Get Off My Lawn - Gavin McInnes - S03E04 - VICE [2020-08-27 - S03E04 - VICE]

00:00:07.000 A noodle morning after leaning back on my chair in the green sea spoon cafeteria from New York with gentlemen with the table telling jokes, playing with the salt, looking out the window.

00:00:24.000 Girl brings chickplates in full English above Carl grabs the phone like oi oi oi oi. 0.92

00:00:32.000 Hold it down, boy.

00:00:33.000 Your head's getting blurred.

00:00:34.000 That was The Streets.

00:00:36.000 Don't mug yourself, put out by Vice Wreckers around early aughts.

00:00:41.000 And very proud of that song, that album, that pic, that brand, Vice.

00:00:48.000 We're going to have a special Vice episode today.

00:00:54.000 Mixing it up, board of politics.

00:01:00.000 I am the only person on earth who has all the bound issues of Vice when it was good, which is around when I left 2006.

00:01:09.000 Well, 2006, I stopped contributing to the magazine as much.

00:01:12.000 2007 was petering down.

00:01:13.000 I don't have 2007.

00:01:15.000 I had more let Jesse Pearson handle everything at that point.

00:01:19.000 So though this says, I didn't make this shirt, by the way.

00:01:22.000 Though this says 2007, we're really going to go from the beginning to 2006.

00:01:27.000 Let me give you a brief background on the magazine, the media company, if you're not familiar.

00:01:33.000 Montreal, Canada is racist towards English people.

00:01:39.000 You cannot get a job there, not only if you are English, but even if you're bilingual, but when you speak French, they can detect an accent.

00:01:50.000 The opposite is not true.

00:01:52.000 In the rest of Canada, especially Ontario, if you go to a museum and you say to some, we call them Pepsis or Peppers because Pepsi was about five cents cheaper than Coke in the 80s.

00:02:04.000 So Quibikois are poor. 1.00

00:02:08.000 And they would always have Pepsi instead of Coke, so we call them Pepsis, Peppers.

00:02:11.000 So you go to some pepper in Ottawa, Ontario, in the museum, and you say, hey, do you know where the bathroom is?

00:02:17.000 She goes, what?

00:02:18.000 The bathroom, le restoire.

00:02:22.000 I forget what.

00:02:23.000 I forget what bathroom is in French.

00:02:24.000 Sal de bain.

00:02:26.000 And she'll go, oh, salt debain. 0.93

00:02:29.000 Okay, the bathroom is over there. 0.95

00:02:32.000 That's how bad her English is. 0.86

00:02:34.000 She's got a job. 1.00

00:02:35.000 But if you're like, bon jour, comment sauvage, je me pel gavin, je je faire boucout cho, je jour douis, they'd be like, oh, no, I can smell English in that.

00:02:44.000 You're not hired. 0.97

00:02:45.000 So it sucks to live there because it's like being white today in South Africa. 1.00

00:02:50.000 Like you're on little, there's little areas where you're allowed in. 0.96

00:02:53.000 If you have a sign that says Joe's shoes and it says chosur de joe, a little smaller, they have actual language police who come in.

00:03:04.000 They have Polaroids around their necks.

00:03:05.000 They take a Polaroid, they bring it, they show it to the City Hall.

00:03:09.000 These guys don't work for City Hall.

00:03:11.000 They're freelance.

00:03:13.000 And they go and they rat you out and then you pay a fine.

00:03:17.000 So Chosur de Jo has to be big.

00:03:19.000 Joe's shoes can be there, but it has to be smaller.

00:03:21.000 Of course, brands like McDonald's have a problem when they go there because they don't have an apostrophe S in French, so it has to be de McDonald.

00:03:28.000 McDonald's fought them. 0.99

00:03:29.000 That's fucking ridiculous. 1.00

00:03:30.000 And they won. 1.00

00:03:31.000 But that's what we're up against.

00:03:33.000 So anyway, my job there, I would tree plant. 0.86

00:03:36.000 I did comic books and I was a bike messenger and made shit money because all the French bike messengers got the good gigs. 0.79

00:03:43.000 So we were making terrible money. 0.96

00:03:45.000 If it wasn't for tree planting, I would have starved to death.

00:03:47.000 I actually ended up going to Taiwan to teach English to make some money, ironically.

00:03:52.000 But French people, they could do whatever they wanted there.

00:03:56.000 It's sort of like if the radical left won America.

00:03:59.000 If you want to see what it's like, I mean, they started out calling themselves blacks. 0.96

00:04:03.000 The FLQ, the terrorist group, said, we're the niggers of Canada, was their quote. 0.55

00:04:10.000 And so they see themselves as blacks, and their reparations are coast-to-coast bilingualism, grants, we pour money into that province. 0.99

00:04:18.000 Welfare, it's a shithole, and that's why they're all losers because they've been spoiled their whole lives. 0.99

00:04:25.000 They call Canada the Kak Canada. 0.99

00:04:29.000 So that's where we're starting.

00:04:31.000 Now, we've got to hustle.

00:04:33.000 If you're an English Montrealer, you've got to be hustling.

00:04:35.000 You got to have 10 things. 0.91

00:04:36.000 It's like blacks in Harlem. 1.00

00:04:37.000 There's always like 10 projects going on and a thing.

00:04:39.000 And we're having a show here.

00:04:41.000 We're promoting this thing.

00:04:42.000 And Dove Charney, the man behind American Apparel, perfect example.

00:04:47.000 Hustler, mover, Shmada Jew, takes over the world with his company. 1.00

00:04:51.000 Of course, he got fucked later on with Me Too and lies and manipulation. 0.99

00:04:55.000 But we started around the same time. 0.98

00:04:59.000 Him a little later than us. 0.79

00:05:01.000 So part of this culture of just funneling cash into Ontario, into Quebec, is there's bullshit grants like there's a diversity grant, tons of diversity money.

00:05:12.000 So there's not a lot of diversity in Quebec.

00:05:13.000 They have a thing called pure lang, pure wool, and you have to be French or you don't exist. 0.99

00:05:19.000 But Haitians are French. 0.98

00:05:21.000 So the only blacks in Montreal or Quebec are Haitians. 1.00

00:05:26.000 And if you're rich enough to leave a disgusting shithole like Haiti and come to Quebec, you're an aristocrat. 1.00

00:05:32.000 You've got literally an ascot. 0.99

00:05:34.000 You wear a scarf with your blazer.

00:05:36.000 Hello, how are you, darling?

00:05:38.000 Bon journey, comment. 0.97

00:05:42.000 And so the money ends up getting funneled to a lot of these blacks. 0.96

00:05:46.000 There's this grant called the Métu de Costa grant that's just like for Haitians.

00:05:51.000 So these Haitians go, yeah, we'll take your money. 1.00

00:05:53.000 And they set up a thing where they have a diversity calendar they sell.

00:05:57.000 And it tells you, like, there's the Puerto Rican Day parade.

00:06:00.000 There's the Dominican parade.

00:06:02.000 They don't have either of those, but you get the idea.

00:06:03.000 All these different cultures, dates.

00:06:06.000 And then they get another grant.

00:06:08.000 Hey, let's do this.

00:06:09.000 Let's have a newspaper, right?

00:06:11.000 You get it every month, and it tells you what the multicultural parades and various cultural events are going to be that month.

00:06:20.000 So June 1st, you get this dropped off.

00:06:24.000 And it arrives at your door and you see, oh, I'm Polish.

00:06:28.000 On June 4th, there's going to be the Polish parade, tons of money comes in.

00:06:32.000 They don't want to deal with that.

00:06:33.000 I think they don't care about any of this stuff, but they want the money.

00:06:38.000 So God knows how much they're getting.

00:06:39.000 Let's say half a million a year.

00:06:43.000 And then they go, but we can't afford to pay them.

00:06:45.000 Okay, don't worry.

00:06:46.000 The government will pay.

00:06:48.000 We'll find people on welfare and then we'll pay them out of our welfare money.

00:06:53.000 Yeah, okay. 1.00

00:06:55.000 Such a fucking scam. 1.00

00:06:58.000 What was his name? 1.00

00:06:59.000 Alex Laurent, I think was the guy behind it all.

00:07:02.000 Anyway, allegedly.

00:07:05.000 Anyway, so Sarush Alvi had just kicked heroin.

00:07:10.000 He died many times and he discovered Allah. 0.83

00:07:14.000 Let's say he discovered God.

00:07:16.000 I mean, everyone calls him a Muslim and everything, but, you know, he didn't, I never saw him pray once.

00:07:21.000 So I see him more as like me, a deist.

00:07:24.000 He just believes in God.

00:07:25.000 I'm a Catholic, but you know what I mean.

00:07:29.000 Yeah, he's about as Muslim as I am Catholic.

00:07:32.000 We tend to, we're not exactly very thorough.

00:07:37.000 But we believe in God.

00:07:39.000 So he is reborn and he wants to start his life now.

00:07:43.000 He's so happy he's alive. 0.89

00:07:44.000 And again, this guy would OD so many times that the EMTs would beat the shit out of him in the ambulance because they were so mad about having to bring him back again. 0.70

00:07:53.000 So he's starting a new life.

00:07:55.000 And he hears about this gig.

00:08:00.000 I can't remember how he got in there.

00:08:02.000 Maybe they agreed to pay him because I don't think he was on welfare.

00:08:06.000 And they explained to him what I just explained to you.

00:08:09.000 And he goes, okay, sounds good. 0.98

00:08:11.000 And in his head, he's like, I'm not fucking doing that. 0.93

00:08:14.000 I'll just make it like a skate hardcore. 0.96

00:08:16.000 And when I say hardcore, I'm talking about the music.

00:08:18.000 Like a skate punk mag.

00:08:20.000 And if they have to put a parade, a Polish parade in the corner, I'll do that. 1.00

00:08:25.000 Pretty cool, right?

00:08:27.000 And then he put together a mock-up of this, which I guess, and they didn't even look at it. 0.99

00:08:33.000 They don't give a shit. 0.99

00:08:34.000 They get the money. 1.00

00:08:35.000 It could have been all kiddie porn. 0.94

00:08:37.000 And they would have went, good work, Sarushla. 0.91

00:08:40.000 Okay, let's get that going.

00:08:43.000 So I give him the credit.

00:08:45.000 This is really what started the whole thing is he made a mock-up with fake ads and everything.

00:08:50.000 And then he went door to door saying, this is what my magazine is going to be like.

00:08:52.000 Can I get ads from you?

00:08:53.000 And he did.

00:08:54.000 He put out the first issue by himself.

00:08:58.000 That would have been 1994.

00:09:00.000 Now, maybe I was involved in the first issue.

00:09:03.000 Let me see.

00:09:05.000 And then, sorry, let me just finish the story.

00:09:07.000 So then about two years in, we go, we got to start making money.

00:09:12.000 Sarush and I aren't good at selling ads. 0.99

00:09:14.000 We fucking hate it. 0.98

00:09:15.000 And then I go, I grew up with this kid, Shane Smith. 1.00

00:09:18.000 He was always a hustler.

00:09:19.000 We called him bullshitter Shane. 0.76

00:09:21.000 He could sell swampland in Florida.

00:09:24.000 So he comes on and he starts hustling.

00:09:28.000 And that's great because Sarush, really, he just wanted to focus on the music.

00:09:31.000 He's got a gifted ear.

00:09:33.000 He discovered the streets that opened this whole show.

00:09:35.000 I had nothing to do with that.

00:09:36.000 In fact, I had very little to do with music for the majority of my time there because it's like a full-time job finding out the hot new band.

00:09:44.000 But I did.

00:09:45.000 I basically handled all the content for everything else.

00:09:47.000 I was female writers. 0.68

00:09:48.000 I was black writers.

00:09:49.000 We wanted a diverse group and it was too hard to find them.

00:09:52.000 So I was just them.

00:09:53.000 And I kind of regret that in hindsight.

00:09:55.000 Because if I'd used my actual name, you'd see how much I wrote of this magazine, which I guess no one else has these.

00:10:02.000 So it would be my kids and I can just tell them.

00:10:04.000 So who cares?

00:10:05.000 But when Shane showed up, we're focused on the creative stuff.

00:10:14.000 And he comes into our office and he goes, guys, something's not right here.

