Pearl - September 30, 2025


Even After Recognizing Them For Their Own Merit - I Was Called a Colonizer

Topics
black fatigue
Mentioned
Mother Teresa Doug
Why Modern Women Mourn Men Like Tupac and Not Charlie Kirk ｜ Pearl Daily Freedom of Speech Does Not Work If It Could Cost You Your Life

Episode Stats


Length

13 minutes

Words per minute

166.97

Word count

2,184

Sentence count

174

Harmful content

Misogyny

2

sentences flagged

Toxicity

15

sentences flagged

Hate speech

8

sentences flagged


Summary

Summaries generated with gmurro/bart-large-finetuned-filtered-spotify-podcast-summ .

In this episode, I talk about my experience with racism and how it affected me and how I dealt with it. I also talk about how I've dealt with racism in the past and how that affected me as a person.

Transcript

Transcript generated with Whisper (turbo).
Misogyny classifications generated with MilaNLProc/bert-base-uncased-ear-misogyny .
Toxicity classifications generated with s-nlp/roberta_toxicity_classifier .
Hate speech classifications generated with facebook/roberta-hate-speech-dynabench-r4-target .
Topics generated with Qwen2.5-3B-Instruct.
Hosts, guests, and mentioned names generated with spaCy (en_core_web_sm), reconciled against Wikidata.
00:00:00.000 We are seeing an influx of racism on Twitter.
00:00:03.740 It took four, you know, people are putting their experiences in the chat.
00:00:06.780 It took four years to fire him.
00:00:08.720 And I would just kind of find these patterns like over and over again where it just seemed like, and I'm going to continue.
00:00:18.440 So I end up leaving the sales job.
00:00:21.620 I end up moving to London, and I start my show in London.
00:00:25.420 And when I start my show in London, I end up having like probably an 80% black staff.
00:00:31.100 So again, I don't care about race.
00:00:33.740 I don't want to see color.
00:00:34.840 It's not something I really, you know, if somebody's good at their job, why would I not hire them, you know?
00:00:42.680 And it wasn't until about a year, a year and a half into hiring probably 10, 20 black people.
00:00:54.560 But I got allegations of racism.
00:00:58.180 I was told I was a colonizer.
00:01:01.140 I had a colonial mindset, whatever that means.
00:01:05.500 And I had all of these YouTubers I worked with throw me under the bus because I interviewed somebody they disagreed with.
00:01:16.120 Or I said things that they disagreed.
00:01:18.220 These were people that worked with me and were, I actually would have considered friends.
00:01:21.560 I hung out with them even outside of doing the show.
00:01:26.140 But it was like the first chance they got to, and this was with a 100, almost 100% black staff.
00:01:33.820 They threw the racism allegation at me.
00:01:36.240 And to be honest, guys, when this happened, I was devastated.
00:01:40.240 Like I didn't really talk about it online.
00:01:42.540 And I think I came off really awkward because I just did not see it coming.
00:01:47.500 I literally, I remember I was playing volleyball at the time.
00:01:53.480 And what happened was I interviewed this guy that was really controversial.
00:01:57.120 And by the way, I've always said I'll have anyone on the show.
00:02:01.140 And they knew me when I was interviewing 1,000 people that were controversial.
00:02:06.140 Like we would argue, we would debate about stuff.
00:02:08.340 And they basically disagreed with somebody that I had on.
00:02:11.420 And so they end up, I remember, they end up making like videos about me.
00:02:20.340 And it wasn't, I don't really care about having videos made about me by people I don't know.
00:02:25.800 But it's one thing when like people you interacted with like every day or you spent like a week with
00:02:31.900 make like hit pieces.
00:02:35.240 Like I don't think anybody understands like the pit in your stomach that drops when somebody does that.
00:02:40.200 Because anything, anyone that knows you personally, they take it as gospel.
00:02:45.200 And this was like a canon event for me.
00:02:47.260 This was like, I can't even put into words how sad I was that this happened.
00:02:52.380 I didn't really care about my reputation.
00:02:55.260 I didn't really care.
00:02:56.460 Like, you know, I already had a bad one doing what I do.
00:02:59.240 But what bothered me was like these were people that I trusted.
00:03:03.380 One of them, I actually let stay in my family's house because we had like, he booked, like there's
00:03:12.440 something happened with the studio where he couldn't record and he had to stay an extra
00:03:15.740 day.
00:03:16.580 And so I said, hey, my family has an extra room.
00:03:19.860 You can just stay there so you don't have to book an extra hotel.
00:03:22.240 That's nice.
00:03:22.940 That's actually going out of my way. 0.90
00:03:24.940 And maybe, maybe I shouldn't, maybe I was dumb, but I don't know. 0.89
00:03:28.160 I just grew up. 0.93
00:03:28.980 I grew up like that.
00:03:29.980 Like, my family always would let people stay in our extra rooms.
