Impaulsive with Logan Paul - DWARF MAMBA RETURNS! Life After Leaving Logan Paul, Working A 9-5 Job, Hawk Tuah Crypto Scandal

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00:00:18.440 WHOOP shows you what helps your performance

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00:01:00.940 Lisa, tell them about our new show.

00:01:03.560 We have a new podcast.

00:01:04.960 It's called Don't Lie to Me.

00:01:06.300 I'm Lexi Iwanu.

00:01:07.500 We're two best friends, 22 years apart, but so close at heart.

00:01:11.440 And I'm Lisa DiGiulio, the old one,

00:01:13.640 which means we have wildly different references,

00:01:16.080 occasionally different opinions.

00:01:17.500 And at this point in my 50s, I've lived it all.

00:01:20.340 Now in my 30s, being the founder of New Shoes,

00:01:22.980 Good taste is my business.

00:01:25.400 Listen on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

00:01:52.980 He winks on Halloween.

00:01:54.980 He gets right up next to the microphone.

00:01:56.760 I hear you can almost hear the eyelashes hit each other.

00:01:59.820 You've never seen Italy so quiet as when the Pope gets up to wink on Halloween.

00:02:05.140 Listen to Artists on Artists on Artists on Artists every Thursday on the iHeartRadio app,

00:02:09.640 Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

00:02:12.660 Evan Eckenrode is back.

00:02:14.580 The mom.

00:02:15.460 I'll be vulnerable.

00:02:16.140 I'll be real right now.

00:02:16.960 I'm at a reset.

00:02:17.800 I have a job now.

00:02:18.540 Nine to five.

00:02:19.280 Oh, my God.

00:02:20.260 If they're real aliens, welcome to our world.

00:02:22.320 Look how beautiful it is.

00:02:23.640 Look how we treat our CEOs that we have disagreements with.

00:02:27.320 People come in my go like, you fell off.

00:02:29.900 That doesn't hurt me because I never thought I was at a place to fall off.

00:02:34.500 You do this thing, you'll talk a lot, but then you don't listen.

00:02:37.380 Yeah, because nobody else has anything good to say.

00:02:39.580 You would have had a hard time at that Thanksgiving. 0.58

00:02:42.100 It was the first time we really got together and I realized how f***ed up we are.

00:02:47.260 I was going to ask at what point. 0.88

00:02:48.760 Are you legally a dwarf? 0.93

00:02:50.000 Yes, because.

00:02:50.600 It's not a legal thing.

00:02:51.700 I'm not going to go to jail for door fraud. 0.92

00:02:54.700 Because Hattu is out now. 0.99

00:02:56.700 Anywho, Hattu in the bed. 0.70

00:02:58.720 She just never woke up.

00:03:00.160 Never woke up.

00:03:09.460 You know who that is?

00:03:11.760 Bro.

00:03:13.060 Who is sitting across from us right now?

00:03:14.620 Oh, it's EX.

00:03:16.020 The legend.

00:03:16.940 Legend.

00:03:17.480 In the flesh.

00:03:18.580 Ladies and gentlemen.

00:03:19.340 I got an intro.

00:03:19.980 Evan Eckenrode, a.k.a. Dwarf Mamba, is back.

00:03:23.860 D-Moms. 1.00

00:03:25.520 Moms. 0.99

00:03:26.400 Yes.

00:03:26.660 Wow, brother.

00:03:27.620 Let's go.

00:03:28.180 Oh, my gosh.

00:03:29.100 One of my best friends.

00:03:30.380 One of my longest friends.

00:03:32.160 Ditto.

00:03:33.720 What do you mean by longest friends?

00:03:34.780 I wish I would have said that differently.

00:03:36.920 One of your longest friends?

00:03:38.760 I'm so sorry.

00:03:39.700 I mean, like, we've been friends for the longest amount of time.

00:03:41.820 I didn't really think of it, but thank you for saying that.

00:03:43.780 As soon as I said it, I went, let's specify.

00:03:47.500 i thought you might have meant length but now i know from the beginning of the episode that you

00:03:52.860 didn't that you don't know how long he is no no no i know evan got a rod for sure i know he got a rod

00:03:58.280 evan eckenrod

00:03:59.780 yo do you guys know that how they say that the earth is run by straight white men 0.99

00:04:08.120 okay well what i've realized maybe the earth is but the skies the skies are run by the gays 0.97

00:04:17.500 every time i get on a plane the flight attendant is a nice gay man and guess what 0.96

00:04:23.660 they don't like me very much i get the worst service bro i swear to god last night dude 0.70

00:04:32.200 the lady ahead of me they had already brought her dessert out and they were clapping

00:04:36.500 singing happy birthday to her and i never even got my dinner whoa because i think because i'm like a 0.92

00:04:42.620 i'm like a bro looking fucking beard so i've been thinking myself lately i'm like how do i change 0.99

00:04:48.060 this dynamic i'll tell you how you be extra kind because you're probably an asshole no i'm not i'm 0.99

00:04:53.340 not an asshole at what point have you ever known me to not be to be an asshole or to not be like 0.99

00:04:59.400 overly nice to people the issue is what i'm what do you mean bro what do you mean dude i was just 0.99

00:05:05.400 telling evan this yesterday you can attest you do this thing that might not like be overtly 0.96

00:05:11.100 asshole-ish, but you do this thing 0.94

00:05:12.920 where you'll talk a lot, and I love 0.98

00:05:15.180 listening to you talk. You'll talk at

00:05:17.080 people, right? And most of them are listening, because you're

00:05:19.040 very happy. No, I'm not done. He's doing it.

00:05:20.940 Yeah, you do it.

00:05:21.380 You do it right now.

00:05:25.000 You'll talk at people, and everyone's so captivated

00:05:27.220 and you're magnetic with your words. You're charismatic.

00:05:29.400 You're Mike. Big Mike.

00:05:31.040 But then you don't listen. You'll talk at people,

00:05:33.480 and then when someone else is turning to talk,

00:05:35.080 you go on your phone. Yeah, because nobody else has anything

00:05:37.180 good to say. It's just all

00:05:38.940 bullshit, bro. I gotta 1.00

00:05:40.820 You talk to a flight attendant and say something funny.

00:05:43.640 He doesn't want to talk to you back and just go.

00:05:46.100 Yeah, yeah, yeah. 1.00

00:05:46.880 And then they're like, all right, fuck this guy. 1.00

00:05:48.480 He's not conversing with me. 1.00

00:05:49.700 He's talking at me.

00:05:50.640 Yeah.

00:05:50.920 I'm here for his pleasure.

00:05:52.560 What I've figured out about it is I need to compliment them.

00:05:58.660 That is the route to success.

00:06:01.340 So on the next, either that or someone told me that I could pretend to potentially be gay for the flight. 0.99

00:06:09.740 but i don't think i can pull that off have you not fucking learned from this exact part no you 0.98

00:06:15.660 can't do male only march i'm a ex crackhead i can do anything i want bro okay you can't by the way 0.98

00:06:22.960 that guy tweeted about us recently it was very nice it was a nice tweet it was very nice sweet

00:06:27.400 bro i'm an ally yeah it was good i'm trying to be one but i just i i feel like we have a little

00:06:33.960 bit of a barrier and i i i am like almost like they consider me to me to be too aggressively 0.55

00:06:41.100 straight an asshole yeah that's what i said yo yo this is your episode this is your episode evan 0.98

00:06:47.580 this is going in circles there how how circle circle jerk we're back we're back back circle 1.00

00:06:52.860 jerking our boys hey buddy what up how the fuck are you dude uh i'm good i'm doing good um definitely 1.00

00:06:59.080 vulnerable. I'll be real right now. 0.99

00:07:02.600 I'm at a reset at a point in my

00:07:04.480 life right now. A what?

00:07:06.080 A reset? Does that make sense? For sure.

00:07:08.760 Not a midlife

00:07:10.320 crisis. A reset.

00:07:12.340 Trying to figure things out.

00:07:14.180 As you guys remember from my last episode, 0.91

00:07:16.680 I go, I don't know what the fuck I'm doing 0.95

00:07:18.360 with my life. And I walk out. 0.99

00:07:20.760 That was true. I did

00:07:22.480 not know what the fuck I was doing with my life. 0.97

00:07:25.120 Social media was fun. 0.98

00:07:26.400 It was dope. I had a good time. Good experiences.

00:07:28.580 did a lot of things that the majority of the people living on earth say they can't they have

00:07:33.580 it done which is cool but it was something that uh i definitely wasn't loving anymore um it wasn't

00:07:40.040 fun it was people start to get hateful too like more hateful as well and i'm also the whole dwarf

00:07:49.460 niche thing it comes to an end right like we get it like like playing into it yeah like we get it

00:07:54.300 you're a dwarf and um i didn't practice enough like trying to do my other

00:07:58.820 type of skills and comedy wise whether that's stand-up or just being funny um in person so 0.86

00:08:08.220 wait i called you dwarf mamba yeah at the beginning of the podcast yeah are you trying to like get

00:08:12.300 away from that a little bit okay a little bit but you can still that's why i'll always be as i mean

00:08:19.420 Internet-wise, Dwarf Mamba.

00:08:21.580 Because, bro, I'll never forget scrolling on Vine.

00:08:24.920 I got, like, 10,000 followers at the time.

00:08:27.120 You know, the beginning of my, like, real internet career and just seeing Dwarf Mamba pop up.

00:08:32.120 And you had these just hilarious Vines. 0.95

00:08:34.100 And so, to me, you know, you'll always.

00:08:37.520 It's like a legend.

00:08:38.320 It's a legend name.

00:08:39.140 Yeah. 0.97

00:08:39.420 Like, Dwarf Mamba.

00:08:40.760 It's hard. 1.00

00:08:41.660 I can't just be like, fuck it. 1.00

00:08:43.020 But they're not calling you that at work in Maryland? 1.00

00:08:45.360 No.

00:08:46.060 No.

00:08:46.440 Let me get into that.

00:08:47.220 I have a job now.

00:08:48.000 Yep.

00:08:48.360 Nine to five.

00:08:49.420 which i don't hate i really don't people probably how you work a job now no i like the authoritative

00:08:57.120 schedule i need that in my life i need that authoritative drive yep because i don't i don't

00:09:02.480 have drive i do not have self-drive hopefully i get it one day i don't know i don't know why i

00:09:07.020 keep looking at that camera by the way well that's where the people are that's you looking at the

00:09:11.080 audience yeah i like i like talking to them good anyways because i want someone hopefully they can

00:09:16.360 relate to they will i'm telling you you know but um yeah so like i said i need that like

00:09:20.840 authoritative schedule i might not like the job that i'm at right now but i need that drive like

00:09:25.640 i said i don't have it hopefully i will get it maybe this is like i said this is the reset i

00:09:29.820 need to find that extra skill or you know that self-skill to get me going into something else

00:09:35.500 yeah well said i i think you even recognizing that is really powerful like like i've never

00:09:41.920 heard you say that before until we were talking last night when you realize like the value of a

00:09:47.180 schedule for the type of person that you are because i don't want to say from my perspective

00:09:51.140 you don't like lack drive but if you know that you don't have enough to like maybe you know go

00:09:57.740 work on your own schedule yeah i could see how like a set schedule is is really good for you

00:10:02.460 yeah or literally someone to wake up being like yo this is what you're doing today

00:10:04.960 and you like and you like that yeah and be like okay like i'll get it done like getting the work

00:10:09.320 done like i'll get it done bro nine to five works really well for a lot of people that's why so many

00:10:14.520 people work nine to fives like yeah it's nine to five has been like villainized and made to look so

00:10:21.780 like non-pretty like you're working for the man guess what you get to do at five o'clock

00:10:27.000 stop working whatever you want you get to go and go home and do anything you want bro this grind

00:10:34.280 like like mentality that's been created over the past 10 years like

00:10:38.840 taken from someone who two people who have not stopped for the past eight years and and that

00:10:46.820 maybe you have as of like hella recently but like that second to second workload that that you you 0.99

00:10:55.480 wake up and the first thing you do is grab your phone hit email and you do not stop that shit 0.58

00:10:59.920 calls emails filming travel flight this that that until you go to sleep and then you wake up the next 0.99

00:11:04.860 day and do the same thing just to make a little bit more money or a lot more money than the person

