JustPearlyThings - April 19, 2023


Trans Woman Tries To Corner @JWALLER


Episode Stats


Length

16 minutes

Words per minute

210.12437

Word count

3,531

Sentence count

1

Harmful content

Misogyny

19

sentences flagged

Hate speech

13

sentences flagged


Summary

Summaries generated with gmurro/bart-large-finetuned-filtered-spotify-podcast-summ .

In this episode, we discuss what it means to be a good woman and how to deal with being taken advantage of by men. We also discuss the difference between selflessness and being selfless in relationships and the differences between the two.

Transcript

Transcript generated with Whisper (turbo).
Misogyny classifications generated with MilaNLProc/bert-base-uncased-ear-misogyny .
Hate speech classifications generated with facebook/roberta-hate-speech-dynabench-r4-target .
00:00:00.000 i feel like eventually i feel like a good woman goes through so much before she actually gets
00:00:06.800 the goods like you go through so many men while like you're giving your all you're giving your
00:00:11.700 no no good women good women good women get picked quick i mean like they might take one 1.00
00:00:16.980 come on they might take one or two l's yeah like they might i'm not talking about five six l's
00:00:22.880 but not usually like there's a girl i knew in college and she was she was honestly cute like 0.99
00:00:28.640 she wasn't like stunning but like she was cute right but men were just like she got the right 0.99
00:00:32.900 morals it wasn't even she no she was just really feminine yeah um and she was a christian and like
00:00:38.780 men were lined up to date her because of the way she made them feel she never had an issue with men 1.00
00:00:42.700 taking advantage of her she never had an issue with men you know um being in situationships like
00:00:48.200 she got the relationship easy because she was kind she was loving and she was selfless yeah but like
00:00:53.480 the women that always complain about being taken advantage of usually they're not doing something 1.00
00:00:57.080 not selfless i feel like selflessness is a big thing they're counting but it's also it's also the
00:01:02.040 right values you've also got to know how to pick the right men and right now social media has a lot
00:01:06.280 of women confused thinking that they need the guy with the most amount of likes who wears the latest
00:01:10.480 trainers who has the biggest chain and you're passing over decent guys and so that's that's why i'm
00:01:16.300 saying again you're being misled because your youth and your beauty right now your intellect right now
00:01:20.260 you're at your peak this is this is when you should really be gunning for that guy this is the time
00:01:24.920 these girls these older women are saying oh yeah chill you know it's a journey you know look at the 0.88
00:01:29.580 woman who are telling you that and tell me if they're successful women in happy relationships 1.00
00:01:33.420 that's all i'm saying but i feel like like adding on to what you're saying it's about also the
00:01:38.500 generation we're in today i feel like that makes a big difference like times of females our age for
00:01:44.420 example they might say self-love because life is different i feel like do you guys i'm sorry go
00:01:52.320 ahead but it's not it's not the generation we're in today it's the choices that women make today 0.99
00:01:57.160 yeah it's not it's not the generation society doesn't make you do things you pick what percent
00:02:01.980 of women are virgins on their wedding night that's a choice what would you say like you you mentioned
00:02:07.000 something just a second ago when you were like oh um before it gets to the point where like women get 1.00
00:02:11.760 taken taken for granted what's the point where you can give be so selfless and you can keep giving
00:02:16.960 and giving and giving giving where's that fine line between giving so much and then just being
00:02:21.980 absolutely walked over yeah literally what do you have to what what what what changes what's the
00:02:27.520 stopping point do you know for you like your personal opinion um i i think that people that are
00:02:36.280 genuinely selfless aren't asking what they get in return and they tend to get more and they don't tend
00:02:41.180 to pick men that treat them like shit not and and even even the men that are a little bit more of
00:02:47.000 assholes they they they usually act right for those girls or like do more for those girls because like 0.92
00:02:53.480 oh by a landslide yeah they'll do more for that girl there's a difference between this and um selfless
00:02:58.700 there's a good line i would if a man wants to act right he's gonna act right if he's not acting
00:03:04.440 right but but we go but we go like women we always blame the men instead of ourselves like like the 0.87
00:03:10.360 question is if the men aren't treating you right what are you doing like what are you doing and it's
00:03:14.960 the same way when men when men the women aren't treating them right they have to say okay what am i
00:03:18.560 doing wrong alex had to read how many books five books on women and study text game to get the 0.99
