Get Off My Lawn - Gavin McInnes - August 27, 2019


S02E52 - ATTACK OF THE SUPER RASCALS


Episode Stats


Length

56 minutes

Words per minute

159.39377

Word count

9,027

Sentence count

1,002

Harmful content

Misogyny

82

sentences flagged

Hate speech

59

sentences flagged


Summary

Summaries generated with gmurro/bart-large-finetuned-filtered-spotify-podcast-summ .

Dr. Phil invites on his son's band, The Silent Epidemic, to perform their hit song, Doctor, and his wife can't believe her eyes when she first sees them. She can't even look at them.

Transcript

Transcripts from "Get Off My Lawn - Gavin McInnes" are sourced from the Knowledge Fight Interactive Search Tool. Explore them interactively here.
Misogyny classifications generated with MilaNLProc/bert-base-uncased-ear-misogyny .
Hate speech classifications generated with facebook/roberta-hate-speech-dynabench-r4-target .
00:00:08.000 I want you to know what I can do for you.
00:00:13.000 Live from New York, it's Get Off My Lawn with Kevin McGuinness.
00:00:22.000 You make me feel everyday That was Dr. Phil's son's band.
00:00:35.000 They were performing their smash hit, Doctor, which nobody's heard.
00:00:42.000 And it was a very romantic gesture that Dr. Phil did last Valentine's Day, I believe, where he said he's going to invite on his wife's favorite band.
00:00:53.000 And coincidentally, his wife's favorite band is his son.
00:00:58.000 That got the, what are they called?
00:01:02.000 Go back to the beginning.
00:01:03.000 She is acting, right?
00:01:05.000 Pretending that she's surprised and excited and cannot believe her eyes when she sees her son's band.
00:01:13.000 Her son's band.
00:01:16.000 The silent epidemics?
00:01:16.000 What?
00:01:18.000 Oh, no, no, no, no.
00:01:19.000 That can't be the name of them.
00:01:21.000 Well, go back to the beginning of the video.
00:01:22.000 Okay.
00:01:22.000 Because if you want to see some bad acting, check out his.
00:01:26.000 She's had so much plastic surgery. 0.99
00:01:28.000 She actually has a good argument for plastic surgery. 0.99
00:01:32.000 Because she looks better.
00:01:32.000 Her and Ozzy Osborne's wife, Sharon Osborne.
00:01:36.000 Turn it up.
00:01:38.000 Of all time, come on.
00:01:41.000 Come here, come here.
00:01:44.000 He should make a hand gesture for stop overacting.
00:01:48.000 Like, come here, come here.
00:01:51.000 Got it down the notch.
00:01:52.000 You're ruining her bit. 0.90
00:01:55.000 Okay.
00:01:56.000 As my Valentine's Day gift, I turned her.
00:01:59.000 Can't she see them anytime she wants?
00:02:02.000 Go to the practice space.
00:02:07.000 Just pause.
00:02:08.000 Look at her hands. 0.87
00:02:09.000 She's clearly in her 80s.
00:02:13.000 But she looks pretty good, right?
00:02:15.000 Like, I guess you can spend enough money that you make a pretty face.
00:02:20.000 Someone's built a face on top of her face. 1.00
00:02:24.000 I think without makeup, though, it looks like one of those model car kits without the paint before you paint them.
00:02:29.000 Or like a mannequin head that they have at a wig shop without the wig.
00:02:34.000 Just featureless.
00:02:35.000 Isn't that an interesting ring, too?
00:02:37.000 The first knuckle ring.
00:02:38.000 You've got me covering the ring.
00:02:40.000 Oh.
00:02:42.000 That's the ring.
00:02:42.000 No, no, no.
00:02:43.000 Oh, wait, she has a ring on her.
00:02:44.000 That was covered by the camera.
00:02:45.000 Can you flip the viewfinder?
00:02:48.000 What the hell?
00:02:49.000 It's like a little diamond bow tie on her fingernail.
00:02:53.000 Boy, women, no matter how much money you make, your wife will figure out a way to spend it. 1.00
00:02:59.000 You can make a billion dollars and your wife will empty your bank account. 1.00
00:03:04.000 She'll have a diamond bow tie toe ring that is $120,000.
00:03:10.000 What?
00:03:12.000 Look how shocked she is. 0.97
00:03:16.000 Let me introduce the hottest band tearing up the charts.
00:03:20.000 Hold on a sec.
00:03:20.000 Hold on a sec.
00:03:21.000 This band is 10 years old?
00:03:25.000 How can they be 10 years old?
00:03:28.000 How can Silent Epidemic be 10 years old?
00:03:31.000 I wonder if that's Mississippi, Australia.
00:03:34.000 Our son, Jordan.
00:03:37.000 Hit the name Jordan.
00:03:38.000 Oh, it's Hundred Handed is the name of the band.
00:03:41.000 Okay, can we hear it?
00:03:42.000 Hundred-handed.
00:03:43.000 Wait, hundred-handed?
00:03:45.000 Yes.
00:03:46.000 And his band, Hundred-Handed.
00:03:49.000 Just pause again.
00:03:51.000 What the hell does that mean?
00:03:53.000 Is that like under-handed, but hundred-handed?
00:03:56.000 I'm lost.
00:03:57.000 Nobody knows.
00:03:58.000 What a terrible name.
00:03:59.000 That's like rural juror.
00:04:02.000 Hundred-handed.
00:04:03.000 Yes.
00:04:05.000 It's also intolerant of the handicapped community.
00:04:09.000 Some people have one hand, and so the number would be 99-handed if they were in that particular group.
00:04:16.000 All right, keep going.
00:04:22.000 Look at that mom. 1.00
00:04:23.000 She can't even look at them.
00:04:24.000 She's so thrilled to be able to see her son.
00:04:28.000 She lives in LA.
00:04:29.000 They're an LA band.
00:04:30.000 They've been around for 10 years.
00:04:31.000 And this is Finnish.
00:04:32.000 Look at her.
00:04:33.000 She can't even stand.
00:04:37.000 Okay, just pause.
00:04:39.000 If you date outside of your race, you can always do better.
00:04:43.000 It's just a weird rule.
00:04:45.000 And it's not like a white-black thing in one direction. 0.56
00:04:48.000 It goes both ways.
00:04:49.000 If you're a black guy, you can get a white chick hotter than you could as a black chick. 1.00
00:04:54.000 If you're a white guy, you can get a black chick hotter than you could as a white girl. 1.00
00:04:57.000 You know what I mean?
00:04:59.000 Just switching races for some reason.
00:05:01.000 I don't know why.
00:05:02.000 Maybe they like the novelty of it.
00:05:03.000 Maybe you're special when you leave the community.
00:05:06.000 I knew a redheaded guy in Brazil who was born there, born and raised there, sort of like that boxer Canelo in Mexico.
00:05:14.000 And Jesus, it was like he was in the Beatles.
00:05:16.000 He just could not stop getting laid.
00:05:19.000 And that's just a redhead in Brazil. 1.00
00:05:21.000 So, dude, you don't, if you're going to go black, you can do eight. 0.99
00:05:28.000 This guy is like a 6.9, Dr. Phil's son.
00:05:31.000 And you're Dr. Phil's son.
00:05:33.000 So why is he with a five?
00:05:35.000 She's all right.
00:05:36.000 What do you think she is? 1.00
00:05:39.000 I don't know.
00:05:39.000 In this picture that I'm looking at here, let me pull this up.
00:05:43.000 Not looking too good.
00:05:46.000 This one.
00:05:47.000 Whoa! 0.71
00:05:49.000 Nice bangs.
00:05:51.000 Whoa! 0.71
00:05:51.000 He's got the Kimbra. 0.71
00:05:54.000 Yeah, not quite, I'm afraid.
00:05:57.000 The lighting is kind of weird here, Orion.
00:05:59.000 This side of my face looks super dark.
00:06:01.000 Uh-oh.
00:06:04.000 Is it conceivable that you would do a show where you wouldn't have a major error?
00:06:10.000 Is that better?
00:06:11.000 A little bit.
00:06:16.000 Yeah, and then let's just play some of this terrible shit.
00:06:20.000 If you're going to be a band, why bother?
00:06:23.000 If this is the music you're going to make, why bother?
00:06:25.000 It's sort of like if you're going to be a painter and you want to do landscape painting, like why make such generic, dull, useless pop?
00:06:34.000 We're doing fine for that.
00:06:39.000 Yay! 0.99
00:06:45.000 I want you to be able to do it.
00:06:47.000 She's still acting.
00:06:49.000 I can do it for you.
00:06:52.000 Maybe she lost him as a child to adoption, and this is the first time she's seeing her biological son.
00:06:59.000 Her son's baked Alaska?
00:07:03.000 She's been trying to get a hold of her son her whole life because she regrets it so much.
00:07:07.000 She's like, can I just talk to him?
