Impaulsive with Logan Paul - E307 Never Sleep With Her On The First Date

00:00:00.160 Breaking story from Alpine News Network.

00:00:03.160 Sandra and Kabir are celebrating 50 years of marriage

00:00:05.920 by turning their boring bedroom into a spicy one.

00:00:09.400 Oh, my.

00:00:11.040 Alpine Credits sent a super-strength hero

00:00:13.140 to help with a home renovation loan.

00:00:15.620 New floors, windows, a heart-shaped button

00:00:17.740 that plays this tune.

00:00:21.160 Okay, I think that's quite enough.

00:00:23.280 Own your home, need a loan?

00:00:24.840 Alpine Credits can help.

00:00:26.860 Alpine Credits, where homeowners get approved.

00:00:30.480 Lisa, tell them about our new show.

00:00:33.060 We have a new podcast.

00:00:34.480 It's called Don't Lie to Me.

00:00:35.860 I'm Lexi Iwanu.

00:00:37.020 We're two best friends, 22 years apart, but so close at heart.

00:00:40.960 And I'm Lisa DiGiulio, the old one,

00:00:43.160 which means we have wildly different references,

00:00:45.600 occasionally different opinions.

00:00:47.020 And at this point in my 50s, I've lived it all.

00:00:49.840 Now in my 30s, being the founder of New Shoes,

00:00:52.720 Good Taste is my business.

00:00:54.920 Listen on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts,

00:00:57.800 or wherever you get your podcasts.

00:01:00.000 i'm hamza and i'm martin and we're the hosts of out of character the best podcast in the world

00:01:06.340 is that what they said wait they said that yeah yeah they said that the best podcast with two

00:01:11.100 best friends who jabber and talk about topical trendy funny stuff give our input on it that's

00:01:16.580 what you've needed i think up until now listener listen out of character on the iheart radio app

00:01:21.260 apple podcast or wherever you get your podcast sometimes i just feel like a burden you're a bird

00:01:26.340 You fly.

00:01:27.200 You're Martin.

00:01:27.860 And we are Out of Character Podcast.

00:01:30.060 Dude, you messed up the clip.

00:01:31.880 Hi, this is Kylie Brakeman.

00:01:33.500 Angela Jaritana.

00:01:34.440 Jeremy Culhane.

00:01:35.140 Patrick McDonald.

00:01:36.080 And we're the hosts of the Artists on Artists on Artists on Artists Podcast.

00:01:39.880 The Improvised Character Comedy Podcast, where each week a new panel of artists discuss their craft.

00:01:45.660 Join us for a panel of Eurovision participants.

00:01:48.760 And we do a little Halloween sometimes.

00:01:51.040 Does the Pope dress up?

00:01:52.400 He winks on Halloween.

00:01:54.640 He gets right up next to the microphone.

00:01:55.900 I hear you can almost hear the eyelashes hit each other.

00:01:59.500 You've never seen Italy so quiet as when the Pope gets up to wink on Halloween.

00:02:04.820 Listen to Artists on Artists on Artists on Artists every Thursday on the iHeartRadio app,

00:02:09.300 Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

00:02:12.280 I only mean ****.

00:02:13.900 You know, like if someone were to give me a ****, I wouldn't find that problematic. 0.99

00:02:25.900 first of all shut up mike shut up mike shut up listen i'm gonna tell you something are we 0.99

00:02:35.120 rolling first off yeah 100 welcome back to impulsive welcome back to what my impulsive 0.99

00:02:41.240 the number one podcast in the world thank you the mic you're a podcast host you need the mic mic

00:02:47.500 what the so welcome back we're a show uh subscribe to our show it's not so bad

00:02:55.440 I have to tell you this 0.72

00:02:56.980 You butchered the therapist

00:02:59.980 Thing in the Posner episode

00:03:02.140 I felt like

00:03:02.800 I did, I did

00:03:04.220 I'm going to cut it from that episode

00:03:06.000 If you want to fit it in here

00:03:08.000 And give it another shot, no pressure

00:03:09.480 I didn't think I butchered it

00:03:11.740 I think I didn't tell it as good as I should have

00:03:14.040 Or how it went down and I'll tell you why

00:03:15.660 I mean that's kind of what butchering looks like

00:03:17.420 He was diving into this spiritual realm

00:03:19.660 And I didn't want him to think I was making fun of him

00:03:22.340 So I was trying to

00:03:23.460 Listen, I don't care

00:03:24.140 I don't care.

00:03:25.760 You know, I said what I said, but it's Mike Posner.

00:03:29.760 Well, we're here.

00:03:30.840 In Puerto Rico, the boys are back in town.

00:03:32.680 Well, hey, I need you to finish one of your sentences. 0.99

00:03:36.060 What the fuck is going on right now? 0.99

00:03:37.640 What's happening? 0.99

00:03:39.980 What's up with the snaps you're doing lately?

00:03:41.780 Yo, can we start this episode off properly with some news?

00:03:45.220 All right.

00:03:45.980 You may have already seen on other YouTube channels potentially,

00:03:48.480 because I'm sure we've been talking about it.

00:03:49.680 But I want to take a quick second to acknowledge the fact that George is now a sharing member of the Impulsive team.

00:03:59.660 He's an officially a part owner of Impulsive.

00:04:02.060 Welcome.

00:04:02.680 Welcome, George.

00:04:03.480 I appreciate that, man.

00:04:04.660 I felt like I worked really hard this year to be a part of it.

00:04:07.900 I wanted to ask at a good time.

00:04:10.920 And I felt like I did a lot of work because this obviously was a rock star show before me.

00:04:15.360 And it obviously will be after me.

00:04:17.320 And it's done a lot for my career, my life.

00:04:20.180 What do you mean after you?

00:04:21.660 You're leaving, George?

00:04:22.220 Yeah, because if you leave, you know your equity stake is zero.

00:04:25.260 I didn't want anybody to think because of this, it was like, oh, now he feels like he's greater than everybody.

00:04:30.880 I think they were thinking that.

00:04:32.200 Well, I feel that way.

00:04:33.400 I just don't tend to show it.

00:04:34.880 Well, I'll tell you why they might think something like that, George, because it's been approximately 12 hours since you picked up your ownership stake.

00:04:41.980 And you made a request this morning, pretty early in the morning, by the way, to change your seat, man.

00:04:48.200 First of all, it's been over a year.

00:04:50.540 Never asked for anything.

00:04:51.780 And the first thing I asked for was just, you know, I want to sit here.

00:04:54.940 But why this morning?

00:04:55.960 I'll tell you why.

00:04:56.500 It just didn't seem like much of an ask.

00:04:57.840 Well, now as a shareholder, I feel like, you know, like, there's a lot of things that are going to be switching around here.

00:05:03.660 First of all, we're getting rid of Kevin, all right?

00:05:05.840 Kevin, Kevin can't be here anymore.

00:05:08.060 Milton, I don't want to see him.

00:05:09.500 He's not even here. 1.00

00:05:10.260 He records shit. 1.00

00:05:11.140 It ends up on the internet. 1.00

00:05:12.280 I don't even want it. 0.99

00:05:13.460 He's a walking racist man. 0.99

00:05:15.900 Whoa. 0.99

00:05:16.980 I'm joking.

00:05:18.200 I was obviously pointing at David.

00:05:21.500 Is this in Jortziv already?

00:05:23.620 Can we start the episode like this?

00:05:25.280 I love this.

00:05:26.360 So David, I just learned this.

00:05:29.100 Leaves scathing one-star Yelp reviews in full sincerity.

00:05:34.400 There's so much.

00:05:35.420 There's so much.

00:05:36.220 Give her a review on this podcast.

00:05:37.760 Yeah, you're going to.

00:05:38.620 There's so much that is.

00:05:39.440 And once again, David's sitting back down, the German videographer.

00:05:42.040 There's so much that people don't know about this guy. 0.63

00:05:43.900 He's an enigmatic psychopath lunatic that will get his own episode at some point. 0.93

00:05:52.240 But for today, it's another David's Terrible German Yelp Reviews session. 0.98

00:05:58.100 Another one? 0.92

00:05:58.620 Is this the first time though?

00:06:00.440 Yeah, this is the first one. 0.97

00:06:01.620 So you fucked that up. 0.86

00:06:02.440 This is why I'm a shareholder now, guys. 1.00

00:06:03.800 I have to put this shit together. 1.00

00:06:05.320 He's losing his mind. 1.00

00:06:06.280 He's on drugs all the time.

00:06:07.440 And that guy just got off of drugs.

00:06:09.340 Stop perpetuating this whole opiate narrative.

00:06:11.860 We need to stop. 0.65

00:06:12.460 This is horrible.

00:06:13.040 You are on hard crack, oh my God.

00:06:15.440 Because Mike needs another book.

00:06:17.140 It's get your friend to the vital.

00:06:18.840 The sixth vital.

00:06:20.520 Get him to the vital. 1.00

00:06:23.100 Your dick grew a little bit and I don't like it. 1.00

00:06:24.900 I don't like it either. 1.00

00:06:25.740 My dick did too. 0.99

00:06:26.880 It's just the confidence. 1.00

00:06:28.140 Wait, what's going on with this guy?

00:06:30.000 It didn't even make sense.

00:06:30.800 You know what?

00:06:31.240 I swear to God this is true though.

00:06:32.740 You know I grew one inch from stretching?

00:06:37.240 I swear to God.

00:06:38.340 And I will go up against a tape measure.

00:06:40.020 You can look at my ID.

00:06:41.480 You can look at my ID.

00:06:42.420 conversation i would love i would love for this to be recorded george no you're fired

00:06:47.300 can't fire a shareholder i will walk away with my percentage good day you clearly have not seen

00:06:54.280 the contract because trust me it don't look like that hey you know it's funny right after they like

00:06:59.780 they welcomed me onto the team they immediately started talking about massive changes and i was

00:07:03.880 like can we shake on this before we uh well because now like all the money we make the expenses come

00:07:10.460 right off the top.

00:07:11.420 Yeah.

00:07:11.760 You know,

00:07:12.020 and sometimes when you move

00:07:12.940 to Puerto Rico

00:07:13.540 and build an entirely new set.

00:07:14.960 Budget cuts.

00:07:15.820 I got them.

00:07:17.520 George,

00:07:18.060 I've become the accountant. 1.00

00:07:19.180 What the fuck? 1.00

00:07:19.840 Why does Mike need 1.00

00:07:20.640 two left socks?

00:07:22.100 Why does he need

00:07:22.540 two left socks?

00:07:23.380 Wait,

00:07:23.560 how did you know that?

00:07:25.400 They're supposed to have

00:07:26.200 the logo on both sides.

00:07:27.540 How did you know that?

00:07:28.740 Well,

00:07:28.900 Mike,

00:07:29.180 as a shareholder.

00:07:30.480 All right,

00:07:30.740 David,

00:07:31.000 with your Yelp review,

00:07:32.080 what happened?

00:07:32.760 First of all, 0.99

00:07:33.100 this seating sucks. 0.99

00:07:34.260 Thank you. 0.98

00:07:35.160 Listen.

00:07:35.800 Thank you.

00:07:36.540 No,

00:07:36.760 no,

00:07:36.920 no,

00:07:37.240 no,

00:07:37.520 no,

00:07:37.720 no,

00:07:37.820 as a guest.

00:07:38.040 You know what?

00:07:40.460 No, no, no, no, no, no, no, sorry, he wasn't on your side.

00:07:42.920 Yeah, he's on our side.

00:07:44.180 I was actually saying, now I have three people sitting here, so now the pressure on me, I

00:07:48.660 feel like it's a little bit more...

00:07:49.780 Got it, so George, you're canceled.

00:07:51.520 Like, look at all these guys. 0.99

00:07:52.280 Did he pay you to fucking say that? 0.99

00:07:54.540 No, it's because we're used... 0.99

00:07:55.880 Can we take a vote in the comment section?

00:07:57.760 Uh, no.

00:07:58.580 All right.

00:07:58.860 I'm putting this in the episode that's not this episode that you're watching, obviously.

00:08:03.440 I still look like a homeless guy in Florida.

00:08:05.620 I'm a Florida man. 1.00

00:08:06.600 Holy fuck. 1.00

00:08:07.720 Yeah, we got an announcement with KSI coming January 3rd. 1.00

00:08:10.180 pay the fuck attention pay the fuck attention pay that fucking attention david listen to me 1.00

00:08:15.820 listen to mike tell me why you leave one star yelp reviews after caleb yep oh see that's fine 1.00

00:08:23.660 david the broken mic why i do that yeah dave i mean you i do it for the people bro what do you

00:08:32.500 what do you know i get it i get it for the people so when you walk into an establishment you know

00:08:36.940 what's going on why would you i mean you can leave a positive review i guess but you know

00:08:41.880 imagine that imagine that dave no one leaves a negative review well you do if i have a negative

00:08:48.920 experience i'll make sure i share it so someone else can avoid the same that actually makes sense

00:08:53.940 which is why i found this interesting because he read these reviews to me and they're i'm this is

00:08:58.040 in full bring one out bring it bring me one out they're in full sincerity which one do you want

00:09:02.180 first the cook the cookie one seemed pretty deliberate all right welcome back to david's

00:09:09.180 negative yelp review welcome back where where have we done this before why do we keep circling

00:09:14.880 back to something that's never existed welcome to the first negative yelp review with david

00:09:20.860 by the way you did one too in colorado i did you got fired up you were mad i did you were sitting 0.56

00:09:27.880 down the first thing you were doing you're like i'm a writer this this place sucks they treated 0.58

00:09:32.180 me unfair they didn't didn't even acknowledge me what's what's the next best thing if you can't do 0.71

00:09:37.340 assault a one-star review on yelp yes it's destructive and i won't do assault too much

00:09:43.060 to lose no it's illegal carry on all right cool should i give him a backstory if you don't read

00:09:47.960 that no backstory matters all right so mike and i had a first of all it was cook international

00:09:54.360 cookies day on the 4th of december i believe mike and i mike and i had a wholesome day

00:10:00.200 in santa monica i was filming b-roll i was like i'm gonna do a tiktok my friend and i

00:10:06.260 got a cookie on national cookie day so i filmed all the b-roll blah blah and so we found the

00:10:13.020 best place and then we went there around oh no actually that doesn't matter i think he's

00:10:19.740 I think he's breaking down, Mike.

00:10:20.640 You're doing good.

00:10:22.060 He's cracking me.

00:10:22.960 I think he's breaking down.

00:10:24.380 Focus right here. 1.00

00:10:25.160 Look at my ass. 1.00

00:10:25.560 He's cracking. 1.00

00:10:26.620 Hey, hey, hey. 1.00

00:10:26.980 Don't let him fuck with you. 1.00

00:10:28.280 They do this. 1.00

00:10:29.140 Don't do not. 0.99

00:10:30.040 Because of George's shitty city? 0.99

00:10:31.600 Yes. 1.00

00:10:32.260 He's just.

00:10:33.720 Wait, switch with me. 0.99

00:10:34.880 Only a man gets into that seat.

00:10:36.260 Switch back, switch back. 1.00

00:10:37.580 Go get it. 1.00

00:10:40.080 Big dicks around here. 0.99

00:10:41.560 I want David crack. 1.00

00:10:42.380 I want David crack.

00:10:43.760 Look right here.

00:10:44.220 Way better.

00:10:44.880 I like this.

00:10:45.520 Now George is out of my way.

00:10:46.940 We really paid him to do all this. 0.90

00:10:48.380 there's no fucking way there's no way the day that we talk about this 1.00

00:10:52.860 all right here it is padaria bakehouse one star yep fluent reader all of a sudden fuck you 0.99

00:10:59.080 so i was planning a creative i fucked it up so i was planning on creating a wholesome cookie 0.98

00:11:05.940 review tiktok with my friend mike he's a burger expert in honor of national cookie day so after

00:11:11.220 hours of filming b-roll in various locations of santa monica i set aside just enough time

00:11:16.460 to make it to around 5 20 approximately 40 minutes before closing time to my absolute horror when we

00:11:24.820 pulled up to padaria it was pitch black inside at first i thought it was a night theme but to my

00:11:31.120 dismay they had close early on the most important holiday of the cookie calendar needless to say my

00:11:38.980 tiktok was ruined as was my life we'll be going to diddy reese instead thanks yeah you don't need

00:11:46.340 to give the guy yeah so that was that there's a shout out at the end but he he doesn't know how

00:11:50.400 to fucking end things properly we're working on he's new to the creative space he david also so 0.90

00:11:56.320 cookie cookie day was ruined completely trashed we went to diddy reese as well there was a line 0.99

00:12:00.800 around the corner it was an hour-long line he tried to it was not shut your fuck it was not 0.99

00:12:05.100 I swear to God, it was a long 1.00

00:12:07.140 ass line. I'm not doing this shit with you. 1.00

00:12:09.380 He wants to cover up. 0.99

00:12:10.940 Anyways, anyways.

00:12:12.600 Who cares how long the line was? Listen to me, stop.