00:10:19.000 And I go, what do you mean?

00:10:20.000 And he goes, this is a scam.

00:10:23.000 They're not letting me, like, obviously to get ads, you have to put the, it was a newspaper back then, put the newspaper in an envelope and mail it to someone and go, here's our thing.

00:10:34.000 Would you like to advertise?

00:10:35.000 I mean, I can't fly around the province.

00:10:38.000 We were only in Montreal at that time.

00:10:42.000 And he goes, they won't give me stamps.

00:10:46.000 They won't pay for stamps.

00:10:48.000 And then we start realizing that they don't want us to grow.

00:10:51.000 This has to stay at this size.

00:10:54.000 This is fake.

00:10:55.000 Oh, I skipped a part.

00:10:57.000 So I talked to Suerush and he's like, I want you to edit the magazine.

00:10:59.000 And I say, no, I'm a cartoonist.

00:11:01.000 I do comic books, graphic novels.

00:11:04.000 So I'm not interested.

00:11:05.000 I could do your comic book editing and show you who, what cartoonists to get.

00:11:12.000 He's like, okay, that's not really helping.

00:11:14.000 I need something more than that.

00:11:15.000 So I said, sorry, dude, peace. 0.95

00:11:18.000 He hires some homo to edit the magazine. 1.00

00:11:20.000 And then I'm on my roof with my friend Eric DeGras. 0.95

00:11:23.000 We're smoking a joint.

00:11:24.000 And I go, do you ever want to like really conquer something?

00:11:26.000 Like really make your mark?

00:11:28.000 And he goes, not really.

00:11:29.000 And I go, I think I do.

00:11:31.000 Like, I'm sick of this.

00:11:32.000 I was selling pot at the time.

00:11:33.000 Like, what are we doing?

00:11:35.000 I want to make my mark. 0.98

00:11:36.000 And then I went, why the fuck did I say no to Sarouche? 0.98

00:11:39.000 That could have been huge. 0.99

00:11:40.000 That could have been my future.

00:11:42.000 And I said, no.

00:11:43.000 So I called him frantically and said, I need that job back.

00:11:46.000 And he goes, yeah, I already gave it away.

00:11:49.000 I go, you got to fire him.

00:11:50.000 And he goes, dude, it's, you know how complicated this whole thing is?

00:11:53.000 You've got to be on welfare and then you get on a make work program. 0.68

00:11:56.000 No problem.

00:11:56.000 I'll get on welfare.

00:11:58.000 Okay, well, call me back when you're on welfare.

00:12:00.000 I go to the welfare office, cross-eyed, and I fill out all the forms with my left hand. 0.78

00:12:06.000 They assume I'm retarded.

00:12:08.000 I am in and out of there in a heartbeat.

00:12:10.000 In fact, I think they gave me $100 cash.

00:12:13.000 Here's some money, dude.

00:12:14.000 I'm on welfare. 0.95

00:12:15.000 Like, the dumbest thing you can do is say, look, I'm sort of down on my luck right now, but I'm not a welfare kind of guy. 0.98

00:12:20.000 But no, no, no. 1.00

00:12:21.000 Be retarded. 1.00

00:12:22.000 I told Shane to do the same thing. 1.00

00:12:24.000 He did the exact same thing.

00:12:24.000 That's how we got on.

00:12:25.000 So we're sitting there on this weird government program, which people say, oh, so the government started vice.

00:12:30.000 No, dude.

00:12:30.000 We started vice despite the government.

00:12:32.000 Think of Soviet Russia. 0.59

00:12:34.000 You have no choice.

00:12:36.000 You're like a flower buried under cement.

00:12:38.000 You got to break through the cracks to grow.

00:12:40.000 That's what we did.

00:12:41.000 The cement didn't help us.

00:12:42.000 It hindered us.

00:12:45.000 So, yeah, Shane realizes it's a scam and we go, we got to leave.

00:12:49.000 And Alex finds this out and says he's going to sue us.

00:12:52.000 So we change the name to Voice of Montreal from Voice of Montreal to Vice.

00:13:00.000 And then we need a story to explain this. 0.99

00:13:02.000 So we lie to the media because we hate the media because they kept attacking us constantly, saying we're fucking losers. 0.99

00:13:08.000 We'll never go anywhere. 0.99

00:13:10.000 And so we said, yeah, Village Voice sued us.

00:13:13.000 And we had to change the name.

00:13:14.000 Canadians love an underdog story.

00:13:16.000 They love it.

00:13:17.000 So they didn't research it.

00:13:18.000 And we were coast to coast news, million articles about us.

00:13:22.000 And that helped us grow.

00:13:25.000 And here's another story, by the way, speaking of coast to coast.

00:13:27.000 So we were only in Montreal, and we wanted to go across Canada.

00:13:31.000 This Japanese guy at Cargo Records, Kevin Hajamoto or something, he said, hey, I got a great idea, guys.

00:13:37.000 I'll put your newspapers in my CD boxes when I mail record store CDs and then they can put them up there and now you're international.

00:13:45.000 Now you're national. 0.99

00:13:46.000 And we go, fuck, that's amazing. 1.00

00:13:48.000 Yes, thank you. 0.99

00:13:51.000 And so we call all these ads.

00:13:53.000 Shane does.

00:13:53.000 Shane was the ad guy.

00:13:55.000 Shane calls all these advertisers coast to coast.

00:13:57.000 He says, hey, we're in Vancouver now.

00:13:58.000 We're in Winnipeg.

00:13:59.000 We're in Halifax.

00:14:01.000 Let's get ads.

00:14:02.000 And we're no longer voice of Montreal.

00:14:04.000 Now we're voice.

00:14:05.000 Or I can't remember when.

00:14:06.000 Yeah, voice.

00:14:07.000 And then, like three days before, Japanese man says there's something wrong with that.

00:14:15.000 And he says, oh, it adds weight to the boxes.

00:14:19.000 So I can't do it.

00:14:20.000 Like doubles my shipping prices. 1.00

00:14:22.000 Yeah, we figured you had already looked into that when you made this offer, fuck nuts. 1.00

00:14:27.000 So we panic. 1.00

00:14:29.000 We step.

00:14:30.000 This is the key to being an entrepreneur.

00:14:32.000 This is the key to making money.

00:14:34.000 This part right here, because you're going to get obstacles.

00:14:36.000 You're going to get no's.

00:14:37.000 You're going to get, sorry, it's not happening.

00:14:39.000 You can't accept that.

00:14:41.000 You have to say, no, this is happening.

00:14:44.000 If you have to walk from A to B and they drop a million piles of snow on you, you guys got to burrow through the snow.

00:14:50.000 You're getting from A to B. So we call all these stores and within 24 hours, we set up a thing where I'm going to ship you a pile of newspapers.

00:15:03.000 And then next issue, you're going to distribute them everywhere.

00:15:05.000 And next issue, you're going to get a free ad.

00:15:08.000 And so maybe not with the first pile they get, but with the second pile, they have an incentive to get it everywhere because their ad is in it.

00:15:15.000 And that's how we went national.

00:15:19.000 This is all in this book, by the way.

00:15:24.000 And in my book, Death of the Cool.

00:15:26.000 Told this story many, many times, as you can imagine.

00:15:30.000 And yeah, we became a national magazine by exchanging ads for labor.

00:15:34.000 And that concept of going national happened in 24 hours, thanks to an emergency.

00:15:40.000 In fact, that adversity, Kevin kind of gifted us because we wouldn't have had the balls to call up all these stores across the country and set that up.

00:15:48.000 Now, how did we go international?

00:15:50.000 Well, we always lied to the press.

00:15:52.000 We hated journalists.

00:15:53.000 I still do.

00:15:54.000 And we do the interviews.

00:15:57.000 We get bored.

00:15:57.000 One time, Shane and I in Le De Voie, which is like the New York Times or Quebec, we said we were gay lovers.

00:16:03.000 We had been friends for a while, but we started tickling each other once as a joke.

00:16:07.000 And then the next thing you know, we're just facing each other and we just started kissing.

00:16:10.000 And in the article, we're embracing each other, staring into each other's eyes.

00:16:15.000 And that was a huge, you know, full-page story in the press.

00:16:18.000 This gay friends falling in love.

00:16:21.000 So another time he was doing an interview, and I had never heard of this dude, I think, Richard Sawinski.

00:16:26.000 And apparently he got, I don't know, in trouble with pyramid schemes and stuff.

00:16:29.000 But the story with Richard is he saw a CGI company in Australia, New Zealand.

00:16:35.000 I think they're called Animal Logic.

00:16:36.000 And he went, these guys are going places.

00:16:38.000 I'm going to buy them.

00:16:40.000 Immediately after, they did Jurassic Park and became the biggest thing in the world.

00:16:43.000 And he became a zillionaire.

00:16:45.000 So Shane said, yeah, Richard Sawinski is going to buy us and that's going to be cool.

00:16:51.000 And then Richard found out about it.

00:16:53.000 Why are you looking at pictures and not showing any of them?

00:16:57.000 You're just sitting here enjoying the show?

00:16:59.000 Like, you've looked at maybe 500 things that I've been talking about and not showing them to the viewers.

00:17:05.000 You're just like listening to a podcast?

00:17:09.000 Okay.

00:17:10.000 Thank you.

00:17:11.000 All right.

00:17:13.000 That's around the time this went down.

00:17:16.000 That's Shane on the cover in the wrestling mask.

00:17:24.000 Richard Swinsky heard about it.

00:17:25.000 He appreciated the hubris.

00:17:29.000 He invited us into his office and did something I still live by these days.

00:17:32.000 I call it the crayon contract.

00:17:33.000 When you get into business with someone, yes, there's lawyers who can write this much on what the cases will be.

00:17:39.000 But write a one-pager to each other about where you think this is going, what you think your company's worth, how much you want.

00:17:44.000 So we sold, I think we sold 25% for 250 grand to him.

00:17:52.000 We took the money, divided it by three, right?

00:17:55.000 80, whatever each.

00:17:57.000 And he owned 25% of the company.

00:17:59.000 That's how I remember it.

00:18:01.000 And soon after, he said, I want to move you to New York.

00:18:07.000 He had bought a bunch of, there was another digital company called Shift that he bought.

00:18:11.000 And he said, I want to move to New York.

00:18:12.000 And we go, why?

00:18:13.000 And he goes, because if you're big in Montreal, you're big in Canada.

00:18:15.000 You're big in New York, you're big in the world.

00:18:17.000 And we all went, done, I'm in.

00:18:20.000 But a lot of his other investments said, no.

00:18:23.000 No, I'll miss my girlfriend.

00:18:25.000 We're all like in our early 20s.

00:18:27.000 You get an opportunity to move to New York City, all expenses paid.

00:18:32.000 And you go, no, thank you. 1.00

00:18:34.000 What the fuck? 1.00

00:18:36.000 Dude, at that age, I would have moved to Hong Kong. 1.00

00:18:38.000 It's an adventure, right?

00:18:41.000 By the way, I've made a movie of all this that 20th Century Foxes shelved.

00:18:45.000 And Vice worked hard to have it shelved, I believe.

00:18:50.000 Anywho, so then we moved to New York.

00:18:54.000 It was on.

00:18:55.000 We were hemorrhaging cash.

00:18:57.000 That's us planning the move.

00:18:58.000 I wasn't excited about it.

00:19:00.000 I didn't feel good hemorrhaging cash.

00:19:02.000 It wasn't, because we'd always been cheap and we never spent more than we, if we made enough to print 40,000 copies, we printed 40,000 copies.

00:19:09.000 We had no debt ever.

00:19:11.000 Although we had to pay, I think $50,000 to the Haitians for the, I don't know why, because we were kids and he intimidated us and he said, my wife's a lawyer, I'll ruin you.

00:19:21.000 We went, okay, here's, let's pay you $50,000 over two years or something like that.

00:19:27.000 And then the money just stopped.

00:19:31.000 Con Ed came.

00:19:32.000 Our rent was $27,000 a month.

00:19:34.000 This is in 1999.

00:19:37.000 So it was a city block.

00:19:39.000 It was like Glenn Beck's New York studio, literally the same.

00:19:42.000 His rent is $100,000 a month.

00:19:44.000 That studio has been shut down.

