JustPearlyThings - October 18, 2023


These Overweight Guys Got Mad on the Show When They Heard This Ugly Truth


Episode Stats

Length

32 minutes

Words per Minute

213.59132

Word Count

6,899

Sentence Count

670

Misogynist Sentences

48

Hate Speech Sentences

15


Summary

In this episode, the lads discuss the controversial topic of whether or not Lizzo is leading with her weight, or her talent. They discuss the pros and cons of body positivity vs body image, and why it's important to lead with your talent and not your weight.


Transcript

00:00:00.000 It's like you are promoting them.
00:00:02.000 Sugar Puff, I'm going to pause you there.
00:00:04.000 So in the kindest way.
00:00:06.000 So if someone is big, are you saying that they then do not deserve to be heard or seen because they are big?
00:00:14.000 No, I didn't say that.
00:00:16.000 But are they leading with their weight?
00:00:18.000 I would say if you're leading with your body, then yes, you are leading with your weight.
00:00:23.000 So let's take Lizzo, for example, because she's like right in the center of this topic.
00:00:28.000 What is the example we like to you?
00:00:30.000 Yeah, we love a little Lizzo.
00:00:32.000 So Lizzo is a performer.
00:00:34.000 Great music though, great music.
00:00:35.000 Decent music.
00:00:37.000 Not a Lizzo fan.
00:00:39.000 Well, do you know what? I've never heard one of her songs because her music doesn't appeal to me.
00:00:42.000 But I know that she's right in the center of body positivity, her music notwithstanding.
00:00:48.000 So let's take Lizzo, for example.
00:00:50.000 A lot of people slate her because she apparently leads with her weight.
00:00:53.000 She wears revealing clothing.
00:00:55.000 And I've seen on the other end of that argument, you've got people who compare her to, say, Rihanna or Beyonce.
00:01:02.000 They wear similar clothing, but their shape is very different.
00:01:05.000 I would argue that Lizzo, A, is actually potentially quite fit because she performs for long periods of time.
00:01:11.000 Maybe fit is the wrong word.
00:01:14.000 She is fit and she eats well.
00:01:15.000 I haven't finished talking.
00:01:16.000 The evidence is online.
00:01:17.000 Sugar Puff, I haven't finished talking.
00:01:18.000 One second.
00:01:19.000 So I would say that A, she maybe has a lot of stamina because she performs for a long period of time.
00:01:25.000 I think she plays the flute sometimes when she performs and she dances and she sings.
00:01:29.000 That's a lot to do in, let's say, 90 minutes all at the same time.
00:01:32.000 There's a lot going on there.
00:01:33.000 So I applaud her stamina.
00:01:34.000 Also, I could never be a Walmart Lizzo at all.
00:01:38.000 So I would say that with Lizzo being at the center of the body positivity discussion, we should probably look at her stamina, A.
00:01:48.000 B, we should say that is she leading with her weight or does she just exist as a fat person who's on stage because of her career choice?
00:01:54.000 I would say Adele did not lead with her weight.
00:01:57.000 Nobody really commented on Adele's weight because she did not lead with that.
00:02:02.000 She led with her talent.
00:02:03.000 If you looked at her Instagram, it was her in long, beautiful dresses singing.
00:02:07.000 No one really talked about it until she lost weight.
00:02:10.000 On the other hand, Lizzo, if you look at her Instagram, it damn near looks like corn.
00:02:14.000 It's her in thong bikini.
00:02:16.000 She wore a thong thing to a basketball game with kids at it in the name of body positivity.
00:02:23.000 Sometimes I think it's a joke.
00:02:24.000 That's what we mean.
00:02:25.000 Kelly Clarkson, right?
00:02:26.000 I think people may have commented on it because she did gain a lot of weight.
00:02:29.000 People will comment.
00:02:31.000 But it's not the main topic of discussion, Kelly Clarkson, because she leads with her talent.
00:02:37.000 So you think Lizzo dressing the way she dresses?
00:02:40.000 Yes.
00:02:41.000 Let's say on stage.
00:02:42.000 I don't agree with that basketball game at all.
00:02:44.000 The same way I would say an OnlyFans model leads with her sexuality.
00:02:47.000 Like a girl that's on OnlyFans and her Instagram looks like a corn hub, basically.
00:02:53.000 She is leading with her sexuality.
00:02:54.000 How would you have Lizzo dress to not lead with her body?
00:02:57.000 And that's an open question.
00:02:59.000 I would say the thong thingies.
00:03:02.000 It's like a...
00:03:03.000 I would say the all...
00:03:05.000 I would say basically change her whole wardrobe.
00:03:07.000 Look at...
00:03:08.000 I don't know what Adele used to wear.
00:03:11.000 If you look at any girl at a festival nowadays, very revealing clothing.
00:03:14.000 Yeah.
00:03:15.000 So that's probably the trend.
00:03:16.000 But when Lizzo's doing it, it's getting publicized.
00:03:19.000 It's everywhere.
00:03:20.000 It's being pushed by media.
00:03:21.000 And then on top of that, she's proclaiming that she's happy at that weight as well.
00:03:25.000 So she's also leading with that.
00:03:26.000 She's responding to criticism.
00:03:28.000 Why is she getting criticism?
00:03:30.000 Because the majority of people don't find that attractive.
00:03:33.000 And you guys can't...
00:03:34.000 A lot of people can't do anything about that.
00:03:36.000 To the average individual, they don't find fat people attractive.
00:03:39.000 To you, maybe not.
00:03:40.000 I'm telling you, as a big person myself, I'm not going to go out.
00:03:43.000 I get a lot of attention.
00:03:44.000 And I know a lot of big women that get attention.
00:03:47.000 You're talking about a niche.
00:03:48.000 Not niche.
00:03:49.000 No, no, no.
00:03:50.000 Not niche.
00:03:51.000 Not niche.
00:03:52.000 I don't know where you grew up.
00:03:53.000 Where there's skinny, skinny people.