00:07:09.000 She gave up her tech.
00:07:09.000 And he kept saying, no, I'm not interested.
00:07:11.000 I have a family.
00:07:12.000 And then today, Dr. Phil said, I found your biological son.
00:07:17.000 That would make sense.
00:07:21.000 I've been looking at my son that I saw this morning and I made scrambled eggs for.
00:07:25.000 Well, I think the thing that's inconceivable is that Dr. Phil would have his son on the show.
00:07:30.000 Like, it's probably pretty complex to have your own son on your own show, you know?
00:07:36.000 It's a pretty big feat.
00:07:38.000 By the way, they stole the riff.
00:07:42.000 He's doing that.
00:07:43.000 I know, I do, I know.
00:07:45.000 I hope that you be happy then.
00:07:48.000 I hope that you be happiness.
00:07:50.000 But this was last year, though.
00:07:51.000 I think that came out song.
00:07:52.000 You did.
00:07:53.000 Dude, Donnie.
00:07:56.000 So they stole from Hundred Hands?
00:08:00.000 Look at her stupid eyelashes. 1.00
00:08:01.000 Ugh.
00:08:08.000 That came out in 2018.
00:08:09.000 So it could be the same time.
00:08:11.000 That's why we had that terrible song.
00:08:14.000 We're yet to do Ryan's week.
00:08:16.000 Maybe we'll do that next week.
00:08:18.000 Maybe we'll do that tomorrow.
00:08:19.000 I'm just not looking forward to it so much.
00:08:21.000 Like, what's a song that you just can't stop thinking about that you'll always love and you're always happy when it comes on?
00:08:29.000 Man in the Box.
00:08:31.000 I already hate it.
00:08:31.000 I don't even know it.
00:08:32.000 It's by Alice in Chains.
00:08:34.000 You never heard of that?
00:08:34.000 Alice in Chains.
00:08:36.000 You know what our favorite joke was in the early aughts?
00:08:40.000 It was the No Rush joke.
00:08:41.000 We go, no, we go, what kind of music do you like?
00:08:44.000 Oh, you know, same thing everyone loves.
00:08:46.000 Early Jane, late Chains, Peppers and Rage.
00:08:49.000 So you are a joke.
00:08:51.000 I guess.
00:08:52.000 Early Jane, late Chains, Peppers and Rage.
00:08:55.000 No, Jane's addiction is terrible. 1.00
00:08:58.000 No, they're actually the best out of them.
00:08:59.000 No!
00:09:02.000 That's ghastly.
00:09:04.000 Wrong again?
00:09:04.000 You would say that.
00:09:05.000 That shoplifting song?
00:09:07.000 And a Bobby Man.
00:09:08.000 That's terrible.
00:09:10.000 No, it's not.
00:09:11.000 It's not good, dude.
00:09:12.000 You're not good.
00:09:13.000 Play your man in the box.
00:09:14.000 Let's end this argument with your terrible songs.
00:09:17.000 One rocks, the other one's like girly weird.
00:09:20.000 Literally, they were the entourage intro theme song.
00:09:23.000 Jane's Addiction.
00:09:24.000 Okay, no, don't look up Jane's Addiction.
00:09:26.000 Oh, you want Man in the Box?
00:09:27.000 I want Man in the Box.
00:09:28.000 So do I. It's a great song.
00:09:33.000 This is going to hurt.
00:09:34.000 Oh, it rolls.
00:09:36.000 By the way, while he looks that up, folks, today we're going to examine rascals.
00:09:40.000 The vehicles.
00:09:41.000 I think they're annoying.
00:09:43.000 They're often used, though, to execute vigilante justice in our society.
00:09:49.000 To literally put out fires, to stop fights, to punish people for attacking the weak.
00:09:56.000 So maybe they're good.
00:09:57.000 I'm going to go through some rascal footage with you live and we can figure it out together.
00:10:04.000 Because this is not like Tucker or other shows or Howard Stern or even Kumia where they have it all figured out.
00:10:11.000 I don't have it all figured out.
00:10:12.000 I'm a scientist.
00:10:13.000 So as we come through things, I'm open to mistakes.
00:10:17.000 And sometimes I don't know the answers.
00:10:18.000 So I want to work through it with you, the viewer.
00:10:21.000 I paid it.
00:10:23.000 While you cry.
00:10:33.000 This is like Van Alen if they had an enema.
00:10:37.000 You're taking everything out of good classic rock.
00:10:44.000 Slaps.
00:11:00.000 Is that what you have your hair in your eyes?
00:11:03.000 Yeah, I'm a rocker, man.
00:11:04.000 You want to be grunge?
00:11:07.000 By the way, I saw your mailbag, so I hadn't caught up with the.
00:11:10.000 You watched some of it.
00:11:11.000 I saw you watching some of it.
00:11:13.000 Very boring.
00:11:14.000 It's not good.
00:11:16.000 Sometimes I think, I go, my job's easy.
00:11:18.000 Anyone can do it.
00:11:19.000 And then I see you do it and go, maybe I'm talented.
00:11:21.000 That's why I did it.
00:11:23.000 To make me feel good?
00:11:24.000 To confirm that you...
00:11:28.000 This is the way it should go, Ryan.
00:11:30.000 I held back.
00:11:31.000 The letters are a place where the viewer gets his time.
00:11:35.000 You would take a letter and go off at a tangent about boring shows you're filming, like that Jeff the Chef, whatever the hell he's called.
00:11:42.000 And you talk about yourself.
00:11:43.000 And these are my things.
00:11:44.000 I like to see movies.
00:11:45.000 At one point, he says in Ryan's mailbag, which the pilot is a failure.
00:11:49.000 The show's not getting picked up.
00:11:51.000 But he goes, I like to see movies alone or with people.
00:11:56.000 And then I said, who cares?
00:11:57.000 So that kind of, that self-deprecation.
00:11:59.000 That's all valuable information that Ryan supplies on his mailbag show.
00:12:04.000 All right, let's get started.
00:12:07.000 Exciting time, especially in comedy, where I think the rich, rich comedians like Ricky Gervais, Jerry Seinfeld, Dave Chappelle, Eddie Murphy, comedians who can afford it are saying no to political correctness to this war on free speech.
00:12:27.000 And I understand that because as a comedian, you must go, all right, I can sit here and write a set that's acceptable and be scratching my head for two hours.
00:12:37.000 Or I can just say fuck it and take no prisoners and do the same comedy I've been doing for decades.
00:12:42.000 If I follow the first parameters, I'll be working on this comedy set for the next five years.
00:12:48.000 If I just do what I do, I used to go up on stage every night and just wing it and slay.
00:12:54.000 I think I'll just do that.
00:12:55.000 Fine, fuck it.
00:12:57.000 And Dave Chappelle has a new special out on Netflix, And the attitude is, fuck it.
00:13:02.000 And we saw recently we were talking about Jerry Seinfeld and Ricky Gervais, where he said, where is everyone the same?
00:13:07.000 And then Jerry Seinfeld goes, I don't know, China.
00:13:09.000 And then they spend the entire episode deciding whether they should leave that in or not.
00:13:14.000 And ultimately, they decide to leave it in because you and I have seen it.
00:13:18.000 So I sense that two groups of comedians are standing up to this war in free speech.
00:13:25.000 One is brand new comedians in New York, and I'm speaking specifically of Legionist Ganks.
00:13:31.000 Dave Smith, Louis J. Gomez, Kurt Metzger.
00:13:35.000 Ari Shafir.
00:13:36.000 I should be careful saying those two names together or they might have a fight in my sentence.
00:13:41.000 Comedians Kurt Metzger and Louis J. Gomez recently had a fight.
00:13:43.000 That's why I bring that up.
00:13:45.000 Ari Shafir, yeah.
00:13:46.000 A lot of that New York scene, stand-up New York, those guys have balls.
00:13:50.000 And it's probably because most of them have nothing to lose.
00:13:54.000 Similarly, guys who are so rich they can afford to lose, like Seinfeld and Gervais and Chappelle, have the same amount of balls.
00:14:02.000 Actually, they have smaller balls because you could fire Chappelle right now, and he's got enough for his grandchildren to be rich.
00:14:10.000 But it's still, it's an exciting time.
00:14:12.000 And I kind of knew this was coming because people don't care if you don't mess with their personal fun life.
00:14:19.000 So when they silence me or Laura Loomer, they go, I never really knew those two anyway.
