Single Mom w⧸ Neck Tattoo Brings NOTHING To The Table?! | Dating Talk #90
Episode Stats
Length
3 hours and 11 minutes
Words per Minute
181.0889
Hate Speech Sentences
200
Summary
In this episode of Whatever Dating Talk, host Brian Atlas is joined by his co-host, Kiki, as they talk about dating in your 20's and 30's, what it's like being single, and what it means to be a woman in your 30's and 40's.
Transcript
00:00:07.380
We're coming to you live from Santa Barbara, California
00:00:18.060
Guys, a few quick announcements before the show begins.
00:00:35.280
If you donate 100, Streamlabs only takes three.
00:00:48.580
If you want to interact nearly instantly with us
00:01:01.640
Please see the description for all other triggers
00:01:54.840
Check out my non-profit Big Labia Matter or BLM for short.
00:02:00.560
we have three clips, channels, links in the description.
00:02:06.480
we're going to have the guests introduce themselves.
00:02:08.260
So please tell us your name, age, and occupation.
00:02:11.420
I'm 23, and I model and do OnlyFans and some acting.
00:02:24.880
I'm also studying to be a marriage and family therapist.
00:03:53.420
I was going to tell you, but you ended already.
00:04:13.940
What we are going to do, and Madison, maybe keep tabs on it.
00:04:28.600
I didn't finish, but I'm a student studying econ and accounting.
00:04:33.800
I do the whatever podcast, and I'm a host at a bar.
00:04:43.400
Rigo, because you weren't close enough to the mic, so reintroduce yourself.
00:04:48.480
I'm 23, and I model, do OnlyFans, and some acting.
00:05:33.440
Mostly myself, but I had a friend coming on tonight.
00:05:51.960
Like with public interviews, we'll ask like questions that promote our OnlyFans.
00:06:06.340
Like who do you believe has a heart in society, men or women?
00:06:16.380
If yes, who would you ever subbed to my OnlyFans?
00:06:24.740
We have like separate platforms, but we go together.
00:06:39.280
I've got some real fucking conversationalists here with me tonight.
00:06:42.820
So current relationship status, single, talking stage, situationship, friends with benefits,
00:06:53.140
How long have you been single, if you're single, and your longest relationship?
00:06:57.780
My longest relationship was four years, and I've only had long-term relationships.
00:07:04.600
I haven't really had many situationships, but I've tried, and it's just a hard dating
00:07:11.460
I live in Hawaii, so like there's not many people.
00:07:15.300
Every time you're on an app, you see them in the store if you scrolled past them or whatever.
00:07:19.040
So yeah, I've been trying, but I'm moving, so I'm not trying too hard.
00:07:35.460
I'm going to Texas soon, so I don't really want to start dating someone in Hawaii if I'm
00:07:46.100
I'm aiming for fall, but I want to experience all of Hawaii that I haven't experienced yet.
00:07:52.200
I want to do all the hikes I haven't done, do like OFTV out there and stuff, and show people
00:08:03.440
Well, you said you were single for three years, and you're 20, so was this like a high school
00:08:08.800
Started in high school, and then went on, so yeah.
00:08:17.380
My longest relationship was about four and a half years.
00:08:22.520
I've been single, really I've been single for about three years.
00:08:27.720
I did have a really short-term relationship a few months ago, but all of my relationships
00:08:33.640
have been pretty long, so it's hard to count that one.
00:08:41.660
Single, Pringle, longest relationship two years, and that was in 2018.
00:09:08.280
Longest relationship was two years, and I've been single for like a year now.
00:09:17.900
I think I ended up, I ended it, I ended that way.
00:09:29.420
My longest relationship was about almost two years, and that was about a year ago, almost
00:09:37.020
a year ago, so it's been about a year in February.
00:09:41.800
I am in a relationship, and it is also my longest relationship of, so far, two years
00:09:57.280
I have been single for nine years, and my longest relationship was eight months.
00:10:12.340
My current relationship is my longest relationship.
00:10:19.720
Okay, so besides Madison and you over there, everyone here is single.
00:10:28.600
Because, I mean, come on, for some of you who are single, there's a guy in the picture.
00:10:46.160
It's not a situationship, because it's like, we're just like hanging out.
00:10:54.640
We're like just hanging out, whatever, but it's like, I don't know.
00:11:03.800
How long have you been just hanging out with said individual?
00:11:10.560
So like, I don't know if I can take it seriously yet.
00:11:14.620
That's why it's like not even made it to the situationship.
00:11:19.420
Like, would you consider it a talking stage, or?
00:11:35.120
Don't really feel like, I just don't want to answer the phone.
00:11:46.300
Let's start the donos and get some Ws in the chat for Brian.
00:11:54.940
By the way, Brandon is in Santa Barbara, so we're going to, we were going to try to have
00:12:06.440
And yes, when you come by the studio, you can have a whatever t-shirt.
00:12:18.380
I just don't feel like entertaining anyone right now.
00:12:30.080
Because you said that you've been single for like a year, about?
00:12:36.620
I mean, you go on a date, but it doesn't mean you're going to do anything.
00:12:44.200
It's just kind of like, eh, I want to socialize today.
00:13:08.820
So I feel like my whole life I've always been, like, a very relationship-oriented person.
00:13:16.580
And then after a year went by, I had another three-year relationship.
00:13:19.320
So I'm finally, like, okay, let me settle down and just not try to find myself more.
00:13:25.460
So I'm taking myself on trips and going on a lot of girls' trips out the country, seeing
00:13:29.560
more cultures and not focusing on guys right now.
00:13:54.260
I've had two situationships, you could call them, in between.
00:13:58.540
But as of the past four years, I am not sexually active, and I do not intend to be.
00:14:07.180
And I'm ultimately going to be waiting for my husband.
00:14:09.700
So nine years seems like a long time, but I have an ultimate goal at the end of it.
00:14:18.280
And those, like, two situationships that you had where they just ended because it wasn't
00:14:24.500
what you were looking for in a husband, or was it more casual?
00:14:33.900
I'd say that with the two situationships that I had, I definitely was in love with either
00:14:45.520
And the first one ended up getting sick and passed away.
00:15:14.600
But you said, and when did you make this decision to be a born-again virgin?
00:15:24.980
Prior to one incident, one night, I was not active like two or three years prior to that.
00:15:39.220
So you were born-again virgin like seven years ago?
00:15:59.200
What do you mean, you're not backing down this time?
00:16:02.380
Are you talking about the situation four years ago?
00:16:07.360
So the one night that I messed up the seven years, and now it's technically four, that
00:16:17.640
And now my faith is much stronger, and I am ultimately waiting.
00:16:24.540
So there's a commitment behind it this time that's actually real.
00:16:44.740
The Australian gentleman, they're very strapping and charismatic.
00:16:51.200
I will say, though, I was pressured into it, and I did not want to do it.
00:16:55.200
But ultimately, it was consent, so I have full responsibility for that, but yeah.
00:17:04.900
I did not want to do it, but ultimately, it was my fault, because I said yes in the end.
00:17:10.340
I don't know if that's a rabbit hole I really want to go down, but you said...
00:17:23.780
Like, in the moment, you said yes, but obviously you faltered when it came to your commitment
00:17:32.200
to waiting, to being a born-again virgin, so I'm just trying to...
00:17:45.540
You said you were pressured, but you said you also consented, so I'm just...
00:17:48.640
Yes, he kept asking, like, I mean, we were obviously getting heated, but at the same time,
00:17:55.940
I said, no, that's for my husband, we're not doing anything else, and I had a weak moment.
00:18:02.880
My faith was not strong at that point in time, and I said yes, so there's not much more to
00:18:15.000
Okay, so, a couple of you said single, no guy in the picture, I'll take your words for
00:18:41.360
I would say about 80% of my clients are women, 20% men.
00:18:53.180
Oh, yeah, in your Instagram bios, it says, a woman putting other women on game.
00:18:57.600
Yeah, so there are a lot of women who aren't aware of the mind games that a lot of men play.
00:19:14.460
And this isn't like a man versus woman, and I'm like all anti-men or anything.
00:19:19.540
But because largely my clients come to me to be put on game, I just go down the rabbit
00:19:29.800
hole of what red flags to avoid, what green flags to look out for.
00:19:38.220
I would say I do, for my male clients, I do somewhat the same.
00:19:47.660
I can coach women really deeply because I am a woman, and I do have that experience, but
00:19:56.640
At a certain point, I can maybe get him 70% of the way.
00:19:59.680
At a certain point, I send him off to a male coach who can actually, has that lived experience
00:20:09.400
I specialize in relationship coaching, people who are healing from narcissistic abuse, healing
00:20:16.700
trauma, releasing obsessive overthinking patterns.
00:20:20.540
Essentially, in short, what I do is I help people release low vibrational life circumstances,
00:20:29.680
To transform their life and to put them in a higher frequency so that they can essentially
00:20:35.680
have stronger discernment to attract better, whether it's purpose, whether it's relationships,
00:20:43.200
Is it general life coaching or more framed from dating-related coaching?
00:20:56.260
Relationships and regular life is so synced, and everything affects everything else.
00:21:04.080
So, largely what I go really deeply with is people releasing low habits, obsessive overthinking
00:21:11.920
patterns, strengthening their confidence, and really ultimately strengthening their discernment,
00:21:30.540
We'll come back to a couple of those things here.
00:21:33.160
So, a few of you have so kindly provided me some pre-show information, so I'm just going
00:21:48.960
So, what about dating or relationships or whatever do you find to be dishonest?
00:21:55.720
Is it on the men's part, the women's part, both?
00:22:00.360
I only know women's from my point of view and what friends tell me, so I don't really
00:22:05.320
But I know from my point of view, I try to be very honest, and I'll end up in...
00:22:10.080
Not anymore, because I'm trying to take a break from the apps and going out and meeting
00:22:13.620
people, but when I was trying and seeking someone that I could be with, I'd be on the
00:22:19.040
apps, or I'd be meeting people in person, and they would act like, oh, you're the only
00:22:24.140
person I'm talking to, and I just want to be with you, and dropped all my... all my
00:22:29.680
hoes, I don't know if I can say it, I don't know if I can say it on here, but I dropped
00:22:33.100
all my hoes for you and everything, and then the next minute, they wouldn't talk to
00:22:37.840
me for a week, and then I would be like, okay, I'm going to go on another date, and
00:22:41.260
that they'd see I was on a date, and they'd get mad, like, well, you ghosted me for a
00:22:44.580
week, I didn't think you were really into me, and they're like, no, I am, and then
00:22:47.060
they would ghost again, and then find out they were hooking up with, like, other people
00:22:50.380
in the town, and it's just too messy, and I would rather people just be honest.
00:22:55.220
If you just want to hook up with someone, just say you want to hook up.
00:22:57.420
If you want more than that, say you want more than that, but...
00:23:03.500
So primarily dishonesty when it came to intentions?
00:23:07.320
Okay, so these guys would say, I'm only talking to you, only got eyes for you, but in reality,
00:23:15.560
Yeah, and then if it was like, okay, if you want to date other people, I can too, and then
00:23:18.740
I would try, and then they'd get really mad at me, and like, how could you?
00:23:22.680
And it's like, you're dating three other people, I just want them on one date.
00:23:26.360
And you said that you'd prefer if people were more upfront with their...
00:23:31.320
So, I think you said something along the lines of, if they just want to hook up, they should
00:23:37.340
say that, and if they want something serious, they should say that.
00:23:46.640
I feel like most relationships start a bit more casual, and then you continue seeing each
00:23:52.960
other in a casual sort of way, and then eventually you end up, you figure out, oh, we both kind
00:23:58.540
of like each other, then you end up in a relationship.
