Bankas Podcast - December 19, 2024


Born in Toronto, Ontario, USA ｜ Bankas Podcast on Patreon - #053

Topics
support on Patreon
Hosted by
Ben Bankas
Mentioned
Tony Ben Bankus Shih Tzu Mark Breslin Shmiablos Diablos Rogan Benny Hank
Governor of Canada ｜ Bankas Podcast - #076 New Year New Me ｜ Bankas Podcast - #077

Episode Stats


Length

11 minutes

Words per minute

175.52

Word count

1,997

Sentence count

213

Harmful content

Misogyny

8

sentences flagged

Toxicity

47

sentences flagged

Hate speech

6

sentences flagged


Summary

Summaries generated with gmurro/bart-large-finetuned-filtered-spotify-podcast-summ .

A little bit about myself, my life, and what's going on with me. Also, I got a new pair of glasses, so that's cool. And I'm going to Austin, Texas to perform on the Red Band's show tonight.

Transcript

Transcript generated with Whisper (turbo).
Misogyny classifications generated with MilaNLProc/bert-base-uncased-ear-misogyny .
Toxicity classifications generated with s-nlp/roberta_toxicity_classifier .
Hate speech classifications generated with facebook/roberta-hate-speech-dynabench-r4-target .
Topics generated with Qwen2.5-3B-Instruct.
Hosts, guests, and mentioned names generated with spaCy (en_core_web_sm), reconciled against Wikidata.
00:00:00.880 Welcome to Bankist Podcast on Patreon.
00:00:04.980 You've made it, folks.
00:00:06.340 You've made it to the special place, Patreon bonus episode.
00:00:12.300 Here we go.
00:00:14.600 Wanted to let you know a little bit about what's going on with me
00:00:17.320 because this is, you know, this is Patreon, baby.
00:00:20.000 We get to know each other here.
00:00:21.280 We hang out for a little bit.
00:00:24.720 Number one, my glasses. 0.95
00:00:26.440 I know people are like, why do you have such gay glasses? 0.53
00:00:28.600 These glasses, I bought them as a joke, okay?
00:00:33.780 I bought them because I went to a glasses store and I pointed them out.
00:00:38.580 I tried them on and the Asian woman who was looking after me 1.00
00:00:42.240 said they didn't look good and I was a little offended.
00:00:46.400 And then a larger black lady came from the back of the glasses store 1.00
00:00:51.180 to say, she, those are my favorite glasses. 0.80
00:00:54.000 So I bought them to spite the Asian woman. 1.00
00:00:57.280 And because she knows that these are Asian old lady glasses, 0.95
00:01:01.140 but they look, they look interesting on me.
00:01:03.200 But the point is that they're broken and they should be broken
00:01:06.440 because I'm done with them.
00:01:08.840 But I am wearing them right now because I have no other contacts.
00:01:12.860 I'm out of contacts.
00:01:14.340 This is a thing.
00:01:15.240 I have to wear contacts. 1.00
00:01:16.500 You're always ordering a fucking box of contacts. 1.00
00:01:18.540 The contacts, contacts. 1.00
00:01:19.560 It's a nightmare.
00:01:22.320 And now I'm going to have to perform in these glasses tonight,
00:01:25.520 which is another nightmare.
00:01:28.020 Two shows.
00:01:29.420 It's a good day for me.
00:01:30.640 This is a really good day.
00:01:31.640 I have to admit, so far, so good.
00:01:34.460 Woke up this morning at, set an alarm at eight.
00:01:39.000 Snoozed it.
00:01:39.740 Got up at nine.
00:01:41.780 Slept through that.
00:01:42.660 My family got up and I just lay in bed until 1030, 0.97
00:01:47.000 just like an absolute piece of garbage while my family went downstairs 0.96
00:01:52.280 to do fun things. 0.98
00:01:53.880 My kid and my fiance, my, my, my dogs have two dogs.
00:01:57.140 I have a Shih Tzu.
00:01:58.080 It's mine.
