking weird for a guy to be like, no, no guy is going to be like, gee, I really
02:36:08.920
If for even for a one night stand for most, for most men, they're going to be like virgin.
02:36:16.980
If they had the option, if she was down virgin versus the girl with 30 bodies.
02:36:23.120
But then realistically, usually like when the girl has like little to no experience,
02:36:30.460
It's always like, if it's too little, it's a problem.
02:36:34.680
Even for just a hookup though, given the, given the option, assuming they're both equally
02:36:45.140
Give us the girl with one body or zero over the girl with 30.
02:36:49.220
Isn't that concerning to you that you guys think that way?
02:36:54.280
Well, it's like for me personally, I would rather like, kind of like what they were saying
02:36:57.240
about the guys, like, yeah, like if I find out a dude's a virgin or like one body, I'm
02:37:02.480
like, I'm not going to probably want to waste my time teaching.
02:37:04.960
Because the sex is going to be bad potentially.
02:37:07.480
Yes, and I'm not even trying to take this to a weird place.
02:37:09.360
That's why I kind of regret even opening my mouth.
02:37:13.400
Yes, but like, you don't, you don't see the, like, am I the only one that's like
02:37:21.360
Men want virginity, virgins, no dick inside of you.
02:37:31.140
Like they don't want somebody else peeing on their tree.
02:37:38.340
But we kind of talked about how we wouldn't go there.
02:37:47.900
Just, just guys having a preference for their partner?
02:37:53.080
Guys having a preference for women to be as close to prepubescent as possible.
02:38:01.840
No, no, no, no, but okay, we're speaking within the context of adult women.
02:38:09.020
Oh, I'm not saying, I'm not saying child at all.
02:38:11.420
Adult women, but the men who go for adult women are still trying to make them as prepubescent
02:38:20.480
18, 19, 20, or 21-year-old adult woman can be a virgin.
02:38:24.440
I, that's not, you're not getting what I'm saying.
02:38:25.940
I'm saying those women, yes, they are grown women, but there's a lot of problem with men
02:38:30.440
trying to go for women as close to being a child as possible.
02:38:36.460
Okay, so you're talking like age gap relationships.
02:38:40.800
It could still be a 20-year-old and a 20-year-old, but that 20-year-old dude is going for a 20-year-old
02:38:44.960
girlfriend who, if we looked close, if you just look past her, she might look like
02:38:50.240
Well, I don't think, I mean, if she's of age, if she's 18 or 19, I don't think we should,
02:38:54.740
some, some women have younger features, I guess.
02:38:58.280
That's not, I know, but I'm saying it's, it's sought after, like the whole virginity
02:39:01.340
thing, like never been touched by a man before, never had a penis inside of her, like I want
02:39:06.000
her completely hairless, no hair, nothing, never been touched by a man, you know what
02:39:10.180
I kind of see, no, I see where you're, I see where you're going, I see where you're going,
02:39:16.380
but I mean, I, he, I, what I'm saying, what Andrew Tate is saying is adult women, right?
02:39:24.660
Yes, virginity or low body count is something that we value.
02:39:30.860
Okay, you wanted to kind of, I think, yeah, I think there definitely are people like where
02:39:35.260
you're, the realm you're getting into and that's kind of like a different thing, but
02:39:38.120
I think like a lot of it has to do with like what you like get from someone who like isn't,
02:39:44.680
who's a virgin, it's kind of just like, it's like, like I don't, like a lot of people just
02:39:50.660
have insecurities and like when people like have lower body counts or something or like
02:39:55.380
higher body counts, you just like want to be like something to them, like you want to
02:39:59.920
When people have like higher body counts, it's kind of like, like I, like what I see like
02:40:04.200
sometimes like people just like want to be like the best out of it, like I think there's
02:40:07.680
like territorial aspects too, I think there's a lot of aspects of just like people wanting
02:40:12.140
to like be something important, be something special.
02:40:16.700
I think like that's some, how guys, like I know there's some weird guys that are like
02:40:20.280
really fetishize like the thing if like you're a virgin because it's just like, oh, like I
02:40:24.280
got you for, it's like you're collecting like your Pokemons or whatever, like I got, like
02:40:29.500
But I think like the same thing for girls, like, like if you get with a guy who's a virgin,
02:40:35.280
you're also a virgin, it's kind of like this special bond, like because like you guys are
02:40:39.100
like, you know, like figuring things out together, so it can kind of like go both ways.
02:40:43.560
Obviously, I don't think, like I think Andrew Tate is stupid, like pretty much like that's
02:40:50.100
But like I, like I get what it, like what people are saying, like if a girl wants, you know,
02:40:55.720
if a girl's a virgin wants to be with a guy who's a virgin too, like, you know, like you,
02:41:00.280
like there's nothing to judge, like it makes sense, or it's like just like an emotional
02:41:05.420
I want to add on, like isn't it problematic that we're basing people like and their worth
02:41:13.300
Like are you going to truly form a meaningful relationship if this is what you care about?
02:41:17.880
Like shouldn't you be focusing on like, oh, what this person values?
02:41:21.400
And okay, this might sound like cliche, but isn't it true?
02:41:24.220
Like are you truly going to like form, like and one night stand, okay, I understand, but
02:41:28.720
like if you're planning to, you know, take a serious relationship or get in one, like
02:41:33.680
if this is what you're concerned about, I don't really know if you're going to have something
02:41:40.600
Or if you're ready for a relationship at all, if that's what you care about.
02:41:44.800
So you're saying that someone who would be concerned about their partner's past sexual
02:41:51.120
exploits or promiscuity is not emotionally or mentally, like they're not in the right
02:42:05.620
What about highly religious people that they're waiting until marriage to get married, they
02:42:09.720
want to be their virgin, they want a partner that's a virgin.
02:42:12.160
So to them, being with a partner that has a low body count or who has no body count in
02:42:22.920
I think you misinterpreted me for a little bit.
02:42:26.140
I think more of like the extent to which we're spending time on this conversation currently
02:42:30.740
and to way like the extent Andrew Tate talks about it.
02:42:33.480
And I understand like the topic of this, but I think if you care about it so much, like
02:42:38.900
that this is like such a priority, maybe take a step back.
02:42:44.600
I'm saying it's maybe not as valuable as we're making it out to be, of course, and to
02:42:52.500
But, you know, just take it into consideration.
02:42:54.900
Well, I would say that I think for men, men care about body count more than women care
02:43:02.160
pounded, men are more interested in this than women are.
02:43:06.700
So I think most, a lot of women like probably don't care.
02:43:12.540
And it kind of comes back to, well, something we sort of touched on is that I think women
02:43:18.080
sort of value men who are a bit more experienced and a guy who's a bit more experienced, whether
02:43:22.100
that be in the bedroom or just relationship wise.
