Get Off My Lawn - Gavin McInnes - GOML LIVE #103: THE END?

00:00:07.000 Barely see the breath surrounding live from New York.

00:00:16.000 It's Get Off My Lawn with Kevin McGuinness.

00:00:21.000 Only ever cold drink underneath Sipping from you Least Times Lost by Unreturn.

00:00:46.000 Guess who that was?

00:00:48.000 That was the Elvis Presley of hardcore Ian Mackay.

00:00:50.000 I never heard that song before the other night.

00:00:52.000 Is there a Fugazi album I don't know about?

00:00:55.000 What just happened?

00:00:58.000 What's going on?

00:01:01.000 Oh, for fuck's sake, this is not good.

00:01:04.000 Look how fucking ripped I am, dude.

00:01:07.000 Damn.

00:01:07.000 With this new lighting?

00:01:08.000 The darkness makes you ripped.

00:01:10.000 I'm like, do you ever see that show Manimal?

00:01:13.000 No.

00:01:14.000 It's about a guy who could turn into animals.

00:01:16.000 A man who could turn into animals. 0.97

00:01:19.000 And back when I was a kid, there was only one show on, like a night.

00:01:23.000 So your whole family would sit together and watch Manimal.

00:01:27.000 And he would slowly transform into like a cougar.

00:01:30.000 And they'd show his skin and it looked like that.

00:01:34.000 Now, here's what I don't get about old clips.

00:01:37.000 Did it look that shitty when we were watching them?

00:01:43.000 Some fucking nerd is talking about a show. 1.00

00:01:46.000 I hate these nerds that are into this bullshit.

00:01:48.000 Show the show.

00:01:52.000 It's fucking nerd.

00:01:52.000 But you look at old ladies' clips and the quality looks like shit.

00:01:55.000 Is that just because it's died of old age?

00:01:57.000 Or was I watching shit quality video?

00:01:59.000 Because I know when I look at old pictures, I'm disgusted by how bad they are.

00:02:05.000 Oh, that's sharp.

00:02:13.000 This is people in my neighborhood staring at me when I'm at the park.

00:02:21.000 He's turning into a pigeon.

00:02:26.000 Cougar.

00:02:27.000 Hawk.

00:02:30.000 Bird.

00:02:30.000 Monster.

00:02:31.000 Cat.

00:02:34.000 Hawk, eagle.

00:02:36.000 Eagle?

00:02:37.000 Oh, I know how you could do that feather scene.

00:02:39.000 You get some fake skin, you put the feathers through, and then you pull them through the other side and reverse it.

00:02:44.000 And then reverse it, yeah.

00:02:45.000 Yeah.

00:02:47.000 Ooh.

00:02:48.000 Manima.

00:02:49.000 Isn't that the intro to the show?

00:02:51.000 I think these are just the transformation when they turn into one particular bird.

00:02:55.000 Hawk, panther, and snake.

00:02:56.000 And then you get hit by a carp, and you're dead.

00:03:00.000 That's my caveat.

00:03:01.000 I'm happy to time travel, become go back to the land of dinosaurs, become a bird.

00:03:05.000 I need it in writing that I can't be killed.

00:03:08.000 I'm not going to turn into no fucking mouse and have no motherfucking cat scoop me up, start chewing my black ass. 0.97

00:03:15.000 Nah.

00:03:16.000 Hell no.

00:03:16.000 I don't want no motherfucking helicopter sucking me up when I'm a hawk.

00:03:21.000 Cutting my bird head off and shit. 1.00

00:03:24.000 Fuck no.

00:03:24.000 I'd rather not risk it.

00:03:26.000 Thanks.

00:03:28.000 Plus, what if you suck at flying?

00:03:31.000 You could be an amoeba.

00:03:32.000 You could be an amoeba.

00:03:36.000 This is my black sidekick, Ryan.

00:03:38.000 You could always be the best.

00:03:41.000 Yo, you could be the bird, which is the bald eagle.

00:03:45.000 The bird which is...

00:03:47.000 Remember that guy?

00:03:49.000 Oh, I remember that.

00:03:50.000 What was that again?

00:03:50.000 Earth Girls Are Easy.

00:03:52.000 Oh, yeah, that's not that long ago.

00:03:53.000 That was like 2000.

00:03:54.000 No, he was a kid in 2000.

00:03:57.000 1980s, man.

00:03:59.000 Reddick, the guy who does ridiculousness, he purchased himself a black friend. 0.99

00:04:07.000 Fat Mike or something.

00:04:08.000 Big Mike.

00:04:09.000 And it was like his friend.

00:04:11.000 And then his friend pulled a Patrice.

00:04:13.000 This is something people don't know about Patrice.

00:04:15.000 Can we not get more lighting in here?

00:04:16.000 This is pretty bad.

00:04:21.000 Oh.

00:04:27.000 Perfect, Ryan.

00:04:28.000 Thanks.

00:04:29.000 Ryan saves the day once again.

00:04:31.000 Now you could tell a spooky story.

00:04:34.000 I would put this on the mic.

00:04:35.000 It might fuck up the audio, though.

00:04:37.000 Does it sound weird?

00:04:38.000 Yes.

00:04:39.000 Oh, it does.

00:04:39.000 What if I put it here?

00:04:41.000 That's a boy.

00:04:42.000 That's my boy.

00:04:44.000 That's my boss grown man boy.

00:04:47.000 That's my boss, boy.

00:04:49.000 Who's a little boss? 1.00

00:04:50.000 That's my boss.

00:04:53.000 That's my boss.

00:04:54.000 That should be a show.

00:04:55.000 Didn't think.

00:04:56.000 Didn't it?

00:04:56.000 It's a new 80s sitcom called That's My Boss.

00:05:01.000 My pet retard. 0.95

00:05:03.000 He's Japanese Puerto Rican.

00:05:06.000 Wait, I'm your big.

00:05:07.000 Does that make a difference?

00:05:08.000 I hope I don't get it.

00:05:09.000 Come back to me.

00:05:12.000 It's 1% better.

00:05:14.000 Okay.

00:05:16.000 Yeah, he bought himself a black friend.

00:05:18.000 Every young boy's dream.

00:05:22.000 This is like the toy.

00:05:23.000 Remember that movie, The Toy with Fucking?

00:05:25.000 Or I used to work for this rap record label called Decon.

00:05:29.000 And the guy, his mom had copyrighted Pilates.

00:05:33.000 So they were fucking loaded.

00:05:36.000 And what does the little white boy do when he gets tons of money?

00:05:39.000 His mommy buys him a rap label, which means black friends.

00:05:42.000 So if I sign you, you got to hang out with me.

00:05:45.000 So he'd hang out with these black guys that were like, well, whatever.

00:05:48.000 I guess we got to hang out with you to have records.

00:05:51.000 I'll do it.

00:05:53.000 But Big Mike said, look, whatever it's called, Robin Mike was the name of the show.

00:05:58.000 Robin Big.

00:05:59.000 Robin Big.

00:06:01.000 I need money.

00:06:02.000 I'm a major part of this show.

00:06:03.000 And he's like, no, you're not, actually.

00:06:05.000 I kind of bought you.

00:06:06.000 You're my sidekick.

00:06:08.000 And he goes, well, then I'm going to go on strike.

00:06:10.000 And he said, bye.

00:06:11.000 And then the guy died because he was a fatso. 1.00

00:06:13.000 Yes.

00:06:14.000 He was like, dude, if I gave you more money, you would have eaten yourself to death.

00:06:18.000 I.e., you did.

00:06:19.000 Yeah.

00:06:19.000 Chillo, you've got to.

00:06:21.000 No, the two are not related, actually.

00:06:22.000 One is just he's bad at, well, they are related.

00:06:25.000 He's bad at managing the food that goes into his head and he's bad at managing his life.

00:06:29.000 But Patrice was the same Way he'd start getting something going and he's like, I want triple the salary.

00:06:34.000 They go, What?

00:06:35.000 We just started this.

00:06:36.000 No, you're fired.

00:06:37.000 He fired his production company in a meeting with Comedy Central.

00:06:42.000 He could have been the next Dave Chappelle.

00:06:44.000 He had all these great sketch ideas, super raunchy.

00:06:46.000 This is back when political correctness hadn't totally taken over.

00:06:49.000 And he had a really raunchy idea of like race riots and all this fucking hilarious Dave Chappelle type race stuff.

00:06:57.000 And then he fired Michael Hirshoin in the pitch meeting.

00:07:00.000 So then, not the pitch meeting, the pitch, like acceptance meeting, let's get started on the pilot meeting.

00:07:06.000 And so then Comedy Central goes, well, it's over then.

00:07:08.000 We're not doing it.

00:07:09.000 We did it because we know this production company.

00:07:11.000 And Patrice was like, fuck all of you and walked out. 1.00

00:07:13.000 Yep.

00:07:14.000 You know that story?

00:07:15.000 Yeah.

00:07:16.000 How do you know that story?

00:07:17.000 Oh, my God.

00:07:18.000 Well, from Opie and Anthony, and then Chris Tucker wanted him as the dad and everybody hates Chris.

00:07:23.000 And he sabotaged it on purpose.

00:07:25.000 He didn't learn his lines and shit.

00:07:26.000 He just, maybe he was afraid of...

00:07:28.000 Chris Tucker.

00:07:29.000 Chris Rock.

00:07:30.000 Yeah.

00:07:31.000 Yeah.

00:07:31.000 And yeah, he would self-tap, sabotage a lot.

00:07:33.000 They had endless stories about that.

00:07:35.000 So your favorite things, just to be clear, are glasses, clocks, birds, and the sun.

00:07:42.000 Glasses, clocks, birds, and the sun.

00:07:44.000 Oh, my tattoo?

00:07:45.000 Yeah, that's what it looks like when people walk by you.

00:07:47.000 They go, man, that guy sure loves reading in the morning.

00:07:51.000 Well, it's a stop.

00:07:52.000 That was very Mitch Hedberg.

00:07:54.000 Man, that guy must like reading a lot.

00:07:57.000 But only when his life.

00:07:58.000 My friend has a tattoo of glasses, the sun, and a clock.

00:08:02.000 I think he likes to wake up early and read.

00:08:05.000 And he likes to fly.

00:08:08.000 He is unsuccessful unless he's the manimal. 0.86

00:08:11.000 He also has a dead friend who OD'd.

00:08:13.000 It might be that.

00:08:14.000 That's him.

00:08:15.000 Yes.

00:08:16.000 Yes.

00:08:17.000 Speaking of dead friends, Patrice O'Neill, the world's friend.

00:08:20.000 Even on Tough Crowd, he would derail whatever Colin was trying to do.

00:08:24.000 He'd make it a funnier show, but he would derail from whatever Colin had planned.

00:08:30.000 Yeah, that's different from derailing your career, though.

00:08:32.000 That's kind of punk rock to sort of wreck the thing and be kooky.

00:08:40.000 To wreck your career, here's my theory.

00:08:43.000 It's a form of insecurity.

00:08:45.000 It's kind of like why lottery winners blow all their money.

00:08:48.000 They don't feel worthy.

00:08:51.000 And I remember my dad said this.

00:08:52.000 I've told you this story before.

00:08:53.000 My dad said this when I was a young age.

00:08:54.000 He said, a lot of people don't get A's because they don't think they deserve an A. And I don't quite understand that, but I do get it in the sense that they sabotage their careers when they get offered this incredible opportunity and they go, eject, and just blow it because they can't handle that next level.

00:09:12.000 In fact, you get that with people and kids not wanting to get married, not wanting to have a kid.

00:09:18.000 It's like a combination of cowardice and insecurity where you go, I can't be a dad.

00:09:22.000 That's too crazy.

00:09:24.000 I can't.

00:09:24.000 It just sounds very gay.

00:09:26.000 It is.

00:09:29.000 Just a failure.

00:09:30.000 We had another fun suggestion from the readers.

00:09:33.000 So that wasn't from the readers.

00:09:34.000 That was...

00:09:35.000 Actually, look up that album, Fagazi Instrument.

00:09:40.000 I don't, I'm worried now one of my favorite bands has an album that slipped through the Gav cracks. 0.64

00:09:47.000 The Gav cracks.

00:09:49.000 The infamous Gav Cracks. 0.98

00:09:51.000 Yeah, this.

00:09:52.000 Oh, no.

00:09:53.000 I'm glad it's dark.

00:09:55.000 Fugazi slipped through this.

00:09:57.000 The Gav Crack. 0.93

00:09:59.000 Welcome back to the Gav Crack. 0.99

00:10:01.000 Show from My Crack, In My Crack, about My Crack.

00:10:05.000 Oh, it's a documentary?

00:10:07.000 This is getting even juicier.

00:10:10.000 I was surprised, by the way, with that opening song, how good Ian Mackay is at singing, not screaming.

00:10:20.000 Oh, so it's a documentary, and there happens to be a song sung in it.

00:10:27.000 God, they were kind of tedious sometimes.

