Get Off My Lawn - Gavin McInnes - September 03, 2019


S02E54 - BILLIONAIRE MICHAEL SCOTT


Episode Stats


Length

1 hour and 6 minutes

Words per minute

161.30106

Word count

10,662

Sentence count

1,168

Harmful content

Misogyny

45

sentences flagged

Hate speech

65

sentences flagged


Summary

Summaries generated with gmurro/bart-large-finetuned-filtered-spotify-podcast-summ .

Kevin and Ryan are back in New York celebrating Ryan's win at the Grammys. They talk about Ryan's new music video for "Round and Round" and what it means for the future of music on YouTube. Plus, a story about a man who thinks he can sing a song that nobody else can.

Transcript

Transcripts from "Get Off My Lawn - Gavin McInnes" are sourced from the Knowledge Fight Interactive Search Tool. Explore them interactively here.
Misogyny classifications generated with MilaNLProc/bert-base-uncased-ear-misogyny .
Hate speech classifications generated with facebook/roberta-hate-speech-dynabench-r4-target .
00:00:13.000 Live from New York, it's Get Off My Ron with Kevin McGinnis.
00:00:20.000 That's where we'll meet.
00:00:21.000 You make the night.
00:00:23.000 I always rise alive.
00:00:26.000 Time to go bail.
00:00:31.000 I knew right from the beginning that you would end up winning.
00:00:39.000 I knew right from the start, I put an arrow through your heart.
00:00:45.000 Or did she put an arrow through his heart?
00:00:46.000 You put an arrow.
00:00:47.000 I put an arrow through my heart.
00:00:48.000 My heart.
00:00:50.000 I came to the studio.
00:00:51.000 It was a little late today, unfortunately.
00:00:53.000 And Ryan was already there.
00:00:55.000 I'm always here before him, but he was there early today, and he was listening to that song.
00:01:01.000 That song is a track from the 80s, sort of when metal was getting soft for a little while, kind of a hair rock days.
00:01:08.000 The band was Rat with two T's.
00:01:11.000 The song is Round and Round.
00:01:12.000 And I walked in the student and I heard it.
00:01:14.000 It sounded like a very shitty version.
00:01:16.000 And I said, hey, Ryan, are you listening to Rat Live?
00:01:21.000 That would be the first time anyone's ever listened to Rat Live.
00:01:24.000 Is that not true?
00:01:26.000 And he says, no, I'm listening to me doing karaoke of Rat.
00:01:33.000 We were at Anthony's on Labor Day, Anthony Cumias of Opie and Anthony fame.
00:01:40.000 And Ryan is a dork, I guess is the word?
00:01:44.000 I wouldn't say that at all.
00:01:46.000 Who somehow gets the tape of him doing karaoke.
00:01:50.000 Yes.
00:01:52.000 And then the next day, he comes to work and he's so happy with himself that he listens to his own karaoke self.
00:02:02.000 Is that accurate?
00:02:03.000 Yeah, I'm just seeing if I nailed it or not.
00:02:06.000 No, you were listening to it.
00:02:08.000 This is true.
00:02:09.000 Oh, now do you want to show everyone?
00:02:11.000 Yeah.
00:02:12.000 Okay.
00:02:13.000 This is Ryan performing live in Anthony Kumia's basement where he has a karaoke stage.
00:02:20.000 Who's the account?
00:02:23.000 This is my account.
00:02:24.000 Oh, so you've put this up on your Instagram?
00:02:27.000 Correct.
00:02:27.000 It just keeps getting worse.
00:02:30.000 Well, that was from Carl.
00:02:31.000 You have the vanity of a spoiled 12-year-old girl. 0.97
00:02:36.000 I guess that's the Puerto Rican thing.
00:02:38.000 Like the pedicures they get and all that stuff?
00:02:40.000 *music*
00:02:46.000 I do some pretty good hits on there.
00:02:49.000 You got your fanny pack on?
00:02:50.000 Yep.
00:02:51.000 It's a hit pack.
00:02:54.000 Oh, so you've got a nice long one.
00:02:57.000 This is you doing a different song.
00:02:59.000 Yeah.
00:03:00.000 Ryan, no one who watches this show, actually no one on earth but you wants to watch you do this I Want to Fall in Love song That was I wanted Why aren't you showing the round and round rat thing?
00:03:13.000 That's at least a molecule of interesting.
00:03:17.000 Okay.
00:03:18.000 This is zero interesting That's 18 in life Charlotte I said the lyrics wrong You're over annunciating Why would you film this?
00:03:45.000 Your view of the monitor?
00:03:47.000 Yeah, I don't want to show my face because I wanted to sound like rat and so I felt embarrassed So but there is footage of you singing rat.
00:03:55.000 Why aren't you showing that?
00:03:56.000 No, no, no, no.
00:03:57.000 There isn't.
00:03:58.000 Yes, there is.
00:03:58.000 I just saw you on stage with another guy wearing cargo shorts.
00:04:00.000 Different song.
00:04:02.000 Different time.
00:04:04.000 I got some other good video.
00:04:07.000 If you're interested.
00:04:08.000 Nope.
00:04:09.000 You're not interested.
00:04:10.000 Welcome back, folks, to the boring show.
00:04:12.000 Oh, there's drunk me.
00:04:15.000 My whole thesis with this is that the fans don't get to see your legs enough.
00:04:21.000 So, we move ahead, and then we find...
00:04:21.000 Great point.
00:04:25.000 Let me just hear, I'm...
00:04:28.000 I just want to hear me sing Training Me.
00:04:33.000 Wow, I'm turning into my dad.
00:04:41.000 If I turn into my dad, I would just disappear.
00:04:45.000 It'd be like Thanos.
00:04:47.000 I can remember, even though I was drunk, I remember doing that song, and I remember just thinking, why is this not carrying?
00:04:52.000 Like, why isn't this good?
00:04:54.000 And I realized, oh, because I can't sing.
00:04:58.000 But you can.
00:04:59.000 You have good footwork.
00:05:01.000 All right.
00:05:02.000 This is really painful for the folks at home.
00:05:07.000 This show is on a network called Free Speech.
00:05:10.000 We should have SOAF on the site if you tune in, right?
00:05:14.000 Yep.
00:05:15.000 SOAF is a new show.
00:05:17.000 I think, I don't know what we'll get next.
00:05:18.000 Joe Biggs, Laura Loomer?
00:05:21.000 I like that Run Don't Walk guy, but he's already got his YouTube stuff.
00:05:24.000 So we'll wait till he gets banned.
00:05:26.000 They have to be banned to be on the show.
00:05:27.000 I want to become the island of Misfit Toys of banned stuff.
00:05:30.000 But we always talk about free speechiness.
00:05:32.000 And inevitably, when we talk about a free speech event a few days ago, there's updates.
00:05:38.000 Now, remember the bed bug guy?
00:05:41.000 This was a guy, classic, very typical New York Times contributor.
00:05:48.000 And he wrote about free speech.
00:05:50.000 Oh, good.
00:05:51.000 And he said, to be uncomfortable is necessary in a world that has free speech.
00:05:56.000 Oh, he gets it.
00:05:57.000 There he goes.
00:05:58.000 Finally, someone who gets it.
00:05:59.000 Free speech is not hate speech.
00:06:00.000 No, free speech is all speech, including hate speech.
00:06:03.000 Sorry.
00:06:04.000 If it was just good speech, then it would be who's better, the Beatles or the Stones?
00:06:09.000 It has to include horrible stuff.
00:06:13.000 I think it includes a guy who wants to do a seminar on how sexy boys are.
00:06:18.000 Now, he's going to get the shit beaten out of him.
00:06:22.000 And I don't like him, and I'm not going to go to that particular talk.
00:06:26.000 And I think the police should definitely monitor this guy.
00:06:28.000 He's clearly a pedophile.
00:06:30.000 But it should be permitted.
00:06:34.000 Should a Holocaust denier be able to do a talk?
00:06:37.000 Yeah.
00:06:38.000 I mean, the Turks deny the Armenian genocide.
00:06:42.000 Chenk Younger over the young Turks is a Holocaust denier.
00:06:45.000 He denies the Armenian Holocaust.
00:06:47.000 True.
00:06:48.000 Yeah.
00:06:49.000 And I think the beauty of horrible, odious ideas like Holocaust denial and pedophilia is when they get a voice, you're there to shoot them down, figuratively, and they don't grow.
00:07:03.000 When they're allowed to fester, then they get worse and worse because you don't get to say no.
00:07:08.000 That's not why.
00:07:11.000 That's not what happened with Hitler or whatever.
00:07:14.000 Like flat earthers and stuff.
00:07:15.000 That information doesn't hurt anybody to have bullshit.
00:07:19.000 Actually, you know what happened with the flat earthers?
00:07:21.000 They got a gyroscopes.
00:07:23.000 They got some money together and they got like $15,000 for a state-of-the-art NASA-level gyroscope, whatever it's called, that measures rotations.
00:07:33.000 And they applied it to the Earth's rotation and were disappointed to discover that, yes, the Earth is rotating.
00:07:40.000 Another thing they did, and this goes back to what I'm saying, trial and error.
00:07:42.000 They had these three pillars that were several miles apart.
00:07:47.000 And there was a laser that was going through them.
00:07:49.000 And they were the perfect height, perfect distance off sea level, right?
00:07:53.000 So they were all exactly the same height, and they accounted for the ups and downs in the land.
00:07:58.000 And they shone a laser through all three to show you that it would be a perfect line.
00:08:05.000 Well, guess what happened?
00:08:07.000 The middle one was higher than these two because they're on a curve.
00:08:12.000 And so they were very disappointed in that too.
00:08:13.000 So in both cases, sunlight is the best disinfectant.
00:08:16.000 Anyway, so bedbug guy says that it's important to feel uncomfortable.
00:08:16.000 Get it out.
00:08:24.000 And then someone's making fun of him later on, much later on, and they call him a bed bug.
