jonnyrawton - FAFO w⧸Jonny and Sarah

00:00:00.000 live just like that that works just like that it's like yeah here we are the magic here i'm

00:00:08.820 wondering though there's no chat but we'll see about that my laptop's doing some weird things

00:00:13.900 i don't oh i don't know what's going on oh suddenly you can't see the chat that's not helpful

00:00:19.980 well we'll see i don't know if anybody has chatted so that's another all right i just

00:00:24.320 remember what's up everybody who's here somebody chat in the chat so we can see if there's

00:00:28.760 anything on the chat we're just here to fuck around and find out it's friday night why not

00:00:34.220 yeah just finished work for the day so let's see yeah i noticed uh i noticed that candace owen got

00:00:42.300 circumcised from the daily wire super fun yeah they just cut her right off always entertaining

00:00:48.320 yeah when the good things happen like that whoops well it's mutual she's gonna go off on her own you

00:00:54.320 can't you can't name the jew and be on ben shapiro's thing just doesn't work that way okay

00:01:00.520 um i can't see the chat

00:01:04.300 yeah let me see maybe i have to do it the old school way i don't know what that means though

00:01:11.860 yeah i don't know what that means either what's going on rumble what's your deal

00:01:16.700 rumble what the fuck yeah right

00:01:19.460 okay i'm gonna put something in the chat and see if it comes up on there okay i need to go there it

00:01:26.860 is okay all right we're good i guess okay what's up why i don't know it's weird i don't know why it

00:01:35.460 does the weird things anyway i don't know i was moving my cursor around it was like highlighting

00:01:40.280 everything on my screen i'm like what are you doing why are you doing this to me mine did that the

00:01:46.220 other night when i had rumble open anytime i moved my mouse it was like it yeah like it highlighted

00:01:51.460 everything like i was trying to copy and paste it so that was weird a little bit a little bit so

00:01:56.840 yeah so what's going on talk about i don't know what's up i don't know i said let's go live so i said

00:02:03.320 let's go i said i'm bored uh well yeah i'm bored too i was i was did uh spent the morning started

00:02:09.580 watching tofu and then i fucking got the idea to do my kitchen nightmares video well you should play

00:02:17.460 that so i was in uh yeah we'll get to that in a minute okay because that is we'll work on that

00:02:22.000 anyway we'll get there that it it worked out i mean there's still some spots in it that i don't like

00:02:26.740 i gotta go back to the program i used to use because the one i am using um seems it's either too

00:02:33.680 basic or i'm just having a very difficult time uh figuring out where everything is in this program

00:02:41.500 so i need uh i need to go back just like the immigrants send them all back oh yes super huge

00:02:50.240 all of them all of them with a catapult five dollars okay we could charge tickets for this this

00:02:56.500 would be a great event i'm sure that it would probably it would probably fix the debt if we were

00:03:01.700 to do it this way and that is charge it five dollars to pull a lever and you can fling them

00:03:09.700 towards whatever country of origin five dollars i feel like we could pay people to fling them though

00:03:16.980 because i feel like people i think i think people would pay to do this i know i would pay to be the

00:03:23.540 guy that pulls the lever to fucking shoot the catapult and watch i also think i also really think

00:03:30.160 that my idea of of telling them that they're going to see a presentation and give them some

00:03:36.000 free things like those team bags we used to get yeah they lied to bring them you know like here's

00:03:42.240 yeah here's like a you know a phone card and a water or something i don't know what do they give

00:03:48.640 people now and then phone card and water i don't know i don't know here's a phone card and some water

00:03:54.320 come and see our presentation yes it is across the tarmac no no don't worry just find yourself a seat

00:04:00.000 it's okay that the doors are closing don't you worry about a thing yeah buckle up thank you for

00:04:04.560 flying we're sending you fucking back hold on tight right it wouldn't be so bad it really

00:04:14.640 wouldn't but i'm eating candy oh yeah i'm almost embarrassed but then i know that you've had

00:04:21.280 sour keys for dinner like at least five nights this week and i did not well okay it was not five nights

00:04:26.240 it was two let's get it right but yes i did i did eat sour keys for a couple of days there yes

00:04:33.760 this is the beauty of being unsupervised well all right pluses and minuses i guess we take the good

00:04:41.120 with the bad yeah whatever it worked out for me i mean connor was with his dad so he got fed that

00:04:47.840 way and i didn't have to make dinner i could just eat a bag of fucking sour keys it's a good time

00:04:55.760 i bought some sour keys the other day and they weren't good they were hard yeah they're not

00:05:00.160 i was really i was not impressed i mean what am i going to do with hard sour keys yeah you need flaccid

00:05:05.360 sour keys they have to be that's the only time that i really i'm going to agree with that one they got

00:05:10.480 to be sour and flaccid what it's way too early for your shit is it though i guess it's happy hour

00:05:22.720 i guess i should pour myself another drink then it is happy hour so i guess okay here we go you ready

00:05:28.880 i'm gonna smile wait like i'm gonna try and have a real smile

00:05:32.480 i can't even pretend it looks so stupid when i try and pretend smile oh boy happy hour like listen

00:05:47.760 to you saying it's too early for my shit you're the one who said let's go live well you you i guess

00:05:53.280 i i guess i walked into that one didn't i'm around my is going to be around too

00:05:57.520 i have to just know this now i don't even know why i think it's not gonna happen

00:06:03.120 it's just gonna happen where's the light there's the light this camera is just really it's really

00:06:07.840 weird and rumble i just can't wrap my head around it it's like zoomed in yeah why is it so close like

00:06:14.800 i feel like there's a lot of things that people don't need to see like can everybody see my pores

00:06:19.120 are they good why is my computer being retarded how's my skin

00:06:23.280 like again it just keeps highlighting everything like i feel like somebody in the chat should tell

00:06:30.160 me if my if my like i have bad makeup on or something because i feel like they can see

00:06:34.320 everything no i don't think that that

00:06:40.000 no and these are doing anything so now it doesn't nope this is it this is what we get

00:06:45.120 all right well everybody gets the extreme close-up then of us i guess apparently i never wanted that for

00:06:50.480 anyone but i'm sorry guys i'll have to we'll have to investigate other methods it's just i like

00:06:56.160 this because it's a lot easier for loading clips up i just don't understand why my laptop at the moment

00:07:02.240 has decided that when i move the cursor around it's just gonna highlight everything and for no apparent

00:07:10.160 reason at all it's pretty stupid i can't help you because i don't even know what i'm doing half

00:07:16.160 the time with my phone let alone my computer uh oh what did i do oh yeah you're probably in trouble

00:07:26.320 you're you're generally unsupervised so yeah i don't know what happened there i just clicked on

00:07:31.680 something apparently what'd you do nothing my laptop is going really weird it's tunnel juice i swear to god

00:07:40.240 or our friendly neighborhood ceases whoever or it's dirty and i need to clean it and it's just pushing

00:07:48.320 stuff oh well here's what it is did you figure it out no not at all

00:07:58.640 no not at all everything i try to do it just highlights everything on my screen right now it is

00:08:04.240 the weirdest thing ever i definitely didn't set my hair long enough because it's like

00:08:12.000 really really fluffy sorry for the floofy hair everyone we didn't have time to set it so maybe

00:08:18.560 i'll set it now because i don't really care and you're the one who said let's go live so i was like

00:08:24.480 yeah well i also said that i needed time because you know and i look well i let you set it so there you

00:08:31.680 go why is this being so stupid can you figure it out i can i'm working on it i just don't understand

00:08:43.600 why all right well you do that i'm gonna roll a joint and what's everybody doing tonight is there

00:08:49.200 anything going on tonight uh it's great it's a friday i would assume that rage would i would assume so

00:08:55.600 it is a friday yeah apparently the chat is not actually updating to what is actually oh no there

00:09:01.840 it is okay never mind current says she was driving and missed out on commenting on my shit

00:09:09.200 and him being unsupervised yeah well i'm always unsupervised somebody's getting fired in the

00:09:14.080 government for that one see like okay what is going on this is what happens when i'm totally left

00:09:22.240 unsupervised i make commercials for television shows let's see if this will work so i'm told

00:09:29.520 that everything's it's partially for me partially i mix it with cheese whiz are you joking with me right

00:09:35.920 now it's a very modern updated barbecue yes it's more like a torture rack for food a torture rack for food

00:09:43.520 he's not joking now in my book i think that's well done now that is the most disgusting way i've ever

00:09:50.560 seen good ingredients bastardized he might as well open a greasy spoon and serve egg and chips because

00:09:56.160 that's disgusting how can you serve that it's like it's been left for days and it's been attacked by cats

00:10:05.680 kitchen nightmares returns monday september 25th on fox

00:10:18.640 there you go gordon ramsay goes to haiti

00:10:26.320 well done sir all right this is what happens when they leave me unsupervised it's time well spent i think

00:10:32.080 though i feel like that was it was it was well done i had a lot of fun with that one i feel like

00:10:38.960 that one's gonna get some traction for sure we'll see we'll see that was a good one though i had fun

00:10:45.360 it definitely uh it's cute i mean i like it yeah well it took forever to find any of those clips

00:10:53.680 that was that was the well i'm sure that they're pretty hard to find on the internet right now they

00:10:58.560 really were i had to rely on a on a couple people for that uh liquid zoo namely uh she got me the the

00:11:06.240 one that i really needed and uh derek also fucking came through with uh with one i needed too so that

00:11:13.120 worked out let's see so what's greasy monkey saying they fire people in the government i don't know did

00:11:21.760 they i doubt it talking about the vote of non-confidence i really doubt that that's

00:11:29.280 i think we're talking about somebody getting fired for you not for you being unsupervised

00:11:33.520 they should be yeah and they also gave me a kid so i mean consider that

00:11:38.400 legit they just gave them to me right yeah there's definitely some issues with decision

00:11:50.400 making within our forces of probably for sure yeah i would agree with you on that if ever there

00:11:56.800 was a need for change it's that it's that yeah right that that shows you the just straight depravity

00:12:03.440 of our government and the non-thinking in their decisions that's what that is agreed

00:12:14.720 although we have fun and i i i was i was just i'm definitely gonna do this

00:12:19.920 um i was discussing it i think it was on island jason's though i'm gonna teach connor how to take

00:12:25.440 sweet chin music and then i'm gonna hit him with it in the grocery store

00:12:33.440 right we were talking actually me and connor we're talking about this last night okay right

00:12:40.000 and i pitched him the idea i think he's on board

00:12:46.160 i think he thinks it's funny um i think you should maybe not be teaching or whatever

00:12:52.160 what are you talking about this is awesome this is going to be absolutely fucking wicked now i just got

00:12:57.920 to find somebody that's going to come along and videotape this for us but it will be absolutely

00:13:04.400 hilarious right we'll just be walking along picture it right now in the fucking giant tiger or some

00:13:11.520 shit right right there in the fucking produce aisle you know like he can start like going on me about how

00:13:17.920 we want some fucking candy or some stupid shit and then i can just out of nowhere bam sweet chin music

00:13:24.720 right and then he's gonna sell it and sell it hard right it'll be great

00:13:44.000 right

00:13:46.080 that'd be hilarious come on i feel like i feel like we have different ideas surrounding what's funny

00:13:51.360 sometimes that might be one of those times i think that would be absolutely hilarious i've been

00:14:00.240 practicing on the christmas tree all right legitimately i see that you find this funny

00:14:07.120 i do and i'm just saying i'm looking to find a way to make this work where i can hit him with the

00:14:13.360 switching music where he doesn't like he gets his hands up and i don't really actually make contact

00:14:18.080 right make sure it's all done good and to the t and then he's just gotta sell it maybe we can find

00:14:25.840 like somewhere where there's like i don't know something soft he can jump into that'd be great

00:14:31.520 um and boom people think i kicked him in the head it'll be hilarious

00:14:36.080 i just don't see how this is all right i'm gonna i'm gonna trust you on this one

00:14:47.440 make sure that we get i guess okay it could it could be funnier if i add somebody in a striped

00:14:52.320 shirt that comes in and counts the one two three and then that way everybody knows i didn't actually

00:14:56.960 just kick him sure i mean that's gonna make the situation oodles better oodles

00:15:07.920 well actually no one through so i have i'm thinking i'm thinking it through right now i

00:15:13.440 see this i'm glad that we're doing this together i've figured it out i hit it with i hit him with

