Impaulsive with Logan Paul - Jeff Wittek Joins IMPAULSIVE, Logan Paul Reveals Shocking UFO Video, Suing Nate Diaz

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00:00:30.920 Lisa, tell them about our new show.

00:00:33.460 We have a new podcast.

00:00:34.880 It's called Don't Lie to Me.

00:00:36.260 I'm Lexi Iwanu.

00:00:37.420 We're two best friends, 22 years apart, but so close at heart.

00:00:41.400 And I'm Lisa DiGiulio, the old one, which means we have wildly different references,

00:00:46.000 occasionally different opinions.

00:00:47.240 And at this point in my 50s, I've lived it all.

00:00:49.820 Now in my 30s, being the founder of New Shoes, Good Taste is my business.

00:00:55.300 Listen on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

00:01:00.000 Hi, this is Kylie Brakeman,

00:01:03.760 Angela Jaritana,

00:01:04.700 Jeremy Culhane,

00:01:05.400 Patrick McDonald,

00:01:06.340 and we're the hosts of the Artists on Artists on Artists on Artists podcast.

00:01:10.140 The Improvised Character Comedy Podcast,

00:01:12.160 where each week a new panel of artists discuss their craft.

00:01:16.000 Join us for a panel of Eurovision participants.

00:01:19.060 And we do a little Halloween sometimes.

00:01:21.280 Does the Pope dress up?

00:01:22.640 He winks on Halloween.

00:01:24.900 He gets right up next to the microphone.

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00:01:35.060 Listen to Artists on Artists on Artists on Artists every Thursday on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

00:01:42.540 I'm Lacey Mosley, author, actor, stand-up comedian, creator, and host of Scam Goddess Podcast, the true crime comedy podcast all about robbery, fraud, and those who practice it.

00:01:52.580 Each week I bring on an amazing guest.

00:01:54.460 Ooh, I scammed them.

00:01:55.660 What?

00:01:56.120 I could talk to you for an hour.

00:01:57.520 You're a generational yapper, like me.

00:01:59.560 That's why I had to make yapping a job.

00:02:01.680 And now you can catch full episodes of my show on YouTube.

00:02:04.920 Start listening to Scam Goddess on the iHeartRadio app,

00:02:07.900 Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

00:02:10.880 Scam Goddess! 0.98

00:02:12.740 You know why it's annoying?

00:02:13.600 I'll say it.

00:02:14.060 Because I was supposed to fight Nate.

00:02:15.140 He goes and fights my little brother instead.

00:02:16.820 And then chokes out my lookalike in the street.

00:02:19.020 I'm just doing this for a couple weeks so then I could leave and clickbait while I left impulsive.

00:02:22.820 You have the only video

00:02:26.200 That proves that aliens exist

00:02:28.400 And you're not showing it to anybody

00:02:29.920 I'll show you one thing

00:02:30.760 I'll spill the beans 1.00

00:02:32.060 Holy

00:02:33.220 Can you hear that?

00:02:42.120 Does my chewing come through?

00:02:43.900 What are you chewing on?

00:02:45.800 Yeah it's gross

00:02:46.400 You actually

00:02:47.360 The mic's picked that up?

00:02:48.500 Yeah of course

00:02:49.020 Can I get that side?

00:02:52.820 yeah man no how's that sound dude you're lucky you're even on this couch you should have to go

00:02:57.920 through the same things as everybody else behind the camera first then the sound guy then that's

00:03:01.960 not true that's not how this works that is no it's typically a ladder it's yeah you got it you

00:03:06.700 got to do certain things to make it to the next rung you have no initiation you have no idea what

00:03:11.360 i'm taking that shot i'll have that spot in a month listen to me listen to me you have no idea

00:03:16.660 what I had to do to get on this couch.

00:03:19.080 Oh, I know. 0.98

00:03:20.060 I know what you f***ing did. 0.97

00:03:21.880 Welcome back to Impulsive, 0.99

00:03:23.020 the number one blowjob podcast in the world.

00:03:25.160 Thank you guys for listening, 0.80

00:03:26.180 watching, viewing, and subscribing.

00:03:27.440 If you're not subscribed,

00:03:28.940 I mean, whatever, dude, whatever.

00:03:30.440 We just did a podcast with David Blaine.

00:03:33.340 Let me tell you something about that guy.

00:03:37.060 That's the sound effect.

00:03:38.240 If I had to make a sound effect?

00:03:40.540 Well, how do we say it like in a neat package way?

00:03:43.280 Evil.

00:03:43.860 No, no, no, no.

00:03:45.380 That's not how you say it.

00:03:46.260 witchcraft. I did ask him, I asked him if he was

00:03:48.060 a sorcerer by the demon, a demon

00:03:49.920 sorcerer. He said, he's not going to tell you. He laughed at me.

00:03:52.500 Yeah, of course he's not going to tell you. It's just he's so,

00:03:54.000 to get to that level of

00:03:55.740 superstardom, especially in the spaces that

00:03:57.860 he's in as an entertainer, entertainer of that

00:03:59.840 size, you have to be so

00:04:01.720 specific about so many

00:04:03.820 things, but we generally

00:04:05.920 don't see someone who's that specific,

00:04:07.900 and he, I'm going to be honest with you, he turned it into

00:04:09.740 him, David Siv. And David Siv.

00:04:11.880 Like, in Blainsiv. He came in there, just started

00:04:13.880 commandeering the set, but it was a great podcast.

00:04:15.700 The guys' magic tricks are best in class, best in the world.

00:04:20.080 But, yeah, we're here in Vegas.

00:04:21.320 We got Mike Malek on set and Jeff Witek.

00:04:24.000 Jeff Witek from the Jeff FM.

00:04:25.220 Thank you for having me.

00:04:25.780 Jeff FM.

00:04:27.220 Stuff to say.

00:04:28.120 Yeah, he got a show.

00:04:28.860 He has a show.

00:04:30.340 I'm just doing this for a couple weeks so then I could leave and clickbait that while I left impulsive.

00:04:36.200 That's good.

00:04:36.800 It's a good strategy.

00:04:37.900 It's been done.

00:04:38.700 It's been done many times, and it works.

00:04:40.920 By who?

00:04:41.680 Oh.

00:04:42.240 Well, you can make a real living for yourself, you know?

00:04:44.040 We've seen the model.

00:04:44.780 we've seen the model work you do you do something you stick with it you leave

00:04:47.940 make it a thumbnail it's a crazy game it's a crazy game well leave your emotions out of it 0.62

00:04:53.760 i want it can i can i recognize something i'm taking this show down to hell with me

00:04:58.720 no that's not true i'm just messing around no you're not that's the thing you say that and

00:05:05.120 everybody laughs i'm like oh he's so funny i was at dinner last night with logan and evan

00:05:09.420 and uh logan and evan were like dude jeff is like he's like well put together like pretty

00:05:14.680 soft-spoken like he seems like a

00:05:16.360 pretty straight shoe i go you

00:05:18.640 don't know this they're saying you have a dark dude

00:05:20.380 a dark side he is a dark side

00:05:22.840 he i said to him i said

00:05:24.620 the following sentence within

00:05:26.580 the next six months jeff wittick 0.82

00:05:28.680 will murder someone that 0.80

00:05:30.600 was i that's a actual 0.99

00:05:32.240 quote from my mouth

00:05:34.220 100 if you're in vegas

00:05:36.520 right now and want to take odds on that

00:05:38.260 put the house on it what makes you

00:05:40.520 what makes you say that he said he said

00:05:42.240 he's this is what he said he said 0.98

00:05:43.560 You're gonna kill someone 0.99

00:05:45.880 You're just waiting for the right moment 1.00

00:05:47.280 What the fuck? Why would you say that? 1.00

00:05:50.160 Are you getting mad at me? Do you want to do something physically?

00:05:52.620 Like violent?

00:05:54.000 No 0.99

00:05:54.280 It would be a shit time with so many cameras 0.98

00:05:56.500 I don't know why you're saying that Mike 0.96

00:05:59.340 I feel like you're actually putting that out there

00:06:00.980 Because you are the bad guy

00:06:02.540 And you want to put it all on me

00:06:03.940 And you see that I'm getting some good feedback

00:06:05.900 All my comments are like

00:06:08.320 You made Mike likable

00:06:09.840 Well okay

00:06:10.720 no you know you didn't do you want to know why because i'm still not likable so you've been 0.75

00:06:15.800 doing a pretty shit job but i do i do want to say this and i and in seriousness jeff's not

00:06:19.660 going to kill anyone i love the kid he i can't even say how much i love the kid let's cut to 0.96

00:06:24.100 six months i'm on death row i we were doing the podcast today with david blaine and uh jeff was 0.94

00:06:31.180 out you know gambling and doing whatever he was doing and he came back and when we finished the 0.98

00:06:35.120 show i was talking shit to him because that's what we do we talk shit to each other and he said you 0.99

00:06:39.520 know what it's really fucked up that you just said that to me because i got you a gift while 0.99

00:06:43.180 you were doing the podcast and i looked and he bought me this mac miller shirt yeah and and 0.86

00:06:50.460 you know i think people have this like assumption that like once you get a little bit of bread like

00:06:54.920 you don't appreciate things like this this i honestly really really really no leave that

00:07:01.820 alone for a second i really appreciate it cost me nothing could you just accept what i'm saying

00:07:07.480 to right now no it's weird when i know i know but i really want to say to you i i this it does mean

00:07:12.960 a lot to me i appreciate it was a very nice gesture very nice thought mac miller means a lot to me

00:07:17.060 everybody i think knows that and it was very nice bro thank you of course i saw the shirt i liked it

00:07:22.180 mac you know i used to cut his hair i can't it's crazy crazy yeah um i would never wear that type

00:07:28.300 of shirt i know you like things like shirts like that and stuff so i was like yeah michael love

00:07:32.300 this and i know you love mac he likes letters too like so many letters there's so many letters on

00:07:36.460 his outfit sometimes. Yeah, you gotta

00:07:38.500 do something about the way you dress, bro.

00:07:40.720 It's just because your age, because

00:07:42.360 when you wear a backward hat and graphic tees

00:07:44.660 at your age, I think it could rub

00:07:46.640 some people the wrong way. Yeah, and you're still wearing

00:07:48.640 skinny jeans and you're 40 years old.

00:07:50.980 It's 2023.

00:07:52.420 I gotta balance out the nice act, you know?

00:07:54.760 We gotta just fire off insults at you.

00:07:56.540 Yeah, kindness, it can only last

00:07:58.520 so long with Jeff, I feel like. It's not really

00:08:00.560 his brand. I'm gonna fucking kill someone. 1.00

00:08:02.600 That's what I'm talking about. That's good. 1.00

00:08:04.160 In six months.

00:08:06.460 There it is

00:08:07.420 So what do we do

00:08:08.460 You have a stylist 0.99

00:08:10.280 And you still ended up in a ribbed white tee

00:08:12.640 Dude you walked in there like 0.99

00:08:14.820 Everyone's gonna jerk off to this 0.98

00:08:16.260 25 bucks urban outfitters 0.96

00:08:18.760 25 bucks urban outfitters

00:08:19.960 Nice fitted tee

00:08:21.600 Old school simple

00:08:23.380 You guys have it so easy 0.99

00:08:24.980 You don't know what it's like to not be like fucking super good looking 0.99

00:08:28.040 You know what I'm saying 1.00

00:08:28.900 Bro you could come out of the closet

00:08:32.020 What are you talking about 1.00

00:08:34.860 You can come out of the closet wearing anything, and you'll still look good because of your fucking stupid, slicked-back hair and just overall demeanor, you know? 1.00

00:08:43.820 I'm a hair guy. 1.00

00:08:45.060 Yeah.

00:08:45.660 I mean, you're also a pirate now, which doesn't help, but.

00:08:49.240 Give me that side.

00:08:50.400 Now I'm insecure.

00:08:51.440 Oh.

00:08:51.800 Oh, actually, this would be the good side.

00:08:54.620 I'm going to find a way to get in there.

00:08:57.320 No, no, we did have dinner with Evan.

00:08:59.240 Yeah.

00:09:00.040 Old roommate, one of my best friends, Evan Eckenrode, also known as Dwarf Mamba.