00:14:23.000 But when you start attacking all of comedy, it's like attacking fast food or football, for example, this whole like concussions thing.
00:14:30.000 That's a war in America. 0.56
00:14:31.000 And if you attack football, your average American starts going, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, wait, wait, what?
00:14:35.000 What are we doing here?
00:14:37.000 And I think ruining Hollywood and ruining comedy and ruining food has made your average American go, all right, all right, I didn't really care before, but I love stand-up comedy.
00:14:46.000 That's, I love Eddie Murphy.
00:14:48.000 I used to listen to Steve Martin with my dad as a little kid.
00:14:50.000 You're not messing with that.
00:14:53.000 So, without further to-do, oh yeah, I just sent you this, right?
00:14:57.000 Woke joke police target comedian Dave Chappelle.
00:15:01.000 So in this, go back to that article.
00:15:04.000 In that article, it's about this LGBT thing.
00:15:08.000 What was the, was it at Vice?
00:15:10.000 Oh my God, it was my alma mater, Vice.
00:15:13.000 My people.
00:15:13.000 Yeah, terrible.
00:15:15.000 Jesus, my prodigy, my children.
00:15:17.000 I spawned this.
00:15:19.000 So back at the media empire that I spawned, they are criticizing Dave Chappelle's new set.
00:15:26.000 And one of the things, one of the jokes he has in it is he was doing a set and there was a rape joke in there.
00:15:31.000 And this woman leaves and he goes, where are you going?
00:15:33.000 And she goes, I'm sorry.
00:15:35.000 I was raped.
00:15:36.000 And he goes, well, you don't have to be sorry you were raped.
00:15:39.000 It's not your fault.
00:15:41.000 And then he goes, but it wasn't my fault either.
00:15:43.000 Ta-da! 1.00
00:15:44.000 That's very funny.
00:15:46.000 That's a funny rape joke. 1.00
00:15:47.000 People say you can't have a funny joke with the N-word in it or rape or Holocaust.
00:15:51.000 You can have a funny joke on any subject.
00:15:53.000 And it's usually benefiting the people it should.
00:15:58.000 Holocaust jokes tend to be a parody of anti-Semitism.
00:16:04.000 Like at a stand-up set in Tel Aviv, I heard a guy say, yeah, the Holocaust, unbelievable, horrible thing.
00:16:12.000 I mean, and people need to pay more attention to it.
00:16:15.000 I can't believe anyone would want to trivialize what they did to 300,000 people.
00:16:21.000 That's funny, and it's a parody of people who don't think 6 million Jews died. 0.97
00:16:27.000 Anyway, he also goes on in that article, they talk about how he said that you can't offend the alphabet people, meaning LGBT.
00:16:35.000 Go back to the bright one.
00:16:36.000 I'm sorry I'm itching my nose so much.
00:16:38.000 I've got allergies.
00:16:39.000 I've got my mustache twirling up into my nostrils, tickling me.
00:16:42.000 I apologize.
00:16:44.000 Go down.
00:16:46.000 Zoom in here.
00:16:49.000 Yeah.
00:16:50.000 Oh, yeah.
00:16:50.000 And then later on in the article, he says that he was doing a trans joke and everyone was laughing.
00:16:55.000 And they go, did you catch that?
00:16:58.000 No, go up.
00:16:59.000 You just had it.
00:17:00.000 Did you catch that part?
00:17:01.000 That part about Dave Chappelle only being interested in repairing his relationship with marginalized groups if he doesn't have to change anything about himself?
00:17:09.000 Whatever happened to changing, accepting people as they are?
00:17:12.000 That's a thing they do.
00:17:13.000 And you saw that Anna Kasparian did that with me when she saw me trying to get liberal guests on free speech.tv, which I'm doing, by the way.
00:17:20.000 Believe it or not, I've managed to continue post There is life after Anna Kasparian.
00:17:24.000 And we've got some doozy guests coming up in September.
00:17:29.000 I can't tell you that, though, because they will be harassed by the mob.
00:17:36.000 But this notion that when you get liberal guests, you're trying to repair your Nazi image.
00:17:40.000 And you go, no, I'm just continuing to be me.
00:17:43.000 So you call me a Nazi or a fascist or whatever the hell, a transphobe, and I just keep behaving like a normal human being.
00:17:49.000 And they go, oh, he's not acknowledging my criticism.
00:17:52.000 That means he's not willing to change.
00:17:54.000 Or when they see you doing something normal, they go, oh, he's trying to convince people he's changed.
00:18:00.000 And you're listening to them going, no, no, you just have the story wrong.
00:18:05.000 Like they see themselves as gods.
00:18:08.000 And when they dictate something, it's a dictum.
00:18:11.000 They're dictators.
00:18:12.000 And it has to be true. 0.64
00:18:13.000 And if someone doesn't comply, they're either in denial or they're desperately trying to comply.
00:18:21.000 They just can't see something for what it is.
00:18:25.000 They see someone, they go, he's gay.
00:18:27.000 Oh, he's having sex with a woman.
00:18:28.000 That's pathetic that he's trying to hide his gayness by having sex with a woman, that poor girl. 0.99
00:18:33.000 And you just go, I give up.
00:18:35.000 I give up on you.
00:18:37.000 Anyway, Dave Chappelle, here's a bit from Dave Chappelle's thing.
00:18:41.000 This was recorded with the phone by a friend of mine.
00:18:44.000 I'm not showing you the original.
00:18:45.000 I don't know why.
00:18:46.000 So I had to go to standards and practices.
00:18:48.000 They call me up.
00:18:49.000 I don't know why they're calling me, but I like the lady that runs the department. 1.00
00:18:52.000 She's usually really fair and was one of my favorite places.
00:18:55.000 So we talk about Chappelle show.
00:18:56.000 So she sits me down.
00:18:57.000 We have a nice conversation.
00:18:59.000 She tells me, oh, the sketches are great.
00:19:00.000 I go, oh, fantastic.
00:19:01.000 Well, then why am I here?
00:19:03.000 She said, because, David, there's no way that you can ever say the word fagot on our network.
00:19:15.000 I didn't know I did anything wrong.
00:19:16.000 I didn't try to defend myself.
00:19:17.000 I said, all right, fuck it.
00:19:18.000 I'll take it out.
00:19:19.000 Have a good afternoon.
00:19:20.000 And as I was leaving, it occurred to me, hey, hey, Renee, quick question.
00:19:26.000 Just a question.
00:19:27.000 I want to know, why is it that I can say the word nigger with impunity?
00:19:34.000 Great point.
00:19:39.000 So you're not allowed to say this.
00:19:43.000 But I can't say the word faggot.
00:19:47.000 And she said, because, David, you are not gay.
00:19:56.000 I said, well, Renee, I'm not a nigger either. 0.96
00:20:04.000 Oh, shit.
00:20:06.000 It's so good.
00:20:08.000 Do me a favor.
00:20:09.000 Wow.
00:20:09.000 Go back to that original article, the Breitbart one, and let's click on the vice thing.
00:20:15.000 And I want to see the author.
00:20:17.000 This is very important, folks.
00:20:19.000 Check the author.
00:20:21.000 You'll often realize that you are reading the writings of a babysitter, a child.
00:20:27.000 Now, let's see.
00:20:28.000 Yeah, I might have to just search for it.
00:20:30.000 Well, all you have to do, Ryan, here's how you do your job.
00:20:30.000 I don't know if they link it.
00:20:33.000 You take a quote from the poll quote that's in the article, you put that in quotes, and the vice article will appear.
00:20:42.000 Okay, it's called You Can Definitely Skip Dave Chappelle's.
00:20:45.000 Yeah.
00:20:45.000 Yeah.
00:20:46.000 It's written by Taylor Hosking.
00:20:48.000 Let's have a look at Taylor Hoskings.
00:20:50.000 Hoskins?
00:20:51.000 Hosking.
00:20:53.000 Hosking.
00:20:54.000 That looks like a fake name.
00:20:55.000 What about some of the other articles?
00:20:55.000 Yeah.
00:20:57.000 I looked into this, and the way that she wrote about this all-black sketch show, which is some shitty sketch show that, I mean, it's probably a wonderful show. 1.00
00:21:06.000 She used to write about children's cartoons and stuff a lot.
00:21:10.000 A lot of black woke stuff.
00:21:12.000 This is looking like a black woman. 1.00