00:10:30.000 Like, Ian Mackay would get mad if the pit had too many men and wasn't perfectly balanced between male and female.

00:10:38.000 Sorry, women don't like to thrash. 1.00

00:10:41.000 Instrument soundtrack.

00:10:42.000 Okay, what's that?

00:10:44.000 What was the song that we opened?

00:10:45.000 I'm So Tired?

00:10:46.000 I'm So Tired.

00:10:47.000 Okay, so that was a track on there.

00:10:48.000 Do you recognize the other songs?

00:10:50.000 No, not one of them.

00:10:51.000 Well, let me see here another one.

00:10:52.000 Pink Frosty.

00:10:53.000 The following is for reference only.

00:11:00.000 Sounds like I let a shitty album slip through the cracks.

00:11:05.000 Do another one.

00:11:06.000 Let's hop.

00:11:08.000 We're on!

00:11:09.000 We're rolling!

00:11:23.000 I know why they slipped through my crack because it's shit.

00:11:30.000 Okay, I'll research that more later.

00:11:32.000 It doesn't look like it's anything.

00:11:33.000 And then another, I keep wanting to say reader submission, I guess, from my magazine days.

00:11:40.000 Some Scottish dude, or maybe he's Irish.

00:11:43.000 Oh, he's Scottish.

00:11:46.000 Kind of a good folky guy to get drunk to.

00:11:52.000 David Francie, The Broken Heart of Everything.

00:11:55.000 Oh, shoot.

00:11:57.000 Dude, I forgot this is a live show.

00:12:00.000 Yeah.

00:12:01.000 So you got to do some reads.

00:12:02.000 We got to do the reads.

00:12:03.000 This is our Thursday night free show.

00:12:05.000 Oh, folks.

00:12:06.000 If you're watching this for free, you can't see, or you're listening to it, you can't see it.

00:12:12.000 The studio is black.

00:12:15.000 What is going on with the shot here?

00:12:19.000 Okay, things are not going well.

00:12:21.000 We've been having some difficulties.

00:12:25.000 I don't know what the future of this network is, to be honest.

00:12:29.000 We're going to have some lighting problems, some sound problems.

00:12:31.000 We can't take calls.

00:12:34.000 But the show must go on.

00:12:36.000 How am I?

00:12:37.000 Why am I so close?

00:12:39.000 Oh, for fuck's sakes.

00:12:43.000 So let's thank our first sponsor, of course, Nita Fashions.

00:12:47.000 Nita Fashions is in Hong Kong, but they will get to you via Zoom.

00:12:54.000 So click on contact us.

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00:13:02.000 You can also go to info at nitafashions.com.

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00:13:09.000 I would like Hong Kong, but the humidity is probably insufferable.

00:13:13.000 You can go to their website, that's their website, their Instagram, and DM them there.

00:13:19.000 And the beauty of their Instagram, of course, you can see all their new fabrics.

00:13:21.000 So this is how it works now.

00:13:24.000 I'm sure they'll travel to you in the future where they rent a hotel room in your town and you go and check it out and then they measure you and all that stuff.

00:13:30.000 But it's really simple.

00:13:32.000 They just do the measurements on the Zoom call.

00:13:34.000 You get one of those Taylor things, put that around your neck, and hang yourself and go fuck off.

00:13:39.000 No, just kidding.

00:13:40.000 You put that around your neck, you measure yourself, measure your waist, your thighs, whatever you're in, seam. 0.53

00:13:44.000 You should have someone there with you.

00:13:46.000 They write down all your measurements.

00:13:47.000 Then they can send you swatches of materials.

00:13:49.000 Next thing you know, you got a suit, and the prices are amazing.

00:13:52.000 You can get a shirt from anywhere from $50 to $300.

00:13:56.000 You can get a suit anywhere from $800 to $3,000.

00:13:59.000 It's up to you.

00:14:00.000 And you add all the details, what kind of collar you like.

00:14:03.000 And I keep saying this.

00:14:04.000 Oh, look, there's me.

00:14:06.000 It's who I use.

00:14:07.000 They're my personal tailor.

00:14:08.000 You get your name in it.

00:14:09.000 They put your name in the suit, which will feel cool to give to my kids when I'm old.

00:14:16.000 But it just feels, when you wear a custom suit, you don't feel like you're wearing a suit.

00:14:22.000 You know, you keep the suit you're wearing right now.

00:14:25.000 Your shirts, you can't do your top button.

00:14:27.000 The waist is tight because you put on weight.

00:14:29.000 I put on weight once, and I sent all my pants back to them, and they expanded them, and then sent them back to me.

00:14:35.000 That's the founder guy.

00:14:36.000 That's the dad.

00:14:38.000 That guy there.

00:14:40.000 And yeah, they're open ideas.

00:14:42.000 You can have a slim fit, box fit, skinny, fat, whatever you want.

00:14:46.000 Room for a sweater underneath.

00:14:48.000 Look, they even made that schlub look hot.

00:14:50.000 Is that Omar Rodrigo?

00:14:52.000 That's Eric Andre.

00:14:55.000 So NitaFashions.com, thank you very much for sponsoring the show.

00:15:01.000 And we hope that you get customers because we appreciate your business.

00:15:06.000 I like Indians in Hong Kong. 1.00

00:15:07.000 They're so apolitical.

00:15:09.000 They're just like, oh, so you are a Trump supporter, yes?

00:15:14.000 Yes, so you must be happy because your president, the one you wanted to win, won.

00:15:18.000 And then when Biden wins, I understand you're disappointed because you do not like Biden.

00:15:23.000 No, like, fuck you.

00:15:25.000 They don't have any skin in the game.

00:15:28.000 You got to be proud of you, boys.

00:15:30.000 This show will be very heavy on the viewer mail due to the lack of the phone system in here.

00:15:38.000 Okay, it's doing it again.

00:15:40.000 I'm close up.

00:15:43.000 I don't know what the future of this network is, to be honest.

00:15:46.000 What's with my audio, too?

00:15:50.000 Oh, Jesus, H Christ.

00:15:52.000 Dude.

00:15:54.000 How do you feel, Ryan?

00:15:56.000 Confident, gay, unconfident. 0.98

00:15:58.000 Confident, gay, unconfident. 0.98

00:16:01.000 CGU.

00:16:02.000 That's his new nickname.

00:16:04.000 That's my university.

00:16:05.000 I graduated with honors.

00:16:06.000 By the way, I forgot to mention last weekend I saw the Mitchells Against the Machines.

00:16:12.000 I cried six times.

00:16:14.000 Is it cute?

00:16:15.000 Is it cute?

00:16:16.000 God, you're a faggot. 1.00

00:16:18.000 It's not quote-unquote cute.

00:16:21.000 It's a very good movie.

00:16:22.000 There's a real heart tugging at the heartstrings part where, or general theme throughout the movie with the father and his daughter, and she's becoming a teen, which I identify with because my daughter's becoming a teen and I feel like I'm losing her a little bit.

00:16:35.000 You know, they're both at that stage, my eldest two kids, with the sort of like, I don't know.

00:16:40.000 Like at one time I said, that guy you hang out with, is that a guy or a girl?

00:16:43.000 And she went, what?

00:16:45.000 I go, is that a guy or a girl?

00:16:49.000 What?

00:16:50.000 I couldn't tell if she was fucking with me or she didn't get my question.

00:16:53.000 But a lot of like, I don't know.

00:16:55.000 Well, what'd you do?

00:16:56.000 How was your art class today?

00:16:58.000 Fine.

00:16:58.000 I don't know.

00:17:00.000 So that's the general theme of this movie.

00:17:04.000 And this is him giving up on his cabin in the woods because the family shouldn't be in the middle of nowhere, which I did.

00:17:09.000 I designed my own cabin in the woods.

00:17:11.000 I didn't physically build it, but I designed it myself exactly to my specs.

00:17:15.000 Had a urinal in the basement, open to above, in the living room.

00:17:20.000 Cool, like old recycled wood kind of bookshelf stuck in the middle of the living room and home theater and all this air hockey and all this cool shit.

00:17:28.000 But the kids hated it because it was a five-mile drive to any other kid.

00:17:37.000 And that's in this movie.

00:17:39.000 And it's pretty conservative.

00:17:41.000 It's very, very pro-family.

00:17:43.000 In fact, in the credits, they show everyone who worked on the movie as a picture with their family.

00:17:49.000 We all want to be the perfect family.

00:17:51.000 Yeah.

00:17:52.000 I think those are the ones who worked on it.

00:17:54.000 Maybe it's a Hispanic dude, and that's why it's so pro-family Catholic. 0.99

00:17:58.000 They're allowed to get away with that.

00:17:59.000 Yeah, so it was the movie in the Heights I mentioned the other day.

00:18:03.000 Very family.

00:18:03.000 Washington Heights is not great at maintaining a family.

00:18:07.000 Multiple families.

00:18:08.000 You start one over here, you leave that one, you start another one.

00:18:11.000 They're good at starting families.

00:18:12.000 It's not great at finishing them.

00:18:15.000 But it's got great action.

00:18:17.000 It's anti-screen.

00:18:19.000 It's kind of radical in that sense where they say maybe giving people, maybe everyone giving up their personal data for free wasn't such a great idea.

00:18:28.000 It gets you pumped.

00:18:29.000 Wait, play more of it.

00:18:30.000 I could watch it right now.

00:18:32.000 I love the animation, too.

00:18:34.000 It's CGI, but it's not annoying CGI.

00:18:36.000 And they keep doing that thing.

00:18:37.000 It's by the dudes who did Spider-Man the multiverse thing.

00:18:40.000 Oh, yeah.

00:18:41.000 It almost looks like claymation.

00:18:43.000 It almost looks like stop going.

00:18:45.000 I think CGI's finally reached a point where it doesn't annoy you.

00:18:52.000 He's really likable, a real patriarch.

00:18:54.000 He hates technology.

00:18:56.000 He's a big hunter.

00:18:58.000 And they cut to memes and stuff.

00:19:00.000 Really well done.

00:19:01.000 Had a great time.

00:19:03.000 I cried six times.

00:19:07.000 Good cries, though.

00:19:07.000 Not a faggy cry.

00:19:08.000 Right.

00:19:09.000 A real man cry. 0.99

00:19:10.000 And I was crying about how much I love my daughter.

00:19:13.000 That's not gay. 0.87

00:19:14.000 No.

00:19:14.000 That's actually machismo, believe it or not.

00:19:20.000 And then the other thing I forgot to talk about was at my local pub where Joe, the compulsive liar.

00:19:28.000 Did I talk about this yet?

00:19:30.000 I mean, I have a bunch, but we got a smart TV on the TV.

00:19:34.000 And I didn't, did you know this?

00:19:35.000 There's a smart TV, right, in your bar.

00:19:38.000 You go into pictures, you choose a picture, you do the send box, right, in the bottom left, then you scroll down, copy photo, add to shared item, slideshow.

00:19:50.000 Then there's airplay.

00:19:53.000 You click on airplay and it says which TV, the living room?

00:19:57.000 And you go, yes.

00:19:58.000 A code appears on the bar TV.

00:20:02.000 6961.

00:20:03.000 Type that in.

00:20:04.000 It's not 6961, but you get the idea.

00:20:06.000 And now you can resize the photo and everything.

00:20:09.000 You can play videos on the from your, are you laughing?

00:20:13.000 Because everyone knows this?

00:20:14.000 Yeah, why not?

00:20:15.000 Of course I know that.

00:20:17.000 It hadn't occurred to me to prank.

00:20:19.000 No, you can resize.

00:20:20.000 So I put up pictures.

00:20:22.000 He has Crohn's disease and he's been shitting a lot.

00:20:25.000 Right.

00:20:25.000 And he's also a compulsive liar.

00:20:27.000 So he denies he's been shitting a lot.

00:20:29.000 So we have photographic evidence of actual shit stains on his pants, shit he's left in the bathroom.

00:20:34.000 We've shown them on the show, right?

00:20:36.000 There's one in particular that I have stared at for about two days.

00:20:40.000 I suggest people take it with them on a road trip and try to figure it out.

00:20:44.000 It's like, what's that, Sudoku?

00:20:47.000 It's like the hardest Sudoku puzzle you could ever imagine.

00:20:51.000 Did you ever tell him, I don't know how much, I don't know where more shit comes out of your ass or your mouth, Joe.

00:20:57.000 Ever say that?

00:20:58.000 But funnier?

00:20:58.000 Punch it up.

00:20:59.000 You can't be funny with him.

00:21:00.000 He's too stupid.

00:21:01.000 Like, I secretly write the word faggot on the fireball. 1.00

00:21:06.000 And then I go, give me a fireball, faggot, to the bartender. 1.00

00:21:09.000 And then if it's a new guy or whatever, he goes, what?

00:21:12.000 And I go, that's what it's called.

00:21:14.000 That's right there.

00:21:15.000 I show him the bottle and go, what did you think?

00:21:17.000 So he, I think, thinks that's funny.

00:21:19.000 So then when I come in, he gives me the marker for some reason.