00:03:54.000 But there's a mix.
00:03:56.000 There's literally been a mixture.
00:03:58.000 For real.
00:03:59.000 That's how it's been.
00:04:00.000 I mean, there's always going to be a market for it.
00:04:02.000 I mean, there's categories for it, Sugarpuff.
00:04:04.000 But I'm saying that the majority of people don't find it attractive.
00:04:08.000 That's why they get criticism.
00:04:09.000 And you can say it's whether they're leading with their body or not.
00:04:11.000 But at the end of the day, it's just, she's in the public light.
00:04:14.000 She's a...
00:04:15.000 I think it's three.
00:04:18.000 I got to find it.
00:04:19.000 But it's like three out of five guys will eliminate you based on your weight alone.
00:04:22.000 And they'd eliminate you based on other things as well.
00:04:25.000 Which is completely fine.
00:04:26.000 But I mean, I'm not too concerned about it.
00:04:27.000 Like, a lot of guys would eliminate me because I'm black or because I'm maybe not tall enough.
00:04:31.000 Or too short.
00:04:32.000 Like, you know, it is what it is.
00:04:33.000 Yeah, but it's not being fatphobic.
00:04:35.000 That's not being fatphobic.
00:04:36.000 That's just being...
00:04:37.000 Who said fatphobic?
00:04:38.000 No, as in, it's just preference.
00:04:40.000 Like what you were saying.
00:04:41.000 Exactly.
00:04:42.000 That's what I was about to say before you interrupted.
00:04:43.000 So couldn't you argue that the best dating advice for women is to lose weight?
00:04:46.000 I would say that I have never struggled regardless of my weight.
00:04:50.000 Like, I've been thin and I've been fat.
00:04:52.000 And I have never ever...
00:04:53.000 Like, this is the biggest I've...
00:04:54.000 Well, it's not the biggest because I've lost a stone.
00:04:56.000 But it's almost the biggest I've ever been.
00:04:58.000 And I've never struggled in life.
00:04:59.000 I've always been called pretty.
00:05:00.000 I've always got jobs that, like, are around what I look like.
00:05:04.000 I've done well online, which a lot of people would argue you have to be pretty to do.
00:05:08.000 And I've never been...
00:05:10.000 I can get into the Mayfair clubs.
00:05:11.000 I can do everything that I've ever wanted to do.
00:05:13.000 And I've never felt like I couldn't.
00:05:15.000 Well, I mean, you have youth on your side.
00:05:17.000 You're 26, right?
00:05:18.000 And wouldn't you argue...
00:05:19.000 You told me a different show that you got more attention when you were thinner.
00:05:22.000 Yeah.
00:05:23.000 You still get attention now.
00:05:24.000 I mean, yeah.
00:05:25.000 But I've never struggled.
00:05:26.000 I mean, the attention is a burden a lot of the time for most women.
00:05:29.000 A burden.
00:05:30.000 No, no.
00:05:31.000 Women compete for attention.
00:05:32.000 No.
00:05:33.000 I mean, for me...
00:05:34.000 Women will get BBLs.
00:05:35.000 They will get surgery just to get attention from men.
00:05:38.000 One of my big goals is like...
00:05:39.000 So my audience is split 50-50 male-female on all of my platforms.
00:05:43.000 Okay.
00:05:44.000 My biggest goal is to go to more women.
00:05:46.000 Okay.
00:05:47.000 So at the moment, I'm trying to build on Facebook.
00:05:48.000 And when I target my ads, I target them at women.
00:05:51.000 I tell girly stories.
00:05:52.000 I tell gossipy things.
00:05:53.000 I aim my Twitch as, like, girly, sleepover vibes.
00:05:56.000 Okay.
00:05:57.000 I want men because I don't like that attention.
00:05:59.000 I have a boyfriend.
00:06:00.000 I have a good life.
00:06:01.000 I don't need men, like, nearing at me.
00:06:04.000 Yeah, well, I mean, again, this isn't...
00:06:05.000 But I'm not talking about you personally.
00:06:06.000 Yeah.
00:06:07.000 But I think when we have women getting extreme surgeries just to get attention from men,
00:06:11.000 I think...
00:06:12.000 I think we could say that women do want attention from men.
00:06:14.000 I would just...
00:06:15.000 I would just say that...
00:06:16.000 Have you seen the BBLs?
00:06:17.000 Have you seen them on the planet?
00:06:18.000 Oh, come on.
00:06:19.000 I've seen a lot of boob jobs.
00:06:20.000 I've seen a lot of BBLs.
00:06:21.000 Right.
00:06:22.000 I've seen it in modeling.
00:06:23.000 But, like, what I would say is, like, as a plus size person, I've never felt, like, discriminated against.
00:06:28.000 I've never felt ugly because I was fat.
00:06:30.000 I've never been told I was ugly because I was fat.
00:06:32.000 Other than, like, occasionally in Pearl's chat.
00:06:34.000 But...
00:06:35.000 Do you know what I mean?
00:06:36.000 Doug's...
00:06:37.000 I've just...
00:06:38.000 I've never suffered for that.
00:06:39.000 And so I would never give someone that dating advice because it's never held me back personally.
00:06:43.000 That's...
00:06:44.000 You personally is the key there, isn't it?
00:06:45.000 You personally.
00:06:46.000 It hasn't held you back.
00:06:47.000 But then I guess if we did a survey of fat people, fat women, probably if we're being truthful,
00:06:53.000 being fat has held them back at points, whether they know it or not.
00:06:56.000 Right?
00:06:57.000 I have a question.
00:06:58.000 Do you feel that?
00:06:59.000 I don't.
00:07:00.000 I've never really actively dated, so I can't really say.
00:07:03.000 And also, like, to my own point, it has probably held me back without my knowledge.
00:07:08.000 Okay.
00:07:09.000 There's the seen and then there's the unseen, right?
00:07:11.000 And, you know, there will be what some people in Pearl's chat would call the liberals.
00:07:15.000 They would say that you've got white privilege on your side.
00:07:17.000 I have a question.
00:07:18.000 Like, there's the intersectionality part of it that will go like, well, maybe you haven't been declined jobs