00:01:59.140 And then I have a Schnoodle, which is my girl's dog, 0.98
00:02:01.720 which is the shitty dog, but it's still a good dog. 0.99
00:02:03.960 It's a good Texas dog and barks. 0.99
00:02:06.280 That's a good thing in Texas.
00:02:07.860 Everybody has a dog that barks.
00:02:09.380 You got to have a Texas barking dog.
00:02:13.420 If you don't have a gun, you better have a dog that barks. 0.99
00:02:16.700 Got to have something to keep the blacks out. 1.00
00:02:22.540 I just said that because it's, you know, it's Patreon. 0.95
00:02:25.940 It's saying what's, what's coming to my head, but it was nice.
00:02:28.440 I woke up now there on a play date, which I absolutely love that.
00:02:33.240 You know, introduced my fiance to some random woman in the park.
00:02:38.860 Hey, oh, you're a woman. 1.00
00:02:41.280 You're a woman.
00:02:41.980 Why don't you two hang out so I can be alone?
00:02:45.820 And of course they're, they're having a little play date.
00:02:48.980 So that's, that's pretty nice.
00:02:50.800 That's nice.
00:02:51.400 We can do the pod.
00:02:53.040 We get, we can smoke.
00:02:55.120 We get, we can have a cigarette.
00:02:57.520 We can, we can relax.
00:02:59.300 It's quiet.
00:03:02.320 Beautiful.
00:03:02.760 And then tonight in Austin, Texas, I'm jumping on two shows, the secret show, of course, red bands show, the famous secret show that you get to potentially perform on.
00:03:16.320 If you do decently at kill Tony.
00:03:17.880 And I've been doing secret show for a long time. 0.59
00:03:21.220 I remember the first time I ever did secret show was the week before I did kill Tony for the first time.
00:03:27.940 Way back in 2021 as a visitor, you know, just a, just a traveling visitor.
00:03:35.280 And, uh, was asked to do it, had a friend who was a friends with, with red band and Tony, his name was Hank used to be Tony's bodyguard, but then he decided to start doing standup comedy.
00:03:48.560 Biggest mistake he's ever made.
00:03:50.660 Even even was getting close with Rogan and stuff.
00:03:53.840 And I think he helped build the mothership.
00:03:56.600 I think he was like a construction manager on that.
00:03:59.060 And then he was like, you know what?
00:04:00.960 I'm going to throw it all away to do open mics in San Antonio.
00:04:03.900 So, but anyway, I knew him at the time and he was like vouching for me and they believed him then because he wasn't a comic.
00:04:12.520 And so I did, um, secret show back in 2021 and then jumped on kill Tony.
00:04:19.980 That was where I got my first, my second 10,000 followers after my first account was deleted at 10,000 followers.
00:04:26.940 That's why I have Ben Bank is too, which kind of sad that I had to do Ben Bank is too.
00:04:34.360 I'd like it if it was just Ben Bank is now.
00:04:35.940 Some other loser has the Ben Bank is Instagram and it's just a faceless, nameless person.
00:04:42.280 And I, I, I'm just, I message them.
00:04:44.420 I go, can I have this account?
00:04:46.700 Like what's going on here?
00:04:48.480 Maybe there's another Ben Bank is trying to make it out there, folks.
00:04:51.280 I don't want to, I don't want to ruin his chances.
00:04:54.100 I got to keep checking my shirt on my last pod. 0.96
00:04:57.320 There was fucking dust on my shirt for my beard or something. 0.93
00:05:01.360 Like, I think I have like a bit of, it's, it gets dry. 0.99
00:05:05.520 And then if I shave it, I just look fat.
00:05:07.300 So it's, but two shows tonight, Austin, Texas, love it here, by the way, love it here.