00:21:23.000 And he writes it himself.

00:21:24.000 And then he goes, he'll also say, hey, you want a faggot, faggot? 0.99

00:21:28.000 I'm like, Joe, that's not the joke.

00:21:31.000 That takes all the fun away.

00:21:33.000 So he lied about being a Marine, lied about EMT, lied about being a safety inspector.

00:21:40.000 And so our buddy Matt goes in there and says, he accepted a $100 tip on Memorial Day weekend as a Marine.

00:21:52.000 Now, I know what you're saying, Gavin, where the fuck were you?

00:21:54.000 Why didn't you take him out?

00:21:55.000 I was not there.

00:21:56.000 I found out about it later.

00:21:58.000 But so did Matt.

00:21:59.000 He ran over there and he's like, all right, this is what you're going to do.

00:22:02.000 You're going to get up here, stand up, and announce to the bar, repeat after me.

00:22:07.000 I'm not a Marine.

00:22:09.000 I'm not a Marine.

00:22:11.000 I was never a Marine.

00:22:12.000 I was never a Marine.

00:22:14.000 I was never in the military.

00:22:16.000 I was never in the military.

00:22:18.000 I was never an EMT.

00:22:20.000 I was never an EMT.

00:22:21.000 I was never a safety inspector.

00:22:23.000 I worked with a safety.

00:22:24.000 No, no, you were never a safety.

00:22:26.000 I was never a safety inspector, okay?

00:22:28.000 God.

00:22:29.000 Now, you're lucky you got away with that.

00:22:31.000 Lying about being a Marine, first of all, I believe it's a felony.

00:22:34.000 But a lot of these people at this bar, they were either vets or their family are still in the military and you're fucking taking a $100 tip on Memorial Day weekend?

00:22:46.000 Literally, how dare you?

00:22:49.000 How dare you?

00:22:52.000 So then his jig is up, right?

00:22:53.000 And he's not doing it anymore.

00:22:56.000 I thought that was a great dishonor.

00:22:58.000 He shits himself.

00:23:00.000 And so he says the other day to this guy, Jose, he goes, so good news.

00:23:05.000 I'm seeing a therapist about the lying thing.

00:23:08.000 And he goes, really?

00:23:10.000 Yeah, you guys are right.

00:23:11.000 It was getting out of hand.

00:23:12.000 And I got to stop.

00:23:13.000 So I'm seeing a therapist now.

00:23:15.000 Guess what Jose said?

00:23:16.000 What?

00:23:18.000 You're lying.

00:23:18.000 Exactly.

00:23:20.000 You're here from 9 a.m. till 11 p.m.

00:23:22.000 When does your therapist work?

00:23:24.000 Midnight?

00:23:24.000 She's a blue-collar therapist on the night shift?

00:23:28.000 Emergency services.

00:23:29.000 She was in the night shift therapy for all the construction dudes. 1.00

00:23:34.000 What?

00:23:35.000 So he lied about lie therapy.

00:23:42.000 Is that a good one or what?

00:23:44.000 Wow.

00:23:45.000 Wow.

00:23:46.000 Fucking wow.

00:23:47.000 Which brings us to our oldest sponsor we've ever had, Johnny Apple CBD.

00:23:53.000 jacbd.com.

00:23:55.000 What does that give you?

00:23:57.000 What is these gummies?

00:23:59.000 What are these guys selling?

00:24:00.000 What is the tincture?

00:24:02.000 What is the ointment?

00:24:03.000 It's marijuana.

00:24:04.000 Marijuana is illegal.

00:24:05.000 You can't be selling THC like that.

00:24:08.000 There's no THC.

00:24:09.000 All the illegal stuff is taken out.

00:24:10.000 Well, then it's useless because pot is only magic with THC and the illegal stuff.

00:24:15.000 Wrong.

00:24:17.000 Pot is magic without any of the illegal stuff.

00:24:22.000 The tincture in your coffee takes the edge off.

00:24:25.000 Look at this.

00:24:26.000 Brand new product.

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00:24:30.000 That's Ryan's shit with the vapes, right?

00:24:33.000 Vape it up, man.

00:24:36.000 The gummies help you get to sleep.

00:24:38.000 The CBD is great for sore muscles, and it's great for women wearing high-heel shoes.

00:24:47.000 Put the CBD ointment on your feet.

00:24:49.000 You're wearing high-heel shoes all night, no problem.

00:24:53.000 What's this now?

00:24:54.000 Oh, these are the flavors for the vape?

00:24:55.000 They got vape juice, brah.

00:24:57.000 Jesus.

00:24:59.000 It sold out for this.

00:25:00.000 They've blossomed so much, they've gone over my head.

00:25:02.000 I don't even know what half of these things are.

00:25:04.000 They've been with us since day one.

00:25:05.000 And if you use code Gavin, promo code Gavin, you get 20% off your order.

00:25:12.000 So I recommend going there, using that code, and going absolutely ballistic, getting a year's supply of everything.

00:25:18.000 And they also have the brain power, brain juice, Johnny Apple brain juice that wards off dumb thoughts and cancer.

00:25:28.000 Brain juice.

00:25:29.000 That's a hack to do that.

00:25:31.000 The new brain juice.

00:25:32.000 Yeah, johnnyapple.com, j-a-c-b-d.com.

00:25:36.000 Please go there now.

00:25:37.000 Use the promo code Gavin, and we thank them for supporting free speech since day one.

00:25:44.000 We have tactical walls coming up before we leave you and go behind the paywall and answer some emails, some letters.

00:25:55.000 We have a ton, and don't worry, I've gone through them all.

00:25:57.000 So they're all high-quality garbage.

00:26:01.000 But before we do that, I wanted to have a brief look at the war on Cops.

00:26:04.000 And I think this would be a good intro to Tactical Walls because they are all about self-defense.

00:26:10.000 And we are at the point now.

00:26:12.000 And I talk to cops on a regular basis, city cops, retired cops, Bronx cops.

00:26:18.000 They're all exactly the same as far as what they think has happened to the job.

00:26:22.000 The job is dead.

00:26:25.000 They don't go to things.

00:26:26.000 They don't go to calls.

00:26:28.000 They have been told that they're defunded.

00:26:30.000 I told you the other day that they're now adding certain banned maneuvers like knee on the back, the chokehold, any of this stuff.

00:26:39.000 That's now not just banned, but illegal.

00:26:42.000 So if you do it during an arrest, you're now liable.

00:26:44.000 You're no longer indemnified.

00:26:46.000 You can be sued, your personal bank account empty.

00:26:48.000 Even if it's the most bullshit suit ever, you have to use your lawyer, your money, to fight it.

00:26:53.000 What?

00:26:55.000 So why bother?

00:26:57.000 You know, if you're courting a girl and she makes it crystal clear she has no interest in you, you stop courting.

00:27:05.000 You don't want to fuck with her.

00:27:06.000 You turn around and walk away.

00:27:08.000 I don't want to fuck you.

00:27:10.000 And basically the police in New York, I can't speak to your town, but they're saying, we don't want to fuck with you.

00:27:16.000 We're done.

00:27:17.000 Fine.

00:27:17.000 Try it your way for a little bit.

00:27:20.000 And not only have they said, like, we don't like cops, they've said we're punishing cops if they do their job.

00:27:25.000 So it's not like it's their opinion where they go, I'm going to try not doing my job.

00:27:30.000 You made it impossible for them to do their job and taking their money away.

00:27:34.000 Dude, in Mount Vernon, where Larry Barnes is from, about 40 minutes north of New York City, the cops don't have money to put gas in their cars.

00:27:44.000 Mount Vernon is like Zimbabwe. 1.00

00:27:47.000 They eat the poo-poo in Mount Vernon. 0.99

00:27:51.000 And this one is eating the poopu all over the place.

00:27:54.000 I love that accent.

00:27:55.000 And this one is eating the poo-poo all over the place. 0.97

00:27:59.000 I love it.

00:28:00.000 African, Jamaican, Scottish.

00:28:03.000 I could listen to those accents.

00:28:05.000 Italian's pretty good.

00:28:06.000 I like Australian.

00:28:07.000 Australian, yeah.

00:28:09.000 I like it.

00:28:09.000 It's pretty fun.

00:28:10.000 But if you're fucking a girl and she's like, oh yeah, your cock is gorgeous. 1.00

00:28:14.000 That would stink.

00:28:15.000 Yeah, you don't want that accent.

00:28:16.000 Your cock is proper fit or whatnot. 0.59

00:28:19.000 Yeah, that's the same as, as bugged out, right?

00:28:21.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.

00:28:22.000 Yo! 1.00

00:28:24.000 On your feet, soldier!

00:28:26.000 So I wanted to have a brief look at the war on cops.

00:28:28.000 We don't have a bumper for the war on cops.

00:28:30.000 If someone could make one.

00:28:32.000 Oh, it's doing it again.

00:28:36.000 I got it.

00:28:37.000 Maintain.

00:28:38.000 I'm going to maintain.

00:28:40.000 Let's just get right back into it.

00:28:42.000 Without further ado, the war on cops.

00:28:49.000 Look at the shit they have to deal with.

00:28:53.000 This is really long, so I'll have to skip through it.

00:28:56.000 But he's got a gun in his hand.

00:28:57.000 We're talking to you, man.

00:29:04.000 Hey, drop it. 0.96

00:29:05.000 Don't pursue him.

00:29:06.000 Everything has been recorded, okay?

00:29:07.000 Everything is on camera.

00:29:11.000 Hey, buddy, just drop it, man.

00:29:19.000 Captains or lieutenants or whatever they're called who have told their rookies, the new guys, if you do shit like this and you go do police work, I'm going to kick your ass.

00:29:26.000 We don't need this tension at the station.

00:29:29.000 Don't be a good cop.

00:29:31.000 Don't be a cop is really what they're saying to the new kids.

00:29:37.000 We're going to lose this whole back bookshelf, too.

00:29:40.000 Say goodbye to that.

00:29:41.000 Ooh, that should be a good thing we show on the TVs.

00:29:43.000 A picture of the back.

00:29:44.000 Nice.

00:29:45.000 Nice.

00:29:47.000 That's a good job, man.

00:29:49.000 Go ahead.

00:29:51.000 So we got to skip a little bit.

00:29:53.000 Yeah, they go for a walk with him.

00:29:59.000 They're walking around with him.

00:30:11.000 Should have just done that from the beginning.

00:30:14.000 Hey, you with the gun. 0.97

00:30:16.000 Put the gun down.

00:30:17.000 No, okay.

00:30:19.000 Next.

00:30:24.000 So there's a cop down back there.

00:30:29.000 Why didn't you put the...

00:30:30.000 I would be like, why didn't you put the fucking gun down?

00:30:33.000 Yeah.

00:30:34.000 What were you thinking?

00:30:42.000 So they have to arrest the guy now.

00:30:46.000 Why has he got black gloves on?

00:30:47.000 Is there anything crazy?

00:30:49.000 Yeah.

00:30:51.000 And then there's another cop over there.

00:30:52.000 He's saying, where were you hit?

00:30:53.000 Where were you hit?

00:30:55.000 Look at this.

00:30:57.000 See that?

00:30:58.000 Wait, go back.

00:30:59.000 You see how instantaneous it is?

00:31:02.000 Like, go back.

00:31:03.000 It's like, how many frames is that?

00:31:04.000 Can you go frame by frame?

00:31:07.000 Okay, let's do frame of stop.

00:31:09.000 Frame by frame.

00:31:11.000 So let's say here.

00:31:12.000 Okay, let's say here.

00:31:13.000 In the pocket.

00:31:13.000 Yep.

00:31:14.000 One, two, three, five, six, eight, nine, ten.

00:31:18.000 And look, he puts his hand over it.

00:31:23.000 In like 18 frames, like 20 frames.

00:31:25.000 And it's 27 frames a second, right?

00:31:27.000 At least it is with animation.

00:31:28.000 24.

00:31:29.000 It could be 30 or 60 for here.

00:31:31.000 So this could be really a fraction of what I'm saying.

00:31:32.000 I know it's doing very good math.

00:31:34.000 But we're talking about a tenth of a second, maybe.

00:31:37.000 You have to react.

00:31:39.000 Yeah, that's it right there.

00:31:42.000 And that guy didn't get shot.

00:31:45.000 Ready?

00:31:45.000 And that's how long.

00:31:48.000 And then I think the guy with the body cam gets shot.

00:31:50.000 No, they both got shot.

00:31:52.000 That's it.

00:31:52.000 But this was in the vest or something?

00:31:55.000 Let's see it.

00:31:57.000 Go.

00:32:01.000 That's the other thing, too.

00:32:02.000 When they go, the victim had 50 bullets in him.

00:32:04.000 The cops are just laughing, standing over him, shooting.

00:32:06.000 That's how many bullets you see in one second.

00:32:15.000 Anyway, you're not hearing a dying cop.

00:32:17.000 You're hearing an injured cop.

00:32:19.000 They went to the hospital and they left.

00:32:22.000 And of course, with the perp, I know you're wondering what happened to him.

