Do Messages Count as Cheating
Episode Stats
Words per Minute
197.75937
Summary
In this episode, we discuss how social media has caused arguments in our relationships, and the impact it has had on our dating life. We discuss the benefits and negatives of social media and how it can have a negative impact on our relationships.
Transcript
00:00:00.000
has social media ever caused an argument in a relationship yeah oh my god yeah what have women
00:00:08.800
argued with you or men about uh the liking game back when that was a feature when i used to get
00:00:15.520
me in heat discussions all the time but i would i was like i would do it for like algorithm things
00:00:21.600
so if i know i'm about to post i'll just like anything on my timeline because i know they're
00:00:25.280
gonna look and they're gonna go and like my thing back yeah that was that that was the vibe i would
00:00:29.760
like picture of your grand your ankle whatever dogs anything on that timeline at that time i'll
00:00:35.280
just i'll just think and they'll be next to me when i do it it's not like i have to do it in secret
00:00:39.360
but i understand it looks crazy yeah it looks crazy anything you pop because as well it puts
00:00:44.080
it onto their newsfeed as well when you remember when you can see what other people that's what i'm
00:00:47.120
talking about that's when it was the issue yeah so i used to get into into situations about that but
00:00:53.280
i think on the flip side if your girl only follows 90 people let's say for instance and then and i
00:00:58.400
you know what i mean and then she follows that one guy you could be you might you see 91
00:01:07.760
so i think it works both ways though my situation was different where um a girl slid into my dms on
00:01:15.280
facebook i like went the extra mile on facebook to find out that she went college with my girl
00:01:21.520
and then how that went was facebook you know like when your relationship it says your relationship with
00:01:26.160
this person i wasn't that smart when i was below 25 like i said um so what happened was um she was
00:01:34.800
like oh when we started having a conversation she was like oh but you're in a relationship with this
00:01:39.040
person hold on a minute i think i went to the same college oh i did go to the same college see
00:01:44.000
screenshotted my whole conversation with the girl and send it to my um my then girlfriend man and that
00:01:50.080
obviously caused oh that argument is because you were cheating yeah
00:01:59.920
but i was 25 it wasn't take seriously that's a fair enough argument
00:02:05.120
what what did you get in an argument about um it's essentially like you said it's one of those like
00:02:10.960
back when you can see who you liked and what you liked back when that was a thing is like it was you
00:02:16.640
with like back back then again we were young we were dumb we didn't know where the social media was
00:02:22.080
we grew up with social media essentially at the same time so you would see your partner liking all
00:02:27.760
these things and then that would be an argument because for those who don't know who are too young
00:02:32.560
to know instagram is to show people who you liked like like the pictures you liked on like his own
00:02:38.160
separate feed so that feed will get you yeah that feed will get you in trouble did you know that um i'm
00:02:44.560
not sure if it's the same now but before on instagram if you were following under 200 people it wouldn't
00:02:50.960
show what order you followed people in you know that so like let's say your man goes out on a night
00:02:56.480
out and he starts following someone new then you know you might click on their page and you'll be
00:03:01.600
like all right cool she was at the same party he obviously had an interaction however however if he was
00:03:06.960
following if he's following on if they're following under 200 i don't know if it's still the same feature
00:03:11.840
and i don't know updates and stuff but yeah man those kind of things get into you get into arguments
00:03:16.800
over that well wait let me ask you something right because what you just said bro i weren't cheating it
00:03:21.360
was a conversation through yeah yeah yeah like a physical situation it's not physical no i don't know
00:03:37.200
it can be emotional you can emotionally cheat all right let me ask you this let me ask you this
00:03:41.840
because i don't know i like to hear that coming from women can i ask you something devil's advocate
00:03:45.440
is it really the end of the world if he's messaging another girl thank you oh like i i agree it's not
00:03:51.200
