Get Off My Lawn - Gavin McInnes - October 04, 2019


GOML LIVE #15 | TRUMP DERANGEMENT SYNDROME

Topics
Spence fight outfit bet cockfight in Venezuela Trump Derangement Syndrome fart videos Trump derangement syndrome
Hosted by
Gavin McInnes
Mentioned
Donald Trump Ryan Sean Porter Vest Huge Nickelback Bill Maher Powertie Perry Gina Belafonte Joker Joey Johnny Apple CBD Gil McGowan Gold Vest Braveheart Power-Ty Glasgow Boxer Zack William Randolph Hearst III William Randolph Hearst and 64 more
S02E67 - KNOW YOUR MEME S02E68 - DOOMED UTOPIA

Episode Stats


Length

57 minutes

Words per minute

158.59

Word count

9,116

Sentence count

1,182

Harmful content

Misogyny

47

sentences flagged

Toxicity

269

sentences flagged

Hate speech

36

sentences flagged


Summary

Summaries generated with gmurro/bart-large-finetuned-filtered-spotify-podcast-summ .

Gavin McInnes is back in Vladivostok, and Ryan and Soph are here to talk about music and sex. They talk about a new song that s been out for a while, and it s a good one. Also, Ann Coulter and Gina Belafonte are here, and they talk about sex. And we talk about why men are too scared to go near a woman s vagina anymore. Get Off My Lawn is a podcast by FreeSpeech.tv. Hosted by and . Produced in Los Angeles, CA and New York City, NY. If you like what you hear here, please HIT SUBSCRIBE on Apple Podcasts! Subscribe, Like, and Share to get notified when we deconstruct the latest viral videos and other cool shit you like! Logo by Courtney DeKorte. Theme by Mavus White. Music by PSOVOD and tyops. We do not own the rights to either of these songs or any of the music used in this episode. All credit goes to original artists and labels. Thank you for listening and supporting this episode of GET OFF MY PLEDGE with any amount you can manage to afford it on your own sound quality and sound quality, we do our best to make sure it's as good as possible. Please rate, review, review and subscribe to the show, and spread the word out there about what you're listening to this podcast. It helps us out there! Get off my Lawn! -Gavin.tv/GetOffMyLawn/GetoffMyLoud/Gavin's Lawn/Get off My Lawn/Gemma's Lawn/Soph's Lullaby/Geeezer/Gerry's Looeeeeeee - Thank you, Ryan and Joe Biggs/Ann Coulter/Joe Biggs & Ann Coulter/Candace Owens/Cadynne/Candy Owens/Kristen Ochs, etc., etc. etc. Thank you so much, and thanks for listening to us, and we really appreciate it. - Thanks for listening, bye bye! Love ya'll, bye, bye! xoxo, bye. XOXOoo, bye - - Joe, Caitlyn & Cheyenne & Co, Caitie & Joe, - Ollie, Gorms, JUICY!