00:11:09.180 that's working nine to five it doesn't work for everybody it's it really extremely taxing it can

00:11:14.820 be taxing exhausting it's not so it's sustainable so that and like um going back to why i quit 0.54

00:11:22.200 social media why it wasn't for me is also like correct me if i'm wrong you have to be a psycho 0.99

00:11:28.620 you have to be a little bit of a psycho you have to have no emotions you have to not give a fuck 0.98

00:11:33.860 you have to just do do do and like i i'm too human i'm too genuine i might sound it's gotten i don't 0.99

00:11:40.860 care it's gotten worse yeah way worse way worse and like yeah i'm like i can't do it like when

00:11:45.740 i'm streaming now like i'll always stream probably till i'm literally an adult that's my favorite

00:11:50.380 thing to do ever streaming um great way to connect with fans i'm game with my fans great way to 0.79

00:11:55.360 connected one like i said but now there's fuckers coming in the chat now and they think it's funny 0.51

00:12:00.420 it's called rage baiting or whatever yeah and they'd be like oh put the fry the whole talking 0.99

00:12:05.880 down in nine to five put put the fries in the bags bro it's like it's shut up yeah like well

00:12:13.440 you're making fun of someone who is like has a job at like mcdonald's not saying i have a job

00:12:18.580 at mcdonald's like a kid who's just trying to start their life and now we're like making fun 1.00

00:12:24.320 of that we're making fun of 16 17 anybody with a job we're making fun of that like shut the fuck 0.94

00:12:30.180 up so people will comment mean things to antagonize you to get yeah they react yeah like i don't react 0.92

00:12:35.880 like i don't give them the reaction but it's like i mean am i annoyed at the end of the day yeah but

00:12:40.200 i've learned to like not give up like i my fucks now are zero but this younger generation needs to 0.98

00:12:45.320 shut the fuck up about making fun of everyone for everything for every little thing what's the 0.98

00:12:50.520 difference between like making fun of and like a good old-fashioned roast because like we'll stay 0.99

00:12:54.100 here and roast the shit out of each other it's our lovely if roast is different than making fun 0.89

00:12:57.680 of roast is between your friends okay okay making fun is someone you don't know okay okay like you 0.98

00:13:02.980 can make a joke to me but i know since we already built a relationship i know you're coming from 1.00

00:13:07.720 love and it's a joke okay i don't know who the fuck you are shut the fuck up you want to know 1.00

00:13:11.960 you want to know what i hit the rage baiting is hitting now yeah yeah look at him we got him 1.00

00:13:18.180 Look how bad he is.

00:13:20.020 Now they're going to go double down on it.

00:13:21.980 Yeah, they are.

00:13:23.200 Now they're going to get mad.

00:13:24.380 But I don't give them that reaction in the chat.

00:13:26.960 Unless if they make fun.

00:13:28.840 Because they make short jokes or something.

00:13:31.180 I'll clap back.

00:13:32.700 And it's annoying on TikTok.

00:13:34.880 I'll clap back.

00:13:36.560 And someone will report me for bullying and harassing.

00:13:39.520 Then I'll get banned.

00:13:41.840 I'll go to TikTok. 1.00

00:13:43.000 I'm like, yo, fucking unbammy right now. 1.00

00:13:44.960 Oh, my God. 0.99

00:13:45.540 They're making fun of me. 1.00

00:13:46.400 I'm saying shit back. 1.00

00:13:47.120 and I'm banning right fucking now. 1.00

00:13:48.420 You got to end this shit. 1.00

00:13:49.600 I haven't been banned since I said, 1.00

00:13:51.080 since I said that I haven't been banned.

00:13:52.700 I emailed TikTok like, 0.99

00:13:54.240 yo, you got to stop this shit. 1.00

00:13:55.620 Like I have trolls in my chat. 1.00

00:13:57.060 I'm going to say shit back 0.99

00:13:58.860 and I'm not doing it in an angry way. 0.99

00:14:00.500 I'm doing it in a comedic comedy way.

00:14:02.840 I'll say something funny back.

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00:16:57.720 Lisa, we should tell them about our new show.

00:17:01.060 Oh my God, Lexi.

00:17:02.340 We have a new podcast. It's called Don't Lie to Me.

00:17:04.920 I'm Lexi Iwanu. We're two best friends, 22 years apart, but so close at heart.

00:17:10.820 And I'm Lisa DiGiulio, the old one, which means we have wildly different references,

00:17:15.440 occasionally different opinions. And at this point in my 50s, I've lived it all.

00:17:19.880 I'm not going to get anywhere fighting. That is wild. I learned that about you today.

00:17:26.380 Now in my 30s, being the founder of New Shoes, Good Taste is my business. And I've always got

00:17:32.640 something to say if men were just honest about this there would be so much more peace in the

00:17:37.340 world we're gonna talk about dating relationships beauty getting older and a little wiser we're

00:17:43.080 best friends but we don't always agree because you told us how accommodating you are obviously

00:17:48.160 i would do what i think i could do to to fight the fight but there's only so much fight i can fight

00:17:52.740 don't lie to me don't lie to me don't lie to me don't lie to me don't lie to me don't lie to me

00:17:58.800 Don't lie to me. 0.99

00:17:59.680 Liar. 0.94

00:18:00.400 Listen on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. 0.98

00:18:05.340 I don't really care.

00:18:07.600 When someone has a predisposition about like a little person or something, is there like

00:18:14.120 a name for it? 0.99

00:18:16.480 Like Dwarfist? 0.55

00:18:19.860 No, I've always wanted that.

00:18:21.420 It's got to be something.

00:18:23.760 Hightest?

00:18:25.600 Yeah, that works.

00:18:26.820 because because what you're what you're what what you're just what you're describing is a

00:18:30.420 prejudice against you and and that's what you're outlining in the email which is there's there's

00:18:34.700 validity in that the the problem is and we have mentioned this so many times evan you're such uh

00:18:41.080 like there's the you're the minority you are like a super minority of the minority yeah you know

00:18:49.200 what i'm saying we're our own category yeah it is what it is that's how it is like oh we're

00:18:54.120 literally our own category no one speaks for us we have no one who there's not a lot of

00:19:01.340 representation yeah from the outside that's what it looks like yeah and it's like all we're asking

00:19:06.520 for is respect yeah yeah but you're not yeah but you're the the issue is dude is like

00:19:11.800 your your chance of getting it currently in this atmosphere is zero and and the and the reason why

00:19:21.620 has absolutely nothing to do with you or your or or your afflicted people it is because

00:19:29.960 no one's getting it there's there's no more sensitive groups everyone's a sensitive group

00:19:34.620 they're coming after you it doesn't matter who you are i'm from they will find your weakness

00:19:39.420 heroin i was a heroin addict they will go at you they will bury you under that this

00:19:43.980 oh your parents were divorced oh you did this one slip up in the past every every the one way to make

00:19:50.540 to to become a sensitive group now is to have made a mistake ever in your life they will find

00:19:55.280 it they will pick at it i think yours is a little different though i don't mean to cut you off is

00:19:59.320 because you don't they don't look at you and go oh that guy's a half x heroin addict correct it's 0.74

00:20:04.340 not it's correct look at me i'm just fucking living dude yeah yeah and they're going out 0.95

00:20:09.060 of their way for instance great fucking example great example texted you guys in the chat 0.92

00:20:13.460 walking out of best buy just minding my own business 8 p.m walking out no cars in the 0.99

00:20:19.500 parking lot i was literally the only fucking person in best buy i'm walking out one car is 0.91

00:20:24.460 slowly driving by i think it's a fan i'm like oh they're probably gonna say something 0.97

00:20:28.720 guy pulls down the window he just goes how about you grow some you 0.85

00:20:33.700 oh my god where's that just best buy walking out of a fucking 8 p.m best buy no one's in the 0.98

00:20:42.000 literally no one's in the fucking parking lot no one's in the parking lot i'm not 0.98

00:20:46.580 gonna get into two details but the person went out of their way it was a group of them slow down 0.98

00:20:56.780 said how about you grow some you to hurt to hurl that as a stranger is wild young that's what i'm

00:21:03.360 getting young people young people yes how old

00:21:05.760 16 to 18 the hooligan stage yeah like that's it's a that's a tough age dude those those no i get it

00:21:15.040 i get it i've never done it including with my friends growing up i've never ever gone out of 1.00

00:21:21.860 my way to make fun of someone who's just in public i never go damn you fat as fuck damn you black as 1.00

00:21:30.600 black as shit never how about you get whiter how about you get taller i've never done taking your 1.00

00:21:39.220 opportunity I was with you want to hit us with my friends who did that but yo shut the fuck up 1.00

00:21:45.380 no of course you have a different perspective as well though like like I would say because of who 0.99

00:21:50.260 you are you have an elevated perspective of what it means to be respectful and and how it can feel

00:21:55.620 to be at the opposite end of someone poking fun so you do it less I don't know if that's true

00:22:01.220 Because he certainly can fire off, too.

00:22:04.420 He can fire off.

00:22:06.100 You can fire off.

00:22:07.240 And the person who said that.

00:22:07.820 Like, he actually fires off maybe more than anyone I know, to be honest. 1.00

00:22:11.340 I can say shit. 1.00

00:22:12.220 You can dish it out. 1.00

00:22:13.200 I can say shit that the people have you thinking. 0.99

00:22:16.560 No, but see, do you know what I'm saying? 0.99

00:22:18.080 So this is.

00:22:19.480 Hold on, hold on.

00:22:20.420 Let's pause for a sec.

00:22:22.360 Slow down.

00:22:23.260 So I guess this is my question.

00:22:25.620 It's like a couple things here.

00:22:28.900 When is it okay?

00:22:29.680 When is it not okay?

00:22:31.220 as a society i don't mean just for one afflicted group and then for me like my biggest thing is 0.61

00:22:37.260 you'll never be you you you no one in this room no one in this world will ever be able to control

00:22:44.520 or manipulate the environment around them the only thing you will ever be able to do is manipulate

00:22:49.760 your reaction to it that's it that is the only that is the only thing you're ever trying to do

00:22:53.600 in life i remember for the first like three four years all throughout dating lana i had this my

00:22:59.640 skin was still relatively thin i would start stuff would get through i i put out a great book i put

00:23:06.120 out a bunch of great shows i made some money made the parents proud bought them a car bought my own 0.99

00:23:10.340 crib got a good girl whatever all that shit you could stand in my face for an hour and scream at 0.99

00:23:16.260 me every hurtful insult in the world and there my my blood pressure would not rise by a percentage 1.00

00:23:21.820 point i i'm i am when i when you say zero fucks i am unaffected like literally unaffected by 0.64

00:23:28.180 anything in the world around me how did i get there by creating at least some semblance of the 0.97

00:23:34.220 me that i wanted to create and now i'm able to stand on that shit in the face of anything 0.93

00:23:39.280 there's literally no comment no online thing your girl's a whole like it does it's i just see 0.99

00:23:45.340 garbage i just see garbage i see occasionally i'll say oh this is a sad human or oh this is 0.90

00:23:50.720 a young kid what did you think when duke dennis was risen up your girl 0.99

00:23:53.680 if you go and rewind the footage to three seconds after that clip ended they look at me and they go 0.91

00:24:02.940 thank you that's gonna go so fucking by really and i go bro obviously dude like you think this 0.61

00:24:08.660 is my first rodeo we were doing that stuff with lana back in the day you would put her in bed 0.98

00:24:12.980 with david the german videographer and we would set up cheating yeah bro they go viral on fucking

00:24:17.260 they were like how did you know to do that i'm like bro i've been in the game welcome to the 0.92

00:24:21.300 yeah you play the character like i've been here for 10 years now you know what i'm saying sure

00:24:25.400 so i knew i knew what you were doing but it was just it definitely was but but then after i did 0.61

00:24:30.200 it i was like fuck this is gonna go viral and it's gonna turn into a thing i want to go back 0.94

00:24:34.500 you're talking about you as a person um how you are now how you're this thick skin i'm i'm at that 0.98

00:24:41.360 point too now and i've also had to sit and think you know also mentally go through that get to that

00:24:47.820 tough stage i'm thinking about all the other little people kids who have messaged me talking

00:24:55.840 about taking their life because they don't feel accepted and like i'm just thinking about those