00:15:18.320 that sweet chin right he flies back and sells it but then sits up like the fucking undertaker

00:15:26.960 yeah and it gets low blow there you go okay but i still stand behind the um

00:15:40.960 we have different ideas of what is funny

00:15:46.720 yeah grocery store wrestling it'd be kind of funny i'm just gonna pour my drink

00:15:51.440 and choked to death yeah i was gonna say you all right there you're gonna live

00:16:03.040 yes i feel like i feel like i shouldn't quit smoking

00:16:09.200 did you say you shouldn't have quit smoking yeah i feel like

00:16:12.400 i definitely don't cough as much when i smoke

00:16:20.720 yeah yeah i don't i haven't noticed a difference yet so i don't know

00:16:26.960 it just needs to stop being cold and snowy so i can smoke cigarettes instead of whatever this

00:16:35.680 is because this is stupid i don't even care i just don't want it to be snowy

00:16:41.440 well yeah but i don't stand outside and smoke cigarette in the snow

00:16:44.800 well i just don't want it to be snowy period global warming and all that let's contribute more

00:16:50.720 tax me harder daddy well never mind that tax just like let's warm this up like at least a few more

00:17:00.480 degrees tax bullshit what well i'm a little bit confused i think i may because i haven't paid

00:17:06.880 attention to that which i perhaps should have the um uh the carbon tax that's going up on april 1st

00:17:16.720 because i know that's happening and i know it's going up by a significant amount but pp's gonna

00:17:21.360 spike the hike okay but wait a second why are people saying that they get money back

00:17:28.720 do you get money back for a carbon some people do yes some people will because there is like a there

00:17:35.680 is a carbon tax like rebate kind of deal that um i think like depending on what your income level is

00:17:42.720 is you would get a certain amount back i mean i don't think that it in any way

00:17:52.800 makes any sense but um i do believe that like if you are a certain

00:18:00.000 tax bracket then you would get it'd be like part of your credits okay part of your tax credits maybe

00:18:06.560 interesting something like that oh just go to my taxes

00:18:13.120 yeah but yeah other than that i'm not really i mean the carbon tax doesn't make a whole lot of

00:18:18.320 fucking sense anyway so i i don't really pay attention to it well right that's what i'm saying

00:18:25.360 like i knew like yeah i should probably look into a couple of things

00:18:28.640 yeah but i'm pretty sure just like gst or fucking

00:18:35.200 like uh whatever what are some of the other ones

00:18:39.840 i know in ontario we got like trillium and like a bunch of other fucking stupid ones too but yeah

00:18:46.080 right but it would come just like that but it would depend on what your income is as to how much

00:18:50.800 you're gonna get let's see and i'm sure that it in no way makes up for the rise in inflation

00:18:59.360 it's like i remember when they had a uh what was it a rental credit and it's like if you paid rent

00:19:04.400 anywhere you could apply for this credit and because basically they were admitting

00:19:10.480 they were admitting that you know rent is too damn high and it's really hard for you to live

00:19:15.840 playing paying your rent so don't worry guys we got your back and they gave you 500 bucks

00:19:26.080 awesome that just fixed everything right there right there your 500 bucks just fixed it all we're

00:19:30.880 awesome thanks that's crazy yeah no stupid is what it is but yeah that doesn't make sense yeah it's like

00:19:39.360 what was the point of that other than to make people think you did something it's like when your

00:19:45.280 grandma used to give you five dollars in your birthday card yeah and you were like

00:19:51.200 or or your grandma figured out that you would take your gift certificates

00:19:56.320 or your money and go and buy like alcohol or something so she started giving you gift certificates

00:20:03.520 yeah that was terrible

00:20:04.640 terrible

00:20:08.560 it was

00:20:12.240 until i figured out you just go in buy like something really cheap and just get the change

00:20:17.760 that worked but anyway

00:20:21.280 well isn't it kind of like in the government programs for addicts they give them

00:20:26.880 gift cards for groceries and things like that and then they go to those cash for less places and cash in the

00:20:34.560 gift cards for half of what they're worth that's probably true and then go back and then buy drugs

00:20:39.360 from the government

00:20:40.480 it's either that or they just straight up trade their fucking cards for it because that's possible

00:20:45.440 like there's like that's the thing like uh it's funny how

00:20:52.400 resourceful and hard-working addicts can be

00:20:56.640 when it comes to the addiction oh sure um it's it's an interesting thing that's what i'm saying

00:21:04.800 like they'll go to all the different food banks and get grocery cards for 25 dollars and then before

00:21:09.520 they know it they've got you know 200 worth of grocery cards and then they go to one of those

00:21:15.760 cash money places on the corner where they charge you know like 46 percent interest on your thousand dollar

00:21:23.200 payday loan and then they will trade in your cards for i think it's like

00:21:31.040 anywhere from like 35 to 55 percent of what they're worth or something like it's ridiculous what they give you for them

00:21:38.000 yeah and then they sell them for what they're worth yeah man it's it those those places it is actually

00:21:49.200 really ridiculous though how that works i've never like if you look into those places and stuff too like

00:21:55.520 it's crazy how those places still exist yeah i went once so um but the only reason i went

00:22:03.200 it's because i was like well i'm not gonna pay it back so you're hilarious yeah no i that like

00:22:13.680 there's a couple of things that i've that i have just never i there are certain things i've just never

00:22:21.920 i would never do yeah no that's one way they should be illegal really like yeah totally i'd never pawn my

00:22:28.560 jewelry i'd never do that yeah especially because once you do it like if you do end up doing it it's

00:22:36.880 so fucking hard to get out of it to get out of it well that's the thing right like yeah that's that's why

00:22:42.880 it's something i would never yeah i'd never get into that yeah yeah something that i just there's no

00:22:50.880 i don't have a gray area there it's just like if you come after my family

00:22:58.560 who i consider my family oh you better fucking run i'm like the guy in taken i will fuck i'll find you

00:23:08.480 yes typically the way i take that yeah yeah absolutely 100 percent

00:23:14.720 damn it that's what i forgot to do for me

00:23:19.440 i should have went and got cream i did yeah i didn't and i listened to tofu when i was doing it

00:23:25.280 it was great i just i couldn't i couldn't supervise the chat but i was still listening and it was

00:23:29.520 really funny i i definitely lost track of what i was doing a couple of times in the stores because i

00:23:35.760 was like and then i was like in the seasonal aisle and was like oh my god there's so many great things

00:23:41.520 for my backyard see that's how i am every time i go in there like the last time i went grocery shopping

00:23:48.240 the lady looks at me and i mean i must have had the look of i have no fucking idea what i'm doing

00:23:55.760 on my face um because she just took one look at me she's like uh sir do you need help and i just

00:24:03.280 looked over at her i was like uh if you plan on helping me we're probably gonna be here all

00:24:08.160 i need a lot of help and there's none of it you can help me with so yeah like just you know i'll

00:24:16.640 figure it out um just there you go and leave me wander i remembered to get what i needed though

00:24:24.160 and i didn't really get anything extra a couple things but nothing crazy sometimes candy i definitely

00:24:31.040 wanted chips and i definitely needed rolling papers and cream this like literally when i go to the grocery

00:24:37.840 store this is howard grocery shop i don't make a list i just go with what i believe that i'm there

00:24:44.800 for so it's like i do lunch shit or dinner shit excuse me what did you just say you go to the grocery

00:24:54.400 store without a bucket list yes do you also not jack the flyers

00:25:01.520 yes i'm sorry are you a fucking psychopath who even does that who are you bill gates can you

00:25:14.080 afford everything in the grocery store no i just write a list that is chaos it's chaos in the grocery

00:25:21.120 store if you don't go in there with a list how do you even cook because i just go in and i look at

00:25:27.920 stuff no right no no i look at stuff and i just you know i know there's things that i know how to make

00:25:38.320 right so i look for the things that i know how to make and whatever's on sale in that particular time

00:25:45.200 i'll grab that up but yeah i just wander around and throw shit in my cart literally no way that you go

00:25:53.040 into the grocery store to do your shopping oh i can't handle this yeah no i i yeah without a list

00:26:00.080 who else does this in the chat y'all put into one if you don't go with a list i just i go in

00:26:06.880 and i just i have something in mind like i need lunch shit or i need dinner shit or i need lunch and

00:26:13.920 dinner shit grocery shopping without a fucking list to do it with like i don't understand that's chaos my

00:26:19.920 cart would just be full i'd be like i want this i want this oh my god i'm gonna get this

00:26:24.560 i would walk out of there when i do that listen like i just for the record if i do go into the

00:26:28.880 grocery store without a list it is exactly chaos and then i end up getting home going what the

00:26:33.920 fuck am i gonna eat that happens sometimes um like i end up with like whipped cream in a can and

00:26:41.040 fucking cheese it's what if i don't have a list because then i'm like oh my god that is a cool

00:26:46.160 flavor of cheese it's i wonder what that tastes like well yeah i just like coconut whipped cream

00:26:51.920 in a can you should probably get that too well see i'm not lee you know what happens when i go to

00:26:58.320 the grocery store without a list because i've sent you pictures of me unsupervised in the grocery store

00:27:02.160 and it is like it's not okay yeah well i mean for me it depends right like hey if i go in stoned i'm

00:27:12.000 fucked all right if i go in stoned like i guarantee you that i am not going to get what i grocery

00:27:18.800 store do you think well i cannot i cannot go in there baked listen i'm not going to rob dog the

00:27:23.360 grocery store at any point i'm definitely going to smoke a joint before i do that no i gotta go in

00:27:28.000 there without the marijuana influence because if i had the marijuana influence it's all fucking cookies

00:27:33.200 chips and chocolate and i'm not gonna get any actual food i have walked out and i think there

00:27:42.080 might be more than one person in the chat that can attest to this i have walked out of the grocery

00:27:46.240 store with not one not two but more than that flavors of the deep and delicious uh cakes yeah

00:27:52.560 because i was like oh yeah no me me and the grocery store like if i go in stoned then i am going to

00:28:01.040 like that's when i'm like just shoving shit in my cart right if i don't go in stoned i at least have

00:28:08.560 somewhat of a plan in my mind right like i know about what i want to spend and i know

00:28:14.000 that i'm here for dinner shit or i'm here for lunch shit right and i have chocolate too and it sucked

00:28:21.520 i was so disappointed i don't even know what the fuck that is you know what making your own

00:28:26.480 chocolate with just like raw cacao and then some coconut oil with a little bit of fresh vanilla is

00:28:33.440 way better and then you can put your own shit in it then whatever the heck that keto garbage is i

00:28:37.600 swear to god because it tastes like so weird it's so weird i bought a keto protein bar by the steak the

00:28:43.680 other day what the fuck yeah it tasted like there's not a lot of things that i don't like in the world

00:28:54.000 alfredo sauce not a fan nope can't do it it's just weird i don't understand why you would do that

00:29:03.120 what like there's nothing there's so many things wrong about it that i'm not even going to get into

00:29:08.240 it the other thing is the keto flavored things that are flavored with something like whatever those

00:29:17.040 weird fake sugary things are and it's like it doesn't make it taste like anything other than

00:29:23.600 whatever the sugar substitute is that you're using so it's just like when somebody says it's gluten

00:29:28.160 free it's so good fuck off it's so good it's gluten free it tastes like fucking garbage

00:29:34.880 fuck it's just like the meatless oh the meatless you know meat tastes like the same when somebody

00:29:41.200 gives you like a vegan spaghetti sauce and you're like it's the same and you're like get fucked it's

00:29:45.520 not the same it doesn't taste the same as lamb or fucking veal tell me that fucking vegan meat

00:29:51.680 tastes the same as fucking lamb and yeah actually in the mouth it's funny because i was like it was

00:29:57.280 on the vine i was seeing a vegan uh like i don't know like a couple probably two years ago and you

00:30:04.000 know how you know she's a vegan because she tells you every five minutes yeah exactly um but she made me

00:30:08.800 a lasagna that i i just threw it in my freezer um like she told me that she used like real meats

00:30:19.120 um but i just threw it in my freezer and never ever ever ever ever touched it because i didn't trust

00:30:26.240 that she used real meats i'm not eating that fucking thing and again like it's like she wasn't totally

00:30:34.240 vegan she was you know she she has some protein there's certain types of vegans right there's

00:30:42.800 ethical vegans there's and all the different types of whatever yeah that's yeah that's where i was

