Louder with Crowder - ROCKET MAN RETURNS! Kim Jong Un Shows Off His THICC ICBM | Louder with Crowder

00:00:00.000 So I don't know how familiar you are with this, but the idea is that we sit down with

00:00:23.000 people, hopefully where it's a rational discussion.

00:00:30.000 And we sit down and we have a conversation.

00:00:48.000 Hey, Peter.

00:00:50.000 Yeah, Jesus?

00:00:50.000 You ready for this?

00:00:52.000 Yep, sure am.

00:00:53.000 When I pull this lever, it's going to start the Rapture.

00:00:56.000 And all the true Christians are going to come from Earth and land here in the Kingdom of God.

00:01:01.000 Yep.

00:01:01.000 Do you want to do this together?

00:01:04.000 Do this as a team?

00:01:05.000 Countdown?

00:01:06.000 Yeah, I mean, whatever you want to do.

00:01:07.000 Let's countdown from five.

00:01:08.000 I like five.

00:01:08.000 Ready?

00:01:09.000 Five.

00:01:11.000 Four.

00:01:12.000 Three.

00:01:13.000 Two.

00:01:14.000 One.

00:01:16.000 Rapture!

00:01:19.000 Hey, where's everybody?

00:01:22.000 Yeah, uh, Jesus, this is kind of what I was worried about. 0.97

00:01:26.000 Everybody on Earth is a pretty bad sinner.

00:01:29.000 Everybody?

00:01:29.000 I mean, surely somebody's worthy of the Kingdom of Heaven.

00:01:33.000 No, not really.

00:01:35.000 I mean, really, between the hatred, violence, and bad stand-up specials.

00:01:39.000 There's nobody down... I mean, internet porn itself makes it so 99% of humans can't get up here.

00:01:45.000 I really... Have you seen what they wrote about you on Twitter?

00:01:48.000 I have an account, but I don't ever check it.

00:01:51.000 I wouldn't check it.

00:01:52.000 It's just not gonna be good for your self-esteem.

00:01:54.000 I just think, uh...

00:01:56.000 I just think we're gonna have to lower the bar quite a bit if you want to get people into the club, if you know what I mean.

00:02:02.000 The bar's pretty low as it is.

00:02:03.000 I mean, I'm a forgiving kind of guy.

00:02:05.000 You know the crucifixion?

00:02:06.000 I was up there, forgave everybody's sins and stuff.

00:02:08.000 They're supposed to show up right now.

00:02:09.000 Yeah, no, you bring it up.

00:02:11.000 Uh, I know, um, but I just don't think... Oh!

00:02:15.000 Oh! 0.60

00:02:15.000 Spoke too soon, someone's coming. 0.60

00:02:19.000 It's, uh, it's Kirk Cameron.

00:02:21.000 You know what, tell him I'm not here.

00:02:26.000 Kirk!

00:02:28.000 Go back down.

00:02:30.000 That punch is not for you.

00:02:33.000 You didn't ask, that's stealing.

00:02:34.000 I'm telling you, you can't come in.

00:03:33.000 That's a horrible start to my day.

00:03:35.000 We have a lot to discuss today, by the way.

00:03:37.000 I don't know if you noticed, North Korea, they've been launching some fireworks.

00:03:40.000 We'll talk about that.

00:03:41.000 Cory Booker is straight.

00:03:44.000 We'll talk about that.

00:03:46.000 Fact check. 0.99

00:03:47.000 Liar. 0.95

00:03:49.000 Right away Snopes is like, okay, yeah, no. 0.98

00:03:54.000 Him and Magic Johnson, they have like the straight man's version of the Rotary Club.

00:03:57.000 Yeah!

00:03:58.000 And we'll be talking about the refugee crisis, which, you know, is not really a crisis, and a lot of people are accusing the United States of being racist and only caring about Ukrainian refugees.

00:04:08.000 Let me just give you the short end of it, okay?

00:04:11.000 The short end of it is this.

00:04:12.000 We've taken in more refugees who are not white over the last few years.

00:04:17.000 That's just a recap.

00:04:17.000 taken in the most amount of Ukrainian refugees, namely like Poland and Hungary, have been

00:04:21.000 excoriated.

00:04:22.000 Also, the reason that Americans are more sympathetic is because these are women and children as

00:04:25.000 opposed to military-aged fighting men leaving Syria and bringing their Kalashnikovs.

00:04:30.000 So that's just a recap.

00:04:32.000 Before we move on to anything else, YouTube, and I'm going to tell you this, we have no

00:04:36.000 idea how long.

00:04:37.000 You guys can comment below.

00:04:38.000 Two questions.

00:04:39.000 Over-under on how long this show stays up when I introduce who we have here in the studio today.

00:04:44.000 I don't know what over-under means.

00:04:45.000 I understand it's a betting term, correct?

00:04:47.000 And would you rather date a Syrian refugee or Ukrainian refugee?

00:04:51.000 Comment below.

00:04:52.000 Men, women, Zs are all welcome.

00:04:54.000 Gerald, I don't have time for you today because we have two other people here.

00:04:57.000 We have, of course, Landau Dave.

00:04:59.000 Ahoy! 0.99

00:05:01.000 And Nick DiPaolo is in studio in third slash fourth.

00:05:04.000 Hello, how are you?

00:05:05.000 I'm doing well, how are you?

00:05:06.000 Great, great to be here.

00:05:07.000 What are you doing?

00:05:08.000 I'm trying out a character.

00:05:11.000 Are you the ventriloquist?

00:05:13.000 I'm Cory Booker's ego.

00:05:15.000 Or id, or lit, whatever.

00:05:17.000 And every time Rosario Dawson leans in for a kiss you have to go, No, we had a deal.

00:05:22.000 We had an agreement.

00:05:24.000 This is an arrangement.

00:05:25.000 Gross.

00:05:26.000 Were they dating or something? 0.98

00:05:27.000 Yeah, well, she's covering for him.

00:05:29.000 Right, Snopes?

00:05:29.000 Allegedly.

00:05:30.000 Right.

00:05:31.000 I thought she was dating Gerald Nadler.

00:05:34.000 No, she was dating a Jerry Nadler.

00:05:36.000 Ah!

00:05:38.000 Common misconception.

00:05:39.000 No, I don't, of course, no, look, he's straight as an arrow, Cory Booker.

00:05:39.000 Yeah.

00:05:43.000 And Nick, you're going to be, this weekend, you're doing Hyenas.

00:05:48.000 Hyenas, Friday night in Dallas, two shows, and then Saturday night in Fort Worth.

00:05:52.000 I didn't know there was a difference.

00:05:54.000 Boom! 0.99

00:05:54.000 There is. 0.99

00:05:55.000 They got a thing about that.

00:05:55.000 Yeah.

00:05:57.000 How far are they apart, the clubs?

00:06:00.000 I don't know how far apart they are, but I was just... Because I'm walking, by the way.

00:06:03.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.

00:06:04.000 Well, that's always... Be sure to... It's a nice stroll down South Dallas.

00:06:08.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.

00:06:09.000 Can't miss that scenery.

00:06:10.000 And if you can, make it out to Denton, UNT, where we did the Change My Mind.

00:06:13.000 It's the Harvard of Denton County.

00:06:15.000 Yes.

00:06:15.000 It's the what?

00:06:16.000 It's the Harvard of Denton County.

00:06:17.000 Very nice.

00:06:18.000 Harvard?

00:06:18.000 Yeah.

00:06:19.000 Well, let's see.

00:06:20.000 He's not an academic type.

00:06:22.000 Excuse me, I'm not an academic type.

00:06:24.000 I went to the University of Maine, 2.4, Business Administration.

00:06:27.000 That's pretty good.

00:06:28.000 Like I said, I'm not the academic type.

00:06:30.000 Well, then you should know that UNT is the Harvard of Denton.

00:06:34.000 You're talking about Texas.

00:06:35.000 Who cares?

00:06:36.000 I'm not talking about Texas.

00:06:37.000 I'm talking about exclusively Denton.

00:06:38.000 It is the Harvard of Denton County only.

00:06:40.000 What the hell is Denton?

00:06:41.000 Well, that's usually the follow-up question, and that's why it's the Harvard of Denton.

00:06:44.000 It's in Denton.

00:06:45.000 Yes.

00:06:45.000 Denton is in what state?

00:06:47.000 This does not include Collin County.

00:06:48.000 It does not include the surrounding counties.

00:06:50.000 Is this Texas?

00:06:51.000 I think so.

00:06:52.000 Yes, it's Denton County, Texas.

00:06:53.000 Okay, then I was right.

00:06:54.000 It's Texas.

00:06:54.000 Who cares?

00:06:55.000 It's the Harvard of Denton County, and they deserve the respect.

00:06:55.000 Go ahead.

00:06:58.000 A lot of people sending their kids to Texas for a good education?

00:07:03.000 Not Denton County, apparently.

00:07:04.000 Well, from the southern border.

00:07:06.000 Now, what is Denton?

00:07:07.000 A lot of them sending their sons to UT to set women's freestyle swim meet records.

00:07:11.000 Yeah, it's usually over a fence, but not really for college.

00:07:14.000 Their mascot's gonna change from a longhorn to just long, And Dave, you're going to be in Wisconsin?

00:07:24.000 April 30th, yes.

00:07:26.000 Green Bay, the Meyer Theater.

00:07:28.000 So we have a lot to get to.

00:07:29.000 Like I said, it goes off the rails here quickly, but we love having everyone.

00:07:32.000 First up, Lizzo.

00:07:34.000 Has a new show.

00:07:35.000 She has a new show, a new series.

00:07:35.000 Did you know this?

00:07:38.000 You a big Lizzo fan there, Nick?