00:24:01.200
I guess, but all my relationships that started that way didn't really end well, so for the
00:24:05.420
next one, I want to start as friends, and then make them wait, and wait, and then see
00:24:09.080
if they actually really want me, and see if we really get along before I have casual relations
00:24:17.320
Or even start with, like, a crush, but I'm still not going to jump into any romantic feelings
00:24:22.440
I think people naturally just like to play games with people, men and women.
00:24:29.720
Okay, so you, when you say wait, do you mean wait to have sex?
00:24:43.000
I also feel like it's just, like, harder to just be friends with people, especially if
00:24:47.440
you're finding them off of dating apps, because the intention is not to just be friends,
00:24:54.020
I'm talking about, like, meeting people in person, friends of friends, or...
00:24:58.600
I did fire dancing, so I'd meet some fire dancers sometimes that never really liked them enough
00:25:03.020
to even consider casual before dating or anything, you know?
00:25:07.400
Okay, so, I mean, there's a couple things there.
00:25:10.280
So, you said in your past relationships, though, that you didn't...
00:25:25.540
I still would make them wait, like, a week or so, but I feel like that might not have been
00:25:29.560
I mean, I did date them for a long time, but the attachment, I think, happened a little
00:25:34.260
bit too quickly than it should have, and I ended up...
00:25:39.680
I ended up breaking up with the relationships I was in because I eventually was just over
00:25:44.560
it, and one relationship, I was being, like, the mother to someone, basically.
00:25:53.980
Like, rent, all their food, clothes, everything.
00:26:01.700
And I didn't want to, and he would make jokes about it.
00:26:03.600
It would be at a dinner with friends, and he'd be like, I love having a sugar mama when
00:26:06.340
I'd have to pay for his meal because he was broke.
00:26:21.060
You can make some pretty good money doing that, right?
00:26:26.580
How old was the guy at the time when you were dating him?
00:26:37.860
I mean, I can out-earn someone, but I don't want to pay for your entire life.
00:26:42.940
Like, he had a job, and then he quit his job to party, and he would go out and drink with
00:26:55.640
I had the four year, and then I had one year, and then two years.
00:26:58.000
So how long were you paying the rent and everything for?
00:27:01.600
He moved into my place because he got kicked out because he was living at a frat house,
00:27:05.040
and they threw a party, and they got in trouble, and I was like, fine, you can come live with
00:27:09.460
So I let him live with me for free when I was in this one condo, which was $5,000 a month
00:27:14.800
for a one-bedroom, one-bath, because Hawaii is ridiculous.
00:27:17.700
And so I let him live there with me for free at first, and then we went to go rent another
00:27:23.080
place, rented a house together, and he said he was going to pay for some of the rent, or
00:27:27.940
at least, like, maybe cook some food, or do something, and didn't do anything, just played
00:27:39.440
Okay, so, out of curiosity, for those of you who do OF, how much do you guys make?
00:27:48.880
Let's say if you have that monthly average, if you have to average it over a year, per
00:27:52.960
month or per year, you make six figures a year?
00:28:44.500
But in any case, I mean, it sounds like you're probably out earning this guy.
00:29:01.120
Anyways, who else do you know that drops this back-to-back-to-back-to-back-to-back?
00:29:08.320
I said, let's get some W's in the chat for Brickson.
00:29:19.180
Thank you so much, Brandon, for your patronage.
00:29:21.820
That does trigger the champagne, so we'll do the champagne.
00:29:24.140
And, Mary, if you can bring it over to me here.
00:29:44.480
I fucking watched a YouTube video on how to do it.
00:30:14.640
Brandon Melz, thank you for the champagne bottle pop here.
00:30:20.600
We'll let the people serve as they'd like if you guys want any.
00:30:50.600
I watched a YouTube instructional on how to open it, so I got it figured out.
00:31:00.700
While you were dating this man, did you find that it was hard for you to respect him?
00:31:05.460
At first, I respected him, but then it became, like, turned into resentment and more, yeah,
00:31:14.000
And it felt like I was, like, a caregiver or a mother, and I'm not old enough to be a caregiver
00:31:18.880
I should be doing that on my own, taking care of myself before I'm taking care of someone
00:31:22.680
But, so, at first, it was, like, no, I understand, like, he was still in college, but then he
00:31:30.600
So, at first, I was, like, you're still trying, so it's okay.
00:31:33.960
Like, I'll help you meet ends and whatever you need, but then it just became, like, he
00:31:39.360
wasn't trying anymore and was just backpacking off of whatever he could get from me and what
00:31:45.380
Do you think that with you having, you know, kind of the upper hand on a lot of things,
00:31:49.800
that it changed, like, maybe the attraction or, like, probably the dynamics of your relationship?
00:32:00.680
He got way clingier than he was beforehand, because I think he saw me kind of drifting
00:32:09.080
And so, he got extra clingy, and I was more distant and not really sure if I was feeling
00:32:14.840
So, it just kind of, like, kept pushing and pushing away until it was, like, I no longer
00:32:19.260
have love for you, or at least, like, you're not the same person that I was dating, you know?
00:32:25.880
To go back, you said that in your previous situations, you didn't really wait.
00:32:31.640
Maybe you'd wait, like, a week or something, but now you want to wait longer periods of
00:32:36.380
When you say, like, wait longer, what do you mean?
00:32:43.640
I mean, if it starts off, like, with the attraction and the idea of, I could date this person,
00:32:48.040
then I want to go on multiple dates, maybe after a month or so, a month or two.
00:32:53.520
But that depends on how much time you spend together.
00:32:55.620
Like, if you're only hanging out, like, once a week, then that time will be longer.
00:32:59.640
But if we're hanging out, like, every single day, it's going to feel, like, a lot longer
00:33:03.060
to get to know someone way quicker if you're spending every moment with them.
00:33:07.840
What if I told you that guys would feel, I don't know if disrespected is the right word,
00:33:16.160
but a lot of guys would take issue with, like, for example, say two weeks ago, you hooked
00:33:26.300
And then you meet the guy, and you're like, oh, I want to have a relationship with this
00:33:30.860
And then you're like, I'm going to make him wait three months.
00:33:33.820
A lot of guys are going to, like, see that if they know that you've had a different standard
00:33:38.640
They're going to be like, they're going to have an issue with it.
00:33:44.080
I think I mean also not just, like, sleep right away.
00:33:46.580
I also mean, like, I moved in with the people I was with, like, a month into dating, two months
00:33:51.620
My new rule is, like, let me date you for, like, a year before we get a place together
00:33:58.160
I wouldn't just say just sleeping with someone.
00:33:59.900
Also, I wouldn't be in that situation because I do not have one-night stands and haven't
00:34:07.740
So I don't think that situation would ever come up anyway.
00:34:14.720
How long do you guys think you should wait before having sex with somebody new?
00:34:19.720
We'll just start with you if you want to reiterate.
00:34:21.780
I'm down to wait, like, three weeks, three, four, depending on how often we're hanging
00:34:30.120
I don't like a blanket exact time frame or date.
00:34:35.860
I really think it's about feeling out the person.
00:34:38.400
But I do not encourage any of my clients to have sex too early or if they're not ready
00:34:46.640
As far as, like, actually getting into a relationship, one thing I do know as far as, like, time frames
00:34:53.620
that seem to work out pretty close in line across the board is, like, if he's not committed
00:34:59.940
into a relationship within, like, two, three months maximum, he's just not going to.
00:35:04.980
There are always exceptions to the rule, but never assume that you're one.
00:35:08.860
And so as far as, like, having sex, I can't put a time frame on it.
00:35:14.080
It's really how often are you communicating with them?
00:35:20.220
I mean, just properly vetting him is the best advice that I could give.
00:35:28.820
It's really hard to just give a blanket statement without knowing the person, knowing how much
00:35:33.360
they're talking, and knowing what that woman specifically is really dealing with.
00:35:43.280
If I'm really into you and I want to have sex, we're going to have sex, basically.
00:35:48.820
And if you fuck me and then leave and you weren't ready for a relationship, that's fine, too.
00:35:54.300
So I'm not going to pressure you into anything.
00:36:00.120
I don't think you necessarily have to put, like, a time stamp on it, because even if it's,
00:36:03.600
like, three months down the line, you're not feeling it.
00:36:05.940
So it's just kind of whenever the sexual tension and things like that.
00:36:10.880
That's what I was going to say, was it depends on the tension.
00:36:14.860
I like to wait until the tension really, really builds.
00:36:20.580
Whenever that tension is, you can't ignore it, then that's when it's good to happen.
00:36:33.980
Like, sometimes it's just, like, you get teased with cuddles and whatever and nice dates and flowers
00:36:40.300
or whatever for so long until you're, like, ah, please.
00:36:48.080
So, with the current guy that you're seeing now, how long did you wait with him?
00:37:05.740
Like, you know, you could be seeing someone for a month and hang out two times.
00:37:09.180
Or you could be seeing someone for two weeks and hung out, like, three or four times a week, you know?
00:37:29.040
If he really does pursue that, then I'm, like, okay.
00:37:38.880
Well, we're both waiting until, like, I know that he's sure and then I know that I'm sure as well.
00:37:45.840
And, like, your decision, which is really beautiful and not always that common, you know?
00:37:50.500
Some guys are like, well, I'm not going to get it, then bye.
00:37:53.380
If they can actually wait and respect, like, if you want to wait, that's just kind of shows their character.
00:37:58.240
But is that disrespectful for a guy to say, well, if you don't want to have sex with me, then we're on a different timeline, goodbye.
00:38:04.220
If that's not what they want, if that's what they want, sure.
00:38:07.080
Well, earlier you said, well, you wish that guys could be up front about what they want.
00:38:13.300
Yeah, but if it's, like, come to a time and he's like, okay, it's been too long, and she said, well, I told you already, I wanted to wait.
00:38:19.040
And if he's already had it, then that's still him.
00:38:23.480
And I've had guys tell me, like, I'm just a very touchy person, I'm a sexually active person, and I'm like, okay, well, then you're just not a person for me, if that makes sense.
00:38:51.220
Okay, so you and your boyfriend, you're waiting till marriage?
00:38:57.040
I am waiting till marriage as well, so I think that the best thing to do is to wait till marriage.
00:39:01.680
I think that when you have it too soon, you kind of risk the relationship.
00:39:08.300
I think there's, you know, like a certain amount of respect, you know, that comes with having to wait.
00:39:13.600
I think that as a woman, one thing for me, if I can know that he is willing to wait for me, and not just wait for me, but wait till our wedding night, then I know that he is in for the long haul, and I know how he feels about me.
00:39:28.060
So, I mean, it's not even just, you know, like about my faith, it's ultimately about if I want to give this relationship the absolute best chance that I can, then I think that we have to establish some kind of foundation.
00:39:44.680
And I think that, ultimately, I think that waiting till marriage is what people should do.
00:39:54.320
But, of course, there's always, you know, there's always regrets, and so, yeah.
00:40:03.800
Do you expect the man to be, to have the same mentality, like to wait for marriage as well?
00:40:14.440
So, will you pursue someone that has had sex before?
00:40:25.080
And how long are you waiting to, like, like if there was a time frame, like, you're going to be engaged for a year, you want to date for three years, like, what does that look like?
00:40:40.000
It ultimately kind of just depends on, I think, the person.
00:40:46.340
I don't know if I have met him yet, but when I meet him, I know that I'll know because of how, you know, how he respects me,
00:40:54.100
and how ultimately, you know, his faith comes first, and if his faith comes first as well, if he is ultimately submitted to God, then I'm able to submit to him, and we're able to wait for each other.