00:03:24.980 results we wanted but it's like when women we're not getting the relationship or we're not getting 1.00
00:03:29.040 men to treat us right we say oh well to you well just automatically blame yeah but maybe maybe it's
00:03:33.880 something you're not doing yeah of course i agree sorry did you no i was just gonna say you know you
00:03:39.480 guys are talking about going on a journey i just want to be very clear with you you are at the top
00:03:43.120 of your sexual marketplace value right now at that age a woman at 21 22 23 you are at the top of your 0.84
00:03:49.620 value so if you're really looking at it like a marketplace like troy says i'd sell but your top
00:03:56.640 of market sell you know and that should be the goal um is to sell when you're when you're at top
00:04:02.120 obviously i will never be able to sit here and tell you young ladies what it's going to take for you 0.98
00:04:07.240 to be happy that's not for me to tell you i would tell you that finding a strong man that you can look
00:04:12.060 up to and admire and want to get behind is likely your best bet and at a younger age and older age
00:04:17.380 and that's all just going off that what you just said sorry um i just have a bit of like a just like
00:04:23.280 confusion in my brain because obviously you said i'm not going to sit and tell you like how much
00:04:27.540 like what you should do to be happy but you i personally think you are quite disrespectful to
00:04:33.100 like regina about like what she does to who she said that she loves her work and she loves her job
00:04:38.320 and i'm yeah she said she likes taking dick for money yes i i don't okay you don't have to say 0.70
00:04:42.820 that but that's exactly what she that's exactly what she said but like you don't know her personally
00:04:47.560 you don't know her circumstances like i just think that was really disrespectful what does that have
00:04:52.000 to do with what i just said though no but like you said oh i'm not going to sit here and tell you
00:04:55.680 what you should do to be happy but she said that she was completely fine and
00:04:59.240 can i ask you a question um when did you start doing sex work um i started doing it like back
00:05:09.440 in lockdown okay so like what two years ago um three is it three now yeah time flies right
00:05:16.100 um do you do you regret that are you happy with that decision i'm happy okay how do you know that
00:05:24.100 you're happy i'm so sorry that to ask about how do you like what is it that makes you know that
00:05:28.220 because even though like at the end of the day i'm like oh yeah i'm doing these and these and these
00:05:32.760 like uh oh people should think i am a slap if i don't have any regret why would i have to be unhappy
00:05:40.640 has it has it affected your dating life at all has it made it harder to date
00:05:44.460 yes or no yes and no i mean like um i always find myself like
00:05:53.540 i never really wanted to have a relationship and i always end up into relationships like
00:06:01.780 without me wanting to and um as well like because in my world it's really it's really
00:06:08.580 difficult today and i'm not talking about like the being an escort world because um i am a trans
00:06:14.600 woman as well at the same time boom told you told you no but i didn't say it wasn't true i just said
00:06:20.660 he didn't have to say tranny well she was attacking me she was attacking me i just said what did you 0.95
00:06:25.560 say no she she keeps coming at me and like here's the thing i'm not coming if you're happy i can't
00:06:31.060 sit here and tell you either if you're happy you're happy yeah but like for example like i agreed with a
00:06:36.420 lot of things you've done you've said right and i'm honest but like uh now in front of people and
00:06:42.220 stuff like that i don't accept you you're calling me tranny yeah that's right well no like we were
00:06:47.100 getting after it and that's fine but i i didn't call all i'm simply saying because i didn't call
00:06:51.700 you i can't i did did i feel free but what i'm saying to you i will never do it i will never do
00:06:59.520 it because i respect you as a person at the same time i respect you as a person you didn't see what
00:07:04.440 coming no i just didn't i didn't no and so what and i'd like well first of all if i've offended you
00:07:11.500 i'm sorry yeah no i feel offended and so do i so do i because you asked me a bunch of shit to piss 0.92
00:07:16.380 me off and whatever but what i'm what i'm saying to these ladies is completely different than your
00:07:20.920 situation why why why tell me because they're substantially younger and they're not in the
00:07:26.940 same business they're not going to be in the same business and they want a different probably want a
00:07:31.440 different situation in their life well that's why that's why i'm not imposing myself onto them
00:07:35.680 am i and that's fair but to answer your question i said something to them she diverted
00:07:41.240 to you instead of going with what we were actually talking about going to what you said though you said
00:07:48.060 about the journey i feel like we are quite me personally i've always wanted to get married from