00:09:04.860 Love that kid, dude.

00:09:05.820 Yeah, no, he's so great.

00:09:07.180 He's so great.

00:09:07.880 I don't come to L.A. often, but when I do, it's good to catch up with all the friends.

00:09:11.940 I know exactly where you're going.

00:09:13.380 We had an incident.

00:09:14.460 I'm so happy.

00:09:14.620 There was a little incident.

00:09:15.560 Where were we?

00:09:16.480 We were at the Cheesecake Factory.

00:09:17.740 You know I love to go there.

00:09:19.880 That was nice.

00:09:21.080 That was actually pretty smooth, dude.

00:09:23.640 And we were minding our business, and we see this family walk in.

00:09:27.500 There's so many of them.

00:09:28.400 So many people in this family. 1.00

00:09:30.140 There's a fucking mom, dad, cousins, aunts, kids. 1.00

00:09:32.760 the one kid has a Kermit the Frog 1.00

00:09:35.260 puppet on the hand, a dog, they had a dog

00:09:37.360 not on a leash

00:09:38.560 like Lassie Dog, not a small dog

00:09:40.780 just walking through the restaurant

00:09:41.760 Jimmy's stuck in the well, like real

00:09:43.640 at one point the two kids

00:09:47.200 damn near

00:09:49.420 unaccompanied come running 1.00

00:09:51.180 by our table and the kid with the 0.71

00:09:53.240 Kermit puppet hits me

00:09:55.360 like hard

00:09:56.800 the four year old assaults me

00:09:58.540 and you know, I don't know what to do

00:10:01.380 So, you know, I'd start playing with the kid.

00:10:03.420 I'd start, like, shadowboxing back, whatever.

00:10:04.920 His mom's, his aunt, whoever it was, was like, don't do that, don't do that, whatever.

00:10:07.900 And I started just, like, messing around with the kid, you know, having some fun.

00:10:10.260 I had a few dreams for me.

00:10:11.040 You're saying don't do that to you?

00:10:12.320 No, no, no, I got to say.

00:10:13.540 I wasn't hitting the kid.

00:10:14.300 I was just playing with him.

00:10:14.960 I was just like, hey, he was, like, hitting me back.

00:10:16.460 I was, like, you know, covering up in my shell, shadowboxing a little bit.

00:10:18.940 I just got to say, I don't believe she said that.

00:10:21.580 I don't believe she said that.

00:10:22.780 And I think it's an important part of the story. 1.00

00:10:24.480 I do not believe that she said fucking jack shit to the kid. 0.99

00:10:28.040 It was poor parenting or whatever her relationship to the kid was. 1.00

00:10:34.140 But since I was playful, I think she kind of let it slide.

00:10:37.900 And the older kid, like nine years old, kind of recognized me.

00:10:41.640 He's just getting into that age where he may catch a TikTok of mine or drink prime or something.

00:10:46.000 He knew who I was.

00:10:46.660 He's like, are you Logan Paul?

00:10:47.980 My friend does YouTube.

00:10:49.540 Do you think you can get him more subscribers?

00:10:51.340 And I didn't know what to say to this kid. 0.99

00:10:52.900 Obviously, I'm not going to fucking do that. 0.98

00:10:54.140 I have things to do. 0.98

00:10:55.400 And I look at Mike, you know, my counsel, and he nods at me.

00:10:58.940 So I tell the kid, I'm like, yeah, man, you know.

00:11:01.460 We're going to call YouTube right after this.

00:11:03.220 See what we can do.

00:11:03.980 Your boy is about to blow up.

00:11:05.840 We're going to connect with YouTube.

00:11:07.040 We're going to make sure he gets millions of followers.

00:11:08.580 And the kid's like, that's so great.

00:11:09.760 Thanks so much.

00:11:10.880 And then they go back to the table.

00:11:12.480 Now, always at the same time, man, how do we even tackle such a topic?

00:11:18.820 We've definitely talked about it on the show before.

00:11:20.340 One of the conversations we had with Evan at the table was.

00:11:23.580 oh yeah that's right he is very vocal and has a lot of merit in explaining how dwarf representation

00:11:31.400 is pun intended i don't know what else to say pigeonhole it's it's um almost looked over 0.99

00:11:40.440 fuck it's small fuck kevin hartside it's they've been pigeon no they've been pigeonholed they're 0.99

00:11:49.300 a marginalized group like a lot of marginalized groups who doesn't have like and is not getting 1.00

00:11:58.600 the respect that other marginalized groups are getting because they're vocal about being

00:12:02.580 marginalized and and let me give some context to that evan's evan's right and saying that like

00:12:08.820 dwarves nowadays in like hollywood and media and just in real life are often just like the butt of

00:12:13.740 the joke like he the conversation started because evan was was talking about how he's sick of

00:12:18.420 getting cast as an elf that just that specifically and very specific and he's he's mad at his agent

00:12:24.120 because his agent is just sending him roll the roles they're all just elf roles and he's like

00:12:27.840 getting mad about he's like you'll cast me as like a like like something that is not

00:12:31.560 has to do solely with my drug deal in kingpin i could see it i could see it evan could do it

00:12:37.980 he's the next score yeah we want you to play babo escobar in the next movie and uh and so he just

00:12:46.420 got done telling us this conversation about how like the the dwarf community has not gotten a

00:12:52.320 fair chance to not be just this one thing and that is made fun of and and used often in the context of

00:13:01.240 of being the joke anyways this kid these kids come back to the table and the family you know

00:13:07.980 we're having some banter and they're they're being really nice and then the the the little 0.98

00:13:12.720 the little punk the little fucker with the kermit puppet points at evan and he goes that one's small 0.98

00:13:19.940 so small small small small that one is small why is he so small and and evan evan turns to us and 0.99

00:13:26.800 he goes he just as a very matter of fact he goes so like what do i do in this situation like that's 0.99

00:13:32.560 what he says and i i said to him i go you gotta fuck this kid up i go i go bro i go you gotta 1.00

00:13:39.100 to go outside when they go out and you got to square up to this little motherfucker the same 1.00

00:13:43.400 weight class no literally and the nah evan evan is bigger for sure but and then the waitress came 0.97

00:13:48.940 over and she talked talked to us evan is solid muscle i picked him up he's a great party that

00:13:53.360 we had i put him on my shoulders and i was walking around with him yeah yeah he's solid muscle brick

00:13:58.240 but you've always been you guys have both been great to him you always gave him a good home and

00:14:02.380 you guys didn't like when people made any no no i had friends that came to film with you before

00:14:06.000 and they were like, yeah, I made a joke.

00:14:07.940 It was Jason, dude.

00:14:09.400 We talked about that before.

00:14:11.300 It wasn't intentional.

00:14:13.820 That's how we all...

00:14:15.000 I don't know.

00:14:17.320 No, no, no. I get it.

00:14:18.620 I get it.

00:14:19.440 I guess what I'm talking about 1.00

00:14:24.300 with dwarves not feeling 1.00

00:14:26.120 truly equals in society

00:14:28.300 is that no one is

00:14:30.000 speaking up for them.

00:14:31.620 No one's being vocal about demanding respect

00:14:34.560 like other marginalized groups are i don't know if there's like not enough of them because you

00:14:38.480 know dwarfism isn't isn't super popular i think it's like one in a thousand or something but um 0.98

00:14:43.520 yeah evan was we were in a little bit of a conundrum because this kid's being a fucking 0.99

00:14:47.480 asshole his parents don't have the wherewithal to have a raise their kid with some respect the kid 1.00

00:14:52.300 same kid who like is hitting strangers around the restaurant and then b say something while he's 0.99

00:14:56.800 being incredibly disrespectful to a stranger who obviously like has a condition that probably if

00:15:03.000 you use your brain and think about it for one second,

00:15:04.780 isn't the easiest to live with.

00:15:05.980 It affects his whole life.

00:15:07.080 So it was just an issue,

00:15:08.860 and so we did end up finding the kid in the parking lot.

00:15:11.360 Evan did jump him. 0.99

00:15:13.580 He'll never be saying that type of shit again 0.99

00:15:15.500 if he ever can talk again, to be honest. 0.99

00:15:17.700 No, but then the waitress came over,

00:15:19.020 and she kind of like saw what was happening,

00:15:21.100 and she comes over, and she's like,

00:15:22.740 wow, that was crazy.

00:15:23.800 They had a dog in here,

00:15:24.720 and the mom wasn't telling him to stop.

00:15:26.240 And she's like, you know,

00:15:27.280 what do you do about that kind of thing?

00:15:28.500 And we said, dude,

00:15:29.360 we're going to find him in the parking lot, 1.00

00:15:30.520 and we're going to beat the shit out of him. 0.99

00:15:31.800 Yeah, she was down. 0.98

00:15:32.460 do you want to know what she said she goes you really should you really should dude and that was

00:15:37.280 the moment where i was like dude you know what cheesecake factory is like it's like americana

00:15:42.120 dude yeah and by the way i found something out new about cheesecake factory last night

00:15:46.540 it has an egyptian theme surprise did you guys know that do you like headphones this episode

00:15:52.740 is sponsored by raycon let's face it with coffee starting at five dollars on our bank account

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00:16:57.760 slash Logan. Back to the show.

00:16:59.780 Did you know that there's Egyptian

00:17:01.580 faces? You saw it on

00:17:03.700 Mike's Snapchat? I saw it on Mike's Snapchat. Yeah, everyone else

00:17:05.840 did too, and so did we, because let me tell you something.

00:17:08.220 The guy won't stop

00:17:09.580 Snapchatting. Mike is an

00:17:11.800 addict at heart, and right now he's addicted to

00:17:13.800 Snapchatting. Where does it end? I'm a

00:17:15.840 food guy. I take pictures

00:17:17.980 of my food. Evan called him a mom

00:17:19.820 on vacation. Everything. This is Mike.

00:17:22.580 That boop

00:17:23.460 is how I earn 1.00

00:17:25.480 my money.

00:17:26.480 But with eating a meal.

00:17:27.120 I never asked you,

00:17:28.660 hey man,

00:17:29.060 why do you jump off

00:17:29.880 the top rope?

00:17:30.560 Hey man,

00:17:31.020 why are you always

00:17:31.460 trying to sell

00:17:32.000 bottles of liquid

00:17:32.900 to kids?

00:17:33.780 Why are you doing this?

00:17:34.760 Why are you doing that?

00:17:35.480 That's how I make 1.00

00:17:35.960 that fucking money. 1.00

00:17:36.660 That's how I make 1.00

00:17:37.080 that fucking mortgage. 1.00

00:17:38.000 I'm making a living. 1.00

00:17:38.720 Don't give me that shit. 1.00

00:17:39.220 Don't give me that fucking shit. 1.00

00:17:40.380 I'll take a break 1.00

00:17:40.780 until the fucking food 0.99

00:17:41.280 second. 1.00

00:17:41.520 You're taking out your phone.

00:17:42.900 You're taking out your phone.

00:17:43.440 You're taking out your phone. 1.00

00:17:45.360 That's fucking bullshit. 1.00

00:17:46.340 It's annoying. 1.00

00:17:47.560 You are good at debating, Mike,

00:17:49.020 because that was like

00:17:49.580 a good argument you made. 1.00

00:17:51.560 And it is some bitch ass shit 1.00

00:17:53.200 That you do with your phone out all the time 1.00

00:17:54.780 When there's people around 0.99

00:17:55.620 But you just fuck up for yourself good 0.99

00:17:57.400 Do you have Snapchat? 1.00

00:17:58.640 You've been taking Snapchats all fucking day 0.99

00:18:01.240 American Jeff on Snapchat 0.99

00:18:02.780 But I just do it myself and stuff

00:18:05.440 And I'll like

00:18:06.900 Objectify my own body 0.79

00:18:08.560 What'd you do before the show started today? 1.00

00:18:09.980 Not women 1.00

00:18:10.520 I don't know if it's

00:18:14.720 What did I do before the show?

00:18:16.620 I went to the gym and gambled

00:18:17.560 You took a selfie

00:18:18.640 With the three of us on the couch

00:18:21.040 You know what you called me the other day?