00:41:09.940
So do you think if he wants to have sex with you, it's kind of, like, disrespectful?
00:41:14.160
Would you, like, would you take that the wrong way?
00:41:17.580
I mean, I would want him, you know, I would want him to want to have sex with me, but I would want him to wait.
00:41:25.100
I would want him to have the self, you know, control and, you know, the willpower to be able to hold off because I think there's a certain amount of respect.
00:41:34.240
There's a certain amount of, you know, like, value in something that you have to wait for it, you know?
00:41:41.760
It takes a long time for that pearl, you know, to become something, and it's inside of a clam, and it's not until you open it.
00:41:54.400
Is it vaginal penetration that you would consider sex, or is oral sex still on the table?
00:42:03.920
Like, would you, you know, like, go down on him before you married him?
00:42:29.060
Like, did you find God after the situation happened with the Australian guy?
00:42:37.600
Or did you just find God and decide this is the path you want to go down?
00:42:45.700
It's, you know, there's been certain points in my life where my faith has very much slacked.
00:42:55.280
And then there's been times when it's picked up.
00:42:58.820
But overall, God has always been constant in my life.
00:43:04.400
There's nothing else that I would ever do that I think...
00:43:09.700
At this point in my life, I'm not going to choose just any man.
00:43:14.260
I can't because I know exactly what it is, who I want.
00:43:20.120
And whether or not I find him is not really up to me.
00:43:29.420
I just want to make sure I'm, like, targeting...
00:43:36.560
Like, would you consider oral sex, like, also saving yourself for marriage something?
00:43:40.760
But, like, you said you're saving yourself for marriage, too, right?
00:43:58.940
I'd be like, can you just put it in and we can fall asleep like that?
00:44:03.920
It didn't always end up working, but, like, maybe twice.
00:44:12.960
I'd be like, can you just fall asleep with it in?
00:44:18.540
No, it's not hard, and then it slowly gets soft.
00:44:24.840
No, it's really intimate and kind of cute, but it honestly doesn't always last like that.
00:44:34.060
But then it doesn't always end up as just soaking, but...
00:44:37.820
I feel like it's, like, Kegels kind of, like, trying to keep it in there.
00:44:39.920
Well, soaking is, like, putting it in and letting it sit there while someone else is, like,
00:44:49.980
It's different, and then we would just use soaking as a term for when we wanted to do it.
00:45:14.320
Yeah, it's just anything that involves, like, lust.
00:45:20.440
And so I would include anything that's, like, sexually immoral.
00:45:24.140
And so that would include, like, oral sex, anal sex, like, all of that.
00:45:31.320
So just going back to the whole, like, how long should you wait thing.
00:45:39.680
Because one-night stand means something kind of very specific.
00:45:42.240
Have you ever slept with someone, maybe, the first time ever meeting them?
00:45:54.500
Well, yeah, but, I mean, like, more, like, with a civilian, let's say.
00:46:03.380
Yeah, I'm too scared of STDs, or they could be a serial killer, or they could be, I don't
00:46:11.060
None of you have been, like, at a party or a club, and you met a guy.
00:46:17.740
I'm always with my girlfriends, and they would.
00:46:24.300
The other thing, Keep, that you had, I wish I could just meet someone in the park or coffee
00:46:27.960
shop, like a fairy tale, but I know real life isn't like that.
00:46:34.860
Just the idea of, like, sitting there, like, studying, or, like, on a video, or doing something
00:46:40.340
on your phone, drinking a coffee, and someone comes by and just, like, starts up some banter.
00:46:46.120
Like, that's just, like, the classic movie trope that, of course, like, a Hallmark movie,
00:46:51.620
you know, that is ideal, but I know it's not realistic, but.
00:46:56.160
Who here would prefer to meet someone organically, like, in person, instead of, like, a dating
00:47:03.560
You know, the meet cute, or whatever the fuck it's called.
00:47:06.020
They'd come to you, up to you at Trader Joe's, or, you know, at the park, or at the beach.
00:47:19.740
Well, just to, okay, I'm going to come back to that really quick.
00:47:22.480
I do want to ask, because I forgot to ask this earlier.
00:47:25.480
Those of you who do OF, you, you, you, you, what kind of, you don't have to be specific,
00:47:32.020
but do you do solo content, GG, BG, so girl, girl, boy, girl?
00:47:37.580
I do solo content, and I've done a video with an ex before, which is one.
00:47:45.700
And if I do ones with girls, it's not, like, girl, girl content, it's more like, ooh, jump
00:47:50.660
around with their boobies or something, like, not, like, hardcore intense stuff, really.
00:47:54.980
But you have done one or some BG content with an ex?
00:48:07.460
I haven't done boy, girl, but girl, girl, for sure.
00:48:16.200
Okay, coming back to you, so you were given quite a head nod there.
00:48:26.360
But, I mean, were you doing one-on-one scenes with men?
00:48:54.260
15 is the most guys, but I've done 16 in an orgy as far as, like, men and women.
00:49:22.040
And so, just to bring it back to your thing, and maybe show of hands also from the girls,
00:49:26.480
you said that, I wish I could just meet someone in the park or coffee shop like a fairy tale,
00:49:36.640
Would you prefer to meet someone organically, kind of more, like, meet cute, meet in a park,
00:49:45.960
Well, for you guys specifically, don't you think that the fairy tale thing would be for
00:49:58.640
Like, at least if you're honest about it, and they have a problem with it, then that's
00:50:11.320
I haven't dated a man since freshman year in high school, and there's countless of them
00:50:21.360
But do you think that they would want to marry someone like that?
00:50:35.040
I've never met a single person who didn't, didn't, like, who cared, I guess.
00:50:42.240
I've never met a single man who's cared about it.
00:50:45.160
The people that I've tried dating before or gone on dates before, none of them cared.
00:50:53.820
They said, if it empowers you and if you're making money and you're supporting your family,
00:50:58.240
I have very struggling parents, so I support my parents with my money.
00:51:07.900
Or do you think men have ever lied to you to get laid?
00:51:11.920
Because I don't let just anyone have sex with me.
00:51:13.700
I mean, I'm a guy, and I know men frequently will lie to get laid, so they'll gas you up.
00:51:26.700
So I've honestly never had those questions, either.
00:51:29.500
I've never questioned it once, because if I did and I could tell that they weren't being honest,
00:51:34.780
I feel like I have a pretty good radar, and I just wouldn't let them.
00:51:39.300
Well, okay, before I continue on with that thread for a little bit.
00:51:43.700
But why can't, you know, you often, I mean, you said that you'd like to meet someone in the park or coffee shop.
00:52:01.480
I would if I could, and sometimes I'll, like, have a couple drinks or, like, I'll have a cocktail,
00:52:06.000
and I'll be, like, go up to someone, say they're cute, get their number, talk on Instagram for a little bit,
00:52:10.280
and then I won't really follow through, because, I don't know, things come up or whatever, but I'm more shy.
00:52:16.520
So if I have someone that can come up and talk to me and start some banter and chat with me,
00:52:22.280
and I enjoy it and they get my number, then even better, because then in the future,
00:52:26.780
if I'm too shy to make a move or whatever, then they can take the reins, I guess.
00:52:35.820
Would you, maybe you want someone to approach you in the Trader Joe's, park, coffee shop?
00:52:50.460
It's as simple as just, it's simply just, you're really attractive, and that's it.
00:52:55.800
Like, it doesn't have to be like, a lot of guys will, specifically guys, will come up
00:53:00.960
and be like, you're really attractive, like, can I get your number?
00:53:04.500
It has to be, I have more respect for a guy if he's just like, I just want to let you know
00:53:11.420
That says so much more than a guy being like, let me get your snap.
00:53:22.260
So, you want to meet a guy in public organically, but you also want him to just compliment
00:53:38.280
It could lead to, like, someone pulling a gun at you.
00:53:38.940
If I'm in LA, and I approach a girl somewhere, like, I'm never seeing her again.
00:53:47.960
I would say that's so disappointing when, like, a really attractive guy, or even if they're
00:53:51.860
cool or not, comes over, and they compliment you, and then you don't hear from them, and
00:53:55.520
it's like, wait, I didn't get your information.
00:54:00.980
It feels good, and you're like, oh, I just got a compliment, but then you, like, look back,
00:54:04.860
and you're like, what if they were really cool, and we could have hit it off?
00:54:08.820
I mean, there are also situations where, like, the only time I've really hit on a guy is
00:54:12.280
if, like, he's my waiter, and I just leave my number.
00:54:15.560
Or, like, it doesn't need to be super in your face.
00:54:18.800
Like, it can just be, like, hey, like, I thought you were really good looking.
00:54:35.420
So, I don't do it, and I don't advise that people do it.
00:54:39.880
If they're, if you're looking for, so it can go deep.
00:54:43.680
For me personally, and a lot of the women that I coach, like, we all have masculine and
00:54:48.820
feminine energy within us, but me personally, like, I'm more of a core feminine energy,
00:54:56.480
So, essentially, masculine energy is more of the initiator, and at most I would, like,
00:55:04.240
look in a guy's direction and smile, and if he doesn't initiate and come converse, then
00:55:19.180
I'm just not going to, because you have no idea what, are they single?
00:55:25.840
Are they really, truly interested in anything more than sex?
00:55:29.700
All those things you just listed are things that men would face, too.
00:55:38.000
Well, that's not a very good reason to not approach, then.
00:55:40.280
Yeah, I think women should be a little bit more cautious in general, and this is a blanket
00:55:44.240
statement, because we have all gender spectrums.
00:55:48.160
We have all sexualities, but just for sake and ease of conversation, as far as straight,
00:55:54.540
I'm going to just use straight male, female example.
00:56:00.100
But I just, I feel like a lot of women have been in a situation like her, and I have been
00:56:06.960
in the past, too, where you're with a guy, and it may start out initially okay, and a
00:56:11.760
little, the reciprocity is there, but over time, you get more in your masculine energy,
00:56:17.340
and he gets more in his feminine energy, and he is sloughing.
00:56:20.140
This is just, her example is a little bit, a good extreme example of sloughing off on the
00:56:25.060
bills, or maybe he's playing video games, or maybe he wants you to be the breadwinner.
00:56:28.560
And there's nothing wrong with the roles being reversed, but I think in general, it's best
00:56:35.040
if you are wanting a man who is a bit more in his masculine energy of provider, protector,
00:56:44.320
initiator, then I think it's best to just start out from day one.
00:56:51.000
So if you're the initiator, it oftentimes is with a man who's more in his unbalanced
00:57:01.020
There are those situations that are reality, but I just don't think that they are the norm.
00:57:09.040
But because I've spoken to so many women, and they're wanting more of that man to be in
00:57:14.580
his core masculine energy, which does not mean he's hugely in his masculine energy, and you
00:57:20.320
have to be submissive and just do whatever he says.
00:57:24.220
Maybe, I know this may sound a bit robotic, but just for sake of explaining it, oh, I would
00:57:32.800
consider myself 60, 70% more in my feminine energy, and I'm looking for somebody who is
00:57:38.080
60, 70% more in their masculine energy, because I think over the long term, that can go the
00:57:44.660
distance, and not in a codependent way, where the woman is extremely in her feminine energy,
00:57:49.600
and the man is extremely in his masculine energy, or vice versa, and there's control dynamics
00:58:02.820
So would you call a man who's just shy feminine?
