JustPearlyThings - April 15, 2023


The Entire Panel STRUGGLED To Answer This Question...


Episode Stats

Length

9 minutes

Words per Minute

220.1008

Word Count

2,198

Sentence Count

160

Misogynist Sentences

9

Hate Speech Sentences

9


Summary

In this episode, we talk about how important it is to have enough money to sustain a relationship. How much money does a guy need to have in order to be a good man? Is there a difference between having enough money and having a good relationship?


Transcript

00:00:00.000 A guy being in touch with his masculinity
00:00:02.160 is what makes him attractive
00:00:03.320 and he doesn't need money for that.
00:00:04.520 But we were given that option.
00:00:06.240 Yeah, he doesn't need money for that.
00:00:08.220 The question was, money or looks?
00:00:10.220 Yeah.
00:00:11.060 Money, we're into it.
00:00:12.380 Exactly.
00:00:12.920 But one thing also,
00:00:14.560 when, first of all,
00:00:16.100 money can just tell you more about his ambition.
00:00:19.220 That's what I was saying.
00:00:19.880 Yeah, it's up to something.
00:00:22.080 Fitness is more important than money, for sure,
00:00:24.160 because your body, your health,
00:00:26.200 will give you everything.
00:00:27.560 Mental health.
00:00:28.160 You can have your money today,
00:00:29.220 you'll lose it tomorrow
00:00:30.260 and you will be left alone
00:00:32.280 with the girl that you picked
00:00:33.460 and you'll be with the man that you picked.
00:00:35.740 And it's a duty to work a life together.
00:00:38.340 That's a commitment to a relationship.
00:00:39.760 Would you guys agree that if your guy was unemployed,
00:00:42.200 he only has so much time
00:00:43.640 before you would leave?
00:00:45.660 Yes or no?
00:00:46.440 No, depends on the context.
00:00:47.760 So, like, let's say five years, no job.
00:00:49.920 Oh, that's a bit crazy.
00:00:50.920 Like, no job at all.
00:00:52.540 No.
00:00:53.520 I need, I believe
00:00:55.300 that the man is the lead.
00:00:59.100 Like, he is the one that takes charge.
00:01:01.200 And if he doesn't hold that up,
00:01:04.220 I just feel like,
00:01:05.540 I couldn't stay with someone that's just,
00:01:07.020 there needs to be a drive.
00:01:08.220 When you're working, there's a drive,
00:01:09.700 there's a motivation.
00:01:10.740 Like, you're working, I'm working.
00:01:12.440 Like, we're in this together.
00:01:13.560 But, like, I couldn't be with a man that's just,
00:01:15.960 that's no motivation.
00:01:16.880 For me, that's just being lazy.
00:01:18.180 If I'm being honest.
00:01:19.380 I think it depends, you know,
00:01:20.540 because it depends if he's willing to work,
00:01:23.080 if he's motivated to work.
00:01:24.180 Whereas if he's not motivated and he's fine,
00:01:25.960 he's just chilling with no job,
00:01:27.600 no money for five years,
00:01:28.560 then it's a bit of a problem.
00:01:29.320 But if he's motivated,
00:01:30.700 he knows what he wants to do,
00:01:31.640 he's just working towards his goals,
00:01:33.080 or he's willing to work towards his goals,
00:01:35.220 then I feel like, that's okay.
00:01:36.960 Like, we've all taken time out for ourselves.
00:01:38.860 Five years!
00:01:40.140 You don't know what he's,
00:01:40.860 he might want to be a doctor.
00:01:42.040 You don't know what he wants to do, baby.
00:01:43.720 You don't know what he wants to do.
00:01:44.780 Three months.
00:01:45.320 But, like, obviously, everyone's different,
00:01:46.840 and we're all quite young as well.
00:01:48.680 No.
00:01:49.040 No, five years is a stretch.
00:01:50.160 I don't believe that.
00:01:50.720 Everyone has their own opinion.
00:01:51.900 Like, a side hustle.
00:01:53.880 A hard time job.
