There MIGHT Be TRUTH In THIS
Episode Stats
Words per Minute
231.56119
Summary
In this episode, we discuss the selfishness of not having children and whether or not it is selfish to not have a child. We discuss the pros and cons of not wanting to have children and what it really means to be selfish in the modern world.
Transcript
00:00:00.000
i was about to ask do you guys think it's selfish women that do that
00:00:04.560
depends and this is for the men too you guys can yeah it depends on their situation
00:00:09.360
it depends on what i mean the situation is there's no dad okay yeah but he isn't there
00:00:16.640
it might not have been the choice you know so okay let's let's take me i don't have kids let's
00:00:20.800
say i'm 35. would it be selfish in this situation i'm 35 and i no prospects it's just you know my
00:00:29.120
dms are a desert it's horrible and so i say you know what i i want a child so i'm i'm gonna go to
00:00:36.960
the ivf clinic and i'm gonna do it or i'm gonna i don't i don't know i don't know the science behind
00:00:41.760
it but i don't think it's selfish but i think you need to think about you know what can you offer
00:00:48.320
the child can you because you want your child to grow up in certain conditions right so do you have
00:00:54.160
enough money to provide for the child do you have maybe have a male figure around you um maybe your
00:01:00.720
brother your dad that can still support your child as a man so you don't think it's selfish to expect
00:01:06.800
that out of them no because again before you have a child i would have locked that in i would have
00:01:13.760
already like thought about these things do i have money for this do i have men around me that can support
00:01:20.400
my child that can offer that guidance if i don't then i'm then i may not have a child because again
00:01:28.080
it's a life you want to offer someone the best life that you can give right if i'm not in that
00:01:33.200
position i'm not going to have a child okay what do you guys think well you said no prospects so i'd
00:01:38.400
say that's kind of selfish what are you really bringing to the table as like oh as a sole person
00:01:44.800
you're not really bringing like the love and the support you might be able to to a certain extent
00:01:49.360
but by yourself that's hard like i wouldn't really want to wish that on someone okay i think if it's
00:01:55.280
a choice for you to bring a child into this world by yourself and then look after the child by yourself
00:02:00.720
i think that is selfish because yeah and what about you china yeah i'll just i was just waiting to see
00:02:07.040
if anyone's gonna say it wasn't selfish but yeah it's incredibly selfish to to bring a child into the
00:02:11.680
world and do it by by those types of means yeah okay i feel like i feel like having a kid in general
00:02:20.560
is kind of selfish even though you mentioned pearl earlier you said that having a not having a kid
00:02:25.440
was selfish i think like having a kid is inherently quite selfish let's take a moment to think about
00:02:30.960
the world that we live in today let's think about politics let's think about financials let's think about
00:02:35.200
everything that comes into being an adult in the world that we live in today the lowest rates of
00:02:39.840
poverty ever in human history yeah but human history is first of all like let's think about
00:02:45.600
it comparatively i mean if you genuinely really genuinely want children of course you can have
00:02:50.480
children but if you're having children because you feel like you need to that's different what's
00:02:55.040
wrong with the like the world today is great especially in the west it is better than it's ever been but
00:03:00.080
it's great it's phenomenal so were your parents selfish for having you they're rubbing my face
00:03:05.520
all the time no but i'm just asking you no i think they are how many siblings do you have i have
00:03:09.840
two so there's three of you so your parents were incredibly selfish for having you guys and the thing
00:03:14.400
is i feel like my parents do have a lot of regret in terms of having children especially so so you
00:03:19.520
wish you wasn't alive do you feel like you feel like you don't want to be alive that's not what i'm
00:03:23.920
saying because before a fetus is born they don't even know what life is that's not i'm asking you
00:03:28.640
said it's incredibly selfish and you're saying but i'm saying you come from a family of three
00:03:32.560
um so do you consider your life to be selfish i'm not gonna say on camera that i wish i was there
00:03:37.280
please don't there's no need to swear we're just having a conversation you don't need to swear
00:03:40.800
but no but you're swearing the conversation someone is quite rude i wasn't trying to be rude i was just
00:03:44.720
swearing like i normally talk i know but it's not quite okay so when you when you meet somebody you've
00:03:49.600