00:58:08.080
Because that's not in his natural, like, it's just not in his personality to initiate some,
00:58:13.780
like, I just feel like some men are just a little bit more, you know, conservative, and
00:58:17.500
they just keep to themselves, but I don't feel like that makes them feminine, and I feel
00:58:22.960
Yeah, I don't have, I really just stray hugely away from blanket statements.
00:58:27.440
Masculine isn't just like, oh, masculine, and like, feminine is just dainty either.
00:58:33.200
If he's a bit more hesitant to initiate, you could say he either is, it's all dependent,
00:58:45.300
he either is essentially meant to match with a woman who is more comfortable and wants to
00:58:50.120
stay more in her masculine energy and is just more of that dominant role, or maybe more of
00:58:54.220
a 50-50 type of relationship, which in my personal opinion is rare, and so no, I wouldn't, like,
00:59:04.320
just, I wouldn't shame him or, like, even say that he's necessarily feminine, no.
00:59:10.700
But if he is looking to be in his masculine energy more so, and have a partner that is
00:59:17.760
a bit more in her feminine energy, then it's, I mean, that's something that has to grow and
00:59:32.920
Okay, so, to bring it back here, we were talking about the, what was it, the freaking,
00:59:46.900
Oh, meeting someone in public, blah, blah, blah.
00:59:51.660
What you were saying that you haven't encountered, like, any guys at all who've had any issue with
01:00:01.560
I think one of my exes, he didn't have any problem with me doing content, he just didn't
01:00:06.200
want me to film with other guys or film explicit with other girls, and I respected that and
01:00:12.940
And then I dated someone who was, like, do whatever you want, I still didn't want to film
01:00:15.960
with other guys, but I would do things with girls, and he was, like, I know you're not
01:00:19.460
attracted to girls in that way, so do your thing.
01:00:23.460
And there's definitely, I think, a subset of men that, when it comes to shorter-term relationships
01:00:27.640
or even, like, a relation, like, long-term relationship, they're okay with it, but, and
01:00:34.480
maybe some of you don't want this, but I've definitely heard from a lot of men that when
01:00:38.400
it comes to, like, marriage, having kids, that's when the problem really manifests itself.
01:00:46.860
I'm sure you have no problem finding men to have sleep with or even have relationships
01:00:54.060
I went long-term, and I also plan to hopefully retire before I have kids and get married,
01:00:59.860
and by that time, I won't be doing this anymore, and I'll be able to have passive income from
01:01:04.980
whether it's, like, houses or real estate or something that I can invest in, so I don't
01:01:09.080
have to do this forever, but right now, I enjoy what I'm doing.
01:01:13.680
I'm seeing parts of the country I've never seen before, I'm supporting family, I'm supporting
01:01:18.340
myself, and supporting the future that I plan to have.
01:01:25.960
Yeah, and I'm sure it's been very financially rewarding, and don't shoot the messenger here,
01:01:30.400
but there's definitely a pretty substantial subset of men that when it comes to long-term relationships,
01:01:37.160
marriage, and having kids, like, it's kind of a suboptimal choice to pick someone who
01:01:50.620
And, look, you're still, like, there's a lot of sims out there that are going to be fine
01:01:55.400
It's more of, like, in my head, it's like, you can't bake your cake and eat it, too.
01:02:04.660
I'm not going to sit here and be like, oh, I can't wait to find the man.
01:02:12.880
Like, I could, you know, people plan for 10 years down the road, I want to get married,
01:02:24.500
And if that means in five years I have a man, I have a man.
01:02:29.140
Like, it's not like I'm going to dwell on the fact that I, oh, I don't have a boyfriend.
01:02:34.040
And I, to add to that, I very much believe that wherever I'm going to end up, wherever
01:02:40.220
I'm supposed to end up, whether that's with somebody, whether it's not, I'm going to end
01:02:45.360
There's nothing I can do to not get myself there, and especially with my goals that I
01:02:54.420
Let's do a couple super chats here, unless anyone has any additional things to add.
01:03:01.320
But to the girl in the hat, I never S with the woman who I know was Mary slash girlfriend.
01:03:07.860
I've turned down 40 plus women for that reason.
01:03:15.040
I think I was just like, every, he said something saying that he gets a lot of like women with
01:03:25.320
The chest tattoo girl is talking pure pseudoscience.
01:03:50.260
Red Scare Girls, is that like a communist thing or something?
01:04:47.500
I don't really think so, just because people see...
01:04:50.520
It's like judging a book by its cover, so you see something.
01:04:52.960
You might be super into it, or hormones, or whatever is going on in your body.
01:04:59.600
And then you can hear them talk and be like, never mind.
01:05:12.160
I think most of the time when people explain love at first sight, they're just going based
01:05:15.720
off of physical attraction or some kind of chemistry or something along those lines.
01:05:27.060
Because I believe I found my person, my love, but he's literally my best friend.
01:05:31.400
So that's what I'm asking, like, does it have to be, like, sexual, I guess, in a way?
01:05:39.600
Because he's literally my, like, he's my soulmate.
01:06:16.600
So at first, were you romantically interested, and then you found out he was gay, and you were
01:06:35.160
We knew it before he could call himself out and be like, yes, I'm gay.
01:06:45.740
And then later came out, it's like, yeah, I like men.
01:07:07.520
I think it's possible, but not necessarily likely.
01:07:33.000
These OF girls are so full of it, I can't even believe.
01:07:35.920
I've known so many OF, and they all put it out in 20 minutes.
01:07:42.920
Put it out in 20 minutes like fuck in 20 minutes.
01:07:52.800
Never been a single one of my friends who does OF that would ever put out in 20 minutes.
01:07:56.960
They might flirt with someone, but they won't take them to bed afterwards.
01:08:02.920
If anyone here at the table did fuck someone within 20 minutes, would you admit to it?
01:08:23.500
You said your ex-boyfriend, who you were financially supporting in a $5,000 a month apartment, was
01:08:30.460
I guarantee you, him and his fraternity bros were fucking chicks within 20 minutes.
01:08:45.100
I think there's so many different types of people ever.
01:08:46.900
Maybe there are some OF girls who do that, but not a single one of my OF friends would
01:08:58.120
My friends will go out and party, and they'll flirt all night, and then they'll just go home
01:09:01.620
alone, and they won't go home with the guys that are begging them to go home.
01:09:05.860
And I know that because I'm sitting in the bathtub waiting for them to get back from the club.
01:09:09.580
None of you here, or maybe you specifically, have ever known a girl who's had a one-night
01:09:33.480
You don't categorize anything at all, but definitely, I know people who haven't, like,
01:09:41.600
One-night stand can be hung out with them all night.
01:09:45.620
Do we know, have we ever done a one-night stand?
01:09:50.660
We know people who've done them, but we, I don't know who says they did or not, but-
01:09:57.960
I have some friends, and they can do what they want, but it's not me.
01:10:02.920
Ask the ladies to rate their looks on a scale of one to ten.
01:10:13.620
No, I don't want to say hi and then get roasted, and I don't want to say low.
01:10:24.220
These boys love to say, what do you think you are?
01:10:32.820
You just don't take it personally, what they say.
01:10:46.480
So, do you want to just, instead of a troll answer, do you want to actually-
01:10:56.400
Yeah, I think there's so many more beautiful women in the world, and I think I'm okay.
01:11:06.780
Your own self-assessment of your physical attractiveness is quite crucial when it comes
01:11:12.140
If you think you're hot shit, if you think you're a ten, whether you're a guy or a girl,
01:11:16.480
this happens more so to men, but you're going to face plant into reality.
01:11:20.780
If you think you're hot shit, and you're not, reality is going to come.
01:11:37.280
You don't ask about emotional availability or maturity.
01:11:42.280
It's just, it's the same thing when guys ask, what do you bring to the table?
01:11:46.700
It's just, and even guys who know game will tell you this.
01:11:51.800
It's not coming from a man or a straight man, but men who know game know that it's essentially
01:11:56.820
a setup, and they're placing themselves above you and you below, and maybe, I'm not
01:12:02.000
saying all men that ask that question know that or are aware of that, but a lot of them
01:12:09.260
We're talking about dating, so it is kind of relevant to dating.
01:12:14.840
Because sometimes I'm like, oh my gosh, I feel like a 10 today.
01:12:34.260
Yeah, I don't give much energy to things that I don't think have much value, so I'm not
01:12:43.180
Rating looks I don't think really has much value.
01:12:46.080
Do you think looks is not an important factor when it comes to dating?
01:13:10.640
A man could still be shorter than you, and I assume you have a preference for the taller
01:13:23.920
Okay, so if you had a guy who's 5'1", next to a guy who's 6 feet, all things being equal,
01:13:34.680
...they're literally the exact same person, but a height difference would naturally be
01:13:39.280
Okay, so height matters, which is quite literally a measurement, a numerical measurement.
01:13:50.960
If the board, like, looks in general matter to most people, you can't get into a relationship.
01:14:02.660
But the only one there is Maddie, especially as she is sitting in the correct place, D.
01:14:19.920
I don't give energy to things I don't think are important like a rating scale.
01:14:25.020
But so you were saying that looks aren't that important?
01:14:28.220
Looks are, to an extent, for most people, important in dating.
01:14:31.700
But delegating it into this scale and asking it over and over, it's just, it's not, it's
01:14:44.600
But I do like to give people an opportunity to answer before I get into it.
01:14:51.820
To know how you're, where you land in the sexual or dating marketplace when it comes
01:15:00.600
Don't you think in order to have a fair assessment of the type of guy that you can get, you need
01:15:06.060
to have an accurate self-assessment of the type of woman you are when it comes to your
01:15:13.340
And you guys really only do the scale based on looks.
01:15:17.920
Availability and maturity and mentality, your daily life, whether you have integrity or
01:15:24.880
And the same old tired question is about looks.
01:15:28.060
It's just like, if you, this is what I, the issue here, the issue here is that you, it's
01:15:40.100
a dating podcast, but you're not really going any deeper than surface level on so many of
01:15:50.020
Well, speaking of surface level, um, well, hold on.
01:15:53.440
First off, I would just say to something that you'd said earlier, looks is, I would say the,
01:15:58.280
one of the ultimate things that matters when it comes to dating.
01:16:00.720
If you don't have physical attractiveness, nothing gets off the ground.
01:16:06.220
But, so you're saying that this question is perhaps superficial.
01:16:12.720
It's just, can you speak straight into the mic?
01:16:16.420
And you said it's, the conversations we have on the show is very surface level.
01:16:23.880
If you're, if you're looking for real change and not just entertainment and hits of entertainment
01:16:28.620
and feeding people's egos, then you're just giving the same old tired narrative.
01:16:36.700
You're not really helping people at large find a partner that is going to be solid for
01:16:44.820
them when you're just reiterating the same narrative on physical attractiveness.
01:16:49.780
It's the same question when men ask, what do you bring to the table?
01:17:02.240
I understand from like a more like superficial level what they're saying.
01:17:08.060
Like, is this connection going to be reciprocal?
01:17:10.500
But over time, men have started to ask this question to essentially have the woman already
01:17:17.960
like subservient and just essentially explaining what she has to offer.
01:17:24.580
Like, it's instead of getting to know somebody and not like drilling them with an unequal like
01:17:45.820
I'm not saying you don't get it a lot, especially now since it's been regurgitated, but since
01:17:52.560
it's been regurgitated over and over on a lot of these shows, of course you're going to get it.
01:17:55.780
Well, are you, hold on, this question that you're referring to, what do you bring to the
01:17:58.880
Are you talking within the context you're like one-on-one on a date with a guy?
01:18:05.740
So we are having, like, we can have meta conversations like this, but-
01:18:12.600
We're on a dating panel where we're talking about dating-related things.