00:25:02.700 kids i'm just thinking about them i'm i i grew up in a very fortunate life i've grew up great school

00:25:08.840 great town great friends great people all around me always so i don't know what it's like to

00:25:12.920 literally be outcasted you might have to become the representation that you've always yearned for

00:25:21.360 in your community and how that happens i'm not sure but you've all you've always been so vocal

00:25:28.320 about it and i've always found it like like fascinating you guys are like the last minority 0.61

00:25:35.240 group to like have a real fucking voice and not be um the aha of the thing or or be like whoa 0.98

00:25:43.560 like that's that's fucked up yeah like people don't go like whoa that's pretty fucked up to 0.99

00:25:47.400 say no they don't think that yeah yeah did you just fart yeah yeah i know i felt like a vibration 0.99

00:25:53.180 i felt the vibration through through the couch i felt the shockwave of your fart because you just 1.00

00:25:58.380 made me a plate of eggs did you like it well yeah but you know what eggs do the eggs fuck you that's 0.99

00:26:04.480 what i'm saying i'm feeling and you make them runny no i just said that he makes them i didn't 0.99

00:26:08.980 mean he's so runny i cook 12 at a time i've never done that i've never cooked that many 12 0.98

00:26:13.780 i go it's cooked enough he goes yeah just take it what am i in fucking england 1.00

00:26:17.680 why does he not cook their eggs no oh soupy eggs soupy england work on your shit work on your 0.99

00:26:26.360 so i was gonna ask you what how long are you gonna do this dwarfism for yeah i guess you're 0.99

00:26:31.800 right let's he doesn't even want to talk about it i'm kidding i i but i we have covered it on

00:26:36.700 other shows no i just i i i think i think you're awesome and i think like you you're gonna be that 0.97

00:26:42.260 guy bro fuck these people if you not not dwarves but if i'm okay i'm okay don't think about me i'm 0.85

00:26:50.460 okay don't talk like you're talking to me i'm okay it's literally all the only person i'm thinking 1.00

00:26:56.340 about are the dork kids.

00:26:58.220 Only when I, that's, when people say 1.00

00:27:00.340 shit to me, yeah, I might get mad 0.99

00:27:02.000 and I think it's personally affecting me. 0.99

00:27:04.180 I'm literally thinking about other dorks out

00:27:06.280 there who are going through the same 1.00

00:27:07.760 fucking shit 1.00

00:27:09.340 and they don't have the history 1.00

00:27:12.320 I've had where I've established 1.00

00:27:14.240 myself and I know that I'm the shit. 1.00

00:27:17.080 Like, 0.99

00:27:18.440 I'm just thinking about them.

00:27:19.500 Can I ask you a scientific

00:27:21.860 question? Oh, God.

00:27:26.340 i know because it's i'm it's not it's it's sensitive okay if you if at what point

00:27:35.300 at what there's so many different types of dwarves right like different types of dwarves

00:27:41.560 yeah over 200 so this question might not work then i was gonna ask at what point

00:27:48.080 does are you legally a dwarf yes because you've reached an age because you've reached an age

00:27:53.900 where you should be bigger than you are at that time it's not it's not it's not it's not a height

00:28:00.420 thing okay when you're literally your bones what you're born okay so when you're a door but when 0.96

00:28:04.420 you're a dwarf baby but when you're a dwarf baby right yeah you are still the same size as a normal 0.64

00:28:11.600 baby yes okay then when you're a dwarf one-year-old yeah are you still the same no you're already 0.96

00:28:18.120 starting to slowly no it's slow it's a slow process it's slow it's super slow and it's a

00:28:24.640 uh i don't know too much about it medically yeah i'm getting scientific but it's literally a bone

00:28:30.420 to fit essentially a bone deficiency and it's like progressive yeah it just slows down got it

00:28:35.840 that's literally it so when i hate that shit when it's like oh i'm too short i guess i'm legally a 0.98

00:28:41.820 dwarf like shut the no yeah it's not a legal thing you're not gonna go to jail you're not 0.98

00:28:47.760 going to get in jail if they can make door fraud like poor guy possibly could be a thing it's like 0.99

00:28:55.360 a handicap faking a handicap maybe you can do it oh shit you definitely can't you definitely can't 0.99

00:29:02.420 park right in front of that best buy i swear to god i'm not lying bro i swear to god i'm a dwarf 0.99

00:29:08.140 so evan you mentioned earlier yeah maybe finding that drive finding that motivation

00:29:12.860 how do you think that'll happen do you have you thought about that at all

00:29:17.340 was finding the my what's going to be what is my purpose in this field and so i tried out through

00:29:25.000 acting um i've gotten roles few roles auditions but a lot of the in auditions were your typical

00:29:34.420 dwarf role yep the elf and you don't want to do that i don't want to do that then that's another

00:29:39.520 thing where it comes with hollywood and shit where they don't do a good enough help with us

00:29:45.720 as well is like there's no dwarf characters like as a just a as a friend as a character as a

00:29:52.860 character friend yeah like the only one last one really one i can think of is seinfeld with kramer 0.87

00:29:58.000 and um his dwarf buddy that's the only tv series that has a game of thrones but that's fucking

00:30:07.800 different Seinfeld still holds up yeah I just watched sorry I'm just no Mike I was like you 0.94

00:30:14.000 know going off well no I was listening to what you yeah but I was listening to what you said 0.95

00:30:17.400 and I don't fucking dare you talk about fucking listening comprehension you can't he does it he 1.00

00:30:21.460 does it way better than you no fuck you he's bad he's bad he's bad he's bad he sucks he does it way 1.00

00:30:26.440 better at listening you're worse he cuts me off you're worse he cuts me off all the time you're 1.00

00:30:29.760 worse I'm leaving right now you should walk no not the show I'm leaving right now this episode 0.78

00:30:34.640 You like Seinfeld

00:30:36.980 You like Seinfeld

00:30:38.380 I was just saying

00:30:39.740 You watch it stuff these days

00:30:42.360 In Maryland

00:30:43.160 Yeah what do you ingest

00:30:45.980 Yeah you consume it anything

00:30:47.100 So that's another thing that I guess

00:30:50.100 I don't watch new things

00:30:52.760 I watch the same thing over and over again

00:30:54.640 Like always sunny in Philadelphia

00:30:58.040 I can tell you an episode

00:30:59.940 Oh really

00:31:01.020 Such a great show

00:31:02.200 great show and i love like especially if it's comedy i love i will study it like i will study

00:31:08.600 if i love it the comedy i'll study the show i'll study how their timing why that worked

00:31:13.680 that's funny i'm gonna use that you've gotten funnier appreciate that you have gotten funnier

00:31:18.180 i've been working trying to do that it's it's interesting because you went home to a place

00:31:21.980 that is like like the arts aren't celebrated nearly as much as the hollywood environment

00:31:26.020 you were living in and now you're in you know small town maryland where you grew up

00:31:29.120 and your ability for comedy has actually gotten better.

00:31:34.180 Dude, you were making really funny jokes last night.

00:31:38.760 Bro, this dude has always had the capability.

00:31:42.160 I've never been that aware of it, and that's where it was kind of going.

00:31:46.700 It was layered comedy.

00:31:48.600 It was the deepest level of comedy.

00:31:50.140 Maybe you just had a little bit more time and space for good old Evan

00:31:54.720 than you used to because you used to be really like, bro, me and –

00:31:59.120 There's no one in the world, really, besides no one that can get me to belly laugh.

00:32:04.280 We just did it just now.

00:32:05.440 When we found a cup of water.

00:32:07.300 We riffed.

00:32:07.820 About a cup of water.

00:32:09.080 About a cup of water that we found in the cabinet.

00:32:11.580 Like, why is there a half?

00:32:12.540 We riffed for three minutes.

00:32:13.220 But that's how me and you always work.

00:32:14.800 Straight laugh.

00:32:15.220 We would always just do that and go down tangents.

00:32:17.960 Yeah.

00:32:18.280 And I wonder if because you have now settled into this, like, not always working, Logan,

00:32:23.180 where you get a chance to actually spend time with people.

00:32:25.360 No, it's great.

00:32:26.700 Yes, but he's not the only person who said that, is what I was kind of getting at. 0.98

00:32:33.100 Because people are like, damn, why are you wittier? 0.98

00:32:35.980 You're quicker with it now. 0.99

00:32:38.260 I'm just like, I don't know.

00:32:40.160 And going back to the field, finding my purpose, which in comedy, I've always thought about stand-up.

00:32:46.900 People have told me over time, time and again, yo, you need to stand up.

00:32:49.660 You need to do stand-up.

00:32:50.780 Again, never had a confidence, never had the drive.

00:32:54.020 I've built the confidence.

00:32:55.820 Yeah.

00:32:56.700 working on the drive right now but my confidence is the highest it's ever been ever like and i'm

00:33:04.100 like i'm just i'm just proud yeah of myself yeah like when people i know i keep spewing off sorry 0.58

00:33:10.720 when people come in my shit and go like you fell off that doesn't hurt me because i've never thought

00:33:17.580 i was at a place to fall off like you saying i fell off that's actually a compliment because 0.99

00:33:23.240 you're saying like dude you were like the biggest blah blah blah oh and i was like uh what i didn't 0.57

00:33:28.380 think i'm shit i might have done a few things might have cute people i i don't think i've done 0.91

00:33:33.080 any what i want to do fair so like that's not really an insult for me there there's nothing 0.96

00:33:38.700 like i said i fell off well in that way you know it is only up from here yeah and i i see it so

00:33:45.220 clearly for you we we spoke about this last night at dinner but like man i think in the same way like

00:33:50.980 matt rife did comedy and then syndicated clips and got super famous on tiktok whatever i could

00:33:59.320 see you like really slowly bottom up building a comedy career and then just being like a really

00:34:05.060 funny stand-up comedian especially with tiktok nowadays it kills on comedy kills on you know

00:34:12.420 what you know why else it's i i already told you all of this last night but why it works is i'm

00:34:17.120 want to reiterate it again because we were drinking a little bit so dude go to you're in

00:34:21.560 maryland you don't got to go to new york city or like la to do a to do a stand-up show yeah go to

00:34:27.520 like your local improv maryland um um little bar yeah whatever with this 10 people watching

00:34:33.340 just just just riff doesn't matter it doesn't matter no no i was just thinking about evan in

00:34:37.920 the in like the midst of like the hardest neighborhood of baltimore like where the

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00:36:13.180 Breaking story from Alpine News Network.

00:36:16.440 Homeowners Tony and Janet needed to consolidate their debt.

00:36:19.720 They called Alpine Credits.

00:36:21.740 In a flash, an Alpine Credits superhero appeared in their kitchen.

00:36:26.120 Using telekinesis, she consolidated their debt into one low monthly payment.

00:36:30.540 she then used her powers to make the dirty dishes disappear forever own your home need alone

00:36:37.600 alpine credits can help alpine credits where homeowners get approved lisa we should tell

00:36:45.400 them about our new show oh my god lexi we have a new podcast it's called don't lie to me i'm

00:36:51.520 we're two best friends 22 years apart but so close at heart and i'm lisa di julio the old one

00:36:58.940 which means we have wildly different references, occasionally different opinions.

00:37:02.840 And at this point in my 50s, I've lived it all.

00:37:05.980 I'm not going to get anywhere fighting.

00:37:08.460 That is wild.

00:37:09.880 I learned that about you today.

00:37:12.520 Now in my 30s, being the founder of New Shoes, Good Taste is my business.

00:37:17.700 And I've always got something to say.

00:37:19.920 If men were just honest about this, there would be so much more peace in the world.

00:37:23.640 We're going to talk about dating, relationships, beauty, getting older and a little wiser.

00:37:28.940 We're best friends, but we don't always agree.

00:37:31.300 Because you told us how accommodating you are.

00:37:33.840 Obviously, I would do what I think I could do to fight the fight,

00:37:37.240 but there's only so much fight I can fight.

00:37:39.320 Don't lie to me.

00:37:40.120 Don't lie to me.

00:37:41.460 Don't lie to me.

00:37:42.700 Don't lie to me.

00:37:43.920 Don't lie to me.

00:37:44.940 Don't lie to me. 1.00

00:37:45.740 Liar. 0.98

00:37:46.540 Listen on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, 0.98

00:37:49.660 or wherever you get your podcasts.