00:08:29.000 And he has a heart attack and contacts the professor and his provost, the professor's boss, and demands, doesn't demand that he gets fired.
00:08:38.000 He claims, I was just CCing the boss just so the boss could see what his employees are up to this week.
00:08:44.000 Oh, that was nice of you.
00:08:46.000 So here's the weird part, an update on this bed bug story.
00:08:49.000 Can you show that tweet?
00:08:50.000 Some douche named David Rothschild says, Right-wing free speech movement is all about, one, creating a safe space for right-wing speech.
00:08:59.000 Two, while squashing...
00:09:06.000 Wait, just one, two.
00:09:07.000 We don't need your one and twos in there. 0.98
00:09:08.000 Just say right-wing free speech movement and the right-wing free speech movement is all about creating a safe space for right-wing speech while squashing progressive speech.
00:09:18.000 Same tactics for Turning Point, Proud Boys, Brett Stevens.
00:09:21.000 So this guy doesn't seem to understand that the New York Times journalist is left-wing.
00:09:26.000 Go back to the tweet.
00:09:28.000 So he's saying that the bed bug guy, he just emailed CCing, my provost.
00:09:37.000 So David Rothschild is saying, oh, the bedbug guy is a Nazi, and these free speech guys, they don't want free speech.
00:09:44.000 No, dude, the bedbug guy's on your side, David Rothschild.
00:09:48.000 You got it wrong.
00:09:50.000 Also, in the news, remember we had that chick on who was kicked off her label for writing a song called I'm a Savage?
00:10:01.000 And it was all about how she's a badass and how she has unbridled rage. 1.00
00:10:07.000 And that was deemed insensitive to First Nations.
00:10:15.000 She wasn't even thinking that.
00:10:15.000 What?
00:10:17.000 So now that adjective has been co-opted by that particular movement, and you're not allowed to use it.
00:10:21.000 So when little kids say, I'm savage, no.
00:10:24.000 So Dior gets together with Johnny Depp, and they go, we want to do a thing called Sauvage.
00:10:34.000 Did I not send this to you?
00:10:35.000 You got it.
00:10:35.000 I got it.
00:10:36.000 Yeah, it's in the notes.
00:10:37.000 Dior's in trouble for Sauvage.
00:10:40.000 And I haven't even seen this yet.
00:10:43.000 I have.
00:10:44.000 Is it banned?
00:10:45.000 I'll find it.
00:10:45.000 I was trying to look for it.
00:10:46.000 Hold on.
00:10:47.000 And so they consult with all these Indians, and the Indians just take a bribe, whatever. 0.99
00:10:53.000 I don't care.
00:10:54.000 Yeah, just don't show it's going to work good.
00:10:57.000 Here's some money.
00:10:59.000 Let me hear it.
00:11:01.000 He plays Link Ray.
00:11:08.000 rumble This is sexy guy, isn't he?
00:11:22.000 I don't know how he became a person again.
00:11:25.000 Because remember those pictures where he looks like he was dying?
00:11:27.000 Yeah.
00:11:28.000 How did they do that?
00:11:29.000 They spoke to McDonald's three times in the game 40 minutes back.
00:11:32.000 That's what Tommy Robinson said.
00:11:33.000 He goes, fucker gave my white bike by looking at it McDonald's.
00:11:36.000 Wow.
00:11:38.000 I thought it's a really beautiful commercial.
00:11:40.000 And that Indian's an Indian. 0.95
00:11:42.000 We are.
00:11:42.000 Right.
00:11:43.000 It's not like some white dude.
00:11:45.000 So they hired Indians for their commercials. 0.99
00:11:47.000 That looks cool.
00:11:47.000 All right.
00:11:48.000 But what does the Twitter moment say?
00:11:50.000 It's not acceptable.
00:11:52.000 Why isn't it acceptable?
00:11:54.000 Because they used the word salvage and they were called savages, perhaps?
00:11:58.000 Read what that says.
00:11:59.000 Oh, it says, Dior accused of culture appropriation for salvage campaign.
00:12:03.000 Ad featuring Johnny Depp, the French luxury brand is facing backlash for a new campaign that offers authentic journey deep into the Native American soul in the sacred founding and secular territory.
00:12:12.000 I saw one of the tweets in that thing.
00:12:15.000 Scroll down.
00:12:16.000 I might have it on my phone, actually.
00:12:17.000 She said, she goes, because Dior goes, but we did it with Indians and they said it was cool.
00:12:25.000 And she says, no, that's not good enough.
00:12:31.000 Her name is Dr. Adrian Keene.
00:12:33.000 Oh, got it.
00:12:34.000 Can I read it as Johnny Depp?
00:12:35.000 Yeah.
00:12:36.000 So the fact that Sauvaler is on some We Are the Land BS is not surprising.
00:12:40.000 But as always, I find it deeply disturbing when brands force Native people to make the choice between stereotypes and misrepresentation or invisibility.
00:12:49.000 Oh, you stuck a soprano in your Johnny Depp. 0.55
00:12:51.000 Yes.
00:12:54.000 So her point is, you can't, the Indian had no choice.
00:12:58.000 It was either invisibility Or a stereotype.
00:13:01.000 Guess what happens at powwows, which happen every year for every tribe?
00:13:07.000 They have fancy dancers and they dress up like that and they dance like that.
00:13:11.000 Is that a stereotype?
00:13:13.000 They still do that on a regular basis.
00:13:19.000 What is a powwow if it's not Indians dancing? 1.00
00:13:23.000 That's their number one thing to get together.
00:13:25.000 It's like the Irish Parade.
00:13:27.000 The Irish Parade has the bagpipes, which are Scottish, by the way.
00:13:30.000 And the Indians have the powwows. 0.98
00:13:32.000 So you're not allowed to show a fancy dancer?
00:13:35.000 Can't these people get any fucking money?
00:13:38.000 Jesus Christ, mind your own business.
00:13:41.000 She actually made a good point.
00:13:43.000 Their other option to not be represented is invisibility.
00:13:47.000 You know?
00:13:49.000 So, yeah, that's good that they're represented.
00:13:52.000 Oh, I see.
00:13:54.000 Yeah.
00:13:55.000 You were saying something tight.
00:13:56.000 I can't shake the Johnny Depp impression, but I think Jeff Yang is on the side of the thing.
00:14:01.000 Dior collaborated with Americans for Indian opportunity to ensure respect for indigenous cultures, values, and heritage.
00:14:08.000 AIO was run by LaDonna Harris, who adopted Johnny Depp into the Comanche Nation before he played Tonto in the 2013 reboot, The Lone Ranger.
00:14:17.000 Pretty good, right?
00:14:18.000 Yeah.
00:14:19.000 The notion you can just be adopted by a tribe is fucking ridiculous.
00:14:23.000 When my kids were born, they get checks because they have a casino and there's a settlement.
00:14:27.000 So they get two sources of income.
00:14:30.000 And they had to have their mouth swabbed to make sure that they were more than 25% Indian. 0.98
00:14:35.000 You know what was weird?
00:14:36.000 I had to have my mouth swabbed.
00:14:38.000 I'm not getting a check.
00:14:40.000 Like, why do you care who the dad is?
00:14:42.000 Yeah, it is weird.
00:14:43.000 Yes, it is very weird.
00:14:45.000 Maybe to make sure that you aren't missing out on being Native American and you don't know about it.
00:14:56.000 So we got that.
00:14:57.000 There was the Straight Pride Parade. 0.82
00:15:00.000 That's exciting, isn't it?
00:15:01.000 Let me explain the Straight Pride Parade to you just briefly in case you don't get it.
00:15:01.000 Yes.
00:15:05.000 It's the same as this.
00:15:06.000 It's the same as wearing a shirt that says it's okay to be white.
00:15:11.000 It's the same as having an anti-Sharia rally.
00:15:14.000 We did that in New York.
00:15:15.000 We had an anti-Sharia March rally.
00:15:17.000 And the reason we did it was not because we think Sharia is looming, but to show how ridiculous Clown World is and how you can't even be against Sharia law. 0.76
00:15:27.000 Sharia law literally has women as second-class citizens. 0.99
00:15:32.000 If a woman is raped, her testimony is worth half of what a man's is. 0.92
00:15:38.000 So if she's raped and he has one witness, she better have two. 0.69
00:15:44.000 And then they're still at zero.
00:15:45.000 Now it's still he said, she said, so I guess she needs three.
00:15:49.000 But there's also some bad stuff about it, too.
00:15:52.000 And if you're progressive, then you should be against that.
00:15:55.000 So the reason we had a Sharia march in New York was to show the world that Antifa is on the side of anything that's not Trumpy. 0.81
00:16:06.000 So if Trump guys are anti-Sharia, they're pro-Sharia. 0.90
00:16:10.000 Logic be damned.
00:16:11.000 So I think the Straight Pride Parade, people were just saying, okay, gay pride, awesome, fine.
00:16:16.000 Would you mind if we had a straight pride parade?
00:16:18.000 There shouldn't be anything wrong with that.
00:16:19.000 And everyone lost their shit.
00:16:22.000 I sent you some pictures.
00:16:23.000 I emailed you some pictures.
00:16:25.000 This was a thing going around.
00:16:27.000 Straight sex is rape, and sex with whites is white supremacy. 0.71
00:16:31.000 That's crazy.
00:16:33.000 So I have a lot of straight sex with my wife, but she's not white. 1.00
00:16:36.000 So I'm not a white supremacist, but I am a rapist.
00:16:40.000 Unfortunately.
00:16:41.000 And I didn't know.
00:16:42.000 Are you a rapist if you don't know?
00:16:44.000 My wife doesn't know she's being raped. 1.00
00:16:46.000 Ignorance is nine-tenths of the law.
00:16:48.000 Next time I have sex with her, I'm going to say, did you know this is rape? 1.00
00:16:54.000 And then this sort of sums up here.
00:16:57.000 This picture is, I saw another one too of a woman in a rainbow shirt that said love, and she was like this for hours.