00:05:14.540 And to my Canadian fans who are looking at me going, how the hell did you move to Austin, Texas?
00:05:22.220 Well, first of all, you have to do comedy for 15 years.
00:05:25.380 Okay.
00:05:25.820 Or 13 years when I got my visa.
00:05:28.500 And then you got to prove that you actually did comedy.
00:05:32.880 You got to get all kinds of letters signed by people at yuck, yucks, Mark Breslin, agents, managers, people.
00:05:42.640 And you go through a protest, protest, you go through a protest.
00:05:47.320 You got to go through the Palestine protest to get into the America. 0.61
00:05:50.840 You go through a process.
00:05:52.200 You got to pay, you know, 15, $20,000 legal fees.
00:05:57.420 And then you can perform comedy.
00:05:59.400 But I can only perform comedy here.
00:06:01.000 I can't, I can't just do Uber Eats.
00:06:03.360 You understand?
00:06:04.260 Which is kind of good.
00:06:05.080 It's, I like it.
00:06:06.240 I don't like a plan B.
00:06:08.420 You know, I see a lot of comics.
00:06:10.100 They go, oh, I'm not, I don't want to do the visa.
00:06:12.520 I'm going to wait for the green card.
00:06:14.080 Reason being, they don't have enough comedy work to survive in America off only comedy. 0.99
00:06:19.760 So they want to come here with a green card so they can work at a fucking Starbucks. 0.99
00:06:24.660 No, thanks. 1.00
00:06:25.600 Not for me.
00:06:26.880 Not for Benny boy. 0.99
00:06:29.120 Because we have shows on the fucking go, baby. 0.98
00:06:33.040 My first, you know, my first moments in the States were on tour with my visa. 0.98
00:06:39.180 My first, you know, I came here April and by May we were touring.
00:06:44.120 Okay, I had a month of hanging out in Austin, going to Mothership, doing shows, Sunset, Creek in the Cave.
00:06:53.400 At the time, I still did East Austin.
00:06:59.500 Roscoe's, doing all kinds of shows.
00:07:02.280 And then the tours start.
00:07:05.160 And then my tour is going to be crazy in 2025.
00:07:07.960 Like, I've had a nice break.
00:07:09.860 If you're wondering why, oh, he's doing a lot of pods.
00:07:12.100 He's doing a lot of posting.
00:07:14.120 He's doing a lot.
00:07:14.960 Yeah, well, I want to keep that up while I'm on tour as well.
00:07:17.500 But I am off of tour.
00:07:20.020 I am chilling.
00:07:20.960 I am chilling, trying to work.
00:07:22.880 But I do not just chill, folks.
00:07:25.680 I do not just chill.
00:07:27.540 I know a lot of people, other comics, you know, they play video games.
00:07:33.560 They have a passion.
00:07:34.500 I play video games.
00:07:35.700 And I like to play, you know, World of Warcraft or whatever.
00:07:40.340 And I play Diablos and Shmiablos.
00:07:43.240 And I know Elon plays it.
00:07:44.640 But, you know, he's worth $442 billion.
00:07:46.920 I think he could take a break.
00:07:49.680 I can't take breaks.
00:07:50.880 I don't like taking breaks.
00:07:51.940 I don't like thinking that I'm not doing something for myself, for my company.
00:07:58.260 I was going to sound like I was going to say country.
00:08:00.600 If I'm not, it's not what you do.
00:08:03.240 It's not what your country does for you.
00:08:05.060 But what you do for your country in that country is Canada.
00:08:08.100 And what I did is I left.
00:08:12.820 I tweeted on X.
00:08:15.620 I posted that.
00:08:18.400 In six months, I'm going to be saying I'm from Toronto, Ontario, USA.
00:08:22.920 Had a lot of not backlash, but just people.
00:08:25.920 Well, some backlash.
00:08:27.400 First of all, people were like, well, just move then.
00:08:30.360 Like a lot of people on X is like, bro, I already live here.