00:32:27.000 I looked into it.

00:32:27.000 Who cares?

00:32:31.000 I saw this article in the New York Times, Gray Lady Down.

00:32:37.000 By the way, a lot of cops hate body cams.

00:32:39.000 You think, well, that vindicates you.

00:32:41.000 No, because the media will take the worst clip from the body cam, and then that's what goes viral.

00:32:47.000 And now they're showing up at your house ready to kill you.

00:32:49.000 Oh, I haven't seen that angle.

00:33:00.000 Bam.

00:33:02.000 What a fucking job, huh?

00:33:06.000 I would be in depends.

00:33:11.000 Any job, military cop, any job where I could be shot at, I would be constantly pooping.

00:33:16.000 I poop.

00:33:18.000 Oh, look, he's got blood on it.

00:33:19.000 I guess he got shot in the hand.

00:33:20.000 I'm shitting my pants when I spar with friends who have agreed not to hit me too hard.

00:33:26.000 That makes me nervous.

00:33:33.000 I guess that might be a pussy, I think, is the term. 1.00

00:33:36.000 That's the street vernacular.

00:33:40.000 Look, he keeps going from white to black, black to white.

00:33:42.000 Is he telling him to die?

00:33:46.000 It's over here.

00:33:47.000 Oh, the perp is yelling, die.

00:33:48.000 Yeah.

00:33:56.000 It's over here.

00:33:57.000 It's over here.

00:34:02.000 Look at this horrible stat.

00:34:03.000 The New York Times is really worried about.

00:34:05.000 48 black women killed by police in just six years.

00:34:11.000 So that's what?

00:34:13.000 Eight times six?

00:34:15.000 Wait, no, you dumbass.

00:34:16.000 You just ruined the whole fucking thing.

00:34:18.000 3-0.

00:34:26.000 48 black women killed by the police since 2015.

00:34:29.000 So that's six years, right?

00:34:31.000 Eight times six is 48, I believe.

00:34:36.000 So eight a year.

00:34:38.000 And they say only two charges.

00:34:41.000 Yeah.

00:34:41.000 What were the cases?

00:34:43.000 Here, go to a tour thing in Brave.

00:34:47.000 I find that kind of works.

00:34:48.000 I think what happened is I killed my credit card, so all my subscriptions are out.

00:34:54.000 I highly recommend you do that.

00:34:55.000 But once a year, throw your credit card away.

00:34:58.000 And then you get all this shit like premium YouTube, which you never used.

00:35:02.000 Of course, you stay with censored.tv.

00:35:05.000 Don't get crazy now.

00:35:07.000 We're here to deliver sanity into your life.

00:35:10.000 Don't be stupid at either.

00:35:11.000 Don't do nothing stupid.

00:35:14.000 Trust me, if you get rid of censored.tv, your sanity will start chipping away.

00:35:19.000 I'm the only thing keeping you alive right now, keeping you out of the Bellevue loony bin, because I am like you and I'm totally rational about things.

00:35:29.000 And when I see this, I go, okay, I'm not taking that at face value.

00:35:33.000 What's the math?

00:35:34.000 What were they doing?

00:35:36.000 Eight a year out of how many millions of interactions with police and how many of them were charging at police?

00:35:44.000 How many of them had a knife?

00:35:45.000 How many of them were trying to kill a cop with a gun?

00:35:48.000 How many of them were refusing to cooperate and screaming their fucking heads off?

00:35:51.000 Of course it's done by a child.

00:35:53.000 Like go up to the author.

00:35:54.000 Always check the author, boys.

00:35:57.000 What's happening?

00:35:58.000 Are you in a...

00:35:59.000 I'm still incognitro, but it's...

00:36:01.000 It doesn't care about me.

00:36:03.000 It found you out.

00:36:03.000 Anyway, it's written by some child, some little kid who's like just graduated from school with a monobrow, but has an ethnic name, so it checks off that affirmative action box.

00:36:14.000 And she goes off about just focusing on how few police have been charged with the 48 women who have been killed by police.

00:36:22.000 Doesn't get into the case and whether they were innocent or not.

00:36:25.000 Just Breonna Taylor.

00:36:27.000 They weren't prosecuted.

00:36:29.000 Wait a minute.

00:36:30.000 They were prosecuted with Breonna Taylor, weren't they?

00:36:31.000 Even though he was innocent?

00:36:33.000 Look at her.

00:36:33.000 Allison Hardasani Gupta.

00:36:36.000 I have a Hardasani.

00:36:38.000 I put in the phrase.

00:36:39.000 The system that killed Breonna Taylor.

00:36:41.000 The system that killed Breonna Taylor was drugs. 0.88

00:36:45.000 There she is.

00:36:46.000 Hello.

00:36:46.000 I'm going to tell you the name.

00:36:49.000 Okay, so let's say that's eight a year.

00:36:52.000 Let's just for fun pretend that they were innocent black women who were just going to get groceries, right? 1.00

00:36:57.000 Out of 331 million people, obviously any innocent life lost is terrible, but that's eight innocent black women killed a year.

00:37:05.000 Now let's jump to the number of cops killed here.

00:37:10.000 Number of police officers shot this year reaches 128.

00:37:15.000 Union says defund movement is a factor.

00:37:18.000 That's in the past six months.

00:37:21.000 Now I know you say, well, how many of them died?

00:37:23.000 They're willing, A, they're wearing bulletproof vests.

00:37:26.000 B, their job is to not get shot.

00:37:28.000 So when you hear about cops getting shot and not dying, it's not because they just had good luck.

00:37:35.000 This is their job.

00:37:36.000 Their job is avoiding it.

00:37:37.000 So I think the number of cops being shot is much more relevant in the case of cops than with others.

00:37:45.000 128 shot in six months.

00:37:48.000 Eight women killed a year in America.

00:37:53.000 Black women. 1.00

00:37:55.000 Who deserves a movement?

00:37:57.000 Who has the numbers behind them?

00:37:59.000 Black Lives Matter or Blue Lives Matter? 0.72

00:38:01.000 Clearly it's Blue Lives Matter. 0.77

00:38:02.000 Can we stop with the fucking fashion, please?

00:38:06.000 Anyway, if you care about this, there's a law enforcement loyalty pack 3-2.

00:38:12.000 What's the actual URL, Ryan?

00:38:15.000 It is anna.anedot.com slash law enforcement loyalty pack.

00:38:22.000 I think if you just Google Law Enforcement Loyalty Pack, you'll end up there.

00:38:25.000 And what does the little card say?

00:38:27.000 These cowards don't care about the real people.

00:38:29.000 They are hurting.

00:38:29.000 They don't care, but I do.

00:38:31.000 And I hope you do as well.

00:38:33.000 I'm a former cop and I'm working with Law Enforcement Loyalty Pack.

00:38:35.000 I need to know if you were standing with us.

00:38:39.000 No parades for that kid.

00:38:41.000 No one knows his name.

00:38:43.000 Lost a father or a mother, likely a father.

00:38:48.000 Let's see A World Without Cops, just to end this segment. 0.51

00:38:55.000 Here we are.

00:38:55.000 So this is San Francisco, one of the progenitors of the Defund the Police movement.

00:39:00.000 Let's see how that's working out for you, San Francisco.

00:39:03.000 Guy is in there, for those of you just listening to the audio.

00:39:05.000 He brought an empty garbage bag.

00:39:08.000 It's not a small one, too.

00:39:09.000 It's a contractor bag.

00:39:11.000 Or one of those big, huge black kitchen bags.

00:39:15.000 And he's just loading it up with beauty products, which he's probably, I guess, going to sell.

00:39:21.000 And there's the security guard who seems to be female Dominican.

00:39:27.000 The community can police itself, so let's see that in action.

00:39:30.000 Yeah, let's see the community police itself.

00:39:32.000 What the fuck is that noise?

00:39:35.000 Oh my god, not again, not again, not a fucking gun.

00:39:39.000 Look at this.

00:39:40.000 And look at this half-ass attempt.

00:39:41.000 Hey, I want that.

00:39:44.000 It doesn't do anything.

00:39:45.000 It didn't.

00:39:47.000 All the security guard did was move it from the top of his bike to the side of his bike.

00:39:54.000 I got to see that again.

00:39:56.000 He made the camera angle a little shittier.

00:40:00.000 So he actually helped the perp.

00:40:02.000 Because the closest he could have been to identifying him.

00:40:05.000 Thanks for filming it, Security Guard.

00:40:07.000 Look, the Karen is doing more work than the Security Guard. 0.70

00:40:10.000 Can't you tackle him?

00:40:16.000 And that's free stuff from Walgreens, San Francisco.

00:40:20.000 Bye.

00:40:21.000 When junkies are sick, they have...

00:40:24.000 They'll shoot their mother right in the face. 0.99

00:40:26.000 Does this help?

00:40:26.000 Will this get me smacked?

00:40:27.000 Bye, mom.

00:40:29.000 So unless you have serious law and order and you physically stop them from stealing, they're going to be stealing.

00:40:38.000 Okay, so let's end this before we get to the lets with Tactical Walls.

00:40:43.000 New client, fun client, great way to store your firearms.

00:40:49.000 They also do sports, trucks, limitless stuff.

00:40:52.000 Places to hide your guns, place to show off your guns.

00:40:55.000 It's vet made, it's American-made.

00:40:57.000 The promo code is Gavin.

00:40:59.000 Gives you 20% off.

00:41:00.000 Look at all these cool shells.

00:41:02.000 The shells have this thing where you slide over like a little statue, it releases a magnet, and then ka-chunk-ka-chunk, out comes your fucking gun.

00:41:09.000 So you don't have to worry about your kids getting a hold of it, but they do all kinds of stuff.

00:41:14.000 Go back to the site.

00:41:16.000 Look at the variety of products there.

00:41:18.000 There's the issue box where you hide a handgun.

00:41:21.000 I won't embarrass myself by getting the details of the guns, but keep going here.

00:41:27.000 Yeah, use it for your workshop. 0.97

00:41:29.000 You put your tools there.

00:41:31.000 Everything looks organized and beautiful.

00:41:32.000 You open up your garage door.

00:41:34.000 Everything is in order.

00:41:35.000 And just like when Jordan Peterson says, clean your room.

00:41:38.000 When your workshop is in order, it just makes you do projects more.

00:41:42.000 You'll notice if your desk is just covered in crap, you don't feel like working until you clean it up.

00:41:46.000 It's the same with your workshop.

00:41:48.000 And Tactical Walls can help you with that.

00:41:50.000 They can also, you spent a fortune on these guns.

00:41:52.000 Don't have them in a drawer.

00:41:54.000 Display them.

00:41:54.000 Have them ready to grab.

00:41:56.000 Look how cool that looks.

00:41:58.000 That's right out of Batman's Cave.

00:42:01.000 Or what's it called?

00:42:03.000 Kingfish?

00:42:04.000 Kingsman.

00:42:05.000 Kingsman.

00:42:06.000 It's right out of the Kingsman.

00:42:07.000 So scroll through that.

00:42:09.000 Fill up your cart.

00:42:10.000 Use the promo code Gavin.

00:42:12.000 Get yourself 20% off.

00:42:14.000 Support free speech.

00:42:16.000 Support this show.

00:42:17.000 Support veterans.

00:42:18.000 And support American business at tacticalwalls.com.

00:42:25.000 All right.

00:42:26.000 Oh, we have the final video.

00:42:29.000 We don't usually do this on the live show, but let's do it anyway today.

00:42:32.000 Let's do the final video.

00:42:33.000 I want to show you this brutal attack in a world without cops where people just are taking care of the person they've wanted to shoot for a long time.

00:42:58.000 Now, infrared light is weird.

00:43:00.000 These night lights distort the races.

00:43:02.000 I can't really tell if we're looking at whites, Hispanics, or blacks.

00:43:06.000 I think they're white.

00:43:09.000 We're usually showing African-American BIPOCs shooting each other, but this appears to be those not from the Caucasus Mountains, which are nowhere near India, by the way. 0.91

00:43:19.000 I don't know who told you that.

00:43:21.000 Yeah, those are white people, right?

00:43:23.000 Yes.

00:43:24.000 And you can tell, but are they Hispanic?

00:43:26.000 Maybe.

00:43:28.000 I don't think so.

00:43:31.000 I don't see a lot of blondes. 1.00

00:43:34.000 But the clothes seem very college-y.

00:43:36.000 Yeah.

00:43:37.000 Maybe even white trashy. 1.00

00:43:38.000 Wiggers. 1.00

00:43:39.000 Is there anything in the comments to say where this is?

00:43:45.000 Not a lot of comments for such a wild video.

00:43:48.000 I've seen this.

00:43:49.000 Mob and Shizz. 1.00

00:43:50.000 So I thought you mute Mob and Shiz because you get depressed by all the ghetto action. 0.95

00:43:55.000 No, I don't.

00:43:56.000 On the new one, I leave it rock.

00:43:59.000 My wife said, why do you look at that stuff?