00:12:14.920 It's a cookie thing. Move on to

00:12:16.460 you also had an experience with a

00:12:18.920 Canadian. What just happened?

00:12:20.920 You also wanted to move into

00:12:22.800 a Canadian. 0.97

00:12:24.600 You wanted to send flowers to a Canadian with a Canadian

00:12:26.900 flower shop. Wait, why don't we leave that for the next one?

00:12:28.340 I hate this seat so much, bro.

00:12:30.080 No, I think you should do both.

00:12:31.720 Yeah, read the other one, too.

00:12:35.960 Mike's covering something.

00:12:38.480 Covering what?

00:12:40.020 So the line actually was 20 minutes.

00:12:42.460 Maybe 20 minutes long, right?

00:12:44.500 Are you okay with that, Mike?

00:12:45.320 I was going to meet a girl, yeah.

00:12:46.500 But I'm not trying to talk about it. 1.00

00:12:47.920 So go on to the fucking Canadian shit. 1.00

00:12:50.120 Should I do the other one as well? 1.00

00:12:51.740 Yes, read the fucking Canadian shit. 1.00

00:12:54.200 How do you know? 1.00

00:12:55.160 Talk to our guest a little bit with more respect.

00:12:57.680 Bro, the dude is a...

00:12:59.260 Wow.

00:12:59.760 What is he, Mike?

00:13:00.380 What am I, Mike?

00:13:02.200 You know, maybe we should switch seats, George. 0.99

00:13:05.100 why don't you fucking see 0.96

00:13:07.200 I actually want to see what that seat's like 0.99

00:13:09.200 wait what is this

00:13:11.680 oh come on

00:13:14.200 I like that

00:13:15.280 that's great 0.97

00:13:16.620 this is ridiculous 0.98

00:13:18.320 oh my god 0.98

00:13:19.060 do you understand the vibe of our show

00:13:23.160 is now that of just like 1.00

00:13:24.560 a bunch of fucking idiots 1.00

00:13:26.700 talking about nothing 1.00

00:13:28.180 for 70 minutes straight

00:13:30.140 alright so

00:13:31.200 here's a second negative

00:13:33.480 Yelp review with David.

00:13:35.580 This time at a Canadian flower shop.

00:13:41.160 One star.

00:13:42.660 Do not waste your money.

00:13:44.040 No, make sure you deliver that properly.

00:13:46.120 Yes.

00:13:46.560 All caps.

00:13:47.460 Please, Mike, make me feel comfortable.

00:13:48.660 Stop.

00:13:49.260 Get your hand off my shoulder right now. 1.00

00:13:51.240 Do not waste my fucking money. 1.00

00:13:54.640 Paid extra for morning delivery. 1.00

00:13:56.200 One hour late.

00:13:57.440 Received an email that it was delivered.

00:13:59.460 It wasn't and ruined the whole surprise.

00:14:01.540 the flowers didn't look like

00:14:03.120 advertised on the website

00:14:04.880 promised a mason jar

00:14:06.720 but it came in a generic jar 0.91

00:14:09.400 with a freaking handle 0.87

00:14:10.900 can you believe that 0.97

00:14:12.700 did you write that

00:14:14.660 read it how it's written

00:14:17.540 maybe you should read it 0.99

00:14:18.960 maybe we shouldn't have had the German guy read English

00:14:20.980 yeah correct 1.00

00:14:21.600 that's fucked up 0.97

00:14:23.120 I'm sorry you're feeling this way 1.00

00:14:26.340 stop sexually harassing our guests

00:14:29.460 he hasn't been speaking English 0.70

00:14:31.320 recently. He has the best

00:14:32.400 George, can you switch sheets with David?

00:14:35.120 God, please. 1.00

00:14:36.140 What the fuck, dude? I can't handle this shit. 1.00

00:14:38.920 Go back in your seat. 1.00

00:14:42.560 This is a musical fucking chair. 1.00

00:14:44.640 It's kind of fucking moved. 1.00

00:14:46.300 What the fuck is this? 1.00

00:14:48.520 By the way, fuck you 1.00

00:14:50.960 for complaining. I love it here. 1.00

00:14:53.200 Shit there. This was not good, 1.00

00:14:55.000 this little experiment, because now I'm like, this is sick.

00:14:57.120 The seat's great. Cool, cool, cool, cool, cool.

00:14:59.360 Sit there. You a rapper?

00:15:01.320 Do not waste your money.

00:15:03.680 There's bullet points.

00:15:05.120 Paid extra for morning delivery one hour late.

00:15:07.920 Received an email that it was delivered.

00:15:09.500 It wasn't and ruined the whole surprise.

00:15:11.960 That's the worst, actually.

00:15:13.360 The flowers didn't look like they're on the website. 0.77

00:15:15.520 Promised a mason jar, but it came in a generic jar with a freaking handle.

00:15:19.420 And terabang and terabang and terabang and terabang and terabang and there's an exclamation point next to a question mark.

00:15:25.020 So this is a series of them.

00:15:26.820 Nothing about this was a positive experience.

00:15:28.640 And on top of that, they're pushy on their retargeting.

00:15:34.060 We'll call you and email you to make sure you complete the purchase.

00:15:37.940 I wish they would put that energy from their pushy behavior towards making their customers happy.

00:15:42.900 Nothing but dry apologies.

00:15:47.240 Give me my money back.

00:15:48.600 Would you prefer a wet apology?

00:15:50.740 Like what?

00:15:51.920 No, it's like I complain and I'm like, oh, I'm sorry.

00:15:54.800 Next time we'll do better.

00:15:55.820 They're called empty apologies.

00:15:57.120 is dry apologies

00:15:59.160 what is a wet apology

00:16:02.020 that begs the question

00:16:04.180 I'm flaring

00:16:05.380 I think this is a classic case of like

00:16:09.000 a smoke flaring

00:16:09.880 sir I accept it because it's wet

00:16:13.000 I think

00:16:13.700 I think the reason I'm saying that is because

00:16:16.700 it's a classic case of translating

00:16:18.980 one by one

00:16:20.600 from German to English

00:16:22.360 because we would say

00:16:23.540 dry apology

00:16:25.540 You can just ask him about overtly anything

00:16:27.480 He'll answer any question you ask him

00:16:29.580 Dave, Dave, Dave

00:16:30.460 What is 0.99

00:16:31.060 Wait, wait, wait, what the fuck 0.99

00:16:34.800 What did I just hear 1.00

00:16:35.880 Just get him off

00:16:37.180 Thanks for coming on the show

00:16:41.020 We appreciate you

00:16:42.280 Yeah 0.99

00:16:43.440 This motherfucking bro 0.99

00:16:51.820 He's really holding it down dude 0.99

00:16:53.960 We interrupt this podcast to bring you a program.

00:16:56.480 This episode is sponsored by Extra.

00:16:58.440 Extra is the first debit card that lets you build your credit and earn reward points,

00:17:01.960 just like a credit card with no credit checks, no interest, and no need to switch banks to sign up.

00:17:05.960 Here's how it works.

00:17:07.180 Users connect Extra to their existing bank account.

00:17:09.940 Extra spots them for everyday purchases.

00:17:12.260 Users auto-pay Extra the next business day.

00:17:14.760 And at the end of the month, all payments are tallied up and reported to credit bureaus.

00:17:18.480 Users can also redeem points for every purchase they make.

00:17:22.140 So sign up for extra with the link in my bio

00:17:24.060 And start building your credit with a debit card

00:17:25.960 Yes a debit card

00:17:27.840 Thank you back to the podcast

00:17:29.760 You know who I really want on if we're gonna do

00:17:32.080 Can we have a read on 0.99

00:17:32.800 George what the fuck is your problem 0.99

00:17:35.200 Yeah I don't think you can make those kind of requests 1.00

00:17:36.900 I feel like yo hey would you be willing to go back

00:17:39.560 To the drawing table on the equity chair

00:17:41.320 Well hold on

00:17:42.380 I'll sit back in that seat what do I gotta do

00:17:44.800 What's wet oh it's a ridge

00:17:46.480 It's actually an apology

00:17:47.740 A wet apology

00:17:50.660 um i look around this room right now not at the people out there the two of you guys

00:17:55.920 oh two people who back in early 2021 had started the year with 0.89

00:18:02.640 smooth faces nice hair muscular builds and i see two two bags of trash like that would be my 0.99

00:18:14.940 how i'd describe you guys right now jesus christ two piles of steaming shit with clothes on 0.99

00:18:21.600 and i and by the way i'm speaking for myself as well and the reason i bring this up is how 0.99

00:18:26.980 could there be two three piles of burning shit this year has aged us boys badly badly 0.72

00:18:36.780 bro if if right now caleb who's working the camera could insert a picture of what the beginning of 0.97

00:18:42.680 2021 us looked like that would make this point very understandable boys we are dying in real time

00:18:50.560 we are shriveling up like old dry sponges in the view of public what has happened i went from

00:18:59.960 well he's 36 but he could get 28 all day to god dang get him a wheelchair this kid's toast he's

00:19:05.660 on what happened 1.00

00:19:07.300 you have fucking 1.00

00:19:09.540 crows it's not even crow's feet it's a 1.00

00:19:11.360 flock of seagulls feet

00:19:12.940 what am I

00:19:15.160 I don't know

00:19:16.180 you know it's hard getting

00:19:19.300 older

00:19:20.360 I mean god

00:19:22.960 what's going on even I mean I got goosebumps bro 0.99

00:19:25.380 fuck 0.99

00:19:26.200 I mean what's the response to this 1.00

00:19:29.580 you're just telling me a piece of shit 1.00

00:19:31.560 I'm like yeah have you ever seen that 1.00

00:19:33.460 one movie that by M. Night Shyamalan

00:19:35.500 it's called like the beach

00:19:37.360 and these families went on a vacation to the beach

00:19:39.920 and they started aging way too rapidly

00:19:41.880 they went from like 2 years old to like 60

00:19:44.000 in 2 hours 1.00

00:19:44.940 did you see the fucking trailer for this shit 1.00

00:19:47.580 that's what I feel like is happening to us 1.00

00:19:49.720 we're dying dude

00:19:50.840 I didn't know why

00:19:51.560 why

00:19:53.800 I was asking you

00:19:55.080 I think I know why

00:19:57.040 for me I don't know about you

00:19:58.660 I stopped doing those years ago

00:20:02.420 I know but they say it haunts you in the future

00:20:04.720 you know those movies you see in the third grade and they're like don't do this because you'll end

00:20:07.700 up like that they're fucking right oh yeah so guys if you if you ever abuse uh either crack

00:20:12.280 or heroin at one point in your life your speed your aging will speed up dramatically for no reason 0.98

00:20:16.720 it's gotta fucked up no but here's why i believe uh uh lack of sleep proper sleep sleep schedule 0.98

00:20:27.640 lack of routine workout facial care diet what the fuck do we think it is dude i know what 0.99

00:20:34.780 besides those things because we really need help and potentially a trip to the botox spa 0.62

00:20:39.220 yeah i know what mine was and my mind seriously i i literally put fitness

00:20:44.900 and like health in the last place last year you into fitness what

00:20:49.480 well here's the thing well just answer no i honestly i i'll answer the question my i'm in

00:21:03.300 a happy place mike and when i'm happy i eat no no it's not what i asked george i said are you 0.99

00:21:08.180 into fitness uh i am now i wasn't into yeah yeah fitness dick in your mouth 0.99

00:21:15.100 that is why you're choking up and crying 0.99

00:21:18.940 that is why you've been

00:21:20.860 that's the joke you've been

00:21:22.760 bottling up 1.00

00:21:23.400 hey man shut up 0.98

00:21:26.260 there's no way your foot's making that much noise 0.99

00:21:32.900 zoom in taste 0.99

00:21:34.220 wow what the fuck 1.00

00:21:36.360 you have a prosthetic leg 1.00

00:21:37.960 yes makes sense

00:21:40.300 no I let my

00:21:42.020 health go

00:21:43.480 uh covid you know honestly it made me really cozy and i have a great relationship i had a great

00:21:48.960 last year i was on the show i got to do stand-up i was traveling a lot more i was really happy i 0.92

00:21:53.600 was excited to eat and then i got fat i slipped into this i don't know how but it's fucked up 0.65

00:21:57.580 because i'm not kidding when i shaved my beard i cried and you guys made jokes but i cried later 0.96

00:22:01.600 it sucked you actually cried yeah bro it's it's really bad like i understand now what it feels 0.98

00:22:07.740 like to not love your body i never understood that feeling i fucking love just one more time 0.99

00:22:11.840 really good. You cried when you shaved your 0.99

00:22:13.860 beard. I have a clip of it. I actually

00:22:15.740 cried when I shaved my beard. I went home early that day.

00:22:18.000 Yeah, I sent them home.

00:22:19.580 It's probably a wise move, Reed.

00:22:22.240 I sent them home. I shaved

00:22:23.920 my beard. I started crying. He's like, you good? I go,

00:22:25.880 you're good for the rest of the day.

00:22:27.760 He's like, yeah, I know. I went

00:22:29.700 straight to the gym and sat in the sauna for an hour

00:22:31.920 because I kept convincing myself

00:22:33.580 that it was waterway.

00:22:35.560 I was like, it was all in my beard. I gotta get it out.

00:22:37.620 And then I got out and I thought I was even more fat 0.99

00:22:39.820 and I was like, what the fuck? 0.99

00:22:40.840 we're being you know facetious because it is you know hearing is a little ridiculous but also 0.99

00:22:47.300 i feel you body uh dysmorphia and anything relating to your image of yourself and how you

00:22:52.380 perceive what you look like and seeing what you look like and having that moment can be

00:22:55.860 a little bit of a jarring i actually i i had this conversation with you yesterday i like it now

00:23:01.640 because i think one day god willing when i'm in that point in my life where i could really mentor

00:23:06.340 people because i believe in a lot of mentors i have a lot of mentors in my life but one day when

00:23:09.480 i become one and i and i really want to shape people's lives there was one part of my life i've

00:23:14.060 never really understood that point of view and it's really hard to help somebody get out of it

00:23:17.260 if you've never been in it so now now i understand what it looks like to seriously shower with the

00:23:22.440 lights off because you just don't want to look at the let yourself into reflection right now

00:23:25.700 wow i'm it was it was to that point i'm actually i'm actually i actually love this yeah i think

00:23:30.880 this is cool this is cool because i i can also relate to what you said is it is very hard to

00:23:36.820 relate to something that you see or maybe hear about until it happens to you and you have that

00:23:40.720 feeling and that changes everything it is it and it sneaks up on you to just like dude self-confidence

00:23:47.140 is the best thing in life i think it's a cheat code i've always had self-confidence but if you

00:23:51.260 remove that from a man if you're not confident in the person you are dude you are selling yourself 0.99

00:23:56.880 at every point if you don't believe in the product that you're putting into this world you're fucked 0.99

00:24:00.620 yeah so i truly learned from a really really like vivid vivid point of view if you don't believe in 0.99

00:24:06.960 yourself everything in life gets harder everything in life gets harder you don't even want to make 0.99

00:24:10.840 love to your partner because you're like fuck dude like i don't want her or him to see me in 1.00

00:24:14.640 this light right now let me fix myself and it fucks you up and you start like hating yourself 1.00

00:24:19.240 a little bit more i literally had to like kind of doctor myself and realize like okay like why am i 0.89

00:24:24.720 going through this what's the reason and how do i get out of it quick and i mentally prepare myself

00:24:29.080 I was like, all right, I think God put me in this situation

00:24:31.380 to really understand somebody's point of view

00:24:33.740 when they're like, yo, I don't have the confidence.

00:24:35.260 Because to be honest, by myself,

00:24:37.860 without discussing that with people,

00:24:39.160 when people said that to me, 1.00

00:24:40.280 I'm like, this guy's a fucking pussy, bro. 1.00

00:24:41.660 Like, stop. 1.00

00:24:42.320 Stop feeling bad for yourself.

00:24:43.760 Like, get over it, fix it.

00:24:45.280 But when you don't believe in yourself,

00:24:47.120 because dude, I had the whole world not believing in me.

00:24:48.980 Like, literally, I got moved out of my school.

00:24:51.220 My cousins didn't believe in me.

00:24:52.140 My friends didn't believe in me.

00:24:52.840 But all it took was for me to believe in myself.