00:07:39.000 I know more about Denton. 1.00

00:07:43.000 I know Lizzo has a nice little heart-shaped ass. 1.00

00:07:45.000 Well that's what happens when Lizzo sits on the hood of a car. 1.00

00:07:49.000 Did you headbutt this?

00:07:53.000 So Lizzo's new series, Big Girls with multiple Rs. 0.85

00:07:58.000 Let's take a look.

00:07:59.000 Let's go!

00:08:04.000 Let's get it in!

00:08:05.000 Okay.

00:08:06.000 Watch out for the big girl. 1.00

00:08:07.000 Watch out for the big girl. 1.00

00:08:08.000 One generally does.

00:08:10.000 Are these her friends?

00:08:13.000 I think so.

00:08:15.000 Is that all her?

00:08:16.000 No, that's not.

00:08:17.000 What was that casting call?

00:08:19.000 Oh, that's Margaret Chuck.

00:08:20.000 She looks horrible.

00:08:21.000 Watch out, she's gonna do her mom's voice! 1.00

00:08:27.000 Is this a teaser?

00:08:28.000 What is this?

00:08:30.000 Okay, so that's like a jumbo highlighter.

00:08:32.000 It looks like the Cowboys starting lineup.

00:08:34.000 Yes!

00:08:35.000 Moesha has gained some weight since the 90s.

00:08:38.000 Oh, Asia, like the continent.

00:08:40.000 They can still move.

00:08:42.000 Ariane double prom day.

00:08:49.000 Yeah, count me in.

00:08:52.000 Watch out for the corny! 1.00

00:08:53.000 You notice how all those girls were big but just not quite as big as Lizzo? 0.99

00:08:56.000 Is that like the hot girl thing where they hang out with other girls that are not quite as attractive?

00:09:00.000 She's like, y'all are not quite as fat as me.

00:09:00.000 Yeah, exactly.

00:09:03.000 She did have Chris Farley working for The Weeknd.

00:09:09.000 Only there was no Swayze.

00:09:10.000 That one girl that did the splits couldn't get up, by the way. 1.00

00:09:13.000 No, she had to roll back.

00:09:14.000 Had to come out with a blowtorch. 0.99

00:09:20.000 It's like getting your tongue stuck to a frozen pole.

00:09:22.000 Yeah, it was just a mopped floor, and they were like, oh, no.

00:09:27.000 Goodness.

00:09:27.000 Mind salt.

00:09:28.000 It's like to warm them up, you know, they have those massage guns with them. 0.95

00:09:31.000 They had to use one of those belt sanders. 1.00

00:09:35.000 I gotta do splits, bitch! 1.00

00:09:36.000 Get the belt sander! 1.00

00:09:40.000 Get the Dewar or the Milwaukee power tool.

00:09:43.000 At least it told us what the show is about.

00:09:46.000 It did, yeah.

00:09:47.000 It's dropping tomorrow.

00:09:48.000 What's it about?

00:09:49.000 Cholesterol?

00:09:52.000 Exactly, and diabetes feet.

00:09:53.000 Yeah, really?

00:09:57.000 Thought I saw a B.B.

00:09:57.000 King in there.

00:09:59.000 The ghost of Wilford Brimley is just cashing in.

00:10:04.000 One's just playing Lucille at the end.

00:10:06.000 Yeah.

00:10:07.000 Well, there's also probably, Tom Selleck, probably a few reverse mortgages in the future.

00:10:10.000 So, and some mesothelioma, you know, because they got the, uh, got the cobalt slash asbestos hip replacement.

00:10:10.000 Oh, for sure.

00:10:16.000 A couple rascal scooters to go around.

00:10:20.000 You'd need a few.

00:10:20.000 A tub with a door on it.

00:10:22.000 Yes, legless shopping.

00:10:24.000 But at least they'd make it to the Grand Canyon.

00:10:26.000 Okay.

00:10:28.000 So, uh, I don't know what you're saying.

00:10:29.000 That's not nice.

00:10:30.000 Look, it's called Big Girls, and it's celebrating, uh, uh, dying. 0.76

00:10:37.000 Slowly.

00:10:38.000 Yeah.

00:10:39.000 You don't know that yet.

00:10:40.000 No, we don't know that yet.

00:10:41.000 Just wait.

00:10:42.000 I'm praying.

00:10:43.000 A year.

00:10:43.000 It must be so hard.

00:10:44.000 Are there any doctors out there?

00:10:45.000 Physicians?

00:10:46.000 Can you comment?

00:10:47.000 Comment below if you're on YouTube.

00:10:48.000 Doctors?

00:10:48.000 Physicians?

00:10:49.000 Because we have the Change My Mind coming up Monday, and one guy was even saying, you know, transgender people being discriminated against by all, and I even said, like, doctors.

00:10:55.000 He goes, yeah, like, doctors.

00:10:57.000 Miss, what is a doctor going to do?

00:10:59.000 You can't- oh, hey, what's your, uh, what's your sa- uh, uh, uh, you know what?

00:11:02.000 Okay, height and waaaa- you know what?

00:11:04.000 Let's just leave this blank and, uh, give you an A-okay.

00:11:09.000 How do you do it?

00:11:10.000 You- well, it's- isn't it illegal?

00:11:13.000 It's not illegal, but they're trying to make it so.

00:11:15.000 First of all, there's four of them on the planet, so it's really not an issue, but go ahead.

00:11:20.000 Right.

00:11:20.000 There are four planets.

00:11:22.000 Yeah.

00:11:22.000 There's one trans on each planet.

00:11:24.000 Yes.

00:11:26.000 Yes.

00:11:27.000 The point is, something about the moon and the tides, gravitational pull, I don't know, but Lizzo just caused, she fast-forwarded a hundred years of climate change.

00:11:36.000 Thanks for that.

00:11:37.000 Take it up with her.

00:11:37.000 Thanks for that.

00:11:38.000 Now let's move on to someone else who is very respectable, though.

00:11:42.000 Ken, sorry, Ken.

00:11:44.000 Ketanji Brown-Jackson.

00:11:46.000 No, you had it right.

00:11:47.000 Yes.

00:11:48.000 Kenneth Jackson.

00:11:52.000 Well, more important than that, Cory Booker had his turn to grill the Supreme Court nominee.

00:11:56.000 So we talked yesterday about how this Supreme Court nominee, you know, has made it her raison d'être to lessen sentences for child pornographers. 0.99

00:11:56.000 Okay. 0.99

00:12:05.000 But Cory Booker wanted to make sure that he got his shots in, like he did with Kavanaugh.

00:12:11.000 Remember his Spartacus moment?

00:12:12.000 Yeah.

00:12:13.000 Except instead of saying, I'm Spartacus, everyone just moved one seat away and said, I'm not with him.

00:12:20.000 And he did not hold back.

00:12:21.000 Here he is laying into the potential justice on the most important court in the land.

00:12:25.000 As Langston Hughes wrote, oh let America be America again!

00:12:31.000 The land that never has been yet, but yet must be the land where everyone is free.

00:12:37.000 Oh yes, I say it plain America, never was America to me, but I swear this oath, America will be.

00:12:45.000 And how much wood would a woodchuck chuck?

00:12:46.000 That is the story of how you got to this desk, and so you faced insults here that were shocking to me.

00:12:52.000 Well, actually not shocking.

00:12:57.000 But you are here because of that kind of love.

00:13:01.000 And nobody's taking this away from me.

00:13:03.000 Don't worry.

00:13:06.000 She's disgust.

00:13:07.000 God has got you.

00:13:08.000 On the left.

00:13:10.000 And how do I know that?

00:13:12.000 Because you're here.

00:13:13.000 And I know what it's taken for you to sit in that seat.

00:13:17.000 You got here how every black woman in America who's gotten anywhere has done. 1.00

00:13:22.000 Adopted by white parents.

00:13:24.000 By being like Ginger Rogers said.

00:13:28.000 I did everything Fred Astaire did, but backwards in heels.

00:13:32.000 Then he said, mmm, Fred Astaire.

00:13:34.000 And so I'm just sitting here saying, nobody's stealing my joint.

00:13:37.000 Nobody's going to make me angry.

00:13:39.000 The person I will nominate will be someone with extraordinary qualifications, character, experience, and integrity.

00:13:47.000 And that person will be the first black woman ever nominated to the United States Supreme Court. 0.86

00:13:53.000 Okay, it's just like affirmative action.

00:13:55.000 Let's say that Ms.

00:13:56.000 Jackson becomes a Supreme Court Justice.

00:13:57.000 It's like affirmative action. 0.54

00:13:59.000 She can never know if it's because she was qualified.

00:14:01.000 That's the issue here.

00:14:02.000 You rob people of their win.

00:14:02.000 because I don't want to say man or woman because she can't define it so I wouldn't want to deadname

00:14:06.000 No, no, no, you... Ms. Jackson. Yeah. Becomes a Supreme Court justice. It's like affirmative 0.97

00:14:11.000 action. She can never know if it's because she was qualified. That's the issue here. You rob

00:14:16.000 people of their win. She can never know if she was the right person for the job because 0.91

00:14:20.000 former Vice President Joe Biden said it will be a black woman.

00:14:24.000 Well, that eliminates a good portion of the pool of talent.

00:14:30.000 Are you saying there was nobody else qualified?

00:14:32.000 How about you just go with qualified?

00:14:34.000 And if it turns out to be her, I am all for it. 0.99

00:14:36.000 Well, the problem is if you're qualified, they accuse you of being a gang rapist. 0.98

00:14:39.000 Well, that's true.

00:14:41.000 But it wouldn't.

00:14:44.000 Remember him with Kavanaugh?

00:14:45.000 Oh, yeah.

00:14:46.000 Oh, yeah.

00:14:47.000 Just a grandstanding.

