Pearl - More Women Are Having Kids Then REGRETTING Motherhood

00:00:00.000 So today we're going to talk about how women we just take L's no matter what we do and we can't

00:00:04.920 handle our emotions and one of the normal emotions you go through in life is everybody's got regrets 0.99

00:00:09.500 but you can't dwell on it you can't waste time on it and what happens is women we have a tendency

00:00:13.440 to live in the past and so we just regret everything. I'm going to show you guys in the

00:00:17.740 series all of the things that women regret and it doesn't matter what it is it doesn't matter if

00:00:22.840 it's good or bad we regret no matter what. I don't think very controversial but motherhood

00:00:28.500 is a scam too many women have been lied to and deceived by society about motherhood everyone 1.00

00:00:35.300 is celebrating being a mother women only are happy to reproduce if it's with the top men in society 0.84

00:00:40.580 and unfortunately most women don't qualify and we're just not happy regardless so the unhappiness 0.64

00:00:46.580 just you know stays consistent so everything is a scam because nothing makes us happy it's secret

00:00:53.300 it's defined but no one has told women how hard motherhood actually is i'm not a mom but i'm a

00:00:58.980 daughter and a friend to many other women i agree because here's the thing women are so used to

00:01:02.840 having people do things for us that a lot of our canon event and life growing up doesn't happen 0.98

00:01:07.840 until later in life we're just lazy it's a female laziness epidemic i've seen my own mother and a 1.00

00:01:13.000 lot of my other girlfriends sacrificed their lives to motherhood so my best friend just had a daughter 1.00

00:01:17.480 two months ago and she told me jesse i know you don't want kids if that's your plan stick to it

00:01:22.560 don't change your mind and mind you my friend actually got support so when the baby was born

00:01:27.200 for the first month she got a nanny living with them taking care of the baby 24 7. she didn't have

00:01:31.520 to lift a finger except for feeding the baby and now her husband's parents are living with them

00:01:35.920 cleaning cooking she doesn't need to do much but still she told me it's exhausting and her body

00:01:41.040 starting to have all the little problems and not even to mention she lost a great career opportunity

00:01:46.080 because of this so my friend works in this big chinese company top tier in the industry her boss

00:01:50.800 really values her because my friend is really good at what she does and she's ambitious so her

00:01:54.940 boss wants to send her to the u.s to manage the north american business so she only needs to stay

00:01:59.340 in the u.s for two to three years and then return back to china immediate promotion to higher

00:02:04.020 leadership position basically the rest of her life is set you know you don't need to work hard

00:02:08.120 anymore you can just lay back chill great money easy life and now all of that is gone because

00:02:13.140 you can't just leave your newborn baby and go to the u.s and my friend told me her daughter is the

00:02:18.480 best thing ever happened to her she loves her so much she wouldn't treat anything in the world with

00:02:22.960 her daughter like all the other mothers but still she told me you know what being child-free is

00:02:28.460 kind of nice so i'm gonna yeah women don't want to be mothers we hate our kids i mean this idea 0.59

00:02:34.660 that women are nurturing is the biggest lie ever propositioned by society it's like men want to be

00:02:39.700 lied to so bad it's like women will go on camera and say i hate my kids and the men are like they 0.67

00:02:45.540 don't mean that and then women will go on camera and say i'm getting an abortion and the men are

00:02:49.860 like no they're really nurturing they don't mean that and then when you're like no i think they

00:02:54.360 mean it guys they're like pearl you hate women kids let me tell you why i regret having children

00:03:01.260 of course i love my kids i think they're like the best thing in the world and the reason i regret

00:03:06.820 having children is because i don't think this world deserves children the world that we live

00:03:11.940 does not deserve children i actually agree with that the world doesn't deserve children because 1.00

00:03:15.740 it's so messed up because women have all the kids and women are messed up and then the kids 0.89

00:03:19.020 have to deal with the mother and it's hell on earth but um i don't know like again why why 1.00