00:30:50.000 going um i mean whatever don't even get me started it's ridiculous it's an animal byproduct so i mean

00:30:56.640 really what is semen yeah like dick yeah i guess so my product right well they can't they shouldn't

00:31:08.080 be able to swallow i guess technically i think i don't know that's why i don't i guess i don't know

00:31:18.960 these questions are above my pay grade i don't know well i guess i never have to worry about being

00:31:23.520 a full-blown bacon then we're good i wouldn't be anyway like i couldn't i couldn't even do vegetarian

00:31:30.720 it's too much work

00:31:34.080 listen i've dabbled in different types of cuisines

00:31:40.800 patient

00:31:43.200 i know

00:31:43.920 i do enjoy a good barbecue however not for me i prefer jamaican barbecue right like the jerk

00:31:54.560 chicken rather than the um person on a spit

00:32:01.840 rather than leg of human yeah jerk chicken always makes me laugh but

00:32:06.960 why that's because i'm like 12 oh

00:32:12.560 like asking for a chicken breast

00:32:15.360 but that that's not as funny it's just

00:32:19.120 but jerk chicken is funny for you yeah that's a little

00:32:22.080 just so we're i just want to make sure i know what level of funny we're at

00:32:26.000 yeah well i guess probably because chicken breast is used so often so it's just meh but jerk chicken

00:32:31.360 you don't hear that every day and you know jerking your chicken it's just it's 12 year old humor

00:32:36.880 what can i say it never left me videos when they do the

00:32:44.720 do the songs with the chickens oh that made me so happy yeah see that's what happens with my brain

00:32:51.520 that's where my brain goes this is why it takes me so long to get to the grocery store without a

00:32:54.800 list can you imagine how chaotic it is look i can't even tell you i'm i mean i'm not gonna say

00:32:59.600 it is not chaotic when i go in because again i don't know what the fuck i'm doing i'm just

00:33:03.840 do you remember that saturday night live skit with uh uh married to uh tom cruise blonde hair um

00:33:13.440 eyes wide shut australian what's her name help me uh

00:33:18.960 fucking which one jesus she was like attached to the

00:33:23.520 fucking it was mike myers and nicole kidman and they were at the playground

00:33:28.320 what's what i can do and they were like one of them was like super hyper and attached to the

00:33:32.640 playground oh my god i feel like that is my brain nicole kidman thank you it was like that's my brain

00:33:38.640 when i tried to go to the grocery store yeah i mean like i said i'm not gonna say that isn't chaotic

00:33:46.160 um but i think that chaos is where i thrive and i don't know i just get in there and i'm like i

00:33:53.520 literally just go through all of the aisles with my cart just wandering around staring at stuff and

00:34:01.360 then i'm like oh i like that or oh i can make that or oh that's cheap i definitely i go in with a list

00:34:12.880 i definitely go to i i have to buy things that are on sale otherwise it makes me mental

00:34:20.880 so i focus but i'm just cheap i'm just i'm fucking straight up cheap yeah but it's like a game to see

00:34:26.800 how much you can save like it is a fucking i try to save more than i spend i don't i don't give a

00:34:33.520 fuck about that i just figure out what i can do that well i'm on a budget so so am i but i i don't

00:34:40.800 i don't can i don't look at how much is saved i just simply look at this is how much i have

00:34:47.120 and i need to make that fucking stretch so how can i do that and that's i think in terms of meals

00:34:54.400 in terms of you know how many days i need to get through and like what i gotta you know how many meals

00:35:01.120 do i have to make before i'm getting money again and then i think about that yeah but that's why

00:35:06.240 i go through the flyers first yeah and then i go to the sales section and then i'm like okay it's too

00:35:11.040 much work we got because there's always a section where they have like the stuff that's like whatever

00:35:18.000 i'll just go and i'll figure it out yeah i can't do that that's what i'm saying i can't do that

00:35:23.600 i have to go with like a vision and i have to actually go with a list see i don't i don't plan

00:35:29.520 because plans are always fucked right the only only time i'm going in with a plan is when i need

00:35:34.880 like cat food or cat litter then i'm like okay this is what i need but plans don't always get

00:35:39.920 fucked that's the thing you have to realize listen we're not gonna are we gonna go there now you want

00:35:44.720 to go back plans plans are like that girl with daddy issues at prom they always get fucked linda the whole

00:35:52.720 thing is you have to not if we're talking about plans and disappointment listen don't put expectations

00:36:04.160 and then you won't get disappointed whiskey girl i want to figure out the canadian couponing listen i

00:36:10.080 tried to do that and i'll tell you one thing it's irritating as f because in order to get most of the

00:36:17.440 coupons in order excuse me for it to be like um what's it called yeah beneficial you have to like

00:36:24.880 join all the coupon clubs and stuff and then it costs money and then it's like well i'm not spending

00:36:29.920 like i'm not hoarding the stuff i just want to be able to like spend money so that way i just use

00:36:35.520 the flash food app because that is dope and then i use like and then i just coupon like i see what's on

00:36:41.840 sale and then you can go in and get yeah flip that's what i use for to check and see what's on

00:36:46.720 sale but then you can also look and see in the store when i go to see if there's anything on sale

00:36:52.640 and that might change when i'm buying based on if something is on sale more with the coupons that are

00:36:56.960 there that you can like pull down but usually the coupon places like where you have to join to get the

00:37:01.840 coupon sent to you and stuff is sometimes like sometimes they can be good but legitimately it's only if

00:37:08.400 you're buying a decent amount of stuff there's a couple people that i used to follow on like

00:37:13.600 social media accounts because they were really good at it but again i've just always seen that

00:37:19.040 as too much goddamn work well yeah if you have the time to do it that's the other thing right like if

00:37:24.480 you have the time to go through and like clip all the coupons and go through the different websites

00:37:28.080 and or i got the time i just don't care like i just want to like first of all i absolutely

00:37:35.120 fucking hate grocery shopping i hate the grocery store um so when i'm there i'm just like all i

00:37:43.920 want to do is figure out what the fuck do i need to eat for this week and get the fuck out that's it

00:37:50.400 that's all i'm doing you guys have to you gotta see it more as a fucking challenge i put my fucking

00:37:54.480 headphones in i put on my favorite freaking playlist and i'm just like yeah i danced through the grocery

00:37:59.120 store with my list and i'm like this is on sale you know it's funny it's funny because i'm cheap

00:38:04.960 as fuck okay i am i really am um but nothing would piss me off more than when i was dating a

00:38:15.840 girl would get up to the cash register we're fucking checking shit out and she would start

00:38:20.480 fucking like price matching shit and it's like because now it takes longer to get the

00:38:29.120 fuck out of here yeah but you're saving money that's the whole point of price but i want out

00:38:34.560 well then go wait in the fucking car get a coffee i'm not allowed to do that well you are allowed to

00:38:39.200 do anything now because you're unsupervised yes i'm unsupervised so it's good right but

00:38:43.920 that was my time is like god damn it really we have to sit here like an extra five minutes so you

00:38:48.160 can just fucking price check everything like i'll call you when i'm done and you can meet me with the

00:38:52.240 car at the front yeah right i mean come on always annoyed me i just hated it because i'm like i just

00:38:57.600 want out of here just pay whatever the hell they want and let's get out of here yeah if i'm grocery

00:39:02.400 shopping with somebody else i find it's one of those things where it's like just make it fun like make

00:39:06.720 it enjoyable yeah you know well i'll say if i i will i will admit with somebody else is a little more

00:39:12.640 fun as long as i'm not the one who's in fucking control and no self-checkouts i don't support that

00:39:18.240 bullshit no i never go to self-checkout yeah no i do not care i will fucking i will wait in line

00:39:24.240 see here's the idiot idiosyncrasies with me right i'm cheap but i fucking hate price matching

00:39:30.080 because i want to get out of there but i will wait if it means fucking using the self-checkout

00:39:35.600 right that's the that's the fucking flow chart here i went to two grocery stores yesterday to go

00:39:41.520 and get something that was on sale and it wasn't i wasn't out of my way it was because i was in the

00:39:46.320 in that same area and both times i went to go to the cashiers they were lined up with like 10 people

00:39:54.080 and they were like come over here and i'll check you out so a lady was checking me out at the self

00:39:58.000 checkout and both times the things that i were trying was trying to get were not coming up as

00:40:03.280 being on sale so i was like nope i'm good and she's like i can just go back and price check i'm like

00:40:07.920 nope not waiting i'm good and i just walked out like why would you like why would you

00:40:14.560 know that is the most irritating thing ever if you can't call for a price check

00:40:21.600 you have to leave and say i don't have time for you to leave what you're doing to go and find

00:40:25.200 something that you don't even know where it is get out of here i don't have time for your no

00:40:30.720 and yes i have used checkout 51 i have it on my phone i've used it and i've actually got

00:40:36.160 i've actually got money back from it so that's another one you can use things like

00:40:40.400 it's a it's an app where if you purchase things uh you like upload the receipt um not the whole

00:40:47.440 receipt just the portion that they they it needs to show that you've purchased it and sometimes it's

00:40:52.880 at a certain place um and then what basically what it is is it's like brand marketing so certain stores

00:41:01.520 or whatever are trying to increase their traffic flow and stuff or certain brands are trying to

00:41:05.360 get new products out there or um increase whatever and basically what they do is they will put incentives

00:41:12.000 through this app and the app will pay the customers for purchasing through them so once you hit like

00:41:21.840 twenty dollars you can you can cash it out and they just e-transfer you um to the email that you have

00:41:28.800 set up with the app or uh you can just keep going and then cash out anytime but it's pretty cool

00:41:34.880 like it's like lcbo stuff and it's you know like everything like all the grocery stores hardware

00:41:40.480 stores it's pretty neat so and you don't actually have to do anything except for like just you know

00:41:48.640 like i said upload upload your receipt from your regular shopping most of the time what getting getting

00:41:54.560 bought accounts trying to add me on the facebook machine that's exciting yeah that's always good

00:42:00.480 well actually i do like when that happens though because my my first thing is to go straight to

00:42:06.000 the mutual like friends and who actually accepted it just so i can be like you dummies

00:42:16.640 oh i used to actually though i used to accept every single one of them just so i could

00:42:20.480 fuck with them though makes sense that was actually kind of i should go back to doing that

00:42:25.360 they were entertaining oh oh my god

00:42:35.200 how do you know when you've been blocked again how does that work what do you mean how do you know

00:42:39.920 when you've been blocked on someone's phone on an iphone i would assume that your messages just

00:42:45.840 don't go through anymore right yeah i would assume so yeah i would assume that that would be the case yeah

00:42:56.160 i don't know i i don't i don't use great fucking weekend i can tell already

00:43:04.480 that reminds me too i gotta get a hold of leaf nurse make sure everything's still

00:43:08.480 oh yeah no good but it is still kind of snowing here too though yeah i guess we'll uh everything

00:43:13.920 will be uh playing it by ear it's but yeah it's still okay well i i'm i'm hoping we're still coming

00:43:20.720 though because i won't bowl damn it yeah i think uh it is ten pin though right like that i'm

00:43:26.880 see again i'm like i just it's funny because i don't i just rely on leaf nurse and like it's like

00:43:34.160 they they know what's going on so i'll just yeah she has her finger on the pulse yeah right i rely on

00:43:41.280 just jesse and then right i know that she's gonna let me know what i need to know leaf nurse is the

00:43:48.240 closest thing i have to supervision

00:43:52.880 i feel like she supervises you quite well that's well when when she's where she can

00:43:57.360 like when she's in when she's in a supervisional role yes

00:44:03.920 yeah i would i would have to say that i would probably just listen

00:44:12.080 terrified oh cooter's waking up oh yeah where's the crotch goblin he's outside oh in the snow yeah

00:44:22.640 that makes sense yeah him and his buddies are playing in the snow so yeah get out there i mean

00:44:28.320 fuck that's what he's supposed to be doing he's a he's a kid well and i try to like he does obviously

00:44:34.560 have a tablet because his dad's an idiot um but yeah but it's snowing outside go make some forts but

00:44:41.680 yeah like there's snowball snow too majority of the time it's like he gets home and the first question

00:44:48.880 is can i go outside i'm like all right go out there then you know whatever you want to run out

00:44:55.440 there and play with your buddies i'd much rather that sure yeah have at her makes a hell of a lot