00:14:48.000 He just made that all up.

00:14:50.000 He just said he did a little five-man, you know, one-act show, one-man play for himself.

00:14:55.000 She was even getting irritated. 1.00

00:14:57.000 Hey, this is my moment, bitch. 1.00

00:14:58.000 Yes, exactly. 1.00

00:15:00.000 That's the look she had on her face. 0.94

00:15:01.000 He's such a...

00:15:03.000 He never misses an opportunity to grandstand, and he screwed up Newark so bad that he decided to go to Congress.

00:15:03.000 Oh, he's a tool, man.

00:15:09.000 Yes, exactly.

00:15:10.000 He robbed that city of millions and millions and millions of dollars in funding for education, just completely wasted it on corporate people coming in and advising from New York, ransacked the city, and then's like, I think I'll run for Congress.

00:15:10.000 I don't understand.

00:15:22.000 Yeah, that's a good idea.

00:15:23.000 Gerald, the correct term is jacked.

00:15:25.000 He jacked the city.

00:15:26.000 Jacked the city, yes.

00:15:27.000 Don't be insensitive.

00:15:28.000 Every guy that would let him.

00:15:29.000 Yes.

00:15:31.000 Unbelievable.

00:15:32.000 By guy you mean woman.

00:15:33.000 Yes, every woman who he likes very very much.

00:15:39.000 Can't get enough of the ladies. 1.00

00:15:41.000 Here's also Booker providing an anecdote which 100% you can take this to the bank, actually happened.

00:15:51.000 We appreciate something that we get that a lot of my colleagues don't.

00:15:55.000 I know Tim Scott does.

00:15:59.000 When I first came to this place, I was the fourth black person ever popularly elected to the United States Senate, and I still remember... The fourth?

00:16:06.000 A lot of mixed people, white folks, black folks work here, but at night, when people are in line to come in to clean this place... It's their fort. 0.98

00:16:06.000 An accomplishment? 0.98

00:16:14.000 That ends at three.

00:16:15.000 The percentage of minorities shift a lot, and so I'm walking here, first week I'm here, and somebody who's been here for decades doing the Urgent work of the Senate, but it's the unglamorous work that goes on no matter who's in offices. 1.00

00:16:26.000 The guy comes up to me, all he wants to say I can tell is, I'm so happy you're here, but he comes up and he can't get the words out.

00:16:32.000 And this man, my elder, starts crying.

00:16:35.000 Not a joke.

00:16:38.000 And I just hugged him, and he just kept telling me, it is so good to see you here.

00:16:42.000 It's so good to see you here.

00:16:43.000 And we couldn't stop kissing!

00:16:45.000 Turns out we were related.

00:16:46.000 He was my half-brother.

00:16:48.000 Can you give me some money?

00:16:48.000 Right.

00:16:50.000 She's just rolling her tongue around in her mouth. 0.97

00:16:53.000 Yeah, like Nancy Pelosi. 0.97

00:16:54.000 She's sucking on her dentures. 1.00

00:16:56.000 Yeah, just... What an idiot that... Oh my God. 1.00

00:16:59.000 He came and I knew what he wanted to say to me, but he couldn't get the words out. 1.00

00:17:03.000 Yeah.

00:17:03.000 Was it... Hugh?

00:17:04.000 How did you know?

00:17:07.000 I was the fourth, what is it, what point are you saying? 0.99

00:17:10.000 I was the 19th junior senator who was biracial, dammit. 0.99

00:17:16.000 I mean, what, it's like, okay, you were the fourth black guy who was elected, just stop, we get it. 0.99

00:17:20.000 They cannot, they just can't stop themselves from wedging it in there.

00:17:24.000 He's the fourth.

00:17:25.000 Well, Stephen, they're natural entertainers.

00:17:27.000 Yes.

00:17:30.000 And jumpers.

00:17:32.000 I'm just trying to say the most racist.

00:17:34.000 They're natural entertainers.

00:17:36.000 Yes, they're a very oratory culture.

00:17:38.000 Real people can really talk, man.

00:17:40.000 Is it just Jimmy the Greek talking? 1.00

00:17:41.000 Yes!

00:17:43.000 You see what it is. 0.99

00:17:44.000 This is just like when leftists, they just make up ridiculous stories about their kids. 0.99

00:17:48.000 That's what it is. 0.93

00:17:50.000 Yeah, my three-year-old said to me, Mom, every time we use plastic straws, the whales cry for the planet.

00:17:55.000 Yes, it totally happens every time.

00:17:57.000 The dolphins keep getting caught in the tuna nets.

00:18:01.000 Oh, thank you, two-year-old.

00:18:02.000 The most profound tweets that you read where you're like, the kid hangs himself at five.

00:18:07.000 With a six-pack plastic ring.

00:18:09.000 And he used a tweed rope.

00:18:10.000 Yeah, because you took away his toy.

00:18:13.000 He's upstairs hanging himself with a slinky dog.

00:18:16.000 Took away his sickle and hammer.

00:18:19.000 Cory Booker goes and he finds his goldfish caught in a little six-pack wire, just taking himself out.

00:18:24.000 He never misses an opportunity to make about himself though, right?

00:18:29.000 His pet turtle is just making his way to the plastic straw pack.

00:18:32.000 I think he went into Mr. Bojangles at the end.

00:18:39.000 You don't know this?

00:18:40.000 I heard it was a spitball.

00:18:41.000 Go ahead.

00:18:42.000 From Dean Martin.

00:18:43.000 It's like what Sammy Davis Jr. did.

00:18:45.000 It's how he died.

00:18:47.000 I thought you were too young to know that.

00:18:49.000 The drivers...

00:18:51.000 That's how he lost the eye.

00:18:53.000 People who don't know...

00:18:55.000 You don't know this?

00:18:57.000 I heard it was a spitball.

00:18:59.000 Go ahead.

00:19:01.000 It's just Frank spitting.

00:19:03.000 Do you know how he lost his eye?

00:19:05.000 Car accident.

00:19:06.000 So it's a car accident, but it's worse than that.

00:19:08.000 Back then, Cadillacs, the horn, had a protruding, sharp, 3D ornament.

00:19:13.000 So he crashed and went, you're kidding me.

00:19:13.000 You're kidding me.

00:19:15.000 You're kidding me.

00:19:17.000 That's the best story ever.

00:19:18.000 Yeah, that's how he lost his eye.

00:19:21.000 Most people think it's from Frank hitting him from not shining his shoes correctly.

00:19:27.000 That was a lip.

00:19:28.000 That was a lip.

00:19:31.000 Oh man, that was a good one.

00:19:34.000 Who decided, let's make these horns sharper than they were before? 1.00

00:19:37.000 That's so funny, yeah.

00:19:38.000 They're looking at it way before airbags.

00:19:40.000 They're like, what do we need?

00:19:41.000 I don't know, protruding glass?

00:19:43.000 That was a true Ray Charles.

00:19:44.000 Borrowed that car like a week later.

00:19:46.000 Same thing here.

00:19:47.000 That's when they came up with the double glass.

00:19:50.000 Gotta get both of them.

00:19:51.000 Boy, this glass really should be tempered.

00:19:53.000 Oh, yeah.

00:19:54.000 Information I could have used yesterday, babe.

00:19:56.000 So Cadillac blinded Sammy Days?

00:19:59.000 They don't use that in their ads still?

00:20:02.000 Come on, man.

00:20:03.000 It's the best car out there.

00:20:06.000 Yeah, they could have at least had him as the spokesperson.

00:20:08.000 The guy died 30 million in debt.

00:20:08.000 Exactly!

00:20:10.000 Exactly!

00:20:11.000 Dave, he couldn't see the cars very well.

00:20:13.000 True story.

00:20:14.000 My father-in-law saw Ray Charles at the airport, hand to God, was reading a Playboy in Braille.

00:20:19.000 That's a true story.

00:20:20.000 How'd that happen?

00:20:20.000 Oh, God!

00:20:22.000 One-handed. 0.99

00:20:26.000 I like them titties. 0.98

00:20:28.000 Is that a topographical? 0.99

00:20:31.000 Turn-offs.

00:20:33.000 Smokers. 1.00

00:20:35.000 Arrogant men. 1.00

00:20:36.000 Blind guys. 1.00

00:20:37.000 What the hell? 1.00

00:20:37.000 Black guys. 1.00

00:20:39.000 Every time. 1.00

00:20:41.000 Oh, them boobs feel good. 0.96

00:20:42.000 Steering wheel horns that are sharp. 0.96

00:20:48.000 Chain link glove departments.

00:20:49.000 I don't know why.

00:20:50.000 So, uh... Do you ever see, like, old baby seats?

00:20:54.000 Yeah.

00:20:54.000 They're just meat hooks.

00:20:55.000 Yes, exactly.

00:20:56.000 With, like, you put the baby in the middle.

00:20:57.000 That's all they were in, like, the 1950s and 60s.

00:20:57.000 Yeah.

00:20:59.000 Yes!

00:21:00.000 Umbrella handles, you could make them a little... And if you were in the front seat, you were lucky enough to get someone's arm.

00:21:06.000 Yeah, the best.

00:21:07.000 Yeah.

00:21:08.000 But if they decided to just grip the wheel, it was like, well, we gotta get a new kid.

00:21:08.000 Stop short.

00:21:12.000 Sammy, take the wheel!

00:21:13.000 You're gonna lose an eye!

00:21:16.000 So, all right, North Korea. 0.52

00:21:17.000 Let's move on to this.

00:21:18.000 Anything more on Cory Booker?

00:21:19.000 No, I think we've done our job.

00:21:21.000 North Korea, going to international news here.