00:03:25.640 would you phrase it like that bitch you have kids this world you might see this someday it's so 1.00

00:03:30.240 fucked up and i hate that i brought these human beings here to live this i'm already here trying 1.00

00:03:37.800 gonna make the best of it and it's a shit show and i'm gonna bring more people into this and 0.99

00:03:43.000 they're the most amazing incredible just beings ever and they're so pure and perfect and the world 0.93

00:03:50.480 doesn't deserve them i mean i get it people want to have their families and they want to have kids

00:03:53.920 and whatever but it's just like so selfish like when i talk to people who actually want kids

00:04:00.060 it's always for selfish reasons that's true they don't want their kids to have kids they want their

00:04:05.500 kids to make to raise their status essentially always oh well I want a legacy or I want a mini

00:04:11.720 me or yeah I mean I don't know you still I wouldn't really recommend going on okay I'm just

00:04:18.320 gonna keep going almost three and she is beautiful she's funny she's pure in so many ways I look at

00:04:25.800 her and see this beautiful better version of me I don't hate my child but if I'm being completely

00:04:31.840 truthful, I 100% regret becoming a mother. Motherhood breaks every single day. It brings

00:04:39.800 out parts of me that I don't like, parts of me that I hate. I have become more impatient,

00:04:46.080 exhausted, overwhelmed. I feel like I'm constantly just trying to make it through the day,

00:04:51.440 just to relive it again tomorrow. I also really miss the woman I was before her. I look back at

00:04:57.660 her now and she is someone so far from who i am today she was beautiful free kind and optimistic

00:05:05.120 she believed she could manifest her own destiny she could decide on a friday night that she wanted 1.00

00:05:11.340 to go to dinner she that's what i mean women see here's the problem women are so useless they can't 1.00

00:05:16.380 cook a good dinner we can't we can't cook we can't clean and so we're so used to our whole 20s where 1.00

00:05:22.560 we live the life of queens and high status women even though we're low status um or like we should

00:05:26.940 be and so then when we go and have kids then we're low status and you can't go to the events you

00:05:32.700 can't do all this stuff and so if you're used to that and you've built your identity around that 0.68

00:05:36.920 you're gonna have problems get in her car and go somewhere anywhere she could sit on her couch and

00:05:42.620 watch netflix for hours and i didn't understand how much i loved that freedom until it was gone

00:05:48.480 what's interesting is that in my 20s i barely thought about motherhood

00:05:53.140 Then I turned 30 and like the flick of a light switch, it suddenly felt like everyone around

00:06:02.860 me had a family. Every time another friend told me she was pregnant, I was genuinely happy for

00:06:08.740 her and privately devastated for myself. That's what I mean. We don't have families for the right

00:06:16.300 I became desperate to find a husband and have children.

00:06:20.880 And looking back now, I've had to ask myself a really uncomfortable question.

00:06:25.540 Why did I want children so badly?

00:06:27.920 I don't know that I ever had a great answer, other than I didn't want to grow old and be alone.

00:06:33.980 I came from an incredibly loving family and a lineage of very maternal women.

00:06:39.060 So motherhood was just something I assumed would eventually happen to me.

00:06:42.820 i don't think i ever stopped and asked myself whether i was actually maternal or whether i

00:06:48.460 wanted the everyday reality of raising so she was spoiled that's what happened she was spoiled

00:06:53.060 she's a brat and so now having to put another person before yourself is just going to be too 0.90

00:06:57.960 difficult too hard we have a female laziness epidemic female laziness that's really what's 1.00

00:07:03.200 causing all this women don't want to have kids because we're too lazy to do anything ourselves 0.98

00:07:06.840 and even entertain ourselves right a child i got pregnant at 33 by someone i wasn't in a serious 0.54

00:07:14.880 relationship with and it became clear pretty quickly that we weren't going to raise this