00:37:51.400 I don't really care. 0.97

00:37:53.760 Shot. 0.98

00:37:54.800 Put Stringer Bell.

00:37:56.840 Stringer Bell is there.

00:37:58.940 with a shotgun

00:38:03.180 start off shotgun

00:38:05.240 nah but

00:38:08.580 why it works is you can

00:38:10.700 A hone your skills in front of a small audience

00:38:13.160 but B if you film

00:38:15.000 your sets and one of them

00:38:16.900 hits after the fact

00:38:18.760 you know what's funny you know

00:38:20.420 oh this was a funny little clip

00:38:22.560 this will hit on TikTok so you can essentially

00:38:24.980 highlight real yourself while building

00:38:26.860 your skills in real life

00:38:28.720 and your social media in social life.

00:38:31.960 Yeah, it's still holding that social media thing too.

00:38:34.860 Yeah, I agree.

00:38:35.360 I like that.

00:38:35.680 And I love how, you know, you've moved home

00:38:38.720 and that reset can be so good for people.

00:38:41.460 Yeah.

00:38:41.740 So good for people.

00:38:42.420 In the beginning, I was down and depressed 0.99

00:38:45.880 because in my head I'm thinking, fuck, I failed. 0.98

00:38:48.000 I get like, I was out there. 0.99

00:38:50.980 I didn't do enough that I could have done. 0.99

00:38:53.380 You know, I was like fucking, 0.97

00:38:54.720 it took me a few months at first because I was down. 0.97

00:38:57.800 i had to move back in with my parents a little bit and it's like you know going from that life 0.98

00:39:03.120 to going back essentially where you started yes it can be like oh fuck like damn it but 0.98

00:39:08.900 i got over that instead of thinking sorry for myself or sad for myself let's fucking use that 0.99

00:39:14.760 let's use that now to find maybe a different confidence level of confidence different drive 0.63

00:39:21.000 and move on reset let's get better cool cool levin you know that's awesome dude and uh some people

00:39:27.820 some people need that some people don't they can just keep going being successful that's dope like

00:39:33.100 joe rogan said the best um the best story he likes to hear is not that it's just a straight

00:39:38.600 successful guy it's the guy who essentially failed has a comeback story it is when that when you said

00:39:44.640 like joe rogan says it best i didn't say first off did not said says it best did not say that

00:39:50.700 you're twisting my words i said like joe grogan said oh oh you anyways yeah you tend to do that

00:39:57.160 though but like joe rogan said when you said that i was like dude this could be so many things

00:40:01.980 i was like bro this could be so many like dude like i didn't know if you're gonna just go into

00:40:08.100 a bit about ivermectin like i didn't know where you're gonna go with that bro of course

00:40:12.280 so there's horse to work like i didn't just shoot yourself off yeah exactly anyways no

00:40:18.800 no but um there's just sometimes when people say things it like that no matter who it is it

00:40:24.400 it sticks with me i'll replay it in my head see i see that doesn't happen to me because i don't

00:40:29.200 listen to anything i'm a terrible listener that's not true that's that and that's the

00:40:34.600 unfortunate part about you if you just activate yourself you're not wrong bro if you're invested

00:40:38.900 in the conversation you're a great soundboard yeah but but you're just never you well well

00:40:44.480 tune out so well no you do not so quick you do not quit so as soon as you're done with whatever 0.98

00:40:49.060 you got to say that's done and we don't mean to attack you i have my flaws too i'm not fucking 0.92

00:40:52.900 perfect but you do and it does hurt like you just shut off and you're like okay well this guy doesn't

00:40:57.720 so so i'll speak for everybody out there watching this that has adhd because i've i obviously have

00:41:04.180 severe hyperactivity the reason why i tune out sometimes is because you're bored no i unfortunately

00:41:13.060 already know everything you're about to say fair and i can actually repeat it back to you verbatim

00:41:17.880 before you say it yeah i can't do it right now because we're we're in the middle of topics

00:41:23.300 but if if if one of you stopped mid-topic i will finish the next 15 minutes of your story

00:41:27.940 my brain works in a very strange way you uh and i always have a great question ready you would

00:41:33.600 have had a hard time at our thanksgiving dinner i had i had to not i didn't have to but like i'm 0.97

00:41:40.060 the asshole of the family yeah whatever and man pam pam just hijacked my mom hijacked the meal 0.89

00:41:48.240 with a story she told for 20 minutes about about her uh confronting someone who thought the jake 0.99

00:41:55.500 tyson fight was was rigged and like a bad fight like by the way no sorry they didn't even say it

00:42:00.240 was rigged he just thought it was a bad fight and she was basically like your opinion's wrong

00:42:04.060 so i not only was like well it's a is was there how is it how is there like this with the one

00:42:08.680 with the last 20 minutes i don't know because the video was also recorded of her confronting this

00:42:13.400 guy and the video was only six minutes so that's why i had seen it dude and i so if at 18 minutes

00:42:19.300 i'm like mom like how are you doing this because you could have just showed the video we could

00:42:23.740 have moved on and then i i prompted her with another question and she's another 10 15 minutes

00:42:28.680 in i go and then at one point i i started to like do my rebuttal i'm like well here's the opposite

00:42:34.040 side maybe he just didn't like the fight she's like you're gonna let me talk you're not gonna

00:42:38.760 let me talk i had to go mom you've been speaking the whole dinner like perhaps truncating the story

00:42:45.260 would be better for everyone here and then greg was like did you say trump trump cadence yeah

00:42:50.300 all right let me don't even get me started on you know what's so funny you're so right like

00:42:55.860 greg is a big personality with his own like he'll hear something and go and so will my mom and so

00:43:00.280 will jake and so will i and it was the first like time we really got together for thanksgiving 0.93

00:43:05.420 and i realized um how fucked up we are i'm not gonna lie and different i'm not gonna lie to you 0.93

00:43:13.820 we we we don't like we don't mess dude it's crazy you told me but you told me to come 0.97

00:43:20.840 i love all of the people separate the individual or yeah but when i thought of the idea of coming

00:43:32.240 into this oh it was wild all the four i thought about that plus the baby i was like bro i'm gonna

00:43:41.360 have a fucking aneurysm it was it was worse than you think i'm sure it was great no no everyone's 0.74

00:43:47.920 It was awesome and refreshing. 0.99

00:43:50.180 I love my family, but I realized what I appreciate about my family is truly how fucking chaotic we all are and, like, individually fucked up. 0.98

00:44:00.780 So, together, I have to call it out. 0.98

00:44:03.760 Like, we don't have chemistry.

00:44:05.360 We got no chemistry.

00:44:06.900 Me and my family.

00:44:07.700 Me and Jake do.

00:44:10.000 But sometimes, man, like.

00:44:11.140 Well, I don't know.

00:44:11.660 On that last episode you guys did, you guys got called out for your lack of chemistry.

00:44:17.140 but that is the chemistry i know it's two brothers so like just so like no you just

00:44:21.700 whatever we got to be awkward like it's uh it's interesting like as an adult now and all of us

00:44:30.540 are adults like spending time as a family because it's it's not something i've i've done i wanted to

00:44:35.980 uh just just circle back because um what you're saying is uh i'm my mic yeah mike you're mike

00:44:42.320 i'm like yeah yeah it's mike it's mike well you just it's not when you said what you were saying

00:44:50.060 it seemed like maybe you'd forgotten who i was oh maybe maybe maybe but uh yeah so when my mom

00:44:56.840 was telling this long story and by the way i gave her the note i was just like i was just like mom

00:45:00.620 like i i love you so much yeah perhaps there's an opportunity to uh yeah truncate your story

00:45:07.060 because like that was an example why i even went off on that tangent of what mike's saying in that

00:45:12.080 like you know what she's gonna say next type thing and so like you would have had a hard you

00:45:17.880 would have had a hard time at that thanksgiving oh because oh because it was just so it was so

00:45:22.880 predictable and by the way by the way by the way i'm i'm the same way i want to clarify i'm the 0.97

00:45:28.140 asshole of the family some people were invested i'm the asshole too some people weren't you know 0.96

00:45:33.460 half of the people at the table were really engaged and the other half wasn't and so like 0.99

00:45:38.020 i don't know like i'm i don't need yeah i gave her feedback about something that like that like

00:45:43.460 i didn't need to this is my this is my sweet brother i didn't say i didn't say i know i know 0.92

00:45:48.460 you know how much he loves to give his notes well because this dude is the fucking he'll give a note 0.96

00:45:53.260 to anybody well dude it's just like a note to a squirrel do i see an opportunity for the squirrel 0.99

00:45:58.580 to improve a little note when you grab that nut yeah he could be more efficient he could be more

00:46:04.660 He was giving notes to Phantom on streaming last episode.

00:46:09.140 People were like, bro, would this dude just give notes?

00:46:11.460 And you want to know the worst thing that ever happened?

00:46:14.600 When he used to say to me, it would be this like complex thing.

00:46:20.580 And he would give me this like feedback.

00:46:23.480 And I would give him a response to his feedback.

00:46:25.980 And it would go back and forth. 1.00

00:46:26.840 And he would always say, just take the fucking note. 1.00

00:46:29.220 It's so simple. 1.00

00:46:29.880 Just take the note.

00:46:30.900 Right?

00:46:31.580 And I always hated when he would say that.

00:46:33.520 gonna be like well it's not simple because you're either accusing me of something or telling me i

00:46:37.240 need to change something that i don't agree with your assessment so i'm not gonna just take the 0.90

00:46:40.840 note i'm gonna fucking retort that shit bro and tell you why you might be wrong we can have a 0.97

00:46:45.340 conversation about he's like not take the fucking note so i always hated that so much and recently 0.99

00:46:50.000 like two months ago i was telling sarah something in an argument and she kept pushing back and i 0.98

00:46:55.700 said bro why are you being so stubborn just take the note take the note take the note so so it gets

00:47:00.760 even worse than that two days ago she was telling me something and i pushed back on her and she 0.97

00:47:05.900 told me to take the fucking no and i was like no bro i've created a cycle of no taking it was so 0.93

00:47:15.200 bad it came right back to me yes because sometimes like dude it's so it's so just 0.98

00:47:23.200 nina gets it now yeah she pushes back on something where i'm like yo just take the

00:47:29.880 know well here's i don't like well here's the real answer or don't let's move on that's it

00:47:34.400 that's it i don't give a real answer is just really at that point in a lot of confrontations

00:47:39.680 in life and a lot of conflicts either take the note or take the note like bro the one of the

00:47:45.800 greatest things anyone ever told me in life was just say yes and then do whatever you want because

00:47:51.180 that's so good a lot of times they just want to hear you agree that you're going to do you know

00:47:54.900 what i'm saying just good get yourself out of the conflict agree to whatever they're saying

00:47:59.640 and then just do whatever you're going to do anyways.

00:48:01.500 You know what I'm saying?

00:48:02.040 I'd do that, but I never thought of it like that.

00:48:04.600 I just do it so I'm not in the conflict.

00:48:06.660 That's what I'm saying.

00:48:07.820 If I'm literally like me and like, just here's an idea.

00:48:12.680 I'm more conservative side.

00:48:14.420 If I'm with a liberal and we're talking and arguing about something

00:48:18.080 and I know it's not going to get anywhere,

00:48:20.740 or like I just know, like I will agree with them just to.

00:48:24.540 Agree, almost agree to disagree.

00:48:26.380 Or just be like, yeah, I can see where you're coming from

00:48:28.380 and not give my point of view

00:48:29.960 just so I don't have that argument.

00:48:33.080 That's a mature perspective.

00:48:34.440 No, it's a sigma perspective.

00:48:36.920 You're elevated. 1.00

00:48:38.040 I don't do that naturally.

00:48:39.340 Do you know how many people right now 0.99

00:48:40.320 are spending their fucking days 0.98

00:48:41.620 right after maybe even pausing this episode 0.99

00:48:43.820 to go argue with someone

00:48:45.000 about left versus right politics?