00:21:24.000 Well, I guess it's a segue. 0.96

00:21:25.000 Insane people. 0.88

00:21:27.000 Insane people with closeted urges. 0.91

00:21:30.000 Kim Jong-un test-fired a new intercontinental ballistic missile today.

00:21:37.000 Yeah, Kim's style is unmatched. 1.00

00:21:37.000 Yeah. 1.00

00:21:40.000 Yeah, well, he showed up in a Tom Cruise jacket from Top Gun.

00:21:44.000 Yeah, yeah, he did.

00:21:44.000 Oh, did he really?

00:21:46.000 He uses the collar as a bib.

00:21:48.000 Like the fur and everything?

00:21:51.000 It's pretty exciting.

00:21:52.000 He's crab.

00:21:54.000 He looks like Andrew Rice Clay.

00:21:59.000 Little boy broke!

00:22:00.000 He needed the money!

00:22:02.000 Throw that picture up there again.

00:22:02.000 Oh, hey!

00:22:04.000 Yeah, throw that picture up there. 0.85

00:22:05.000 Throw that picture up there again.

00:22:06.000 Of Kim Jong-un.

00:22:07.000 Kim Jong.

00:22:07.000 Throw it up.

00:22:08.000 I gotta find one.

00:22:09.000 Oh, no!

00:22:10.000 Oh, you didn't see it?

00:22:11.000 I haven't either.

00:22:11.000 No.

00:22:12.000 Oh, I thought we had that picture of him in the James Dean jacket.

00:22:15.000 Yeah, he's got his... Have you ever seen that where he wears his little James Dean jacket?

00:22:18.000 Kim Jong-un?

00:22:19.000 Yeah, he's got his little... It looks like right before Lefty gets whacked at the end of Donnie Brosco.

00:22:23.000 And he just... That's like how he dresses now.

00:22:27.000 Like, I think he got all of Pacino's stuff from that movie.

00:22:30.000 All the jewelry?

00:22:31.000 Yeah.

00:22:31.000 Right before he goes out?

00:22:32.000 Does he take the jewelry?

00:22:33.000 No, he leaves it all.

00:22:34.000 He leaves the jewelry.

00:22:35.000 Aw, he was generous.

00:22:35.000 He leaves it at home.

00:22:36.000 And his wallet, because he knows he's gonna die.

00:22:39.000 Yeah, he's not coming back.

00:22:39.000 I do that every time I do a gig with my wife.

00:22:42.000 Well, that's what Al Pacino does now every time he does a new acting gig.

00:22:45.000 No, the comedy gig on Detroit, here, is my wallet.

00:22:49.000 I feel that way every time Al Pacino appears on camera right now.

00:22:51.000 When I was watching the, uh, not The Departed, The Irishman.

00:22:53.000 I'm sitting in a hat and I'm like, wait, is he supposed to be Jimmy Hoffa?

00:22:53.000 Yes.

00:22:57.000 Jimmy Hoffa's a Midwestern.

00:22:58.000 He's like, I'm Jimmy Hoffa here!

00:22:59.000 Alright, here it is. 1.00

00:23:02.000 Oh my god, it's a gay... You're tearing me apart! 1.00

00:23:06.000 It's a gay Fonzie. 1.00

00:23:07.000 Yes. 0.94

00:23:09.000 It's like an Asian Elon Musk. 0.99

00:23:12.000 Instead of hitting a jukebox, he hits a public stall.

00:23:15.000 Hey! 0.99

00:23:16.000 Glory holy, just taps it twice.

00:23:20.000 And nobody here!

00:23:24.000 So this is the first intercontinental, I'm just gonna say ICBM from here on out, ICBM test since November of, I think it's 2017.

00:23:30.000 It's been a while.

00:23:32.000 And that was of course before the Singapore summit with Trump, and the missile went higher, longer than the 2017, and that one was called Hwasong, which I know I had to look that up to make sure I had it right, I thought it was a phone company.

00:23:45.000 And that showed that it could hit the United States.

00:23:47.000 Oh, that's good.

00:23:48.000 That's exactly what we need, is a much more capable North Korea aligning with Russia, other people that don't like us. 0.60

00:23:55.000 That's fantastic.

00:23:55.000 I love it when those things fall in the water.

00:23:58.000 That's what I like.

00:23:59.000 Not when they actually can fly.

00:24:00.000 Well, hopefully we can stop it through the missile defense system that everyone mocked that Ronald Reagan helped spearhead, which ended up becoming the actual basis for all of Israel's defense, their Iron Dome.

00:24:11.000 The Iron Dome.

00:24:13.000 Otherwise known as Cory Booker.

00:24:14.000 Good night, everybody.

00:24:16.000 That's the iron rod.

00:24:20.000 Spare the roses. 0.98

00:24:21.000 Nickname at the bathhouse.

00:24:22.000 Yes.

00:24:23.000 And by nickname, we just mean pet name from Fauci.

00:24:23.000 Salido.

00:24:25.000 No one else called him that.

00:24:27.000 It was an exclusive.

00:24:27.000 What happened to that little girl?

00:24:29.000 Oh, we're going to get into Fauci in a little bit.

00:24:30.000 He's going to retire soon.

00:24:31.000 So is Booker.

00:24:32.000 Is what, a bowler?

00:24:34.000 Yes, a towel boy. 1.00

00:24:36.000 That's actually, I should let you guys know, 7 plus 1 things that Fauci's going to do next.

00:24:39.000 We haven't done a 7 plus 1 in a while.

00:24:39.000 Yeah, we have that.

00:24:40.000 So hey, by the way, Kim Jong-un, missile now, capable of hitting the United States.

00:24:44.000 Longer, further than ever, more powerful.

00:24:45.000 You remember when former Vice President Joe Biden said this a little over a year ago?

00:24:49.000 America is back!

00:24:51.000 I speak today as President of the United States, at the very start of my administration, and I'm sending a clear message to the world.

00:24:58.000 America is back!

00:25:01.000 That's like a Backstreet Boys song.

00:25:03.000 It's always a comeback.

00:25:04.000 It's like, guess who's back?

00:25:05.000 What?

00:25:06.000 I never knew you left.

00:25:07.000 Now we're here again and we're here to stay this time.

00:25:09.000 Where did you go?

00:25:11.000 Exactly.

00:25:12.000 That's what I never understood.

00:25:13.000 Did anybody, even Democrats, buy that?

00:25:16.000 We're back from what?

00:25:17.000 A perfect economy?

00:25:18.000 Exactly.

00:25:20.000 We have respect all over the world?

00:25:21.000 We built up our military?

00:25:23.000 Back from what?

00:25:24.000 Got people to start spending their own fair share in NATO?

00:25:26.000 Yes!

00:25:26.000 We're back to sucking up to countries we don't like in the first place.

00:25:29.000 Build back better.

00:25:31.000 It sounds like a slogan at Home Depot on Labor Day.

00:25:33.000 Right.

00:25:36.000 Only it'd be pronounced in Spanish.

00:25:37.000 Yeah.

00:25:39.000 Which is, I believe, a Bildo Baco Beturro.

00:25:41.000 Beturro.

00:25:42.000 That's how I think it is.

00:25:43.000 Absolutely not.

00:25:43.000 How I think it goes.

00:25:44.000 Not true.

00:25:44.000 So let's go through it though.

00:25:46.000 How back is America on the world stage?

00:25:46.000 He meant this internationally.

00:25:49.000 Okay, well we had the Afghanistan withdrawal.

00:25:50.000 We still don't know how many Americans have been left there.

00:25:51.000 Of course you had Russia invade Ukraine.

00:25:54.000 You have Iran now producing enriched uranium.

00:25:56.000 Of course, we've emboldened China and we're standing with them.

00:25:58.000 Now we have North Korea testing the intercontinental ballistic missiles more effectively than ever before.

00:26:03.000 And something that I find really funny, rather than getting oil from ourselves, we're begging Venezuela.

00:26:09.000 Here's the funny thing is, they haven't made up their mind.

00:26:13.000 Not sure yet.

00:26:14.000 Former Vice President Joe Biden is like, hey, evil dictator Maduro, could you give us oil?

00:26:19.000 Like, I don't know.

00:26:20.000 Oh, Stephen, you're just cherry-picking points.

00:26:23.000 You just listed off 55.

00:26:25.000 That's what they'd say to you.

00:26:26.000 As long as we have pipelines here, it doesn't matter.

00:26:29.000 Saudi Arabia's not taking our calls anyway, but they took calls from Putin, so yeah, we're definitely back.

00:26:34.000 We love when oil companies don't take our calls.

00:26:37.000 Yeah, we're fine.

00:26:37.000 Yeah, we're good.

00:26:38.000 I'm not a big Saudi Arabia fan.

00:26:39.000 The only way I would call Saudi Arabia is if I had like Donald Duck and Chippendale, where when I call, but I push a button, they pick up the phone and the dynamite explodes on the other end of the receiver, but it somehow goes through. 0.99

00:26:49.000 We have the first president who shit his pants at the Vatican. 0.99

00:26:52.000 Yep, yep. 1.00

00:26:53.000 Good for him.

00:26:54.000 Even God hates him.

00:26:55.000 Yeah, even the Lord is like, huh?

00:26:57.000 A lot of Cub Scouts have, but not a president.

00:27:01.000 That's just because some... Oh, it's a merit badge, Nick!

00:27:05.000 Come on.

00:27:06.000 Don't steal their accomplishment.

00:27:08.000 It's the Vatican poop badge. 0.54

00:27:10.000 It's the Vatican, yeah. 0.95

00:27:11.000 It's right next to your gimp bracelet. 1.00

00:27:12.000 Hey, by the way, Light a candle for your anus. 0.99

00:27:16.000 That's what it is. 0.99

00:27:17.000 Is that when the smoke comes out of the Vatican, they're trying to get the smell out of the house?