00:07:24.000 because you are desirable in the market for other reasons, like size aside.
00:07:29.000 As much as you're comfortable in your skin, if you were to step on a scale and see some alarming numbers,
00:07:35.000 would you change your lifestyle or would you continue living the same lifestyle that you're living right now?
00:07:41.000 I'm doing it.
00:07:42.000 Yeah, I eat healthy and I am very active.
00:07:45.000 I dance.
00:07:46.000 Like, you see on my social media, I'm not actually trying to promote obesity.
00:07:49.000 Would you change your lifestyle?
00:07:50.000 I am trying to change my lifestyle by keeping it going and actually going through the struggles
00:07:55.000 and literally keeping it going.
00:07:57.000 You are talking to three fat people that none of us here are sitting here being like,
00:08:01.000 everyone should be our way and it's good for us.
00:08:03.000 We're actively saying like, yeah, we need to lose weight.
00:08:05.000 We need to sort out, you know, like, but it's difficult.
00:08:07.000 I commend you for trying to lose weight and good on you.
00:08:09.000 Good luck on the journey.
00:08:10.000 Thank you.
00:08:11.000 But can I just say, it just depends who you guys are deflecting the blame on.
00:08:15.000 Not just to you guys personally, but the fat in general.
00:08:18.000 It's not.
00:08:19.000 Are you blaming other people for calling you guys out?
00:08:22.000 Or do you want to take some personal responsibility?
00:08:24.000 I'm sorry.
00:08:25.000 Hey, it's on me to lose weight.
00:08:26.000 I take on.
00:08:27.000 I'm not delusional.
00:08:29.000 If someone says you're big, you're unhealthy.
00:08:31.000 I'm like, I just tell them, look, man, I try and I'm unhealthy and it is what it is.
00:08:36.000 And that's why I say kindness matters so much because you can actually be, you can influence
00:08:43.000 someone to lose weight just by being kind.
00:08:46.000 And the reason why, gyms are scary.
00:08:48.000 But I think if that was true, then we would see more body positive people lose weight.
00:08:54.000 I'm sorry.
00:08:55.000 Gyms are scary.
00:08:56.000 Do you know what gyms do?
00:08:57.000 Big muscle men and skinny withy men that exercise and they're fast and they can probably poke you
00:09:03.000 and it will hurt.
00:09:04.000 They actually laugh.
00:09:06.000 They actually laugh.
00:09:07.000 They take the piece.
00:09:08.000 But really, when you're in the gym, you're meant to be like, yeah, come on, you can do it
00:09:12.000 and not actually make someone a certain way.
00:09:14.000 You want to hear something?
00:09:15.000 A scale will actually tell you something worse than a human.
00:09:17.000 You know that?
00:09:18.000 Sorry?
00:09:19.000 A scale will tell you something worse than a human.
00:09:21.000 Like saying numbers don't lie.
00:09:23.000 Your numbers don't lie.
00:09:24.000 A scale will speak more like blatant to you than a human.
00:09:28.000 But again, I'm not saying lack again.
00:09:32.000 I'm not promoting eating unhealthy.
00:09:34.000 I'm not promoting don't exercise.
00:09:35.000 Wouldn't you say if someone says you're fat, it's the same thing as if you're tall.
00:09:39.000 It's just a fact.
00:09:40.000 Pearl.
00:09:41.000 It's true.
00:09:42.000 I don't want to get too personal, but I do have health issues.
00:09:45.000 And that's why I that's why to encourage myself.
00:09:48.000 I do the tick tock dancing.
00:09:50.000 I actually go out.
00:09:51.000 I'm active.
00:09:52.000 I went surfing in Cornwall.
00:09:54.000 I went recycling and plastic.
00:09:58.000 I actually did.
00:09:59.000 No, that's my way of exercise.
00:10:00.000 Cause when I go to the gym and when I put too much, I have other issues and my body hurts.
00:10:05.000 And my obesity is starting from childhood.
00:10:08.000 I got you three trainers right here that can go through everything.
00:10:11.000 Do you spend money to do these things?
00:10:12.000 You have to spend money to go Cornwall.
00:10:14.000 Okay.
00:10:15.000 All right.
00:10:16.000 Spend money for a train.
00:10:17.000 Spend money for surfing.
00:10:18.000 My issue started.
00:10:19.000 Is the same way you could spend money on a nutrition coach?
00:10:23.000 One day I will share my story, but a lot of things like just I was unfortunate within life.
00:10:30.000 And that's why I always live a positive life.
00:10:33.000 And I tell people be healthy, eat healthy, exercise.
00:10:37.000 And I will share my story one day, but that's the thing.
00:10:40.000 I don't want to be a story.
00:10:42.000 I don't want to be that person.
00:10:43.000 He's big.
00:10:44.000 And now he's talking about this.
00:10:46.000 He's talking about that.
00:10:47.000 No, I'm not going to be that person because that's what people think.
00:10:51.000 That's what people think a plus size man is.
00:10:54.000 They're just basically there for there.
00:10:56.000 But no, I actually want to push myself.
00:10:58.000 I've got that push in life and that's what I'm doing.
00:11:01.000 And along with that push, because it was so hard all my life.
00:11:06.000 That's why I spread love and positivity because people were just damn right nasty.
00:11:11.000 Can you say though conversations like this are probably better than the body positivity movement?
00:11:18.000 Isn't it more positive?
00:11:19.000 But like I said, when I talk about body positivity, I say it's about accepting yourself.
00:11:23.000 Can you let him finish this sentence?
00:11:25.000 No, I was just saying, wouldn't you say talking openly about it is better than just saying, hey, now I'm happy and comfortable with my own weight and I'm positive.
00:11:34.000 I need to protect my mindset.
00:11:35.000 But actually having, we're civil.
00:11:37.000 We get a long sugar puff.
00:11:38.000 I'm not, we're not going at each other.
00:11:40.000 Everything's all friendly.
00:11:41.000 I'm really enjoying listening to you guys though, because it's educational.