00:07:53.560 a younger age not like i didn't want to be 21 and not married yeah me too literally but i feel like
00:07:59.220 i don't know maybe journey for you is different but for me i want to i'm not saying i want to go all
00:08:05.160 the way to 35 and still be single it's more about me knowing that i'm ready to be a wife because i
00:08:11.000 my mom my mom is a married woman my father and their relationship is good i would like i look for
00:08:18.680 that but i'm not going to rush into that and just think oh i'm 21 i need to get married and i completely
00:08:23.240 agree with you so that's what i think i'm just talking to you yeah and that's fine color journey
00:08:27.220 whatever i'm just simply saying that you're very much more likely to find yourself in a happy place
00:08:33.540 if you don't go sleep with like tons and tons and tons of men and that you don't wait until
00:08:39.620 you know you're past your 30s in order to get married that's all i'm saying no no i agree with
00:08:44.740 i'm not saying it from a place to try to like like be disrespectful to you guys i'm just simply saying
00:08:50.380 is very likely that that's the case it's just double standard yeah it's yeah life is a complete
00:08:55.420 double standard double standards are real i agree to them to a certain extent i'm not going to sit here
00:09:01.320 and just say like listen to oh yeah man can cheat man can do this man could do that cool if you want
00:09:07.140 to cheat if you want to do that then you can go do that in your own but my man and that's completely
00:09:12.460 okay do that so i know we're talking about the large majority so that's what i'm talking about
00:09:17.240 in my personal opinion i don't want no man that cheats i don't want no sneaky man i want an honest
00:09:23.260 man because if i agree if i decide as my personal choice that i have a man that's my husband and
00:09:30.280 he's sleeping with someone else and i accept that for myself and he can do that on the side
00:09:35.680 then that's my personal issue that's literally to do with me and my boyfriend but i don't want to
00:09:41.000 agree with you i don't do as you wish no of course if a woman accepts that and they want that in their
00:09:45.200 life like i know a woman or a girl that she's with a boy he constantly cheats on her he tells her
00:09:52.520 life oh this is what's happening i'm cheating on you i'm with these other women and she accepts it 0.99
00:09:57.940 so at the end of the day she can't sit and chat shit or anything about it because she accepts that 0.61
00:10:04.560 lifestyle i think it's absolutely fine for you to have whatever aspirations you want you want you
00:10:09.260 want to have for your for your life it's just that it's just that you've also got to recognize
00:10:13.180 the the work the reality the working of the wider world like being a realistic person and living in
00:10:20.500 delusion because you're looking for you're you're sort of looking for a bit of a unicorn in a way
00:10:24.660 aren't you if you're looking a unicorn you're looking for a i assume a very high value guy
00:10:29.880 yeah but also at the end of the day but you also never like cap it because imagine like i meet
00:10:36.680 someone in two days i completely fall in love with them yeah and i'm okay with them doing that
00:10:40.700 you can never put a cap to anything but at the end of the day my morals right now that's what you
00:10:45.260 want i don't want no man that cheats on me i don't want no man that talks to any other girl so so to
00:10:50.640 clarify your your answer to the question is that yes she should leave i would leave personally but at
00:10:57.880 the end of the day you can't really cap it at anything because imagine you're completely in love
00:11:01.740 of the man exactly what about what about you yeah i agree with you like right now you're saying
00:11:07.860 you're leaving yeah but when you're actually in the situation like it's complete different to what
00:11:12.480 you want and your aspiration okay leave or stay give me one i would say leave leave leave or stay
00:11:19.720 what about you leave or stay um depending on the situation staying depending on the situation okay i need
00:11:25.700 we'll respect that okay so sort of stay sort of if i knew it's a girl they're getting it they're
00:11:33.880 getting it slowly the compromise okay okay so she might stay but it's not something that you want
00:11:39.860 yeah you don't want it of course of course and you leave or stay uh i'm a triny i have no right 0.64
00:11:45.620 okay fine um so okay so so question i want to know does it does it switch if you have children your
00:11:54.840 answer yeah i think when you have children it's way different a lot of people stay in relationships
00:12:00.120 sometimes because of their kids but then some people on the other hand they'll think we can
00:12:04.820 both look after the kids just not while we're together because if you can go and cheat on me
00:12:09.200 no i'm asking you so not not with someone else like me personally all right all right who's who's
00:12:15.420 staying if there's kids raise your hand i'm not staying just for the kids i'll be raw