00:27:23.000 I thought they had a poopery sponsorship.

00:27:26.000 Just turns out they needed it.

00:27:29.000 Lifetime supply.

00:27:30.000 It was Brussels sprouts.

00:27:31.000 Brussels sprout night.

00:27:35.000 Like holy water there.

00:27:38.000 Yeah, but what about that cardinal with the beach house?

00:27:42.000 They were having asparagus, so that was also... Yeah, it was just a mess.

00:27:44.000 Oh, okay.

00:27:45.000 But all over the world, ladies and gentlemen.

00:27:46.000 Cardinal's beach house? 0.60

00:27:48.000 Lactose intolerant cardinal beach house?

00:27:50.000 Yes.

00:27:51.000 What about the rest of all of the cardinals were having asparagus and brussels sprouts?

00:27:54.000 All of them.

00:27:55.000 That's what happened.

00:27:55.000 It's a problem, we've been telling them.

00:27:57.000 They need to vary their diet.

00:27:59.000 Hey, lightoffcreditor.com slash tour, Dave and I are going to be in Tulsa, the Tulsa Ballroom, May 14th.

00:28:05.000 June 18th, we added a show to Pike's Peak Center in Colorado Springs.

00:28:10.000 So, May and June, we had to add a show because it sold out.

00:28:12.000 Thank you guys.

00:28:14.000 And, alright, let's move on to Fauci.

00:28:17.000 You asked about it.

00:28:18.000 We have to?

00:28:20.000 I hate it.

00:28:20.000 Fine.

00:28:21.000 Why do you have to ruin every show that we do?

00:28:23.000 Why do you have to do that?

00:28:23.000 Try hard.

00:28:24.000 You know, we're sitting here.

00:28:25.000 Takes effort, Stephen.

00:28:27.000 Be careful.

00:28:28.000 Have to find new ways.

00:28:29.000 I think he's Ned Flanders.

00:28:31.000 I yelled at him on the phone last week and then the power went out on my late show.

00:28:36.000 Listen, I don't have to do anything.

00:28:38.000 I got somebody with my back, Dave.

00:28:39.000 I think he's that godly.

00:28:42.000 I don't know if Skinamax counts as your late show.

00:28:46.000 It does to me.

00:28:48.000 Skinamax.

00:28:49.000 It does to me!

00:28:50.000 Every hotel I call, do you guys got Skinamax?

00:28:53.000 No.

00:28:53.000 What?

00:28:53.000 Dave, stop calling here.

00:28:55.000 We do have guest Wi-Fi.

00:28:55.000 We said no.

00:28:58.000 Yeah, but do you have Skinamax?

00:29:01.000 At home?

00:29:01.000 Yes!

00:29:03.000 Can I come over?

00:29:04.000 Paying for basic cable.

00:29:08.000 Waiting patiently for your softcore to come on at 1am.

00:29:14.000 Waiting for a Shannon tweet at 2.30.

00:29:16.000 I think there's a special on the Duke Lacrosse team.

00:29:19.000 Oh, that's great.

00:29:20.000 Alright.

00:29:21.000 Hey, let's move on.

00:29:22.000 Speaking of steamy bathhouses, Fauci.

00:29:24.000 There's some segues.

00:29:25.000 For a moment here, we have an audio clip from a recent show where Fauci said that he might, and oh my god, I really hope this is true, but of course I don't think so because I wish I loved anything as much as Fauci just loves being in front of the camera and or microphone.

00:29:39.000 But he did say he might consider a career change.

00:29:42.000 Is retirement or stepping back into a consultant role any like that?

00:29:45.000 Are you considering those options?

00:29:46.000 Brad, I certainly am because I've got to do it sometime.

00:29:51.000 I can't stay at this job forever unless my staff is going to find me slumped over my desk and they have to not do that.

00:29:59.000 What would you do if you retired?

00:30:00.000 Like, are you a pickleball guy?

00:30:01.000 Is there, like, some bowling career I don't know about?

00:30:02.000 There's something you're looking to do?

00:30:04.000 No, I unfortunately am somewhat of a unidimensional physician, scientist, public health person.

00:30:12.000 You haven't been a physician for 40 years.

00:30:14.000 That's what he should try, virology.

00:30:15.000 Yes.

00:30:16.000 Yeah.

00:30:16.000 Go into it.

00:30:17.000 Try to dabble in that.

00:30:19.000 Identify how he replicates.

00:30:21.000 Did he just say, I'm unidimensional and list off three things that he does?

00:30:21.000 Stop it.

00:30:25.000 Yeah, that's a good point.

00:30:26.000 That's a good point.

00:30:27.000 Try saving people?

00:30:28.000 We've been listening to this guy!

00:30:30.000 I am uni-dimensional.

00:30:31.000 Here's five things.

00:30:33.000 Follow the science fiction.

00:30:34.000 Yeah, that word works.

00:30:36.000 It's Elron Fauci.

00:30:40.000 It's gonna test your thetan levels, which now brings us to this week's 7 Plus 1.

00:30:43.000 7 plus 1 things Fauci wants to do next.

00:30:46.000 You forgot Vivan in the chamber!

00:30:53.000 Alright, so this is 7 plus 1.

00:30:55.000 It could be career choices, but it's really just things that he wants to do next.

00:30:59.000 They aren't necessarily careers, but they could be.

00:31:01.000 So Dave, let's have you go number 7, 7 plus 1 things Fauci wants to do next.

00:31:07.000 Set the women's NCAA 500 meter swim record.

00:31:10.000 Oh, well that would be, yeah, because he can do that now.

00:31:12.000 It's easy to do.

00:31:14.000 Number 6, things that Fauci would like to do next.

00:31:17.000 Stuff himself in a locker of his own volition.

00:31:20.000 So that would be a... that'd be nice.

00:31:22.000 For a change.

00:31:23.000 Yeah, he wants to, you know, sort of like re-appropriating it.

00:31:25.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.

00:31:26.000 You know.

00:31:26.000 Hey, how about let's... Nick, what's number five of top things that Fauci wants to do next?

00:31:32.000 Lesbian softball pitcher. 1.00

00:31:36.000 Oh, does he throw like a bitch. 1.00

00:31:37.000 You know what's so funny about that? 1.00

00:31:38.000 Did you watch the documentary?

00:31:39.000 Of course you didn't.

00:31:39.000 You shouldn't have.

00:31:40.000 He had that laminated.

00:31:42.000 What does he mean?

00:31:43.000 The documentary on Fauci on Disney.

00:31:45.000 I directed it.

00:31:45.000 What do you mean?

00:31:46.000 Did you direct it?

00:31:47.000 Oh my god.

00:31:48.000 No, I didn't.

00:31:49.000 On Disney?

00:31:50.000 Yeah, it's on Disney+.

00:31:51.000 Did he play a fairy?

00:31:53.000 Yes.

00:31:54.000 Well, they replaced The Rock with him in the Tooth Fairy 4.

00:31:58.000 He's the enforcer of the lower hockey leagues.

00:32:00.000 Why would Disney... Go ahead.

00:32:02.000 I think you know the answer to that question.

00:32:04.000 But he had that card.

00:32:06.000 He doesn't realize that it was embarrassing.

00:32:07.000 He had that card of him pitching on the mound laminated, and it's on his desk.

00:32:11.000 Made into a Topps card.

00:32:12.000 Made into a Topps card.

00:32:13.000 He came closer to hitting first base than home plate with that pitch, by the way.

00:32:17.000 Leah Thomas would have thrown a better breaking ball. 1.00

00:32:24.000 Excuse me, is that her name?

00:32:25.000 Yeah, I think so.

00:32:25.000 I think it's Leah Thomas.

00:32:27.000 Yeah, Stephen Hawking.

00:32:27.000 Is it Leah?

00:32:28.000 Stephen Hawking could literally just accelerate his... He had good junk, guys. 0.97

00:32:34.000 Yes, he did. 0.98

00:32:34.000 Stephen... His fingers were perfect for the... guard stuff on the corner. 0.98

00:32:40.000 I used to use him to... I'd put his hand in a vending machine to pick up the stuff.

00:32:45.000 Stop doing this.

00:32:46.000 This is debasing.

00:32:47.000 That's my hand.

00:32:48.000 Be breaking, Paul.

00:32:52.000 This is what happens when you know too much.

00:32:56.000 He's doing donuts on the pitcher's mound.

00:32:59.000 The whole crowd's going, throw that thing!

00:33:00.000 Also, as long as he's doing the donuts while Fauci is on the pitcher's mound, that would be great, wouldn't it?

00:33:05.000 Just a hit and run.

00:33:06.000 It's an underdog story you just stop rooting for because your team can't win.

00:33:09.000 I have eight minutes on Stephen Hawking and I'm still not giving it up.

00:33:14.000 No, absolutely not.

00:33:15.000 But it's so damn funny.

00:33:17.000 I have no reason to.

00:33:19.000 Fauci in the Petri dish.

00:33:20.000 He gets run over by Sammy Davis Jr.

00:33:21.000 in a Cadillac.

00:33:23.000 Get that one back. 0.82

00:33:24.000 Alright, 7 plus 1 things Fauci is most likely to do next.

00:33:27.000 Number 4, Gerald.

00:33:29.000 Cruella DeVille, but with beagles.

00:33:31.000 Yes, he'd be a good one.

00:33:33.000 Make a coat.

00:33:34.000 Make a coat out of it.

00:33:35.000 Well, after they get eaten.

00:33:36.000 7 plus 1 things Fauci is most likely to do next.

00:33:39.000 Number 3, homelessness.

00:33:41.000 Hmm.

00:33:44.000 I think he, yeah, that's perfect.

00:33:45.000 Yeah.