00:01:55.140 No job.
00:01:55.920 Would you say a side hustle, Pearl,
00:01:58.220 is a job?
00:01:59.980 Would you class it as the same thing?
00:02:01.360 A side hustle and a job?
00:02:04.540 So, for example, like, OnlyFans.
00:02:06.800 I mean, it's a job.
00:02:09.000 It's still a job.
00:02:10.600 For a man.
00:02:11.720 For a guy.
00:02:14.280 I think it's a job.
00:02:15.400 It's not a career.
00:02:16.460 Okay, yeah, yeah.
00:02:17.100 But it depends on the side hustle.
00:02:18.580 Yeah, yeah.
00:02:19.220 It's a broad, you know.
00:02:20.460 Yeah, it's a very broad.
00:02:22.080 This is an extreme example, too, right?
00:02:23.700 Like, there's, like, gradients.
00:02:25.040 Are you talking about, like,
00:02:26.600 does a guy need to be rich
00:02:27.640 versus, like, have just enough?
00:02:29.520 You're talking about, like, unemployed, right?
00:02:31.080 My only point was at some point,
00:02:32.680 if he's not making enough money,
00:02:34.580 we're going to leave.
00:02:35.480 Yeah.
00:02:35.600 At some point, right?
00:02:37.000 Yeah, no, I would agree with that.
00:02:38.340 But I'm saying, like,
00:02:38.980 if the guy has, like,
00:02:39.640 his basic needs met,
00:02:41.040 like, I've found it doesn't really
00:02:42.380 make much of a difference
00:02:43.220 if he has, like, a ton of money,
00:02:44.840 except for certain girls.
00:02:46.120 Not in the real world.
00:02:46.800 I thought he meant, like, jobless.
00:02:48.260 What's the difference?
00:02:49.360 Okay, is it different
00:02:50.420 in the Eastern European countries
00:02:52.120 versus the West?
00:02:53.360 Yes.
00:02:53.880 I mean, in terms of money.
00:02:55.600 Yeah.
00:02:55.960 I mean, yeah,
00:02:56.220 because most people are poor, right?
00:02:57.460 Like, in Ukraine and Poland,
00:02:59.320 even in Brazil,
00:02:59.840 like, people are making, like,
00:03:01.940 $1,000 a month or less.
00:03:03.860 So, like, you know,
00:03:04.960 it's, like, $10,000 a year
00:03:05.920 or less than $10,000 a year
00:03:06.980 after taxes.
00:03:08.260 So, I mean, you know,
00:03:10.660 it goes back to those
00:03:11.680 as basic needs met, right?
00:03:13.740 If basic needs are met,
00:03:14.720 I haven't found that
00:03:15.580 it makes much of a difference
00:03:16.320 because I've had so many rich clients
00:03:17.540 that are all clueless.
00:03:18.480 Like, they're all in their,
00:03:19.260 they're, like, millionaire circles
00:03:20.360 and like, hey,
00:03:21.260 we thought this would get us the girls
00:03:22.540 and we got all the money
00:03:23.720 and there's no girls.
00:03:24.640 And then I have clients
00:03:25.720 that have hardly any money
00:03:27.240 that just crush
00:03:28.500 once they're doing things right.
00:03:29.560 And the girl doesn't even know
00:03:30.260 they don't have money.
00:03:31.560 But again, like,
00:03:32.180 we're talking about, like,
00:03:33.300 unemployed, like,
00:03:34.940 completely broke for years
00:03:36.100 versus at least having
00:03:37.400 basic needs met.
00:03:38.120 Like, a lot of guys,
00:03:39.440 like, even if they're not
00:03:40.060 doing super well,
00:03:40.780 what's the statistic?
00:03:41.460 It's like 80% of people
00:03:42.300 are living paycheck to paycheck
00:03:43.440 in the U.S., I think,
00:03:45.060 is something like that.
00:03:46.400 So...
00:03:46.560 That high? Wow.
00:03:47.360 I'm pretty sure, yeah.
00:03:48.240 So it's like,
00:03:48.780 if they don't get paid one week,
00:03:50.040 they can't pay the bills.
00:03:51.220 That's, like, almost all guys, right?
00:03:53.500 So, all this, like,
00:03:55.280 focus on,
00:03:56.060 oh, you need to go
00:03:56.480 make a lot of money.
00:03:57.320 There's a lot of creators