01:18:15.940
It's within, I really had no intention of asking what you bring to the table, but perhaps
01:18:20.440
it's a good question I ought to ask, but we can bring it back to the rating thing.
01:18:25.140
Yeah, no, I'm just talking about dating in general.
01:18:27.400
I'm not talking about you asking me specifically, obviously.
01:18:34.580
I already know that he is, like, somewhat programmed by red pill rhetoric, and so it's
01:18:40.100
just, I'm not interested, because typically relationships end how they begin, and that's
01:18:50.100
A guy need not even be red pill to ask such a question.
01:18:54.780
A guy, like a normal dude who's never even heard about red pill.
01:18:58.060
A guy who's not even heard about red pill could ask somebody, so, like, what do you
01:19:04.700
It would be extremely rare before any of this rhetoric was spread.
01:19:12.640
But don't you expect when you're on a date and you're interested in a man that he has
01:19:21.280
Don't you expect him to bring something to the table?
01:19:24.200
So, therefore, don't you think that there should be some kind of equal...
01:19:33.520
Like, he has things that he wants, and he has things that he thinks, you know, like,
01:19:37.560
are good for his life, and some kind of woman that he's looking for.
01:19:41.540
So, therefore, isn't it a fair question to simply say, well, you know, you can phrase
01:19:50.660
Maybe it's not, what do you bring to the table?
01:20:01.840
Like, I think there's a lot of things that a woman can bring to the table, and therefore,
01:20:05.440
we should know that, and we should be able to say that when we're on a date.
01:20:13.440
I'm not, like, saying that this is necessarily, like, the worst thing ever when you're coming
01:20:23.480
But specifically, this community, and I get it.
01:20:29.080
But to, when men ask this question, I, it's already the little thread that essentially
01:20:36.380
is telling you that they're into this type of rhetoric.
01:20:41.540
The reason why men ask what women bring to the table is because society and women place
01:20:48.220
But women somehow believe she gets a free ride off of a man's hard work.
01:20:59.080
So nobody's assuming that they get a free ride off of a man's hard work.
01:21:04.700
This specific question, and I could say it over and over again, and it's...
01:21:11.080
So you, okay, you object to the 1 to 10 question.
01:21:25.680
Well, do you think representing yourself realistically is important?
01:21:32.140
Well, I mean, I noticed on your Instagram, almost every single photo of you has a face filter
01:21:38.160
Do you think that's inauthentic to be misrepresenting your physical appearance by using a face filter?
01:21:44.420
I'm not misrepresenting when it tells you that there's a face filter being used.
01:21:51.940
If somebody were to ask, do you use a face filter?
01:21:55.580
Why aren't you comfortable in your authentic self?
01:21:58.360
There are a lot of videos and photos where I have no face filters.
01:22:02.660
Okay, but most of them you're using a face filter.
01:22:04.900
Why aren't you just comfortable being your authentic self?
01:22:11.680
Why do you feel the need then to use face filters?
01:22:17.920
On the dating apps, do you post any photos which have you in a face filter?
01:22:25.540
Most of them are professional photos, so they're authentic.
01:22:34.120
Isn't that inauthentic to misrepresent your physical appearance?
01:22:42.280
Do I look shockingly completely different than I do on my Instagram?
01:22:49.980
But it's the same thing as, like, do women wear makeup?
01:22:55.500
Most of the time it's very apparent that they're wearing makeup.
01:23:02.800
It's a totally different thing than pretending to be somebody that you're not.
01:23:08.900
Like, you're mirroring to somebody what they want mentally, emotionally,
01:23:17.200
Sometimes I use occasional filters, as many women and people do.
01:23:26.400
But, like, I don't think, I know that I don't look very different than I do online.
01:23:32.340
Can you scoot your microphone that way just a bit?
01:23:35.220
Just, um, would you object to a guy lying about his height on a dating app?
01:23:48.720
Or is he, like, I don't know, maybe I'm 5'10", maybe I'm 5'9"?
01:24:02.580
Do you have any photos on your, any of your dating apps
01:24:09.720
Yes, I put one where it's just, like, no makeup, smiling,
01:24:14.080
Well, hot take here, like, if you're wearing a full face of makeup on a dating app,
01:24:17.140
you are kind of misrepresenting your physical attractiveness.
01:24:21.660
And you can tell that when women are wearing makeup most of the time.
01:24:25.600
It doesn't, whether men know that women wear makeup or not,
01:24:30.720
it doesn't change the impact, that initial visceral reaction
01:24:39.880
It doesn't, like, it doesn't change what the impact is having.
01:24:51.000
you're accusing this question of being very surface level and inauthentic,
01:24:55.220
but I just, I'm seeing if you're consistent in your demand for authenticity.
01:25:00.060
Yeah, I mean, I'm not being inauthentic by wearing a filter,
01:25:06.560
and here are other pictures of me not having a filter.
01:25:15.540
I've seen a lot of face filters, just in general,
01:25:20.900
Oh, face filters, yes, there are some very transformative face filters
01:25:25.900
where you look like a different person or you look like the opposite sex.
01:25:29.960
A lot of those, the opposite sex ones are different.
01:25:35.900
But okay, so I'll let the rest of the girls answer the question,
01:25:39.520
but I'll kind of address why I do think it is important
01:25:41.880
to have an accurate self-assessment of your own physical attractiveness,
01:25:45.900
and if you can break that down to a number, then I think it's fine.
01:26:08.420
So the reason I think it's important is, and I've said this already,
01:26:13.920
in order for you to be able to get a partner that's conceivably on your level,
01:26:18.900
you need to have a reasonable self-assessment of where you stand.
01:26:22.020
And I think it's the case, like, men aren't really getting gassed up in the same way
01:26:26.860
that women are going to get gassed up by society, by their friends.
01:26:30.320
Oh, my God, you look so amazing, but you're fucking 400 pounds overweight.
01:26:38.420
There are some guys who have a fetish, whatever.
01:26:42.320
Sometimes that's just, like, what they're into.
01:26:48.620
Appearance-wise, a lot of it is objective and subjective.
01:26:52.180
Like, instead of looking at objectively, like, what you are on a scale...
01:26:58.820
I could find one celebrity or one person, like, super attractive,
01:27:08.160
Like, people have types and tastes and whatnot,
01:27:10.840
but, I mean, there is an objective standard, though,
01:27:20.400
I just wanted to bring up that sometimes some people have, like,
01:27:35.260
That's what they would say is a 10 on their scale.
01:28:19.900
So there's plenty of guys that will sleep with you,
01:28:39.320
Well, women can shoot much higher out of their league
01:29:02.040
he needs to at least be physically attractive enough
01:29:43.660
that man has to be at least physically attractive enough
01:30:06.300
Like, are you saying they're gonna sleep with more attractive women
01:30:26.140
when it comes to casual sex or one-night stands
01:30:39.120
We're more likely to sleep with attractive women.
01:30:53.080
he has to at least be attractive enough physically
02:06:18.940
don't want a girl's broke it's a it's just a preference
02:25:07.300
does have self-control and i would argue that if you have self-control that makes
02:25:17.960
women have a greater urgency than men to attain a relationship
02:25:27.660
it is not men's fault because men are judged whether he succeeds
02:25:31.760
i think um sometimes it's hard to make the right choice though as a female
02:25:37.300
like you said earlier how guys can lie just to get into your pants
02:25:40.640
sure so you'll think you're making the right choice and they end up just doing
02:25:44.400
it to get another body on their roster so that they're looked up to because they
02:25:48.200
you know when reality what you were hoping for was something different and i think that
02:26:02.860
um okay thank you cole no no no hold on oh actually i'm not gonna play that thank you cole
02:26:11.440
appreciate it um also i don't know if you meant it this
02:26:15.540
way but when you said women gatekeep sex yeah because guys they want it and the girls can get
02:26:21.500
it but they gatekeep it i don't know if you mean it this way but it almost sounds like
02:26:25.000
because a woman doesn't want to have sex they're restricting sex but guys want it all the time and
02:26:31.000
we'll just give it and want it all the time but since we don't want to give it we're gatekeeping
02:26:35.560
it and gatekeeping is kind of a term that is usually like not the best thing like oh you have this
02:26:43.160
hair product that is going to make your hair amazing but you're gatekeeping it because you
02:26:46.840
don't want anyone else's hair to be amazing well i mean there there's certain there's different
02:26:51.260
definitions of being a what gatekeeping is but perhaps that's just a semantic uh difference
02:26:59.740
but basically gatekeeping is essentially you're the one who is controlling who gets to go in who
02:27:07.020
doesn't yeah you're at the gate you keep certain people out you allow access to certain people and i
02:27:14.940
feel like that makes sense for if it's if it is just a bunch of hungry men that want to have a bunch
02:27:20.540
of sex and add to their rosters if we have to be and choose the right person then we should be
02:27:25.100
gatekeeping if that is the case you know sure so this ties into what i forgot earlier is that i think a
02:27:32.380
lot of the issue is that it's this us versus them it reminds me of that spider-man emoji where they're
02:27:37.340
all just pointing at each other it's just this like divide and there's an argument for both sides
02:27:43.660
because i think about the same like analogies um of eve being able to be more manipulated and a man
02:27:52.140
being the leader and all that but it really unless you just want to go on and on for entertainment
02:27:56.860
purposes which is fine as far as education and healing and change and all of that we have to like
02:28:04.860
come together and less pointing the finger and that's just what i was thinking and also earlier you
02:28:09.820
were saying um me you were saying that um and i think it's just a matter of semantics honestly
02:28:17.420
because a lot of people like misdrew like masculine and feminine energies but a man like constantly just
02:28:24.620
leaking his sexual energy and like chasing women and again no judgment blame or shame on either side
02:28:30.620
shame and judgment and blame don't help again it just creates a bigger divide but that's not really
02:28:35.740
integrated masculine energy that's just like wounded masculine energy and i think that when we go
02:28:41.340
deeper into these layers i like the layers because we can actually just go beyond the surface and that's
02:28:49.900
kind of what i wanted to add on from earlier word i'm gonna re-trigger this and then i'll come back to
02:28:55.660
the whole hookup thing oh shit donated 99 this question is for camilla this is your ex cody
02:29:05.740
it's embarrassing that we had to break up because you wanted to start an only vans how do you even
02:29:11.740
live with yourself um cody we broke up my sophomore year of high school because you wanted to sleep with
02:29:18.700
guys your sex tape actually got leaked in high school so i don't know what you're talking about
02:29:24.620
um second of all i look really well i love my nighttime routine on the occasional wednesday
02:29:31.020
jack docker donated 99 kate is it pink i hope it's pink i wonder if it's pink can you tell me
02:29:38.860
if it's pink i really wanna know if it's pink is it pink bfr i hope it's pink
02:29:43.740
this has to be a joke subscribe to her only fans and you'll find out if it's pink i've seen it it's
02:29:50.380
pretty big oh and then we keep keep and uh your friend you guys have to take off that's so that's
02:29:57.340
fine i want to say bye that was a lot bye bye i love you bye so nice to meet you all let's collab
02:30:03.420
one yeah all right see you guys um we're gonna maybe move can you two move like take their seats
02:30:10.380
yeah so you can you sit there and then they'll have you sit where she was sitting yes do i move
02:30:16.380
them uh just leave them leave the mics leave the mics don't don't worry just
02:30:25.900
oh yeah that's fine the girls had to leave so we're gonna uh get them situated um wait so okay
02:30:33.260
the first thing there was big daddy i guess your ex was in the chat uh okay cody to be exact
02:30:40.220
and then jack doherty is love you jack oh in that seat wait let me see
02:30:46.540
can you be in that in that seat yeah we're gonna just readjust this
02:30:55.420
is this the guy who you're dating this is the guy who you're dating jack no no why is he asking if it's
02:31:03.340
pink he i assume he's talking about the pussy the okay wow we do uh like we know him we do like we
02:31:11.020
film videos with him he does his own content too yeah i've heard his name are you guys dating him
02:31:16.380
absolutely not he has a girlfriend mckinley mckinley oh he has a girlfriend my favorite people on the