00:45:00.400 more sense and then that way the the tablet is more so for when he comes in and you know it's like

00:45:08.160 maybe a little before the bath time and a little before bed and then there you go

00:45:11.920 oh and i wouldn't necessarily say poor leaf nurse i listen to her well

00:45:20.880 happens when you have a little fear lord have mercy oh yeah that got out of hand so fast what got

00:45:28.080 out of hand oh nothing we're out of hand all right i

00:45:32.320 oh

00:45:42.320 yeah

00:45:47.520 yep i wonder some days it's amazing to me

00:45:55.040 it's a good point we see girls push you over the fucking edge yeah well it happens you're on

00:46:02.320 she will whoop your ass if you don't listen no and i i know that

00:46:08.240 i gotta make sure that if i can what's up with breezy she's still kidnapping people or not

00:46:13.680 i think so i think so because i'm not reading i was just gonna say more people should be reading

00:46:19.520 some books so i'm not i am what was what was the one i just finished outsiders and i'm gonna read

00:46:29.360 tommy knocker oh the outsiders that is actually a book i have read now i'm doing tommy knockers

00:46:36.880 i am trying to think what the last actual book is that i finished it's really big though this is

00:46:43.120 the problem here that's what she said hang on i'm gonna show you without all right i don't think

00:46:48.320 she ever did say that i guess that's what happens in some people's cases i don't know i don't believe

00:47:00.000 that happened i don't know it's really big so it's one of those ones where it's like and it sucks

00:47:07.840 because excuse me i have arthritis in my hands so sometimes holding the book it sucks because it's

00:47:15.280 too heavy so i do have a cobo thing that i can put my books on but i can't find it i'm trying to

00:47:23.680 think of what the last book is that i actually like because i know i started reading uh what was it

00:47:29.920 that uh bob probert's biography but i only got like halfway through and stopped same with carrie

00:47:36.560 frasier's but there was one it was a road to hell the biker gangs are conquering canada that's an older

00:47:42.640 one though but it was that one was actually a really good fucking book though it was uh going

00:47:49.040 all into like the mumbuche arrests and everything that happened from that uh yeah that was that was a

00:47:56.560 really interesting book actually i'm on a stephen king kick so that's what i'm reading right now

00:48:09.360 yeah about a bunch of them i picture a bunch of them up at a book sale so no why not such a good

00:48:21.280 writer yeah yeah he's he's an idiot but he's decent writer yeah no i like his books they don't suck

00:48:30.160 i can read them pretty quickly because the stories are even though i've read them i can read them again so

00:48:36.960 that always makes me happy and there are a couple of things back there i have to go through again

00:48:43.040 because people keep testing patients i think the thing i didn't like about reading is just that it's

00:48:49.280 like super hard to read certain books in one fucking sitting so i think that's where it bugs me is it's

00:48:55.200 like i i just i want to get from start to end right i don't i don't like having to to wait

00:49:03.040 and and read more later i'm like i need it now i need it all my head was like spoken like a true

00:49:12.320 addict right yeah kind of yeah i know yeah i mean yeah i mean i don't know like i think i think it

00:49:21.040 might even be a little like i don't know what do they call that object permanence or something where

00:49:26.400 it's like if i just if i set it down it stays there it's yeah it's no longer in my mind i'm not

00:49:34.720 i'm not gonna think about it anymore it's just it doesn't exist until maybe i see it again and

00:49:43.680 want to do it but that's pretty much it yeah i mean chet watched your open i watched like

00:49:51.840 fucking six hours of that before i finally was like okay i need to i need a break right

00:50:02.000 yeah i do try to get through it all cool yeah no i could read a book easily but not i don't do it in

00:50:12.560 one setting very often yeah no probably not but but that's what i mean like that's why it's that's why

00:50:19.760 it's difficult for me to read because it's like okay like i like reading it's you know i can do it

00:50:25.200 obviously you should read like short stories then yeah maybe there's some good orwell stories that are

00:50:31.760 just fucking write some that's what i should do lots of poem books that are short like crows i could

00:50:39.680 write some short stories oh that'd be hilarious oh jesus what are you doing i don't think anybody's

00:50:48.720 i don't think anybody is ready for that but i could write children's books

00:50:58.720 no i really couldn't but

00:51:03.920 but i could i could do some books that'd be funny

00:51:10.000 i don't think i could write books well i feel like i could write a really good book however

00:51:14.000 people might not like me after it but i'm more into like writing music it's more fun

00:51:21.440 uh whiskey girl is uh says she really struggles with reading if she doesn't have my interest in the

00:51:27.840 first page or two she'll give up yeah well that see that's a tough one because it depends um

00:51:36.480 um but yeah typically if something if something's slow to start then i'm like yeah all right i check

00:51:44.960 out and then i'm done

00:51:49.920 no it's like like a tv show as an example like the first episode i'll allow to be slow

00:51:56.880 but if by the time we get to the next one and we're not getting anywhere i'm like yeah

00:52:03.600 fuck you yeah no see the first episode has to be character development and it's the same thing with

00:52:07.680 a book right yeah i'll allow slowness for the

00:52:10.320 yeah awesome i think it's gonna kill me i swear to god

00:52:23.920 swear to god that thing is gonna you could just quit

00:52:32.160 i did it

00:52:32.720 and i haven't killed anybody yet so that's a good thing i worry about humanity at large

00:52:44.000 yeah well i i was really worried about you know but it's so far so good so far so good

00:52:50.320 connor's still alive you know the cats are still alive i have cut back like i haven't had cigarettes

00:52:55.760 in two weeks i mean i i hate it because i still well yeah but i also just haven't had any at all like

00:53:11.840 no nicotine and no no supplements no well this isn't enough and that's the problem is that i still

00:53:17.920 want cigarettes yeah well so do i really like it yeah it's been a while and i'm still having that

00:53:25.760 battle of just i want to go to the store and get a pack of smokes right like it's a weird thing

00:53:32.240 because it's i don't have like the like the extreme bitchiness or anything anymore because i i would get

00:53:38.480 super fucking irritated in the first few days and it like little tiny things would cause me to

00:53:46.400 i could i could just explode at any second on something stupid um but like now i'm past that part

00:53:53.520 but i still have that like i want one yeah i want one and it's like if i smell one or somebody says

00:54:02.880 they're gonna have one i'm like okay yeah i still want one but so far so good still trying not to though

00:54:16.800 all right yeah see and that's the thing like i don't i like it like i enjoy it that's why i said like

00:54:22.080 i'm just i don't i won't smoke inside my house and it has to be i can't i'm not going to go outside

00:54:28.000 and be freezing my fucking ass off so yeah i i hate it but it's like i hate smoking but i like the act

00:54:38.160 of smoke like it was it was something that i would just do right like it's like how do i know if i'm

00:54:44.000 having a break now um i have a question whiskey did you actually actually read the 50 shades trilogy

00:54:52.640 come on right i have any i did not read the books and i i didn't see the movies either because i was

00:54:57.920 like i feel like i bet you she just read all compared to my sex life so all right all three books back to

00:55:05.280 back to back didn't even sleep had fucking just just fucking whacked out on like fucking adderall and

00:55:13.680 tea adderall and tea to read the 50 shades trilogy i doubt it and a vibrator but you know what i did

00:55:21.040 read oh my god you're hilarious you have to tell me about this oh my god look at you guys that's

00:55:26.160 hilarious okay but you know what i did read that i really liked was the um the magicians it was like

00:55:31.520 harry potter for adults i mean i read harry potter he told you i wasn't wrong no but the magicians

00:55:39.760 there's also they did a show called um like they did a show based on the books and i never watched

00:55:47.680 the show except for like a random like couple minutes of a couple few episodes you know what

00:55:52.960 i mean like i never i never watched the show because i really enjoyed the books and i didn't

00:55:57.680 want it to ruin it for me legitimately i really like that the magicians trilogy if anybody gets

00:56:03.520 a chance to read that it's it's quite good honestly really neat but i don't i i can't imagine reading

00:56:13.120 the i can't imagine can't imagine reading those no holy look at that hair oh

00:56:23.440 you need we need to get you a haircut oh my god can you get one too no damn it no no no i want you

00:56:33.600 to get a joe dirt cut like i feel like you should just get it like party down the sides here like

00:56:38.160 straight fucking mullet like a whole uh what's dana mcbride like just give her a fucking just

00:56:43.920 tight down the sides and just keep her right at the back like fucking like i mean i i would consider it

00:56:48.640 it and then you'll really look like an asshole like it'll be like full on yeah it's amazing

00:56:55.280 wear that one proudly okay i could i could i could rock that for sure yeah yeah they were cheesy but a

00:57:03.280 quick read okay well you know what karen i feel like that would be one of those things that i would

00:57:09.040 read on a um like on a vacation or something you know like if i go somewhere and i have to sit by the

00:57:15.520 pool and it's like yeah that's what yeah zio jesus got to see all right all right

00:57:24.240 what's going on in there

00:57:27.840 do you need to deal with the maybe i don't know i don't know what it is so i'm just checking just

00:57:33.120 jack i'm not sure does anybody have a

00:57:41.840 a wrench no i don't think they do oh i'm only in here as a participant rather than a

00:57:50.160 well and i think even if i make you moderator i don't think you can moderate i can't from here

00:57:54.880 now can you make whiskey a moderator uh maybe hold on hold on i'm trying to figure that out i have

00:58:03.600 no idea let me see i believe if i do that nope nope i'll figure that out give me a second

00:58:19.200 something to that effect

00:58:27.680 what are you going on about kid

00:58:31.680 oh you're hungry yeah i'm gonna make dinner soon here

00:58:36.720 what are you gonna do

00:58:37.520 oh really you would ask your dad no you're not no no definitely not actually as much as i would

00:58:50.480 like you to go have dinner with your dad i took out a bunch of ground beef so that's not gonna work

00:58:56.800 uh you know whatever i'll let you call him if you want to you can but otherwise because i guess i

00:59:08.560 could eat all that ground beef myself that is possible all right i have no idea what i'm doing

00:59:14.080 i'll have to do that after i forgot how to moderate on rumble okay

00:59:20.880 what are you making for dinner with ground beef are you making the hamburger helper uh no more than

00:59:34.240 likely i am gonna do up some spaghetti sauce and make some noodles

00:59:39.040 that is the likely scenario okay i see

00:59:48.960 actually that'll depend because if he goes and eats i might just

00:59:52.080 fucking make the ground beef and just eat the ground beef i don't care

00:59:55.360 yeah but you know what you should do do you have any do you have any tortilla shells

01:00:00.160 like the round ones no not the no no not taco shells okay no i got like nothing right now i

01:00:07.200 actually probably should have went to the grocery store today but do you have do you have buns or

01:00:12.320 bread no no i'm fresh out of that makes floppy joes yeah no okay no i'll figure something out

01:00:20.560 spaghetti sauce and pork rice that's awesome what did i have last night i had mexican rice and

01:00:29.520 oh no that was the night before last night i had those

01:00:34.640 because i forgot to eat after the gym so i ate on street i had those two wraps with alfalfa

01:00:40.720 spreads and cream cheese and then i had a couple chunks of 10 year old cheddar and some pickled beets

01:00:47.920 yeah and some grapes whoops oh yeah right that's what i should do and half of a protein bar

01:00:55.520 which i got yelled at

01:00:56.400 because i guess i guess i'm supposed to eat more i'm like in the middle of doing like a whole bunch of

01:01:04.000 things

01:01:08.960 how do i remove that

01:01:13.120 delete

01:01:17.680 okay i think that should have deleted it

01:01:19.360 maybe i don't know okay well it doesn't look like it deleted it but smoked meat and lettuce

01:01:32.880 deconstructed ribbon beautiful i am doing tortilla shells those small ones like the uh with some ground

01:01:40.720 beef on it and then you put it in the pan and then you put some little sauce on it and it's

01:01:44.640 like a hamburger and a tortilla shell kind of like a deconstructed burger

01:01:49.440 that's not good that's what i'm doing because i got some honey mustard on sale

01:01:54.080 and i just made some aioli the other night for my tacos so tacos

01:02:00.240 yeah i saw my tacos the other night so and i have a little bit of ground beef left over so i'm

01:02:04.720 gonna do something probably make a taco salad tomorrow because i got some boston lettuce that's