02:43:25.120
So the thing, the fact, the thing is, is that men and women are attracted to different
02:43:30.520
We, men have different preferences than do women.
02:43:35.520
There, there are some where there's a, there's some preferences, standards, or boundaries
02:43:39.960
that both men and women share, but there are also asymmetries too.
02:43:48.060
Well, I just think like the biggest part of like what I find like is like Andrew Tate's
02:43:57.280
For him to like, just be like, you know, like saying like all this, like at 35, like it.
02:44:10.420
I'm just saying like, it's just like, you know, you're 35, you probably had sexual experiences.
02:44:15.520
Like, it's like kind of just stupid to like judge women at 35 for having a body count.
02:44:20.840
I feel like when we were young, like if you're like 16, like I think like we definitely go
02:44:25.240
into a lot of things like looking at how many people have been, like how many people that
02:44:31.660
Like we don't like, we don't understand like the complexities of body count, sexuality,
02:44:38.180
But when you're like that, like when you're that age and like you can't like see it like
02:44:43.340
from like a unit, like a whole like general thing, it's kind of just like a little scary
02:44:48.900
because it's just like, you know, you've seen more than an 18 year old, but like you're like,
02:44:56.560
Like there's like more things to judge like someone on their body count at that age.
02:45:01.660
Well, I think that's why he, in the very beginning of the video, he says, he talks about body
02:45:07.240
count too, but he also talks about wanting to date younger women.
02:45:12.260
So I think he's saying I would, if I had a choice, I'd rather date someone who was 19,
02:45:19.620
20, 21 versus a woman in closer to his age, like in his thirties.
02:45:24.840
I don't think a lot of guys can pull that off, but I think for Andrew Tate, who's incredibly
02:45:59.580
So, uh, I don't think, did we, we were going around the table on this and then I think I
02:46:11.260
Did everyone get to give their reaction to the video?
02:46:24.260
So for the video, I think Andrew Tate just saying how somebody wouldn't be loyal to him
02:46:34.600
But what if, the thing is, what if he, he, I, what if he has a high body count?
02:46:42.280
So he does, he, it is a double standard for him.
02:46:45.760
But like, but the other person that he's interested in doesn't care that he has a high body count
02:46:52.880
But he's just very like, it's, it's just the double standard.
02:47:01.620
Because it would, I'm not saying it's justified, but if somebody has like a really low body count
02:47:09.060
and they're talking to somebody who has like a hundred plus body counts, like let's say
02:47:13.480
that person has under 10, they want somebody that has like the same amount as them, but
02:47:17.520
they're not going to like, you know, full on judge them off of them having that many
02:47:25.940
And even though he is also in the same standard.
02:47:32.700
I think you can just like get a lot, like there's like definitely a lot of projected
02:47:36.160
insecurities when like your big issue is someone's body count.
02:47:39.780
Like it's kind of like, like why, like why is it so important?
02:47:44.860
I mean, like if you really like someone and their body count is high, like, like there's
02:47:50.680
always like the discussion of just like, you know, like who have you been with and stuff
02:47:53.980
and like, and you'll kind of get like a feel of like why it is.
02:47:56.540
Like some people are just like better with like having sex like natural and it's not like
02:47:59.900
they don't get like a lot of like emotional repercussions.
02:48:02.980
Like I've definitely like had those conversations.
02:48:06.320
It's just like, oh, like, you know, like what were you doing?
02:48:11.740
But I feel like from him, his like own, his like main focus is your body count.
02:48:15.940
And like, that's definitely like a projected insecurity because it's just like maybe he's
02:48:23.600
He's going to be like, like compared to all these people you've been with, like, of course
02:48:26.860
like he might be looking at just like he wants like a pure girl, but it's like he's not a
02:48:31.520
So it's just like, why are you saying something?
02:48:36.340
Well, I think it all, it just sort of comes back to there's asymmetries in what men and women
02:48:46.300
And by the way, he does focus on the body count.
02:49:02.480
He, he does care about body count, but you probably don't want to hear the other shit
02:49:08.420
He's got a lot of other preferences and standards for women.
02:49:20.740
So you're saying how, why is it such a, like a big focus?
02:49:25.720
If this is such a big focus for you, then like, shouldn't there be other things that
02:49:30.260
But for men, like a lot of men and a lot of men are not going to, even if you ask your
02:49:36.400
A lot of men are not going to be able to be honest with you about these sorts of things
02:49:40.500
because like most men, if they were to be a hundred percent honest with their preferences,
02:49:45.520
standards, or boundaries, it's going to be met with some sort of contempt or shaming
02:49:50.640
language, or you're going to be viewed as either insecure or small dick.
02:49:58.960
You're a misogynist or an incel, whatever it may be.
02:50:00.820
It's always going to be met with some sort of derision, disdain, or some sort of contempt.
02:50:05.460
So, men are not able in today's day and age to be honest about their preferences, standards,
02:50:21.340
Unless their standards are something that's illegal, then I don't see who's judging them
02:50:29.640
If most men were to be upfront about like what they want, it's going to like,
02:50:35.460
a lot of girls are going to be like, not going to want to fuck with him.
02:50:45.480
So, for me and for a lot of men, we really don't care about a woman's career.
02:50:56.280
If you were to tell a girl that, I think a lot of girls are going to have an issue.
02:51:00.060
If you told me you don't care what my career is?
02:51:05.380
Oh, like if I'm talking about my career and you straight up say you don't care what I'm
02:51:08.600
But if a guy says, listen, it's great that you make your own money, but I really...
02:51:21.860
A guy who's a lawyer who's making $250,000 a year, he's a litigation attorney, he'll date
02:51:35.260
But what I'd say is to that is that most women who are very successful, have a good career,
02:51:41.380
you're going to want to date a guy who's on your level or higher.
02:51:47.980
...as a woman, you're going to be looking, okay, I want to date a doctor.
02:51:50.620
I want to date someone who's making as much money as you or has some high-value career,
02:51:57.120
you're not going to go date the 19-year-old barista at Starbucks.
02:52:07.520
My point is that there's asymmetries in what men and women find attractive.
02:52:11.280
And I think that if guys were to say, oh, well, that's great that you're a marketing director
02:52:15.940
at whatever company, like, it doesn't make you as a woman more attractive is what I'm
02:52:25.040
I think a lot of women would be like, well, I would...
02:52:29.760
I think what a lot of women do is they look at the male metric of attraction.
02:52:33.980
What are traits or things that I would find attractive in a partner?
02:52:37.640
Okay, ambitious, successful, high-earner, et cetera, et cetera.