00:33:46.000 And, uh, number two, he said, you know, things he would most like to do next, uh, finally, uh, finally get around to creating his Laboratory Institute for Engineering More Severe Forms of AIDS.

00:33:57.000 Ah, more transmissible.

00:33:58.000 Well, you know, he's put it on the back burner.

00:34:00.000 It's a passion project.

00:34:01.000 Yeah.

00:34:02.000 There's only so much time.

00:34:03.000 And actually of the 7 plus 1, because Nick, actually, you were foreshadowing it earlier, 7 plus 1 thinks Fauci is most likely to do next.

00:34:10.000 What's number 1?

00:34:11.000 What he'd really like to do is direct.

00:34:13.000 Yes, he would.

00:34:14.000 He would like to direct.

00:34:15.000 And the plus 1, of course, is be named Trevago's next garden gnome.

00:34:18.000 This has been this week's 7 plus 1. 0.99

00:34:23.000 Damn it. 0.99

00:34:24.000 Ahh! 1.00

00:34:24.000 You'll forget Stefan in the chamber! 1.00

00:34:30.000 Nick DiPaolo of course, he's at Hyenas in Dallas this Friday and then Saturday Fort Worth.

00:34:37.000 We're just mentioning that again.

00:34:38.000 Go see him.

00:34:38.000 Two separate cities.

00:34:39.000 Funniest stand-up working in the country.

00:34:41.000 I'm pretty fortunate.

00:34:42.000 I've got the fastest man on his feet here, Dave Landau, and, you know, funniest stand-up.

00:34:46.000 I think that Another Senseless Killing, the EP, Nick, is possibly the funniest comedy album.

00:34:50.000 That's my favorite of all the tremendous work I've put out.

00:34:55.000 They're all great, but that is probably my favorite comedy album of all time.

00:34:57.000 And I shot it in a club, actually, and not a theater.

00:35:00.000 But yes, I jammed more into that album.

00:35:03.000 That's what I used to care about, stand-up.

00:35:06.000 No, I'm kidding.

00:35:06.000 Oh, stop it.

00:35:07.000 It'll never go away.

00:35:08.000 I was born that way.

00:35:10.000 But no, that was my favorite, too, Steven.

00:35:12.000 Yeah, it's a lot of fun.

00:35:13.000 And guys, you can listen to that, too.

00:35:15.000 I think it's on Spotify, it's on Pinder, it's on all those places where people can... And the cop that's on the cover holding the police tape, that was an actual Minneapolis cop who was shot.

00:35:27.000 It was in the national news.

00:35:28.000 Ambushed, yes, and had like 30-something operations on his arm.

00:35:28.000 Oh, really?

00:35:33.000 Him and that was two Minneapolis cops holding the... He had retired after he got... Wait, on Another Senseless Killing?

00:35:39.000 That's the one with the pizza on it, isn't it?

00:35:41.000 Pizza?

00:35:42.000 Yeah, Another Senseless Killing, the EP.

00:35:43.000 Isn't there a pizza on the cover of it?

00:35:45.000 What kind of stereotypical... I'll bring it up for you afterwards on Spotify!

00:35:48.000 There's a pizza on it because you talk about it... Oh, it's Ebola ZD!

00:35:52.000 No, it's...

00:35:54.000 No, it's the stool.

00:35:55.000 You're thinking of the dog father.

00:36:01.000 I'm sorry, I'm not adept.

00:36:03.000 It was a bar stool with blood all over it.

00:36:07.000 Remember?

00:36:08.000 Clearly.

00:36:08.000 No, I don't.

00:36:09.000 So the Ukrainian refugee crisis.

00:36:12.000 Okay, we get it.

00:36:12.000 Cop.

00:36:13.000 He backs the blue.

00:36:13.000 Good.

00:36:15.000 We get it.

00:36:17.000 Who would have thought a wop from Boston would back the blue? 1.00

00:36:21.000 Oh, did I trigger him?

00:36:22.000 No.

00:36:22.000 You're from Massachusetts, but you live in Georgia now.

00:36:25.000 I do.

00:36:25.000 I live in Savannah, Georgia.

00:36:26.000 I should have moved there 20 years ago.

00:36:28.000 I absolutely love it.

00:36:29.000 I can't imagine living on the eastern seaboard right now.

00:36:31.000 Why's that?

00:36:32.000 Some places.

00:36:33.000 It's terrible.

00:36:34.000 Why?

00:36:35.000 Not Georgia.

00:36:36.000 Well, I see what you're trying to do.

00:36:38.000 You're trying to lure me into what's wrong with it.

00:36:40.000 It's, you know, politics, awful, you know, crime, homelessness.

00:36:43.000 Not in Savannah.

00:36:44.000 No, I said on the eastern seaboard.

00:36:46.000 Well, technically that goes all the way down to Florida.

00:36:49.000 Okay, the northeastern seaboard, for crying out loud.

00:36:49.000 Exactly.

00:36:52.000 I don't need Snopes, I have Nick DiPaolo here.

00:36:54.000 I think New York specifically.

00:36:55.000 What do you mean eastern seaboard?

00:36:57.000 Are you talking about Myrtle Beach, South Carolina? 1.00

00:36:59.000 What the fuck? 1.00

00:37:01.000 You better do some voices for me. 1.00

00:37:05.000 Right here, a great friend of mine from the seaboard here.

00:37:09.000 It's Ed Sullivan.

00:37:10.000 Anyways, for you people in your late 90s, go to bed.

00:37:13.000 Really big guinea.

00:37:15.000 A really big greaseball.

00:37:19.000 Right here playing hyenas.

00:37:21.000 You're doing Ed Sullivan.

00:37:23.000 You're gonna bring out Nixon next? 0.51

00:37:23.000 We have Rich Little here. 0.51

00:37:25.000 There'll be a paper in the room.

00:37:27.000 Let me just say this about hyenas.

00:37:30.000 I love it when Rich Little does the Reagan.

00:37:36.000 It's timely.

00:37:37.000 You can see him in Vegas once a year.

00:37:39.000 Wait a minute, weren't you bummed by him performing in Vegas?

00:37:42.000 Yes, I was, for Sean Hannity's Freedom Tour.

00:37:45.000 Yeah, they were like, no, no, no, we're gonna do Rich Little instead.

00:37:49.000 I said, oh, okay, I'm gonna go swallow a knife right now.

00:37:52.000 Thanks.

00:37:54.000 I'm gonna go call Fred Travolina to salve my wounds.

00:37:57.000 Richard Lewis has the best Joke with a Fred Travolina reference in it.

00:38:06.000 Oh, is that the one?

00:38:07.000 I think I know, but I think I probably told you last time I was here.

00:38:09.000 Is it the box?

00:38:10.000 Yes.

00:38:11.000 Yes.

00:38:12.000 He's doing a bit about, you ever hear?

00:38:13.000 You know what I'm talking about?

00:38:14.000 Yeah, yeah.

00:38:14.000 But I'm not going to do it.

00:38:16.000 Good.

00:38:16.000 All right.

00:38:17.000 We'll do it on Mug Club.

00:38:17.000 No, we are.

00:38:18.000 It's chat Thursday.

00:38:19.000 Several hundred thousand.

00:38:20.000 We'll chat it up later on Mug Club, whatever that is.

00:38:22.000 Yeah, we'll have some fun.

00:38:23.000 Yeah.

00:38:24.000 Okay.

00:38:26.000 Come in, come in here, you know, as a guest.

00:38:26.000 Good show.

00:38:28.000 We plug a show at Hyena's.

00:38:29.000 No, I don't, I don't, honestly, I don't know what it is.

00:38:33.000 I know you can join up and get a mug.

00:38:35.000 Yeah.

00:38:35.000 Right.

00:38:36.000 Well, it's kind of spot on.

00:38:37.000 Boy, you get spaghetti and something.

00:38:41.000 What was the name of your last album?

00:38:42.000 Garlic?

00:38:43.000 Sun Dried Tomatoes?

00:38:48.000 Is it Goodfellas references?

00:38:50.000 If you want to trigger him, you know what you just do?

00:38:52.000 You just reference that scene in True Romance and, you know, because he's Sicilian.

00:38:56.000 Just tell him that, you know, there's someone hiding.

00:38:57.000 Sicilian. 0.92

00:38:58.000 I'm half seal and half a tank. 1.00

00:39:01.000 He's been kissed by a rose, this son of a bitch right here. 1.00

00:39:04.000 And burned in a fire pit. 1.00

00:39:06.000 Ball in the nose.

00:39:10.000 You know I'm more Irish and Scottish than I am Italian.

00:39:14.000 I just found that out from, you know what, 23 years.

00:39:14.000 Really?

00:39:18.000 Did you really?

00:39:19.000 Me, yeah.

00:39:20.000 Did your whole life you think you were just all Italian?

00:39:22.000 No, not all Italian.

00:39:24.000 My mother's Scottish and a little English.

00:39:29.000 Yeah.

00:39:29.000 So a drunk.

00:39:30.000 But there's some Irish back. 1.00

00:39:31.000 Yeah.

00:39:33.000 No.

00:39:33.000 Very boring.

00:39:35.000 Church going and uh... Oh, there we go.

00:39:37.000 But yeah, I'm actually like 1% more... I'm more Sub-Saharan African than Elizabeth Warren is Native American.

00:39:44.000 Me too, from the waist down.

00:39:46.000 Listen, I... What?

00:39:48.000 You know, Southern Italian.

00:39:49.000 There's a, you know, there's a moor hiding in your woodpile somewhere.

00:39:52.000 Yeah, that's what I said to Patrice O'Neill.

00:39:53.000 I said, thanks to your great-great-great-grandparents, I have some of your blood in me.

00:40:00.000 Savages.

00:40:04.000 Okay, go watch that scene in True Romance.