00:24:56.640 But if you don't have yourself believing in yourself, 0.99

00:24:58.400 you're fucked it's it's done every mission you set forth on it's done because you're just gonna 0.99

00:25:03.520 get in your head i think it comes back to like to like self-love too it's like it's like a mix of 1.00

00:25:08.440 do you try to attain more confidence in yourself through being the best physical and mental person

00:25:15.640 that you can be or do you get comfortable with the idea of loving yourself no matter what you're

00:25:21.060 looking like that day what you're feeling like that day because that confidence and how you

00:25:25.720 portray yourself in the public eye and to other people, I think is just a result of how you feel

00:25:30.240 about yourself at the time. It's like self-image, self-worth directly translates into self-confidence

00:25:35.840 outwardly. I absolutely, 100% agree with you. Somebody asked me to go, why is it that your

00:25:43.340 philosophical views are from the Bible? What makes the Bible stand out to you? And I said,

00:25:48.120 because the teaching is love. And I feel like once you figure out love, if you love yourself,

00:25:52.360 you could love others but if you hate yourself you're only gonna hate others if you can't if 0.58

00:25:57.280 you can't show love to yourself bro there's no fucking chance you're gonna show love to other 0.72

00:26:00.660 people well that's why well that's what i mean we learned we all i think it was a big learning 0.96

00:26:04.140 year for me and i i'm sure you can relate to it a little bit george logan probably already knew

00:26:07.540 this but like all the all the mean people negative people trolls all the people out there now like 0.95

00:26:12.880 i used to get so hung up in that shit and it took so long to realize that it's just a reflection of 0.98

00:26:18.420 how they're feeling you know it really is it really is like yo you hate you you're saying 1.00

00:26:22.320 that because you hate your life of course saying that because you have nothing that you have nothing

00:26:25.240 good going for you and you want to make other people feel how you feel about yourself and that's

00:26:30.100 why i get so i'm trying to figure out the perfect way to word this in the media but when they're 0.92

00:26:35.460 like yo we need to get rid of bullies and i know it sounds really fucked up but if they saw the way 0.74

00:26:40.240 i have a video of bro like when i was on stage they were throwing shoes at me in my high school 0.96

00:26:44.460 i have a video that i could get my mom to play they did that to george bush too you know that

00:26:48.160 I think it's all Georges. How many shoes, George?

00:26:50.420 One. But I say shoes

00:26:52.080 because it's so much cooler than a shoe.

00:26:54.700 Yeah, one shoe is one thing.

00:26:56.200 They threw multiple things. I just say shoes.

00:26:58.900 One person threw a shoe.

00:27:00.180 One shoe. Can you imagine when

00:27:02.160 he described it originally? I thought he'd every day shown up

00:27:04.260 New Balances, Nikes, Reeboks.

00:27:06.300 It's almost like someone had a merch launcher

00:27:08.060 and was just shooting rapid fire

00:27:10.140 and somebody's screaming, no automatic

00:27:11.980 in the building! And they're just fucking 1.00

00:27:13.820 shooting fucking shoes, dude. 1.00

00:27:16.320 Out of fucking cannons, bro. Probably not the 1.00

00:27:18.140 and comparison.

00:27:20.680 I get it though.

00:27:22.400 It's a meme.

00:27:23.540 It's a meme.

00:27:24.320 Like, no automatic.

00:27:25.480 It's like...

00:27:27.040 But anyways,

00:27:27.780 my theory behind it is

00:27:28.880 I learned that

00:27:30.280 other people's voices

00:27:31.800 is nonsense. 0.96

00:27:32.700 It's honestly fugazi, 0.97

00:27:34.220 fugazi.

00:27:34.460 It doesn't make sense. 0.97

00:27:35.600 It doesn't exist to you

00:27:36.960 because it's their point of view.

00:27:38.680 And I was at a young age

00:27:40.280 when I used to get bullied

00:27:40.980 and my mom just told me

00:27:42.260 one thing that changed

00:27:42.920 my perspective forever.

00:27:44.600 When I came back,

00:27:45.380 it was the third grade.

00:27:46.200 All my friends stopped

00:27:47.140 being friends with me. 0.99

00:27:48.140 And all my new friends are like, you're too old and ugly to be our new friend. 0.98

00:27:51.420 So I had no friends. 0.97

00:27:52.440 So I had to literally eat lunch in the bathroom.

00:27:54.480 I'm sorry. 0.99

00:27:55.300 You're too old and ugly to be our friend? 0.98

00:27:57.740 Yeah, because when I was a kid, I looked older because I had a mustache. 0.98

00:28:00.040 So when I got held back, I looked like I was in middle school.

00:28:02.500 You told me you had a mustache at like six, right?

00:28:04.480 Bro, no, I had pictures.

00:28:05.460 My mom nared my mustache because I was too young to shave. 1.00

00:28:08.620 This is a true story. 1.00

00:28:09.540 She nared me. 0.68

00:28:10.240 She nared me. 0.99

00:28:11.400 You have a mustache as a baby. 0.98

00:28:12.660 I had a peach fuzz, but a lot of peach fuzz.

00:28:14.860 Like a mustache.

00:28:16.260 When did you start shaving your arms?

00:28:18.140 uh fifth or sixth grade what would happen if you didn't shave them would you look like like uh

00:28:22.700 but by the way that all started because i wanted to fit in because they yeah i mean nobody wants

00:28:27.620 to have chewbacca arms yes that's not a valid answer to what i just said i don't know how to

00:28:35.780 answer it so i just said yes i i believe mike may have offended another marginalized group

00:28:41.000 The people with

00:28:42.460 Hairy Chewbacca type arms

00:28:45.280 You can now join the Facebook group 0.99

00:28:47.900 Called Marginalized Groups

00:28:49.660 That Mike's pissed off 0.99

00:28:50.480 There's so many

00:28:51.160 People have been gotten to half by elevators 0.99

00:28:54.840 People with arms as legs

00:28:57.740 People with arms as legs 1.00

00:28:59.520 Women with no vaginas 1.00

00:29:03.220 He has had correspondence with one 0.99

00:29:07.640 Who was unhappy

00:29:08.720 With his joker

00:29:11.000 about her lack of 1.00

00:29:12.900 vagina. 1.00

00:29:15.220 And now 1.00

00:29:16.220 Chewbacca women 1.00

00:29:18.840 are added to that list. 1.00

00:29:21.000 No people, Chewbacca arms.

00:29:22.740 Chewbacca arms people are added

00:29:24.780 to that list.

00:29:26.440 If someone's watching this,

00:29:28.200 all in caps,

00:29:31.520 he leaves them

00:29:32.200 the German reads of review.

00:29:37.460 If someone's

00:29:39.440 watching this episode,

00:29:40.460 I would assume you are

00:29:42.180 if you're here

00:29:42.640 if you're both watching

00:29:54.780 and listening to this episode

00:29:56.740 I can hear my voice right now

00:29:58.880 heed my call

00:29:59.980 please produce a list of these

00:30:02.800 marginalized groups I know someone has

00:30:04.880 it post it on twitter 0.99

00:30:06.640 tag me I'll fucking retweet it 0.95

00:30:08.800 We don't have this podcast to bring you a word from our sponsor. 0.97

00:30:11.500 By now, you've probably seen about a thousand gift guides for the holiday season.

00:30:14.460 Gifts for moms, gifts for dads, gifts for your neighbor's cousin's dog.

00:30:17.780 You can study all those gift guides and shop at 10 different places,

00:30:20.260 or you can start shopping at Raycon and get a gift.

00:30:22.900 Everyone will use Raycon wireless earbuds.

00:30:25.740 They'll give you amazing audio quality wherever you go,

00:30:28.000 whether you use them to pump up, wind down, work, or work out.

00:30:30.900 They're useful for anyone on your list.

00:30:32.920 And even better for you, they start at half the price of other premium audio brands.

00:30:36.440 with your latest model you get three new sound profiles to make sure everything sounds amazing

00:30:41.080 with just the right amount of bass with free shipping and returns gifting is easier than ever

00:30:45.740 the holidays are here now is the time to knock out that gift list and avoid the last minute

00:30:49.900 shipping scramble especially because right now my listeners will get 15 off sitewide with code

00:30:54.880 holiday at buyraycon.com slash logan buyraycon.com slash logan back to the podcast is it true that

00:31:01.420 our dads are the last men on the planet or are we jaded that's what i want that's what i'm here 0.94

00:31:07.180 to ask i love this topic i think we're all pussies compared to 100 we were having a conversation in 0.98

00:31:11.700 the other day car ride we were all talking and we were talking about how our dads you know 0.97

00:31:15.540 built houses from the foundation up my dad renovator uh mortgage guy painter a clean gutters

00:31:24.200 man's man your your pops what could do a house house foundation poor found poor the foundation

00:31:29.580 use the auger auger to dig the post holes for the back deck put the deck in fix put the roof on 0.98

00:31:36.340 studs walling insulation don't get the insulation on you kid it'll itch you for fucking weeks 0.94

00:31:41.880 oh dude like bro Jesus bro my dad my dad told me if you can't fix a pair of brakes by the time 1.00

00:31:50.640 you're 30 on a car you're a pussy yeah I'm 36 I ain't never fix no fucking brakes I actually 1.00

00:31:57.720 know that the day my dad literally was like oh this kid he's fucked he's he's done uh he was 1.00

00:32:03.900 hanging up a wall i'm hanging up a wall he's hanging up a tv he was hanging up a wall right 0.94

00:32:09.180 it was a beautiful wall this looks about right so he's in a rush and i kept pressing him because 0.96

00:32:17.220 the poor guy was i had to leave for the airport and i was like please just fucking hang up the 0.97

00:32:20.280 wall i can't even hang up a picture i was like there's no way i'm gonna hang up a fucking tv 0.97

00:32:23.540 let alone a wall yeah so i still i'm sorry why are you talking about the wall it's called the 0.96

00:32:29.000 callback you just continue you can't call back something that just happened a second

00:32:32.440 well it's in the past it's a callback it's like a present back a call present it's a backpack

00:32:39.320 so he's putting up the tv and um they they wouldn't how they built my house is they they

00:32:47.220 actually they're not supposed to put water pipes next to the entertainment section but they did

00:32:51.660 my dad burst a pipe

00:32:53.900 and he

00:32:55.180 dude what I mean

00:32:56.560 this pipe

00:32:57.060 it was the fire one

00:32:58.400 and this thing came out

00:33:00.260 like

00:33:00.800 on

00:33:01.440 like the whole house

00:33:02.580 is already this much water

00:33:03.480 it was coming out 0.92

00:33:04.200 so fucking fast 0.91

00:33:05.620 I thought we had to move out 1.00

00:33:07.020 I was like oh this is fucked 0.99

00:33:07.820 my house is done 1.00

00:33:08.480 he's like

00:33:09.400 George I'm holding the water

00:33:10.480 go turn off the water

00:33:12.080 I sprint down 1.00

00:33:13.600 my stupid ass 1.00

00:33:15.620 under 1.00

00:33:15.880 I'm

00:33:16.320 oh my god I gotta do this

00:33:17.500 for my father right

00:33:18.260 flick open

00:33:19.580 I'm hitting all the switches

00:33:20.900 My dad goes, what are you doing?

00:33:23.060 Come on. 1.00

00:33:23.600 I'm fucking hitting. 0.99

00:33:24.620 I hit the water one. 0.99

00:33:25.660 I hit the water one.

00:33:25.900 Yeah, you're on the breaker board.

00:33:27.160 I'm at the breaker board.

00:33:28.120 My dad comes down. 1.00

00:33:30.820 You fucking idiot. 1.00

00:33:32.560 Why you buy the electricity? 1.00

00:33:34.740 Go to the fucking water. 1.00

00:33:36.620 And so he goes and he turns off the water. 1.00

00:33:38.380 And this wet Middle Eastern man is sitting there in melted cologne smell. 1.00

00:33:44.000 And I'm like, oh, my God. 1.00

00:33:45.220 I'm so sorry. 1.00

00:33:46.000 He goes, what the fuck are you doing? 0.99

00:33:48.760 Buy the electricity. 1.00

00:33:49.660 he goes go to the water 1.00

00:33:51.000 he goes what the fuck are you doing 0.99

00:33:52.620 and I go dad I've never done this 0.99

00:33:54.180 I've never turned off water in a house before

00:33:56.060 he goes electricity 1.00

00:33:57.620 water you're a fucking idiot 1.00

00:34:00.280 and he got on the plane and left me 1.00

00:34:02.580 with a fucking hole 1.00

00:34:04.000 with all this water 1.00

00:34:05.740 he was so mad

00:34:06.680 he's like how did I raise a son that doesn't know

00:34:09.280 electricity and water are separate things

00:34:11.820 and he left

00:34:12.900 it's really funny because

00:34:15.080 I've had many moments like this

00:34:18.280 where my dad was like 1.00

00:34:19.260 where where the fuck did i go wrong with you how are you i asked you for a fucking phillips head 1.00

00:34:26.860 screwdriver and you brought me a wrench are you a fucking moron like the amount of times i was in 1.00

00:34:33.440 that exact situation but another thing that i realized uh through that story was dads who 0.99

00:34:39.560 thought or were able to do pretty much everything also were uh susceptible to mistakes in their

00:34:47.340 process of doing too much and my dad although he could do everything he also was very sure he could

00:34:53.320 be an electrician and one day we were all eating dinner and my dad was on the back patio i'll never

00:34:59.660 forget this he was working on the uh the little uh outlets the outdoor outlets i think he's putting

00:35:04.680 a new outdoor outlet in yeah and i think he had like a a slight second of uh uh forgetfulness 0.90

00:35:10.320 that you can't put a metal screwdriver into a fucking electric socket and there was a sonic 0.97

00:35:15.600 boom dude 0.99

00:35:16.700 we are at dinner

00:35:19.820 dog and there is a 0.61

00:35:21.440 Hiroshima happened in the backyard 1.00

00:35:23.520 there was a sonic fucking boom 0.98

00:35:25.700 it was like 0.99

00:35:27.280 an atomic warhead dropped

00:35:29.520 on the back deck and my father shot back

00:35:31.600 about 15 feet

00:35:32.500 was he okay

00:35:33.920 you know how dad's

00:35:36.080 you know how dad's char

00:35:39.040 when they get shocked by electricity

00:35:41.660 he kind of looked like that

00:35:43.280 you know how when you order your dad medium rare and it goes back black and blue no but like you 0.97

00:35:50.140 know how dad's like there's two things they don't want to admit ever one is that they've fucked up 0.99

00:35:54.840 on a home improvement project like they just don't take that fucker to the grave dude and 0.98

00:35:59.640 number two and this is the biggest is that something that they've done to themselves has 0.99

00:36:03.860 actually hurt them they went bro dad your arm is hanging off your body dude he's like 1.00

00:36:13.000 eat your fucking supper 1.00

00:36:14.700 eat your fucking supper 1.00

00:36:16.440 let me get a fucking band-aid 1.00

00:36:18.380 eat your supper 1.00

00:36:19.100 you know what I'm saying

00:36:20.260 I wonder if this is so like

00:36:22.960 really just specifically relatable

00:36:25.300 to a very certain subset of dad

00:36:28.000 known as

00:36:29.820 your papa and mine

00:36:31.440 because I don't know

00:36:32.440 my dad yelled at me

00:36:33.960 in two different languages

00:36:34.840 and he bounced back

00:36:36.300 from English to Assyrian

00:36:37.500 in Middle East 1.00

00:36:38.460 you stupid 1.00

00:36:39.200 who the fuck you 1.00

00:36:41.940 And I'm like, what the fuck is it? 1.00

00:36:43.880 I'm like trying to figure out the translation here. 0.99

00:36:45.900 I was like, I don't know, man.

00:36:47.480 At one time he said he called me Brunit Ikhre. 0.99

00:36:50.020 And in English, that means son of shit. 0.99

00:36:52.500 And I swear to God, I swear to God, I was a little kid and I said it out loud because I was trying to like fucking break it down. 1.00

00:36:58.680 He's like, motherfucker, why do these teachers already call you Brunit Ikhre? 1.00

00:37:02.740 And I go, son of shit, you're shit. 1.00

00:37:04.820 And I looked at him and he goes, what? 1.00

00:37:06.800 I go, no, no, you say.

00:37:08.500 He goes, no, no, what you say.

00:37:10.580 And I blacked out.

00:37:11.520 That was one of my blackout moments.

00:37:13.700 So this is what I'm talking about.

00:37:15.160 Because, you know, our pops ruled with an iron fist.

00:37:18.040 And I also have to beg the question, are we in a bubble?

00:37:21.040 There's still dads out there like this.

00:37:22.880 A hundred percent.

00:37:23.280 A thousand percent. 1.00

00:37:23.840 Like, we're fucking, we're bubbled. 0.99

00:37:25.560 My dad's even still doing this stuff. 0.99

00:37:28.320 But, you know, we aren't like that.

00:37:30.480 Our kids in our generation like that.

00:37:32.220 And if so, I want to meet you.

00:37:33.840 I want to meet you.

00:37:34.460 These are the, this is like, this is, these people build from the ground up.

00:37:39.300 They're the foundation.

00:37:40.220 They're our fathers.

00:37:41.100 Yeah.

00:37:41.260 They made us, their fathers made them

00:37:42.760 And as, I mean, fathers and mothers

00:37:45.200 It is what it is

00:37:46.240 I wonder if their fathers were like

00:37:48.880 Instead of building like a brake

00:37:50.740 They're like, if you can't build a car at the age of 30 1.00

00:37:53.100 You're an idiot 1.00

00:37:53.500 Bro, you 1.00

00:37:56.120 I'm sure if your dad was anything like my dad 1.00

00:37:59.060 You know exactly how your fucking grandfather ruled 1.00

00:38:01.820 You definitely 1.00

00:38:02.920 Bro, are you finding my best way at a baby?