00:21:14.000 Yeah, it is.
00:21:15.000 An eccentric black woman with a nose ring. 1.00
00:21:19.000 That sounds about right.
00:21:20.000 I'm feeling a nose ring on my horizon at my crystal ball.
00:21:24.000 I'm seeing kooky hair.
00:21:26.000 See, this show here that nobody's heard of, and this came out, I don't even know when.
00:21:31.000 Oh, this is 2019.
00:21:33.000 All right, just find her, please.
00:21:34.000 Don't do your own stuff.
00:21:36.000 As we learned from the mailbag show, Ryan, just Ryan is terrible.
00:21:42.000 Yes.
00:21:45.000 Don't do your own research, your own reporting, please.
00:21:50.000 Taylor Hoskins.
00:21:54.000 Yeah.
00:21:55.000 Okay, I'm even going to go farther and say that she has a white mom and a black dad. 0.99
00:21:59.000 The black dad was not around.
00:22:00.000 She's a hero of color.
00:22:01.000 And she was raised by her white mom. 0.99
00:22:08.000 She doesn't even have a full res picture out there.
00:22:10.000 That's a terrible picture.
00:22:11.000 There's no full res.
00:22:13.000 Did you put her in quotes?
00:22:15.000 This is her also.
00:22:16.000 Oh, she's there with Cornell West.
00:22:21.000 This is her in quotes.
00:22:22.000 Same results.
00:22:24.000 Yeah.
00:22:25.000 White Jewish mom, black husband, black husband not around.
00:22:32.000 And I used to have a theory that the reason that those kind of raised white black people are so radical is that their white friends go, can you not be like me?
00:22:43.000 I don't like it when you listen to NPR and play golf.
00:22:45.000 I want you to be Malcolm X. And we had a reader write it, a viewer write in and say, you're wrong, Gavin.
00:22:52.000 The real reason is other black people see them as a sellout for speaking normal.
00:22:57.000 And they say, you're not really black.
00:23:03.000 You're a sellout.
00:23:04.000 And so they feel so bad about their own voice that they change it and become radicalized.
00:23:04.000 You're white.
00:23:11.000 So it's to appease black people. 0.95
00:23:13.000 Whichever it is, you're not being yourself.
00:23:15.000 And it's weird.
00:23:16.000 What's that article that says things I'm the one about?
00:23:19.000 Yeah, what is that article?
00:23:21.000 Things Imagined?
00:23:22.000 What is that?
00:23:23.000 Let me see.
00:23:28.000 Oh, that's her Twitter page.
00:23:32.000 So she hates Dave Chappelle.
00:23:34.000 Have you noticed her cannibalizing their own? 0.98
00:23:35.000 Dave Chappelle's a liberal.
00:23:37.000 Dave Chappelle would never vote for Trump in a million years, but he's not woke enough.
00:23:42.000 Because, why?
00:23:44.000 Because he said, I did a tranny joke and a tranny liked it. 1.00
00:23:48.000 I did a rape joke and it was funny. 0.88
00:23:51.000 And he called LGBT the alphabet people.
00:23:56.000 And it's true, because LGBT is the shortest version possible. 1.00
00:23:59.000 No one says LGBT anymore.
00:24:01.000 Anyway, remember that video where they had the long one, like LGBTQRL, blah, blah, blah, blah.
00:24:08.000 And they had gays trying to figure out what the hell it was? 0.99
00:24:11.000 And like maybe one of them got it?
00:24:14.000 All right, let's check in on Michael Rappaport.
00:24:16.000 If you recall last week, Trump was in trouble for saying, what did he say?
00:24:24.000 He said, Jews who vote Republican are disloyal.
00:24:27.000 And what he meant was, we love you.
00:24:30.000 Our best interests, your best interests are with us, the right.
00:24:33.000 We're pro-Israel.
00:24:34.000 We're going to monitor radical Islam.
00:24:37.000 Why do you always vote Democrat?
00:24:37.000 You should like us.
00:24:39.000 Democrats don't give a shit about you. 0.51
00:24:41.000 Yet you almost, 78%, I think, of Jews outside of Orthodox Jews vote Democrat.
00:24:48.000 Actually, that'll be interesting to break up.
00:24:51.000 Don't talk about Jews voting as one bloc.
00:24:56.000 It should be Orthodox Jews and then liberal secular Jews. 0.75
00:25:00.000 Because I bet you Orthodox Jews vote, this is just my gut, 80% conservative, and I bet the opposite is true of secular Jews. 1.00
00:25:09.000 So to put those two together, you're really, it's an oil and water political statistic.
00:25:15.000 But Michael Rappaport, who I thought was Irish up until yesterday, did you know he's Jewish?
00:25:20.000 I didn't.
00:25:21.000 He's got an Irish vibe with his red hair.
00:25:23.000 Is he not an Irish Jew? 0.69
00:25:25.000 Oh, one of the three Irish Jews besides Louis C.K. No, Louis C.K. is a Mexican Jew. 0.83
00:25:30.000 Yes.
00:25:31.000 No, he's not Jewish, is he? 0.83
00:25:33.000 Whoa.
00:25:33.000 Yeah.
00:25:34.000 Didn't know that.
00:25:36.000 I have to know he's Catholic, dude.
00:25:38.000 He was raised Catholic.
00:25:39.000 Really?
00:25:40.000 Yeah.
00:25:40.000 Look it up.
00:25:40.000 It's in his show.
00:25:42.000 Because Jim Gaffigan is Catholic.
00:25:44.000 Huh.
00:25:45.000 Well, they can both be Catholic.
00:25:47.000 I know.
00:25:48.000 They can also eat bacon.
00:25:50.000 Why is he always talking about being Catholic?
00:25:52.000 Why is he Catholic? 0.91
00:25:53.000 Why is he Catholic? 0.91
00:25:54.000 I can't do that.
00:25:56.000 Okay, just play as the Michael Rappaport video, though.
00:26:01.000 Whoa.
00:26:01.000 Oh, way to go.
00:26:02.000 All right.
00:26:03.000 All righty then.
00:26:04.000 Show us one of your bushmarks.
00:26:05.000 Disloyal dick stain Donald Trump.
00:26:09.000 Keep the fucking Jews out your fucking mouth. 1.00
00:26:12.000 You don't speak on our behalf.
00:26:14.000 Just pause.
00:26:16.000 What is a dick stain?
00:26:17.000 I don't know, but is that like on your underwear when there's a little yellow area?
00:26:22.000 Or maybe it's a stain in the shape of a dick.
00:26:24.000 Or maybe it's a stain on your dick? 0.65
00:26:26.000 Maybe it's a stain that Andy Dick creates.
00:26:29.000 It's like a birthmark on your penis.
00:26:30.000 Is that what Donald Trump is?
00:26:32.000 Maybe.
00:26:32.000 Dick stain?
00:26:33.000 So does he speak for all?
00:26:34.000 Does he try to say shit stain, but without swearing?
00:26:36.000 Dick stain.
00:26:37.000 No, dick stain.
00:26:38.000 I don't think he's afraid of swearing.
00:26:39.000 Okay, go ahead.
00:26:40.000 Hey, don't try that divide and conquer shit with the Jews, okay? 0.98
00:26:45.000 We don't need you speaking on our behalf.
00:26:47.000 Okay, you and your tiny little hands and your baby little Schmeckle. 0.97
00:26:51.000 You fuck you.
00:26:52.000 I never saw you at Shabbat dinner.
00:26:54.000 I never saw you at cynic.
00:26:55.000 What is with people talking about dick size all the time?
00:26:59.000 A hand, dick?
00:27:00.000 I don't know.
00:27:00.000 You have a small dick.
00:27:02.000 Maybe he'd like them if he had a bigger piece.
00:27:04.000 Guys, drop the small dick thing, okay?
00:27:07.000 It's not a valid insult.
00:27:09.000 It's hurtful.
00:27:10.000 Women don't talk about penis size nearly ever. 1.00
00:27:13.000 And this idea that someone is compensating.
00:27:16.000 Oh yeah, you got a gun because you got a small dick. 0.99
00:27:18.000 That's what you're trying to compensate.
00:27:20.000 Yeah, they don't really say that about bloods and crips very often, do they?
00:27:24.000 Are they trying to compensate?
00:27:25.000 Are all the black gangbangers really just deeply embarrassed of their tiny little baby dicks? 1.00
00:27:30.000 Or NASA's created because of small dicks? 0.98
00:27:33.000 It's not a thing.
00:27:34.000 Just drop it.
00:27:35.000 As someone who is above average in length, it's embarrassing to hear everyone bitch about that.
00:27:41.000 Also, this incel thing, like, you can't get laid.
00:27:44.000 That's your problem.
00:27:45.000 I've seen people say that about me.
00:27:47.000 He's just bitter because he can't get any pussy. 1.00
00:27:49.000 I've been with my wife for 20 years now.
00:27:52.000 It's not, you've barked up the wrong tree.
00:27:54.000 Small dicks could be responsible for great, like the greatest achievements in mankind then.
