Pearl - Stop Using ＂Body Positivity＂ To Excuse Laziness

00:00:00.000 what are you people always say what are you offering oh woman doesn't have to offer anything

00:00:03.680 yes you do if you're not taking care of yourself why would you expect to be with someone who is

00:00:07.840 like the top of the top if you cannot be top of the top so i think a lot of women are 20 pounds

00:00:13.200 from love okay because because a lot of guys will sleep down right i mean guys will sleep with damn

00:00:19.600 near anything if you ever see a guy's roster it's like incredible like a guy that's an eight will

00:00:23.760 go with the four it's like incredible but a lot of times there's like guys that like a girl but

00:00:29.200 they're just kind of hoping and i've heard this from so many guys where they liked a girl they

00:00:32.400 would date her but she just is a little too fat yeah a lot of women like the guy that they can't

00:00:38.880 get commitment from you're like 20 30 pounds away baby just get on the treadmill but guys

00:00:44.000 are never going to tell you have you seen um something similar with your clients or their

00:00:47.920 dating lives getting better after they lose the weight from both ends and like i i went through

00:00:53.120 this myself but like i can tell my own little story but for my clients i think a big thing is

00:00:58.240 just having more confidence with dating too where putting less emphasis on does the guy like me and

00:01:05.060 more on oh do I actually like him because they they like themselves more they know that they

00:01:09.380 look better they know that they're a better catch because yes your appearance like you kind of date

00:01:14.180 your league I would say for a lot of people uh for most people it's kind of how it works and so they

00:01:19.420 know that they can get better but for a lot of women yeah I've heard this from so many guys and

00:01:24.960 clients too where like the dating wasn't really going well but then they lost the weight they

00:01:29.040 dropped their part like who they were with and then started dating someone better because then

00:01:33.760 they realized they deserve better so it's it goes it goes both ways to it uh yeah because it's like

00:01:39.920 i don't know tell me what was your story you said you changed like dating when you lost the weight

00:01:45.280 yeah i mean i think just like i i mean i definitely had to like blow up with it but

00:01:50.320 But a lot of it is confidence. Like when you aren't that secure, I wasn't that secure in myself

00:01:55.880 at all. And like I once worked, I worked in corporate before I went off on my own. And for

00:02:02.780 one of my jobs, like my name is Amanda. I've never gone by Mandy, but I worked at this company where

00:02:10.440 my boss's name was Amanda as well. And during my interview, she was like, oh, I want to call you

00:02:14.640 Mandy. And I'm like, okay, sure. And then I got the job. And then for my two years at that company,

00:02:20.240 my name was mandy because that's just like sure this is what people will call me and so just

00:02:25.840 having not as much self like respect and that also translated into dating where my focus was on

00:02:31.680 a fake timeline for myself of i need to get married by this age have kids by this age

00:02:36.040 i just need to find the guy like who i can end up with and it was just like a bunch of you know some

00:02:42.360 normal people a bunch of losers too because i just wasn't really like my best self for it so

00:02:47.560 when you actually are a better person you can date better yeah and american women are so fat

00:02:53.240 guys just want someone that's thin you know they really i mean people will say people have there's

00:02:58.540 a what's the saying there's a kettle for every pot pot for every cup whatever that is like there's

00:03:02.860 always someone for someone but i would say if you want to date a guy who is good looking who

00:03:08.640 makes money who takes care of himself what are you people always say what are you offering oh

00:03:14.100 woman doesn't have to offer anything yes you do if you're not taking care of yourself why would

00:03:17.860 you expect to be with someone who is like the top of the top if you cannot be top of the top oh my

00:03:23.040 gosh that's incredible i i've interviewed so many fat women that say they want in shape men

00:03:27.620 and i'm like yeah they'll screw you i mean a black guy will do it let's just

00:03:32.340 i'm at i'm at the people people will there's always someone for someone but like

00:03:39.520 black men and fat women are like that does not make sense i mean that not that but like

00:03:45.540 oh yeah because you know why why would you want to date someone who goes to the gym when you don't

00:03:52.380 even go to the gym yeah what do you have in common you like you both like that he goes to the gym i

00:03:57.660 don't know people are it's just it also just comes with like taking care of yourself my husband works

00:04:03.160 out if he didn't work out we wouldn't be a fit i want someone who like goes to the gym and does

00:04:08.180 that what do you think about women that gain weight after uh marriage like that's really

00:04:14.020 common where they yeah yeah men too right yeah go look at my recent i made a lot of people mad

00:04:21.860 recently on um instagram because i created a video and i said if my my husband ever got fat

00:04:27.380 like i would tell him like just as he would tell me never have to tell me but uh there's a lot of

00:04:32.660 there's a lot of like uh less than average people in my comments being like your weight should not

00:04:40.420 you should love anyone at any size and i said no as a parent your love is you will love them with