never met somebody for the first time to swear when you speak to that person we consider it's
00:03:53.600
considered quite rude so we're on a platform and we're talking to like a thousand thousand people
00:03:58.160
the tone that you're using towards her it's quite rude it's fucking rude i'm not gonna lie
00:04:04.560
okay okay so hold on a second because i was not being rude hold on a second hold on a second i've
00:04:10.160
just literally just spoke i haven't done anything you're baiting her guys have i raised my voice no
00:04:14.720
have i said anything derogatory wait hold on a second wait you're stopping me it's really rude you did
00:04:18.640
say no i haven't i haven't said does she wish that she's alive no i asked her a question i asked her
00:04:23.840
question i asked her question you keep interrupting so nothing about my tone so the problem of so what
00:04:28.400
we seem to find is when men speak and when we speak directly we always get women that try to speak to
00:04:31.920
us about a tone there's nothing wrong with my tone i haven't raised it she literally just said it so
00:04:36.720
could you just could you check your friend for oh check the lady next to you and say there's nothing
00:04:39.520
wrong with his tone i don't know you can check me directly no but the thing is no but the thing is
00:04:44.560
the thing is directly if you want to no but the thing is i am and everyone now you're raising your voice
00:04:48.320
no because so what you're doing is yeah you're gaslighting the situation this is what you women
00:04:52.480
do this is not what no no no no this is you guys are this is a classic he didn't do anything let me
00:04:56.400
teach you let me teach you no no let me teach you i think i think the question was a bit wow but
00:05:02.560
that's why we're on a podcast the question is right so what you guys are doing again you guys are
00:05:06.240
stopping the man from speaking i tried several times on this platform to speak oh now i'm waiting not
00:05:10.240
you but what you've done is first of all you gaslight that situation by saying about my tone i didn't
00:05:14.160
raise my tone i didn't speak you didn't see what you're doing again is see guys guys so so so this
00:05:20.400
is a so this is a good platform so i want the super chats to look at look at this this is an
00:05:24.080
this is an example of gaslighting i simply asked a question because she said it was selfish for um
00:05:28.880
for people having children right now so i asked her do you consider it to be selfish for your parents
00:05:32.480
to have had you as a child um she was you know thinking about it that's fine of her to think about
00:05:36.640
it but she swore at me so i've never met this lady it's the first time i met her and she swore
00:05:40.560
at me so i just said could you please not swear and i swear at me on a platform what you've then
00:05:43.840
said to me is about my tone if anything i would actually be quite in my right if someone swore at
00:05:48.240
me so bro what she actually responded has just said she's naturally swears anyway so so as much as
00:05:54.560
you're in your world in your rights to be offended about what she said because you don't know her you
00:05:58.400
don't know and you're yourself your own person you have your boundaries okay so you're allowed to
00:06:03.280
feel the way you feel so she just so do you make do you think do you think the world owes you any
00:06:08.080
understanding so if you've never met somebody and you meet them for the first time do you think
00:06:11.280
the world owes your understanding to be like i can just f i'm blind at you do you think i owe
00:06:14.800
your understanding no you've never been to east london babe i'm not saying the world necessarily owes
00:06:21.600
her understanding she just said that to almost like to comfort you like it's all right i didn't mean
00:06:27.360
it so let's use this example right guys so let's use the example right so there's nothing wrong so
00:06:31.680
there's nothing wrong with my tone i haven't raised my tone i haven't pointed at you i haven't shouted at
00:06:35.680
you okay okay no no he didn't stop it it's easy it's easy it's easy he did point at me he was doing
00:06:42.720
she she sees like he did yeah she i didn't so so you know what it is you know what it is i find it
00:06:49.520
so i don't i don't want to do this pearl i'm going to say this as a black man and i'm going to do that
00:06:54.160
i find it this is this is a scenario that that we find ourselves in i haven't done anything i haven't
00:06:59.360
shouted at you i haven't been aggressive to you i haven't sworn at you but yet you no but what yet you
00:07:04.160
have continued to you talk about my tone you've tried to create an image of me a perpetual image
00:07:07.920
of me on screen which is not that i was sworn to on live on the air that's all i said was can you
00:07:13.120
please not sweat no no it's fine but we're not talking about you now what we're talking about