02:52:41.360
I mean, I know a lot of you guys are in college, so you're probably not hyper-focused at this
02:52:48.740
But I think as you start to get a bit older, you're going to start looking at, is this person
02:52:54.820
So finances do become a bit more of a factor as you get a bit older.
02:52:59.080
This is a fairly young panel, so it might not be making...
02:53:04.340
I might not be totally making sense at this point, but...
02:53:06.820
Yeah, that makes sense, especially like the first date thing.
02:53:09.660
Are you saying that men don't really value ambition and drive, then?
02:53:15.160
We value positive characteristics in women, but I would say that a woman who's ambitious,
02:53:30.860
Now, if you're coming to us and you have $200,000 in debt and you're a bum, like, you should
02:53:42.160
If you're in, like, dire financial situation, that's not a great look.
02:53:46.000
But, like, whether you're making $40,000 a year or you're a hyper-successful, you know,
02:53:54.840
whatever it is, you're doing $250,000 a year, or you have your own business, you're making
02:53:58.880
seven figures a year, most men are not really going to look at that and be like, whoa, that's
02:54:05.880
So, yeah, I don't think men are particularly...
02:54:10.380
Like, also, I would say the other thing is, is, like, I would say most men don't care if...
02:54:15.160
You hear a lot of women say, I want a guy who's funny.
02:54:36.800
I have a list written down if you guys want to.
02:54:41.760
But before I tell you the list, I'd like to just go around the table really quick.
02:54:48.000
Is there a preference, standard, or boundary that you guys think men have that you take
02:54:59.460
It could be a physical trait, or it could be a personality trait, characteristic.
02:55:03.740
For example, the body count thing could be one of them.
02:55:06.760
You would say, oh, I have an issue with a guy who has a high body count.
02:55:10.120
I would have an issue with a guy who has an issue with a woman who has a high body count.
02:55:14.620
Or, you could say, you could have an issue with a guy who, there's a certain physical thing.
02:55:27.420
Is there a preference, standard, or boundary that men have for women that you think is problematic
02:55:34.660
I know body count's probably an obvious one for some of you, but...
02:55:43.360
I think when guys only want to date girls that are, like, much younger than them, because
02:55:47.120
it has to do with, you know, control and dominance when the girl, clearly, like, when they're
02:55:51.220
much younger, don't really know what's going on yet.
02:55:54.800
They're too young, so they're being manipulated.
02:56:00.700
Because what are you trying to achieve from that?
02:56:02.320
Like, you're trying to manipulate and control them.
02:56:04.120
Well, I mean, heaven forbid a man find a woman who's at her peak physical attractiveness
02:56:15.940
Well, so, I mean, and they've done studies on this, but overwhelmingly, men find women
02:56:22.260
between the ages of 18 and 25 the most attractive.
02:56:38.400
For women, it kind of, like, matches up closer to their age.
02:56:42.200
But men, as far as what they find physically attractive...
02:57:03.060
So, when women reach 35 years old, they're starting to get into high-risk pregnancy age range.
02:57:10.340
And then, by the time they're, like, getting into their 40s, 45, the likelihood that a woman can get pregnant is very minuscule or just nonexistent.
02:57:24.220
We are attracted to women who are younger because women who are younger, who have indicators of youth, they are more fertile.
02:57:34.260
In the same way that women are attracted to tall men or physically large men, it's evolutionary.
02:57:41.040
It's because men who are tall or physically large are more capable of protecting you and more capable of providing for you.
02:57:47.840
And this goes back to our fucking caveman days, you know, where you wanted a big partner who was physically large because someone who's physically large is more capable of protecting you.
02:57:58.620
I think that's about women that aren't able to take care of themselves.
02:58:01.800
I think now, like, times are obviously different.
02:58:03.980
Women are, you know, we're not able to take care of ourselves.
02:58:06.940
So, I don't think that's, like, the case anymore.
02:58:15.220
Would any of you date a man who's shorter than you?
02:58:22.840
Yeah, because I already wore, like, four-inch platforms every day.
02:58:35.280
Ideally, would you like to date a guy who's taller than you?
02:58:37.820
Ideally, but, like, if the connection is just, like, through the roof, then I think it shouldn't matter.
02:59:08.280
See, but I don't think anybody bats an eye when women say, I want a guy who's my height
02:59:15.400
I don't think there's anything morally wrong with that, but, like, if, like, a guy that's,
02:59:20.080
like, 70 or 60 is wanting to date, like, a girl that's barely 21, I think there's something
02:59:31.960
I mean, for that specific example, couldn't you make the argument that it's actually more
02:59:37.880
predatory for the woman to want to date someone that old, for financial reasons?
02:59:44.580
For a woman to want to date, willing to date someone that old, I mean, love works in mysterious
02:59:51.840
ways, but I would say overwhelmingly, that's, there's going to be a financial component to
03:00:04.680
I mean, that's, like, the, that's arguing against a woman gaining a financial gain or
03:00:11.500
So, I feel like those are just two very different things.
03:00:16.560
A 70-year-old man dating an 18-year-old is not a pedophile.
03:00:20.280
That is definitely brinking on the fact that he probably did some questionable things in
03:00:24.640
his youth, yes, if he's still attracted to a woman that young when he's progressed that
03:00:31.640
So, 70-year-old who's, I mean, but again, here's the thing, is that, I mean, I'm
03:00:38.180
It's not even something that we can necessarily control.
03:00:41.480
What men find, the age range men find most physically attractive is 18 to 25.
03:00:47.340
Now, whether a man can actually get a woman who's in that age range if he's older, that's
03:00:53.920
But, if it was, I'd say if it was up to most men, most men do find that age range the most
03:01:02.800
I think finding it attractive is fine, but, like, pursuing it is the problem, because
03:01:09.540
It's, like, I'm only 22, and I can look at a kid who's 16 90% of the time, and I'm, like,
03:01:14.620
damn, they look like they're 12 or something, like, crazy already.
03:01:26.460
Like, even when I walked into this room and saw all these girls, I was, like, holy shit,
03:01:32.580
So, it's the older you get, the more child-liking, the younger somebody is, gets.
03:01:37.320
So, it's, like, that's why it is creepy to me, because if you were 80 years old, still
03:01:41.160
attracted to a 20-year-old, you were probably 20 years old, attracted to someone under the
03:01:49.400
I mean, the 70 to 21-year-old example, I mean, that's pretty rare, but, like, so, would you
03:02:18.900
Before I let you come in, Eric, can you pull up, if you can pull up the...
03:02:22.940
It might be tough for you to pull up the folders in the Dropbox.
03:02:27.000
I want you to pull up the two age range things in the other tab, if you can.