01:02:08.400 beautiful and delicious oh taco salad yeah koala mama wants to get matching mullets

01:02:16.720 i think you should i mean i probably would rock one actually i think that it's not a it's not a

01:02:23.200 stretch from and majority of people looking at my profile picture think i already have one so

01:02:29.360 it's hilarious how many people on twitter try to chirp me for having a mullet i'm like i don't even

01:02:35.200 have a mullet you fucking idiots but whatever okay why is this being so stupid again it's highlighting

01:02:43.360 everything i don't it's bugging me it's really bugging me there's liquid zoo once again thank you

01:02:49.200 for sending the video that i had been longing it was well it was actually what it was was i'm so glad

01:02:57.280 i don't have to hear about that video anymore well i couldn't find it and then i finally found it

01:03:03.360 but i couldn't download the video from it because the program like the thing that i use it was like

01:03:08.960 well it's a private one so it can't do it i was like and so i sent it to liquid zoo i'm like can you

01:03:14.880 download this and send it back please it's a good time i it took forever to find that one though

01:03:23.120 it's because it should take forever because it's of people being eaten what no actually

01:03:30.560 actually actually actually um technically speaking no it's not technically but i don't let facts get

01:03:42.640 in the way of a good joke um as i told liquid zoo because she was like content warning would have

01:03:48.160 been nice this early in the morning i was like oh yeah shit sorry i was like but if it's any

01:03:52.640 constellation is not actually real that's actually something that was done in china and it's like

01:03:58.400 it's a whole fake thing uh that's i mean that other clip is real though but that one's actually i

01:04:07.280 think that one's way worse cold hot dogs what's it what do you mean a cold hot dog like a not cook

01:04:13.600 yeah like you just fucking take them right out of the package no yeah why wouldn't you shut the

01:04:21.360 fuck up fuck you know what i did once shut up you do not you're gonna love this stop it just a second

01:04:29.520 wait a second back up no you're gonna love this this is a legitimate question yes the answer is yes

01:04:34.960 yes and i've done it many many times i've actually gone like me and my buddies were walking and i have

01:04:42.560 actually stopped in at a store bought a package of hot dogs and then some fucking cheese and then just

01:04:49.440 came out open the package and i would wrap each fucking wiener with fucking cheese and wieners and cheese

01:04:56.400 bud let's go

01:05:07.040 what but what do you mean it's safe they're cooked already like yeah they're pretty good you're just

01:05:14.240 when you fucking boil them or when you throw them in the microwave that's all you're doing did you just

01:05:18.480 see all right it's good to go and you're just fucking right out the package you just

01:05:28.160 fucking eat that shit but then but also don't don't take it from me um because i've also been

01:05:33.200 known to eat a raw bacon strip so

01:05:34.960 yeah there's a lot wrong and actually actually okay i think i believe and the evidence pointed to

01:05:49.360 the fact that i may or may not have eaten a pork chop

01:05:52.480 i mean i don't know for sure but there's no way you eat raw hot dogs yeah all the time

01:06:06.800 raw hot dogs all the time all the fucking time i still do it to this day

01:06:12.400 right if i start like if i'm making hot dogs for dinner

01:06:15.680 i feel like i'm in a bad nightmare right now this cannot be real it's real i'll eat

01:06:21.040 i will eat a whole fucking package of raw hot dogs i don't care

01:06:28.480 what are you i don't understand i feel like this is a joke

01:06:32.720 no i will i will eat you guys have to be joking right now

01:06:39.040 they're pre-cooked you're just heating them up

01:06:43.520 so it's just cutting a step out that's all

01:06:45.280 hot dogs are not pre-cooked yeah they're pre-cooked

01:06:57.200 those things are already cooked i feel

01:07:00.960 it's good to learn something today that i

01:07:04.720 i don't know i've eaten raw hot dogs all my life

01:07:06.720 no no all my motherfucking life like i would legitimately go do you like

01:07:12.560 fucking dip them in fucking craft peanut butter too like what the fuck um no

01:07:17.600 no don't answer that honestly that was a joke i'm not serious

01:07:22.880 like i'm not serious

01:07:25.040 no but i mean i'm just saying

01:07:27.120 like i've used i've used barbecue sauce i've used uh i've used maple syrup once um i've used um

01:07:38.080 i feel like we're going to a whole other level of like of food that i never wanted to learn about

01:07:44.080 in my entire life like i don't know why

01:07:47.760 it's right tread waves right it's a it's basically a stick of bologna so like you're good to go you can

01:07:52.560 just fucking eat that shit right but the only time i have ever had bologna was if it was fried

01:08:00.000 bologna like you fry it in the pan exactly so that it's cooked yeah but no it's already cooked

01:08:08.480 they're good no i don't understand they're good i don't know yeah like there's really zero difference

01:08:16.240 to me between bologna and a hot dog it's like this is what i'm explaining to you if i'm gonna eat

01:08:21.200 a hot dog it's gonna be cooked on the bar and if i'm gonna eat bologna it's gonna be like seared

01:08:30.560 in the pan and it comes out and it's all blackened and cooked like yeah well i'll fry i'll fry bologna

01:08:37.680 too but at the same time i understand that i cannot do it as well with a mustard and a butter all right

01:08:44.640 nope i have definitely not had that i don't have not all right who the hell was bologna sandwiches

01:08:50.720 with chips yeah but see you guys grew up i grew up different for me that meal was

01:08:59.360 like rice and plantains yeah hot dogs are smoked there you go or rice and beans hey that that's what

01:09:05.440 it is hot dogs are smoked and that's why you can just fucking eat them some hot dogs are smoked listen

01:09:11.280 don't you can't come at me listen you can't look at me right now i'm the captain now and i want you

01:09:17.280 to understand something because i know this there is no way that you were one of the people that reads

01:09:23.280 the packages in the grocery store so i can almost guarantee you sir that you have picked up a wiener

01:09:28.880 or two that were not pre-cooked so just saying yeah i've probably raw dogged it and whatever

01:09:42.800 listen you say you're still here but i bet you if you guys did a parasite cleanse to see how many

01:09:46.960 parasites are living inside your body i bet you you'd have some in your brain yeah maybe

01:09:50.960 because i'm pretty sure i've eaten a raw pork chop before too like i think anyway i think like here's

01:10:00.880 the evidence okay the evidence presented um is that he doesn't read the packages no i don't

01:10:10.640 i definitely don't and i can't say that i legitimately that you know how you know how

01:10:15.360 fucked up i was when i got that cooler from the liquor store and i took one sip of it was like

01:10:18.960 like it had aspartame and i spit it out because i didn't read the package because i was in such a

01:10:23.280 rush there is no way that i am going to put something in my body if i don't know what the

01:10:27.200 fuck is in it yeah no i don't often read that no absolutely not but like i even read the package of

01:10:32.640 the stupid candy i get so that it doesn't have all the coloring in it so that i get the ones that have

01:10:37.840 i don't want a price match i sure as fuck i'm not reading no goddamn ingredients less so i don't

01:10:42.720 care they can kill me with whatever food they can make taste good i'm shocked and shocked that people eat

01:10:48.960 raw wait oh i'll eat a raw wiener okay can you don't someone clip that first of all and secondly

01:10:57.760 nobody likes aspartame who said that oh yeah no i can't do aspartame no no it sits in your brain

01:11:05.440 cortex and fucks up your shit i just don't like it it doesn't taste good it tastes like this like

01:11:11.680 legitimately i don't give a fuck about the healthiness of things it's all about taste for me how do you like

01:11:18.240 aspartame for real though yeah i can't no no i can't stand the flavor of anything like that

01:11:25.200 and i legitimately will slam a can of coca-cola like it is and the last thing on earth legitimately

01:11:34.160 if i can get a cold ice cold can of coca-cola regular oh god that is like

01:11:42.080 yeah that's my kryptonite right there right and i know trad wife that i'm not supposed to eat raw pork

01:11:48.240 but i was really really drunk and i i still just think it like i don't know

01:11:54.960 oh saxon you're gonna die all all i know is i woke up in the morning and there was a package

01:12:00.480 on the counter that was open that had one pork chop missing from it there was a bone in the sink

01:12:07.760 and there were no dirty dishes

01:12:15.920 so there's no way i cooked it because i wouldn't put it in the microwave you fucking savage

01:12:20.880 maybe who knows i have no idea i just know that there were zero dishes

01:12:29.280 a bone and a package of just two pork chops it used to be three

01:12:38.560 lee and i went on one of our terror adventures one day and we went into this went into a jeet store

01:12:44.720 and we got these cans of it wasn't even called coca-cola but it was made by the coca-cola company

01:12:51.360 and it was like we like we we stood there in the store and we contemplated it for a bit

01:12:56.720 and we were like do we try this because it feels like we should like i feel like we should give it

01:13:02.640 a whirl and we really contemplated like what could happen to us if we did and we went over the pros and

01:13:08.400 cons of this and then we bought it then we tried it and we were like what in the

01:13:12.640 fuck it tasted so fucked up oh yeah it was so weird i would think that it would

01:13:20.640 yeah it was so weird was it even carbonated still

01:13:24.720 yes but it tasted like when you go to a restaurant and you get like the bottom of the bag of the the

01:13:32.160 fountain pop and there's like a wet fart's worth of flavor in it almost like a neutral like the neutral

01:13:41.120 drinks where the from the liquor store if you've ever had one of those it's almost like someone

01:13:45.600 sneezed a flavor you know like 500 meters away and it's like that's your flavoring now that's what i

01:13:52.240 feel like these coca-colas where it was like someone farted a coca-cola 50 feet away and then they were

01:13:57.280 like coca-cola and it was expired too yeah yep yeah it was um it was an experience yeah we we should

01:14:06.720 definitely do another adventure to that store and see what we can find and get some samosas because

01:14:12.080 those are legitimately the best samosas i've ever had in my life they're like crack

01:14:16.800 no i'm not even joking she'll she she'll agree with me i'm not even joking they're the best samosas

01:14:22.720 i've ever had in my life they are really good like so good so good trad wife over here i know how to make

01:14:30.880 super healthy food and super unhealthy food oh sure all of us know how to make an unhealthy meal

01:14:36.880 like i mean i know how to samosas were not expired they were fresh and so hot and delicious and that's

01:14:43.040 the that's the reason they're just so good i can't even tell you um the uh i do like an unhealthy meal

01:14:50.000 every once in a while i'm not gonna lie yeah every time no not not every time but i do i do have a

01:14:58.080 idea i like i like potato chips totally i like my my homemade potato chips do you do you smash a full

01:15:05.360 fucking bag in a sitting no i used to yeah i can for sure yeah 100 actually it's real pain in the deck

01:15:14.960 because uh i always buy that like bag of like little bags so that i have i can just easily

01:15:22.080 throw them in his lunch for school those fucking piss me off because there's like not even a handful

01:15:27.440 i know problem is i get all baked and when i'm done eating all my chips it is i can go into the

01:15:33.920 fucking bag there and i'm like i'll pull out like fucking four bags at once because i know it's

01:15:39.840 bullshit yeah before i know it i need to go back to the fucking grocery store for lunch

01:15:45.200 shit because i went and ate it all yeah they're bullshit but you know what's funny is that's the

01:15:49.920 way i got myself from eating like three quarters or a whole bag of chips to eating now just like a

01:15:57.520 small portion of it because i'd buy those the big boxes of those at costco and then rather than buying

01:16:02.880 the big bags of chips i'd be like okay we'll just have you know like a bag of doritos and a bag of

01:16:06.400 plain lays and call it a day and then i would you know and then now it's just like all right well

01:16:12.320 i'll have a small bowl of chips you know before i go to bed and i read my book or whatever because

01:16:18.800 i don't think about it anymore it's also because i'm not going to eat chips while i'm on the treadmill

01:16:22.320 either so if i had one in my living room then i probably would i'm not gonna lie i'd probably drink

01:16:29.120 a white claw and eat fucking cheetos while i was running on the treadmill if it was in my living room

01:16:33.920 however workout tips with sarah i do go to the gym so i feel like i'm already drawing enough

01:16:39.760 attention to myself because i look like i'm running from my life so yeah i would just stay eating the

01:16:45.440 chips fuck it no i love going to the gym it's a fucking it's a great time i'll get there get there

01:16:53.120 eventually right now i don't but yeah one thing at a time i'm still working on the the not smoking it