02:31:20.860
earth but yeah they're great together well there you have it okay um is this like an inside joke or
02:31:26.700
something yeah well what i guess here we have uh we have something here from bordello girl hello
02:31:34.060
again lovely chat question for the panel in chat have you ever dated someone your total opposite and if
02:31:38.620
so what attracted you to them i need to get up really quick so if you guys want to go around the
02:31:41.740
table on this one go go ahead you can go first um my total opposite
02:31:50.060
i don't think so i think that's probably the flaw that i have is i go for people that are just like me
02:31:55.500
like just a lot of energy and i feel like i should stop doing that so definitely not
02:32:04.780
my mind just goes to like what in what sense opposite um like when i was younger in my early
02:32:11.580
20s i was dating people who were probably like energetically my opposite i was kind of
02:32:18.780
operating a bit more in my masculine energy and them and their feminine won't get too deep into that
02:32:24.460
but um physically i mean in what sense i guess so i'm not gonna go on about that i'll pass it over
02:32:32.860
um yes short answer i usually go for like i said earlier guys who have strengths in the in the areas
02:32:43.580
that i lack and vice versa just because i feel like it makes it run smoother and it's just by default
02:32:51.980
um looks and occupation i guess and what they like to do no i'd say someone who's who shares common
02:33:03.340
interests would definitely be somebody that i'm interested in um wait is it did i ask have you ever
02:33:13.420
dated one anyone who's like been the opposite of you and what attract what did you find attractive
02:33:19.340
um about that i wouldn't i would say no my first relationship i thought we were the same but it
02:33:27.340
ended up that we were complete opposites but i was not attracted to that at all so i wouldn't say
02:33:33.100
that i have ever done that um so i i always try to stick with people that have the same values as me as
02:33:40.460
much as possible yeah for myself um i would say opposite in some ways um maybe opposite in personality
02:33:49.740
to a certain extent but um that would really be all because i prioritize my values and my beliefs and
02:33:58.540
that would be those would have to be the same um i wouldn't say i've dated anyone that's the opposite
02:34:06.380
of me but the opposite of like what i look for in a person and it didn't really go well so all right
02:34:13.420
there you have it let me get some of these chats we have puffy vegas starting with the brown haired girl
02:34:17.740
ending in 778 6.5 776 7 7.5 that's obviously came through before the other girls left uh we have
02:34:27.900
puffy i think i'm a 10 out of 10 girls rate me i have 57 million views on youtube channel no filters
02:34:34.380
i've interviewed over 1 000 women all beautiful and i never use a filter once p.s i'm a 40 i'm 48 with a
02:34:41.020
dad bod girl in 20s date him i guess uh the girl with the tattoos would never in a million years
02:34:48.380
be she's beyond delusional to think that i'm high that i'm high value man like me would be with her
02:34:56.140
okay puffy vegas maybe we can arrange a date i guess um we have blake wilson i would say that
02:35:02.780
what each person brings to the table is not surface level example support care encourage self-growth
02:35:08.380
and this is our lives each party should display value in the other's life equally ps miss in the
02:35:14.300
front right corner let's go out hashtag gorgeous fortunately she left um she had to leave but blake
02:35:21.820
thank you so much uh for your super chat much appreciated is there a bug in here uh and then we
02:35:27.980
have stefan i will donate my life savings for caitlin camilla to show their toes on camera also caitlin
02:35:33.820
please tell me if it's pink is this like what is it what is this pink thing what the fuck i don't
02:35:38.540
know i think it's because we did a bit where it's like i have a phone and i go up to right in person
02:35:44.460
and i'm like hey um don't talk to the mic and i'll let you see the rest of this picture and it's
02:35:49.900
like a blurred picture of me like on my of or whatever what's the one time it just depends
02:35:55.580
whatever the editors want to put on there um and someone was like oh my gosh like as a joke
02:36:02.940
it's like oh my gosh it's pink as a joke and now it's just a running thing um yeah yeah here's
02:36:10.540
another one haram hey guys let me see those okay um how much i guess they're asking how much for a
02:36:18.700
foot check link in ig bio yeah or just venmo me link in my instagram no they're asking how much they
02:36:25.660
have to pay me pay you to see my that's right this is the reverse the reverse why are they paying you
02:36:32.620
to see my feet that doesn't make sense it makes a lot of sense to me can i have you uh tilt the
02:36:37.100
microphone up towards you so it's like straight up straight up uh can you tilt the microphone a
02:36:40.780
little bit so brian's your pimp now yeah no that's right p-i-n-p dirt my fucking shoulder off
02:36:47.660
okay we have camilla is more pink than caitlin's no way you're paying for this there's no way you guys
02:36:55.740
probably had this set up so they would do this by the way guys guys get your chats in now if you
02:37:00.860
want to because we are uh i'm not going to talk about it but we have to wrap at 10 tonight so we
02:37:06.940
got about 20 20 ish minutes 25 minutes left uh so if you want get your chats in now because this is
02:37:13.100
going to be one of our shortest shows in a very very very long time so get them in guys um well i got
02:37:21.180
a question since this is kind of relevant like in your rowdy huh huh what'd you say in your outie
02:37:27.580
huh huh oh were you asking me yeah well both of you because the any
02:37:35.420
what are you going to ask for proof now caitlin also any if i'm i mean i don't know if y'all prefer
02:37:42.940
that but unfortunately why is that a sad thing you know what archie bunker you know what will be
02:37:49.740
interesting ask the panel to rate their intelligence from one to ten there we go is
02:37:55.100
that i don't feel like having oh there it is holy shit there's a lot coming in biologically men want
02:38:01.740
to spread seed first if you make it easy for any group or status of man then they have no reason to
02:38:07.740
deny biologically women seek protection social and financial security and family i agree both need more
02:38:15.900
value and responsibility yes word thank you mayor more appreciated we have another one coming in um
02:38:22.780
intelligence anybody who who here's a 10 in intelligence obviously the whole table right
02:38:29.740
okay sorry bro they don't want to get 100 sorry for miscommunication i wanted to see the host's feet
02:38:37.340
wouldn't be opposed to caitlin's too bro i'm i'm pricey i'm pricey i'm not doing it for free i am
02:38:44.780
expensive you want to see my feet are you talking about madison no i'll split it with you please show
02:38:51.100
your feet uh you'll split the money with me yeah please if i show my i'll give you i'll give you 30
02:39:06.780
the whole thousand one no because once they no not for 30 come on one toe come on you do it if there
02:39:16.300
wasn't a million people watching you do it you do it i don't think madison would do it i think you
02:39:20.780
would i i do have a wiki feet but not bro some weirdos please describe a wiki feet no just some
02:39:26.380
like weirdos you can look up people uploaded my feet to wiki feet it's so how did they get your
02:39:32.540
feet i got like instagram photos there's a picture of your surfing there's a picture of me surfing
02:39:36.540
and my feet are visible do you get pedicures out no oh why the how many guys do you a lot a lot
02:39:43.580
of people get pedicures oh my gosh you need to get a pedicure you'll never go back word then you
02:39:48.380
could really let's have if you want to scoot over maybe i don't know um hey gang was looking for a
02:39:53.340
few feet and cooch picks myself a lot for filming and editing service all right these guys are trolling
02:39:57.980
there you have it that is cool um uh okay so we had we had some videos to react to um
02:40:05.180
shit there let me just double check everything here uh okay we're gonna do that we we did all that
02:40:11.020
one sec guys i'm just making sure we hit most of the points um okay yeah let's let's react to the
02:40:25.420
video so you before you pull it up um nick wait did we get through all the uh chats here yeah i think
02:40:32.140
we did um you guys do tick tock shit christ we actually i think that's how i found you i think
02:40:39.820
i messaged you right and i i on my for you page or whatever one of your tick tocks came up and it
02:40:44.620
was uh it was interesting it was an interesting one so uh we're gonna we're gonna react to your
02:40:49.260
tick tock three of them we have three of them they're all pretty much the same just mine just
02:40:53.100
yours why just mine i like to pick on people when just kidding um yeah she's she's uh in the clear
02:40:59.340
really i'm in the clear nothing she's in the clear i'll bet i didn't do a huge deep dive but
02:41:05.500
well you found that instagram picture i don't know how which one the one on the cover i haven't seen
02:41:10.220
that picture in like over a year that was impressive i think it's you don't have that
02:41:14.060
many posts on your instagram i was looking for better ones by the way let's just go oh thanks
02:41:19.020
all right um nick if you can pull up the first video okay go ahead and press play oh
02:41:25.820
shit how tall are you pause it's too loud too loud too loud uh lower it lower it lower it uh
02:41:34.860
scroll it back start from the beginning baby k baby okay go ahead how tall are you like uh five
02:41:41.260
eight i hope on the edge of that for me please no why not why are you trying to get me on blast dude
02:41:47.900
just super quick i'm like five six all right oh so now you're changing it you got me um so you're
02:41:56.300
you're five five okay it's okay we still love our short kings next one control tab over all right
02:42:03.260
play this one how tall are you five eight five eight yeah are you sure yes i'm five eight okay caitlin
02:42:09.580
if you're gonna step on the um edge of that for me that'd be really really nice come on
02:42:17.500
you're um you're five six oh for real yes oh i thought i was five eight you thought how'd you
02:42:23.420
think that i don't know somebody told me holy guys is it you're basically six foot though you round up
02:42:29.900
okay thank you yeah you're welcome next next next lower the volume a little bit i think it's peaking
02:42:36.620
well you can play it how tall are you five eight five eight okay are you sure about that are you
02:42:45.260
sure about that i'm positive okay can you confirm or deny no sir you're five six i'm not five six
02:42:53.020
you're five five i'm not five five no she's probably five five she's actually four eleven oh
02:42:58.140
god so you're definitely five five i guess i'm just curious um how much do you weigh 115. like 112 i think
02:43:14.140
uh last time i checked like 97. like 109. 120. 102. i have a a scale here so what i think we're gonna do
02:43:25.900
we need to confirm if like weight so um i think where do we set this up at i think we honestly uh
02:43:33.020
where do we do it hmm oh get out of frame yeah get out what are you doing camila okay
02:43:39.020
holy expo oh shit it got all scuffed it with the exposure um was this this one i feel like was i need
02:43:45.580
a my camera was all up on this um okay i think we're gonna do it hold on i'm gonna get up i haven't weighed
02:43:52.220
myself in a long time but i like weighing myself i feel like it's like like i'm i kind of look fine
02:43:57.580
so it's like okay i feel like i am like yeah okay 125 yeah so it kind of i don't know i don't know
02:44:04.700
i'm actually curious myself so if we could all right so can you see we're getting he's gonna add like
02:44:11.740
wait to it be like yep you're 250. what did you say 115. checks out wow whoa did you think she lied
02:44:22.780
exactly she's 118 guys whoa whoa whoa okay what about you let's have you do it wait is that like a bath
02:44:31.740
thing like are you saying what was that how tall are you he's he's he's gonna say you're like lying
02:44:36.860
about your way or whatever oh my gosh yeah okay okay okay make sense make sense four pounds off
02:44:44.140
it's always up and down okay what about you check it out 97 98. oh my how much stay still stay still 103
02:44:58.460
no actually he caught my ass he's gonna do a lap around the gotcha
02:45:01.980
all right i'm not gonna have everybody do it but uh man you guys are shameless i feel like it's
02:45:09.500
really easy to tell when a man's under five five you guys are lying about your weight darn what's up
02:45:15.660
there guys it is a hard surface gentlemen it's a fucking i don't know what it is all right there
02:45:22.300
you have it um i just thought that was funny 118 and close that's the equivalent guys that's the
02:45:29.740
equivalent i wasn't offended by that okay that's fine i actually that was i'm just i guess what i
02:45:35.980
