JustPearlyThings - Woman Admits to Dating a BETA

00:00:00.000 what do you guys think a husband is for um i would say a provider

00:00:07.160 um um i would say also man of the house um as i said before companion to be your best friend

00:00:18.300 um also to honestly to push you to be that better person that is so important um and a good father

00:00:27.180 i feel like a lot of no offense a lot of a lot of men haven't been taught what a good father is

00:00:35.660 because they didn't have that experience and that's unfortunate and that's just being passed

00:00:40.800 down to the next generation to the next generation to the next generation and that's that's something 0.98

00:00:45.320 that i think is really important someone that is a good father has good morals okay uh what do you

00:00:51.540 think um i think he's a protector definitely someone who is i don't want to say like shield

00:01:04.420 me from the world but someone who is gonna have my back um make sure that i'm safe at all times um

00:01:14.360 emotionally like mentally financially um and someone that i can just do life with like

00:01:24.100 my life partner someone that can be by my side and face these challenges that we face in life

00:01:30.560 together okay what do you think what's a husband for i think

00:01:35.820 i don't know to be honest i don't know you don't know no it's an honest answer i don't know

00:01:46.800 honestly i i don't know but you are you're from romania though which is quite yeah still quite um

00:01:54.440 what's the word sorry traditional it is does that not have an effect on how you think about about

00:02:00.480 not really okay not really but um i think we should be friends first of all we should get support for

00:02:10.780 each other we should be equal i think that's important you think men and women can be equal

00:02:17.500 there's an intruder coming into the house are you guys equally gonna fight him no yes

00:02:24.700 i'm gonna run and call the police you deal with him so no so no okay

00:02:39.880 anything else or no you just said you don't know no okay but you want it to be equal so when you say

00:02:48.100 equal do you mean equal sex because a lot of girls say that and i'm like i don't really know what they

00:02:51.600 mean by that like they want a partner equal i think it's about support and how you understand

00:03:01.040 each other and when someone have a bad day you just have to be there for them and push them up

00:03:07.980 don't push them down i think that's important but what does that have to do with being equal

00:03:14.960 i mean like i know we shouldn't push each other down but what is that

00:03:22.560 i don't know you mean like your views are equal kind of thing yeah like he respects you you respect

00:03:30.340 him like the discipline between us like all the respect he shouldn't tell you what to do and you

00:03:36.480 don't tell him what to do kind of thing you just mutually agree we should yeah we should have a

00:03:42.160 conversation about everything and just agree yeah but what about when you disagree what happens

00:03:48.580 we will find a way then are you gonna listen if he says yeah of course if i'm wrong i'm gonna i'm

00:03:54.820 gonna say i'm wrong if i'm wrong i'm wrong yeah but then so then you wouldn't be equal right

00:03:59.320 if if if you guys disagree and then you have to trust him to make a decision

00:04:03.820 i think she just means that she doesn't want to like a dictatorship type of relationship

00:04:13.100 where he listens to her yeah we need to agree we need to have the conversation we need to

00:04:19.640 talk about our problems see i don't i don't think you realize how this sounds to men

00:04:24.800 and i i used to say something similar so i'm not judging you but when you're like oh we need to talk

00:04:29.520 about our problems and talk about every issue and like until we don't really want to talk that's

00:04:34.480 no they just want they don't want to like men just want they just want a girl to listen yeah okay

00:04:38.660 we're gonna do this and then she says but why do we do it why but why like men hate that but why

00:04:44.080 it's like a trick like they hate it yeah that's true yeah you're right but i was just curious um

00:04:50.740 how you expected that to go because when girls say equal i don't know if they'd actually 1.00

00:04:55.800 want a guy because when i hear equal it's it just sounds like girls want a guy that 0.99

00:05:01.460 like follows what they want i feel like it works more like an equilibrium rather than equalness

00:05:07.420 there's more of a wave kind of goes back and forth yeah i think equality maybe is the wrong

00:05:13.280 termed reason more of an equilibrium is right and because it goes back and forth and it's never a