00:38:05.020 Dude, dude, dude, listen to this

00:38:06.280 None of us here are strangers 1.00

00:38:09.080 To getting our fucking asses 1.00

00:38:11.200 beaten by 1.00

00:38:13.260 both of our parents, probably. Now, our mothers

00:38:15.320 probably, I'll assume for you guys as well, had a

00:38:17.340 weapon of choice. That's why the moms use weapons. 1.00

00:38:19.540 Mine was a massive wooden spoon. 1.00

00:38:21.560 Same. She said, I will get the fucking wooden 0.99

00:38:23.260 spoon. And if we didn't listen to that, the worst thing 1.00

00:38:25.300 you could ever hear is, or I will get

00:38:27.200 your father. Mine was mental warfare.

00:38:29.640 Oh, she would just call you like a piece of shit, 1.00

00:38:31.260 you hairy Chewbacca-armed little fuck. She would make me guess 1.00

00:38:33.120 what the fuck's happening. Hey, what do you think's 0.99

00:38:35.140 happening, George? She's like doing weird 0.91

00:38:37.080 She's like, pick your car than any car, George.

00:38:42.800 Is this your car, George? 0.96

00:38:45.100 My mom was the worst.

00:38:47.520 She made me say what was going on.

00:38:53.500 Who's wheezing?

00:38:54.800 Who's wheezing? 1.00

00:38:57.080 She set up domino rallies with rocket ships. 1.00

00:39:01.480 George, just explain this.

00:39:04.760 Right now.

00:39:05.580 This domino right now.

00:39:07.080 I'm using statistics and probabilities.

00:39:10.000 It's like six.

00:39:16.840 She's like, I wanted to answer in exponential format.

00:39:21.500 Has your parents ever got frustrated helping you with homework and then get mad at you? 1.00

00:39:27.180 Why are you so stupid in school, Mal? 1.00

00:39:29.040 Did you just call me? 1.00

00:39:29.840 Well, help me out then. 1.00

00:39:31.120 What the fuck is this? 0.99

00:39:32.220 Wait, hold on. 1.00

00:39:32.980 Listen, listen.

00:39:33.800 and what happens is it's it's like a trickle-off effect every let me explain it every generation 0.98

00:39:43.480 gets a little bit more pussy than the one before it wow okay so true so like dude they used to 0.97

00:39:51.600 stone people my my no literally so listen my dad's dad stone i know you guys love that one 0.99

00:39:59.180 It was a wee joke.

00:39:59.880 Yeah, we joke. 0.82

00:40:00.720 My dad's dad was from Hungary. 1.00

00:40:04.260 Hey, is that why you're always hungry? 1.00

00:40:05.900 Shh.

00:40:06.940 Let him talk for just...

00:40:07.800 I'm sorry.

00:40:08.380 You know, on that note,

00:40:09.380 I think Hungary is right next to Turkey.

00:40:11.580 So the...

00:40:11.900 Nice.

00:40:13.140 Just forget it.

00:40:14.020 Listen to me. 1.00

00:40:14.760 Fuck. 1.00

00:40:15.500 Okay, we're getting off track. 1.00

00:40:16.620 Listen.

00:40:18.040 My dad's dad was from Hungary

00:40:20.120 and his name was Zoltan.

00:40:22.940 My father's dad's name 0.99

00:40:25.680 was fucking Zoltan. 1.00

00:40:27.900 Damn. 1.00

00:40:28.760 Would you imagine ever talking back to this motherfucker? 1.00

00:40:32.080 Ever? 1.00

00:40:32.920 His name was Zoltan. 1.00

00:40:34.540 He's a fucking Greek god or some shit. 1.00

00:40:37.580 I mean. 1.00

00:40:38.080 Just in bed, say my name.

00:40:39.460 Zoltan.

00:40:43.800 Was that Mike saying his name?

00:40:45.140 Yeah, why?

00:40:45.680 No, his grandfather in bed, say my name.

00:40:47.960 To who, though?

00:40:48.840 His wife.

00:40:49.720 I'm talking about him and my dad at this point.

00:40:51.460 Seems like a weird time to make that joke, George.

00:40:54.000 It's a perfect time to make that joke.

00:40:55.040 I mean, it's a weird show.

00:40:56.380 Okay, so listen.

00:40:57.240 My dad would always tell me

00:40:59.480 After he was done

00:41:01.420 You know

00:41:01.860 My dad was big on the backhand

00:41:04.140 Oh cool

00:41:05.660 Dinner table

00:41:07.000 Whenever

00:41:07.380 Especially

00:41:08.300 My father's least favorite thing

00:41:10.080 That could ever happen

00:41:10.860 I'll get back to Zoltan in a second

00:41:12.780 Was that when he comes in the door from work 1.00

00:41:14.780 He trips over your fucking shoes 1.00

00:41:20.800 At the door 1.00

00:41:21.240 Oh

00:41:21.700 My dad had a few of these

00:41:23.840 Dude

00:41:24.160 This was the thing 1.00

00:41:26.680 if he walked in and your shoes were in front of that fucking door and because think about it 0.99

00:41:31.760 my dad used to drive two hours from connecticut to rhode island to his marketing fucking job in 1.00

00:41:37.160 traffic both fucking ways to come home and eat dinner with his ungrateful shit kids 1.00

00:41:43.100 and the first thing that welcomed him to the door right after hearing my mother's shrieking 1.00

00:41:50.780 voice screaming out michael was him tripping over a pair of size 70 nikes because i was already had

00:41:58.600 huge paddle feet to form mashed potato toes at that age and he would walk in and stumble and trip 0.99

00:42:04.620 and drop his briefcase with his stupid paperwork everywhere like think put yourself in his mindset 0.99

00:42:10.820 like are you not gonna immediately start cocking that fist back to just lay down the law on these 1.00

00:42:17.840 kids shit kids 0.99

00:42:19.460 now everyone's working from home 1.00

00:42:22.000 so you ain't got no shoes to come back

00:42:23.720 to trip over correct shoes are done

00:42:25.800 now my dad's thing was

00:42:27.140 his room

00:42:29.860 was right above the door

00:42:31.380 they would go in and out to leave the house

00:42:33.240 so the door sometimes

00:42:35.720 we would let it just close and they would

00:42:37.700 and the wall

00:42:39.660 was it loud it was

00:42:41.680 light it was like that in the garage like

00:42:43.400 my pops was serious about his naps

00:42:45.900 do not interrupt

00:42:47.620 his 45 yeah this is the guy who's what are you doing dad he's like rest of my eyes and you do

00:42:54.080 it still to this day which is it you collect you call it i collect the yeah i'm i'm finding the 0.99

00:42:59.020 older i get the more and more i'm like my dad it's actually it's fucked people dude it's insane 0.99

00:43:03.000 what are you gonna do you know what you are like your pop fuck i mean he's you know he's great 0.99

00:43:07.660 and he's good looking he's he's aged like a fine wine and i'm uh i'm actually i joke around but 0.99

00:43:12.800 i'm actually i'm actually proud to uh uh last note zoltan my dad backhands maybe a few fists

00:43:24.200 here and there whatever right his dad because he would say to me you're lucky that's all you got

00:43:31.040 my dad had a thing called a cat of nine tails what yes there's a name for it

00:43:38.820 it was a belt that had nine little belts on the end of it.

00:43:45.220 It was a whip.

00:43:46.420 It was a whip. 1.00

00:43:47.340 Sounds like a sex toy. 1.00

00:43:48.360 Yeah, 1.00

00:43:48.520 I know. 0.98

00:43:48.720 It's kind of fucked up actually. 0.96

00:43:49.760 Now that I think back to it now, 0.97

00:43:51.240 maybe what you were saying earlier about Zoltan and bet makes sense.

00:43:54.400 Maybe you were honest on that.

00:43:55.540 What is my name?

00:43:57.520 Zoltan.

00:44:00.280 Zoltan,

00:44:00.800 please.

00:44:01.260 I'm sorry.

00:44:01.980 No more shoes.

00:44:03.100 Zoltan.

00:44:03.320 I'm so sorry.

00:44:04.160 I leave my boots outside.

00:44:05.120 My dad was going to name me

00:44:09.920 Guetagas

00:44:10.540 That's my father's name

00:44:13.380 You understand you never would have got the equity

00:44:15.700 You never would have

00:44:17.420 Guetagas, Emmanuel Janko

00:44:20.460 Was supposed to be my name

00:44:21.600 I think it would have been cool

00:44:23.960 Then they went with Emmanuel

00:44:25.280 We're going to name Emmanuel

00:44:26.760 They spelled Emmanuel wrong

00:44:28.120 I only have one N 0.91

00:44:30.220 I'm missing an N

00:44:32.320 I swear to God this is the truth 1.00

00:44:33.980 George Emanuel Janko

00:44:35.220 My father

00:44:35.960 You should say it faster

00:44:36.760 Last second 0.84

00:44:37.840 She 1.00

00:44:38.740 My mother just pushed me out 1.00

00:44:40.940 Went through war

00:44:42.240 My father gets the paperwork

00:44:44.040 She goes

00:44:44.720 Just want to make sure it's 0.99

00:44:45.640 Emanuel

00:44:47.000 George Janko

00:44:48.200 My guy goes

00:44:48.800 No no no no

00:44:50.360 No you're lying

00:44:51.760 He goes

00:44:52.840 No no no 0.96

00:44:53.400 She's

00:44:53.760 She's so tired

00:44:55.360 Poor girl 0.91

00:44:55.760 George 0.89

00:44:57.660 Emanuel

00:44:59.000 Janko

00:45:00.420 She goes

00:45:01.260 No way 1.00

00:45:01.820 Yep

00:45:02.040 Oh just sign here 0.97

00:45:02.880 Okie dokie

00:45:04.140 No way.

00:45:05.680 My mom, I think like years later,

00:45:08.660 when they're doing my baptism,

00:45:09.920 they're like, oh, where's his birth certificate?

00:45:11.400 All this stuff.

00:45:12.140 And she shows, she goes, what is this?

00:45:13.920 Till this day, my mother goes,

00:45:15.580 your name is Emmanuel. 1.00

00:45:18.020 Emmanuel, this rat bastard. 1.00

00:45:20.000 While I was getting cleaned up 1.00

00:45:21.760 after you came out of me,

00:45:23.360 change your name to George Janko.

00:45:25.280 I think we're forgetting to mention

00:45:26.520 that your dad's name is George.

00:45:27.900 His name's Guy Wedigis.

00:45:29.080 Oh.

00:45:30.280 They were going to name me after him.

00:45:31.500 I'm technically not a junior.

00:45:33.640 I am George Janko.

00:45:35.680 Oh, what?

00:45:36.340 And I'm really mad about this.

00:45:37.620 Ghiwedigis in Assyrian means George.

00:45:39.240 Why am I just finding this out?

00:45:40.420 So I found, you know how pissed I was?

00:45:42.200 I wanted to name my kid George Janko III. 1.00

00:45:46.140 I'm going to fuck around. 0.99

00:45:47.200 And when my dad starts losing it, I'm going to bring him into the office, 1.00

00:45:49.840 change his name the way he did mine.

00:45:51.660 He's like, what are we doing in the DMV?

00:45:53.360 I was like, God, it's a sponge bath.

00:45:54.640 Just sign these papers here.

00:45:56.000 And that way I can name my kid George Janko III.

00:45:59.160 So I guess people need to figure this out.

00:46:01.300 Are we going to break this cycle?

00:46:02.800 are clearly I think

00:46:04.020 child abuse is over it seems like

00:46:06.660 at least legally

00:46:07.340 well but it is

00:46:10.500 legally and you know

00:46:11.740 you can beat your kids though 0.99

00:46:12.900 wait could you like smack them 0.99

00:46:15.700 I don't know what the 0.84

00:46:17.200 yeah cause they go to school and say like you know

00:46:19.180 my dad you know he smacked me

00:46:21.640 smacked my bottom you know like it was already

00:46:23.920 starting to happen with us 0.63

00:46:25.260 you gotta treat them with fear

00:46:27.620 no I'm with you

00:46:29.140 no for real

00:46:29.580 I think we're entering a generation

00:46:33.240 Where we're going to find out

00:46:34.820 What maybe the product of like a more

00:46:37.060 Loving

00:46:38.600 Non-fear based household

00:46:41.160 Will produce

00:46:42.040 What do you think it'll produce? 1.00

00:46:44.600 Pussies 1.00

00:46:44.920 Could be women without pussies 1.00

00:46:49.180 I don't even know at this point 1.00

00:46:50.160 There you go again

00:46:50.660 I'm going to be the one that gets cancelled by this group

00:46:56.800 What do you got?

00:46:57.320 What do you think?

00:46:57.940 nah that's it

00:46:58.980 what do you got Logan

00:46:59.540 what do you think

00:47:00.040 what do you think

00:47:01.240 the future's gonna hold

00:47:02.200 I have no idea

00:47:03.320 I just think about it

00:47:04.800 often about

00:47:05.440 this generation

00:47:06.900 that's being raised

00:47:07.960 so vastly different

00:47:09.340 than every single 0.98

00:47:10.800 other generation

00:47:11.680 in history

00:47:12.580 humans have been around

00:47:13.560 for 70,000 years

00:47:14.980 yeah

00:47:15.440 say this all the time

00:47:16.560 homo sapiens sapiens

00:47:17.860 people like you and I

00:47:18.800 just not as smart

00:47:19.780 or

00:47:20.240 how long did you say

00:47:21.300 70,000

00:47:22.540 homo sapiens sapiens

00:47:23.860 70,000

00:47:27.240 70,000 years?

00:47:29.920 Well, sorry, sorry.

00:47:33.420 Are these people who, not even being funny, but are these, in the beginning of this, are

00:47:38.180 these people that just actually did have Chewbacca arms?

00:47:41.100 Like, how close are they?

00:47:42.520 Like, do you know what I'm saying?

00:47:43.220 Like, at what point did the first, like, oh, wow, like, that person has arms happen?

00:47:48.420 Yeah.

00:47:48.660 Do you know what I'm saying? 1.00

00:47:49.040 Not fucking gorilla arms. 0.99

00:47:51.100 And by the way, like, you're offending me and George who know, obviously, that people 0.99

00:47:55.160 were beamed down to the Garden of Eden roughly

00:47:56.920 4,000 years ago. 0.99

00:47:59.300 So if you want to have this little fucking confrontation, 0.99

00:48:01.420 we could do it, Darwin. 0.99

00:48:03.100 Oh. No, I'm not going to jump

00:48:05.200 into that. Oh, yeah, you're not? But what I

00:48:07.120 will jump into is- We didn't ask you what you would

00:48:09.260 jump in. What you thought before that is what they're going to be like

00:48:11.320 and I

00:48:12.240 joke a lot about my parents beating us.

00:48:14.960 Obviously, we all are.

00:48:16.860 No, no, no. We got our ass kicked, but 0.99

00:48:18.660 it's not like to the point where we're like, hey, 1.00

00:48:21.380 happy Easter, dad, and then he just beats the fuck

00:48:23.120 out of me. It's not like that. I think 0.96

00:48:24.780 my parents did a fantastic job raising me because they knew where to draw the line with respect and

00:48:30.820 i think if you don't have that line if your kids could treat your because my parents are my best

00:48:36.340 friends but there is that line of respect that i'll never cross with them of course and i think

00:48:40.520 that is like it was built off of that fear i think fear is not a bad thing all the time if you're 0.96

00:48:47.260 doing it there's a fear of letting your loved ones slip away if you fuck up i've made a mistake 0.99

00:48:52.280 You've made a grave error 0.99

00:48:53.860 300,000 years humans have been around 1.00

00:48:55.680 Civilizations around

00:48:57.440 6,000 years ago

00:48:59.440 I'm actually fascinated

00:49:03.940 This is not what the scripture says

00:49:05.420 You don't believe that?

00:49:08.300 Well first of all that's a hypothesis

00:49:10.500 It's an educated guess

00:49:11.640 It's not factual

00:49:12.740 But also

00:49:13.620 What are you some sort of antichrist Paul? 0.98

00:49:17.000 The bible's calendar is very accurate

00:49:19.000 That's why countries use it

00:49:20.360 Even people that don't acknowledge the Bible

00:49:22.340 They use the calendar of the Bible

00:49:23.740 That's why in our history books

00:49:25.060 I unfortunately can't verify what you're saying

00:49:27.800 BC and AC

00:49:28.560 Those are just letters

00:49:31.000 I can't verify what you're saying

00:49:34.140 I know

00:49:36.200 That's why I didn't want to stay on that topic

00:49:38.860 At the end of the day

00:49:39.720 I'm just curious about your theology

00:49:43.420 You believe both of you

00:49:45.060 Don't ask me I actually don't know what I'm talking about

00:49:47.140 You can ask me

00:49:47.980 He mentioned humans were, what,

00:49:50.840 beamed down 4,000 years ago?