00:12:20.060 okay so you are you are not raised to be a wife if you're going to put yourself before your kids 0.99
00:12:25.740 i can't lie it depends on the situation no you just it depends on the situation how
00:12:31.480 how am i going to have a conversation if i can't believe the words that you say
00:12:35.300 no you can ask me questions it just depends it really depends on the situation so this is the
00:12:39.020 situation go on tell me your situation the footballer the footballer footballer he cheats
00:12:45.580 he pays for everything
00:12:48.660 you got you got you got two two two little rascals running around i'm not gonna lie
00:12:56.620 at the end of the day that's what any girl would stay not any girl no no damn near not any damn near 0.98
00:13:03.080 any girl would stay but i didn't say my personal beliefs either one yeah my personal beliefs i would
00:13:08.500 say no okay so you would leave so that that goes to my question how are you raised to be a wife 1.00
00:13:12.920 it's nothing to do with it really it really is i don't believe it is do you believe you're a
00:13:17.680 traditional wife to a certain extent i was raised on those beliefs but like i feel like because i
00:13:24.460 grew up in a western world in london it's slightly changed so it's it's traditional i don't feel like
00:13:30.300 i'm entirely modern but that mindset is modern because traditional societies um basically i'm trying
00:13:37.840 to find the definition what's the difference between traditional and modern um traditional
00:13:42.980 society is characterized by um community ownership um where modern is individual
00:13:49.380 so traditional is the family first modern is me first like that's the difference a traditional
00:13:57.600 i was i was raised on always putting my family first so i can never say if i was in that position
00:14:01.640 no no then maybe i will stay with my gosh but i don't feel like i'm begging you straight answer
00:14:06.840 please i don't feel like i would personally okay maybe if i was putting this no no so this is the
00:14:11.520 hypothetical situation you said you'd leave before yeah okay if it's a cheating thing then okay but
00:14:17.340 that's what i'm saying maybe it's self-respect before that it's not self-respect being raised as a
00:14:22.340 wife i feel like that also comes with not being cheated on so that's why that's that's why i feel like
00:14:27.880 wrong but the thing is you don't really you don't marry into it if you don't feel like
00:14:33.020 her grandma or what do you say grandpa grandmother had a whole family across town like i mean the same
00:14:41.140 how many of our grandmothers and great-grandmothers and great-great-grandmothers show up to their
00:14:47.460 husband's funeral and meet their family what i mean 8 000 8 000 years ago 17 men reproduced for every
00:14:55.060 or 17 women reproduced for every one man i'm really intrigued if you're in like a married
00:15:00.160 household like more times the parents are not going to want to show you if they're like cheating
00:15:04.700 because they want you to have like a good image of marriage and they want to be the role models
00:15:08.540 so they're not going to show you the ins and outs of their relationship and like what goes back or
00:15:13.020 they want you to have this um this is what a relationship looks like so i feel like when kids are
00:15:19.340 involved like and he's doing everything that he's meant to do as a man he's providing he's protecting
00:15:24.880 he's being a father to the children he's got time for me we're going on like we're doing stuff as a
00:15:30.040 family we're actually a family unit i feel like yeah i probably would stay because it's like it's not
00:15:35.100 like it's coming out of our marriage or it's like he's stepping out of his role that's when you know i
00:15:41.440 feel like i would leave because it's like what i'm actually with you for i'm being a wife you're not
00:15:44.820 being a husband okay that's that's a good development i think i think in traditional
00:15:48.420 societies when you look at relationships say in nigeria in the village when a marriage is people
00:15:52.920 having married problems they don't come out to the woman and say how do you feel every day is he okay
00:15:58.140 is he treat you well they normally say is he is he making money are you fed do you have a house is he
00:16:02.620 doing his freaking job i've noticed in the west it's kind of how you feel it's like you know in
00:16:07.440 certain situations that i think yeah be be cautious of that that it's a man has a role to protect to
00:16:13.620 provide to be a certain kind of pillar don't mix that up with you know an egotistical battle to be
00:16:19.360 the girl who kind of you know the it girl who doesn't get cheated on who gets everything she wants 0.84
00:16:23.980 who gets the millionaire footballer and and the monogamy and the nice bags and the constant
00:16:29.040 attention and feels good every day all the time and i'm not even saying i was just banned on tiktok
00:16:35.480 and we are demonetized on a daily basis on this platform if you want to help please consider
00:16:42.100 sending a super thanks below every donation helps and it helps make what we do possible