JustPearlyThings - June 22, 2023


Innocent Man LOSES His Child To Foster Care


Episode Stats

Length

10 minutes

Words per Minute

139.08275

Word Count

1,488

Sentence Count

182

Misogynist Sentences

2

Hate Speech Sentences

1


Summary

In this episode, I speak to a man whose son was taken into care by the local authority, who claimed that he had been abused by his own father. This is the story of what happened to his son, and how it led to him being placed in care.


Transcript

00:00:00.000 And then a few days later, like I said, on the day that the coroner made the finding, so the
00:00:09.120 the local authority applied to have him and take him into care. They had coerced him,
00:00:17.280 in my opinion, to say that he was scared of both his parents, mother and father.
00:00:23.120 Right. Now, who knows what the truth is? But obviously his best friend had been murdered by,
00:00:33.200 you know, there's all sorts of things going on there in his mind.
00:00:42.240 I have hundreds of photos. We have very happy reminiscences
00:00:48.560 of my time with him during 2019. Several witness accounts saying how happy he was in my my care.
00:01:01.200 And he was taken into care. And that's when the public law,
00:01:08.960 the public law process started.
00:01:13.200 So they took him into foster care. That's right.
00:01:16.000 So now he's not with you or your ex-wife? He's not with either of us, no.
00:01:20.720 Okay. And that was 2020? So this is the end of, yeah, the beginning of 2020, the end of 2019.
00:01:27.760 Okay. So 2019, 2020. And that was because he, he said something to them that made
00:01:38.720 them want to take him into care or? Yes, that seems to be enough. Okay.
00:01:42.640 Okay. Okay. And the, the judge who was an even more, a new judge was appointed.
00:01:49.760 Uh, judge, her honor judge Dowding. Now, it seems that she had, um,
00:01:57.440 she stated that a threshold of abuse had been crossed.
00:02:02.080 Now, I've no idea what that meant at the time. I have no idea what that means now. It seems to be
00:02:08.480 completely arbitrary. This kind of declaration made that, yeah, that threshold's been crossed.
00:02:14.480 You can take it. But in family court, you don't actually need evidence is the issue.
00:02:19.280 No evidence was presented. Um, we had a psychologist, a psychologist had been involved in a private law,
00:02:32.640 uh, proceedings. His findings were kind of rubbished, um, by most of the legal professionals
00:02:40.160 at the time. So it didn't really have much bearing on the case. However, a new psychologist was employed
00:02:48.240 to analyze all three of us, me, my ex-wife and my son. But this takes a month, you know,
00:02:55.120 that the wheels turn very slowly. So where are we up to 2020? And I'm allowed to see my son once every now
00:03:05.360 and then. But there are more and more restrictions imposed by local authorities. So, you know,
00:03:15.840 um, are you not allowed to say you love him? Right? You're not allowed to ask him where he's been.
00:03:23.360 You're not allowed to say where you've been. You're not allowed to tell him what you've been doing.
00:03:28.480 You're not allowed to touch him. You're not allowed to... Your own son.
00:03:32.320 Yes. Well, what happened? What happened? We, the start of this process was actually very happy.
00:03:38.560 I'm just, I'm so confused because it's like, okay, so you get...
00:03:46.000 They take your son into care and you're not allowed to talk to your son in care?
00:03:49.680 Is that what I'm understanding? Well, it, it, it was a, it was a process
00:03:55.920 that developed over the, the months. So I was, I was seeing him once every three or four,
00:04:03.040 three or four weeks. It was a bit like... While he's in care?
00:04:05.280 Yes. So it was a bit like a return to the... Where is he staying? With another family?
00:04:08.720 Another family in, in social rupture, yes. Okay. And what was it? A good family,
00:04:13.920 at least? Was it, you think? I've no idea. But they're, they're strangers,
00:04:18.080 essentially. Yeah, strangers. So now he's staying with strangers,
00:04:21.040 and you're not allowed to ask him how he's doing. You're not allowed, which is crazy because
00:04:26.720 like, what if it's a bad family? Well, what if? Yeah. But you don't even know because you can't,
00:04:32.080 like, you can't even ask your son how he's doing. No. And this is essentially because they accused
00:04:38.800 both of you of abuse now or the threshold? Yes. They, but like... This is where it gets smoking. To
00:04:46.320 this day, I'm not really sure. How are you not sure? There's no court documents they gave you? I can
00:04:52.320 show you a court order, and... Can I see? Yeah.
00:05:06.320 The psychologist was pretty damning of myself, and that is the... Look, this psychologist was
00:05:21.520 employed to seek the truth. I suggested it. It was my idea. Okay. It came from my legal team,