00:11:43.000 Isn't that better than the body positivity movement?
00:11:47.000 Do you know what?
00:11:48.000 It's just, I see when I look at Pearl.
00:11:51.000 Well, sorry.
00:11:52.000 I need to remember your name.
00:11:53.000 John.
00:11:54.000 John.
00:11:55.000 When I look at people, I look into their eyes and I look at their face expressions.
00:12:02.000 And sometimes I see people and I see, and it's with any size or any shape or any body.
00:12:09.000 I see, sometimes I see people have had a hard life and they're trying to keep it going and they smile.
00:12:14.000 And that's why I don't see people in their way or the way they look because people have more to them.
00:12:21.000 And the thing is, I'm all about, like I said.
00:12:24.000 I don't think you're answering his question though.
00:12:26.000 No, but that's, no.
00:12:27.000 Okay.
00:12:28.000 The reason how, the way I'm answering it is, what I'm saying is I see people's soul.
00:12:33.000 And that's why for me, weight, whether you're skinny, fat, small, I literally see people's soul.
00:12:38.000 And the worst, and the crazy thing is, I'm usually right.
00:12:43.000 Like I can, I can look at someone and that's why sometimes when I know people have, when I know, when I can tell people have just, they go through stuff every day, day to day.
00:12:53.000 I'm not going to lie.
00:12:55.000 That's what makes me laugh.
00:12:56.000 That's what makes me happy because I want to encourage them.
00:12:58.000 But what conversation is more productive?
00:13:00.000 I think that for us, this is a productive conversation.
00:13:03.000 So we're three people that have come here.
00:13:05.000 We know what the topic is.
00:13:06.000 We know what we're talking about.
00:13:07.000 And we're willing to sit here on a channel with a million subscribers and talk about it.
00:13:11.000 I think most bad people wouldn't do that.
00:13:14.000 You know, I don't think, I don't think a lot of people, even plus size models, I know personally would not be comfortable to sit here and defend the body positivity movement.
00:13:22.000 And so it's easy for me to say, well, yeah, this is a great conversation.
00:13:25.000 We're going on really well.
00:13:26.000 But do I think that this would make some of my fat friends break down and cry because they don't want to acknowledge the fact that they're having a terrible time?
00:13:33.000 But maybe, maybe they'll cry and then start to lose weight.
00:13:37.000 Sometimes it starts.
00:13:38.000 I'm telling you.
00:13:39.000 Well, Adele cried and lost weight.
00:13:41.000 Adele, you brought up Adele earlier.
00:13:43.000 Let me tell you, Adele went through a breakup.
00:13:45.000 She did not eat.
00:13:46.000 That's how sad she was.
00:13:47.000 She lost weight.
00:13:48.000 All right.
00:13:49.000 All right.
00:13:50.000 All right.
00:13:51.000 All right.
00:13:52.000 I think it could be the first step.
00:13:54.000 You know, I'm serious.
00:13:55.000 When the guys at my work, they had this conversation about how women over 200, whatever, were so fat.
00:14:01.000 I went in the bathroom and I cried.
00:14:03.000 And then I ran a marathon and then I lost weight.
00:14:05.000 You know, there's enough people.
00:14:06.000 That's great.
00:14:07.000 Yeah.
00:14:08.000 I just think, like, instead of getting emotional about it, we should think about solutions.
00:14:12.000 But Pearl...
00:14:13.000 And I'm going to say...
00:14:14.000 Different people have different mechanisms.
00:14:15.000 Wait, wait, wait, go ahead.
00:14:16.000 I'm just going to say, I'm not going to lose sleep if someone is crying when people are just telling the truth.
00:14:21.000 But that doesn't mean it helps.
00:14:23.000 If Pearl is saying...
00:14:24.000 It doesn't matter.
00:14:25.000 Like, you can't just not say what you want to say because you're scared you're going to hurt someone's feelings.
00:14:30.000 You know, at the end of the day, if it's the truth and someone is on the way to where it's unhealthy, they've got to deal with the reality.
00:14:35.000 You can't just say, oh, let's just protect them.
00:14:37.000 Guys, people have different coping mechanisms as well.
00:14:41.000 Please understand.
00:14:42.000 Let them go.
00:14:43.000 Would you rather your friend tell you or would you rather a scale tell you?
00:14:47.000 I'd rather my scale and my friend tell me so I know to actually try actively being active.
00:14:53.000 You turn that into motivation.
00:14:54.000 Why not?
00:14:55.000 Yes, I do turn it.
00:14:56.000 Yeah, exactly.
00:14:57.000 Yeah, I turn it into motivation.
00:14:58.000 You are right, sir.
00:14:59.000 I do need to lose weight.
00:15:01.000 I just think it's a very personal thing.
00:15:03.000 Well, like if my boyfriend came to me and like me and my boyfriend have had this conversation where I've been like, I want to be healthier.
00:15:09.000 I need you to help me.
00:15:10.000 And he's like, okay, well, like my boyfriend has a sweet tooth, but he's a very skinny guy.
00:15:15.000 And like, he's like, okay, I won't eat cake around you.
00:15:17.000 I don't want to tempt you, you know, and we've had those conversations, but they're very vulnerable conversations with people very close to you.
00:15:22.000 I don't think that we should be telling people in general, like about that way.
00:15:25.000 And I think this is the problem.
00:15:27.000 I think as a society, we're too soft.
00:15:29.000 No, I'm sorry.
00:15:30.000 I do tell people.
00:15:31.000 Have you ever had a conversation with like a 70 or 80 year old and you, this is what I mean when I go to my grandma's house at Christmas and they're just like, yeah, you're fat.
00:15:40.000 I don't, I don't, I don't tell my friends that they're fat, but I tell them, look, it's unhealthy.