00:17:04.000 This picture sums up why you need a straight pride parade. 0.97
00:17:07.000 Fuck straight pride, solidarity, black lives matter.
00:17:11.000 Did they say black lives don't matter at the straight pride parade? 0.72
00:17:14.000 Yeah.
00:17:15.000 Straight is racist.
00:17:16.000 Remember?
00:17:17.000 I saw that.
00:17:18.000 This was an interesting tweet.
00:17:19.000 I hate Paul F. Tompkins.
00:17:21.000 We've talked about him on the show many times.
00:17:23.000 He was the one who had Kian Peele on and was touching his face like this while they were talking.
00:17:28.000 Remember that?
00:17:28.000 Yes.
00:17:30.000 Like he had two little pet Negroes that he was so proud of. 0.95
00:17:33.000 Anyway, he takes an article from the Independent, which is basically just an Antifa Zine.
00:17:38.000 It's a pure communist.
00:17:40.000 And what does it say?
00:17:42.000 Ha ha ha.
00:17:43.000 What a reveal.
00:17:43.000 It says, straight pride organizers revealed to have links to far-right and white nationalist groups.
00:17:50.000 And then Paul goes, ha ha ha, what a reveal.
00:17:53.000 Now, his sarcasm there, which has tens of thousands of retweets, and of course, people like me who could correct him or make fun of him are not allowed on, which is probably why we're not allowed on, right?
00:18:04.000 So they can control the narrative.
00:18:06.000 He says, ha ha ha, what a reveal.
00:18:09.000 As in, duh.
00:18:10.000 Of course they're white nationalists.
00:18:12.000 Of course, straight pride is secretly a way of saying white pride.
00:18:18.000 No, it's the opposite of that.
00:18:20.000 It's saying, you guys are so far left, you're so radical that I bet you won't even let me be straight.
00:18:25.000 I bet you think it's somehow an affront to you if I'm straight.
00:18:29.000 And they prove that beyond the shadow of a doubt.
00:18:32.000 So I looked it up.
00:18:33.000 I looked up the link.
00:18:34.000 What are you doing over there?
00:18:35.000 Trying to log into Parlor because you said something cool about it on Parlor.
00:18:38.000 Yeah, no.
00:18:40.000 Just stay with the task at hand.
00:18:42.000 So I look at the independent link, right?
00:18:44.000 The independent.co.uk, I believe it is, that Paul F. Tompkins is talking about.
00:18:51.000 And he clearly hasn't read it.
00:18:53.000 He just saw their white nationalist, and he goes, I knew it.
00:18:55.000 I knew straight people are all racist. 0.80
00:18:58.000 And so I read the article, and you scroll down, and it says, the relationship that these guys have is they were once seen with people from Resist Marxism.
00:19:10.000 Now, I'm not totally well versed in Resist Marxism, but my understanding is they are an anti-socialist group.
00:19:18.000 So it's, you're a white supremacist.
00:19:20.000 And look, they do this all the time.
00:19:21.000 They have links to white supremacist organizations, and then white supremacists is a hyperlink, so it looks like it's more valid. 1.00
00:19:29.000 But then you click That link, right?
00:19:31.000 And it'll just be something on white supremacists.
00:19:34.000 It won't be the free speech organizers in Klan uniforms. 0.76
00:19:37.000 Yeah, look, just a bunch of articles about them.
00:19:40.000 Other independent articles.
00:19:42.000 Yeah, yeah.
00:19:42.000 Conveniently.
00:19:44.000 Just a bunch of like actual Nazi stuff.
00:19:46.000 So go back.
00:19:48.000 Yeah, so the whole thing was that they're tied to resist Marxism.
00:19:53.000 In other words, if you're not a socialist and not gay, you're a white nationalist. 0.79
00:20:00.000 You're a fascist.
00:20:02.000 Clown world.
00:20:05.000 Speaking of clown world, since I last saw you, my buddy Trigger Tommy is off to jail for a long time.
00:20:14.000 He defended himself with a knife.
00:20:16.000 Now, let me give you the backstory.
00:20:19.000 I had a fundraiser for him back before when you were allowed to have fundraisers.
00:20:25.000 And, okay, this all started in 2010 when I think he was in Portland.
00:20:31.000 Where was he?
00:20:32.000 Maybe somewhere in California.
00:20:34.000 And he got beat up by sharpskins. 0.91
00:20:36.000 Sharpskins are guys, they're skinheads against racial prejudice, but they ran out of Nazis a long time ago.
00:20:41.000 So now they'll beat up like Ryan because he knows me.
00:20:44.000 Because I resist Marxism.
00:20:46.000 So they terrorize him so much he leaves town and he moves to Chicago.
00:20:54.000 But, and he says, okay, fine, Antifa, you win.
00:20:56.000 I'm leaving.
00:20:57.000 This is a punk kid, right?
00:20:58.000 Moves to Chicago.
00:21:00.000 They track him down there and they start following him.
00:21:03.000 They put his picture all over town.
00:21:05.000 All their little stupid networks say, get Tommy if you see him.
00:21:07.000 He's a Nazi. 0.78
00:21:08.000 This, by the way, is all stemmed from him just hating communism and saying, I don't understand why punk has to be so socialist.
00:21:14.000 Johnny Ramon was against it.
00:21:16.000 Can I just be one of those Johnny Ramon guys?
00:21:18.000 No.
00:21:21.000 So he's at a pool hall about five years ago, maybe now?
00:21:27.000 And, well, actually, I might have it here on my list.
00:21:31.000 It was April 11th of two years ago.
00:21:37.000 And he's at a pool hall playing pool with his girlfriend.
00:21:40.000 And word gets out and they get on their little $500 phones and they say, the Nazis here.
00:21:44.000 Get him.
00:21:45.000 So they show up to this pool hall and they attack him with pool cues.
00:21:50.000 And they beat his girlfriend.
00:21:51.000 They beat him.
00:21:52.000 They split his head open.
00:21:54.000 There's his lovely gal.
00:21:56.000 They split his head open and he needs 13 staples to hold it together.
00:22:02.000 And then they keep taunting him with this, hey, you want to play pool again, Tommy?
00:22:06.000 Hey, Tommy, let's play some billiards.
00:22:09.000 So he has to watch wherever he goes, and he's already tried moving.
00:22:12.000 So he's being hunted.
00:22:15.000 And I've noticed in court of law, this is always totally ignored.
00:22:19.000 And every confrontation is treated like it just spontaneously sprung out of the ground.
00:22:23.000 If you're being hunted and it's all over social media, shouldn't that affect your social, your self-defense case?
00:22:30.000 Like, it's one thing if some guy, I walk outside and some guy punches me in the nose.
00:22:34.000 He's a drunk, crazy person.
00:22:35.000 Isn't that different from some guy saying, I'm going to get you.
00:22:38.000 I'm going to find you.
00:22:39.000 Tweeting me pictures of a fist.
00:22:41.000 I'm going to punch you.
00:22:41.000 And then it eventually happens?
00:22:44.000 I don't know, but I would think it should be.
00:22:47.000 Right?
00:22:49.000 And if you were defending yourself, defending yourself against some crazy bum who punches you, you'd just be more like, get the hell out of here. 0.99
00:22:57.000 Defending yourself against someone who's been chasing you all over the country and talking about how they're going to kill you, that's a different scenario.
00:23:04.000 Anyway, he gets to this show.
00:23:07.000 You can show the headline now.
00:23:08.000 And I think it was a Dropkick Murphy show.
00:23:11.000 And they go, Tommy's here.
00:23:13.000 So he goes, uh-oh, I've been spotted.
00:23:16.000 I better get the hell out of here.
00:23:17.000 And he has a knife, by the way.
00:23:19.000 And I think it's an outdoor concert.
00:23:21.000 They see him and he starts trying to leave and they corner him.
00:23:26.000 And he goes to the right.
00:23:27.000 They go to the right.
00:23:28.000 And then this mob starts moving in with these two guys in the front.
00:23:32.000 And eventually he pulls out a knife and he goes, look, I don't want any trouble.
00:23:36.000 Please get back.
00:23:37.000 And in a normal world, they go, okay, okay, whoa, whoa, whoa.
00:23:41.000 Jesus.
00:23:42.000 They laugh.
00:23:44.000 Like, isn't that bizarre?
00:23:45.000 I think it's because they've never been in a fight before.
00:23:47.000 Or maybe they just watch too much TV and they think they can do some Crab McGraw move.
00:23:53.000 This guy, by the way, has skin head tattooed on his knuckles.
00:23:57.000 The guy who did the attacking.
00:23:59.000 He was hiding his hands in court so the judge wouldn't see that he was helping out a skinhead.
00:24:04.000 Anyway, the skinhead against racial prejudice, or maybe he's a Nazi skinhead, I don't even know, laughs at the knife and lunges at him.
00:24:12.000 So Tommy goes, cuts him here and stabs him here.
00:24:17.000 And the judge said, throw the book at him because he's a proud boy is what really happened here.
00:24:25.000 Justice was ignored.
00:24:26.000 And, you know, this happened a year ago and they paid his bail.
00:24:32.000 Proud boys did.
00:24:33.000 And that got him out for this year.
00:24:34.000 But I just realized the other day, if they hadn't paid his bail, he would have been in whatever Chicago's version of Rikers is for this entire time, this entire year.
00:24:46.000 That's not an expeditious trial.
00:24:48.000 That's not swift justice.
00:24:50.000 So I know what you're saying.
00:24:51.000 You're saying, what can we do to help, Gav?
00:24:54.000 I don't know.
00:24:55.000 I mean, they raised money for him.
00:24:57.000 I talked to the lawyer.