00:03:58.020 that say, like,
00:03:58.540 forget dating.
00:03:59.460 Just go focus on making money.
00:04:01.860 When they arrive at the money,
00:04:03.420 if they ever do,
00:04:04.040 most of them don't even get the money.
00:04:05.280 But if they do,
00:04:06.460 it's not like girls
00:04:07.220 just start raining down
00:04:08.200 in their lap, right?
00:04:09.580 Do you guys think that sex
00:04:10.760 is a need that men
00:04:11.840 can't live without?
00:04:14.920 Definitely.
00:04:15.500 I think men use don't say that.
00:04:16.800 I think men, yeah,
00:04:17.940 the men use don't say that.
00:04:18.760 Sex is a need
00:04:19.740 that men can't live without.
00:04:21.320 It depends on what you mean, though.
00:04:23.440 What's the time period?
00:04:24.400 I mean, men clearly live without sex
00:04:26.620 and they're just living on corn.
00:04:28.980 I think if you said...
00:04:30.260 What do you think would happen
00:04:30.820 if there wasn't corn?
00:04:32.100 I think society would be
00:04:34.580 very violent, wouldn't it?
00:04:36.020 I think if you get a lot of men,
00:04:38.080 you say in the animal kingdom,
00:04:39.180 isn't it?
00:04:39.400 It's the same sort of thing,
00:04:40.280 isn't it?
00:04:40.520 That's true.
00:04:40.640 You get, you know,
00:04:41.740 one alpha male
00:04:42.740 that's got all the females
00:04:43.500 and the others are always
00:04:44.160 fighting them for position.
00:04:45.200 Yeah, that's true.
00:04:45.600 Willing to fight to the death.
00:04:46.500 I think you'd get
00:04:46.980 quite a violent society
00:04:47.940 and that's one of the reasons
00:04:49.380 why monogamy came about
00:04:50.600 was to stop that
00:04:51.440 because if you have men
00:04:52.680 that are not having sex
00:04:53.640 and they're not getting
00:04:54.140 that frustration, I guess, out,
00:04:55.700 they're going to take it out
00:04:56.560 in society.
00:04:57.120 I think if you took away
00:04:57.880 corn away from men,
00:04:59.320 I think men's mental health
00:05:00.420 would suffer tremendously,
00:05:02.400 probably more so than women.
00:05:03.420 So is corn a net positive
00:05:05.440 or a net negative?
00:05:07.140 It depends on how you see it.
00:05:08.860 I think it can be a negative
00:05:10.300 because it creates,
00:05:11.880 it creates like a false,
00:05:14.340 like a fantasy
00:05:15.120 and so when, you know,
00:05:17.520 you do go out with guys,
00:05:19.360 they might be,
00:05:19.920 like they might be
00:05:20.900 more forward with sex
00:05:22.340 or certain things
00:05:24.320 because they've seen
00:05:25.140 certain things.
00:05:25.900 They might have
00:05:26.360 that expectation.
00:05:27.820 So I feel like sometimes
00:05:29.160 it can be quite pressuring
00:05:30.640 and it can,
00:05:32.220 I think sometimes as well
00:05:33.860 that corn is sometimes
00:05:38.700 like devaluing women.
00:05:40.380 I don't know,
00:05:40.960 like it's kind of,
00:05:41.680 it doesn't,
00:05:42.440 it doesn't make sex
00:05:43.420 feel special.
00:05:44.920 Yeah.
00:05:45.860 I don't think it makes it more,
00:05:47.060 like you were saying earlier,
00:05:48.140 like the intimacy
00:05:49.120 just creates a fantasy.
00:05:50.700 Sometimes I could see
00:05:53.940 where corn is a net negative
00:05:55.860 for guys in an individual level,
00:05:57.940 but I'm just going to play
00:06:00.720 devil's advocate here.
00:06:02.480 I also think it's helped
00:06:04.220 a lot of guys stay faithful
00:06:05.520 in sexless marriages.
00:06:06.600 I was going to say that.
00:06:07.880 I was going to say that.
00:06:08.740 Yeah, 100%.
00:06:09.460 So it's so true.
00:06:10.860 I think there's a place for it
00:06:11.920 because imagine you're
00:06:12.640 one of these guys