Transcript

Transcripts from "Get Off My Lawn - Gavin McInnes" are sourced from the Knowledge Fight Interactive Search Tool. Explore them interactively here.
Misogyny classifications generated with MilaNLProc/bert-base-uncased-ear-misogyny .
Toxicity classifications generated with s-nlp/roberta_toxicity_classifier .
Hate speech classifications generated with facebook/roberta-hate-speech-dynabench-r4-target .
Topics generated with Qwen2.5-3B-Instruct.
Hosts, guests, and mentioned names generated with spaCy (en_core_web_sm), reconciled against Wikidata.
00:00:00.000 Hey guys, thanks for fucking with this video. 0.97
00:00:01.000 Please go to FreeSpeech.tv and subscribe. 0.97
00:00:04.000 It's $10 a month or $100 for a year, so that's two months free. 0.96
00:00:07.000 And as far as the YouTube shit goes, then just smash the subscribe. 0.97
00:00:25.000 Live from New York, it's Get Off My Lawn with Gavin McInnes! 0.99
00:00:40.000 That was a record for how quickly you shut that off.
00:00:43.000 Yeah, because it's solid.
00:00:44.000 You didn't let it drop.
00:00:46.000 You know what that sounds like?
00:00:48.000 What?
00:00:49.000 It sounds like a Russian news show.
00:00:55.000 And welcome back to Vladivostok, the only English-speaking Russian news channel in all of Shabringovets.
00:01:03.000 We are here, our budget is not fantastic, I'm not going to lie to you.
00:01:08.000 The guy who makes our music also is co-host of show, also does lighting and everything.
00:01:14.000 Uh, his name, he plugs his show whenever he can.
00:01:17.000 So he can get up to... How many subscribers you have on YouTube?
00:01:22.000 How many subscribers?
00:01:23.000 Say English, it's an English speaking show.
00:01:25.000 Uh, yes.
00:01:26.000 Uh, 3.69k.
00:01:30.000 3.69k.
00:01:31.000 That's metric.
00:01:32.000 Metric numbers he gives about his... This is a song you make, Ryan?
00:01:37.000 Yeah.
00:01:38.000 You didn't hear it drop.
00:01:41.000 Let's hear it drop, in air quotes.
00:01:43.000 Here it comes.
00:01:47.000 Ooh, spooky.
00:01:49.000 Yeah.
00:01:50.000 Ooh, spooky.
00:01:53.000 That slaps, as the kids say.
00:01:56.000 Oh, yeah.
00:01:56.000 Drop the beat.
00:01:57.000 Oh.
00:01:58.000 Boop.
00:02:03.000 Boop, boop. 1.00
00:02:04.000 Yeah, you caught that.
00:02:05.000 All right.
00:02:07.000 Has it dropped yet?
00:02:08.000 Is it dark in here?
00:02:09.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:02:10.000 And then it goes back to the chorus.
00:02:15.000 You are a European. 0.89
00:02:19.000 You're a European bobe. 0.98
00:02:21.000 Hey, you guys wanna go down to the disco?
00:02:24.000 We're having a total outside rave party!
00:02:27.000 Boom.
00:02:27.000 Even though it's 2019, we're still totally raving, you guys!
00:02:31.000 Yeah.
00:02:32.000 Why are you into rave- Do you go to Burning Man?
00:02:34.000 No.
00:02:34.000 Do you walk around with little fur boots?
00:02:36.000 No, it's just because- And a little Jesus Christ loincloth, and some fucking giant bullhorns on your head? 0.99
00:02:41.000 Clearly you're on a roll, so I'm not gonna- I'm not gonna infest this with truth. 0.99
00:02:45.000 Clearly you're on a roll, if you will.
00:02:48.000 The lighting's a little dim.
00:02:49.000 That's my bad. 1.00
00:02:51.000 We'll fix it and turn off the stupid AC. 0.99
00:02:55.000 Hello, folks. 1.00
00:02:55.000 Welcome back to Get Off My Lawn. 1.00
00:02:58.000 It's a very special episode we have every Thursday.
00:03:01.000 We go free.
00:03:02.000 We're going to go free for the first, I don't know, 45 minutes or so, right before we take calls.
00:03:05.000 I'm going to catch you.
00:03:07.000 Cut you off.
00:03:09.000 And only people behind the paywall can watch the full show. 0.99
00:03:13.000 You can watch the full show every fucking day if you subscribe to freespeech.tv. 0.77
00:03:19.000 10 bucks a month. 0.95
00:03:21.000 And if you use the promo code NOTHINGATALL you can get it for $100 a year.
00:03:26.000 And it's endless content.
00:03:27.000 It's not just me.
00:03:28.000 We got Soph here.
00:03:30.000 We got Joe Biggs.
00:03:31.000 We also have, uh, twice a month, we have, um, a special episode where we bring in a massive guest, like say, Cornel West and Candace Owens.
00:03:42.000 And then we have Milo's show that I think we're going to move up to once a week.
00:03:46.000 Although he ain't cheap.
00:03:48.000 Those fancy lads from London, England tend to have a price that matches.
00:03:55.000 Ezra Levant.
00:03:56.000 There's all the different ones we've had.
00:03:57.000 Roger Stone and Mark Lamont Hill and Michael Eric Dyson and Michelle Malkin.
00:04:02.000 That was a good one.
00:04:03.000 Gina Belafonte and Ann Coulter.
00:04:05.000 Every time I see that, I get pissed off.
00:04:09.000 Because after we were done the discussion, which was so guarded and safe that it's not out of the park controversial, Ann goes, we should have talked about sex.
00:04:19.000 And Gina's daughter is like 22 or something.
00:04:22.000 Gina Belafonte, of course, is the daughter of Harry Belafonte.
00:04:24.000 She grew up in the largest apartment in New York City.
00:04:28.000 Really?
00:04:28.000 22 rooms.
00:04:30.000 Wow.
00:04:31.000 I go, that's a hotel.
00:04:32.000 Multiple floors, I'm guessing.
00:04:35.000 Yes, Ryan.
00:04:36.000 It didn't take up seven city blocks with weird glass bridges to each different block.
00:04:44.000 And yeah, I didn't ask her about that either.
00:04:48.000 And they could have talked about sex. 0.70
00:04:50.000 Anne is fascinating when it comes to sex. 1.00
00:04:51.000 She talks about the problem with all this consent is that men are too scared to go near you anymore.
00:04:57.000 In the old days, you could sort of go, woo-hoo-hoo-hoo!
00:05:00.000 Get your hands off me, you cad! 1.00
00:05:02.000 And even if you stayed over at his house, the next morning, you could have the sheets up to your tits and be like, you're incorrigible! 1.00
00:05:09.000 Ugh! 1.00
00:05:09.000 I never! 1.00
00:05:11.000 And then go home and you're still chased.
00:05:14.000 And he's the bad guy.
00:05:15.000 Now, it's like, look, here's the deal. 1.00
00:05:19.000 I'll fuck you third date. 1.00
00:05:21.000 We'll do anal fourth date. 1.00
00:05:22.000 I'll suck your ass third date. 1.00
00:05:25.000 And you're like, eh, I really don't want to start making love to Vinny Bombazito. 1.00
00:05:32.000 I'm not horny anymore.
00:05:34.000 So yeah, we'll be taking calls and things of that nature, as rappers like to say.
00:05:42.000 But before we get started,
00:05:44.000 I cannot.
00:05:46.000 Let me just triple check.
00:05:47.000 I got the right sponsors here.
00:05:48.000 That's not very good.
00:05:51.000 That's not very good podcasting.
00:05:53.000 I cannot say enough about Bet DSI.
00:05:57.000 We talked about the fight last Saturday.
00:06:00.000 With Spence and Porter, it wasn't the best fight in the world.
00:06:04.000 Although, and I know I bully you when it comes to boxing, but look up the Spence-Porter fight outfits.
00:06:11.000 Because I think it was Spence who was wearing a gold vest, articulated vest, that looked exactly like, remember that Avengers, where those aliens come down from outer space through a portal that I think Tony Stark opened up?
00:06:29.000 And the Hulk and everyone has to get together and punch the aliens in the face!
00:06:36.000 So it's Errol Spence Jr. 0.90
00:06:37.000 come on outfit, I guess you'd call it. 0.99
00:06:42.000 His was this vest that was made up of different sections and the back of it went down below his ass like a tail. 0.99
00:06:49.000 Exactly like those aliens I'm talking about. 0.99
00:06:53.000 So, uh, I got that pick right there.
00:06:57.000 Is that not the vest?
00:06:59.000 No, dude, that's a normal vest.
00:07:01.000 We're already fighting very early on into the game.
00:07:04.000 It's, I think it was definitely not Porter or maybe it was Porter, Sean Porter, vest, Spence fight, you know, keywords.
00:07:14.000 And, um, I,
00:07:19.000 I bet on Spence on that fight.
00:07:21.000 And the problem with these fights in L.A.
00:07:23.000 is they go so long that they don't start until midnight New York time.
00:07:29.000 So by the time that I was, they had come to a decision, I just sort of saw brown blobs on the screen.
00:07:36.000 And I don't really remember even who won.
00:07:40.000 I haven't even collected on this bet, I'm actually just remembering it right now.
00:07:45.000 Okay, you're frustrating me.
00:07:47.000 Sean Porter, the come on outfit he wore.
00:07:51.000 Can I just complain about Ryan for a little while?
00:07:55.000 Last week we had a big fight where I said, do this video of you being Trump in the 80s and you as Trump in 2020.
00:08:01.000 And then I look over and it says, 80s Trump, Trump 2019.
00:08:04.000 I said, no, no, no, I told you, right?
00:08:06.000 Trump 1980, Trump 2020.
00:08:08.000 Okay, got it.
00:08:08.000 And then it comes out and it doesn't say that.
00:08:10.000 And I go, what's going on?
00:08:11.000 And he goes, well, it wasn't 2020, that was 2019.
00:08:15.000 And he has excuses later.
00:08:17.000 So he'll say, you'll say something, he'll go, got it, no problem.
00:08:21.000 And then you'll get the thing and it's the opposite of the thing, like this morning.