00:44:00.000 And I go, I don't know.

00:44:02.000 I guess I'm developing a thicker skin.

00:44:04.000 Did you see the one I sent you with the woman's butt implant? 1.00

00:44:08.000 Yes.

00:44:08.000 Oh, f.

00:44:11.000 So this is not safer work for anybody, realizing.

00:44:13.000 Yeah, we're about to watch a person be murdered.

00:44:15.000 Okay.

00:44:21.000 Yeah.

00:44:22.000 Bang, bang, bang. 0.89

00:44:23.000 Point blank.

00:44:24.000 I think that might be the bouncer.

00:44:26.000 Oh, really?

00:44:28.000 Look, and then they come back for him.

00:44:32.000 It's odd.

00:44:33.000 Alright, so he's got some hype sneakers.

00:44:35.000 Now look at the fat guy.

00:44:36.000 This is what I don't get.

00:44:39.000 He appears to be black, actually.

00:44:42.000 I think he might be a black bouncer. 0.91

00:44:44.000 He's dressed well, right?

00:44:45.000 And the rest of them are dressed like whatever kids.

00:44:49.000 He was a black bouncer. 0.83

00:44:50.000 He told them to go fuck themselves.

00:44:51.000 They're losers.

00:44:52.000 And then they went and got a gun and decided to kill him and ruin their lives in the process.

00:44:56.000 He's got three im reflective sneakers, like hype sneakers.

00:45:00.000 I don't think that's relevant.

00:45:01.000 Why are you bringing that up?

00:45:02.000 Wigger or college kid? 0.64

00:45:06.000 Oh, you mean that kid, the shooter?

00:45:07.000 The shooter.

00:45:08.000 Look at the girl at the beginning, though.

00:45:10.000 She's just like, hey, what are you doing with that gun? 0.77

00:45:12.000 Put that away, you guys.

00:45:14.000 And then this fat so wanders out, dudes, what are you doing? 1.00

00:45:18.000 You shouldn't kill people.

00:45:22.000 Oh, I guess she doesn't know they have a gun.

00:45:25.000 Look, people are still sort of sticking around.

00:45:28.000 And that fat guy, I Can't get over him.

00:45:31.000 Hey, dude.

00:45:32.000 He just moved his leg.

00:45:33.000 That's kind of fucked up, just for the record.

00:45:36.000 Isn't that weird?

00:45:37.000 And when he goes in to shoot him again, yeah, he just moves his foot.

00:45:40.000 He's like, oh, sorry, I'm in your way.

00:45:42.000 People are getting shot.

00:45:43.000 I'm good.

00:45:44.000 Yeah, I didn't like him either, man.

00:45:45.000 I shouldn't have killed that guy.

00:45:46.000 You know, that's illegal, right?

00:45:48.000 Here you go.

00:45:48.000 Look at the leg.

00:45:49.000 The fat man's foot.

00:45:51.000 Oh, I'm sorry.

00:45:51.000 Oh, I should move my foot of the way if you're going to keep shooting.

00:45:53.000 There you go.

00:45:54.000 Yeah, you've done it.

00:45:55.000 And he's talking with his oversized Mountain Dew King can.

00:45:58.000 I killed to know what he's saying.

00:46:01.000 Holy shit.

00:46:02.000 That is surreal.

00:46:02.000 It's never going to be the same again.

00:46:04.000 No, that's fucked.

00:46:05.000 All right, now we're going behind the paywall.

00:46:07.000 I'm sorry we can't take calls.

00:46:12.000 You know, I already am so dumb and concussed that someone stole our garden hose.

00:46:19.000 Damn.

00:46:19.000 And I was like, son of a bitch.

00:46:21.000 I don't know why it made me so mad because our garden hose is...

00:46:25.000 What?

00:46:25.000 The tape?

00:46:26.000 Our garden hose is way back.

00:46:28.000 You know, like by the house.

00:46:29.000 This is in the front lawn.

00:46:30.000 So that means they really end up in the bathroom.

00:46:31.000 They really did the balls to really go in there.

00:46:34.000 So like, you cocksucker. 0.99

00:46:37.000 So I'm determined to catch the guy.

00:46:39.000 And I'm going back through my cameras.

00:46:41.000 And I realize, shit, this happened like two weeks ago.

00:46:44.000 Now I go back.

00:46:45.000 I'm not going to tell you how long, but a long ass time.

00:46:47.000 So I'm not that worried about it.

00:46:48.000 But how did I miss this?

00:46:50.000 And I'm scrolling and I'm scrolling.

00:46:53.000 And then I find the fucker.

00:46:57.000 His name is me.

00:46:59.000 Oh, no.

00:47:01.000 I removed it.

00:47:02.000 It was hanging over the fence.

00:47:03.000 We had some people over.

00:47:04.000 We were having a nice party and it just looked ugly and dirty.

00:47:07.000 So I unscrewed it and threw it in the garage at the back.

00:47:10.000 Oh, my God.

00:47:11.000 And I'm like, I got the son of a bit.

00:47:14.000 Is that Donald Sutherland with AIDS?

00:47:17.000 Did Kiefer Sutherland lose his job?

00:47:20.000 Is Wolfred Brimley anorexic?

00:47:23.000 That's me.

00:47:26.000 Anyway, folks.

00:47:27.000 What are you going to do to yourself to punish yourself?

00:47:30.000 I'm going to hit my foreskin against cutting block with a ball peen hammer. 0.84

00:47:34.000 Ew.

00:47:36.000 I've got to make sure it doesn't happen again.

00:47:37.000 Can I watch?

00:47:38.000 Yeah, you can watch.

00:47:39.000 We're going to do it on the show.

00:47:40.000 Nice.

00:47:42.000 So, yeah.

00:47:45.000 What is going on with the...

00:47:48.000 Oh, so don't hang up.

00:47:50.000 Well, we're not taking calls, but don't leave if you are paying for this service.

00:47:54.000 We're about to go behind the paywall.

00:47:56.000 As far as the freeloaders, goodbye.

00:47:58.000 But in the interim, get fired.

00:48:00.000 Get in trouble.

00:48:01.000 Be brave.

00:48:02.000 And never stop fighting.

00:48:36.000 Spit it all with me.

00:48:39.000 All right.

00:48:40.000 Let's head over to.

00:48:43.000 Oh, wait, I didn't show you that shit pic.

00:48:45.000 Can you pull that up?

00:48:46.000 Shit pic.

00:48:46.000 Oh, I sent it to myself for fuck's sakes.

00:48:50.000 Shit pic.

00:48:52.000 Shit, welcome back to shit pics.

00:48:55.000 It's like ridiculousness, but it's all shit.

00:48:58.000 That'd be so cool.

00:49:02.000 Man, what is this?

00:49:05.000 You saw this?

00:49:07.000 Yeah, I did see that.

00:49:09.000 I wish we had earlier footage.

00:49:13.000 Imagine you come out to get your car and it's 100% gone.

00:49:18.000 I pray no one was in the car.

00:49:20.000 Yes, sure.

00:49:22.000 I pray just only Ted Kennedy's intern was the only one there.

00:49:27.000 My God.

00:49:29.000 I'd never seen a car just disappear like that before.

00:49:33.000 It's really perfect.

00:49:35.000 You know what's kind of scary is that the brake lights are on.

00:49:38.000 So maybe somebody is in there.

00:49:41.000 Oh, that's bad.

00:49:42.000 What a fucking horrible way to die.

00:49:45.000 That's got to sus-sis-sis-sis-sus-suck. 1.00

00:49:49.000 Oh, well.

00:49:50.000 I wonder how I'm going to die.

00:49:53.000 So look at the poo pick I sent you. 1.00

00:49:55.000 Okay, poo pick sent.

00:49:56.000 This is from Joe.

00:49:57.000 Well, I'm not 100% sure.

00:49:58.000 I'm quite sure.

00:50:00.000 Warning, grossed, if you're eating, don't look, don't look.

00:50:03.000 Spoiler.

00:50:03.000 Holy shit.

00:50:05.000 Now, obviously you say holy shit right away when you first see it, right?

00:50:09.000 But...

00:50:10.000 Wow.

00:50:13.000 Some people say, oh, did he sit too far back?

00:50:15.000 How?

00:50:17.000 And they go, what's the white?

00:50:19.000 Well, the white is he has Crohn's disease, so he's constantly shitting his own pants. 0.68

00:50:22.000 So I think he puts tissue paper up there, and then he shits his crack, and then he scoops it out.

00:50:29.000 Oh my God, I think I may have finally figured it out.

00:50:33.000 This has taken me six months.

00:50:35.000 Oh, this is the Sudoku puzzle.

00:50:36.000 Yeah.

00:50:37.000 Yeah.

00:50:38.000 You ready for this?

00:50:40.000 Yes.

00:50:41.000 Oh, my God.

00:50:42.000 I can't wait to tell the others at the bar.

00:50:45.000 I also put this on the screen.

00:50:46.000 And I put it, I forgot to tell all these stories about it.

00:50:49.000 I put this on the screen.

00:50:50.000 I put pictures of him sleeping.

00:50:51.000 He got caught in Arizona faking being a nurse.

00:50:55.000 So I have the paperwork that the National Nurse Council issues these impersonators, these forms, because it's dangerous, right?

00:51:03.000 Hey, I'm a nurse.

00:51:04.000 You should take this much insulin.

00:51:08.000 Like, you can kill people.

00:51:09.000 So they put out these things.

00:51:11.000 Joe has a cease and desist.

00:51:12.000 I put that up.

00:51:14.000 I put up his resume, which is insane.

00:51:16.000 Oh, my God.

00:51:17.000 I should show all this shit.

00:51:18.000 It is fucking gold.

00:51:20.000 Actually, why not, right?

00:51:22.000 Is that legal or whatever?

00:51:23.000 Yeah, it's all public knowledge.

00:51:25.000 I love how we're always so worried about criminals' rights.

00:51:30.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.

00:51:34.000 Yeah, maybe I should just do the resume.

00:51:37.000 This is hilarious, though.

00:51:38.000 Like, this guy is what a so active piece of shit.

00:51:42.000 Yeah.

00:51:43.000 Cease and desist.

00:51:45.000 His resume is amazing.

00:51:46.000 I got to find it.

00:51:47.000 But here's what happened with the shit.

00:51:51.000 Sorry, I'm doing too much at once here.

00:51:52.000 I'm supposed to be reading letters.

00:51:54.000 So here's my theory, right?

00:51:55.000 His ass is covered in shit.

00:51:58.000 Because he shit his pants.

00:51:59.000 Yeah, off to a bad Start.

00:52:02.000 Wait a minute, go back to the picture.

00:52:06.000 Okay, so this one's going to take some suspension of disbelief, but he goes, oh my God.

00:52:11.000 So he, oh, I know.

00:52:12.000 He knows there's shit all over his ass, so he can't use the seat.

00:52:15.000 So he lifts both the lid and the seat up, right?

00:52:19.000 And then he sort of squats down and tries to push out what's there.

00:52:25.000 Okay.

00:52:26.000 Right?

00:52:26.000 Yeah.

00:52:27.000 And he hears like a I'm done.

00:52:31.000 And then he's like, I'm done.

00:52:32.000 And he's so like dumb.

00:52:33.000 Maybe he takes like a big roll and he wipes what he can off of there.

00:52:37.000 Then he throws that in and then he stuffs tissue paper in whatever's left in the mess.

00:52:43.000 He doesn't realize that he's left a bunch of Nutella in the crack, the very back of the seat.

00:52:49.000 Then when he closes the seat, it squooshes out the other side like Play-Doh.

00:53:00.000 That's what's going on.

00:53:01.000 You're like Colonbo. 1.00

00:53:03.000 I'm Sherlock Holes.

00:53:08.000 But let me...

00:53:09.000 Shitlock Holmes.

00:53:10.000 Shitlock Holmes is much better, yeah.

00:53:13.000 Let me see if I can find his resume, which is something for the books.

00:53:17.000 It's a shame that the only thing that fucks up the Colombo one is like the emphasis.

00:53:21.000 Colonbo.

00:53:22.000 It just ruins it.

00:53:24.000 Your joke.

00:53:24.000 Colon?

00:53:25.000 Colonbo? 0.85

00:53:26.000 Colombo?

00:53:27.000 Sorry.

00:53:28.000 It's tough.

00:53:29.000 I don't.

00:53:32.000 I don't have to show you the cease and desist, right?

00:53:35.000 That's not, like, just take my word for it.

00:53:36.000 It's from a judge.

00:53:37.000 It says cease and desist.

00:53:38.000 You're not a nurse. 0.99

00:53:39.000 I don't have to show you the impersonators list.

00:53:43.000 We've already seen pictures of him passed out.

00:53:44.000 I could show you a bunch more pictures of shit on the floor.

00:53:47.000 But I think this is good.

00:53:49.000 His resume, which is all lies.

00:53:53.000 This is basically 100% lies.

00:53:56.000 I just sent it to you, Ryan.

00:53:58.000 He doesn't say that.