00:24:58.000 The lawyer was just, he goes, I just need to vent.
00:25:00.000 I've never seen anything like this.
00:25:03.000 The guy who attacked Tommy had 40 pounds on him.
00:25:05.000 The judge just said it was a soft.
00:25:07.000 Oh, oh, sorry.
00:25:08.000 Another minor detail.
00:25:10.000 The guy got a bunch of punches in at Tommy before he pulled out the knife.
00:25:14.000 And he had 40 pounds on him.
00:25:15.000 So Tommy was being beaten.
00:25:17.000 And this has already happened many times.
00:25:19.000 He'd fled his hometown to get away from these lunatics.
00:25:22.000 And there they found him.
00:25:23.000 Eventually he pulled out a knife.
00:25:25.000 What happened?
00:25:25.000 He's in jail.
00:25:28.000 Just like Max and John are headed to jail.
00:25:32.000 Meanwhile, Antifa literally gets away with murder.
00:25:36.000 And the press supports it.
00:25:38.000 The Dayton Ohio shooter was an Antifa supporter.
00:25:41.000 No mention of it.
00:25:42.000 Dropped.
00:25:43.000 It's already gone from the news.
00:25:45.000 Imagine he had a fucking MAGA hat on.
00:25:47.000 Oh, oi Ve.
00:25:49.000 All right, we're getting too serious.
00:25:52.000 Don't you think?
00:25:54.000 Yes.
00:25:55.000 Let's look at Michael Rappaport get made fun of.
00:25:58.000 Ooh, yay.
00:25:59.000 So we had Rappapore on, bitching at Trump, saying, Keep the Jews out your mouth.
00:26:04.000 We had no idea he was Jewish.
00:26:05.000 I thought he was Irish.
00:26:08.000 But apparently, other people hate him as much as we do.
00:26:11.000 Not playing, I mean, my man is looking custom suit sharp.
00:26:17.000 Katino, this is a tough game.
00:26:19.000 Killer 3s are not playing around.
00:26:20.000 What do you have to say about this game?
00:26:25.000 My man, you're looking at me like you want to put hands on me.
00:26:27.000 Please, please, man, before I put hands on me, I ain't mine.
00:26:31.000 I'm not stealing breeding.
00:26:32.000 Get off of me, man.
00:26:38.000 Could you know what we just told me?
00:26:39.000 He would put hands on me on live TV, CBS Sports Victory playoffs.
00:26:46.000 Wow, that is uncomfortable.
00:26:47.000 It's breathtakingly uncomfortable.
00:26:49.000 But you know another weird thing about it, too, is he says he's looking custom suit sharp.
00:26:54.000 Yeah.
00:26:54.000 You got to be relatively lower middle class to not have any tailored suits.
00:26:59.000 These guys are billionaires.
00:27:01.000 Of course he has a custom suit.
00:27:03.000 And he's nine feet tall.
00:27:05.000 I don't think they make suits.
00:27:07.000 It has to be custom.
00:27:08.000 It has to be.
00:27:09.000 What a dumb thing to say.
00:27:10.000 What an irritating person.
00:27:12.000 Yo, my man is custom suit fitted right now.
00:27:15.000 My man is looking custom suit sharp.
00:27:19.000 Custom suit sharp.
00:27:21.000 Yo, you look like you want to put hands on me.
00:27:23.000 Hands on me.
00:27:25.000 Yeah.
00:27:25.000 And then when he's all like defeated, he's like, he does this.
00:27:30.000 Yo.
00:27:31.000 I'm exasperated.
00:27:33.000 It's so sickly embarrassing.
00:27:37.000 But in his defense, what would you do?
00:27:40.000 I would just be like, so you're saying, hey, you're right.
00:27:43.000 We're here talking to LeBron James.
00:27:44.000 And he just goes, I go, alrighty, LeBron James does not want to talk to me, so we're going to move.
00:27:50.000 That's what I would do.
00:27:50.000 Yeah, yeah.
00:27:51.000 I think I can handle it.
00:27:52.000 I could even be like, you can do anything you want because he's not going to, what is he going to do to you?
00:27:58.000 You know?
00:27:59.000 Am I going to beat you up?
00:28:00.000 It might be cool just to make it worse.
00:28:02.000 So you go, hey, we're here with LeBron James.
00:28:04.000 He's looking really good in his typical custom suit, typical of NBA players.
00:28:08.000 They all have custom suits, obviously.
00:28:10.000 LeBron James, how do you think this game is playing out?
00:28:15.000 All right, so you're angry.
00:28:17.000 Do we have some sort of beef?
00:28:18.000 I don't remember?
00:28:20.000 Oh I do remember So okay we You make up a story.
00:28:26.000 Yeah.
00:28:27.000 You know what happened?
00:28:28.000 We got dinner reservations.
00:28:29.000 Oh, you're mad that I didn't like the Ghostbusters reboot.
00:28:32.000 You're a Melissa McCarthy fan.
00:28:34.000 Oh, by the way, good news on that.
00:28:36.000 I was correct.
00:28:37.000 And the kitchen is bombing like a lead balloon.
00:28:41.000 It's Melissa McCarthy's worst opening, obviously. 0.99
00:28:44.000 And she was part of Ghostbusters 2.
00:28:46.000 No, no, sorry, Ghostbusters reboot.
00:28:49.000 And you know what else is bombing?
00:28:51.000 The other prediction we made, that terrible Bruce Springsteen movie about Luton, where they talk about the Nazi skinhead problem in Luton. 0.50
00:28:59.000 Meanwhile, that's where Tommy Robinson is from, and it's 40% Muslim. 1.00
00:29:02.000 And if you walk down the street with, if a girl walks down the street in short shorts, she'll get attacked by Muslims for being too revealing. 1.00
00:29:11.000 So, yeah, it's a dumb.
00:29:14.000 Also, speaking of, I almost said the W, is the W igger word not sayable? 1.00
00:29:22.000 I think I could say it.
00:29:24.000 Can I say Wigger? 0.90
00:29:25.000 Because isn't it complimentary to African Americans?
00:29:30.000 But it's also, I don't know.
00:29:33.000 Because you're saying this guy wants to be black.
00:29:35.000 Yeah, but black is not synonymous with the word that Ryan.
00:29:40.000 Well, you can't really say wallack.
00:29:42.000 You could.
00:29:43.000 You just did.
00:29:44.000 It just sucks.
00:29:46.000 Just stinks.
00:29:47.000 All right, I won't say it then.
00:29:48.000 I just don't see the logic.
00:29:49.000 Sometimes I don't quite follow these new rules.
00:29:52.000 But Bella Hadid did the most cringy sneaker thing. 1.00
00:29:57.000 It's so insincere.
00:30:00.000 I love it.
00:30:02.000 Well, basically, she says at a sneakers show that if you have nice shoes, you can have sex with me, which I doubt is true.
00:30:10.000 I'm willing to try.
00:30:11.000 Right.
00:30:11.000 And by the way, the sneakers that she put, they're not even...
00:30:14.000 I mean, they're classic, but...
00:30:16.000 Oh, yeah, you're a sneaker dude.
00:30:18.000 In LA, they're going to look at your sneakers and be like, whoa, Air Max 90s or whatever.
00:30:23.000 I don't understand you.
00:30:24.000 You have a dope shoe that both guys and girls can wear?
00:30:26.000 I mean, matching shoes, that's dope.
00:30:29.000 What are some of your sneaker turn-offs, though?
00:30:32.000 You know what?
00:30:32.000 I'm cool with it, and I don't mind dirty sneakers, but they better be fresh, you know?
00:30:38.000 Is she at gunpoint? 0.79
00:30:42.000 She looks like a robot that just learned how to talk about stuff.
00:30:45.000 Matching shoes, that's dope.
00:30:46.000 What are some of your sneaker turn-offs, though?
00:30:48.000 You know what?
00:30:49.000 I'm cool with it, and I don't mind dirty sneakers, but they better be fresh, you know?
00:30:54.000 If Homeboy's coming through with these, it's quiet.
00:30:57.000 Yeah, no, it's quiet.
00:30:58.000 It's cool.
00:30:59.000 But like, if he comes through in like these, you got some Air Maxes out here.
00:31:05.000 You got some Jordans.
00:31:07.000 Homeboy's gonna, like, get it.
00:31:11.000 Homeboy's gonna, like, get it.
00:31:13.000 I'm having a real tough time with this one.
00:31:15.000 If you wear Air Maxes, Homeboy's gonna get it.
00:31:19.000 If you wear these, then it's quiet.
00:31:21.000 Quiet.
00:31:22.000 It's quiet.
00:31:23.000 You see the spin?
00:31:25.000 Yeah.
00:31:26.000 The spin was pretty rough.
00:31:27.000 Oh, my goodness.
00:31:28.000 God, she makes me so uncomfortable.
00:31:30.000 Very attractive young lady, though.
00:31:31.000 Gavin, this is one of the worst...
00:31:34.000 This is the worst cringe video we've ever had, according to you.
00:31:36.000 Back to back with Rappaport and this, it just seems like...
00:31:44.000 If Homeboy's coming through with these, it's quiet.
00:31:46.000 Yeah, no, it's quiet for him.
00:31:48.000 But like, if he comes through in like airboxes out here, look at this. 0.97
00:31:54.000 He's like, this is going on Reddit Cringe.
00:31:56.000 Homeboy's gonna like, get it.
00:31:59.000 Is she on acid? 0.76
00:32:00.000 Homeboy's gonna like, get it.
00:32:02.000 Dude, that is one of the worst things about it.
00:32:04.000 Okay, so those were two good cringe videos in a row, and they both involve people pretending to be what they're not, pretending to be black. 0.86
00:32:12.000 So I put the onus on you because you told me, I don't give a shit about shoes, but you told me you watch these sneaker videos and the Asian kids are really into sneakers. 1.00
00:32:22.000 And they always say things like, this is really dope.
00:32:24.000 You got a really dope chill shoe.
00:32:26.000 Like, basically, like, number one hottest sneaker right now, like Death Roy the Yeezys.
00:32:30.000 Daffery?
00:32:31.000 Deferry the Yeezys. 0.97
00:32:33.000 Definitely Yeezys? 0.99
00:32:34.000 Defere.
00:32:36.000 What are you doing?
00:32:37.000 Okay, right now, yo, it's your boy.
00:32:39.000 Thanks for tuning back in.
00:32:40.000 Don't forget, subscribe, hit that smash button.
00:32:44.000 Smash button. 0.62
00:32:46.000 Now, number one, hot issue.