00:18:22.460 In front of a bunch of people on a private jet 0.98

00:18:24.620 I was like what the fuck am I even doing here 0.99

00:18:26.640 No not a pirate 1.00

00:18:27.760 You serve the same purpose as a hot girl 0.87

00:18:30.680 You bring no other value but you're like a hot girl 0.96

00:18:32.980 You don't even bring that much value 1.00

00:18:34.460 You know what sometimes I feel like a fucking NPC in your life 1.00

00:18:37.760 You look like an NPC 0.99

00:18:39.380 If I was going to craft a person in GTA 0.99

00:18:42.100 You would be exactly what they fucking look like 0.97

00:18:44.280 I get that a lot actually 0.99

00:18:46.260 Can I release a hot take

00:18:49.700 And I really

00:18:51.240 i'm just gonna say this and i'll maybe evan gets pissed off about it dude

00:18:56.080 there was a bunch of different terms that could have defined the community i feel like dwarves

00:19:04.580 was a bad selection i'm just gonna say it right now what would you prefer i like little people

00:19:09.100 there was a lot of also fair though it's equally as used it's just that dwarves to me when i think

00:19:16.100 I think of Snow White

00:19:17.220 And then they automatically

00:19:20.220 Become cartoonized based on

00:19:22.160 The term that was selected

00:19:23.720 Unbelievable you're doing it

00:19:25.400 No I'm not

00:19:28.300 I love Evan I will speak up for him

00:19:30.360 I believe he deserves the same amount of respect

00:19:32.060 And equality as anyone else

00:19:33.780 Who are you to say bro you're 8 feet tall 0.73

00:19:35.940 You're the worst guy to come up with

00:19:37.920 What do you think you're doing

00:19:39.160 Do you think you're going to do what I do

00:19:42.360 Better than me

00:19:43.100 You will never do what I do

00:19:44.900 For a foot

00:19:45.500 Don't you dare

00:19:46.460 Try to be the aggressor

00:19:47.500 On this show 0.99

00:19:47.900 Don't you fucking dare 0.99

00:19:49.660 See this is what 1.00

00:19:50.320 I was worried about

00:19:50.780 We're gonna clash

00:19:51.720 Cause we're all alphas

00:19:52.820 You know

00:19:53.440 I'm not an alpha

00:19:54.220 No you are bro 1.00

00:19:55.720 You're a fucking 1.00

00:19:56.420 Professional wrestler 1.00

00:19:57.360 How come you're not

00:19:57.800 Taking any shots at him 1.00

00:19:58.740 He's fucking jacked 1.00

00:20:00.640 You can take a shot at me 1.00

00:20:03.320 Make a joke 0.99

00:20:04.640 Make a joke

00:20:05.040 A controversy joke

00:20:05.960 Go ahead

00:20:07.760 I will

00:20:09.540 I'll get there

00:20:10.040 Maybe you know

00:20:11.040 Let me get a little

00:20:11.660 Comfortable

00:20:12.000 But he has

00:20:12.600 But you have his

00:20:13.320 He has your permission

00:20:14.820 to make a good...

00:20:15.700 You can roast me.

00:20:16.980 Bro, I'm not going to get offended.

00:20:18.240 I don't care.

00:20:19.800 Nah, it's...

00:20:20.380 Dude, you guys have been

00:20:21.540 a little sensitive

00:20:23.180 with the stuff I've said

00:20:24.220 in the past, you know?

00:20:25.980 Not...

00:20:26.300 I think that was when

00:20:26.960 you were on the other team, though.

00:20:28.500 Yeah, and also

00:20:28.920 did it behind our backs.

00:20:30.220 It was a war in factions.

00:20:30.860 I didn't do anything.

00:20:31.700 I didn't do anything.

00:20:32.640 You guys misunderstood,

00:20:34.320 and...

00:20:35.360 Did we ever talk about that?

00:20:36.340 Did we talk about this

00:20:37.180 on this show at all?

00:20:38.200 About how me and him,

00:20:39.200 what happened?

00:20:40.660 Okay, okay.

00:20:41.660 Listen.

00:20:42.620 You know what happened?

00:20:43.360 So when David went on, and I'll keep this quick, we were having this party, Logan's Luau, and he went on the set of Impulsive, and he made a joke about a controversy with Logan.

00:20:56.920 It was all whatever, whatever, and they had their situation.

00:20:59.640 Go ahead.

00:21:00.160 Quick context. 0.99

00:21:00.660 They snuck into the fucking podcast room behind our back while the party was going on outside. 0.99

00:21:05.120 No, your assistant took us in there. 1.00

00:21:06.660 My assistant, because they asked.

00:21:08.860 They asked Danny.

00:21:10.000 And it's David Dobrik.

00:21:11.160 They asked Danny where the podcast was.

00:21:13.400 They came to the party just to shoot this bit on my set making fun of me. 0.99

00:21:17.420 It was fucked up. 1.00

00:21:18.920 It wasn't, I'll be honest, fuck that kid. 1.00

00:21:21.200 He's my arch nemesis, you know. 0.99

00:21:23.160 But he just saw the cameraman and he was like, oh, are you the guy that filmed in Japan?

00:21:28.380 And that was.

00:21:29.780 That was all he said?

00:21:30.900 That was it.

00:21:31.720 And then we went to the set.

00:21:33.180 Then we went over to the set and that kid Nick, remember Nick from Vegas?

00:21:37.020 Yeah.

00:21:37.500 He was there and he was filming and he was like Snapchatting us.

00:21:40.100 And I used to do this Motivation Monday thing

00:21:43.300 Where I would completely contradict myself

00:21:44.980 And just go into a self-deprecating

00:21:46.800 Depression mid-motivational speech

00:21:49.040 So I was doing that

00:21:50.180 And he thought, or you thought

00:21:52.060 That I was making fun of the apology video 1.00

00:21:53.920 But I was just doing my normal stupid shit that I do 0.99

00:21:56.720 And then it all got twisted 1.00

00:21:58.440 And then you were like 1.00

00:21:59.660 Fuck Jeff Wittig, you wanna come fucking spar? 1.00

00:22:02.460 What's good? 1.00

00:22:03.480 What's good Jeff?

00:22:04.660 You wanna spar bro?

00:22:06.080 Yeah, and you didn't say that to David

00:22:07.200 You were just like me, you know?

00:22:08.360 Which is good, I like that, I respect that

00:22:09.700 Because you went after the, you know? 0.85

00:22:11.480 The other, the psychopath.

00:22:13.040 It was like in jail when you go up to the biggest, toughest dude 0.97

00:22:15.680 and you hit him first to establish dominance.

00:22:18.020 Yeah.

00:22:18.820 And I wasn't even the guy, but I was like, you know what?

00:22:21.160 All right, let's on. 1.00

00:22:22.160 Let's fuck you. 1.00

00:22:23.060 Finally, I got a beef. 1.00

00:22:24.280 I've been looking for one of these. 1.00

00:22:25.460 I love this shit. 1.00

00:22:26.640 And we talked it out and it, you know. 1.00

00:22:28.820 No, wait, what do you mean?

00:22:29.800 No, no, that's not where it ended.

00:22:31.400 The part I was going to bring up was.

00:22:32.880 Oh, yeah.

00:22:33.320 Then when it became a thing between you two,

00:22:35.380 Than you needed

00:22:36.940 Not needed 0.94

00:22:37.980 But there needed to be the psychopath

00:22:40.360 From your team involved

00:22:41.680 So before you know it

00:22:42.860 It went from being a Logan and David thing

00:22:44.660 To me and Jeff on FaceTime

00:22:46.060 Going crazy

00:22:47.120 And Jeff's like

00:22:48.460 Dude I don't

00:22:48.940 I really want to let you know this

00:22:50.640 I don't care about my life dude 0.99

00:22:52.360 Like if you want to fucking do this 0.98

00:22:54.200 We can do this 0.99

00:22:55.200 You said that?

00:22:55.960 No you did 1.00

00:22:56.540 I'll go back to fucking prison 1.00

00:22:58.220 I go bro 1.00

00:22:58.840 I don't know

00:22:59.640 I said we could share an ambulance 0.99

00:23:01.780 I don't give a fuck 0.99

00:23:02.660 And I said wherever you're going right now 0.99

00:23:04.380 I'm down to go to too

00:23:05.600 So if you want to 0.99

00:23:06.440 Fucking do this 1.00

00:23:07.080 Then let's fucking do it 1.00

00:23:07.880 And we had a moment 0.99

00:23:08.760 Yeah

00:23:09.140 And

00:23:09.660 And

00:23:10.100 It got to that boiling point

00:23:12.140 And then we somehow

00:23:13.620 Probably

00:23:14.020 It was him

00:23:14.920 It was

00:23:15.240 I remember it

00:23:15.880 Because

00:23:16.160 I found it very mature

00:23:17.760 He said

00:23:18.800 Listen

00:23:19.080 We can do this

00:23:20.520 Someone's gonna get hurt

00:23:22.100 Yeah it's gonna end

00:23:22.720 No it's gonna end badly

00:23:23.560 Someone's gonna end

00:23:24.540 Real badly

00:23:25.480 Probably for both of us

00:23:26.340 Someone's gonna actually

00:23:27.160 Get like really hurt

00:23:27.980 And I went 0.78

00:23:28.580 Damn like 0.94

00:23:29.160 He's actually right 0.99

00:23:29.820 Like we can do it

00:23:30.760 We can do this

00:23:31.500 But there's just no

00:23:32.760 Like real positive outcome

00:23:34.040 And I said it was a misunderstanding

00:23:35.500 So if you want to go that way

00:23:37.320 It's going to end bad for the both of us

00:23:38.720 But it's a misunderstanding

00:23:40.040 So what are we even doing

00:23:41.580 And then it was in that moment

00:23:43.360 During that fearsome argument

00:23:45.920 Where I was like dude you know what

00:23:47.140 I kind of like this kid

00:23:48.600 He seems kind of dope bro

00:23:51.220 And then after that we kind of built a friendship

00:23:53.960 And did a barbershop

00:23:55.200 And did the first Jeff FM

00:23:56.900 And it was off to the races

00:23:59.040 You guys should start a beverage company 0.95

00:24:02.360 that's yeah yeah that's good there could be some real we should fucking bare knuckle box did you 0.97

00:24:08.060 see uh bkfc who bare knuckle box a bear i've seen it i've seen it fighting championship it's insane 0.94

00:24:14.600 this past one that just happened was sick you see mcgregor was there he got in did a face off

00:24:18.940 whoa well you're talking you're talking about fighting stuff i mean if we're going to talk

00:24:21.960 about the fighting stuff we got to talk about ds okay hold on a second you you you do it however

00:24:26.380 you want but it's it's the topic well bare knuckle mike perry knocked out luke rockhold's 0.99

00:24:31.500 teeth and he he quit he was like nah fuck this this shit ain't for me a ufc fighter career you 1.00

00:24:36.520 have ex-champion yeah his teeth went flying and he was like fuck this shit yeah but then nate diaz 1.00

00:24:41.500 did that to logan's lookalike that's the part that i'm trying to get okay yeah yeah i just never 1.00

00:24:45.860 thought that looking like me would get you fast-tracked to getting guillotined on bourbon

00:24:50.360 street by professional mma fighter nate diaz i i get these texts one morning like yo you okay

00:24:58.100 is everything all right what's good and i wake up and open twitter to to see a video of my look 0.82

00:25:04.300 alike the guy who we had on this podcast hosted this show being fucking guillotine choked out 0.65

00:25:11.160 on bourbon street in new orleans or yeah new orleans yeah yeah by by by nate diaz like like 0.98

00:25:18.120 hands in the air guillotined and while nate was choking him he fucking gave him like two knees 0.94

00:25:23.680 to the ribs lets him go my lookalike again basically me just passes out on the street 0.97

00:25:29.380 KO'd knocked out unconscious I thought it was a bit when I first saw it I said they planned this

00:25:34.200 out as a promotion for Jake's fight I did not believe that this was a real thing and then I 0.79

00:25:39.580 started hearing yo homie was in the emergency room he had to get what like eight or nine staples 1.00

00:25:43.260 in the back of his head eight staples yeah so I've been I've been hitting him up I've been dying to

00:25:47.420 interview him you know and I got a little inside scoop he won't do the interview I think because 0.98