00:27:58.000 China's got a billion people.
00:28:00.000 You just overcome.
00:28:01.000 They still work.
00:28:04.000 And if you put a yarmulke on the back of that hairpiece, it would slip slide off the back of your fucking head.
00:28:09.000 Remember Charlottesville when they were down there saying Jews will not replace us?
00:28:13.000 And you, you fuck, you said there's very fine people on both sides.
00:28:17.000 Get the fuck out of here.
00:28:19.000 Yeah, Michael, there was two things going on in Charlottesville.
00:28:25.000 One was the Jews will not replace us, guys versus Antifa. 0.91
00:28:28.000 There are no good people on both sides.
00:28:31.000 Do you think Trump thinks there's some good Antifa?
00:28:34.000 Obviously not.
00:28:35.000 Use logic, liberals.
00:28:37.000 I know you're allergic to logic, but try it.
00:28:40.000 So out of the Antifa and the Nazis, just like the commies and the Nazis in 1943, there are no good people. 0.85
00:28:47.000 That's right.
00:28:48.000 I never liked Stalin.
00:28:50.000 Similar, sorry.
00:28:53.000 Conversely, I guess?
00:28:54.000 Controversially?
00:28:55.000 No.
00:28:57.000 Controversially.
00:28:58.000 Contrapositally.
00:28:59.000 Don't interject ever.
00:29:03.000 Notwithstanding, there was another thing going on at that thing.
00:29:08.000 And I believe, by the way, the Nazis wanted you to think it was just statues.
00:29:12.000 So they made a statue thing and then at the 11th hour, switched it up and added the Nazi thing.
00:29:17.000 I didn't fall for it, despite what the fake news tells you.
00:29:22.000 There was also another demonstration going on simultaneously that was about statues.
00:29:27.000 Some people wanted the Robert E. Lee statue down.
00:29:30.000 Others thought it was glorifying slavery.
00:29:31.000 There was good people on those both sides.
00:29:35.000 Trump wasn't talking about Nazis and Antifa, clearly.
00:29:38.000 He would never say there are good Antifa.
00:29:40.000 In fact, he just said they should be labeled a domestic terror organization.
00:29:43.000 He was talking about the statue controversy.
00:29:48.000 Sometimes the people with the biggest voices are the ones the least informed.
00:29:52.000 The ones screaming keep it real the loudest are the ones the most full of shit.
00:29:56.000 KRS-1.
00:29:58.000 You don't speak on behalf of the fucking Jews. 0.71
00:30:00.000 You and your punk-ass, pussy-ass son-in-law, Jared Kushner.
00:30:05.000 Keep the fucking Jews out your mouth. 1.00
00:30:08.000 All right?
00:30:09.000 Dick Stane Donald Trump.
00:30:12.000 He looks like an old man. 0.50
00:30:14.000 Kneecap.
00:30:15.000 He's one color.
00:30:16.000 He looks like a kneecap?
00:30:18.000 His whole face is the same color besides his eyes.
00:30:20.000 Yeah, so am I. No, you're not.
00:30:22.000 That's why I wear these black hornroom glasses to give some sort of like eyebrows.
00:30:26.000 Your skin isn't gray.
00:30:27.000 Look at my eyebrows.
00:30:28.000 There's nothing happening there.
00:30:29.000 Oh, yeah, but your skin tone. 0.96
00:30:30.000 So we put this on here, and all of a sudden there's some sort of facial features.
00:30:33.000 Plus, glasses hide your like wrinkleness.
00:30:38.000 All right.
00:30:40.000 Before we get to the rascals, which is coming up, I want to talk briefly about Brett Stevens.
00:30:46.000 He is a free speech advocate who talks about the necessity of discomfort.
00:30:52.000 And he's right.
00:30:53.000 You should be made uncomfortable.
00:30:55.000 That's how your brain gets in shape.
00:30:57.000 We're in a mentally obese ethos.
00:31:00.000 We have people literally dying of mental obesity.
00:31:04.000 And I'm speaking about these nut Antifa who think they're fighting Nazis and end up killing themselves when they get caught and are facing prison term.
00:31:12.000 Snow, stop.
00:31:13.000 What are you doing?
00:31:15.000 Ryan?
00:31:16.000 Yes.
00:31:16.000 I said free speech and the necessity of discomfort.
00:31:19.000 You should probably go to the tweet that discusses free speech and the necessity of discomfort.
00:31:23.000 Right, so look at this.
00:31:24.000 So this is Brett Stevens writing about the importance of free speech.
00:31:29.000 Yes, I agree with you, Brett.
00:31:31.000 Now, by the way, because of that black and white and trans and Jewish intro, I'm obsessed with the ethnicity of everyone we talk about.
00:31:37.000 That's not good.
00:31:38.000 The left puts identity politics in your head, and then you have trouble getting it out.
00:31:43.000 Anyway, so this is Brett Stevens back before anyone insulted him.
00:31:48.000 And then someone called him a bed bug.
00:31:52.000 Free speech for me, but not for thee.
00:31:56.000 So he's discomforted by being called a bed bug.
00:32:00.000 And here's someone, you can never find this kind of stuff unless you get someone recording it with their phone on Twitter.
00:32:05.000 Here he is defending the fact that he wrote a long email to the professor and CC'd the professor's boss.
00:32:13.000 So he tried to get the guy fired for calling him a bed bug.
00:32:16.000 The New York Times had a problem with bed bugs in the building.
00:32:18.000 So a fun insult, just like calling Italians Frito, a fun insult for New York Times journalists is to call them bed bugs.
00:32:24.000 Because that's really what they are.
00:32:26.000 They're little turgid tattletales, as Greg Gudfeld described Brian Stettler.
00:32:31.000 And yes, CNN is bedbugs too.
00:32:33.000 Activate your Twitter account.
00:32:33.000 But go ahead.
00:32:35.000 Okay.
00:32:39.000 What that's buffering?
00:32:42.000 That shouldn't be buffering.
00:32:43.000 Yeah, no, the player is just very odd.
00:32:45.000 So if you put it in full screen, it behaves oddly.
00:32:48.000 Here we go.
00:32:50.000 Because there's a lot of buzz about this.
00:32:52.000 You deactivated your Twitter account after a controversy that involved someone calling you a name.
00:32:57.000 Would you like to comment on that?
00:32:58.000 Yeah, I'm going to be careful with my words because I know these are going to be examined carefully.
00:33:04.000 So I think Twitter brings out the worst in its users.
00:33:08.000 It tends to bring out the worst in its users.
00:33:10.000 And yesterday, a professor at George Washington University described me as a bed bug or a metaphorical bed bug just in the context of class.
00:33:21.000 He described me as a bed bug or a metaphorical bed bug.
00:33:25.000 So he didn't think you were literally a bed bug on some giant bed that would take up like Central Park.
00:33:32.000 Imagine how big a bed would have to be for him to literally be a bed bug.
00:33:37.000 You'd have to be nude on a giant blanket that was as big as Central Park.
00:33:42.000 Of course, it's a metaphorical bed bug, you bedbug.
00:33:47.000 I'm having a bed bug problem in our building.
00:33:50.000 I think that kind of rhetoric is dehumanizing and totally unacceptable no matter where it comes from.
00:33:57.000 Just pause.
00:33:58.000 I thought we had a necessity of discomfort.
00:34:01.000 All insults are dehumanizing.
00:34:05.000 You're a pig.
00:34:06.000 You're a cock.
00:34:07.000 You're a cunt. 1.00
00:34:08.000 You're a butthead.
00:34:09.000 You're a dick stain.
00:34:11.000 If you're a dick stain, you're not a person.
00:34:14.000 An ass. 0.97
00:34:15.000 Human garbage.
00:34:17.000 You're an ass.
00:34:19.000 Let's try to think of insults that aren't dehumanizing.
00:34:22.000 I guess stupid.
00:34:23.000 Bitch. 1.00
00:34:23.000 Jerk. 1.00
00:34:24.000 Jerk.
00:34:25.000 There's like seven.
00:34:26.000 Idiot.
00:34:28.000 That's still stupid.
00:34:29.000 Fool?
00:34:30.000 That's still stupid.
00:34:31.000 No, but there's other...
00:34:33.000 A fool is a fool.
00:34:34.000 As stupid is stupid.
00:34:37.000 We should change the name of the show to Suffers Fool Gladly.
00:34:42.000 Well, stupid isn't a noun.
00:34:44.000 It's a description.