00:15:44.000 I'm not saying you do that to a stranger on the street, but I think in your social circle, at least somebody should tell you.
00:15:50.000 I have a question, if someone, if, you know, person A is overweight and people, whether it's strangers or their nearest and dearest, tell them in whatever way, kindness first, we hope that they are unhealthy and that, you know, I love you.
00:16:05.000 You're unhealthy, you need to get into the gym and I'll even come with you.
00:16:09.000 That person cries, but then harms themselves.
00:16:13.000 Maybe unalives themselves.
00:16:14.000 Yeah.
00:16:15.000 A, is that the person or the people who told them to lose weight?
00:16:19.000 Is that their fault?
00:16:20.000 And B, if not, is that just Darwinism?
00:16:23.000 Is that like survival of the fittest?
00:16:25.000 Yeah.
00:16:26.000 Like the weakest just go, because not only are you weak in body, but you're also weak in mind.
00:16:31.000 You're looking at a very minute example.
00:16:33.000 Yeah.
00:16:34.000 Okay.
00:16:35.000 That doesn't happen very often.
00:16:36.000 I wasn't giving an example.
00:16:37.000 No, no, no.
00:16:38.000 If that was a hypothetical, if that was to happen, for example, I've got a fat mate.
00:16:41.000 How many times have we heard this?
00:16:42.000 I've got a fat friend.
00:16:43.000 Okay.
00:16:44.000 I love the fat, but I've got a fat, I've got a fat friend.
00:16:47.000 Shout out to Calca.
00:16:49.000 When he gets overweight, we pull him aside.
00:16:51.000 We don't pull him aside.
00:16:52.000 We actually, our mates as a group together, mate, you're getting pudgy.
00:16:55.000 Time to lose weight.
00:16:56.000 What's the new year's resolution this year?
00:16:58.000 Giving up Maltesers again?
00:16:59.000 Like we're just, we G him up.
00:17:01.000 It's to a point.
00:17:02.000 If he's going to go and harm himself, again, that's not on, that's not on the group of friends
00:17:08.000 that are jovially have banter with him and encouraging him to lose weight.
00:17:12.000 That's just, again, Pearl said society's gone too soft.
00:17:16.000 I think it's the case of that.
00:17:17.000 Wouldn't you, wouldn't you say they're harming themselves either way?
00:17:20.000 Because if you die, have a heart attack at 35, you're going to have the same outcome.
00:17:24.000 I mean, even now there, there's a new, there's like an epidemic of people between the ages
00:17:29.000 of 25 and 30 getting cancer.
00:17:31.000 I think it's obviously obesity causes cancer.
00:17:33.000 I mean, there was a big ad in London for a long time that said obesity causes cancer.
00:17:36.000 A lot of people have a problem with it.
00:17:37.000 I didn't have a problem with it.
00:17:38.000 I mean, I was skinny at the time when it was out.
00:17:40.000 But it's true, obesity causes cancer.
00:17:43.000 No one is denying that, but that doesn't stop me.
00:17:46.000 So one of my tweets I had recently was I tweeted myself in a bikini and I said,
00:17:50.000 stop waiting to lose weight to get in a bikini and just go and enjoy yourself with your friends in the sun.
00:17:55.000 Like just enjoy it.
00:17:56.000 No, no, I think you should wait to get in a bikini.
00:17:58.000 I don't think you should because, and I'll tell you what.
00:18:00.000 I think, I think, I like feeling like my bikini is earned.
00:18:04.000 Yeah, but, Pel, when I was thinner, I was less inclined to wear one because I was more insecure.
00:18:12.000 When I was fatter, I was less likely to wear one too.
00:18:16.000 And I think that's like as the world should be.
00:18:18.000 Does that mean you should never go on holiday, Pel?
00:18:20.000 I think you should show, no, I think, you know, you should be modest in that regard.
00:18:23.000 Yeah, I think you show off things you're proud of.
00:18:25.000 And I don't think you should be proud of being overweight.
00:18:29.000 I have a question.
00:18:30.000 I'm not proud of being overweight, but I wouldn't say that I shouldn't go in a bikini with my friends.
00:18:34.000 Like watch, I should just sit on the sand and read a book while I wait for them.
00:18:37.000 You know, I just want to enjoy my life.
00:18:38.000 No, there's one pieces.
00:18:39.000 I have a question.
00:18:41.000 I mean, I think I look good.
00:18:43.000 You know, check my Instagram, peerblossom underscore X.
00:18:46.000 I think I look good in a bikini.
00:18:47.000 No way.
00:18:48.000 You see earlier on, you said that you're not at that part of your life where you're ready to do anything about it.
00:18:52.000 Like, why is that?
00:18:53.000 What could get you there?
00:18:54.000 No, I feel ready.
00:18:55.000 So I'm working on it at the moment.
00:18:57.000 I just struggle with it.
00:18:58.000 It's just, it's hard for me.
00:18:59.000 Look it.
00:19:00.000 Come over here.
00:19:01.000 I work out five days a week.
00:19:02.000 I will.
00:19:03.000 No, I find it easier having a boyfriend because he supports me.
00:19:06.000 11 a.m.
00:19:07.000 This is every day.
00:19:08.000 You guys should know this, right?
00:19:09.000 What?
00:19:10.000 We're talking about the topic here and the word, using the word fat, but there's also a fat called visceral fat.
00:19:16.000 So there's fat and visceral fat.
00:19:18.000 Do you, are you aware of what visceral fat is?
00:19:21.000 The fat around the heart, no?
00:19:22.000 Exactly.
00:19:23.000 And the arteries.
00:19:24.000 So if you was to find out your visceral fat is at an alarming stage, would you continue to live the life you're living?
00:19:31.000 And this is, this is the thing we should be more aware of.
00:19:34.000 The word, the word weight, I'm not, we shouldn't be using the word weight so much, but yet the other numbers that are way more important.
00:19:46.000 We talk about body fat, muscle mass percentage, water percentage, visceral fat, which is one of the most dangerous fat that you can approach.