00:05:19.320 straight line to have equalness is where you will have problems to say that you're equal isn't right

00:05:26.000 because you won't work as a relationship if you're both equal because nothing's ever going to get

00:05:32.780 resolved maybe the equal is not the right word but yeah yeah that's what i meant i'm curious just show

00:05:37.300 of hands and then i'll go to you i'm just curious who here would submit to their husband's authority 0.98

00:05:44.000 i will you would okay so it wouldn't be equal then yeah but he'd be above you no yeah just to submit

00:05:53.220 you you do need to be willing to back down and not be equal anymore okay so so you say you would

00:06:01.260 though you would submit well i don't know it's a tricky one maybe not okay no i would you would

00:06:09.280 okay is that what you do now in your relationship he makes all the decisions

00:06:13.140 um no is that just gonna change when you guys get married or what

00:06:20.800 if he's a provider yes so if he he pays all the bills you're gonna he can decide everything he's

00:06:29.380 my boss okay uh what about you you said you would uh to some extent yeah what do you mean um i don't

00:06:37.400 know like oh it feels tricky yeah i'd say to some extent well i think either way women like well 1.00

00:06:48.940 anyway it's about me so um if i was a wife i'd i like the leadership role on his end okay you know

00:06:59.400 but when it comes to i think equality is the wrong word but decision making i'd like to be part of it

00:07:07.740 or um he respects me enough to be like oh babe you know and discuss about certain things but i would

00:07:16.140 respect his word for things um but i think i think just being on a general level that we respect each

00:07:26.560 other on certain things or most things just to keep it leveled and to make it work then it's like

00:07:34.860 oh no i've got this power over you or it's like me arguing back you know that makes sense um but

00:07:41.460 answering your question at the start um i like a partner in crime and a best friend i think everyone

00:07:48.640 thrives um to get that do you think that's normal in history that men and women were best friends

00:07:56.820 i think man was the question no the man was just the head oh yeah the head of the family oh yeah

00:08:06.180 why when do you think that's switched probably with this generation i don't know was it like the 1970s

00:08:14.820 or something do you think that has good outcomes being best friends with your husband

00:08:19.060 who said yes yeah yeah who who said yes you did you did then why are we more divorced than ever

00:08:30.260 before but maybe that's where my point comes in of not wanting to get married so if you're really

00:08:36.120 gonna want to get married i'm like you have to be friends with them whether you like it or not look

00:08:40.540 this is the right crowd to be talking this channel well she makes it you make a very good point because

00:08:47.720 because where all of this is going is kind of what i was trying to say to articulate at the beginning

00:08:51.620 which is that is the marriage certificate fit for purpose anymore given we've got all these dynamics

00:08:56.200 going on in society given there's all these divergent wants and needs and people trying to wiggle out

00:09:00.660 you know not wanting to be submit or whatever does it actually work anymore i'm not convinced that it

00:09:05.440 does work anymore i think the reason it works for you know for better or worse and there's arguments

00:09:09.360 in both cases but the reason it worked before was because society and religion kept it in place

00:09:15.780 and there were certain expectations for what you did and now those expectations aren't there so

00:09:20.020 everyone goes and says the lines that pearl read out in the church but nobody really means it and

00:09:24.300 then 10 years later they're just like oh so bad you know and that is not a good basis for for

00:09:29.260 marriage so do we need something else or do we i mean you know there's a personal choice here as

00:09:33.060 well i haven't chosen to get married up to this point largely because of this stuff you know to be

00:09:38.240 honest um or maybe you just haven't met the right woman well that yeah i mean it makes you want to

00:09:43.620 get married no i mean look i mean i wouldn't i never rule anything out entirely but like i said

00:09:48.260 i'm not i'm not champing at the bit oh my god i really want to get married i really want to sign

00:09:52.040 up to this contract where i can get half of my stuff taken away on a whim i mean it's just not

00:09:55.360 do you know what i mean like i'm happy um being in sort of long-term relationships or