00:34:45.000 It's an adjective.
00:34:46.000 But fool, that's a noun.
00:34:46.000 Correct.
00:34:48.000 So you're a stupid fool.
00:34:50.000 Okay.
00:34:50.000 Fair enough.
00:34:52.000 But you're not a bed bug.
00:34:53.000 I'd never dehumanize you because that's not acceptable.
00:34:56.000 Ever.
00:34:57.000 Thank you.
00:34:58.000 So I wrote him a personal email.
00:35:00.000 I didn't go to Twitter.
00:35:00.000 I wrote him a personal email, which I think was very civil, saying that I did appreciate it, that I would welcome him to come to my home in New York, meet with my family.
00:35:11.000 Just pop it.
00:35:12.000 Imagine someone calls you something as irrelevant as a bed bug, and you have to waste your whole family's time, and he has to leave his family to go to some meeting in probably Connecticut somewhere.
00:35:25.000 Jesus Christ, New York Times, you are all pussies.
00:35:30.000 Yes, that's a dehumanizing term.
00:35:32.000 You're worse than bedbugs.
00:35:34.000 You're pussies. 0.94
00:35:35.000 You're wimps.
00:35:36.000 You're losers.
00:35:37.000 You are the bourgeoisie.
00:35:39.000 Les bourgeoisie c'est comme la cuchant. 0.99
00:35:41.000 That Jacques Brel song is about you.
00:35:44.000 You suck.
00:35:46.000 You're a puss. 1.00
00:35:47.000 Which is South African for pussy. 0.98
00:35:49.000 You call me a bed bug to my face because a lot of things people say on social media aren't the things they're really prepared to say in one-on-one interactions.
00:35:58.000 I also copied his provost on the note.
00:36:01.000 People are upset about this.
00:36:02.000 I want to be clear.
00:36:03.000 I had no intention whatsoever to get him in any kind of professional trouble, but it is the case that the New York Times How is that for cognitive dissonance?
00:36:14.000 He CCs.
00:36:16.000 The provost is the professor's boss.
00:36:18.000 Fuck the police's boss.
00:36:19.000 He CC's the professor's boss and said, I had no intention of him getting in any kind of professional trouble.
00:36:27.000 Well, then why'd you CC him?
00:36:29.000 Well, because I thought the provost should be aware of how the professors are behaving.
00:36:34.000 That's such a shitty lie.
00:36:36.000 It's the kind of shitty lie a loser pussy like Brett Stevens would spew. 0.99
00:36:42.000 And it's insulting because the fact that he expects us to believe shit like that, fuck you.
00:36:48.000 This is a level of stupidity that's insulting to the viewer.
00:36:53.000 Times in other institutions that people should be aware, managers should be aware of the way in which their people, their professors or journalists, interact with the rest of the world.
00:37:05.000 That's certainly the case with me at the New York Times.
00:37:10.000 My editors are always aware of what I'm saying, and I've sometimes been called to account rightly so.
00:37:16.000 Ethan posted my email on Twitter, so people are free to go and look at what I had to say.
00:37:22.000 All I would say is that using dehumanizing rhetoric like bed bugs or analogizing people to insects is always wrong.
00:37:31.000 We can do better.
00:37:32.000 We should be the people on social media that we are in real life.
00:37:35.000 Says who? 0.65
00:37:36.000 Says who? 0.65
00:37:37.000 What the hell?
00:37:37.000 Yeah.
00:37:39.000 You should always behave exactly as you do in real life.
00:37:42.000 So you should talk about everything that he writes about in real life.
00:37:45.000 The necessity of discomfort.
00:37:47.000 Doesn't that just sum it up?
00:37:51.000 They want to tell us how to live our lives, but when they experience a billionth of what we get, they have a heart attack.
00:37:57.000 Look at the violence talk.
00:37:59.000 The courts, the DA finds every single reference that I have to violence, takes out the self-defense part, changes people in quotes so you get to say that I said Barack Obama was a monkey.
00:38:12.000 Everything is violence, violence, violence.
00:38:13.000 And then it appears in court and these guys are facing nine years.
00:38:16.000 The left is constant violence.
00:38:19.000 That chick, oh, she's at MSNBC. 1.00
00:38:22.000 She's the one who said that Sarah Huckabee Sanders should never feel safe.
00:38:26.000 Reuben is her name.
00:38:27.000 She was saying that Trump supporters aren't even human recently on MSNBC and they should be terrorized, what was it, for the rest of their lives?
00:38:37.000 Do you remember this?
00:38:39.000 Deserves a life sentence.
00:38:40.000 Yes, she said Sarah Sanders deserves a life sentence. 1.00
00:38:43.000 So harass her constantly.
00:38:44.000 But recently, if you look her up by searching.
00:38:47.000 I do think there's one point that they miss, however, and that is you have to do what is most effective.
00:38:56.000 What are you doing?
00:38:57.000 We've got the Sarah Huckabee Sanders thing. 1.00
00:38:59.000 I want the new Jennifer Rubin. 1.00
00:39:01.000 I've never seen that.
00:39:03.000 I know you haven't seen anything.
00:39:04.000 Yeah, but some people out there's got that.
00:39:06.000 All right, so her name is Ruben, Jennifer Rubin.
00:39:09.000 Just Ruben.
00:39:10.000 And then just hit news.
00:39:11.000 Ruben MSNBC News.
00:39:14.000 Boy, isn't it fun you guys get to watch an internship?
00:39:17.000 Here we go.
00:39:18.000 Wait, go back to the headline.
00:39:21.000 Only way to purge GOP is to burn down the Republican Party with no survivors.
00:39:28.000 Is that not perchance smidge violent?
00:39:32.000 That kind of talk?
00:39:33.000 Call me kooky.
00:39:34.000 Seems a little harsh.
00:39:37.000 Anyway, yeah.
00:39:40.000 They get to talk like that, but we can't talk like that.
00:39:43.000 Well, that's not how it works, folks.
00:39:45.000 That's not fair.
00:39:46.000 But speaking of fairness, I think it's very important that we deeply examine examples of people using rascals to, what's the word I'm looking for?
00:39:57.000 Inflict justice on the populace.
00:40:00.000 Let's go now to Attack of the Super Rascals. 1.00
00:40:04.000 I'll be your doctor.
00:40:08.000 You'll be my doctor.
00:40:09.000 You'll be mine.
00:40:11.000 You'll be mine.
00:40:19.000 What is it with these gigantic fat pigs and their rascals?
00:40:23.000 First of all, if you're so fat that you need a rascal to get around, the last thing you need is a rascal to get around.
00:40:32.000 If you have trouble walking, walk more.
00:40:36.000 It doesn't apply to everything.
00:40:38.000 If you have trouble seeing, I'm not going to say see more.
00:40:41.000 If you have trouble breathing, I'm not going to say breathe more.
00:40:44.000 But when it comes to walking, the more walking you do, the easier it is.
00:40:48.000 And the worst thing you can do for someone who is so fat they can't walk is give them something where they don't have to walk.
00:40:54.000 They're going to get fatter and they're going to need more rascal. 0.91
00:41:00.000 So there's a phenomenon going on with these rascalites, the super rascals we call them, where they think they can kick ass and take names.
00:41:08.000 And I think it might have to do with you're driving around, you want to go over there.
00:41:14.000 When I want to go over there, I have to go do, doot, doot, doot, doot, doot, doot.
00:41:17.000 That takes some effort.
00:41:18.000 They just, the slightest tweak of the wrist and they're over there.
00:41:23.000 And the next thing you know, they think they're transformers.
00:41:26.000 And they're just going.
00:41:30.000 So let's look at some examples of these people who think being a fat pig on a mobility scooter is a superpower.
00:41:40.000 All right, so this one in the black dress is problematic.
00:41:43.000 She's instigating the fight, making kids cry, saying, kill that bitch. 1.00
00:41:47.000 Someone needs to take care of her. 0.96
00:41:49.000 Get her out of here. 1.00
00:41:51.000 Super rascal.
00:41:53.000 Thanks the day.
00:41:54.000 Thanks the day.
00:41:59.000 I mean, in that sense, it was probably good that she showed up to break it up.
