Single Mother COULD NOT Answer This Question
Episode Stats
Words per Minute
223.90987
Summary
In this episode, we talk about how women should handle their money, how to manage our money, and how to deal with a man who doesn't have it all together. We also discuss the difference between a woman who makes $50k vs $100k, and a woman that makes $55k.
Transcript
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you know what um auntie said she said that um last time she was on the show i don't know if
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you guys probably i don't know if you've seen clips with her she's like this um 50 something
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year old auntie that's just like yeah she's so funny and she said that um i i knew a couple that
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like where he worked and she worked and she would just come home and give the money to her husband
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all these women say that they can't trust the man with the money but they trust them with their
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bodies and my body's a lot more valuable than some money that's true but i can i can um if me
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and my husband are working i'm happy to put my money in a joint account for and to give it to him
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though i don't think the kind of man i'll be with would want it to be seen like that he would probably
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just i think in my head i could be wrong but i just what i i wouldn't mind in my home is we sit down
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we plan and he says you are only allowed to spend this amount of your money you have to put the rest
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in savings i'm okay with that so you you don't mind being the constant because essentially even
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though you're putting into one pot you're the breadwinner no no no no we're saying that we're
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talking about how we manage our money so he he i was i won't use the word control you know
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i don't like saying words but i wouldn't use the word control i'll say but he has a final say
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on how i spend i'm okay with that if he said with you earning more no even if he was earning more
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i'm just making a comment what she said about managing money that was the same thing
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so so you like let's say you earn 100k i don't know what you mean let's just say you earn 100k he
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makes 55 no if he was earning like he's a hard-working man he's a fireman i wouldn't be
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with someone who's a fireman though why shout out to the firemen but it's not why but why not like
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that that could be like a masculine guy it's a good job no no no no no see let's even leave the
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money side of things i i don't want to be thinking i hope he's okay where he is oh okay i can't deal
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with this to do the safety of the job yeah yeah being a police officer all of that i i you know
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i respect women that are with those guys let's say plumber okay let's let's change it to plumber
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it wasn't about they make money anyway so um no 55 you know you know what i'm i'm i'm a mom so we
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do have to make certain like the truth of the matter is we have to compromise a little bit i could be
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with a plumber who's on 50k if he had a plan to not always be on that 50k
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but it's hard now this isn't build a bomb the same build i was just about to say i was just
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about to say that it's hard you the biggest mistake we women make is we date potential
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yeah yeah and hope yeah so it's like yeah but so the answer the answer is no yeah i don't think
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that's a i don't think that's a mistake i have a problem with this though because a lot of women
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seem to do this quite a lot it's like every woman wants a man to to be rich and successful
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no i don't know okay so because you said he needs to have a plan okay sorry sorry so i'm gonna i
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know i'm interrupting you sorry but i think it's based on your age if i'm dating a guy who's like
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if i decide to date younger i cannot expect him to be on certain salaries but if i'm dating a guy
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and i think i prefer to date guys who are like 35 and up i should be seeing your progression by now
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it shouldn't be a woulda coulda shoulda yeah but if i date the other end of the age group then
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i can't expect you to have it all together 50k is still top for some people no but i'm saying
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my point is for some people right but i'm saying like like 50k is still top i couldn't find it
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exactly 50k is good but like 20 30 percent of income do you think you're you're top 20 30 percent
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of women yeah what financially no i'm talking about what men value i've left that one to
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say i've accepted my fate but what one thing is i i know my i know my person i know my traits
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and i think as a woman you have to know your behavior i don't think that's a problem i think
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and this is why i pulled it up because a lot of women seem to have this i don't want to find
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a guy's potential whatever whatever the age if a guy's making around 55k we know the statistics
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around what percentage of men make that money yeah so then how unrealistic is most women's
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perspective on okay so i agree that some women think they should have certain things because
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they see other women having it but you don't know what those women are doing to get what
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they what they have i either they're working hard or the things they accept in their home
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very true you can't even accept one percent of it so unless unless you have full knowledge
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on people's situations don't ask for what you don't know what they're making 50 bags
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well the moment i know they are no no no okay okay okay so by and large holistically
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yeah fair but that's why i say that for me i can't be with a guy who's on 50k because i
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know my traits i know my behavior and unfortunately i will start to resent him and i won't be happy
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so why would i make another man's life miserable because i want to get in a relationship would you
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would you rather be alone or be with a guy that makes significantly less you know logically
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it makes sense for me to be with a guy that has money because i'll be paying less than one
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i'm asking if like if that was your two choices i'm just curious i'll be on my um grace no you
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wouldn't what if he's on 50k you like companionship no no no i like companionship but i i know what
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i'm saying nothing if he's going to be on 50k all his life yeah yeah but imagine this what
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you earn yeah and then you add 50k to that okay or nothing or you don't add anything at all
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and this is what i always talk about about this 50k or these amounts right and this is why i don't
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like talking about it because i think it's unfair let's say me and my husband now decide to go on
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go halves right we go 50 50 he's on 50k i'm on 100 and whatever he's feeling that money he's putting
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down more than i am right but because of the kind of man i want to be with he's probably going to say
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i have to at least contribute half he is gonna in within his within himself and then i come tomorrow
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and go babes when are we going on holiday he's thinking bruh i'm already paying half you know i want
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to go on holiday again so you'd actually rather be by yourself i'd rather be with a guy who is
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working towards something that's not what she said i know that's what he said i'm going to answer the
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question okay no no i'm answering the question i'd rather i'd rather stay on my own and wait for
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someone that i can see going up no there's no way there's no way no i'll be on my own for now
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you'd rather be yeah i know what i've been through yeah but i think it's like easy to say that when
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you're still young young and attractive but like when you're when you're 60 and maybe like maybe the
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clock starts i think when you're older anyway you don't you like i said we've spoken about this when
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you're older i feel like when you get married and all that stuff you're not marrying for help or
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financial you're marrying for companionship yeah but that's that's what i'm saying like like women
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as women i don't think we think about the second half of our lives like we're all gonna live probably
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to be 90 so and your looks are gone at what if you're lucky you might get 50 but like you're no
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guys really checking for 50 year olds so like what are we going to do the second half of our lives
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i think is it fair to say is it fair to say that because arguably you know you you you're still very
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much competitive in the market you're like okay well i'm still gonna i'm still gonna maintain these
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standards because i believe it's still very much achievable but then i don't know in like 15 years
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time you might be like okay maybe i should actually focus on having a companion as opposed to how much
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yeah yeah my needs will be different then right because yeah so right now my needs are different but
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i think my beliefs and my way of thinking is based on my traumas and experience not that i'm still
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holding my traumas or whatever i've let go i'm i'm good but right now i'm i'm so stubborn in my mindset
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of i don't want to make certain mistakes i'd rather be patient because i think i was very impatient
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i think a lot of the situations i found myself is my lack of patience so now i'm trying patience
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do you understand so this is the approach i'm taking do you think anything happens like you
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accomplish anything through patience like do you know i'm saying like yeah like wouldn't you say
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success is hard work and like like getting what you want you have to work at it and go for it
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rather than just like hoping it comes to you i'm just i'm just talking about what i've been for
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germany and i think some of the things that i think maybe if i was patient more patient i might not
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got married to the person i got married to if i was more patient to pay attention to the certain
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things i would have picked up certain things and certain things wouldn't happen that's why i'm
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saying i'm taking on patience during this journey yeah okay um i think i'm gonna close out the show
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um i'm gonna read super chats in a second um but everyone think of final thoughts you can tell
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