00:10:00.320 or more casual relationship whatever but marriage i mean i mean would you sign a contract where you only

00:10:05.660 have a 10 chance of getting your kids if he takes them and he can take half your stuff

00:10:12.540 and the house and you'd have to move out would you sign it and you only get one and a half meals a day

00:10:21.000 i think if if their value was very high in my life then i would take that risk i'm a risk taker

00:10:34.200 anyway and i feel like if i'm gonna get something out of that which is what i really want and which

00:10:39.220 is what i've always wanted in life which is love and to be loved i'll take that risk

00:10:44.360 because that's the purpose of life to be loved everybody here is searching to be loved to be

00:10:51.340 wanted and to be appreciated by someone that is what everyone wants no sorry but i think everybody

00:10:58.680 is searching for that like everybody in the end just wants to be loved and find that person who

00:11:04.100 accepts them for who they are but why would you need marriage for that yeah yeah um you can still be

00:11:10.600 in your own well for me it's like i don't know it's like religion and things like that like

00:11:15.060 that's something another thing is you say except for for who they are but what if it's the guy who 0.87

00:11:20.380 you are is somebody who wants to sleep around every couple of weeks you know and sort of have sex with 0.95

00:11:24.900 the barista or the girl who's working the nightclub do you know what i mean because and this is a whole 0.99

00:11:28.380 other area because obviously male sexuality is is you know by and large you know they like pearl said i 0.96

00:11:34.560 think earlier you know they want to have sex with as many people as possible women have a slightly 1.00

00:11:38.720 different sort of agenda for the most part um and then you get into this whole area where

00:11:43.640 and i've seen other you know other podcasts where they talk about this but like um

00:11:47.700 you know a guy can really truly love a woman and still go and have sex with somebody else

00:11:54.540 and that's purely by that's purely physical yeah and it doesn't detract from his love from the woman

00:11:58.980 but but for many women you would say well well tell me tell me about you honestly what is it what is

00:12:03.180 your your makeup it's like well i like shagging around i mean a lot of women are not going to accept that 0.58

00:12:08.100 you know what i mean so but they but that's not that's not like that's not like by force that's

00:12:14.180 just like a preference for a man there there are men who can actually be uh loyal like they can

00:12:20.320 they can but come on it's not it's not like something that's wrong with them or it's like

00:12:25.140 this is who they are like if most men were in tiger woods position come on like

00:12:31.020 that's like me saying well i want a hermes back you know well she said you studied zoology didn't

00:12:37.720 you have you got any input on this i mean do you think the males generally they look you know they

00:12:41.120 want to get their end away or i mean men naturally in like if you look at the other primates that 0.92

00:12:50.220 exist so we are a primate um sorry to anyone that doesn't believe in evolution but we are a primate

00:12:56.560 and other male primates like chimpanzees will meet with several females and it's the biological makeup

00:13:04.060 is to breed are they monogamous no and and i don't from looking back in the evolution of hominins

00:13:14.680 which is what we are we're a hominin they weren't monogamous and it's not necessarily the way we're

00:13:22.220 made up it's society that's done that so for you to say that someone should always be with the same

00:13:27.940 person for the rest of them like their lives oh if that's not what they want then so be it

00:13:34.220 don't judge someone because that's what they say but you know on the other side of it you're right

00:13:38.580 you're again to counter what i've just said you are right because if the guy is also signing up for

00:13:43.760 that marriage contract then he should also abide by that contract do you know what i mean so but then

00:13:49.220 it comes back to my question which is well is it in the guys is it in my best interest to sign up

00:13:53.880 for it then you know i do i hear your point i really do and i do hear your point like why would

00:13:58.920 a man want to sign up for that paper um and i i really feel like it just comes down to the individual

00:14:05.120 and and and what they believe in and i feel like yeah it is it is to do with religion definitely i

00:14:12.420 honestly think if most men knew what they were signing i don't think most men would do it

00:14:16.460 and i think if you took religion out of it as well it's a lot of i know like a lot of muslim men