00:19:46.000 And yeah, we were flat fucking broke, but it was worse than broke because he'd been spending money.

00:19:54.000 He got a global trademark for this logo, which, by the way, is just the NWA font traced again and again and again and fattened up in Adobe Illustrator.

00:20:06.000 We had paid for this to be a global trademark.

00:20:09.000 That's like 300 grand.

00:20:10.000 That's just one bill.

00:20:12.000 And that's global trademark lawyers you owe.

00:20:15.000 So we were way beyond, this was like the end of the Civil War for America.

00:20:19.000 We were probably, I'd say a million dollars in debt.

00:20:23.000 And Shane and Sarouche dealt with it.

00:20:25.000 I didn't deal with it.

00:20:26.000 I'm the content guy.

00:20:27.000 Sorry.

00:20:28.000 I don't do that.

00:20:30.000 And I think they always resented me for that. 1.00

00:20:32.000 But I was partying while they were dealing with this fucking nightmare. 0.98

00:20:35.000 Because I had to put out the magazine by myself. 0.99

00:20:37.000 That's how I saved money.

00:20:38.000 I kept everything going.

00:20:39.000 I learned graphic design, fired our graphics guy.

00:20:42.000 So I was writing the magazine, laying it out, basically handling 100% of what you see, you know, around 2002, which is really when it was at its best, right?

00:20:53.000 2004 was the peak, I'd say, 10-year anniversary.

00:20:57.000 Oh, and another thing, people always say, well, you lost all this money by leaving Vice.

00:21:02.000 It was not an amicable departure.

00:21:04.000 It wasn't like, sorry, guys, I'm out.

00:21:05.000 It became this horrible divorce.

00:21:07.000 And I made sure we were always at a certain height.

00:21:12.000 Like, you know, when Hoos Gerdu started shining to a mainstream label, Bob Stinson was pissed because he wanted to keep the music rocking.

00:21:20.000 And he didn't like that they were doing pop.

00:21:22.000 That's where I was at.

00:21:23.000 And I had, my goal was always, editorial and advertising have to be enemies.

00:21:29.000 They can't like each other.

00:21:30.000 They don't even hang out.

00:21:31.000 And they did this in Animal House.

00:21:33.000 The director of Animal House, Doug Kenney, said, or no, sorry, the writer, they said, let's get Animal House actors here 10 days early and they can party.

00:21:41.000 And then the evil fraternity will invite there, like Kevin Bacon, we'll invite them there day of, and then they'll hate each other's guts.

00:21:49.000 And that'll help the movie.

00:21:50.000 That was my goal.

00:21:50.000 I think good content is the opposite of an advertorial.

00:21:54.000 Eventually, you bend that enough and it's going to break. 0.99

00:21:57.000 When you cost like some poor bastard, some sales guy, you cost him $100,000 because you did a photo shoot, a fashion shoot where all the models were fucking. 0.99

00:22:08.000 You lose Yamaha. 1.00

00:22:09.000 Eventually the sales guys are going to get pissed off and say, fuck this. 1.00

00:22:13.000 So that's why I became... 0.99

00:22:15.000 And then when I left, Chain and the advertisers took over the content.

00:22:19.000 And I believe, my opinion is, or many opinions are, I have to be careful here.

00:22:24.000 I've signed a lot of documentation, that it became more of an advertorial thing, more of a appealing to whatever the hot advertising trend of the day was.

00:22:35.000 Like, I'm sure right now it's all about woke capitalism and Black Lives Matter and stuff. 0.95

00:22:42.000 But the interesting thing about Richard Sawinski is he brought in this concept of a multi-channel brand, he called it.

00:22:48.000 Now, we had a record label in Montreal, but it's just a joke, and it was on cassette, and it was for our friends.

00:22:53.000 We put out like 10 cassettes, and it wasn't real.

00:22:55.000 But he was like, now you need retail, you need a record label, you need a movie company, TV company.

00:23:01.000 And we kind of stuck with that even after he abandoned us and we had to rebuild from scratch.

00:23:05.000 And by the way, anyone who says we don't deserve what we got because the government started, well, what about when we rebuilt when we were a million dollars in debt and we had to move to Williamsburg, which is fucking scary back then?

00:23:16.000 This is like 2001.

00:23:19.000 And we were in Triple Five Soul storage space in their back with like boxes of coats next to us.

00:23:24.000 What about that?

00:23:28.000 So we kept the multi-channel brand.

00:23:30.000 We kept the label going.

00:23:31.000 And then when we finally built it back up, we still had all those things.

00:23:34.000 And that was ultimately why they became successful.

00:23:36.000 But as far as me leaving goes, after I left, it's a different company.

00:23:40.000 Totally different company.

00:23:42.000 So to say, oh, you should have stayed there, you'd be rich.

00:23:44.000 First of all, I did get quite a bit of money.

00:23:46.000 But secondly, that's like telling David Lee Roth, oh, he should have stuck with Van Halen.

00:23:50.000 They had a big hit with right now.

00:23:52.000 And no, that's not my Van Halen.

00:23:55.000 I'm David Lee Ross.

00:23:57.000 If they get Sammy Hager later, that's a different company now.

00:24:00.000 I wouldn't have ever got that Sammy Hager money.

00:24:02.000 You understand?

00:24:03.000 I wouldn't have survived there.

00:24:06.000 I would have got fired, got in trouble, be brave, and never stop fighting.

00:24:12.000 So that was around 2008 was when I left.

00:24:17.000 And by the way, this is a little sidebar that pisses me off. 0.53

00:24:19.000 So we started, we did the Vice Guide to Travel in like 2002 or something.

00:24:26.000 And then we started getting into doing more newsy stuff.

00:24:29.000 And I think there was a merger with CNN around 2005.

00:24:32.000 So that was when Vice News began, 2005.

00:24:35.000 I don't know why Tim Poole keeps saying that he started Vice News.

00:24:39.000 He was there for a year in like 2013 when Vice News had been around for almost a decade. 0.99

00:24:48.000 What the fuck are you talking about? 0.98

00:24:51.000 I mean, I respect Tim Poole and he does some great work, but that's just a lie. 0.99

00:24:55.000 It's just not true.

00:24:57.000 He's also clearly bald.

00:24:59.000 Guys with hats on in the summer. 0.99

00:25:01.000 Do you think we're dumb? 0.99

00:25:03.000 It's just a wool toupee. 0.99

00:25:06.000 All right.

00:25:07.000 So did I cover everything?

00:25:08.000 Yeah.

00:25:09.000 So that's Vice from 1994 to now.

00:25:13.000 So let's go through some of these old issues, shall we?

00:25:16.000 What do you say?

00:25:17.000 Let's do it.

00:25:20.000 This is the first issue of Vice ever.

00:25:23.000 Let me see how much I had to do this.

00:25:25.000 I can't remember if I came on.

00:25:26.000 Comic artists, Gavin McInnis, editor Sarouche Alvey, Alex Laurent, and Dominique Olivier.

00:25:32.000 They were the ones getting the money.

00:25:36.000 So yeah, I definitely contributed to this, and helped with the design.

00:25:42.000 But this was the first...

00:25:44.000 Oh, look, I did these comics.

00:25:46.000 God, I wasn't a very good cartoonist, was I?

00:25:49.000 Good things about Montreal.

00:25:50.000 There's good artists here.

00:25:52.000 There's babes everywhere. 1.00

00:25:53.000 There's always fun things happening.

00:25:54.000 Bad things about Montreal.

00:25:56.000 No one has any money.

00:25:57.000 Heroin is popular.

00:25:58.000 Cops are scary.

00:25:59.000 That's not funny.

00:26:01.000 I can use this.

00:26:02.000 What happens with this?

00:26:05.000 Here we go.

00:26:09.000 You just learned this technology now.

00:26:10.000 I'm impressed.

00:26:12.000 Oh, cool.

00:26:13.000 That's for zoom-ins and, you know.

00:26:15.000 So, this was 1994.

00:26:19.000 October of 94.

00:26:22.000 Way too much pointalism.

00:26:26.000 Look at that.

00:26:26.000 Very first thing, an interview with Johnny Rotten.

00:26:29.000 That's impressive.

00:26:31.000 So this was all Sarouche.

00:26:34.000 And this was...

00:26:35.000 This was, let's go back to the...

00:26:37.000 Oh, this was the diversity thing.

00:26:39.000 Here's a black barbershop.

00:26:40.000 Ebony et y voir.

00:26:42.000 Ebon et y voir.

00:26:45.000 Ebony and ivory.

00:26:46.000 And then, of course, we've got some calendars. 0.99

00:26:48.000 So this first issue is when I realized, what the fuck am I doing? 0.98

00:26:52.000 I got to get on board. 0.89

00:26:53.000 And we weren't doing the graphic design then.

00:26:54.000 Some Haitian dude was.

00:26:58.000 And you can see how bad it was.

00:26:59.000 Look at the font.

00:27:01.000 Voice.

00:27:05.000 Hip-hop.

00:27:07.000 Women in hip-hop. 0.57

00:27:10.000 Girls rock too. 0.79

00:27:12.000 I remember.

00:27:13.000 So that first one was sort of like a pilot.

00:27:15.000 This is a real one.

00:27:16.000 Oh, you know what?

00:27:18.000 This was my first, the first thing I ever wrote in my life is in the first issue.

00:27:22.000 And it's a review of our band Furnace Face.

00:27:25.000 Fluid Waffle kicked out Steve D'Anunzio because he was a crappy AM radio guy.

00:27:30.000 Five years later, they have Honest Engines, Marty Jones, his sampler, sold-out shows in every province except Quebec, and the name Furnace Face.

00:27:38.000 This is their third CD.

00:27:39.000 They seem to replace their white guy college funk with a much heavier sound that will make you happy. 0.99

00:27:44.000 Shit, even if you don't like it, there's plenty of little esoteric fillers you can play for your friends or put out on your answering machine. 0.99

00:27:51.000 And that sort of ended up defining vice after a while was that mode of not writing seriously and writing how you talk. 0.99

00:28:03.000 I invented that.

00:28:05.000 I invented writing how you talk.

00:28:09.000 And so for these old issues, you can sort of see these young guys struggling, trying to figure it out as they go.

00:28:17.000 Doing, look at this. 0.99

00:28:19.000 Holy shit, look how shitty this is. 1.00

00:28:21.000 Art and war. 1.00

00:28:22.000 Look at this picture.

00:28:26.000 This is like some, one of the writers, we couldn't pay for writers, right?

00:28:31.000 So you just, anyone who was willing to write, look how shitty this art and design is.

00:28:36.000 I think I'm the only person in the world with these issues.

00:28:39.000 Oh, I drew this.

00:28:45.000 The myth of the sea monkey.

00:28:48.000 And then, so now we're up to December.

00:28:50.000 We're starting to get better and getting good at it, if you will. 0.98

00:28:54.000 The design is still fucking disgusting. 0.99

00:28:57.000 There's an interview with a prostitute. 0.99

00:28:59.000 So if we're going to get through this in any sort of time, I'm going to have to speed it up here.

00:29:04.000 So we move along.

00:29:06.000 This is now, we're into 1995.

00:29:08.000 Oh, here's the most embarrassing thing we ever did.

00:29:12.000 And I'm completely responsible for it.

00:29:14.000 And every time I think of these old issues, I think of this article.

00:29:17.000 It's called Babes Invade Montreal. 1.00

00:29:21.000 And it's sort of the precursor to the do's and don'ts.

00:29:23.000 And I walked around taking pictures of really beautiful people because Montreal does have a lot of attractive women. 1.00

00:29:30.000 But I kind of got a buzz.

00:29:32.000 And so everyone was pretty to me. 0.99

00:29:34.000 And it's just the shittiest fucking collection of terrible photos. 0.99

00:29:39.000 Babes invade Montreal. 1.00

00:29:41.000 And there's nothing we can do to stop them.

00:29:43.000 As you may have noticed, walking around this fair city, Montreal is infested with more babes than Paris and New York combined. 1.00

00:29:49.000 Fine, fine babes.

00:29:51.000 And what a variety in all caps.

00:29:53.000 I wrote this.

00:29:54.000 Oh yeah.