00:40:05.000 My boxing coach, if ever I'd mention it, he'd be like, he would just start turning it up on me and tuning me.

00:40:09.000 He did not like when I made that joke about Sicilians.

00:40:11.000 They have a whole thing about that.

00:40:12.000 I think it has to do with being, you know, conquered.

00:40:14.000 Okay, so, the Ukrainian refugee... 0.90

00:40:17.000 Crisis.

00:40:19.000 I'm just trying to think of a way out here.

00:40:20.000 I feel like Sammy Davis looking at the horn ornament and it's just about to go through my eye no matter what. 0.96

00:40:26.000 You're about to smash your head into it.

00:40:28.000 So let me set this up here because, and I know this will get Nick and everyone worked up, but this is something that really is pervasive.

00:40:33.000 It's obviously meant to be... It's meant to be a...

00:40:39.000 I don't know what it's meant to be.

00:40:40.000 I will say this.

00:40:41.000 In action, it's evil.

00:40:42.000 In practice, it's evil.

00:40:44.000 Right now, they are trying to present the refugee situation with Ukraine.

00:40:46.000 Let's just get rid of where you line up with Ukraine and Russia for a second.

00:40:49.000 Let's get rid of that.

00:40:50.000 There are refugees.

00:40:51.000 Okay.

00:40:51.000 There are women and children who need to go someplace.

00:40:53.000 Okay, let's just start with that.

00:40:55.000 Now, what is the left trying to do?

00:40:56.000 They're trying to say that, well, actually, the only reason that people now care about these women and children, the refugees, In other words, if you have empathy, if you have a heart, they want you to feel guilty in this case.

00:41:06.000 Why?

00:41:07.000 Because something something refugees, racism. 0.99

00:41:10.000 It's because they're white. 0.99

00:41:11.000 Don't take my word for it.

00:41:12.000 A lot of people on TV didn't expect a war like this to happen in, let's say, certain neighborhoods.

00:41:21.000 Now people are going to be like, oh, to see this in Europe, to see this.

00:41:26.000 Like, I'll tell you now, I don't know about you, but I was shocked to see how many reporters around the world, by the way, seem to think that it's more of a tragedy when white people have to flee their countries.

00:41:35.000 Because I guess what?

00:41:36.000 The darkies were built for it? 1.00

00:41:37.000 Okay, let's face it.

00:41:38.000 The world is paying attention because this is happening in Europe.

00:41:41.000 If this was happening anywhere else, would we see the same outpouring of support and compassion?

00:41:46.000 Well, we don't need to ask ourselves if the international response would be the same if Russia unleashed their horror on a country that wasn't white and largely Christian. 0.77

00:41:54.000 Don't you have the Ilhan Omar clip, too?

00:41:59.000 Can someone get that to me?

00:42:00.000 Ilhan Omar.

00:42:00.000 It was in the montage.

00:42:01.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.

00:42:02.000 So Ilhan Omar also said that this is something we need to do because of their weight.

00:42:04.000 Let me know when you guys get that.

00:42:05.000 The one who made love to her brother?

00:42:07.000 Yeah, yeah, exactly.

00:42:08.000 She needs to go to remedial not-bang-your-brother 101.

00:42:12.000 It's a night school.

00:42:13.000 Yeah, I don't know.

00:42:14.000 Maybe we have more sympathy because they don't bang their brothers.

00:42:16.000 You would think so.

00:42:18.000 But that's just, that's your privilege talking.

00:42:20.000 So this is echoed by the media, of course, and not just these folks who you just heard in late night.

00:42:24.000 Joy Reid, what is she?

00:42:26.000 I guess she's media.

00:42:27.000 Almost former media.

00:42:28.000 But here we have from ABC, let's read some headlines.

00:42:30.000 Europe's unified welcome of Ukrainian refugees exposes double standard for non-white asylum seekers.

00:42:36.000 Daily Beast, their headline reads, refugees from other wars want to know why white Ukrainians get VIP treatment.

00:42:42.000 And my favorite from The Guardian, Europe has rediscovered compassion for refugees, but only if they're white. 1.00

00:42:51.000 I thought the bitch was white! 1.00

00:42:54.000 That's what they want you to think it is. 1.00

00:42:59.000 Still my favorite quote.

00:43:00.000 That's a great quote.

00:43:02.000 Passionate.

00:43:03.000 Here's the thing.

00:43:04.000 It's 100% incorrect.

00:43:05.000 It's incorrect by the numbers, and it's incorrect in sentiment.

00:43:09.000 Let me just give you the numbers pretty quickly, okay?

00:43:12.000 2016, by 2016, Europe took in 5.2 million refugees from Syria, Iraq, and Afghanistan, okay?

00:43:17.000 As of December 2021, America, the United States of America, took in 65,000 Afghan refugees.

00:43:23.000 And the United States and overseas bases.

00:43:25.000 I need to make sure that I say that, otherwise people will fact check me on that, you know.

00:43:28.000 And Biden raised the refugee cap to $125,000 in light of the Afghanistan crisis, largely created by him.

00:43:35.000 Those are, you know, white Christian places.

00:43:37.000 Yeah, well, less than 1% were Christian under Obama, despite the fact that these refugees leaving from places like Syria, Iraq, Christians were burned in cages.

00:43:45.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.

00:43:46.000 You're kind of surprised, like, well, why is it less than 1% of you coming here are the people who are being burned in cages, but you're part of the demographic that burns them in cages? 0.67

00:43:53.000 They're looking for a new place to do burnings.

00:43:55.000 Yes, exactly.

00:43:56.000 Iron necklaces?

00:43:57.000 Have you considered the wicker man?

00:44:00.000 Albuquerque's nice this time.

00:44:01.000 Though it won't bring back your honey.

00:44:02.000 So let's go to Ukrainian refugees. 0.99

00:44:05.000 Most of them have gone to Poland.

00:44:06.000 Poland, Slovakia, Hungary, Romania.

00:44:09.000 Neighboring countries, to be clear.

00:44:12.000 And that's kind of the rule with refugees, right? 0.99

00:44:14.000 The international rules state that you're supposed to, at least the sentiment, I don't know if it's an unwritten rule.

00:44:19.000 No wait, it's a written rule.

00:44:20.000 You're supposed to go to the nearest neighboring country if you're fleeing persecution to be safe.

00:44:24.000 Now that doesn't mean that if you're just coming from South America, from a country that is not as good as the United States of America, you get to come here in a Dodge Caravan and claim refugee status.

00:44:32.000 Right.

00:44:33.000 And you don't get to come here just because the economy's not doing well in your country.

00:44:36.000 Right.

00:44:36.000 That's not refugee status.

00:44:38.000 So 65,000, 5.2 million in Europe.

00:44:40.000 Anyone want to guess how many Ukrainian refugees have resettled here in the United States?

00:44:45.000 Nick, do you want to take a wild guess?

00:44:48.000 Um, 46.

00:44:48.000 Yep.

00:44:49.000 Close.

00:44:50.000 That must be a lot, because we're being called racist for taking so many of them.

00:44:53.000 That's 40 more.

00:44:53.000 It was 7.

00:44:54.000 Ah.

00:44:55.000 It was 7.

00:44:56.000 Oh.

00:44:56.000 And now they plan to admit up to 100,000 Ukrainians, bringing that total to 100,007.

00:45:03.000 I was pretty close.

00:45:05.000 You were close.

00:45:05.000 I was being a wise-ass.

00:45:06.000 I hadn't listened to a thing you guys have said for the last 5 minutes.

00:45:10.000 And I threw in 46.

00:45:11.000 Appreciate it.

00:45:13.000 I love that you went for the comical number and were 40 higher.

00:45:17.000 We were 40 higher and 100,000 lower than the aspirations.

00:45:23.000 I blocked it out right after you mentioned the premise of them accusing us of being... I go ballistic.

00:45:31.000 I go ballistic.

00:45:31.000 There's a red... It's like a fire in your brain.

00:45:33.000 It is.

00:45:34.000 I have to just back off and go, I don't want to get... Well, I appreciate that you didn't back off of that, too.

00:45:38.000 If people want to go see his stand-up, he pulls no punches. 0.97

00:45:40.000 And I will say this, a lot of comedians these days have turned into pussy boys, so I do appreciate that about Nick. 0.98

00:45:46.000 And I get mad too. 1.00

00:45:48.000 Look, rape is terrible, of course.

00:45:50.000 Rape is one of the worst crimes you can possibly commit.

00:45:52.000 Some can argue worse than murder.

00:45:53.000 People have argued that.

00:45:54.000 Says who? 0.65

00:45:55.000 It's also... Well, okay, look.

00:45:57.000 You doing the splits out in front of Delta Kappa fraternity eight times a week.

00:46:02.000 Screaming, I'm super drunk!

00:46:04.000 I hope no one takes advantage of me!

00:46:06.000 You're fine.

00:46:07.000 Not interested.

00:46:08.000 Not necessarily the same. 0.98

00:46:09.000 But rape is horrible.

00:46:10.000 But accusing someone of rape falsely, knowingly, like Brett Kavanaugh, that's horrible.

00:46:13.000 Right?

00:46:14.000 Racism is absolutely terrible.

00:46:15.000 We can all agree.

00:46:16.000 Falsely accusing someone of racism is absolutely horrible, and it's what they do to try and destroy someone's life.

00:46:20.000 Of course people are infuriated.

00:46:22.000 Now, here's something.

00:46:23.000 Let me just presuppose this.

00:46:26.000 Maybe the reason that public sentiment, Americans, find themselves more sympathetic, more...

00:46:35.000 You know, I don't even know where they get this from.

00:46:36.000 I honestly have no idea.

00:46:38.000 I didn't even know that Americans were more sympathetic to Ukrainian refugees until the media said that that was the case and it's because we're racist.