00:19:56.000 So if you was to find out where your visceral fat is at and it's at an alarming stage, you would not be sitting here talking about body positivity.
00:20:04.000 You guys get, you guys get those tests done?
00:20:06.000 You would not.
00:20:07.000 So I have like severe asthma, which was caused by COVID.
00:20:11.000 So I've had a lot of health tests done.
00:20:13.000 And in general, I'm pretty healthy, like in terms of my heart and what's going on with me.
00:20:19.000 Like I'm pretty healthy.
00:20:20.000 A lot of that is youth.
00:20:21.000 I think that if I was older and like at the same BMI I'm at, it might be more difficult.
00:20:27.000 Do you know where visceral fat is at?
00:20:29.000 I have no idea, but I'm sure that my doctor does and they didn't have any problem with my, my heart in general.
00:20:34.000 Because I had all those tests done recently because, you know, my asthma like stopped me breathing because I'm allergic to my pet guinea pigs.
00:20:40.000 It's a whole thing.
00:20:41.000 But yeah, I've, I've had all those tests and I'm reasonably healthy.
00:20:44.000 That doesn't mean I could be healthier.
00:20:45.000 And that doesn't mean it won't get harder as I get older.
00:20:47.000 I'm very aware that like, as I reach my thirties and things like that, I'm 26 now.
00:20:51.000 Things will get harder to shift and I'd rather do something about it now.
00:20:55.000 And as I said before, I don't think anybody, I just don't think you can be healthy at your size.
00:21:00.000 I don't think that anybody is kidding themselves by that though.
00:21:04.000 Like, I don't think that anybody my size.
00:21:06.000 Well, you just said that you were healthy.
00:21:09.000 In terms of like what my doctor said and like, I wasn't told.
00:21:12.000 These doctors don't know that.
00:21:13.000 What does that mean?
00:21:14.000 What did you say?
00:21:15.000 I'd prefer to hear from a nutritionist and a doctor.
00:21:18.000 Maybe.
00:21:19.000 Or a second opinion.
00:21:20.000 I don't know much about that.
00:21:21.000 But like, obviously, like, I mean, I have serious asthma.
00:21:24.000 So like I was in hospital and I had a lot of chats and things like that about my general health.
00:21:28.000 Well, and that can be caused by food too.
00:21:30.000 Because I have issues with asthma too.
00:21:31.000 A doctor and a nutritionist will give you two different results.
00:21:33.000 Yeah.
00:21:34.000 I think it's, um, for me, like, I'm not gonna kid myself and be like, I'm at my full health.
00:21:40.000 Yeah.
00:21:41.000 Like, no, I'm very overweight.
00:21:42.000 Like, I'm not joking myself about that.
00:21:43.000 I would like to lose weight.
00:21:44.000 As I said, if I could press a button and be skinny, I would.
00:21:47.000 I just think that's what the body, like, if body positivity was really like body positive, it would be about losing weight.
00:21:53.000 But I just think it's not about losing weight.
00:21:56.000 It's about being content.
00:21:57.000 I think for them it's actually mental positivity because body positivity is about, what, being confident, keeping a sane mind.
00:22:05.000 When you talk about body positivity, all I hear is about mental things like being confident, having a sane mental.
00:22:12.000 Well, he's getting the gist.
00:22:14.000 But what's wrong with that?
00:22:15.000 Mental positivity.
00:22:16.000 You're lying to yourself.
00:22:17.000 That's what I'm saying.
00:22:18.000 You're lying to yourself, basically, yeah.
00:22:19.000 You know, you could call yourself healthy, but, you know, in reality, the reality is you're probably not healthy.
00:22:25.000 You're probably not healthy.
00:22:26.000 Nobody said we're healthy or I'm healthy or we know we have to eat healthy and exercise.
00:22:31.000 She just said that she's healthy.
00:22:32.000 You said that.
00:22:33.000 She said that.
00:22:34.000 What she probably means is, did you mean, did you mean the fact that you ain't got a big illness or diabetes or blood pressure?
00:22:42.000 Would you say, would you say, would you say obesity is unhealthy?
00:22:46.000 Yeah.
00:22:47.000 Yes.
00:22:48.000 I don't know if anyone would disagree with that.
00:22:49.000 And I think to the point around visceral fat and smoking.
00:22:53.000 So now in the UK, at least, if you want to buy a packet of cigarettes or tobacco, you've got loads of images of lungs and what it does.
00:23:01.000 And like all sorts of scary images are supposed to put people off.
00:23:05.000 I wonder if we were to have the same sorts of images around visceral fat.
00:23:09.000 Yeah.
00:23:10.000 Maybe actual people have actual images of obese people, although that could be problematic to some.
00:23:15.000 And on unhealthy food, if that would have a deterrent effect.
00:23:19.000 So it's not showing fat people on chocolates and stuff.
00:23:22.000 Well, I wonder if it would.
00:23:23.000 I mean, if you're showing fat people, like if you've just got an image of a fat person, that's probably quite problematic.
00:23:27.000 Remember the commercials they used to do about smoking where it's like smoking will kill you?
00:23:31.000 Why don't they have that for obesity when 60% of the population is overweight or obese?
00:23:36.000 They should.
00:23:37.000 Why not?
00:23:38.000 We should.
00:23:39.000 Why don't we start a campaign?
00:23:40.000 I think we're the right group of people should do that.
00:23:44.000 You know, I'll produce it myself.
00:23:47.000 One of the key things that we're establishing here, though, is that all three overweight people here are not saying that you shouldn't be healthy.
00:23:52.000 We're not saying that you should be obese.
00:23:54.000 We're all saying, yes, it's bad to obese.
00:23:56.000 Yes, you should get better.
00:23:57.000 Yes.
00:23:58.000 I mean, I'm saying that because of my youth, I don't have high blood pressure.