00:29:55.000 And all photos by Derek Backles. 0.98

00:29:58.000 Look at these shitty, useless things. 0.96

00:30:01.000 Like, what is the point of this? 0.99

00:30:04.000 This is probably the worst thing we ever did.

00:30:07.000 Like, what's this point?

00:30:09.000 Why is this here?

00:30:11.000 Why is he here?

00:30:12.000 Here's a guy in a Quebec shirt. 0.97

00:30:14.000 Here's some homos hanging out. 1.00

00:30:18.000 That was definitely a low point.

00:30:20.000 So this is when we started getting good.

00:30:22.000 The one-year anniversary, Crispin Glover on the cover.

00:30:26.000 Oh, then this is when we started do's and don'ts.

00:30:28.000 It was like vice boy, vice girl of the month.

00:30:31.000 Oh, the GoPros out.

00:30:36.000 Oh, you know what's a fun tip?

00:30:38.000 This chick, Jen, she introduced me. 0.53

00:30:42.000 I ate her out and did an exquisite job. 1.00

00:30:44.000 And I call that leaving a business card in a vagina. 1.00

00:30:47.000 And she ended up talking to this chick, Emily, who I met at a party. 0.98

00:30:52.000 And I ended up going home with Emily.

00:30:53.000 And now she's my wife and we have three kids.

00:30:55.000 So eating this chick out got me a family. 1.00

00:30:58.000 And then partying with this guy, Charles, was really fun.

00:31:03.000 And then he started doing heroin.

00:31:04.000 And now he's dead.

00:31:06.000 Wow.

00:31:06.000 He OD'd.

00:31:08.000 Which was not uncommon back then.

00:31:10.000 This is where we start getting good.

00:31:11.000 We hired this designer, secret meaning of woo.

00:31:15.000 You can see a sense of design happening now, but it's still pretty corny stuff.

00:31:19.000 Check out Lowriders.

00:31:22.000 I started doing the covers.

00:31:24.000 This was our friend Rupert drew this.

00:31:26.000 And now we're making some traction here.

00:31:30.000 And getting real ads and getting good at it, if you will.

00:31:35.000 Stalking the gay scene by Susie Who.

00:31:39.000 People scared to use their names.

00:31:40.000 And this, now it's getting fun.

00:31:43.000 And I really believe in learning as you go.

00:31:46.000 Like, we could have just sat at home and practiced and practiced until we were this good.

00:31:50.000 And this was, what, 1996?

00:31:52.000 So two years it took to get this kind of vibe.

00:31:56.000 Euthanasia, get it.

00:31:58.000 But I don't like that.

00:32:01.000 I'd rather just, you know, figure it out as you go. 0.99

00:32:03.000 You could read about snowboarding, or you could just get on the top of the hill, tie a pillow to your ass, and wait until you figured it out through trial and error. 0.99

00:32:11.000 Same with bands. 0.98

00:32:13.000 So now we've got two years in, we've got our thing.

00:32:15.000 We've got the tidbits at the beginning.

00:32:17.000 That was always fun to do.

00:32:19.000 I interviewed Curtis Mayfield. 1.00

00:32:21.000 This was a fucking... 0.99

00:32:24.000 At one point I said, so why in a wheelchair? 1.00

00:32:28.000 Did we include that?

00:32:29.000 Oh yeah, This also makes me cringe when I remember it.

00:32:33.000 So, a lighting fixture fell on Curtis Mayfield's head.

00:32:35.000 You know, Curtis Mayfield, right?

00:32:37.000 Superfly.

00:32:38.000 Yeah.

00:32:39.000 And he's paralyzed.

00:32:40.000 And I thought, I got to get him to talk about that.

00:32:42.000 So I pretended I didn't know.

00:32:44.000 And he's like, Yeah, it's very important whether it be black or white to own as much of themselves as possible. 0.96

00:32:50.000 This guy started the whole concept of indie labels.

00:32:56.000 The music business has always been one-sided, where the producer and the writer have never had a stake in the publishing rights and production points that make the big money in the long run.

00:33:04.000 I'm happy to see young people get wise to that.

00:33:06.000 What about all those Curtis Mayfield tribute albums with monsters like Michael Bolton?

00:33:10.000 Don't you think they're blasphemous? 1.00

00:33:11.000 What a dumb. 1.00

00:33:12.000 Why am I talking to him like he's a bro? 1.00

00:33:15.000 How can it be blasphemy?

00:33:16.000 I've been in this business 35 years and the love and respect I've received since my accident has given me longevity. 0.99

00:33:22.000 Then I did this shit move that I still think about. 0.99

00:33:25.000 What, fucking 25 years later? 1.00

00:33:28.000 What accident? 1.00

00:33:30.000 Oof.

00:33:31.000 Oh, that was over six years ago.

00:33:33.000 I'm sure you know by now.

00:33:34.000 Yeah, you were hit by a lighting fixture or something?

00:33:37.000 I was going on stage in New York in front of about 10,000 people.

00:33:41.000 It was an outdoor affair.

00:33:42.000 I can't really say what happened because all I know is I was walking towards the front of the stage with my music playing.

00:33:47.000 And when I came to, I found myself to be paralyzed.

00:33:52.000 An eloquent way to put that.

00:33:57.000 And so we go for the first couple years. 0.97

00:34:01.000 I don't know how the fuck are we going to get through 15 years. 0.95

00:34:08.000 Let's just move faster. 0.97

00:34:09.000 How's that?

00:34:09.000 These books, by the way, these are the same book, Greatest Hits.

00:34:13.000 This, I was trying to do a sticky fingers thing.

00:34:16.000 This is when I was doing all the design. 0.98

00:34:17.000 There's my gorgeous balls. 0.96

00:34:22.000 So we won't go through those. 0.97

00:34:24.000 The Do's and Don'ts book.

00:34:25.000 I don't know.

00:34:26.000 I saw this in a store recently and it was low-res.

00:34:28.000 A lot of the pictures.

00:34:31.000 You think when you go with a book like Warner Books, they're going to know what they're doing, but no.

00:34:36.000 And this was really, this was the beginning of the end.

00:34:39.000 Did you ever have bootlegging?

00:34:40.000 People bootlegging your stuff?

00:34:42.000 Nope.

00:34:42.000 It's too expensive to print something.

00:34:46.000 This is when I noticed Shane and Sarouche were getting involved in editorial.

00:34:51.000 And I thought, why do you guys care all of a sudden?

00:34:53.000 What year was this?

00:34:55.000 And my thing with the photo books, we had a photo issue once a year.

00:34:59.000 And my thing was always, look, you want to just do a full page or even a double page spread for everything.

00:35:07.000 But so, but you don't want, that's only like a few photographers.

00:35:12.000 So let's have some pages that are unbelievably busy and then some pages that are stark.

00:35:16.000 That's how I did all the photo issues.

00:35:18.000 I like the way it looked.

00:35:19.000 And then those guys were going, no.

00:35:21.000 And this is really like, look at this.

00:35:24.000 It's the photo issue.

00:35:25.000 Shane and Sarusha have had almost nothing to do with content.

00:35:27.000 And here we go.

00:35:28.000 Shane Smith is writing the intro to the photo issue.

00:35:31.000 Like I used to beg those guys to contribute.

00:35:34.000 And then they have Sarush is next.

00:35:37.000 And then I'm back last talking about all the different issues we've had.

00:35:41.000 This is actually a good...

00:35:42.000 I haven't looked at this book because it pisses me off.

00:35:46.000 But this is a good look at all our issues.

00:35:51.000 So you just saw that one, this one.

00:35:55.000 We're about to get to these.

00:35:57.000 I would just go to National Geographic and take photos and steal them.

00:36:01.000 Would you recolor them or something?

00:36:03.000 Just a little bit.

00:36:04.000 I mean, that's just a picture from National Geographic.

00:36:07.000 So is that.

00:36:08.000 So is that.

00:36:09.000 I just stole it.

00:36:10.000 That's hilarious.

00:36:11.000 Yeah.

00:36:12.000 Well, that's the original Google image everybody's ripping.

00:36:15.000 Yeah, I guess.

00:36:15.000 Before that.

00:36:17.000 And this is when we became, we started going national.

00:36:21.000 You know who that is?

00:36:22.000 That guy ended up being King Khan, who's got a great music career now in Germany.

00:36:27.000 He's married to some German Playboy model.

00:36:30.000 This chick was hot. 1.00

00:36:31.000 I'd often, this is seen as sexist, but I'd often seduce girls by getting them in the magazine. 0.96

00:36:39.000 And that's not quid pro quo.

00:36:42.000 It's you'd be talking to them and you'd get to know them at the photo shoot, etc.

00:36:47.000 And the next thing you know, you're going on a date.

00:36:49.000 It's not like bang me and you can be in a magazine.

00:36:53.000 Although that's how some dits at the New York Times portrayed it.

00:36:56.000 It was actually pretty feminist back then. 1.00

00:36:58.000 I mean, the roots were punk rock.

00:37:01.000 And now we're in New York City here, 2000, right?

00:37:06.000 We've moved to New York City with this issue.

00:37:09.000 Always punk stuff.

00:37:11.000 There's Dash Snow doing Coke.

00:37:13.000 He also OD'd on heroin.

00:37:14.000 We've had 12 people that we used to work with OD on heroin over the years.

00:37:20.000 That's meeting Terry Richardson, which I thank Jesse Pearson for that.

00:37:24.000 He became an integral part of the brand. 0.99

00:37:29.000 This issue looks stupid. 0.99

00:37:30.000 It's a bunch of New York doors. 1.00

00:37:32.000 Don't be cluttered.

00:37:33.000 And also, a thing I always thought was important, and they stopped doing this after I left.

00:37:38.000 Put what's in it on the front.

00:37:40.000 And they go, no, it clutters it up.

00:37:41.000 Yeah, but if you're an avid fan, then you go through your issues and you're like, which one is the Curtis Mayfield one or the Black Alicious one?

00:37:49.000 And then you can see it on the cover.

00:37:50.000 It makes it easier to sort and find.

00:37:52.000 That's why we do write-ups on censored.tv because I want you to go, wait, what was that one where they were making fun of geckos?

00:38:00.000 And you can find it.

00:38:02.000 Min Kim. 1.00

00:38:03.000 That girl was a fucking smokeshow. 1.00

00:38:06.000 There's Terry. 1.00

00:38:07.000 See, you can't, this is why Terry was pilloried. 0.81

00:38:10.000 Because he was fun and he was sexual. 0.99

00:38:13.000 And it was like the 80s with him, like Burt Reynolds and Lonnie Anderson, girls having their tits out and stuff. 0.99

00:38:19.000 That's who I am. 0.98

00:38:21.000 And that's not acceptable anymore.

00:38:22.000 Men can't be proudly sexual.

00:38:24.000 Well, I grew up with like Burt Reynolds as a centerfold in Playgirl. 0.92

00:38:29.000 Sex was like fun when I grew up. 0.97

00:38:32.000 And now it's just like it means rape. 1.00

00:38:35.000 That's a funny sloth. 0.88

00:38:36.000 We had a really cool printer back then.

00:38:38.000 He was really happy to get us.

00:38:40.000 So they were pulling out all the stops with extra things like, look at this.

00:38:44.000 It was a, well, this is a scan of it, but this was, and this will be in there.

00:38:48.000 It was like a mirrored cover you could do Coke on.

00:38:54.000 And then we started getting really ambitious, like covers that would fold out.

00:38:58.000 This chick, during this shoot, And this became a poster in one of our stores that was like 15 feet by 10 feet. 0.99

00:39:05.000 I go, Holy shit, you look so fucking hot. 0.99

00:39:07.000 As Terry was photographing her, I was saying that to her. 1.00

00:39:10.000 And then she just got possessed with lust. 0.83

00:39:14.000 And she went from a model posing to like a horny person. 1.00

00:39:17.000 And it was like a switch had been flicked. 1.00

00:39:19.000 And she went, I got the sweetest fucking pussy you ever had in your life, Fawn. 1.00

00:39:23.000 I got a sweet, sweet fucking pussy. 1.00

00:39:25.000 You want to put that guy? 1.00

00:39:26.000 And I was like, whoa, whoa, whoa.

00:39:28.000 It was like the exorcist.

00:39:30.000 Like you did an incantation.