00:32:47.000 A lot of people sleep on this, sitting on shelf.
00:32:49.000 Like, come on, bro.
00:32:51.000 Anyway, I should start a new YouTuber.
00:32:58.000 It's just that.
00:32:59.000 Yeah, you should.
00:33:00.000 You should.
00:33:00.000 But you know what you should do?
00:33:02.000 Instead of reviewing sneakers, just review everything.
00:33:05.000 Like, take that woody Pez and go. 1.00
00:33:07.000 This is a new Pez people talking about. 1.00
00:33:08.000 A lot of people sleeping on this.
00:33:10.000 It's very dope.
00:33:11.000 You know, a lot of people say it's quiet if you got this, but I think Homeboy should get some.
00:33:16.000 Okay, if you show up to a playground like this, pretty quiet.
00:33:20.000 With the bus right here, with the queer see-through acrid, look at that detail on that. 1.00
00:33:25.000 Real crazy.
00:33:26.000 And look, totally delicious.
00:33:29.000 American power, number one, rock and roll.
00:33:33.000 Like, why would you come here and then skip regular English to learn like a jump at a dialect that is that's not compatible with most there's a lot of L's and R's in that in that slang this reary hype it's just unfortunate is what it is it's okay so I haven't seen this but you're gonna show me uh the third because all good things come in three a third cringe what uh non-black ubonics it's amazing nbe now you can drop the needle anywhere on 0.87
00:34:03.000 as you say.
00:34:04.000 Oh, good.
00:34:04.000 My possession?
00:34:05.000 Yeah, I'm not scared.
00:34:06.000 What are you talking about?
00:34:07.000 So let me, the lead up is that they're going to play hoops to see who gets the sneakers.
00:34:11.000 Like, yo, I'll take, you can take my sneakers if you beat me.
00:34:14.000 But these guys aren't, they don't have Asian accents.
00:34:16.000 They're born here.
00:34:17.000 Right?
00:34:18.000 Correct.
00:34:19.000 Okay.
00:34:19.000 I'm going to lock you up right now.
00:34:21.000 Get the ball.
00:34:21.000 I'm going to freaking score on you.
00:34:22.000 All right, check it.
00:34:24.000 All top, man.
00:34:27.000 Shoot.
00:34:27.000 Why are you flinching?
00:34:28.000 Just give me the right dog, shoot. 0.87
00:34:30.000 I'm about to take those candy knives off your feet. 1.00
00:34:33.000 What side you want me to go?
00:34:34.000 Oh! 0.60
00:34:35.000 Oh my god!
00:34:37.000 Oh! 0.60
00:34:38.000 Oh! 0.60
00:34:39.000 It's over!
00:34:40.000 Do they call the baseball a rock?
00:34:43.000 Yes, the basketball.
00:34:44.000 They also call it...
00:34:46.000 I just got these.
00:34:47.000 Well, you say you're so good.
00:34:49.000 Why don't you put your game where your mouth is?
00:34:51.000 So what do you want to put on the line then?
00:34:53.000 If I'm going to put these keys up, what are you going to put up?
00:34:55.000 All right, if you win, I'll give you whatever I got in my backpack.
00:34:58.000 Whatever kicks I got in here.
00:34:59.000 Wait.
00:35:00.000 The slapping of the...
00:35:03.000 I got in my backpack.
00:35:03.000 Whatever kicks I got in here.
00:35:04.000 Who are you?
00:35:05.000 Who's he pretending to be a specific different black guy? 0.69
00:35:07.000 Yeah, that wasn't as good as I hoped.
00:35:09.000 It's cringy.
00:35:10.000 Eh, could be cringier.
00:35:12.000 No, those are bad people.
00:35:14.000 Okay, I'm on a bunch of weird chats now that I've been sequestered to the ghetto of the internet.
00:35:21.000 So, sometimes I get these stories and I'm like, this is...
00:35:25.000 this cannot be true.
00:35:26.000 But on the off chance it is, I found this...
00:35:31.000 where is it now?
00:35:33.000 Oh yeah.
00:35:35.000 Folks, this is not a news show, right?
00:35:37.000 I just try to show you interesting stuff and...
00:35:40.000 and try to expose clown world for what it is.
00:35:43.000 So, this is not...
00:35:44.000 Breaking news.
00:35:46.000 But I discovered this thing called a breeding fetish where women get pregnant on purpose. 1.00
00:35:53.000 They enjoy it.
00:35:55.000 They feel the gestation starting and then they go have an abortion.
00:35:59.000 Now, this is on a pro-life site and they're talking about killing babies for sexual pleasure and they scroll down.
00:36:08.000 Now, so first it talks about what abortion is.
00:36:11.000 I mean, it's...
00:36:11.000 it can tell it's written by an old lady and she's Christian.
00:36:14.000 But jump down to the actual quotes.
00:36:17.000 Why don't you read those for us as Johnny Depp?
00:36:19.000 Not a problem.
00:36:21.000 Now, go up.
00:36:23.000 You're way too far down.
00:36:24.000 Okay.
00:36:25.000 Are these them?
00:36:27.000 Uliava.
00:36:28.000 Yeah.
00:36:28.000 It's the Uliava tribe.
00:36:30.000 I have a female friend who has a really powerful fetish for breeding... 1.00
00:36:34.000 breeding she never used to any type of birth control she's a male partner who's currently just like her into breeding and they've been practicing their fetish for quite a few abortions i know this is a heavy subject for some but yeah yeah pretty heavy got to the point where i'm worried for her health i personally didn't study abortions i was wondering if it might seriously impact her she's like a sister to me keep going there's another one now read from klaus klaus 2018.
00:37:00.000 I know this fetish.
00:37:01.000 My girlfriend and me have the same fetish.
00:37:02.000 My girlfriend enjoys her pregnancies and she enjoys the abortions. 1.00
00:37:05.000 Her preferred date is to abort between the 20 and 24th weeks of gestation. 0.85
00:37:09.000 I enjoy making her pregnant. 1.00
00:37:11.000 Wait a minute.
00:37:12.000 24 weeks.
00:37:13.000 Go look up 24 week fetus. 0.69
00:37:16.000 What the fuck kind of planet are we living on?
00:37:21.000 I think there might be people on Reddit who just are sort of goth.
00:37:21.000 If this is true.
00:37:25.000 And they choose to make these characters.
00:37:28.000 Like remember that cop, the cannibal cop? 0.84
00:37:30.000 I think he went to jail.
00:37:31.000 Gil Valley, yeah.
00:37:32.000 He could have just been.
00:37:33.000 Didn't you have him on Pat Dixon's show?
00:37:36.000 Yeah, he's a good guy.
00:37:37.000 He writes books now and stuff.
00:37:38.000 Did he go to jail?
00:37:39.000 Did he lose his job?
00:37:40.000 I think, yeah.
00:37:41.000 I think he lost his job and went to jail.
00:37:43.000 Yes.
00:37:44.000 But he could have just been fantasizing about something that macabre.
00:37:49.000 Yeah.
00:37:50.000 But yeah, look, that baby's done.
00:37:53.000 It's good to go.
00:37:54.000 Week 24 highlights.
00:37:56.000 The dark and harmless line may show up on your belly.
00:37:58.000 Your kidneys are working overtime.
00:38:00.000 Feels like your stomach shrunk.
00:38:01.000 That's because of your expending uterus. 1.00
00:38:03.000 Brian, why would you show the woman?
00:38:04.000 No one gives a shit about the...
00:38:07.000 I once had a Freudian slip there.
00:38:09.000 No, but we want to see the size of the baby, not what the skin tone of the woman's belly is. 0.98
00:38:16.000 It's about that size.
00:38:16.000 Holy shizah.
00:38:18.000 That's a baby with little arms and everything.
00:38:20.000 A face.
00:38:21.000 Ears.
00:38:21.000 Oh my God.
00:38:22.000 If this is true, this is the most macabre thing I've ever heard of in my life.
00:38:26.000 Go back to the article, though.
00:38:29.000 And say it as Johnny Depp.
00:38:33.000 Too old to abort and too young to die.
00:38:35.000 I think they can survive at 19 weeks.
00:38:38.000 Really?
00:38:39.000 Yeah.
00:38:39.000 Go read another write-up, though.
00:38:41.000 Okay.
00:38:41.000 Here we go.
00:38:44.000 Okay.
00:38:44.000 Sexuality without prevention is very emotional and inexpensive.
00:38:50.000 Wow.
00:38:51.000 In the last 10 years, our relationship have done about seven abortions and my girlfriend is pregnant again with a little girl. 0.52
00:38:57.000 Abortion fetish is a great method for birth control. 0.99
00:39:00.000 Do not be angry about your girlfriend.
00:39:02.000 them enjoy their pregnancies and then abort terrific is that's their screen name this could be a this because i i couldn't find anything else about It's a very hard thing to Google, obviously, because a million things come up with abortion and pregnancy and all that stuff.
00:39:15.000 Yeah, they should have put screenshots if you know.
00:39:18.000 No, no, I think the Reddit exists.
00:39:20.000 They link to the Reddit.
00:39:21.000 Oh, they do.
00:39:22.000 But I'm just saying these people on the Reddit might just be trying to like, remember the free bleeding where a bunch of 4chan people convinced feminists that it was empowering to menstruate in your white jeans and they all fell for it?
00:39:32.000 By the way, that's become a thing now.
00:39:34.000 Even after 4chan exposed that it was a lie, they're still doing it.
00:39:39.000 Okay, keep reading the third one.
00:39:41.000 Abortion.
00:39:42.000 It's good and rare to hear of people, both men and women, where both members are into abortion and pregnancy.
00:39:48.000 This is a wonderful and potent example of personal power where sex meets violence and creation combines with the destruction.
00:39:53.000 That's something Johnny Depp would say.
00:39:56.000 Like Hunter S. Thompson type shit.
00:39:58.000 They were magnificent bastards.
00:40:00.000 Anyway, thank you for sharing your exciting romance and everyone would like to know about this latest abortion for you.