00:49:52.580 Is that what he said?

00:49:53.320 What do you mean, beamed down?

00:49:54.080 I don't know.

00:49:54.380 That's what Mike said.

00:49:55.080 No, he's just joking around.

00:49:56.040 Oh, so the Garden of Eden

00:49:58.060 is where Adam and Eve were. 0.67

00:49:59.620 The first humans.

00:50:00.440 When?

00:50:00.680 The first humans.

00:50:01.040 When?

00:50:02.600 On day seven.

00:50:03.780 I don't know.

00:50:05.160 I think it was day seven

00:50:06.200 and Adam was created, yeah.

00:50:08.000 Were the dinosaurs around?

00:50:10.800 Yes, actually, yes.

00:50:11.900 And the scripture does bring up dinosaurs.

00:50:13.260 What does it say?

00:50:15.180 I mean, I don't know.

00:50:16.060 i don't like to i don't like to speak scripture unless i'm reading it because i hate false

00:50:19.860 doctrines just give us the cliff notes man uh basically what i think is through the studies

00:50:23.820 of what i've read and and reading the scripture versus what scientists have it's actually very

00:50:29.260 accurate and very much the same that's why i really don't understand when people are like

00:50:33.100 if you don't believe in um uh the bible you're not gonna believe in our history like like for

00:50:38.440 example giants or or dinosaurs and stuff and i and i thoroughly believe in that and also they

00:50:42.960 say they don't believe in aliens i disagree with that because god's a creator you know he's created

00:50:47.280 before us and he's gonna create after us so when people are like how would the beginning start

00:50:51.180 or how is it ending there's so many questions that are like up in the air and that's where

00:50:55.420 faith has to step in and like at the end of the day we're all on the spinning rock and choosing

00:50:59.720 to believe in some people think it's more of a pancake well you know that's their theology and

00:51:03.700 i respect it you actually do respect i respect everybody did you say giants at one i believe in

00:51:08.040 giants yeah david and goliath and then there's actually giants in museums and i think it's in

00:51:11.980 Egypt.

00:51:12.620 Egypt or Jerusalem.

00:51:14.120 How big?

00:51:16.000 Again, I don't like to just speak,

00:51:17.540 but I know that there is giants in museums.

00:51:20.660 You can Google this.

00:51:21.880 This is something you can...

00:51:22.660 Is that part...

00:51:24.480 Do you have anything on that part?

00:51:25.780 You can Google it.

00:51:26.440 You can see what museums they have.

00:51:28.120 Sounds reasonable.

00:51:29.940 Are you serious?

00:51:31.560 Sounds like giants could be real.

00:51:36.580 Okay. 1.00

00:51:39.260 Fucking giants, George. 1.00

00:51:40.480 What are you saying right now? 1.00

00:51:41.520 I believe in giants.

00:51:42.740 How big?

00:51:43.560 How big are the giants, dude?

00:51:45.440 Probably as tall as a ceiling, maybe.

00:51:47.060 Oh, see? 0.99

00:51:48.160 That's not a fucking giant. 1.00

00:51:48.760 That's just a tall-ass guy. 0.99

00:51:50.320 No, but to us, that's giant. 0.82

00:51:51.860 I mean, to me, that's giant, bro.

00:51:53.080 I mean, yeah.

00:51:53.780 There's probably a couple.

00:51:54.800 I mean, I don't know how big we're talking about giants.

00:51:56.680 Okay, imagine this.

00:51:57.660 Yeah, yeah, yeah.

00:51:58.060 You're 50,000 years old.

00:52:00.440 50,000?

00:52:01.340 Got it?

00:52:01.800 Just kidding.

00:52:02.560 You were born 50,000 years ago.

00:52:04.220 You're a human, right?

00:52:04.900 Yes, yes. 1.00

00:52:05.380 And you see one of you and your clan that is fucking massive. 0.99

00:52:10.000 The genetic mutation in the nearby tribe 1.00

00:52:12.220 I go dead guy, giant 0.98

00:52:13.720 Dead guy, giant 0.97

00:52:16.420 Right, right, right

00:52:17.100 You write it down

00:52:18.320 You remember it

00:52:19.300 The stories get passed down

00:52:20.340 Generation, generation, generation

00:52:22.020 And yeah

00:52:22.620 Humans embellish and tell stories

00:52:24.480 So I can imagine how

00:52:25.680 Through a weird, very long series of telephone

00:52:29.260 Well, look it up

00:52:30.080 The eight foot guy becomes a giant

00:52:32.080 Okay, you believe in dinosaurs

00:52:34.300 Because of fossils and bones

00:52:35.460 And all that stuff, right?

00:52:36.440 So look this up and see what the tallest man

00:52:38.280 You tell me what to type in

00:52:39.960 Type in, I don't know, Giants and Museums

00:52:42.860 I feel like if there was one

00:52:44.220 That would be the way to look it up

00:52:45.520 But you said there was

00:52:46.960 I have seen articles about them

00:52:50.720 But again, I can't

00:52:51.420 I have to see what the search

00:52:52.860 I have to see it with my own eyes

00:52:55.740 This is 1.00

00:52:56.240 I mean, these are just tall fucking people 0.99

00:53:00.760 Who they took their bones after they died 0.99

00:53:02.720 Put them into a dinosaur museum

00:53:04.660 That's a T-Rex, Mike

00:53:05.960 I mean, yeah 0.98

00:53:09.200 These people are fucking tall 0.98

00:53:10.460 It's like the Kemi Mutombo 0.99

00:53:11.780 So again 0.90

00:53:12.680 Hold on 1.00

00:53:13.200 This guy's actually tall as fuck 0.99

00:53:14.200 That's what I'm saying 0.99

00:53:14.580 Well they positioned him next to a 1.00

00:53:16.260 A what?

00:53:18.720 Person of

00:53:19.340 Asparagus

00:53:19.720 Those are

00:53:23.020 Wow

00:53:23.260 These are

00:53:24.080 Wow

00:53:24.840 That's what I'm saying bro

00:53:26.720 Like

00:53:26.960 Talking about giants

00:53:27.960 Oh wait

00:53:29.400 Wait

00:53:29.720 Many of the 5,000 year old skeletons

00:53:31.800 Measured 5 foot 9 inches

00:53:33.340 For long

00:53:34.000 A human's exceptionally tall

00:53:36.400 For that period

00:53:36.880 Which is the other

00:53:37.520 Look

00:53:37.880 All I'm saying is this 0.99

00:53:38.920 they were in the fucking giants bro 0.99

00:53:40.500 well here's another thing we can't just shut down 0.99

00:53:43.600 every like you're right I have no

00:53:45.460 idea but that's why when people 0.99

00:53:47.340 are like yo flat earthers are fucking 0.95

00:53:49.260 crazy I'm gonna be quite honest with you if we 0.99

00:53:51.360 died and God was like dude you'll never believe 1.00

00:53:53.380 this but your fucking planet 1.00

00:53:55.360 was flat as shit 1.00

00:53:56.680 I would have been like nah come on 0.99

00:53:58.920 nah come on that's where I

00:54:00.420 draw the line because listen what you're talking about 0.99

00:54:03.000 nah stop let me fucking say this 1.00

00:54:05.400 shit right now what you're talking about 1.00

00:54:07.480 right now yeah is this uh renee descartesque theory of the inability to believe in one's 0.99

00:54:16.480 senses sight sound feel yeah whatever right i can go up in a rocket please be careful if you do this

00:54:25.680 especially if you have a pending lawsuit i can go up in a rocket and see that the earth has 0.62

00:54:32.040 fucking roundness to it so if i can in real time verify the reality of a certain thesis okay then 0.69

00:54:40.580 then then yeah dude we do know so here's my unless of course you're saying that we can't 0.95

00:54:45.560 trust our senses which is not meta conversation have you jumped in a rocket and actually seen it

00:54:50.600 so this is this is where i lay my eyes on i i tend not to just be like i know mike has been up there

00:54:56.860 and i know 100 i always leave room for my mind to grow what if i had i don't like to have a glass

00:55:01.600 ceiling. What if I had been up there? Would you believe

00:55:03.520 it a hundred percent?

00:55:05.620 For me to believe it a hundred percent,

00:55:07.520 I have to see it. What about me?

00:55:09.480 What about me? You know me.

00:55:11.420 Come on, you know me. I'll trust you more.

00:55:14.360 How do I know you are

00:55:15.400 smoking crack rocks up there? I'm the only

00:55:17.540 one in this group that doesn't do hard

00:55:19.420 illicit drugs. That is true. Are you

00:55:21.280 kidding me? You do fucking drugs now. 1.00

00:55:23.640 You do do head? Yo. 1.00

00:55:25.940 Take it away, 1.00

00:55:27.220 blocks. We have to 1.00

00:55:29.200 stop this narrative. I'm going to fucking 0.99

00:55:31.080 you up. Both of you. 1.00

00:55:33.260 Because they're going to watch this and go, he's getting

00:55:35.340 defensive. He really is.

00:55:37.560 Like, no, bro. How did this get

00:55:39.400 started? Why are you perpetuating it?

00:55:41.440 You know what the headlines were saying. I know the headlines,

00:55:43.660 George. Here's it. How would you feel

00:55:45.440 if, God forbid, you passed away from doing hard drugs

00:55:47.340 and I was lying to everybody, saying like,

00:55:49.340 yo, he was never doing it. And then all the

00:55:51.240 fucking news articles would be like, his best friends didn't even 1.00

00:55:53.360 fucking stop him. This is what happens with pop stars. 1.00

00:55:55.600 This is what I do.

00:55:57.320 I drink probably three nights

00:55:59.340 a week. No, there's no way we're doing this again.

00:56:00.760 There's no fucking way you're lying like that 0.99

00:56:02.720 Stop 1.00

00:56:03.280 You tell them about my habits 0.99

00:56:05.480 No, because now he's clearly fucking around 0.99

00:56:06.640 Okay, tell me who am I 0.99

00:56:08.340 No words, ready?

00:56:11.740 Stop

00:56:12.220 Stop 1.00

00:56:13.300 What the fuck 0.99

00:56:14.980 Actually 1.00

00:56:15.960 Now you're mic

00:56:19.820 Oh my god

00:56:21.120 Oh my god

00:56:23.020 Is Steven D's intravenous using airway 1.00

00:56:26.560 Holy shit 0.99

00:56:27.180 Oh, that sign's about to fall on him 0.99

00:56:29.220 Oh, he does that a few more times 0.99

00:56:30.660 he's impaled dude you want to hear the most fucked up part they've been getting mad at me 0.96

00:56:36.520 because they're like as someone who talks about you know safety and drug addiction and getting 0.99

00:56:41.640 off drugs that you should be the one to be more serious about this let me tell you son 0.99

00:56:45.920 us drug addicts are fucked up real dark sons of bitches that's the reason we use drugs in the 1.00

00:56:52.360 first fucking place we're fucked we're fucked of course i'm gonna fuck with the kid of course i'm 1.00

00:56:57.780 to fuck with the kid. 1.00

00:57:00.100 He's still down there, huh? 1.00

00:57:02.560 Especially because there's nothing

00:57:03.600 he ain't doing anything. 0.97

00:57:04.720 He's not fucking doing drugs, 1.00

00:57:06.020 you fucking morons. 1.00

00:57:08.700 If he was actually doing drugs, 1.00

00:57:10.180 that would be a different story.

00:57:10.940 Then it wouldn't be as funny

00:57:11.700 of a conversation. 0.99

00:57:12.420 He's not fucking doing drugs. 0.98

00:57:13.620 I don't think that conversation 0.99

00:57:14.660 would be funny at all.

00:57:15.680 I think, you know.

00:57:16.580 What, what?

00:57:17.280 If I were.

00:57:18.020 No, I said it wouldn't be

00:57:19.660 a funny conversation. 0.99

00:57:20.540 It would be a fucking dead serious. 1.00

00:57:21.920 I'd be zolting on your ass. 1.00

00:57:23.860 Yeah, absolutely. 1.00

00:57:25.160 You ain't ever going to touch 1.00

00:57:26.320 a fucking drip of blow. 0.99

00:57:27.780 Okay, speaking of blow, 1.00

00:57:29.920 is Ryan Reynolds the coolest guy on the fucking planet? 0.99

00:57:32.560 You know what's so funny? 0.99

00:57:33.380 He got me into doing rom-coms, bro. 0.98

00:57:35.280 Like, I've been a huge fan of him since fucking Blade. 0.81

00:57:37.540 Why is he so cool? 0.96

00:57:39.020 Why is he so...

00:57:39.680 He's effortless.

00:57:40.700 He doesn't try hard.

00:57:41.560 He goes in a different direction.

00:57:42.940 His comedy's fresh.

00:57:44.520 He's a good-looking man that's confident,

00:57:46.220 that has a love interest in real life,

00:57:48.240 and it makes it cool to be in a healthy relationship. 1.00

00:57:50.060 He's such a dick already. 1.00

00:57:51.080 First of all, I would. 1.00

00:57:52.340 I would.

00:57:52.580 Everyone would. 1.00

00:57:53.260 Gun to fucking head. 1.00

00:57:53.960 No, no, no. 1.00

00:57:54.240 I'm going to shuck his dick. 1.00

00:57:55.260 I'd be like, put the gun in there. 1.00

00:57:56.340 Now you're talking about 1.00

00:57:57.460 Put the fucking gun away 1.00

00:57:59.960 It's Ryan Rettel 1.00

00:58:01.000 Free guy

00:58:01.720 Free ball it in my face

00:58:03.200 Sorry

00:58:03.680 I'm so sorry

00:58:04.300 You've thought about this

00:58:05.740 A few times

00:58:06.540 No everyone would

00:58:08.060 That's what I'm saying 0.97

00:58:09.020 He's so fucking cool 0.96

00:58:10.460 And likable 0.88

00:58:11.260 And like

00:58:11.660 I can't imagine

00:58:13.880 Like being that awesome

00:58:16.320 If you

00:58:16.960 If he was in a room

00:58:18.120 Do you not agree 0.98

00:58:20.000 That every girl in the room

00:58:21.080 Will flock towards Ryan Rettel

00:58:22.660 Not if Leo was there

00:58:23.800 Not if Leo was there 0.99

00:58:25.460 no fuck that Leo over Ryan Reynolds 0.99

00:58:27.880 dog dude that ship has sailed 1.00

00:58:29.620 hold on a sec brother

00:58:30.820 why don't you do me a favor and stop

00:58:33.700 we're sitting here talking about

00:58:39.620 one of the greatest actors

00:58:41.580 Ryan Reynolds

00:58:42.160 when in comparison to

00:58:45.000 the Michael Jordan of acting

00:58:47.180 equates to a high school

00:58:49.780 baller brother 0.99

00:58:51.140 there is no fucking 1.00

00:58:53.320 no just shut your god 1.00

00:58:55.440 forsaken yap and let me finish 1.00

00:58:57.600 this fucking point okay 1.00

00:58:58.880 when LeBron 0.99

00:59:01.460 James goes to play a game of pickup 1.00

00:59:03.400 yeah with a couple sissy nannies 1.00

00:59:05.620 down at the local brewery 1.00

00:59:06.960 I don't know why they're playing basketball

00:59:09.020 the brewery got a battle

00:59:12.000 whoever was the big 1.00

00:59:13.900 big dick dunker that day 1.00

00:59:15.900 no longer is brother and I assure 0.97

00:59:17.920 you Mr. Type

00:59:19.440 Ryan Reynolds plays a great role

00:59:21.500 it's called the Ryan Reynolds role

00:59:23.240 I'm fine stop

00:59:25.320 I am almost done let me finish my point

00:59:27.780 Okay finish it quick

00:59:28.920 I'm funny I'm romantic

00:59:32.180 I look at me make funny

00:59:34.080 Predictable jokes

00:59:35.200 Then you got

00:59:37.940 Then you have Leo 0.97

00:59:38.860 Sex icon 0.92

00:59:41.940 From the Revenant 0.72

00:59:44.960 To Wolf of Wall Street

00:59:47.060 To Titanic

00:59:48.320 A chameleon

00:59:50.780 Of cinema

00:59:52.860 and art

00:59:54.180 embodied in one of the most 0.73

00:59:56.540 sexualized humans in the history 0.71

00:59:58.840 of this planet.

01:00:00.280 A man who was able to make Jeff

01:00:02.700 Bezos' wife

01:00:03.780 erect 0.78

01:00:05.720 erect

01:00:08.920 sprinkle

01:00:10.520 like a spring shower

01:00:13.180 all the way down

01:00:16.400 to the newest, hottest

01:00:18.460 19-year-old model

01:00:20.600 who thinks Leo is also the

01:00:22.520 sexiest man on the... Leo

01:00:24.240 Trump's

01:00:26.500 Reynolds.

01:00:28.460 In what category? There's what I'm saying.