01:16:59.840 makes my anger not angry it makes my anger not angry all right yeah that's the thing like i

01:17:09.760 things make me people make me angry but this is true patience for stupidity and again like somebody

01:17:17.840 said to me again recently like they were like i find you a little bit intimidating and it's like

01:17:23.040 no go yourself i'm not intimidating you're intimidated there's a huge difference like what

01:17:28.960 relax get over yourself off i just don't have the patience for stupid why the one bag is why two

01:17:37.600 weeks that's that's a lie whiskey there is no way no one no that's not even normal like that's just mean

01:17:46.960 like how how two weeks wouldn't they be stale by then i feel a little bit called out right now

01:17:53.360 because i'm definitely not gonna have bag of chips the last two weeks maybe three days like two days

01:17:59.840 max like max because normally i'll end up like what i'll end up doing is i eat pretty much all of them

01:18:07.360 and then like i'll come out in the morning and there'll be like just a couple handfuls left and it's

01:18:14.000 like oh yeah right yeah right yeah i never finish anything i'm the type of person where i always

01:18:21.040 leave the bottom of something i always leave a bite i'm always i don't know why i just do that so

01:18:26.160 then i have all these bags of chips left over with chiplins in them and then i put them in one bag and

01:18:30.080 then i use them to like like make chicken tendies or something it's way it's way worse for me for

01:18:35.680 oh fuck where was i going i forgot what i was going to say there i thought i thought about

01:18:44.800 something and chips in the bottom of the bag and the stuff oh cookies that's what it is a bag of

01:18:49.200 cookies is there's no chance they stand no fucking chance if you have ever had chocolate chip cookies

01:18:55.280 with chunks of um plain ruffles in them have you ever had that what okay i make these chocolate chip

01:19:01.680 cookies and no joke i put ruffles chips in them they're fucking retarded i also make these brownies

01:19:10.320 that have chocolate uh no what is it called chocolate brownies and they have ruffles chips in them and

01:19:18.000 uh pretzels like chunks all in them they're delicious and sometimes they have mushrooms in

01:19:23.920 them as well so be careful no no i would rather it's like a choose your own adventure when you eat at my

01:19:30.720 house i i would much rather just have the ones with the mushrooms let's go yeah yeah so you know

01:19:36.960 you never know i don't know when you're at my house it's always actually it's funny speaking of eating

01:19:41.520 mushrooms i didn't i i was unawares um when i because i remember the first time i got one of them

01:19:48.320 their uh mushroom chocolate bars from the from the reserve there and i noted it i noted that it was

01:19:55.520 vegan and i was like what in the mother fuck is this bullshit uh so it turns out it's gotta be

01:20:04.320 because milk chocolate apparently reacts with the psilocybin oh yeah with psilocybin yeah yeah

01:20:10.480 i was unaware of that oh yeah totally unawares oh yeah there's there's things that i mean before you

01:20:18.720 eat them you should pay attention to yeah yeah well i wouldn't have never not wouldn't have thought of

01:20:23.840 that i'm just like oh mushrooms chocolate

01:20:30.160 everybody thought the gummies at my house after the danger cats were edibles

01:20:34.320 actually it was funny because i kept telling chris they were like after he ate like six of them

01:20:40.000 we're like yeah those are uh those are good gummies chris and he's like that's so funny

01:20:48.400 are they really and he starts like asking everybody like are those are those just regular gummies what

01:20:53.280 kind of gummies are those oh it's like he had like six of them

01:20:59.520 yeah well because it wouldn't be the first time that's you know in the case in my house right

01:21:03.920 there's usually a lazy susan on the tables no i thought it was i thought it was pretty funny though

01:21:11.840 it was a good time i'm glad yeah yeah it was pizza cheese people yeah people do that all the time it's

01:21:18.720 true um and i think that it does something with the reaction time with how the so the psilocybin will

01:21:25.120 work slower when you take it um with with some type of milk product like that has anything that has

01:21:32.400 lactose in it so like some people will take their what they call their microdose with their smoothie

01:21:37.600 in the morning and so i'm fairly certain if i remember correctly that that's what happens is

01:21:42.720 that it allows it it doesn't react quite as quickly because there's something that has to

01:21:47.280 do with the absorption of the psilocybin yeah yeah with the uh whatchamacallit

01:21:55.120 what's called mushrooms lactose like lactobus or whatever the you know

01:22:02.960 um oh yeah there is bowling this weekend it's gonna be so fun it is 10 pin right oh my god yes

01:22:11.600 saxon right it is i don't know there's a whole bunch of lanes there's all kinds of lights and

01:22:17.120 things there's like a restaurant there's all kinds of video games in the arcade and then there's the

01:22:21.280 mosque right gotta be 10 pin though because if it's five pin that's terrible i think there's both i'm

01:22:26.160 pretty sure whoever created five pin is lazy clearly because it's just a terrible way more

01:22:32.800 fun because you get to use the balls like in the the dude and that's more fun yeah but also

01:22:38.720 the fact oh my god i'm dressing up as walter so jack oh jesus oh my god oh my god oh my god

01:22:47.920 you're out of your element donnie please somebody dress up as donnie so i can just

01:22:50.960 say shut the fuck up donnie all night somebody dress do you dress up as donnie so i can say shut

01:22:54.720 the fuck up donnie all night oh my god just say it anyway i guess oh this just made my day

01:23:01.280 that well there you go lisa she will okay perfect but i don't want to say shut the

01:23:06.480 fuck up donnie do you all nightly whatever i'm gonna tell you to shut up anyway all night but that

01:23:11.760 is probably that's why i said that's why i said whatever yes oh this is gonna be so good

01:23:18.000 i'm excited i'll get it done now i gotta go to gt and get a new uh

01:23:23.680 new plaid shirt i'm just pumped because i have my own shoes so i don't have to rent shoes excuse me

01:23:29.120 yeah i like that i'm sorry you i'm sorry for everyone in the back you have your own bowling shoes

01:23:36.400 fuck yeah i do i used to bowl

01:23:42.960 it's a good time i really hope that someone's gonna videotape this tomorrow night yeah maybe

01:23:49.440 oh i'm gonna suck though because i haven't i haven't fucking bowled and are you gonna wear

01:23:53.200 like a bowling shirt i could like that says i'm an asshole or whatever your team name is on the back

01:23:58.720 i should no we never had shirts we didn't have fucking shirts we just bowled

01:24:04.800 okay it was actually decent though because if you're decent you made money so it was cool well

01:24:13.120 you made money at bowling yeah oh my god like like in kingpin no it's like uh like if you if you

01:24:20.240 actually get into like a sanctioned league then yeah at the end of the year you get money back and

01:24:24.880 depending on you know depending on how good you are you get more money back

01:24:29.760 yeah and it's fucking handy okay handy even oh my god you like walked right into that one yeah

01:24:41.600 it is it's fucking wicked sometimes it's so easy with you i can't well of course

01:24:50.080 i can't oh my god

01:24:51.440 see it's it honestly this is why i wish i was a ball too you know

01:25:03.840 how how many pounds is your ball 14 i think 14 pounds all right

01:25:09.840 what color is your ball it's uh i got i got red should have should have went with blue

01:25:19.920 but do you have your bag your ball in the bag yeah i do

01:25:25.040 it's uh it could carry two balls but i i only have one ball

01:25:30.960 i just got the one ball right now

01:25:32.320 okay yeah well i don't want to use a house ball everybody plays with those balls oh jesus all

01:25:41.840 right that's my ball i get to play i have your own balls yeah right you gotta play with your own ball

01:25:48.000 oh jesus you don't want to you don't want to play with a ball that's been played with

01:25:51.680 over and over by other people amen right you don't want used balls right oh no

01:25:58.160 right no i don't want anybody else touching my balls you would like a ball that is contoured to

01:26:03.600 your hand you know and it's just your ball you know where that ball's been this is not like hockey

01:26:11.600 skates i feel like this is a different conversation i feel like you gotta have a good ball it's gotta be

01:26:19.600 your ball you can't be using somebody else's ball i feel like i'm comfortable with you

01:26:25.200 i feel like i'm comfortable playing with somebody else's balls tomorrow

01:26:35.840 well i mean if i'm gonna bowl i guess i'm gonna have to use the community balls yeah right

01:26:41.920 you can play with my ball tomorrow is gonna get out of hand i feel like it is gonna get out of hand

01:26:49.120 god somebody likely i mean whiskey can you please make sure that i am wearing a helmet and i have

01:26:54.880 parental supervision at all times because i feel like i may definitely i am remaining unsupervised

01:27:01.680 if i am going to be walter soul check tomorrow night somebody is going to have to supervise me

01:27:05.520 because it is good i'm going to remain unsupervised that's going to be like one of those brick

01:27:10.560 killed a guy he has a trident i'm not bringing a trident i don't have it i don't i don't think i have

01:27:18.160 a trident i wish i did is the trident's gotta be is it illegal to have a trident that's a good

01:27:27.120 question i feel like if you say you're calistani i feel like you can have a trident well like i'm

01:27:34.240 i'm very interested they show up with swords yeah and that they're they're like but i'll allow it

01:27:40.960 i'm curious about the weapons that are not illegal right like because i can i can go get a bow

01:27:47.440 right like i can get a bow i don't need a license for that whole new game you don't need a license for

01:27:51.840 a boat no but you can't just go about hunting probably not but i can have a bow okay right

01:28:00.320 besides anything i'd hunt with it is illegal anyway but besides the point um

01:28:11.120 yeah yeah exactly zoo makes a pretty good point yeah well i mean that's the thing so that's why

01:28:15.760 we have to do it wearing like hawaiian shirts and stuff so that

01:28:21.520 because then it's like you know we're just white people doing what white people do all right although

01:28:27.280 it is cool we got a we have an archery school that's here and they have a thing where you can

01:28:32.160 actually it's like uh it's like a team death match with bow and arrow you know that just gave me a

01:28:40.480 really good idea i feel like we should have some uh like tommy bahama shirts in the grift shop with

01:28:44.800 some like dagwon uh um logos on them you know it would be cool actually instead of like all the black

01:28:51.520 and white stuff we should put some like tommy bahama stuff in there so we can blend in with the boomers

01:28:56.240 more boomer camouflage right yeah and archery tag rocks liquid like what they do is they

01:29:06.800 fucking they they have these like big fucking padded ends on the fucking arrow arrows and yeah

01:29:13.920 you just shoot each other with them it's fucking me me and uh when my kid was playing hockey as team

01:29:20.160 we did it as like a team building exercise and it was the greatest thing ever because we did parents

01:29:25.200 versus the kids yeah and my god that was fun shooting kids with arrows yep especially zeroing mine out

01:29:35.760 and fucking just constantly you know what i was just thinking too would be really good is um paintball we

01:29:43.760 should do a big huge uh like a dang paintball thing this summer there's a huge paintball place on highway six

01:29:50.240 outside of hammer that would be a great spot for everybody to go paintball's wagon paintball yeah oh

01:29:58.080 my god so much fun it's a huge outdoor like they have a huge outdoor paintball area yeah that would

01:30:07.120 be fucking killer and they have go-karts but okay koala mama here here's the deal you don't need

01:30:12.720 you do not need a kitty trank gun for bedtime i'll tell you what you need okay you can tell

01:30:19.600 you've never watched the rasslin before okay sleeper hold okay does that actually work sleeper

01:30:26.240 hold works every single fucking time i've never tried the sleeper hold i'm just more of a right

01:30:31.440 hook not for children clearly i would make that clear disclaimer not for children however for

01:30:37.280 somebody i wanted to go to sleep you lock in a good sleeper hold they're out you know just don't

01:30:43.680 tell anybody you do it but they're out is that the one where you come up behind them and you

01:30:49.680 yeah yeah you get right under the right under there and just flow there to the brain and you shut her

01:30:55.200 down you just give her a little little tug tug there and rolled and night night night you know see

01:31:02.080 that's what i have to learn i gotta go i have to learn that hand-to-hand combat more because i'm more of like a

01:31:07.360 i'll run and then i'm gonna sit down and align my scope but otherwise i feel like it's more of

01:31:16.560 i should learn some hand-to-hand combat too because i'm pretty good with like you know the right hooks

01:31:21.920 and things like that from the bartending years you learn how to someone up real fast

01:31:26.880 but hand-to-hand combat i feel like i need to learn more i just can't wait for somebody to try