03:02:41.660
Because I want to show you guys, this was a study that was done that sort of shows the
03:02:46.260
age range attractiveness breakdown that I mentioned before.
03:02:51.900
I was just saying about the cougar thing or predatory nature.
03:02:56.960
I think they just have to focus on the fact that what are the repercussions for these young
03:03:01.140
boys and young girls who are being sought about, these older people who've had a lot
03:03:07.040
It's definitely going to change the way they see dating and hooking up.
03:03:10.560
Like, they're going to not want to, like, have, like, these high body counts or something.
03:03:15.160
Or they're not going to want to get with people who, like, are their age maybe because, like,
03:03:22.940
I think, like, of course, it doesn't matter if you're, like, a girl or a boy.
03:03:26.600
If you're being preyed on, there's going to be, like, you know, like, emotional repercussions.
03:03:30.920
And it's going to change, like, just the way, like, dating and hooking up is.
03:03:35.280
I mean, I don't think, it's not, I wouldn't consider it being preyed on because both men
03:03:42.620
So, if, I feel like you're taking away agency from young people.
03:03:48.120
Someone who's 21, they're, they can date someone who's 31.
03:04:15.880
At 18, you can sign the legally binding contract.
03:04:18.540
You can take on hundreds of thousands of dollars of student debt.
03:04:21.180
But you're telling me that an 18-year-old can't, doesn't want to fuck someone who's 10 years
03:04:35.020
It's like, if you're attracted to someone and, like, okay, if you're a 60-year-old man
03:04:40.020
and you're looking at a picture of a model and you find her attractive, like, I understand.
03:04:45.380
And what you're saying is, like, misconstruing the psychological kind of repercussions of
03:04:53.680
Like, do you think the laws that are given that they're right?
03:04:57.380
Like, the fact that we do have so much responsibility at such a young age, is that correct?
03:05:03.840
Those we have found out recently haven't had adequate research when they were introduced.
03:05:07.820
So, it's, of course, when someone, let's say, the age difference is 20 years, okay?
03:05:15.180
We're not making it super dramatic, but also, you know, kind of in the middle.
03:05:19.060
That, the age, the seniority gives them authority.
03:05:21.680
So, you're going to associate relationships with a figure of authority, making, like, making
03:05:25.640
you feel as if you don't have as much agency as you do.
03:05:28.940
Because, as you mentioned, technically, technically speaking, you do.
03:05:32.680
But you're going to be made, you, I mean, of course, there could be someone lovely and
03:05:36.340
it could all be love, but you could be made, like, feel like, oh, I'm young and they're
03:05:41.920
the ones that are going to make decisions for me.
03:05:43.500
And it almost sets up a weird, like, parental dynamic.
03:05:49.220
And also, I want to add to what you added for the evolutionary standpoint.
03:05:52.840
That's definitely proven by research, of course.
03:05:56.940
They prefer women who are young and have good skin.
03:06:00.080
Because that's, like, literally proven because they want women who, like, look like they can
03:06:04.680
But to say, like, to act on that when you're a certain age and to, you know, to make someone
03:06:11.080
feel as if they're, like, little and to feel like you're going to dominate them, not in
03:06:16.180
every case, but I don't think that's acceptable.
03:06:20.820
I mean, the thing is, is I just, I outright reject this idea that there is a, necessarily a
03:06:32.120
power imbalance or that it's predatory in any way.
03:06:39.760
There's guys in their 30s that want to date women, early 20s, whatever it may be.
03:06:46.080
So, you know, I think it just comes down to preferences, really.
03:06:52.060
If it happens to be the case that men generally have more of a preference for, you know, like,
03:06:58.540
women who are between the ages of 18 to 25, it is what it is.
03:07:03.520
I think most men are not going to be, to sort of add to your point, most men are not going
03:07:10.880
Because unless you're incredibly high status, for you to be, like, 35, 40, dating a girl
03:07:19.120
who's 20, you're going to have to be very high status, you know, athlete, musician, something
03:07:24.020
like that, or just be very financially well off.
03:07:28.100
And then you're kind of getting into, like, sugar baby, sugar daddy territory a little bit.
03:07:31.980
Um, so, I mean, it could be argued, though, that, you know, age is but only one of many
03:07:40.800
factors that could be related to, like, a supposed power imbalance.
03:07:46.260
Um, and I kind of reject the whole, like, power imbalance thing outside of workplace and
03:07:51.240
educational settings, and perhaps, like, medical or therapy settings.
03:07:55.280
Like, of course, that is definitely not appropriate.
03:07:59.200
Um, but, here's a scenario, okay, um, a 30-year-old man who is shy, who is a virgin, who's never,
03:08:08.100
I've written this down, who's never had sex, versus a 20-year-old, 21-year-old stripper who's
03:08:13.120
been having sex for three years, who's had multiple partners and multiple relationships
03:08:17.000
and multiple sugar daddies, who's been flown around the world, Dubai, um, who has, who has
03:08:26.920
I wanted to add something to what you were saying.
03:08:31.120
I didn't say power dynamics coming exclusively from age.
03:08:34.300
They could come from situations like this, and I was going to go off saying that in friendships,
03:08:38.320
there could be friendship dynamics with someone who's simply way more well-off or has way more
03:08:44.280
So, and I'm not, this is, what you're saying is a perfect example of a power dynamic, just
03:08:49.580
So, you're just saying that power dynamics exist in a different light, which is how the world
03:08:55.200
Where did, did anyone else want to come in on this?
03:08:59.980
Well, I mean, actually, sorry, before I have anyone else come in, Eric, were you able to
03:09:10.420
So, go to the podcast and then go to the infographics folder.
03:09:18.940
If you can pull those over to the tabs, just have it be a F11 whenever you're ready.
03:09:23.560
And pull up a age range one for, uh, yeah, we'll do age range one first.
03:09:41.540
So, a man's age versus the age of the women who look best to him.
03:09:50.680
They've done a bunch of articles on this stuff.
03:09:52.540
But, uh, so from 20 all the way to 50, it stays fairly consistent there.
03:09:59.360
Men are finding the peak age of women's physical attractiveness at 20.
03:10:03.080
And, Eric, if you can now go ahead and switch it to the, uh, next one.
03:10:13.000
A woman's age versus the age of the men who look best to her.
03:10:16.840
So, as you see, it kind of, for women, it, it, uh, kind of matches.
03:10:21.420
As they start to get a bit older, they start, it starts to, you know, air a little bit towards
03:10:27.080
But, overall, it's, uh, much different than the, the graph.
03:10:30.940
Eric, if you can go ahead and just put it back to center.
03:10:33.540
Um, so, did you want, it looked like you had something to say.
03:10:39.540
Is that, that looked like it was shocking to you.
03:10:51.360
Because I'm not trying to just, like, like hone in on that one factor.