00:25:52.380 there's like legal stuff going on now but he so he went out there for the misfits fight i think

00:25:56.680 yeah yeah and he bought tickets but he was like i'm just gonna try and sneak in saying i'm logan

00:26:01.240 the whole time and it worked he got in because he looks that much like oh actually he looks a lot

00:26:05.200 like me yeah he got in he was like sitting ringside and then the fight happened with nate

00:26:10.400 and somebody else and then out i mean he was kind of approaching nate with his hands up and this is

00:26:14.800 a good move to just you know but but but in my eyes it looked like he was doing his hands up like

00:26:19.600 yo listen i just want to say this i'm not a threat like is that not what it looked like the issue was

00:26:23.840 he was walking towards him yeah like he was walking to and what you said i mean you can go

00:26:28.420 from here that's what i do when i'm about to fight somebody i'm like yo chill bro it's not worth it

00:26:31.820 bam trickery and then first shot whoever gets the first shot in a street fight has a way better

00:26:37.020 so i mean but it's nate diaz that's the thing and maybe maybe nate felt uh like he was in danger 0.97

00:26:43.800 or something but i reached out to the guy and i was like this is fucked up like it was actually

00:26:47.220 hard to watch um and i felt bad for him and he looks like me we got to protect our kind 0.69

00:26:51.260 and so i offered to to fund the lawsuit against nate diaz and so i i connected him with uh some

00:26:56.200 some legal counsel and i think he'll probably be walking away with a pretty healthy check

00:26:59.340 from wait so you're so that's why i won't do the interview so you're paying for his lawyers i

00:27:04.420 offered to and then it turns out the legal team we connected him with is taking the case pro bono

00:27:08.720 because it i mean i i would assume they think it's a takeaway like there isn't really much to

00:27:12.820 say about a professional mma fighter choked out a civilian with relatively zero combat no combat 0.97

00:27:19.560 experience i would bet that rodney his first of all his name's fucking rod rodney i would i and 0.96

00:27:25.420 just judging by having met him i don't think he's ever i think he has zero combat no no he has one 0.95

00:27:31.300 fight he's a blue belt in jiu-jitsu too professional one professional no no not professional no i think

00:27:36.660 he's a blue but i don't know anything about the fight that he had the one thing i think he won

00:27:40.920 It was like an influencer fight.

00:27:43.320 He has an actual boxing fight?

00:27:45.700 Yeah.

00:27:46.700 I don't know why.

00:27:47.740 Was it against fake KSI's lookalike?

00:27:50.920 That would have been so good.

00:27:53.100 That would have been so good.

00:27:53.820 Do you know who he fought?

00:27:55.240 I don't know.

00:27:56.700 So how does this, as of right now, how does this affect Diaz?

00:27:59.720 How does this affect LeBron's legacy?

00:28:01.020 No, that's already locked in.

00:28:03.380 How does this affect Diaz, Jake Paul?

00:28:06.160 You know, I was wondering that.

00:28:07.520 It's annoying

00:28:11.540 You know why it's annoying? I'll say it

00:28:13.500 Because I was supposed to fight Nate

00:28:14.740 I was supposed to fight Nate

00:28:16.080 He goes and fights my little brother instead

00:28:18.700 And then chokes out my lookalike in the street 0.88

00:28:20.740 You're a doppelganger 1.00

00:28:22.040 The fuck is that? 1.00

00:28:23.680 So weird 1.00

00:28:24.480 He's a bully 0.97

00:28:25.660 He's whack dude 0.98

00:28:28.120 But I don't think it affects it at all

00:28:31.140 I think the fight's going to go on

00:28:32.600 I think Jake's going to win August 5th

00:28:35.240 Which is crazy

00:28:35.840 because SummerSlam, WWE, is also August 5th,

00:28:40.500 which I don't know if I'm performing yet,

00:28:42.760 but if I am, and me and Jake are both doing these big events on one night,

00:28:46.800 August 5th, it's going to be a crazy night for the Pauls.

00:28:49.300 But Jake better win.

00:28:50.200 I better win, too.

00:28:51.220 I wanted you to face off against Diaz 1.00

00:28:53.400 after you bitched out of the Dennis fight. 0.98

00:28:57.440 Let me ask you something.

00:28:58.600 What? 1.00

00:28:58.880 Who the fuck do you think you are? 1.00

00:29:00.100 What do you mean? 1.00

00:29:00.780 You wouldn't sign the contract, bro.

00:29:02.140 You didn't want to get in the ring. 1.00

00:29:03.680 My fucking knee exploded. 0.99

00:29:04.260 You did not want to get in the ring with the phenom that is Dylan Davis. 1.00

00:29:08.480 Just admit it right fucking now, dude. 0.99

00:29:10.500 You are scared to fight Dylan. 1.00

00:29:11.840 Yo, Dylan, I swear to God, is replaying these last 25 seconds at his computer and just beating his meat, man.

00:29:18.880 No, he's going to turn it into something.

00:29:20.160 He's never been gassed up this much in his life by you, Mike.

00:29:23.600 He's an engagement specialist, really.

00:29:25.940 Dude, he's farming impressions.

00:29:27.920 He's a social media creator.

00:29:29.180 We'll do it one day, maybe.

00:29:30.700 So a fight still happens, Jake Paul and ATS.

00:29:32.380 is um that's that is what i would consider to be uh planetary link what do you say to me what

00:29:40.340 kevin what is it i feel like it's important what what what you were just talking about was what i

00:29:44.620 would consider to be planetary lingo okay very very uh terrestrial terrestrial okay cool dude 0.73

00:29:50.860 that all that shit we just talked about happened here on earth you have the only video that proves 1.00

00:29:58.500 that aliens exist you scumbag mother you have the only video that proves that there is life 1.00

00:30:05.680 outside of this fucking solar system and you're sitting on it and you're not showing it to 1.00

00:30:09.940 anybody true or false did you see it yet have you seen it i'm not going to talk about my my position 0.98

00:30:16.780 i asked kevin he said he's seen it kevin was there kevin was there helping me film it

00:30:23.000 Why can't you show anybody this?

00:30:25.300 I'll tell you why, Jeff.

00:30:27.500 Because it's not right.

00:30:29.500 What do you think?

00:30:30.200 Are you like the government?

00:30:31.180 Are you an Illuminati?

00:30:33.060 Are you worried about people going nuts?

00:30:36.560 That's got screenshotted and that's everywhere.

00:30:39.680 That's everywhere.

00:30:40.380 If the Illuminati's watching this, hit me up.

00:30:43.320 Hit me up because I have been waiting for the person in the hood to come.

00:30:45.520 I swear to God, I've been waiting for the high society to be like,

00:30:48.960 you're one of us.

00:30:49.940 What do they do?

00:30:50.540 Don't they come get you in the middle of the night

00:30:51.960 and take you to a camp or something?

00:30:53.200 And then I think they'd pull your pants on 1.00

00:30:54.500 and hit you with a stick in the butt. 1.00

00:30:55.740 Is that confirmed? 1.00

00:30:56.720 That's what I heard.

00:30:57.120 Okay, so Joe Rogan has evidently a person

00:31:01.800 that was on our podcast.

00:31:03.020 You don't remember James Fox? 0.99

00:31:03.640 Yeah, of course I remember fucking James Fox, bro. 0.97

00:31:05.740 It was a joke, but sometimes it was so long ago. 0.96

00:31:08.560 It was long.

00:31:09.200 300 episodes ago.

00:31:10.700 Brings James Fox on his show to talk about alien evidence,

00:31:14.100 so on and so forth.

00:31:15.060 And James Fox shares a previously unheard story

00:31:19.480 about you going to purchase this existing footage

00:31:24.180 of aliens landing on the earth for $100,000.

00:31:27.300 What was the guy's name that wouldn't sell it to you?

00:31:29.500 Chuck Clark.

00:31:30.260 Chuck Clark, who has been gatekeeping this footage 0.80

00:31:33.000 like a freaking OnlyFans girl,

00:31:35.640 would not sell you the footage for a rack of hundreds, right? 0.83

00:31:39.720 So you said, hey, man, do you mind just showing it to me?

00:31:42.940 And while he showed it to you, 1.00

00:31:44.700 you recorded it on a secret fucking camera. 1.00

00:31:47.940 What do you want from me, bro? 1.00

00:31:48.880 I'm a sneaky little fuck. 1.00

00:31:49.240 Oh, you stole the footage. 1.00

00:31:50.760 I'm a sneaky little fuck. 1.00

00:31:51.920 Oh, that's sick. 1.00

00:31:53.480 Damn. 1.00

00:31:54.160 I thought you just bought it like the Pokemon cards. 0.99

00:31:56.340 No, I tried it.

00:31:57.160 I offered him $100,000 for this tape after I had seen it.

00:32:03.680 Was it worth it?

00:32:04.640 Would it be worth $100,000?

00:32:06.180 Let me tell you this. 0.98

00:32:07.420 He should have fucking taken the money because I got the footage anyway. 0.98

00:32:11.080 And I'll tell you why I did that because it's a little twisted. 0.99

00:32:15.500 It's a little twisted of me to put on a small button camera

00:32:17.660 and go film UFO footage that isn't mine.

00:32:22.200 Here's the thing, though.

00:32:23.320 It's not his either.

00:32:25.000 It's not.

00:32:25.760 The people who shot it gave it to him

00:32:27.940 and expected that he would keep it hidden for himself.

00:32:32.700 It's not his footage.

00:32:34.140 He's keeping very, what I thought at the time,

00:32:38.320 important

00:32:39.300 UFO, alien, extraterrestrial

00:32:42.920 proof

00:32:44.320 in his possession and not showing it

00:32:46.240 like why?

00:32:47.840 I think that is doing a disservice

00:32:50.160 to the world.

00:32:52.600 Because you said you wouldn't share it?

00:32:54.840 Not going to do it for me.

00:32:56.060 Hold on a second. I'm not saying anything.

00:33:00.340 Rogan said the reason he's probably not sharing

00:33:02.460 is because it's probably Fugazi.

00:33:03.880 You know what I'm saying? So he's locking it down

00:33:05.760 just to build hype up.

00:33:07.040 no no no no chuck clark lives in a shack in the middle of nowhere it was the most

00:33:14.220 middle of nowhere i've ever been in my life you're from ohio

00:33:17.700 and so the guy's not the guy's not clout chasing or anything but um you know i i don't know yeah

00:33:27.440 a lot of people hit me up the most random like you know clouded people hit me up asking to see

00:33:34.260 this footage and um i don't know what roll the clip no i'm um i'm waiting i'm waiting you know

00:33:47.120 what i'm waiting for i'm waiting for the right moment i'm not afraid to release it i'm just

00:33:52.600 waiting for the right moment it's uh and it's i need a little more i need more i need more

00:34:00.560 See I don't want to fly with you

00:34:02.660 I feel like you're a risk right now

00:34:04.360 Like I feel like either the CIA

00:34:05.620 Or NSA or whatever

00:34:07.480 You know acronym

00:34:08.860 You know organization knows that you have this footage

00:34:12.000 They know you've been in contact with

00:34:13.820 Michael J. Fox

00:34:14.740 What's his name again

00:34:16.120 What was it

00:34:17.760 Jimmy Fox 1.00

00:34:19.500 And he fucking knows that you have this shit bro 1.00

00:34:23.140 Like I don't even want to be around you 1.00

00:34:25.060 Like it's not going to be the Illuminati

00:34:26.300 It's going to be agent 0.98

00:34:27.760 And if you get killed, then I post it right now. 1.00

00:34:30.660 So if anybody's watching, it's going to kill him. 0.99

00:34:32.120 No one's killing anyone. 0.97

00:34:33.560 That's the thing.

00:34:35.400 It's not that secretive.

00:34:37.120 Who cares?

00:34:38.080 Agent Mulder, you ever heard that name before?

00:34:40.860 Heard of Agent Priest?

00:34:43.520 I know you know who I am.

00:34:46.300 What's going on?

00:34:47.000 What did I get into here? 1.00

00:34:48.300 What the fuck? 0.99

00:34:49.580 Sorry, man. 1.00

00:34:50.280 You made a poor decision.