00:40:05.000 I can imagine that it's a very bonding experience between you and your partner.
00:40:08.000 Okay, I can't read anymore.
00:40:10.000 It's not a very bonding experience for the kids.
00:40:12.000 That is the most horrible thing I've ever read.
00:40:14.000 And we'll keep investigating that.
00:40:16.000 Another thing I like about this show is we have so many autists that watch that they inevitably do my homework for me. 1.00
00:40:22.000 And I'll get like 50 emails tomorrow explaining the origin of the fetish and who was arrested for it and blah, blah, blah.
00:40:27.000 I'll be an expert by tomorrow without doing any work.
00:40:30.000 Now, this story is fake.
00:40:34.000 Tannerite stuffed dog.
00:40:37.000 That's so mean, right?
00:40:40.000 So what happens is, you know what the freaks on the internet are calling the Boogaloo?
00:40:47.000 They're talking about the imminent civil war.
00:40:48.000 It could be us versus the government or the left versus the right, but they're all these prep guys.
00:40:52.000 They talk about when's the next, let's do the boogaloo.
00:40:55.000 Ready for the boogaloo?
00:40:56.000 So on these boogaloo sites, I told you I've been relegated to the dark corners, they have this, they say tannerite stuffed dog, hottest selling item on Amazon. 0.88
00:41:06.000 And the pretense is, right, you're not at home.
00:41:08.000 You go there, the FBI comes in, the first thing they do is shoot your dog, and it blows up.
00:41:15.000 So the people busting into your house and killing your dog instantly die.
00:41:19.000 But it's not a thing.
00:41:20.000 Okay.
00:41:20.000 What is a thing, though?
00:41:21.000 It could be a thing, though.
00:41:22.000 You could easily make that.
00:41:24.000 Yeah, well, they do as a joke, but it's not believable.
00:41:26.000 Like, they'll put tannerite in a teddy bear.
00:41:29.000 I think I sent you some links of that where they'll just like shoot a horse full of tannerite.
00:41:33.000 Yeah, this guy's shooting a stuffed horse full of tannerite.
00:41:36.000 Le Cheval?
00:41:38.000 Yes, that's the French word for a horse.
00:41:40.000 What are you doing?
00:41:40.000 Learning French.
00:41:42.000 That's better than that stupid German language. 1.00
00:41:44.000 Yeah, I'm starting now.
00:41:49.000 This one isn't that exciting.
00:41:52.000 So this is, when I looked, when I investigated tannerite stuffed dog, you just get stuff like this.
00:41:58.000 That's nothing.
00:41:59.000 Really?
00:42:00.000 Yeah.
00:42:02.000 That's cool.
00:42:03.000 I sent you the best tannerite video everywhere.
00:42:06.000 Any, what, ever, where this guy shoots a fridge and the fridge tries to kill him.
00:42:13.000 What?
00:42:16.000 Whoa! 0.71
00:42:18.000 Wowie kazoodles.
00:42:22.000 See, that's the kind of content I provide.
00:42:25.000 That's very good.
00:42:26.000 Did you rewind it?
00:42:27.000 It's obviously going to go into slow-mo.
00:42:29.000 Oh, okay.
00:42:29.000 Slow-mo, I mean.
00:42:34.000 Triple reviews.
00:42:36.000 Oh, my God.
00:42:39.000 Dude.
00:42:41.000 It's like someone of the Terminator when the fridges attack.
00:42:44.000 Boof.
00:42:45.000 That could have killed him.
00:42:46.000 Yeah.
00:42:48.000 Alright, I would have shit so hard I would have had permanent damage.
00:42:52.000 Permanent damage to my shitter.
00:42:54.000 So yeah, this has been a very weird show.
00:42:56.000 We started out with the Proud Boys politics stuff, people getting stabbed, going to jail, people doing fake accents, babies being murdered as a sexual fetish.
00:43:07.000 So let's wrap it up with some sanity from our viewers and dip into our male bag.
00:43:16.000 Hey, just pause.
00:43:18.000 You know, I just realized now with all this genderlessness, they talk about a woman's penis. 0.96
00:43:25.000 So you do have to specify is your scrotum male or female?
00:43:29.000 Male.
00:43:30.000 Because Caitlin Jenner has a female bag. 1.00
00:43:32.000 That's right.
00:43:33.000 And a female penis. 1.00
00:43:35.000 Did they call that a vagina? 1.00
00:43:38.000 Technically, it's a vagina. 1.00
00:43:39.000 Because that Jessica Tarnev chick was on Infowars and she was talking to Owen Schroer about her vagina, which is a penis. 1.00
00:43:47.000 And I think Vice had an article on how to perform oral sex on a woman's penis. 1.00
00:43:54.000 Apparently you don't suck it. 0.96
00:43:55.000 That's for men. 1.00
00:43:57.000 That's gay. 1.00
00:43:58.000 So I guess you somehow perform conilangus on the bag.
00:44:02.000 Meanwhile, there's a much more efficient way to do that.
00:44:06.000 Anyway, we're specifying.
00:44:09.000 Let's start the show.
00:44:10.000 This part of the show.
00:44:12.000 He's started the show already.
00:44:15.000 Good day.
00:44:15.000 Mailbag show.
00:44:16.000 Mailbag show.
00:44:18.000 Show the show.
00:44:18.000 The show.
00:44:19.000 This mailbag show.
00:44:21.000 Start this segment.
00:44:23.000 More of a segment.
00:44:24.000 Now it's starting.
00:44:25.000 Now we're in it.
00:44:26.000 Right.
00:44:27.000 Were our mics on when we were doing that?
00:44:28.000 It has begun.
00:44:30.000 Were our mics on?
00:44:31.000 Yes.
00:44:33.000 This one is a unique letter because I'm going to tell you my response.
00:44:38.000 Hi, Gavin.
00:44:39.000 I emailed Penthouse and GME about getting a refund.
00:44:42.000 Oh, sorry.
00:44:42.000 Let me start again.
00:44:44.000 G'day, Giv. 0.80
00:44:45.000 I emailed Penthouse and GME about getting a refund almost 12 months ago since the tour didn't seem to be happening at the time.
00:44:50.000 Since nothing has changed, here we are.
00:44:52.000 If you want to be known for shafting paying customers or associating with people who do, then there's no need to do anything.
00:44:59.000 That said, if you'd like to redeem yourself, could you please try and sort out a refund for me or at least point me in the direction of someone that will actually help?
00:45:07.000 Regards, Paul McCarthy.
00:45:11.000 The show is still on, I replied to him.
00:45:14.000 So fuck you and your refund. 1.00
00:45:16.000 Also, where the fuck do you get off emailing celebrities like they're your baby brother?
00:45:22.000 Would you expect a response if you emailed Iron Maiden about your goddamn tickets? 0.60
00:45:26.000 You're not relevant.
00:45:28.000 You don't control my reputation.
00:45:29.000 You're an insignificant shit stain with a very high opinion of himself because your parents did a terrible job.
00:45:35.000 Soon, this truth will hit you like a ton of bricks, and I'm glad.
00:45:38.000 Fuck you.
00:45:39.000 run through a mother f*ck a face. 0.99
00:45:41.000 Like that.
00:45:46.000 Anthony talks about this.
00:45:48.000 He says, Can you imagine emailing or tweeting at John Wayne?
00:45:52.000 I know I'm not a superhero legend like John Wayne, but you're the guy you bought the ticket to see, and you get to just email him and tell him, hey, you better fucking do something or you're going to be, I'm going to ruin your reputation.
00:46:04.000 How old is this shithead?
00:46:06.000 Can you come out of pocket with my refund even though you didn't receive any money for the ticket sales yet?
00:46:11.000 It's your problem.
00:46:13.000 And the show is on.
00:46:15.000 So deal with it.
00:46:17.000 Actually, I've been going back and forth with Damien Costa at Penthouse Australia about it.
00:46:23.000 My visas, we're about to put the visa through.
00:46:25.000 You know, it's millions of pounds of paperwork.
00:46:27.000 And yeah, it's taken an inordinate amount of time.
00:46:30.000 We were doing pretty well with Milo, and then Milo said something about the New Zealand shooting, and that brought us all back to square one.
00:46:37.000 So, what's that sound?
00:46:40.000 Sounds like a plane.
00:46:43.000 That's a weird sound.
00:46:47.000 I don't know.
00:46:48.000 It must be somebody dragging something.
00:46:50.000 Something monstrous and terrible.
00:46:56.000 Want another one?
00:46:57.000 Yeah.
00:46:58.000 A few years ago, I was celebrating about a decade in New York.
00:47:01.000 I'm a personal chef.
00:47:03.000 What is that sound?
00:47:06.000 It's not outside.
00:47:08.000 It sounds like it's our speaker feeding back.
00:47:10.000 I wouldn't say what's that sound if it was like...
00:47:14.000 What?
00:47:17.000 Is that an aircraft?
00:47:19.000 There's a plane just circling around the building?
00:47:22.000 Is this 9-11-2?
00:47:26.000 It's from you.
00:47:27.000 It's like speakers I think somebody Whoa What is that?
00:47:36.000 What are you talking about?
00:47:37.000 What is that?
00:47:40.000 Oh, my God.
00:47:43.000 Oh, my God.
00:47:45.000 You are the most gigantic pussy in the universe. 1.00
00:47:50.000 You are the vagina on a 650-pound life. 1.00
00:47:54.000 You are a vagina this big. 1.00
00:47:56.000 This is how you get cerebral palsy.
00:47:57.000 You're a gynecologist's nightmare. 1.00
00:48:00.000 What a pussy. 1.00
00:48:02.000 I want to be certain that's not real.
00:48:04.000 Where did that come from?
00:48:05.000 So I haven't worn this blazer in a while.
00:48:08.000 I come to work.
00:48:09.000 I'm walking around.
00:48:10.000 I feel something in the pocket.
00:48:11.000 It feels like a piece of poop.
00:48:13.000 Hand it to me.
00:48:14.000 And I go, did someone put feces in my suit?
00:48:18.000 And then I found this.
00:48:20.000 It's a hissing cockroach wind-up toy that you use to scare people.
00:48:28.000 And so I think, Ryan is a pussy.