03:10:55.880
But it's just because it is such a big thing in the whole world.
03:11:00.860
But in the whole world, it's something our world has dealt with is, but it's something
03:11:04.780
that's, you know, not spoken about, only beginning to be spoken about now.
03:11:09.900
So, it's just hard for my brain, especially studying sociology and looking at these numbers.
03:11:13.900
And my job is to look at stats and realize how those stats play on to our society and
03:11:19.000
And I know men have a bigger issue with having eyes for, not women, girls who are too young
03:11:27.540
It just seems like a very big parallel to the fact that most women find men their age
03:11:34.120
And also, how do you know they find 20-year-olds attractive?
03:11:36.680
They could just be saying that age because that's closer and it sounds better than them
03:11:41.400
saying 18 or 16 all the way up until they're 50 years old.
03:11:47.960
I think you're reaching here a little bit in terms of trying to paint men as trying to
03:11:54.780
date women who are not of age, or sorry, girls who are not of age.
03:11:58.480
It's not like I'm saying that I don't think all men, I don't even think 50% of men think
03:12:04.180
The amount of men that would pursue a woman who's not of age is very, very low.
03:12:14.740
There are, of course, there are definitely predator men.
03:12:30.060
I just, yes, you, people, everyone has their own different opinions.
03:12:33.340
Maybe just from the field that I'm in and things I get to see, witness, study, it's,
03:12:42.700
So that's the only thing I'm trying, it is kind of, I don't know.
03:12:49.780
I said less than 50, but you're saying very, very few.
03:12:56.100
Maybe document reported, but it's, it's not very, very few.
03:13:03.080
But I would say it's more than you're imagining or would like to admit or accept.
03:13:10.380
It's not, I'm not saying you, I'm not saying anyone in the room.
03:13:11.920
But it is a more prevalent, prevalent, prevalent issue in our world than most people would like to admit.
03:13:18.840
I haven't looked at, I'm sure they've done some sort of studies on the prevalence of that sort of thing.
03:13:24.480
I couldn't speak to it just because I haven't seen those studies.
03:13:27.640
I would wager, I would guess that it's 1%, maybe 2%.
03:13:37.740
So just from a woman who, as me alone, when I was under the age of 18, I had more than, okay, as a girl, as not a woman.
03:13:47.540
When I was under 18, if I came into contact with how many men I came into contact with that were over that age, well over that age,
03:13:53.560
it just means being one person, the percent has to be a lot higher than one.
03:13:57.680
And I don't know if any of these women can agree, but from personal experience,
03:14:01.320
I'm not saying it's the people around you necessarily, doesn't know that, but like, it's not doing it justice to say 1%.
03:14:08.220
We'll move on from that specific thing, but did anyone else want to come in on anything?
03:14:17.960
I think everyone's entitled to have their own preferences,
03:14:26.220
like if, say, the guy's down for the cougar and the cougar's down for the guy, then fine.
03:14:31.420
As long as everyone's okay with it, and there's like no emotional damage, then I think it's fine.
03:14:46.980
I remember before I said I wanted to bring up a list of preferences that I believe that men have in women.
03:15:00.260
I also have a list of preferences that I believe women have in men.
03:15:03.880
I could read that, too, if you guys want to disagree with any of those.
03:15:07.380
Before I do that, though, I need to get up really quick,
03:15:13.040
and then we're going to probably wrap up here in about 10, 15 minutes, guys.
03:15:19.580
I need to get up for about a minute, so I want to open it up to you guys.
03:15:24.980
I feel like I didn't even get to go all the way around on that initial question
03:15:28.680
as far as do you have a dating, something you want to get off your chest related to dating, right?
03:15:45.820
And I have to get up, so if one of you wants to ask the girls something,
03:15:49.120
if one of you can just carry the conversation for like a minute or two.
03:16:04.480
I mean, I guess I don't like hear, or like reading the comments even,
03:16:09.580
like I don't hear that sort of thing every day, like from like what we're saying
03:16:13.780
and like people in the comments responding, I guess, to what we're saying.
03:16:18.240
I don't hear that a lot, and I don't really see it because like in real life,
03:16:24.800
like men aren't going to go up to you and be like,
03:16:29.680
Like they're not going to like say this up front because they're obviously behind the screen.
03:16:35.080
But I'm just saying how it's super eye-opening to read all these comments.
03:16:39.980
Like you guys are watching this for three hours on a Tuesday at 10 p.m.
03:17:01.300
I have tattoos, and that's been the interesting thing for me is reading these comments.
03:17:07.340
It's the only thing they can think about or focus on,
03:17:09.160
and it's really funny seeing it from that realm because in public, going out, whatever,
03:17:15.240
That's like their number one, like, oh, I love your tattoos.
03:17:18.720
And then on here, it's like, does she know that's not attractive for a woman to have these tattoos?
03:17:31.580
Yeah, like in real life, they're not going to tell you this.
03:17:33.440
Yeah, they're not going to just try to come to your face and be like, oh, my God.
03:17:36.960
Behind a screen, and they don't have the balls to do it in person.
03:17:40.820
Did you guys thoroughly talk shit about me while I was gone?
03:17:51.280
Something about going over to a guy's house, or what was it?
03:18:04.540
Well, Esther mentioned how we felt about this podcast.
03:18:07.280
And I kind of said it's really eye-opening to see the comments.
03:18:10.980
Like, obviously, for me, like, everyday life, like, guys aren't, like, coming up to me or, like, telling me, like, responses on my opinions on, like, dating and all that.
03:18:22.300
And to see the comments and, like, reading them, like, firsthand, it's, like, really eye-opening.
03:18:30.140
I've just never been told this before in my life.
03:18:42.380
I mean, chat, they're going to be, chat's going to be chat, you know?
03:18:48.520
So, yeah, they're going to, I mean, they've talked a ton of shit about me.
03:19:06.100
I've just never been told that to my face before.
03:19:11.260
Usually people come up to me and they come up with my tattoos.
03:19:15.180
But then, like, the overall majority of them in the comments are saying, which I know this
03:19:18.840
group is a selected group of men anyways, but they're just all saying tattoos equals
03:19:27.760
I've just never had that connotation said to me before or in my tattoo community because
03:19:35.860
Maybe I've had a tramp stamp or something, but, like, I've never been told.
03:20:18.660
How's that relevant to anyone else but you, like...
03:20:20.620
It's so good that you like it, and, like, any comments are just, like, why are they so opinionated?
03:20:27.200
I've never been aware of this, like, connotation between tattoos.
03:20:32.920
Tyler Durden here wants a fit check from the panel.
03:20:35.760
I'll leave it up to you guys if you want to do a fit check.