00:08:24.000 He goes, I'm gonna go get breakfast, you want something?
00:08:26.000 And he goes, what about, I go, let's get basic.
00:08:30.000 Let's just do our eggs, our cheese, our bacon.
00:08:34.000 You know, I wish there was a McDonald's nearby.
00:08:36.000 There is, he says, there isn't.
00:08:39.000 So I go, let's keep, and he goes, what about turkey?
00:08:42.000 I go, turkey's too adventurous for breakfast.
00:08:44.000 Breakfast, your stomach's sensitive.
00:08:46.000 You want to ease your way into it.
00:08:49.000 I'm confused.
00:08:51.000 What are you doing?
00:08:53.000 I typed Sporter... I mean Sean... Sean Porter Spence Vest.
00:08:57.000 Come on.
00:08:57.000 Then I put Sean Porter Vest.
00:08:59.000 Then I put uh... Gold Vest?
00:09:00.000 Maybe try it?
00:09:01.000 Gold Vest.
00:09:03.000 Come on music.
00:09:06.000 Anyway, he goes, yeah, let's get some turkey.
00:09:09.000 I go, turkey's too adventurous, dude.
00:09:11.000 Your stomach isn't ready for an adventure until maybe 2 p.m. 0.99
00:09:15.000 And he goes, um, all right, if I find this, I am going to stab you. 1.00
00:09:21.000 I want you to find it and get stabbed. 1.00
00:09:25.000 I want both of those things to happen. 0.99
00:09:28.000 Dude, boxing does not Google well.
00:09:42.000 Support local trade, support American cafes.
00:09:46.000 And he goes, okay, got it boss.
00:09:48.000 No turkey, go to the new guy. 1.00
00:09:51.000 Comes back, turkey sandwiches for everyone from the old illegal aliens place, which is now illegal to say in New York. 1.00
00:09:58.000 And I go, that's why you're dumb. 0.99
00:10:02.000 Because information doesn't go in. 0.99
00:10:04.000 I used to know this dude,
00:10:07.000 We're good to go.
00:10:19.000 And no other songs really went anywhere.
00:10:23.000 And they were around in the 80s, back when you didn't really make that much money.
00:10:26.000 So why is he rich?
00:10:27.000 And then we looked it up on the internet.
00:10:28.000 It turns out he was one of the pioneers of reality television.
00:10:32.000 And he got involved not just in copywriting these various shows, but also in new media.
00:10:38.000 And he caught the first reality TV wave.
00:10:41.000 Gotcha. 0.97
00:10:42.000 So my dumb friend's original theory was, it's because he's a sir. 0.97
00:10:47.000 And I go, what? 0.99
00:10:48.000 That's just some gay nomenclature that the Queen gives you. 0.95
00:10:51.000 All right, you're a sir. 0.93
00:10:51.000 You know, go away, Sir Elton John, Sir Paul McCartney. 0.93
00:10:54.000 You had some good songs.
00:10:57.000 And we look it up.
00:10:59.000 No, it's new media and reality TV, dude.
00:11:02.000 And he goes, no, I think it's the sir thing.
00:11:04.000 I go, wait a minute.
00:11:06.000 You don't make money from being a sir.
00:11:07.000 He goes, no, I think you get a stipend from the Queen.
00:11:10.000 What are you, ten?
00:11:12.000 I'm the Queen of England!
00:11:13.000 I have big bags of money!
00:11:15.000 Here's some money, sir!
00:11:17.000 All my sirs get a big bag of gold coins every month!
00:11:21.000 And the fact that he stuck to his sur thing after we had information is the same way Ryan sticks to his turkey in the morning.
00:11:31.000 Or even his tukies.
00:11:32.000 He had too many tukies when we did that Puerto Rican song. 1.00
00:11:35.000 Too many tukies. 1.00
00:11:36.000 Too many tukies, too many turkeys. 1.00
00:11:38.000 Not enough information.
00:11:41.000 Vest coming up.
00:11:44.000 This is from... Look at this!
00:11:48.000 I guess he's going for a gladiator thing?
00:11:50.000 Are you not entertained?!
00:11:56.000 I bet on Spence.
00:11:57.000 Can you just say who won? 0.99
00:11:59.000 Wait, wait, keep going with that ridiculous vest. 1.00
00:12:02.000 And his ridiculous walk. 0.99
00:12:03.000 What are you doing, dude? 0.99
00:12:05.000 Do you think you're Caesar?
00:12:07.000 It's really getting into the vest.
00:12:13.000 By the way, if you're trying to get your wife into boxing, make sure you show her this part of the game. 1.00
00:12:17.000 And she can see it's like voguing, and they're drag queens. 1.00
00:12:20.000 And then she gets excited about the outfits.
00:12:23.000 Especially Deontay Wilder, who comes out dressed like Shredder, but encrusted in diamonds.
00:12:29.000 You gotta see the back of this thing.
00:12:31.000 Anyway, this is All-Star Bet DSI Reads, so keep showing that, because I hope they show the back.
00:12:36.000 BetDSI offers betting options for everything.
00:12:38.000 Bet on fighting, NBA, March Madness, NFL, NHL, NCAA football, and all other major sports, politics, reality TV, eSports, virtually everything.
00:12:49.000 They've got a very friendly interface mobile site, and I think they've got the best payouts in the business.
00:12:54.000 They've been paying winners for over 20 years, and they're top rated on betting review sites.
00:13:00.000 So use your sports knowledge to make some extra cash this week.
00:13:04.000 There it is.
00:13:04.000 Yeah, you saw the background for a second there.
00:13:06.000 It's like that hissing cockroach from Madagascar.
00:13:09.000 Yeah.
00:13:10.000 By the way, you'll notice in movies when they say, here's some roaches, I eat roaches, I'm a monster or whatever.
00:13:14.000 It's always the Madagascar hissing cockroach. 1.00
00:13:17.000 Yeah.
00:13:17.000 Because those are the only ones you can buy online.
00:13:20.000 Actual cockroaches that we have in our house.
00:13:22.000 Well, not me personally, you know, the lower classes.
00:13:25.000 They look nothing like that.
00:13:28.000 So who won that fight?
00:13:30.000 The fight that I watched every minute of?
00:13:32.000 You really did?
00:13:33.000 Yeah.
00:13:34.000 I think Spence beat Porter.
00:13:36.000 Spence beat Porter.
00:13:39.000 You know, Spence, I think, is known as a boxer and Porter's known as a fighter.
00:13:41.000 They both look like fighters to me.
00:13:43.000 That whole night was brawls.
00:13:45.000 What's the difference?
00:13:47.000 A boxer is like, boop, boop, boop, boop, ooh, move, move, the sweet science.
00:13:50.000 And then a fighter is just in a fight.
00:13:54.000 Like Mike Tyson, I would call a fighter.
00:13:56.000 Yep.
00:13:56.000 And then there's brawlers, right?
00:13:58.000 Then there's like Butterbean.
00:13:58.000 No, that's all fighters.
00:13:59.000 Oh, okay.
00:14:00.000 Butterbean's a fighter.
00:14:02.000 Anyway, go to betdsi.com, use the promo code Gavin, and you will get a limited time 100% bonus offer, plus a $25 free wager to test the waters.
00:14:14.000 Don't miss out, and go make some extra cash betting this season.
00:14:18.000 Wait a minute, so who did I bet on?
00:14:20.000 Spence?
00:14:21.000 And who won?
00:14:21.000 Porter?
00:14:23.000 Um, Sean Porter lost.
00:14:26.000 That's good.
00:14:28.000 So you won?
00:14:28.000 I won.
00:14:28.000 I can't even remember how much I bet.
00:14:31.000 That's the fun thing about betting, too.
00:14:33.000 Once you're betting and you're excited about it, then it all happens. 0.99
00:14:36.000 Unless you get shit-faced. 0.99
00:14:38.000 Then you can't remember the fight. 0.99
00:14:39.000 And that's the problem with fights on the West Coast.
00:14:43.000 By 12, us dads, who have to get up with the kids at 7am, we're toast.
00:14:48.000 Especially if we've been drinking.
00:14:49.000 Thanks to Loaf Michaels on Parler, by the way, for telling me to search entrance music.
00:14:54.000 Tron Porter entrance music.
00:14:56.000 So you're so bad at your job that people at home are contacting you during the show and telling you how to do your job.
00:15:03.000 But I'm such a nice guy, I gave credit to him.
00:15:06.000 Front page of the Post today.
00:15:08.000 Fightin' Words.
00:15:08.000 Fightin' Words.
00:15:10.000 Maybe you could read this as Trump, Ryan?
00:15:12.000 Fightin' Words.
00:15:14.000 I can't see the font.
00:15:16.000 It sounds strange to say I'm energized, but I love it.
00:15:18.000 I love it.
00:15:19.000 Oh, I see.
00:15:20.000 President Trump talks to Michael Goodwin, who, if you know the Post, is like the major, the main guy.
00:15:26.000 He goes back to the old days.
00:15:27.000 He got cut his chops at the New York Times. 0.95
00:15:30.000 Like another great American journalist, Bill McGowan, who wrote two books shitting on the New York Times.
00:15:39.000 I think he got his start at the Times.
00:15:42.000 See, the Times is two things.
00:15:44.000 There's Arthur Salzberg
00:15:48.000 Senior, who was maybe a little liberal, but was fair.
00:15:52.000 That's back in the 60s liberals, where they were about free speech and stuff.
00:15:57.000 The Dave Rubin, Jordan Peterson type liberals, back when they were cool.
00:16:00.000 Cornel West is one of those guys.
00:16:02.000 I get along with those guys. 1.00
00:16:03.000 They just want too much fucking welfare. 1.00
00:16:07.000 They're too socialist. 1.00
00:16:10.000 It's the new ones that suck, but... 0.99
00:16:15.000 That's the old New York Times. 0.98
00:16:16.000 Then his son, Pinch, took it over.
00:16:18.000 His son's a rich kid.
00:16:19.000 And so his son went on a diversity tangent and started hiring people based on their ethnicity and their gender. 1.00