00:53:59.000 You're a liar.

00:54:03.000 It's so long, too.

00:54:06.000 I've heard that before.

00:54:10.000 Here we go.

00:54:12.000 Should we blank out that fucking full name?

00:54:15.000 Nah.

00:54:16.000 Just start with the...

00:54:17.000 Okay.

00:54:18.000 So Joseph Tonelli.

00:54:20.000 Wait.

00:54:21.000 Yeah, you just showed his phone numbers.

00:54:23.000 It's live.

00:54:24.000 The whole thing.

00:54:25.000 Extensive background in heavy construction, marine safety, environmental health and safety, blah, blah, blah.

00:54:29.000 He just throws marine in there, like with one comma.

00:54:33.000 Since my employment with NRG Home Solar Energy, the impact I'm having in less than a month of employment, I'm earning the trust and the respect of the employees, which is hard to do, especially being in the safety, the field.

00:54:45.000 When you have that on your side, the employees know you are looking out for their well-being and you're working with them, not against it.

00:54:52.000 In the past, the employees see the safety person drive up, comes to a stop because they're afraid they're going to be jammed up.

00:55:00.000 Spelled wrong.

00:55:01.000 Everything's spelled wrong.

00:55:02.000 However, when they see me, it's business as usual.

00:55:05.000 And if I see something that's not right, from there, I will put all my PPP, PPE and fault protection, et cetera.

00:55:11.000 And I'll assist them with their work as I talk with them with my concerns and the employees, blah, blah, blah.

00:55:16.000 If you go down, see if you can find the part in the document where he says he saved a cat when he's a fireman.

00:55:23.000 Just do, can you do a search?

00:55:25.000 Because it's like, it's really long.

00:55:27.000 Is that just the one page?

00:55:28.000 No, there's seven pages.

00:55:30.000 It's a seven-page resume.

00:55:34.000 Cat space.

00:55:38.000 Ah, there we go.

00:55:39.000 So zoom out now.

00:55:41.000 Oh, my God.

00:55:42.000 This is such fucking gold.

00:55:43.000 Zoom in a bit more.

00:55:46.000 Zoom out.

00:55:49.000 Oh, my God.

00:55:49.000 He calls it a feline rate scroll-up.

00:55:51.000 This is fucking gold.

00:55:54.000 I got signed by President Ronald Reagan, blah, blah, blah by President Obama.

00:55:57.000 Letter of his commendations from the village of Harrison, Rye, New York Mayor, public, blah, blah, blah.

00:56:02.000 Numerous life-saving awards.

00:56:05.000 From Barack Obama, Ronald Reagan, they're all thanking him for going above and beyond the Call of Duty.

00:56:10.000 Made the front page of the Daily Atom newspaper November 9th, 1991 for doing CPR on a cat.

00:56:16.000 Exclamation mark.

00:56:18.000 I was a Rye Fire Department volunteer captain with the Ponego Hook and Ladder Company at the time while searching a private house located in Ryan, New York that was on fire.

00:56:27.000 I love how New York has a period.

00:56:30.000 I searched the second floor and found an unresponsive feline.

00:56:36.000 I broke out a window on the second floor to let the heavy smoke out and brought the feline onto the roof.

00:56:41.000 With heavy smoke and fire around me, I removed my air pack so I could give the feline air.

00:56:47.000 While I was doing CPR, after about 10 minutes of CPR, the feline came to and was rushed to the Rye Harrison Veterinarian Hospital where the feline was in critical but stable condition.

00:56:59.000 After about a week or so in the hospital, the cat made a full recovery.

00:57:04.000 Wow.

00:57:06.000 The cat was just lying there with like tubes up his nose.

00:57:10.000 And Joe was like, hey there, little guy, you okay?

00:57:13.000 And the cat just sort of put his paw on Joe's hand.

00:57:17.000 It was like, and then he was like, roughing his head, you're going to make it, little buddy.

00:57:25.000 I know you is.

00:57:27.000 I know you is.

00:57:29.000 This is so Scary Perry.

00:57:33.000 Well, you can't.

00:57:34.000 This is my town.

00:57:34.000 The problem with Scary, like the thing about, what do they call it?

00:57:38.000 Dinner with schmucks kind of stuff is you don't want to fuck with people who are just like dumb or handicapped or something. 1.00

00:57:43.000 You're not choosing your targets.

00:57:44.000 But Scary Perry is a fucking asshole.

00:57:47.000 And Joe lied about being a Marine.

00:57:49.000 And he got a $100 tip on Memorial Day weekend.

00:57:52.000 So all bets are off.

00:57:55.000 All bets are off.

00:57:57.000 All right, let's get to the mail.

00:58:00.000 Shall we?

00:58:01.000 This is my town.

00:58:02.000 Chi town.

00:58:03.000 City of big hopes, big dreams.

00:58:04.000 He slaps the mic.

00:58:05.000 I saved the cat.

00:58:07.000 And then I took off my handbag.

00:58:08.000 Now we have to see that.

00:58:09.000 Give him CPR.

00:58:10.000 I had to quit the Perry Project because I was becoming addicted.

00:58:14.000 Some say I'm the best private dick there ever was.

00:58:18.000 But that was a long time ago.

00:58:21.000 The stone man has seen better days.

00:58:23.000 I'm out of shape.

00:58:25.000 I'm out of touch.

00:58:26.000 And I'm simply out of time.

00:58:29.000 I need a break and soon.

00:58:32.000 But there's trouble brewing up.

00:58:34.000 Stone can feel it.

00:58:37.000 Bobcat Goldwait.

00:58:38.000 But shit.

00:58:41.000 I'm sorry.

00:58:44.000 He lets it spit him.

00:58:45.000 I think you're adding too many colors to a painting.

00:58:47.000 Wait, go to the very beginning when he hits his mic.

00:59:09.000 My name is Stone, Stone Fury.

00:59:13.000 This is my town, Chi-Town, Chicago, Illinois.

00:59:18.000 A land of big hearts, big shoulders, and broken dreams.

00:59:28.000 I think they cut out where the mic pops.

00:59:30.000 Actually, speaking of which, we got a Scary Perry letter a long time ago, and, you know, it got buried.

00:59:37.000 From he?

00:59:40.000 Yeah.

00:59:41.000 This is from Michelle.

00:59:43.000 It's like June 8th.

00:59:45.000 The subject is just Scary Perry.

00:59:48.000 Greetings, chicken cream and brown funnel noodles.

00:59:51.000 I was in the chat during the live show last week.

00:59:53.000 Now, this is June 8th, so we're going back here.

00:59:56.000 Remember, you brought up Scary Perry.

00:59:58.000 Most of the people in the chat had no clue who he is, thought it was fake, etc.

01:00:01.000 Would it be a huge ask if maybe you would do a green screen presentation on Perry and Windy City Heat?

01:00:08.000 It's the best 30-year and still-going prank in history.

01:00:11.000 Not sharing it with the newer subscribers would solidify you as the biggest dick ever. 0.61

01:00:16.000 A squoze is worth a thousand squeezes.

01:00:20.000 Two squeezes don't make a squoze.

01:00:22.000 A squeeze in time saves a squoze.

01:00:24.000 The squoze is mightier than the squeeze.

01:00:26.000 I'm finished, Michelle.

01:00:30.000 Well, first of all, just go to YouTube and watch Windy City Heat, which was funded by Jimmy Kimmel back before he was woke, back when he was fun, back when everyone was fun.

01:00:41.000 Like, comedy was just for comedy fans back then in the early aughts, and no one, politics didn't go near it.

01:00:49.000 But that Squows thing is just gold.

01:00:56.000 Don Barris, the sort of mastermind of the prank, set up a meeting with an important director, which was fake.

01:01:00.000 And Perry's just a lazy asshole, so we missed it. 1.00

01:01:03.000 And he calls me, he goes, what the hell have you done?

01:01:05.000 You're going to knock me in the movie now.

01:01:06.000 You're never going to work in this town again.

01:01:08.000 How did you blow that meeting?

01:01:09.000 And he goes, I don't know.

01:01:10.000 I slept in.

01:01:11.000 And he goes, you got to make up a lie.

01:01:13.000 You got to say you were raped.

01:01:15.000 And so he goes back and forth on the different lines.

01:01:19.000 She's like, okay, hold on.

01:01:20.000 I'll try it.

01:01:21.000 And then he comes back and he goes, no, you got to make it bigger than that.

01:01:24.000 Say that he put a bottle up your ass and it broke.

01:01:28.000 Or it's possible Perry added that on his own.

01:01:30.000 I can't quite remember.

01:01:31.000 But this is the line that it makes me smile to this day.

01:01:34.000 And I heard it 20 years ago.

01:01:36.000 He goes, yeah, I don't want to get into it.

01:01:38.000 And the fake director's like, oh, my lord.

01:01:42.000 You're kidding me, Perry.

01:01:43.000 Are you all right?

01:01:44.000 He goes, yeah, I'm fine.

01:01:46.000 It was really, I had to go to the hospital because he put a, I don't want to talk about it, but he put a bottle in there.

01:01:51.000 And, you know, I didn't want to squeeze, but I squeeze.

01:01:55.000 And it broke.

01:02:00.000 Oh, my God.

01:02:01.000 Like the baseball referee I was talking to in between games at my kids' game a couple weeks ago, and he had a promising college baseball career.

01:02:09.000 And I think he was drunk because he wouldn't shut up.

01:02:11.000 He was like, yeah, that was back then.

01:02:13.000 I mean, I'm one of these guys.

01:02:15.000 I don't think you should be a snob out there.

01:02:17.000 I don't like good eye.

01:02:18.000 I like just hit there.

01:02:19.000 And you know, I've made mistakes.

01:02:20.000 There's times when I swang when I didn't want to swing.

01:02:23.000 And I was like, holy shit, you just did the swing version of Squoze.

01:02:27.000 I swang.

01:02:30.000 Good lord.

01:02:31.000 How many times have I got to tell to stop touching that stupid earpiece?

01:02:34.000 For the love of God, stop touching your earpiece.

01:02:38.000 Oh, he's lactose intolerant.

01:02:40.000 Put it back in.

01:02:41.000 I don't want to lose that.

01:02:42.000 I would rather that fall out than you keep touching it every two seconds.

01:02:46.000 Dietrich.

01:02:50.000 Okay, that's enough of it.

01:02:51.000 New Jeffy.

01:02:53.000 I can't figure out a fucking earpiece.

01:02:55.000 There's another scary parry here.

01:02:57.000 Hey, Gav, I know you're a big fan of the Scare Master and love your work.

01:02:59.000 I was wondering if you've seen any of his streaming stuff from Twitch.

01:03:02.000 Apparently, he streams for hours with fans sending him raw fish, firewood, and fast food.

01:03:08.000 He doesn't like tipping him to do stupid shit, but recently I've stumbled upon some convenient highlight compilations on YouTube.

01:03:15.000 Non-stop laughs.

01:03:17.000 Yeah.

01:03:17.000 We saw the fire in the microwave one.

01:03:20.000 That was good.

01:03:20.000 Put a piece of bread in the microwave for 10 minutes.

01:03:22.000 Hey, Gavin, as a fellow fan of the Perry Project, check out this fake news clip they showed to Perry on him being gay.

01:03:29.000 Oh, that's ancient news.

01:03:31.000 You've all seen that, right?

01:03:35.000 Turn it up.

01:03:39.000 No one's defending this idiot.

01:03:41.000 Look, I'm there.

01:03:44.000 Kill me.

01:03:46.000 That is, is Perry gay or lesbian?

01:03:50.000 You know, that's great.

01:03:54.000 That's his life.

01:03:54.000 I don't have a problem with seeing him kiss his boyfriend on television.

01:03:57.000 That's who he is.

01:04:04.000 Well, you know, again, I'm focusing on the fact that he's not the mob.

01:04:10.000 The PC mob is running the economy.

01:04:14.000 We gotta take a break for you guys one more second.

01:04:16.000 You don't want to miss this.

01:04:19.000 When we get back to the reaction, we're gonna be the most fucking videos of the day. 0.75

01:04:23.000 He's talking to me.

01:04:32.000 That's perfect because me being on that panel totally gives it credibility.

01:04:37.000 Oh, that's fucking great.

01:04:38.000 So Hannity was in on that.

01:04:40.000 That wasn't edited?

01:04:45.000 Because he said Perry.

01:04:47.000 And he said gay.

01:04:53.000 Okay, there's a chance two things happened.

01:04:55.000 They edited that footage to sound like he said that, or took it out of context, or He liked Jimmy Kim you and everybody else.

01:05:04.000 No, no, Hannity is not a super funny dude who's happy to get involved in the oldest prank in history that was just really good editing.

01:05:13.000 And they were talking about Rick Perry.

01:05:15.000 Oh.

01:05:16.000 Right?

01:05:17.000 Okay.

01:05:18.000 I don't know if Rick Perry was rumored to be gay, was he?

01:05:22.000 Rick Perry gay.

01:05:24.000 Yep, Rick Perry gay rumors.