00:24:00.000 I don't have any of those things wrong with me.
00:24:02.000 Doesn't mean that in 20 years it wouldn't be.
00:24:04.000 But I think I would love to hear that message more from influencers like yourself rather than being content with the way you look rather than talking about wearing a bikini to the beach.
00:24:14.000 At the same time.
00:24:15.000 I think the better solution is what you're doing, which is to be an example of losing weight and being healthy, but actually healthy.
00:24:22.000 At the same time, I don't think that you should wait to enjoy yourself because of your weight.
00:24:26.000 I don't think you should wait to wear a bikini.
00:24:27.000 I don't think you should wait to do any of those things.
00:24:29.000 I don't think you should dislike yourself or not wear the dress you want to wear or not go somewhere you want to go because of your weight or not have pictures.
00:24:35.000 I've met people who won't have that picture taken.
00:24:37.000 No one's saying that, but I do think that when you're obese, that should be your first priority.
00:24:41.000 So I do think maybe instead of wearing a dress and going out on the town, you should go to the gym instead.
00:24:47.000 It comes down to motive.
00:24:50.000 Why are you wearing a bikini?
00:24:51.000 Yeah.
00:24:52.000 Why are you going to the club in a revealing dress?
00:24:54.000 Are you enjoying yourself at the club?
00:24:56.000 Why are you wearing a bikini?
00:24:57.000 Because I wanted to go have fun with my friends.
00:25:00.000 I think I look good.
00:25:01.000 Why does anyone wear a bikini?
00:25:03.000 Would her reasons for wearing a bikini be any different from like a mid-sized or slim person at the beach where you are supposed to wear a bikini?
00:25:14.000 I would say nine out of ten women wear a bikini.
00:25:17.000 One for attention from males.
00:25:19.000 Two to woo another guy probably.
00:25:22.000 Why do they wear revealing dresses at clubs?
00:25:24.000 I would say it's mainly for attention.
00:25:26.000 I mean, they keep, they say it's for themselves, but...
00:25:28.000 I would say it's mainly for attention.
00:25:30.000 I don't say it's like, I wear a bikini because I feel comfortable in a bikini.
00:25:35.000 I wear a bikini because I just want to impress my friends.
00:25:38.000 I'd say nine times out of ten, you're trying to impress another guy or whoever you're attracted to.
00:25:43.000 And what's wrong with a fat woman trying to impress them?
00:25:45.000 And men want to show arms because this is what you want to call.
00:25:47.000 I just think it's unrealistic for them to think that a lot of people are finding them attractive when majority wouldn't.
00:25:54.000 Is that fair to say?
00:25:56.000 I don't know. I'm not the majority. I'm not attracted to women.
00:25:58.000 I didn't wear my bikini to be attractive.
00:26:00.000 I don't speak for all men, but I would say majority of blokes wouldn't find fat women in a bikini attractive.
00:26:06.000 Does it depend on what her shape is like?
00:26:08.000 Can we get a consensus from the guys?
00:26:10.000 Actually, I'm just, there's five guys in the room. Six.
00:26:14.000 So who here would disqualify a girl from dating her just based on her weight?
00:26:19.000 Yeah, 100%.
00:26:20.000 Yeah, 100%.
00:26:21.000 So you wouldn't, you would, so.
00:26:23.000 That and confident. Who's not confident here?
00:26:25.000 King, would you, would you disqualify, would you disqualify a girl based on her weight?
00:26:31.000 Yeah.
00:26:32.000 What is that weight limit? I'd be so interested.
00:26:34.000 Well, Pearl, would you disqualify a guy if he was fat?
00:26:38.000 Yeah.
00:26:40.000 But I have dated a bigger guy before, but yeah.
00:26:44.000 Oh, Pearl!
00:26:46.000 You're so nice.
00:26:47.000 Well, we have it.
00:26:48.000 So that's, that's a hundred percent.
00:26:49.000 We just asked five guys.
00:26:50.000 You famously dated a bigger guy before.
00:26:51.000 That's five out of five.
00:26:52.000 I'll take that.
00:26:53.000 Small sample size.
00:26:54.000 I'm sorry, I'm a number.
00:26:55.000 Statistically significant though.
00:26:56.000 I'm a numbers person, so no matter what, if I'm with you on your numbers, then right.
00:27:00.000 But go for gold.
00:27:01.000 If you enjoy, if you enjoy wearing a bikini, go for gold.
00:27:05.000 That bods are in.
00:27:06.000 I'll just last minute.
00:27:07.000 Yes, they are.
00:27:08.000 They are.
00:27:09.000 We're not talking about weight, are we?
00:27:10.000 So what is the weight limit?
00:27:11.000 Like is it, if a woman is, I don't know, I don't know.
00:27:13.000 It's just aesthetically appealing.
00:27:15.000 It's not a fat woman.
00:27:16.000 It's about shape, right?
00:27:17.000 If she had a tiny waist, she was buxom and she had large thighs and a big bum, you would
00:27:21.000 be like, yeah, she's rocking that.
00:27:22.000 But if she was rounder, like more of an apple shape, then you'd be like, yeah, you need to
00:27:27.000 I'd say there's tears.
00:27:28.000 I'd say there's tears for sure.
00:27:29.000 I mean, if you look at Nicki Minaj, you go, oh yeah.
00:27:31.000 Okay.
00:27:32.000 I could see her in a bikini.
00:27:33.000 Wouldn't mind that.
00:27:34.000 She's probably a bit larger than the average individual, but an obese woman in a bikini,
00:27:38.000 probably not everyone's cup of tea.
00:27:40.000 Would you go up to her and ask her what her, what the fat around her heart is like?
00:27:44.000 I would judge her based on how she looks.
00:27:47.000 If she looks unhealthy, probably disqualifies her.
00:27:50.000 Is that, that's probably fair.
00:27:51.000 How long have you been a personal trainer?
00:27:52.000 Can I ask?
00:27:53.000 Yeah.
00:27:54.000 How long have you been a personal trainer?
00:27:55.000 How long?
00:27:56.000 Yeah.
00:27:57.000 Probably since 2018.
00:27:58.000 Yeah.