00:48:31.000 I don't even have to do this.
00:48:32.000 I'm just going to leave it on his desk.
00:48:35.000 And that worked.
00:48:37.000 He just, I don't know if I can recreate what he did, but he just sort of went.
00:48:45.000 And then he started doing this contorting spat.
00:48:48.000 I did this.
00:48:48.000 I was like, like, really, really, really embarrassing.
00:48:54.000 That's a bug.
00:48:57.000 Huge.
00:49:01.000 Huge bug, frankly.
00:49:04.000 But that noise wasn't part of the gag, and I still, it's coming in and out.
00:49:07.000 You probably have some page open.
00:49:10.000 No, that is.
00:49:11.000 That's everything's a jack ma.
00:49:12.000 It sounds like somebody dragging something.
00:49:15.000 What, like in their building?
00:49:17.000 Yeah.
00:49:18.000 Or some construction being done or something.
00:49:20.000 Anyway, Detective Shitty.
00:49:22.000 That's my new nickname for Ryan because every theory he has is so bad.
00:49:26.000 Like the other day, it was 4 o'clock, and I go, oh, I got to go to this photo thing at 2.
00:49:30.000 And he goes, today?
00:49:32.000 Yeah.
00:49:33.000 That's why I'm starting up my time machine.
00:49:37.000 Or 2 a.m.
00:49:39.000 Yeah, I have to go to a photo shoot at 2 a.m.
00:49:41.000 I'm doing LA, there's some LA magazine, LA Weekly magazine that's doing a huge story on me.
00:49:47.000 So it could be a hit piece.
00:49:49.000 So should I, and I think, well, I mean, the studio is just down the street from our studio in Manhattan, Midtown.
00:49:56.000 So should I go over there and just pose for a hit piece?
00:50:01.000 We'll see.
00:50:02.000 Just doing the thing.
00:50:04.000 A few years ago, I was celebrating about a decade in New York.
00:50:07.000 I'm a professional chef, and up until that point, I considered myself a liberal.
00:50:09.000 That was until the dark and twisted version of the left began to transform into the insane mob that we see today.
00:50:15.000 I had worked hard and moved into a higher tax bracket, causing me to reevaluate my stance on taxes and politics.
00:50:21.000 Yeah, a conservative is a liberal who got mugged.
00:50:24.000 I was immediately and irrevocably red-pilled.
00:50:27.000 Then, Trump announced his candidacy, and New York City began foaming at the mouth.
00:50:34.000 The last straw for me came when a tattoo artist friend told another co-worker that he was pro-life.
00:50:39.000 A girl getting tattooed overheard this and promptly started an online campaign to boycott the shop and get him fired.
00:50:47.000 Well, it worked.
00:50:49.000 And with that, I decided to get out.
00:50:51.000 I moved to a small town in Upper Michigan because my girlfriend has family there.
00:50:55.000 It was the best decision I've ever made.
00:50:58.000 I walked into the kitchen on the first day of my new job, and there was more diversity there than I ever saw in New York.
00:51:05.000 In a New York restaurant kitchen.
00:51:08.000 There's that sound again.
00:51:12.000 It's like a radio feedback thing.
00:51:14.000 There.
00:51:23.000 You can almost feel it.
00:51:24.000 It's a physical moving of a thing.
00:51:27.000 Out of the four-person kitchen staff, there was a black guy, an Asian girl, a Mexican guy, and a white dude.
00:51:31.000 They were all wearing wedding rings, and it turns out they are all mega.
00:51:35.000 Then I started to notice some dramatic differences in people here.
00:51:38.000 People are kind to each other.
00:51:39.000 They smile in public.
00:51:41.000 People shake hands and say hello at the store.
00:51:44.000 People here love being American and value the family lives that they have built for themselves.
00:51:49.000 Everyone I work with makes a good wage.
00:51:51.000 We all work hard, but everyone understands that family comes first.
00:51:55.000 In New York, the concept of family seemed foreign to most people.
00:52:00.000 It always seemed like it never, never land.
00:52:02.000 So the two big things here is one, he starts making money and actually paying taxes.
00:52:05.000 Two, he gets a family and has kids and realizes how important things are.
00:52:13.000 Which is when you get pro-life, when you get conservative, when you start believing in God.
00:52:17.000 If this show comes out and there's a in the end, I'm not going to murder you.
00:52:24.000 I'm going to slowly kill everyone you know until you go insane and kill yourself.
00:52:28.000 I don't care.
00:52:32.000 Let me just adjust my camera.
00:52:36.000 You better hope and pray.
00:52:38.000 I don't know.
00:52:39.000 That's not a comment.
00:52:40.000 I took my headphones.
00:52:41.000 So when you are wearing headphones, off to hear it.
00:52:44.000 Sorry to bore you with all this minutia, folks, but we had, what, four days off?
00:52:48.000 So the first show is always rusty after a long break.
00:52:53.000 What you hear with your headphones is what the people at home hear, right?
00:52:55.000 Correct.
00:52:56.000 100%.
00:52:57.000 Correct.
00:52:58.000 I had to take my headphones off to hear it.
00:53:03.000 I took your advice and got married almost immediately after I realized that this was what the fabric of America really is all about.
00:53:10.000 This is such a great.
00:53:11.000 This one might be one of our best letters.
00:53:13.000 We are working on our first kid.
00:53:15.000 Sounds like a tough job.
00:53:18.000 My wife and I hold the same beliefs about conservative issues, and for that, I am very grateful.
00:53:22.000 There's also tons of cool shit to do here.
00:53:24.000 Just last week, we went to an antique tractor show.
00:53:27.000 There were tractor races, tons of food, and families wearing MAGA hats and shirts, all having a great time.
00:53:32.000 Leaving New York was the best decision I've ever made.
00:53:35.000 Thanks for everything.
00:53:36.000 So Northern Michigan, huh?
00:53:38.000 Upper Michigan.
00:53:39.000 Interesting.
00:53:41.000 All right.
00:53:42.000 Well, I think we're out of time, I'm afraid.
00:53:44.000 But before we go, I would like to introduce you to the richest man in China.
00:53:51.000 Now, the richest man in the world is apparently Jeff Bezos.
00:53:55.000 I don't know what's he worth, like $3 billion or $30 billion?
00:53:58.000 After it gets above $200 million, it kind of gets hard to spend.
00:54:03.000 Like, is someone who has $250 million poorer than someone who has $50 billion?
00:54:09.000 Is your lifestyle really that different?
00:54:11.000 He's $110 billion.
00:54:14.000 Jack Ma or Jeff Bezos?
00:54:16.000 Jeff Bezos.
00:54:17.000 $110 billion?
00:54:19.000 That's ridiculous.
00:54:20.000 What do you do with that?
00:54:22.000 That's one-tenth of a kajillion, right?
00:54:26.000 $110 billion.
00:54:27.000 You want to take a boat plane around the world?
00:54:30.000 It flies and goes underwater, and it's the size of a mini-mall.
00:54:35.000 We can bring up to 7,000 people.
00:54:38.000 Do you have 7,000 friends?
00:54:40.000 Do you want to eat gold bars and wear diamond shoes?
00:54:43.000 Yeah.
00:54:43.000 What the fuck do you do with that money?
00:54:46.000 Well, look up Jack Ma.
00:54:47.000 How much is Jack Ma worth?
00:54:49.000 Let me see.
00:54:50.000 Jack Ma, I think he made his money in construction.
00:54:54.000 $31 billion.
00:54:55.000 Oh, $31 billion.
00:54:56.000 That's not so much money.
00:54:58.000 That's nothing.
00:54:58.000 That's peasant noob shit.
00:55:02.000 Jeff Beato is a savage.
00:55:04.000 Jack Ma is a normie.
00:55:05.000 Total Normie noob.
00:55:08.000 So it turns out that Jack Ma is not just the richest man in China, he's also a retarded douchebag. 1.00
00:55:15.000 And this is what?
00:55:16.000 This is some company party he has, and he decides, I know it would be good for the entertainment.
00:55:22.000 No, actually, let's make this second.
00:55:24.000 First, let's do the Elon Musk one.
00:55:26.000 Where he's sitting talking to Elon Musk, and he's trying to sound profound.
00:55:31.000 And he says things like 99.99% of our predictions about the future are wrong, which I think we've been pretty good about the future with guesses.
00:55:40.000 And he also says he doesn't like artificial intelligence.
00:55:43.000 He prefers intelligence for individuals.
00:55:46.000 What?
00:55:47.000 Check it out.
00:55:48.000 I hate the word AI called artificial intelligence.
00:55:52.000 I call it Alibaba intelligence.
00:55:55.000 Yeah.
00:55:56.000 Oh, did he start Alibaba?
00:55:58.000 Or he owns Alibaba, that Chinese search engine?
00:56:01.000 Maybe, I don't know.
00:56:03.000 Might end up being true.
00:56:04.000 You never know.
00:56:07.000 Clearly, getting any information out, basically, with speech.
00:56:10.000 Yeah, I'm always amazed by what your vision about the technology.
00:56:15.000 I'm not a tech guy.
00:56:17.000 I think more about life.
00:56:19.000 I think AI is going to open a new chapter of the society, of the world, that people try to understand ourselves better rather than the outside world.
00:56:31.000 He makes fortune cookies for a living.
00:56:33.000 It's so difficult to predict the future.
00:56:37.000 99% predictions that human being had in history about the future, all wrong.
00:56:45.000 Including that one?
00:56:46.000 Oh, yeah.
00:56:47.000 Only, you know, the 0.00% of the prediction are right.
00:56:53.000 They're right because by accident.
00:56:56.000 Yeah, but it's also true that 80% of statistics are false.
00:56:59.000 Yeah.
00:57:00.000 So my meaning.
00:57:02.000 Cold room.