00:46:44.000 Honestly, I know that most Americans are pretty sympathetic to refugees across the board, whether they believe that we should resettle them or not.

00:46:50.000 But!

00:46:51.000 But did they even escape?

00:46:53.000 Sorry to cut you off, but did they even escape or were they just already here and we were like, you might not want to go back?

00:46:57.000 There's seven.

00:46:59.000 Right.

00:47:00.000 Was there just one lifeboat?

00:47:02.000 How did they get here?

00:47:03.000 That's like seven Ukrainians who were visiting and tried to take back a vape pen for their WNBA playoff game. 0.85

00:47:08.000 It makes no sense.

00:47:09.000 They were probably here and they were like, oh, you can't go back.

00:47:11.000 They've taken over your country.

00:47:14.000 We're not even accepting them.

00:47:15.000 They were just seven.

00:47:16.000 Just seven.

00:47:17.000 They were just at their aunt's house.

00:47:18.000 But maybe the reason that Americans might feel more sympathetic is because these are, I don't know, women and children.

00:47:25.000 These are women and children leaving Ukraine because, contrary to what happened in the Middle East, and by the way, there have been refugees from the Middle East...

00:47:32.000 Always.

00:47:33.000 Since forever.

00:47:33.000 They've never found peace there.

00:47:35.000 It has never been the case since any of you watching right now have been alive.

00:47:38.000 No one wants to take in a bunch of refugees from the Middle East who left the women and children to be tortured and killed. 1.00

00:47:45.000 That was the problem that we faced with some of these refugees before. 1.00

00:47:45.000 Right? 1.00

00:47:47.000 And according to Pew Research, less than 1% of the Syrian refugees were Christian under Obama.

00:47:52.000 According to Pew Research, all references are available at ladderwithcrowder.com, despite, again, Christians being the ones who were primarily persecuted in those countries.

00:47:59.000 Now in Ukraine, sorry, not the Ukraine, I get it.

00:48:02.000 In Ukraine, refugees are women and children since Zelensky banned men aged 18 to 60 from leaving the country.

00:48:09.000 Which, by the way, is also a sign that you have a really good country.

00:48:12.000 Yeah, fantastic country if you're willing to run out.

00:48:14.000 But listen... Build walls to keep them in.

00:48:16.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.

00:48:17.000 You have to stay and fight.

00:48:18.000 Just go stand in the way of them.

00:48:18.000 Well, what does that mean?

00:48:20.000 Yes.

00:48:21.000 No, but they understand Russia's just going to do what he did to Grozny. 0.87

00:48:25.000 He's just going to bomb the hell out of it until it is absolutely the worst destroyed city on the planet, and then he's going to move to the next city.

00:48:32.000 And he's going to do it again.

00:48:33.000 He's doing it in Maripol right now.

00:48:34.000 If you look at some of the pictures that you see, and I don't know if I'm pronouncing that correctly, it is like the moon.

00:48:39.000 It is like another planet.

00:48:40.000 It doesn't look like a city inhabited by human beings.

00:48:43.000 We moved on from big girls.

00:48:44.000 Yes, we did.

00:48:45.000 When people are fleeing that, You have compassion.

00:48:48.000 The men are staying.

00:48:49.000 The women are coming from that. 1.00

00:48:51.000 They're fighting another country invading.

00:48:51.000 Right.

00:48:51.000 Right?

00:48:53.000 They're not fighting a faction within their country.

00:48:55.000 Right.

00:48:55.000 Like in Syria and other countries in the Middle East.

00:48:57.000 Right.

00:48:58.000 It's a different story.

00:48:59.000 I'm sorry.

00:49:00.000 Only the left in this country, while women and children are being slaughtered, can find race. 0.80

00:49:05.000 That's their focus.

00:49:06.000 Racism.

00:49:06.000 Exactly.

00:49:08.000 This country was built on inviting People from all over the planet, wasn't it?

00:49:12.000 I mean, think about it, we even let the Irish in!

00:49:13.000 Exactly!

00:49:14.000 Big mistake! 1.00

00:49:15.000 Irish are worse there! 1.00

00:49:16.000 Exactly. 1.00

00:49:20.000 Keep your famines overseas! 1.00

00:49:22.000 Also, I don't know if you know this, I don't know if you know a country that has a little bit of a racism problem sometimes.

00:49:26.000 The Ukraine.

00:49:28.000 What?

00:49:29.000 Do they really?

00:49:30.000 Yeah, Ukraine has some, they have some problems with some people who are, I don't know if you know, they're very white. 1.00

00:49:37.000 I hear they don't like Russians.

00:49:39.000 Yeah, that's what I hear, too.

00:49:42.000 Did you guys get the Ilan Omar clip, guys?

00:49:44.000 So this is also, of course, everyone's favorite brother-marrier-slash-banger, and Snopes doesn't know for sure.

00:49:44.000 We got it.

00:49:44.000 Okay, good.

00:49:51.000 They haven't verified it, so I don't know.

00:49:53.000 How about you do your job and verify it, Snopes!

00:49:57.000 Just carry the one, Snopes!

00:50:00.000 Here's Ilan Omar talking about something other than relations with her biological brother.

00:50:04.000 As we talk about this crisis in Ukraine, we have to make sure that there is a reckoning.

00:50:13.000 I hope this is a learning moment for all of us because obviously there's a difference in the way they talk about Ukrainian refugees who are white and the way black and brown and Muslim refugees from elsewhere are talked about.

00:50:30.000 Yeah, how did you get here and become a representative?

00:50:32.000 Exactly. 1.00

00:50:33.000 What a nitwit. 1.00

00:50:34.000 And who's they, by the way? 1.00

00:50:35.000 Right.

00:50:36.000 Yeah.

00:50:37.000 Is she married to a white guy? 0.99

00:50:39.000 Yeah, her brother.

00:50:40.000 Right.

00:50:43.000 That's her second marriage, yeah, to the white guy.

00:50:46.000 Pretty fly, though. 1.00

00:50:48.000 Honey, put your silly hat on and go pretend you care. 0.99

00:50:51.000 Yes, please do. 1.00

00:50:52.000 Thanksgiving's like a meat market to her.

00:50:58.000 Yeah.

00:50:59.000 Would you pass the Kramer?

00:51:00.000 No!

00:51:01.000 I love the pictures that they were showing, by the way, when she was talking.

00:51:05.000 Women, children, old men. 0.87

00:51:07.000 That's it.

00:51:07.000 Right.

00:51:08.000 And then they show the dog that will be killed or having to roam the streets in her homeland. 1.00

00:51:13.000 You need to train that dog to go kill the invaders. 0.89

00:51:15.000 It just sucks that that's the narrative, though, when it's seven people and you have all these different people working together to push this on everyone. 0.99

00:51:22.000 It's all about racism. 0.94

00:51:23.000 It's seven people in this country.

00:51:25.000 Hey, how about this?

00:51:25.000 How about we don't take Ukrainian refugees either?

00:51:28.000 How about that?

00:51:28.000 How about none across the board?

00:51:30.000 Yeah.

00:51:31.000 Is that fair?

00:51:31.000 Does that make me a prick?

00:51:33.000 How about none across the board? 0.83

00:51:34.000 White, brown, whatever.

00:51:36.000 Okay.

00:51:36.000 Fend for yourself.

00:51:37.000 Go to the nearest bordering country.

00:51:40.000 Not across the ocean.

00:51:42.000 Sounds good.

00:51:43.000 By the way, if you're pro taking in tons of refugees and spending other people's money and putting them in other communities and not your, take one first. 0.99

00:51:48.000 Yeah.

00:51:49.000 Go ahead.

00:51:49.000 Lead by example.

00:51:50.000 You got plenty of room, Nancy.

00:51:52.000 I know you have plenty of rooms in your house.

00:51:53.000 You got plenty of ice cream.

00:51:54.000 We know that for sure.

00:51:55.000 Take some people into your house.

00:51:57.000 Do it.

00:51:58.000 You could start in San Francisco, the city that you've turned into a hellhole.

00:52:01.000 Yeah.

00:52:01.000 Do that there.

00:52:02.000 By the way, I don't even care.

00:52:03.000 You know, put it in a townhouse.

00:52:04.000 Have them live under the stairs like Harry Potter for all I care.

00:52:06.000 Just have some skin in the game.

00:52:07.000 Just like, let's go.

00:52:08.000 You'd bring them over from Merripul and they'd look at San Francisco.

00:52:11.000 I'm not staying here.

00:52:11.000 I'm going back home.

00:52:13.000 There's poop in the streets.

00:52:15.000 Exactly.

00:52:16.000 At least it's dog poop in my home country.

00:52:18.000 At least I know I'm being shelled over there. 1.00

00:52:20.000 Take cover. 0.98

00:52:21.000 You, in this city, you use AIDS like a biological weapon.

00:52:25.000 They just come in and see all the pills.

00:52:26.000 They're like, this is insane.

00:52:27.000 This is like Hunter S. Thompson's house.

00:52:32.000 Leaving Somalia?

00:52:36.000 All right, so look, this is one of those issues where I just think you guys can comment below and it depends where you line up.

00:52:43.000 Refugees or no refugees? 0.85

00:52:45.000 And you know what?

00:52:45.000 If there are a few people out there who, you know, the few remaining, the four remaining actual white supremacists, you know, if you guys think we should only have white refugees, then let people know who to not like in the comment section.

00:52:58.000 Just let your freak flag fly, but Nick DePauw is going to be in Fort Worth on Saturday, Dallas on Friday, Hyenas, we're going to go to chat, and of course the huge Change My Mind coming Monday and Tuesday.

00:53:09.000 What's happening?

Louder with Crowder - March 24, 2022

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