00:42:03.000 What's the next one you got?
00:42:06.000 Because there's a couple of those.
00:42:07.000 The Australian 60 Minutes one.
00:42:09.000 Oh, no, this is good too.
00:42:10.000 We've already shown this on the show, but it's important that we have a thorough compendium of all of these rascal day savers.
00:42:18.000 So this is an incompetent fire lady who's not strong enough or doesn't know enough about physics to get that off that thing. 1.00
00:42:25.000 So she goes... 0.56
00:42:32.000 So we're just going to put it out.
00:42:34.000 If everybody can help me out, whoa, whoa, whoa!
00:42:37.000 I'll help you put it out.
00:42:42.000 Look, it actually ends up surrounding the thing for a little bit there.
00:42:47.000 Can you go back a bit?
00:42:48.000 When he first runs it over, he subsumes the hula hoop.
00:42:53.000 Like, it becomes him.
00:42:54.000 No, no, it's okay.
00:42:57.000 Somehow he defies physics behind that car, and then it goes through him.
00:43:02.000 Maybe they are magic.
00:43:03.000 Maybe they do have superpowers.
00:43:05.000 So anyway, she puts it out the normal way, which is with big fat black clots, not the super rascal way, where you just drive the fire away.
00:43:15.000 But see if you can dig up the Australian 60 Minutes one, which is another thing we've already had on the show.
00:43:19.000 I'm sorry to repeat myself here.
00:43:21.000 But after Lara Logan was gang raped by Arabs, another blonde 60 Minutes, this time it was Australia, thought, I know, let's go confront some Muslims. 1.00
00:43:34.000 Let's go confront some refugees. 1.00
00:43:36.000 And that'll probably go way better than it did for Lara Logan.
00:43:40.000 They'll probably treat me with tons of respect.
00:43:42.000 Remember how this went?
00:43:43.000 And as we prepare to go, young men masking their faces arrive.
00:43:50.000 Good, good, good, good.
00:43:51.000 You're doing good.
00:43:52.000 Australians can fight.
00:43:55.000 Be careful.
00:43:56.000 And attack.
00:43:57.000 Go! 0.95
00:43:58.000 Feel free!
00:43:59.000 Go! 0.95
00:44:01.000 He lost his focus there.
00:44:05.000 Don't you punch.
00:44:06.000 Ooh, we got a punching.
00:44:06.000 Excuse me.
00:44:08.000 Please, please, please.
00:44:10.000 Get out of here.
00:44:11.000 No, no, we are leaving.
00:44:14.000 This isn't stockpiled.
00:44:16.000 You see the rascal there for a second.
00:44:23.000 The gang's attention turns when a local intervenes and drives his mobility scooter into the most violent attack.
00:44:32.000 Wait a minute.
00:44:34.000 I'm changing my mind here.
00:44:36.000 I'm starting to realize that these guys are saviors.
00:44:39.000 They do save the day.
00:44:41.000 I mean, we've seen nothing but good so far, right?
00:44:44.000 We had the woman who took care of that big black lady who was instigating a fight. 1.00
00:44:48.000 We've got the refugee one. 1.00
00:44:50.000 And then what was the one we just saw?
00:44:53.000 The fire.
00:44:53.000 The fire.
00:44:54.000 The guy put out a fire.
00:44:55.000 So I'm sorry.
00:44:56.000 Sometimes we learn together here.
00:44:58.000 So far, out of the, I think we have six of these videos, three of them are people creating justice in the Western world.
00:45:08.000 Oh, now this one.
00:45:09.000 Look how many people own this video. 0.97
00:45:11.000 FreeSpeech.tv is branded it.
00:45:13.000 And WorldStar Hip Hop and Little Havana.
00:45:16.000 Now, this is an example of a middle-aged woman who just compresses a man for calling her mother a bitch. 1.00
00:45:24.000 Yo, don't get involved.
00:45:25.000 Wait, no, no, go back to the beginning.
00:45:28.000 You're at the end there.
00:45:30.000 Go to the very beginning.
00:45:32.000 It starts out, she's got him.
00:45:33.000 But she's got him in a real grip.
00:45:37.000 He's compressed.
00:45:38.000 She's shrinking him.
00:45:42.000 She's turning him into a panini sandwich. 0.69
00:45:49.000 Don't call her mother a bitch. 1.00
00:45:50.000 Very simple.
00:45:54.000 I like how we're not calling the cops too.
00:45:56.000 just handling it.
00:46:04.000 Oh, and then she gets some wallops in. 1.00
00:46:08.000 Yo, don't get involved.
00:46:10.000 Boy, 45-year-old women sure are strong in Miami. 1.00
00:46:16.000 Oh, she gets another nice kraken. 0.60
00:46:20.000 You know, genetically, it's kind of looking like your mom is a bitch. 1.00
00:46:24.000 Because you sure are.
00:46:28.000 All right.
00:46:29.000 Now, so we've covered the ones we've already covered.
00:46:32.000 Now let's look at...
00:46:35.000 It looks like they're in Britain, right? 0.88
00:46:38.000 Dames Workshop.
00:46:40.000 So those two, just stop, stop, stop.
00:46:42.000 I want to ruin the surprise.
00:46:44.000 So these two old ladies right here, they're annoying. 1.00
00:46:48.000 And you know, when you're downtown, especially in Britain, and there's some old lady running her mouth or the big stupid grocery bag, blah, blah, blah. 0.92
00:46:57.000 And you just think, get these bitches out of here. 1.00
00:46:59.000 Well, guess who's here to save the day?
00:47:02.000 Some other bitch on a rascal. 1.00
00:47:06.000 Boom.
00:47:08.000 Oh, my God.
00:47:10.000 Sorry to laugh.
00:47:11.000 Add a boom. 0.54
00:47:13.000 She just piles them up. 0.61
00:47:15.000 And she's, is that a guy?
00:47:17.000 I think it's a guy.
00:47:18.000 Yeah, it's a young man.
00:47:20.000 Why did he do that?
00:47:22.000 What was the impetus?
00:47:23.000 So out of the six here, the first three were clear examples of justice.
00:47:28.000 The fourth one, well, he called the mom a bitch. 1.00
00:47:32.000 She was compressed, panini style. 0.68
00:47:34.000 Sure.
00:47:35.000 Fifth one, we're going to have to be ambiguous about.
00:47:37.000 We don't know the situation.
00:47:39.000 I highly doubt you can think of a scenario where two old ladies deserve to be stacked like body bags. 1.00
00:47:46.000 What are they saying, Gran Torino?
00:47:48.000 We used to stack you gooks like sandbags in the war. 1.00
00:47:53.000 So I don't think, I don't, I can't think of a scenario where a geriatric old lady deserves to be treated like a sandbag. 1.00
00:47:59.000 But in this scenario, we have people fighting back.
00:48:04.000 Whatever you think about rascals, this is for people who are mad at them.
00:48:09.000 So this is the final anti-rascal video.
00:48:12.000 Now, when we came up with this concept, we hadn't ironed it out that much, clearly.
00:48:15.000 And we thought it'd be a bunch of examples of people and rascals being dicks.
00:48:19.000 And then it ends with revenge.
00:48:21.000 But we don't really, we have one maybe example of someone being a dick and a rascal.
00:48:26.000 But anyway, here is some revenge.
00:48:29.000 What's on her left hand? 0.85
00:48:33.000 Can you turn it up?
00:48:35.000 So he's blocking her in.
00:48:40.000 Oh! 0.60
00:48:43.000 Now wait a minute.
00:48:44.000 Just pause.
00:48:45.000 If this person is sincerely paralyzed, then he'd be like a turtle right now, unable to get up, right?
00:48:51.000 Let's see how paralyzed he is.
00:48:57.000 That's it.
00:49:01.000 I scooted! 0.90
00:49:03.000 I scooted! 0.90
00:49:06.000 You did!
00:49:08.000 He literally said, my precious scooter.
00:49:11.000 And where'd the wheels go?
00:49:12.000 They just vanished.
00:49:14.000 Oh, that's the front wheels right there.
00:49:16.000 You turned!
00:49:18.000 I've come to police!
00:49:20.000 You're going to jail!
00:49:24.000 Look, I don't care if they're vigilantes fighting for justice.
00:49:28.000 I don't care what the background is.
00:49:30.000 I hate people on rascals because they symbolize everything wrong with society today, and that is obesity, greed, sloth, laziness, and a sense of self-importance that is not deserved.
00:49:44.000 I'll be a doctor.
00:49:50.000 Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh You know what?
00:49:53.000 If you want, oops, here's all a skew.
00:49:56.000 If you want that song in your life, if you want to listen to that song when you're cleaning your room or something, you don't like music, so turn it off.