00:07:16.960
is her gaslight in a scenario and she's spoken about about the tone she's trying to act like i've been
00:07:21.040
aggressive to her guys the super chats and everything will let you know because i really
00:07:24.720
haven't done it you guys have jumped on top of me but it's fine i'm ready for this let's go switch the
00:07:28.400
situation if she if she no no no no stop stop stop if you're offended i apologize but i'm not
00:07:34.320
trying to offend you we switch it we switch if we switch the the they're not the racist the genders
00:07:40.960
here if a girl says that to a guy could you please not swear at me it wouldn't be a thing
00:07:44.880
and like and that's the thing whenever men have standards they're shamed for having standards constantly
00:07:49.520
yeah it wasn't a thing in the first place he said i swore at him i'm swearing as i talk the way i
00:07:55.760
talk occasionally i might throw a fuck or shit like i'm just having a conversation because i feel
00:08:01.360
like a little bit more comfortable if you don't want me to swear at you that's completely fine
00:08:05.200
it was quite simple i simply said and i just made you aware of it i didn't actually get at you i just
00:08:08.960
simply said could you please not swear at me you don't know you're unaware of it but what's happens
00:08:12.720
from there i can't believe what's happening just simply a man saying please don't swear at me
00:08:16.000
and you guys have used it as a situation to gaslight instead about my tone and even if i did lose
00:08:20.560
lose my rag a little bit why are you swearing at a man that you've never met before and the first
00:08:24.160
time on the platform is very disrespectful i was not swearing at you no no no no no right now this
00:08:29.280
is not even about this no no no no because i'm not actually offended by what you said i just simply
00:08:33.440
said you could please not swear at me said okay that's cool what she's then gone on to do is create
00:08:37.120
a whole separate scenario now and i want to know why have you done that i was sticking up for her
00:08:42.080
because i felt like the question just was a little insensitive and kind of to say that just the way it
00:08:49.120
was worded i didn't like so you don't think i was i was in my right to ask her considering she said
00:08:53.600
no not about the swearing i understand no no no about the swearing she said that i just said
00:08:58.320
being selfish right so i just said do you consider your existence and your siblings existence to be
00:09:03.520
selfish based upon the question that she put out there i simply just gave her counter question it
00:09:08.240
was the way it was how was it worded oh my gosh no i want to know i'm so bored of this conversation no no no
00:09:13.360
because this is an example no we're not going to do this because what you women do is you man you
00:09:17.520
might guess like you guys guys like men and then we when we actually want to prove a point you're
00:09:21.440
like let's move it on we're not going to move it on i want to know no because i want to know what
00:09:26.240
what led to the point where you can start saying about my tone and start a disrespect what led to it
00:09:30.000
what did i say to her you said to her about do you wish that you weren't alive or something along
00:09:34.480
them lines it was worded that way and i just thought oh that's a little bit too much but that came after
00:09:38.960
the fact that she said she considered it to be selfish i do think the question was a bit whoa
00:09:48.080
and we're all about no we're all about it's on top i thought it was a great question after what
00:09:56.400
she had said i wouldn't be like why are you asking me that it makes sense because even me i was kind
00:10:00.480
of like yeah do you not want to be here i was about to answer i'm sitting here like i'm not gonna lie
00:10:05.120
sometimes i have my days so i don't think personally but i can see why someone else might
00:10:12.640
be a bit like i don't know you whoa do you understand so even if she threw in the little
00:10:16.960
the little or whatever i'm i'm i was a bit taken about that you took okay okay okay we're gonna move
00:10:33.280
on um do you guys back row do you guys think it's selfish to um get ivf treatment um and become she
00:10:40.640
used to be a single mother go ahead in the corner yeah yeah go ahead yeah yeah okay you think it's
00:10:47.840
selfish what about you i can understand why people would do it but yeah just denying without a father in
00:10:56.720
the picture it's okay it's not fair yeah it's selfish because ultimately every woman will try to
00:11:02.480
locate a man that can fill that father figure or teach certain things that the partner or the husband
00:11:10.560
or whatever would have taught if they were within a union so it is selfish personally i don't think
00:11:15.920
it's selfish if you have a good support system it works well for you