00:16:25.000 And he turned the paper into a total fucking shithole. 0.99
00:16:27.000 Then Bill McGowan wrote Grey Lady Down and Coloring the News, lampooning them. 1.00
00:16:32.000 And now they suck so bad that even the left hates them. 0.99
00:16:34.000 That's the problem with getting into bed with the alt-left. 1.00
00:16:36.000 They're insatiable.
00:16:38.000 And they're gonna turn on you at some point.
00:16:41.000 Don't hire women. 1.00
00:16:43.000 And definitely don't hire trannies. 1.00
00:16:45.000 Hey, speaking of socialism, have you got that video of the, not a cock fight, but a butt fight? 0.97
00:16:50.000 Do you remember that?
00:16:52.000 I can't remember if it's in the notes or not.
00:16:53.000 The cock butt fight. 0.80
00:16:54.000 Yeah. 0.97
00:16:55.000 In the prison.
00:16:55.000 It might be at the very end.
00:16:57.000 No, it's not at the very end.
00:16:59.000 Where did I put that?
00:17:00.000 Prison guards.
00:17:01.000 Yeah, that's it.
00:17:01.000 Prison guards.
00:17:03.000 This is not a cock fight, it's a butt fight. 0.99
00:17:06.000 And this is what socialism generates. 0.78
00:17:10.000 You gotta hear the audio at the beginning, though, because the prison guards are laughing.
00:17:15.000 There we go.
00:17:19.000 Yeah, I think the headline of this was... There's your socialism, kids!
00:17:25.000 Prison guards laugh as cockfight happens on naked prisoners?
00:17:28.000 Yeah, the translation for that is like, uh... This is hard to watch, but we can't look away.
00:17:34.000 Yeah, we cannot turn away.
00:17:36.000 It's another violation of human rights in Venezuela.
00:17:39.000 No, it's not an example of human rights being violated in Venezuela.
00:17:42.000 It's an example of socialism.
00:17:44.000 This is what you end up with.
00:17:46.000 So many people in prison that you lie them on their bellies, and they're hip to hip, and then you get so bored, and there's no law and order, there's nothing, so you say, let's have a cockfight.
00:17:55.000 And then your buddy goes, what about this? 0.98
00:17:57.000 What about a cockfight on a bunch of butts? 0.99
00:18:00.000 Bare butts. 1.00
00:18:01.000 And then, instead of going, oh, you're insane, you can't work here anymore, the friend goes, let's do this. 0.99
00:18:09.000 I think I want to get into cockfights. 1.00
00:18:11.000 Not hitting my penis against other peni, but like, cockfights. 1.00
00:18:15.000 Do they happen in... You're Puerto Rican, do they happen in New York? 1.00
00:18:19.000 Uh, I don't... I'm sure some places in America have them.
00:18:22.000 Let's get into the cockfight scene, that's my new goal. 1.00
00:18:24.000 Alright.
00:18:24.000 It's a weird goal.
00:18:25.000 That's something I want to conquer.
00:18:27.000 Weird thing to conquer.
00:18:28.000 At my gym downstairs, it's a big grocery store that I think is mostly Dominican, and they have this table that you bring to your picnics that's like 70 bucks.
00:18:38.000 It's a really nice fold-out table that's wood, oak, and stained, and it's like Dominican Republic, and the flag and stuff, but the main image is two roosters, like, fighting each other.
00:18:50.000 I thought, I want to know, I want to be a cock fight guy. 0.99
00:18:53.000 Imagine you have your cock, 1.00
00:18:56.000 That's your main cock? 1.00
00:18:58.000 You'd have to, like, take care of it, raisin all this. 1.00
00:19:00.000 Like, I'm basically gay. 1.00
00:19:01.000 I have my top cock. 1.00
00:19:05.000 Yeah, maybe you breed them? 1.00
00:19:07.000 Like horses?
00:19:08.000 Maybe you know their names?
00:19:09.000 Oh, there's old Feathertail again!
00:19:11.000 He's a welterweight champion!
00:19:13.000 I love how people are outraged about this.
00:19:17.000 It's unethical!
00:19:19.000 As they eat a chicken sandwich.
00:19:25.000 Okay, that's good.
00:19:25.000 New goal.
00:19:28.000 Speaking of Trump, by the way, we're going to be... I had an epiphany that I wrote down most of that we're going to show later on where we explain Trump Derangement Syndrome and who's behind it.
00:19:41.000 We also... I'm going to get Nate Ober on the show.
00:19:43.000 I might have Joy Villa on the show in Pie Meany. 1.00
00:19:50.000 Nope.
00:19:50.000 Oh shoot, can we reschedule?
00:19:51.000 Just waking up. 0.56
00:19:52.000 Farts.
00:19:56.000 Actually, we'll still be on the air, we just won't give the people this.
00:19:59.000 Ah, yes, yes, yes.
00:20:01.000 What is it with broads and them needing an hour to get ready? 1.00
00:20:05.000 Yeah, and they got their own swords.
00:20:08.000 Like even, you wash your face, put on your makeup, how long can it take to put on makeup?
00:20:14.000 20 minutes max?
00:20:15.000 That should mean 2.45.
00:20:18.000 Zwanzig minuten.
00:20:20.000 What does that mean?
00:20:21.000 20 minutes.
00:20:22.000 Oh god, you're annoying.
00:20:23.000 It's German.
00:20:26.000 Um... Yes?
00:20:27.000 Remember that PowerTie thing?
00:20:29.000 Yep, yep.
00:20:30.000 So let's... PowerTie... What was the first video I did of his?
00:20:33.000 Well... The first one that you became familiar with was the Braveheart one.
00:20:39.000 Um... And I think you'll probably explain it, but uh... I discovered this guy, basically.
00:20:47.000 Right.
00:20:47.000 Alright.
00:20:48.000 Do you remember this?
00:20:51.000 I probably retweeted it because I'm in it.
00:20:53.000 Is that correct?
00:20:55.000 Yeah, there I am.
00:20:56.000 Oh yeah!
00:21:12.000 That's a lot of work.
00:21:13.000 Yeah.
00:21:14.000 Keep showing it.
00:21:15.000 When they threatened his world and the woman he loved, he was driven to war.
00:21:23.000 Can you just pause?
00:21:25.000 That's the impetus for the movie Braveheart and it was the impetus for a lot of the rebellions the Scots had against the English. 0.91
00:21:30.000 Who's the fuckwad who came up with the idea of English noblemen can bone Scotsman's wives the night of their marriage? 0.96
00:21:40.000 What were you thinking? 1.00
00:21:41.000 Of course you're gonna get killed, dumbass! 1.00
00:21:44.000 Greed. 1.00
00:21:45.000 You know what the beginning of the slavery rebellion was in Haiti? 0.98
00:21:47.000 Where they ended up slaughtering thousands of white women and children and the the new black leaders were drinking white people's blood out of their skulls. 0.98
00:21:59.000 You know what started that slaughter? 1.00
00:22:01.000 Some shit-for-brains said, you know these slaves are 1.00
00:22:06.000 Spoiled rotten. 1.00
00:22:07.000 Every Sunday we let them go to church and worship their silly voodoo gods. 1.00
00:22:12.000 Let's reduce that to zero days off. 0.98
00:22:15.000 I'm not advocating for slavery here. 0.97
00:22:18.000 I'm just saying you're abusing the shit out of someone and then some rich kid like Uday Hussain type kid decides let's ramp it up a little bit and just put him one last screw. 0.99
00:22:29.000 Let's just... I'm not fucking them hard enough. 1.00
00:22:32.000 Let me put one up the ass too. 1.00
00:22:34.000 And then eventually 1.00
00:22:37.000 People snap.
00:22:37.000 Anyway, sorry, that was a total tangent.
00:22:44.000 I don't like to put chemicals in the water that turn the friggin' frogs gay! 1.00
00:22:52.000 Get out of here! 1.00
00:22:55.000 Get out! 0.98
00:22:57.000 Go home to mommy! 0.90
00:22:59.000 Go home!
00:23:01.000 Bye!
00:23:01.000 Dude, that is so... That's better than the movie.
00:23:06.000 Oh man.
00:23:08.000 Is Trump better than Braveheart?
00:23:09.000 I would say.
00:23:15.000 It's Ty.
00:23:15.000 Diamond and Silk.
00:23:21.000 That is so good.
00:23:22.000 So good!
00:23:23.000 Frankly, so good.
00:23:25.000 Did you see?
00:23:26.000 This is also in the news before we get back to, what's his name, Pi-Ty?
00:23:29.000 Power-Ty.
00:23:30.000 Power-Ty.
00:23:33.000 So there's that, look at this picture!
00:23:35.000 What is that?
00:23:36.000 Look at this photograph!
00:23:39.000 Yeah.
00:23:39.000 Which, by the way, speaking of Ryan and his unbelievably bad taste in music.
00:23:43.000 Don't do it.
00:23:44.000 Huge Nickelback fan.
00:23:45.000 That's not, it's not a huge Nickelback fan.
00:23:47.000 They're good.
00:23:48.000 They crank out the hits.
00:23:48.000 They're good, frankly.
00:23:50.000 And they've been with me since middle school.
00:23:52.000 I don't care, so has Venerey Awards.
00:23:54.000 That doesn't mean it's good.
00:23:56.000 But it's...
00:23:57.000 You love Nickelback.
00:23:59.000 When people are making fun of someone, they go, he's the kind of guy who likes Nickelback.
00:24:02.000 You're a type of guy.
00:24:03.000 Yeah, and that's, you know what?
00:24:05.000 That's mob mentality, that's crowd think, and that you're a sheep.
00:24:09.000 Okay? 0.99
00:24:09.000 I'm just gonna say you're a sheep. 0.99
00:24:11.000 Since when did everybody... What's that food they have in France?
00:24:14.000 Entrails?
00:24:14.000 Tripe?
00:24:15.000 Head cheese?
00:24:16.000 I hate tripe.
00:24:17.000 That's mob mentality. 1.00
00:24:19.000 It has nothing to do, of course, with pigs' entrails being disgusting. 0.99
00:24:22.000 It's because I'm just following the herd. 0.80
00:24:24.000 That's why I hate liverwurst.
00:24:25.000 When did this happen?
00:24:27.000 Brussels Sprouts.
00:24:28.000 I don't know.
00:24:29.000 They work hard.