00:50:05.000 Got to trust your instincts sometimes.
00:50:06.000 I knew rascals were bad.
00:50:08.000 I knew I don't like the people in them.
00:50:11.000 If you were paralyzed, you'd be in a wheelchair.
00:50:14.000 Rascals, by definition, mean I don't deserve this.
00:50:17.000 And holy shit at Disneyland, were they chalk a block?
00:50:21.000 I told you I kept wanting to go up to them and go, hey, my father has multiple sclerosis.
00:50:27.000 What's your impairment?
00:50:28.000 Because he has a similar rascal that he rides around in.
00:50:31.000 Does it hurt your spina bifida?
00:50:32.000 Oh, sorry, what is your impairment?
00:50:35.000 I guarantee you if I did that, and I didn't have the balls to do it, 100% of the time they wouldn't have a real problem.
00:50:42.000 They'd just say, oh, my knees hurt if I walk too much.
00:50:44.000 The knees, yes.
00:50:45.000 Because I'm too fat.
00:50:48.000 Speaking, by the way, this is someone who has not boxed for all of August.
00:50:52.000 I've become a fat fucking pig again.
00:50:56.000 I must weigh 200 pounds.
00:51:00.000 You become a double FP.
00:51:01.000 The doctor asked that today.
00:51:03.000 A double FP, fat fucking pig? 1.00
00:51:04.000 Yeah.
00:51:05.000 He said, how old are you?
00:51:05.000 And I mean, how much do you weigh?
00:51:08.000 And I said, probably 200 by now.
00:51:10.000 And then he proceeded to blast my ear trying to get the wax out for an hour and a half to no avail.
00:51:17.000 It's still in there.
00:51:18.000 I cannot hear anything out of this ear.
00:51:20.000 And you know what he ended up giving me?
00:51:21.000 This is after I've already done a prescription of drops.
00:51:24.000 A stool softener.
00:51:28.000 And I went to the pharmacy and I said, they go, there's a mistake here.
00:51:33.000 This is not.
00:51:34.000 And it's over the counter too, so I don't know why you're here.
00:51:37.000 And I said, oh, I didn't know it was over the counter, but I'll be there.
00:51:41.000 Wait, are you going to show a video of impacted wax?
00:51:44.000 Oh, it's cool.
00:51:45.000 They got a camera in there.
00:51:46.000 Yeah.
00:51:48.000 That's the situation I'm like now.
00:51:49.000 Oh, gosh, dude.
00:51:51.000 Yeah, I hate that when your ears don't pop.
00:51:53.000 I even hate that.
00:51:54.000 But do you feel it physically or just impaired?
00:51:56.000 It's just like I have one ear plug in.
00:51:58.000 That's awful.
00:51:59.000 It sucks.
00:52:01.000 Is that disgusting to you?
00:52:02.000 No.
00:52:03.000 That's not a butthole. 1.00
00:52:04.000 It's like amber.
00:52:06.000 It doesn't bother me.
00:52:09.000 Wait, this is going to get way more disgusting.
00:52:11.000 Yeah, that's why girls love watching this type of stuff. 0.99
00:52:16.000 This type of stuff?
00:52:17.000 They all love pimple popping. 0.60
00:52:17.000 Yeah. 0.60
00:52:17.000 Why do they love it? 0.60
00:52:19.000 Name one girl who ain't like pimple popping. 0.99
00:52:20.000 Oh, man.
00:52:22.000 This lucky bastard.
00:52:24.000 Yeah.
00:52:24.000 Yeah, for real.
00:52:25.000 Dude.
00:52:26.000 So what go to your doctor?
00:52:27.000 What's going on with yours?
00:52:29.000 You can't.
00:52:29.000 I don't know.
00:52:30.000 It's kind of like smeared.
00:52:34.000 I don't like showing disgusting stuff.
00:52:35.000 I don't find this particularly disgusting.
00:52:37.000 No, it's not.
00:52:37.000 Oh, my God.
00:52:38.000 This guy's going to walk out of there.
00:52:39.000 He's going to hear car tires, birds like a block away.
00:52:43.000 Holy shit.
00:52:43.000 This is the biggest one I've ever seen.
00:52:45.000 Dude, maybe this is disgusting.
00:52:47.000 It's like a date.
00:52:48.000 It looks like a little date.
00:52:50.000 It's got something in it.
00:52:51.000 It's like a peanut.
00:52:53.000 Did this imbecile put a peanut in his ear?
00:52:57.000 I'm pretty sure he didn't.
00:53:00.000 It's like a mosquito and sap.
00:53:01.000 It's like white on the inside.
00:53:02.000 Like in Jurassic Park.
00:53:03.000 Dude, did you put a peanut in your ear?
00:53:06.000 That'd be funny if you were a doctor who was funny.
00:53:09.000 Dude, is this a peanut?
00:53:10.000 Look at me.
00:53:11.000 Did you put a peanut in your ear?
00:53:12.000 He does a sleight of hand, he eats it, pretends.
00:53:14.000 That can't just be wax.
00:53:16.000 I don't know.
00:53:16.000 Looks like two bones in there.
00:53:19.000 That's got to be something else.
00:53:21.000 I think that dummy put something in his goddamn ear. 0.91
00:53:25.000 Anyway, find that doctor.
00:53:26.000 I don't care if he's in Singapore.
00:53:28.000 I'm going there.
00:53:29.000 You could afford to do that.
00:53:30.000 That is kind of fun.
00:53:31.000 Dr. Paul.
00:53:32.000 Two weeks.
00:53:33.000 Yeah, it's bad.
00:53:34.000 And I do a show where my co-host, engineer guy, is on to my left.
00:53:39.000 Right.
00:53:43.000 For the live show?
00:53:44.000 It was okay.
00:53:45.000 Do you feel more tuned into it, like your own voice, too?
00:53:48.000 No, and why did you wear headphones when you did the mailbag?
00:53:51.000 Because I need to hear my elements, my sound.
00:53:53.000 I got to make sure the sound's right.
00:53:55.000 What?
00:53:55.000 Because if it, let's say it's coming through the speaker, but the speaker's loud.
00:53:58.000 Now I don't know what the people at home are hearing.
00:54:00.000 That's not what it's being recorded as.
00:54:02.000 So for too long, the people have been hearing bad audio, frankly.
00:54:10.000 We're out of time.
00:54:11.000 I just wanted to get to the rascals.
00:54:12.000 That was the important thing.
00:54:13.000 But as always, we'll do Mailbag tomorrow, and tomorrow we'll do a fun Antifa update.
00:54:18.000 Tomorrow will be the Antifa show.
00:54:20.000 I just want to show you one of the worst fights ever, and I believe it's in my hometown of Glasgow, Scotland.
00:54:26.000 So it's disappointing because that is the fight capital of the world.
00:54:29.000 But these guys cannot throw punches.
00:54:31.000 These are some of the worst punches I've ever seen.
00:54:34.000 Turn it up.
00:54:36.000 I've noticed there's a lot of, what are you going to do?
00:54:38.000 Come on, hit me. 0.99
00:54:39.000 And then the guy does.
00:54:41.000 He's got these long, sort of like lancing jabs that don't, they're not going to land.
00:54:47.000 It's almost like they're pushes, but with a fist on the end.
00:54:50.000 I feel like you could stand in front of them and not be hurt.
00:54:53.000 Whoa.
00:54:55.000 That was a cool twirl from the old man.
00:55:00.000 He's peppy.
00:55:04.000 See, it's pushing.
00:55:11.000 And the other guy's never been in a fight either.
00:55:13.000 How could you never have been in a fight in Glasgow?
00:55:17.000 Maybe times have changed over there, huh?
00:55:19.000 Yeah.
00:55:23.000 I turn back!
00:55:25.000 Just walk away, I know where I turn back!
00:55:30.000 He's kind of got like your brother's build.
00:55:32.000 Yeah.
00:55:32.000 No, he's a little fatter than...
00:55:36.000 Kyle's just solid.
00:55:40.000 He's definitely got some sort of boxing-ish moves.
00:55:44.000 It's probably just from watching.
00:55:45.000 Get a waste of my time.
00:55:48.000 Look at those punches.
00:55:50.000 Those are girl punches. 1.00
00:55:51.000 Hammer fist, yeah.
00:55:52.000 Smack down?
00:55:52.000 It's like what a baboon does.
00:55:59.000 Did we already see his belly?
00:56:01.000 Yeah.
00:56:04.000 So he keeps going.
00:56:06.000 He's about to pick up a dead pigeon and throw it at the guy, which I've never seen before.
00:56:11.000 There we go.
00:56:12.000 Oh my god.
00:56:15.000 Wow, I did not see that coming.
00:56:17.000 I know every fight you want it to end with a knockout, but a dead pigeon will do.
00:56:24.000 Get fired, get in trouble, be brave, and never stop fighting.
00:56:34.000 Put this on and wait for me.
00:56:36.000 I'll check you out from head to feet.