00:08:32.560 I'm in Austin, Texas, number one.
00:08:34.240 And then and a boo boo. 1.00
00:08:35.820 You know, you can't come.
00:08:37.340 Number two.
00:08:39.180 They go, oh, it wouldn't be Toronto, Ontario, USA.
00:08:43.000 It would be Toronto, USA or Toronto, Canada, USA.
00:08:47.000 It's like, bro, you know, people like a bunch of people writing that in the comments, both on Instagram.
00:08:53.400 And it's like, you don't have a social media following.
00:08:58.060 Nobody knows who you are.
00:08:59.780 You aren't right.
00:09:00.980 Like people will post like I had a guy critique me and I just told him to shut up straight up because I posted, you know, here's all my comedy specials.
00:09:12.180 And on X, you don't put the link in the original post.
00:09:15.260 Apparently, that fucks up the algorithm.
00:09:17.580 So you do it in the next post, the post below it link.
00:09:20.760 And the guy, some guys is like, well, why isn't the link in the post?
00:09:24.740 I think it would be much more efficient and much more.
00:09:26.980 It would be much better. 1.00
00:09:27.800 And I just go, shut up. 1.00
00:09:28.960 And then the guy goes, fuck you. 1.00
00:09:30.520 You just lost a fan. 1.00
00:09:31.640 You fat fuck. 1.00
00:09:32.460 It's like, bro, how fucking psych. 1.00
00:09:34.660 I knew when you posted what you posted that I had to tell you to shut up because you were being one of these people that when you're a public figure or you're rising in the ranks of whatever, or you're becoming somebody, people just want to be like, actually, you should do it like this. 0.98
00:09:50.420 Thanks. 1.00
00:09:50.780 And then when you're like, actually, you're a fucking loser and nobody knows who the fuck you are. 1.00
00:09:54.980 You suck, which I didn't say. 1.00
00:09:57.120 I said, shut up. 1.00
00:09:58.160 But that's what I meant. 0.98
00:09:59.640 They just they just snap because they're like, I never actually liked your comedy. 1.00
00:10:02.980 You're a piece of shit. 1.00
00:10:03.620 You're a fat fuck. 1.00
00:10:04.100 It's like, yeah, I know. 1.00
00:10:05.500 That's why I told you. 1.00
00:10:06.300 Shut up, bro. 0.98
00:10:09.860 Thank you for listening to the first 10 minutes of this Patreon bonus podcast episode. 0.98
00:10:15.080 The full episode is available on my Patreon, patreon.com slash Ben Bank is the best way to support me.
00:10:25.760 It's four dollars American a month.
00:10:28.060 Not sure what that is.
00:10:29.360 Canadian a month, probably around 10 bucks now, which is crazy or eight bucks.
00:10:34.760 It's worth it. 0.99
00:10:36.340 You spend more than that a day on your lunch, your shitty lunch. 0.98
00:10:40.980 And this isn't you're not spending that a day. 0.98
00:10:43.020 You're spending it once a month.
00:10:45.300 If you pay for the whole thing for the whole year, it's there's a discount.
00:10:50.600 So sign up, support me.
00:10:54.060 It's dope. 0.55
00:10:55.000 If you message me on there, I will respond.
00:10:57.480 If you have ideas for shows or for things, please join Patreon.
00:11:02.180 Message me.
00:11:02.720 We'll talk about it.
00:11:04.080 If you're going through something and you need somebody to talk to, that's not what this is about.
00:11:08.600 But still, I'll talk to you for maybe a little bit.
00:11:12.120 Definitely more than if you were just on Instagram.
00:11:15.100 So support me there.
00:11:16.900 Listen to the rest of this episode.
00:11:18.280 It is funny.
00:11:19.040 It is great.
00:11:19.800 I appreciate you guys.
00:11:21.060 Thank you.
00:11:21.720 And we'll see you on Patreon.