00:48:47.380 I get to do that on Twitter a lot. 1.00

00:48:49.680 Dude, it has to be the dumbest, 1.00

00:48:52.160 lowest vibrating conversation 1.00

00:48:54.100 you could ever fucking have. 0.98

00:48:55.440 It's different on the internet, though. 0.96

00:48:57.800 it's so easy on the internet because you're not with that person so you don't know their feelings

00:49:02.100 when you're it's so easy to dodge in person you're just like i don't want to it's not about ease

00:49:06.420 it's not about ease it's about time spent dog well that you want it you want to you want to sit 0.99

00:49:11.580 and talk either in person or online about politics for what yeah why the fuck you doing it go get 0.92

00:49:20.200 some money is that part of the reason you deleted x was i catching i i believe that i still have my 0.88

00:49:27.500 account just in case but i deleted the app thousand percent because i would catch myself

00:49:31.260 literally wasting time at the time like arguing with people and i'm like it'll be like 9 a.m i'm 0.97

00:49:37.180 fucking heated mad i'm fucking i'm like and i'm like this doesn't fucking matter who the fuck is 0.96

00:49:42.600 yeah what the fuck am i doing yeah and like i was like that's all twitter is it's just arguing or x 0.99

00:49:48.400 what the fuck it is now you know what it's become now i don't even know drones over new jersey and 0.99

00:49:54.080 louise mangione but yes drones over new jersey first what are they why are they here you told 0.99

00:49:58.800 me last week major developments were coming in the case for aliens and alien crafts in the united

00:50:04.480 states not a week later days later the drones have appeared over the coast of new jersey by

00:50:09.560 the time this episode is released i'm sure there will be something but as of right now they've been

00:50:14.000 levitating there for days the u.s government is not telling us anything they're not telling the

00:50:18.140 new jersey governor anything we will not we are not shooting them down what are they why are they

00:50:23.740 there that's the question mike well i don't think it's really that deep it's it's incredibly deep

00:50:29.440 and it's it's that's but i don't do i want to look that brother no you don't and that's why

00:50:33.960 it's not getting attention because people don't want to face the reality that there's something

00:50:39.580 in the sky that are even our government does not know what it is and if they do know they're lying

00:50:44.800 about it okay they said it's not a foreign adversary or entity i don't think they said

00:50:48.760 that yes they did they did they said it is full on full stop yes not a four yes 100 i just saw

00:50:54.200 actually yeah when did that they said it was the clip it's not u.s drones the fbi doesn't know

00:50:59.380 anything the local law enforcement doesn't know it that's what they're telling us how are they

00:51:02.900 saying it's not us and it's not them brother that's what exactly and that's what i told you

00:51:07.100 two weeks ago 2025 i think will be one of the most significant years in human history when it

00:51:13.400 comes to discovery let's see if there's any in terms of intelligence and non-human intelligence

00:51:18.140 which begs the question what what does it mean what is human intelligence which i don't have 0.96

00:51:25.260 to dive in but i will say this this shit is getting super real i've been reading which is 0.98

00:51:32.380 crazy because i haven't read a book in 15 fucking years yeah i will say what i do is i kind of cheat 0.99

00:51:38.080 I'll read the words on the page 0.98

00:51:40.420 while listening to the book on Audible.

00:51:42.740 And it really helps me get through a book.

00:51:44.580 I never even thought about that.

00:51:45.760 Dude, it's basically like someone

00:51:46.920 reading the story to you as you are...

00:51:49.000 It's like a double ingestion

00:51:50.620 of the knowledge in the book.

00:51:54.000 I've always had a problem

00:51:55.240 retaining information.

00:51:56.580 That's why I don't read. 0.99

00:51:57.220 My comprehension skills are ass. 0.99

00:51:58.340 So... 0.99

00:51:58.660 Like, test taking.

00:52:00.000 Yeah.

00:52:00.240 I came to English test tasting. 1.00

00:52:01.460 I was an idiot. 1.00

00:52:02.620 Yeah. 1.00

00:52:02.960 Math.

00:52:03.680 And it's not your fault.

00:52:04.940 Yeah, I just...

00:52:05.580 I'm bored.

00:52:06.120 I get bored. 0.98

00:52:06.700 Yep, it's how your brain is.

00:52:07.680 And so like for me, I used to love reading that I like when I was really young and I stopped, but that's my little cheat code. So I've been reading imminent by Lou Elizondo. This one next American cosmic. And then UFOs and nukes like we, I sound crazy. I am the crazy person, but I'm, I'm, I'm super open minded. And one of the people that's willing to have the conversation about the hard fact that we are not alone in this universe.

00:52:31.620 and what that means, I'm looking to explore

00:52:33.980 and I'm gonna be hopefully part of some big conversations

00:52:36.920 that push that narrative forward

00:52:38.380 because check this out, 0.96

00:52:40.940 you know, 1950s, flying saucers, you're crazy. 1.00

00:52:45.480 You fucking belong in the psych ward. 1.00

00:52:47.280 You believe in aliens? 1.00

00:52:49.300 Let's make them a part of pop culture.

00:52:51.320 Let's make them a part of mainstream TV

00:52:53.820 and sort of like sensationalize this idea of aliens, 0.97

00:52:56.580 but aliens don't exist, you're crazy.

00:52:58.620 Some years pass, some more credible people

00:53:01.100 start coming forward with their their narrative of things they've seen and then we start getting

00:53:06.100 technology that can actually track these things multiple sensors that can track these things

00:53:11.040 whether it's thermal whether it's radar whether it's a credible pilot's visual of these things

00:53:15.020 and so now early 2000s starting to look a little bit more real and then some videos start to leak

00:53:21.860 and then the government itself says okay they are real oops they're real but uh we don't know

00:53:30.940 what they are either so now we're we are at i believe the cusp of real disclosure from the

00:53:38.100 united states government about our place in the universe and i don't know what that means whether

00:53:44.200 it's a spiritual entity entity whether it's a foreign adversary whether it's united states

00:53:49.420 technology that's been successfully reverse engineered over the past 70 years whether it's

00:53:53.640 combination of all three uh uh or even even a hoax of sorts whatever it is i was talking to

00:54:01.060 someone who's in this the answer to all these questions i believe is sensational it is going

00:54:09.500 to be fucking astounding what if it's not yeah what if it's how could it not be what if it's 1.00

00:54:14.700 how could it not what if it's just what if it's pam drank too much wines flying stupid fucking 0.99

00:54:19.180 drones that jake paul paid i'm not necessarily sorry sorry zoom out even more i'm not talking 0.99

00:54:23.620 about new jersey drones which are now in oregon by the way both both coasts of the united states

00:54:27.820 and one and one over and washington state it's been reported you are you are looking at the 0.97

00:54:34.440 beginning of a fucking sci-fi movie dog i swear to god pull up x and look at these new news clips 0.96

00:54:39.040 drones sighted over blah blah blah and everyone's like u.s air force based germany u.s air force 0.99

00:54:45.400 i'm telling you dog the sightings are getting more and more how uh the movie independence day

00:54:50.160 started where they where the ships appeared everywhere no one knew what they were yeah bro

00:54:53.920 and then and then the people are partying on the roof with the signs like welcome we love you and

00:54:59.320 then that beam just came down and zapped the building yes and then will smith had to save 0.97

00:55:03.700 everybody with love will smith and um who's the other guy kev kev can you toss me a prime damn 0.99

00:55:08.180 huge actor yeah we only remember wow i'm a piece of shit no no no um i'm tom cruise no no oh my 0.99

00:55:14.640 guys i wouldn't say dan i just saw a video oh it's it's oh the dude from fucking jurassic park 0.99

00:55:20.140 i'm an asshole i need oh oh jeff goldblum i should have known that one of the greatest 0.83

00:55:26.080 actors such a strange but like will smith joe no no no no just saving goldblum it's just his 0.98

00:55:33.220 whole aura so so amazing so jeff goldblum's aura could that could that captivate the non-human

00:55:40.960 intelligence that's allegedly here's my question has been who's going to be the first to greet him

00:55:45.360 now logan is logan has said bar none he is the right option i don't disagree but i think

00:55:53.780 i think if you throw logan in you have to also put bad bobby who bad bad baby the hobby baby

00:56:00.760 baby bad baby that h is kind of bad bad bad bad bobby and and i guess i guess hot two is out now

00:56:12.100 anywho i'm going to bed good night y'all she just never woke up

00:56:24.380 Bro, she went to bed like two weeks ago

00:56:29.040 She cut the dude off

00:56:31.520 Well, anywho

00:56:32.880 I'm going to bed, y'all

00:56:34.980 Good night, good night, y'all, Paul

00:56:36.620 Good night, y'all, Paul

00:56:38.720 Good night, dude, Paul

00:56:40.060 Good night

00:56:41.280 She never opened up

00:56:43.000 Dude, not even the assassination woke her up, bro

00:56:47.800 She's cruising, bro

00:56:50.380 Where did she come from?

00:56:51.760 Maybe she woke up

00:56:54.380 Did the thing. 1.00

00:56:56.640 She's like, oh, fuck. 1.00

00:56:57.740 Damn. 1.00

00:56:58.080 Hold on a second. 1.00

00:56:59.080 Hold on a second.

00:57:00.400 You're asking the right questions.

00:57:02.140 Where did she come from?

00:57:03.260 Where did she go?

00:57:06.080 Industry plant.

00:57:07.400 Cotton Eye Joe.

00:57:10.520 Yo. 0.97

00:57:12.120 It's all starting to make sense.

00:57:14.420 Cotton Eye Joe predicting the fall of our two.

00:57:20.200 Just go to sleep with that blanket.

00:57:24.380 go to sleep brother just wrap up where did you come from where did you go no we'll get we'll get

00:57:30.540 i swear we'll get copyright nina got nina got a thing years ago from for using that song they're

00:57:35.320 actually they're adamant the cotton eye joe's they're at they'll come after you for their

00:57:39.460 copyright how long was that how long was that yeah we get some money five seconds

00:57:50.520 Bro, what is it in your mouth?

00:57:53.760 Is that a zen?

00:57:54.420 Oh, it's a zen.

00:57:55.240 Sorry.

00:57:56.160 Yeah, you do the nicotine patches?

00:57:58.380 I do the nicotine patches.

00:57:59.140 I used to dip a lot.

00:58:00.780 Yeah, you did.

00:58:01.520 I remember your spit bottles.

00:58:03.860 Spit bottles, yeah.

00:58:05.060 All right, so these things are coming.

00:58:07.560 It's pretty much over for us.

00:58:09.340 That's not what I'm saying.

00:58:10.240 Or what?

00:58:10.620 I'm saying this.

00:58:14.200 I believe we're at a point in time where regardless of what you feel about the

00:58:19.940 UAP in the sky

00:58:21.580 Unidentified Anomalous Phenomena

00:58:23.360 We're at a point where we can't ignore it

00:58:26.360 We can't ignore it anymore

00:58:27.300 And you guys are laughing at me

00:58:28.460 You guys are both laughing at me

00:58:30.320 No, because UFO is an unidentified flying object

00:58:34.420 That's an unidentified flying object

00:58:37.380 And they're not all flying 1.00

00:58:38.480 They're trans medium 1.00

00:58:39.580 They're trans aliens 1.00

00:58:42.600 We're at the LA, you GPTQ 1.00

00:58:45.220 Asterix now

00:58:46.580 Hello, I am a boy girl 1.00

00:58:48.120 Like trans alien

00:58:49.760 spectrum multi-organism it's a ufo and aliens no no they're not because they're transmedium

00:58:55.940 multi-domain they're multi-domain they can go underwater they can go underwater at speeds that

00:59:02.260 are possible bro the submersibles the submersible usos unidentified submerged objects the uso

00:59:08.380 the usos the usos that's the government that's the government agent no bro the usos the usos bro

00:59:16.920 no no that's the usa and that's the government bro this is the first time ever where i really

00:59:22.200 do feel like you could be right and everybody could be right because there's just too many

00:59:27.900 insane things going on all at the same time are you talking about in the world yeah no no

00:59:36.600 because because like okay okay not to bring up the movie uh uh uh uh what's the movie i always

00:59:45.380 bring up clearly you don't bring it up what is that movie that i'm thinking of no country for 0.99

00:59:53.160 no the one where sicario you're no where everyone's where everyone becomes stupid oh oh idiocracy 1.00

00:59:57.960 idiocracy i was gonna say stupid dude it's got electrolytes it's got electrolytes yo idiot that 1.00