03:20:49.280
Yeah, we're going to wrap up here very soon, guys.
03:20:53.840
Actually, so, on the tattoo thing, I want to ask the chat.
03:21:00.800
So, you were saying that people were saying, in the chat, women with tattoos are viewed as...
03:21:10.220
I'm wondering how I want to frame this question to the chat.
03:21:14.160
One in the chat, if you like tattoos on women, and two in the chat, if you dislike tattoos on a woman.
03:21:26.360
Two in the chat, if you dislike tattoos on a woman.
03:22:15.060
So, if you guys want to get a Super Chat in, now's the opportunity.
03:22:46.100
There's nothing wrong with wanting someone who is loyal and pure.
03:22:48.340
Values can boil down to the ability to make intelligent decisions.
03:22:58.000
I believe Elder Scrolls here is talking about...
03:23:02.940
I assume this is related to our body count discussion.
03:23:12.640
Probably the lower your body count, the more loyal you're going to be.
03:23:26.940
Their body count could be one and not be loyal.
03:23:32.720
So it doesn't mean every time, but like, I don't know the statistics or whatever, but
03:23:39.360
Would you say that more likely than not, someone who has a high body count is more likely to
03:23:58.300
If I'm a betting man, someone who's a virgin is going to be far more loyal than someone who
03:24:04.640
But what if the person that has slept with a hundred people is sick of it and they're
03:24:08.040
like, I'm ready to commit this person that just lost their virginity.
03:24:16.760
And I remember you saying this a bit earlier on in the show.
03:24:19.680
Body count isn't the amount of times you've had sex.
03:24:25.220
So if you've had sex with one person five times, that your body count is not five.
03:24:31.640
Your body count is like the different people, five different people.
03:24:35.960
But so you're, so you're saying if someone is a virgin who sleeps with someone and they're
03:24:41.980
Let me go do it with a whole bunch of other people.
03:24:43.700
Or I would assume if someone's a virgin, they're going to want to continue doing it with that
03:24:56.820
Uh, and I actually, I do know both men and women that I think it's more so the case with
03:25:01.900
men, but there are definitely women out there that just, they don't need to be in love with
03:25:09.040
They just kind of, some women just want to lose it.
03:25:10.880
So, um, I guess what's the, I, I had, I had a thought on this the day before.
03:25:17.360
I guess like a woman who's going to, a future, don't hate me guys.
03:25:25.300
Someone who's promiscuous has to start somewhere.
03:25:28.960
If she's, if it's, um, foregone conclusion that she's going to be promiscuous, she's
03:25:35.240
got, she's going to lose her virginity at some point.
03:25:40.460
Your whole career is based on feeding into misogyny and incel behavior.
03:25:47.060
Um, your whole career is based on feeding into misogyny and incel behavior.
03:25:51.960
I mean, I, if you don't like the facts, I'm sorry.
03:25:57.980
Um, I'm not sure what specifically I said that was misogynistic though, or, um, had anything
03:26:05.000
to do with incel behavior, but, uh, if any girls at the table want to speak on behalf
03:26:11.860
of Miss Bridget McCabe, if any of you think I'm a misogynist, you can say it.
03:26:18.780
I don't, I don't think I've said anything, uh, which would indicate that I hate women or
03:26:24.600
that I am, uh, have some sort of disdain for women, but.
03:26:29.600
It's like, I think it's more of the value, uh, like how you see women's value, I think
03:26:34.660
is rather, it makes me rather uncomfortable, but.
03:26:45.380
But, like, I don't know if that's inherently entirely misogynistic, but that's, uh, kind
03:26:52.300
of unpleasant to hear that men's value is somehow based in other things.
03:27:00.620
I really don't want to go to back to the body count thing.
03:27:05.740
Um, well, okay, so I want to make something clear, clear, like, so as far as your value
03:27:11.820
as a human, I mean that, that your, your body count isn't, that's not a factor there, but
03:27:18.400
when it comes to making, and we all make judgments, whether you guys want to admit it or not, we
03:27:23.700
all make judgments about the potent, the people that we're potentially going to be partnering
03:27:27.380
with, sleeping with, hooking up with, having long-term relationships with, marrying even.
03:27:35.120
So, I mean, um, you know, I, from a human rights perspective or whatever, like, I believe,
03:27:45.300
of course, like, I see the value in both men and women, but for, for me, for my preferences,
03:27:52.160
for a preference, for a standard, for a boundary, body count matters to me.
03:27:57.860
So, it's, it's not so much about your value as a human being, but I mean, we all, we all
03:28:05.720
We all make judgment calls when it comes to, uh, potential partners in the same way, like
03:28:09.800
all of, most of you just said, like, I want to date a guy who's taller than me.
03:28:17.160
So, uh, you're making a value call, so to speak, based off of a guy's height.
03:28:22.220
Like, the fact of the matter is, a guy who's shorter than you could be a fantastic partner,
03:28:26.520
loving, loyal, great person, but it happens to be that you're not attract, you might not
03:28:33.300
be attracted to men who are of a smaller stature than you.
03:28:37.260
And I think that's totally fine because I think there's an evolutionary, uh, reason for
03:28:43.620
women to want to date men who are taller than them or are physically, or who have some sort
03:28:48.440
of physical prowess or who are larger than them.
03:28:52.360
So, I mean, it just sort of comes back to the whole preferences thing.
03:29:14.220
So, next, sorry, hold on, we got a super chat here.
03:29:23.000
Um, Nicholas Val, $10 soup chat, what'd y'all rate yourselves in terms of looks from one
03:29:27.500
to 10 and what is your least attractive attribute?
03:29:34.440
Um, so, I mean, yeah, sorry, Nicholas, we already kind of did it.
03:29:39.100
Um, I don't know if you want to, like, look back.
03:29:45.200
Um, I guess he is asking about your, what you think your least attractive attribute
03:29:50.060
I mean, if you guys want to answer, if you guys have something you're self-conscious
03:30:17.420
So, I said I would talk about a couple preferences here and then we're going to wrap up.
03:30:28.600
I mean, or we could try to wrap up a bit sooner.
03:30:31.180
I'll leave it up to you guys because we have gone a bit over.
03:30:33.640
So, we can just watch the video wrap up or I did mention before, I could go down a list
03:30:51.400
So, youthful, feminine, fidelitous, from the jump, peaceful, pleasant, not quarrelsome,
03:31:02.820
doesn't nag, gentle, innocent, modest, humble, demure, temperance, cooperative, submissive,
03:31:15.140
and submissive gets a bad, submissive gets a bad rap, but outside the bedroom here, we're
03:31:20.600
talking about willful cooperation, follows your lead, not obese, fit, petite, and then
03:31:30.740
Some men like big boobs, some men like small boobs.