01:31:32.080 and swing on me and then i can duck down and hit them with that rock bottom

01:31:38.160 is that the one where you go up like that no that's an uppercut but rock bottom oh no not

01:31:43.440 that i know what an uppercut is finish him i played mortal combat i mean come on i just know if they

01:31:49.760 swing i can like kind of duck out of it come in pick them up and slam them down oh yeah

01:31:56.960 yeah it's a good time the good one for drunk people is just taking them out of the feet

01:32:00.800 well i mean the rock bottom is sort of doing that because you got to sweep the leg in order to make

01:32:06.480 that really happen yeah leg sweep it's a good time yeah yeah just kind of get under them pick

01:32:13.680 them up kick the legs out and bring them down on the back yeah yep yeah i'm usually not big enough to

01:32:20.400 do that generally but yeah the palm of my hand is always a good one yep yeah those are the things

01:32:28.560 yeah i prefer the folding chair anyway yeah i mean if there's something around like a nine iron or

01:32:33.600 something i'm definitely gonna go with that first it's something i have always wanted to be able to

01:32:37.840 do though i've yet to be able to pull it off but yeah it's like be in a situation just be in a

01:32:44.800 situation where there is a folding chair readily available and somebody who needs to be fucking

01:32:50.000 smacked with it and that would be great well if you're going to hang out at bingo halls i mean

01:32:55.200 i think you'll be good for a folding chair otherwise whiskey girls out hopes to see us tomorrow

01:33:03.040 we'll see you tomorrow what you wish for excuse me yeah really i guess that's all i've got to say

01:33:10.240 is careful what you wish for i hope you get a haircut before tomorrow i'm gonna fire up the oven so hold

01:33:15.120 on a sec okay i'm here oh i feel like there's gonna be a lot of people here tomorrow it's gonna be fun

01:33:24.240 i didn't realize how many people were going in now i'm realizing there's more people it's gonna be

01:33:29.600 fucking dope there we go there i'll just preheat oh my god okay i can't fucking smoke

01:33:46.640 it's gonna kill me i swear to god that thing is gonna fucking kill me

01:33:50.400 i want cigarettes come here come here child get over here no he says get over get over here

01:34:04.160 he's adorable there man geez holy get over here tell him about tell him about give him an earbud

01:34:12.160 at the grocery store it's gonna be a good time right tell him to stop being mean to you

01:34:20.960 get that in yeah hi hunter how you doing about how we're gonna we're gonna teach you how to take

01:34:26.560 sweet chin music and then i'll hit you with switching music at the grocery store

01:34:31.600 tell me i have to buy you some ice cream or something just for being mean also hey is there

01:34:36.160 like a bunch of snow so you can make snow fort snow out there almost yeah did you make snowballs too

01:34:43.280 yeah did you guys have a snowball fight

01:34:45.040 did you play with your own something else oh my lord yeah see he is weird he is a giant weirdo

01:34:55.040 i'm super glad that you had fun in the snow what'd you do that for

01:35:02.720 oh lord

01:35:05.440 that's cool did you guys have teams

01:35:06.720 for the snowball fight i mean or did you just did you just like each other up and just

01:35:13.440 just just everybody for themselves well that's the best way to do it right there as royal rumble

01:35:21.920 you know what we have to get you one of those little snowball maker things

01:35:26.560 we've got a couple days of he is a snowball maker though yeah no they have those little things

01:35:31.200 that make the snowballs then he can launch them with a dog thrower but uh yeah actually that would

01:35:37.280 be cool we could wait and see if there's somebody out on their balcony and yeah and launch them one

01:35:43.840 up there oh my god you guys should do that makes a bunch of snowballs on the balcony and throw them

01:35:49.280 at people walking by do that yeah no well okay maybe people walking by yeah connor do that yeah yeah

01:35:55.040 okay maybe the people walking by that's different yeah yeah connor you should definitely do that i think

01:36:00.880 you should make give them a fucking earbud i'm working on it his ears are too small it's because

01:36:05.920 you gave him the wrong side dumb dumb well there's that too probably you're retarded well maybe a

01:36:12.160 little you should mostly listen to half of the things that he says and then the rest of them

01:36:16.080 ask for confirmation from an adult you gotta listen to all of it all of it

01:36:22.480 amazing right all of it tell them what chickpeas are for girls yeah

01:36:31.440 and black beans and black peas black people there you go what about white ones

01:36:38.240 white people there you go there you go see see he knows he knows his beans there you go education at

01:36:44.320 its finest all right yeah what about brown ones

01:36:47.200 well definitely brown people yeah those are for brown people mexicans yeah mexicans and such yeah

01:36:54.560 yeah especially the jeets because uh beans beans magical fruit more you more you do

01:37:00.320 yeah it's true though full of fiber beans are good for you

01:37:04.960 yeah it's true i do i make fart you know big story yeah you eat the big beans you'll be farting

01:37:12.960 good source of protein bud bird boy oh you're fart boy he's a fart boy i only like beans with chili

01:37:21.200 chili chili chili are good what about beans with tacos no no okay no beans and tacos all right what

01:37:33.760 about what about the baked beans like the maple syrup beans do you like those ones oh yeah yeah

01:37:40.240 see those are the magical fruit right there oh yeah see the beans with the eggs and the sausages those

01:37:45.600 ones yeah those are the breakfast beans those are the best damn beans oh all right there you go

01:37:51.920 that's it that's it say hello to uncle kenny he's your other uncle

01:37:56.720 no he's uncle kenny he's everybody's uncle you can say hi uncle kenny he's not the worst

01:38:08.480 there are worse there you go you're a weirdo all right go on to make you dinner go on now get go do

01:38:15.360 something dinner started it's it's like you're weird yes yeah you are this is we'll grab some chips

01:38:25.120 have a bag of chips and that should tide you over until that's done

01:38:31.920 until the time until the time yes all right finger go go another like 20 minutes or so and then that

01:38:38.640 should be done roger dodger yeah that would take us to about two hours that works yeah yeah that sounds

01:38:44.160 about good yeah yeah he can sustain himself for a little bit for the moment perfect i got a thing i got

01:38:51.760 to do and i'm gonna choke slam him oh well also just not the nicest thing yeah well it's fun right

01:39:01.440 like i'm not gonna choke slam him on the floor like come on now i'm not a monster well i mean

01:39:09.120 monster i gotta take advantage of it now because eventually he's gonna be too heavy to be like

01:39:16.880 thrown around like that so and then he's gonna toss you the fuck around that's what's gonna happen no i

01:39:22.720 learned my lesson with my kid right because i put that kid in hockey and there it was about when he

01:39:27.680 started to be about 16 is when i started to realize you know what there's a good chance he might actually

01:39:32.960 be able to beat me up he might fuck you up yeah i laughed because the one day i told him i was like

01:39:38.400 i'm gonna beat you up he's like no i think i can take you i was like well i will i'll give you this i

01:39:43.840 was like if you can last outside of two minutes uh you're gonna win because i that's about all i got

01:39:50.720 right now if i don't take you down in the first two minutes i'm gonna be gassed oh yeah and i've i've

01:39:57.280 seen him how long that kid can stay on the ice for so i'm i'm very much aware that his stamina bar

01:40:03.840 is pretty goddamn full well yeah it's you know nice to be a teenager yeah well he was also smart

01:40:13.120 stamina i did when i was a teenager yeah well he was smart too and went to the gym that was the other

01:40:18.240 thing yeah well that's again that's where i'm going right now however it's a lot different from

01:40:24.400 30 years ago i'm not a teenager anymore no no not at all that's for sure it's actually funny

01:40:34.160 well it's funny too because like there's still a bunch of things i still try to do like like

01:40:37.840 staying up all night there's like there's been a few times i've pulled like just a straight all

01:40:42.080 nighter i'm like yeah i got this i got this and then it's like five in the morning i'm like oh god

01:40:48.880 damn it i shouldn't have done this like a combined eight hours in the last five days so i don't yeah

01:40:56.000 i i normally get at least four hours or so a night i usually get about four or five hours a night but

01:41:04.960 lately i'm not i'm not sleeping like even remotely so i'm i'm running on legitimately about an hour

01:41:13.040 a day right now yeah that's why i wish i had a dog these cats they don't understand uh like it's

01:41:22.160 a true struggle snuggle with them oh yeah well because i like to try and cuddle the kitties to

01:41:28.080 go to bed but that didn't work out so well they don't like it oh yeah see i just have a body pillow

01:41:34.000 and taz sent me those links for the weighted blanket so i'm legitimately going to order one of

01:41:38.560 those weighted blankets they're dope they look everybody seems to think they're the coolest

01:41:43.840 things and it makes everybody help it helps everybody sleep apparently so i'm gonna try it

01:41:49.520 right and i do notice like when i have both cats laying on me i especially cooter because she's fat

01:41:54.880 there is that fat little yeah see yeah she's she's a fatty so like when she lays on you you know

01:42:01.600 she's she's one of them chonky kitties she's the only one that eats the treats zena watches the

01:42:06.560 girlish figure yeah yeah she's a dainty little skinny thing and then you got fat ass cooter that

01:42:13.520 thinks she's the princess around here yeah you know maybe one day i'll get my snuggle human back but

01:42:23.520 for the meantime i'll use my my body pillow and

01:42:26.640 i just i just grab all over the kitty yeah well try to hold on for as long as possible

01:42:35.680 that should be your euphemism for life no it is really um and and you know what it's funny too

01:42:41.360 because i figured out the uh the hack to being grab her by the pussy all right i figured out the

01:42:45.760 hack to being single if you're male oh yeah well i'm not male but let's hear it it's real simple

01:42:51.600 dude and single and feeling lonely and wishing you were in a relationship just sleep on the couch

01:42:56.640 and then it just reminds you of you feel less lonely you know being in a relationship yeah right

01:43:06.000 really listen jerky lardy that's what i do i just you know i fall asleep in my in my chair and

01:43:14.640 it just reminds me of days long ago i feel like we were supposed to end this stream in 20 minutes

01:43:23.760 now talk about your past traumas again but if we're going to well i don't know that they were mine uh

01:43:29.920 other people's yes well if you're other people were more traumatized than i was

01:43:34.960 that's very likely what is this cats are they're my cats are fucking idiots at night

01:43:44.240 oh yeah cats are like you're sleeping all right

01:43:47.520 fuck you we're going to a rape cat rape yeah let me let me find the noisiest

01:43:53.040 fucking thing that i can fling around the house and chase

01:43:56.000 yeah my cat used to toss stuff up into the ceiling fan

01:44:02.000 like big giant toys my cat used to play with the small dog toys

01:44:07.280 because if i brought my cat cat toys he just destroyed them

01:44:10.800 i had like the rottweiler of cats yeah my cats they just like to put lego they really like lego

01:44:16.960 like the any anything that they can just fling basically if they if it's there and they can fling

01:44:24.000 it they're like i like that and they just fling it and chase it around and they're they're idiots they

01:44:30.640 really are yeah um because apparently i snore it's awesome i snore and i drool so i don't believe that i

01:44:41.280 snore anyway i don't drool unless i'm like sleeping sleeping and that doesn't happen very often so

01:44:48.720 yeah i know oh i've definitely woken up all drooly like yeah i've done that

01:44:55.120 that's happened often um i don't believe that i snore though i've been told once in a while i might

01:45:01.360 talk in my sleep though i might have little conversations here and there

01:45:05.760 i used to ask people if they had air miles in my sleep nice

01:45:13.920 all right it's a weird thing to want to know

01:45:18.000 wow yeah i worked a lot so yeah i don't even know i wouldn't know if i talked to my sleep now

01:45:26.240 obviously because i'm sleeping but i don't snore right i don't think everyone's told me i snore but

01:45:33.120 it i definitely know that i will drool if i am in a good sleep oh yeah drooling droolings are for

01:45:38.800 sure i'm a drooly guy i feel like that's just like a given if you're having a good snoozer that yeah

01:45:45.760 i figure i was probably see i don't i don't ever remember my dreams but i'm sure that i probably have

01:45:52.960 some but i never remember them oh i always i remember i wake up and remember them i haven't

01:46:01.120 remembered a dream in years oh like years it's it's been a long time since i've

01:46:08.880 you know oh yeah no yeah i know why i don't sleep so

01:46:15.760 it's definitely because i dream yeah totally yeah i hate falling asleep because i wake up and i am not