00:07:19.300 baby together as a couple the ironic thing is that i was incredibly happy during my pregnancy

00:07:24.240 after years of feeling like everyone else was getting something i desperately wanted

00:07:28.660 finally it was happening to me yeah again she thought it was just going to be like instagram

00:07:33.140 and you know a baby barfing and stuff wasn't then i had all right let me keep going all right let's

00:07:38.800 my daughter and two weeks later i had a stroke from a postpartum complication

00:07:43.060 i ended up in the hospital while my elderly mother and my friends stepped in to care for

00:07:48.600 my newborn when i came home i think i was just grateful to be alive that i didn't even have the

00:07:54.200 capacity to process everything else a few months later the reality of motherhood started settling

00:07:59.760 in. I remember putting my daughter to sleep at night and feeling this enormous sense of relief.

00:08:05.440 I finally made it. The day was over. She has always been a good sleeper, so nighttime became

00:08:11.220 the one part of the day that belonged to me. And then one night, I had this realization that I

00:08:16.940 still remember. It doesn't matter that I made it to bedtime because tomorrow I'm going to wake up

00:08:22.180 and have to do the entire thing again. And the day after that, and the day after that. It felt

00:08:28.200 like Groundhog Day. I've also never been the mom who couldn't wait to take her baby somewhere.

00:08:33.800 Taking my daughter somewhere felt like a massive undertaking. Packing every...

00:08:37.880 Women just can't stay home. Getting her ready, getting myself ready, 1.00

00:08:41.980 worrying about naps and food and diapers and tantrums. And if...

00:08:45.900 You know, a humble idiot will learn. An arrogant idiot will never learn. 1.00

00:08:50.780 We went somewhere and she started crying or melting down. My instinct was always, 1.00

00:08:55.100 let's just go home. Home felt predictable. Motherhood never had, and it never will.

00:09:01.500 She's almost three now, and that feeling hasn't disappeared. There's this idea that as children

00:09:06.920 get older, things just get easier. In my experience, that isn't true. New worries

00:09:12.320 replace the old ones. When my daughter was around two and a half, concerns came up about a speech

00:09:18.040 delay. Suddenly, I was hearing words and possibilities I had never imagined being part

00:09:23.120 of our story including autism and that brought another wave of grief and regret i realized how

00:09:30.320 many assumptions i had unknowingly made about the child i would have before you become a parent you

00:09:36.220 picture a baby you don't necessarily picture a value yeah so this is kind of going back to what

00:09:41.240 i'm saying i don't i actually don't think the birth rate going down is the worst thing in the 0.99

00:09:45.000 world i know i used to say that it was um i don't think it is because so many women are just going 0.51

00:09:50.120 to be terrible parents it's like until we get men the kids they're just gonna raise terrible kids 1.00

00:09:56.000 another day another dollar another day another bit to go get my lashes done and this woman came 1.00

00:10:00.140 in next to me and her last check was like oh my gosh i haven't seen you forever and the woman was 0.93

00:10:04.120 like yeah because my kid just started kindergarten i've been so busy and she proceeds to tell her

00:10:09.220 lash tech about how she never used to want kids but now that she has a child she feels like she

00:10:15.540 has no time for herself and she basically heavily implies multiple times that she kind of regrets

00:10:22.760 motherhood and what really really broke my heart was when she said she didn't even have family

00:10:28.940 pressure like her parents didn't pressure her her parents weren't begging her for grandchildren or

00:10:33.860 anything like that but it was actually her husband who convinced her to have a child that really

00:10:40.200 pained me to hear because it's so rare to not have family pressure for this type of thing 1.00

00:10:46.740 especially in china and then for her to feel so strongly about that for so long bitches don't 1.00

00:10:53.480 want kids bitches do not want children they hate their kids only to be convinced by her partner 1.00

00:11:00.100 it's very clear too this is why i say you gotta let hoes be exactly who they are and stop trying 1.00