00:34:51.920 Hey, what if I told you and just play this out?

00:34:57.760 you started working with kevin a long time ago he got privy to some of your tricks some of your

00:35:05.980 tradecraft when you watch that video back he was wearing a button camera oh and he took a

00:35:15.800 a mexican button camera version of your button camera footage that's actually dubbed in espanol 0.75

00:35:22.720 what do you have you ever thought that maybe you you might have get fucking double-crossed by a 0.76

00:35:28.440 by a no i a spy from sudad juarez i never thought about that i never thought about that 0.80

00:35:34.360 it's hard to think about why did this guy meet with you

00:35:37.920 yeah that is such that might be the best question that might be the best question i'll tell you why

00:35:44.920 i found a private investigator who had made some sort of connection with the guy

00:35:50.840 and the private investigator essentially led me to him convinced chuck to show me and him the video

00:35:58.580 but then why would he even show us the video i don't know like things things this this whole

00:36:04.020 this whole this whole story like doesn't add up and i don't think it'll ever add up like uh i don't

00:36:10.220 know if anyone is interested in this if you're gonna get the answers ever from me yeah bro 0.72

00:36:17.500 everybody's interested in fucking aliens yeah yeah you got the footage you gotta go elsewhere 0.92

00:36:22.500 dylan sent me this a chinese rover it's freaking chinese dude i keep finding everything they got 0.98

00:36:29.440 the balloons flying everywhere too chinese rovers discovered sand dunes that were altered by water

00:36:34.380 as recently as several hundred thousand years ago as recently as several hundred thousand years

00:36:39.480 in the grand scheme of things that's not that that's a second on mars i'm getting there on mars

00:36:45.860 That means that that area of the planet

00:36:48.900 Capable of supporting life

00:36:50.120 May be larger than one's thought

00:36:51.560 We're talking about

00:36:52.400 This could be, you know

00:36:54.060 The size of the United States

00:36:55.820 I just made that last part 1.00

00:36:57.800 What did you say about a penis? 0.99

00:37:03.320 Sorry, what did you just say? 0.99

00:37:04.420 Can you just repeat what you just said

00:37:05.500 Exactly the way

00:37:06.280 Some people suggest

00:37:07.220 That life

00:37:09.800 Yeah

00:37:10.340 Started on Venus and Mars

00:37:12.220 Is it

00:37:12.920 Hundreds of thousands, millions of years ago

00:37:14.900 Yeah

00:37:15.160 and humans reincarnated on Earth.

00:37:17.480 Yeah, I think I've heard enough.

00:37:18.300 You need a haircut, Dylan.

00:37:19.500 You need a haircut.

00:37:20.280 You got the thickest hair

00:37:21.300 I've ever seen in my life.

00:37:22.120 I don't think I've ever thought

00:37:23.000 a cat could talk until today.

00:37:25.620 Yeah.

00:37:26.640 Did you read that book, Logan?

00:37:27.920 I can't read. 0.99

00:37:28.600 Men are from Mars, 1.00

00:37:29.300 women are from Mars.

00:37:30.360 Men are from Mars, 1.00

00:37:31.460 women are from Venus. 1.00

00:37:31.880 Girls go to Jupiter, 1.00

00:37:32.700 get more stupider. 1.00

00:37:34.220 I know that's where boys go. 1.00

00:37:37.520 I had that theory, too.

00:37:39.200 I thought that...

00:37:40.520 Well, I thought that we were all

00:37:42.620 like monkeys, you know?

00:37:44.040 Like, way, way back. 1.00

00:37:45.160 and then an alien came and fucked that monkey, 1.00

00:37:47.780 and that made, like, an intelligent human. 1.00

00:37:50.520 You know what I would do?

00:37:51.180 You know what I would do with that footage?

00:37:52.400 But then Mike told me that that's...

00:37:54.020 I would show it to Bob Lazar.

00:37:56.240 Do you know who Bob Lazar is?

00:37:57.500 Yeah, Bob Lazar.

00:37:58.680 Bob Lazar.

00:37:59.040 Yeah, he worked at S-4, allegedly, you know,

00:38:02.400 on an alien aircraft that had an anti-gravity device.

00:38:06.500 I watched a Rogan interview with him.

00:38:09.620 It is captivating.

00:38:12.380 It is highly fascinating,

00:38:14.180 and i i found it interesting and i would show the footage to bob lazar to ask him if he's seen

00:38:20.580 anything like it and in in that case maybe if he if he if he can verify the legitimacy of this tape

00:38:28.220 then maybe i would release it is there anything that you're willing to share uh from a specificity

00:38:34.620 standpoint like dude do these aliens i'll share i'll share one thing i'll share one thing because 1.00

00:38:38.980 Fuck you fuckers 1.00

00:38:41.320 You know Gumby 1.00

00:38:43.740 You know Gumby and Pokey the horse

00:38:45.560 You know Gumby

00:38:46.420 Do they look like Gumby

00:38:47.880 No you don't see the aliens

00:38:49.160 I'll tell you

00:38:51.520 I'll spill the beans

00:38:56.180 I was gonna maybe save it on Rogan

00:39:00.060 Save it for Rogan

00:39:01.160 But he's platformed to so many people 0.99

00:39:03.320 That just talk shit about me on his show 0.98

00:39:04.560 Well this was a good one 0.99

00:39:06.100 Alright so

00:39:07.700 So the footage is compelling, not convincing.

00:39:15.460 It's from 1995.

00:39:18.000 The tape had been worn down.

00:39:19.740 It's been played probably over 100 times.

00:39:21.680 And so the quality is not great. 0.97

00:39:24.120 And everything about it screams bullshit, which is the true reason I haven't released it. 0.94

00:39:32.080 It's not enough. 0.98

00:39:33.620 It doesn't have enough meat on the bone and proof for me to put it out confidently and be like, this is legit UFO footage.

00:39:40.360 There's one kind of interesting thing about the video that could prove its validity.

00:39:51.900 when you scrub through the footage forward and or forward and back like kind of fast like you

00:40:00.040 take your little um slider and you scrub through like this the disc hovers so so fluidly it's like

00:40:10.280 it's like buoyant almost in the air and i'm not sure if that type of movement like as fluid as it

00:40:17.900 was was possible in 1995 vfx editing it it it looks it looks like like too good it looks too

00:40:28.420 good and it's the one compelling thing about this video where i'm like that's maybe that's something

00:40:33.820 but i i don't like i said i just don't have enough information at the moment to confidently release

00:40:39.000 this video unless i can prove that it is somewhat legit and maybe bob lazar can help me

00:40:47.760 1995.

00:40:48.660 1995.

00:40:49.680 You're talking to me about SFX from 1995.

00:40:52.300 I saw a dinosaur, a T-Rex, eat a man in Jurassic Park around the same year.

00:40:59.280 Thought it was real for basically the whole of my entire life.

00:41:02.780 93, bro.

00:41:03.840 93.

00:41:04.320 I'm going to be honest.

00:41:05.100 Even the Stay Puft guy from Ghostbusters, it could have been real.

00:41:08.420 If I was in New York City and I looked up and saw that exact Stay Puft guy, I would believe it was real.

00:41:12.660 100%.

00:41:13.500 When did Star Wars come out?

00:41:16.720 70s. 0.99

00:41:17.120 Late 70s, bro, and they had fucking... 0.99

00:41:18.960 I still think that's real. 0.99

00:41:20.540 I think Star Wars is a documentary.

00:41:22.940 Like, that was actually a real date, bro. 0.98

00:41:25.220 That wasn't a fucking thing. 0.98

00:41:26.580 Oh, whoa, look at the back of this. 0.99

00:41:28.780 Yeah, aliens.

00:41:30.220 I'm obsessed with UFO technology and aliens,

00:41:33.800 and I just hope I live to see the day

00:41:35.720 where some sort of advancement is made

00:41:40.540 because these things defy physics.

00:41:43.300 They defy physics.

00:41:44.380 They can move through matter like it does not exist.

00:41:48.740 They can go just as fast in water as they can through the air.

00:41:51.040 It doesn't make sense.

00:41:51.720 How do you know?

00:41:52.220 How do you know?

00:41:52.600 Because the Navy captured a USO, unidentified submerged object, moving through water at like 400 miles an hour.

00:41:58.920 That's impossible.

00:41:59.700 Hello?

00:42:00.140 That's impossible.

00:42:01.000 You can't drop from 50,000 feet in the air to 10 feet above the ocean in one second.

00:42:04.780 That's what the Tic Tac did.

00:42:06.000 These things – and this is like military captured, proven government verified fact.

00:42:12.640 Yeah.

00:42:12.820 Like, we need an explanation for these things.

00:42:16.280 Potentially, that's how the pyramids were built, too.

00:42:18.920 Well, I had a theory about the pyramids as well.

00:42:21.940 Well, Rogan talks about the pyramids a lot as well.

00:42:23.620 I'm not so sure the Egyptians built the pyramids.

00:42:26.200 I think it was Rogan.

00:42:27.280 I think the Egyptians stumbled upon the pyramids.

00:42:29.760 Do you know that there's not a single hieroglyphic inside the pyramids?

00:42:32.860 That's a little weird.

00:42:33.700 Why are they calling it a tomb?

00:42:34.760 Never been a body of a pharaoh found in there ever.

00:42:37.360 That's interesting.

00:42:39.000 I've seen a lot of things recently that the pyramids potentially were used to channel energy.

00:42:43.500 It was like a Nikola Tesla theory.

00:42:45.300 Maybe because the ions in the water can charge the particles and beam wireless energy through the area.

00:42:52.520 I don't know.

00:42:53.440 But that's also Rogan's theory on it, at least when he talked about it,

00:42:57.380 was that he believes that there was a super intelligent civilization

00:43:04.220 that possessed intelligence greater than the one we currently do

00:43:08.580 that was then wiped out by a cataclysmic event.

00:43:11.380 But around the time when the pyramids were built,

00:43:14.120 they were built by this super intelligent species

00:43:18.460 that is now gone because of this cataclysmic event.

00:43:20.720 So in reality, we're reverse cavemen. 0.87

00:43:25.020 Like we've actually, we've been dumbed down.

00:43:26.800 It's like WALL-E where the people don't have bones

00:43:28.520 I actually have a theory as well

00:43:29.720 You know the fat people in WALL-E

00:43:32.040 I love WALL-E

00:43:33.300 I think there are people on this earth 1.00

00:43:37.540 That are actually more dumb 1.00

00:43:39.140 Than cavemen were 1.00

00:43:40.520 I believe that

00:43:41.620 I think the only difference that we have 0.74

00:43:43.640 In our silly little worlds

00:43:46.620 Is just access to technology 0.77

00:43:48.840 I think like scholars 0.99

00:43:50.840 In the fucking 0.98

00:43:51.880 1200s, 1300s, 1400s 0.99

00:43:54.960 extremely intelligent human beings

00:43:57.860 they just didn't have an iPhone.

00:44:00.220 I don't think we've progressed

00:44:01.700 that much and I think we're progressing super slowly.

00:44:05.160 I said this before on this podcast

00:44:07.320 I'm fairly positive that the

00:44:09.620 human race is only here to create

00:44:11.900 the master species. 1.00

00:44:13.780 Which is going to be

00:44:15.640 half human half android and eventually all android.