00:24:29.000 They're a hard-working band.
00:24:30.000 They're good.
00:24:31.000 Yeah, hard-working band.
00:24:32.000 A lot of hits.
00:24:33.000 A lot of hits, frankly. 0.62
00:24:34.000 People crap on them all the time.
00:24:36.000 Look at this photograph. 0.99
00:24:37.000 So look at this.
00:24:38.000 So they did a... Well, let me show you the viral thing first.
00:24:44.000 I think it's after Trump tweet removed.
00:24:47.000 Mountain Dew Dorito Band.
00:24:48.000 Oh, that's... Everything's in the notes.
00:24:50.000 That's my line.
00:24:52.000 Okay, gotcha.
00:24:54.000 Ryan, before we started filming, said, people call Nickelback like a Mountain Dew Dorito band.
00:24:59.000 And I go, yeah, because they are.
00:25:01.000 So look at that.
00:25:02.000 So Trump retweeted Power Ties video that we haven't shown you yet, but it's awesome.
00:25:07.000 And then Nickelback had it removed because it was good for Trump.
00:25:12.000 But if you scroll down, you'll see that it still exists.
00:25:16.000 Is it gone?
00:25:17.000 We're mixing two things up here.
00:25:19.000 The Nickelback one was totally separate.
00:25:21.000 I sent you the Nickelback one.
00:25:22.000 Yeah.
00:25:23.000 Totally separate from power tie.
00:25:27.000 Yes, that's true.
00:25:29.000 So go back to the Nickelback one.
00:25:31.000 Sorry, I'm not being very consistent here.
00:25:33.000 Oh, and the reason I meant, I'll tell you the link, because Donald Trump retweeted this look at this photograph thing, but he also retweeted power ties thing.
00:25:42.000 Yeah.
00:25:42.000 So I'm sort of going in reverse order here.
00:25:44.000 So let's go to the look at this photograph one.
00:25:46.000 Can you find it?
00:25:48.000 It's the second link right there.
00:25:51.000 There we go.
00:25:51.000 Yeah, there we go.
00:25:54.000 Have you ever spoken to your son about his overseas business dealings?
00:25:58.000 I've never spoken to my son about his overseas business dealings.
00:26:02.000 Look at this photograph.
00:26:05.000 Every time I do it makes me laugh.
00:26:07.000 How did our eyes get so red?
00:26:10.000 And what the hell is on Joey's head?
00:26:15.000 You like that band?
00:26:16.000 Yeah.
00:26:17.000 How did our eyes get so red?
00:26:19.000 And as we lie beneath the stars, we realize how small we are.
00:26:25.000 Look at that hat on Joey's head.
00:26:29.000 How did our eyes get so red?
00:26:31.000 You're not doing a good job of... Look at that hat on Joey's head. 1.00
00:26:37.000 Yeah, I can make Stairway to Heaven sound stupid. 1.00
00:26:39.000 She's flying Stairway to Heaven. 1.00
00:26:43.000 I can make cool things sound stupid, too. 0.97
00:26:44.000 He's got like a weird bob, like he's a page from the 14th century. 0.98
00:26:47.000 Yeah, no, he doesn't look good.
00:26:48.000 He dresses like he has the plague.
00:26:51.000 Yeah, he does look like he's ill from some sort of 16th century illness, but... So anyway, Trump retweeted that.
00:26:57.000 It got shut down.
00:26:59.000 And Trump retweeted... PowerTie's newest video!
00:27:04.000 That's right. 0.98
00:27:04.000 Which is like this aha thing where they have to draw on every frame, and it's fucking beautiful. 0.98
00:27:10.000 Like, it's gonna be hard for you not to tear up. 0.90
00:27:13.000 Six million views on Twitter.
00:27:15.000 Six million views since Trump retweeted it and I discovered this guy.
00:27:19.000 And I discovered it because I'm vain and I saw my face in it and I said, this is cool.
00:27:25.000 And this guy has good taste. 0.99
00:27:26.000 That's the thing about ass lickers. 1.00
00:27:28.000 If they're around me, then I think they have good taste. 0.99
00:27:31.000 Yeah. 0.98
00:27:32.000 I'm not calling power tie an ass licker. 1.00
00:27:33.000 It's a joke, fuckhead. 1.00
00:27:34.000 I'll give you one message. 1.00
00:27:40.000 If I give you one message to hold in your hearts today, it's this.
00:27:46.000 Treat the word impossible as nothing more than motivation.
00:27:52.000 Relish the opportunity to be an outsider because it's the outsiders who change the world and who make a real and lasting difference.
00:28:02.000 The more that a broken system tells you that you're wrong, the more certain you should be that you must keep pushing ahead.
00:28:12.000 You must keep pushing forward.
00:28:20.000 So good.
00:28:20.000 Get fired, get in trouble, be brave, and never stop fighting.
00:28:25.000 That guy's great.
00:28:26.000 It gave me Mr. Rogers vibes.
00:28:33.000 Ryan.
00:28:34.000 Okay, Tanner.
00:28:35.000 We're dealing with the most powerful man in the Western world.
00:28:40.000 But he's also a sweetie.
00:28:41.000 This is the head of the greatest superpower in history.
00:28:44.000 He actually is much more consequential than Braveheart, and you decide the best comparison would be some clown in a cardigan from a children's show 50 years ago?
00:28:55.000 If you'll allow me to, I will explain very briefly.
00:28:57.000 Please don't.
00:28:59.000 He always... okay.
00:29:02.000 Well, we have the creator of that, goes by the name of Powertie, at Powertie on Twitter.
00:29:07.000 Powertie, is it true that the actual original pronunciation of your name is Powertie?
00:29:15.000 That's correct, yes.
00:29:16.000 I thought so.
00:29:17.000 Does it drive you nuts when people say Powertie?
00:29:21.000 It really bothers me.
00:29:22.000 My family's considered changing it since we've immigrated to America.
00:29:29.000 Well, I have a cousin named Shitstain, which in Gaelic means leader of free people.
00:29:38.000 But he's having a lot of trouble in grade school here.
00:29:41.000 He's eight and he's considering changing it.
00:29:43.000 So you guys are in the same boat.
00:29:46.000 It'll make him stronger, Gavin. 0.93
00:29:48.000 If I were to be totally honest, I would tell you that my original thought that went through my head involved making that bad word a racial epithet, but I restrained and I changed it to shit stain, which is not as funny. 0.83
00:30:02.000 Uh, how you doing? 0.88
00:30:03.000 So, so that thing got a lot, lot of retweets.
00:30:08.000 Yes, it did.
00:30:09.000 The, uh, the big man himself shared it, which was a pretty wild experience.
00:30:14.000 So you're on the big man's radar.
00:30:16.000 How long did that take you to make?
00:30:19.000 That took about five months.
00:30:22.000 Everyone thinks it was a, you know, an effect or a video filter, but it was not.
00:30:27.000 I did it the hard way.
00:30:29.000 I did draw everything by hand.
00:30:30.000 It was probably hundreds of hours.
00:30:33.000 I don't know how many.
00:30:34.000 You know, this is my problem with interviewing people about great art is you demystify it and it's like watching a woman put on her lingerie. 1.00
00:30:41.000 I'm kind of ruining, I shouldn't have even called you.
00:30:45.000 Okay, I can hang up.
00:30:47.000 Yeah, just hang up.
00:30:48.000 No, I think what's important is that... Johnny Apples CBD is... It's a pun on Johnny Appleseed.
00:30:56.000 You get it?
00:30:56.000 So it's J-A-C-B-D.
00:30:58.000 You can hang up now, Ryan.
00:30:59.000 Oh, we're really hanging up?
00:31:00.000 Yeah.
00:31:00.000 Thanks for the call, dude.
00:31:01.000 You rule. 1.00
00:31:02.000 Oh God, you're such a pussy. 1.00
00:31:06.000 You just ruin shit, don't you? 1.00
00:31:07.000 Well, I was going to go through his replies to this, because it's pretty funny. 1.00
00:31:10.000 He, like, thwarted, you know, battled a couple of people.
00:31:13.000 What did he say?
00:31:13.000 Uh, well, waking life.
00:31:16.000 Okay.
00:31:17.000 Is it just me, or does the propaganda got real lazy?
00:31:20.000 They thought it was from Trump's campaign.
00:31:21.000 Right.
00:31:22.000 So did I, actually.
00:31:23.000 Yeah.
00:31:24.000 And he said, lazy?
00:31:25.000 That hurts.
00:31:26.000 I had to draw every frame by hand.
00:31:27.000 Took months.
00:31:28.000 Demand an apology.
00:31:29.000 Every frame by hand that must have killed your sex life.
00:31:31.000 And he comes back with, not everyone's sex life revolves around their hand.
00:31:35.000 Good zingers, dude.
00:31:37.000 That is good.
00:31:39.000 But again, I'm going through this weird stage where I don't see interviews as helpful.
00:31:43.000 All I did was demystify it by hearing that he drew that for months, which we kind of knew.
00:31:48.000 Maybe you asked the wrong question. 0.51
00:31:49.000 Maybe I'm a shitty interviewer. 0.87
00:31:52.000 That might be the issue here. 0.99
00:31:53.000 You should ask him about sex.
00:31:54.000 So, do you get laid from all this stuff? 0.51
00:31:55.000 Like, I know you're talented.
00:31:56.000 I bet you got tons of girls. 1.00
00:31:58.000 Hey, Robin?
00:31:59.000 Yeah, yeah.
00:32:02.000 JACBD.com is a place where we get our CBD.
00:32:09.000 By the way, I've been doing a lot of workouts and I've noticed that when you do a bunch of arm stuff, 0.98
00:32:33.000 And you'll notice the beta males, they always say that you must be working out to overcome something, not just to stay in shape and be the kind of guy that can beat the shit out of someone who slaps your mom.
00:32:46.000 But I find that arm pain the next day, it feels kind of good.
00:32:50.000 Like you go, oh, good, I'm building muscles.
