JustPearlyThings - March 16, 2023


She was too shocked when she heard this


Episode Stats

Length

9 minutes

Words per Minute

172.41632

Word Count

1,566

Sentence Count

1


Summary


Transcript

00:00:00.000 what I get that is the hardest thing at times like as women and I've even
00:00:06.060 struggled with this like understanding it's his plan it's not your plan and so
00:00:10.640 if he wants to do it we can do it if not you know yeah I mean like I said you
00:00:16.980 know we had two boys back-to-back and I asked my husband at the time I said do
00:00:21.300 you want to try for a girl do you want three if he had said yes we would have
00:00:25.620 you know I would have been a mom of three but he said no I just think
00:00:29.580 discounting men is is first of all this is a human being that has you know
00:00:35.220 feelings and emotions and you know I just as a mom this is a tough one for me
00:00:39.780 because I see what's out there and you know I want I want everybody to win but
00:00:45.540 you know I do feel very strongly about just completely discounting men just
00:00:50.220 because because if the tables were turned oh I said words to not say
00:00:59.980 anymore okay decided I'm just tired of these words yes it's from the show
00:01:03.420 partner mm-hmm horoscope signs looking for a connection hmm energy trauma toxic
00:01:11.700 masculinity my truth my god healing my narcissistic ex-boyfriend my abusive ex
00:01:17.220 boyfriend a grape accusation with no evidence okay I'm glad you don't don't
00:01:21.900 judge yeah but manifesting equals I do I want to work but I want to do no work
00:01:29.440 and get the outcome as a woman we know what your gender is I did too much and I
00:01:34.260 let him walk all over me equals I like cheaters and toxic men and I will choose
00:01:39.220 them and be toxic as well and not admit that I had any part to play except quote
00:01:44.160 unquote giving too much generational trauma I make the same mistakes that my
00:01:48.920 parents make and I am too dumb to learn from their mistakes and instead I will
00:01:52.440 make the same mistakes but blame it on them in my feminine energy men always
00:01:57.760 stare and approach me I will be submissive for the right man men are trash
00:02:02.340 equals I take no accountability for the negative part that I play or any women play
00:02:07.280 in our relationships he needs to make six figures equals I have no emphasis on
00:02:12.060 character I don't need a man but I want a man my ring needs to cost this much
00:02:16.980 financial abuse I became feminine I need a man to maintain me we need to five I
00:02:23.820 feel like I am traditional when I am single oh my goodness are these quotes
00:02:30.600 from your show yeah just like talking to girls okay almost all of them I
00:02:36.780 understand help me understand since we were just talking about femininity I
00:02:39.960 became feminine because you can improve mm-hmm you know I I understand where
00:02:45.660 you're coming from I may I may walk back this one okay however I find that most of
00:02:50.940 the time when women say it mmm it equals I did no real work I made no real
00:02:55.980 changes but I say I am feminine oh just like poof okay yeah I just I became
00:03:00.720 feminine and then I'll like break it down and I'll be like okay so what what did
00:03:04.320 you do to become mm-hmm or they'll say I was modern and I became traditional so
00:03:08.520 I'll say well what did you do to become those things and they'll have like just
00:03:13.860 word salad yeah no and no real answers like you know if you're gonna say I
00:03:19.080 became what you said was a real answer I worked on lowering my voice yeah I used
00:03:23.080 to do masculine manner those are real answers and that actually clarified that
00:03:29.800 actually clarified you don't have to come getting better this is better this is
00:03:34.960 no I'm getting better it's important to me but yeah I mean I know you actually
00:03:39.460 clarified a lot of things that like I honestly was so confused when I heard it
00:03:45.940 because I just heard so much like fluff and garbage and even like girls that I know
00:03:51.520 that studied femininity and would say I became feminine had no real answers yeah
00:03:59.080 and then they would say oh I became feminine but you're screaming at your
00:04:03.340 your guy Howard how did you become feminine if you're screaming at him right if