01:05:25.000 So that's all they need to.

01:05:26.000 Anyway.

01:05:27.000 Hello.

01:05:28.000 I've recently become obsessed with Scary Perry, and I've been watching his Twitch stream like it's my last day on earth.

01:05:32.000 Fuck my heels. 0.95

01:05:33.000 I like your new sunglasses.

01:05:34.000 And then they've got a clip there.

01:05:36.000 I guess from his...

01:05:39.000 I'm not a fag. 0.74

01:05:41.000 I'm homophobic.

01:05:45.000 Okay, that's ancient.

01:05:48.000 All right, so now, like, that's how much fucking mail we have to get through.

01:05:52.000 I just put in any search, and there's 9 million things.

01:05:56.000 Like, let's put in a thing.

01:06:01.000 How about fucking... 0.71

01:06:03.000 Animals.

01:06:04.000 You want to do edibles?

01:06:05.000 Dogs?

01:06:06.000 Like, people talking about their dogs, and they hate how you talk about dogs.

01:06:10.000 No, I put in Glasgow.

01:06:12.000 Let me put in Glasgow.

01:06:14.000 Fee Glasgow, by the way.

01:06:15.000 I ate Fee Glasgow.

01:06:18.000 I've been having trouble viewing GOML episodes since the 10th of June live show.

01:06:23.000 As in, I can't fucking get them.

01:06:25.000 And now I can't even access earlier shows.

01:06:28.000 I downloaded a VPN assuming that my network had blocked the videos, but still having no luck.

01:06:34.000 It's worth mentioning that I'm using a brand new Samsung phone that could have some sort of blocker on it or something.

01:06:41.000 Alright there, Tony.

01:06:43.000 Appreciate you getting us the updates.

01:06:45.000 I'm going to send this to the tech guy.

01:06:48.000 And fucking he's going to see what he can do and all.

01:06:54.000 Right.

01:06:55.000 You're right, big man.

01:06:57.000 You're right, pal.

01:06:59.000 Alright, let's scooch down here. 0.99

01:07:01.000 I've been through all these now, Ryan.

01:07:02.000 What's going on?

01:07:03.000 Is it overheating again?

01:07:04.000 Just make it shut it down.

01:07:06.000 Fucking hell.

01:07:08.000 Alright, here's one.

01:07:14.000 Why was your wife's nickname Blobs? 1.00

01:07:16.000 That doesn't sound very attractive.

01:07:18.000 Just always wondered that after reading your book.

01:07:20.000 I guess I should have mentioned it in the book.

01:07:23.000 I said to her once, what's your idea, heaven?

01:07:25.000 Like, what was your ideal day?

01:07:27.000 Like, if you could do anything, you know, time travel or fucking fight a lion, like, what'd you like to do?

01:07:33.000 And she said to me, I'd like to just sit in bed all day surrounded by magazines.

01:07:38.000 This is when we met back in 2001 and all right.

01:07:41.000 So magazines were more about, you didn't have an iPad and all.

01:07:46.000 And I said, that's sucking typical of a woman, you know. 1.00

01:07:50.000 You're all so fucking lazy there.

01:07:52.000 You're just a bunch of blobs. 1.00

01:07:54.000 You're just a blob.

01:07:56.000 Oh.

01:07:57.000 I guess it's a bit insulting.

01:07:58.000 But then I started calling her blobs after that. 0.98

01:08:01.000 And now it's fucking tattooed on my bloody chest there.

01:08:05.000 Wait, everything's reversed, so it's this?

01:08:07.000 Yeah, blobs. 0.92

01:08:10.000 All right.

01:08:13.000 Could we do a bit where I get every one of your tattoos?

01:08:16.000 That's a great idea.

01:08:17.000 That's hilarious, isn't it?

01:08:18.000 Here's one.

01:08:19.000 Furry eats shit.

01:08:25.000 God bless you.

01:08:26.000 And it's a bunch of posts about a guy named Brown Nose Pup, who is allegedly a shit eater.

01:08:31.000 Right.

01:08:34.000 And he says, if this is true, he's a mentally ill guy who likes to eat shit and stuff.

01:08:41.000 And he's a furry, too.

01:08:43.000 And he says, they can put me in a hospital and make me take...

01:08:47.000 What's taking you so fucking long you eat it?

01:08:50.000 Furry eats shit.

01:08:52.000 Furry eats shit.

01:08:54.000 Don't do an accent if you can't even do your fucking job. 1.00

01:08:59.000 So my problem with this is how do I know this is real?

01:09:03.000 You know.

01:09:05.000 Things have been rough lately.

01:09:07.000 I'm going to be okay, but it might take a while.

01:09:08.000 I hope you're all doing well and staying messy.

01:09:10.000 Unfortunately, Brown Nose Pup, otherwise known as Eric, has died due to overconsumption of feces and lack of nutrients due to the consumption of feces and died of the shock of eating feces.

01:09:21.000 He talks about eating poop quite a bit there.

01:09:23.000 Like, I'm sorry, but I know this is no like Tucker Carlson tonight, but I can't he be treating these stories as real when they're just silly things and with no news.

01:09:36.000 Like when you look up whatever his name was, Furry Brown Nose, and the news, nothing comes up.

01:09:42.000 So sorry.

01:09:43.000 I need a real news story to make it real.

01:09:46.000 White comedians in all black face, white comedian in all black audience, listen to them cackling insanely loud, says a guy.

01:09:56.000 So I've been through all these, Ryan, particularly for this show when we found out we couldn't do calls.

01:10:01.000 So you're going to have to do a lot of hopping and be on the ball.

01:10:04.000 Here are you, buddy.

01:10:06.000 You brought nuggets to the show.

01:10:08.000 That's a bold move.

01:10:10.000 Like that.

01:10:11.000 See some good Tahir man thigh up front. 0.99

01:10:14.000 Nice.

01:10:16.000 You're confident, man.

01:10:18.000 Because you wear tight clothes and you're big, you know?

01:10:32.000 Tahir's clothes look like the net on a ham.

01:10:42.000 You can tell this guy's going to love black clubs.

01:10:46.000 You know who else is like this?

01:10:47.000 Josh Denny.

01:10:47.000 Josh Denny cut his chops at black clubs.

01:10:51.000 I was supposed to be on earlier in the show, but they have to wait till the sun goes down so that I don't get washed out on camera.

01:11:00.000 So we need a little contrast.

01:11:03.000 You may not remember me, but about a half an hour ago, Jonathan, a legend, didn't know I was on the show.

01:11:11.000 I was the white guy in the crowd that he referred to.

01:11:13.000 You know what I mean, white guy?

01:11:22.000 We met 15 minutes before that.

01:11:25.000 And I know you didn't confuse me with anyone else here.

01:11:31.000 Wow.

01:11:32.000 Quality.

01:11:34.000 And then you gave me permission to say the N-word, which you got to have context for that, you know?

01:11:42.000 My last name is Nickerson.

01:11:46.000 I've always had a delicate relationship with that word.

01:11:51.000 You find me a more important K in history.

01:11:58.000 You got to land that.

01:12:00.000 Okay, Davin Comp troller.

01:12:04.000 Okay, this is becoming one of my top pet peeves.

01:12:07.000 It is surpassing my biggest pet peeve, which is people putting the dollar sign after the number.

01:12:13.000 This is becoming relatively common, and I'm freaking out.

01:12:16.000 I see it as like a sign of the apocalypse, and I'm not exaggerating.

01:12:20.000 If you don't even know, I've even had fucking idiots, and I got to say, proud boys do this a lot, go, well, no, it is on the other side.

01:12:28.000 Look, $16, dollars a second.

01:12:33.000 I don't care how you fucking say it.

01:12:36.000 That's not how rules are born.

01:12:38.000 You may have an argument for why you want to do it wrong.

01:12:41.000 It's still wrong.

01:12:43.000 So ever since I've explained to people that CompTroller is pronounced controller, I've had people going, no, it's not, including controllers.

01:12:55.000 Hey, Gavin, you've mentioned this.

01:12:57.000 You've mentioned this a few times.

01:12:58.000 I recently made an issue about CompTroller.

01:13:00.000 Now, I'm mispronouncing this so you can see that there's different spellings here.

01:13:06.000 You made an issue about Comptroller versus Controller.

01:13:09.000 Basically, they are the same position, but Comptroller generally works in public and non-profit sector, while controller is everything else.

01:13:16.000 So the guy who was running for Comptroller was correct with his title since it was a governmental position.

01:13:22.000 I've been a controller for many companies for several years, so your complaining has been uniquely annoying to me.

01:13:29.000 Anyway, I've included some references below so you won't think I'm another ignorant millennial who makes stuff up in their heads.

01:13:35.000 Cough, Ryan.

01:13:36.000 I like you more than a friend.

01:13:38.000 So I don't know.

01:13:38.000 I guess my response doesn't show up on your shit, right?

01:13:42.000 Oh, it does?

01:13:44.000 Comptroller.

01:13:46.000 How to pronounce Comptroller noun in American English?

01:13:50.000 Let's click on the American English.

01:13:52.000 Controller.

01:13:54.000 You don't say.

01:13:55.000 Controller.

01:13:57.000 I sent him two examples of that.

01:13:58.000 Do you have the other one there, just in case?

01:14:01.000 Controller.

01:14:03.000 Controller.

01:14:06.000 This guy's a controller, and he's telling me how to pronounce his own fucking job.

01:14:12.000 That's like Ryan telling you how to pronounce faggot. 1.00

01:14:16.000 Wait.

01:14:17.000 Thank you.

01:14:20.000 So now we're all the way down to car fight.

01:14:22.000 I'm surpassing like a hundred shitty emails to bring you here.

01:14:25.000 Car fight.

01:14:26.000 Hey, Ansem, an Asian laugh track. 1.00

01:14:28.000 Tis the season.

01:14:29.000 It's time for some new car fights.

01:14:30.000 Do you prefer summer or winter car fights?

01:14:33.000 Great question.

01:14:34.000 In the winter, the ice usually gets more cars involved once everything gets moving, but I prefer summer because the conditions are more suitable to get traction for better hits.

01:14:42.000 And there's usually people outside waiting to add that extra level of danger of a person getting yeeted.

01:14:48.000 Car wrestling is definitely black privilege. 0.98

01:14:50.000 If it were white people doing this, there would be legislation to ban cars tomorrow. 1.00

01:14:53.000 Yes, I'm with you on summer cars.

01:14:55.000 Wow.

01:14:56.000 Excuse me.

01:15:01.000 What's with the screaming?

01:15:02.000 I don't know.

01:15:03.000 Did a baby die?

01:15:07.000 Now, here's what's dangerous about this.

01:15:09.000 Stop.

01:15:11.000 What if the car rolls now?

01:15:13.000 Oh, wow.

01:15:15.000 And you're still there and it rolls a little extra and snaps your back.

01:15:18.000 True that, dog.

01:15:22.000 But let's see the whole thing.

01:15:23.000 You started it too soon with that really annoying burp.

01:15:27.000 Why are you drinking?

01:15:28.000 Stop, stop, stop.

01:15:29.000 Why are you drinking carbonated beverages on air?

01:15:32.000 Thirsty.

01:15:33.000 What kind of fucking moron does a show with a microphone in his face and drinks carbonated beverages?

01:15:39.000 You do that.

01:15:40.000 Budweiser.

01:15:45.000 Besides that.

01:15:47.000 On the green screen, it's very present.

01:15:50.000 I don't know why, but more on the green screen, you'll be like, and that's why the things happen.

01:15:54.000 You're not allowed to do it, only me.

01:15:57.000 Yeah, and so she eventually gets out. 1.00

01:16:02.000 Oh, shit.

01:16:04.000 These are people who don't have enough money for Censore.tv, yet they're just riding off their car, which is probably only worth like three grand.

01:16:12.000 See, this goes back to what I was saying on Tuesday about that stray tire.

01:16:17.000 You got to watch it with touching things with a tire because it ramps you up.

01:16:21.000 Like, I was in a car accident with David Cross once, and he hit another car sideways, and his car, their tire popped them up in the sky, and their back wheel hit my back window.

01:16:34.000 I was a passenger in the back.

01:16:35.000 And their back wheel hit our window and shattered it.

01:16:38.000 Like, it pops you up.

01:16:40.000 Then he just goes home.

01:16:45.000 Next, we're going way, way down to...

01:16:47.000 Oh, there's another one there.

01:16:48.000 Oh, no.

01:16:48.000 There is?

01:16:49.000 He just linked it twice.

01:16:50.000 Can't get mad at anyone.

01:16:51.000 Oh, wait.

01:16:52.000 No, here's the second angle.

01:16:53.000 Sorry.

01:16:53.000 Oh, cool.

01:16:55.000 He ran before.

01:16:59.000 This is how it started.

01:17:04.000 Is that even the enemy's car?

01:17:07.000 Yeah, good point.

01:17:10.000 Wait, that's it?

01:17:11.000 Yep.

01:17:14.000 Can't get mad anymore, period.