00:27:59.000 So three of my latest Instagram posts are me in a bikini, in different bikinis, and they
00:28:04.000 all did absolutely fine.
00:28:05.000 They have lots of comments telling me how great I look.
00:28:07.000 And I think I look great in them, you know, and I'm an obese one.
00:28:10.000 So do your clients trust you?
00:28:11.000 Yeah.
00:28:12.000 Is that an echo chamber?
00:28:13.000 What?
00:28:14.000 Do your clients trust you?
00:28:15.000 Do your clients trust you?
00:28:16.000 I would think they would, yeah.
00:28:17.000 And what's the biggest client you've had, like the biggest weight?
00:28:20.000 I'd say to my mainly train, I would train guys, but just, I would say the average probably
00:28:27.000 like a hundred, 110 kilos.
00:28:29.000 Bloody.
00:28:30.000 I'm sorry that you, you listen, you need to do more personal training because until
00:28:34.000 you make a big person lose weight, you're like a big, big, big person lose weight.
00:28:39.000 Actually there's some.
00:28:40.000 How could you think about it, man?
00:28:41.000 Come on.
00:28:42.000 Yeah.
00:28:43.000 Personal trainer, their job is to help people.
00:28:45.000 But the issue is even when you lose weight, 80% of fat people regain it within five years.
00:28:52.000 So it's like, trainers can only do some money.
00:28:55.000 I'm not here.
00:28:56.000 I don't want to come, but for real, a personal trainer is all about actually helping and encouraging
00:29:02.000 others and you need to actually set an example and be the example.
00:29:05.000 No, but check this.
00:29:06.000 No, wait, wait, wait, wait.
00:29:07.000 But you see with the personal trainers here, how long do you spend with your client?
00:29:12.000 An hour.
00:29:13.000 An hour.
00:29:14.000 An hour of that.
00:29:15.000 So if any more time you want twice a week, three times a week.
00:29:19.000 So then how am I going to control your life or make you lose weight or motivate you?
00:29:23.000 If you're not even taking, committing yourself to losing weight yourself.
00:29:27.000 Personal trainers.
00:29:28.000 And a lot of women just get a personal trainer as a counsellor.
00:29:31.000 There are so many personal trainers that I know.
00:29:34.000 Wait, say that again.
00:29:35.000 I'm saying a lot of women just get personal trainers as a counsellor.
00:29:37.000 They go there, tell them all their problems.
00:29:40.000 They're not really there to lose weight.
00:29:41.000 Wait, wait, really?
00:29:42.000 It's true.
00:29:43.000 It's true.
00:29:44.000 It's true.
00:29:45.000 So, I mean, what he's saying is it's on the individual.
00:29:48.000 You have to have some responsibility.
00:29:50.000 The personal trainer can't babysit you.
00:29:51.000 Hey, what are you eating?
00:29:52.000 Monitoring.
00:29:53.000 They can encourage you all they want.
00:29:54.000 But then how do other personal trainers help other big, big people lose proper weight?
00:29:58.000 I don't know.
00:29:59.000 My friends were really small.
00:30:01.000 I think if there's less of a body positivity movement, like more big, big people lose weight.
00:30:07.000 It's more that more positive attitude needs to be promoted by personal trainers in general.
00:30:12.000 Not him, but in general.
00:30:13.000 Because when you go to a gym, what is it?
00:30:16.000 It's personal trainers that are meant to be saying you're in a gym.
00:30:19.000 Well done.
00:30:20.000 You've made it.
00:30:21.000 You usually sit at home, eating, whatever.
00:30:23.000 You're in the gym.
00:30:24.000 Let me help you.
00:30:25.000 But no, it's the opposite.
00:30:26.000 Those are PTs with structure.
00:30:31.000 Because if I started training you, I already motivated you from the start to start training.
00:30:36.000 And if every, let's just say week or two, you are checking your numbers and every week
00:30:40.000 or two, you're actually getting results from these numbers, that's motivating you to come
00:30:45.000 to the gym more, to be there more, to eat healthier, to do more.
00:30:49.000 It's because you are getting better every single day.
00:30:52.000 It has nothing to do with the PT.
00:30:54.000 It has nothing to do with how much you show up.
00:30:57.000 It's about what you're doing behind my back.
00:30:59.000 It's all up to you.
00:31:01.000 You are your own motivation.
00:31:03.000 And when I show you these numbers, and you see every two weeks or a month that, listen,
00:31:08.000 I dropped four kg in, let's just say one month, that should motivate you to do more.
00:31:14.000 It's all in the numbers.
00:31:15.000 It has nothing to do with mental health and our lifestyle and all this and all that bullshit.
00:31:19.000 No.
00:31:20.000 It's all in your numbers.
00:31:22.000 That's just my opinion.
00:31:24.000 And when I show that to my clients, they're motivated to do more.
00:31:28.000 They're motivated to lose more.
00:31:30.000 It's because they see that they're improving themselves by showing up and doing what they
00:31:34.000 have to do and showing that consistency.
00:31:37.000 That's all that's important, to be honest.
00:31:40.000 You know what?
00:31:41.000 You keep on dropping this word motivation.
00:31:43.000 I hear motivation a lot in this podcast, but a lot of people lose motivation very quickly.
00:31:49.000 And it's what it is.
00:31:50.000 It's actually discipline.
00:31:51.000 Discipline to get you to your goals.
00:31:53.000 A lot of people are not disciplined.
00:31:55.000 A lot of people are not consistent in their goals either.
00:31:57.000 A lot of people are consistently doing nonsense.
00:32:00.000 So, it's the start.
00:32:01.000 As many of you know, I was just banned on TikTok.
00:32:05.000 And we are demonetized on a daily basis on this platform.
00:32:09.000 If you want to help, please consider sending a super thanks below.
00:32:13.000 Every donation helps and it helps make what we do possible.