00:05:32.560 that we want another psychologist to report someone who's really going to get to the bottom of this,
00:05:37.680 once and for all. Because this is obvious. And at various times... Remember, no, no fact-finding
00:05:45.440 hearing had been attempted up to this point. And no fact-finding hearing had ever been attempted
00:05:50.560 to this day. No fact-finding hearing. Okay. Right. Okay. So there's never been a process of
00:05:57.760 witnesses and cross-examination, that sort of thing. It's never actually happened. So we've got...
00:06:06.800 So we... Sorry, I've lost my train of thought, but... Sir?
00:06:10.400 There's just... There's so many people involved in this that it's just... It's getting a bit confusing, so...
00:06:16.400 I'm sorry, yes. No, which... Which... I mean, it's... It's seven years, so it's kind of hard to condense, but...
00:06:22.400 But essentially, so your... Your legal team, his idea is the psychologist,
00:06:29.600 but the psychologist comes in and gives, like, a very biased report.
00:06:34.320 It's a hatchet job, I think, would be... A hatchet job.
00:06:37.440 Yeah. Is there any... Can I see it? How do I...
00:06:39.600 Yes. It's on here, again. Okay.
00:06:41.920 Well, I will certainly show you. Okay.
00:06:43.040 So I've had a subsequent psychologist report done on myself, which shows...
00:06:49.120 And is the psychologist employed by the government?
00:06:51.600 Yes. Okay.
00:06:52.480 So this was funded by the local authority.
00:06:55.200 Okay. But you did a private psychologist, and they... Since then, yes.
00:06:58.400 And then that was all clear.
00:06:59.760 Yeah, yeah.
00:07:00.880 But the one that came from the government basically said you were both incapable of being parents,
00:07:05.440 and that's how your son got put into care.
00:07:07.360 Yeah. But what actually happened was the psychologist took everything my ex-wife said as gospel truth.
00:07:16.480 So he didn't question any of her allegations. So it's the same old thing.
00:07:20.640 Did she file a criminal report?
00:07:23.200 No.
00:07:23.680 Okay. Because that's the biggest... That's what I've learned is you have to ask them what court they filed in,
00:07:29.280 criminal or family, because family court, it seems like everything goes, but criminal court,
00:07:35.680 like they actually need evidence.
00:07:37.200 Yeah. Well, it's... My understanding is that in a criminal court, the test is beyond reasonable doubt.
00:07:45.920 So you are found guilty of a crime if you are found... If it is beyond reasonable doubt that you
00:07:51.600 committed that crime. But in family court, the rule is balance of probabilities.
00:07:57.920 So is the man likely to be abusive? Is the woman likely to be saying the truth?
00:08:04.320 Yes. Well, it becomes incredibly subjective.
00:08:08.160 Oh, and be that subjective, and it's going to be based on your world view.
00:08:12.640 Of course.
00:08:13.040 So if you have a feminist world view, you already hate men. And a lot of people from these government
00:08:19.840 institutions have a feminist lens on the world.
00:08:23.040 Absolutely. I have met very few professionals who I wouldn't automatically
00:08:34.400 tell was a feminist. Even many of the males were clearly feminist in their outlook. The psychologist was
00:08:42.960 a male. But he towed the feminist line. And he used all the latest buzzwords. So I'm... I have narcissistic tendencies.
00:08:53.920 And you will find the word narcissism used time and again to describe men that they can't really
00:09:06.960 find anything else wrong with. Okay. Because they've got no evidence that they found...
00:09:10.800 I've done nothing wrong. They've got no... There's no instance of abuse even.
00:09:17.600 The local authority didn't even accuse me of any particular instance of abuse.
00:09:25.280 So there's no allegations made against me by the local authority themselves.
00:09:29.280 But I have some narcissistic tendencies. Right. That'll do. He can't possibly be a good father because he
00:09:38.960 cares too much about his son. You know, he sees his son as an extension of himself, which I do.
00:09:45.360 Okay. He expects a lot from his son. He's pushing. Yes, I'm pushing.
00:09:50.320 I'm strict disciplinarian. No, I'm not actually. But two of the... Two out of three is enough for that. Okay.
00:09:59.600 So once you're branded a narcissist, it's a wonderful. You can't fight back. Because whenever you say,
00:10:07.040 actually, I'm not a narcissist. Well, you would say that, wouldn't you? Because you're a narcissist.
00:10:11.200 So I'm... You know, I... When I say, well, sorry, I'm not a thug. I'm not the person you think I am.
00:10:18.400 I'm a chartered engineer. Oh, he thinks he's a genius. Right. He's got an IQ of 120. But he says he's a
00:10:26.640 genius, which requires 121. You say, well, this is ridiculous. I never claimed I was. I just...
00:10:32.480 I'm just not a thug.