Why Modern Women Lack Feminine Values
Episode Stats
Words per Minute
208.8798
Summary
In this episode, we discuss the role of women in society and how they have been taught to cater to their male counterparts. We also discuss how women have become masculine because of trauma and the consequences of history. In this episode we talk about the benefits of being raised to cater for your male counterpart and why it s a privilege to be a woman.
Transcript
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in the country because there was war going on world wars so women had to pick up go to work
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and do their thing cool from the aftermath of war there's women that are already in the workplace
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and then there's women that also left widowed which means that they now have a choice either
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you starve at home with your family and become and stay a housewife or you're gonna get up and
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you're gonna go to work and that's how a lot of women have become what they call masculine because
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they come out of a trauma they come out also the consequences of history and this is why at this
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point and what i've been trying to say for time is let's stop trying to blame women for what's going
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on in society right now let's understand that this is a construct and a consequence of history
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and let's start let's start respecting because we cannot go back and and i i agree with you i'm not
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i'm not saying it's one gender or the other i'm just saying like we have been talking about the men
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forever it's like we like they i don't want no scrub scrub like there's there's no there's no there's
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no song saying i don't want no whale the whale is like nobody's saying that no one and i'm saying
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like we they have had like we have had decades where we talk it's like now the men are finally
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talking and we can't even give them their fair that's kind of true because even men when they
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were singing about women they sang a lot about love songs it was nice i feel like from the moment you're
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born i don't know if it's just in an african home in an african home you're literally raised to cater
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for your man from that's good because i was so i was eight so my mom was like you need to know how
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you were for your man you were you need to know look good for your man you should be thankful you
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were naturally taught game a lot of girls didn't get taught that they didn't get that yeah like a lot
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of a lot of women would like even i mean my parents just started dating my parents my parents started
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dating when they were 17 my mom taught me no game she's like meet your husband in high school
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a lot of women aren't taught the basic necessities of being a woman like cooking this is shocking to
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me yeah so it's a privilege like you you have something in your holster in your bag that you
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can whip out whenever you need to for a man like okay i can cook for him i can clean for him because
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you have it on you a lot of women had to learn that on their on their own or just had to go
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throughout life and learning it they they never were taught it or they never needed to have it
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until they were in a position where like oh i i can't do this on my own i can't cook i can't clean
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i can't work a simple vacuum i can't do this because things have been done for me my whole life
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or i was never taught that and so you shouldn't look at it as it like oh i was taught this from jump
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i was taught how to cater to my man or be a woman you should take them and like african women like women
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like me nigerian background especially that's all we know it's about even like now i'm 26 my mom
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tells me if i'm 30 without a husband i am basically you okay okay but you you at least so
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so if you look at dating app data she's right she's absolutely right so so so if you look at dating
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app data that's when the numbers change where like women typically have more like leverage on dating
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apps than than men until 30 and then men typically do i i can't remember it some girl was going over the
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study but but and so like she was being honest and if anything you should be thankful for how
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well they prepped you for the world because a lot of girls hit 30 and have no idea not like this is
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a privilege a lot of girls don't have a dad or a mom to like tell them these things and even me like
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my mom didn't know about dating or the dating landscape and yeah and it's like so you at least
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know this at 26 where you can still make choices that that would get you in a better position at 30
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where other girls are gonna hit 30 completely blind and screwed oh but you know what i although today
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i'm not in your side i will agree with her and the only thing i will do is say slightly different
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i will say like for example for me like i mentioned my dad passed away when i was 12 but i grew up seeing
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my mom catered to my dad so i learned a lot from him but then after he was gone what my mom did is
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teach me these survival skills that you need anyways to be able to make it through the world
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so i believe that even things like cooking sewing this this that that's all type of kind of like
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self-care and once you learn to take care of yourself you'll be able to learn to take care of
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someone else but the fact that a lot of the time a lot of women also have the ability to take
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accountability means you're not taking care of yourself because you don't even know what you're
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doing wrong so you can't even be better so when you go into a relationship you land yourself in
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trouble that's what it is what you should be able to do for yourself or you can do for others if not
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then there's no point in you trying to say oh but you know i'm a woman and why am i going to do this
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for man do it for yourself how can you not cook what's going to happen if you can't cook what about
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the fact that as a woman you're going to be the mother and as i mentioned earlier as the mother as
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the woman you're going to be more nurturing so these basic life skills forget about even for a
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man do it for you and for the fact that one day you may want to be a mother then everything falls
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into place if that makes it an easier pill to swallow i do have a question i agree with that i
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do have a question um from your perspective britney how was it for you um correct me if i'm wrong you
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grew up with just your mother um so i was raised by my mom till about like nine and then my grandma
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kind of took over so when i was growing up i thought my mom just didn't want to be around but my grandma
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was really controlling it was basically like i'm the mom now so like she kicked my mom out and my
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grandma was my caretaker my grandma and grandpa so i was raised to my grandparents the uh half the
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other half of my life okay how how was that for you in terms of just learning how to be a woman
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whenever you reached that point i felt like a lot of their um ideas were just really outdated i felt
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like they were really strict and it was smothering so even just going to a simple party or going to a
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friend's house like as an adult do i see why maybe parents aren't so quick to let you go over to
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someone's house yes but it was to a place where you couldn't even explore um i didn't really learn
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too much from my grandma about being a wife or um how to be in a relationship because i always felt
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like they just tolerated each other i never really saw the love like the bond um i've never really seen
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that it's just always something i've known to be true but i've never seen anybody do it yeah so i felt
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like my grandma was trying to get me to cook and do little stuff like that but it just was never
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something and i like i really took an interest in i'm like i i genuinely never felt like i belonged in
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the kitchen like and that's where too i resented how like my thought process a lot growing up because
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i'm like why can't i just be a little bit more simple a little bit more obedient maybe more agreeable
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not have such a strong opinion not be so introspective um that's just where i'm just different so i feel
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like my grandma tried to teach me how to cook but as far as catering to a man no i learned everything
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on the fly and that's where um i think sometimes maybe i get a little frustrated with the internet's
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perspective because i'm like you don't even know what i've had to go through to even be able to speak
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with this awareness like i've had to bump my head so many times to just be able to sit and sit in my car
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and tell you give you a sermon you know so i just never felt like i really was prepared to be a wife
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ever genuinely and you're not alone i think a lot of girls feel like that like i mean how many i don't
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think the stuff that we talk about on these podcasts would be so shocking if women weren't
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lied to for 50 years yeah and i think it's like even talking to andrew today like wasn't it helpful
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like when he was talking about stuff i was even me and i listened to the stuff all the time i was
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like oh i never thought of that like he was talking about how to get a guy to stop playing
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video games i was like i wish i knew this i was like wow yeah that's actually a good one
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why don't you think about it as many of you know i was just banned on tick tock and we are demonetized
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