00:03:32.940 Like, we housed alcoholics that needed a place to go.
00:03:36.860 Like, relatives that had issues with alcohol, drugs, or just being young and needed to get
00:03:41.840 on their feet.
00:03:42.420 So, not that that's, it was only a day, right?
00:03:45.120 I'm not saying I'm like Mother Teresa or anything.
00:03:47.080 But do you know what it's like to bring somebody into your house and have them make a hit piece?
00:03:50.660 Do you know what that's like?
00:03:53.180 And, and what they would do is they wouldn't outright say I was racist, but they would allude
00:03:59.660 it so hard that they might as well.
00:04:01.840 They might as well.
00:04:03.440 I also had a co-host that I did this with for a year and a half.
00:04:07.360 I had a really, one of my staff stole a camera.
00:04:13.520 And I, what I'm not trying to do is, again, these are generalizations, not all, not all,
00:04:19.340 not all.
00:04:19.680 There was many of them that did not do this.
00:04:21.960 But I just never had the same experiences with other cultures.
00:04:27.100 And this is just me being honest here.
00:04:29.100 I met other cultures.
00:04:30.520 I did not have that same experience.
00:04:34.040 And I remember at the time, like, I don't think people realize how much that really affected
00:04:39.340 me.
00:04:39.800 I was bawling my eyes out crying because it just felt like all of these people that I really
00:04:46.280 tried to help, like, one of them, one of them we had taken out to dinner, like him and this
00:04:52.460 other girl that came out on our show.
00:04:54.740 We hosted them for like a week straight, did all this content.
00:04:58.080 And for about a year, he made all these hit pieces on me, taking things I said out of context,
00:05:03.580 just trying to make me look bad, racist, whatever, and just making fun of me for a year.
00:05:08.340 This was somebody, like, I'd spoken to.
00:05:11.280 And so I understand that it's not like these people owed me any loyalty, but I think there's
00:05:21.720 like a basic decency that you kind of expect from people when you go out of your way to
00:05:28.300 be nice to them.
00:05:29.220 And I learned fast that you can't, I'll tell you what.
00:05:33.500 But, and I would say that was my moment personally of black fatigue.
00:05:38.660 It wasn't really the BLM.
00:05:40.840 It was not that guy doing that in college.
00:05:43.380 It was not the guy that was calling fax lines at work.
00:05:48.300 I never really cared.
00:05:50.440 I mean, none of that really affected me too much.
00:05:53.000 It was when, and I always say the news hits your real life two to four years later, and
00:05:59.060 it was about four years after the BLM riots, where now my personal life is getting affected.
00:06:09.120 All because, all because they disagreed with somebody I had on.
00:06:13.360 And one of them, I actually tried to talk to behind the scenes and just say, hey, like,
00:06:17.840 what's your problem?
00:06:19.100 Like, you know, you know, talk face to face, not on social media.
00:06:22.900 And my point of this is not to rehash the drama or bring it up.
00:06:27.480 I've moved on in my life.
00:06:30.220 My point is that at some point, you know, you can't keep calling white people that are 0.67
00:06:38.860 nice to you racist and not expect us to get tired of it, especially when we're nice to
00:06:43.060 you.
00:06:44.560 Okay, let me keep going.
00:06:45.960 On top of that, I got ambushed on the only, like, black-owned network I went on, you could 1.00
00:06:53.420 say.
00:06:53.760 They didn't pay me.
00:06:55.580 And you saw it in the beginning of this.
00:06:57.340 They never paid me.
00:06:58.040 It's been a year and a half.
00:07:00.600 And the girl crashed out on me on live, and they're just screaming about how I'm a white
00:07:05.260 woman.
00:07:05.860 And that's what they did.
00:07:06.600 Like, it's like, they can scream at you about how you're wrong for being white, privileged.
00:07:14.200 And you know what?
00:07:15.020 I am white, privileged.
00:07:17.100 But it's like, but if I notice any patterns, then I'm the bad guy, and that's always how
00:07:23.860 it goes.
00:07:26.280 On top of that, I end up, after these hit pieces happen to me, it damaged my reputation
00:07:32.620 actually so much that it was very awkward for me in normal life.
00:07:36.520 Like, people don't talk about that aspect of the job.
00:07:38.940 Where it's might not, people might not outright bully you, but when you go to, like, volleyball
00:07:44.360 and half the team's not talking to you magically after this happens, it's very awkward for you
00:07:49.920 in normal life.
00:07:50.660 And so at some point, you know, white people, we really do get fatigued. 0.88
00:07:59.540 We do.
00:08:02.000 Now, a lot of the pushback I get is, well, what about other races?
00:08:05.440 And look, there's things I am fatigued with white people on, okay? 0.99
00:08:08.960 There's things I'm fatigued.
00:08:10.440 We could go into other races, but, you know, this is the topic today, so we're going to keep