01:17:16.000 I can only laugh.

01:17:17.000 Sup, G-Dog and Anime Fag. 0.99

01:17:19.000 Before articles like this would get my blood boiling.

01:17:20.000 Now I can only laugh at the new quote-unquote racism and use it to red pill friends and family. 0.78

01:17:26.000 I think showing articles like this to people left of center, asking them if they think this is serious in any way, might help change a few minds.

01:17:32.000 White supremacy colors everything. 0.86

01:17:34.000 Tattoo artists of color battle narrative that ideal skin for tattoos is white.

01:17:40.000 Yeah, obviously ideal skin for tattoos is not white, which is why when people are drawing or writing letters, they use dark brown paper.

01:17:48.000 Correct.

01:17:49.000 That's why white paper is almost impossible to find.

01:17:53.000 Nobody draws on white paper.

01:17:55.000 And you'll notice grocery stores are always out of dark brown paper bags because artists Take them to draw on them.

01:18:01.000 You can see things on dark brown much better than on white.

01:18:05.000 I don't know.

01:18:06.000 Contrast is racist now?

01:18:08.000 Okay.

01:18:11.000 Also, a bonus article.

01:18:12.000 I can't read about restaurants in the Seattle area without coming across articles like this.

01:18:15.000 Last December, I was trying to find a place to eat downtown and thought I could only rely on a website dedicated to helping find something.

01:18:21.000 But instead, the front page was this.

01:18:24.000 Christina Glinoga is reimagining butchery, leaving white male toxicity behind.

01:18:30.000 Oi, Vei.

01:18:34.000 Big Ed's bigger picture.

01:18:36.000 How did you miss this glaring issue with Big Ed and his girlfriend?

01:18:38.000 Yes, he's manipulative and full of shit, but so is she.

01:18:42.000 He's talking about the new girl, Liz.

01:18:44.000 You kept asking, what's in it for her?

01:18:46.000 Money, money, and money.

01:18:47.000 Think about what he says.

01:18:48.000 I wanted to give her the things she never had.

01:18:50.000 Don't be blinded by your belief in classic misogyny.

01:18:54.000 This dude is smart, and he is around good-looking girls all day.

01:18:58.000 He wants young, good-looking pussy. 1.00

01:18:59.000 And there are plenty of girls out there willing to give it up for the right style of living and allowance. 1.00

01:19:04.000 He doesn't have any fucking money.

01:19:05.000 Have you seen his car?

01:19:06.000 Have you seen his house?

01:19:08.000 And secondly, I've read this letter already.

01:19:13.000 What are you looking up?

01:19:14.000 Oh.

01:19:15.000 This is major tea.

01:19:16.000 Two days ago, she came out saying she drops tea on him.

01:19:20.000 I don't know.

01:19:20.000 Just B-roll.

01:19:21.000 She drops tea? 1.00

01:19:22.000 Yeah.

01:19:22.000 What's tea?

01:19:23.000 Tea is like gossip.

01:19:25.000 Well, what's the gossip?

01:19:26.000 Girl, he asked.

01:19:29.000 Why does that not surprise me?

01:19:31.000 He went through every single female.

01:19:33.000 Was that height ratio true?

01:19:35.000 Did you see that?

01:19:36.000 By every single girl.

01:19:37.000 Not Liz Wright out of Snow White.

01:19:39.000 He asked.

01:19:40.000 She's got to be on a ledge. 0.99

01:19:42.000 Why does that not surprise me?

01:19:43.000 Stop.

01:19:43.000 No, he's sitting down at a table.

01:19:45.000 Oh, thank God.

01:19:46.000 Yes.

01:19:47.000 Wow.

01:19:48.000 He went through every single female at my job asking if they would date with him on the show.

01:19:55.000 And they all said no.

01:19:57.000 So then he asked Liz as his very last resort, and she actually initially said no.

01:20:03.000 So last resort, me, he asked me, and for two months, I also said no.

01:20:10.000 Then she realized that he preys on the needy and those that desire to become famous, and she preys on dudes with cash.

01:20:16.000 When he fails to find the girl that fits the girlfriend position, he gets quote-unquote sugar babies, which are like longer-term prostitutes.

01:20:21.000 Whether it's a sugar baby or a young girl in the girlfriend posit, it's the same bullshit. 0.69

01:20:26.000 She's sad she has to go back to working at Applebee's 38 hours a week.

01:20:29.000 Everybody seems to feel bad for her, but the way I see it, they're more alike than most want to admit.

01:20:34.000 She doesn't like him.

01:20:35.000 She didn't love him.

01:20:36.000 She liked what he can do for her.

01:20:38.000 And that is why that bullfrog was boyfriend material.

01:20:40.000 If he was broke, she never, and I mean never, would have given him the time of day.

01:20:44.000 He is broke.

01:20:47.000 Welcome to the real world, boys, where toads and nerds can steal your girl and dick her down on the beach in Cabo because he bought her an escalade.

01:20:53.000 He's not buying anyone an escalade.

01:20:55.000 He drives around in like a little novelty mini.

01:20:58.000 Also, I don't know what it is about her, but I found her extremely attractive, like that right kind of imperfect perfect. 0.96

01:21:04.000 Yes, thank you for concluding with that because she's a five or when she gets done up like a seven, but the sex appeal is through the roof. 1.00

01:21:14.000 I cannot figure it out.

01:21:17.000 It's like Katy Perry.

01:21:19.000 Stunning.

01:21:20.000 An 8.8.

01:21:22.000 Nothing happening here.

01:21:27.000 Could you have a worse hairdo for when your head is a cone?

01:21:32.000 Like, shouldn't you be trying to counteract the cone?

01:21:36.000 And why don't you have a big beard?

01:21:38.000 I don't know.

01:21:41.000 This is a female with the sprinkles. 1.00

01:21:44.000 I totally enjoy your show and love you.

01:21:46.000 I'm a 60-year-old, retired USAF mom, raised three boys.

01:21:50.000 I love your advice for young men to get married and raise kids.

01:21:52.000 Having an intact family will make any boy into a man.

01:21:56.000 Thank you, my dear.

01:21:57.000 I couldn't agree more.

01:21:58.000 Although I could do without some of your sexually explicit jokes and stop picking on Ryan, I cannot help either of those things.

01:22:06.000 I think my Scottish background is like every time I go into Scotland, it's raunchville.

01:22:12.000 And everyone's doing like Hitler jokes and racist jokes and fucking inappropriate jokes.

01:22:17.000 I've watched this clip.

01:22:18.000 I disagree with you, but go ahead.

01:22:21.000 Let me ask you about foreign bodies.

01:22:23.000 You just filmed that in Malaysia.

01:22:25.000 Were you filming in Malaysia?

01:22:26.000 Yeah, so this is Tom Basdin, who's a wonderful stand-up and writer as well.

01:22:29.000 He wrote Plebs.

01:22:31.000 He's done a new show for E4 here, and then I think it's TNT in the States.

01:22:35.000 And it's all about a group of Gaffier students.

01:22:37.000 So I was like a sort of weirdo they came across in their trip.

01:22:41.000 No, we're not even watching it.

01:22:42.000 She goes on and says that she can't handle the heat because she's Irish and she was always sweaty. 1.00

01:22:46.000 Sorry, no sprinkles.

01:22:47.000 Once again, like, you want to know who has...

01:22:50.000 Let me just tell you my standard for sprinkles.

01:22:52.000 You know what we do in the shadows?

01:22:59.000 The cast for that includes that Greek woman whose name is The Bald Eagle. 0.93

01:23:08.000 Natasia Demetrio.

01:23:11.000 D-E-M-E-T-R-I-O-U. 1.00

01:23:14.000 She's the most beautiful woman in the world, but she's also the queen of sprinkles. 0.99

01:23:20.000 And if you just put her name into videos and look at her like anywhere, even when she's not doing jokes, you're just like, you are just so easy to make me laugh.

01:23:35.000 That's not very good grammar, is it?

01:23:42.000 Okay, that's just on a game show.

01:23:46.000 Look at her, like, she has her own channel with sketches and stuff.

01:23:49.000 Look up Sexy American Girls People Time. 1.00

01:23:56.000 This is her doing, her and her friend pretending to be Russians who love America but have never been. 0.96

01:24:18.000 My pussy is a petropump, feeling greasy baby oil. 0.97

01:24:21.000 Grown-up oil, put it on my body, worth so much money.

01:24:25.000 Please, first, can we get to know the sweet babies behind the music? 0.98

01:24:28.000 Please.

01:24:29.000 Of course you can, as you are so nicely, you fucking cheeky devil.

01:24:32.000 My name is.

01:24:33.000 You fucking cheeky devil.

01:24:35.000 Anyway, she's great and she's worth. 0.98

01:24:36.000 We've talked about her before, though.

01:24:38.000 She's my...

01:24:39.000 I can't wait for my wife to die in a plane crash so I can start courting her. 1.00

01:24:42.000 How's it going, Gavin and Ryan.

01:24:43.000 I love the show and the way you're fair to every race when they act stupid. 0.96

01:24:47.000 Here's a short TikTok of a large woman wearing a nightgown standing backward on the plane due to a Brazilian butt lift. 1.00

01:24:55.000 I'd be livid if I had the next seat.

01:24:57.000 This is called air travel nonsense.

01:25:01.000 And I just don't get.

01:25:05.000 I heard you can't sit on your ass for six months after you get a butt lift. 1.00

01:25:10.000 Air travel nonsense?

01:25:11.000 Not seen or let's see.

01:25:14.000 One word, air travel.

01:25:19.000 Got it.

01:25:23.000 Open the doshmo. 0.97

01:25:25.000 Waiting, waiting, killing the show.

01:25:27.000 This is a Joe Biden length pause.

01:25:30.000 What are you doing there?

01:25:47.000 What?

01:25:52.000 You know, my wife once convinced my kids that I got a Brazilian butt lift. 0.70

01:25:56.000 Wow.

01:25:57.000 It was about two years ago.

01:25:59.000 So my eldest girl would be 12 and then 10 and then 6.

01:26:05.000 And they go, where's, I was in LA.

01:26:06.000 I can't remember where.

01:26:07.000 It was like a four-day business trip.

01:26:09.000 And they go, where's dad?

01:26:12.000 I think it's stupid, but he's getting a Brazilian butt lift. 1.00

01:26:15.000 What?

01:26:16.000 Yeah, he says he needs it.

01:26:17.000 I don't know.

01:26:18.000 He says it's for work.

01:26:19.000 He should get one.

01:26:21.000 I don't know.

01:26:22.000 So he'll be back, and he's going to probably be in bed for a few days recovering after he comes back.

01:26:26.000 And they're like, wow.

01:26:28.000 And I'm like, don't blobs. 1.00

01:26:30.000 Don't fucking do that.

01:26:31.000 What if they tell their friends?

01:26:33.000 Now it's harder for me to erase the rumor than for you to create it in the first place.

01:26:38.000 Next thing you know, all the local dads think I got a butt lift.

01:26:46.000 It does look better, I guess.

01:26:48.000 I don't know why you grew dark hairs all over your butt.

01:26:52.000 What the fuck is that?

01:26:53.000 Is that a man getting it? 0.69

01:26:56.000 Do certain races of women have black fuzz all over their butt cheeks? 1.00

01:27:01.000 Maybe.

01:27:02.000 I don't approve.

01:27:03.000 I was not asked about that.

01:27:05.000 This is Smoke Show Song Recommendation.

01:27:08.000 Dear Gavin and Ryan, check out this band's lead singer.

01:27:10.000 What rating do you give her? 0.98

01:27:11.000 Probably an 8.7.

01:27:12.000 Music's not amazing, but she is.

01:27:15.000 Okay.

01:27:16.000 So we have a look here.

01:27:19.000 Ryan will probably be catching up within the hour.

01:27:25.000 Sedona.

01:27:32.000 Very interesting look, isn't it?

01:27:35.000 She's a bigger girl.

01:27:42.000 That's the kind of girl you don't want to fuck in July, but you'd love to fuck in February. 1.00

01:27:48.000 A lot of gal. 0.99

01:27:50.000 No one thinks you're a pussy when you're dating her, right? 1.00

01:27:54.000 Like when you're with a small Asian girl, you're super pretty. 1.00

01:27:57.000 People go, all right, I mean, it's nice that you get to fuck a pretty girl, but no one's impressed and they think you're weak. 0.99

01:28:03.000 But the opposite is true of her.

01:28:11.000 So what would I give her?

01:28:13.000 That's tricky.

01:28:15.000 Let's hear your rating, Ryan.

01:28:20.000 High sevens, low eights.

01:28:23.000 Oh.

01:28:24.000 Okay, I got nervous when you said a S sound.

01:28:26.000 I thought you were going to go to sixes.

01:28:27.000 No, that's not realistic.

01:28:29.000 I'd say 7.2.

01:28:32.000 We got a.

Get Off My Lawn - Gavin McInnes - June 18, 2021

GOML LIVE #103: THE END?

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