the end of the world but it's not the start of the eyeball i just think like i just think like if we
00:03:58.800
have open social media profiles can we really like get off our high horse sometime like because i think that
00:04:04.560
attention is um to women is sexist to men do you guys agree with that yeah okay so i'm like if we
00:04:11.920
most of us have open instagrams and relationships meaning we can get attention from high status men
00:04:17.440
and that's always on the table but if he sends a message like it's the end of the world no but if
00:04:23.200
he does what he was doing she messaged me first i was just responding it's rude not to respond what kind
00:04:29.280
of message we talking about if it's like if it's like you know emojis and stuff like that then it's a
00:04:33.920
bit mad and i mean if it's general conversation then you know yeah you might be able to bus case
00:04:39.280
it's crazy i think i just look at things like differently i just no i'm with you i'm with you
00:04:44.160
isn't it you pick like battles and wars i guess yeah you gotta pick battles because if you're the type of
00:04:48.800
person to like date for like a long-term relationship or marriage right um then it's like
00:04:55.600
like in the grand scheme of things is a message gonna make or break your life exactly it's the
00:05:01.200
intention about do you know i think most of it becomes that great area of the unknown so it's
00:05:05.280
the attention behind the message all right let me ask you a question because i don't feel like you're
00:05:08.880
on my side i'm not cool you're with your girl you've been with her a little while you're on a
00:05:15.600
break yeah break you mean she's single okay okay she's single she's single okay so you might agree
00:05:22.240
with me in this yeah you've been with each other for a while now i was a situation okay you have a
00:05:27.120
girl she's not your girl but you know like you have not it sounds bad like a backup not a backup you
00:05:32.640
have people on your phone that you know like you right now i was in a situation where i was always
00:05:38.160
with someone from like 16 so when i wasn't with someone i used to just grab a girl that i knew
00:05:42.960
like me because i wanted to feel like it was a fulfill thing right so if i'm not with so if i'm
00:05:48.560
not with you and we've broken up for like a week and we have a sexual situation i didn't cheat on you
00:05:54.400
because we were on a break and you'll mind them fingers bro
00:05:57.040
what i was saying is um the moment you are on a break you've you fed her to the wolves bro you
00:06:09.840
can't and and vice versa bro you're single you're two single people it's no longer i know it may feel
00:06:15.200
like you know okay cool we were in a relationship but boy you're not under that covenant you're not
00:06:20.880
under that contract that obligation that verbal commitment anymore in it so whatever you do it
00:06:25.920
might be frowned upon it might be whatever but some people just move on quicker than others
00:06:29.280
that's all i feel like you're like 20 on my side now there we go there we go would you guys work
00:06:34.720
through a message yeah she would um i think no i think the intentions matter and i think that if
00:06:45.200
he's messaging somebody else he's already checked out and i'm i think i'm very strict when it comes to
00:06:50.080
that like i think that if you're going to be in a relationship with me i think that you have to put some
00:06:53.840
boundaries in place i think you have to be what if you're on holiday what if you're on holiday and
00:06:57.280
then you come back and you find that he he messaged another girl because you were away i'm leaving him
00:07:02.800
i'll be fuming yeah no no i'm leaving him i think i i i don't tolerate anything that because to me it
00:07:09.600
seems a bit much to break up over a message it depends what the message is though it depends what
00:07:13.440
i'm flirty then the intention's quite clear how how old are you guys again you're what i'm 29 29
00:07:21.760
how old are you two he's 22 though i'm 29 29 is the difference i'm 24. okay she has a little time
00:07:27.440
to waste yeah yeah i'm just thinking because you're you're 29 if you're in a relationship like do you
00:07:38.080
want kids yes um do you don't have any kids no so you know if you're single by 30 your chance of
00:07:43.360
having a child drops below 50 so you're actually more likely as many of you know i was just banned
00:07:49.520
on tick tock and we are demonetized on a daily basis on this platform if you want to help please
00:07:56.800
consider sending a super thanks below every donation helps and it helps make what we do possible