00:08:14.840 going.
00:08:15.860 So, you know, I think what just keeps happening is, what I've noticed is with this topic,
00:08:22.920 they really do the same thing they do with women, where they keep gaslighting, and that's 1.00
00:08:28.300 kind of what happened for years with white people. 0.91
00:08:31.300 They would keep saying that it was, you know, that it was the white people that were racist,
00:08:36.220 and it was the white people that, you know, we had done, you know, we were just attacking
00:08:42.540 them or whatever, but, you know, at some point, you know, and I would just say at some point, 0.51
00:08:49.120 you know, white people get tired of being abused for being nice.
00:08:53.920 And that's kind of what I see, you know, and I follow some of these cases, and I just
00:08:58.880 don't understand it.
00:09:00.260 Like, you know, they said that there was a fight that broke out in a track meet.
00:09:06.280 You know, fights happen in high schools.
00:09:08.680 That happens all the time.
00:09:09.900 You can hit each other.
00:09:11.100 Like, you know, people used to be able to fight at high schools and not be scared that
00:09:14.940 someone would have a weapon. 0.81
00:09:16.580 And now, you know, a black kid stabs a white kid and he gets half a million dollars raised. 1.00
00:09:21.600 Like, what bullshit is that? 1.00
00:09:23.340 It's bullshit that all these people donated all this money to BLM. 1.00
00:09:26.680 What's changed? 0.99
00:09:27.460 What's different?
00:09:29.280 You know, they just keep taking advantage of white people's guilt.
00:09:34.620 Because I would say, generally, we're not trying to hurt anybody. 0.70
00:09:37.680 We're not trying to even see color, but it's like they just keep milking this and milking
00:09:42.640 it.
00:09:43.560 And at some point, we get tired.
00:09:48.540 You can tell me if he's on.
00:09:50.460 I know he wanted to give his two cents today.
00:09:54.160 Okay, no problem.
00:09:55.820 No problem.
00:09:58.520 Fatigue.
00:09:59.720 Sorry.
00:10:01.120 Black fatigue. 0.88
00:10:02.260 So, I don't know.
00:10:05.500 You know, and this isn't, and I'd like to say, it's not like you think as a white person.
00:10:12.700 I'll bring him on in a second.
00:10:14.220 It's not like you think that all black people, you know, there's stuff I love about black people.
00:10:19.280 And I really do.
00:10:20.220 And I'd like to make that very clear.
00:10:21.740 There is.
00:10:22.140 But it's just at a certain point, you guys can't keep calling us racist over everything.
00:10:32.400 I actually have a chart I made of how racism starts, and we're going to do it in a second.
00:10:37.160 You can bring it up, but I'll.
00:10:40.020 So, when you sit back down, I'll get up.
00:10:42.640 Does that make sense?
00:10:43.160 Yeah, okay.
00:10:43.420 So, and it's not like, it's not like, I'd like to be clear.
00:10:50.060 There are things I love about black people.
00:10:52.100 There are.
00:10:53.580 You know, here we go. 0.87
00:10:58.480 I think they have a better sense of humor than white people. 0.71
00:11:01.400 I think they're more fun.
00:11:02.420 Like, if I do street interviews, if I interview a white person, it's like a boring answer.
00:11:07.760 But if I interview a black person, I mean, they're a ton of fun.
00:11:11.640 You know, they're better at sports.
00:11:14.660 I love freestyling with black people. 1.00
00:11:18.880 I went to a cookout once in the hood, and it was a lot of fun.
00:11:22.360 I had a great time.
00:11:23.360 I got MVP of kickball.
00:11:27.620 They have the lowest suicide rate.
00:11:29.500 They do kill each other a lot, but they do have the lowest suicide rate, and I do respect that.
00:11:35.820 Like, white people, we just, you know, we just off.
00:11:38.120 But, you know, it's like, they're like, if I'm going to go out, I'm going to go out in, like, a shootout.
00:11:43.720 Like, I'm not taking myself out.
00:11:48.200 But it's just like, at some point, you guys can't keep calling us racist all the time and just expecting us to just take it.
00:11:57.760 Like, no, it's not like, hello, Pearl, big fan.
00:12:07.720 I have a question unrelated to today's topic, maybe for some other days, but I would love to know who are your female role models, if any. 0.95
00:12:15.560 Let me do my chart, and then I'll bring on Doug.
00:12:22.240 I do have the flowchart of racism.
00:12:26.760 Now, you may be asking yourself, how does racism happen?
00:12:30.980 Now, to be fair, there are some real racists, but I don't think people start that way.
00:12:35.500 We are seeing an influx of racism on Twitter. 0.96
00:12:41.000 Now, again, some of these are real racists, but what happened is you're nice to black people. 0.97
00:12:47.500 Then you're called racist, stolen from, attacked. 0.98
00:12:54.080 And then there's black fatigue, and then there's real racism.
00:12:58.120 And then you forget, and then it just keeps going.
00:13:02.360 So, yeah, that's what we got here.