01:00:03.960 movie is actually happening like trump choosing his cabinet trump as in general whoa whoa whoa 1.00

01:00:10.180 whoa whoa what i'm not saying anything bad but they're cartoon characters the dude the dude

01:00:15.100 kosh the dude that he elected as that have you seen the picture of him yeah but yeah yeah but

01:00:19.040 kosh is gonna push for disclosure that should be number one let me ask you a question or let me

01:00:23.920 ask you a question top five they have they have stated that on day one on day one numerous things

01:00:30.740 first the first thing they're gonna do is uh is uh pardon all of the people who invaded the capital

01:00:37.120 so as soon as that's done really yes that's within the first nine minutes really yeah he's

01:00:42.440 gonna pardon that's that seems great yeah i gotta say that one seems a little crazy so wait so once

01:00:48.500 sorry actually then he's gonna is that just as crazy as biden biden's also crazy no it is biden

01:00:55.720 just pardoned like 1500 people one of which was his son that's also crazy don't i'm not i'm not 0.84

01:01:01.080 pick one side that's one thing i'm not i'm not politics i know i'm a republican but i hate

01:01:06.000 republicans too like i hate both sides they both both sides hold on a second but you believe in

01:01:10.220 abortion hold on a second yeah they are okay no no hold on everybody we're getting off track here

01:01:15.080 i'm both sides i see so it's like when you when you single out one side yeah you gotta let's

01:01:19.560 balance it out we're getting off track we're getting off track here guys i'm not i'm not

01:01:24.920 picking on one side that is the side that's coming into power right now so the conversation 0.99

01:01:29.240 makes sense the biden it hasn't even what else biden hasn't been inside his brain in 12 fucking 0.97

01:01:34.380 years bro okay you want to talk about the other side the other side is cooked i'm not talking 0.98

01:01:38.040 about the or ridiculous i'm just saying i'm saying so after the j6ers get pardoned 0.65

01:01:43.560 and after the most important topic of discussion that trump is handling is the end of daylight 0.97

01:01:52.840 savings time no fucking way no way are you are you serious that's that's huge don't don't more 0.55

01:01:59.820 daylight savings time that's huge i've been waiting for this moment forever we're gonna 0.96

01:02:05.360 have continuous hours and you know you being like me like i'm a dwarf winter i was gonna say our

01:02:12.760 depression you know the talks that we've had oh being a depressed yes being depressed guy yeah

01:02:17.740 a winter is the hardest 100% hardest well guess what now that when trump gets in winter will no

01:02:23.080 longer exist he's he's bringing what's called eternal spring wow and then and so anyways where

01:02:30.640 i was going with this was then the third thing is going to be disclosures now they have promised

01:02:36.860 and this is something that everyone is very much looking forward to very early on who killed jfk

01:02:44.180 who the jfk files are these aliens what who did mk ultra cia and why do they keep putting back on

01:02:57.600 and taking back off the microbe why can't it just also be continuous and who was at epstein island

01:03:02.980 with diddy and they're saying now jay-z but let's see what you love jay-z all because i'm gonna

01:03:08.800 hold out a little hope for you always go allegedly bro allegedly jay he just had a civil lawsuit

01:03:14.120 case anybody anyone can do anyone anyone can do anybody for anything not just what he said not

01:03:19.220 discounting the credibility but that yeah i don't want people to think that is a uh a dagger and

01:03:24.000 you know actually i will i'm filing a suit against you today i actually am going to do this to prove 0.92

01:03:29.220 my point for the time that you sucked my toes while i was sleeping i'll never forget it i might 0.99

01:03:35.980 and that sucked him. 0.99

01:03:36.840 I definitely massaged him. 0.99

01:03:37.300 See, that's in the middle.

01:03:38.940 That's in the middle.

01:03:39.760 I definitely massaged your bunions.

01:03:40.900 That's in the middle.

01:03:41.820 You don't have to massage my bunions.

01:03:43.840 I love massaging your bunions.

01:03:46.060 There was so much worse now.

01:03:47.240 Get him over here, baby.

01:03:50.140 What?

01:03:51.680 Anyways, continue.

01:03:52.840 The question I have to ask is,

01:03:55.280 what if the revealing never happens now?

01:04:03.340 So?

01:04:03.820 because we've always been promised these like reveals so trump won't be the first president

01:04:09.620 that has attempted to get disclosure now one of his missions is also to unwind the deep state which

01:04:15.700 is this legacy program allegedly that is concealing these really important secrets however

01:04:22.760 if it's a matter of national security he's not he's gonna he's gonna he's not gonna completely

01:04:28.940 open the book but perhaps there's an argument that the american people deserve to know that

01:04:36.020 on planet earth there is a higher intelligence here and this is what we know about them who

01:04:42.940 decides national security no no because because here's why it's why should he why should the 0.96

01:04:47.240 government decide national security why shouldn't it be us the fucking people and more so twitter 0.91

01:04:52.180 yeah that's a good point we deserve to see these files yeah it's it's because in a hypothetical 0.90

01:05:01.280 world if they have successfully reverse engineered this technology that's like

01:05:06.380 hundreds thousands of years more advanced than what we're capable of or like believe is possible

01:05:12.140 and it could keep us a world superpower the world superpower you're not gonna want it you don't want

01:05:18.520 you don't want china to know you don't china to know that you have that tech but but i think we're

01:05:24.560 i think we're here man i think we're here and like you know i i opened up a clip today i seen

01:05:28.780 they're talking about the drones and i'm literally like damn this is uh we're on the cusp the sci-fi

01:05:34.340 movie in real life is beginning it's beginning and it's an exciting conversation but why do you 0.82

01:05:40.260 think though

01:05:40.980 that since 1950

01:05:43.940 that this all came about? What was

01:05:46.060 developed in the mid

01:05:48.040 1940s?

01:05:50.160 Nuclear energy. Bingo.

01:05:52.600 Where did the UFOs allegedly

01:05:54.060 first start showing up?

01:05:56.080 Air 51. Nuclear

01:05:57.700 test sites is where they showed up, which is

01:06:00.060 why in 1947

01:06:01.920 I believe. We dropped the bomb in Hiroshima

01:06:04.260 in the 30s. In 1944. No, 1945.

01:06:06.720 40s. So we had uranium

01:06:08.240 before that. No, no, no.

01:06:09.400 no no it was 1944 or 1945 yeah but we had nuclear shit before that but it's like you know if you're 0.87

01:06:17.340 an intelligent species that you know whatever they're doing here it's it's like okay that is 0.96

01:06:22.340 something to take notice these apes have figured out how to destroy themselves and potentially us 0.98

01:06:26.560 as well like like they're not invincible roswell new mexico what if they're dumb roswell new mexico 0.98

01:06:32.020 read the title of this ufos and there's a correlation boys you don't think the the 0.92

01:06:37.520 wonders around the world we don't know why they're there um how did human create this without the

01:06:43.440 technology you don't think in the and in the bible it does speak of alien like yep things yep

01:06:52.040 so have they been around so that that that conversation is valid i don't know enough

01:06:57.420 about to get into like uh the detail religious like potential historical relation to ufos and

01:07:05.280 but it is the natural wonders like how do they do that yeah i mean you know who knows i i don't 0.96

01:07:11.320 love like theorizing shit i'm just talking about shit that we like know or shit that looks like 0.90

01:07:15.320 at least at the moment super probable like roswell new mexico right uh a a uh a balloon 0.98

01:07:23.580 that was attempting to spy on russia was what was shot down and recovered and that was what 0.68

01:07:31.420 was the big secrecy that's what the the air force was all there to collect and it's horseshit like

01:07:38.780 like i think a first starting spot for disclosure truly would be like what actually happened at

01:07:44.280 roswell because allegedly there was a some sort of electromagnetic pulse or a thunderstorm

01:07:50.200 that downed this this alien craft where debris was spread over like football fields worth of

01:07:58.940 this rancher's land and the stuff that they collected was as thin as a piece of foil but

01:08:06.380 you couldn't break it bend it smash it with a sledgehammer it was like it was this it's

01:08:10.520 otherworldly material which we know has been proven to be true our own government has said it

01:08:14.840 we've collected um crafts with otherworldly material not from this earth and so to cover

01:08:23.200 that up in the moment is potentially a matter of national security because if you can figure out

01:08:28.500 how to like utilize this material weaponry whatever man our government would could could

01:08:35.520 really benefit what if it's just what if it's just more of us bro what if it just there's another

01:08:40.460 because because bro i you know you on the alien side is like me on war and warfare and weaponry

01:08:48.220 like i'm really big on weaponry actually i was i was actually studying something from around the

01:08:52.900 time from around manhattan project the other day after they dropped little boy on hiroshima big boy

01:08:59.860 nagasaki there was a third core that they were working on at los alamos which is probably not

01:09:06.180 all that far from the places you're talking about where these sightings were and there was this like

01:09:11.040 24 year old scientist at los alamos he was working on it trying to figure out something about it when

01:09:17.460 it becomes what's called super critical which is when basically a chain reaction happens within it

01:09:24.140 that's going to force the core to explode basically or to start to give out its energy

01:09:31.680 and and the way that they would test that is they would stack these um tungsten i think carbide

01:09:39.160 blocks on the side of it and there was a machine that would tell the person if it was becoming

01:09:44.940 super critical in the room but there was not a second person in the room at the time there was

01:09:49.940 no laws around it and so he was just working on the project by himself and the alarm went off that

01:09:54.440 the thing was going super critical not to explode but it was going to start giving off a tremendous 0.94

01:09:59.440 amount of uh it was going to create fission and he dropped the fucking brick onto the thing and it 0.82

01:10:05.940 and it released it hit him with like a super wave of of uh radiation and he died like what would be 0.92

01:10:12.660 considered the highest pain tolerance death known to man it basically fried his organs from the

01:10:18.820 inside he died over the course like the next 30 days his skin blistered burned holes in his

01:10:22.900 disgusting i watched the whole video on it oh my god then that same core killed a second scientist

01:10:29.120 it's called the demon core you should read about it's in just one core that they ended up melting

01:10:33.300 down and turning more of their things anyways russia not long after we dropped the bombs on 0.81

01:10:41.100 Hiroshima and Nagasaki created a bomb that was like five or 10,000 times the size of the nukes 0.80

01:10:49.060 that we dropped even even bigger than the ones that we've that we use nowadays I can't remember 0.96

01:10:52.460 the exact name of it there was a name for the bomb so as to say you never really know how far

01:11:00.180 ahead or behind other countries are in this world in this landscape I mean you don't even you have

01:11:06.320 no idea how far ahead our own government no no we they generally are about 50 to 70 years ahead 0.99

01:11:15.300 of declassification meaning like dude we're still learning about shit that was done in fucking 0.98

01:11:19.940 vietnam or or at least desert storm yeah it's a great it's a great point you just don't know 0.96

01:11:26.020 aircraft that they had just in the 60s alone the sr 71 are you fucking serious the technology

01:11:31.420 in the 60s and still to this day people can't do it can't copy the sr-71 blackbird is still to this

01:11:40.000 day the fastest manned aircraft ever ever ever there's only one faster it's like a rocket it's

01:11:47.820 not even an aircraft it's like a rocket the sr-71 is it's like capable of achieving like

01:11:52.180 undetectable mock speeds 80 000 foot ceiling 80 000 foot ceiling just cruising do you know why

01:12:01.420 aliens well there's allegedly anti-gravity technology potentially on yeah i've heard about

01:12:08.740 this um but no you're right you're right yeah dude dude we don't we don't we don't know what's

01:12:13.940 going on which is why i said one of the options of what these things could be it could be all three

01:12:18.420 or all four things is uh our our government maybe has has figured something out that that we do not

01:12:25.120 know about um what do they know and even them they're so scared of they don't realize the 0.90

01:12:31.800 fucking technology that they have to know they don't really they realize they realize it's why 0.70

01:12:37.020 it's such a national secret it's it's it's more secret than the deepest secret in the united 0.99

01:12:42.420 states government i think see that's that's that's the thing that like keeps going up that ladder too

01:12:47.860 and this is like kind of off aliens and back to like the government is like like that deep state

01:12:53.760 you were talking about it as much as it's like become almost laughable how much it's like used

01:12:58.360 in media nowadays it certainly is a real thing yeah like it really is a thing going all the way