00:57:02.000 Come on, guys.
00:57:03.000 those drug that but it but is that i'm happy about the uh...
00:57:08.000 at the people Those people, I call them called college smartness.
00:57:20.000 People like us, street smart.
00:57:22.000 We're never scared of that.
00:57:23.000 We think it's a great fun and we want to change ourselves to embrace it.
00:57:28.000 I don't know, man.
00:57:29.000 That's like famous last words.
00:57:34.000 You couldn't evolve silicon circuits.
00:57:37.000 There needed to be biology to get there.
00:57:43.000 Good.
00:57:44.000 Good.
00:57:45.000 Well, let's talk about something fun.
00:57:47.000 What do you think about that?
00:57:48.000 Is autism contagious?
00:57:50.000 Because I'm worried.
00:57:51.000 I just came back from there, so.
00:57:54.000 This might be the biggest dork in the world.
00:57:58.000 I don't hate him.
00:57:59.000 No, he's not a douche.
00:58:01.000 No, he's not a douche.
00:58:04.000 He's totally useless.
00:58:06.000 So that's my view.
00:58:08.000 And also.
00:58:10.000 He's worth $19 billion, Elon Musk, by the way.
00:58:13.000 I hate to go to Himalayas too.
00:58:15.000 I mean, when you climb on the I think someday I will go there when the elevator is ready.
00:58:21.000 But that's my view.
00:58:23.000 Elon Musk has a cop head.
00:58:25.000 We will.
00:58:25.000 Yeah, he does.
00:58:26.000 All right, let's see Jack Ma celebrating, I don't know, 10-year anniversary of his company, and he chose himself as the entertainment.
00:58:34.000 And this is what you get to see when you work for Jack Ma.
00:58:37.000 Jack Ma?
00:58:38.000 I hardly know Ma.
00:58:43.000 The thing about Jack Ma is you don't really have to look hard to find clips.
00:58:48.000 100% of the time, he's the biggest dork in the world.
00:58:53.000 Dork doesn't feel quite right either.
00:58:56.000 Chief?
00:58:58.000 Boob? 1.00
00:59:00.000 Loser doesn't make sense.
00:59:01.000 Incompoop?
00:59:03.000 No.
00:59:05.000 Buffoon.
00:59:06.000 Nah, dork.
00:59:07.000 This isn't a buffoon.
00:59:08.000 Well, this is pretty buffoon.
00:59:09.000 Oh, no, buffoon, I guess, is like a sloppy...
00:59:18.000 He's on a motorbike?
00:59:20.000 With a mask?
00:59:22.000 What would you call Michael Scott from the office?
00:59:25.000 They're very similar.
00:59:26.000 Yeah.
00:59:28.000 A blowhard?
00:59:30.000 What does he do?
00:59:31.000 He's Michael Scott.
00:59:32.000 Right.
00:59:32.000 Yeah.
00:59:32.000 Jack Ma.
00:59:34.000 If you gave Michael Scott $20 billion, you'd have this.
00:59:40.000 Oh my God.
00:59:43.000 That would be a good show of the office.
00:59:45.000 He wins.
00:59:46.000 He has some amazing invention and he wins.
00:59:48.000 He becomes a billionaire.
00:59:49.000 He's a Dunderhead.
00:59:52.000 Michael Mifflin.
00:59:55.000 Look, he's wearing Michael Jackson's glove.
01:00:00.000 This is so brutal.
01:00:01.000 Ew.
01:00:04.000 Looks like me when I saw that bug.
01:00:10.000 Oh, no.
01:00:11.000 He's off rhythm.
01:00:13.000 He's just shaking.
01:00:17.000 This is the CEO of your company.
01:00:20.000 Oh, shit.
01:00:23.000 Hey, instead of spending $300 million on a party, can you just give us all a raise, please?
01:00:30.000 I don't really like care about lighting.
01:00:33.000 Guys, it's me.
01:00:35.000 It's me.
01:00:36.000 Big appraisal, Michael Scott Bishong.
01:00:41.000 But you didn't like to wiggle around to music, huh?
01:00:44.000 Yeah, totally.
01:00:46.000 He thinks that's magic.
01:00:47.000 Like, people go, what?
01:00:49.000 You can dance like that?
01:00:50.000 You shook your hips almost three times.
01:00:53.000 It's a magical display of lack of self-awareness.
01:00:59.000 That's his magic power.
01:01:01.000 With the power.
01:01:02.000 Totally oblivious.
01:01:03.000 The power to be invisible to myself.
01:01:08.000 Watch my shame.
01:01:09.000 Desapiro.
01:01:11.000 What do you think?
01:01:12.000 Oh my God.
01:01:13.000 Imagine we were in the audience.
01:01:15.000 I would be dead.
01:01:16.000 Yes, this is.
01:01:17.000 I would be laughing so hard, which is probably illegal in China.
01:01:20.000 He's got the face of like a discovered alien skeleton.
01:01:23.000 Yeah, he's got...
01:01:28.000 What's with his forehead?
01:01:32.000 He sits down in front of those caricature painters in New York City.
01:01:36.000 And they're just like, this is going to be easy.
01:01:37.000 So Alibaba's a search engine?
01:01:45.000 This is boring, by the way.
01:01:46.000 Yeah, this sucks.
01:01:47.000 Wait, so he opens the cages with the magic thing, and then tons and tons of his fellow co-workers come out.
01:01:56.000 This is unbelievable.
01:02:01.000 It feels so weird to call someone $20 billion a loser.
01:02:05.000 Yeah.
01:02:06.000 But he's a loser.
01:02:08.000 No, that is a big loser.
01:02:10.000 He's a loser.
01:02:10.000 That's a good way to put it.
01:02:12.000 Because you shouldn't be.
01:02:13.000 It's so hard to be a loser when you have that much money.
01:02:16.000 It's like Kim Jong-un.
01:02:16.000 Oh, this is Oh my god, this is so...
01:02:29.000 He couldn't hire like really good dancers, background dancers?
01:02:32.000 I think those are all the different executives at Alibaba.
01:02:35.000 Like the head of accounts is behind him.
01:02:37.000 That's how he claps.
01:02:38.000 Look at the clap.
01:02:41.000 So they're all working hard and they're making good salaries because they're the top executives in the country.
01:02:45.000 And he's saying, oh, no, it's Thursday.
01:02:47.000 We have to go to rehearsal from 5 to 10 p.m.
01:02:51.000 You can't see your kids today.
01:02:52.000 Right.
01:02:53.000 We have to keep working for this.
01:02:56.000 For this.
01:02:58.000 No one wants to be there.
01:03:00.000 No one is enjoying this.
01:03:01.000 No one on stage is having a good time.
01:03:03.000 And no one in the audience, what the fuck is he going to do now?
01:03:06.000 It's a big fucking head.
01:03:08.000 Now everyone at the company can punch me in the head as often as you want.
01:03:12.000 Wait, he has the strap.
01:03:13.000 Go back.
01:03:14.000 Yeah.
01:03:14.000 That's not his hair.
01:03:15.000 I think he has the strap hanging down.
01:03:17.000 Yes, he does.
01:03:17.000 So the strap, instead of like pulling it down, he just pushed it on his head.
01:03:21.000 So the strap is now...
01:03:25.000 He doesn't know how to put a helmet on.
01:03:26.000 Unbelievable, Op.
01:03:29.000 What an absolute fool.
01:03:33.000 He's the biggest fool I've ever met.
01:03:36.000 But yay, we love you.
01:03:38.000 Great show, boss.
01:03:40.000 Great show.
01:03:42.000 Hey, I love working here.
01:03:45.000 I love not seeing my family so I can rehearse a weird Michael Jackson mob dance that sucked.
01:03:51.000 I'm stunned.
01:03:52.000 So what's he doing?
01:03:53.000 Did he drive away in his motorbike?
01:03:55.000 This.
01:03:55.000 I don't.
01:03:56.000 Oh, there he is.
01:03:57.000 Well, he's going to ride his bike through them all.
01:03:59.000 Kill half of them.
01:04:00.000 Yeah, right.
01:04:00.000 Oops, sorry.
01:04:01.000 Hello.
01:04:02.000 Everybody's terrified.
01:04:04.000 Oh, maybe he puts the helmet on so a real guy can't dress the same.
01:04:10.000 What's he gonna do?
01:04:11.000 Jump over something?
01:04:12.000 This better end with something.
01:04:13.000 If he just drives away and they all go home.
01:04:16.000 This better end with a bigger explosion than the tannerite video.
01:04:18.000 What is this video?
01:04:20.000 We're way over time.
01:04:22.000 It's almost done.
01:04:25.000 That'd be funny if he gets in the cage with the motorbike and then all the walls fall down and then he drives off and everyone roars.
01:04:31.000 Wow.
01:04:32.000 He got out of the cage.
01:04:36.000 Is he gonna lift it up?
01:04:38.000 I don't know, man.
01:04:39.000 Yes.
01:04:40.000 He's lifting up his motorcycle cage.
01:04:43.000 Never thought a motorcycle could raise itself in elevation, huh?
01:04:46.000 Bet you didn't know I could fly.
01:04:50.000 This better end with Tannerite.
01:04:53.000 Tannerite CEO.
01:04:54.000 Biggest seller for the Boogaloo.
01:04:58.000 Wow.
01:04:59.000 What?
01:05:00.000 That's it?
01:05:01.000 Yeah.
01:05:02.000 That was craziness.
01:05:04.000 You know the craziness?
01:05:05.000 I've lived in China for a long time.
01:05:08.000 Not a long time, but I lived in China.
01:05:09.000 I guarantee you that no one there was laughing, and they all walked out saying, That was a great show.
01:05:15.000 Very good show.
01:05:16.000 That was a very interesting show.
01:05:17.000 Did you like the show?
01:05:18.000 Yes, I did very much.
01:05:18.000 It was very good.
01:05:20.000 Different culture.
01:05:21.000 They're very different than us.
01:05:25.000 Jack Ma, if you're watching, I don't know what your fellow workers are telling you.
01:05:29.000 I don't know what your advisors are telling you.
01:05:31.000 That was the worst, stupidest fucking show I've ever seen or anyone's ever seen.
01:05:39.000 It was like Cirque de Soleil for retards. 1.00
01:05:42.000 Buy retards. 1.00
01:05:44.000 I can't believe that you wasted all that money making such utter shit.
01:05:50.000 You are a billionaire Michael Scott.
01:05:53.000 And I'm now officially obsessed with you.
01:05:56.000 I'm going to be pursuing all things Jack Ma.
01:06:00.000 Be better.
01:06:02.000 Be better.
01:06:03.000 You couldn't be worse.
01:06:04.000 So there's nowhere to go but up.