00:44:17.800 Which by the way we're on our way there

00:44:19.660 right now. I would say we're 25% android

00:44:21.800 now. When's the last time you weren't looking

00:44:23.720 at your phone on jet suite today we're sitting in the in the in the aisle right or in the seat

00:44:28.540 just waiting for the plane to take off every human on their phone including me including me

00:44:33.180 why would it not be but it's just it's fascinating if you were to show a picture of people looking at

00:44:37.360 this infinity box to like someone in 1904 they'd be enthralled by what by by what we're doing we're

00:44:45.380 just look at this box all day long they don't talk to their families they just look at the box

00:44:50.460 oh why what are they doing with their their thumb oh they're scrolling through meaningless 0.98

00:44:54.860 information and and photographs of people's fucking food that mike malak posted from the 0.99

00:45:00.240 cheesecake factory him and his friends while they were fighting a four-year-old like that's the type 0.99

00:45:04.200 of shit that we're that that runs our life no one's looking up into the into the cosmos saying 0.99

00:45:09.820 oh i wonder you know who's up there out there yeah maybe a few people but the majority of us 1.00

00:45:14.500 are saying damn did you see what lady fucking gaga and doja cat were the fucking met gala 0.99

00:45:19.320 She dressed up as a cat 1.00

00:45:20.420 Who gives a fuck 1.00

00:45:21.340 I got a real life cat 0.99

00:45:22.560 Sitting in front of me right now

00:45:23.740 He's not dressed as one 1.00

00:45:24.980 He is one 1.00

00:45:25.580 Let's go

00:45:26.180 But seriously 0.99

00:45:27.580 Who gives a fuck 0.87

00:45:28.380 What anybody wore to the Met Gala 1.00

00:45:29.520 Fuck the Met Gala dude 0.99

00:45:31.180 Yo you remember when we were kids 1.00

00:45:33.440 And you would get like bored 0.98

00:45:34.640 You'd jerk off 0.98

00:45:36.020 We don't have that anymore 0.99

00:45:37.080 Well

00:45:37.880 Being bored 0.99

00:45:39.580 You'd have to jerk off 0.99

00:45:40.480 In the movie theater 0.99

00:45:41.220 You couldn't even

00:45:44.100 I still do that dude

00:45:45.560 Yo come on

00:45:46.640 I'm not gonna lie

00:45:47.180 Come on

00:45:47.680 You can't say something like that.

00:45:49.340 Yeah, I do, dude.

00:45:50.240 You can't say that. 0.99

00:45:50.820 Like Jack Nicholson in The fucking Departed, dude. 0.98

00:45:53.060 With the time Blackfield though. 0.99

00:45:54.980 Come on.

00:45:57.020 I'm happy we grew up without it, though.

00:45:58.800 So at least you got to see a different life.

00:46:01.700 I didn't know anything about it.

00:46:02.620 I had no phone.

00:46:03.380 I had a BMX bike.

00:46:04.440 That was the only thing I cared about.

00:46:05.800 Did you have pegs in the front and back?

00:46:06.860 I had pegs on one side.

00:46:08.160 Front and back peggers were weird, bro.

00:46:09.720 Yeah, I agree.

00:46:10.020 That just meant you were giving people rides places.

00:46:11.840 I had pegs on my left side so I could grind. 0.88

00:46:13.540 That was my dominant side.

00:46:14.880 Now I got a burger shop.

00:46:15.700 It's so funny in my head to picture Mike doing anything athletic.

00:46:18.620 Yeah, that's why I laughed.

00:46:19.420 I used to grind.

00:46:21.560 Yeah, right, bro.

00:46:22.720 Yeah, right.

00:46:24.740 Evidently, Mike used to be able to move a little.

00:46:28.880 I'm way better than I can now, but I never was super.

00:46:31.740 I just wasn't super athletic.

00:46:33.320 I had a passion for basketball and baseball.

00:46:35.460 I was decent at baseball.

00:46:36.380 I made this traveling all-star team when I played baseball.

00:46:42.860 But I just never was real.

00:46:43.920 I'm too lanky, bro. 0.99

00:46:45.700 You know, the only thing I was really ever good at was fucking, dude. 0.99

00:46:49.620 Honestly, ever since I was at cycling. 0.98

00:46:51.780 That's one thing that we've been doing together, our old man hobby.

00:46:54.740 Good at rating burgers. 0.98

00:46:56.720 You rate the fuck out of a burger. 0.98

00:46:58.220 Cycling got him off of heroin. 0.99

00:46:59.700 Did you know that?

00:47:00.540 That's what helped him, I guess.

00:47:03.640 It was a nice try at the layup.

00:47:04.900 Bring me back in a second.

00:47:05.800 I want to touch on this heroin thing.

00:47:06.920 I want to talk about heroin.

00:47:07.860 Jeff talks about heroin 24-7, more than anybody I've ever met.

00:47:11.460 and now he talks about heroin so much that he started getting served ads on instagram for pills

00:47:19.040 to help you get off heroin yeah suboxone and i had to be like yo i'm not the one that does heroin

00:47:25.260 like it just happened he got an ad for suboxone which is like a less than method and it was from

00:47:31.820 like bicycle something like bike mike or something and i was like bro this is somebody's watching us

00:47:37.220 no your phone actually is listening to you are we are we saying yes to that 100 percent

00:47:42.100 can you give me my phone it's on on the bed and in the other room uh my dad my dad amongst the um

00:47:49.940 many typically right-wing conservative videos that he sends me on um instagram telling me how

00:47:55.980 we need to save our kids in our country um he sent me a video of what our phones are

00:48:03.440 are doing and how they're listening to us toss it they're watching this one i actually this one

00:48:09.460 they're watching us for sure for sure mark zuckerberg is watching this this one you might

00:48:13.920 want to you might see i don't know if this is some guy trying to get like clickbait or something

00:48:17.860 but look look another iphone trick i guarantee you didn't know about have you ever noticed how

00:48:21.940 you'll be talking about something and then a few days later you get an ad for it on your phone

00:48:25.420 it's because your iphone's microphone at the bottom is actually listening to you even when

00:48:29.140 your phone's not on and i'm going to show you how to turn it off settings open up privacy and

00:48:33.180 click on microphone these are the apps that are listening to you you can turn them off for the

00:48:36.760 ones you don't need then click on tracking and turn off allow apps to request a track there go

00:48:41.540 to apple advertising and turn off personalized ads now go to siri and search and turn off listen

00:48:46.560 for hey siri and turn this one off too if you don't your phone will constantly be listening

00:48:50.500 to you share this with your friends to stay safe and follow for more i like that i like that that

00:48:55.180 guy's cool you know but i just should show him the ufo video yeah that actually he's the guy

00:49:02.160 but but i feel like we you know we've all signed something we've all agreed to a contractual

00:49:10.200 obligation to a company i believe the first one was messages when messages came on came out from

00:49:17.420 facebook when you agreed to use the messages app you agreed to allow messages to listen 0.98

00:49:22.300 to your microphone when you were not fucking using it bro 0.99

00:49:26.640 100% 0.99

00:49:30.440 Should they pay us for selling our data

00:49:32.200 No it's just not realistic

00:49:34.420 But also at the same time

00:49:35.720 I gotta say this

00:49:36.880 That could work

00:49:38.680 I gotta say this and maybe this is like a week 0.96

00:49:41.620 Another hot week take like my dwarf take earlier 0.98

00:49:44.260 Dude 0.98

00:49:45.620 I gave up a long time ago bro 0.99

00:49:47.980 They're watching us jerk off 1.00

00:49:49.820 They're listening to us jerk off 0.99

00:49:51.400 It's a fact of the matter 0.97

00:49:53.520 If you want to put a little piece of tape over 0.99

00:49:55.780 every fucking hole in a teddy bear at your daughter's room because maybe there's a camera 1.00

00:49:59.600 sticking go ahead be that fucking guy be that guy that lives off the fucking land kill a fucking 1.00

00:50:04.980 iguana and fry it on the fucking grill for christ's sake i don't give a fuck what are you gonna fucking 1.00

00:50:09.640 do live your whole life like that dude yo don't look through the peephole because it'll take a 1.00

00:50:13.540 picture of your eye and make a biometric image of it and then you won't be able to get into the 1.00

00:50:16.740 fucking laboratory next i don't fucking care fuck you dude i'm fucking eating my cheeseburgers 1.00

00:50:22.000 Suck my dick 1.00

00:50:22.840 Okay, fuck you, dude 1.00

00:50:24.080 That's what I don't care 1.00

00:50:25.300 Take my data

00:50:26.120 You're right

00:50:26.720 Because if they are going to blackmail us 0.99

00:50:28.360 With the videos of us jerking off 0.99

00:50:29.560 Then everybody's got to deal with that 0.98

00:50:31.300 You know

00:50:31.660 So we're all going to have videos

00:50:33.300 I know, but some of us

00:50:34.080 Some of us is going to be weirder than others 1.00

00:50:36.400 Because of dick size 1.00

00:50:37.380 Well, no 0.99

00:50:38.300 I was just thinking about like the angle 1.00

00:50:39.800 Transgender porn

00:50:41.180 It's the most searched 0.99

00:50:42.740 Is it a big right now?

00:50:43.680 For straight men

00:50:44.420 What'd you say? 1.00

00:50:45.260 Transgender porn 1.00

00:50:46.000 Is that a big search right now? 1.00

00:50:47.740 Yeah

00:50:48.040 Well, my friend just told me it last week

00:50:50.380 It's not you searching it? 0.54

00:50:51.600 No, he said that he was searching up transgender porn, and then he looked it up, and he was like, oh, this is the most searched porn by straight men. 1.00

00:50:59.620 Shit's fire. 1.00

00:51:01.740 I mean, everybody's fucking searched it up, you know? 1.00

00:51:04.980 Not me. 0.95

00:51:06.200 I don't think that's true, man.

00:51:07.880 I can't say I have.

00:51:08.660 I don't think that's true.

00:51:09.560 I don't know if I've ever typed that in before.

00:51:12.440 Not saying I wouldn't.

00:51:13.540 I'm going to see an edit.

00:51:14.680 You don't have to say not saying I wouldn't.

00:51:16.620 I'll say it for you.

00:51:17.700 You wouldn't.

00:51:18.220 You can actually still say 1.00

00:51:20.460 That you are not interested in transgender porn 1.00

00:51:23.100 I assure you 1.00

00:51:24.380 Am I allowed to say that? 0.99

00:51:24.900 Yes, I assure you you can fucking say that 0.98

00:51:27.060 It's not what I'm into 0.97

00:51:27.920 Perfect, perfect

00:51:29.380 I don't think it's a crime

00:51:31.140 It's not a crime 0.99

00:51:32.340 It's not a fucking crime 0.98

00:51:33.660 To say I don't want to see that 0.98

00:51:35.120 Yo, you are fired up

00:51:37.680 What is going on, Mark?

00:51:41.000 I'm upset about the world

00:51:43.280 And if you get woke, you go broke

00:51:46.420 Bro, tonight, all you want

00:51:49.000 Wait till the dirt off like real videos come out

00:51:52.120 And we really see the truth 0.99

00:51:53.140 Tonight, all you want, I don't give a fuck 0.99

00:51:54.440 You know, this might be a good segue 0.99

00:51:57.860 Into something new I've been working on

00:51:59.440 Yeah, Mike has his own burger shop

00:52:01.300 Mike has his own burger shop

00:52:02.540 Congratulations to my friend

00:52:03.900 I know you've been working very hard on this

00:52:05.880 1010 Burger has launched in Jeddah, Saudi Arabia

00:52:09.660 It's the first of its kind

00:52:11.560 It's a test

00:52:12.040 And we are excited to welcome 1010 Burger to the United States

00:52:15.980 It's called 1010 because Mike has the most viewed burger fast casual review show online, and he rates them out of 10.

00:52:24.960 And, you know, I'm just going to say what he's saying.

00:52:28.260 He's claiming his burger is a 10.

00:52:30.040 And I don't know if it is, but let me tell you something.

00:52:33.480 When it comes to the United States and I try that burger, my guy, it better be a 10 out of 10.

00:52:38.420 It better be the best fast casual burger I've ever had in my life if you're going to brand everything 10 out of 10.

00:52:42.620 Dude, I have traveled for the past three years, many of the reviews, including my good friend Jeff Wittick, and of course you as well, all over the world, Greece, Australia, Saudi Arabia, Qatar, Miami, everywhere, all over the planet, studying, observing, researching, developing, concepting in my brain, what is it about the width of that pickle?