01:13:03.860 over to the other side of the pond too like like england england had like a whole um period of

01:13:10.640 of testing nerve gas on uh british citizens like they were just dumping nerve gas from planes on

01:13:16.300 the british the mk ultra program happened like we tested acid on businessmen in san francisco and

01:13:22.720 put them behind two-way glass with prostitutes and like observe them on acid for days at a time

01:13:26.900 and then just sent them home to their wives we traded acid for to to heroin addicted prisoners 0.53

01:13:34.000 and we sorry we tested acid on heroin uh addicted prisoners in prisons in san francisco in exchange

01:13:39.740 for heroin hey we'll give you more dope if you test acid for us like the u.s government uk 0.97

01:13:45.060 government are have accomplished extremely fucked up things over the past oh my gosh 0.98

01:13:50.980 the u.s government did with the african-americans back in the day they did syphilis it would give 0.96

01:13:55.840 them syphilis bro so they couldn't uh produce other kids last note on on this bro think about 0.97

01:14:02.320 how we got this country are you fucking serious think about how we ended up sitting in this room 0.99

01:14:08.160 as white people are you like what are we not capable of we took out an entire 0.99

01:14:13.040 indigenous people using bacteria smallpox true yeah like are you fucking kidding me i watched 0.99

01:14:20.060 special on that the other night too with the give a blanket diseased filled blanket insane or like 0.99

01:14:24.920 it's gonna be like yo we're helping you guys out no we're not actually doing it to fucking kill you 0.99

01:14:29.400 on that note kind of like uh respecting another culture or or or people or race um 0.98

01:14:39.060 i'm gonna say something a little maybe like a little foo-foo a little woo but i think it's

01:14:47.000 important i think it's important that we're that i think it's important that when we're having these

01:14:53.600 conversations about what's going on in the skies and and these like entities that we aren't sure

01:14:59.120 what they are yet i think the conversation is treated with respect and i think it's really

01:15:05.080 important that the energy that we have when dealing with these things is like positive

01:15:13.220 and with good intentions what but what makes you think at any moment that

01:15:19.520 our current society would approach them with any less than that 0.99

01:15:25.080 fuck are you fucking kidding me are you kidding me are you actually that is that is the most 1.00

01:15:35.840 but i'm but i'm i'm trying no you can try all you want no have you not gone on twitter yeah 1.00

01:15:42.720 i have a like yeah but i have a platform and if i if i didn't say it i although i fell off 0.94

01:15:48.680 welcome to the club bro let's fucking go we fell off that guy 0.92

01:15:52.860 the bottom ain't so bad you're right say it again sorry um no i think um 0.97

01:16:00.400 i think we got to be really careful with how we're dealing with these

01:16:08.040 ebs i don't want to say ets i don't want to say extraterrestrials i want to i made it up

01:16:14.240 i coined it no no you know what eb stands for ethereal beings which i think may be an accurate 0.96

01:16:21.560 description of what's happening you don't want to say i fucking hate you guys ethereum beings 0.99

01:16:28.280 you guys are you guys are gonna get fucking fried when when you guys get radiation poisoning and 1.00

01:16:36.620 they choose you yeah they're gonna look at me like this dude's already fucked yeah let's go 1.00

01:16:42.260 let's go on another experiment this guy's he's tainted what i would hate it what i would 0.83

01:16:46.620 ethereal beings what i would encourage you to do is watch one of two movies either independence day

01:16:54.700 where the people like i just said are standing on the i know like i know we love you i know i know

01:16:58.860 They just shoot a laser down that just completely evaporates the building.

01:17:07.900 Or watch the movie Mars Attacks, where a very similar thing happens.

01:17:14.600 They're not coming here to respect us.

01:17:17.560 They're not coming here to sample our fare, okay?

01:17:20.520 They're coming here to devour us.

01:17:23.580 They're coming here to eat us, bro, okay? 0.93

01:17:26.260 And also, yeah, they're going to colonize Earth.

01:17:30.820 Bro, bro, bro.

01:17:31.800 It's happening.

01:17:32.480 We've done it.

01:17:33.060 Guys, I think it's why I say EB is I think.

01:17:40.160 That's like an electric car.

01:17:42.180 I just got my new EB.

01:17:43.600 You will always be a liberal, even on other planets. 1.00

01:17:46.760 You're a fucking. 1.00

01:17:48.100 How does that make me a liberal, bro? 1.00

01:17:50.120 Because you're giving them terms.

01:17:51.340 You're giving them PC terms. 1.00

01:17:53.900 Fucking aliens. 1.00

01:17:54.980 No. 1.00

01:17:55.260 if i get my way assholes yeah they're gonna hate you no i tried i tried i tried i tried 0.98

01:18:02.280 if they're if they're real aliens they have a sense of humor if they're that smart if they're 0.98

01:18:07.080 that advanced they have a sense of humor obviously i'm bringing good energy to the table we welcome

01:18:11.420 you welcome to our world look how beautiful it is what a display of affection america is

01:18:17.400 we always were here there was never other people here before us look how we treat our ceos that

01:18:23.000 we have disagreements with we're a great people come join us we'll have a bunch of fun together

01:18:29.160 try some of our local fare it's called mcdonald's immediately upon trying have a problem go to the

01:18:37.380 hospital hope you don't mind waiting 12 to 15 hours in the waiting room for them to give you

01:18:43.080 oxycons which you can then get addicted to welcome to the world of america have fun guys you've all 0.68

01:18:50.180 my eb's watching this welcome yo if i were them bro yeah i might i might destroy us just zap it 0.60

01:18:58.400 now just get it over with no you can't think like that i'm sorry don't think like that no but mike

01:19:03.280 said yeah but mike said they have a sense of humor right uh wrong help us please help us we

01:19:08.620 obviously look at us we don't know what we're doing look at look at our world right now we've

01:19:13.120 done okay for a while but we've clearly lost our way if you're here to help us please and thank you

01:19:18.040 we appreciate you we love jesus some of us why would the drones go to new jersey i think

01:19:25.160 to your point they picked the most problematic places they hovered over a dump in new jersey

01:19:30.780 it's basically ground zero for hell why is the thing that you think they're gonna like you though

01:19:35.160 the aliens because you're gonna talk to them and they're gonna try to talk to you and you're like 0.99

01:19:39.540 yeah that's dope bro you know what you're gonna get on your phone there's a fucking alien in front 0.99

01:19:44.280 you but your ADHD is so bad that you're like yo this is something I've never seen before that's 1.00

01:19:51.640 dope what's next how are my parlays looking and they're like this guy's a fucking ass yeah 1.00

01:19:59.180 do you want to know the way do you want earlier in the episode I talked about the way to get 1.00

01:20:02.800 through to the gods of the friendly skies the gays now I'll tell you how to get through the 0.99

01:20:08.580 aliens this is the this is the one no it's not complimenting the aliens don't like compliments 1.00

01:20:13.040 math what math it's the one universal language you want to talk to these motherfuckers you better 0.99

01:20:22.740 know the pie gathering theory it's not even how you say it theorem you better theorem whatever 0.68

01:20:28.380 you better know you better know how to triangulate you better know how to calculate you better know

01:20:35.360 how to get every square root because they only know one language and that's numbers i i disagree

01:20:41.820 I think we have something else to offer

01:20:43.320 because they defy math.

01:20:47.000 Take the note, by the way.

01:20:48.840 You know what we should offer them?

01:20:51.780 Music.

01:20:54.260 This was in a movie once, too.

01:20:56.080 I think we made music.

01:20:57.900 I think they tried playing a song.

01:20:59.260 Oh, no.

01:20:59.680 It was Mars Attack.

01:21:00.640 They played this song.

01:21:02.060 Their heads explode.

01:21:03.280 That's how they figured out.

01:21:04.100 The greatest technology of all time

01:21:06.720 to be taken down is by one song.

01:21:10.460 and that's I don't even know what it's a yodel

01:21:12.740 baby shark

01:21:13.520 oh my god

01:21:15.340 wait so

01:21:17.840 I just think music is a universal

01:21:20.600 language you know you could

01:21:22.160 recite a song that you heard

01:21:24.580 when you were 10 years old you'd know the lyrics

01:21:26.200 that song that goes

01:21:26.840 what song would you

01:21:32.680 okay so if they got here and say what song would you play for them

01:21:34.900 yep that's a good question

01:21:36.240 what's the one song that will bring in

01:21:40.420 you see that's extra being but but i guess probably at the moment i'd probably play i had

01:21:45.940 some help by post malone we're fucking dead i think i think it's a great song it's a great

01:21:52.500 song but it's just so poppy what if they're like kind of indie aliens or like have some 0.84

01:21:56.560 hipness or it's more instrumental based sugar we're going down swinging yeah i mean it's a good

01:22:02.260 song what if you see i think you're thinking too like what if it's mozart chopin oh but here's my

01:22:09.100 question okay so here's the best we got look at this composition musical composition no that's

01:22:14.540 what it would be that because no that's what it would be so we'll give them best of now 2000s

01:22:19.320 go back in your spaceship his best of nows from the 90s listen to mbop tell me what you think

01:22:26.660 come back to us wait so you guys are gonna get fried to your point i'm good they don't want me

01:22:32.060 i'm tainted i mean i'm tainted too to your point uh of it maybe being music but it would be hard

01:22:38.300 to choose what song to the people who say it would be math then what problem would you present

01:22:43.580 like what would you like what like to say hello what would you do one times three

01:22:48.680 do you know what i'm saying like what is yeah but you're the one who started no no no no no

01:22:53.460 because this is you start yeah what are you doing no you're you're having a dialogue with

01:22:57.800 no entirely yourself that's what's happening right now it's general you created your own

01:23:02.280 prompt and are like struggling to answer it it's like dude figure it out they're gonna speak in 0.75

01:23:08.140 math how are they gonna do that one plus one it's like i don't fucking know you're the one that

01:23:13.680 brought it up because i really believe it's generally believed that mathematics is the

01:23:19.120 universal language that's what i'm trying to say oh it's generally believed that these crafts can't 0.98

01:23:23.140 go 12 000 miles an hour in the air and turn on a dime but guess what it's fucking happening you 0.77

01:23:27.560 know how luigi mangioni yeah dude that dude is really cleaning up in terms of like impressions 0.98

01:23:37.260 impressions what i mean so you could just kill someone you're good because i think there's yeah

01:23:42.280 what is up with that he's not being like he's being praised okay i guess like there's there's 0.53

01:23:47.060 a bunch of factors here right and we're a little late to the party obviously but that's fine this

01:23:51.200 story is going to go on for a minute first and foremost there is a impeccable impeccable video

01:23:58.420 that's that's number one like like whenever there's a story there's a million stories about

01:24:03.720 shootings stories are stories but when you have a video of a this is how the the ceo is walking

01:24:10.260 he was in his suit he literally looked a little bit like a gta npc like he just was

01:24:18.140 strolling down the street and a man came up behind him with a 3d printed gun with a silencer

01:24:26.420 with a silencer on it shot it once it jammed cleared it shot it jammed cleared it shot it

01:24:34.100 assassination on video yeah okay that's that's incredible that's you don't see that very often

01:24:43.680 you hear about use another word yeah you said immaculate and incredible

01:24:48.800 these are like praise you gotta change up your words my mic is coming in and out so i'm struggling

01:24:53.300 a little bit um we we could probably buy new money well we have no money because we haven't

01:24:58.540 made any money on the show we had a we have an ad this this um show oh so okay so geek so that

01:25:04.720 should be several grand we subtract the 52 000 and travel for the episode we're still in that

01:25:09.420 okay okay cool um videos number one number two he goes on this manhunt right and and there's all

01:25:18.640 this lore there's been so much lore the words on the bullets yeah the monopoly money in the back

01:25:23.840 mcdonald's like if you think about it there's so much americana attached to this this assassination

01:25:29.040 why so he's he's yeah he's anti like health care anti-health care okay then but then why

01:25:34.800 was he at mcdonald's because it's anti-healthcare but mcdonald's is not very healthy yeah i think 0.99

01:25:41.360 he's anti-health now i don't know maybe he's fucking hungry you could you could love hell 0.99

01:25:48.640 bro listen let me ask you a question you know what he was eating a hash brown i don't care if 0.99