am saying though is like a lot of women would be kind of salty i'm not like a lot of women like i feel
02:45:41.100
like if you did that on tick tock and you you asked a woman her weight and you were like oh well
02:45:46.460
here's a scale yeah they freak out but if you ask you either why you get canceled why you get
02:45:50.860
canceled why but didn't i know what i weigh right now no just stay stay stay stay stay we're we're
02:45:57.020
done with a bit um huh no like a uh you get canceled like tick tock is very camilla if you ever come
02:46:07.420
everyone's so sensitive now i'm 26 i own a construction business uh camilla if you ever come to
02:46:12.220
pensacola hit me up i'm 26 on the concert boom construction business so i'm good with my hands
02:46:18.140
there you have it and then i think we're caught up on chats there uh i think we have to wrap in
02:46:26.060
about 15 minutes uh final thoughts anybody i do want to touch on good touch on um the i sent it in the
02:46:38.620
one of the the second one i forgot what it was the women supporting women's toxic behavior sure
02:46:46.300
i'm just curious to hear from standpoint like if i gave you a scenario for example your home
02:46:50.060
girl comes to you her man cheated on her she slashes his tires what are you saying i would tell
02:46:56.940
her boyfriend or her ex i mean i mean that isn't a behavior that no one should condone even if
02:47:03.340
oh can i just i should mention this before the show if you can just like lean back because you're
02:47:10.540
kind of blocking if you yeah i know it's hard it's okay go ahead um perfect it's i mean it's a bad
02:47:22.380
behavior i don't think i don't think just because you're best friends it it means that you shouldn't
02:47:28.460
be able to point out her wrong i mean we should be holding each other accountable that's the only way
02:47:33.340
to uplift women and even men too i think it's important that men also point out the bad behavior
02:47:41.100
even if that means you know ruining a four-year relationship down the drain it has to be what it
02:47:46.300
has to be and so i'd say tell them i agree i don't condone that behavior i just hear a lot of
02:47:52.780
girls are like yeah girl like yes like yeah it's so common yeah it's extremely common for women to
02:48:01.340
support women's toxic behavior extremely i think because with women like thinking you're being a
02:48:07.260
good friend is supporting someone which is which is a good like a good friend trait but it's also if
02:48:12.780
you're a good friend you're gonna support someone but at the same time confront them right if you're
02:48:17.660
if they're doing anything like yeah yeah all right final thought anybody else
02:48:30.620
hello no no oh about the same question no just about like final thought on anything
02:48:37.100
once again this is a perfect example of how men need to carry in relationships men need to carry
02:48:50.460
conversationally men need to do everything i have six women here at the table everything who are
02:48:55.420
incapable no offense guys of carrying a conversation no i know do you want our
02:49:01.340
end this is not a relationship situation this is a podcast hold on brian you have to clarify
02:49:08.140
i literally got up at the beginning of the podcast and i was like guys i need to
02:49:11.500
fucking figure out what's the technical issue come on y'all y'all give us a talk
02:49:17.020
do you want our ending thoughts or like a new topic i think we're ending in like 10 minutes yeah
02:49:21.980
so it could be a new topic if it's something quick or
02:49:24.460
um i think i guess just adding to what i was talking about earlier um you know when it comes
02:49:35.580
to leadership in men i think you know with hokapulture and everything like that i think it's
02:49:39.980
very very important that especially men should practice self-control i think that's a huge factor
02:49:46.700
when it comes to being a good leader because if you can't control your own body don't expect me to
02:49:51.420
let you control anything else in a relationship and so i think it's i mean you can have everything
02:49:57.500
but if you lack self-control you you've lost everything period yep i completely agree i think
02:50:05.340
that a lot of men these days um they they want to be leaders but they don't want to accept the
02:50:14.860
responsibility that is required of becoming a leader and you can say the exact same thing for women i
02:50:21.260
understand in that you know like she wants to be a leader she wants to be super dominant and you know
02:50:26.700
so it goes both ways but at the end of the day um i think that even the most strong woman as long as
02:50:33.100
she has you know some morals in her heart and you know she is truly seeking something real she will
02:50:40.460
submit to a good man and especially um you know coming from the christian perspective um it is extremely
02:50:48.540
important that christian men first submit to god because at the end of the day how can you expect
02:50:56.300
any christian woman to want to submit to you if you are not first submitted to god it's extremely
02:51:01.820
important and um and if you uh if you become that leader then you will find the right woman i think
02:51:09.900
one of the greatest benefits of right now i mean like we think about the hookup culture and everything
02:51:14.300
and you know how like there's no real women out there that are worthy of me right like that's
02:51:21.180
the constant argument but at the end of the day doesn't it make it so much easier to find the right
02:51:25.660
one because now you have a lot less to go through like you can say nope not her not her not her not her
02:51:31.500
but at the end of the day if you know what you want then wow i mean what a blessing it's just made
02:51:38.540
it so much easier so but at the end of the day what are you doing sorry i'm bored that's rude to
02:51:44.620
her sorry i'm so sorry i apologize okay i do i'm sorry say it with your chest i apologize to you
02:51:57.980
i didn't know if you had anything else to say but i wanted to just follow up to that
02:52:01.740
yeah i do agree i think that the stronger your discernment gets the smaller that your dating pool
02:52:05.660
gets and people think that that's a negative thing they get into scarcity mindset and feel
02:52:09.420
like oh my god like my dating pool is getting smaller when you're actually just getting you're
02:52:13.420
like honing in more clearly to what you want so you can more quickly cut out what you do and don't want
02:52:18.940
um so another thing i want to touch on with this community um specifically red pill community and i know
02:52:27.100
that when these shows just say men and all men that's not really the case these are more
02:52:32.140
more this is a little bit more of a tame one compared to others but there's still a lot of
02:52:37.980
red pill rhetoric and it's very it's silly to me that there are a lot of um there are a lot of men in
02:52:49.340
these communities who shame and judge women for choosing the wrong men but then on the flip side they
02:52:56.540
shame and judge women for like like not choosing better when their standards are too high and
02:53:03.660
standards the men's standards or the women's the women's the women's standards so they judge and
02:53:10.620
blame and shame women for choosing wrong and essentially what they're saying is not having
02:53:15.420
good enough standards then they're judging and blaming and shaming women for having too high standards
02:53:21.260
and so it's just this it's again just this like pointing the finger when we could all really just
02:53:26.140
like go within and like align to i think i think most men don't really give a fuck if you date a scumbag
02:53:33.980
like that's on you you hear it a lot in this community they'll like say oh you didn't choose
02:53:39.820
you chose wrong or whatever it's just something that i hear a lot i haven't i mean i've watched a
02:53:46.540
decent yeah if you date a dude who's a scumbag a lot of times we choose wrong as women great
02:53:52.460
absolutely and i'm not saying that we don't we do it's vital to take full accountability and like
02:53:58.140
when i'm coaching people and i am the hardest on myself and when i'm coaching people i go
02:54:02.940
in on these women um like in a loving space um you have to hold people accountability you know
02:54:09.340
accountable just like you would call you would lovingly call out a real friend but um it's
02:54:18.540
harmful because a lot of these men are looking up to certain men who spew a lot of this rhetoric and
02:54:26.300
i'm not like referring to you specifically but these men will shame women and say that they're like
02:54:34.940
getting played and that they're falling for the games and it's their fault and you know
02:54:40.780
understandably the lesson's the lesson but these same men are falling for the men that they look up
02:54:47.260
to like running the same game on them like a lot of these men in these communities don't have integrity
02:54:54.780
they're they may be financially successful but erroneous erroneous yeah but they're
02:55:01.980
grandstand keep going it's not a moral grandstand i really don't like everybody judges to an extent
02:55:09.980
but i don't get your point men are shaming women because women are picking shitty men but are you
02:55:17.900
and then also judging and shaming women for saying to choose better so it's they're judging and shaming
02:55:23.180
no matter what you do it's a lose-lose situation is what i'm saying and i'm not even saying men i'm
02:55:27.980
saying the men in this community i don't know specifically it's not all men i don't know
02:55:33.660
specifically what you're talking about but if a woman dates a guy who is a scumbag that's on her
02:55:41.900
and people are fair to say you probably shouldn't have done that yeah no of course a guy dates a
02:55:48.220
but that's not shaming or that's just saying the truth but um it's one thing to make mistakes
02:55:57.500
it's another to keep dating the wrong guys and they're not holding yourself accountable
02:56:02.700
so i'm just gonna say it like specifically andrew tate he is literally it just got leaked that he's
02:56:09.980
literally doing exactly allegedly what he's been accused of and and these men are looking up to him
02:56:21.740
and judging and blaming and shaming women for falling for the same type of guys that these men
02:56:27.260
are falling for these men are getting played by these men that they look up to and then judging
02:56:32.460
and blaming women for getting played by the same kind of men and that's just the silly thing that well
02:56:37.500
i'm not sure specifically what you're referencing but i would point out that i believe it was
02:56:40.860
yesterday or the day before andrew was actually released from house arrest so there who knows
02:56:46.620
how the court case is going to proceed and maybe they find him guilty maybe they don't in any case
02:56:51.820
it's pending uh it's a pending criminal case right innocent until proven guilty we don't know what
02:56:56.860
the situation is um and regardless if they find enough evidence to what what's fine what's your thing
02:57:02.380
about andrew tate i don't get it what regardless if they find enough evidence against him
02:57:07.180
he's still his voice is literally being emotionally mentally and physically abusive in these in these
02:57:15.100
leaked messages so regardless if they find enough evidence look i don't i'm not really
02:57:19.900
i don't disagree okay i don't disagree hold on i don't disagree with you andrew tate has has said
02:57:24.780
from his own mouth some very damning things for example when he was on the uh full send the nelk
02:57:29.580
podcast or whatever he said that he would take men for everything that they had and no i i don't excuse me
02:57:36.060
excuse me let me clarify i don't think he verbatim said that but he said that he was like behind
02:57:40.860
the keyboard and he was managing only fans girls and he my my view is is he did it sounded a little
02:57:47.660
like fraud but dollars just tat girl knee ee it's a real job get me in the next part i have a new
02:57:55.100
tube hi sam hi sam hi sam miss you uh thank you sam i look i think tate has said some damning things but
02:58:01.580
i can't be a market strategy we can we can i overall he has some very good he has some good
02:58:08.220
messages for men and points i want to say this and he's i do agree he does i have to say he's made
02:58:13.500
out to be so which one is it it can you can be both i guess but it can be both he's he's misconstrued
02:58:21.740
by the media a lot of the time like if you watch his whole podcast he has some good stuff to say
02:58:27.100
and a lot of people are just mad because it's the truth and it targets a group of people that are not
02:58:33.980
usually targeted yeah and i understand that and i'm not like triggered by anything he does says or
02:58:38.220
anything my issue is more that it's like a harmful thing to spread he does say a lot of very truthful
02:58:43.900
things about men having integrity and being transparent and yet the opposite is actually what
02:58:49.500
he's doing and this happened this has happened a lot with people um mirroring to the world to this
02:58:57.740
to be this iconic man with integrity and yet very real things get leaked about them that shows
02:59:05.740