00:39:31.000 Yeah.

00:39:32.000 This is Ed Templeton on the cover.

00:39:34.000 We had four different covers that we put out.

00:39:37.000 And you only had this big cover if you collected all four.

00:39:41.000 That'd be a fun thing to frame.

00:39:43.000 I might do that. 0.97

00:39:48.000 There's some Terry tits. 1.00

00:39:50.000 This one was cool. 0.98

00:39:51.000 You could scratch off the gold to see the cross underneath.

00:39:58.000 This guy.

00:39:59.000 I'll see if I can zoom in.

00:40:01.000 This guy showed up at Terry Richardson's bachelor party for his first marriage.

00:40:06.000 Those are all Terry's Slayer shirts.

00:40:08.000 Or maybe it's his Slayer shirts.

00:40:10.000 Terry and him collected them.

00:40:11.000 He's Iranian.

00:40:12.000 He doesn't do any drugs.

00:40:14.000 And he showed up to the bachelor party.

00:40:17.000 That was Terry's assistant there.

00:40:18.000 Do you know him?

00:40:20.000 Do I?

00:40:21.000 Yeah.

00:40:22.000 No.

00:40:23.000 Oh, I thought you guys knew each other. 0.95

00:40:26.000 He shows up to Terry's bachelor party, and it's all he had got a bunch of strippers and prostitutes and stuff. 0.99

00:40:33.000 And he also got a bundle of heroin.

00:40:37.000 Yes.

00:40:38.000 So the guys break out the smack.

00:40:40.000 They're snorting it, shooting it. 0.97

00:40:41.000 There's naked chicks everywhere. 1.00

00:40:43.000 It's awesome.

00:40:43.000 And then within about 20 minutes, every dude is asleep.

00:40:48.000 So this guy shows up, and there's just these bored naked chicks snorting Coke, talking to each other in like what looks like part of the Holocaust. 1.00

00:40:57.000 Just like not literally dead bodies, but possibly about to be.

00:41:02.000 So he just parties with them. 0.99

00:41:04.000 He doesn't do drugs or drink, but he fucks them like crazy. 1.00

00:41:06.000 He's tits in his face, and he's like sitting on guys. 1.00

00:41:09.000 Like, I don't mean sitting on their dicks. 1.00

00:41:11.000 I mean they're just furniture. 0.99

00:41:13.000 So he's like, he's like falling on top of some dude who's not even waking up. 0.99

00:41:17.000 His elbows in the guy's chest as he's like having sex with a woman. 0.99

00:41:21.000 So he basically had sex in a war scene. 1.00

00:41:25.000 There's Dash Snow again. 0.73

00:41:26.000 He was a real integral part of the brand.

00:41:29.000 He really defined it, Ryan McGinley.

00:41:30.000 And I got to be honest, this is 2002 when we were building ourselves back up again and we didn't have a billionaire funding us. 0.99

00:41:36.000 And that really was, I was having the time of my fucking life. 0.96

00:41:39.000 We didn't have that many advertisers. 0.99

00:41:41.000 We had no one looking over us.

00:41:42.000 We could do whatever we want.

00:41:44.000 And I really thrived in New York.

00:41:47.000 It might have been because I'm documenting all these artists and funsters. 0.99

00:41:52.000 And so they want to kiss my ass or they want me invited to things so it's documented. 0.97

00:41:56.000 Shane and Sarouche didn't really seem to amalgamate with New York. 0.99

00:42:00.000 They didn't seem to get, like, I never saw them out.

00:42:05.000 They never really assimilated.

00:42:10.000 But yeah, that's when hipsters were created. 0.97

00:42:13.000 I created hipsters because we kept doing the do's and don'ts, right?

00:42:17.000 And that's like a do and a don't a day.

00:42:19.000 Here's the do's and don'ts issue.

00:42:21.000 You don't need to see me on these. 0.99

00:42:23.000 Kill me. 1.00

00:42:27.000 Hello? 1.00

00:42:28.000 What are you doing?

00:42:30.000 No, it was better before. 1.00

00:42:32.000 I can't kill you like that. 1.00

00:42:33.000 You can't kill me? 1.00

00:42:34.000 Because the rotation. 0.98

00:42:35.000 The rotation.

00:42:36.000 That's Ryan McGinley.

00:42:37.000 Let me see here.

00:42:45.000 This inspired The Vice Guy to Travel.

00:42:47.000 That was what?

00:42:48.000 2004.

00:42:50.000 Which then inspired Vice TV. 0.99

00:42:52.000 This issue really started all that shit. 0.99

00:42:56.000 Wait, where am I going with all this? 0.99

00:42:57.000 Oh, yeah, The Do's and Don'ts was saying a do and a don't of what to wear back and forth.

00:43:01.000 And it was very egalitarian. 0.78

00:43:02.000 Like, it wasn't like handsome jocks, Giselle Bunchen, and what's his name, the football guy, as do's, and then an ugly fat chick as a don't. 1.00

00:43:10.000 It was the opposite of that. 0.97

00:43:12.000 It was, you know, bigging up weirdos and mocking normies.

00:43:16.000 And I think that defined, it ended up defining a subculture.

00:43:19.000 And the next thing you know, you had hipsters.

00:43:21.000 And Williamsburg became gentrified because all the artists wanted to move down to be where all the vice stuff is.

00:43:26.000 Look at this.

00:43:28.000 You couldn't do that today.

00:43:29.000 The hate issue, starring Terry Richardson's manager, Seth Goldfarb, as El Duce.

00:43:38.000 This is the horror issue.

00:43:40.000 I drew that font.

00:43:42.000 I think it looks pretty good.

00:43:46.000 Here's a weird one.

00:43:48.000 My mother was furious about this. 1.00

00:43:50.000 She said it promotes pedophilia, and you can tell that's meant to be a blowjob. 1.00

00:43:54.000 I go, mom, this is saying more about you than this. 0.99

00:43:58.000 That never occurred to me when I saw this.

00:44:00.000 This guy does hair and makeup, and he's one of the most alpha tough dudes I ever met in my life. 0.99

00:44:07.000 That's a great way to fuck models is just to get in the industry. 1.00

00:44:10.000 Jerry Sue, we start doing the photo issues in 2005. 0.99

00:44:16.000 Look how gifted Ryan McGinley is. 0.93

00:44:19.000 I beat the shit out of him, though. 0.99

00:44:22.000 This is one of my favorite issues. 0.99

00:44:24.000 And people always say, like, when did you get conservative?

00:44:26.000 Well, 9-11 really changed me and made me more politically active and very dubious of Islam. 1.00

00:44:32.000 But we've always been like this.

00:44:34.000 You know, I wrote for the American conservative in the early aughts, saying it's hip to be square, talking about conservative culture and how we're pro-stuff.

00:44:44.000 Uh-oh.

00:44:50.000 So that's the Wheel of Cops issue in 2006.

00:44:56.000 What else do we got here?

00:44:57.000 Gangs versus Cults.

00:44:59.000 This is when I thought I was going to be doing more Vice TV stuff, so I started getting Jesse Pearson involved more.

00:45:09.000 Oh, God.

00:45:12.000 So I started getting Jesse Pearson involved in taking over the issue.

00:45:16.000 And that's when he started doing stuff I don't like.

00:45:19.000 So this is 2006.

00:45:21.000 I'm starting to, I want to hand over the company, but I want him to do it my way.

00:45:26.000 And this kind of thing pissed me off.

00:45:27.000 Gangs versus cults.

00:45:29.000 Because there's no write-up there.

00:45:31.000 Can you see that?

00:45:33.000 Are we doing it right?

00:45:35.000 I've got to flip it.

00:45:38.000 Like, where's the write-up?

00:45:42.000 And this is when we started doing themed issues, which I think was a big part of Jesse's idea.

00:45:46.000 And I really liked it.

00:45:47.000 The election issue.

00:45:52.000 This was for the photo issue, just 45 hot chicks. 1.00

00:45:54.000 The Iraq issue.

00:45:56.000 I'm having less and less to do with it.

00:45:58.000 I kind of see this as my last issue, really.

00:46:01.000 The We Love Cops issue.

00:46:02.000 It was cool.

00:46:03.000 We have it here. 0.99

00:46:04.000 One of my favorite parts of that issue is we had a double page spread, and it showed a cop standing there with little arrows showing all of his shit. 0.99

00:46:13.000 Let's write this down, actually. 0.97

00:46:16.000 This was volume 13, number 6. 0.99

00:46:21.000 And it showed like his belt, his fucking walkie-talkie, all the crap these guys are forced to carry is amazing. 0.99

00:46:33.000 And around now, I'm basically gone. 0.99

00:46:35.000 Like, this is getting a little too gay for me. 0.98

00:46:38.000 Photo issue.

00:46:42.000 Now I'm gone.

00:46:44.000 The animals issue.

00:46:45.000 Jesse was really into cats.

00:46:47.000 In fact, he left, after he left Vice, he started doing a magazine called Cat Holic, and it's spelled like Catholic, which I'm not a fan of.

00:46:56.000 Not a fan.

00:46:57.000 Now I don't recognize this magazine anymore.

00:47:01.000 And yeah, this is...

00:47:05.000 Oh, this is a great...

00:47:06.000 This is Ryan at his peak.

00:47:08.000 Well, not his peak.

00:47:08.000 This is when he was just starting.

00:47:10.000 Got dashed snow.

00:47:12.000 Next to the Williamsburg Bridge, you could die so easily there.

00:47:14.000 There's nothing but water below him.

00:47:16.000 Sam Sigalnik, this is him riding his bike to the World Trade Center on September 11th.

00:47:22.000 Sam started the whole white jeans thing.

00:47:25.000 Sam is kind of responsible for skinny jeans.

00:47:28.000 Because in the late 90s, early aughts, he was buying white jeans at this place, Dave's on 6th Avenue, but they're too big.

00:47:36.000 So he would have them taken in and they would always overdo it.

00:47:39.000 And the next thing you know, you had all these kids wearing skinny white jeans.

00:47:45.000 So that's all Ryan.

00:47:46.000 There's Terry Richardson.

00:47:48.000 I should probably say warning, boobies. 1.00

00:47:51.000 This is a funny thing, too, about him being a sexual predator. 0.99

00:47:55.000 Like, he did as much gay stuff as he did straight stuff. 0.99

00:48:02.000 Roe Etheridge, very hoity-toity. 0.95

00:48:06.000 Once he made fun of me for having a foreskin, which I thought was odd.

00:48:10.000 Jerry Sue is just awesome. 1.00

00:48:12.000 I've stolen some of his stuff.

00:48:15.000 Pat O'Dell did my wedding.

00:48:17.000 Jamie James Medina.

00:48:18.000 This was one of the most iconic vice photographs.

00:48:21.000 My mother did a watercolor of it once.

00:48:24.000 Pete Best.

00:48:26.000 Oh, this was a really cool photo that we had in the magazine.

00:48:28.000 This fat chick, Jamie Warren, really talented. 1.00

00:48:30.000 Doesn't that look awesome? 0.96

00:48:35.000 Although that was kind of Ryan, Ryan McGinley, with his taking pictures of himself while he barfed.

00:48:42.000 Oh, this was a cool issue.

00:48:43.000 We gave people different drugs and then photographed them and then interviewed them when they're on the drugs.

00:48:49.000 Look at this guy on ketamine.

00:48:57.000 This was a very important issue to me, was the special issue where we got seriously handicapped people to hang out with Terry and they each got to write their own article and direct it.

00:49:10.000 This cover folded out to one, two, three, four, five different things.

00:49:15.000 They did a show together called How's Your News.

00:49:18.000 And there's Susan. 1.00

00:49:19.000 We were good friends until she was a bitch to me. 1.00

00:49:22.000 We broke up. 1.00

00:49:23.000 She got too big for her britches. 0.99

00:49:25.000 And one thing that was interesting is, see this guy in the chair?

00:49:28.000 He's like, and I, for a photo caption, this issue, I think it was actually this photo, because he looked like a badass, I said, whatever his name was, would have been a total badass if it wasn't for cerebral palsy.

00:49:41.000 And that pissed off the guy who sort of facilitated this whole thing. 0.98

00:49:45.000 And he goes, he is a fucking badass to us. 0.87

00:49:48.000 And I was like, I think his name was Andrew. 0.98

00:49:49.000 I go, Andrew, you're awesome.