00:53:03.540 what is it about the slice on that onion what is it about the thickness of that american cheese

00:53:08.220 that blend of meat that bun that's being used that creates such a special thing and i concept

00:53:14.260 and i created in my mind what i think is the ideal smash burger experience i then found a

00:53:20.320 chef in los angeles by the way the burger capital of the world right now who was able to recreate

00:53:25.480 that concept that i had in my mind and 1010 burger was born and you know it's the reason it's in jet

00:53:31.740 of saudi arabia is because i needed a partner that would move fast and would get it done there's a

00:53:36.100 lot of people that like to play the hurry up and wait game in this world they didn't and it's and

00:53:40.460 we're testing it out out there so if you're in uae you're in dubai you're in doha whatever and you

00:53:45.540 want to take a flip over it's there till june 7th uh jet a city walk and then slowly but surely i'm

00:53:50.940 going to start to roll those out to the united states and uk and australia and everywhere else 0.98

00:53:54.500 we're going to take over we're going to take over everything else sucks fuck smash burger it's like 1.00

00:53:58.060 How you talk shit 1.00

00:53:58.740 About your competitors 1.00

00:53:59.420 They suck 1.00

00:54:00.400 Wow 1.00

00:54:00.900 No I don't 1.00

00:54:01.700 I don't talk shit 0.99

00:54:02.280 I think it's a 0.99

00:54:02.860 It's an and world

00:54:03.740 You know

00:54:04.100 Competitions

00:54:05.460 Welcome

00:54:06.200 Wherever we go 1.00

00:54:07.640 I'm gonna smash them out 0.99

00:54:08.540 They're not even gonna 1.00

00:54:09.040 Fucking exist anymore 0.98

00:54:10.000 It's gonna be or 1.00

00:54:10.920 Okay

00:54:11.380 I've been hanging out

00:54:13.240 With Jeff a lot

00:54:13.780 Eat 1010 burger

00:54:15.140 Chase it with some prime

00:54:16.540 How do we make that happen

00:54:19.100 By the way

00:54:19.500 I wanna talk about that

00:54:20.340 Listen I'm not interested 1.00

00:54:21.120 In your fucking shit 1.00

00:54:21.840 Nice 1.00

00:54:24.100 Comment below

00:54:25.940 You think Mike deserves

00:54:26.860 Equity in prime

00:54:27.520 No no not that

00:54:28.300 That's not what I meant

00:54:29.440 That

00:54:29.840 They don't even have to comment

00:54:30.760 Are you

00:54:31.160 Are you giving out equity

00:54:32.360 In 1010 Burger

00:54:33.300 Of course

00:54:33.660 Both of you have equity

00:54:34.680 In 1010 Burger

00:54:35.320 I know it doesn't

00:54:36.200 How much are we talking

00:54:37.080 I want it

00:54:38.380 You know of course

00:54:39.060 You can have mine

00:54:39.520 I can have his

00:54:40.280 There you go

00:54:40.840 Don't ever demean the equity 0.99

00:54:42.620 I'm gonna fucking go gamble 1.00

00:54:44.120 That shit downstairs 1.00

00:54:44.640 No because I know 1.00

00:54:44.980 Because I know

00:54:45.500 Because I know

00:54:46.720 Because I know

00:54:46.800 What you're gonna do

00:54:47.280 Because I know

00:54:47.660 What you're gonna do

00:54:48.080 Because you do it prime

00:54:48.960 I'm not asking you

00:54:50.620 To push the beverage

00:54:51.280 I'm not asking you

00:54:52.100 To promote prime

00:54:52.640 You do it yourself

00:54:53.600 And then you guilt trip me

00:54:54.720 Into making you think

00:54:55.740 Like you deserve

00:54:56.520 Something for me

00:54:57.500 And that's what you're gonna do

00:54:58.520 When you give me equity

00:54:59.460 In Tentenburg

00:55:00.100 You go

00:55:00.380 I give you equity in mine

00:55:01.500 You don't give me equity in yours

00:55:02.800 You can't do that

00:55:04.240 That's not what I'm doing

00:55:05.260 I already know what I have 1.00

00:55:06.420 In this shit 1.00

00:55:06.940 Fucking shit 1.00

00:55:08.420 It's great 1.00

00:55:09.380 It's so delicious

00:55:10.040 But what I'm saying is this

00:55:11.500 My friends will be included

00:55:13.440 I want my friends included 1.00

00:55:14.720 Fuck the money part 1.00

00:55:15.940 I want my friends included 1.00

00:55:16.960 I want my friends at the fucking table 1.00

00:55:18.200 Lose the onions 1.00

00:55:19.320 No onions

00:55:20.340 In the whole place

00:55:21.160 Leave

00:55:21.600 Go home

00:55:22.060 Go play roulette

00:55:22.660 Hot take

00:55:22.860 Hot take 0.77

00:55:23.740 Hot take 1.00

00:55:24.640 Of course you love fucking onions 1.00

00:55:26.380 No, Jeff's a banished onions kind of guy, dude 1.00

00:55:32.040 Yeah

00:55:33.220 He hates onions

00:55:34.160 You put onions on it, it's a zero

00:55:35.720 Wow

00:55:36.680 Is it like optional to remove things, Mike?

00:55:40.360 Or is it just the Mike way?

00:55:41.380 Yeah, no, you can

00:55:42.040 You can remove those

00:55:42.540 Bro, you would be the guy that's like 1.00

00:55:44.900 Nah, my shit's perfect 1.00

00:55:45.980 You gotta take it the way I make it 1.00

00:55:47.280 It's funny because that was a conversation

00:55:49.340 You know that

00:55:49.960 At one point it was a conversation

00:55:51.320 But dude, it's an and world

00:55:52.620 You know, there can be multiple type of things at the same time 0.99

00:55:56.320 It's no ketchup allowed, shit like that. 0.99

00:55:58.380 So I did. 0.99

00:55:59.000 It was a part of the concept at first.

00:56:00.580 You could not make changes to the burger of any kind.

00:56:04.160 We had one.

00:56:05.640 Listen to this.

00:56:06.800 At one point, when you walked into the store, you only could say a number,

00:56:10.740 and that was how many meals you got of a set thing.

00:56:13.420 If you wanted no pickles, take them off outside, 0.99

00:56:16.920 and don't fucking tell me about it. 0.98

00:56:18.200 I've created the perfect burger. 1.00

00:56:20.040 Your opinion doesn't fucking matter. 0.99

00:56:22.020 Deal with it. 0.99

00:56:22.800 But you didn't do that?

00:56:23.580 I didn't do that.

00:56:24.080 No, because people have thoughts.

00:56:25.700 Yeah, well, customers first.

00:56:26.840 Correct.

00:56:27.260 You got to put your customers first.

00:56:28.860 Like you're doing 515 with Lemonade.

00:56:31.680 Yeah, yeah.

00:56:32.600 So, yeah, Prime Lemonade launched.

00:56:33.800 I think it's our best flavor.

00:56:34.800 It launches 515.

00:56:36.280 We just launched in South Africa at Checkers.

00:56:39.480 Retailers are saying they've never seen anything like it in the three decades they've been retailing.

00:56:44.800 But, yeah, the launch in South Africa has been a major success.

00:56:47.820 I love that country.

00:56:48.880 And it turns out Prime, I think because of the nature of social media, is indeed a global brand.

00:56:54.040 It's a blessing that we as the young innovators, our whole team is extremely young.

00:57:03.240 All the owners of Prime are under the age of 30, including the people who manufacture this beverage.

00:57:11.920 So we can be nimble and super strategic with the decisions and type of content we're making.

00:57:18.040 And the nature of social media is that of a global audience.

00:57:22.200 And so we are able to go global with our beverage, you know, like some of our competitors don't even exist in the U.K.

00:57:29.000 And so we can come in there and just steal that market share.

00:57:31.800 But like I said, it's an it's an it's an and world.

00:57:33.960 And so, like, we welcome any competition at the end of the day, though, is a high probability that we're healthier.

00:57:40.280 We're better for you and we taste much better with only 20 calories, two grams of sugar, 10 percent coconut water, BCAAs and 834 milligrams of electrolytes drink prime.

00:57:48.740 That sounded like one of those things at the end on the radio stations

00:57:51.860 where it's like, not FDIC, insurance.

00:57:54.340 I was just wondering, though, like, after you have sex, 0.99

00:57:58.120 if you still have a boner, how do you go pee? 0.99

00:58:00.760 Shower.

00:58:01.700 Easiest answer. 0.61

00:58:02.800 Shower against the wall.

00:58:04.420 You go in the shower, you point your intercontinental

00:58:08.440 Bluetooth-fueled missile at the wall, 1.00

00:58:11.940 and you spray down the fucking wall. 1.00

00:58:13.660 Or Superman position over the toilet. 1.00

00:58:15.520 But it depends on how...

00:58:16.080 No, no, no.

00:58:16.740 See, that one I've never found realistic. 0.98

00:58:19.160 It's ridiculous. 0.70

00:58:19.660 What do you do, Jeff? 1.00

00:58:21.260 You just don't have sex. 1.00

00:58:22.120 Or you don't have boners. 1.00

00:58:23.140 No, I mean, I'll just fucking figure it out. 0.99

00:58:25.980 I don't know. 0.94

00:58:26.520 I don't have like a same method.

00:58:28.240 What do you mean figure it out?

00:58:30.100 I'm asking you to get tactical with me, bro. 1.00

00:58:32.620 You just go fucking aim in the toilet. 1.00

00:58:34.480 Or if you have a bathtub, piss down the bathtub. 1.00

00:58:36.380 Aim.

00:58:38.000 Yeah, but Logan, can I ask you this really quick?

00:58:42.700 Aim.

00:58:43.460 Can I ask you this really quick?

00:58:46.040 Aim.

00:58:46.740 what do you mean how do you keep saying aim no no i know why he's saying that because

00:58:50.900 it's hard to aim an erect eiffel tower like device from your body what i'm saying is this

00:58:56.620 after you finish the act this is 500 episodes in now no need for me to say anything vulgar

00:59:03.020 after you finalize the action that you're trying to do you you dump you dump the the cultivating

00:59:12.080 organic seed doesn't your doesn't your tool become a bit rubbery like what are you like 28 0.98

00:59:20.440 years old with the testosterone of a fucking bull mike maybe at your age rubbery is a good 0.99

00:59:25.600 word to use but at my age i'd use a word more like platinum titanium concrete motherfucker 1.00

00:59:31.800 you know what mike yeah dude i get it can i tell the story about how you uh took a placebo 0.99

00:59:37.700 blue chew and it fucking ruined your whole night did you just ask me can i tell a story by telling 0.98

00:59:43.080 the story is that what you just fucking did of course you could tell the story yeah yeah yeah 0.98

00:59:47.760 it was my so they sent it to me because i was doing a brand deal for it and they give you the 0.99

00:59:52.480 like the fake ones placebos because they can't prescribe you if you're just a regular guy you

00:59:56.600 know so he took one of mine and then he went out that night was it i put it i was honest i was on

01:00:02.360 a show and i i did a plug for him which was funny and i took the placebo blue tune i just put it in

01:00:08.120 my pocket and i went out later that night and you know i was like damn i really gotta pop off for

01:00:13.780 this girl because she's a new a new one and i i who was it which one no need to talk about it 0.95

01:00:18.580 no need to talk about not on this fucking platform because that one will go okay but a new one that 0.98

01:00:23.740 i'm very i'm so disrespectful i'm a mask girl she wears a ski mask nobody knows her you just 0.99

01:00:28.980 belittled my whole shit you were like nobody gives a fuck about your show that's who it is that's not 0.99

01:00:33.600 what i said that's not what i said i love your show i fucking love your show that's why anyways 1.00

01:00:38.320 i'm very invested in this in this situation at least from a intercourse standpoint and so i 0.79

01:00:44.380 want to make sure that was fire on all cylinders so i so we're out we're having dinner together

01:00:48.080 running the bathroom i pop this you know this this gasoline this this rocket fuel that i'm so

01:00:55.380 used to be in my my my best thing and it's like uh you know when you start an engine on a car and

01:01:02.860 there's a problem with the with the igniter on the car or whatever it's called and it just won't

01:01:06.320 turn over yeah it just wasn't i didn't feel the same tingle in my in my wiener yeah and you felt

01:01:12.020 your age well it looks like everybody's getting kind of tired and you're the whole production

01:01:16.680 team's yawn and yeah we got it done you're bored oh you gotta fly yeah i wonder if our audience has