00:32:53.000 Leg pain, not so much.
00:32:55.000 Going up and down the stairs like George Burns, or going down the stairs, you're going, hi, hi, hi, hi, yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:33:02.000 I don't like that.
00:33:03.000 So, though I totally advocate for using CBD as a great anti-inflammatory, there's another way to avoid serious pain is cheat.
00:33:13.000 So if you're doing stairs at the gym and no one can see you, have a break.
00:33:19.000 Sneak out onto the roof.
00:33:21.000 I might do a video on how to box and show people all my tricks.
00:33:25.000 We should do that, yeah.
00:33:27.000 Yeah.
00:33:27.000 Like, another trick I do is he goes, alright, do a heavy bag for three rounds.
00:33:32.000 Okay, coach.
00:33:33.000 Right away, sir.
00:33:35.000 Then I find a heavy bag that's like a blackout area, a blind spot from the coach.
00:33:41.000 Did you just change the lighting mid-show?
00:33:43.000 Yeah.
00:33:43.000 That's called continuity.
00:33:46.000 And I hit the heavy bag and then, beep beep, when the bell rings, the round is over, I hide there.
00:33:53.000 After my three rounds.
00:33:54.000 And then when it's time to get a new assignment, I give it a good 20 seconds and then walk over to the coach, even though I was hiding, and be like, hello? 0.98
00:34:03.000 He's like, oh shit, okay, how long you been a double-ended bag? 0.95
00:34:08.000 Okay, I mean, I'm not a mind reader. 1.00
00:34:10.000 You know, does he not watch the show?
00:34:15.000 He might not have a subscription, but he can go on YouTube.
00:34:17.000 This is the free portion.
00:34:19.000 That's how much I love you guys.
00:34:21.000 I give away my secrets.
00:34:22.000 Like, he's gonna see this.
00:34:23.000 He's gonna find you and be like, Boxer!
00:34:27.000 What are you doing, Boxer?
00:34:27.000 Another good trick, by the way, is, um... Yeah, I might do two videos.
00:34:33.000 One on how to box that says things like, put your headgear on slightly loose, so when you're sparring it goes, and then you go, oh shit! 0.96
00:34:43.000 Guys, look at this. 0.97
00:34:46.000 Meanwhile, the clock is ticking.
00:34:48.000 I gotta get my headgear back on, obviously.
00:34:50.000 I mean, we can't fight like this.
00:34:53.000 Come here, come here, come here!
00:34:54.000 I can't wait for him to hear this and then be like, keep fighting boxer!
00:34:59.000 And you'll be like, wait, but my thing is off.
00:35:02.000 Another funny video we got to do is how to box where I say like, here's the importance of a left hook.
00:35:08.000 You want to swivel, you want to use your hips, it's all in the leg.
00:35:10.000 And then I use, I demonstrate on a guy who fights me for real.
00:35:14.000 Because in every instructional video, like how to disarm someone with a knife, the guy with a knife is always like,
00:35:21.000 He's never trying to stab you. 0.97
00:35:23.000 So it would be funny if I'm demonstrating this thing on people who just beat the shit out of me. 0.99
00:35:27.000 Right. 0.98
00:35:28.000 It takes longer than three seconds.
00:35:31.000 Yeah. 1.00
00:35:32.000 Even in fucking action movies. 0.99
00:35:33.000 I can't get... Once you see this, you can't unsee it. 0.99
00:35:36.000 The guy about to get punched always goes like this.
00:35:40.000 Yeah.
00:35:41.000 They ready themselves for the fight. 0.85
00:35:43.000 And then right before he gets punched he's going, I'm gonna get punched! 0.55
00:35:46.000 Yeah.
00:35:47.000 That's not how, you don't, you go, ah! 1.00
00:35:49.000 You don't go, what the fuck? 0.99
00:35:51.000 Oh no, Batman's here! 1.00
00:35:52.000 What the?
00:35:54.000 Remember we were talking yesterday about the Joker?
00:35:57.000 Where he cuts his mouth open?
00:35:59.000 Yeah.
00:36:00.000 And the guy just goes.
00:36:02.000 Yeah, that guy's gone.
00:36:02.000 He's dead.
00:36:03.000 You've killed him. 0.62
00:36:04.000 How'd your friend die? 0.99
00:36:05.000 He got a cut in his mouth.
00:36:06.000 Yeah.
00:36:07.000 Oh.
00:36:08.000 With AIDS? 0.82
00:36:10.000 Was the knife made of poo?
00:36:12.000 Well, it is conceivable that he had some kind of Joker toxin.
00:36:15.000 Ooh, spooky.
00:36:16.000 Okay, that's different.
00:36:17.000 Yeah. 0.89
00:36:18.000 By the way, getting your mouth cut like this, Joker, is a bad day in Glasgow.
00:36:22.000 It's called a Glasgow smile. 0.99
00:36:23.000 And about a third of the fucking tough guys have scar, scar. 1.00
00:36:28.000 Your worst bad guy is a regular Joe in fucking Glasgow. 1.00
00:36:31.000 Just an average guy. 0.98
00:36:33.000 So if you go to CBD.com and use the promo code GAVIN at checkout, you get 20% off.
00:36:39.000 20%!
00:36:41.000 By the way, while we're still free, I should probably mention our third sponsor, Covfefe,
00:36:48.000 Which comes in three delicious blends.
00:36:52.000 You come in three delicious blends? 1.00
00:36:54.000 Stupid, retarded, and annoying. 1.00
00:36:58.000 They're not delicious. 1.00
00:37:00.000 They're not really different.
00:37:02.000 This is what we drink here in the studio.
00:37:05.000 And though Ryan runs to go and get examples of these three things, we got whole bean.
00:37:11.000 Oh wait, they're all whole bean.
00:37:13.000 We got Magga Blend Dark Roast.
00:37:16.000 We got Drain the Swamp Medium Roast, and we have Red Pill Light Roast.
00:37:20.000 And I'm laughing because before I bought the grinder on Amazon for, I think, $17, were you smashing these with a hammer?
00:37:27.000 Yep.
00:37:29.000 Wait, you don't have a hammer.
00:37:31.000 No, I brought you a hammer.
00:37:32.000 Yes, yes.
00:37:33.000 But you weren't using a hammer.
00:37:35.000 You were using part of a piece of furniture.
00:37:36.000 All of my personal stash is crushed with hammers.
00:37:40.000 No, no, no. 1.00
00:37:41.000 You didn't use the hammer I bought you because you're too dumb to know that there's a hammer right there. 0.99
00:37:46.000 In the cupboard, which you don't even use ever. 0.99
00:37:48.000 I use tools.
00:37:49.000 Your jacket's on your chair right now.
00:37:50.000 I got a whole tool kit.
00:37:52.000 But you, I remember it was the, it was like the base of a coffee table.
00:37:56.000 And you were putting the beans in a paper towel and then smashing them with that. 1.00
00:38:00.000 You're a fucking caveman. 1.00
00:38:01.000 Before the hammer, I was using this, this stein. 1.00
00:38:05.000 Using a stein.
00:38:06.000 You know who else used steins?
00:38:08.000 People 500 years ago.
00:38:10.000 You're looking at me in the past.
00:38:11.000 Look how laggy this is.
00:38:14.000 Well, that's really bad.
00:38:15.000 Pretty cool.
00:38:16.000 And I could fix it. 0.94
00:38:18.000 Well, that's gonna come up in interviews and shit. 0.97
00:38:20.000 We might get Joyvilla. 0.98
00:38:22.000 No, no, no, that's just my camp.
00:38:23.000 It's just the thing.
00:38:24.000 But by the way, this comes in ground, too.
00:38:26.000 Not just whole beef, but ground.
00:38:28.000 Can you... What was I gonna say?
00:38:34.000 Go to the Covfefe site, please.
00:38:37.000 So people can see how to spell it.
00:38:39.000 That also, everything we say, BetDSI, JACBD.com, and Cavefe has the promo code GAVIN, G-A-V-I-N.
00:38:50.000 And I believe it gets you 20% off in each one.
00:38:53.000 So that's it.
00:38:55.000 And what's the URL there?
00:38:56.000 Show the URL so people can look at it.
00:38:57.000 It's doyoucavifi.com.
00:38:59.000 Showing it in a second.
00:38:59.000 doyoucavifi.com.
00:39:03.000 There you go.
00:39:04.000 Yep.
00:39:05.000 And now you can buy coffee.
00:39:06.000 You're buying coffee anyway, why not use our sponsors?
00:39:10.000 People who make their products in America, or... Actually, I don't know if Covfefe is made in America.
00:39:17.000 No, I think it is.
00:39:18.000 World-class, blah blah.
00:39:21.000 I don't know.
00:39:21.000 It says United States right there.
00:39:24.000 It says made in United States?
00:39:25.000 It just says United States, period.
00:39:27.000 A lot of it is made in the United States, okay?
00:39:29.000 Yeah.
00:39:29.000 We know that, uh, um...
00:39:32.000 Fucking J-A-C-B-D is, too. 1.00
00:39:34.000 And by the way, you can also go to... American made. 1.00
00:39:36.000 J-A-C-B-D. 1.00
00:39:37.000 American made.
00:39:37.000 You can go to JohnnyApple.com as well.
00:39:39.000 It's two links.
00:39:41.000 It's two links.
00:39:42.000 They'll both link you there.
00:39:43.000 They're both links.
00:39:44.000 That's right.
00:39:44.000 Okay, let's get serious for a second here.
00:39:46.000 We've been fucking around too much, and we've got a lot of Trump stuff to cover. 0.72
00:39:50.000 Let me put my sponsors away, because we won't be doing any more sponsors now. 0.91
00:39:53.000 Oh, one more thing, too.
00:39:54.000 That guy... By the way, when you sign up to freespeech.tv, you don't hear any sponsors.
00:39:58.000 The only sponsors we do is on the free episode.
00:40:00.000 Right.
00:40:01.000 What were you gonna say?
00:40:02.000 He's also, the Powertie guy who did all the Trump stuff, has also participated heavily in the Shmary Caravello thing from Windy City Heat.
00:40:11.000 Boy, you're such a Perry Project rookie.
00:40:14.000 You don't have to mispronounce it, you misspell it.