00:49:50.000 These people are great people, but he's not a badass.

00:49:54.000 He can't move.

00:49:56.000 Like, if you took him out of his chair, he'd fall flat on his face.

00:49:59.000 If someone heard he was going to beat them up, they wouldn't be scared.

00:50:03.000 So I'm sorry I didn't call him a badass, but let's be remotely honest.

00:50:09.000 It was fun hanging out with those dudes.

00:50:12.000 No, this is the badass picture.

00:50:13.000 Yeah.

00:50:14.000 Oh.

00:50:19.000 I wonder if this is still available.

00:50:23.000 You can see, too, it's getting more newsy.

00:50:26.000 This is when I started to lose interest.

00:50:30.000 But I'm very proud of this photo shoot.

00:50:32.000 So back in the old days, we had to do fashion to make money.

00:50:36.000 And that was Shane's big thing.

00:50:38.000 He's like, you need to do more fashion.

00:50:39.000 I go, it's boring.

00:50:41.000 Look at these fashion shoots in magazines.

00:50:43.000 And they're so pretentious.

00:50:44.000 They mean nothing.

00:50:45.000 It's a waste of editorial space.

00:50:47.000 And he goes, well, figure it out, dude, because I need fashion to sell ads.

00:50:52.000 And then I figured it out.

00:50:53.000 Let's give it context.

00:50:55.000 Let's come up with a theme and then it'll be art and the clothes will be ancillary.

00:51:01.000 So that's actually how we started do's and don'ts.

00:51:03.000 Because I'd have the do's and it would be our sponsor's clothes.

00:51:07.000 And then I would juxtapose that with don'ts and we'd go to the Salvation Army and buy dumb outfits and make fun of people's clothes.

00:51:12.000 And then we started finding people on the streets and that became the do's and the don'ts.

00:51:16.000 But I also kept this concept of fashion editorials that say something. 0.88

00:51:22.000 So we came up with this dumb concept, goth jocks, which don't exist. 0.54

00:51:27.000 And we dressed up a bunch of models as goths and then put them in gyms and jock clothes. 0.99

00:51:35.000 This is, I think, my favorite photo shoot. 0.99

00:51:37.000 Although we did another one called Eat Shit and a Winter, and it was all fat chicks, but not fat like today. 0.99

00:51:43.000 It was fat like we like them. 1.00

00:51:45.000 Normal plump. 0.98

00:51:47.000 It's Terry Richardson at a nude motel.

00:51:51.000 Eric Lavoisi was sort of like Ryan.

00:51:53.000 We used to pick on him all the time. 0.99

00:51:54.000 In fact, I called him and another intern the faggots for, I think, five years. 1.00

00:51:58.000 He ended up being the head of sales and paying all our rent. 0.97

00:52:01.000 But we did an issue dedicated to him called the Eric Lavois issue, where he was in the, we just wrote articles about him.

00:52:07.000 I took one article about Mona Lisa's smile and I did edit replace Mona Lisa Eric Lavoie and it's all about Eric Lavoie's smile, his mysterious smile, and how it lures people in.

00:52:19.000 I think that was the only issue ever that didn't have 100% pickup.

00:52:23.000 Oh, that's the photo shoot I was telling you about before that lost his 100 grand.

00:52:28.000 Lost his, what was it, Yamaha or something?

00:52:35.000 So this is going back over many years.

00:52:41.000 Yeah, and you can see.

00:52:43.000 Oh, you know who this is?

00:52:44.000 This is Joanna Newsome.

00:52:45.000 That's who Adam Samberg, what's his name?

00:52:48.000 In Hot Rod?

00:52:49.000 Andy Samberg?

00:52:50.000 Andy Samberg.

00:52:51.000 That's who he's boning.

00:52:52.000 What a catch.

00:52:53.000 She always wears high heels.

00:52:58.000 All right.

00:52:59.000 I remember this.

00:53:00.000 Look at this.

00:53:02.000 A pregnant cow dies.

00:53:03.000 It starts decomposing, and the calf is shot out like a cannon as the body decomposes.

00:53:11.000 Oh, this one was very disturbing.

00:53:14.000 If you think your girlfriend's feet are gross, remember there's always this. 0.82

00:53:19.000 I'll show you with the Zoom.

00:53:25.000 Pretty, pretty bad.

00:53:26.000 I don't think...

00:53:27.000 Could you get over that?

00:53:28.000 She's an attractive lady, right? 1.00

00:53:30.000 Sure, sure.

00:53:31.000 Okay, you're pretty. 1.00

00:53:32.000 Oh, nice tits. 1.00

00:53:32.000 Okay, let's hang out. 1.00

00:53:33.000 Oh, you want to go to bed?

00:53:34.000 Yeah.

00:53:34.000 Okay, take your shoes off.

00:53:35.000 No, I should probably not.

00:53:37.000 Take them off.

00:53:37.000 Come on, let's relax.

00:53:39.000 Oh, my fucking God. 1.00

00:53:41.000 Oh, wow. 1.00

00:53:41.000 Okay. 1.00

00:53:42.000 Oh, boy.

00:53:43.000 Maybe put your shoes back on.

00:53:45.000 Your boots, I guess.

00:53:46.000 She can't wear shoes. 0.71

00:53:49.000 I feel like this is a better time for photography.

00:53:52.000 By the way, Terry Richardson invented the whole, or I should say he punkified and popularized the whole point and shoot thing.

00:53:59.000 He used to secretly call Ryan McGinley Ryan McCoppy.

00:54:04.000 There's some crusties in the hospital.

00:54:06.000 This is back when crusty Antifa punks were on the outskirts of society.

00:54:11.000 Now they're mainstream.

00:54:16.000 Okay, I think we're done that, right?

00:54:17.000 Maybe I shouldn't have done the photo issue so soon.

00:54:20.000 Because I'm not sure what to do with this.

00:54:30.000 That's a dead woman. 1.00

00:54:31.000 Check that out.

00:54:36.000 Oh, sheesh.

00:54:38.000 This picture was taken on Avenida Chaputelepec and Cale de Monterre in Colonia, Roma.

00:54:44.000 She was a very famous journalist who wrote some really good books.

00:54:46.000 That day, she had a book release party and was on her way there.

00:54:49.000 She was all made up and going to pick up her sister to go to the event.

00:54:51.000 Crossing the street, two cars crashed and then ran her over.

00:54:54.000 This picture is great because she has all her makeup on and she doesn't look dead, even though she is.

00:54:59.000 I never seen...

00:55:01.000 I barely, yeah, I have a faint memory of that.

00:55:04.000 Oh, that was my buddy Gavin Newsom.

00:55:06.000 Guess where all these guys are?

00:55:08.000 Dead. 0.97

00:55:09.000 See, back in the 80s, if you had a facial tattoo, you were considered mentally ill, unemployable.

00:55:17.000 I think it's called, there's an acronym for it, like ABSCAR, antisocial, something.

00:55:23.000 And so these skinheads would get facial tattoos so they could get welfare for the rest of their lives.

00:55:27.000 And they all ended up dead.

00:55:29.000 There's another Gavin Newsom?

00:55:31.000 Oh, sorry, Gavin.

00:55:33.000 Oh, that's Derek Ridgers.

00:55:36.000 But Gavin, what's his name?

00:55:37.000 Gavin Watson knew all these guys.

00:55:44.000 All right.

00:55:46.000 How are we doing for time?

00:55:48.000 We're at 55 minutes.

00:55:50.000 Okay, we're going to have to just speed through these, folks.

00:55:52.000 So that was the early years.

00:55:55.000 Now we're at 1996.

00:55:57.000 So this is when now we're feeling good.

00:55:59.000 We're free and we're doing things by ourselves.

00:56:02.000 You rented a big loft in Montreal and we all live at the office.

00:56:07.000 So it's just one big open room.

00:56:10.000 Shane and I built two rooms for ourselves. 0.98

00:56:12.000 I said I didn't want to live with Sarouche because he's sober and sober people make me nervous when I'm fucking getting wasted every day. 0.75

00:56:19.000 And now we could really be ourselves.

00:56:24.000 And we started making money too, even though we're paying off debts.

00:56:28.000 And now I'm designing the magazine.

00:56:31.000 I'm figuring out how we go.

00:56:33.000 And we could really, like, we're not, you could tell before we were pandering and we're doing, hey, art and Poland.

00:56:39.000 And that's my girlfriend Susan dressed up as a Latin king, by the way. 1.00

00:56:44.000 And now we have, we're not beholden to anyone.

00:56:46.000 And we can do a whole page on Jesus Lizard.

00:56:48.000 And we can do a whole page on the gurus of lo-fi.

00:56:53.000 And the comics can be super weird.

00:56:54.000 Istoire mouette by Stéphane Blanquet.

00:56:58.000 Look at this. 0.99

00:56:59.000 This guy is so fucking talented. 0.96

00:57:01.000 This is why, when I say I'm a cartoonist, people don't get how it was in Montreal. 0.99

00:57:06.000 It was like a real art form.

00:57:07.000 This guy chops off his hand, he nails it to a board, and then he grabs the board and uses it to scratch his back.

00:57:16.000 Each one of these could be an awesome painting.

00:57:18.000 Mark Bell, another really talented cartoonist.

00:57:21.000 This was going to be my job.

00:57:23.000 Oh, look, here's a thing I did about Vice.

00:57:26.000 What does it say?

00:57:26.000 Hey, the new Vice is out.

00:57:28.000 Wow, what a great comic page.

00:57:30.000 And then I pause for a sec.

00:57:32.000 I don't get any of these.

00:57:36.000 Classic Gav. 0.87

00:57:38.000 That's another alias I had, Gabbo, Daddy's Little Slut. 1.00

00:57:44.000 That was a woman, Debbie Dreschler, who did a whole graphic novel about how her father raped her and got into intimate detail. 0.98

00:57:53.000 There's a sex pistols reunion, Basquiat. 0.57

00:57:57.000 You're starting to see the brand now, the stuff we're in.

00:58:00.000 It's punk, rock, skateboarding, hip-hop.

00:58:06.000 Oh, this is when we were so broke we would just use ourselves as models.

00:58:10.000 So this was an article about smuggling Pakistanis.

00:58:13.000 So it's me carrying Sharoosh from the water. 0.92

00:58:21.000 Look at that.

00:58:22.000 Michelle Yal on the cover.

00:58:24.000 We discovered her.

00:58:25.000 What year was this?

00:58:27.000 This would be 1997.

00:58:31.000 Now she's, you know, that's 10 years before Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon. 0.99

00:58:36.000 Kung Fu.

00:58:38.000 Tricky was big, trip hop.

00:58:44.000 And we'd make these horrible mistakes, like with the Tricky interview, it came out, and thanks to Quark Express, the picture was hiding a column.

00:58:56.000 Oh, okay, not in this one. 0.82

00:58:59.000 That was so fucking stressful, man. 0.61

00:59:02.000 Yeah, were there any huge mistakes like that that were just too late to fix? 0.97

00:59:06.000 Oh, yeah, plenty. 0.99

00:59:06.000 Spelling Farrakhan wrong and all kinds of shit. 0.99

00:59:10.000 And one time we did the do's and don'ts. 0.99

00:59:11.000 This is even in New York days.

00:59:13.000 And it said do's, do's, do's, do.

00:59:17.000 They were all do's.

00:59:18.000 Oh, no.

00:59:18.000 And I would get this like heat that went up my back when that happened, and I would get dizzy.

00:59:22.000 Like we had these refurbished computers, and this is the lowest point of my life. 0.93

00:59:28.000 I mean, obviously, like when my son had to have an operation after when he was a baby, there was bigger shit than that. 0.68

00:59:33.000 But as far as like sheer crippling panic that I didn't think I could handle.

00:59:37.000 So the issue's due tomorrow.

00:59:39.000 And we bought these refurbished computers from, I think it was Shane's dad.

00:59:44.000 And refurbished computers are haunted.

00:59:48.000 They have ghosts in them.

00:59:49.000 Don't buy them.

00:59:51.000 So I noticed the software just kept getting buggier and buggier.