00:14:21.560 you know doing they wouldn't get married during this documentary i just i can't even believe like 0.98

00:14:26.400 the stories i've heard so they're crazy they're crazy like guys get screwed over especially i think 0.52

00:14:31.440 it's worse here than the u.s really that's shocking it depends on the state states yeah yeah but i don't

00:14:39.280 i don't know enough about i've actually i've learned more about the laws here than the u.s now but

00:14:44.040 um i think we're gonna close out the show so thank you guys all for coming um we're gonna do

00:14:49.520 final thoughts so any final thoughts you want to say speak your piece on um start here go around

00:14:55.040 instagram social medias you want to shout go ahead okay um instagram i think i said that in the

00:15:02.200 beginning but i'll just say again um kiki underscore chi on instagram and i do have a hair page as well

00:15:08.720 touched by chi underscore um but final thoughts um i would just say honestly get married if you want

00:15:20.000 to get married if you don't want to get married no one's forcing you don't get married it's it's it's

00:15:24.880 as easy as that um and obviously like culture definitely does play a play a part um for example

00:15:31.720 like i'm nigerian so our culture is very much get married then have kids and this this that like

00:15:40.840 there's not really uh i wouldn't say like your career or like career isn't really like a big thing

00:15:48.200 like as much as education is pushed onto us to go and get that degree and everything like that

00:15:53.880 at the end of the day the end goal um in my type of culture is to get married is to have kids and

00:16:01.480 it just depends on different cultures and um when you have different cultures you're gonna have

00:16:05.640 different interpretations and different views and everyone has different views that's fine if

00:16:09.480 you don't want to get married that's fine but yeah that's my last thoughts um yeah uh instagram

00:16:17.320 sukaina tv s-u-k-a-i-n-a tv um you can also find me on tiktok sukaina louisa so yeah um final thoughts

00:16:30.600 final thoughts final thoughts um i would say let's not forget that marriage is a beautiful thing and a

00:16:37.160 very sacred thing i know it's kind of losing its value and a lot of people don't agree with it anymore

00:16:43.960 but please don't let that deter you from finding the love of your life and making that

00:16:49.320 important decision that you will ever ever make in your life and have that experience

00:16:54.840 um that a lot of people wish for please don't let that deter you from can i ask you a question

00:16:59.480 really quick i just feel like what you're saying is conflicting what do you mean because you're saying

00:17:04.360 it's a beautiful thing and it's a it's a you said something with religion right like it's a beautiful

00:17:10.440 thing it's yeah it's linked to a lot of people like yeah link it to religion but that like doesn't

00:17:15.480 compute to me if you believe in leaving if you're not happy oh well i said leaving based off like a

00:17:22.120 very extreme situation i didn't say leave just because you don't have butterflies anymore i thought

00:17:27.560 you said because you argue no okay no no no i'm i'm talking like extreme stuff like just abuse and

00:17:34.680 things like that um but yeah no i don't think you should leave of course you should try everything

00:17:41.240 that you can to make your marriage work and um i do believe in sticking it out with someone and

00:17:49.400 supporting someone and i think you know our generation do just want to move on to the next

00:17:54.680 thing but i feel like it's important to remember that really the grass is not greener on the other side

00:18:00.680 the grass is greener where you actually nurture it and you water it um i agree with that yeah and

00:18:06.520 you know this whole idea that you know you're going to move on to the next best shiny thing

00:18:10.840 that's just a complete fix it's not real if you find someone that is genuine is has a good soul has

00:18:18.280 a beautiful soul who looks after you takes care of you that is the most important thing in life

00:18:23.320 so stop looking at social media stop wishing that you had this and that because i feel like a lot of

00:18:28.600 women are wanting that nowadays and we all sit here and we talk about sick figures and things like

00:18:33.400 that but the reality is social media is pushing that narrative like we're looking at women who are 1.00

00:18:39.400 like but you shouldn't be with your man you should be with this man who buys you a hermer's bag and