otherwise it's not just him i don't have anything personal against him i just think it's very okay
02:59:11.020
get off your grandstand we get it andrew tate has said some damning things like it's okay cool
02:59:15.740
are you gonna land the plane are you arriving at your point no i already made it okay that's not
02:59:20.700
that wasn't my point all right we have haha when chest girl chest tat girl needs to shut the yapper
02:59:26.060
yep there you have it and then we have gianni hey camilla huge fan loved you in the mr beast video
02:59:31.500
uh hold on it's getting pulled up was wondering if you could wish me a happy 12th birthday thank you
02:59:37.260
i just pooped in my pants there you have it happy 12th birthday i love you i don't know if it's gonna get
02:59:42.620
12 years old yeah there it is happy 12th birthday buddy there you have it thank you for wishing him
02:59:47.100
a happy birthday then we have mr cappadocia hey thank you for the 50. women have a psychological
02:59:52.620
trait called own group preference meaning men as group prioritize the well-being of women and so do
02:59:57.980
women there have been experiments in this but the real world makes it abundantly clear women have a
03:00:04.220
i think it's in group and out group preference so actually women have an in-group preference and
03:00:10.460
actually men have a out group preference for women so women have a very strong in-group preference
03:00:16.140
for each other and men have a slight out group preference for women yes so thank you mr cappadocia
03:00:21.980
appreciate it we have ninja smokehouse camila it's unfortunate you've chosen to ruin your life so
03:00:26.620
oh wow okay glad you like your nighttime routine red pill this red pill that girl and mill needs to
03:00:31.980
take accountability for her bad decisions and stop giving advice corner girl is 411 brian i did make that
03:00:39.580
very clear thank you oh he's he's mentioning that because i i only date women whose height start was
03:00:45.500
starts with four but uh yeah all right jason pestana 69 69 thank you man girl in brown talking like we
03:00:52.860
got all day move along pal kate is it pink oh my god boom roasted it okay i think you asked your friends
03:01:01.580
to send all that half okay okay okay no it is what it is okay yeah i mean you're making money yeah
03:01:08.380
what's up can i add something last thing and then i feel like you get pushed back when your own masculine
03:01:13.100
energy expresses truth and then they what they really want is their feminine energy really just wants to
03:01:18.860
be like gossipy that's really what it is it's like it's just they want entertainment they don't want
03:01:25.180
education what do you mean i'm not sure what you're talking about okay so when a woman steps into her
03:01:32.780
masculine energy energy and expresses a like a very clear truth that is against whatever said ideology
03:01:43.900
they who are supposed to be such high value men which i don't resonate with any of these terms by the
03:01:48.380
way but they all they do is they like say a bunch of wild things and they just get in there
03:01:55.100
feminine gossipy energy and yet they're masculine that's just i there's just so much it's just there's
03:02:01.660
so much hypocrisy hypocrisy in these communities all right well who knows but i mean you've mentioned
03:02:08.460
a couple of these buzzwords before you mentioned you keep mentioning the red pill look red pill equals
03:02:16.380
the truth equals reality see it's it's an analogy from the the film the matrix seeing the world as it
03:02:24.060
truly is embracing the truth even if said truth is painful or uncomfortable right women can take the
03:02:30.380
red pill too yes i do i love the matrix movies and i completely understand this concept but just because
03:02:38.220
you're spewing some ideology it does not make it the red pill truth because a bunch of wounded men who
03:02:45.340
are just projecting at women feel that it is because it's making their ego feel better yeah but i mean when
03:02:50.780
it comes to objective truth earlier on in the conversation we were doing the one to ten rating
03:02:55.260
system and you refuse to have a good faith conversation about that i didn't refuse to be
03:03:00.380
good faith just because i'm not answering a question doesn't mean i'm bad faith that's kind of
03:03:05.020
bad faith no it's not it's just something that it would go against a boundary of me like
03:03:10.700
i wouldn't answer this if i were like dating somebody so like if i was on a date i would not like
03:03:16.860
answer this so why would i go against my own boundary and answer it then it's not bad faith i
03:03:20.620
haven't yelled or screamed or done anything i'm just speaking truth i'm just being grounded they say
03:03:25.260
i'm triggered and upset i'm not triggered i'm not upset it takes there's nothing you could do say to
03:03:30.780
trigger or upset me like trust me it's just it's just funny you give a little pushback and it's like no
03:03:38.460
no no well we debate on the show but um i mean and and again this really ties in like one of the red
03:03:48.140
pills a woman could take is not confusing sexual attraction for relationship attraction or marriage
03:03:55.580
attraction and we already talked about this men and women they have we have different sexual strategies
03:04:01.580
so you as a woman you wouldn't want to project your experience onto how men operate so as i already
03:04:07.660
previously said for a woman to sleep with a man that man has to typically be at least physically
03:04:12.780
attractive enough to be in a relationship with whereas men will sleep with women of a certain
03:04:17.980
physical attractiveness oh hold on jimmy donaldson donated 99 chest tap been pleading the fifth this
03:04:25.660
whole damn time move it along pal go take care of your kids asian girl please remove the headwear brian
03:04:32.220
i love the flannel keep up the hustle wednesday of dropping thank you appreciate it look the red pill would
03:04:37.580
be just having an accurate self-assessment of your uh you know own physical attractiveness so that
03:04:42.780
you can maneuver in the sexual marketplace the relationship marketplace the marriage marketplace
03:04:50.300
accurately and not get hurt as a woman i think there is some truth to what red pill says but not
03:04:57.660
everything and i think this is another thing that gets tricky is because andrew tate for example i know he
03:05:03.580
doesn't identify with red pill i'm just using him as an extreme example because it's obvious okay
03:05:07.820
final points and then we have to wrap he um he uses um a lot of pimps do this like pimps will say
03:05:16.460
complete absolute truths they will like shock you with some truth and it will get you to trust them
03:05:20.940
because you're like well he was honest about that and he does this in certain instances and it this
03:05:26.860
is what men do this is what a lot of convincing men do to play women as well um women could do it too but
03:05:32.700
i'm going to use this example with men i'm not anti-men or anti-women um but so it's just
03:05:41.980
it's and this is actually what drew me to red pill i was like oh my gosh these guys actually are saying
03:05:46.620
some some truthful facts can you land the plane please but once you look into it deeper it there's
03:05:52.060
a lot of hypocrisy and there's ultimately a lack of integrity and it's feeding wounded
03:05:58.140
men instead of guiding them to actually fully emotionally heal it's it's superficial they're
03:06:06.140
chasing money and women and that is not integrated masculine energy okay quickly can you give me three
03:06:12.780
things that the supposed red pill gets wrong um one example is they well i'll just use i think it was
03:06:25.100
rollo tamasi he specifically said that something along the lines of women find men who can who are with a
03:06:35.660
bunch of women ideal like women go for men who have a lot of women and actually there's been a study on
03:06:42.620
it and i forget it's like a letter it's like hx or something the study that was done that is actually
03:06:47.500
contradictory to that because women cannot women do not find that evolutionary evolutionarily attractive
03:06:54.300
because typically those men don't have enough resources to actually sustain their family and they
03:06:59.020
would be abandoned so that's just one you said three um what is another you're hold on women
03:07:06.940
women absolutely there's a component of social proof when it comes to what women find attractive a lot
03:07:12.700
of women will need cosigns from either their other girlfriends they'll like check with their girlfriends
03:07:18.060
oh is this guy what do you think about this guy men don't need cosigns from their male friends
03:07:22.380
to pursue a chick so but this i if if a guy is capable of getting 10 10 women other women are
03:07:31.500
going to find him attractive by virtue of social proof yeah kind of like what we were talking about
03:07:35.420
earlier though it's not really about is he capable it's like does he have strength over his like lower
03:07:42.140
desires that's really what's ultimately attractive sure some wounded women don't care and they'll just
03:07:47.340
take a man that like cheats on them or like as an open relationship and there can be positive
03:07:53.020
open relationships i'm not saying no really open relationships camilla i just paid for your
03:07:57.660
only fans now i can't feel my left leg caitlin can you feed me grimace shake while i pee
03:08:04.460
brian take my innocence please thank you for subscribing love you uh luke thank you man appreciate it
03:08:12.780
i don't know about the innocence thing but i'm not sure about that one buddy um
03:08:19.660
i wish we had more time to uh probably get into this really i have many more but i know you have
03:08:24.220
to cut me off so yeah what and like i don't know this
03:08:31.500
there's there's like a red pill ideology and then there's just generally the red pill
03:08:36.220
so look i don't i don't claim to subscribe to a red pill ideology like i just use red pill as an
03:08:44.220
analogy for the truth for example lizzo's not a 10 to me that is the truth she's obese you cannot be a
03:08:52.780
10 and be obese do you object to that i don't deal with a numerical i'm not dealing with that numerical
03:09:00.540
stance we keep going to the physical attractiveness things well it's important
03:09:06.060
don't you think that physical don't you think that physical attractiveness is important when
03:09:11.660
you're trying to scout though i mean yes physical attract you're not going to talk to someone that
03:09:15.980
you're not attracted of course but it's it's on both sides it's not just one-sided and also like
03:09:21.180
you know they say like whatever certain things each culture finds very largely different things
03:09:27.580
attractive even women have people have different preferences some people would find there is no
03:09:32.940
culture in the world for either men or women that finds obesity attractive across the board
03:09:42.540
you okay yeah i understand this but you're using a rather extreme example it's not extreme
03:09:47.660
what percentage of people are obese was it 50 or something yeah it's not an extreme example
03:09:54.220
it's not an extreme example but it's never just because one little thing hasn't ever been like a
03:09:59.340
characterization of physical attractiveness doesn't i don't know it's do you think
03:10:04.940
okay do you think liz does attend whoops i don't i'm not doing the scale thing it's pointless
03:10:11.980
no okay all right well we're gonna i'm not getting anywhere so we're gonna wrap there if you want you
03:10:17.900
can come back i know we had a little heated discussion but we could pick it up another time um guys last call
03:10:23.340
hit the like button please on your way out thank you for tuning in tonight you could've been anywhere
03:10:27.260
in the world but you're here with me i appreciate that thank you to everyone who super chats donates
03:10:31.980
and supports the show thank you to the panel thank you to all our chat mods thank you to brit who's
03:10:37.340
helping with time stamps uh any women who want to be on the show dm at whatever on instagram we we will be
03:10:44.380
live again okay tristan tate donated 99 that's lizzo is 100 to 10th she's so bad fr i would let her
03:10:53.260
lick big mac sauce off my left cheek sorry brian gonna have to disagree well there you have it tristan
03:10:59.900
tate uh i guess uh you know everybody has their taste so uh there you go um we will be live again
03:11:05.820
tuesday at 7 p.m pacific we will are we forgetting oh really quick twitch twitch guys go to twitch.tv
03:11:13.820
slash whatever on your way out drop us a follow drop us a prime sub if you have one twitch.tv
03:11:19.900
slash whatever uh drops follow drop us a prime sub yo captain think for the prime uh think for the
03:11:26.540
yep there you go there you have it drop us a follow twitch.tv slash whatever yo uh dante think for
03:11:31.980
the prime appreciate it thank you for the resub um twitch.tv slash whatever drop us a follow drop us
03:11:36.620
a prime sub on your way out thank you guys um and uh let's see uh yeah that's it we'll see you guys next
03:11:43.260
time oh seven's in the chat good night guys and uh we will see you tuesday