01:00:30.780 All categories. I think

01:00:32.900 Ryan Reynolds could

01:00:34.240 possibly be cooler. I mean, obviously.

01:00:37.220 Here's the situation.

01:00:38.320 We don't know who Leo is. He's an actor, right?

01:00:40.500 There's an actor? What's Ryan Reynolds? There's actors?

01:00:42.800 He's Ryan Reynolds. You just said he plays

01:00:44.260 one role. It's Ryan Reynolds.

01:00:45.960 No, he's Ryan Reynolds. So you think it's just a direct

01:00:48.420 equation to his real life character?

01:00:49.680 hey guys I'm Ryan Reynolds I'm free guy

01:00:52.540 no he's less animated for sure

01:00:54.200 here's the thing there's

01:00:56.360 actors that are super

01:00:58.380 respected in this industry like for example

01:01:00.600 Leonardo DiCaprio

01:01:01.940 and then we have movie stars

01:01:04.160 there's difference

01:01:05.760 there's a movie star like Kevin Hart

01:01:08.360 Dwayne The Rock Johnson, Ryan Reynolds

01:01:10.680 they play the same character in the different 0.99

01:01:12.640 movies because they're the fucking guy 0.99

01:01:14.460 now Leonardo DiCaprio isn't playing 1.00

01:01:16.540 himself because he's not the guy

01:01:18.900 No, no, no, no, no, no.

01:01:19.920 In fact, it's the exact opposite.

01:01:22.720 Since he doesn't play the same character in every movie,

01:01:25.440 he is the guy.

01:01:26.920 In the movies, in the movies.

01:01:28.380 No, no, no, no, no, no, no.

01:01:29.580 He's the boss.

01:01:30.120 Yeah, yeah.

01:01:30.940 He's the boss in acting.

01:01:31.740 No, no, no, no, no. 1.00

01:01:32.360 Fuck that. 1.00

01:01:33.260 When it comes to acting, 1.00

01:01:34.620 when it comes to working a room,

01:01:36.340 when it comes to being the biggest sex icon,

01:01:39.760 when it comes to everything,

01:01:41.600 y'all are not understanding this properly.

01:01:44.060 He might have a point, George.

01:01:45.280 At one point, it was Brad Pitt.

01:01:47.000 At one point, it was...

01:01:48.120 And by the way, listen, I'm not saying that Reynolds is dramatically lower.

01:01:51.720 It's not like some sort of massive declassification.

01:01:54.600 But what a fun career to have.

01:01:56.340 A hundred percent.

01:01:57.000 That's what I'm saying.

01:01:57.640 I want his career more than I want Leo's.

01:02:00.200 And I'll tell you why.

01:02:00.980 He has an amazing, I mean, by the way, this is what we've seen on the media. 0.99

01:02:05.120 I don't know the fuck. 0.98

01:02:05.860 I'm not going to the brewery where LeBron James is playing basketball. 0.99

01:02:09.340 I'm just saying that when I see his lifestyle from my point of view, having a great wife,

01:02:14.980 kids that he loves

01:02:16.400 an industry that he walks in and runs

01:02:18.800 movies that are box office

01:02:20.640 hits, grand slams

01:02:22.260 that even other huge celebrities are wanting

01:02:24.700 guest stars in him because they love his art

01:02:26.660 that is why I want to do

01:02:28.260 listen, listen, listen

01:02:30.520 you're both making great points

01:02:31.980 I think we have to leave this up to the audience

01:02:33.980 I really do want to know

01:02:35.440 Ryan Reynolds or Leo

01:02:37.100 I mean like if they're in a room

01:02:39.660 here's the question

01:02:41.760 no, no, no, I'm not asking

01:02:43.240 I'm saying

01:02:43.820 if you're in a room

01:02:45.140 and they're both there

01:02:45.860 on opposite sides

01:02:46.560 of the room

01:02:46.980 who are you gonna go

01:02:48.520 try to meet

01:02:48.940 you have one

01:02:49.840 pick one

01:02:50.880 we're putting a poll

01:02:51.980 we're putting a poll

01:02:52.740 we're putting a poll

01:02:53.940 we're putting a poll

01:02:53.960 is it Leo talking

01:02:55.740 about the icebergs melting

01:02:56.800 whoa don't try to bias

01:02:57.860 the opinion of the

01:02:58.880 the glaciers are melting

01:03:00.980 as far as

01:03:02.160 oh how dare he

01:03:03.560 try to save the planet 1.00

01:03:04.400 fuck you George 1.00

01:03:06.280 or Deadpool 1.00

01:03:06.380 talking about penis jokes 0.99

01:03:07.560 all the time 1.00

01:03:08.100 okay

01:03:08.860 as far as

01:03:10.040 as far as

01:03:10.700 the actual acting goes

01:03:11.860 last part of it

01:03:12.560 is you ask me like what makes someone great or that guy.

01:03:16.480 My simple answer, as I said yesterday,

01:03:18.400 would be depth of roles. 1.00

01:03:20.480 Depth of fucking roles. 0.99

01:03:22.300 McConaughey. 1.00

01:03:23.180 Depth of roles.

01:03:24.080 Yeah, yeah, yeah.

01:03:24.840 McConaughey?

01:03:25.360 You made your point.

01:03:25.940 Yeah, absolutely.

01:03:26.380 Yeah, it's weird you said it like that.

01:03:27.960 It's weird you said it like that.

01:03:29.380 What about that guy?

01:03:30.180 McConaughey.

01:03:30.940 McConaughey.

01:03:31.500 What about that guy? 1.00

01:03:32.160 Oh, that's a fuck up. 1.00

01:03:32.880 I'm heated. 1.00

01:03:33.940 Yeah, bring him on.

01:03:35.180 Ladies and gentlemen.

01:03:35.960 Can we turn the lights down?

01:03:38.340 Mac.

01:03:38.960 Mac.

01:03:39.300 Mac is back.

01:03:42.560 Mac is back guys

01:03:44.300 as you know

01:03:45.460 and if you don't know

01:03:46.800 Mac has been my

01:03:47.480 best friend

01:03:48.360 since I was six years old

01:03:49.660 we raced in the playground

01:03:50.720 I beat him

01:03:52.420 and ever since then

01:03:54.020 we became best friends

01:03:55.560 until obviously

01:03:56.840 of course

01:03:57.280 last year

01:03:58.500 Logan infamously

01:03:59.540 bullied him off the show

01:04:00.580 well I never mentioned

01:04:01.300 he was on the show again

01:04:02.140 so it's still building up context

01:04:03.400 but let me know

01:04:04.240 when you want to take this over

01:04:05.340 and then he came on

01:04:06.460 the podcast

01:04:06.960 and Paul said

01:04:07.400 we had him on

01:04:08.020 for about 100 plus episodes

01:04:09.940 right

01:04:10.680 and then

01:04:11.100 and then Mike bullied him

01:04:12.280 off the show and wait was that really a thing did you guys get in a tiff on the show a little bit

01:04:17.880 yeah yeah what would you guys tiff about uh it's hard to be the third person on a podcast

01:04:23.480 with two very vocal main hosts i feel you when i was on the podcast you were such a great host to

01:04:30.440 me i remember you respected me you wanted me to speak you spoke at right times 0.98

01:04:35.020 unlike this fuck over here 1.00

01:04:38.240 damn the balls on this guy 1.00

01:04:41.600 no because 1.00

01:04:42.800 so how you been Mac

01:04:44.780 I'm good I just went on a good run

01:04:46.880 with my new friend Mike

01:04:47.960 Posner from the last episode right

01:04:50.040 next episode Mike Posner

01:04:51.520 he was here in the building and asked me if I want to go for a run

01:04:55.200 so we went for a little run

01:04:56.100 I've been hanging out in Puerto Rico helping this tall blonde kid

01:04:59.240 on an art project

01:05:01.800 that he just recently started

01:05:03.440 um yeah living life doing my thing quiet chilling out what about your own crafts the stuff that

01:05:11.240 you're doing uh painting writing poetry that kind of stuff is that still cooking yeah did you ever

01:05:15.480 get that uh place that you wanted to get for your art uh yeah i rented a giant warehouse for a while

01:05:20.020 it was pretty cool didn't ultimately work out because i didn't need all that space you think

01:05:23.840 you want this grand uh you know ultimate creation warehouse but then you find out that you're only

01:05:29.040 working on one small table i stopped making large paintings went to smaller stuff and uh started

01:05:35.160 working more on some tech stuff and that's more computer focus as opposed to art centric and i

01:05:41.480 only need one laptop and i could travel the world with that so any learnings from when you were off

01:05:47.320 the podcast and now like a ton it's been it's been about a year and a half we've all had a lot

01:05:52.020 of self-growth yeah and learnings and knowledge yeah i was actually just talking with mike about

01:05:55.760 this you get to la and uh you know me being ultimately and abruptly thrust into a massive

01:06:03.680 hollywood household with a maid a chef seven friends ten people always in the house um and

01:06:10.900 then leaving that to go to a one person household where it's me taking care of all my stuff i was a

01:06:18.360 mess i was a slob i wasn't taking care of myself i wasn't working out i wasn't eating properly

01:06:23.620 i wasn't focused um which i found was a product of like helping other people with their little

01:06:29.600 projects as i could and then when i had so much self-focused time i didn't know what to do with

01:06:35.600 all of it yeah um and what i found was i need to use that time to take care of my space

01:06:40.720 because i was an absolute wreck and i had a lot of luxuries my ego became inflated

01:06:49.500 and it wasn't my personal ownership of those things so then i got to go back home humble

01:06:56.680 myself heavily or get humbled i would say um by a cold cold cleveland winter and uh

01:07:03.280 yeah we all go through the dark moments right especially on gray days

01:07:07.600 so have a have a couple dark days every now and again during the winter times

01:07:12.460 make great art from that pain you know first four letters of painting 0.98

01:07:15.940 oh shit yeah it's like a painting yeah oh i never even thought about that i'm a word guy 0.84

01:07:23.140 um yeah i started writing more so now i'm a poet mostly and uh other things i learned 0.99

01:07:29.560 you got to stay focused on your physical otherwise your mental will start to deteriorate

01:07:34.800 mike you're big on that one and uh make sure you appreciate every moment of beautiful things that

01:07:43.140 other people have worked very hard for that have come into your life by a product of someone else

01:07:46.740 achieving them. I love all of that. So that's really cool. That's actually sick. That's a

01:07:51.720 lot of growth. Yep. There's a lot of growth. Holy shit, man. I haven't even thought about

01:07:59.820 it from that perspective. You're a good freestyler too, by the way. Oh yeah. You are. We have so

01:08:06.120 much fun. He's a wordsmith. He's a wordsmith. Make, make no mistake. He's very fucking good

01:08:11.460 with works yeah you've been freestyling since high school we used to drive around in uh remember 0.99

01:08:15.900 the oppa the big yeah of course we get the crew together we play stupid instrumentals and everybody

01:08:22.940 had to freestyle i was just i got better i guess you've been doing acid or anything no no see in 0.83

01:08:31.560 california you have access to a lot of uh substances i know logan knows yeah and then in

01:08:38.080 Ohio you get back and it's like I'm actually

01:08:39.980 I'm actually putting this to bed

01:08:41.660 right now that's it it's over

01:08:43.840 no it's the last one because

01:08:45.800 because they're not because 0.98

01:08:47.840 because they're not gonna fucking they're 0.98

01:08:51.940 gonna keep guys I'm joking he's 0.97

01:08:53.860 not fucking doing George 0.90

01:08:55.540 stop you remember how Brittany everybody kept 0.98

01:08:57.960 making a big deal they're like look how she looks

01:08:59.760 listen I'm telling you guys

01:09:01.520 everything is fine

01:09:03.280 there's nothing happening

01:09:05.220 okay there's nothing

01:09:07.700 happening. You guys are reading too much

01:09:09.740 into it.

01:09:11.880 There's nothing happening.

01:09:13.800 He's clean. 0.57

01:09:15.920 Check his piss. 1.00

01:09:17.220 Dude, I have fucking people texting 1.00

01:09:19.840 me like, bro. 0.99

01:09:21.520 And by the way, God bless you. If you ever need someone

01:09:23.840 to talk to or reach out to, you know,

01:09:25.700 I've been through the month.

01:09:27.300 I go, what have you heard?

01:09:30.220 How bad is it out there?

01:09:31.680 They're good DMs. I answer the back. I go, don't worry.

01:09:33.860 We're working on it.

01:09:34.600 We put him in a 30 day cleanse

01:09:38.140 Why do you think we're all here

01:09:39.560 We've brought you here to sit you down

01:09:42.940 All your best friends are here in this room

01:09:45.300 You know what 1.00

01:09:46.640 Nah fuck y'all 1.00

01:09:47.640 I'm the victim here 1.00

01:09:49.100 And I'm going to start acting like that

01:09:51.020 Continue to make fun of me

01:09:53.080 Mike Poster comes in

01:09:55.160 Don't take a pill in Ibiza

01:09:57.400 Wish you would have stepped back

01:09:59.600 From that ledge my friend

01:10:01.380 We should just do a lie

01:10:04.080 It would be cool to do a live instant drug test on them.

01:10:08.240 I just think that would be fun to see what... 1.00

01:10:10.020 I mean, you open up fucking Pokemon cards, 0.99

01:10:11.860 you could open up to a little drug test. 1.00

01:10:14.360 Oh, wow, you're scared?

01:10:15.300 It's weird how you got there.

01:10:17.040 Yeah, Pokemon cards.

01:10:18.680 No, open them up.

01:10:19.780 And what was the comparison to the drug test?

01:10:21.940 Well, you open yourself up to the world.

01:10:24.720 Yeah, man, why don't you see the next couple plays out?

01:10:27.220 Hey, man, so when you got bullied on the podcast,

01:10:30.780 how did you get out of that?

01:10:32.240 Yeah, I'm curious, too.

01:10:34.080 Well, I left.

01:10:38.100 I can't do that now.

01:10:39.760 No, it's it's remember that it's good to be patient and listen and that anyone that is willing to respect your thoughts in the conversation will also be willing to listen to what you have to say.

01:10:49.620 Awesome. Thanks for making that real.

01:10:54.560 I feel bad.

01:10:56.360 Listen, a lot of time went by since since that happened.

01:10:59.340 I've had time to process a lot of of who I was at the time, too.

01:11:02.560 and it was it was you know obviously we've already talked about this off show i think we've even

01:11:06.920 talked about an on show before but it was just a very different time i obviously was going through 0.54

01:11:10.460 my own struggles with you know growth and ego and and a lot of the shit and and the show itself was

01:11:15.920 dude honestly it was just a more fiery place at the time i think we i think me and you i think 0.74

01:11:21.480 me and you yeah we had all been living together for the past how long six months where no one was

01:11:27.900 leaving the house doing anything other than sitting on top of each other and i and i think

01:11:32.240 like like like i don't want to make excuses i've told you before you know i said things on the show

01:11:36.820 that i still feel bad about i'm sorry for and i am sorry obviously when i told you that water

01:11:41.360 under the bridge yeah i know now obviously but but i think it was just you know it was it was a

01:11:44.840 it was a different show it was a growth phase of the show and i think you know it's we've gone

01:11:48.520 through so many different versions of this show and so many different like energy styles that i

01:11:55.380 think you know now we're at the one that i i personally like the best you know which is relaxed

01:11:58.960 on the couches we're hanging out we're talking about things that we all like to talk about and

01:12:02.340 um it was a different time i think you've grown a lot in the past year and i don't know if it's

01:12:07.540 when you like had that slip up on that podcast but i'm being serious like when that whole situation

01:12:12.300 happened but me jessica reed and bell were talking about at our house uh the past like month you've

01:12:17.960 always been checking in see what i'm doing if we're planning things because a lot of like

01:12:21.880 coordination stuff have been slipping up and you've been looking out for me making sure i'm

01:12:25.760 booked making sure i'm like doing all that thing so you went from and and i mean this fullheartedly

01:12:30.980 you went from only caring about yourself and what you need to get done around you to starting to

01:12:35.560 look around to make sure people around you need some help and i really appreciate that it shows

01:12:39.320 a lot thanks georgie appreciate that too that was beautiful i just like to reward people when

01:12:45.520 they're doing you know good no i appreciate it and by the way i see it in the comments too

01:12:48.860 a lot lately you know i'm saying like just the growth on the show and everything so it's always

01:12:52.660 nice to see it's a it's very dynamic environment nothing's ever as uh simple as it appears to be

01:12:58.500 when you're watching a show there's a million different billion different fucking factors that

01:13:02.560 go into it that you know as i like to say you know whether it's the audience or the commentary 0.96

01:13:06.740 community or whoever just don't fucking know that's that's the simplest and easiest way to 0.98

01:13:10.580 put it just don't fuck they just don't know is it too meta to be talking about like what goes on 0.99

01:13:14.660 behind the scenes of a podcast like i feel like there should be a fifth i love that no that's 0.99

01:13:19.120 cool there's some podcasts that do a really good job of that that do a really good job of showing 0.99

01:13:22.540 all the people that work the production team like what they're doing they have mics they say shit

01:13:26.860 i feel like our vlogs do a good job of that as well yeah we do a lot of that as well it's almost 0.90

01:13:31.220 like i think the podcast tells like maybe 40 of the story the the the our youtube channels tell

01:13:38.700 10 to 20 of the story and the other 40 will always just be unknown to the public i actually i think

01:13:43.280 there's a lot more told on the podcast and it it's like more real and it's more authentic on the

01:13:47.960 podcast i did not know because i you guys are my friends i didn't watch impulsive when you like when

01:13:53.100 i came over i was just hanging out with you guys and if i needed to know something i would know 0.57

01:13:56.900 from like you guys that's right i had no idea how fucking powerful and how many people watch the

01:14:02.840 show blew me away it's nuts it's insane it's nuts it's it's crazy that that the majority i mean we 0.83

01:14:10.660 say it all the time like everywhere we go it's well obviously they can't tell you that they

01:14:14.840 watched your latest vlog because it's three years ago how's it been being a minority character on

01:14:21.880 two separate vlog channels he loves it it's it's interesting you know um i i have gotten the

01:14:31.800 pleasure of been able being able to just live my life and kevin just shoots and it's really nice

01:14:38.540 because i kind of realized there's so much going on in my life it is it is a show in itself i don't

01:14:44.480 need to play up anything it's fucking insane especially the past you know three and a half 0.95

01:14:49.980 months especially the past three and a half months but these guys you know are always shooting 0.89

01:14:54.760 and my like nonchalance me in real life is what i'm talking about sometimes doesn't play that well

01:15:03.180 from an entertainment point of view and i want to be the best character in their vlogs but i'm just 0.89

01:15:08.760 turning the guy who is like yo fucking turn these cameras off guy you always smack it 0.87

01:15:14.340 Yeah, I've been, I'm like, I don't know. 0.99

01:15:16.300 I'm like grumpy, like drug addict friend now.