00:59:55.000 And at one point, my files, and these issues would take me like 25 hours to lay out in a row.

01:00:02.000 Because everyone's last minute, right?

01:00:04.000 It's not like you can start laying out the issue on day one.

01:00:07.000 So I'd work 24 hours straight right up to the deadline.

01:00:10.000 And I noticed it keeps crashing. 0.99

01:00:13.000 What the fuck? 0.98

01:00:14.000 So then there's a thing you can do. 0.99

01:00:16.000 It's like command I on a file.

01:00:18.000 Back then it was Apple I. Pum I. And it would show you the size of it.

01:00:24.000 It's 13 megabytes.

01:00:26.000 This would be, back then this would be like 50 megabytes.

01:00:29.000 It wasn't big.

01:00:30.000 It was black in my photos. 1.00

01:00:31.000 And then I'd go, what the fuck? 0.98

01:00:32.000 And then I'd open it again. 0.99

01:00:33.000 It would say 14 megabytes.

01:00:36.000 It was eating itself.

01:00:38.000 And my work was in there.

01:00:39.000 And we can't miss the deadline.

01:00:41.000 So I'm like, I take off my shirt. 0.98

01:00:44.000 I lie down on the wood like, what the fuck's happening here? 0.97

01:00:49.000 And what I would do is I would have a blank quark doc. 0.97

01:00:53.000 I hope this isn't boring.

01:00:55.000 The dying file.

01:00:56.000 I'd open it, select all, paste, and then it would crash.

01:00:59.000 So I'd be open slack paste!

01:01:00.000 Open slack paste!

01:01:01.000 Open slack paste!

01:01:03.000 All night. 1.00

01:01:04.000 Damn. 1.00

01:01:04.000 I got most of it back. 1.00

01:01:06.000 And this happened all the time back then.

01:01:08.000 Like if it took you 10 hours to lay out a page, then after it crashed, it would take you three hours to rebuild.

01:01:17.000 And the good news about that time, though, after I fixed it all and I was lying there, look at this.

01:01:22.000 I interviewed a piece of pasta.

01:01:26.000 How long have you been a piece of pasta?

01:01:28.000 I know I'm pronouncing that in a Canadian way.

01:01:31.000 That's annoying.

01:01:32.000 I was originally formed at a plant here in Rexdale that makes and distributes various shapes of pasta for an Italian company called Santa Maria, who in turn sells it to Mastro and some other people.

01:01:41.000 I'm going to be bagged this week and probably will be in stores before the spring.

01:01:46.000 I had a bowl of pasta the other night and I dropped one of the cooked pieces on my way to the table.

01:01:50.000 How does that make pasta feel?

01:01:52.000 That's about as bad as it gets.

01:01:53.000 Being eaten and enjoyed is the prime objective and when something stands in the way of that, that being a normal pasta meal that gets eaten by a healthy human enjoys its food, we feel we failed.

01:02:02.000 I interviewed a potato.

01:02:03.000 I interviewed the devil.

01:02:05.000 I interviewed God.

01:02:09.000 Lots of affirmative action, too.

01:02:11.000 Wow, look, I'm getting good at drawing here.

01:02:15.000 You know, you're getting old when you lose touch with what's cool and your friends become square.

01:02:22.000 Are there ever not enough girls in the pit, eh? 1.00

01:02:24.000 What's a pit?

01:02:26.000 And then your tolerance level plummets and you wear bad shoes.

01:02:28.000 Hey, dude, this party rocks. 1.00

01:02:30.000 Unhand me, you retard! 1.00

01:02:32.000 Comfortable shoes. 1.00

01:02:34.000 Fun stuff.

01:02:36.000 So it continues like that, right up until...

01:02:39.000 Oh, that was a fun cover.

01:02:41.000 I just stole that image.

01:02:44.000 This is when I was really learning Adobe Illustrator.

01:02:46.000 It continued like this, stealing covers and stuff into New York days.

01:02:51.000 I don't think there's anything particularly interesting.

01:02:53.000 You know, one of the keys to any show and movie, anything you do, is you want to wow them in the third act.

01:03:02.000 And with that, that was 96, 97.

01:03:05.000 So we're about to go to New York.

01:03:08.000 You know what?

01:03:08.000 Let's just focus on the last issue I really cared about.

01:03:13.000 Volume 13.

01:03:21.000 Volume 13, number 6.

01:03:26.000 And then I have a way to make this fun.

01:03:31.000 Ready?

01:03:34.000 Volume 13, number 6.

01:03:36.000 Here it is.

01:03:41.000 We love cops.

01:03:49.000 Look at the quality of ads now.

01:03:51.000 This was, I guess, 97, 96?

01:03:56.000 We got a lot of ads to get through before it begins.

01:04:01.000 Here was this me.

01:04:02.000 2006.

01:04:04.000 This is me saying goodbye.

01:04:08.000 Cops there. 1.00

01:04:11.000 Fucking cops. 1.00

01:04:13.000 You can't get cops to talk. 1.00

01:04:14.000 The key is you get them when they're still interested in the job within the first year of retirement.

01:04:20.000 They still have their badge. 0.99

01:04:22.000 They're still excited about stories and shit. 0.99

01:04:27.000 I am a cop. 0.99

01:04:29.000 Oh, this is what I was talking about.

01:04:32.000 So we broke down his entire uniform and everything about it, the eight-point hat, the hat device, grooming, turtleneck, collarbrass, patches, pockets, shirts.

01:04:44.000 See, this is how you make pop culture.

01:04:47.000 You care about it.

01:04:49.000 You're involved in it.

01:04:51.000 That's why I was so good advice because I really wanted to know and I wanted to impart wisdom.

01:04:58.000 And it wasn't like, I didn't, I wasn't checking in and out of a job.

01:05:01.000 I was like part of the culture and helping other people find out about what's going on.

01:05:06.000 Like one issue we never got to do was I wanted to take a picture of a building that was like, say, six stories high and then have people in their windows and then go interview everyone in the window.

01:05:18.000 So the table of contents would be that picture and it would just be like apartment 2A, apartment 2B, apartment 2C, and break down the whole, the whole, you know, you couldn't do too many buildings, but like, you know, say a 15-apartment building.

01:05:33.000 And that's, you'd be surprised how much of these pop culture people in your life are fans, are nerds.

01:05:40.000 For example, I've talked about this before, but Chuck D used to be a show promoter, and then he started Public Enemy.

01:05:47.000 Ludacris was a radio DJ, and then he went on his own.

01:05:52.000 Fugging Morrissey, he wanted to write for Emmy, and then he ended up becoming his own pop star.

01:06:02.000 He was going to shows.

01:06:03.000 Iggy Pop was obsessed with the Ann Arbor scene and the Detroit scene, and he handpicked all these different guys from his favorite band and said, let's start a supergroup.

01:06:12.000 The Stooges is actually a super group created by a fan.

01:06:16.000 The Gun Club.

01:06:17.000 That guy was the head of the Blondie fan club.

01:06:23.000 Rookie time, the first five years.

01:06:25.000 Oh, yeah, we broke it down with this.

01:06:27.000 See this chart here?

01:06:30.000 See this chart?

01:06:33.000 It's upside down.

01:06:35.000 And as the magazine goes on, the different guy is highlighted.

01:06:39.000 So you can see where you are in your cop career with these icons.

01:06:44.000 Bring on the burnout, five years through.

01:06:47.000 Now here we are.

01:06:47.000 Mid-career stories.

01:06:51.000 I'd love to just reprint this issue and give it to a bunch of cops. 0.92

01:06:55.000 And then retirees stories.

01:06:58.000 I wonder if I could find the PDF.

01:07:00.000 This was the do's and don'ts.

01:07:02.000 You see, like, it's funny that the New York Times did this expose on how vice has always been sexist.

01:07:07.000 These are who we considered cool chicks back then. 1.00

01:07:11.000 You know? 1.00

01:07:12.000 Like, she's hot in her silly little fucking long underwear. 1.00

01:07:16.000 This Deadbeat Dad look or this everything about Elad dude. 1.00

01:07:20.000 Or this guy in the tracksuit. 1.00

01:07:22.000 Like, is she a dumb slut with huge tits? 1.00

01:07:27.000 This guy was our cool guy. 1.00

01:07:29.000 Oh, no, these are don'ts. 0.99

01:07:31.000 Sorry.

01:07:32.000 These girls are don'ts. 1.00

01:07:33.000 This fat kid. 0.96

01:07:35.000 This is what I said when I'm, just when you thought nobody gets laid less than you, Mr. Nanopenis waddles past reading a comic book about chefs that compete in outer space. 1.00

01:07:43.000 This kid is growing to grow up with so little sex, his penis is eventually going to become asshole-shaped. 1.00

01:07:48.000 That's mean. 1.00

01:07:51.000 See, look at our do's. 0.98

01:07:53.000 Some retro broads, some old guy, some feminist lesbian, some people wrestling, some Jew broad. 0.94

01:08:06.000 These are our don'ts. 0.95

01:08:07.000 Okay, we're done.

01:08:09.000 We're out of time.

01:08:10.000 No letters.

01:08:12.000 No get fired.

01:08:14.000 But I am going to play a game with you, Ryan.

01:08:16.000 Yeah.

01:08:17.000 Before we go.

01:08:17.000 Look at that.

01:08:18.000 Pro guns.

01:08:19.000 Oh, this is what I was talking about before.

01:08:22.000 I mentioned this at the beginning.

01:08:24.000 Oh, I think I mentioned this in another show, though.

01:08:26.000 It's like, Jesse, if you're doing something in police brutality, you don't have a picture of the woman behind the defense on the stairs. 0.99

01:08:33.000 I want to see someone getting their face smashed in with a fucking billy club. 0.99

01:08:38.000 I want sensationalism. 1.00

01:08:44.000 All right.

01:08:44.000 Okay, here's the game we're going to do, right?

01:08:50.000 I'm going to ask you a question.

01:08:53.000 This is from the movie Gold Career Girls by Mike Lee.

01:08:57.000 I'm going to ask you a question.

01:08:58.000 We've got too much to go through here, and I think you get the idea.

01:09:01.000 The photo issue really gave you a good idea of what different things we did.

01:09:06.000 And we're going to let the volumes choose the answer.

01:09:11.000 Oh, cool.

01:09:13.000 Okay.

01:09:14.000 So your career is in question.

01:09:18.000 Sure, sure.

01:09:19.000 I've fired you about six times. 0.98

01:09:21.000 It's also possible, by the way, that when you leave me, you'll be a pariah because you'll be the guy who worked for that white supremacist. 0.98

01:09:29.000 I'm not leaving. 0.91

01:09:30.000 So this whole resume you're building might be all for naught, right?

01:09:36.000 So let's see where your career is headed.

01:09:38.000 Maybe you'll work for me for the next 40 years.

01:09:41.000 Who knows?

01:09:42.000 I like the sound of that.

01:09:44.000 It's a country song.

01:09:49.000 Okay?

01:09:50.000 Yes.

01:09:51.000 So shall we do your career first?

01:09:53.000 Sure, and then we'll...

01:09:55.000 The volumes will answer.

01:09:57.000 So, dear volumes, what is the future of the president of the fag zone's career? 0.91

01:10:07.000 Ready?

01:10:08.000 I'm going to count to 10.

01:10:09.000 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10.

01:10:18.000 Okay, this book holds the answer.

01:10:21.000 Now, whether this is an ad or editorial, we will know what your business future is.

01:10:27.000 Are you ready?

01:10:28.000 I'm ready.

01:10:30.000 Okay, I'm just going to rub some pages and you say stop.

01:10:35.000 Stop.

01:10:40.000 Hmm.

01:10:41.000 What is that?

01:10:42.000 Not great.

01:10:43.000 What is that?

01:10:44.000 Me laying down?

01:10:45.000 On the beach?

01:10:46.000 So this is an ad for we activist Gino Ianucci doing the crayfish at the crayfish party.

01:10:55.000 Oh, I thought he was getting arrested.

01:10:56.000 Yeah, me too.

01:10:57.000 On the beach.

01:10:58.000 And the crayfish party is a ritual held every August meant to compensate the Swedish people for once again being abandoned by summer.

01:11:05.000 Abandoned.

01:11:06.000 In the name of a backward walking creature, exquisitely tasting of salt.