00:06:13.320 and your wife has had a kid
00:06:14.880 or two kids or whatever.
00:06:15.760 She's just dealing with life.
00:06:17.160 And I personally,
00:06:17.980 I'm a believer in marriage.
00:06:19.040 I mean,
00:06:19.160 we're getting married soon,
00:06:20.100 right?
00:06:20.280 I believe in marriage,
00:06:21.240 right?
00:06:21.840 I believe if that can keep you
00:06:23.800 going through that period,
00:06:26.640 it's better to engage in that
00:06:28.000 than to actually cheat.
00:06:29.180 Cheat, yeah.
00:06:29.740 And you're going to risk
00:06:30.500 a hell of a lot.
00:06:31.260 And I think corn
00:06:32.020 from that point of view
00:06:32.940 is good,
00:06:33.580 but I think too much of it,
00:06:35.480 like anything,
00:06:36.020 is the issue.
00:06:37.100 There's also an issue
00:06:37.120 where guys don't want
00:06:38.200 to go out and do anything
00:06:39.180 because they're so addicted
00:06:40.180 to corn.
00:06:40.540 Yeah,
00:06:40.940 they're addicted to it.
00:06:41.020 It stops them being
00:06:41.860 about their purpose.
00:06:42.640 They've got these
00:06:43.560 unrealistic views of women
00:06:45.020 and for some men,
00:06:46.040 especially men that are
00:06:47.480 more prone to that,
00:06:48.780 it might make them
00:06:49.460 even more violent
00:06:50.120 because they go out
00:06:50.740 and demand it of women.
00:06:52.760 And some men do it by force.
00:06:53.860 I mean,
00:06:54.040 most sexual assault is men,
00:06:56.000 are the perpetrators of it.
00:06:57.080 And I think how much
00:06:58.020 is corn to blame for that?
00:06:59.660 You know,
00:07:00.040 and I think it's tapping
00:07:00.740 into some ancient
00:07:01.660 biological processes of men.
00:07:02.780 You think corn
00:07:02.840 increases sexual assault?
00:07:04.940 I think it,
00:07:05.740 I don't see why
00:07:06.800 it would not
00:07:07.320 because if men are
00:07:08.540 frustrated at home
00:07:09.680 and all they know
00:07:10.640 is just being online,
00:07:11.520 at some point,
00:07:11.980 you might want the real thing.
00:07:13.240 I would think it would do,
00:07:14.440 I don't know,
00:07:15.160 but I would think
00:07:15.740 it would do the opposite
00:07:16.540 because it gives them
00:07:18.160 a release
00:07:19.040 instead of going out.
00:07:19.940 But you've seen some issues
00:07:21.360 where men have actually
00:07:22.860 assaulted women
00:07:23.540 where they've had
00:07:24.080 this addiction
00:07:24.640 and they want to play out
00:07:25.920 in real life.
00:07:26.900 You see it that often.
00:07:28.300 It's a fantasy
00:07:28.900 and they want to play it
00:07:29.640 in real life
00:07:30.160 and they go by the point.
00:07:31.060 I haven't seen one.
00:07:32.840 Was there something
00:07:33.580 in the news?
00:07:34.480 I've never seen that.
00:07:35.520 Wasn't that a policeman
00:07:36.280 that actually got done
00:07:37.260 for that,
00:07:37.680 addicted to that?
00:07:38.460 The one that Sarah Edvard
00:07:39.700 I also had that.
00:07:41.120 I think he had
00:07:41.980 a porn addiction,
00:07:43.380 did he not?
00:07:43.940 The one that actually
00:07:44.620 dragged the woman
00:07:45.120 off the streets
00:07:46.120 in Clapham.
00:07:47.140 I think he had
00:07:47.820 an addiction with porn,
00:07:48.720 if I'm not right.
00:07:49.060 We don't want porn.
00:07:50.800 Sorry,
00:07:51.400 we're corn because
00:07:52.280 you know,
00:07:54.180 and it's natural,
00:07:55.180 isn't it?
00:07:55.460 If that's all you know
00:07:56.300 is the virtual version
00:07:57.340 of something,
00:07:58.340 at some point
00:07:58.980 it's quite easy
00:07:59.560 to spill over
00:08:00.280 into wanting
00:08:00.820 a real version of it.