01:01:23.080 To fly anywhere right now

01:01:23.920 I'm sure they'd

01:01:24.540 I'm sure they'd like

01:01:25.240 To keep watching

01:01:25.860 I mean was it

01:01:26.520 I mean I don't

01:01:27.820 You know

01:01:28.280 I mean who knows

01:01:28.960 You're rocking

01:01:29.460 Keep rocking

01:01:29.940 Nah we're not dude

01:01:30.920 I don't even know

01:01:31.540 What to say

01:01:31.860 I look around me

01:01:32.480 You guys

01:01:32.800 I'm 28 years old 1.00

01:01:34.180 My dick's hard 1.00

01:01:34.700 All the fucking time 1.00

01:01:35.480 I have so much energy 1.00

01:01:36.220 Fucking sleeping on the couch 0.99

01:01:37.460 Can't even finish a program 1.00

01:01:38.680 For your loyal audience

01:01:40.400 It's sad

01:01:41.320 I got some topics

01:01:43.100 Yeah yeah

01:01:43.620 We got uh

01:01:44.660 Heroin

01:01:46.380 We got um

01:01:47.520 They're taking

01:01:48.120 AM radios out of cars

01:01:49.540 I guess cause podcasts 0.99

01:01:50.980 And shit 0.98

01:01:51.500 That's 1.00

01:01:51.800 I don't even talk about that 0.99

01:01:52.640 I don't give a fuck 0.98

01:01:53.200 What else 0.98

01:01:54.640 I mean that's all

01:01:57.520 We need to know

01:01:58.040 We don't need to go

01:01:58.900 Into detail on it

01:01:59.700 AM radio is gone

01:02:00.920 Done

01:02:01.680 Who cares

01:02:02.380 It's news with Jeff

01:02:03.860 That's what I was

01:02:04.900 Going to ask

01:02:05.300 What do you think

01:02:05.980 Your format is going to be

01:02:07.500 On the show Jeff

01:02:08.820 Like

01:02:09.100 We all kind of

01:02:10.500 We have roles

01:02:11.240 When you got tickets

01:02:12.200 To UFC fights

01:02:13.020 I'm just going to pop in

01:02:14.140 For those you know

01:02:15.020 Bro 0.99

01:02:15.900 That fucking UFC fight 0.99

01:02:17.280 I'm still like 1.00

01:02:18.100 That was crazy

01:02:18.960 That was great right

01:02:19.440 Israel Adesanya

01:02:20.280 Knocking out Pereira

01:02:21.440 We got in a fight after that

01:02:23.900 When you left

01:02:24.920 Should we talk about that?

01:02:27.940 You don't want me to because it's embarrassing for you

01:02:30.220 No it's not

01:02:30.680 It's just too much of a can of worms

01:02:33.420 You know what did happen at that fight though? 1.00

01:02:36.920 That led to some real shit 0.99

01:02:39.200 I had asked 0.99

01:02:42.380 A young up and coming creator

01:02:44.260 Jideon

01:02:44.860 To move his seat

01:02:48.460 He was seated next to us

01:02:49.700 and he was live streaming the whole night yeah um i think he was he was i think he was paid to be

01:02:54.780 there by the way jideon's and not only a friend uh uh but he's he works with us with with prime as

01:03:00.480 well and so like i got i got a lot of respect for this guy crushing it yeah you know he's great um

01:03:05.600 and so i asked him politely i said hey you know would you be willing to move or switch seat with

01:03:09.400 seats with us because like i just don't feel like being live streamed yeah i don't think that's like

01:03:12.660 an absurd request my girl's there like you know we're adults um and he was fine with it he moved

01:03:18.320 he moved and but the internet but like the internet was like not really like nice to him about it i 0.76

01:03:23.900 think he got like a lot of shit for it or i don't know trump was drinking prime oh that was at that 0.58

01:03:29.480 fight too i thought that's what you were gonna say but then you went a different way sorry yeah 0.99

01:03:32.840 dude dude oh my god i never talked about this yeah um now that we're kind of in bed with dana

01:03:38.960 white because it's prime uh he he's he's been very very kind to us and um he does nice things

01:03:46.940 for me i was i was at this i was at this fight and he calls me over and introduces me to donald

01:03:51.840 trump and donald trump said something like you know he said something like uh you know you are

01:03:56.980 fantastic just i gotta say just fantastic i'm like thank you mr trump i'm like hi at the moment

01:04:02.820 i didn't really know what was going on and he says some other nice things and then i go to sit

01:04:07.100 down in my seat and about 30 minutes later he's oh oh he also told me how good prime was and i was

01:04:11.940 like oh thank you so i go to sit down in my seat and donald trump stands up and he grabs the prime

01:04:17.420 that's in front of him and he kind of is like holding it by his side and he looks at me and 0.99

01:04:20.760 he like nods me and goes like this and gives me the like damn the shit's good kind of kind of 0.97

01:04:25.000 signal and jeff you got a picture of him holding the prime and i was just like nodding you know 0.99

01:04:30.800 like a proud dad proud of my my baby this product the former president of the united states one of

01:04:36.100 the most recognizable people on the planet is like giving me props on and uh he said it down

01:04:41.080 But you captured the photo that went viral

01:04:43.040 Which is funny because I don't think anyone else got it

01:04:45.280 Well if you were to let Gideon live stream me

01:04:47.160 The whole time you would have had video and audio

01:04:48.740 No no no because he was still sitting next to me

01:04:51.420 And the moment I turned from making eye contact

01:04:53.740 With Trump I was looking at Gideon

01:04:56.000 Gideon was right there

01:04:57.360 And I looked to the right of Gideon

01:04:58.540 And his camera was pointed in that direction

01:05:00.520 So I said oh my god they got that on camera 0.98

01:05:03.200 Like the live stream I feel so stupid

01:05:05.860 Because the live stream actually worked in my favor

01:05:07.660 But at that moment

01:05:08.740 the wi-fi in the arena had gone down and so it was like cut off and blurry and he only got the

01:05:13.920 tail end and it didn't work but it was a it was a i mean whatever it was a funny shot and he was

01:05:18.680 like making like a funny face when he yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah that was that was crazy that's one

01:05:25.200 thing i like a huge moment that's right yeah that's one thing i like about uh that generation

01:05:30.860 is they would they would still give um like compliments that were very simple like that

01:05:36.680 you know you are fantastic and this drink is fantastic like just very simple kind compliments

01:05:44.660 i think it's really cool to convey your message in a simple short way elon musk talks about this

01:05:51.960 a lot like yes you can hop on a stage or podcast or in a conversation with someone one-on-one and

01:05:59.260 use big words to explain what you're thinking but is your message being understood because that's 0.99

01:06:04.700 Equally, if not more important than knowing what the fuck you're talking about. 0.99

01:06:08.020 You're going to spoon feed it. 0.99

01:06:08.980 Yeah, I mean, or the easiest way possible.

01:06:11.120 If you're explaining, this is what truly makes geniuses, geniuses, and a lot of successful people at the highest level.

01:06:19.480 They can take a really complex, hard-to-understand idea and boil it down into a nugget of information for the masses to understand.

01:06:29.740 It's very difficult.

01:06:31.180 It's a skill set, and Elon Musk is very good at it.

01:06:33.380 If you understand truly how smart that guy is and the sentences that he says are actually understandable, it's because I guarantee Elon is dumbing himself down so people can actually understand what he's talking about.

01:06:44.980 And it's a skill set.

01:06:46.000 It's good to have.

01:06:46.600 And I think the older I get, which is where I'm going with this, I'm going to start being just more particular with my words.

01:06:52.700 So instead of saying a 10-word sentence like, man, I really think you're great and I respect you, I can just do a Trump.

01:06:57.860 You are fantastic.

01:07:00.580 I got – I just say some words.

01:07:02.420 What's that going to do

01:07:03.540 For my longevity

01:07:04.100 And just like that

01:07:06.100 My whole life changed

01:07:07.260 My whole life has changed

01:07:07.840 We're going to go gamble

01:07:08.560 We should have

01:07:09.360 Musk on the show too

01:07:10.720 I want to say that

01:07:11.500 Elon

01:07:12.140 You're not going to come on

01:07:13.560 If you're watching

01:07:14.680 Guys

01:07:15.600 If you're not

01:07:16.920 Subscribed

01:07:17.940 Subscribe to this channel

01:07:19.200 Thank you for watching

01:07:19.900 This episode of Impulsive

01:07:20.740 And thank you Jeff

01:07:21.600 Thank you for joining us

01:07:22.700 Thank you for having me

01:07:23.320 It was great

01:07:23.760 Thanks Jeff

01:07:24.540 And thanks again

01:07:25.180 For the Mac Miller shirt

01:07:26.280 It really meant a lot to me

01:07:27.260 Yeah

01:07:27.540 We love you guys

01:07:28.440 We'll see you next time

01:07:29.060 Take it easy

01:07:29.500 Peace

01:07:30.040 Lisa, tell them about our new show

01:07:32.800 We have a new podcast

01:07:34.180 It's called Don't Lie to Me

01:07:35.700 I'm Lexi Iwanu

01:07:36.960 We're two best friends, 22 years apart

01:07:39.360 But so close at heart

01:07:40.800 And I'm Lisa DiGiulio, the old one

01:07:43.240 Which means we have wildly different references

01:07:45.300 Occasionally different opinions

01:07:46.760 And at this point in my 50s, I've lived it all

01:07:49.500 Now in my 30s, being the founder of New Shoes

01:07:52.560 Good Taste is my business

01:07:54.580 Listen on the iHeartRadio app

01:07:56.600 Apple Podcasts

01:07:57.860 Or wherever you get your podcasts

01:07:59.200 Hi, this is Kylie Brakeman, Angela Jaritana, Jeremy Culhane, Patrick McDonald, and we're

01:08:06.360 the hosts of the Artists on Artists on Artists on Artists podcast, the Improvised Character

01:08:10.760 Comedy podcast, where each week a new panel of artists discuss their craft.

01:08:15.660 Join us for a panel of Eurovision participants.

01:08:18.740 And we do a little Halloween sometimes.

01:08:20.960 Does the Pope dress up?

01:08:22.280 He winks on Halloween.

01:08:24.560 He gets right up next to the microphone.

01:08:25.840 I hear you can almost hear the eyelashes hit each other.

01:08:29.420 You've never seen Italy so quiet as when the Pope gets up to wink on Halloween.

01:08:34.720 Listen to Artists on Artists on Artists on Artists every Thursday on the iHeartRadio app,

01:08:39.220 Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

01:08:42.220 I'm Lacey Mosley, author, actor, stand-up comedian, creator, and host of Scam Goddess Podcast,

01:08:47.860 the true crime comedy podcast all about robbery, fraud, and those who practice it.

01:08:52.240 Each week I bring on an amazing guest.

01:08:54.120 Ooh, I scammed them.

01:08:55.280 What?

01:08:55.840 I could talk to you for an hour.

01:08:57.320 You're a generational yapper, like me.

01:08:59.380 That's why I had to make yapping a job.

01:09:01.340 And now you can catch full episodes of my show on YouTube.

01:09:04.600 Start listening to Scam Goddess on the iHeartRadio app,

01:09:07.580 Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

01:09:10.540 Scam Goddess!

01:09:12.380 I'm Hamza.

01:09:13.060 And I'm Martin.

01:09:13.640 And we're the hosts of Out of Character,

01:09:15.020 the best podcast in the world.

01:09:16.900 It's really funny and a good time.

01:09:18.460 Wait, really?

01:09:18.940 Yeah, yeah.

01:09:19.420 I think statistics just came back,

01:09:21.460 and we're one of the funniest two guys with mics,

01:09:23.720 and that's pretty hard to beat right now.

01:09:25.600 but it's true, actually.

01:09:27.100 Why should people listen to us?

01:09:28.460 Tell them.

01:09:28.880 Well, we're trendy.

01:09:29.780 We're funny.

01:09:30.360 We're topical.

01:09:31.100 You get all your news here.

01:09:32.260 Not, you know, the facts,

01:09:33.520 but maybe our takes on it

01:09:35.040 and everything in between.

01:09:36.560 So listen out of character

01:09:37.860 on the iHeartRadio app,

01:09:39.500 Apple Podcasts,

01:09:40.340 or wherever you get your podcasts.

Impaulsive with Logan Paul - May 09, 2023

Jeff Wittek Joins IMPAULSIVE, Logan Paul Reveals Shocking UFO Video, Suing Nate Diaz

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