00:40:17.000 Perry Caravello.
00:40:18.000 And folks, 0.99
00:40:19.000 Dammit. 0.80
00:40:20.000 Windy City Heat is a great introduction to a project I've been working on for many years called the Perry Project. 0.99
00:40:25.000 Careful before you get involved.
00:40:26.000 Careful before you watch Windy City Heat because once you start, you won't be able to stop.
00:40:32.000 It's heroin. 0.95
00:40:33.000 It's like sex, actually.
00:40:35.000 You know, it rings true.
00:40:36.000 You hear a lot about it, you're wary of it, then you try it and you're like, this is me from now on.
00:40:40.000 It totally rings true. 0.99
00:40:41.000 You say the worst part about that movie is you could only see it for the first time once.
00:40:45.000 I am so envious of people who have never seen it before.
00:40:47.000 I was watching it with that in my head and I was like, you're absolutely right.
00:40:51.000 Frankly!
00:40:53.000 Alright, let's try to figure out if this is a fart.
00:40:57.000 This was on Conan.
00:40:59.000 Well, there I am meeting... I think Perry and I got into a fistfight at that particular screening.
00:41:04.000 Yeah, look, this is me fighting Perry.
00:41:07.000 Nice place.
00:41:09.000 Jimmy Kimmel, producer of Windy City Heat.
00:41:13.000 What a wonderful video that was that you sent last night to the podcast.
00:41:17.000 Thank you.
00:41:17.000 Thanks.
00:41:20.000 I feel like this whole thing has sort of got spiraled out of control when it was just a simple transaction that I'm just trying to
00:41:28.000 Just a pause here.
00:41:30.000 Perry's under the impression that I'm a billionaire producer, William Randolph Hearst III, WRH, and... 0.67
00:41:37.000 I paid him $50 to promote my movie, One Last Kiss or something, Tomorrow's Kiss, Yesterday, Goodbye, something like that, at the Sundance Film Festival, and he didn't do it, and I've been telling him I'm gonna kill him for stealing my money for many years!
00:41:53.000 And this is me finally confronting him, after sending him like 20 threatening videos.
00:41:59.000 If you have $50 in it right now, then we can settle this.
00:42:05.000 Perry, why don't you pay the $50 that you owe?
00:42:07.000 I gave you $50 to promote my film.
00:42:09.000 I don't have but more than three singles!
00:42:21.000 Who's in my film?
00:42:22.000 Like so many singles in my wallet. 1.00
00:42:23.000 I don't know any of that shit. 0.99
00:42:25.000 You don't have a problem remembering how to sue people or pretending to be a Java host. 1.00
00:42:30.000 You can get a wife. 0.75
00:42:31.000 Why aren't you baptized? 1.00
00:42:33.000 Why don't you cut your fucking hair, bitch? 1.00
00:42:36.000 Oh snap! 1.00
00:42:38.000 I have not seen this.
00:42:39.000 Save it! 1.00
00:42:41.000 Save it! 1.00
00:42:42.000 Save it for the Chili Cook Off! 1.00
00:42:44.000 Save it for the Chili Cook Off! 1.00
00:42:46.000 William Randolph Hurst is hurt.
00:42:47.000 That's mole almost breaking character right there.
00:42:50.000 You know what's funny?
00:42:51.000 So we sent, I sent videos of me boxing and he sent videos of him doing leg works out, workouts, just leg pushes and in that fight he kicked me and it actually was a very good kick.
00:43:00.000 Interesting.
00:43:01.000 Like it had some real, he got his foot on my chest and really gave it a thrust.
00:43:05.000 Yeah, yeah. 0.99
00:43:06.000 So throughout all of this stupid prank, his workout was effective. 0.99
00:43:10.000 Anyway, you see what I told you about Windy City Heat? 1.00
00:43:12.000 It just never stops.
00:43:13.000 It picks you up and it takes you away.
00:43:17.000 Alright, fart time.
00:43:18.000 Let's focus on the farts, please.
00:43:25.000 Focusing on the farts.
00:43:28.000 So anyway, let me explain.
00:43:29.000 I got to the studio early today and went in a hundred different K-holes and one of them was Conan O'Brien and Zach Galifianakis. 0.98
00:43:41.000 Zach Galifianakis is fascinating because he had this incredible career in 99.
00:43:48.000 Where he was going to be the face of VH1.
00:43:52.000 And there was one exec at VH1.
00:43:54.000 He's the guy who came up with the puppy bowl.
00:43:55.000 I forget his name. 1.00
00:43:57.000 But he goes, Zach Galifianakis is a fucking genius. 0.99
00:44:01.000 He's hilarious. 0.99
00:44:02.000 I'm talking about 99, remember?
00:44:04.000 20 years ago.
00:44:06.000 And he's going to be, he's going to not just be the face of VH1, he's going to be the face of youth culture across the world.
00:44:12.000 But I've got him now.
00:44:14.000 And I'm going to make him the face of VH1 and we're going to catch this rising star.
00:44:17.000 So he used to wear this hat, this Inca hat, you know, with the ear flaps, and he was on buses everywhere.
00:44:24.000 And it was a massive deal.
00:44:25.000 Of course, Ryan's Googling Puppy Bowl because that's how his brain works.
00:44:31.000 And the show aired and it was a complete catastrophe.
00:44:35.000 No one watched it.
00:44:37.000 I can't remember if it was funny or not.
00:44:39.000 I don't think I watched it.
00:44:41.000 And so that exec was fired from VH1.
00:44:44.000 Zach Galifianakis' career was over. 1.00
00:44:47.000 He's a fucking loser. 1.00
00:44:48.000 We got it wrong. 1.00
00:44:49.000 I thought he was something special.
00:44:51.000 So then the guy...
00:44:55.000 Then Zack just worked his way back up the line, doing comedy.
00:44:57.000 He doesn't really care about fame and success, as Between Two Ferns can tell you.
00:45:02.000 He doesn't really care about celebrities.
00:45:04.000 And he just worked his way back up.
00:45:05.000 He kept doing stand-up, he can play the piano, and he was like Owen Benjamin, and he just went back up, back up, back up, and then he became the star he is today. 0.98
00:45:12.000 So, the original dude, who put all his money in the Zack basket, now looks like a fucking super genius!
00:45:20.000 And I met him, he got me a show on travel, it was called America on $0 a Day, and then, I don't know what happened, someone got an email, the Soros globalists shut me down, and that was the end of his career again, and my show.
00:45:38.000 We were already doing the up-fronts for America on $0 a Day, like I was with Anthony Bourdain saying, welcome to Travel Network!
00:45:44.000 It was already, the pilot was okay, we were going through, and then there was some sort of,
00:45:49.000 Switch.
00:45:50.000 That's why I always say get fired, get in trouble, be brave.
00:45:52.000 Anyway, that was a very long tangent to describe how I feel every time I see Zach Galifianakis, but I was watching this and none of this is relevant to the fart clip.
00:46:02.000 I've watched this literally 30 times and I can't come up with an explanation.
00:46:10.000 It sounds like a fart.
00:46:13.000 Did you get the time code on?
00:46:14.000 I think it's before that.
00:46:37.000 There we go.
00:46:40.000 There we go.
00:46:45.000 Maybe it's Zach Galifianakis going... But his microphone sounds different.
00:46:49.000 Hold on.
00:46:50.000 So that's at 204.
00:46:51.000 Now listen to him talk.
00:46:52.000 Yeah, but he's not saying... You can't... That's apples and oranges.
00:46:56.000 Yeah.
00:46:56.000 So what do you think?
00:46:57.000 Well, the problem is a but...
00:47:08.000 Is very far from a mic. 0.99
00:47:12.000 And this sounds like the anal lips are touching the grid. 1.00
00:47:16.000 Of the microphone. 0.98
00:47:17.000 If you will.
00:47:17.000 Yes.
00:47:18.000 Is it maybe Andy, what's his name?
00:47:26.000 Richter?
00:47:29.000 I think it has to be a voice. 0.99
00:47:31.000 Okay here, I'll do my anal lips. 1.00
00:47:33.000 Okay, you got one? 1.00
00:47:34.000 Oh wait, no I don't.
00:47:35.000 Okay.
00:47:36.000 But I have a face. 0.99
00:47:37.000 So I'll do my anal lips where my anal lips are. 1.00
00:47:40.000 Oh, gotcha. 0.99
00:47:41.000 Okay.
00:47:41.000 Let's see how audible it is, right?
00:47:43.000 And I'll have a big one.
00:47:45.000 Okay.
00:47:46.000 You ready?
00:47:46.000 Yep.
00:47:50.000 No.
00:47:51.000 Lacks bass.
00:47:54.000 I'll do it loudest when I can.
00:47:56.000 Okay.
00:47:57.000 You're still not...
00:47:59.000 Does anyone know anyone who works at TBS?
00:48:01.000 Can you guys help me?
00:48:14.000 This is gonna be like a Bigfoot guy, like Sasquatch Hunters, where we try to, we talk about, I'm gonna do a documentary about this.
00:48:23.000 Yeah.
00:48:24.000 It all started when I was watching a YouTube video, and then it shows me outside TBS, can I talk to you please?
00:48:29.000 And you leave everything behind, you're like, I used to be into politics, very outspoken, opinionated.
00:48:34.000 Yeah, you won't have heard from me for a year and a half, and then it'll be like, McInnes re-emerges with a bizarre documentary about a
00:48:42.000 Well, about flatulence.
00:48:44.000 And then let's go to Cindy. 1.00
00:48:45.000 But it's your office just like with a bunch of like butts and farts and anal lips and diagrams. 0.99
00:48:51.000 I love that I have you saying anal lips now like it's a term. 0.99
00:48:53.000 Yeah, I don't like it. 0.99
00:48:54.000 I never liked it.
00:48:55.000 It sounds gross. 1.00
00:48:56.000 But it kind of looks like he's acting like he smells shit. 1.00