01:11:10.000 The Swedes let each other behave in ways not accepted otherwise. 0.97

01:11:13.000 Dressing silly, singing out loud. 0.97

01:11:15.000 This is great news. 0.99

01:11:16.000 I thought he was getting arrested.

01:11:17.000 That's pretty cool. 0.91

01:11:20.000 Dressing silly, singing out loud, and making out with inappropriate persons is all very well this night.

01:11:25.000 The natives' thirst for summer sun is successfully quenched with schnapps. 0.99

01:11:30.000 I'm all saluting the next drink with a ridiculous song. 0.98

01:11:32.000 The Swedes shine a greasy smile. 1.00

01:11:34.000 Looking forward to six months or more of liquid light therapy.

01:11:38.000 I like it.

01:11:39.000 So I'm drinking a lot of alcohol, but I'm dancing, making out with people.

01:11:43.000 Yep. 1.00

01:11:43.000 And wearing stupid clothes, which is our mirror. 1.00

01:11:46.000 partying, sort of like what you did at the boat thing. 1.00

01:11:48.000 Cool.

01:11:48.000 It looks like you're going to be doing stuff like that for a while.

01:11:51.000 However, you have Mars Rising.

01:11:54.000 You know how just like when they do your astrology readings, they talk about like some other thing that's rising?

01:11:59.000 Of course.

01:12:00.000 On the previous page, we have, it appears to be some ex-cons.

01:12:05.000 Oh.

01:12:06.000 Free music, jamming out in jail.

01:12:08.000 So I remember this story vividly.

01:12:10.000 And it's about bands in prison.

01:12:14.000 Really? 0.94

01:12:14.000 So I guess what the magic volumes are saying about your career is stay the fuck out of trouble. 0.94

01:12:20.000 Don't get arrested again. 0.97

01:12:21.000 And you've been arrested quite a few times since I met you.

01:12:24.000 Two.

01:12:25.000 Well, three.

01:12:26.000 Wait, wait.

01:12:27.000 It's a lot.

01:12:27.000 Is it four?

01:12:28.000 No, it's three.

01:12:29.000 Okay, so that's a fair amount.

01:12:31.000 And we've had the police over here, was it yesterday?

01:12:35.000 Two days ago.

01:12:36.000 So it's saying, keep your nose clean, don't get arrested, and you will have a lucrative, fun career.

01:12:44.000 Oh, wait, by the time this releases, it was like a week ago.

01:12:47.000 Okay.

01:12:48.000 You'll have a lucrative, fun career that involves having a great time.

01:12:54.000 So just like the boat party episode, that movie you made.

01:12:59.000 It's pretty badass.

01:13:00.000 Is there another one?

01:13:01.000 Look at this picture.

01:13:04.000 Gov Charney would print ads. 0.99

01:13:06.000 He's having sex with her in these photographs. 0.99

01:13:08.000 What? 0.84

01:13:08.000 See, things were so much like the drugs issue. 0.84

01:13:11.000 You couldn't do any of this anymore.

01:13:13.000 I single-handedly beat back political correctness from 2000, from 1995 till around 2005.

01:13:22.000 I held the beast at bay.

01:13:24.000 And then I, and I got shoved aside and it went just like a dam breaking.

01:13:31.000 All right. 0.99

01:13:32.000 There's probably vice magazines in my apartment while I was growing up because my stepdad was into cool shit. 0.99

01:13:40.000 Sex pistols, punk. 0.98

01:13:43.000 He had a lot of magazines, a lot of his hair. 0.58

01:13:47.000 But I meant to ask you the drug thing.

01:13:49.000 What were the different drugs that people did when you took the pictures of them?

01:13:53.000 There's ketamine.

01:13:55.000 Oh, yeah.

01:13:55.000 There's everything.

01:13:57.000 Acid, ketamine, heroin, pot, mushrooms. 1.00

01:14:01.000 Damn. 1.00

01:14:02.000 Qualudes, amphetamines, uppers, downers, everything. 1.00

01:14:07.000 Damn. 1.00

01:14:08.000 We did that a lot. 0.99

01:14:08.000 We got people draw on different drugs and stuff. 0.99

01:14:13.000 Write articles wasted, which is really hard.

01:14:17.000 Try writing an article stoned.

01:14:18.000 I did it, I think, at Tacky Mag once.

01:14:20.000 And I forgot what I was typing like 500 times.

01:14:25.000 Okay, the show's over, but we have to do one last thing before we go.

01:14:29.000 And that is Ryan's love life.

01:14:33.000 What?

01:14:33.000 So exact same rigmarole.

01:14:35.000 Oh, okay.

01:14:36.000 All right, ready?

01:14:37.000 Yes.

01:14:38.000 We're going to ask the volumes of vice what Ryan's love life, sex not really.

01:14:44.000 Like, will he get married?

01:14:45.000 What's going to happen here?

01:14:46.000 Will he be single forever?

01:14:48.000 Let's see. 1.00

01:14:49.000 What are you doing with your fucking hair, you faggot? 1.00

01:14:51.000 This is like a brain thing. 1.00

01:14:55.000 All right.

01:14:55.000 I'm going to count to 13.

01:14:57.000 Okay.

01:14:58.000 One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten, eleven, twelve, thirteen.

01:15:12.000 2005.

01:15:15.000 Coming to the end of my time there, but still having a gay old time. 1.00

01:15:19.000 Proud of all of these.

01:15:22.000 Proud of your these.

01:15:23.000 Proud of everything up to the cops, including the cops.

01:15:26.000 All right, so now you're going to say stop.

01:15:31.000 Stop.

01:15:32.000 Right in the middle.

01:15:33.000 Are you ready, Ryan?

01:15:34.000 I'm ready.

01:15:35.000 This is the only time we're ever going to be covering vice.

01:15:39.000 This is the be-all and end-all of our vice coverage.

01:15:43.000 I hope I gave you a good, big picture of it.

01:15:46.000 I hope you're inspired by vice in that you realize you can start your own business.

01:15:50.000 You've got to keep plowing forward.

01:15:52.000 Never accept no for an answer.

01:15:54.000 Oh, I'm glad I remembered to mention this.

01:15:55.000 Remember I told you about the file that was eating itself and I was so stressed out and I was lying on the floor with my shirt off and I managed to save the day.

01:16:01.000 I remember thinking, you know what?

01:16:03.000 Good.

01:16:04.000 Because I just crossed an obstacle.

01:16:07.000 And imagine there's like 10 of you in some sort of like tough mudder course. 0.98

01:16:12.000 And that's what entrepreneurialship is.

01:16:14.000 And then when you crawl like through the mud, the barbed wire ahead of you and then you go over this big wall.

01:16:19.000 Behind you, there's a bunch of people who couldn't make it over the wall.

01:16:23.000 So there's other people because you're all going to run into these problems, these obstacles.

01:16:28.000 Every one of you.

01:16:29.000 Nothing is smooth, especially the first two years of running a business. 0.99

01:16:33.000 You're going to go through this shit, but there's two types of entrepreneurs. 0.97

01:16:37.000 And I would argue the first one isn't really an entrepreneur who goes, oh, well, the files are eating themselves. 0.99

01:16:42.000 So we can't do this.

01:16:43.000 We'll have to fix the computers and then we'll miss the deadline.

01:16:47.000 So I guess call me back when you fix the...

01:16:50.000 No, that's one kind.

01:16:52.000 And that guy's behind the wall.

01:16:54.000 The other kind is the guy who goes, okay, we'll open the files and paste them. 0.97

01:16:57.000 And then after we get this issue printed and sent to the printer, then we can start working on this horrible piece of shit refurbished computer that's cursed. 0.94

01:17:06.000 And so I now had less competition. 0.97

01:17:09.000 All right.

01:17:12.000 This is the end of the show.

01:17:14.000 This is Ryan's Love Life.

01:17:17.000 Are you ready?

01:17:18.000 I'm ready. 0.82

01:17:23.000 What if it's gays? 1.00

01:17:25.000 I don't care. 0.99

01:17:26.000 And you're going to be.

01:17:28.000 I will start my journey today.

01:17:30.000 I will find myself a nice man. 1.00

01:17:32.000 What if it's an article about a guy who cut his dick off? 1.00

01:17:35.000 Oh. 1.00

01:17:36.000 What if it's an article about a celibate priest?

01:17:39.000 That's not bad. 0.99

01:17:40.000 What if it's a burn victim who's never had a date in his life and doesn't know what tits feel like? 1.00

01:17:45.000 Well, it'd be too late for that one. 0.99

01:17:48.000 Ready?

01:17:48.000 Yep.

01:17:49.000 Ryan's love life starting now.

01:17:53.000 Oh, that looks...

01:17:54.000 I don't...

01:17:55.000 I can't tell what that is.

01:17:56.000 Oh.

01:17:58.000 You're going to have an ethnic girlfriend. 0.96

01:18:00.000 That is bizarrely on topic.

01:18:03.000 Yeah.

01:18:04.000 Wow.

01:18:05.000 So you're Asian, so I guess he looks slightly Hispanic.

01:18:09.000 So I'll be with a Hispanic. 1.00

01:18:10.000 So wait, that's me.

01:18:11.000 I'm Hispanic and Asian.

01:18:13.000 Oh, my God.

01:18:13.000 What that is.

01:18:14.000 Does that mean you're going to love yourself?

01:18:16.000 You'll only love yourself? 1.00

01:18:18.000 Oh, shit. 1.00

01:18:19.000 It might mean that you'll only ever love yourself. 1.00

01:18:22.000 It might mean that you're going to be in a relationship.

01:18:26.000 Geez, my nails are pretty dirty.

01:18:29.000 But I think in both scenarios, you're content.

01:18:32.000 Oh, that's good.

01:18:33.000 Yeah.

01:18:34.000 So you're either just going to love yourself.

01:18:36.000 Like, these people are smiling.

01:18:37.000 Yeah, they're having a good time.

01:18:38.000 Yeah, yeah.

01:18:38.000 So whether this is all about your own megalomania, which I think is sad, but apparently you don't, or you're going to be the Hispanic, you're going to be the Asian, and they're both going to be mixed because it says melting pot.

01:18:52.000 Right.

01:18:52.000 So your girl is going to be ethnically ambiguous.

01:18:56.000 You're more on the Asian side, I find.

01:18:59.000 So she's going to be more on the Hispanic side. 1.00

01:19:02.000 Wow.

01:19:03.000 What a definitive answer for this game.

01:19:05.000 Well, that's another thing.

01:19:05.000 That's bizarre.

01:19:06.000 The fact that this is so definitive means that they're positive.

01:19:09.000 Uh-huh.

01:19:10.000 I gotcha. 0.99

01:19:11.000 They're not fucking around. 0.99

01:19:13.000 Right, folks. 0.99

01:19:14.000 That's it.

01:19:14.000 So nobody gets to play that game again.

01:19:16.000 Like, people are going to have questions about this episode.

01:19:18.000 No more revisiting?

01:19:19.000 I'll consider it.

01:19:21.000 That would be cool.

01:19:22.000 But then that's like...

01:19:23.000 Because you're going to be thinking of stuff to be like, oh, yeah.

01:19:24.000 Then I'm like, that's like Jell-O Biafra having a Dead Kennedys game he plays every show.

01:19:31.000 And I moved on.

01:19:32.000 One thing I was really worried about after I left was, is this the end?

01:19:35.000 Am I going to be the Vice guy forever?

01:19:37.000 I wanted to be like Johnny Rotten, who had the Sex Pistols, but then he had Pill.

01:19:41.000 And no one thinks of Johnny Rotten as just the Sex Pistols guy.

01:19:44.000 He's thought of his legacy as the Sex Pistols and Pill and his books and other stuff.

01:19:49.000 Now I'm not, a lot of people don't even know I'm at Vice or I was at Vice or I created hipsters or I'd created Williamsburg.

01:19:57.000 And I did.

01:19:59.000 Get fired, get in trouble, be brave, and never stop fighting. 0.99

01:20:28.000 I mean, I'm fucking. 1.00

Get Off My Lawn - Gavin McInnes - August 27, 2020

S03E04 - VICE [2020-08-27 - S03E04 - VICE]

Episode Stats

Summary

Transcript