03:31:37.200
Fat ass, does not have, sorry, does not have plastic surgery.
03:31:42.000
So, no BBL, no fake breasts, no lipo, no fake lips, doesn't cake on makeup, or wears no
03:31:48.900
makeup, has long hair, shaves her body hair, hasn't slept with a lot of men, so low body
03:31:54.780
count, not a single mother, doesn't party, doesn't go to bars, clubs, drinks in moderation,
03:32:11.580
This is not necessarily, I mean, a lot of these things, yes, I would liken a partner.
03:32:19.080
I mean, I have to agree with a lot of the things on this list here, but I mean, I mentioned
03:32:25.240
big boobs, like I don't really, if big boobs are great, whatever, but like, I don't really
03:32:30.960
But this is more generally just some things that men want.
03:32:34.960
It's not, it's fairly, it's a fairly robust list.
03:32:41.960
Some guys might not want some of these things, but I think this is what a lot of men want.
03:32:49.720
I saw a couple grimaces while I was reading that list.
03:32:53.660
Was there anything anyone wanted to come in on?
03:32:57.960
Do you guys have requirements before you fuck somebody too, or just an actual relationship?
03:33:04.200
Because I know a lot of those things don't go on with.
03:33:06.700
So what I would say is that, and this also actually comes down to, back to body count too
03:33:11.680
a little bit, for just, if we're just going to sleep with a girl, we're going to be less
03:33:19.920
For long-term serious relationships, marriage, life partner, long-term relationship, body count
03:33:28.540
I mean, I would still say, even for a hookup for me, and I think for a lot of guys, if all
03:33:34.740
things, you know, would we prefer someone with a low body count even for a one night stand?
03:33:45.540
So how many times do you think on the actual list, like do you guys actually like make somebody
03:33:51.260
Like I feel like you guys say that, but then it comes down to it.
03:33:53.620
It's like whatever girl responds the most to you out of that week is, am I going to be
03:34:02.300
So when it comes to something casual, men are going to be more forgiving on their preferences.
03:34:14.080
If they just want to get laid, like they're going to let probably a lot of stuff slide.
03:34:18.760
But when it comes to a serious relationship, then they're going to have much more stringent
03:34:24.860
standards, preferences, and boundaries for women.
03:34:28.480
And, sorry, what was the last part that you just said there?
03:34:31.820
So like when you do actually, you know, it's time for a relationship, you're settling down,
03:34:36.640
How often do you guys actually check off most of those boxes?
03:34:39.420
I feel like it's like, you know, is it like two, three?
03:34:45.400
Well, I think the big thing is, is that most men don't have, like a lot of men don't really
03:34:57.440
So a lot of guys are, it's very, like I said, it's hard for men to get laid.
03:35:05.440
So most men will tolerate a lot of stuff just to get laid.
03:35:10.680
And if they can continue seeing that girl, they'll probably, a lot of dudes are sins.
03:35:18.440
Because most men do not, most men don't have the same level of abundance that women have.
03:35:27.160
So women, you guys have an abundance mentality.
03:35:33.560
Like you might be talking to a couple different guys.
03:35:35.520
Like there's a couple different guys that are pursuing you, that are courting you.
03:35:38.480
But most men don't have, they're not in a very strong negotiating position, let's say,
03:35:49.320
So as far as there being a checklist and like, oh, she's got to do this, this, and this.
03:35:54.300
Honestly, most men just don't be obese, be pleasant, and fuck them.
03:36:04.220
But there are definitely men out there that are going to want you to bring more.
03:36:06.720
And I think where some women kind of can get into some issues where men are not willing to commit to them,
03:36:16.600
If pussy is all you're offering, pussy is all men are going to want.
03:36:19.660
And this kind of goes back a little bit to what you said at the very beginning of the podcast,
03:36:26.360
that women are viewed as the prize and that it's women saying, impress me, impress me,
03:36:37.520
But women are not very often thinking, what am I bringing to the table?
03:37:00.500
And so what happens is, is that women will sleep with a guy and then he'll lose interest or ghost you.
03:37:08.420
Sometimes, I mean, maybe that hasn't been your guys' experience.
03:37:14.960
I don't know if that adequately answers your question.
03:37:18.300
Okay, yeah, Kathleen's another hater in the chat.
03:37:25.400
So, and, but I want to just, I went through some of the traits that women want, or sorry, men want in women.
03:37:33.280
I'd like to give a few that I believe women want in men.
03:37:36.300
Just to balance this out, because maybe you were thinking, whoa, Brian, that's a fuck ton of stuff.
03:37:40.800
But let me just go over a few that I believe women want in men.
03:37:48.900
By the way, these are things women want in men.
03:37:57.260
Nice forearms, wide shoulders, six-pack abs, large peen.
03:38:01.860
Clean shaven, or some women, you know, like a mustache or a beard, but it can go in either way.
03:38:07.560
Dresses nicely, who can protect her, who can provide, who's confident, masculine, dominant, ambitious.
03:38:41.760
But funny, exciting, tells good stories, intelligent, competent, handy, doesn't live with his parents, doesn't play video games, doesn't watch porn, doesn't have a photo of him holding a fish.
03:38:56.900
I don't know what that, I'm not sure what that one's about.
03:39:01.040
Can fix things, stoic, sexually experienced, great in bed, et cetera, et cetera.
03:39:05.880
So, just to sort of level off, you know, the expectations that I think both men and women are looking for in a potential partner.
03:39:28.780
Just to sort of put a nice little cherry on this conversation.
03:39:37.980
Can you please ask the girls if they were considering dating you?
03:39:50.700
I don't suspect any of the women would want to date me because I'm certainly older than them.
03:39:55.680
And given what they've said, it's probably unlikely.
03:40:05.500
And then we've got a super sticker for Canadian.
03:40:11.180
And then trash shirt, shirt one, and black hair.
03:40:15.140
Sorry, Lundowski, but they slayed this conversation.
03:40:26.080
I want to give you guys one last opportunity if you guys want to say anything.
03:40:29.220
Otherwise, we're going to react to this video and we're going to wrap up.
03:40:35.900
Okay, Eric, if you can pull up the Bo Burnham clip.
03:40:55.120
How many single ladies out there looking for love tonight?
03:41:17.960
You want a guy that's sweet, a guy that's tough, a feminist who likes to pay for stuff.
03:41:23.080
The kind of guy that gets along with your friends without being attracted to any of them.
03:41:27.500
A good boy, a bad boy, a good bad boy, a half good, half bad, half boy.
03:41:31.800
Loves your brother since the day but not weekend.
03:41:34.260
Is a great lover, calls your mother on the weekend.