00:04:07.720 you have that response then you still have some work to do because if you ask
00:04:12.040 these same women how did you get your cosmetology license oh I had to study this
00:04:17.560 amount I had to take these many classes I had to do these many hours how did
00:04:21.340 you become a dentist how did you pick anything we can walk you through all of
00:04:26.680 the things that we do to get what we want and a goal of you know how you show up
00:04:31.480 in a relationship requires just as much work if not more and it's okay I'm
00:04:37.060 actually kind of proud to say you know I have had to do a lot of work to go from
00:04:41.800 that 50 50 mindset to being more of a support system and I haven't arrived I
00:04:47.920 still have work to do but I've gotten a lot better so mm-hmm so is there any
00:04:53.440 phrases we should add to here that you've heard oh goodness so you had the
00:04:57.520 the trauma and the energy toxic let me know in the chat guys if there's anything
00:05:02.920 we missed that we need to add do we have what manage have you heard that one no
00:05:10.780 oh but I'll add it manage it's basically describing masculine behavior like
00:05:16.780 there's something wrong with it and it's not better or worse we are different we're
00:05:21.460 equally valued but we are not equal and I think that's a beautiful thing I thought
00:05:27.820 of another uh-huh I need like I need there's some phrase that girls use when
00:05:33.760 they won't be led by a guy they're like oh well I need the right man to like I'll
00:05:37.900 be submissive for the right man I will be submissive for the right man mm-hmm
00:05:43.240 because I in a way I understand where they're coming I was gonna say yeah this
00:05:48.340 one I could unpack a little bit too but at the same time that equals I choose right
00:05:55.600 like they put the accountability on them like oh he didn't lead me when it's
00:05:59.800 like you picked him that's true we have to be responsible for our choices I think
00:06:06.540 yes I am submissive by nature if there are men around me like there's even if
00:06:14.480 you're not my man there are some ways that I do submit I don't talk over men I
00:06:19.440 don't try to compete with men I don't brag or lead with my accomplishments
00:06:29.280 because those things are very masculine traits now if you ask me I'm going to
00:06:35.220 respond you ask me a direct question I'll give you a direct answer but there are
00:06:39.420 ways that I submit to my man that I don't to other men but that's the only
00:06:45.780 thing that I wanted to to clarify on that but if you're a submissive person then
00:06:50.040 if you're a submissive woman then you're just a submissive woman you know I think
00:06:53.700 about my mom you know even her son my brother if he said mom no we're gonna get
00:06:59.760 you this you know the doctor said you need to do this so you need to do that
00:07:02.640 that's her son she says okay Phil and so like I see that so it's just
00:07:07.620 realizing like this is a man who loves you and and you know is looking out for you so
00:07:12.480 yeah I don't know I'll be submissive for that right yeah I think you should be
00:07:18.660 submissive in relationship to your man but I think almost you know I just
00:07:27.060 believe in respecting it so what phrases to add to our vocabulary mmm I trust you
00:07:32.760 mmm I support you whatever you say baby mmm thank you I have your back I'm making
00:07:39.660 blank for dinner tonight honey I believe or I think what can I do to help you how
00:07:44.940 can I help what else should we add mmm I'm proud of you do we have I believe in
00:07:52.680 you what are all the things that I say to my man I'm gonna get a little bit
00:07:57.880 vulnerable here I couldn't do this without you I need you I trust you I love you I
00:08:08.980 desire you I miss you I care about you I want you those are great thank you these
00:08:23.680 yeah so we're gonna get rid of these mm-hmm and we're gonna go to this okay what
00:08:34.000 do you think guys oh I'm so glad I'm glad it worked out this way is that a good
00:08:38.260 one oh who hurt you they want to add to this yes Lord who hasn't been hurt good
00:08:43.660 grief everybody's got a story that can make you cry that's true yeah that's true
00:08:48.520 as many of you know I was just banned on tick tock and we are demonetized on a
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