01:15:19.040 Like that's, that's like the route we think.

01:15:21.060 Well, no, like quotes, he did an air quotes.

01:15:23.020 Well, cause it's fun.

01:15:23.760 It's like, it was, it worked kind of as a narrative for a second.

01:15:26.480 People were building where I was like, huh.

01:15:28.160 Now it's like, I'm all right, chill.

01:15:29.480 You know, I just like smoking weed.

01:15:31.420 I smoke weed at night and in the day, in the morning and the night.

01:15:34.780 I've learned to pick my days with him, with, with Logan,

01:15:37.440 as far as like having him in the content.

01:15:38.940 Like I'll generally what will happen is like, we'll get to PR.

01:15:41.720 We'll see him on a trip somewhere, and I'll know within the first five minutes of him being around the camera if it's a Logan day or if it's not a Logan day.

01:15:50.040 And there's some days where he's balls to the wall on the project.

01:15:53.080 He's balls to the wall on getting an episode of Impulsive done and all this other stuff, and it's not a Logan day.

01:15:58.020 And then the next day, he wakes up, and he's got the spring in his step.

01:16:00.440 He's making crazy jokes.

01:16:01.700 He's got a ton of energy, and I'm like, today's the day I'm going to get 20 minutes worth of content shot with him.

01:16:06.180 So I think it's just – I think you've turned that off.

01:16:10.040 it still exists but it's just

01:16:12.180 you know I think you're just worried

01:16:14.100 that you're going to come off bad and you've never

01:16:15.820 came off bad no no no that's not what

01:16:18.060 I'm worried about

01:16:19.160 snap at me Jesus Christ

01:16:21.780 I'm trying to like summon

01:16:24.040 a thought you just don't do that

01:16:26.040 stuff anymore you don't do that like that

01:16:28.120 that form of entertainment anymore

01:16:30.060 it's a bit of a muscle

01:16:31.880 and it's a muscle that I think that you've cared to

01:16:34.120 purposely forget I'm going to

01:16:35.460 explain something that is super 0.71

01:16:37.900 fucking unrelatable but it's 0.75

01:16:39.880 it's what we're describing here. All right. For the past seven years of my life, I've built this 0.97

01:16:45.680 brand. I'm going to, I'm going to speak like, I hate speaking like this, but it is this. I built

01:16:50.580 this brand that is known as Logan Paul. That's me, but also the person that I've portrayed and

01:16:59.280 the brand again, isn't a hundred percent accurate to who I am. And the more I enter my adult life

01:17:07.440 and I can just speak on a podcast openly with my friends.

01:17:10.200 And the more I'm like, okay, like every person,

01:17:12.820 I'm starting to discover more and more about who I am

01:17:15.100 and what I like and don't like,

01:17:18.380 what I'm willing to put up with and what I'm not, 0.98

01:17:20.500 where I allocate my energy is a fucking massive one.

01:17:23.760 And I'm less and less enthusiastic about being someone else. 0.97

01:17:30.060 And with that comes a departure from this character

01:17:34.040 that I've built that a lot of people think 0.78

01:17:36.620 is kind of cool a lot of people don't fuck with him right and and a lot of a lot of people want

01:17:41.380 that that guy back the vlog guy and a lot of people are glad he's gone but you know again 0.90

01:17:46.360 i'm maturing and i have this concern mike poser sitting there i'll take a page out of your book

01:17:51.300 and be a little vulnerable here about like just ego wise is uh man i just want people to like me

01:17:57.100 i want to be likable you know and and the more i become me as an adult 0.96

01:18:03.020 am i likable like who am i do people fuck with me the same way they fuck with the high energy 0.86

01:18:09.140 vlog guy who garnered a really large audience because he made a lot of people happy or is 0.91

01:18:14.660 the more chilled out relaxed kind of more real one-to-one guy that you're seeing right now

01:18:20.080 gonna attract a a bigger broader audience or not and do or do i care it's it's all these things i'm

01:18:27.940 weighing out in my mind that i consider and i've not reached the conclusion but all of that is in

01:18:33.920 the back of my head whenever i appear in your vlogs and as a friend i want to give you guys

01:18:37.760 the best right yeah and so i'm i'm doing a little bit of this and it's not a concern i don't think

01:18:42.840 there's any like takeaways i just wanted you to know that that's where my head was at i've seen

01:18:48.500 so many stages of yours and and this is not me trying to like suck up to you all of your versions

01:18:53.900 of yourself has been sick and a lot of people around you have looked up to it uh i like this

01:18:58.440 current stage of you i think you're calmer and you're you're nicer to be around when it comes

01:19:03.720 to like being a person bro for sure you're you're you are now more curious to see how people are

01:19:10.760 around you and before you're so into your set of your goal but now you're mastering i can get this

01:19:17.300 goal and make sure everybody around me is okay as well and i really it dude it's easier said than

01:19:22.500 done but you're killing it and i'm really proud and i think you're gonna become a man that you're

01:19:27.160 very proud of yourself and i think what you're battling is this in between like old you versus

01:19:31.620 new you because we're doing old things that you used to do do you know what gary vanderchuk said

01:19:35.860 to me and it's a fucking massive compliment and when he said it i was first i was like whoa

01:19:43.120 thanks thank you uh but also i kind of feel like that he goes he goes you're uh you're the fresh 0.73

01:19:51.660 prince of bel-air before he became will smith he said you're right now you're marky mark 0.77

01:19:56.740 before he became mark walberg this was in new york at the nfc and it's a massive fucking compliment 0.52

01:20:03.420 and god knows it bro if i could become kind of accurate if i could become a sliver of what either 0.68

01:20:08.300 of those men have have accomplished like i'm happy but in the sense of like character guy thing we

01:20:15.800 don't know uh the spectacle person versus making this really really really um enjoyable uh

01:20:24.360 really considerate version of myself that i want people to know as i blossom into the man i want

01:20:32.120 to be you used to always say i do it for the story and in a story for example a movie the

01:20:36.600 character development really chooses the placement of how good this movie is and if you have a wide

01:20:42.400 character development in your life story it's better and i think that's what is happening to

01:20:46.840 you i think you are transferring over in a good way yeah yeah no it's a very accurate statement

01:20:51.520 that man it's cool it was i i i felt it you know i mean you know i believe in myself for sure i

01:20:57.220 don't know about will smith or mark walberg but it'd be nice marky mark though man mark that was 0.65

01:21:01.480 a throwback that was a calvin klein grabbing crotch marky mark do you think moving down to

01:21:06.120 the island not focusing so much on vlog type content slash video type stuff which is very

01:21:11.600 time intensive right takes a lot of time notes editing back and forth that kind of thing and now

01:21:16.540 focusing on a little bit less you're still busy still have a lot going on but it's not necessarily

01:21:22.280 logan paul hand touches everything right as far as you're still involved in everything but you're

01:21:27.940 not directing someone to do everything perfectly right you built out the team a little bit more

01:21:33.700 do you think that the time that you've now gained has allowed you to kind of have more reflection

01:21:38.900 your person doesn't you reflect but not endlessly you're often looking forward ironically the team

01:21:45.080 now is like this like i think the leanest that it's ever been believe it or not i think your

01:21:49.200 hands probably touching more intimately now than it than it has in a while i mean here on the 0.88

01:21:53.500 ground with bro it's fucking me and kevin like yeah kevin's actually kevin's become my little 0.96

01:21:57.620 brother he fucking travels around the world with that kid perfect skin by the way he's great he's 0.99

01:22:02.820 in there he's over there skin yeah kevin say something you want to come out can you take 0.99

01:22:08.280 He's controlling the panels.

01:22:11.160 You know, Mike Posner used to like taking his shirt off on tour.

01:22:14.180 It was his big standout moment.

01:22:16.200 No matter what.

01:22:17.300 Speaking of the crew, I have a little complaint I want to make.

01:22:20.840 I don't think the boys know how to close.

01:22:23.520 Oh, my God.

01:22:25.360 Can we talk about this?

01:22:26.940 I don't think the boys know how to close it.

01:22:28.340 I'm starting to get worried about it.

01:22:29.520 Kevin and you.

01:22:33.960 I'm actually impressive Caleb.

01:22:35.600 I'm not going to lie. 1.00

01:22:36.040 This guy is a fucking monster. 1.00

01:22:37.340 I'm impressed with Caleb. 1.00

01:22:38.940 I'm impressed with Caleb.

01:22:40.720 Caleb knows how to have boots on the ground.

01:22:42.800 Like he, I have videos.

01:22:44.060 I've literally had videos of him just making out with girls at the bar.

01:22:46.720 Yeah, but also at the same time, I just feel like these kids also have like,

01:22:49.940 they just all have really big like hearts too.

01:22:52.180 They're just.

01:22:53.300 Innocent.

01:22:54.300 Yeah, you know, they're kind of pure.

01:22:55.980 Like Mac loves the idea of shrinking up a conversation,

01:22:58.940 really creating a little bit of like a longer lasting.

01:23:01.740 This is, it's beautiful.

01:23:03.040 It's not something to be.

01:23:04.900 You guys need to learn how to close.

01:23:06.160 yeah it's a window of opportunity man like actually you you had you had multiple options

01:23:10.900 yesterday i mean you could hold on okay okay okay hold on okay you're assuming that i wanted to

01:23:16.400 close but that's where we're getting hold on a second no we're not there was a point in the

01:23:20.260 night where you said the following statement you said me i suppose yeah i think even ray charles

01:23:28.120 was like i see what's going on here brah you're not closing that was earlier in the night was it

01:23:33.340 not to have max back if it's really your wife do you want to have that type of interaction with

01:23:39.240 her on the first or second or third night like you got to work there's entire conversations around

01:23:42.960 this yeah you know what i'm saying like you're gonna sleep with your wife on the first night

01:23:46.840 do you think i don't think so you think personally no really yeah i don't think so what if the sparks

01:23:51.880 fly do you know she's an innocent girl you've seen it through time she's not one to like slip 0.93

01:23:59.360 into dicks like she's like yo this is a picnic i think it's tough whoa how did i end up inside 0.99

01:24:07.340 this cock and it's not the first one i've slipped into many dicks before it let me say this i can 0.99

01:24:14.560 say this from from looking back anytime that's ever happened yeah it has not worked out got it 0.99

01:24:19.620 because clearly i'm not married okay so based on statistics based on statistical logical analysis

01:24:26.040 as Logan Paul might like.

01:24:28.320 It has happened.

01:24:29.320 I don't know.

01:24:29.600 I don't think so.

01:24:30.480 I think I'll meet her.

01:24:33.500 I think it'll develop over time.

01:24:35.960 Friendship.

01:24:36.540 I would prefer to foster a friendship

01:24:38.020 before it becomes intimate

01:24:38.980 so it's not predicated on physicality.

01:24:42.200 Have you had regular dates

01:24:43.700 without sleeping on the first night?

01:24:45.040 Absolutely.

01:24:45.460 And you're not married?

01:24:47.520 I'm 26, man.

01:24:48.640 That's what I'm saying.

01:24:49.320 Your theology there doesn't make sense.

01:24:52.320 Ideology.

01:24:52.800 One thing I will say is,

01:24:54.440 and once again to back back on it is any girl that i've ever had like pretty substantial feelings

01:24:59.500 for or a desire to move into any kind of longer lasting relationship with have i would say i think

01:25:06.560 a hundred percent ben girls that made me wait past the first three or four nights

01:25:11.140 that's it you're kevin uh yeah yeah but that could be that could be over the course of you

01:25:17.740 know two three weeks four weeks a month like i don't mean i don't mean like seeing them in

01:25:21.540 four nights in a row i mean phone calls in the middle like it could be two weeks to a month i

01:25:26.080 guess that counts what is the what is the uh the start date for this because my window was always

01:25:30.700 30 days i was if you want to be my girlfriend yeah right like i want you to command respect

01:25:35.580 for me like smart to not let me sleep with you in the first 30 days my recommendation and there's

01:25:40.760 whole i mean there's probably whole call or daddy episodes about this and and a million other shows

01:25:44.880 i mean that i could i could see men getting impatient a little bit prior to that period

01:25:50.600 seems a little long but does the time off uh like in between maybe texting you're not together

01:25:56.860 does that count do are you including uh blowies or old fashions or otpg should i be otp no i wasn't

01:26:05.260 i wasn't i wasn't i wasn't just sex so you're talking about actual penetrate like okay so 0.97

01:26:10.820 they can give you blowies like maybe two weeks in big time yeah got it got it yeah that changes 0.75

01:26:15.180 the game i've always you know i've always that's always been another interesting point like how

01:26:19.320 how girls categorize or guys categorize, you know, uh, OTP,

01:26:23.260 HJs or blowies. 1.00

01:26:24.440 Yeah. 1.00

01:26:25.580 Reach around.

01:26:26.580 What's the, um, what's the, if, cause, cause, okay.

01:26:29.520 I say that, but like rim jobs, I only mean penetration, you know,

01:26:33.620 like if some, if someone were to give me a rim job,

01:26:35.440 I wouldn't find that problem after that sentence,

01:26:42.480 the way you laughed afterwards with your legs in there look like you were 1.00

01:26:48.380 getting a rim job too i was um i slept with bell technically on the first date but it she says it

01:26:56.640 was the it was the second date because i was like oh this is a date and she's like not a date but

01:27:00.140 she claims that the first one was a date how long had you been talking though we were friends first

01:27:04.200 so how long i knew everything about her see the difference for how long for how long uh good two

01:27:09.520 months good two months but like friends that we hang out every single day i watched all of my

01:27:14.640 friends try to smash and get rejected oh my god i saw the line see that's what i'm saying if

01:27:20.020 there's so much like like sexual chemistry and you've been friends for a second like that maybe

01:27:25.340 that first night does erupt like it ends major sparks that's not first night that's that's like

01:27:32.280 ah oh that's a good point too that's a good idea that's a good idea that's a good idea okay so

01:27:38.980 you're saying so okay so she was your friend and then you guys wanted her first date the rules

01:27:43.660 don't apply anymore

01:27:44.380 because it's not the first time

01:27:45.280 you spend time with her.

01:27:46.080 You're saying the first time

01:27:47.500 you spend time with her.

01:27:48.340 I agree with that. 1.00

01:27:49.160 If a girl was like, 1.00

01:27:51.000 oh my God, 1.00

01:27:51.600 what's your name?

01:27:52.280 George?

01:27:52.680 That's so funny. 0.99

01:27:53.260 You were going to name Guetigas? 1.00

01:27:54.500 Let me suck your dick. 1.00

01:27:55.600 Okay, then I'll be like, 1.00

01:27:56.620 all right,

01:27:57.260 maybe she belongs to the street. 1.00

01:27:58.580 So I agree. 1.00

01:27:59.240 No, fuck that. 1.00

01:27:59.880 Or even worse, 1.00

01:28:01.020 the ones that ask you afterwards,

01:28:04.780 do you even know what my name is?

01:28:09.620 Lifestyle's over for you, Mike.

01:28:10.320 And a couple times I've been like,

01:28:12.160 I actually don't.

01:28:13.180 I'm so sorry.