01:25:53.680 you're fucking arnold schwarzenegger dude you're gonna eat mcdonald's hash browns are the best 0.97

01:25:57.780 thing in the world yeah and you know if you're going to prison and the one thing is going through 1.00

01:26:01.620 your mind what's the one meal that i could go back to and it makes me happy maybe it's that

01:26:06.000 mcdonald's hash brown with a mcgriddles yeah mcgriddles as well i would shred sausage egg

01:26:10.480 and cheese mcgriddle so listen so this dude so this dude does all this stuff he gets caught he

01:26:15.760 ends up being handsome just absolutely stunning stunning incredible six-pack yeah let all the

01:26:23.140 all the stewardesses that i don't compliment enough that never give me my food or it's smitten 0.86

01:26:28.780 yeah smitten airline gods okay at this mangione dude they're like damn i want to touch his

01:26:36.300 mangione dude right like dude this dude is just fabulous that's the word i don't use that word

01:26:41.840 often but he's fantastic okay and and then and then the conversation begins and he gets he gets

01:26:49.220 cherished he gets praise for this action i didn't really get it to be honest i didn't really get the

01:26:56.040 praise because here's the thing i don't think you can just murder someone no i can't i don't think

01:27:00.720 that's the i think that's the problem one thing weird i gotta i got out of it it's like yeah i

01:27:04.680 get i i he's done bad whatever he's turned down a lot of people he may technically kill people

01:27:10.880 that's their eyes if he's since he's denied he has murder on his hand you gotta say allegedly

01:27:16.080 allegedly allegedly sorry allegedly um you're good you're good go on no you're good no you're

01:27:22.340 covered legally covered legally covered legally we have you know insurance so i am so like that's

01:27:28.720 where they think it's okay to kill him but it but like in my mind it's like whoa he still murdered

01:27:33.640 someone so wow such an such an interesting conversation because like you know if he does

01:27:40.480 have like blood on his hands the ceo allegedly yeah well how many lives would make it okay

01:27:48.500 like i don't know i don't know is killing always justifiable he's he's he the the ceo

01:27:56.760 didn't kill anybody right the ceo didn't kill anybody he he he probably reinforced

01:28:08.660 already existing policies that made getting medicine to fix already existing diseases

01:28:19.120 that were already killing people harder to get so so uh he killed as many people as the ceo of

01:28:29.740 mcdonald's as the ceo of hershey as allegedly as allegedly as this as the ceo of x y and z biz 0.98

01:28:39.620 i'm gonna be honest there's a death there's a death count behind every fucking brand behind 0.67

01:28:44.980 every brand i don't care which brand not prime or lunchly and that i agree with both very well 0.93

01:28:52.820 incredible stand-up products in fact if someone were to open one of the boxes of lunchly and

01:28:57.660 place it into my left hand or right hand right now i would eat it while doing this conversation

01:29:02.900 they're so far yeah yeah so i can't i can't sorry bro i'm so hungry so so you're gonna have to get

01:29:14.420 it done so there was that that praise i think lasted for like two days and if you go on now 0.99

01:29:22.060 like the the the it's completely different bro no one no one is fucking stupid enough to root 0.98

01:29:28.180 do you want to know what changed now give them this there is now a conversation about 0.99

01:29:33.080 premiums there's a conversation about it's happening right so so in that respect like

01:29:38.620 we're talking but guess what do you think united healthcare is gonna say wow 0.78

01:29:46.980 that was pretty fucked up of us maybe maybe we should abandon some of this profit help some of 0.62

01:29:56.340 these people or do you think they're just going to take a ceo of another competitive brand plug 0.99

01:30:03.080 that motherfucker right back into that position and go back to business as usual and does it load 0.99

01:30:08.160 up on security yeah sure that's it sure the only thing that changes is now the ceo's baby girls 1.00

01:30:16.960 grow up without a father wife grows up you know ages without a husband luigi mangione 1.00

01:30:24.580 gets mangione in the asshole for the rest of his fucking days on this planet 1.00

01:30:29.880 and twitter changes the subject two days from now when elon farts at the border yeah you know 1.00

01:30:38.100 what i'm saying like nothing fucking changes bro you didn't you didn't you didn't rock the system 0.99

01:30:43.020 you didn't do shit yeah you just became the meme for 2024 and now you're in prison forever yeah so 0.99

01:30:49.720 like so like dude there's a lot of shit in this world that we hate that we that we can't stand a 0.99

01:30:57.300 lot of policy that we don't agree with but but this should be a lesson that like you you're not 0.90

01:31:03.520 gonna earn it through blood dude it's just it don't work like that anymore used to there was a

01:31:07.800 time back when there was 2200 people in a village and there was one bad medicine man and you could

01:31:14.420 stab them then maybe it would fix something it's just things are too changed things have changed

01:31:20.100 too much now well said mike well do you agree with that that last part there yeah no i think

01:31:25.280 no that's what i was gonna like is it just is it ever justifiable is it i think what mike said

01:31:29.780 to change anything yeah that that that's why it seems like a little bit of a futile mission and 0.98

01:31:33.760 and incredibly short-sighted as fuck, 0.99

01:31:37.720 which is crazy for an Ivy League student. 0.99

01:31:39.740 It did open up insurance's eyes, though,

01:31:43.380 because there's one insurance,

01:31:44.660 I can't remember the name.

01:31:45.700 I saw it.

01:31:45.880 They were about to pass a policy.

01:31:48.860 I think it was insulin-related.

01:31:50.560 No, no, anesthesia-related.

01:31:52.260 Anesthesia, yeah.

01:31:52.960 They weren't going to do anesthesia after two hours.

01:31:55.460 Like, after the two-hour mark in the surgery,

01:31:57.060 you have to pay for anesthesia for the rest of yourself,

01:31:59.260 which is what surgery is less than two hours.

01:32:01.780 yeah probably like the mouth yeah the surgery and then they abandoned that change and yeah as

01:32:07.500 soon as the dude got shot they're like so okay so maybe there maybe there is change so i saw that

01:32:12.560 i saw that and i was like is there is there also a chance that that policy was just gonna get shot

01:32:18.660 down anyways shot down nope that was policy crazy you said that that's crazy your use of words

01:32:26.020 What an incredible shooting

01:32:28.220 That's gonna be shot down

01:32:31.340 Okay listen guys

01:32:32.880 That's it we're done

01:32:33.880 Yeah this is a long episode eh

01:32:35.140 Okay so end of the Jay-Z assault stuff

01:32:37.500 No no no

01:32:38.300 Ev thanks for joining us dude

01:32:41.600 Sophie Rain made 43

01:32:43.040 Fun hangs

01:32:45.080 Fun hangs so far

01:32:47.340 Yesterday

01:32:48.300 We watched the meteor shower

01:32:50.960 Was it a good shower

01:32:54.080 Great shower

01:32:55.120 if we would have stayed longer

01:32:57.860 it would have been crazy

01:32:58.900 it was just

01:32:59.600 what was the name of it

01:33:02.480 Gibeon

01:33:04.740 wait Gibeon

01:33:06.220 wait Gibeon

01:33:08.620 that's a Gibeon meteorite

01:33:10.520 wait a second maybe the aliens are

01:33:12.760 dude they're here for the meteor

01:33:15.700 you have what the aliens are 1.00

01:33:18.300 I think Bad Bahabi 1.00

01:33:19.660 I don't think so

01:33:21.620 that meteorite right there

01:33:23.840 is older than the earth

01:33:25.100 Right there.

01:33:25.600 4.5 billion years old.

01:33:27.000 Hold on a second.

01:33:28.060 Allegedly.

01:33:29.160 No, no.

01:33:29.980 Who told you that, Ryan Garcia?

01:33:31.000 No.

01:33:31.640 Grab the plaque.

01:33:33.800 Grab, go hurry.

01:33:34.660 If you could grab the plaque right back there.

01:33:37.080 I'll be like, how do you know that?

01:33:38.480 I got a plaque.

01:33:39.440 You put you in the plaque.

01:33:40.600 Grab it.

01:33:40.980 So I have a plaque that says I'm 6'3".

01:33:42.560 Am I 6'3"?

01:33:43.320 Toss it.

01:33:43.640 It's like Tommy Boy when the guarantee's on the side of the box. 0.99

01:33:46.000 Yeah, if I put a shit on the box, it says guaranteed on it. 0.97

01:33:48.680 Is it still guaranteed? 0.99

01:33:49.780 Read it.

01:33:50.880 But it doesn't say guaranteed on the box.

01:33:53.160 Read it.

01:33:53.520 Go ahead.

01:33:54.140 I'll hold it.

01:33:54.520 gibbon meteorite an exceptional and massive specimen who gave it that object that's subjective

01:34:00.840 no an exceptional and massive specimen sotheby's.com 4.5 billion years boom who was even

01:34:08.900 there to say that it was there at the time sotheby's sotheby's was not they weren't even

01:34:14.340 invented till maybe a couple hundred million years after that we're out of here thank you 1.00

01:34:20.840 guys are listening to this episode of impulsive it's bullshit it's fucking bullshit joe we love 1.00

01:34:25.800 you guys this was fun chopping it up with the boys this felt like a last thing this felt like 1.00

01:34:29.920 actually like the first old school boys home yeah in a while in a while like the ones where we

01:34:34.760 actually used to go have fun and talk yeah oh wow cool this was a good episode guys we love you uh

01:34:40.480 we'll see you next time take it easy peace your body is always giving you signals whoop helps you

01:34:46.160 understand them whoop is the wearable health and fitness coach that provides personalized

01:34:50.720 insights into your sleep recovery strain and overall health to help you make better decisions

01:34:56.380 every day whether you're training working traveling or just trying to feel your best

01:35:01.080 whoop shows you what helps your performance and what might be holding you back listen to your body

01:35:06.200 build better habits see where whoop can take you try whoop free for 30 days at whoop.com

01:35:13.300 Lisa, tell them about our new show.

01:35:15.940 We have a new podcast.

01:35:17.280 It's called Don't Lie to Me.

01:35:18.700 I'm Lexi Iwanu.

01:35:19.820 We're two best friends, 22 years apart, but so close at heart.

01:35:23.980 And I'm Lisa DiGiulio, the old one,

01:35:26.160 which means we have wildly different references,

01:35:28.380 occasionally different opinions.

01:35:29.720 And at this point in my 50s, I've lived it all.

01:35:32.540 Now in my 30s, being the founder of New Shoes,

01:35:35.500 Good Taste is my business.

01:35:37.680 Listen on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts,

01:35:40.580 or wherever you get your podcasts.

01:35:42.960 I'm Lacey Mosley, author, actor, stand-up comedian, creator,

01:35:47.860 and host of Scam Goddess Podcast.

01:35:50.160 The true crime comedy podcast, all about robbery, fraud,

01:35:53.360 and those who practice it.

01:35:54.560 Each week I bring on an amazing guest.

01:35:56.440 Ooh, I scammed them.

01:35:57.640 What?

01:35:58.100 I could talk to you for an hour.

01:35:59.620 You're a generational yapper, like me.

01:36:01.640 That's why I had to make yapping a job.

01:36:03.400 And now you can catch full episodes of my show on YouTube.

01:36:06.920 Start listening to Scam Goddess on the iHeartRadio app,

01:36:09.880 Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

01:36:12.260 Hi, this is Kylie Brakeman, Angela Jaritana, Jeremy Culhane, Patrick McDonald, and we're

01:36:19.240 the hosts of the Artists on Artists on Artists on Artists podcast, the Improvised Character

01:36:23.660 Comedy podcast, where each week a new panel of artists discuss their craft.

01:36:28.560 Join us for a panel of Eurovision participants.

01:36:31.640 And we do a little Halloween sometimes.

01:36:33.860 Does the Pope dress up?

01:36:35.180 He winks on Halloween.

01:36:37.460 He gets right up next to the microphone.

01:36:38.720 I hear you can almost hear the eyelashes hit each other.

01:36:42.260 You've never seen Italy so quiet as when the Pope gets up to wink on Halloween.

01:36:47.620 Listen to Artists on Artists on Artists on Artists every Thursday on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

Impaulsive with Logan Paul - December 19, 2024

DWARF MAMBA RETURNS! Life After Leaving Logan Paul, Working A 9-5 Job, Hawk Tuah Crypto Scandal

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