00:08:01.600 Do you think it's the same
00:08:02.280 thing with video games?
00:08:03.380 Like men that play video games
00:08:04.800 are going to be more violent?
00:08:06.300 Because I'm pretty sure
00:08:06.980 the evidence
00:08:07.400 was the opposite with that.
00:08:08.740 I definitely don't play video games
00:08:10.520 as well.
00:08:10.840 I agree with that.
00:08:11.500 I think that is true as well
00:08:13.220 because,
00:08:14.020 for example,
00:08:14.780 I don't know about,
00:08:16.240 not really in the UK,
00:08:17.340 but I heard about
00:08:18.320 a lot of school shootings
00:08:19.460 with like young people
00:08:21.360 in America.
00:08:22.900 Like it's always to do
00:08:23.920 with guns
00:08:24.500 and always to do with,
00:08:26.340 yeah,
00:08:26.620 like those kind of
00:08:27.320 like video games.
00:08:28.340 So I think that
00:08:28.880 definitely has an impact
00:08:30.520 as well.
00:08:30.940 But then that's like,
00:08:32.520 everything has an impact
00:08:33.980 with social media
00:08:34.860 and with technology
00:08:35.620 because even what we see
00:08:37.500 online might change
00:08:38.720 the way that we move
00:08:39.900 or we look.
00:08:41.280 So everything does,
00:08:42.420 I think.
00:08:43.220 But I think it's only
00:08:43.840 going to amplify
00:08:44.460 what's already there.
00:08:45.760 What's already there,
00:08:46.460 yeah.
00:08:47.380 So if you're someone
00:08:47.900 that's that way inclined,
00:08:48.960 then yeah,
00:08:49.260 it might amplify.
00:08:49.820 But I think for most people,
00:08:51.380 playing video games
00:08:52.020 is a way to safely
00:08:53.040 indulge in your fantasies
00:08:54.640 in the same way
00:08:55.420 with corn.
00:08:55.780 Yeah,
00:08:56.220 exactly.
00:08:56.680 With corn,
00:08:57.260 like that statistic
00:08:58.660 you cited,
00:08:59.520 it's almost one
00:09:00.060 in three guys.
00:09:00.700 So it's getting
00:09:01.100 like really high
00:09:01.740 and I think it's
00:09:02.300 like still upward
00:09:03.540 trending, right?
00:09:04.100 So who knows
00:09:04.580 where that's going to end.
00:09:05.720 But when a guy
00:09:06.560 can just,
00:09:07.340 you know,
00:09:07.580 safely like go watch corn
00:09:09.560 and deal with that desire
00:09:11.160 and not have to put
00:09:12.140 himself out there
00:09:12.720 and not get his ego bruised
00:09:13.860 or not face,
00:09:14.700 you know,
00:09:14.920 potential legal consequences
00:09:15.980 or anything like that.
00:09:17.100 Plus most guys
00:09:17.780 have no idea
00:09:18.320 what to do anyways,
00:09:19.980 right?
00:09:20.260 And what I've noticed
00:09:21.360 with so many of my clients
00:09:22.140 is guys genuinely
00:09:23.520 will put in time
00:09:24.240 and effort,
00:09:24.660 in some cases money
00:09:25.400 with all of these companies
00:09:26.160 that are supposed
00:09:27.600 to help them
00:09:28.220 and they still fail.
00:09:30.100 And then they're like,
00:09:30.760 well,
00:09:30.860 what now?
00:09:31.820 Isn't it meant to like
00:09:32.740 rewire your brain chemistry
00:09:34.060 or something though?
00:09:35.660 Like I just don't feel,
00:09:36.520 I don't see a world
00:09:37.360 where it is a good thing,
00:09:38.240 I can't lie.
00:09:39.380 It's not do or die.
00:09:40.880 You will survive
00:09:41.980 without it.
00:09:42.800 I don't think it's a good thing.
00:09:44.220 I was just banned
00:09:45.220 on TikTok
00:09:46.100 and we are demonetized
00:09:47.820 on a daily basis
00:09:49.080 on this platform.
00:09:50.880 If you want to help,
00:09:52.360 please consider sending
00:09:53.480 a super thanks below.
00:09:55.420 Every donation helps
00:09:56.720 and it helps make
00:09:57.560 what we do possible.