She WANTS A Man She COULD CONTROL
Episode Stats
Summary
In this episode, we talk about marriage, equality, divorce and why we don't want to get married anymore. We also talk about why we are more divorced than ever before and what we should do about it.
Transcript
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but i was just curious um how you expected that to go because when girls say equal i don't know if
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they'd actually want a guy because when i hear equal it's it just sounds like girls want a guy
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that like follows what they want i feel like it works more like an equilibrium rather than
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equalness there's more of a wave kind of goes it is a wave yeah i think equality maybe is the wrong
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term to be using more of an equilibrium is right and because it goes back and forth and it's never
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a straight line to have equalness is where you will have problems to say that you're equal isn't right
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because you won't work as a relationship if you're both equal because yeah that's not a man we're
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going to get resolved equal is not the right word but yeah yeah that's what i meant i'm curious just
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show of hands and then i'll go to you i'm just curious who here would submit to their husband's
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authority i will you would okay so it wouldn't be equal then yeah but he'd be above you no yeah just
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to submit you you do need to be willing to back down and not be equal anymore
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okay so so you say you would though you would submit well i don't know it's a tricky one
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maybe not okay no i would you would okay is that what you do now in your relationship he makes all
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the decisions um no is that just gonna change when you guys get married or what
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if he's a provider yes so if he he pays all the bills you're gonna he can decide everything he's my
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boss okay uh what about you you said you would uh to some extent yeah what do you mean um i don't know
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like it feels tricky yeah i'd say to some extent well i think either way women like well anyway it's about
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me so um if i was a wife i'd i like the leadership role on his end okay you know but when it comes to
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i think equality is the wrong word but decision making i'd like to be part of it or um he respects
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me enough to be like oh babe you know and discuss about certain things but i would respect his word for
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things um but i think i think just being on a general level that we respect each other on
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certain things or most things just to keep it leveled and to make it work then it's like oh no
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i've got this power over you or it's like me arguing back you know that makes sense um but answering your
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question at the start um i like a partner in crime and a best friend i think everyone thrives um
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to get that do you think that's normal in history that men and women were best friends
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i think man was the question no the man was the head oh yeah the head of the family oh yeah why
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did when do you think that switched probably with this generation i don't know was it like the 1970s
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or something do you think that has good outcomes being best friends with your husband yes who said
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yes yeah yeah who who said yes you did you did then why are we more divorced than ever before but maybe
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that's where my point comes in of not wanting to get married so if you're really gonna want to get
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married i'm like you have to be friends with them whether you like it or not look at this is the
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right crowd to be talking this channel well she makes it you make a very good point because because
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where all of this is going is kind of what i was trying to say to articulate at the beginning which
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is that is the marriage certificate fit for purpose anymore given we've got all these dynamics going
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on in society given there's all these divergent wants and needs and people trying to wiggle out of you
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know not wanting to be submit or whatever does it actually work anymore i'm not convinced that it
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does work anymore i think the reason it works for you know for better or worse and there's arguments
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in both cases but the reason it worked before was because society and religion kept it in place
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and there were certain expectations for what you did and now those expectations aren't there so
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everyone goes and says the lines that pearl read out in the church but nobody really means it and then
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10 years later they're just like oh so bad you know and that is not a good basis for for marriage so do we
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need something else or do we i mean you know there's a personal choice here as well i haven't
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chosen to get married up to this point largely because of this stuff you know to to be honest
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um or maybe you just haven't met the right woman well that yeah i mean makes you want to get married
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no i mean look i mean i wouldn't i never rule anything out entirely but like i said i'm not i'm
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not champing at the bits oh my god i really want to get married i really want to sign up to this contract
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where i can get half of my stuff taken away on a whim i mean it's just not do you know what i mean like
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i'm happy um being in sort of long-term relationships or more casual relationship
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whatever but marriage i mean i mean would you sign a contract where you only have a 10 chance of
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getting your kids if he takes them and he can take half your stuff and the house and you'd have to move
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out would you sign it and you only get one and a half meals a day i i think if if their value was
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very high in my life then i would take that risk i'm a risk taker anyway and i feel like if i'm gonna
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get something out of that which is what i really want and which is what i've always wanted in life
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which is love and to be loved i'll take that risk because that's the purpose of life to be loved
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everybody here is searching to be loved to be wanted and to be appreciated by someone that is
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sorry but i think everybody is searching for that like everybody in the end just wants to
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be loved and find that person who accepts them for who they are but why would you need marriage for that
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yeah yeah um it's still been around well for me it's like i don't know it's like religion and
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things like that like that's something another thing is you say except for who they are but what
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if it's the guy who you are is somebody who wants to sleep around every couple of weeks you know and
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sort of have sex with the barista or the girl who's working the nightclub do you know what i mean
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because and this is a whole other area because obviously male sexuality is is you know by and large
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you know they like pearl said i think earlier you know they want to have sex with as many people as
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possible women have a slightly different sort of agenda for the most part um and then you get
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into this whole area where and i've seen other shows you know other podcasts where they talk about
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this but like um you know a guy can really truly love a woman and still go and have sex with somebody
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else and that's purely by that's purely physical yeah and it doesn't detract from his love from the
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woman but but for many women you would say well well tell me tell me about you honestly what is it
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what is your your makeup it's like well i like shagging around i mean a lot of women
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women are not going to accept that you know what i mean so but they but that's not that's not like
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that's not like by force that's just like a preference for a man there there are men who
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can actually be uh loyal like they can they can but come on it's not just it's not like something
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that's wrong with them or it's like this is who they are like if most men were in tiger woods position
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come on that's like me saying well i want a hermes back you know well she said you studied zoology
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didn't you have you got any input on this i mean do you think the males generally they look you know
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they want to get their end away or i mean men naturally in like if you look at the other primates
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that yes so we are a primate um sorry to anyone that doesn't believe in evolution but we are a
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primate and other male primates like chimpanzees will meet with several females and it's the biological
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makeup is to breed are they monogamous no and and i don't from looking back in the evolution of hominins
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which is what we are we're a hominin they weren't monogamous and it's not necessarily the way we're
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made up it's society that's done that so for you to say that someone should always be with the same
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person for the rest of them like their lives oh if that's not what they want then so be it don't
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judge someone because that's what they say but you know on the other side of it you're right you're
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again to account to what i've just said you are right because if the if the guy is also signing
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up for that marriage contract then he should also abide by that contract do you know what i mean
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but then it comes back to my question which is well is it in the guys is it in my best interest
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to sign up for it then you know i do i hear your point i really do and i do hear your point like
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why would a man want to sign up for that paper um and i i really feel like it just comes down to
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the individual and and what they believe in and i feel like yeah it is it is to do with religion
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definitely i honestly think if most men knew what they were signing i don't think most men would do
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it hmm and i think if you took religion out of it as well it's a lot of i know like a lot of muslim
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men you know doing they wouldn't get married during this documentary i just i can't even believe like
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the stories i've heard so they're crazy they're crazy like guys get screwed over especially i think
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it's worse here than the us really that's shocking it depends on the state yeah yeah but i don't i don't
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know enough about i've actually i've learned more about the laws here than the us now but as many of
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you know i was just banned on tick tock and we are demonetized on a daily basis on this platform if you
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