00:04:45.780 whatever but for your part like for whoever you're with like you should take care of yourself i think

00:04:50.260 that people who let themselves go once they get married did not have anything like set for them

00:04:55.940 before they got married because it just it's unnatural to let yourself go to an extent when

00:05:01.860 you've been taking care of yourself for however long that doesn't really happen you don't see

00:05:05.700 people like that who had like good habits prior now for those who let themselves go after the

00:05:10.500 wedding after whatever it's probably because they were just trying really hard during dating

00:05:14.580 for the wedding and then they're like okay i'm safe now what are you safe from like you don't

00:05:18.740 look good you don't feel good and in shape guys don't want to deal with your bad habits like

00:05:24.340 because you're going to bring him into his lifestyle like i don't know if you're into

00:05:27.060 more traditional gender roles and you want to cook for he doesn't want you to cook

00:05:30.180 gross food or like food that's gonna make him fat if he's in shape you know exactly like what again

00:05:36.100 like what is what is your offer because at some point it's not just i always see stuff on social

00:05:42.420 where it's like the woman's role is to just exist and i'm like what are you talking about

00:05:46.260 just exist with what like create your own life do your own thing like yes you're existing but like

00:05:51.780 you can do more than that too yeah why not just sometimes just lazy women i just cannot stand

00:05:59.300 i cannot like it's just they have an excuse for everything i think it's because the world kind of

00:06:04.500 coddles them and they just they won't tell you you're fat they won't tell you you're in a bunch

00:06:08.900 of debt they were like i'm trying to think of a good word for female losers and i i have to come

00:06:14.980 up with this i just say i like i love the word loser because it's not being a loser in your own

00:06:19.380 life you're literally it's your life why are you acting like the person that you'd be like yelling

00:06:23.700 out on tv being like get your together just do it like it's not it's your one life but yeah

00:06:29.140 I think that women they just they make excuses they they see all of this garbage of it's your

00:06:34.700 metabolism it's your genetics it's your hormones it's like you have a soft life like be feminine

00:06:40.940 I'm like well it's not very feminine to be as I used to deal with binge eating to be stuffing your

00:06:45.240 face and like holding on to weight because that's body positivity no it's take care of yourself and

00:06:51.160 most of your ancestors were farmers like none of your ancestors had soft lives like I don't know

00:06:56.320 this idea like we had like 20 years in the 50s where women like stayed home maybe had softer

00:07:01.860 lives for like 20 years but their husbands were also at war you know yeah no go go watch the

00:07:08.480 recent dinosaur netflix documentary where it talks about all the dinosaurs and like where the world

00:07:14.460 started how everything started and like it's just it will put a different perspective on things but

00:07:19.860 with women having a soft life now it's like what the hell does that even mean if you want a soft

00:07:24.180 life work hard now and then you'll have a soft wife to get from it google a day in the life of

00:07:28.900 the amish that was your that was your ancestors like they're like they're using all these old

00:07:34.980 machines it's no wonder they didn't have to die it because their life was so like calorie

00:07:39.940 they're working for it yeah you have a machine heavy or work for a separate heavy yeah for sure

00:07:47.060 turn the butter do you think um health is a deal breaker for marriage in the sense of like someone

00:07:53.060 taking care of themselves yeah like um i don't know if if you're with a partner that won't lose

00:07:59.740 weight do you think that's a deal breaker yeah i mean like i thought well it's what if it's what

00:08:06.440 do you think duh like of course like when i was when i was 20 pounds heavier i was more depressed

00:08:12.640 like people who are depressed of course there can be this is a vague answer but like if so if you're

00:08:17.620 dealing with someone who's depressed help them right of course that's it but people love to be

00:08:22.820 all hypothetical well what if it's this what if it's this what if it's this it's not that yeah

00:08:27.440 it's not that they're just you know I wouldn't date someone I wouldn't want to be with someone

00:08:31.460 who is like overweight that's just not what I'm doing and I chose my person so like check that

00:08:39.560 off what do you think about um I don't know because I see it on social media all the time

00:08:45.360 where women are mad that men like thin women yeah what do you think is you can find a guy who doesn't

00:08:52.040 like thin woman like yeah i'm sure that they have like platforms for that to date someone who

00:08:59.520 likes that but like how can you get mad at such a generalized thing you either if you want i don't

00:09:06.180 know like lose the weight unless unless find someone who loves you for who you are and you

00:09:10.360 want to keep your weight perfect there will be someone i'm sure out there like that but it just

00:09:14.560 i don't know stop being at the same time stop blaming men for like your your problems like

00:09:19.340 you can find someone worthy to date too. Fuck my date. Yeah, no, I agree.

Pearl - March 11, 2026

Stop Using ＂Body Positivity＂ To Excuse Laziness

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