00:11:05.260 to make women like men again men want to be sold this dream so they're always like oh no you really 0.97

00:11:09.660 want kids no they don't she's the main caretaker of this child because she was talking about

00:11:14.900 just everything she has to do for her child and stuff like that it also really really broke my

00:11:19.720 heart when she said you know how she didn't want children for a long time she's like

00:11:23.220 which essentially means i didn't hang on for long enough like when i didn't want a child i should

00:11:31.060 have stuck to that and i should have hung on obviously it's really sad for a child but it's

00:11:35.560 so really sad for her and i i think about how many mothers out there regret motherhood and don't talk

00:11:42.680 about it or don't want to admit it and i also think about how many women out there who probably

00:11:49.580 wouldn't have become mothers if it weren't for external pressure whether it is from their family

00:11:55.100 or even from their own husband i'm 26 and i'm not in the place in my life all right let's keep it

00:12:00.540 going let's keep it going not love being a mom oh my god you guys are just saying it the mom the

00:12:06.280 kids scrolling on tiktok wait what mom my friend recently asked me she goes do you love being a mom

00:12:13.600 and i took a moment to think about it and i said i don't think i love being a mom oh no it's more

00:12:21.060 along the lines of i love being my son's mom if that makes sense like i love that he's my son

00:12:28.320 don't feel like i was born to be a mom even though i do tend to be a little bit more nurturing and

00:12:35.460 everyone always calls me mom like in my friend group i have friends who i don't think that the

00:12:40.540 women called mom are actually nurturing they're just controlling like love being a mom which is

00:12:45.900 great i personally just don't have that like i'm not like oh my god my entire life is being a mom

00:12:53.200 and i think that's okay right i think that as long as we are just doing our best i think that's fine

00:13:01.960 of course you think it's fine women always think doing the wrong thing is fine

00:13:06.300 this way but i regret having my kids i don't regret my kids but i regret having my kids

00:13:13.420 i say that personal wondering if i'm the only one that feels this way but

00:13:18.600 i regret having my kids i don't regret having my kids but i regret having my kids i say that

00:13:25.440 because doing all this stuff by yourself slash in separate households co-parenting with the other

00:13:33.460 parent is terrible and being a single mom used to be like almost like idolized in a way like

00:13:43.000 you know you're a strong woman you're doing this by yourself you're and it's like no 0.99

00:13:49.600 none of this parenting shit was meant to be done alone and I cannot stress that enough 0.94

00:13:55.080 like the strain that is on me is like so heavy like it's it's so hard for me to explain like 0.98

00:14:03.440 I'm so tired like mentally exhausted not physically but mentally and my kids are still

00:14:11.000 young they're only it's funny because if you compare this with men being single fathers 0.58

00:14:14.760 they always think it's the easiest job ever hold on where women think it's so difficult 1.00

00:14:20.960 and get older because dumb lazy dumb lazy dumb like that's always the answer to everything 1.00

00:14:26.720 and consumerism because like we have a spending problem so what happens is we buy too much shit 1.00

00:14:32.260 and then the house becomes messy and it's just like a never-ending cycle they're always going 0.97

00:14:36.740 to be my kids i love them to death yeah can you just imagine going on tiktok and being like mom

00:14:42.300 why did you why did you put this all right guys well let me know what you think in the comments

00:14:46.720 um like the video if you can and subscribe to the channel ring that notification bell 1.00

00:14:51.460 uh yeah these bitches hate their kids and i've been saying it for years and i get more vindicate 1.00

00:14:56.360 every year i become more and more vindicated in what i'm saying everyone screamed at me 1.00

00:15:01.220 everybody cried at me everyone said all this stuff just for you know saying water is wet

00:15:06.540 the sky is blue women hate being mothers like the video on your way out subscribe to the channel 0.99

00:15:12.340 and I'll see you next time 1.00

Pearl - October 02, 2026

More Women Are Having Kids Then REGRETTING Motherhood

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