00:49:00.000 Besides maybe his children. 1.00
00:49:02.000 Yeah, his children do it.
00:49:03.000 Farts don't make it to your nose that fast. 0.98
00:49:05.000 It took balls, I thought, to be that... I mean, obviously he's in on the joke, but you were so... Starting to notice it. 0.96
00:49:11.000 He's like, um... Zach Galifianakis always acts like he smelled a fart.
00:49:17.000 That's kind of true, yeah.
00:49:17.000 He looks like he's in a fart at all times.
00:49:19.000 Anyway, speaking of farts... 0.98
00:49:26.000 I never really checked out Kyle Dunnigan before, but the guy is fucking funny. 0.97
00:49:32.000 I always knew him just as the Reno 911 guy. 0.92
00:49:36.000 But he did this fart video that is quality, as we say in Scotland.
00:49:41.000 Okay.
00:49:45.000 Wait, he's got a lot of videos that have the word fart in them?
00:49:47.000 There's a couple of fart ones. 0.99
00:49:50.000 His fucking impressions make you look like you have no talents as opposed to just one. 1.00
00:49:55.000 Like I look as burgers and diseases. 1.00
00:49:58.000 What?
00:49:59.000 And he has awesome things that aren't bad and contagious.
00:50:03.000 Now let me explain something.
00:50:04.000 The reason you have a job here is because you have one talent, impressions.
00:50:06.000 Right.
00:50:07.000 But his are so much better than yours that that one talent looks like you play guitar like me.
00:50:12.000 Well I play guitar awesome, so.
00:50:15.000 And I made a good song.
00:50:16.000 That was the intro, by the way. 0.95
00:50:18.000 This is not the video, retard! 1.00
00:50:43.000 This is good. 0.96
00:50:45.000 This is great.
00:51:00.000 Wait, you missed the punchline!
00:51:02.000 That concludes the end of this piece.
00:51:04.000 I hope you guys enjoyed it, but I also hope you realize this is not my usual content.
00:51:09.000 I pride myself on my sardonic take on a society that probably- Ow! 0.99
00:51:17.000 Did you ever have a fart that hurts your anal lips? 0.99
00:51:19.000 Yeah, yeah. 0.99
00:51:19.000 The slapping. 0.99
00:51:20.000 Those are amazing.
00:51:21.000 It just irritates it.
00:51:22.000 You know what I don't get about farts?
00:51:25.000 How are they so loud?
00:51:26.000 I don't know.
00:51:28.000 Like,
00:51:31.000 It's a lot of air, and it also... It implies your asshole's really tight. 1.00
00:51:37.000 It's either the tightness... Or... I mean, that's it. 1.00
00:51:42.000 Sometimes they can be this loud.
00:51:44.000 Hey! 0.99
00:51:46.000 Hi, how are you?
00:51:46.000 Now, you think of the technology that it takes for your larynx and all the little weird fish gills that are in your voice box to make, hello, how are you?
00:51:57.000 And then just some extra air in your butthole is just as loud? 0.98
00:52:01.000 Yeah. 0.99
00:52:01.000 It feels like a fart should be maybe this loud. 0.99
00:52:07.000 Like this, I would understand.
00:52:08.000 Yeah.
00:52:11.000 But, I like the ones that crack.
00:52:15.000 Or it's so loud that it's on Conan and we can get it through the mics? 0.99
00:52:20.000 By the way, gentlemen, if you're still married, which is rare, and you're in bed and your wife's asleep and you don't want to wake her up with a fart, every time you fart around your wife, a blowjob loses its wings. 0.99
00:52:30.000 So what you want to do is you want to make a sort of like a parrot beak with your fingers. 1.00
00:52:35.000 Go down to your anal lips. 1.00
00:52:38.000 Open them up as wide as you possibly can. 1.00
00:52:40.000 Wider than a homosexual after a three-day circuit party who's been doing meth. 1.00
00:52:45.000 Just like a baby yawning of an asshole. 1.00
00:52:47.000 And have it like... And then... Just exhale out your butthole. 1.00
00:52:56.000 Then it just sounds like you breathed or something. 1.00
00:53:01.000 Brothe, idiot. 1.00
00:53:02.000 Look at this one. 1.00
00:53:05.000 You're stupid. 1.00
00:53:06.000 Hit it! 1.00
00:53:12.000 That's a sassy fart. 1.00
00:53:14.000 Yeah, it was like, fuck you. 1.00
00:53:15.000 That guy's got fartitude. 1.00
00:53:17.000 You've heard of fortitude?
00:53:18.000 Yeah.
00:53:18.000 That was fortitude with a heaping dose of fartitude.
00:53:21.000 All right, before we give up on this guy and everyone thinks he's just an imbecile, show us his Bill Maher. 0.99
00:53:26.000 Oh, Lord. 0.99
00:53:27.000 His Bill Maher is so good.
00:53:29.000 No, that's it.
00:53:30.000 Where is that?
00:53:31.000 Is that Trump with Bill Maher?
00:53:33.000 Who's that Trump with?
00:53:34.000 No, that's the climate change girl.
00:53:36.000 Wait, let me see.
00:53:37.000 No, no, no, that's somebody else.
00:53:38.000 Well, I'll show his page.
00:53:39.000 Hated Trump with Bill Maher.
00:53:42.000 I'm sorry to bore you with this, folks.
00:53:43.000 We'll be taking calls momentarily.
00:53:45.000 God, I didn't even get to Gigi Gorgeous.
00:53:50.000 I overprepare for these shows.
00:53:52.000 We haven't shown the Trump thing yet!
00:53:55.000 What thing?
00:53:56.000 Oh, here we go.
00:53:58.000 This guy is so talented, it's disturbing.
00:54:01.000 This is a creepy thing.
00:54:02.000 Yeah, this is creepy comedy.
00:54:04.000 Okay, this is Green Eggs and Ham by Dr. Seuss.
00:54:07.000 I do not like green eggs and ham.
00:54:10.000 Oh, really?
00:54:10.000 He doesn't like rotten food?
00:54:11.000 What a shocker.
00:54:13.000 New rule. 1.00
00:54:13.000 If you crack open an egg and green shit comes out, don't put it in your mouth. 1.00
00:54:18.000 Put it in the fucking garbage. 1.00
00:54:20.000 Okay. 1.00
00:54:21.000 Okay.
00:54:21.000 I do not like them on a boat.
00:54:23.000 I do not like them on a goat.
00:54:24.000 I do not like that.
00:54:25.000 What the? 1.00
00:54:26.000 Who the fuck would eat food off a dirty farm animal? 0.99
00:54:29.000 And just FYI, if you don't like your rotten eggs... And no, that's not a computer program. 0.99
00:54:34.000 That's not an app.
00:54:36.000 Clearly the face is.
00:54:37.000 But that's not him putting his voice through a Bill Maher-ifier.
00:54:40.000 I've seen him do his Bill Maher on Rogan.
00:54:42.000 That's his Bill Maher.
00:54:43.000 Spooky.
00:54:44.000 You can close that guy.
00:54:45.000 We're not getting to that.
00:54:46.000 Yeah.
00:54:46.000 Okay.
00:54:47.000 Alright.
00:54:49.000 We're at 54 minutes.
00:54:51.000 I'm the bummer that's going to tell all the free people.
00:54:53.000 All right, you freeps. 0.94
00:54:54.000 That's our nickname for you, people who don't subscribe to freespeech.tv.
00:54:57.000 You're freeps.
00:54:59.000 You're like normies. 0.96
00:55:00.000 You're all noobs. 0.92
00:55:01.000 That's right. 0.84
00:55:04.000 My two sons call each other noobs.
00:55:07.000 I would say 80% of their back and forth involves being a noob.
00:55:11.000 Your two sons, Arizona?
00:55:12.000 Yeah.
00:55:13.000 And it works its way into every conversation.
00:55:15.000 Like, can I get some more coffee?
00:55:17.000 Oh, would you like some more Johnny is a noob?
00:55:20.000 All day, every day.
00:55:23.000 It was unfunny for a while and now I'm back.
00:55:25.000 Now I kind of like it.
00:55:26.000 Yeah.
00:55:28.000 Alright, we're saying goodbye to all the folks?
00:55:29.000 I'm a noob. 0.94
00:55:30.000 Anyway, so we're gonna get to this summation I did of Trump derangement syndrome where I peel back the three layers and it starts with nerds are mad.
00:55:40.000 Basically, the gist of this video I'm about to show you is that 0.99
00:55:46.000 Hate has no home here and all this, I hate Trump because he's a bigot. 0.97
00:55:49.000 That's all a lie. 0.98
00:55:51.000 And what it's really about is this hatred of pride.
00:55:56.000 This hatred of someone being unapologetically male.
00:55:59.000 This hatred of someone being proud of being American.
00:56:02.000 And...
00:56:03.000 Someone who refuses to say your little terms, your little words, like person of color or undocumented citizen of hard workers instead of anchor baby.
00:56:13.000 And these people who are mad at that are obviously the progenitors, they are the
00:56:19.000 The, um, the cheerleaders for political correctness and they are all in a conga line.
00:56:26.000 And this conga line is going off a cliff.
00:56:29.000 In fact, the lyrics to their little mariachi song is no borders, no wall, no USA at all.
00:56:36.000 And when someone isn't in their conga line, they scream racist Nazi, you're part of this rising thing of hate, they have these these cliches like racism is alive and well and blah blah blah.
00:56:46.000 And Trump was the first guy to say, no, I'm not getting in that conga line.
00:56:49.000 It's going off a cliff.
00:56:52.000 And that shocks people.
00:56:54.000 So I'm going to show you me explaining that concept in a very in-depth way using our green screen studio. 0.97
00:57:01.000 And then we're going to take calls, but you can't have that because you ain't paying my ass. 1.00
00:57:09.000 Fuck you, pay me! 1.00
00:57:11.000 So, thank you to our sponsors. 1.00
00:57:13.000 This wraps up the free episode, and we'll be continuing for another hour or so, taking calls, showing that video on freespeech.tv.
00:57:24.000 I like you more than a friend.
00:57:25.000 Get fired, get in trouble, be brave, and never stop fighting.