03:41:37.040
Now you might think this guy only exists in your mind.
03:41:47.100
If you want love, lower your expectations a few.
03:41:53.040
Because friends charming would never settle for you.
03:41:56.020
If you want love, just pick a guy and love him.
03:42:02.040
And if he's got a thing for feet, say fuck it, sweep me off them.
03:42:06.040
Now, the good thing is that, uh, at least men have very realistic expectations for women.
03:42:16.020
He said, sarcastically setting up a second verse in a comedy's hug.
03:42:20.240
You want a girl that's nice, a girl that's not, obsessed with her looks but is insanely hot.
03:42:27.740
The kind of girl that you can show to your folks, love the movies that you like and always laughs at your jokes.
03:42:32.120
A real girl, a hot girl, a really hot girl, a brand new, really hot, real doll.
03:42:36.820
Wants to impress, he doesn't care if you notice, and only ever uses you to tickle her throat with.
03:42:41.380
Now, you might think that this girl only exists in your mind.
03:42:51.760
If you want love, lower your expectations a lot.
03:42:57.540
You might think your dick is a gift, I promise it's not.
03:43:00.760
If you want love, just pick a girl that loved her.
03:43:06.120
Then whip out your dick and let the girl you loved it climb the offer.
03:43:10.140
I don't want a neat freak, I don't want a slob, somebody with bedhead and a dead-end job.
03:43:20.760
We want perfect children, a perfect life, perfect husband or a perfect wife.
03:43:40.340
Anyways, the girls are getting bored of the clip.
03:44:02.020
Unless any of you wanted to give a reaction to that.
03:44:09.620
It was kind of sort of related to the conversation we were just having.
03:44:13.240
I just think an important thing about what girls look for, guys, how the fruition of their
03:44:20.080
relationship and how things are going to advance.
03:44:23.220
Me looking for a guy who is able or has passions and a career, that's something that can definitely
03:44:32.520
A lot of the things you're listening with that guys want is not something a girl can work
03:44:40.740
Like, that's, like, you know, like, you're not going to take back your body or something.
03:44:44.620
I mean, like, you can, like, there's, like, revergerizing, whatever.
03:44:47.300
And also, like, it's like, yeah, like, I can have a preference for a guy to be tall.
03:44:52.600
Like, a guy can have a preference for me to be a blonde.
03:44:54.840
Like, you know, those are definitely things that people have.
03:44:57.440
But I think, like, the bottom line is that guys have a lot of preferences to, like, make
03:45:04.400
While a girl has a lot of preferences for the relationship to be better or to have a good relationship.
03:45:10.940
And I think that's just, like, what the list kind of shows.
03:45:14.660
I mean, so you're saying that of the preferences I listed, by the way, for both men and women,
03:45:25.600
I would actually say that women have a lot more control over the things that men like
03:45:32.780
about them than the things that women like about men.
03:45:42.260
You absolutely have control over your body count.
03:45:46.080
Yeah, but I mean, like, if you're coming at me and I'm, like, 30 and you expect me to
03:45:53.780
You could still have a low body count at 30, though.
03:45:57.400
Like, there's, like, religious aspects that you don't want to.
03:46:03.060
I think body count matters, so that's just not something I share.
03:46:10.520
I mean, actually, just I want to go around the panel.
03:46:20.780
I moved to Santa Barbara when I was five, so I've lived here for a long time.
03:46:45.040
I can neither confirm or deny any of these numbers.
03:46:58.120
I cannot, no, I'm being facetious, but no, I'm not, just not something I reveal.
03:47:05.300
But, okay, so I do want to address your comment.
03:47:08.180
So, I mean, I feel like a lot of the stuff, it's like, some of the stuff is just stuff you
03:47:14.900
I'm, like, I'm not going to be, like, a submissive little baby for, like, some man who can't,
03:47:24.980
Like, I definitely do think, like, it's good to have your preferences.
03:47:31.100
But I think, like, at some point, like, it's just, like, it's very telling on your, like,
03:47:36.080
identity and personality more than it is on mine.
03:47:38.040
And, like, you just wanting to meet, wanting me to be, like, a very specific way is just
03:47:45.380
Women don't want men to be a very specific way?
03:47:50.020
I'm just saying, like, like, you have your preferences, right?
03:47:54.420
Are you talking about me specifically or are you talking about men?
03:47:56.280
Like, everyone's just saying, like, oh, they can't address that people have preferences.
03:48:02.100
I think just, like, the big issue is, like, what does it tell about you?
03:48:05.420
And that's, like, what, like, I'm trying to, like, look at.
03:48:08.160
Like, women, like, are, like, men will look at, like, a girl's preference and, like, that'll
03:48:13.000
tell something about them while I'll look at men's preference and tell something about
03:48:16.420
Like, I'm not saying, like, it's, like, you're stupid for, like, thinking this and that.
03:48:19.780
I'm just saying, like, there's a lot you get off from how, like, what, there's a lot
03:48:24.300
you get off from a person from, like, what they find is, like, the most, what they
03:48:30.960
Well, that's also why it's important to find someone that meets your preference.
03:48:35.420
And not trying to make someone match to your preferences because, you know, typically
03:48:41.420
if somebody has preferences set and somebody's meeting all those preferences, then they probably
03:48:45.320
already are the type of person that they're wanting.
03:48:48.940
But, like, if, you know, you meet somebody and you're trying to make them change to fit
03:48:53.040
everything you like, because maybe a couple of things are good about them, then, yeah,
03:48:56.120
it's probably not going to work because you guys aren't meant to be together to begin
03:48:59.600
But, like, Virx thinks it's 25 divided by three.
03:49:06.920
It's multiply for women and divide by three for men, apparently.
03:49:15.160
But so, your initial thing was, though, that of the list, there were things that you took
03:49:25.760
issue with some of the preferences that I said some men have, right?
03:49:30.640
Well, I feel like we've been talking about body count this whole time, so that's what
03:49:37.880
I mean, I don't honestly remember, like, what all the lists said.
03:49:54.340
I want to give a big thank you to the lovely panel for coming on.
03:50:03.420
I know we debated some stuff, but I genuinely appreciate it.
03:50:07.380
I think it's good to be able to have conversations like these.
03:50:10.460
If we're not able to talk, if we're not able to disagree, then communication doesn't happen.
03:50:17.620
So, big thank you to all you guys for coming on.
03:50:22.160
We did get started a little bit late, but we're going to get you home soon.
03:50:26.580
So, yeah, and thank you to the audience for tuning in.
03:50:29.740
You could have been doing anything else, but you're here with me.
03:50:40.360
Like the video and leave a comment on your way out for the algorithm.
03:50:45.100
Thank you guys again for watching, and we will see you guys next time.