01:46:23.200 happy so that's why i don't sleep all right it's one of those things like some people have like

01:46:31.360 there's different levels of sleep right so some people can easily fall asleep other people

01:46:37.360 not so much yeah it does interfere with sleep and dream recall yeah i think that's the end to sleep

01:46:44.560 yeah because that's why i do i definitely smoke a bunch of weed like yeah if you stop smoking weed

01:46:50.640 you'll remember your dreams but i still smoke weed and i remember my dreams but i also

01:46:56.480 i'd rather not remember my fucking dreams and stop smoking weed yeah and i just definitely don't sleep

01:47:02.400 enough to be able to say it's a terror that is a terrible suggestion like

01:47:06.480 terrible terrible suggestion or you could microdose before you went to sleep i expect better from you

01:47:16.000 lee imagine the dreams that you would wake up with you microdose before you went to sleep

01:47:22.240 i would i would rather get stoned than remember my dreams let's let's just get that out of the way

01:47:27.520 wow yeah that's for sure what are you what is that noise you are making

01:47:38.560 oh he's he's like doing some weird like beat box like humming he does that he does this like he just

01:47:46.080 sings yeah randomly yeah at times that's good um no it's not good oh it's definitely not good because

01:47:54.640 i mean a he's not good and b usually it is only like four lines of a song that just end up he sings

01:48:02.800 on repeat yeah but maybe he'll get better if he's if he's singing he might actually get better at

01:48:07.920 pitch and tone maybe but i can only allow it to go on for so long before i'm like all right you need

01:48:12.960 to stop or be supportive and not be a dick okay it drives me insane i am being i am being supportive

01:48:21.520 by allowing it i'm just being a fucking asshole i live alone i have no crotch goblins here so

01:48:27.040 i can just be an asshole because i don't have someone annoying me yeah i know he's definitely

01:48:31.040 like there are times where it's like i'll have to tell him i'm like all right okay that's enough i'm

01:48:36.960 like i i can't deal with the same sound over and over and over and over i was like you gotta like

01:48:42.560 fucking switch it up or do something but but i let it go for a little bit right i'll let it go for

01:48:51.600 a little bit and then oh i mean especially when they're like no he's hilarious i'll give him that

01:48:58.640 but it's just when it's the same sounds like on repeat for like 20 minutes it's like i just

01:49:07.200 start getting him some books to read before he goes to bed you should have him read for like a half an

01:49:10.960 hour before he goes yeah he does okay he's got some books here that he reads i have some books

01:49:16.160 that i should give you for him to read too yeah and then you can pass them along back to me and then

01:49:20.960 he like reads everything especially for his age it's funny like if we're like walking somewhere he'll

01:49:25.920 like read signs he'll just read whatever he doesn't care what it is he's always reading yeah

01:49:32.960 what do we got we got like 10 minutes left all right

01:49:40.160 why not this week is already over score bottle works good for kids yeah see

01:49:47.920 that's the other thing too i might be able to actually i guess i would have to teach myself how

01:49:53.440 to cook first really but i mean certain things i can teach him because he always stands there and

01:49:58.320 watches me so it's like all right maybe i'll start making him cook dinner what yeah teach him to

01:50:07.760 cook you believe this bullshit you believe this bullshit listen teach him to listen to the no listen

01:50:13.680 to this bullshit okay this kid doesn't fucking ever listen but his ass is in the fucking bathroom

01:50:19.280 way at the back of the apartment he hears me say that he can cook dinner and he gives it a no but any

01:50:25.600 other time he didn't hear nothing well but he heard that

01:50:35.040 yeah what are you cooking see

01:50:39.440 yeah you'll have to wait until i teach you how to cook something but

01:50:42.560 eventually eventually well you gotta get a little taller i think that's the problem

01:50:47.040 you're like a midget still

01:50:50.320 get him a stool like i can put you in midget wrestling they wouldn't even know

01:50:55.120 go and get him a step stool all right what do you mean what's that it's midget wrestling it's

01:51:00.800 midgets that wrestle it's exactly what it sounds like yeah it's exactly what it says

01:51:04.560 it's in the name man it's little midgets wrestling because it's midgets that wrestle

01:51:09.760 what do you mean what are midgets they don't teach you what midgets oh they probably don't

01:51:15.360 either oh midgets little people right that's what we we call them midgets but apparently it's

01:51:23.280 it's offensive now to call them midgets you have to call them little people but they're still

01:51:28.240 midgets to me hobbitses yeah call them hobbits that's even better i like that that's a good

01:51:34.400 compromise did you know it's technically legal to uh have a midget tossing competition in ontario

01:51:43.440 what do you mean there's actually a law against that yeah people have done that enough that they

01:51:47.200 made a law because it used to be a thing um where you would go to the bar and they would have

01:51:52.640 midget tossing competitions to the bar you're definitely going to a bar because you're going

01:51:56.400 to do that out in the east coast day going to a bar and then tossing some midgets i don't

01:51:59.840 or or maybe up somewhere where you're going to get some same camp oh my god you're gonna go up

01:52:06.080 there in northern ontario there and get some uh same camp can't even with you and touch the little

01:52:09.760 guy there eh can't even with you well am i wrong though but anyway legitimately they have

01:52:18.160 yeah no i think it was like 2003 maybe they outlawed midget tossing

01:52:22.240 stop seriously what do you mean what is midget tossing it is exactly what it sounds like you

01:52:32.000 toss a midget you see how far you can throw them

01:52:38.160 because whoever throws them the furthest wins that's why it's a competition man

01:52:45.200 what because they're midgets they're small that's why you can right be like throwing

01:52:52.160 kids

01:52:56.800 what yeah kind of like a football kind of like a football you just see how far you can throw

01:53:02.240 it that's all like a big old potato sack or something you know but uh but you're not allowed

01:53:08.320 to do it anymore no because it probably hurt their feelings and they're tiny illegal now

01:53:15.120 so what are you gonna do right seriously i can't believe that's the law against that yeah

01:53:24.720 and you're like the fact that they actually have to put up a sign that indicates that you can't do

01:53:29.760 that is like how many people did that that you have to put up a sign like please don't give

01:53:34.080 math to the crocodiles how many times did people give math to the crocodiles before you actually

01:53:40.240 have to put up a massive sign that says that's not a good idea well you're gonna get a 500 fine

01:53:46.720 if you give math to the crocodiles but i feel like the people giving math to the crocodiles

01:53:50.560 a you're not reading the sign and b probably don't have 500 to pay that fine and they're probably

01:53:56.480 well yeah that's for sure um but i also just i don't understand why that would have ever happened

01:54:03.760 in the first place and it's also like uh i had a i had a stroller and i for one though just for the

01:54:10.560 record i would pay to see crocodiles on math so would i absolutely i feel like we should go to even a

01:54:15.840 cocaine bear okay let's do a good trip to florida because we can definitely see crocodiles on math

01:54:20.400 in florida for sure yeah well we'll have to get the math when we're in florida i don't want to cross

01:54:25.680 the border with it oh i don't want to take my own math i feel like there's going to be crocodiles

01:54:29.600 there on math that we can already see i'm not going to have math but the crocodiles will oh i just

01:54:34.960 i would like to witness the math crocodile i just figured we'd get some when we get there and we just

01:54:39.280 throw it to them and then see oh no i feel like because there's a sign there's other people already

01:54:44.160 doing it so that's one of those things where i'm going to let someone else do that and witness it

01:54:48.640 instead kind of makes me wonder too because i had a i had a stroller once there and one of the warnings

01:54:54.960 in it was to take your child out of the stroller before folding it and it's like i'm i'm very curious

01:55:01.520 how often that happened that they needed to actually put that warning on the stroller

01:55:07.280 you know like even as a new father right i feel and and as an admitted retard okay

01:55:21.840 i never would have thought that i could fold the stroller with my kid in it and be like i feel like

01:55:27.840 i should leave that thing in there while i put it all back together we'll just leave that in there and

01:55:33.120 see what happens it's like folding up the couch bed with the people still in it bloop night night

01:55:39.680 be stupid we are done this you now into the couch you go night night it's unbelievable amazing

01:55:49.360 it's like closing the door in auschwitz wood hinge wood and all

01:55:53.520 all right all right well i mean history will show basically same same i mean it doesn't make any

01:56:06.880 sense no nothing ever does really not in the land of make-believe something like that what are you doing

01:56:15.520 back there what are you doing oh my being oh my this child i tell you

01:56:23.040 he's adorable what do you mean why don't don't accept children from the government

01:56:28.320 adorable

01:56:31.760 you stop it oh my goodness homestead travois is getting some tonight she got croissants the foreplay

01:56:38.960 i am whoa what there's a whole lot happening in the chat i missed midget racing yeah midget racing

01:56:47.360 is fun i can't believe that there's midget racing uh all the girls were there i want to

01:56:54.080 know what midget racing is though what is midget like them running yeah i would think so that's funny

01:57:00.480 enough really so if you've ever watched midget run it is pretty funny

01:57:04.880 i feel like i would pay to watch that well you're not as funny as watching an actual

01:57:11.520 midget run but you do kind of run funny yeah totally but no let's find a place where we can

01:57:16.960 find midget racing i mean that sounds fun entertaining want to find a place where we

01:57:20.960 can find midgets well i mean i do like watching midget wrestling it is but we have to make them do

01:57:26.960 things though so if it's like midgets racing then i would go to do that anybody know where to rent

01:57:31.520 some midgets no we don't want to rent the midgets i want to go there has to be a place where there's

01:57:36.000 midget racing if they have to have laws surrounding things with midgets there has to be a place that

01:57:41.040 has midget racing you know maybe but i'm just wondering if there's a place where we could rent

01:57:45.440 some midgets i feel like you can go to vegas or maybe and get some midgets but i don't want to be

01:57:51.920 in on whatever that is rent some midgets dress them up like fucking garden gnomes and just place

01:57:56.640 them on people's lawns oh lord no they're not no and then what yell pokeroo and then run away maybe

01:58:10.960 we could try that or

01:58:15.360 i don't know maybe i don't know oh i'll akbar and then run i don't know something like that okay

01:58:22.400 anyway uh just before we go though i want to remind everybody the uh the new upcoming season

01:58:28.320 once again kitchen nightmares going to haiti so i'm told that everything's homemade it's partially

01:58:35.600 homemade partially i mix it with cheese whiz are you joking with me right now

01:58:41.920 it's a very modern updated barbecue yes it's more like a torture rack for food a torture rack for food

01:58:47.600 he's not joking now in my book i think that's well done now that is the most disgusting way i've

01:58:54.480 ever seen fucking good ingredients bastardized he might as well open a fucking greasy spoon

01:58:59.120 and serve egg and chips because that's fucking disgusting how can you serve that

01:59:06.560 it's like it's been left of days and it's been attacked by cats

01:59:09.760 kitchen nightmares returns monday september 25th on fox

01:59:25.680 lord have mercy that's a man don't don't miss it this september kitchen nightmares in haiti

01:59:32.960 it's gonna be banging

01:59:33.920 it's gonna be spicy i can't help it they leave me unsupervised and i have programs and stuff

01:59:44.960 it's what happens yeah i yeah it's it's what happens so anyway well it was nice to see everybody

01:59:51.440 absolutely absolutely uh so we'll uh we'll end this and i guess i gotta yeah fulfill my legal obligations

01:59:58.640 and feed the feed the child feed the crotch goblin over here and there you go you're a thing you're a

02:00:06.400 thing now tell him he's a nice boy be nice sarah's saying some terrible things about you

02:00:16.560 i don't know you stop that and that she thinks she could take you

02:00:22.560 all right that she would hook you up with some sweet chin music

02:00:25.280 you don't believe me see oh my this perfect perfect all right you're a good boy

02:00:36.720 well we'll see you randomly when we do another yeah fuck around and find out yeah one day we might

02:00:43.680 actually nail down an actual time until then we're gonna just chris freestone our way through this so

02:00:48.560 and we always seem to fuck around and we find out there it is

02:00:55.280 it was

02:01:02.160 you

02:01:02.720 you

02:01:02.840 is

02:01:04.400 you

jonnyrawton - March 22, 2024

FAFO w⧸Jonny and Sarah - v4iay8x

Episode Stats

Length

Words per Minute

Word Count

Sentence Count

Misogynist Sentences

Hate Speech Sentences

Summary

Transcript