01:28:14.600 I'm so sorry. 0.83

01:28:16.920 There's got to be no worse feeling in the entire fucking world than that scenario for 0.82

01:28:25.840 both people, for both people involved. 0.99

01:28:28.300 There's a girl out there right now that knows that I lost my virginity to her. 0.67

01:28:34.080 I do not know what this girl looks like or what her name is.

01:28:38.360 That's crazy.

01:28:39.200 That's nuts.

01:28:39.840 I do not remember.

01:28:40.180 Hold on.

01:28:41.080 That's hot.

01:28:41.180 How crazy is that?

01:28:42.000 I just thought about this the other day.

01:28:43.180 because somebody brought up their first time

01:28:44.400 and they were,

01:28:44.820 I know everything that happened.

01:28:46.320 Were you sleeping?

01:28:46.780 I remember where we were at.

01:28:48.080 No, I got my heart broken.

01:28:49.740 The girl that I was with for like on and off

01:28:51.980 for eight years of not being her boyfriend,

01:28:53.720 but we're going to wait until we're married.

01:28:55.800 She hooked up with my best friend 1.00

01:28:57.640 and I found out because I memorized her number

01:29:00.320 and my phone died.

01:29:01.160 So I typed it into his phone.

01:29:02.180 You still remember it now?

01:29:03.200 Yeah, it was under name Paris. 0.99

01:29:04.760 And I was like, what the fuck? 0.99

01:29:06.060 My heart dropped 0.99

01:29:06.840 and I went to click like send new message.

01:29:08.740 And when I read the messages,

01:29:10.100 it destroyed me.

01:29:11.180 So I immediately went to the nearest hookah bar.

01:29:13.180 because i'm middle eastern and i wasn't 21 and i was like i'm gonna hook up with the girl tonight

01:29:18.880 i'm gonna hook up i'm gonna hook up i'm gonna hook up this is like a kid serious i'm gonna

01:29:24.520 hook up with this girl tonight and uh and dude you know right you know right should i tell people 0.98

01:29:30.560 where i had sex yeah yeah uh there's a police park i swear to god seems like the best place 0.98

01:29:36.220 to do it there's a police park right next to my house so i had sex in the parking lot and i was 0.98

01:29:40.660 like okay this is a little risky and then i was like wait a second they have a volleyball

01:29:45.420 sand place i was like it's four o'clock in the morning three o'clock in the morning 0.99

01:29:48.760 i go let's go have sex hold on you're you're you're gnarly dude how old were you i didn't 0.99

01:29:53.460 know this i was 19 years old oh this is how you lost your virginity yeah and you're commanding 0.99

01:29:59.080 this girl to a sandbox out well yeah yes yes because by the way she had like in the moment

01:30:04.340 i told her afterwards but in the moment she thought i was like because remember i had phone 0.99

01:30:08.440 sex and i was a virgin so when me and my girl were talking i would google shit to like please 0.98

01:30:13.100 women so i'll be like yo i'm gonna do this this and that so i learned a lot so i wasn't just like 0.99

01:30:17.640 masturbating to porn i was like american i knew what i was doing so like you know what i'm saying 0.99

01:30:21.280 like one of those movies search boobs quick so i'm having sex with this girl i'm doing and i learned 0.99

01:30:26.100 like okay if i'm about to not like just breathe in talk dirtier play with her like i learned how 1.00

01:30:30.140 to last long wow so 45 minutes in my first time having sex whoa i brought her to the volleyball 1.00

01:30:35.520 of course 1.00

01:30:36.340 and I thought

01:30:37.060 it was gonna be like

01:30:37.660 Sandy 1.00

01:30:37.960 oh we're gonna fuck 1.00

01:30:39.020 kinda on the beach 1.00

01:30:40.160 this shit was gravel 0.99

01:30:41.640 kind of like the gravel 1.00

01:30:42.940 that you rode your bike on

01:30:44.140 but like

01:30:45.020 it was like

01:30:45.580 my knees were bleeding

01:30:46.980 you just did a callback

01:30:48.220 from a different episode

01:30:49.120 and the whole time 0.98

01:30:51.200 I was having sex with her 0.97

01:30:52.100 I kept getting nervous 0.99

01:30:53.180 like is there a cop

01:30:54.460 about to pull up here

01:30:55.520 or is there gonna be people

01:30:56.680 so I was always just like

01:30:57.640 kind of like

01:30:58.020 on the lookout

01:30:58.740 my whole memory

01:31:00.840 was based off of like

01:31:01.840 yo get in get out

01:31:02.860 and I remember

01:31:03.560 my condom breaking

01:31:04.460 that was a huge

01:31:05.200 That happened to me on my first time as well.

01:31:06.860 What?

01:31:07.620 Why is that such a common thing?

01:31:09.480 Because I think what happens is, in that situation, I was so nervous and there was dust and I kept pulling out to check.

01:31:16.060 It got dry.

01:31:17.020 The condom got dry.

01:31:17.660 Well, yeah. 1.00

01:31:18.060 I mean, it's a little bit easier for a condom to get dry when you have gravel in the girl's vagina. 1.00

01:31:22.260 True. 1.00

01:31:22.560 You are fucking rocks. 1.00

01:31:23.960 Pop the condom. 1.00

01:31:25.860 It scares the shit out of me. 1.00

01:31:26.840 Who's the fucking girl, George? 1.00

01:31:28.000 No, no. 1.00

01:31:28.260 I still don't know who the girl is.

01:31:29.520 So, listen.

01:31:30.160 So, I go home.

01:31:30.740 I go home and I tell my dad.

01:31:32.360 My dad's watching TV in the middle of the night.

01:31:34.120 This can't be possible.

01:31:34.860 I swear to God.

01:31:35.820 George, hold on. 0.70

01:31:36.660 Where did you find the girl between being at the hookah bar?

01:31:41.020 She was just there and then what? 0.95

01:31:42.400 You said, hey, shuddy.

01:31:43.260 Oh, so I was just talking to her. 0.98

01:31:45.340 So since I always talk to women, you know this about me.

01:31:48.040 I'm very, I don't make up games.

01:31:49.200 I don't like to play the story.

01:31:50.140 So I went up to her and I was like, hey, you know, this is my life.

01:31:52.140 And I told her about my best friend, just cheated.

01:31:54.360 So I was making her laugh.

01:31:55.480 And I was like, you know, it'd be a great slap in her face.

01:31:58.920 And she said, what? 1.00

01:31:59.780 I said, you should have sex with me. 1.00

01:32:01.860 And she says, okay, get in my car. 1.00

01:32:03.500 Oh my God.

01:32:04.280 We just got out of my car.

01:32:05.360 Actually, baller. 1.00

01:32:06.060 Baller's fuck. 1.00

01:32:07.060 So it was a pity fuck or a spite fuck, 1.00

01:32:09.460 and I don't remember who it is, 0.99

01:32:10.560 but I remember this is the only thing

01:32:12.060 that I vividly remember.

01:32:13.660 I thought I got this. 1.00

01:32:14.820 Dead ass. 1.00

01:32:15.300 What? 1.00

01:32:16.440 Dead ass. 1.00

01:32:17.540 Oh, no, but her ass was fucked. 1.00

01:32:19.200 That's why I said dead ass. 1.00

01:32:23.180 I walked home and I opened the door. 1.00

01:32:25.380 My face is white, bro. 1.00

01:32:27.700 And I was like, dad, I just had sex with a girl. 0.99

01:32:30.620 And my dad pauses the TV and looks at me and goes, 0.99

01:32:33.640 because he was so upset

01:32:35.520 because I told him

01:32:36.020 I was waiting

01:32:36.360 until I was married

01:32:37.020 and he got so mad at me

01:32:38.880 he's like

01:32:39.140 what do you mean

01:32:40.300 you're waiting to marry

01:32:41.180 I go

01:32:41.940 yeah I want to save

01:32:42.780 my virginity 0.79

01:32:43.560 he goes 1.00

01:32:43.840 what the fuck 1.00

01:32:44.480 you mean save 1.00

01:32:45.000 what are you going to lose 1.00

01:32:45.900 you have a dick 1.00

01:32:46.340 he's like 1.00

01:32:46.880 you're not going to lose

01:32:47.440 anything man

01:32:48.060 he was

01:32:48.580 he like you know

01:32:49.600 got mad at me

01:32:50.120 he wanted me to run away

01:32:50.880 so finally I came up to him 0.99

01:32:52.500 and I told him I had sex 0.92

01:32:53.380 and I was like 0.99

01:32:54.040 the condom broke

01:32:54.820 and doesn't even look

01:32:55.820 I'll never forget

01:32:56.360 doesn't look at me

01:32:57.400 he's looking this way

01:32:58.680 I'm right here

01:32:59.280 and he goes

01:33:00.040 did you come

01:33:01.280 I said

01:33:03.080 I go

01:33:03.920 no

01:33:04.740 I didn't come

01:33:05.840 because I was like

01:33:06.440 I just

01:33:07.240 you know

01:33:07.560 I did it

01:33:07.920 he goes

01:33:08.320 he just continues

01:33:09.280 to play his thing

01:33:10.000 he goes 1.00

01:33:10.280 then shut the fuck up George 0.99

01:33:11.660 he's like 1.00

01:33:12.840 you're good

01:33:13.280 I don't want to hear

01:33:13.860 about this again

01:33:14.580 and then

01:33:15.220 I'm walking to my room

01:33:16.760 still doesn't look away

01:33:17.700 he goes

01:33:18.120 I'm proud of you

01:33:19.380 and I was like

01:33:22.840 alright

01:33:23.520 I love that

01:33:25.460 I love that

01:33:26.680 I'm proud of you

01:33:27.280 do you think

01:33:27.880 do you think he did that

01:33:29.120 that moment

01:33:29.820 like he clearly

01:33:30.380 didn't look at you

01:33:31.060 because he wanted to be

01:33:31.840 some sort of

01:33:32.560 Godfather Scarface type kid.

01:33:35.280 Do you think when you're a dad,

01:33:37.340 you're going to act all cool

01:33:38.580 so your kid can have these stories?

01:33:40.940 I hope so, man. I actually get scared that I'm not

01:33:43.280 going to be what my father was to me.

01:33:45.020 No shot. He was such an animal, 0.92

01:33:47.380 bro. Animal. All of my 0.92

01:33:49.140 stand-up jokes are based off of him. 0.99

01:33:51.000 People come up to me like, is this shit true? 0.99

01:33:53.080 I go, ask him because he comes to my show. He goes, 1.00

01:33:55.020 no, it's true, man. I swear to God.

01:33:57.340 He doesn't know how to fucking swear properly, bro. 0.99

01:33:59.220 You know how cute that is? When he's fighting 0.99

01:34:01.160 a gangbanger at a liquor store goes I drop you like

01:34:03.140 hot potato like 0.93

01:34:04.040 stop talking I can't I just

01:34:07.120 still can't get over the story you just told

01:34:08.660 I don't I just it breaks my heart

01:34:10.900 no it's not even all that it's not the forgetting it's the

01:34:13.200 rolling around in a

01:34:15.120 pit of volcanic ash

01:34:16.600 under a volleyball net in a police

01:34:19.080 car parking lot it's a park where 0.95

01:34:21.100 the police with a random hookah girl and 1.00

01:34:23.080 and even worse 0.97

01:34:24.000 I was just I

01:34:27.180 hate that yeah I hate to hear that you guys

01:34:29.100 had to have your first experience with that was the

01:34:31.080 That's the only girl I didn't use a condom with. 0.98

01:34:32.900 That you did or didn't? 1.00

01:34:33.840 Didn't.

01:34:34.380 Well, you did until the gravel tore it.

01:34:37.800 Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

01:34:39.100 Oh, I intentionally used a condom.

01:34:40.840 Nothing against condoms, but I mean, in all honesty, like, you know. 1.00

01:34:43.680 By the way, if you use a condom and it starts feeling good, that shit broke. 1.00

01:34:47.140 Yeah. 1.00

01:34:48.480 I didn't know, Logan.

01:34:49.660 I never had sex. 1.00

01:34:50.420 I thought it was like, okay, 13 minutes in, you feel shit. 1.00

01:34:52.620 Like, I don't know. 0.99

01:34:53.360 The only reason I say it is just because, like, you know, for me, the first girl I had sex with was my girlfriend.

01:34:58.120 and so we didn't use a condom

01:34:59.940 because it wasn't a random hookup.

01:35:01.240 We had sex all the time.

01:35:03.000 So it was just the first time we had sex.

01:35:04.540 So I just can't imagine that first time 0.97

01:35:06.980 your condom would dance. 0.94

01:35:07.400 Is there a you didn't come like... 0.99

01:35:09.300 There's a little Georgie out there? 0.83

01:35:10.520 Uh-uh.

01:35:10.860 I just...

01:35:11.700 His name's Guregas.

01:35:14.720 I just farted so...

01:35:17.440 I farted.

01:35:18.840 Have you ever had that?

01:35:19.620 Or it was an unexpected laugh

01:35:21.040 and you just fart? 1.00

01:35:22.080 Shit your pants. 1.00

01:35:23.540 Have you guys ever shit your pants? 1.00

01:35:24.660 We're done. 0.99

01:35:25.120 It's over.

01:35:25.720 All right.

01:35:26.740 Hey, well, you know what, man?

01:35:27.740 thanks for watching guys

01:35:29.120 I really appreciate it now

01:35:30.240 that I have a stake

01:35:31.000 in this company

01:35:31.500 so please keep watching

01:35:32.980 and like and subscribe

01:35:34.900 well am I not

01:35:36.560 am I not supposed to

01:35:37.340 go for it

01:35:37.960 yeah well thanks

01:35:38.780 and you know

01:35:40.320 tell your friends about this guys 1.00

01:35:41.360 dude say the fucking words 1.00

01:35:43.080 like and subscribe 1.00

01:35:44.180 yeah

01:35:44.500 that's not that man

01:35:45.440 thanks so much for watching

01:35:46.400 thanks so much for watching

01:35:47.600 and uh

01:35:48.940 Philanthropist

01:35:49.740 George thanks so much

01:35:51.240 for watching what

01:35:52.200 Impulsive

01:35:53.000 the number one podcast 0.99

01:35:54.840 in the fucking world 0.99

01:35:57.740 Lisa, tell them about our new show 0.99

01:36:12.220 We have a new podcast

01:36:13.600 It's called Don't Lie to Me

01:36:15.100 I'm Lexi Iwanu

01:36:16.360 We're two best friends

01:36:17.560 22 years apart

01:36:18.760 But so close at heart

01:36:20.200 And I'm Lisa DiGiulio

01:36:21.740 The old one

01:36:22.640 Which means we have wildly different references

01:36:24.720 Occasionally different opinions

01:36:26.080 and at this point in my 50s i've lived it all now in my 30s being the founder of new shoes

01:36:31.940 good taste is my business listen on the iheart radio app apple podcasts or wherever you get

01:36:37.900 your podcasts i'm hamza and i'm martin and we're the hosts of out of character the funniest podcast

01:36:45.120 in the entire world i like that it's a good way to promote ourselves we are two funny guys having

01:36:53.640 fun enjoying ourselves and we just know how to have fun unlike anyone else if you guys like

01:36:58.600 fun conversations hot takes what else not too hot just kind of lukewarm take to get your mind

01:37:05.080 thinking a little bit listen out of character on the iheart radio app apple podcast or wherever

01:37:09.900 you get your podcasts hi this is kylie breakman angela geritana jeremy colhane patrick mcdonald

01:37:15.380 and we're the hosts of the artists on artists on artists on artists podcast the improvised

01:37:19.920 character comedy podcast where each week a new panel of artists discuss their craft join us for

01:37:25.860 a panel of eurovision participants and we do a little halloween sometimes does the pope dress up

01:37:31.720 he he winks on halloween it's right up next to the microphone you can i hear you can almost hear

01:37:37.460 the eyelashes hit each other you never seen italy so quiet as when the pope gets up to wink on

01:37:43.400 halloween listen to artists on artists on artists on artists every thursday on the iheart radio app

01:37:48.660 Apple Podcasts or wherever you get

01:37:50.600 your podcasts. I'm Lacey

01:37:52.420 Mosley, author, actor, stand-up comedian,

01:37:54.600 creator, and host of Scam Goddess

01:37:56.460 Podcast, the true crime comedy

01:37:58.340 podcast all about robbery, fraud,

01:38:00.620 and those who practice it. Each week I bring

01:38:02.540 on an amazing guest. Ooh, I scammed

01:38:04.700 them. What? I could talk to you for an hour.

01:38:06.880 You're a generational yapper, like me.

01:38:08.880 That's why I had to make yapping a job.

01:38:10.880 And now you can catch full episodes

01:38:12.420 of my show on YouTube. Start

01:38:14.400 listening to Scam Goddess on the iHeartRadio

01:38:16.660 app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever

01:38:18.440 you get your podcast.

Impaulsive with Logan Paul - December 28, 2021

E307 Never Sleep With Her On The First Date

Episode Stats

Transcript