00:18:43.960 flies you out to monaco and paris and all these places and i feel like that is literally just a fix and

00:18:51.160 if you start to look into that you are never truly going to be happy within yourself you're never going

00:18:55.560 to be fulfilled um because in the end we're all going to die and you know there yeah we are sorry

00:19:02.040 to be very like morbid but it's true you know and in the end all you really have is your memories

00:19:09.400 and you know the the the kind of impact that someone leaves and that is the things that we remember

00:19:17.480 you know being in love with someone sharing those beautiful moments and those things don't cost money you

00:19:22.280 know they don't you don't need money to create those things so yeah i think really and truly

00:19:27.960 just you know if you find someone who's genuine please don't trade that in for just someone who

00:19:34.200 looks good on instagram that's what i'm trying to say like really look at someone and who they are

00:19:40.680 inside because that is who's going to be with you for life that's the person that's going to lift you up

00:19:46.200 when you don't believe in yourself anymore that was very long i know we all want to go home

00:19:58.520 so my instagram is uh they are uh d e y a two uh how are they called underscore and x from x-ray um final

00:20:12.120 thoughts well you know i think you should follow your own feelings and if you feel like you want to

00:20:22.120 be with that person just be with that person don't let anyone change your mind don't let instagram change

00:20:29.880 your mind and if you're genuinely happy get married to kids uh i think all this matter is to be happy

00:20:41.000 and um yeah that's it

00:20:47.960 okay um uh instagram is laura lakova underscore x look over is l a c k over um very confusing um i think

00:20:59.320 in general just like just enjoy life live life if you want to get married don't get married i like it

00:21:05.800 uh i think it's it's quite nice to um spend the rest of your life with just that one person

00:21:13.720 um like 34 years i think it's really heartwarming but again i understand that the world is different now

00:21:20.760 um yeah that that that's it really uh be yourself um be in the present moment make memories as a few

00:21:30.360 people said there you go um so social media uh at real try francis on instagram at real try francis on

00:21:41.080 twitter at real try francis on youtube and at real try francis on tiktok as well and final thoughts i

00:21:47.240 actually got a wedding a marriage proposal when i was last on this show which was the other day

00:21:50.840 it says uh somebody sent me this right so it says troy is handsome thank you put together and socially

00:21:55.880 intelligent i wonder if he'd choose to marry an average looking traditional feminine wife or if he

00:22:00.360 prioritize hotness and looks above her upholding the traditional standard i'd love a husband like him

00:22:06.120 so if you're out there no

00:22:07.560 i could be just pearly things first um i probably i probably prioritize hotness really i don't know

00:22:18.280 can't she be hot and traditional i mean i like the honesty there yeah you actually can get the best

00:22:25.160 vocals you can you can get the best exactly yeah a hundred percent exactly you know there's someone out

00:22:31.080 there yes maybe can i come to the wedding i really want a wedding to go to we'll stream it

00:22:41.800 oh is it me yeah yeah um so my instagram is lucy underscore campbell one um but my final thoughts

00:22:51.960 are just don't we're all gonna die i said it to him before the show we're all gonna die one day

00:23:01.000 so live it up large now don't worry too much about things that happen in life because what's the point

00:23:07.320 um and don't get married unless you really thought about it because too many people rush into that 0.99

00:23:14.600 shit and then they're destroyed by the end of it um too many people don't believe in the religious 0.99

00:23:20.520 aspects of it which is where marriage comes from if you're not religious what are you really doing 1.00

00:23:25.880 it for are you doing it for financial gain are you doing it for yourself are you doing it for that

00:23:30.520 other person think about it just actually think about things before you do it like you know what i

00:23:38.120 mean um but yeah that's about the end of my thoughts i'm very opinionated and i apologize thanks

00:23:44.760 okay guys um make sure you like the video on your way out and subscribe to the channel um a couple

00:23:51.720 announcements before we end the show um the first thing is that we have two clips channels just pearly

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JustPearlyThings - March 27, 2023

Woman Admits to Dating a BETA

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